#spent too long thinking about the options here lmao

[avianii]

got tagged by @sevdidntdie thought it would be fun

tagging @calkale @airlocksandaviaries @liass-21 @blueisglueredisdead and anyone else who wants to <3

[shannonsketches]

[thecherrygod]

Hm

[catopoliscat]

next time / kento nanami/fem!reader.

who would have thought that kento nanami was a virgin? not you. not after this long. perhaps he was saving himself for someone. perhaps he was waiting for you.

tags: nsfw. 18+. fem!reader. afab reader. penetrative sex. alcohol. dry humping. virgin!nanami. mutual pining. friends to lovers. creampie (wrap it kids). unprotected sex. touch-starved!nanami. canon!verse. you've known nanami since school. tinges of angst. nanami wanted you bad lmao. it's love babey. reader has experience. no use of y/n or any other placeholders. ever. wc: 7.7k. a/n: i kind of fear nanami's a little ooc here lmao, but i've spent too long on this so fuck it we ball he deserves this

also how mad would you be if i said this was set a week before shibuya arc be honest

mdni.

You’re a bottle and half of zinfandel deep when Nanami tells you. 

Although you’re both a little warm, tipsy perhaps, you didn’t think either of you were quite drunk enough for this conversation just yet. It was a regular occurrence for the two of you to share a drink on a Friday, or a bottle in more pressing times. 

There were more bottles than glasses, lately. 

It was just two old friends, catching up. Talking. Complaining--usually about Satoru. Often you’d reminisce on easier times. Warm summers in the Jujutsu High courtyard, the cold tin of a soda in your hands, a bottle of water in his. Quiet talks of dreams and eventualities. Ignoring the gaping absence of a third at between you. 

Tonight though, you’re not sure when the topic had changed. Somewhere between the last dregs of the first bottle and the beginning of the second, the conversation had grown more sombre than usual. Talk of love and relationships always seemed to make the air heavier around the two of you, for different reasons. A stark air of loneliness that not even the most tart of white wine could overpower.

You had offhandedly mentioned turning down one of the windows you had met on your last mission. He had been younger than you, still full of life where the holes in yourself had long since emptied it out. You had shaken your head, flattered, but tired. There were better options for a man like him, still full of hope and vitality, a whole life ahead of him… when you knew any day yours could be cut deftly short. 

You had told yourself it had little to do with the fact that the man’s bright smile had reminded you of another, so many years ago.  

In the quiet of Nanami’s living room, swirling the last drops of your wine in your glass, you had mentioned that you had no real desire for relationships anymore. Other than sex, of course, but only sexual. A temporary release, one of the few you had left. Nameless faces and hurried touches. Sometimes clinical, sometimes primal. Always quick, and never the same person twice. 

You know?

To which Nanami had replied, “No.�� 

Misunderstanding the gravity of what he was saying, you had raised an eyebrow, a curious smile playing at your lips. “Not one for one-night stands?” 

It occurs to you distantly that you don’t know a lot about Nanami’s romantic life. Close as you two were, or so you liked to believe, he had never really mentioned it. And you had never asked. 

Nanami had shook his head in response to your question, and you had nodded. It aligned with his character, you thought. As cold and stoic as he liked to act, you couldn’t imagine a world where he would use and discard someone. He felt too much, cared too much. He would love too much too, if given the chance. If he gave himself the chance. 

In your musings, you had almost missed what he had murmured next. 

“I’ve never had sex at all.” 

Kento Nanami. A virgin.

The confession has your lips parting, your eyes blinking. Once, then twice, akin to an owl. You glance down at your wine glass for a moment, as if it had been the slightly smeared glass that had been speaking to you instead, and not the esteemed stoic sorcerer you had known for the better part of ten years. 

You look over at Nanami on the couch, but he’s staring at the carpet, his expression contemplative, almost pensive. His brows are drawn taut, a small knit on his forehead. His lips are drawn into a thin line, a slight crease in his chin. There was a specific emotion dancing in his eyes. You almost dared to use the word vulnerable.

It seems… ridiculous. Nanami? Attractive as he was? Kind, considerate, hard-working, to a degree. A woman’s dream. In another life, perhaps your dream too.

Had it not been for Nanami’s serious demeanour, and the fact that ‘joke’ and ‘Nanami’ rarely went together in the same sentence, you might have thought he was pulling your leg. A joke between friends. 

But he wasn’t. He very clearly wasn’t. 

“That’s… fine,” you finally say after a small moment, fearing you had let the silence linger too long. “There’s no rush for these things.” 

Nanami’s hum is short and clipped. Gruff, almost. He still refuses to meet your eye for now, and you make no move to change that. You get the distinct feeling that this newfound vulnerability doesn’t stem from him never having sex, but rather, the reason why he’s denied himself - because you know for a fact it has little to do with opportunity. 

You had lost track of how many women you had watched Nanami turn down, clipped and short, yet always polite. 

The silence is heavy between you. In the other room, you can hear the hum of his refrigerator, the buzz of the bulbs in the lights. Nanami’s apartment has always been quiet, but this silence feels suffocating. Paired with the wine, your head feels thick, your tongue thicker. 

A few moments pass, and as the revelation of his virginity settles into your stomach like seltzer water, you realise… it makes sense. Nanami wasn’t the type to use someone for sex, even if eager. He’d only have sex with someone he was in love with. Someone he trusted at the very least. 

And Nanami, as he had told you and a few others before, refused to entertain the thought of love whilst he was a sorcerer. No one with two working brain cells needed to ask why. He wasn’t alone in that choice, either. 

You toy with the stem of your wineglass whilst you toy with a reoccurring thought in your mind, one that you entertained often, but had yet to voice aloud. 

“You shouldn’t keep depriving yourself, Kento,” you say quietly. The use of his first name, rarely used in your adulthood, garners you a glance from him. It’s a small sign that you’re taking this seriously. 

“I’m not deprived of anything.” 

You scoff at that, small and quiet. “You deprive yourself of a lot, apart from pain,” you drawl, setting your wine glass down on the coffee table. Like always, the wine and Nanami’s masochistic tendencies have your tongue loosening more than it should. “I understand not wanting to have sex with anyone you’re not in a committed relationship with. It’s kind of… admirable, and definitely you.” You fold your arms across your chest, fixing him with a stare that he still refuses to meet head-on. “But why deny yourself the chance of love?” 

In the back of your mind somewhere is a voice chanting ‘hypocrite’, but you ignore it. Nanami, however, does not. 

He finally turns his head to face you, the lines underneath his eyes seemingly heavier in the dim light of his apartment. An eyebrow arches. “And meaningless sex is different?”

You scoff again, louder this time. “It’s not meaningless just because I don’t love my partner.” 

“Or even know their name?” 

You raise a sharp eyebrow, your own lips now pressing into a thin line. A part of you wants to retort, to snap, but you remember the vulnerability in his face from a few moments ago, and you just about hold your tongue.

With an exhale, you grab the half-empty wine bottle off of the coffee table instead and gesture for Nanami to hold out his glass. He does, and the glug of the wine fills the space between you.

“You ever thought about it?” You ask, filling up your own glass. In your peripheral, you see him sit quietly for a moment before he nods his head. 

“I’m only human.” 

You hum. “You should experience it,” you add. You swirl the wine in your glass once before bringing it up to your lips. “Even once. Even if it means nothing.”  

With one glance, you can tell immediately that the idea doesn’t sit right with him. It was easy to forget sometimes how rigid and traditional he could be. Formalities that few seemed to care about these days. Always on the things you least expected. 

“I couldn’t,” Nanami replies, shaking his head. 

Oddly, you feel the desire to insist. Days of a sorcerer were short, and getting shorter every year. Younger than yourself and Nanami had already died long before they would ever have the opportunity to touch another, kiss another; to feel the warmth of a body against your own. They would never know what that distinct pleasure was like, even if they desperately wanted to. Time was infinite to the young, until it wasn’t.  

It occurs to you quickly that you’re thinking of Haibara, and everything you and Nanami had experienced that he never would. 

Something must show in your expression because Nanami raises an eyebrow at you. You swallow, before setting your glass back down on the coffee table with a dull clink. You look at him, your face surprisingly collected and casual for what you’re about to ask. 

“What about me?” 

Nanami’s questioning look only deepens for a moment, before something passes by his eyes. His lips part, his version of a falter. You know he knows what you’re implying, but still, he asks, “…what about you?” 

“What if we had sex?” You say without hesitation. “You know me. You trust me.” 

Nanami falters further. He straightens in his seat, his glass resting on his thigh, the thick muscle straining against his slacks. His whole body is thick with a tension you usually only see before a fight with a particularly highly graded curse. A vein protrudes from his neck.

His eyes flick between your face and your own glass, clearly wondering if it is time to call this night done, but you rise from your seat before he can, taking a small step toward the couch he’s sitting on. 

You sit down next to him, a little closer than you usually might. He doesn’t move away. Your thigh brushes against his, and this close, you can hear his breath hitch in response. 

“I’m not going to push this any further, Kento,” you say quietly, “but I’m letting you know it’s an option.” 

Although you and Kento were hardly affectionate with one another like most friends, you decided to take a chance tonight. You had already taken several, what was one more?

Reaching out, you take his glass from his hand and set it next to yours on the coffee table. Hesitating only a moment, you place your hand on top of his, your fingers curling around until your fingertips touch his palm.

His hand is stiff and warm underneath your own. The bones and knuckles press against your skin.

Something in the back of your mind is wondering why you’re pushing this at all. Would it matter if Nanami died without experiencing the pleasures of the body, really? Would the world stop turning for either of you? You know if Nanami really wanted to, if he felt the want, the desire - then he could leave this apartment right now and find someone willing, someone other than you. He could have done so years ago, during those few years he had masqueraded as a normal human being with a nine-to-five. 

You were risking a friendship over… what? The implied hopes and dreams of a dead fifteen-year-old? Haibara was dead. It didn’t matter to him whether Nanami experienced the things he never could. 

Nanami’s gaze flickers between your eyes for a moment, and this close, you can see the faint traces of the wine staining his lips. Your gaze must linger for a touch too long because his tongue swipes across his bottom lip. The pink skin glistens with the faint glimmer of his saliva.

When you look up, you see his eyes trained on your own lips, before they quickly flick back up to meet your eyes. 

“We’re friends,” he murmurs, his voice low, slightly thick. 

“And we always will be,” you reply.

He glances down at your hands. Somewhere between your own thoughts and Nanami’s reiteration of your friendship, your hands had interlocked, fingers intertwined like vines. He was gripping your hand a little too tightly to be comfortable, but you didn’t flinch. 

You’re not sure whether it had been your subconscious doing, or his. 

“I… can’t,” Nanami mutters finally, closing his eyes for a moment. “Not like this. Not… now.” 

Something clenches in your heart at his rejection, although you had expected it. You’re not sure if it’s because he’s denying you, or himself. 

