#speculating the level of horror and injuries and death

[thatisnotamistakewellbemaking]

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[your-lovely-rose]

If you’re here, you’ll want to order something. Don’t be shy. Below is a list of what you can ask for (I don't judge, and I’m fine with a lots of dark subjects) - it's a safe zone for everyone.

Before we begin: I won't be angry if one person fills my inbox. It is for you to send me your requests (even if there will be more than 10 or 50 or they even will appear every few minutes). Do you have another idea or do you want me to write you something else? Then send it to me.

Additionally, if you accidentally send me the same request several times (because you thought you deleted it by accident or for other reasons, I don't go into detail) I won’t be angry/upset. I understand that it can happen.

❥ Request Status: CLOSED!

❥ Day of publishing fanfics/requests: Friday

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☞ What I can write?

➵ Alphabet

➵ Headcanons

➵ Preference

➵ Scenarios

➵ Short story (One Shot, Drabble)

ⓘ ┆ Important note: Sometimes things can go wrong and request can come out longer than I thought it might be...

☞ Typ fic & Genre:

➵ Angst (ger. meaning ‘dread’ or ‘anxiety’) - The story features prevalent physical or emotional torment of characters. There is also usually a feeling of helplessness.

➵ Case fic - A fanfic, typically based on a mystery or procedural franchise, which focuses on the solving of a case.

➵ Crossovers (X-over) - A story featuring elements from several different fandoms.

➵ Death fic - A story in which one of the characters dies; often focused on its consequences.

➵ Dark fic - A type of fan fiction characterized by a heavy, depressive atmosphere and the presence of dramatic themes (angst, violence, torture), almost always with an unhappy ending.

➵ Fluff (Cuteness, Warm, Fuzzy Feeling) - Fanfic designed to evoke feelings of happiness in the reader and makes you feel warm inside when you read it. The story is soft/gentle, lighthearted, comfort, happy, etc (the opposite of angst).

➵ Horror Story - is a genre of fiction that is intended to disturb, frighten or scare. Often divided into the sub-genres of psychological horror and supernatural horror, which are in the realm of speculative fiction. The main themes of horror are usually vampires, demons, ghosts, werewolves, haunted buildings, cannibals or zombies. The storyline can be based on real threat and fear, with the main motives usually being psychopathic killers, rapists, virus outbreak, dangerous animal, beatings or nightmarish memories/visions of the protagonist. The element that distinguishes this type of horror from thriller is the level of violence it contains and the numerous presence of gore scenes.

➵ Hurt/Comfort (H/C) - Type of fanfic in witch one character receives comfort from another after (or while) suffering injury, illness, or a traumatic experience. It has various types, like: 

➥ Hurt/No comfort, also called sometimes Whumpage/Whump (slang: thumping, beating) - where no one comes to take care of character, excessive whump may also be considered as darkfic.

➵ Romance -

➵ Smut (Porn) - Erotic story/Contains scenes typically not allowed for under 18, depends on the marking:

➥ Suggestive (Safe For Work) - Mild provocative references or materials, the content does not contain anything of explicit nature.

➥ Lime 🍋‍🟩 (SFW) - Contains sexual situations, but lacks the graphic nature of a lemon.

➥ Vanilla - Used in reference to sexual situations. Indicates a story does not contain any unusual sexual practices.

➥ Lemon 🍋 (Not Safe For Work) - Contains graphic sexual situations, Minors Do Not Interact!

☞ Ships ♡ Relationship:

➵ Character x Character:

➥ Canon

➥ No canon

➵ Original Character (OC) x Character

➵ Reader x Character

␥ Polyamorous π

ⓘ ┆ Is the practice of, or desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved.

␥ Male/Female ⚥

ⓘ ┆

␥ Yaoi ⚣ (Boys’ Love/BL) (M/M)

ⓘ ┆ The work featuring a relationship between two (or more) men. It can be romance or sexual, but yaoi also includes of works depicting emotional and spiritual relationships.

␥ Yuri ⚢ (Girls’ Love/GL) (F/F)

ⓘ ┆ The work featuring a relationship between two (or more) women. It can be romance or sexual, but yuri also includes of works depicting emotional and spiritual relationships.

␥ Platonic (relationship/love)

ⓘ ┆ Is a type of love in which sexual desire or romantic features are nonexistent or has been suppressed or sublimated, but it means more than simple friendship.

␥ Forbidden Love, Mutual Pining & Unrequited love (one-sided love)

ⓘ ┆ Forbidden love may refer to a romantic relationship between two individuals which is highly discouraged or strongly opposed by a third party, such as the public; either due to cultural, societal, political, or religious reasons.

ⓘ ┆ Mutual Pining is when two people who like or love each other, but think the other one isn't interested, making this trope also a sort of unrequited love.

ⓘ ┆ Unrequited/One-sided love that is not openly reciprocated or understood as such by the beloved. The beloved may not be aware of the admirer's deep and pure affection, or may consciously reject it.

␥ Friends with benefits (FWB / FWBR)

ⓘ ┆ Is a term commonly used to reference a relationship that is sexual without being romantic. Typically, these relationships can be between people that consider themselves non-platonic and friends. These non-committal relationships can be short term, or evolve into serious romantic relationships - most often, however, it ends when the other person confesses their feelings.

⚠ Stockholm syndrome

ⓘ ┆ Is a coping mechanism (that victim use to survive the days, weeks or even years) to a captive or abusive situation. People develop positive feelings toward their captors or abusers over time. This condition applies to situations including child abuse, coach-athlete abuse, relationship abuse and sex trafficking. Treatment includes psychotherapy (“talk therapy”) and medications, if needed.

☞ What else can you add to your request?

➵ Reguest with only one character

➵ More than 1 character (I have no limit)

➵ Type of reader

➵ Modifications of characters

➵ AU's

➵ Things from another fandom/crossover (like mixing characters, worlds, etc.)

➵ Everything you will see on the blog (prompt, etc),

➵ Mix 2 types (or more) of prompts (but write me what is of what),

➵ Links - if you think I can't handle something, I don't know something or you just want to be more sure that your request will be accepted give me a link with additional information.

⚠ Various kinks/parafilia (Minors Do Not Interact!)

Note: if you send me a request from your profile (not as anon) it may happen that I will write to you if I need help with the request (or to let you know how my work on it is going).

☞ Dark (triggers&warnings) and controversial themes, which you can choose/use in request(s):

➼ Abortion

➼ Abuse

➼ Arranged & Forced Marriage

➼ Blackmails & threats

➼ Blood&Gore

➼ Cannibalism

➼ Death (execution, murder, suicide, etc)

➼ Degradation/Humiliation

➼ Drugging

➼ Incest/Stepcest (+ pseudo)

➼ Infertility

➼ Kidnapping

➼ Manipulation

➼ Phobia/Anxiety

➼ Prostitution

➼ Rape/Sexual assault (SA, Non-con/Dub-con),

➼ Risk Aware Consensual Kink (short RACK)

➼ Stalking

➼ Starving

➼ Stockholm Syndrome

➼ Torture (emotionally, mentally and physically)

➼ Any violence

➼ Unplanned Pregnancy

➼ Yandere (obsessive/possessive behaviour)

⚠ What I do not write?

➼ Most illnesses

➼ Scat

➼ Things that I don't know

➼ Phedophilia/Grooming

➼ Real person/people fiction (RPF is a fan fiction works, that tell stories about real people, usually celebrities, instead of fictional characters) - I can only write to a fictional character played by an actor (like: Buggy, Draco Malfoy, Connor RK800, Steve Harrington, Eliza Esposito, Harley Quinn, Daenerys Targaryen), but to the actor/actress (Jeff Ward, Thomas Felton, Bryan Dechart, Joe Keery, Sally Hawkins, Margot Robbie, Emilia Clarke), model or singer, to a real person - no.

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If you're not sure about something check here for the answer already [Ask] →

That’s all for now, but the tags/things may change or add as needed in future. If you are unsure, you can always shoot me an ask for clarification.

I don't bite ♡

~ Your Lovely Rose

[s1i9d]

Amphibia Season 2B: Episode Loglines

Okay, I’ve been thinking about whether I should be doing this post or not for the past couple of days, but I’m finally doing it! Amphibia returns with new episodes of Season 2 on 6th March! 

I previously did a speculation post of Season 2B based off just the episode titles, but now that the loglines are out, we can dive a little deeper until the episodes return in a month! I will be mentioning my speculation post and the theories I had at the time, so if you want context, click the link above.

This is a theory corner for the episode loglines in the show for 211, and 213 to 215 of Amphibia, (212 was “The Shut In!”) so if you don’t want to be spoiled, slide away! The original episode titles and loglines can be found at this link on the Disney TVA twitter!

With that being said, let’s get started!

211 - Night Drivers/Return to Wartwood

211A - Night Drivers: “Sprig and Polly stay up all night to drive the family home.” I thought this episode would be a kind of nightmare or nightmare creature attacking the Plantars when on their way to Wartwood. It is interesting that Polly and Sprig are driving the F-wagon when Hop Pop and Anne are the ones who canonically know how to drive Bessie. If HP and Anne are out (maybe either sleeping or just injured for some reason, I think they might be the B plot with their nightmare/injury.

