#stressed out over forms
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I hate filling out forms where you have to self-report or assess your own health because I feel like I am failing a test that should be foolproof. Jokes on them, I am the fool and I don't know how to answer half these questions without feeling like I have to write an essay to explain why I ticked a box.
#stressed out over forms#I always question if neurotypicals struggle the same way#Don't have me rate my experience I will agonise for hours if you mean by my standards or society's standards or a secret third thing
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it was just going to be a few warmup doodles but then she infected the rest of the page like the ever eternal and spreading spores. hod!!! hod. hod :)
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#hod#hod lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#I GUESS i almost forgot i drew her box form#lobcorp spoilers#and michelle actually. ..#both very tiny. itty bitty. microscopic#other sephirah there too as normal. i cant have her alone. and Angelina as well on the top patting her#i have a hard time fully capturing her for some reason. in my mind. maybe its because is the disconnected period!!! mentally#she genuinely wishes to care and be kind yet theres a dissonance with what she does..? or how it ends up being taken or what she does to en#up bringing those actions into reality. she can be forceful? wanting to have employees attend therapy sessions and meetings for suppression#tactics. which i think is also something the safety team is incharge of iirc. so that means shes doing way more that what she needs to on#her job as a sephirah. just for the sake of employees#she really does care as shes one of the only to Directly attempt to change their circumstances and quality of life and health#sure chesed doesnt punish employees when they dont do their work assigned or stress them out with work#but he doesnt actively push to attempt to make changes to aid employees besides the research perks which is to the manager#yesod IS right next to her and does also genuinely care but when it comes to employees hes distant at best when it comes to them and the#way he tries to protect them is by enforcing rules but he doesnt really create or attempt to help them like hod does#yesod is sort of a passive? way of doing it. yes he doesn make a push to enforce said rules but he doesnt make new ones. just follows what#is already there in place. hod tries to make new ways and not just for the safety of people like how yesod's has them physically fine and#not letting them over a certain threshold of mental corruption but she tries to have a program to Directly Address such a thing#its born out of care but the genuine worry of being a good person and her naivety ends up having it do more harm than good#sure there may be some employees that actually like and find it useful but so many are just accepting to their fate of Dying to where#her care seems pointless. shes a sephirah and to them a literal metal box why would they go ahead and feel bad for what an 'ai' is feeling#as she is interrupting their free time in the company#which is rude. and shit. iirc the counseling is compulsory but people go because shes a sephirah and their superior. the thought was there#but again it comes off wrong and ends up not working because shes their superior in the end#EEK!!! yeah... hod. the hod. there is WAY more but i can't fit it all here and i already typed enough
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the fact that i immediately landed an awesome job right out from graduation but then got covid in august and now my brain doesn't work right and i might lose my job because of it . there's a funny joke in here somewhere maybe
#txt#haha. like. how lucky was i to get this job. and unlucky to get sick and have my brain fucked over#also a loss of time perception. time does not move for me it feels like 7am still and its 10am#i feel like i got lobotomized. brainfog and much less of a filter of what i say/do and fatigue etc#shortness of breath when im stressed too. fucking annoying#i keep fucking up on the simplest tasks at work. literally filled out a simple form wrong that i've been doing right since day 1#and my supervisor is patient and i tried explaining brainfog but idt she takes it seriously and she gets more annoyed the more i screw up#and like. i need this job!!!!!!!!!!! it pays disgustingly well!!!!!! but if i cant do simple tasks right anymore then what am i even doing#ive had this stuff since late august but its so much worse suddenly and i dont know why :((#to be deleted /#<- if i can even remember i made this post at all LOL someone shoot me
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Thinking about queerplatonic Calf1sh….
