#still kind of forever alone | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thelilylav · 9 months ago

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We only see each other at funerals

(On Jason, Thalia, Nico, Bianca, and their parallels/connections)

The Titan's Curse (Rick Riordan), @/anxiousmaya_, Right Now (Gracie Abrams), The Battle of the Labyrinth (Rick Riordan), Joan of Arc (Mary Gordon), The Lost Hero (Rick Riordan), Episodes Toward and Elegy for Halley's Comet (Lindsey Drager), Jason Grace (Riordan Wiki), The Gods Show Up (Michael Kinnucan), The House of Hades (Rick Riordan), What the Living Do (Marie Howe), The House of Hades (Rick Riordan), Planet of Love (Richard Siken), The Blood of Olympus (Rick Riordan), Tangerine (Nolune), The Blood of Olympus (Rick Riordan), The Blood of Olympus (Rick Riordan), I Bet On Losing Dogs (Mitski), The Burning Maze (Rick Riordan), @/abhorarchive (Twitter), The Burning Maze (Rick Riordan), Seventeen (MARINA), The Burning Maze (Rick Riordan), @/rollercoasterwords, The Tyrant's Tomb (Rick Riordan), @/the-overanalyst, Where Things Come Back (John Corey Whaley), Grit (Silas Denver Martin), Softcore (The Neighbourhood), The Tower of Nero (Rick Riordan), Frost (Mitski), @/moonbends, I'm Your Man (Mitski), Sun Bleached Flies (Ethel Cain), The Tower of Nero (Rick Riordan), Three (Sleeping At Last), My Art

#nono you don't understand it's about the siblings #it's about how thalia lost jason once only to get him back and lose him again #it's how jason and bianca both walked into their deaths with their eyes wide open #it's about zeus trying to kill nico and bianca and him doing nothing to stop jason from dying #it's about thalia being in the hunters and nico hating her but he knows how to grieve with that kind of loss #so he'll help her. for jason. for bianca. because no one deserves to mourn a sibling alone #like these four barely interact but they're soooo connected i could go on forever #i'm so sad thalia and nico never actually got a scene together after the burning maze #and ALSO #it's about the fact that reyna is one of the most (if not the most) important people left in their lives #LIKE #do you think thalia found out how close nico and reyna were and started watching her more closely #because every person the two of them have shared has ended up six feet under #so reyna gets annoyed with how protective thalia is but she doesn't stop her bc part of her can tell thalia needs it #and nico constantly checks to make sure reyna's life force is still strong #bc he never wants to be caught off guard by a death again #ok im done now i promise #the trials of apollo #trials of apollo #nico di angelo #reyna ramirez arellano #reyna avila ramirez arellano #web weaving #fanart #my art tag #thalia grace #jason grace #percy jackson #percy jackson fanart #bianca di angelo

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chrisbangs · 1 year ago

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231003 ♡ Happy Birthday Bang Chan!

#chan #bang chan #stray kids #cb97net #createskz #*gfx #*m #long post #all the stars in the sky couldnt compare to how much i love you... thank you forever and for always...#i will be by your side till the sun sets okay?#together always... im happy here with you #you changed my life and made me into a warmer person...#i think im so lucky that the universe led me to you... im so grateful that you exist here with me...#my everything... you are always my brightest sun and i hope to continue to be your moon #how many times can i say thank you till my tongue grows numb it still wouldnt be enough... to say thank you to you #because of you i am here still today... because of your kind words i was able to hold onto who i was that night #im never truly alone because you're always a part of my heart and who i am now.. you exist inside my very heart #you are so truly and deeply a soulmate to me...#i love you... so much..

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bayofwolves · 11 days ago

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Yeah I am mad about how the authors treated their sweet angel Abeke actually.

