#studying with a mental illness

[lottiestudying]

08.08.2024—moments of clarity & peace in a chaotic day. back in psychiatric care

[ed-recoverry]

I love you everyone with crooked teeth!

I love you everyone with yellow teeth!

I love you everyone who has braces!

I love you everyone who wears headgear!

I love you everyone with missing teeth!

I love you everyone with fake teeth!

I love you everyone with gaps between their teeth!

Keep smiling! It’s beautiful!

[yellow-sword]

Worse than me

[edlucavalden]

Mithrun and non-visible disability

Yk, I've never seen people talk about this, but Mithrun is a very accurate depiction of having a non visible illness

I'd like to interpret mithrun's bastard origin to be an allegory for an invisible disability (I'd argue its neurodivergance, but it could be anything); An aspect of yourself that you are born with (in this case; born from) that is seen as inferior but it is not obvious.

He's even lucky—since that part of him is that of benefit. His infidelity gave him silver eyes and sharp ears after all (if you can catch the metaphor). from the outside, He's just a normal person, a person worth respecting because he's fits the standard.

However, he knows he does not fit the standard. it's just a lie. He hates himself—so, so much bc of that. It causes him to over-compensate through complete perfectionism and a high sense of self pride. He has to keep a big image in order to protect himself. it's the only thing that can get him loved.

However, that superficial ego gives him terrible imposter syndrome. He knows he doesn't deserve it, but he wants to. like everyone, he craves love and safety. So, he looks down at everyone, hyperfocused at their flaws (he can't be inferior if everyone is worse, right?) whatever it takes to prove himself that he deserves love.

He knows he's weak, but he has to show to everyone that he's strong because any slight sight of weakness would be detrimental since he knows that his humanity is conditional.

He knows that if he shows the truth and how he doesn't actually fit the status quo, he will be ostracized and rejected.

He knows—because his brother is proof of that.

Obrin's disability is obviously visible; Shown through his physical characteristics (his frailness and the lack of family traits). However, his discrimination may be due to this visible disability. he isn't nessesarily ostracized for those traits. His features aren't the (main) reason why he's perceived as inferior in the social hierarchy. it's instead because he's rumored to be a bastard child. This is why he hates his brother so much.

Obrins physical characteristics are just "symptoms" that perpetuate their prejudice towards infidelity (if were going by the disability allegory, think; this person is too sensitive, it must be bc of the autism...). By doing so, his brother indirectly taught him to hide that part of himself.

He hates Obrin because he is the physical manifestation of what will happen to him if his infidelity (disability) is revealed. He is the same plane as his brother after all, The only difference is that he's fortunate enough to be able to hide it.

It's very interesting how his hatred to Obrin isn't because he's genuinely bigoted and ignorant towards him, but because of his own personal internalized ablelism just projected. (It's ironic how contrary it is; he hates his brother because he sees him as equal) very much paralleling visible and nonvisible disability in intimate familial relationships.

The fact mithrun is the bastard child, not him. Imagine the burdening guilt and shame that comes with the knowledge that he could (or should) be one in his place.

He's constantly paranoid of thoughts that he's not good enough. That's why he was so upset when he was sent to the canaries or when he saw Obrin and Sultha together.

Because those are signs that Obrin is better than him and he could not forgive that (how can someone like him, completely ostracized from society, and be so content...?). And that sign proves his paranoia of not being good enough are correct.

mithrun's insecurities, fears, and behavior very much parallel that of being a high masking disabled person.

Hes is a flawed disabled character, but one you can also sympathize with.

He isn't a perfect victim. He delves on how a disabiled person who's so intrenched in a heavily ableist and bigoted society can be a victim to its bigotry and be taken advantage of (The demon. I didn't touch on that topic, as much as i would love an essay about how the demon preyed on mithruns vulnerability regarding his own disability but unfortunately, that might be too triggering for me lawl!) while also actively participating in it and perpetuate said beliefs

And that means so much to me

[bunnydevs]

Hello! I made these this morning and thought I'd share. You can print these or use them as inspiration for your bullet journal-- whatever works for you. I made one daily cleaning checklist with suggestions and one without. Enjoy :0

I originally made these for myself (since it's easier to remember if I have something I have to physically "check" off) but realized it wouldn't hurt to share.

[simikae]

i love you. i’m glad i exist

[prfctemi]

Bible Study- Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 ♡

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace."

In a time like now filled with many distractions, it is easy to be tempted by procrastination. As a college student, I tend to be very harsh on myself when I am not as productive as I would like to me or if I spend too much time doing things other than studying or work. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 reminds me that there is a time for all things to take place.