#hear me out chat. hear me out#yes I do love romantic calf1sh BUT the idea of Callie and Acht living their lives together as besties is so so fantastic to m#*me#Callie finding a friend outside of Marie and receiving a new form of support in her life. Acht finding their first true friend on the#surface outside of marina pearl and agent 8. do you hear me. do you hear me chat#them bonding over wanting all the issues in their life to go away-Callie relating to Acht’s desire to focus solely on music and wanting a#close friend in their life (headcanon territory-I imagine Acht is hella lonely after marina leaves)#Acht relating to Callie’s stress and wanting to escape her life of fame to the point where she’d let herself be changed#yes this can play into romantic calf1sh too but it hits different when they’re queerplatonic imo#this all being said-I love both so much OUGH#speaklax#calf1sh#callie splatoon#callie cuttlefish#acht mizuta#dedf1sh#Splatoon
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It is insane to me that Mary Hatford abducted her child to keep him from being killed or sold and then went on to never show him an ounce of affection and was just another hand that hurt him. wtf??
#aftg#mary hatford#neil josten#nathaniel wesninski#all for the game#at that point why not just go stay with your family anyway?#why would you want to spend the rest of your life on the run#stressing out over you and your child getting caught#when you could have like a stable life protected with your family?#maybe- I don't know-- maybe that wasn't a thing that could happen and that's why they had to run still but#it sounded as if they *chose* to spend life on the run versus just staying with her family and at that point it makes no sense to me#it's like she kept him safe but she wasn't a safe place for him idk#I just wish I knew what was going through her mind when she made all these decisions what inspired her to abduct him#what kept her running what was within her that made her want to keep him safe#like what is her form of maternal love and affection? because it's not *actual* love and affection...
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The opposite to giant and monstrous Chase Pep and Hangry Fiend - Sopping Wet Creature Pep and Beanlette Fiend!
Idk what Fiend is hissing at, but it is probably something that is upsetting to (or will potentially further upset) Pep
Or someone called them cute, who knows
#sona tag#oc: fake bean#Beanlette Fiend is about as threatening as a feral kitten but they still have quite the bite to them!#it is also much more likely for both Pep and Fiend to turn into their small forms at the same time#since they both get stressed out by similar things like fireworks for example#Fiend has a bit more control over the change than Pep but they'd also probably change in solidarity for their friend#even at the risk of being called cute or getting picked up and getting unwanted affection#any ways today was weird so something silly bc I can't focus on anything I should be working on kjdkdg#fake peppino
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Ok so now that I’m over the shock of having managed to do the entire game out of order, this scene
IS REALLY FUNNY TO ME
Link is over here and he’s just about finished saving the world, and HE DIDNT FREAKING TELL ANYONE
Like LINK
There are sometimes where communication is necessary!!!
Poor Purah
#Purah tho#she’s over here stressing#trying to figure out how to form a plan#and she does#and then finds out links already done it all#lollllll#loz#zelda#link#legend of zelda#tears of the kingdom#Loz totk
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with the year coming to a close, i hope that anyone who's reflecting about how the year went remembers to be kind and fair to themselves with how you evaluate the year as a whole.
i think there are definitely times when life throws things that are... Not So Great at you. whether if it's some external circumstance that surprised you, or maybe your mentality wasn't at it's best. i wish for anyone who's encountered those kinds of challenges to be able to triumph over them and be able to say that they got through it.
heck, it might still be a work in progress even though you've kept chipping away at it, and that's ok! the results will show themselves eventually as you work through it! and i hope that we can all remember to be patient with ourselves as we go through these processes (learning, healing, etc.), because damn, it can be frustrating when you feel like you're "not there yet."
knowing that life can be rough at times, i think it's unfair to yourself (and others) to discount and downplay any progress you've made this year- whether if it's something that you did for the first time, or maybe you came to a new understanding and insight that you didn't have in the previous year.
it's not to say that you should undermine the validity of your experience with hardship, but to take the time to remind yourself what makes life worth living. to recall what moments were the most satisfying to you- and use it to strengthen your resolve for the next year and beyond. no amount of hardship will ever take away from the fact that you deserve to have hope that things will get better.
i hope that looking back on the year, you don't leave out the things you cherish. that you can remember the good that came this year. whether if the small victories are things like meeting someone new, trying something out for the first time, or making some strides in a long-term project/obligation...!
i wish everyone a happy new year! may it be prosperous, and that your life can move in a direction that's close to what you want out of life. you're all going to do great! remember to congratulate yourself for what you did well! despite everything, you're still here, and that's wonderful. never forget that!