Bad things that happened to Abeke:

Mom, only person to understand her, died pre-series

Dad and sister are emotionally abusive

Tricked by her enemies and roped onto the wrong side

Distrusted by the rest of the Four and believed to be a spy

Targeted by Meilin in particular

Kidnapped by obnoxious pre-teen boys

Gets frostbite

Gets concussed

Gets stabbed

Gets captured

Gets beaten up by Meilin

Lied to and betrayed by her dearest friend

Meanwhile dad DISOWNS her

Understandable depressive episode

Makes up with dad because he apparently decided he wanted to keep treating his daughter like shit

Mauled by cougars

Loses Uraza to arch-nemesis Zerif

Another extremely understandable depressive episode

Nicknamed "hollow-girl" which tells you a lot

Almost killed by Uraza on two separate occasions

Friend* killed by Uraza

Denied proper resolution with said friend

Doesn't get to kill arch-nemesis Zerif

Doesn't get to use her Rain Dancer powers a single time

Attacked by ants

Mid bond token

Can't even keep her cat

Justice for Abeke.

#jesus himself didn't suffer so much as abeke #reading this list back like what the fuck was going on #abeke has not done a single thing wrong in her life ever #yes some of these events were necessary and furthered her as a character #but many were not. and some were downright harmful to her character growth #are we ready to talk about how the black girl was the designated punching bag of the series? (stares directly into the camera)#(to drive my point home consider how she was the only one of the four to have to bleed in order to wake the bond token spirit. lol)#and what is she given to show for it!#nothing. shitty bio family. dead boyfriend. MID BOND TOKEN.#i'd be more satisfied with it all if she got her moment to kill zerif/the wyrm and be the hero and become even more revered and glorified #in the world's eyes #but nope #zerif was the hero in the end i guess (eye twitches)#there's such little payoff for the seven hells she went through it's kind of sickening #meilin's apology to her is incredibly brief. no scene of rollan or conor apologizing.#nothing at all from her family. in fact blatant confirmation that NOTHING has changed and she's still presumably being mistreated.#not a single moment alone with redeemed shane to talk about everything. not one.#abeke my forever favourite. my dearest beloved. the authors loved to hurt you but mark my words i will give you the happiest ending of all #you will be honoured in life and your name will be remembered long after the others' have faded into obscurity #people hundreds of years into the future will form a religion around you probably. and you will be worshipped as a goddess. as you deserve #text #original erdas #spirit animals #spirit animals books #spirit animals series #abeke

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salty-an-disco · 9 months ago

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Ouugh.. having Spectre Feels

#she never got a chance #she could’ve been so many different things #but we didn’t let her #we went at her with steel-cold intent and killed her before she could be anything #now her bones are sitting on the floor #and she’s only a vaporous. transient. thing #not quite there. but still attached enough to your perception to be able to interact with you #and despite the obvious resentment. despite having reason to hate you completely and want you dead #she’s kind. she’s understanding. she’s *playful*#she already died. why waste time being mean?#when they still have the chance to do right by you?#and. seemingly. there is nothing else they can do to hurt you (right?)#so she gives you another chance #because the alternative is being alone and stuck forever in a place that never changes #and that’s a fate worse than death to her #OUUUUUGH #stp-posting #sal rambles #(in the tags. lmao. sorry)#slay the princess #the spectre

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mysticfemme · 14 days ago

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actually can't imagine someone being attracted to me um

#what kind of mental illness is this i don't want it #like am i truly destined to be alone and unloved forever #like probably but still it's a bit sad #like i feel hot sometimes but i also feel like no butch will ever find me pretty let alone attractive #delete later

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shima-draws · 1 year ago

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Binks’ Sake hits SO differently now

#The fact that they knew they were going to die.#The fact that Brook recorded their last moments together. Preserved for forever. So he can take it back to Laboon.#The fact that they kept playing. And they started to fall one by one as the poison finally took them. Until it was only Brook left. Alone.#The fact that Brook came back to life and had to bury all of his crew mates. His entire ship.#The fact that he was trapped for FIFTY YEARS on a ship that couldn’t sail properly. Stuck with the corpses of his friends.#The fact that he was so lonely and miserable and kept dreaming of his crew mates being alive.#THE FACT THAT HE’S STILL SO GOOD #HE’S STILL SUCH A GOOD PERSON. That he didn’t succumb to madness and bitterness #Compared to the Baron. Brook has suffered SO much more and yet is still so kind and giving and loyal #Actually crying my eyes out right now. I need a tissue brb lol #Shima speaks #One Piece