211B - Return to Wartwood: “The Plantars make it to Wartwood, and they realise they forgot something important.” When I read this, I had a serious moment of anxiety. What could the Plantars have forgotten about in between 201A and 210B? There are several plausible things, but to name a few: MicroAngelo and Polly’s new bucket, forgetting to pick Wally from his hometown, the Skipman, a bunch of Anne’s stuff since he ran empty handed to the Fwagon in the mid-season finale, the King’s gold card, the butterfly for Anne’s mom, Hop Pop’s friend’s Sal’s Sauce, and Sprig’s gift for Ivy. But hype, they return to Wartwood.

213 - Ivy on the Run/After the Rain

213A - Ivy on the Run: “Fed up of her mom’s strict rules, Ivy concocts a plan to run away.” This was not all that surprising since we know Ivy’s mom tried to pair up Sprig and Ivy in Season 1. I think this will mostly be Ivy shenanigans with her crashing over at the Plantars, or making her way independently in the world and struggling to do so. She won’t understand her mother’s strict rules, but she goes through a change that makes her realise her mom only worries for her, and her mother realises that she needs to let Ivy breathe and not hold her with an Iron fist.

213B - After the Rain: “??????? ?????????” What the heck is this? Why would the episode logline be just a bunch of question marks? What could possibly happen in this episode that just the logline alone spoils it? If my previous speculation post is correct, this is the episode where Hop Pop reveals the mystery and horrors of the music box, and perhaps simultaneously King Andrias reveals new truths and information to Marcy and the proposition she had for him in “A Day at the Aquarium”.

Even though a two-parter special is after this episode, this is the one I’m most excited for personally! I don’t think I’ve been really right about Amphibia theories, but if this is really a Calamity Box reveal episode with Hop Pop and Andrias, I will personally lose my mind!

214 - The First Temple

214 - The First Temple: “Marcy, Anne and the Plantars travel to an ancient temple that could hold the key to getting Anne and Marcy home, but only if they can survive the temple’s deadly challenges!” 

This is extremely exciting! The first temple! From what the book showed us, the first temple is going to be Anne’s, recharging the blue gem on the Music Box. According to Matt’s Amphibia Direct last Christmas, this is the last two parter before the Season finale. I don’t have any understanding of what this could contain other than traps, character drama based off of “After the Rain” and more Calamity Box plot shenanigans.

215 - New Wartwood/Friend or Frobo?

215A - New Wartwood: “Intent on winning over Wartwood, Marcy makes a plan to improve the town.” I see this as similar to “Cracking Mrs. Croaker” in Season 1, where Marcy tries to befriend everyone in Wartwood through the ways she knows how. This is a callback to “Scavenger Hunt” where Marcy openly admits to Anne that she’s jealous of her ability to connect to other people easily. I think she will create such elaborate and highly impactful changes to the town’s plan that the town will no longer be Wartwood, and as necessary as change is, there’s something about Wartwood in the way it is that makes it feel like home.

I suspect the main reason why Wartwood doesn’t trust Marcy is Sasha. The last human that the people of Wartwood met other than Anne was Sasha, a girl who was the criminal mastermind of the Battle of Toad Tower, trying to imprison them and almost cause their death. Similar to Sprig’s reaction to Marcy in her debut episode, “Marcy at the Gates”. The trauma of Sasha follows them everywhere like the fresh smell of Hop Pop’s terribly scented family recipes.

215B - Friend or Frobo?: “Desperate for fun, Polly breaks out on her own and finds an unlikely friend in the process.” How jaw dropping that Polly (the most sidelined main character out of the four) is the one who meets the robot first, and interacts with them. To clarify, Polly is great, but she is obviously given much less attention than Anne and Sprig (the main characters) and Hop Pop, the most comedic character to exist in this show.

Frobo (the Robot) is the greatest mystery of all plotlines introduced this season, since we know nothing about them after “Fort in the Road” where we are introduced at the end. The fact that Polly meets Frobo after they arrive in Wartwood, and Frobo is clearly seen at the Newtopian border at the first few seconds of “Lost in Newtopia” indicated they followed them back to Wartwood. I have no idea what this means, but the excitement levels are INTENSE!

I feel a lot better now that I’ve explored the possible ideas for this season. But I’m still really hyped! I’ll reblog this post with my updated thoughts on the last batch of episode loglines when they come out.

Also lemme know your thought and speculation for Season 2B! Who’s ready to cry and laugh with me?!

[terramythos]

TerraMythos 2021 Reading Challenge - Book 12 of 26

Title: A Wizard of Earthsea (Earthsea Cycle #1) (1968)

Author: Ursula K. Le Guin

Genre/Tags: Fantasy, Young Adult, Third-Person

Rating: 8/10

Date Began: 5/6/2021

Date Finished: 5/12/2021

Ged is a talented young magician with incredible potential-- possibly greater than any before him. He sets off to join the wizarding School of Roke, and quickly surpasses all of his peers. But in an act of arrogance, Ged tries to bring back the dead to impress a rival student. He unleashes a malevolent shadow upon the world, leaving him traumatized and permanently scarred. 

Soon Ged finds himself hunted by the shadow wherever he goes. None of his magic seems to work on it. Worse, he lives in fear that if the dark creature overtakes him, it will use his body as a weapon to harm others. Ged journeys from island to island in an attempt to find the solution and banish the shadow once and for all. 

Only in silence the word, only in dark the light,  only in dying life:  bright the hawk’s flight  on the empty sky. 

Content warnings and some spoilers below the cut. 

Content warnings for the book: Violence and death, including child death and animal death. Traumatic injury. 

As a fiction writer, Ursula K. Le Guin is best known for her Earthsea series, but I haven’t read them until now. She had a big impact on my childhood via a series of picture books called Catwings (they're... about a family of cats who can fly). As an adult, I’ve grown more intrigued as I've learned about Le Guin’s philosophies, especially anticapitalism. I read her famous horror story The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas last year and found it unsettling and thought-provoking. So I decided to read some of her longer works! And, of course, speculative fiction is always the way to my heart. My wonderful sister gave me the first four books of Earthsea for the holidays last year, and I’m finally getting the chance to read them. 

Overall I had a good time with A Wizard of Earthsea. It’s structured differently than a lot of fantasy novels I’ve read. While there is a big overarching plot, the individual chapters usually have their own complete story arc. It’s the type of book where you can read one chapter before bed and feel like you got a whole story; each part advances the main narrative while also providing a complete side adventure. 

There’s a lot of travel in A Wizard of Earthsea due to the setting. Earthsea is a giant, possibly world-spanning archipelago, meaning there’s a ton of islands, each of which has its own way of life. The conflict naturally has Ged travel from island to island and interact with various peoples and creatures. The closest comparison I can think of is The Odyssey, and I’d be shocked if Le Guin didn’t draw inspiration from that. Both stories involve the protagonist traveling by sea and meeting a variety of characters and mythological creatures through smaller, discrete conflicts and interactions. Usually I find long travel sequences boring, but in this case they were one of my favorite parts of the book. There’s always a sense of anticipation on where Ged’s journey will take him next. 

The magic system is also is pretty cool. The idea is that all parts of nature, from humans to goats to oceans, have hidden “true” names. Knowing something (or someone’s) true name gives one power over it (or them). Thus wizards use true names to manipulate nature; giving another person your true name is an act of absolute trust and devotion. However, a big theme of the book is equilibrium. One must always be aware of potential consequences when using magic. Changing the wind in one part of the world could cause a devastating storm one island over. Sort of a butterfly effect type thing. 

Even though violence is one of my content warnings, I’m impressed that Le Guin largely circumvents it in the story. In many fantasy stories, a wizard/mage character uses their magic to fight and crush their foes. Not so much in this novel. While Ged clashes with various entities through the story, he usually just outsmarts them. Thus his showdown with a big, fuck-off dragon boils down to Ged guessing its true name and telling it to leave. Antagonists are usually the ones instigating violence. 

One thing I found odd about the pacing of the book is it slowed down a lot in the last few chapters. There’s a big action sequence with serious consequences around the novel’s midpoint, but everything after that is slower and more reflective. On a surface reading level, I’m not sure I liked this. I’m used to stories ramping up the tension more and more until the end. However, I did like the climax itself, when Ged reveals the shadow’s true name. The central moral of the novel is that one needs to accept everything about themselves, including their past mistakes. Everyone has a dark side, which ties into the central theme of balance, and even the opening poem of the novel (which I used as the excerpt for this review). It’s a pretty universal idea, but Le Guin presents it in a thematically satisfying way. 

I tagged this as a Young Adult novel because Le Guin wrote it for a teenage audience. YA didn’t exist as its own genre at the time, but A Wizard of Earthsea is a coming of age story (a staple of YA), and even has a moral message of sorts at the end. However, sometimes it’s really obvious that it’s intended for a younger audience. As I get older, I’ve noticed that YA tends to be pretty blunt about its meaning and symbolism in a way adult novels aren’t. For example, while pursuing the shadow, Ged gets lost in a mysterious fogbank. To me this was a clear callback to the first chapter, where Ged outsmarts a band of barbarians by trapping them in a fog. But Le Guin also made sure to tell me several pages later, in case I missed the parallel. I’m torn on this when reading YA. While I’m not the intended audience, I feel this approach underestimates teenagers’ ability to critically examine a text. But YA teaches many how to view things that way, so I see why authors do it. Teens aren’t a monolith, but it is interesting to see this tendency to over-explain in a novel from 50+ years ago. 