#lizzy speaks#hello everyone. i know that there are *checks calendar* still 20 days left of december and 2023#but i've had a lot of strong emotions and feelings i've had to sort through as i've been thinking about how 2023 went for me#so a lot of what i've written here comes from the perspective of someone in their early 20s#it's like... a crash and burn from when you were a teenager thinking that you know everything#and realizing how big the world is and how many responsibilities there are#all while a feeling of overwhelm looms over as you try to sift your way through the world and adjust your understanding of it#for me i've definitely had an underlying thought that 'you should have your shit together by now why aren't you there yet'#and it's! not motivating! at all! to think that way. and it's made me more than ever want to be a friend to myself. to extend a patient-#kind voice to myself that reminds me that others are also trying to navigate these feelings and to accept that i'm not going to have an-#instantaneous understanding of how one goes about adulthood. and neither will they. even if they look 'put together.'#like... these people have also undergone similar stresses and along the way figured out how to navigate through that space#and personally i've found peace in knowing that there are people who are older than me. trusting that they've dealt with these things too i#some shape or form and that them living... being here.. is proof that we shall be fine in the end and that we will move past what plagues-#our mind. there's definitely been some... anger i've had this year that. school didnt teach me these things or skills!! i was so mad lol#but hey if we are little guys who are living on planet earth for the first time we shouldn't condemn ourselves to an unrealistic standard-#of going through life and being able to instantly do everything 'correctly' and know how everything works#i'm still working on improving that patience... and also trying to put in the work to understand these things.#in the midst of a very tough week for me i was tempted to say that 'nothing happened this year it was not productive'#but then i was like. that's. objectively not true if you just look at other things. also theres worth in life outside of 'productivity'#...i think i passed 20 tags at this point. but like. my favorite thing about 2023 was meeting so many cool awesome people!#who would've known that funny lil squid game could bring so many connections and friendships i cherish!#thank you so much! for being a part of my life and changing me for the better! for giving me many fond memories!#and i'm very grateful to anyone who supported me and my art this year... for sticking around even though i wished i could do more#it means the world to me knowing that there's proof that i exist and have touched someone's life in a positive way! thank you! truly!#ANYWAY. happy early new year. i hope everyone can nourish a friend in their head that extends acceptance and patience to themselves#as we try and make sense of the world together. there will be things that we don't understand yet! but one day we will! and it'll be like#wow! look how far i came! i'm okay! i'm alive! yipee! thank you for reading this post i made to get my feelings out! have a nice day!
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guzm.a and me shaking hands about being poor and eligible for welfare 🤝🤝🤝🤝
#i braved the phonecall w the bank yesterday and have sent off the form for them to fill out to supplement my application SIGH#we're making forward progress! very slowly but progress nonetheless#i am just hoping my service request doesn't expire before i finish putting everything together or else. i have to start all over again!#and the bank charges me $16.50 (cad) to get this form filled out -_- fucked up imo LOL#anyways. i've been less active bc i've been busy stressing myself sick over this stuff HFDSJGKL#and also working in the kitchen at the centre :] i've gotten . so much free food from there this week its kinda crazy#like the free lunch that i make but also a bunch of leftovers. yayyyy i dont have to buy so many groceries rn#and i get nutritious meals :] i've been working on slowly getting my nutrition levels sorted out so this is really excellent :D !!!#also obviously guz isn't real and pkmn doesnt have a welfare system but i can look at him and know he would be eligible LMAO#dandy.cmd
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I feel awful. My dad and I got into a screaming match over my dad's casual transphobia on my mom's birthday 😔 She didn't deserve that... And I don't deserve my dad saying, "Well, now you're hurting MY feelings" every time I try to explain to him why something he said/did is hurtful towards trans people.