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deepseawave · 5 months ago

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obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog

Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️

Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D

#guys help is it time for a rebranding?? am I just gonna post about f1 now??#I still can’t believe this has all started because bestie and I were watching Ted Lasso (because I’ve been obsessed with that show for a #while now too) and I paused the episode to talk about how I really like the way Jamie interacts with kids (I’m sorry people being good with #and nice to kids is one of my weaknesses I work with kids now and have been invested in treating kids well forever)#so me saying that apparently reminded her of max and she showed me a video of him with p and yeah it was very effective in making me like #him and then we left the episode on pause and she told me a lot about f1 and max specifically cause I was interested now lmao (funny thing #is that she also got roped into it by our other friends I swear it’s speeding lmao #she also compared him to Jamie from Ted lasso (if you know you know) and showed me some heart wrenching Taylor swift edits (i haven’t #emotionally recovered yet) and yeah that’s how I started consuming way too much f1 content on YouTube and got into this whole mess lmao #oh yeah our friends also made me and another friend make a Tier list for all the drivers based on vibes alone (cause I only knew a bit about #max at that time and the other one knew nothing really) which was very funny too #especially looking back at it (we did some of them so dirty lmao 😂)#I’ve also come to the conclusion that tumblr is still one of the least annoying platforms to engage with other people (still)#YouTube is full of hate comments about drivers and stuff it’s so annoying actually #not to mention Twitter but I don’t go there and probably never will 😂#I personally don’t enjoy fics and scenarios and shipping of real people cause it makes me a bit uncomfy (not judging people who do #you do you as long as it doesn’t negatively affect anyone #but yeah I’d much rather just scroll by those here than have to look away from all the mindless hate and which driver is better discussions #everywhere else like I’m not one to engage with stuff like that but it does upset me to some #degree so yeah tumblr making memes and being rather positive about their drivers (most of what I’ve seen here of course there are gonna be #annoying people everywhere) is much more tolerable and a lot more enjoyable for me #whoops this post got away from me again oh dear #I’ve had the idea for a meme stuck in my head for days now: Max verstappen but make it if you don’t love me at my *swearing on team radio #giving spicy replies and attitude to the media maxplaining and complaining going for risky overtakes* you don’t deserve me at my *precious #interactions with p talking about his cats being a goofball with other drivers and especially danny defending other drivers driving #beautifully in the rain* it’s a package deal you can’t just pick and choose and personally I don’t even get why people complain about some #of the other stuff I appreciate someone who’s passionate and honest and genuinely kind where it matters 🤷🏻‍♀️#I think I’ve seen someone else say that but the more people complain about and criticize max the more I feel the need to defend him #god forbid women have hobbies for real (can’t believe I’ve yapped so much I can’t put more tags 💀)#also shoutout to Oscar Piastri and Danny Ric (I was so happy Oscar won even tho McLaren where being very silly in a not so funny way)

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tariah23 · 7 months ago

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Noooo…… first it’s Yuuta and Shoko, now they’re yo-yoing back around to Megumi.