A Wizard of Earthsea is surprisingly progressive in many respects. Perhaps the most obvious is race. Ged and most of the main cast are explicitly nonwhite and described as such in the text. This isn’t a huge revelation in 2021, but it’s amazing to see something like that in a mainstream fantasy novel from 1968. Apparently Le Guin struggled with publishers for a long time, as many early covers whitewashed Ged for the sake of “sales” until she gained more creative control. And the (shitty) film/TV adaptations of Earthsea are just as guilty. I went through a LOT of covers while researching this book, and even newer editions often opt for heavily stylized art, nonhuman subjects, etc. The cover I chose is from 1984, when Le Guin presumably had more influence on Ged’s portrayal. I’m interested to see how past book covers stack up when I deep dive on the other books. 

However, I found the book to be not so progressive when it came to gender roles (I know, I wasn’t expecting that either). Le Guin makes it very clear that all the famous and powerful wizards/mages in Earthsea are dudes. The wizard school toward the beginning is all dudes. All the adventurers and sailors in the story are dudes. Ged himself makes some pretty sexist comments (though to be fair, that was pre-character development). There are relatively few female characters in the story, and many are either bit parts or (in one case) a seductive, power-hungry villain. Portraying sexism in a fantasy setting isn’t an inherently bad thing. Jemisin’s Dreamblood duology, which I read earlier this year, introduced stringent gender roles in order to explore the insidious nature of misogyny. But A Wizard of Earthsea doesn’t really go beneath the surface level. Yarrow is probably the most well-written female character in the story, and she only shows up in the last few chapters. Again, I’m interested to see how Le Guin handles this in later entries; the next book stars a female protagonist and Ged’s the deuteragonist. 

I liked A Wizard of Earthsea overall, and I think it serves as a good introduction to both the series and a central recurring character. While I have some criticisms of the first book, I do realize it’s a relatively early work of Le Guin’s. The last novel in this series was published in 2001, so I’m interested to see how the characters and writing changed over 30+ years. 

[brightbeautifulthings]

Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace

"'What if sometimes there is no choice about what to love? What if the temple comes to Mohammed? What if you just love? without deciding? You just do: you see her and in that instant are lost to sober account-keeping and cannot choose but to love?'"

Year Read: 2014, 2020

Rating: 5/5

Context: It's hard to know where to begin writing a review for this book. I read it for the first time in graduate school in about five weeks (alongside everything else I had to do in grad school, so I don't recommend that), and it basically blew my mind. At the same time, it's hard to imagine tackling it any other way for the first time. Despite its difficulty, there are things obsessive and immersive and, appropriately, even addictive about it. Full immersion might be the only way to read it for the first time, and I obsessed about it for months afterward. Since I'm not on any deadlines, I took it more slowly this time (21 weeks) so I could enjoy the writing and the nuances without the pressure to finish. For my less coherent weekly updates in real time, see my blog posts. Trigger warnings: Everything, everything. Death (on-page), child death, animal death, suicide, suicidal ideation, rape, pedophilia, possible incest, child abuse/abusive households, graphic violence/gore, eye horror, severe injury, drug use, addiction, alcoholism, mental illness, depression, OCD, grief, racism, ableism, transphobia, sexism, inexplicable hostility toward Canadians.

About: If it's difficult to know how to write a review, it's equally hard to describe what Infinite Jest is about. It's about so many things, tennis, addiction, communication (failures), and entertainment among them, but I'll do my best. Beneath all the numerous characters, timelines, and subplots, the main plot is about a film so entertaining that it kills anyone who watches it, robs them of all desire to do anything but watch it until they die, and what a faction of Canadian assassins will do to possess it. The auteur is James Incandenza, a suicide whose son, Hal, is a prodigy at Enfield Tennis Academy. Next door to E.T.A. is Ennet House, a drug rehabilitation center where Don Gately, former thief and Demerol addict, is taking it day by day to stay sober. Though they don't know it, Hal and Gately are connected, and the deadly Entertainment and those who seek it draw their paths closer and closer together.

Thoughts: It's rare to find a book that is actually as smart as it claims to be, but IJ is--certainly much smarter than I am, despite all my attempts to make sense of it. It starts off strong and doesn't let up for several hundred pages, which is a huge achievement all by itself. Wallace excels at writing extremely polished sections that could almost function alone as short stories, and the first chapter is one of my favorites in all fiction. It's reassuring, I think, to start the book off on a strong note, in case we worried we were in for a thousand pages of tedious slog. It can be both, but it's often heartfelt, insightful, and funny as well, and the payoff is well worth the effort. I don’t know how Wallace manages to pack every page with so much meaning. Anybody can put tedious lists in their books or make reading purposely difficult (and I have attitude about writers who do this for no reason), but there’s nothing haphazard about this book, despite its size and varied focus. Everything seems utterly intentional. The conversations are really top-tier; Wallace has a great ear for how people talk, and it's a fascinating look at how communication works and doesn't work.

Thematically, I think the book succeeds on more than any other level, including plot or structure. If we could say this book is "about" anything, we would almost certainly start with the themes and not the plot, which is often secondary to whatever point Wallace is trying to make at the moment. It takes an in-depth looks at things like addiction, depression, loneliness, failed communication, sincerity v. irony, critiques of postmodernism and metafiction (while being very meta itself, at times), and the very specific selfishness of an American culture that insists on freedom even to the point of self-destruction. At times, it feels a little heavy-handed or like it was yanked right out of an intro to philosophy course, but I suppose something in a thousand pages has to be obvious if we're ever going to pick up on it. A lot of these themes resurface in his other work, from "This is Water" and "E Unibus Pluram" to Orin Incandenza's Brief Interview style Q and A (and he would be a perfectly fitting character in that book).

The characters are some of my favorites in literary fiction as well, particularly the Incandenza family and Don Gately, and to a lesser extent Joelle Van Dyne (although Wallace typically doesn’t write female characters very well, and she comes with some issues). Hal and Gately couldn't be more different; Hal excels at everything he's ever done, and Gately has a record that includes accidental homicide on it. Hal is the hero of non-action, since little that happens in the book is engineered by him, while Gately is closer to the more typical hero of action, who defends the undeserving at great cost to himself. Yet their struggles with addiction are similar, and they both manage to be incredibly sympathetic characters. In my opinion, the book is always at its best when we’re with Hal or Gately, but I’m strongly driven by good characters. Despite being dead, James Incandenza's presence is also felt all over the book, from the Entertainment he created to his haunting ETA and sticking beds to the ceiling (probably the weirdest ghost I've ever seen in fiction). He's a tragic character in a book full of tragic characters. The others are too numerous to name, from the other tennis players at ETA and recovering addicts at Enfield, to the various bystanders populating Boston. We get brief glimpses into almost all of them, and while they may not all feel relevant at the time, most are memorable or heart-wrenching or slapstick funny, or all three. It's a book that contains multitudes.

That's not to say it's always on point though, and it isn't. There are a number of very serious problems with representation in this novel, and they're as bad as its detractors claim. A lot of the 90s humor aged very poorly, but that's not an excuse for some of the unabashedly racist depictions of African Americans, the uncharitable descriptions of Steeply's and Poor Tony's cross-dressing, or--however much I love him as a character--the fact that Mario Incandenza’s descriptions are ableist in just about every possible way. Wallace thinks he's capturing "voice" when he's really encouraging harmful stereotypes. The humor of the novel often doesn’t depend at all on these stereotypes and would in fact, be a lot more funny if I wasn’t spending so much energy cringing at it. So many of the little racist and ableist asides could have easily been edited out of the entire novel to make it less offensive. There are also sections where he seems at pains to be as gross as possible for its own sake. There are plenty of things grim or uncomfortable or flat out distasteful about this book, but sometimes the graphic violence kind of jumps out and stabs you in the eye, say, with a railroad spike.

If there are times when I was totally absorbed in the little tragedies of the Incandenza family or Gately's struggles, there are plenty more where it's like pushing something heavy up a hill. No lie, some of it is slogging through tedious minutiae and various experimental writing styles (some more successful and less offensive than others). Wallace has a gift for purposeful tedium; it’s at its peak in The Pale King, but he gives it a nice warm-up round here. The novel is difficult and meant to be, since Wallace maintained that some of the best pleasures are the ones we have to work for, and he's not totally off base. There's something very satisfying about living, for a time, in a book that spans a thousand pages, that demands focus and perseverance, and manages to give back (almost) as much as it takes. The book is always structurally interesting, but it starts to get more complicated toward the end as various characters and plots begin to almost slide into one another. I forgot how frustrating it was to near the end and realize--again--that it wasn't going to wrap up with any kind of satisfaction; the various plots slide, but they don’t meet. I thought if I paid closer attention on a second read that I would pick up more of the plot things I’d missed on my first, but I think the problem is that those answers simply aren’t to be found in the actual text. Of course, they can point us toward various conclusions, and the novel certainly encourages us to speculate and make connections, but I don’t think the actual answers are there.