#hearing him laugh at a transgender/gender non conforming character for simply existing sucks#especially from my perspective as his nonbinary child who came out to him 7 years ago#like... is that how he sees me and my friends?#my mom and i had a good conversation about it afterwards but like#my dad's just clocked out. won't hear any of it#i've already psychoanalyzed some formative memories of mine connected to his casual transphobia#rude jokes he made about a woman with unshaven armpits out in public and how that affected my self image and sense of worth#i still haven't worn a tank top or shorts out in public since i stopped shaving almost a decade ago#i bet my dad wouldn't even remember those comments he made#something something the axe forgets but the tree remembers#i just want my dad to educate himself at this point. to do some of the work so i don't have to#there's already so much for me to stress over. why bother with this issue that should've been resolved ages ago?#bunny babbles
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i have been swamped with schoolwork and also regular work i fear ✌️✌️
here is character from a class excercise but then i also drew more sketchies for fun bc i thought he looked cute sooo naturally i have to give him boycrush coworker
#oc art#my short king he is still like 5'9" in his big buffy werewolf form#he is strange werewolf idk… full moon will tranform him obvi but#he also transforms in high stress scenarios. for instance boycrush talking to him\#he doesn’t have any control over when#i need more short hairstyles in my repetoir cus its just like rinse and repeat the same 3 istg#waoh his proportions are really off oops we had limited time to draw 😭😭#the WSJ fan in me jumped out a little w his werewolf form its kind of damao methinks#IM WOLFING OUT 😱!!
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I fucking hate filling out government applications stop fucking asking me for shit, you've got enough fucking documents already, stop asking me for more
#I have nothing but tv static behind my eyes#It's like oh grab this grab that take a fucking photo of a form you got last year that you OBVIOUSLY still have#we're gonna need a tiny little piece of paper you forgot about immediately and don't remember where you got it from#we're gonna need more numbers than we can possibly expect any fucking human to ever keep in their brain#and some random barely-relevant information you don't even remember that no one ever wrote down because why the fuck would you#and if you take more than 45 seconds to summon this information we log you out and you have to start all over again :) Fuck you :)#Pun's text Posts#I'm taking active stress damage from form after form after form after fucking form#How the fuck do people do this shit without their tearing their eyes out
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this is so fucked they gotta stop putting death pact up for elimination like come on what am i supposed to do about this those are my GUYS. MY GUYYYYYYSSSSSS...
#im staring at this vote form and like stressing out over it#cause like i wanna vote for gaty but also i wanna vote for robot flower.#cause i dont want either of them getting out. like AT ALL.#but i also dont want black hole to leave either cause hes so important to death pact and id like to see him interact with liy more#but also i dont want fanny out either or marker simpky because theyre REALLY good#and im like.#oughhgg gg gfh idkk ifk idk#bro im taking this so seriously
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Hey girlies update time… I’ve been sent to a clinic for my weight and it’s been really stressful and my life is kinda falling apart lol there’s defiantly good aspects to it but ughhh I’m like :( bc my diets had to change so much and I feel so unproductive now and I’m really scared about gaining weight but they’d said I’d like die or whatever if I didn’t which um. I genuinely feel so disgusting heavy and sick and disgusting and DISGUSTIGN eww and my disordered eating brain is coming back in full force after silently controlling me for like nearly years at this point and it’s all so much. the hardest thing about this is that I don’t want to gain weight at all and particularly I don’t really even care to live anymore. I’m scared everyday I’ll fall deeper and deeper back into disordered eating I’ll get lonelier and lonelier I’ll get fatter and fatter I’ll lose everything I’ve ever built for myself… ugh this is a mess but ong.