#no they’re bashing megumi even more than ever now…. sometimes some characters aren’t built for all of THIS AND ITS OKAY #he’s forever traumatized bro he just lost his sister in front of his eyes and his body was the one that killed her #same situation with Gojo who took care of his sister and he from when they was toddlers and up #megumi doesn’t want to live anymore and yuuji has already tried getting through to him he’s completely broken and even if he’s saved megumi #might not ever be the same #I feel like fans keep on forgetting that these are kids going through all of this stuff that even some of the hardest adults wouldn’t be #able to handle #they bash him but a lot of these same ppl forget what happened to getou and love him unconditionally #they’d say “’well other characters have lost a lot as well and they’re still trying!’ and I just have to #restate that again; simply not every character is built like some hard boiled shounen badass jjk is not the usual shounen that a lot of #fans still refuse to see tbh like it’s kind of built different 🗿#it’s core genres are literally horror/psychological horror like no one if gonna be bouncing back like Naruto bro #and in Naruto’s case he never got to see anyone precious to him die in front of him #who knows what Naruto would’ve went through if sasuke was killed in front of him #but then again #Naruto was already a crazy ass #he vowed to kill sasuke and die with him so nvm #but megumi ISNT crazy like that that’s the difference ajsjsjsj #he’s always been one of the more rational characters amongst his peers #he’s so normal!!! everyone else is fucked up or got larger personalities than he does #maybe ppl are pissed off at the fact that megumi simply isn’t fighting back… it’s frustrating but he’s in pain bro #I don’t see him making it out alive at all either if I’m being real #Yuuji might be one of the only characters to survive at this rate I doubt Yuuta is even going to pull through after the techniques 5 min #are up either…#rambling #the point it…… as sad as it may sound all of the characters fighting so hard now are doing so because they simply have to #Sukuna is literally a calamity and these are the only characters left who will even stand any chance against such a great entity #they don’t have much of a choice man #Gojo tried to prepare his students for the future so that they’ll be strong enough to fight back anything together. not alone #Everyone is doing what they can now

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figsbass · 2 years ago

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if i could bottle any feeling in the world it would be everything i felt between the last minutes of bahumia into the transition to one big bed

#like. i relistened and like #(relistened to the song not the campaign)#i simply cannot describe how beautiful and incredible and breathtaking that campaign was #there is NOTHING like it in the world #at all #maybe ever will be #it really sort of shifted my whole worldview that 4 people alone could come together and make something so impactful and beautiful #and kind of messy and at times literally so stupid but hilarious but still heart wrenching #like. wow #the feeling of all of that settling over my skin? buzzing and warm and then cooling to the touch and melding with me forever #i will never get over it #AND THEN ONE BIG BED PLAYS #like. truly. and i mean this earnestly and honestly and without hyperbole. it was perfect #there was nothing that could have made it better #sorry guys im emotional in the tags #if you're still reading this i salute you and let's kiss #naddpod #bahumia

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livvyofthelake · 3 months ago

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completely unreasonable thing to still be annoyed by incoming. the prophecy by taylor swift harry potter edit. can you believe the fucking nerve…. like i’m killing whoever made that fr

#the song about being an adult and still feeling the loneliness of a 12 year old girl…. the song about feeling like you’re doomed forever to #be alone and long for someone anyone to be able to truly understand you… the song about craving love and attention so badly your #desperation oozes out of you like some kind of repellent self fulfilling prophecy?#and you want to edit your boyprotagonist with legions of people who love him to this song. kys #it’s beyond serious to me. that fucking guy wouldn’t understand this song even at his worst moments sorry #it’s a girl song first of all jot THAT one down. and it’s NOT for characters that have love interests.#peace on earth. whatever. who even cares #when your sleep schedule is so fucked you’re still wide awake despite having a wake up alarm set for 3 hours from now.

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simcardiac-arrested · 1 year ago

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attack for Wander of their character Eno!

#this one i super enjoyed drawing because i lauveee drawing robots. but i dont get to do it often #my ass does not have enough robo characters let alone Complicated Ones. and look yeah drawing those is hard #but it’s soooo fun. love figuring out all the details and failing and being frustrated but then having fun anyways #love u robots and love u complicated designs forever and ever #and i really liked this character. i liked the concept of a killer assassin robot still being kind especially to the little guys #it’s very neat. i just love a lot of wander’s characters in general. all the designs and concepts are very inspiring!#and their art is obviously great!!#can’t wait to draw again for them sometime #myart

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sortanonymous · 4 months ago

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Of all the NASCAR series to have the "yellow before checkered = restart" rule, they seriously have that rule in ARCA? ARCA?!?

