#star wars baby mobile

[alberta-sunrise]

Back in my fave jeans ♥️

[lusquefusque]

THE MANDALORIAN

wherever i go, he goes.

[galactic-rhea]

The Midi-chlorian essay only a few asked

(or, How Is Anakin Skywalker a walking biological horror)

So I made this post and a few were actually interested, also i needed to write down all of this or I wouldn't be able to sleep.

The way I went just from "hahaha they're just mitochondria before becoming forced symbionts and losing all autonomy" to the Medical Horror that would be Anakin Skywalker .

Let me explain, going from this theory, let me tell you that the average mammal cell can have between 800 to 2000 mitochondria. In Star Wars we're told that the average living being, has 2500 midi-chlorians per cell. The difference isn't that big, so we can assume that mid-chlorians are smaller than our real-life mitochondria, and it would make sense since the mitochondria have the best possible living conditions, whereas midi-chlorians, if they're free-life bacteria (as in, they aren't forced to live in the cells of another being) it would make sense if they're just smaller, let's say, sneaky, to increment their chances at living.

So Midi-chlroains don't just produce ATP, Force sensitives have a minimum of 4000-5000 midi-chlorians per cell. That's...a big number, but not very horrific. See, the amount of mitochondria is related to how much energy the organic tissue requires. The cells of muscular tissue and neurons are the ones with the highest mitochondria count. Also the mitochondria in the neurons are mobile and flexible, because just thinking burns ATP.

We can assume that using The Force burns insane amounts of ATP, so I assume it makes sense for Force Sensitives to have big amounts of Midi-chlorians. But! The problem with this is that we're told that the Midi-chlorians are attracted to the force, not born within it. But any multicelullar organism (with a few exceptions) need the mitochondria. Mitochondria have their own ADN, and they're always inherited from the mother, so we can assume that there's two different types of midi-chlorians: The ones any normal being borns with, and the ones that get attracted because of the baby's force potential. Either that, or both the mithocondria and the midi-chlorians exist simultaneously.

Which means that Jedi (or anyone who wants to know, really) would need to take several blood tests for midi-chlorians count. Because a newborns midi-chlorian count wouldn't be the same through a babie's infancy. UNLESS...The midi-chlorian infection (yes, i'm calling it that) ocurrs already since the pregnancy, if the force is strong enough for a fetus to be a possible force sensitive in the future, then I guess the midi-chlorians would get attracted to the parent during the pregnancy as well.

WHICH BTW, IT FITS WITH PADMÉ BECOMING FORCE SENSITIVE, at least for a while, like the discarded ROTS concepts. But also, would mean, that poor Shmi became a hella strong force-sensitive person as well, at least for a while.

And it would be a biological advantage if we take this route, because it would possibly make the pregnant being stronger and with a higher supply of energy.

It also explains why the jedi would only take a single blood test when the force sensitive is just a baby, because the infection is already settled. It can also be argued, that any baby born with a fairly high amount of midi-chlorians (like the 4000 per cell count minimum) would only increase, if only slightly, as the force sensitive grows because the midi-chlorians will get attracted regardless.

There must be a limit, or more like, a balance, that the midi-chlorian and the force potential of the individual met. As in, there's just enough force within the individual for a certain number of midi-chlorian, and all of this is probably decided already during the fetus formation or very early on the baby's life.

Now, Anakin...would be an abomination. Because his cells are so full of midi-chlorians, that it's scary to think how the cells aren't exploding or downright giving malfunctions to the rest of the cellular organelles.

If we go by the route of "midi-chlorians start infecting the force sensitive host mother during pregnancy" it means there were high chances of a misscarriage or an incompatibility between Shmi and Anakin, because holy cow, Anakin is just too much.

But you know what also, it could potentially mean? That Padmé's pregnancy was a risky one, fron the start -slowly nods-. Luke and Leia's force potential was lower than Anakin's, but there's still a lot to unpack there in terms of compatibility. We are never given the exact count of midichlorian count for the twins, but let's pretend it was low enough for Padmé to not inmediatly have a miscarriage. That, and also, maybe, Padmé isn't strong in the force to manipulate it, but maybe just close enough for the pregnancy to be carried to term, let's say, her midi-chlorian count is 3900, close enough.

Something similar with Shmi, I'm taking for granted that she also had a difficult and risky pregnancy (on top of it being a pregnancy she had no agency). It becomes worse because, unlike the twins, Anakin is just...50% human. The only possible genes Anakin has are from Shmi. So he's probably...genetically, almost a clone of Shmi but with a massive infection of Midi-chlorians (yes, this implies that Anakin has homogametic sex chromosomes, aka XX, there's no other possible explanation because he literally only has Shmi's genes to work with!).

But he's Space Jesus, though,so let's pretend that the "no father genes" helped with this and allowed Anakin to grow into a...normal-ish baby despite it all.

Midi-chlorians must be extremelly small, closer to the size of a virus in this case, viruses vary on size and the way they infect the cells is by hijacking the nucleus, which then can produce more viruses instead of its own proteins. This can vary anywhere between a production of 50.000 to 100.000 viruses produced by infected cells.

Which, btw, still fits somewhat with the mitochondria theory, because mitochondrias are believed to have been from a genus of bacteria called Rickettsia, which used to be believed to be the in-between of Viruses and Bacteria due their small size and extreme endosymbiotism.

Still, we aren't even told how many midi-chlorians Anakin had, just that it was over 20.000 and thus the chart couldn't even register it. Even if we're just counting 21.000 midi-chlorians per cell, that's...a lot. Even if the relationship is symbiotic and positive in nature, that's excessive, an infected cell will usually die faster. So Anakin's cellular death must be on record time.

The life span of a cell varies highly depending of the type of cells, white cells can live about 2 days, others about 5, and then there's others that live about 6 years in average.

Forget all of that, Anakin's cells die anywhere between a few hours and a week. Which also means a super fast regeneration and healing (Hey! that tracks, that's how he didn't die even though he should have, on several ocassions).

But that's not the only problem here, the production of energy is strong with this one, too strong. Again this should make the cells burst due too much ATP because of an increase on osmotic pressure. Anakin is producing so much damn ATP (which we can assume it becomes glycogen stored in muscles and fat tissue) his need to be active and just doing something skyrockets, he might as well be the equivalent of being high on meth since birth.