You smile softly nonetheless and nod. “If you ever change your mind, you know where to find me,” you say quietly, going to pull your hand from his grip and give him some space. 

Only he doesn’t let go. If anything, his grip tightens slightly. 

Your eyes flick between his hand and his eyes, still trained on your face. You raise an eyebrow, your lips parting to speak, but he beats you to it. 

“But I’d like to kiss you.” 

Something resembling a very quiet ‘uh’ pushes past your lips in a long exhale.

You’re not sure why the idea of kissing him felt more… intimate than the fact that you had offered your body to him only seconds prior. You’re not sure why there’s a prickle of heat at the back of your neck or your lips burn with a sudden need.

“Nanam-“

As if remembering himself, he shakes his head slightly, blinking away whatever stupor had just possessed him. He looks away, his grip on your hand loosening, but not quite pulling away. 

“I… don’t know why I said that,” he mumbles. “You should go-“

Your free hand is already gripping his chin, turning his face toward yours a little too sharply. A subtle grunt leaves his throat as he looks at you, his gaze foggier than usual. From the wine, you, or the whole situation? Who knows. 

Fingers against his neck, feeling the quickened thrum of his pulse, your thumb brushes against his chin, pulling the skin until his lips naturally part. You feel Nanami’s shaky exhale against your lips as you lean forward, warmth breath mingling with yours, the scent of wine heavy on the air. 

You close the distance slowly, giving him time to stop this, to pull or push away. To draw an end to this nonsense before it went any further. 

Instead of pulling back or pushing you away, he closes the gap so quickly your noses almost bump together. 

The first press of his lips against you feels hurried and unsure. It’s off-center slightly, barely hitting the corner of your mouth, but Nanami is quick to correct it. He slots his lips against yours more firmly the second time, his lips parting to capture yours fully. You feel a rush of air against your cheek as he exhales through his nose. 

The kiss is unhurried, curious almost, yet there’s a subtle urgency in it that surprises you. Your free hand moves from his chin to his jaw, fingertips softly caressing the sharp curve of it. The sound and feel of his sigh against your lips makes you shiver, and you become enamoured with it. 

Enamoured with him.

You part your lips further, your tongue swiping against his bottom lip, finally tasting the remnants of the wine that you had spotted earlier. An odd sound builds at the back of his throat before his mouth parts too, his tongue brushing against yours. 

Something changes quickly then. His hand, larger than you ever really noticed, cups the back of your neck, his calloused thumb pressing against your jaw, drawing you closer. Your other hands, still intertwined, seem to tighten around one another like a snake's coils. The wet smacks of your lips grow louder in the quiet of his apartment, just about overriding the sound of increasingly ragged breaths, borderline panting. 

Your head feels thick. Dizzy. The kiss is indulgent, almost sloppy now. Nanami’s tongue is in your mouth, exploring every crevice, tasting you with an eagerness you hadn’t thought he was capable of. Every time you brush your tongue against his, your taste buds wetly sliding against his own, a small sound rumbles in the back of his throat, somewhere between a groan and grumble. 

After a moment that feels like an eternity too short, you pull back slightly, just enough to see his eyes as you open yours. Nanami denies you this, however, because when you open your eyes, his are still closed, almost scrunched. A faint frown tugs at his brow. 

He leans forward until his forehead rests against yours. The heat of his skin against yours feels searing, your noses softly brushing against one another’s. He sighs deeply, as if pulled from the back of his chest. It almost sounds like defeat. 

“Kento-“

“I want you,” he breathes out, and your voice almost hitches as you feel rather than hear his voice. It’s a deep, husky sound, more rumble than syllable. But there’s a crack in his tone belying a raw vulnerability that you weren’t familiar with. Not from him.

His eyes finally open, looking up at you from underneath his brow. His hazel eyes are almost black, you realise, the familiar colour you’ve always admired swallowed up by a sea of coal. You wonder if yours are the same. 

He’s trembling too. You can feel his fingertips shake where they press against the nape of your neck. 

“I thought you didn’t want… this,” you murmur. ‘Sex’ suddenly feels too…

“I changed my mind,” he replies, a touch too quickly for you to believe that he was thinking clearly. 

But God, did you want him too. You want him so fucking bad it almost makes you ache. Your feelings toward Nanami had always been friendly, respectful. He had been your closest friend, your ally, your confidant. You had been through so much together. You liked him, every part. 

And somewhere along the way, between the four years apart as he pursued a different life and the first time you had hugged him when he finally returned, Gojo grinning over his shoulder… you think, that like had changed to love.

It quickly occurs to you that you weren’t pushing Nanami to experience sex for fear of him missing out. That was you. You were scared of missing out on him.

It’s that revelation that makes you pull back slightly, and Nanami’s eyes widen a little, some of the hazy fog clearing. His hand slides from the back of your neck, falling limply against the couch next to your thigh. 

“I… I shouldn’t have put you in this position,” you mutter, glancing away, staring at the two wine glasses on the coffee table before looking back at him. “It’s your choice. Your first time should be on your terms, not because I think you’re missing out or depriving yourself.”

You go to remove your hand from his, but once again, his grip tightens, but there’s a tenderness to it this time. A gentle squeeze, almost begging you not to go. Not yet. 

He looks serious now, staring at you squarely, as if about to deliver a mission report, and its the first familiar expression you’ve seen on his face thus far. He swallows thickly, the only thing belying his hesitation. 

“I said I couldn’t have a one-night stand.” 

You frown. “And th-“

“I don’t want this to be a one-night stand.” 

Some of the breath flees your lungs as you look at him. His lips are still pink and slightly swollen from kissing, his cheeks still slightly flushed from the wine and your touch. You become distinctly aware of the scent of his cologne, faded but warm from his skin. It’s soft, smoky almost. You have the urge to bury his nose in the crook of his neck and breathe.

You know what he’s trying to say, what he’s trying to ask. You know what he wants because you want it too. You realise you’ve wanted it for a long damn time. 

Words fail you. They feel… inadequate to describe what you’re feeling, what you desire, what you’ve always desired buried down underneath the guilt and trauma. 

But you still can’t bring yourself to say it out loud. Not here. Not yet. 

And neither can he.

You’re not sure who makes the first move, all you know is that your lips are pressed against his and he moans into your mouth as if something had finally let go. It’s like a cork had finally been released, a lifetime of pent-up feelings pouring out in one gush. 

His hand is back at the nape of your neck, holding you tightly this time, unwilling to let go. His lips part more readily with every press, his tongue seeking yours with a pinpoint determination. You skip his jaw this time altogether, aiming straight for his hair that you’ve been dying to touch since… you don’t know when. 

The hand that had been holding yours hostage finally releases, only so his fingers can brush against your waist. His fingers brush against your ribs through your clothes, tugging you closer until you’re rising up onto your knees on the couch just to oblige. He’s tilting back, his broad shoulders bumping against the couch cushions behind him - and it’s only distantly you register it’s because you’re pushing him back against it. 

Something shouts at you in the back of your mind to take your time, to savour this, to savour him. You may want each other badly, but this is Nanami’s first time. It should be done carefully, respectfully, the way he would treat you if this position had been reversed. 

But then Nanami’s hand has moved from your waist to your thigh, blindly grabbing it as he pulls it over his lap. Before you know it, you’re straddling his hips with a huff against his lips, and something like a sharp, pained groan leaves his lips. 

You pull away from his lips with a ragged breath, concern knitting your brow until you realise what the cause of his groan was. 

Straddling him, you can feel the pulse of his desire underneath you, the hard ridge of the bulge in his pants pressing insistently against your core through your own clothes. One hand is grabbing your hip tightly, almost too tight, as his forehead rests against your shoulder. The other hand is on your thigh, his thumb digging into the plush flesh there. 

His breathing is ragged, extremely so. Hot puffs fall against your skin. You weave your fingers through his hair softly, and you watch with reverence as a strong shudder rolls down his spine in response.

“We can stop, if you’d like,” you murmur against his ear, going to rise up on your knees to give him a little breathing room.

“Don’t,” he grunts, the grip on your hip and thigh quickly stopping you. He exhales again, a shaky sound as he keeps his forehead stamped against your shoulder. His voice emerges again, barely audible, slightly pained. “...I’ve wanted this for so long.”

Your grip in his hair tightens in response. In a flood, memories of him rush through your mind. A thousand different glances, subtle touches, small clues. Even in school, the way he would linger, a touch closer every time Suguru or Satoru would appear. The hand at the bottom of your back in a restaurant. The way he would lean in to hear you in a crowded place. 

The way his arms had tightened around you when he had returned after four years away. I missed you too, almost inaudible against your ear. 

Nanami didn’t want a one-night stand. What was the point of sex at all, if it wasn’t with you? 

The thought has you rolling your hips down against his before you can stop yourself, feeling the firm length of his cock grind against your core. A moan leaves your lips, and something guttural leaves his. 

The hand on your thigh moves up to your other hip, pulling you down tighter against him as if he could slide inside you right now. “Don’t tease,” he hisses between clenched teeth. He turns his head slightly, his lips brushing against your neck. He leaves a searing, open-mouthed kiss against your pulse point. “Not now, not after this long.” 

“You think you’re the only one who waited?” You pant as you grind again, firmer this time. His hips buck against yours in response, a muffled groan leaving his lips, imprinted against your neck. You can feel his cock throb against you, twitching against the fabric that separates you. 

“…you wanted this too?” He breathes out after a moment. 

You nod, though you doubt he can see it from the way his face is buried against the crook of your neck. “Since you came back. Since you hugged me back and said you missed me.” 

His hands move from your hips to wrap tightly around your waist as if he couldn’t bear for a single slither of space to be left between you two. His hips jut up against you once again, a ragged breath leaving his lips. It seems the idea of you wanting him for so long the same as he had the same effect on him as it had on you. If not more. 

He holds you a little tighter, running the sharp point of his nose along your throat as he tilts his head up. Finally, finally, he breaks free of your neck to look up at you, lips parted, eyes almost desperate. 

With a thick swallow, Adam’s apple bobbing, he goes to say something but falters, and murmurs your name instead. His dark eyes flick between your eyes and your lips. His cock twitches underneath you. 

“Please,” is all he can croak out, and the moan that almost leaves your lips would have been primal. 

You nod your head, giving his shoulders a small squeeze, pushing him back slightly. He seems reluctant to let go, but finally relents after a little insistence, reclining back against the couch. His arms unwind and his hands drop to your hips. He looks up at you, clearly waiting for your lead. 

You sit back slightly on his parted thighs, the muscles firm and supportive underneath you. Letting your hands fall from his shoulders, you drag your fingertips slowly down over the expanse of his chest, feeling the warmth of his skin through his wrinkled shirt. As your fingers skate over his abdomen, you feel the muscles flex and roll. Nanami looks at you readily. 

“We should do this properly,” you murmur, your eyes trained on the lower buttons of his shirt, near the waistband of his slacks. “In a bed.” 

