#stop BULLYING this CHILD

[hawkinsbnbg]

Today, Mike had woken up on the wrong side of his bed so he was especially vicious as he ranted about anything he found irritating about Steve.

He hadn't even reached the midpoint when Dustin decided to rip him a new one. Which, yeah, was fair because he didn't usually do Steve that dirty. But his bad mood had taken over and he found himself arguing with Dustin.

"It's not like you don't gripe about him every day," Mike retorted heatedly. "In fact, you are the one making fun of him the most out of everybody here," he gestured widely at the others (Lucas cringed, Will looked guilty, Max and Erica high-fived each other, El nodded calmly, Eddie just gave him a little wave).

"That's because I'm his brother," Dustin said matter-of-factly while adopting Steve's signature mom pose. "But who are you? You're just his ex's brother. Without Nancy, you're just a random kid to him."

(Eddie, Max, and Erica looked at each other with the same smirk. "Oh, that burns."

Lucas just sighed helplessly as Will and El watched on in amusement.)

Mike's nostril flared indignantly. He would never ever admit this, but while he thought Steve was lame and an idiot sometimes, he respected Steve plenty. Not enough to admire, but enough to fight Dustin for him.

"So what? I know him longer than you," Mike fired back. "I have more M&M's and 3 Musketeers from him than you do, I played baseball with him every weekend, and I also watched Star Wars with him."

"You do understand what ex means, right?" Dustin narrowed his eyes at him. "Nancy's his ex-girlfriend, ergo you're his ex-something, ergo you need to stop living in the past. You know why? Because I," Dustin pointed at himself smugly, "am his favorite now. I'm the present and the future. His shotgun, his house, his pool, his snack cupboard will forever be mine, thank you very much."

And just like that, all hell broke loose.

Because not even Will was willing to accept that bullshit. Steve never had a favorite, okay? As their babysitter, he wasn't allowed to.

"What the fuck are you fighting for?" Mike glared at Erica who was (impressively) making Dustin wail like Mew on the floor.

"Steve still owes me a lifetime of free ice cream, duh," she looked at him like he was an idiot. "Stop talking shit and come help me."

A wise man once said: "Enemy's enemies are friends."

So it only took Mike a second to give her a hand.

———

"Why didn't you stop them?" Steve asked in exasperation, thinking about the fistfight that would've taken place in the Wheelers' basement had he not interfered on time.

"'Cause the more they eliminate among themselves," Eddie leaned in closer and whispered conspiratorially, "the less I gotta fight to keep you."

"But I'm their babysitter," Steve pushed him away with a finger on the forehead. "And you're supposed to make it easier for me, not harder."

"Sweetheart," Eddie grabbed his wrist and nuzzled his nose into it, "Just say the word and I'll make something harder for you right now."

"You're incorrigible," Steve rolled his eyes, but his pretty smile had betrayed his mood.

"Yeah, all because of you, baby," Eddie pressed his lips on the back of Steve's hand. "O prithee, my princess, give me the remedy."

"What if I don't have any?" Steve raised his brow.

"You do, darlin'," Eddie pulled him close and cradled his face. "My tonic is right here," a kiss on his forehead. "My joys," on his eyelids. "My happiness," on his his nose and then his mouth, "my love."

Later, when they cuddled in bed, sweet and tender after loving each other til midnight, he would tell Eddie there was no need to ask for him in the first place.

Because he had been Eddie's boy since the day the battle vest was draped on him.

It seemed Steve did have a favorite, after all.

Except, it was none of his kids.

Truly a tragedy.

[willowser]

i just think katsuki is a very pinch their nose, tug on their ear, squish their cheeks, grab their whole face in his hand, hold them upside down by the ankles, put them in a headlock kind of dad.

[royalarchivist]

Pac: You know Ramon, maybe one day you can start doing farms here? I would appreciate it! And I can pay you in chocolates and diamonds, you know?

Ramon: pay me by marrying my dad

Fit: No, hey– [Stammers] Ramon! Ramon!