The accelerated cellular formation and death, gives me the horrific idea that Anakin was probably one of these babies that are born premature, but also that he probably was bron with, idk, teeth and already lots of hair. Maybe that's also why he got so tall of all sudden, lots of cellular grow, huh.

Anakin seems to age normally by what are we given by canon. So despite it all, his life-span or aging doesn't seem to be compromised, this is probably because of how strong he is with the Force. In the sense that...he needs the midi-chlorians to handle this much power, but he also needs the force to handle with that many midi-chlorians, otherwise he would have been already born dead.

See, ageing has a lot to do with stem cells. Anakin's stem cells need to be highly prolific and potent to keep cellular division happening at such a high rate, we can infer that any force sensitive has potent stem cells, so the force must inherently affect stem cells. So Anakin's stem cells must be monstruosities in efficiency. If Anakin donated stem cells to someone else, that person would either have a strong inhumne reaction against them or they would get some of the worst cancer ever seen. Again I'm no expert, but the fact Anakin doesn't develop cancer at all as soon as he was born is already impressive. The rate in which Anakin's cells die must be ridiculous, even has a baby, he must have required tons of energy and endure lots of stress which...tracks. The fact he gets electroshocked, burned, gravely wounded or whatever every week or so, must help him to no develop some cancer, which is a bit funny.

But it would also mean he can go long periods of time without eating or resting like...a normal human. Not saying that he doesn't need it, though, but his neural activity and use of the force must be high at all times to burn out that much energy. Theoretically, the production of glycose and glycogen helps him through long periods without sleep or food so he doesn't get long-term damage, or at the very least the ability to keep going, like I said, maybe is like being on drugs all the time; there's still the need to sleep and eat, but he can push his body to keep surviving beyond what's considered normal without having long-term damage. (Don't get happy, this isn't taking into account all of the stuff that happens to him, lol)

The balance between burning too much energy and not burning enough must be insane as well. As Vader, a lot of this probably watered down because all of his energy must be saved for...you know, surviving all the torture. But as a young teen/man amist war? Oh boy.

I'm not an expert, but I'm theorizing that putting Anakin in an induced sleeep must be...fricking hard. Painkillers that work on him? fricking hard. Anesthesia? Probably the same used for big animals, he must be insane and awful for a doctor to work with! Just imagine it, he probably gets injured in such a way that would have anyone else fall unconscious, but Anakin remains awake and with tremendous amounts of adrenaline triggered by a stress response sustented by the extreme amounts of energy that the midichlorians produce.

When it happens in the central nervious system, excess of ATP can produce neuronal dysfunction. In fact, many degenerative mental illnesses have a lot to do with a malfunction of the mitochondrias. There's a corelation also with neurodivergency sometimes, like autism or ADHD. I will leave it there.

And with all of this...I also conclude that Anakin, on general basis, doesn't like sugary things and doesn't even rationalize why, but is because he has already enough glycose. Having something sugary probably gives him a headache.

God what has Star Wars done to me.

[fxirytxlcfxtc]

descended-from-fairytales​:

She appreciates the help, eagerly melting into the cuddles once she gets to the floor. She curls into Daniel, holding onto him tightly, laying more on top of him.

Waylon follows shortly after, cumming with a groan, his eyes rolling back, his hips stuttering and stilling. He pants and pulls away slightly to sit back on the couch. Looking over at his three on the floor, there’s a hint of a soft smile and a chuckle.

Hemlock melts into his touch, smiling softly against his lips. She reaches out to pull him the rest of the way onto the floor with her.

she pulls Sadie in more, holding onto both of them. Tired, so very tired. Needs to rest, but just wants to be held more than anything.

the slut curls into him, melting into his touch, humming lightly at his hand in her hair.

the doll shudders, happily laying there, eyes crossed, tongue hanging out of her mouth, thoroughly fucked and pleased. snuggles, please? she thinks it's done, they're done now, right? if they're done, the doll wants her snuggles. she was so good. right?

Fitz stumbles slightly and comes down with her, smiling and pulling her in close.

cuddles. warm. missing one? whine. pout. reaching blindly. cuddles. time for cuddles.

Navin kisses the side of her head, holding her close to him.

[its-the-allure]

My year in review

Can't remember who tagged me, but thank you! I joined fandom in late 2023 and started writing just this year, so this is very resident for me. So grateful to be here, and so grateful to all the amazing folks I have collabed with, alpha/beta/cheergirled for and had A/B/C for me! It's the best. You are the best. ILY.

Hot Boy Summer

Explicit | 3.3k words

Art collab with @ree-dee-art, Gift for @edieblakee

Summary: A surprise visitor leads to more than Harry was expecting.

lost for you i am so lost

Explicit | 758 words

Gift for my first fandom bestie @phoenixortheflame, seven deadly sins challenge for DCC Monthly Microcreations

Summary: Harry didn’t sleep well, and often came to bed late. Draco never minded being woken like this.

Worshipping at the altar of Harry James Potter

Explicit | 2.4k words

Inspired by art by @itsphantasmagoria, Gift for Harry's birthday!

Summary: “You had mentioned you were interested in adding a little play,” Draco said to Harry. “I thought you might enjoy giving it a go today, to celebrate your birthday.”

Down and (nearly) out

Explicit | 6.6k words

Art collab with an anon friend, Gift for my bestie @kamaela

Summary: A story told over several evenings out, during which Harry Potter rapidly becomes obsessed with Draco Malfoy for a whole new reason. In his defense, everyone loves a crop top.

Eyeliner!Harry, Part 1 of The Eyeliner Chronicles

Explicit | 3.5k words

Art collab with @itsphantasmagoria, gift for my bestie @jelliewrites

Summary: Draco Malfoy returns to a mandatory eighth year at Hogwarts with a massive crush on Harry Potter. Harry has returned wearing eyeliner and black nail polish. Draco never thought he’d be into this look on a man, but has to admit, it’s working for Potter. It’s also working for Draco.