Nanami, to your surprise, shakes his head quickly, giving your hips a small squeeze. “We’ve waited long enough.” 

You raise an eyebrow but don’t disagree. Despite the need, the ache, the pulse of your own core, you can’t help but think of if the positions were reversed. The image of candles, roses and soft music fills your mind, Nanami’s guiding hands and murmured praises. It would be slow and romantic. Perfect. 

“Nanami,” you breathe out, almost chastising. With the way his cock is pressing against you, you have no doubt he’s not thinking clearly right now; the thought of having what he had wanted for so long within his grasp clouding rational thought. 

He shakes his head again, a lock of his mussed hair tickling his brow. “Next time.” He shifts, sliding down the couch a little more and spreading his thighs - and in turn, spreading yours. He grips your hips tighter, pulling you a little closer until you’re seated right on top of him. “Next time,” he repeats in a groan. “We’ll go slow. I’ll explore every inch of you, taste you. Now, I just want…” He exhales an unsteady breath, sounding like your name. “I just want you.” 

Your fingers linger near his shirt's lower button, and one of Nanami’s hands unclasps itself from your hip to gently grasp your wrist. He guides your fingertips to the belt buckle, the metal cool against your hot fingers. 

You meet his eyes once more, and his gaze is a paradox of firmness and vulnerability. He’s nervous, you think, but ready. Almost desperately so. 

Without another word, your other hand reaches down to join your other one, and your fingers are surprisingly deft as you slide the leather through the metal. Nanami watches your hands with rapt attention until the belt is loose. Your fingers slide over the metal button of his slacks, and you don’t check in this time. You pop it open before sliding his zipper down, the crackle of the metal teeth as loud as a gunshot between you.

A small sigh of what you think is relief leaves his lips as the fabric parts, giving you a small glimpse of the dark boxers underneath, straining over his cock. A small wet patch blooms at the top, wear his tip would be, and a shudder runs through you. 

Your fingers tuck into the waistband of his underwear, lingering for a moment. You look up at him at the same time he looks up at you. Without a sound, Nanami lifts his hips and you rise up to your knees. 

With a few firm tugs, you manage to inch his slacks and boxers down enough to free him. A small huff leaves his lips as the cooler air of the apartment hits his overheated flesh, and you watch in rapt attention as his cock twitches, the flushed tip glistening already.

It’s longer than you expected. Thicker too. Uncut. A prominent vein runs up the underside of it, and you have the sudden urge to follow it with your finger, or your tongue. 

Nanami shifts underneath you, and you realise you’ve been staring a touch too long.

You pull your eyes away from his cock to meet his eyes, and his breathing seemed to have quickened. Anticipation is making him stiff, almost antsy, a rare sight on a man you’ve rarely ever seen anything of other than composed. 

It’s endearing. 

Reaching down, you satisfy your own urge and run your fingertip up his shaft, following the vein, feeling it pulse steadily to the rhythm of his heart. Nanami’s hips twitch, his eyelids fluttering. Dark eyelashes tickle his cheeks.

When you curl your fingers around him, gripping him firmly at the base, his eyes shoot open, snapping to the sight of him in your palm. You give him one pull upwards, and a bead of pre-cum wells in the divot of his slit. 

“Fuck,” comes out in a very quiet, gruff choke. Your eyebrows rise in surprise, a small smile on your lips. Nanami didn’t always curse, and especially not like that. 

“Language, Nanami,” you tease, and his eyes flick up to you, something indignant and impatient in his eyes. You usually weren’t one to tease, and he wasn’t one to be teased. 

You continue to stroke him slowly for a moment, rubbing your thumb against the sensitive tip. You fingers quickly become tacky, the glide of your hand more fluid, until the lewd wet noise starts to rise to the same level as Nanami’s breathing. He grunts with every upward stroke, his hips twitching underneath you. Had it not been for your weight on top of him, you get the distinct feeling he’d be bucking up into your palm a little more eagerly. His head falls back against the couch, lips parted, his eyes fluttering closed once more as he relaxes more into the sensation. 

It occurs to you that you’ve seldom seen Nanami this relaxed. 

“Are you sure you want to do this here?” you ask, “with me on top?” 

He nods but doesn’t open his eyes. His hands run up from your hips to your waist, a soft caress. “It’ll be… easier for me- hah-“ Another choked groan leaves his lips as you give the head of his cock a small squeeze, and Nanami’s hand flies to your wrist in a blink, stopping you from making another move. 

You feel his cock throbbing in your grasp, and Nanami’s straight-up panting now, his eyes slightly wild as he tilts his head up to look at you. It’s an arousing reality to know that you had just pushed Nanami dangerously close to the edge without even meaning to. 

“I won’t last,” he murmurs, looking up at you, his eyes shining.

 You realise quickly that he’s actually asking a question. Are you sure? 

“This time,” you reply with a small smile. With his hand still around your wrist, you give his cock another squeeze, and he grits his teeth, that vein in his neck protruding once more. You can see the taut muscles in his abdomen flexing from where his shirt has bunched up. 

As much as the idea of making Nanami cum, right here, right now, appeals to you, you relent for now. You’d love nothing more than to watch him spill into your palm, to see the euphoria and bliss play out on his face… but that was for another time. The next time, perhaps. 

You release his cock, letting it fall back against his lower stomach with a dull smack, making him hiss through his teeth. Leaning forward, you brush your lips against his throat, nipping at the skin softly. 

You guide his hands to the waistband of your own bottoms, and he wastes little time in following your unspoken order. The press of your lips against his throat clearly distracts him, but he manages to pull down your clothes enough to leave you in your underwear. You kick them off the sofa haphazardly, not leaving his neck for a single moment. 

He catches you off guard when his hand immediately dives for your sex, cupping your heat through the dampened fabric. You stutter against his neck, gripping onto his shoulders for support in response. 

Your eyelids close, goosebumps erupting across your skin as you feel just how wet you are. “Nanami,” you gasp.

“Kento,” he whispers quickly. Once, then twice, he rubs his palm along your clothed pussy, something guttural building in the back of his throat as you buck down into his touch. “You’re… so wet.” 

The wet spot on the fabric clings tightly to your folds, doing very little to dampen the sensation of his touch. His fingers are exploratory, a tentativeness that belies his lack of experience with this, but his touch, the fact it’s him, here and now, makes up for it all. 

You can’t remember the last time you enjoyed a touch such as this. Not like this. 

Despite toying with Nanami’s cock until he almost burst, hypocritical impatience gets the better of you, and you remove your hand from his shoulders to tug down your own underwear, kicking it off to join the growing pile on the floor. Bare from the waist down, Nanami’s eyes roam over the exposed skin almost hungrily. 

Both calloused hands run up your thighs, pressing into the soft flesh slightly. You see his hand move for your pussy once more, but your fingers are curling back around his cock again before he can distract you. 

Next time, keep parroting in your mind. Next time you can both endure hours of foreplay; touching, kissing, tasting, the whole nine yards. You promise to make him cry out before he even sinks inside you, to run your tongue along every inch of his skin until you’re sick of the taste of him. You’d know he’d do the same. 

But you two had waited long enough. 

Gripping the base of his cock again, you brush it up against your heat, your own slick smearing across him. Nanami’s eyes almost roll back into his head, but he closes his lids before you witness it. You’re faring little better, the mere sensation of having him against you like this, the tip of his cock rubbing up against your clit sending you dizzy. You angle your hips, and just feeling the thick head press against the tight, slick ring of muscle is enough for a moan to already tumble past your lips. 

Something flickers in Nanami’s gaze as he opens his eyes again, honing in on the sight of you braced above him like this. He grips your hips, his touch light, merely supporting you for now. You look back once into his eyes, and go to check in just once more, but he leans forward, capturing your lips in a kiss that’s little more than teeth and raw need. 

His lips pressed against yours, you sink down, the wider head of his cock slipping inside you. Your lips part in a soundless gasp against his mouth, swallowing the ragged groan that leaves his throat. The stretch is slightly more than you’re prepared for. Distantly, you think, skipping foreplay wasn’t the wisest idea, but desperation, need, pushes you forward regardless. 

So you sink down further, inch by inch, and as he slides deeper and deeper, his grip on your hips grows tighter and tighter, until the force of his fingers dulls the ache of his cock kissing your cervix. 

“Oh, fuck,” you gasp as you finally bottom out, hips sitting on top of his. You realise you’re breathless, and that cowgirl might not have been the best position for taking someone of his size. Certainly not in one go, like you just had. 

Nanami is fairing no better. His mouth is agape, his biceps trembling where he clings to you. He seems dazed, winded, panting into your mouth as his arms wind against you. He pulls you forward, and you both moan as his cock seems to slide just that little bit deeper. 

You’re dizzy, strained, stretched out far more than you can ever remember being before. Your eyes are scrunched closed, your forehead knocking against his. Everything feels distant and muffled. It takes you a moment to realise Nanami’s muttering something repeatedly in fragmented gasps.

When you open your eyes, he’s looking at you almost panicked, his eyebrows knitted upward. His teeth are bared, gritted - and it’s now you notice that you’re clenching around him so tight that you’re not sure if you’re causing him more discomfort than pleasure.

You swallow thickly, trying to catch your breath. You’re flushed, prickly heat blooming across your chest and neck. You shift a little, and something pained rumbles from the back of Nanami’s chest in response.  

“Do you want me to stop or-“

“Don’t,” he grunts, his fingers shaking against your back. “Don’t move.” 

The throb of his cock inside you is insistent, and it takes everything in you not to clench tighter around him in response. You know he’s close, dangerously close, and as much as you want to rise up on your knees and slam yourself down on his cock until he’s begging you to stop, you clench your jaw and relax. 

You bury your face in the crook of his neck, kissing his skin softly; small pecks and affectionate touches. He shivers, and his cock still pulses, but slowly, muscle by muscle, he relaxes too, ragged pants dissolving into hot, muted breaths. His arms around you loosen, holding now, not gripping. 

“Tell me when you want me to move,” you whisper against his ear, pressing a small kiss to the lobe. 

He nods, brushing his cheek against yours with a soft sigh. His hand moves from your back upward, until he cups the back of your head, drawing your lips back to his. It’s a soft kiss, loving; slow and sensual slides of wet skin mingling with gentle exhales. Before you know it, and before he says, you’re rolling your hips greedily, just grinding against him for now. 

A guttural sound leaves his lips. His forehead feels hot and sticky pressed against yours like this, a strand of his hair tickling your cheek. 

You feel his thighs shift, widening as far as the slacks still around his thighs can allow, feet planted more firmly into the carpet. The first roll of his hips is disjointed, off rhythm with your own, but the slight drag of his cock against your walls has you moaning brokenly. The second roll, a little more confident, has you pressing your hips down to meet it, and your back arches like a cat.

“Fuck yes,” you moan, your voice thick and throaty. You moan his name, wait for the third shallow thrust, and meet it. “You feel so fucking good.” 