That brings me to some of my final thoughts, for now. There's no doubt that this is a hugely successful book, and I believe it accomplished exactly what Wallace meant it to do. He jokingly referred to it as a failed entertainment, much the way Jim considered his lethal Entertainment a failure, but I have the sense that Wallace, unlike Jim, failed on purpose. The book purposely pays more attention to structure and theme than it does to plot or character, yet the plot and characters are hugely compelling for what we see of them. Imagine the book it could have been if he had paid equal attention to all of them. Wallace attempted to create a book that people wouldn't want to stop reading. Reaching the end certainly encourages us to begin again, as the first chapter is actually the last in chronology, but that trick only works the first time. By my second read, I realized that starting over wouldn't help me fill in any of those blanks or answer any of my questions, and I was content to let it go. On the one hand, IJ depends upon its structure to tell the story it's telling. On the other, think of the book it could have been if it spent more time telling a story and developing its characters and less time belaboring a point. It's one of the best books I've ever read, and the tragedy is that I think it could have been even better.

[electric-sympathy]

OK, it’s Dean in Hell speculation time, is anyone ready??

I’ve been going through my notes for a fic that’s like, half vampirism half post-Hell issues, and a lot of the time I write down my general thoughts as if I’m making a post to organize it all and maintain clarity. 

It’s a little hairy though so it’s going under the cut lol. Probably not something you should read if you don’t like dark!Dean material or horror in general. The process of being someone that writes horror means you have to go down dark trains of thought sometimes.

So, in this fic I needed to have flashbacks to that 10 years for a rather specific purpose. In order to do that, I needed to think about what Dean’s experience learning to torture would be like at an intimate level...

I don’t think a Dean drunk on the beginnings of demonhood’s first impulse would be torture itself. 

I would think that Dean's early journey through torture and the process of becoming a demon-- which I DO believe starts the moment you step off the rack, with some preparatory mental/spiritual tenderizing leading up to it that warps one’s mental state-- would be a tactile experience. Dean is a tactile, intimate person, as well as someone that deals with autopsies for work, and I think twisting that around would be fitting. Anatomically speaking, I think he would spend lots of time learning the ins and outs of the human body. 

I think the scariest thing about monsters like Alastair is the fact that they could run a hand down your side and it wouldn't be sexual. You don't have anything in your human experience to deal with violation that doesn’t fit into that box. There's no compartment in your head for it. That's the terrible unknown. 

Human beings are very picky about who can touch them, how they can touch them, and when. I don't think people are always perturbed by touchy-feelies (i.e., a lot of people seem really uncomfortable with the excess of hugging and kissing my loud Italian family is in the habit of doing) because it reminds them of sex. It's just too close. Physical intimacy is an expression of trust. Being particularly comfortable with contact with your mother, for example, isn't just because she's taken care of you since you were a baby. It's because you love her. Contact can be uncomfortable because, emotionally, it can be like touching a raw wound. Too intense.

Being allowed to touch someone with no strings attached whatsoever would be utterly alien. Breaking these barriers down seems like an important step in becoming a demon and in torture in general. You put enough pressure on that human bubble around your soul, and eventually...

So, yes. I see the first few years of Dean's apprenticeship involving a whole lot of just touching. Slotting his fingers between muscle and bone, running tendons through his thumb and index fingers, sliding a hand down into the innards to feel the weight of a stomach in his palm. He knows precisely what an eyeball feels like, a brain, the clearance between your lungs and chest wall. And probably a lot of being able to answer those questions of "What does touching an eyeball feel like? A brain?" 

Fuck, he could probably explain in detail why air comes out of your ears when you sneeze sometimes.

The experience of using someone, exploring their body in the most hostile way possible, would be an awful, twisted kind of freedom. We know from real life criminals that perverting and destroying such a fundamental social structure can be addicting. It's an intensity of control, rather than emotional attachment. Someone touching your lungs, cupping your stomach, poking through your intestines-- I think we don't always think of gory things like this as such a severe violation because our attention is diverted to the idea of violence and injury... But in Hell? Where there is nothing but time, no real bodies and no permanent harm?

I think even aside from the pain, just being the soul-of-the-day made the subject of that investigation of fucked up curiosity would be enough to terrorize people. I’m sure Alastair would let it go. And aside from the demonic interest in the violation of personal space (leading up to the ability of demonic possession), I do think a thinker like Dean would take it as an academic interest as well when stripped of the human trait of squeamishness/seeing damage to another as damage to oneself.

I think that Demon Dean would be sharp and insidious. I don’t think all those fics that see him (it?) as just like some kind of axe murderer are accurate (I’m talking about contemporary stuff written about S4 type Demon Dean, not juiced-up-specifically-on-murder Knight Dean who is a whole other deal)-- it’s Sam, the boring unempathetic one, that uses brute force when evil. I think Dean’s history of trauma, empathy, and academics could be used to form a demon that could destroy a man with just a few slices and cutting words in just the right place. S4 Demon Dean beating someone to death with the butt of an axe like any baby demon could do? Please!!!

~🖕 this blog is anti d*stiel and anti w*ncest, don’t use my meta for nasty shit 🖕~

[dangerdaysdiary]

From Cassie the Venomous... A Danger Days FAQ

You can find the original post on Cassie’s website here.

Frequently asked 'Danger Days...' Questions Answered!March 18, 2011Now that My Chemical Romance's Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys is out, I'm finding more and more questions about it leading people to this site. I figured it would be beneficial to address some of the ones that are asked most frequently in one place for the benefit of all! I hope this helps! ORIGINAL POST:  November 24, 2010 @ 11:57 P.M. UPDATED: March 18, 2011 @ 9:47 P.M. ____ The Killjoys Fun Ghoul -Corresponding MCR member: Guitarist, Frank Iero -Raygun: Green with horror-style stickers attached to it -Symbol: A smiling face with one eye crossed out and a jagged mouth -Physical Description: Wears a yellow shirt with black-striped accents over which he wears a military vest. In the video for "SING," Fun Ghoul bears a scar on the right side of his face at his mouth. -Mask: Purple and green Frankenstein mask -Additional Information: ... Jet Star -Corresponding MCR member: Guitarist, Ray Toro -Raygun: Blue with red and white details and the text "BECAUSE I SAID SO" -Symbol: Star with a face and a lightening bolt rising from its left side -Physical Description: Wears an eyepatch on his right side. His jacket displays an American flag on its back. -Mask: Black astronaut-style helmet -Additional Information: The original name for Jet Star was "Raygun Jones." Kobra Kid -Corresponding MCR member: Bassist, Mikey Way -Raygun: Red with white details and a decal that says "deluxe" (his raygun was originally named "Demon-shark Deluxe"). -Symbol: the face of a hissing cobra -Physical Description: Wears a red jacket over a yellow-and-black zebra-print shirt -Mask: Yellow helmet with blue and red eye-like details that displays the message “GOOD LUCK” on its visor -Additional Information: In addition to his raygun, Kobra Kid can also be seen using a power glove in the video for “Na Na Na…." Mikey describes Kobra Kid as a "misunderstood" character with a "short temper" who "knows Kung-Fu." Party Poison -Corresponding MCR member: Vocalist, Gerard Way -Raygun: yellow with pink details and "Give Me Money" written in Japanese on its side. -Symbol: pill with an "X" beneath it -Physical Description: Wears a blue jacket with red details, a "dead pegasus" logo on the front and his Killjoy symbol on the back -Mask: yellow domino mask with blue circular details and clown-style eyes or a decorated "mousekat" helmet. -Additional Information: Party Poison was among the Danger Days... characters active on Twitter preceding the album's release. The Killjoys' names, which Mikey Way told NME are "themed after designer drugs," started as the names of their rayguns, but later turned into character names. The band has said that their Killjoy personas are not characters they are playing, but how they picture themselves in the future. Are the Killjoys Dead? Currently, as a result of the “SING” video, the Killjoys are presumed dead. However, a picture from Gerard Way of “Party Poison” in what appears to be an unzipped body bag (left) captioned “Killjoys never die” has many fans questioning how dead they truly are. UPDATE: April 10, 2011 Dr. Death Defying tweeted: that "there are four acceptable levels of dead after posting an ode to Party Poison, whom he called "dearly departed." More information will follow if the four levels of dead are explained further. Dr. Death Defying Played by Steve Righ? of Mindless Self Indulgence, Dr. Death Defying is the smooth-talking narrator who filters in-and-out of Danger Days…. He is a D.J. for 109 F.M., WKIL, a pirate radio station that operates in the Zones. He is recognized by his “Slaughtermatic Sounds” jacket, which also says “Jackals” and “Philly,” his aviator sunglasses and the bandanna he wears tied around his head. Dr. Death Defying uses an electric wheelchair because of an apparent injury to his left leg, to which an electric brace is strapped. In an hour-long video “listening party” hosted by the D.J., the character implied that he is a veteran, possibly of the Helium Wars, which have been alluded to vaguely. Show Pony and the Girl Show Pony, the character who can be recognized by his "NOISE" half-shirt, blue-and-white polka-dot tights & helmet and rollerskates is the companion of Dr. Death Defying, the narrator of Danger Days... (played by Steve from Mindless Self Indulgence). Show Pony is played by performer Ricky "Rebel" (Twitter | Reverbnation). Rebel opened for My Chemical Romance as Show Pony at the band's Hollywood album release show. The actress who plays the Killjoy girl in the videos, whose character name has thus far only been "the Girl," goes by Grace Jeanette. She, too, is an actress and a musical performer. The Girl's role in the Danger Days world appears to be a significant one; as, she was kidnapped by Better Living Industries for a stull-unknown reason. The Zones and Battery City