Magie Noire

Pansmione | Mature | 7.2k words

Art collab with an anon pal, Gift for @sleepstxtic

Summary: Pansy is checking email on her mobile when another witch gets into the lift. Their eyes meet, Pansy’s shock mirrored on the face of Hermione Granger. Pansy’s wand slips from her sleeve without a thought, and suddenly she’s gripping it tightly, her heart hammering. “Hello, Granger. What are you doing in Paris?” Or, the time Pansy and Hermione keep running into each other. Mischief follows.

[podfic] The Scariest Witch by sweaters_in_the_summer

Gen | 0-10 min

My first podfic! Collab with @sweatersinthesummer (who wrote!), get outside your comfort zone challenge for DCC Monthly Microcreations

Summary: Harry and Draco celebrate their first Halloween together with Harry’s babies.

Come As You Are

Explicit | 35k words

My first anon fest submission! For @hd-fan-fair. And my longest fic to date. Collab with the amazing and wonderful and supremely talented @itsphantasmagoria

Summary: When Harry Potter visits a sexy internet chatroom site, he does so with the hope of answering a niggling question: Am I interested in men? He finds more than he anticipated when he stumbles upon a free strip show starring a very familiar person. Just what is Draco Malfoy doing on a Muggle pay-per-view site? And when did he get so fucking fit?

[ART] HJP is the sun

A gift for the amazing peu_a_peu, for the HP Fuck You Fest

Summary: A truly terrible comic, made with the utmost love and respect. Inspired by peu_a_peu’s The Sun (chapter 4 of the legendary Crack This Thing Wide Open).

Cease and Desist

Explicit | 1.2k words

A gift for @saijordison, inspired by his art, for the HP Fuck You Fest

Summary: After the war Draco makes a fortune selling Potter fan merch, and Harry Potter wants to shut it down. He sends a cease-and-desist letter. What's Draco to do but show up to court wearing their bestselling "Future Mrs. Potter" jumper?

Little Black Dress, Part 2 of The Eyeliner Chronicles

Explicit | 4.9k words

Art collab with @itsphantasmagoria, Gift for @tessacrowley, for the @hd-tarot fest

Summary: Returning for a mandatory eighth year and secretly dating Harry Potter, Draco is a bit of a mess. Harry wants to go public with their relationship, but the last thing Draco needs is another reason for people to hate him. As they work on their Tarot assignment for Advanced Divination, could a change of heart be in the cards?

Oroboros

Mature | 558 words

Gift for @thisbloodycat, for the DCC Holiday Exchange

Summary: Through eight years at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy cannot keep his eyes off Harry Potter.

Leather Cheerio

Explicit | 2.2k words

Gift for @itsphantasmagoria, for HP Fuck You Fest

Summary: I hate writing summaries. Just fucking read it. 😈

Or, when Allure wrote crack smut for Phanta's birthday, using the worst words from the Lewd Vocabulary in Erotic Fiction survey results.

Sweet like candy to my soul

Explicit | 9.2k words

Gift for @mintyelbows, for @hp-soulmates-secret-santa

Summary: Harry and Draco are the only eighth year students who have stayed over at Hogwarts for the winter holidays. The first day of their break, Harry sends a note asking Draco to join him in his rooms. What could Harry want? A deeply pining Draco can’t wait to find out.

Tagging @kamaela @dodgerkedavra @itsphantasmagoria @sweatersinthesummer @cailynwrites @phoenixortheflame @jelliewrites @smehur @sleepstxtic @pl0tty @fastbrother @faiell @drwhoisginnyholmes @thusspoketrish and everyone else who sees this and wants to! Let's celebrate!!!

[detydia]

Imagine Dean Winchester x You

You and Dean decorate the Bunker for Christmas.

The holiday season had arrived, and with it came the annual tradition of decorating the Bunker for Christmas. You and Dean, despite your usual banter and occasional disagreements, found yourselves immersed in the festive spirit as you unpacked boxes of ornaments, lights, and a rather questionable-looking Santa hat.

Dean eyed the Santa hat with skepticism. "Are you seriously gonna make me wear this thing again?"

You laughed, holding it out to him. "Come on, Dean, it's tradition! Besides, you make a pretty convincing Santa."

He sighed but took the hat anyway, placing it on his head with a mockingly serious expression. "Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas, I guess."

As you began untangling strings of lights, your eyes gleamed mischievously. "You know, the lights would look great on the Impala. It could be our very own Christmas-mobile."

Dean shot you a glare. "Don't you dare touch Baby with those lights. She's not a Christmas tree on wheels."

You chuckled, draping a strand of lights over your shoulders like a festive boa. "Just trying to spread some holiday cheer, Dean."

The banter continued as you moved through the Bunker, adorning it with twinkling lights and festive decorations. You had a penchant for unconventional ornament placements, and Dean couldn't help but roll his eyes as he discovered a miniature reindeer hanging from a weapon rack.

"Really, Y/N? A reindeer on the arsenal? Very festive," he teased.

You grinned, unfazed. "It's a guard reindeer. Gotta keep the holiday spirit safe, you know."

As you tackled the tree, Dean found himself in a battle of tinsel with you. You playfully draped it around each other, engaging in a tug-of-war that resulted in laughter echoing through the Bunker.

"You're gonna turn me into a Christmas tree at this rate," Dean quipped, trying to extricate himself from the tinsel web.

You smirked. "You'd make a fabulous Christmas tree, Dean. Just imagine the presents under those rugged branches."

The decorating took a turn for the competitive as you argued over the placement of the star atop the tree. Dean insisted on precision, while you favored a more carefree approach.

"It's not straight," Dean grumbled, adjusting the star for the tenth time.

You pouted. "Who cares about straight? It's a star, not a math problem."

The playful bickering escalated as you continued to deck the halls. Dean discovered a stash of mistletoe and couldn't resist holding it above your head.

"Looks like we're caught under the mistletoe, Y/N. Tradition dictates you owe me a kiss."

You rolled your eyes. "You just want an excuse to get kissed, Winchester."

Dean grinned. "Guilty as charged."

///As you stood back to admire the handiwork, you bumped Dean's shoulder. "Not bad, Winchester. We make a pretty good decorating team."