He looks up at you like you hung the stars, his eyes widening at the sound of his name tumbling past your lips like a fractured halo. He loses his rhythm, but you soon pick it back up for him, starting to use your thighs to slide more eagerly down his cock. It’s still shallow, Nanami’s arms around your waist preventing you from really going for it, but you’re unwilling to part from the closeness for now. 

You bounce a few inches at a time, the dull clap of your hips and the lewd squelch of your hot cunt wrapped tight around him filling the air of the apartment. With each bounce, a grunt pushes out from his chest, hot breath fanning across your face. 

Nanami, though inexperienced, starts to let his body guide him. His hips buck up to meet you more confidently, and the growing force of his movements has you keening, fingernails biting into his shoulders. 

You look square into his hooded eyes, breath mingling, and see the flush across his skin, his lips glistening with saliva. You moan again, higher pitched this time, and Nanami’s next thrust has you jolting up a little, nose bumping against his. You clench around him again, and his brow knits together. 

“S-Shit,” he pants, his hips starting to jolt more readily, pushing a little too forcefully into you, quickly losing his rhythm. “I’m not… I’m not going to last…” His movements quicken, grow more erratic, and you’re not even sure he realises. “… you’re so fucking… tight.” 

The last part is little more than a throaty whisper, his voice cracking. You stop meeting his thrusts and instead, widen your stance, tighten your core, and let him take what he needs. The movement, though small, isn’t lost on him, and he looks up at you, emotion swimming heavily in his dark gaze. 

He thrusts up grow more erratic, sloppier, something like a grunt leaving his mouth with every dull thwap of his hips against your ass. His arms tighten around you, fingertips pressing into your skin. A groan, a hiss, and a swallow. The couch creaks and strains. 

“N-Next time - hah - next time… I want t-to feel you cum around me,” he pants, his arms starting to shake. “I’ll give you everything, anything, fuck, I-I’ll keep going until… until… God-“ 

He’s barely pulling out now, a mere inch is all he’s moving, the head of his cock bullying against the soft spot right next to your cervix. Choked, high-pitch moans are the only sounds you can make, and you distantly note you’ve never sounded like before. Not ever. 

You’re getting there, you realise. Not quite close, and definitely not as close as him, but the way his cock fits inside you, the slap of his hips against you, the way he’s looking at you… it’s pushing you there fast. 

But it’s not quite enough. 

“I’m close,” he gasps. “I… where…” 

“Inside,” you reply without hesitation. Something passes by his eyes, a small flicker of concern, perhaps, swimming in the sea of lust and arousal. You try to find your bearings enough to tell him it’s okay, you wouldn’t have taken him inside if you weren’t protected-

-but then his cock is twitching inside you, and Nanami is shaking, shaking underneath you, his thighs jolting, nearly bucking you off his lap altogether. 

With one last slam of his hips against you, buried as deep as he could possibly ago, a long, primal groan leaves him. It’s deep, visceral, easily mistaken for something pained - and it might be the most divine fucking sound you’ve ever heard in your life. 

He buries his face against your throat as his hips buck involuntarily a few times, and you shiver as you feel that familiar warmth bloom inside you. He’s giving you everything, or what feels like it. Your pussy flutters around him, and his fingertips press into you so tight you wouldn’t be surprised to see bruises. 

His heart is hammering against your chest, the thump pounding even in your own chest. Ragged pants and a heavy quiet settles over the living room. His cock continues to twitch inside you, growing weaker with every thud of his heart. 

Nanami doesn’t pull his head from your throat for a long while, his nose pressing into your skin as he pants against you. 

After a moment, he finally swallows. “… I’m sorry,” he mutters. “I… I should have made you-“ 

“Shut up,” you murmur against his warm hair, breathing in the faint scent of sweat and his shampoo. He seems to get the picture, of what you were trying to say. He always did. “Next time,” you add anyway, just to be sure. 

He lifts his head from your skin, looking up at you blearily. You smile fondly as you see his face again, the harsh lines on his brow and his eyes smoother now, no longer creased as they always seemed to be. He looks… so much younger, you think, like this. Relaxed. Sated. 

You brush some of his sweaty hair out of his face, and his eyelids flutter at the brief contact. He seems exhausted, you think.

“I meant what I said,” he murmurs as he looks up at you. “I don’t want this to…” His palm moves against your back, sliding down your spine. “I want you. Properly. I always have.” He swallows. “Always.” 

Your eyes soften. He looks at you expectantly, almost vulnerably. 

“You have me,” you murmur in reply, finally. “Properly.” 

A small smile tugs at his lips, and it’s warmer than you’ve ever seen before. Genuine. Light. It’s as if a decade of weight lifts from his broad shoulders, if only briefly. 

He pulls you close once more, his lips pressing against yours softly, lovingly, and the world seems to fade away. 

For now, of course. 

masterlist.

[stormblessed95]

Watching Are You Sure?! EP 1

A reminder of how I do these reaction posts as I watch things. I just write my reactions and thoughts down literally as a happen. Think more of a bullet point format. I'll include links when I can to videos, thanks to the people who twt who upload clips. And at the end, I'll do a better wrap up of all my opinions. I hope everyone enjoyed the show so far!!

The episode starts with Jimin showing up right before JKs GMA performance and interview, July 14th 2023.

Them meeting up and talking about how he has his performance in NY on GMA later. Jimin saying that he hadn't seen him in a while, their schedules kept them SO BUSY 😭😭 this trip was so good for them. And the way he caressed JKs throat and told him to rest his voice and take care of it since it had been hurting. 🥺 So many soft touches too as soon as they were able to see each other again. And we didn't even get to see their actual reunion.

JK packing up his hotel room and talking about how he never traveled so freely before. They are so sweet and so busy and I'm so glad they were able to carve out even just a few weekends for time to themselves. And the way when the staff was talking to them about plans and who would drive etc, JK said he would drive and was just sitting there talking about traffic while they were holding hands interlocked resting in Jimins lap 😭 that's so??!!

Then fighting over the AC in the car in efforts to take care of the other is so cute. Jimin wanting to make sure JKs throat stayed okay, JK not wanting Jimin to get sick. They baby the heck out of each other. And Jimin watching his GMA performance on his phone 🥰 JKs cute smile while Jimin was jamming out to his music 🥺

"JungJi" new ship name alert?! Lmao!

JK ordering for the table 💜

The absolute bickering over who is a bad driver/bad at parking. The get out. Lmao the way they absolutely irritate each other on purpose is amazing and soooo best friends/might as well be married behavior 😂🤣

When they went shopping together and JK said they should buy the same shorts together 😍🥰 matchy matchy always!!

And an ARMY recognized them and saying hello and they were so cutely excited about it. "We've still got it." 😍🥺🥰

JK ordering for them again at the brewery 🥰 and I love that they went to an LGBTQ friendly brewery for one of their first hang out spots. Some ARMYs went and talked to the people working and said they everyone said Jikook were super polite, no one had recognized them and they kept to themselves a bit and just had some phones/go pros for recording.

The way that they also started talking about how this was their trip before military service. And how JK started bonking Jimin over the head with his camera when he mentioned it. Jimin was giggling but you KNOW that they was emotional from it too. This was when they were thinking there was still a chance they would be separated for 2 years. I know they were anxious to get to cherish this time spent together. I know it meant SO much to them both and probably so much to JK that Jimin traveled all this way and made it happen.

The way that JKs kayak tipped over immediately and Jimin just was cackling as he continued to paddle away and the staff were fishing JK out of the lake 🤣🤣🤣 just for JK to furiously row up on him and be like "you have your phone?? Tip over!!" 🤣🤣 They are so funny and cute! And Jimin taking a photo of his baby 💜 the way Jimin spent the whole time on the water just laughing and smiling fondly at everything JK would do. It's so freaking sweet. They just really had so much fun together being silly and goofy.

Not Jimin giving JK the "you come here often?" Pick up line and the immediate roleplay they both get into 😅🤣😂 they really can't go too long without at least a little bit of flirting lol

We know there was a getaway cabin with a 2 bed option but Jikook picked the one with just one bed. Lmfao good for them. Hey BH, we know you have no issues with filming the members while they sleep, even while they share the bed. How come we got zero footage of Jikook sharing the bed? 😂😂

Jimin being like "JK, you are a good cook 🥺" and Jungkook just immediately getting to work on cooking them dinner 🥺💜 although when Jimin asked for a taste, why did JK feed him from his FINGER?! Lmfao and what the hell was the noise he made when Jimin licked his finger 😂🤣 half moan, half laugh? I don't even know lmao

And the way he ran to go feed Jimin a piece of the chicken because he was proud of how his cooking was turning out. Sooo cute. Jimin accidentally dropped a piece of chicken and acted like he committed a great offence 😭😂 the way they spilt dinner duties though was so cutely domestic.

JK speaking directly to the camera to speak to the viewers. Man has done too many hours long live streams. Lmao he is too used to just chatting with ARMYs 🤣😂 that was adorable and Jimin thought so too. And the way Jimin goes "I miss V" and JK immediately is like "let's call him!" Anything to make Jimin smile! But they clearly cut so much of that convo, BH, give me my members loving each other istg I miss them too much. And don't even get me started on the yoonminkook conversation. I genuinely almost teared up. I miss BTS so much 😭 their laughter is healing

Jimin getting a stomach bug 😭😭 my poor baby. And the screen just going black while Jikook cuddle?? The give us minimal Audio and a black screen and then they cut away entirely and we KNOW they are cuddling. Lmfao TF BH!! We know they cuddle, where is my fanservice?! And JK turned over at some point and elbowed Jimin in the nose. You KNOW they were all up in each other's business on that bed for that to happen 😂😂😂

And my poor Jimmie... He feels so bad 😭😭 JK is taking such sweet care of him though.

JK outside stacking rocks while Jimin rests is giving me Yumi vibes. Lmfao I love him (and her!) SO MUCH! The way he prayed after too for a good trip with Jimin. The rock tower is also (correct me here if needed) a way to pray for someone's health and well-being. My poor sick Jiminie. Yumi also used the rock towers as ways to pray and communicate with her Gods.

Wrap up thoughts?

Not much I haven't already said honestly. Lol but just more emphasis on how special this trip is, both to Jikook themselves and for us to have it shared with us. This IS comfort TV. They bring each other such peace and happiness. They both banter and tease and have such fun. They both baby the heck out of the other. JK taking care of a sick Jimin was soooo nice seeing. The way Jimin wasn't feeling good, but rallied in order to have a good time for their weekend away.