Bagi: YES!!! Yes, Ramon, yes!

Pac: [Laughs] Nooo, Ramon! You got me- you got me right on the spot!. Dammit! Ok... I will consider! I will consider. [...]Let's make a deal: I will do that when you become a dragon. 😉

Ramon: 😑

Fit: [Laughs] Yeah, when you become a dragon, Ramon! That sounds good to me!

[ Full Transcript ↓ ]

—

Pac: Yeah, Ramon knows about Create. You know Ramon, maybe one day you can start doing farms here? I would appreciate it! And I can pay you in chocolates and diamonds, you know?

[Fit and Bagi laugh]

Fit: That's a good reward, yeah!

Bagi: Chocolate and diamonds!

Pac: Yeah [Laughs]

Ramon: pay me by marrying my dad

Fit: No, hey– [Stammers] Ramon! Ramon!

Pac: "Pay me by marrying my dad"? Oh– [Stammers] Ramon! Ramon! Ramon!

Bagi: YES!!! Yes, Ramon, yes!

Fit: [Fit uses his chainsaw to break the sign and accidentally hits Ramon] Oh, sorry– I was trying to break the sign, I'm sorry, Ramon.

Pac: Ramon! [He does the "falls to pieces" emote]

Fit: Baby steps, Ramon! Baby steps!

Pac: Baby st– Ramon, remember–

Bagi: Yes, Ramon, yes!

Pac: [Laughs] Nooo, Ramon! You got me- you got me right on the spot!

Fit: [Laughs]

Pac: I'm gon– props- props on you, you know? It was a good– yeah. Dammit! Ok... I will consider! I will consider.

Ramon: [Nods repeatedly]

Fit: Yeah, you can't rush these things Ramon, you know? Like, it's- it's– You know? I mean– plus, you know, w– we got our own things we're working through!

Pac: [Leaning into the mic] You can't rush on love.

Fit: Yeah, exactly! Like– yeah. You know? We're working on ourselves. Yeah.

Pac: Yeah.

Fit: [Weakly] Yeah...

Ramon: [Spins in a circle wildly]

Pac: Baby steps!

Fit: Baby steps, baby steps.

Pac: One day– ok, let's make a deal: I will do that when you become a dragon.

Ramon: [Stares at the ground, resigned]

[Pac and Fit both laugh]

Fit: Oh yeah– Yeah, when you become a dragon, Ramon! That sounds good to me!

Ramon: [Tosses a potion of swiftness on them]

Pac: Woooo! Baby steps no more– I'm just kidding.

Fit: [Laughs]

[tessasbrainrotbin]

i hc that henry and michael were really close which makes this funnier i think . idk

[swervesbar]

Happy Megatron Monday! Time to bully everyone's favorite old man. Also:

[virsancte]

just straight up copying grandpa in her big girl chair, crazy

[godsworstson]

hawk and ellis bullying bam

[footballandshit]

[yumefag]

when you've liked someone for over half your life and you're still very insecure about it...

consider it a homage to this gerard donelan piece

[antiquepearlss]

Together Kiera, Catalina, and Varian have a body count.

[queenvhagar]

In the light of the hate Fabien Frankel is getting online I just wanna say Fabien everyone wants to be you or be with you and they hate how great you are at your job. They hate your swag because it's unattainable for them. Keep doing what you're doing because real fans are loving it and you <3

[fisherrprince]

oh so alisaie’s exaggerated bully behavior is 80% fanon. saying this she casually picks up a large rock

[musicalyeetreblr]

I’m not really in to class of 09

I just like putting Jeffery in bags

Like a chihuahua or smth

[usagi-zakura]

I caught the whole gang...then I took them on a picnic so they could work out their differences... they seem to get along fine!

[bugwolfsstuff]

I'm realizing that my little sister is slowly starting to relive my childhood (negative) and the opening to Think of Me Once In A While started playing and I think that just sums the feeling up

[nerosdayinanime]

sabito = dirtbike redneck. you cant convince me otherwise