He smirked. "Well, I do have an eye for detail."

"Detail and stubbornness," you added with a playful wink.

[blindbeta]

hi! i'm currently writing a blind character in a futuristic sci-fi setting (think fifth element). some backstory just so there's additional context: she's orphaned as a baby, and while very young, contracts a virus that leaves her with minimal light and shadow perception. she later gets adopted, and her father acts as her guide until she's 12. when she turns 12, she's gifted a droid who acts as her mobility aid (visually, her droid is similar in design/size of r2-d2 from star wars). i thought this fit the futuristic setting. here's my question. originally, i had her (let's call her C) commission a special pair of glasses that connect to her droid so it can see what she sees and better help it guide her in public spaces, especially if it's too loud for her to hear it or if they get separated somehow, because the glasses have an auditory link for them to communicate with each other. after doing more research, i've learned that the "blind character covering their eyes" trope is super common and kind of looked down upon in the blind community. i'm really worried now, as someone sighted, that i've fallen for it by designing C's mobility aid this way. have i? and if i have, what is some advice or tips for ways i could alter this to where it doesn't come across as trope-y? should i get rid of the glasses, scrap the droid idea completely, etc?

Guide Droid And Character Covering Her Eyes With Glasses

The glasses remind me a bit of the OrCam My Eye, which is a pair glasses and an ear piece. You have an already-existing precedent for this. Additionally, my main concern with covering eyes, which I discuss here, [link], is that there is often no thought or explanation behind why a character’s eyes must be covered. Narratives often twist themselves into knots simply to cover a blind person’s eyes with something like sunglasses or a blindfold, which the character never removes.

Regular glasses are, however, a different story. Regular glasses are transparent. They are usually for protection of the eyes. They may also make objects slightly clearer, which can reduce eye strain. Not that your character will need to worry about that.

The glasses are not able to correct vision. They serve a purpose, and one that isn’t covering the person’s eyes.

My suggestion is to provide an explanation for the glasses and make sure they are see-through. They shouldn’t be sunglasses unless she has transition lenses, which can protect her from damaging UV rays.

The key is not to cover up your character’s eyes. Especially for no particular reason.

However, if you are worried about the glasses, you can also simply have bone-conducting ear piece that sits on top of her ear. Avoid implants or anything that might disrupt her hearing or other senses.

The Guide Droid

Speaking of senses, having a droid as her guide means she will miss out on a lot of tactile information provided by a cane and, to a lesser extent, a guide dog. For example, a handler can feel elevation.

Walking behind a droid is not going to provide that same information.

Yes, there is a step down, but where? Is it an even step or does it curve? Are the steps the same width?

I suggest giving her a cane, as they can be used with sighted guide and to a lesser degree, service animals. Her using a cane won’t interfere with a droid the same way it might with a guide dog or horse.

Alternatively, you can also find a way to connect them so she can get tactile information. Another, cuter option might be a droid service animal with a more futuristic harness.

About Using Sighted Guide Until She is 12

Something about this bothers me.

Sighted guide is a legitimate form of O&M and can increase independence in a way only blind folks can relate to. I also know that sighted guide may be more encouraged in some cultures that value interdependence. Sighted guide is a great and should be used more in fiction. I personally prefer it in unfamiliar areas and at night time.

However, it also feels off to me that she so happens to use a human guide all her life and not a cane. It may be because I am imagining times where her father may not be able to accompany her. Or perhaps I am sensitive to the lack of mobility aids in fiction that feature blind characters.

Lastly, cane skills are a part of O&M, which is needed before being able to work properly with a guide animal. I think she should have at least some cane skills and some navigation techniques even if she prefers to have her father guide her. This also gives her more agency to experiment and choose what is comfortable for her.

Here is a post I made about mobility aids that might help.

I hope this helps.

[thunderheadfred]

My dad can’t do much babysitting, mostly for mobility reasons, but he’s been trying to help out some mornings, now that partner is back to work. Here he is with baby, watching Star Wars cartoons while I do chores.

It’s kinda like having two kids, because he’s not able to take much off my plate and he needs a lot of encouragement. While pregnant I swear I had prescient visions about that, so I’m trying to enable bonding as much as possible. These two should be besties.

While he kept her occupied, I was able to pump twice and finally hang up artwork in the baby room/office.

[novankenn]

"Jaune Gets A Gun AU - Day 2" Star Wars - Stormtroopers (Various)

Inspired by @howlingday's RU-JA-GUN-CON

Ruby and Pyrrha rushed to catch up to Tiny Tina as she dragged Jaune towards on of the booths when she suddenly stopped.

Tiny Tina: (Points to a dfiierent booth) Ohhhhhhhh.

Jaune: (Turns to see what Tina was pointing at) Tina?

Tiny Tina: Let's try THAT one!

Before Jaune, Ruby or Pyrrha could object she Tiny Tina yanks Jaune in away from the orginal booth.

????/???? : Hey! Come back!

The quartet closes on their new destination rather quickly, but as they do Ruby and Tiny Tina start to question the decision, only for Jaune to take the lead.

????: How may I help you?

Jaune: We're interested in seeing what your booth has to offer, if that's not an issue.

ST Commander: You're not Republic Loyalists, are you?

Jaune and his friends take a step back as several more white armoured personnel step out from behind a curtain at the back of the rather large booth.

Ruby: Republic? Never heard of it.

ST Commander: Excellent! So you're interested in joining the Imperial Army, I take it?

Pyrrha/Ruby: NO!

ST Commander: Really? Can I ask why?

Jaune: (Rubbing the back of his neck) Well... um...

ST Commander: (The armoured figure waves his hand in the direction of a well laid out display) Because WE do have a large selection of equipment that is issued to our members... free of charge.

Jaune/Ruby/Tiny Tina: That's a lot of guns.

ST Commander: That is but a small selection of what is available to our recruits. We also have this!

Ruby/Tiny Tina: Ohhhh... wow!

Jaune: That's given to new recruits?

ST Commander: After taking a mandatory training course.

Pyrrha: Ah Jaune?

Jaune: Yes Pyr?

Pyrrha: Aren't you already ENLISTED, Jaune?

ST Commander: Is that true?