#arca #arca menards series #arca racing #arca illinois #this kind of rule should have been abolished forever everywhere on the planet immediately after the 2022 all-star race #william sawalich #he's trying to get a perfect race and a win #that name alone deserves a perfect race!#posting before the finish btw!#UNLIMITED ATTEMPTS!?!?#EDIT: at least he still won #the dude's two months younger than me and doing great on the fourth biggest stock car circuit in america #what am i even doing with my life #i guess i should keep an eye on this guy at the milwaukee mile in trucks next sunday #it's seriously insane to me that i'm going to see someone younger than me in a national-level nascar race #i'm getting old #nascar #oh and speaking of michigan gotta love nascar weather baby!

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seafoam-taide · 5 months ago

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You know I thought for awhile that I was just a rare type of person who sure, liked people well enough but was okay being alone didn't necessarily need anyone and NO. NO. NO. OH MY GOD . YOU GIANT DUMBASS. NO HAHAHA NOOO NOPE

#tide of consciousness #See what was confusing me is usually when people talk about life partner they mean romantically sexually #And also I have yet to meet someone who gets me in the way I want someone to get me <- I think <- good chance I have and squandered it #<- that may be the evil brain talking though #But anyway so I was misconstruing the fact that the people I know and like currently are not people I want to spend my life with #With the idea that there is no one and no chance I will ever want that #And also heteronormative allo society despite my best efforts Is in my brain #And I'm only just realizing how badly I would really like to find a person or maybe people who do make me feel like. I could want that #The idea that there could be someone out there that I would want to spend my time and space with forever is mind blowing #Because honestly and this is of course the mental illness but I have kind of been under the assumption that maybe I am just like. Weeell #Evil and broken and cruel and selfish and HAHA. you know. The usual #Because you know only recently I got my first taste of 'a person is actively choosing you and wants you over all things'#And then I fucked that up because that was my first time believing anyone could care about me and you know you always fuck that one up #And that sucked and is still in the process of sucking but it has also made me realize #That there is actually a way that I would want that. Maybe #Like in a way that worked. I'd really like to have a person like that maybe #And honestly that's a nightmare to have to realize #Because before it was like hey! I guess I just don't have to worry about that!#And now I'm like FUCK. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THIS #because special secret I've never actively tried to connect to people in my life ever #I don't know how you do that! I don't know how to actively form relationships!#I just wait for someone to grab me and pull me along! It's terrifying to think about trying to discover that #AT 20!#I know it's not unusual especially in this day and age in fact it's kind of an epidemic #But you're supposed to learn how to socialize when you're a little tiny baby!!! I don't want to figure this out now I can't even get a job!#Fucking shit that's a lot of words um #Every 6 months I remember that I'm deeply deeply deeply lonely and it's the worst and then I wilfully ignore it until I rediscover it again #Every day I discover a new layer to how utterly wretchedly self loathing my brain is and its the worst #Peeling back a layer of paint and surprise! You've subconsciously thought you were fine being alone because secretly you believe #That it is impossible for you to be anything but alone! Yay!

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phagodyke · 11 months ago

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everyone say thank u to my roommate for going to visit her parents this weekend so I can jack it loud and nasty 🙏