It's also interesting that so much of this is honestly filmed from GoPro. They have some staff and crew there, but from what I've seen it's a smaller number than normally goes to film these shows and they are left alone with just installed cameras fairly often. That's extra nice for them. 💜

I am and forever will be salty about all the cuts. The Tae face time was cut short, the cuddling was cut, so much was cut. Which duh, I get why. But I still want more 😂 looking forward to the behinds to see if we get anything more. That black screen cut from them cuddling though was 👀👀😂😂

JK was such a good leader and took charge so much so far this trip. It was cool to see, Jimin ALSO thought so! The way he was speak for both of them, drove them around, ordered food and drinks for them, gave dinner prep instructions. Gave Jimin his medicine.... I'm not saying it's hyung behavior.... But... Lol also I did notice that there was a pretty even split of address between him calling Jimin hyung, or just by his name. Along with all the little random bits of flirting sprinkled through the episode lol so cute..

Hope you guys enjoyed it!! And thanks for reading all my random thoughts! Onto episode 2!

[kisses4kaia]

Charlie walker x reader smut where he’s very subby and unexpirienced

thank you 🧎🏻‍♀️

a/n; omgomg absolutely r u kidding me rn ? fem reader. obvi 17+ and intended for mature audiences .

movie night 💿 - c, walker ,,

it's crazy what an innocent movie night at kirby's can end up as.

you and charlie sat in opposite corners of the spacious living room, watching stab III (per charlie's insistence). it had just started and you were already bored. the movie wasn't bad, per se, you had just seen it so many times before.

and well, you had always found charlie walker more interesting.

you'd always thought of him as attractive, having spent many a night with your fingers deep inside of you, imagining they were his, imagining what he would sound like, whimpering for you and your touch.

you knew he felt the same, if not, similar, about you. from the way he insisted on walking up the stairs after you (iykyk), to the untrackable count of times you've caught him eyeing you up and down, as though he was praying he would be gifted by the gods with x-ray vision.

but every time you got too close, he'd shut it down with a friendly remark. every. damn. time.

"that's actually really nice of you, thanks y/n,"

"haha, you don't mean that. funny, though."

"i think you look pretty nice, too,"

it drove you crazy, just how oblivious he was to your advances. the way the tv screen lit up his blown pupils, fascinated as he watched one of his favorite movies for probably the 1,000th time, made you bite your lip to contain the anything-but-holy thoughts ravaging your mind.

you were tired of sitting around, doing nothing about this ever-growing crush.

whilst everybody had their eyes glued to the screen, watching some girl get chased through her home, you pulled out your small iphone and clicked on charlie's contact. you had to do something he couldn't ignore, something he couldn't look over.

you clicked on the option to attach a photo to the text message. you scrolled through your camera roll until you found it.

the photo was of you, in your bedroom, in your mirror, seemingly trying on lacy, dark purple, lingerie. there was no shot he was taking this with friendly intentions.

you to charlieee <33 : *(1) attachment*

you waited a few moments before texting him again

you to charlieee <33 : oops, wrong person . sry. 😊

you watched as he reached for his back pocket at the sound of a notification.

and how his face, once painted with curiosity, twisted into shock, sights forced on the device. you had to bite back a smirk as he looked up at you.

you pretended that you were watching the movie and gave no attention to the boy whose pants were getting tighter by the second.

he cleared his throat before settling back on the couch, typing out a reply.

charlie to y/n🤩 : it's okay haha

charlie to y/n🤩 : do you mind me asking who that was meant for?

you to charlieee <33 : why does that matter 2 u?

charlie to y/n🤩 : i just want to know if you're seeing someone, or if it was for jill or kirby, yk?

charlie to y/n🤩 : not that i care if you're seeing someone!! that's really one of my business, forget i said anything

you to charlieee <33 : lmao but char, its ok if u do

charlie to y/n🤩 : what do you mean by that?

you to charlieee <33 : follow me and find out ;)

you casually got up and exited the living room, successfully not turning any heads. you found the guest bathroom and entered.

it was actually very nice, the lights were bright and luminescent, and the shower, sink, and toilet were spotless.

you waited a few minutes, sitting on the sink counter, before the door opened, revealing the one and only.

"what took you so long?" you teased flashing a smile. "i was debating whether or not i actually wanted this, well i do want this, very much so, but i was just-" he was rambling.

"well, you're here now, aren't you, charlie?" you slightly whispered before pulling him towards you by his shirt, settling in between your legs.

he was stiff as a board, he didn't know what he could do. you noticed this and grabbed his hands from his sides and placed them lowly on your waist.

you placed your arms around his neck very lazily. "you want this?" you looked into his eyes, which were dazed and hazy, seemingly drowning in dopamine.

he nodded. "mhm, yeah," he was breathless, becoming so impatient, needing to feel your lips on his.

you chuckled softly to yourself before finally giving the boy what he wanted. the kiss started out slow but heated up quickly as you started to tangle your fingers in his hair.

you swiped your tongue along his bottom lip and his mouth fell open easily, allowing it in.

charlie gripped your hips tightly. "easy, tiger. i'm not going anywhere," you pulled away slightly to say. this did not make him let up. there were surely going to be bruises in the place of his hands by tomorrow.

you began kissing down his jaw and neck, exploring and searching for a sweet spot. he whimpered particularly needily at one area on his collarbone and you attacked it.

he began running his hands up and down your sides, underneath your shirt. you translated his wandering hands and helped throw your top off. he tried, truly, to keep his eyes on your face and not on your chest but how could he? <33

"so, so, so beautiful," he whispered, leaning down slightly to knead your covered breasts. "too many clothes, baby. take 'em off for me, hm?" you more told him than asked.

like the good boy he wanted to be for you, charlie was quick to remove every garment on his body, save for his boxers.

you pulled your miniskirt off and were left in a laced, pale pinky-shade of matching bra and panties.

he took a small step back and stared at you intensely, like he wanted to say something. "spit it out, char." you almost scolded him.

"i-it's just, um, i've n-never done anything like this... before..." he looked down as though it was a shameful thing.

you smiled at his tenderness. "c'mere, love," you quietly uttered before pulling him in between your legs once again. you felt his hard length pressed against your middle but ignored the euphoria to focus on what mattered.

"look at me, char. that does not make me want you any less, it's actually kinda cute. listen, i'll guide you through it, if you wish to continue, that is. if you don't, we can get dressed and leave like nothing happened. what do you want to do, baby?" you reassured him as he stared into your eyes thoughtfully.

"i wanna keep going," he breathed out. "good," you hummed, drawing his lips to yours again. you hopped off of the counter, forcing your lips apart by the sheer height difference between you two.

you pushed him against the bathroom door and lowered yourself onto your knees in front of him. "w-what are you doing?!" he panicked slightly. "i'm gonna take real good care of you, m'kay, love? now, be a good boy for me and relax," you purred, rubbing your hands up and down his thighs.

the pet name turned his stomach and made him slip a small whimper. he unfroze his muscles and relaxed, per your request.

you kept your doe eyes on the flushed boy's face as your pulled his boxers down, making his dick spring out, hitting his stomach.

you tore your eyes from his face and focused your attention on his member.

he was big, huge. his slit crying with precum and veins ran up and down the length of it. your wide eyes softened when you heard a needy whine coming from the man above you.

you decided he's waited long enough, so you ran your tongue along the underside of his cock. the moan/groan he let out, made you smile, and lock eyes with charlie once again.

"fuck, feels good," he said through half-lidded eyes as you began to suck on his angry, red, tip.

"so vulgar. bad boy," you teased with a grin. the sight of you beneath him, on your knees, a smile bigger than the whole sky plastered across your face as his dick leaned against your chin, could've caused him to release a load on your pretty face right there.

but he didn't. he wanted, needed, to be your good, good, boy <3.

"mmm, no. i'm good, i'm so good, only for you. just for you, mommy," the name merely slipped out, he swore, but it caused you to moan whilst his dick was down your throat, causing a very pleasurable vibration around his cock, causing him to involuntarily cum down your throat.

"sh-shit, 'm sorry," he was quick to apologize for cumming so quickly as you pull your jaw off of him. "say that again," you demanded with a scratchy voice, but needier undertones were detected. "w-what, i'm sorry?"

"no, before that,"

"m-mommy?" charlie squeaked.

"fuck."

from the cold tiles biting at the skin of your knees to shimmying off your panties and sitting back down on the counter, you knew you needed him, all of him. right here, right now.

this time, you didn't have to pull him toward you, he naturally gravitated to the comfort of the in-between of your plush thighs. "wanna fuck me? huh?" you asked, grabbing his cock and sliding the tip up and down your folds.

"more than anything, mommy," he whimpered, dreamily. "fuck, baby," you whined as you guided him inside of you.

the stretch was almost impossible. you both moan in synchrony. the tightness of your walls was far better than charlie could've ever imagined when he pumped his fist up and down his length on lonely nights.

"oh my god, momma. i've dreamed and dreamed about this," he whispered in your ear after you gave him the go-ahead to move. his thrusts started out slow and tame but sped up quickly.

the hold he had on your thighs was mighty as he chased his high. "gimme your hand," you managed to speak through the ecstasy. "w-why?" he slowed down, only slightly.

"just- just give it to me," you gasped as his tip pushed against your g-spot. he lifted his left hand and put it in your right.

you shaped it into a 'thumbs up' stance and moved in down onto your clit. "draw circles," you told him. he picked it up quickly and continued fucking you.

your nailed fingers tugged and pulled at his hair, making him into a moaning, whimpering, mess. "shit, fuck! i can't go for much longer. can i please do it inside? please, please, please, mommy?" he begged and you nodded. "i'm on the pill, doll. go ahead, fill me up." you couldn't say no to his beautiful, fucked out, face.

a few more sloppy thrusts into your cunt and soon, he had you loaded. he stared down at his cock going in and out of you, lubed by his sperm, and he could've came again at the sight.

it wasn't too long after that you felt your own earth-shattering release, clinging onto the broad shoulders of the man above you. it rippled through you like an ocean current.

you stayed intertwined with each other for a few more moments, catching your breath, before charlie spoke.

"if my calculations are correct, roman bridgers should be getting revealed as ghostface right now."

[fereldanwench]

I didn't want to completely sit out a year-in-review, but for reasons I'll explain at the end of this post and under a cut, doing the traditional pick-one-pic-from-each-month approach just wasn't going to work for me. So instead, here are 20 of my favorite shots (in no particular order) of Valerie from 2023!

(I'll share solo Goro shots and shippy/story shots in two other posts before the year ends.)

Some thoughts about this year (cw for anxiety and depression mentions):

So yeah. I actually hadn't planned on joining in on the virtual photography year-in-review fun in part because... Well, frankly, I wasn't sure if it would actually be fun for me.

Although I do have pictures for every month, the first third, maybe even half, of the year was a struggle on almost every conceivable level. A lot of it was shit that carried over from the end of 2022, which was also an incredibly difficult year for me. I don't really want to delve too deeply into why--Some of it was personal, some of it was professional, some of it was fandom, and if you know, you know.