Jaune: (Rubbing the back of his neck) Well, yeah, it is.

Ruby and Tiny Tina approach the display case, as the armoured figure, Pyrrha and Jaune continue thier discussion.

ST Commander: May I inquire with whom?

Jaune: United Federation's Mobile Infantry. Heard of them?

ST Commander: Sounds familiar.

Ruby/Tiny Tina: Hey, I know these guns!

Jaune/Pyrrha: You do?

Tiny Tina: (Eyes the commander) What, I think I remember you guys as well... the Imperial Army...

Ruby: I do too! There was an article about them in "Strike Forces Monthly"... you guys can't shoot worth shi...

Jaune: Swear Jar!

ST Commander: Lies and slander!

Tiny Tina: I read that article. Massive arsenal of good weapons, decent armour, probably one of the largest military forces just behind the Imperium of Man... but totally unable to hit the broadside of a barn.

ST Commander: (Flustered and embarrassed noises)

Pyrrha: (Looks at the commander with a disapproving look) Is that true?

ST Commander: No! Preposterous! Not based on any facts at all!

ST Commander: Why are you grinning like that?

Tiny Tina: (Pulls something from behind her back that looks suspiciously like a bomb) Just a little test... this is a confetti bomb, totally harmless.

Jaune/Pyrrha: Tina?

Ruby: So have those two sitting on the bike looking things, take three shots... they hit it... we apologize.

ST Commander : (Sweating, though no one can tell) And if they don't?

Ruby/Tiny Tina: We fu...

Jaune: Swear Jar!

Ruby: Ahem... we bid you a civil goodbye, and check out some other booths. Deal?

St Commander: (Sighing) Deal.

Tiny Tina: (As she sets the bomb fifteen feet from the two troopers) Alright, baby! Shut your face and shoot something!

Pyrrha: Oh my! That's pathetic!

ST Commander: It's not our fault! It's these helmets!

Ruby: It's a poor soldier that blames their equipment. Maybe next time?

The quartet watches as the whole squad of armour troopers drop their heads and shoulders in utter defeat.

Jaune: So, where to now?

(So Star Wars won the Poll with 34.1% of the vote. Next up, a long awaited request... Warhammer 40K and then back to the poll! Hope you enjoyed)

[idontknowreallywhy]

Estera - Ch 16 - Distraction

Developments develop. John lives to regret his eldest brother befriending his AI daughter. But can bagels ever be bad?

TW for sickness. This remains the only part of this entire story that could be viewed as a self-insert as I drafted it in my head when I too was curled up on the bathroom floor… Estera is much braver than I was though.

Apologies if these are coming somewhat thick and fast… figured I’d get as much as I can posted while the muse cooperates and before something shiny breaks the current hyper-fixation I have on this story 😏

(Previous… Prologue - Stars are Only Visible in Darkness, Estera - 1 - Colour, 2 - Dinosaur, 3 - Shoes, 4 - Thunderbird, 5 - Lesson, 6 - Safe, 7 - Gull, 8 - Deliver, 9 - Coffee, 10 - Flight, 11 - Run, 12 - Fall, 13 - Trying, 14 - Hide, 15 - Wait)

(Sofasurf’s Recrudescence which is the foundation for all of this)

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Slumped in the corner of the bathroom, cold sweat prickling from every pore she pressed her face against the coolness of the tiles and willed away the nausea.

She did NOT. Have. Time. For. This.

It was obviously an occupational hazard of spending every working day with small children, but she often seemed to dodge the viruses that took down her colleagues and had always been secretly pleased by the fact she was able to invincibly swoop in and cover for them when required. Pride before a fall.

It was particularly embarrassing as she’d been back at work a mere 3 days after so much time off. Just tomorrow and Friday left before the holidays… she COULDN’T call in sick it was just too ridiculous. Somehow she had to power through.

This particular bug seemed determined not to be ignored, however. Another wave of sickness hit and left her curled in a tight ball, sobbing into her best quality bath towel.

Too much self pity, Estera, need to think of something else…

Her feverish mind supplied only Baby Shark on loop.

Which didn’t really help.

Groaning in frustration she reached for her mobile phone, maybe she could find distraction of some kind online. Not that anyone she knew was likely to be awake at this time.

Oh, there was just one, according to the little green dot next to the word Blue.

As always her brain warred with itself - the anticipation of the warm, safe feeling their silly little exchanges always brought versus the sharp bite of guilt that demanded to know why she had any kind of right to his time or attention after what she had done. After the pain she’d caused him.

The nausea rolled by again, threatening to drag her into despair. She gritted her teeth. Desperate times… maybe he wouldn’t mind sharing another daft joke or something…

Hi, you’re up late?

Hey there 😀 no it’s mid-afternoon here ☀️

Oh! Sorry, I actually have no idea where you live and shouldn’t have assumed.

Not a problem, we tend to keep it quiet for security so I wouldn’t have mentioned where we are.

You ARE up late though? Everything alright?

Well she should have seen that coming. Fever made her honest. Or at least had eliminated her ability to formulate a plausible lie.

“Just a bit of a sickness bug, caught it from the kids.”

Ugh, that’s the worst. You want company? I can be there in half an hour?

She blinked. He was joking, surely?

Ha, err no I’m good thanks. That’s pretty fast though!

Told you One was the best Thunderbird 😉

She laughed out loud at the reference to the passionate debate in the cave. Which triggered another bout of unpleasantness. She lay on the floor for a while waiting for her head to stop pounding.

A soft ping made her open her eyes again.

You ok?

Sorry, yes. Just… well, you know.

Don’t apologise. Just wish I could help.

I could do with some distraction.

Want to hear about how our pool got filled with jello?

You have a pool? 😲

And yes please

WELL

It started (as it often does) with Gordon (2nd youngest) winding up Alan (youngest)

I never figured out precisely what it was about but that rarely matters…

She focussed on allowing herself to relax and to be carried away by the tale. He was an engaging story teller although she was sure much of it must be exaggerated - surely no real people would take a prank war to such extremes.

He asked about Italy so she found herself telling him about her family, her nieces’ exploits and how she’d got herself completely lost on the day trip to Venice.