Be kind to yourself when you fall short of your expectations because every season has its purpose, and it's okay to have periods of rest and downtime <3

[leafwateraddict]

I like him a normal amount (IM A LIAR IM LYIINGGG)

Tumblrs prolly gonna eat the quality of these lol-

Mostly inspired from @edgedalong s horrortale panel redraws (LOOK AT THEM THEY ARE VERY COOL >:DDD)

First three screenshots are from @horrortalecomic

And the last one is from an fnf mod by WassabiSoja on youtube (its incomplete but very good check it out)

[apollokyler]

me trying to remember how to draw... it's been a while... offers you a quick sketchy doodle as i'm doing homework for 7 languages and a research defending presentation

[angel-dustblgs]

"Should I kill myself or have a cup of coffee?"

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

These are equivalent.

Actually, no they're not. We actually know who wrote The Lord of the Rings.

[lottiestudying]

24.10.2024—snaps from the hospital. currently working on the last essay for my bachelors degree(s). crazy times

[ed-recoverry]

Experiences that can be traumatic that I see little to no recognition of it being traumatizing online.

Reminder your trauma is valid and absolutely real, even if you don’t see many posts about it.

***NOTE: not all of these are always traumatic, just have the capability to be traumatic! Just want to confirm if any of this did happen to you and you feel it severely impacted you, it is valid and real.

Bullying (emotional, verbal, and physical)

Mentally ill parents and or siblings

Disabled parents and or siblings

Medical trauma

The silent treatment

Poverty

Witnessing death (violent or otherwise)

Automobile accidents

Non-life threatening injuries

Natural disasters

Witnessing abuse (even if you aren’t abused)

Community violence

Sudden death of a loved one

Being a refugee

Discrimination

Online grooming

Frequent moving

Teacher abuse

Exposure to substance abuse

A parent or sibling dealing with addiction

Imprisonment

Fire or explosions

Emotional neglect

Financial abuse

Threats of deportation/taking kids away/sending you somewhere

Blackmail

Stalking

Pretending to hit you

Near death experience

Pregnancy, birth, and or abortion (pro choice)

Experiencing hallucinations, delusions, or psychosis

Abuse from someone younger

Divorce (peaceful or otherwise)

Body shaming / constant critiquing of appearance

Incarcerated parent(s)

Controlling food intake

Medical neglect

Hoarding/extremely dirty household

Parent(s) forcing you to lie

Forced confinement

Being exposed to porn or sexual imagery or objects at a young age

Parents talking to you like a friend and or adult

Being forced to take on adult responsibilities (physical and emotional) as a child

Chronic or terminal illness

A parent or sibling with a chronic or terminal illness

Being a scapegoat

Public humiliation

Caring for a parent or sibling as a child

Sleep deprivation

Having a disability

Please feel free to add on any I forgot

[pixieverse-icedtea]

too tired to study, too scared to fail

[alastair-1205]

"Is there anything Wukong could do that would break his hold over you?" -Peng

I don't know why more people aren't absolutely feral over this line like I am because like. Holy shit??? Those two are literally trapped in each other's orbits its fucking cannon. I swear i saw this line in a fanfic once but its so fucking true because (at first at least) Macaque had no reason to stay after LBD and even before that honestly but he did and he keeps doing so out of his own free will. There were so many points in the special where it would have made more sense/been safer to just leave but he didn't because he fucking cares, not only about Wukong but about others in general again and Peng can fucking see it.

Macaque and Wukong bring out the worst and (sometimes) best of each other while trying to become better people. Macaque doesn't even deny anything either, this just leads into his fucking iconic "straight up, I never liked you" and like. I'm losing my mind yall.

They have a hold on each other that, despite everything, has remained. So much so that Macaque gets called out on it by somone who knew them at their closest and I'm-

Those two dumbass gay monkeys are so fucking stupid and complex and hurting and healing and I love them.

[trans-axolotl]

Image description: [ A digital poster with a beige background and a small graphic of a book that has yellow flowers growing out of it. Text says: Psych survivor Zine. Open call for submissions from Mad Artists. Looking for pieces that explore how psych survivors resist psychiatric violence, with a special focus on transforming our medical records. Pieces exploring topics in mad studies, antipsychiatry, and peer support are likely to be a good fit. $100 Stipend. Deadline for proposals: March 31st. For more information and next steps to submit artwork, please go to https://tinyurl.com/psychsurvivorzine. For any questions, email Elliott at psychsurvivorzine@gmail.com]

Hello everyone! I am thrilled to announce that I'm searching for collaborators for the first edition of a Psych Survivor zine!! I've been working on this project for a while, and there are several other components that will be rolled out throughout this spring (if you aren't an artist/writer but still want to be involved, keep an eye out on my blog.) This zine is going to be physically published and hosted on a website created specifically for this project.

This zine is open to anyone who identifies as mad/mentally ill/neurodivergent/psych survivor/ex patient, and any form of art is welcome, whether that's poetry, critical essays, digital art, photography, or anything else. Due to funding constraints, I will likely only be selecting 10-13 people to add to this edition. This edition is focused specifically on abolishing and transforming our medical records, and click on the link above to read the full prompt.

Please feel free to email me or message me on tumblr with any further questions, and I'm so excited to hopefully work with some of you on this project!