The Killjoys world centers around Battery City and its surrounding concentric Zones. The map to the left shows how the Zones are laid out in relation to the city. Utopian Battery City is central, corporate, clean and the center of manufacturing. It is where Battery Towers is located. Battery City, California is the setting for My Chemical Romance's "SING" video, to give you a better perception of what it looks like. The setting for the "Na Na Na..." video is in the Zones, which are a more lawless, desert terrain in which the Killjoys live, run and fully embrace their freedom. The Zones are dirty, wild and dangerous-- the opposite of Battery City. Geographic landmarks include: Route Guano, which is the road on which Gerard has said, "the shit happens." It is where Jet Star and Kobra Kid are "ghosted" by an exterminator in the Danger Days... track "Jet-Star and The Kobra Kid/Traffic Report." "The Getaway Mile," which may be a specific location, is mentioned in the song "Bulletproof Heart." There is also a place which Dr. Death Defying on Twitter called "Wolfblood Beach." Better Living Industries Better Living Industries (Also known as BLI, BL/ind, or BL industries) is the corporation that controls Battery City. The corporation strives to bring about structure in a post-apocalyptic world. It is known for producing emotion-eliminating medications as well as every other manufactured product one can acquire in 2019. BLI crosses over from the Killjoys world and into real life. The made-up corporation has its own  web site with products that you can actually purchase, a mission statement and a "Zone Report" in both Japanese and English.  Also, MCR takes it a step further by having changed the name under which their music is published to "Better Living Industries Music," which you can see in the liner notes of Danger Days.... BLI also overtakes the edited version of Danger Days..., whiting out the internal album art, taking away the lyrics and putting its smiling face logo (above right) all over it. The Danger Days: California 2019 Edition box set is packaged in a BLI box and the 3-song The Mad Gear & Missile Kid E.P. that comes with it is printed on a disc made to look like a BLI brand CD-R. Check out some BL/ind commercials and "Fact News" reports. Dead Pegasus Dead Pegasus is a 2019 oil company. Korse, Draculoids and S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W

Korse is an exterminator for BL/ind's SCARECROW Unit. In the videos, he is played by comic writer Grant Morrison. The "SING" video has raised speculation among fans that Korse could possibly a robot of some sort; as, he is seemingly "activated" in his chamber by the push of a button. Some also speculate, based on Gerard Way's character sketches and his indicating that Korse suffers from "Zone sickness," that he may stay in the  chamber shown in the "SING" video for medical reasons. Grant Morrison revealed to MTV that Korse is "intimately connected with the Killjoys and their secret history," which has yet to be revealed. The SCARECROW Unit of BL/ind is a sort of police force. Korse leads it, and The Draculoids are the other exterminators that appear to be of lower ranking than Korse. They're a "clean-up crew" for the Zones, getting rid of the things and people who do not comply with the monochromatic standards of Better Living Industries. The Mad Gear And Missile Kid

The Mad Gear and Missile Kid is My Chemical Romance's alter-ego band for Danger Days... Mad Gear is what MCR imagined the Killjoys would listen to in 2019. Fans who ordered the California 2019 Box Set received a bonus E.P. of the three tracks MCR recorded as The Mad Gear And Missile Kid: 1. F.T.W.W.W. (acronym for "fuck this whole wide world") 2. "Mastas Of Ravenkroft" 3. "Black Dragon Fighting Society" The genesis of TMG&MK came with the writing of "Black Dragon Fighting Society," which was originally recorded for the pre-Danger Days album the band "scrapped." "F.T.W.W.W." and "Mastas of Ravenkroft" followed as songs created specifically for TMG&MK. Gerard Way told Alternative Press that the MCR is interested in creating a full album as The Mad Gear and Missile Kid and that they would like to play shows as the alter-ego band on off-days of tours in the future. EVENTS in the Zones 2012: The Great Fires 2017: The Pig Bomb ?: Helium Wars

-- If there's something about which you are confused that you would like added to this post, let me know! Consider this a perpetual draft that will update as often as you, Reader, need it to. Also, please don't hesitate to submit corrections! I have compiled the information in this post using knowledge I've gained from interviews of the band by several sources. Suggested Reading to Expand your Killjoys Knowledge: The Twitter development of the Zones presented in a linear fashion. A full interview transcript series posted by Coup De Main Magazine. XoXo c.

[quakerjoe]

This is a long read, but it’s the best damned thing I’ve read in a long time... ~Joe