She even admitted the trip took place when it did because she had been signed off work - fever really did make her too honest.

She didn’t say why. He didn’t ask. But the ball of tension that had resided in her throat for weeks eased, just a little.

She talked about Bez. He told her about his family, their different skills and interests and how proud of them all he was. He shared more dad jokes. She informed him they were terrible.

An hour or so later, having been chivvied to finally send the email to the school office, she crawled back into bed and a thankfully dreamless sleep took her.

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She woke with a start to the sound of the doorbell and Bez skittering about excitedly in the hallway. 10am - was it someone from school checking she was really ill? Staggering on jelly legs to the door she cautiously cracked it open.

“Delivery for Miss Herz… Herma…zew…” the courier frowned and held out a large brown paper bag.

“That would be me. Err thanks.”

Leaning heavily on the closed door she gently pushed Bez’s enthusiastic head out of the bag. In fairness to him it was emitting quite a pleasant aroma. Which turned out to be chicken soup and plain toasted bagels from a deli in town. she recognised the name of the place but it was far too fancy for her to have ever darkened the door. A bottle of isotonic drink and a range of herbal teabags were also included along with a printed note reading only “Get well soon, S x”

Well that was… unexpected. And kind.

Bez was beginning to lose his mind so she poured half the soup into his bowl and curled up on the sofa. She nibbled at a piece of fancy bagel… it really was excellent and probably wasted on her somewhat battered palate. She picked up her phone to send a thank you message, trying to calculate what the time difference must be when suddenly she froze and the bagel fell from her hand to immediately be wolfed down by her delighted dog.

How had he known her address?

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“John?”

“Yes EOS?”

“What kind of bagel flies?”

John ducked, concerned that the AI might be regressing back to old tricks. His immediate vicinity remained airborne-bread-product free, however.

“I’m sorry?”

“A plain bagel.”

“What?”

“It is a pun. I have deliberately exploited the fact that there are two meanings of the word plane for comedic effect. It is funny.”

Silence reigned.

“John?”

He lifted his head from his hands and sighed. “Yes EOS?”

“Why aren’t you laughing?”

“I was distracted by plotting my eldest brother’s demise.”

“He mentioned that you might initially react with threats of violence to his person and advised that persistence is generally the key to good comedy. What do ghosts put on their bagels?”

John flinched unwillingly and tried to cover it by playing along.

“I don’t know EOS, what do ghosts put on their bagels?”

“Scream cheese. This one is another play on words because although it isn’t precisely the same phoneme the sound is very similar.”

“I get it EOS.”

“You still aren’t laughing, John. Should I continue with the persistence strategy? Or perhaps I should carry out further research?”

“The latter I think.”

There was a pause.

“John, whilst we are discussing bagels, I believe you would enjoy a trip to the South West of England.”

John looked up from the weather front he was monitoring and frowned as he tried to predict the punchline to this one.

“Why is that EOS?”

“This deli claims to produce the most delicious bagels in Europe.”

“Good to know. What brought that to your attention?”

“Scott asked me to research the best place to order from in that locality.”

John noted the dropping of the surname from her habitual reference to his family members. Thus far, only he had been on first name only terms with his AI. It seemed his big brother had been upgraded too.

“He did, did he?” John paused, wondering whether further enquiry was overstepping a boundary. Maybe it was a little, but Scott had been acting weirdly and as a caring brother John should keep an eye on him.

“Did he say why?”

“We sent a ‘care package’ to a friend.” EOS enunciated the new phrase carefully.

John’s eyebrows defied his attempt to maintain a poker face. Turning away from EOS’s camera track he opened a private line to Virgil.

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Hey how are you doing? Hope you managed to get some sleep?

She typed and deleted three variants of a reply, then buried the phone under a cushion and curled up on the couch with her head on Bez’s flank. The dog huffed in his sleep.

She had eaten the rest of the food. She wasn’t insane - it was delicious and probably eye-wateringly expensive - and she didn’t have the energy to prepare herself anything else. It really was a thoughtful gesture and she had to say thank you. Should have done already.

But the initial glow of warmth at the thought she had a friend out there somewhere who cared had been swamped by the creepy feeling. She wasn’t listed in the directory. Never had been. There had never seemed any point as who would look her up and it would only result in sales calls or junk mail. And advertising her surname might invite the attention of the unpleasant minority with a particular political statement to make.

The “It’s over now, why are you still here?” type of statement. Best avoided.

So how had he got it?

She thought again of his immediate offer of company, which had seemed sweet if rather silly at the time.

What if there was an ulterior motive?

She shivered and had to focus to push back certain memories that still lurked too close to the edge of her consciousness.

Don’t be ridiculous. The man had the entire world at his feet. And she was literally being sick at the time. Hardly attractive to someone thinking in that way. She thought back to the time they had had coffee… no… he didn’t seem like that kind of a person. He’d seemed… surprisingly genuine. The occasional text exchanges they’d had since then had backed up that initial impression. And last night in all that time messaging her, keeping her company, there were no red flags at all, she’d even felt maybe he was someone she could trust… could actually talk to.

Aaaaaah which meant he was just being nice and she hadn’t responded! Being wary, even cynical was one thing, but she couldn’t bear to be rude. She grabbed the phone but found herself hesitating again. Maybe she could just ask about the address and if he was weird about it let him down gently and delete his number and hide. Yes, hide from the guy who could buy her entire town if the fancy took him. Right. That would definitely work.

"Damnit Scott Tracy, you’d better not be a weirdo stalker."

Bez looked up sleepily.

“Sorry, Bez, didn’t mean to say that out loud.

Right. Ok. Thank you message.

She added a smiley face to make it seem less flat and reread it again.

And then again. It would have to do.

She pressed send.

Hi, I seem to be ok now just really drained. Thank you for the soup, it was just what I needed. 🙂

Glad to hear it. Make sure you keep hydrated and get plenty of rest

I get the impression you say that kind of thing a lot?

Ha. Yeah I’ve 4 little brothers. We’ve seen our fair share of stomach flu.

Seriously though, the hydration thing…

She eyed her empty glass. He had a point actually.

I am literally getting up to refill my drink now

Good 🥃

That was the wrong emoji, I do not recommend whisky at this time!