The main obstacle I had here is that looking at a lot of the shots I took from about January to May (give or take a few weeks on either end) honestly reminded me of Bad Times™️. I've worked really hard to pull myself out of that depression/anxiety cycle and return to a healthier approach to fandom and online socialization in general, but I just didn't want to spend a lot of time in that mental space. There are a few shots from those months that made it to my favorites, and I hope one day I can look back on that stuff and just feel the good from it again. Alas, that day is still not here.

But I am happy to report that the other reason I wanted to approach the review differently is a lot more positive! It's also two-fold: 1) I spent the earlier part of this year exploring more of a technical side of virtual photography and 2) I was really prolific the last third or so of this year so trying to narrow faves from about August until now was just not possible.

One of the few good things about the end of 2022 was being able to upgrade my graphics card, which meant I then had a rig that could support ray-tracing and hot sampling. As a result, I started putting a lot more focus on lighting and getting acquainted with new tools. I also was trying to work with the new AMM posing system, which is very convenient in some ways (100s of poses without reloading the game!) and a complete pain in the ass in others (can't move characters without their poses breaking!). Custom photomode poses + Nibbles Replacer has been the game changer I've been waiting for.

Or to put it more succinctly, December 2022 through about April 2023 felt like a relearning/return to basics kind of creative period, which is essential, but also means I just don't really like a lot of what I did, lmao.

Then, shockingly (I'm not shocked at all), starting treatment for my anxiety and depression in the second half of this year suddenly made creating a lot easier and fun again! Crazy how that works.

Even bumping this little review up to 20 shots instead of 12, there are still pictures from the past few months that I had to cut as favorites. There was just no way I could condense the amount of fave shots I took from August to now in just 5 options.

I also owe quite a bit of this revival to modders for asking me if I wanted to take shots for them--Exploring more of a fashion photography approach to my shots I think did a lot to build on what I had learned earlier in the year and encouraged me to try something new. I don't want to tag anyone in this long-ass glorified diary entry, but if you invited me to take mod shots for you, just know that it really meant a lot. ♡

And that's where my head has been with a yearly review! Is filling out a little template with 12 pictures this serious? No, it definitely is not, lmao. But hey, overthinking shit is still something I'm working on. ✌️

[fumifooms]

With what we know of Chilchuck's daufhter's personalities; Who do you think would each daughter get along with best among their father's party members?

Alright so we got 4 options: Laios, Marcille, Senshi and Izutsumi.

Meijack

Immediately I think for Meijack it’d be Senshi. Yes yes, very ironic since she’s the only one not after his heart lol.

A lot of people consider her to be Chilchuck 2.0 but I don’t think that’s really true, she takes after her father in conscientiousness and profession yes, is the most serious and reserved of the daughters, but that’s the thing— I flip flop a bit on wether I think Chilchuck is an extrovert, introvert or just ambivert, he loves hanging out with people, but it’s distrust from past professional experiences plus boundaries due to drastic personal events that push him to avoid being open, especially since we see how cheery he used to be. With Meijack though… She’s an introvert, that’s it. She looks so so tired lmao. Chilchuck says it himself that she’s brusque/not personable. Obvi she might also have trauma that push her to be this and that way, but from what we see I think she’s just genuinely the type to stick to her business, be quiet and stick to her corner.

So why Senshi then? I think she’d gravitate towards him because he has the least overwhelming energy, Senshi can get fired up but mostly he tends to be laidback and gentle. While the others would be talking and arguing, Meijack would be sitting besides Senshi and helping him cook or tend to the fire, working in companiable silence. And if they do talk, I think they’d have nice conversations, Senshi giving life advice that affect her somewhat. Having a stable work and future is very important to Chilchuck and I’m sure he drilled that into his daughters as best as he could, so seeing Senshi thrive, the very opposite of a working responsible adult with a secure lifestyle aka an hermit hunting alone on the fringes of society, would be a wtf moment. If nothing else she’d be intrigued I think. I wasn’t even thinking of that but I do feel like she has daddy issues, if I had to write for her her arc would prob center on that, so in that way yay her getting a second, very different and uplifting father figure! 🎉 Senshi would be nothing but warm and happy to take her under his wing and chat, and much like with Chilchuck in the traps chapter would like learning a thing or two from her too.

Honorable mention to Izutsumi! I don’t think they’d hit it off which is why I didn’t pick her, but I think the people making fics about her and Izu interacting have the right idea, they’d clash at first I think especially on Izutsumi’s side since she’d see Meijack as a stick in the mud, and Meijack wouldn’t have a favorable impression either esp with how rude and irresponsible she is, but… I 100% believe that if they spent times together and got used to each other, to the point that Meijack understands Izutsumi somewhat and Izutsumi stops being prickly with her, that they’d develop an unlikely but strong companionship. Meijack’s section is already long so I’ll stop here but yes Meizu brotp

Flertom

Marcille. Next-

Ok jkjk, but also yeah I feel like this one is pretty self-evident. They share the same sort of emotive demeanor and social values, they both seemingly love gossips and romance, and most of all Flertom is very social. We see with her panel at her workplace, the tavern, that she cheerfully talks with customers, this girl is a social butterfly who loves talking and making new acquaintances. She values her family a lot as shown by her taking in her mom and sending her dad a letter alongside a gift, so they could even bond over having a broken off family or over trying to solve others’ problems hah. They’d have a grand old time getting to know each other and swapping stories (maybe even about her dad specifically) and I could totally see them starting to exchange letters even.

Honestly without reaching, the only thing I could see them arguing over is if Fler has a competitive streak, or if she’d think Marcille too uppity/academic on some occasions, but even then I think she’d appreciate Marcille’s elven princess flair and they’d both be too emotive to bottle shit up and let bad blood brew between them, althouuugh yeah they could totally give each other the silent treatment after arguing for a while hah. Chilchuck doesn’t help them reconcile, but he does tease both of them about it. They reach out to each other soon after and apologize, and laugh it off. "Haha my parents taught me what happens if you don’t communicate and aren’t willing to self-reflect and apologize haha" … Me just now realizing that maybe this is how Marcille can get the details on the wife situation and the family dynamics, tho idk at which point, on one hand I could see Flertom being pretty flippant over it but on the other I can imagine it’d be a very personal and sensitive topic. Who knows if she’s had friends to vent to about the stress of the divorce- oh pardon, "separation"— But I do think she’s the kind that it’d really help to talk it out and vent, AND YET I do think with my family hcs that Flertom tended to take it on herself to help around the house and be an emotional support glue with her sisters and would notice the strained parts about her parents’ relationship so she’d have kinda grown being able to bottle her emotions up a bit… Okok I’m done, next fr this time.

Puckpatti

Ok imo she’s the hardest to pin down, and that’s a part of why she’s my fave. Because of her being optimistic and cheerful I tend to compare her to Marcille a lot, but beyond that they aren’t all that similar, even if Puck also is interested in romance like Fler. She has a bunch of stuff that’s implied, like her working in scams, but they’re all under like, layers of interpretation. She’s shown to be cheerful and allegedly careless, happy-go-lucky, a bit of a ditzy, and although Chilchuck isn’t necessarily an accurate judge of character about it even, what we’re shown with that is that she worked selling "dragon dung" for a while and it’s implied she switches jobs regularly. What Chilchuck’s saying about her being reckless and too optimistic is probably about her not having a stable career, reliable work & income. Before the new comic from the Complete Adventurer’s Bible that was all we could glean from personality wise, but now we can see she’s also direct, and she’s emotive though not as much as Flertom, and she’s quick to scheme, not oblivious at all and sharing a conspiratorial spark with her sister. I’d describe her as laidback, here for a good time not a long time, ambtious and self-driven, and doesn’t let obstacles scare her or keep her down. She’s like….. Is she like, a cheerful Mickbell. A little scamp.

… Ok what now. Honestly Laios and Izutsumi tie with each other in my heart. I think she’d enjoy conversations with Laios and would find him fun/entertaining to be around, would like when he gets excitable and fired up. Puck seems like she might try her shot to get romantically involved with him, but maybe while doing that she sees something in him that’s worth hanging around to even if for platonic reasons, but mostly I think they’d be like friendly acquaintances. I honestly personally don’t see Puck being all that into making deep friendships, I get the sense that her life’s a lot about herself and where she wants to go next, so friendships would also be oriented towards having a fun time and not as much like, deep emotional connections. But the Izutsumi angle… Izu is the cool rebellious older sister. Izutsumi’s brutish and unruly free spirit attitude have her enraptured. She wants to hang around her because Puck thinks she’s cool and lowkey admires her, and thinks she’s fun and a good influence to have around. Finally someone who Gets It, to go on shenanigan adventures with. I think Izutsumi would also be interested by her, in a big part because unlike her party members, Puckpatti would be interested in following her as she does her thing, encouraging her in whatever she does even, unlike Chilchuck Laios and Senshi who kept trying to instill in her values and lessons and looking after her so she doesn’t do something reckless. Izutsumi notices early on that Puck’s easy to have around, nice even, and from there on Puck couldn’t get rid of the cat that took a liking to her even if she tried. Izutsumi brings her dead birds and stuff like "Hey Patti look at this isn’t it rad!" and Puck is like absolutely, you rock. Oh maybe Puck would want to run some scams together tbh, because of her ninja/stealth skills or otherwise. Anyways yes devil-may-care troublemakers duo, the bane of Chilchuck’s existence.

Yeah I think Izutsumi is Chil’s fourth daughter and she should have a bond with all the daughters <3 Flertom’s the sis you go to if you need comfort, and she accepts Izu easily into their circle.

Between worrying about maybe his oldest and most serious thinking about courting Senshi (she’s not), Flertom teaming up with the nosiest and loudest friend he has and the duo of reckless agitators about to get in all kinds of trouble, Chilchuck is truly sandwiched by horror and agony.