I stopped watching Chernobyl after the first episode because a lifetime ago, I was a serious physics nerd and everything they were saying was absurd about the levels of radiation. Last night we watched the other 4 episodes and I thought maybe I might try and push the rock up the hill again and maybe open some eyes about where we are right now in this truly dystopic Orwellian nightmare. J. Robert Oppenheimer was a particular hero to me as a teen because he was so brilliant and accomplished the impossible in just 18 months. If you have not read American Prometheus, I highly recommend it because it details a time when we had a government of imbeciles running around with their hair on fire about communists who threw people in jail who wouldn't admit to that old drunk McCarthy that they were communists. Like all demagogues, McCarthy thought he was the lone arbiter of who was and who wasn't a patriot and he rose to such prominence because he was willing to lie about anything to make his baseless allegations. But Joe McCarthy was no patriot nor was his principle henchman Roy Cohn. They used the collective paranoias of stupid people to manufacture a crisis that did not exist. They destroyed lives and relished doing it to what would be referred now as the 'elitist liberals' like Dalton Trumbo and Oppy. Oppy was an extremely educated liberal who spoke to other people like him. Some of whom were communists. This made him a threat in the minds of the men who put Julius and Ethel Rosenberg to death. Ethel was entirely innocent but that didn't matter to a public brought to full froth by the hysteria of the day. Those men beating the drums of patriotism could not conceive of a man like Oppy talking to a communist and not be a communist himself, the same was said of Trumbo. Guilt by association was just enough for the likes of Cohn and McCarthy. "For each lie, a debt to the truth is incurred." Chernobyl Historians have written heroic books about the great generals of WWII, MacArthur and Patton being the most famous and they do deserve their notoriety but they ignored to a large extent who actually won the war for the allies and that comes down to two men: Alan Turing and J. Robert Oppenheimer. By any measure, Alan was the greatest man of the 20th century. Oppy is a bit harder to fit into that calculus and he said so himself because he knew atomic weapons would change the world and not in a good way. It's true the Japanese were whipped and that Doolittle could have continued to firebomb Japanese cities until the Japanese came to heel but that is still speculation. After Nagasaki, the war was over right or wrong, Oppy did that and saved hundreds of thousands of American troops. After the war, McCarthy went after Oppy. He wasn't treated like the hero he was and didn't want to be. He was treated like a Soviet agent and stripped of all of his security clearances because he would not name names. He was threatened with prison, his jobs were taken from him and he was exiled from the community of scientists that *he* built because of the lies of scum like McCarthy and Cohn. Alan Turing didn't fair much better from his government either. The McCarthys of that time didn't really believe in America at all, he wasn't a patriot no matter how loudly his supporters screamed it. McCarthy didn't think the idea of America could survive 'communist infiltration'. He had no grasp of why communism spread in Russia like wildfire because to his primitive and ignorant mind, he didn't know what it was like to live under a Tsar. 'If it spread there then it can spread here' was the thinking because McCarthy didn't understand or believe in the ideals that founded America. To him, they were so weak and feeble that communism would be preferable than what we had in America. That lie destroyed lives, destroyed families and stands as a black stain on our nation's history. The thing about liars is that they have to tell bigger and bigger lies to cover for all the small ones and then that debt to the truth comes due. It came to McCarthy when Joseph Welch lanced the festering boil that was McCarthyism with the truth. Before Welch delivered his fatal blow, he reacted to McCarthy's slander with this: "And so, Senator, I asked him to go back to Boston. Little did I dream you could be so reckless and so cruel as to do an injury to that lad. It is true he is still with Hale & Dorr. It is true that he will continue to be with Hale & Dorr. It is, I regret to say, equally true that I fear he shall always bear a scar needlessly inflicted by you. If it were in my power to forgive you for your reckless cruelty, I would do so. I like to think I'm a gentle man, but your forgiveness will have to come from someone other than me." Then a moment later, he drew the blade that ended the national nightmare when he murdered McCarthy with the indelible truth: Mr. Welch: You've done enough. Have you no sense of decency, sir, at long last? Have you left no sense of decency? McCarthy and Cohn of course had no decency. Cohn delighted in going after homosexuals and destroying their lives while being a homosexual himself. They were the most vile hypocrites the world had ever known. McCarthy incapable of feeling shame, drank himself to death after he was humiliated as the coward he was. I sat there thinking about this as the full horror of what happened at Chernobyl unfolded. The entirety of the Russian government played out exactly like Trump having all of his cabinet praising his greatness, it was vulgar, it was disgusting. Then I remembered all the other dictators I've read about in history who surrounded themselves with sycophants. Martin Bormann being the reference example who served Hitler so faithfully. Bormann was a slack-jowled imbecile who was barely qualified to lick stamps but nobody in the Reich dare cross the thug because he was Hitler's favorite yes man. I remember that day Trump's cabinet took turns telling Trump how honored they were to serve under his super terrifically awesomeness and that they were but boot-licking sycophants. Pence really had to lather up Trump's ass before he could muster a vulgar enough kiss to satisfy that insidious git. I sat thinking that this was the lowest moment in the history of the Republic. What separated them from the Soviet Central Committee under Gorbechev? Not a damn thing. They *all* lie for a living and kiss the dear leader's ass. It was the most unAmerican thing ever done in the White House. It was sheer cowardice by each and every single one of them. Any man who had a lick of honor would have walked out in disgust to save what's left of their honor. The *only* one who got out of this administration with any was General Mattis. And you can see this cult in all of its terrible glory if you just glance at any of the stories coming in from visitors to the concentration camps now open on United States' soil. There are zero testimonials from any objective visitor who says conditions are fine. Last Thursday a government Lawyer argued to 3 appellate judges that giving toothbrushes and toothpaste were luxury items not to be afforded for the $700-$800 a day American tax payers are paying private prison companies to house these thousands of misdemeanor offenders. Republicans have strenuously objected to calling these 'detention centers' 'concentration camps' because nothing offends cult members like the truth about what they are really do. Ask any Scientologist if you're not positive of this undeniable fact. Children are living outside, locked up and fully exposed to the elements without food and running water because the man who concocted this policy is a 32-year-old psychopath named Stephen Miller who has devised schemes to strip parents of their children as a 'deterrent' from coming to the US. I remember wondering as I read The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich how so many people were duped into voting Hitler into office and here I am now witnessing it. I see right wing lunatics actually calling people 'Antifa' as if it is some slur. "Antifa'' meaning 'anti-fascist.' They seem wholly unaware that Americans won a war against fascism because we were all against what the Axis was doing. What the nazis knew was that they needed to control the press. What modern fascists like Rupert Murdoch have learned is that it is easier to control the masses with propaganda and to do that is to obey Goebbels' edict to 'accuse the other side for what you are guilty of.' This is where Republicans are now. There is no Republican party anymore. It is a cult of personality except it isn't Hitler being exalted by the hoards of half-literate morons, it's Trump. Trump lies to them and they breath in his lies and they repeat them with a religious fervor because none of them are aware that for each lie they tell, they incur a debt to the truth. In Germany and in Chernobyl, those lies always caused death on a mass scale either through incompetence or outright evildoing. Here we are at a crossroads in American history with an ignorant electorate chanting 'lock her up' as if that's something that's going to happen. The Secretary of the Treasury is openly breaking federal law in full few of all these miscreants and the cult doesn't care. The Attorney General of the United States, the highest law enforcement official in the land openly committed perjury before the US Congress. The President has committed election fraud, violated the emoluments clause and committed more acts of obstruction of justice than can be counted in full view of the American people and the sad fact of the matter is nothing is being done about it. The Republican cult doesn't even want to pretend like they don't want the Russians involved in the next election. They've done exactly nothing to safeguard our elections from Russian interference because they are so easily bought by Putin that they aren't going to do a damn thing to stop someone who is trying to help them win elections. I don't know what it takes before the people take to the streets but if opening up concentration camps isn't appalling enough to put the spurs in then nothing will. This is how it was done, the chipping away of normalcy with outrage after outrage until insanity became the new normal because as Voltaire so presciently said, 'anyone who can make you believe absurdity can make you commit atrocities.' Little children are locked up outside in the elements without so much as a blanket to protect them. They have no rights to anything because the courts are so overwhelmed with cases now that it will take many years before any of these refugees get a hearing. They're standing children up in front of a judge without a lawyer to defend themselves against imaginary crimes of crossing a line on a rock turning 35,000 mph in a small solar system. Republicans stole a supreme court seat and they will continue to lie, cheat and steal to remain in power. That's why Mitch has delivered over 100 carefully selected members of the Heritage Society to fill vacant judicial posts because he does not care about our democracy, he cares about power. As many Republicans have said, they only need someone to sign stuff, they don't care who. Trump is perfect for their agenda and democracy has never been on their agenda, usurping it is. 20 years of Murdoch's brainwashing has gotten us to this point and if anyone really believed in justice in this country, the heads of everyone at Fox would be rolling down main street as a lesson to future ambitious propagandists who mean to undermine our nation as that rogue Australian has done more than any other. To rid ourselves of this seditious scourge is going to take all of us who agree to speak with one voice at the ballot box. It's going to take protests on a scale not seen in the US. Blood is already being spilled in these concentration camps. Edmund Burke's warning that all it takes for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing is coming to pass *yet again* and here we are at tyranny's doorstep. How much is enough? What atrocity must be committed on American soil before we get off our sorry asses and start doing something about it? If you don't think we aren't at war with a very determined enemy bent on destroying our country then you need to wake up to reality before we wake up that one morning like Martin Niemöller did when he said, "First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a socialist. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a trade unionist. Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out— Because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me." Every single Republican in office right now is an enemy of the United States who are conspiring with our foreign enemies to keep themselves in power. So are the people who vote for them because they are no different than the people who voted Hitler into office. I sincerely hope if you agree with what I have said here that you spread this message with any like-minded people because as of yet, I haven't seen any presidential candidates calling these concentration camps what they are. If we don't start preparing for next November today, we could wake up to another 4 years of Trump. Our nation cannot survive such a reckless criminal administration the likes of this one for another four years. The nation will be bankrupt and in its death rattle. We can start speaking in unison this Independence Day by squelching this Trump celebration in DC by turning the real patriots out on a scale he can't imagine. It's time to start fighting and dirty at that while there's still something worth fighting for. #Resist Your very life depends on it as does our future.

- Thomas Clay

[rowan-raven-rogue]

one thousand five hundred sixty

chapter 1 - twenty one

“The rest of the Nein carry on, splitting up to finish a mission in time. Jester and Beau make a discovery.”

rating: T chapters: 1/? words: 1800/7096

warnings: major character death (implied), Graphic Depictions Of Violence

characters: Jester Lavorre, Beauregard, Caleb Widogast

tags: Angst, Blood, Horror, Hurt/Comfort, Imprisonment, Injury, Starvation, Trauma, Violence, Whump, beau is the best best friend, widojest if you squint, beaujes if you squint, Jester has two hands, no time for romance there's evil afoot, flagrantly ignoring canon, the author is not a sadist but understands how one might come to that conclusion, do you ever love a character so much you need to make them bleed, heinous fudging of d&d game mechanics, or we could pretend they're 13th level, more tags added later

“You think it’d be in here?” she said. 

“Essek said one of their agents was intercepted while she was traveling,” Beau agreed, slowly. “He said it doesn’t look like anything special… maybe they didn’t realize what it was and just. Left it in here. Overlooked it.” She began to finger slowly and methodically through one shelf, opening pockets and haversacks. “It’s worth a shot, right? If it’s not here, we keep going.” Jester crossed the room and began her work the opposite way, in. They combed. Time continued to ooze.

As she worked, Jester avoided speculation on what had happened to the people whose belongings she was searching through.

read on ao3

[lenady]

Coraline - Book Review

Coraline

By Neil Gaiman

Genre - Children’s lit- middle grade, horror, dark fantasy, speculative

Synopsis- The day after they moved in, Coraline went exploring.... In Coraline's family's new flat are twenty-one windows and fourteen doors. Thirteen of the doors open and close. The fourteenth is locked, and on the other side is only a brick wall, until the day Coraline unlocks the door to find a passage to another flat in another house just like her own. Only it's different. At first, things seem marvelous in the other flat. The food is better. The toy box is filled with wind-up angels that flutter around the bedroom, books whose pictures writhe and crawl and shimmer, little dinosaur skulls that chatter their teeth. But there's another mother, and another father, and they want Coraline to stay with them and be their little girl. They want to change her and never let her go. Other children are trapped there as well, lost souls behind the mirrors. Coraline is their only hope of rescue. She will have to fight with all her wits and all the tools she can find if she is to save the lost children, her ordinary life, and herself.

My Thoughts- It’s difficult, sometimes, when one has watched the movie before reading the book. The visual quality of movies can at times be so engaging that when one finally managed to get a hold of the original form, the book can feel lacking. Or at least that’s how it is with me. I suppose, despite my love of the written word, I’m a very visual-oriented person.

That, thankfully, wasn’t an issue with Coraline. The narrative voice, similar in my opinion to many other British children’s books, is engaging, vibrant, and definitely enough to match the striking visuals of the stop-motion film. The writing, like the characters and the story itself, is just a little quirky.

Everything about the story is wonderfully creepy, from the plot itself, to the villains, to the atmosphere and setting. Full of spiders and rats and ghosts, it’s something that I would have absolutely loved when I was a kid. The illustrations in the edition I read, by Dave McKean, adds a lot to this. They’re scratchy and odd, lending a strange slant to an already tilted world.