Estera leant heavily on the side of the sink, sipping water and trying to calculate whether she could take more tablets for the throbbing headache yet. No, not quite. She eyed the phone on the table. Ah, it was no good, she had to ask or she’d be driven to madness by overthinking.

Can I ask you something?

Of course!

Fire away

How do you know my address?

The little ticks turned green and she waited for the completely normal and un-terrifying response that was obviously coming.

Except it didn’t. After ten minutes, she stopped watching the unchanging screen and hid the phone in a drawer. Being unable to see it didn’t help in the slightest. Checking it again showed no change. She slammed the drawer closed.

She crawled into the shower and sat motionless under the flow of water, trying to work out how on earth she could afford to quit her job, move home and change her name.

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Chapter 17…

[tangledbea]

What exactly happened when Rapunzel realized she was the lost princess? She just kinda looked at her hankie with the Corona sun, started seeing said sun in her wall art. Then she sort of remembered her parents, and she remembered the mural of them and her as a baby, then she sees herself wearing the crown in the mirror, and she realizes she's the lost princess from this? Did she search her feelings like they do in Star Wars or something.

Okay, so while it's a little bit bullshit (no one would have even the vaguest of memories from when they were a literal infant because long-term memory doesn't develop until around 2 years of age), I can handwave it because it's a fairytale.

What happened is that she looked at the sun on her souvenir, then realized she'd been subtly putting that same image in her art for her entire life. But how could she possibly have prior knowledge of that symbol if she's never left the tower? From this, she remembered the sun symbol on her mobile when she was a baby and had vague recollections of the people (her parents) leaning over her. From there, she was able to recognize them from that mural she saw of the king and queen. And in that mural, they were holding the blonde baby who - even when she first saw it, even if she didn't quite connect the dots (I've connected them) just yet - she realized looked exactly like her, especially when she was wearing the crown, which she saw very recently. (And even at the time that she put on the crown, she had a strange sense of recognition, even though she couldn't place it.)

And then she put two and two (and two) together, and realized that the king and queen were her parents, and that she was the Lost Princess.

In something that might be a headcanon or might be an observation, I think she's been painting the sun even before she was old enough to do much more than scribble.

These are the earliest paintings we see in the tower, and it looks to me like she scribbled the sun over and over.

[alberta-sunrise]

I’m so darn proud of this

[climbthemountain2020]

Remains of Spring - Chapter 5

Part 5/5 | Ao3

This chapter fits in right after Chapter 24 of Hope of Spring, right before the epilogue. You can find that here.   To catch up on Hope of Spring from the beginning and read sequentially, go here.

Tamlin’s eyes shot open, the night sky still dark through the open windows and the stars shining bright. He turned his head to see Penny still sleeping soundly next to him and smiled. Her hair was spread across the pillow in a beautiful fan, her cheek squished against the hand tucked beneath her face and her lips parted. He could tell from the steady whoosh of breath between her lips that she was deeply asleep.

He thought she looked as beautiful as ever.

The tinkling cry that must have woken him in the first place rang out again, tiny and mostly quiet, but Tamlin had grown accustomed to listening for it now, even deep in sleep. He softly pulled the covers back, slipping out of bed softly enough to hopefully not wake Penny. On near-silent feet, he crept to the adjoining nursery, the open windows blowing the warm night air through the curtains and into the room softly illuminated by only the moon.

As Tamlin approached, he took in the large bassinet, a mobile of enchanted ferns and flowers circling slowly above it. He didn’t have to guess which baby was making the fuss–it was always Kalliope. Kyron could sleep through another war. It was Kalliope, his little spitfire, that would be awake staring at the stars and cooing loudly. She was a curious baby from the start, lifting her little head immediately off Penny’s chest to take in the world, barely in it for a minute. The pride that had swelled in his heart witnessing it had been like nothing Tamlin had ever experienced before, but he’d had experienced it many times since.

He was met with the bright green eyes and mop of blonde that was his daughter as he peeked over the bassinet edge. When she caught sight of him, she immediately burbled loudly, reaching up with chubby fingers and stretching her hands for him. His heart melted immediately in his chest, and he reached down to pick up the babbling baby girl.

“Hello, sweet love. What’s got you up at this witching hour, hmm?” He held her softly to his chest, grabbing a muslin blanket to wrap her in as he took her from the room, shutting the door quietly behind him as he meandered downstairs. She gripped big handfuls of his hair and tugged, to which Tamlin grimaced a bit before smiling. In the last six months, he’d gotten used to the unnaturally strong grip of his children’s dimpled hands, especially in regards to faces and hair. Even as tiny babies, they were both incredibly strong, and he couldn’t help the grip of pride that wrung him out thoroughly, even at the expense of his stinging scalp.

Kalliope burbled again as they walked down the stairs.

“You’re just a night owl, aren’t you?” She squealed in response, clapping her hands when he laughed. “You get that from me. Plus, the best things happen at night.” He smiled, holding out a hand to run over the familiar crack in the marble of the walls. It had become almost smooth over the years, a touch stone for the two of them every time they walked down the stairs and remembered how blessed they’d been by fate.

He brought the wiggling little girl out to the back deck since it was such a nice night, settled onto the gliding bench and holding her up in his arms to wrap her in the light blanket. She looked at him with inquisitive eyes. She may have gotten all his coloring, but her features and expressions reminded him so much of her mother that Tamlin’s heart clenched every time he beheld either of them. The joy he’d been given in this second chance at life had been overwhelming; there were still so many days he felt as though he wasn’t worthy of any of it, but he would always endeavor to be.

“Do you want a story to help you sleep, sweet girl?” He took the drool bubble she blew then laughed at as an affirmative.

“Once upon a time, there was a fearsome monster in these woods. I know, it doesn’t seem like it because it’s so lovely and peaceful. He’s not here anymore.”

She had ceased all noise and was looking at him with wide, interested eyes.

“The monster was angry and violent–scaring off anyone who came close or tried to help. He was so miserable and filled with rage, he couldn’t even see a path to getting better.”

Tamlin sighed; remembering it all was still painful.