#it’s hard because I don’t want to sound like I’m bragging like HEYYYY I GOT HOSPITALOZED FOR BEING A SKINNY QUEEN YASS but omg I can’t#this is so sickening I feel so fat and disgusting there were two days where I could feel like I could eat the calorie count they gave me but#now I feel like a FAT FUCKING BEKUGA WHALE I feel like I gained 40 pounds in a day I feel so hulking and disgusting I’m eating so much ew#the self harming intentions came back because I lost my only form of control over my autonomy. I feel like there’s no other way for people#to hear me other than harming myself and depriving myself#I feel like such a waste#it’s like tomorrow I want to go back restrict restrict restrict restrict eat 5 calories exercise for an hour#but I just can’t.#I don’t have anyone to talk to because no one understands.#I feel so lost#the one thing I enjoyed about the diet change is the snack kinda… it gives me motivation to keep going.#everything is so stressful though and I don’t know how to encapsulate everything AT ALL ugh#I’m so tired and I just want to fall over and die already but… idk#I want to restrict really badly. I want to purge and fast again. I want to become anorexic. I was at to scream out and cry and say that I’m#hurting and I’m weak and I can’t take it anymore#ugh#omg I haven’t made a huge tumblr rant in months omg I haven’t USED tumblr really in months omg#my ED loves tumblr like girl hey
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How does one convince an Olm that it’s okay to come out and see the light?
Introduction to the Olm: The Mysterious Cave Dweller The Olm, also known as the “human fish,” is an enigmatic amphibian that resides in the dark, underwater caves of the Dinaric Alps in Europe. With its pale, almost translucent skin and ability to thrive in complete darkness, the Olm is a fascinating creature of the deep. Its eyes are underdeveloped, a testament to its life in perpetual…
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#" is an enigmatic amphibian that resides in the dark#a testament to its life in perpetual darkness. But what if we could persuade this elusive creature to venture out and experience the light?#allowing the Olm time to adjust. Pay close attention to its behavior; if the Olm shows signs of stress or discomfort#almost translucent skin and ability to thrive in complete darkness#also known as the "human fish#and a gentle approach#and water features that mimic its natural habitat. Enrichment items that encourage exploration#but with patience#conservation organizations#encourage it to explore areas with slightly higher light levels. Create a gradient of light intensity in its habitat#even in the most extreme conditions. By embracing the challenge and celebrating each small success#gradually moving the food closer to the light. Over time#How does one convince an Olm that it’s okay to come out and see the light? Introduction to the Olm: The Mysterious Cave Dweller The Olm#it can still adapt to new conditions with the right approach. This lesson can be applied to other species and conservation efforts#it is possible. This journey is a testament to the resilience and adaptability of life#it may be necessary to adjust your approach. This could involve slowing down the rate of light increase#loss of appetite#low-light environment that it can retreat to whenever it feels the need. This ensures that the Olm does not feel trapped or stressed by the#maintain a stable#making it unnecessary to evolve beyond its current form. The lack of predators and constant conditions of the caves have made it an expert i#making sudden exposure potentially uncomfortable or even harmful. To convince an Olm to see the light#ongoing support and care are essential. Maintain a balanced environment that offers both light and darkness#or erratic behavior#providing additional hiding places#Rocks#such as exposure to light#such as increased hiding#such as tunnels and hiding spots#the Olm is a fascinating creature of the deep. Its eyes are underdeveloped#the Olm may begin to spend more time in the light
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not me coming online to this qsmp news about purgatory.... hell and war on planet earth, i hope red is the cursed team
#qsmp#fuck. PLEASE#i need things to go well overall in regards to the eggs or i will die#mr quackity i will die i will kill myself in front of u is that what u want#just joking btw#genuinely will once again step away from qsmp streams until this event is over tho#it stresses me out to watch and keep updated#of course I actually start watching qsmp properly at the start of purgatory…#no joke day one stream was like maybe my third stream to watch ever#I don’t have the attention span to watch long form video content
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