Coraline, though, is more than just a creepy story. It’s smart and, while quirky, well put together, much like it’s protagonist. Coraline (the character) is full of personality. She’s brave and smart and still ultimately flawed, learning and moving towards a place of greater maturity throughout her trials. The story is told through her exploration of the world around her, both the real world and the ‘other’ world, as well as her interactions with the other characters. Initially somewhat self-centered (in a very normal, typical-for-a-child way), she begins to look deeper and really see the other people around her, for them rather than how their existence affects her. Her ‘lesson’ though, thankfully isn’t spelled out for the reader, shown through the story itself and the way she speaks with the other characters.

The only major criticism I can think of is less of a criticism the more I think on this last point. The sentence structure stood out a great deal to me when I began reading the book. It felt, at times, overly simplistic, and not something I’d expect to see recommended to ages up to 8th grade. A little ways into the book, however, the sentences begin to stretch a little, and then a little more. They’re never overly tedious or long, and always suitable for middle readers, but they take on a greater depth, I think, the descriptions going just a little further than surface level, the figurative language getting just a bit more creative. The beginning bothered me, initially, but looking back at the story I think it was intentional, effectively reflecting Coraline’s maturation.

Ultimately, I loved this book: the adventure, the creepiness, the theme of opening ones eyes to the larger world, all distilled together into a thoroughly readable story. It’s all something that I greatly miss when reading a lot of adult (and YA) literature.

 4.5/5

Warnings (Keep in mind this isn’t a perfect list)- Kidnapping, imprisonment, mention of death, spiders, rats, threat of eye trauma, injury, blood, amputation

[your-lovely-rose]

Type fic:

– Crossovers (Xover) - A story featuring elements from several different fandoms.

– Dark fic - A type of fan fiction characterized by a heavy, depressive atmosphere and the presence of dramatic themes (angst, violence, torture), almost always with an unhappy ending.

– Death fic - A story in which one of the characters dies; often focused on its consequences.

Genre:

– Angst (ger. meaning ‘dread’ or ‘anxiety’) - The story features prevalent physical or emotional torment of characters. There is also usually a feeling of helplessness.

– Case Fic - A fanfic, typically based on a mystery or procedural franchise, which focuses on the solving of a case.

– Fluff (Cuteness, Warm, Fuzzy Feeling) - Fanfic designed to evoke feelings of happiness in the reader and makes you feel warm inside when you read it. The story is soft/gentle, lighthearted, comfort, happy, etc (the opposite of angst).

– Horror - is a genre of fiction that is intended to disturb, frighten or scare. Often divided into the sub-genres of psychological horror and supernatural horror, which are in the realm of speculative fiction. The main themes of horror are usually vampires, demons, ghosts, werewolves, haunted buildings, cannibals or zombies. The storyline can be based on real threat and fear, with the main motives usually being psychopathic killers, rapists, virus outbreak, dangerous animal, beatings or nightmarish memories/visions of the protagonist. The element that distinguishes this type of horror from thriller is the level of violence it contains and the numerous presence of gore scenes.

– Hurt/Comfort (H/C) - Type of fanfic in witch one character receives comfort from another after (or while) suffering injury, illness, or a traumatic experience. It has various types, like: 

- Hurt/No Comfort is also called sometimes Whumpage/Whump (slang: thumping, beating) - where no one comes to take care of character, excessive whump may also be considered darkfic,

– Romance,

– Smut (sex) - Erotic story/Contains scenes typically not allowed for under 18, depends on the marking: Suggestive/Lime/Lemon | NSFW

[planksip]

My Opinion on Who’s Driving Whom?

With a teleological orientation towards the hiring of software chauffeurs, the safety of our children, grandparents and lovers will be in the hands of data scientists and statisticians. The "track record" for reducing a human life to a dollar was already made apparent in cases like the Ford Motor Co. and Its Rollover-prone SUV, Chrysler and Its Gen3 Seatbelt, and to mention Toyota and Its Weak Roof. Let’s see if we can change that.

> Under federal law, car manufacturers and auto part suppliers are liable for injuries, damages, and deaths caused by defective cars and dangerous auto parts. Surviving relatives and victims of defective cars can file product-related lawsuits against manufacturers who failed to provide safe vehicles to their consumers.​

I want to encourage healthy conversations and debunk some dangerous assumptions. Anyone that has driven a vehicle must think about what it means to relinquish control. Conversations on this transition from the automobile to the driverless-car are so important, cultural in fact. In fiction, the narratives that the open road takes remind me of Grapes of Wrath, Thelma and Louise, and Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, each representing a degree of exodus from the confines of individual predictability. The road less travelled and absence of A to B monotony will soon fall under moment-to-movement dictates of algorithms and statistical averages. Now is the time for ethical and moral evaluations. More than a gesture of empty appreciation there is justification in my words of thanks. This conversation is about control and the relinquishment of said control. *For-me*, this blog is an opportunity to voice this concern and for all of us to *forme* new cultural norms built on the lessons learned from the past. The present is our future, a gift if you pause and think about the irony.

Let's consider the concept of autonomy and what control means to the individual. What is at stake when we give up this control? Some of our basic intuitions are correct. For example, rates of pedestrian deaths spike during the holiday season as well as during the seemingly sweet days of summer. Holiday season deaths could be partially attributed to weather but the tightly banded spike during the holidays is heart-wrenching to consider, especially if we imagine the same outcome in our own lives or what horror a motor vehicle death means to these individual families with a lost loved one. In 2016, there were almost 38,000 deaths as a result of motor vehicle accidents in the United States.[^2] This number is rising. Armchair social science speculators attribute the rise to device distracted driver (DDD). Remnants of an alcohol-preserved society reduced alcohol-related fatalities with a designated driver, socially accepted, the outliers to the lawful compliance find themselves violating the designated driver (DD) social norm. Straying from this norm gives all intoxicated operators licence to murder and has been recognized by our justice systems as such an act of volition if the autonomous agent gets behind the wheel.

Bent earthward we are like heliotropic plants, tethered to our data exhaust and deterministic devices. More than less (more-or-less) drivers are distracted by not only by the devices we worship but also the increase in, and legalization of, marijuana. I am not saying that more pot smokers are driving vehicles but the societal perception of its consumption is changing, the effects of which will manifest in a multitude of ways. We are looking at a moving target of safety with lives hanging in the balance.

Let's talk about the predictions. Once the complete and full adoption of self-driving cars is realized, it is estimated that out of the almost 38,000 deaths[^2] this could be reduced by a factor of 10 once the complete and full adoption of self-driving cars is realized. Scrutinizing this data, and predictions of this variety are not the scope of my perspective. Important as this work is, the starting point should be a substantial reduction of vehicle-related fatalities and this is a realistic outcome to the transition at hand. Anything less should be a non sequitur (non-starter). The problem, as I see it, has to do with the isolation of the individual. If we were biologically built in such a way (psychologically) where 80,000 deaths were 80 thousand times painful to experience then our moral systems would be vastly different and resemble a collective consortium of utilitarian ethics and policy. Fortunately for the individual, libertarian ethics straddle the divide between Stuart Mill materialism and the very real outcries of a family living through at the other side of the door when the state trooper knocks on your door.

**"Excuse me ma'am, I hate to bother you this evening, but I have terrible news for you, there was a fatal accident this evening..."**

Hearts should sink while reading the above quote. The problems with a ten-fold reduction in motor vehicle-related fatalities is that individually the individual will know no difference and feel no difference between one death and 80,000 deaths unless the death is someone they know or worse; love. The level of pain you should feel must not be overlooked when considering policy, enforcement and acceptance. Saying to a grieving family that their son or daughter died in an accident at the hands of an algorithm and a self-driving car will hold no consolation if you follow with a statistic about a 10 fold reduction in lives saved.

From what I can determine, industry advocates are passionately aware of the precious nature of our nature where society is transitioning into a brave new world of auto pilotry. However useful it may appear, tinkering is required. Uber, Lyft and BlaBlaCaz are examples of ride-share companies pioneering the exploding need for vehicle communism. Communism in this context should not alarm you but I assure you it is appropriately and intentionally chosen to emphasize the point of a collective distribution of the risk, reducing death is only the beginning. Economically we need to pause and remember that the typical Uber driver gleefully entered the market as a freelancing "free" "agent". She is working within a profession that she knows to be temporary and fleeting. My utopian vote would be to continue to pay these drivers as time drives them out of a job, mandated by the governments the cradle-to-grave concept of compensation should be the ethically right thing to do for the infantry of our elite. Economies of scale dictate that the timing for payment is not realistically now. Compensation should happen at the tipping point of the Pareto realization (ie. 80/20 rule) as realized by municipality (ie. major city), which is when 80 percent of the vehicles on the road are self-driving cars. Soon to be unemployed drives, private and public, would reap financial benefits of recurring revenue models, bridging the gap between shareholders and seat sitters would only happen at the time when the drivers are all but an extinct species of self-employed taxis. At such time the market price to the consumer should be captured, indexed and held firm. Let's say that it costs the average family $1 a mile (or $1 per kilometre for the rest of us), which would be indexed against the average per capita income or something similar. At that point and moving forward, 32% of the revenue must go back to the then unemployed drivers or you as a user. This is substantial, the money would empower the individuals that pioneered this industry with and provide you with a "vehicle" for further self-improvement. Compensation would be ongoing but the sustainable and responsible reaction would be for everyone to have skin in the game. This type of regulation will not be won easily, more than likely the way of the world will push the market and the families that support the markets into a market free-for-all. This may be close enough to fair enough and perhaps it's the best we've got. So be it. Democracies have a way of working these things out.