[nanami-is-nanamean]

for literal years (i have no sense of time, its honestly probably just half a year but i could be horrifically wrong—i blame covid for destroying it), i have had this... au. where i just. put nanami. in hsr.

like—instead of caelus or stella being the mc, nanami is and thats whats hes been doing all those years when he was away from sorcery. i do hc that he spent at least one year as a salaryman to get that signature "my soul has been sucked out by capitalism" look and "we should reform society to be better" mindset lmao

i imagine that like—the way it works is that everything happens roughly the same in the main story, its just the little minute differences that change kinda like how everyones playthru of hsr is slightly different because we chose diff dialogue options or whatever

so like—he goes thru belobog, goes thru the xianzhou, goes thru penacony, and then all the side quests, and thats when he decides to go back home (did i base it off my own hsr progress? haha... yeah. lmao)

i dont know who exactly he goes down back to earth with but i do have this one scene in my head where he meets up with himeko. and as much as i like the idea of him going down alone, i dont think the express is gonna let him lmao. best i can imagine is march and welt. welt because this is the most similar to his old home of hi3 (which i want to play so bad but alas i have a life), and march because she serves as a nice contrast to the low energies of nanami and welt AHAHA

i did consider benching her since shes been going to expeditions nonstop but like—the contrast gotta b there honey, thats what you call good writing and good character dynamic lmao. but yeah—he goes down, calls up gojo, and welt and march go off to fuck about.

i imagine that gojos fuckin stunned to see him after so many years because like—he was working a dead end job and then one day he fucking disappears. and it would scare gojo too since like, his entire thing is being able to see things, to percieve things, and as op as gojo is, im p sure he isnt able to see far enough to find nanami in the cold and dark depths of space. all he knows is—he was there, and then, his cursed energy disappears like a candle that went out. all he can assume is that he died or some curse users got to him. but if he died, a sorcerer of his caliber would produce a CRAZY curse spirit. and if curse users got to him, there would be some sort of trace or destruction left behind as a trail because nanami wont go that easy and if he did turn into a curse user, he would be able to pick up the curse energy residue.

so now here he is, back infront of him like some kind of disappearing act AND with some strange and crazy energy inside him. like a fucked up star or black hole or something. somethings obviously happened to him, and if the weird disappearance and reappearance or the weird-ass thing inside him didnt clue him in—he would rip out his own eyes. and he KNOWS that is this nanami because the Six Eyes never lie. (hehe kenjaku prison realm moment)

so now hes tasked with figuring out what the fuck happened to nanami and what the fuck that pulsing thing inside him is—but hes conflicted about it because jesus christ, it was just him and ieiri for so long and theyre both so desperate and so happy to see an old friend again and—and they don't know if they can disregard whatever the fuck happened to him and if hes a threat, because god they missed him so much (hehe geto moment)

MEANWHILE march and welt are snooping around and they find a curse, which they easily defeat obviously and welt has... a WEIRD feeling about these "curses". like hes experienced facing this kind of energy before... so they go curse hunting a little bit more and holy shit. thats when welt realizes.

the reason why the curses and curse energy is so familiar is because he REALLY DID face this sort of energy before—and he faced that energy in the form of rAIDEN MEI WHEN SHE WAS WAVING AROUND HER NIHILITY ABILITIES. so now the express HAS to start meddling because the fucking NIHILITY is HERE and this world has been drowning in the powers of the nihility for actual fucking CENTURIES and at this point, and its going to be too goddamn predictable if theres a fucking stellaron causing it. (there isnt but theyre so used to it at this point lmao)

so yeah! thats my setup for an hsr x jjk crossover lmao

oh yeah its totes nanago AHAHHAHAHA—its implied but idk if it got thru KJHDFJLGkHSLK

[alltimefail-sims]

I present to you all... Wren's family!

Are you reading The Familiar by @mangosimoothie? You should be reading The Familiar by mangosimoothie and rooting for my baby Wren. (I'm mostly kidding - rooting for Wren is optional, but reading the Familiar is not 😉.)

This was probably self indulgent, and I definitely spent way too much time making them, but even if no one else cares... I'm pleased! I've been wanting to do this for way too long! First we have Wren's father, Dr. Abdou Opara and Wren's mother, Dr. Latita Opara (née Wiley). Then we have Wren's siblings Kingston and Angelique.

Want more info on them or to see their full-body outfits? Fear not...

Many details below the cut! ↓

If you read Wren's original post you already know that Abdou, Wren's father, is a retired engineer and tech investor while his wife, Latita, is the current and very popular mayor of San Myshuno. But I didn't really get to go into detail about Wren's siblings so I'm gonna do that real quick!!

Wren's oldest sibling, Kinston (30 y.o.), has a doctorate from Foxbury in biology, but he was also the captain of the robotics team and has a passion for engineering just like his father. After graduation he combined his two passions and created a bio-tech company that focuses on creating innovations and improvements in the medical field, particularly for surgical procedures and daily disability maneuverability and pain management. Wren thinks he's an absolutely insufferable ego-maniac, but they're not a completely reliable narrator because Kingston's just kind of a nerd with a little bit of a superiority complex (oldest child syndrome), but Wren's parents have always lifted up Kingston as the example and that's annoying as fuck! Oh and if Latita has a favorite child, it's Kingston (she's never proclaimed a favorite out loud but like... it's pretty clear).

Then there's the Opara's middle child, Angelique (27 y.o.), who I promise does not just walk around in pageant crowns and evening gowns (although that would be iconic imo). Although a middle child, Angelique has never had to fight for attention and is Abdou's clear favorite (again he's never said it out loud but like... he's even more obvious). She has a distinguished psychology degree with honors from Foxbury Institute and graduated at the top of her class. The reason she's dressed in pageant-wear is because she recently won the title of Miss America (whatever the sims equivalent is called). She'll be competing for Miss Universe next because she's a bad bitch ig? Lmao. She just is very competitive. Wren thinks Angelique is generally less insufferable than Kingston, but the two of them in a room together is like nails on a chalkboard to Wren. Wren and Angelique are a little closer, but "close" as in like... they get along okay, they'll pick up *if* the other calls, and she nags Wren the least of any of their family members (but that's just because she "has better things to do"). That being said, she does call Wren "baby Wren" which drives them nuts (but she's being affectionate in her own way).

*Fun fact: all of the Oparas are Foxbury alum except for our dear Wren and they never hear the end of it!

*Also a fun fact but, needless to say, Wren's mom doesn't want to end her political career as a mayor: she's working her way up the political ladder to the presidential candidacy, babyyyyy!!! On the flip-side, Abdou has always been a strict parent who cares about "legacy" and that's why they're so anal about protecting the family's public image and why they're especially hard on Wren who thinks all of those things are kind of bullshit.

FINALLY, I do want to note that I didn't include one *technical* family member, Kingston's college sweetheart and fiancé Kasi who Wren actually enjoys being around and thinks is way out of their brother's league.

Anyway okay I'm done now here they are side-by-side as promised:

Irl I imagine their heights to vary (with Wren being taller than their mom but shorter than everyone else) but I was too lazy to use a height slider.

Okay NOW I'm done for real lmao byeeeeeeee

[decepti-thots]

not a meme question, but do you have a favorite pen? i don't know anything about them but you seem to, lol

I do, but my answer will differ depending on if you're asking my personal favourite pen or if you want advice as someone who doesn't use FPs as to what a good way to try one out is, anon! (sorry you just ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD)

I currently have six fountain pens, five of which are 'starter'/budget pens and one of which is a mid-range 'enthusiast' pen. My favourite I own is the latter. It's my Nahvalur Original, which I own in the Spring colour, and which cost me around £45. It's a pen designed to exclusively take bottled ink with a fancy filling mechanism, instead of ink cartridges. It's not high end by the standards of fountain pens, per se, but it's solidly in the 'enthusiast' realm. (My Dad, who once owned an FP because he needed something that looked good while signing Important Work Documents, did a double take when I told him how much it was, lmao. He did not ever spend that much on one pen.) It is a hefty, lovely thing with great build quality which I can use with fancy ink and feels great to write with. Nice nib, great quality, looks awesome.

But if you have never used a fountain pen, and want to try it, you do not need to spend over £20 or your local equivalent, fwiw. Many cheap fountain pens suck, but equally, many people who have spent thirty years collecting them who own pens worth hundreds will happily tell you, many cheap fountain pens are excellent, and noone needs to spend much to get an industry-gold-standard one. My second favourite pen is my Pilot Kakuno, which is aimed mostly at schoolkids in Japan where Pilot are based, can be bought for under twenty pounds shipped in the UK, similar prices in most of the world, and writes better than multiple 'adult' pens I own. Because Pilot has incredible high quality pen nibs and the Japanese FP market is competitive. You could easily buy just a Kakuno and be set forever with a pen that is extremely good quality! And there's other similarly great options too; there's a whole section of the market that is just 'good pens for newbies'. The Lamy Safari is a very famous option from a western (german) brand, for example. (Also have one of those, it's good.)

If you want to try fancy fountain pen inks with special qualities like sparkle or sheen, you'll probably need to put down a little extra money for a converter- basically a refillable cartridge that refills from a little ink bottle, instead of the disposable ones most stationary shops sell. But you don't need that if you're happy with the normal ink cartridges. All cheap fountain pens accept cartridges, though the better brands do tend to require you buy their cartridges, unfortunately.

And if you REALLY don't want to risk it: buy a Platinum Preppy. Platinum are a very well regarded brand, they use the same nibs in their entry level pens as they do their £30 ones, just with cheaper gel pen like bodies- and they are like. £5. Comes with a cartridge. Writes great, I own one. Again, a Japanese brand aimed squarely at schoolkids, very cheap but genuinely good to write with.

(The one thing for fountain pens I would say is, do spend the extra little bit on a cheap notebook with fountain pen friendly paper. Same as with e.g. paints, good paper is more important than the pen a lot of the time. The worst fountain pen in the world on good paper is better than a £500 pen on shit paper. Here is a guide; I use Clairefontaine.)

anyway sorry maybe you didn't want all of that. but if you think fountain pens sound Interesting and are curious, i'd encourage you to try one, but buy cheap. many cheap pens rule. and fountain pens are great- they are better than almost every other kind of pen for doing longform writing, because they don't cause wrist strain when doing it for long periods. i would definitely recommend a fountain pen over other kinds if you want to use it to write for long periods, no matter what pen you get, tbh!

[pinkcarsupremacy]

i completely agree with you about esteban, despite being alpine's first winner and literally being born and raised in normandy, never actually being embraced by the higher ups and have actually felt that way for a long time. here's how i see things:

cyril - dickmatized by daniel

otmar - accepts bribes and hates the working classs (jk jk...unless? but also this)

rossi - whatever the fuck this was about

bruno - ...do i even have to say anything?

...and is it really a coincidence that marcin, the only team principal/ceo i didn't mention above, was leading when alpine was at their peak? i think not!

Yeah it's a bizzare state of affairs over there... it probably doesn't help that the team is already run in a weirdass way (controlled by ceo board & work being split between 2 countries) before even getting into whoever the team principal of the day is.

I've always assumed the team's higher up dislike of Ocon came from the fact they're not even in charge of their own driver because Mercedes manage him. He's in a very unique situation where he's being managed by a team that has absolutely no connection to the team he races for and is in fact one of their competitors. Like when George was at Williams or if Bearman goes to Haas you can point at them and explain that yes they are part of other teams' junior programmes but they are racing for a team that uses their junior team as an engine supplier so they have that existing relationship to be sharing drivers.

Alpine on the other hand are a works team and make their own admittedly godawful engine so it's a bit strange for them to sort of be beholden to Mercedes in this way by virtue of them telling Ocon where to go. Compare his situation to Alonso who wasn't tied down to any other teams by contract or to Piastri who was Alpine's own junior driver or Gasly who Alpine spent a lot of money on buying his contract out from Red Bull so he wouldn't have any connection to them anymore and you can see why Ocon would be a less favourable option than all 3 of them management wise.