#i love her but there are some benefits to having the flat to myself.... love getting to wander around in just my boxers + a tshirt too #things i could do while she was still here if i wasnt a pussy 🙄#jk itd just make her uncomfortable and im too respectful for that #having a lowkey crush on her is an endless comedy to me bc we would be so woefully incompatible romantically #and also sexually.. historically ive only ever stone topped bc ive never been comfortable enough w anyone to let them fuck me #despite very much Not being stone or exclusively a top. and i think shes some form of sex repulsed anyway so like. sits there dead silence #and also shes so in love with her other friends and i showed up late to that party.... ive been feeling kinda guilty lately bc ik-#she misses them a lot and wishes we'd be able to stay roommates w them too. and im a pretty poor replacement for them tbh #and i love spending time with her but whenever i do i feel kinda painfully aware im not them like i could never fill that space #and asking to hang out more with her always feels like im taking away from time she could be talking to them. or even being alone ik she-#likes her own company and i get that a lot too so its chill but ahh.. man #i dont mean this in a bitter or jealous way at all like theyre all such sweet ppl i couldnt ever hold it against them #theyre kind of a 3 headed cerberus type situation and im like. the stray puppy they found on the side of the road #theres nothing they can do differently i was just born to be alienated from other ppl forever until i die. and someday i hope ill-#finally get used to it and accept i wont ever feel like im enough for anyone else or feel like anything else is enough for me #old wounds healed over 5082 times that still hurt to touch but i cant help pressing my fingers into them anyway bc its a familiar pain etc #anyway lost where i was going with this its just been on my mind again recently. i hate to be pitied i hate to feel like im only included-#bc they didnt want me to feel left out i hate feeling like a shoddy secondhand stand-in and its been a lot of that lately #also been a little annoyed bc sometimes it feels like shes trying to micromanage my social life and girl. we're not close enough for that #im sure its well intentioned but im not part of what they have going on i cant compete in that ring so dont try to push me into it..#ahhh. its all ok tho one of the guys is coming to visit next month which will be rly fun but ill try to give them some space too #its good at least im doing this processing now bc group situations can be spike traps of triggers for me sometimes #regardless of how good friends i am w ppl and ive already had a wobble a few weeks ago w how i cope and i dont want it to become a #fully fledged regular issue again bc its so hard to crawl back out of that pit. anyway losing coherence here im gonna stop rambling #and go make myself an early dinner and then back to drawing........#sorry for long tags if ur reading this blows u a kiss but go find a better use of ur time girl!!#.diaries

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tearlessrain · 1 year ago

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okay the way gods/the afterlife are handled in forgotten realms lore is bleak as fuck. like. the mortal realm basically being a prayer-powered generator and source of fodder for the gods to throw at each other in their constant conflicts and if you don't like that and refuse to participate, fuck you you're Going In The Wall. they may or may not be interested in helping you but you're still gonna have to pick one to grovel at if you don't want to spend your afterlife getting Pink Floyd-ed into oblivion and/or shanghaid into being a demon.

like. what the fuck. this is a dystopia and even dying won't get you out of it.

#the wall thing has always bothered me idk #granted a lot of this is due to the fact that I happen to really like making godless characters/characters who have beef with the gods #because I have the usual combination of religious trauma and daddy issues one might expect of a queer millennial #so being cornered into worshiping a deity no matter how you might feel about getting involved in the gods' constant bullshit #under threat of Wall Time Forever Because Fuck You #just inspires a kind of suffocating hopelessness to me #don't take this seriously I am talking out of my ass #I know the gods need prayer to survive and all that but like #considering they keep everything running I feel like that alone should be enough incentive for them to retain plenty of worshippers??#I just feel like the alignment afterlife being such a threat to them only works in a universe #where either the existence of the gods is ambiguous or the universe can function fine without them #as things are there are still a lot of reasons why *most* people would revere the gods anyway #I just think you can afford to let a few of em off #also if there are enough to make a city wall out of them then the wall obviously isn't working as a motivator anyway #there's no reason to keep it up at this point other than being petty assholes

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icouldbeyourprettygirl · 7 months ago

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I sent him a TikTok today related to videos he shows in class. He responded to the video, then sent me his TikTok account "so it's easier to share videos with each other". It felt kind of weird that he didn't ask, he just sent it? I didn't know how to say no, so I followed him, and he immediately followed me back. I looked to see if I could find his wife's account on there (I'd hate to cause a fight/issues, so I thought it might make things even) and wasn't able to.

This is making me feel weird 😕

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