“One night, a beautiful princess came to save him. She came out of nowhere, right into his life without warning, and he was taken so by surprise that he didn’t even know what to do with her.”

If a baby could listen with rapt attention, Kalliope was doing so. Her bright eyes were focused entirely on him as she listened.

“The princess made the monster remember what it had been like to be a person instead of something terrible. She made him remember that he could be worth something if he tried. She was patient and kind and strong, and she made him realize that he hadn’t really been living at all before she came around.”

Despite her best efforts, her little eyelids began to flutter, and he set her back against his legs and wrapped her tighter in her blanket as he went on.

“The princess loved the monster despite all the odds, and she fought off all the other monsters that threatened them. She was so lovely and fearless–she could do anything in the world. Even turn the monster back into a prince.”

Kalliope sighed as her long lashes met her cheeks and her eyes stayed closed.

“That princess changed my whole life, you know. She’s the best thing that ever happened to me.” He ghosted a thumb across his daughter’s chubby cheek. “And so are you and your brother. You’ve all chased that monster away so far that he can never come back,” he whispered to the night sky.

If meeting Penny had changed Tamlin’s entire life, then having the twins had turned it irrevocably into something new, unearthing layers of himself that he never thought could possibly exist. He was a protector, but gentle, loving, and kind. He was soft, precious cargo in his large hands making him more tender than he’d ever been. He’d seen parts of himself exposed that he never thought himself capable of–and with it had come the pain of a lot of self-discovery. His father had never loved him the way Tamlin loved his children, had never sat awake with him at night, holding his tiny hands and soothing him back to sleep. It made him realize how much he’d been set up to fail from the start in life, and he was more thankful than ever that Penny had showed up and made him fight for it.

Now, Tamlin couldn’t imagine a world without the three of them in it. The staff of Spring doted on them, spoiling them, probably, none more so than Talisa and Mariela. They were constantly flying the babies around the gardens, letting them frolic in the hills and at the fish pond, bringing them home covered in mud and gripping flowers at the stem and plopping them into warm baths. Their friends in the other courts had made themselves fixtures in the twins’ lives, as well–everyone simply over the moon at the prospect of new babies. And they had babies in spades.

Within the past year, the twins had arrived along with Cassian and Nesta’s first, a girl named Irina, and Lucien and Elain’s second, a girl named Kit. They got the babies together as often as they could, setting out great blankets on the rolling hills and letting them roll and crawl and babble about together, hoping they’d all grow up to be lifelong friends. Tamlin had never imagined a universe where it was possible–that his closest friends, his family, would hail from the courts of Night and Day, but it filled him with a joy so immeasurable that he still got a little emotional about it. Seeing their children grow up together was a gift beyond belief.

Kalliope’s snores were softly piercing the night, and Tamlin knew it was time to go back in. These were the moments he knew would be fleeting–the ones he would look back on and treasure forever.

“What are we even paying a night nurse for, my love?” A kind voice quietly rang out next to his ear as a soft hand met his shoulder.

“Well, I was trying to not wake you. What are you doing up?” He turned, twisting his neck to kiss her on the jaw.

“I woke up and you were gone. I saw Kyron was still sleeping, so I assumed I would find you two partners in crime roaming in the night.” She smiled conspiratorily at him.

“She’s back out now. Just needed a story.” They both paused to look at their daughter, peaceful and lovely in sleep.

“I heard.”

“You did?” He turned to look at her again, to take in the soft smile on her beautiful face. He couldn’t believe that this life was his. That this female had chosen him to love.

“You were always a prince to me, albeit a grumpy one at times.” She smiled, pressing soft kisses to his lips.

“Thank you, princess. For all of it.”

“Shall we go back in?” He gently pulled Kalliope to his chest, rising from the bench and wrapping an arm around Penny.

“Let’s get back to bed, Sunshine.”

[einsteinsugly]

Eric and Donna, with their first baby. The headcanons.

*They're absolutely late 80s/90s Oshkosh B'Gosh parents. Baby Gap is another staple, too.

*Bob buys "baby on board" stickers, and makes them put them on their cars.

*Kitty makes a quilt for their baby, and needlework with their baby's name and birth date on it.

*Donna literally kicks Eric out of bed a couple of times. It's his turn, damn it.

*Eric likes to pace around, holding the baby. Red did/does the same thing.

*Donna reads a lot more baby books than Eric; Eric asks around a bit more, and nervously goes with the flow. And wonders if he'll ever be good enough.

*They technically baptize their baby as Catholic, but with a giant asterisk. They're not really going to take their kid to church all that much.

*Donna tries to introduce their kid to picture books as soon as humanly possible.

*Eric starts preaching about Star Wars before the kid can even talk. A Star Wars mobile hangs over their kid's crib.

*For some reason, all of the gang's babies love to puke on Eric. Their kid is no exception.

[stop-spreading-this-poll]

Active Polls

Upcoming polls:

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[direwolfrules]

A funny headcanon I have about my various AUs’ Tarre Vizlas has somehow grown background. So here, have some Space Shakespeare (or Spacespeare as I’ve been calling him):

Spacespeare was an Alderaanian playwright. All the political stuff his various plays were touching upon now refer to the Alderaanian noble house drama occurring at the time.

The settings of his plays in “exotic locales” have changed to other Star Wars planets. Hamlet takes place on Empress Teta, Romeo & Juliet on Mandalore, etc.

Palpatine hates Spacespeare because he failed a class on his work in college. He scrubs all records of the man like he did with the Jedi, to limited success. Vader keeps reuploading Macbeth (baby Anakin liked all the murder) and A Midsummer Night's Dream (it was Padme's favorite).

Sabine absolutely reads all the black market Spacespeare she can get her hands on after the Academy. If she had to sit through years of listening to how seditious and evil his work was, she’s gonna seek it out now that she’s in open rebellion. “Exit, persued by a bear” is her favorite bit of stage direction ever, and she delights in getting to say it after Ezra attempts to connect to a space bear and fails miserably. Kanan startled for a minute because he hasn’t heard Spacespeare since he was a preteen struggling to stay awake in literature class.

Ignore the pink, Tumblr’s mobile app and I are at war and I refuse to turn off dark mode to type posts.