As for TPs well Cyril sort of pretended Ocon didn't exist at all which arguably is better than whatever is happening now. Otmar was too busy trying to show the media that they treat both drivers equally (him on Sky Sports F1 broadcast in Monaco last year was so funny... they asked him about Ocon's podium and he just started talking about Pierre). I've never been able to pin Otmar's thoughts on Ocon down actually despite the fact they worked together for 2 years in Force India as well. What I will say is he was a relatively calm team principal who wouldn't have reacted the way Famin did on live TV in Monaco this year. Rossi wasn't the team principal but he was the CEO which is why he was happy to slander the team to the press because like all upper management he has no idea how the job actually gets done. That being said I think admittedly he did like Esteban which might explain - with him gone - why the team have suddenly decided Ocon's their number one enemy now.

Marcin of course led Alpine's only good season and was kicked in favour of Otmar for some nonsensical reason. Jokes on Alpine because that 2021 season was and is the best they're ever gonna achieve.

Famin I actually liked at the end of last year believe it or not lmao. Not sure what happened to him over the winter break but he seems to have woken up one day and decided Ocon is the root of all evil at Alpine despite the fact both of the drivers there are the only positive thing the team has going for them atm.

[ragnarokhound]

I’ve already left a comment on intricate rituals, but I just realized I forgot an important part. Having experience with toys but not other people is such a fun solution. My fave. Yes he can take it (yes you will be the first). The possessiveness of it all!!

But also from author’s perspective being like. Nah I don’t wanna deal with That. Absolutely valid <3

-🦇🐺

wAUGH THANK YOU!! <33

frank discussion about sex & the porny bits of my fic that got. really long somehow? below:

Hehehe yes - when I was writing, I hadn't necessarily intended that to be read as 'Tim's never bottomed before', but I realized belatedly that even if he's bottomed in the past, he certainly hasn't ever bottomed for an alpha >:3c

a lot of Jason's 'we don't have to, babe 🥺' came from anxiety about pushing for too much too fast as much as it came from the practical sentiment of 'knots are a lot to handle when ur body isn't made to take them' lmao

(because, well. look at his behavior for the entire fic, the boy spent six months gently boiling the frog of their relationship. the kind of wretched anxiety that spawns that behavior doesn't go away after one lousy love confession OTL TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE)

And Jason's been all up in Tim's business, so he KNOWS Tim hasn't been having a lot of sex because uh. He'd be able to smell it for one fjdslafjs and Tim would probably tell him about it for two fdjlafjk they talk about everything ugh they're soooo married in this fic it's disgusting lol

but like! Tim's never been with an alpha before!! of course he's never taken a real knot!! Jason would be the first OwO And it was one more way to shove another possessive omegaverse trope about Jason being jealous over Tim without it actually being awful fufufu

Hearing that Tim would be able to take his knot gave Jason extreme whiplash from 'wait what, how would you know that, who's been touCHING YOU' to 'holy fuck you've been prepping yourself? for me? that's so hot' and I am very here for any opportunity to indulge in possessive tropes with mostly just sexy consequences, especially with these two ;)

On another note, I genuinely think toys are great for testing out what you like, without fear of judgement and without worrying about 'doing well' or whatever. You can focus on yourself! You can see what works for you! You can discover your size kink-

- or lack thereof without it being tangled in complicated feelings or anxieties.

I looove the image of control freak Timothy Drake figuring himself out with toys once he knows that's an option (though imo he also doesn't give a fuck about what other people think enough that he'd be fine exploring with another person djslfa but i digress) and I love the image of control freak Timothy Drake wanting to experiment specifically with his partners to figure out all the ways they experience pleasure @_@ he wants to know how they're compatible, and he wants to know what makes them tick!!

*COUGH* anyway thank you!! I'm so glad you enjoyed the fic, and that you enjoyed that part specifically <33!!

[aeolianblues]

Honestly if one of the first things everyone knew about me was that I spent 35 years pining for one woman, and later said woman and her daughter because she married a long time ago, then forget the fact that she inspired a lot of my poetry, I would simply burn it all and bury myself from the burning embarrassment of being such a loser.

But such was the life of William Butler Yeats.

Every one of them had a Life eh? TS Eliot too— fascinating fear of decay and mortality. You see it in his work etc etc, but he also left his wife when she fell mentally ill, for a younger hot thing— some 20 y/o when he was in like his 40s or 60s. We see you running away from facing the inevitability, man, a profound line about death doesn’t change that.

So it’s fascinating to read their works with this background context available to you, it’s such an insight into the human psyche. You know I’ve talked about this a little before, on how we sort of look to our poets and songwriters for answers, to help make sense of all the madness, and without fail, they happen to be some of the most flawed human beings in history. Or in less intense cases, they don’t have the answers we seek from them. It reminds me again of that interview with Grian Chatten from Fontaines D.C., in the NME back in 2022. He’s a poet for the modern day, I’ll grant him that easily. He convinced me recently that lyrics can work quite well standing alone as poetry and not come off as naff or aloof, or can still feel quite prescient and not pretentious or removed from the live setting in which they will be performed, making eye contact with you in a sweaty theatre (slowly getting larger, pleased to see, with the U.K. and Dublin arena shows planned). They can still connect with the loud guitars and drums pounding behind them.

He said to the NME, in light of Dogrel and his painting of a Dublin life, presenting you with the characters, the contradictions, the scenarios lived in his Dublin, his portrayal led to people turning to him for answers, when I think what you and him would both know deep down is that you’re really looking to him for a depiction of your world in the words that hit the soul, in a way that romanticises the moments you want to remember, and can beautifully frame the injustices of the bad ones. Not answers. Just a painting.

He said, people are looking to me for answers. What the fuck do I know?

Same as it had always been, hasn’t it? He doesn’t have answers. Yeats didn’t have answers. TS Eliot didn’t have answers— despite his vivid depictions of loss and decay, he still couldn’t deal with the thought of it himself. But all it does do, is let you read a work through the lens of your own life, and then look at it again through the eyes of a complex human being, the poet. It’s an option that is available to you. Some people do subscribe to ‘death of the author’, but if you’d like to explore the mind of someone who isn’t you, if you aren’t afraid to feel uncomfortable, different, or in the skin of a very different person, it’ll open you up to new thoughts, which don’t have to be yours.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is, don’t be afraid to read something you don’t agree with. Bad thoughts aren’t contagious. You can approach someone else’s work knowing it’s a complex read, and that can be an intriguing and insightful read. However, I am absolutely not going to be putting this post in any poetry tags, because I don’t think most people on the poetry canon side of the internet will appreciate me calling one of the crown princes of 20th century Irish poetry and literature a loser. Lmao.

[toomuchracket]

something about an ikea date is just so comforting 😭😭 especially w/ ross 🥹🥹

ross strikes me as someone who goes into ikea with a plan of action that quickly falls by the wayside lmao. like i don't think he necessarily rushes you around, but he'll be like "love we really don't need kitchen stuff let's just look at them a bit quicker so we can get to what we actually need, yeah? alright"; the time you save looking in places you don't need to look too hard, though, is lost by ross taking his sweet time SCRUTINISING the things you do. like say you're going for a console table to put in the hallway of your house - ross is literally on his knees peering at the underside of every potential table to "see which is the most structurally sound". you're like "ross my darling they're all flat pack it's OUR job to make sure they're structurally sound when we build them lol" and he's like "ok but still! i need to check!"; you leave him be for a bit, and then help him pick one once he narrows your options down to the final two lol. and then ross checks his watch and blushes and goes "sorry i spent an hour here after rushing you through the kitchens baby" - he lets you take as long as you want looking in the fake bedrooms to make up for it, coming up behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist while you're fascinated by drawer dividers and whatnot. and then when you get to the market shop area bit, ross keeps adding little things into the trolley that he knows you'll like; candles, pretty wine glasses, a nice lamp, a flat pack drinks cart, picture shelves for you to display records and photos on... he spoils you, basically. to end the day, ross treats you to a little ice cream once you're through the till - you sit and eat them in the car, kissing the chocolate sauce stains from each other's lips before driving home contentedly <3

[finniestoncrane]

Heyo finnie!! Congrats on 1500 I'm so proud of you! I hope you have fun with this event and don't burn yourself out! You deserve nothing but the best! 💚💚

Anywho, I'm here for a blind date..., I've never been on one before but always been interested lol.

So...I know you already know like probably WAY TOO MUCH about me (more than you cared to EVER know lmao)and we're kinda similar hehe BUT I'm gonna try and describe myself for you anyhow lol

I'm a 24 year old woman who is often described as thoughtful, wise, and genuine. If I'm not writing, I'm drawing or vice versa. I'm usually creating or working on something! My interests often vary but they're usually centered around cartoons and comics! I love video games even though depending on the console I'm shit at them but enjoy the concepts and art that goes into them nonetheless! Basically I'm a socially anxious mess of a nerd that's trying her best lmao.

Hope this is decent enough that was really hard🥴😂

💜 blind date 💜 the kitchen is now closed! 🔞minors dni🔞 • masterlist • kofi link • tag: finnie1500 (to follow or to block) a/n: there were so many options i could have picked from ri but i knew in my heart EXACTLY who to send you on a date with💚

"Hello, and welcome to the Vill-Inn! Your date has been here getting things ready. I hope you weren't in the mood for soda and burgers, because he's ordered tiny sandwiches and a pot of tea for the table..."

As you approach your table, your date stands up and takes off his top hat, holding it in both hands in front of him nervously as he introduces himself.

"It's so wonderful to meet you! I'm Jervis."

You can tell he's impressed that he's made it through the whole sentence without stammering, and it's hard not to offer him a warm smile in return for his charming grin, punctuated by his protruding overbite.

He's quick to try and get to know you, but equally forthcoming about himself. And he mentions repeatedly how nice it is to have someone who is so polite and attentive, willing to give him so much attention.

Jervis is also extremely interested in your writing and art, especially taken by how creative you are. Like you have invented worlds to escape into on a whim.

"Why, you could have created as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

And when you broach the subject of Lewis Carroll, he's entranced by your knowledge, how much you know, how bright your eyes are when you talk about it. Which by the way, don't think he hasn't noticed your blonde hair and blue eyes. You'd make a wonderful Alice, truly. And though he wants to compliment you, he really is struggling to find the words.

"You do look marvellous, my dear. But I'm finding it difficult to put it into words. I think I could, if only I knew how to begin."

When you blush at his words, so poetic, so charming, he's completely besotted. Shy, unaware of how magnificent you are? It would be very easy for him to swoop in and claim you as his own.

For what feels like forever, he listens, eyes wide and holding his chest, as your tell him about your love of comics, games, and cartoons. Wonderous, joyous hobbies, escapism with whimsy, something he is familiar with himself.

The wait staff interrupt you though, and you realise that they're cleaning up around you. You wonder how long you've been talking, commenting on how it feels like only a moment you've spent with him. It's silly, but you tell him you hope that you haven't talked too much, or wasted the time to get to know him more as he was listening to you.

"If you knew time as well as I do, or how deeply intrigued by you I am, then you wouldn't talk about wasting it."