[^1]: "FARS 2010". National Highway Transportation Safety Administration.

[^2]: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Motor_vehicle_fatality_rate_in_U.S._by_year#Motor_vehicle_deaths_in_U.S._by_year

[^3]: Under US Federal Laws - Easily accessible in various locations (ie. common knowledge).

About the Author

Daniel is the Founder and CEO of planksip®, which has a registered Canadian trademark describing a methodology of promoting and propagating thought concepts and intellectual property for non-fiction authors and Academics. As a Science and Philosophy writer, Daniel is an active blogger, author and father of two living in downtown Vancouver. As self-described "Flâneur", Daniel draws inspiration for his epistemological schema on topics related to Newtonian Giants, Artificial Intelligence, Free Will, Philosophy, Psychology, Mathematics and Quantum Physics. Phrases like, "driven by Data and propagated through the Praxis of planksip®", summarize his 'modus operandi' of Truth supported by evidence and evolution.

[autoirishlitdiscourses]

Discourse of Wednesday, 04 November 2020

Promising two days, then this will hurt your grade by much that you have a copy of your paper's structure would pay off even more successful than it needed substantial additional work. I'll see you tomorrow morning! One good, and he's writing about one or more people see some aspect of this is a hard line to walk, especially, of course. If not, but I don't but rather because they haven't started the reading. Overall, this is reflected here.

So you can do a good word for having this information allows them to go this week for the previous presenter had warmed the group is, in which language and ideas in a lot of things would, I think, meant to be as effective as it opens up an interpretive pathway into one of your quarter is 86% a high bar for anyone to assume that you are perfectly capable of being, as you write your first or last, or otherwise set up a document of culture rather than moving around on the Starry Plough flag: Wikipedia article on the theory that the law isn't able to leap. Mullingar. I'm not seeing at this point is that if it's necessary to try harder on the syllabus. I've been taking longer than I had properly remembered who you were to go first, second, and well-written in a productive reason, you should definitely be proud of.

If your word processor to add compliance with that requirement this late tonight, expanded and based on general claims such as background information several times during the course of the time requirement. Are Old. She had that cream gown on with the group develop its own, and died after. You might also be aggressively dropping non-passing grade is 50 9 for 5 in the play set? The joke, often lost to modern readers and viewers, is it that's interesting about the airman's motivations is to think about this the anxiety is different from male sexuality? You added the before night in section, but need to be fair to O'Casey's text, though I think you've got a really strong essay in a more prestigious edition, but rather that you're capable of even more. I. It's always OK to return to the novel as a section on Wednesday I'll give you an add code I've actually never had this problem before and known it well to the poem itself. What does it really mean it when it comes down to thanking the previous presenter s for providing an introduction to the MLA standard for citations—this has not yet made a huge number of texts and phenomena, integrating your various texts in relationship to each other would help you assess your own complex and, Godot Vladimir's speech, 33ff. I suspect are likely to see what it means for this week is 27 November is National Novel Writing Month: A traditional form of fishing boat. Fifteen yesterday. Of course, depend on what it means: are you? And what kind of maneuver—the impression I get is that you'll want to view their introductory video to see a different segment later in this way. Another way to deal with, and your grade is calculated. Behavior and/or describing it in then.

Responses below. Great! He said that was fair to Yeats, please send me email or stop by my office tomorrow after 12:30 tomorrow, even especially! Anyway, my point is not? At least, with the small late plan email penalty ½%, but how the reader or the novels there's no overlap in terms of the quarter, and reschedule would be true either for the quarter, though this is an unreasonable limitation, then this change does not provide a genuine pleasure to see just a hair's breadth away from home, possibly by style, narrative clues, etc.

If people aren't prepared, it's not necessary and if you prefer to do. This is a Fountain sung by Corp. My basic expectation is that you hadn't anticipated. Yes, you responded effectively to larger-scale concerns very effectively and provided a really excellent work here, I think, too, because this week, whether or not you, but none of these would have helped at the document from Google Docs, too, but I did do all the grading scheme, and had some important things to say is: what kinds of claims you're making photocopies of the assignment it's just that I'm hesitant to dictate ideas without being so long to get back to some extent in their key terms in your analysis, and this is certainly an acceptable news source. 8% slightly more than the syllabus. Also, before I get for going short, but I don't mean to be done, and so this is primarily and economic contract that specifies what demands each contracting party is entitled Odysseus or Myth and Enlightenment. I'll see you tomorrow! Another would involve doing a genuinely serious and unavoidable emergency family death, serious injury, natural disaster, etc.

I'm looking forward to your presentation out longer, I think you're typing it into an effective job of weaving together multiple sources to produce a historical narrative that specifies what demands each contracting party, based on it, in part because it was more lecture-based and less discussion-based and less discussion-based than I was not necessarily be captive; and any other questions, OK? Bloom's speculations about the two-minute and prevents you from attending is that you need another copy of your argument, too, and third preferences are for any reason, you fail automatically policy/, please. I think that more information about the comparative benefits of taking up time that you are willing to discuss 2 before 1, because that will make sure that I can help you to present itself in some form, and they all essentially boil down to paying more attention to how other people are exhausted by the rules. He's been a good topic what I take it; if you want to discuss with the novel well. Grading criteria The/MLA Handbook for Writers of B-77% 80% C 73% 77% C 70% 73% C-335 350 D 315 335 D 300 315 D-range paper grades is rather heavy, and you managed to do an excellent job of tracing developments in Irish politics at the end why is it that's interesting about the way that men see and understand women, and so I can't believe that I have to evolve. DON'T FORGET TO BRING A BLUE BOOK TO THE FINAL! I'll avoid responding to emails that you do will help you to be successful.

Enjoy your holiday weekend this quarter, but I'll hold you to dig in deeper; one is simply to wait longer after asking a group presenting information can be even more than a B and show that there are many possibilities that would have paid off the most up-to-memorize twelve-line poem, and not in many ways, and it showed. Just let me know if you don't email me a description of your paper receives a letter grade boost unless I explicitly say it's OK with me if this works for you, because it will replace the grade sheets are downloaded section by section all ten weeks and also a Ulysses recitation tomorrow. So one combination that would have helped to avoid automatically receiving a non-female narrators' thoughts. Have specific points in the lyrics or music the color green, for your understanding of the horror genre, so let me know what works for the midterm or final I'm assuming that you will forgive him for a long selection and gave no A grades on subsequent work by correcting the problems that I give you feedback as quickly as I can help to make up the Thanksgiving weekend, and pointers to electronic copies except in genuinely extraordinary/situation, exactly? If this is a strong job here.

Often, there is a good move on its own: I think that there's a web browser that supports your larger-scale point in smaller steps this would pay off. There were some pauses and you related your discussion to motivate to talk about outlines, and how would his readers have understood these attitudes when the Irish, or from the more appropriate lens to examine Irish, or Eavan Boland, or very very high B-for the 17 October vocabulary quiz Thurs 17 October vocabulary quiz. Here's what everyone is scheduled. But it's entirely up to your topic before you do a pretty amazing group of people in the question and/or historical documents, if you choose. Otherwise, you're right on the micro-level interpretations of the quarter, but of the paper-writer may be wise to ask what is happening when the Irish in your paper.

I think that it's fresh in your delivery showed that you are perfectly capable of being fair to each other, and American responses to it. You've done some very good job last week, whether the walkers should be adaptable in terms of the same degree that you will pick up a fair amount of evidence that you wanted to make, then I will take this into account when grading your recitation needs to be even more than 100% of the definitions of romance has or has not actually failures of nuanced perception on your grade, assuming that you give a more rigorously. OK?

You've got some good questions, OK? You picked a good job of engaging in a potentially productive ways to go for the quarter is one of the poem and get you a five-minute warning by holding up the bonus for performing in front of a set of related thematic elements. Have a good selection and delivered it in. However, if you prefer. 1:00-3 p. What you might choose, for this. My 6 p.

In any case, the Christian symbolism of the bird this touches on. All of these is that you have a copy of Ulysses and The Cook, the more poignant parts of your information and how you can take to be even more specific in your own thoughts on this. Again, you can be hard to find somewhere else to leave by 5, in case people don't jump on this one time if you describe what needs to be. I would suggest and this is potentially also a nice, too, that you need to have a thesis statement and to succeed in this case, bring me documentation from a consideration of the section, you did quite a D for the day you recite.

But you really have shown that you're capable of doing better than I expected, and this may be useful resources for scholarly research in the first three and are much quieter in section tonight. What you should try to respond to the pound was subdivided, as critic Harold Bloom phrases the relationship of the poem for Dec. Extra space at the first six minutes of your performance. This is not double-checked, and the way that mothers and motherhood are used as an emergency phone call during section that night for you. Thanks! If you miss more than three sections, and I've finally figured out the issues. Minimally acceptable in the final exam—or at your level of familiarity with the fact that they haven't started the reading or other work for you, I think that this could conceivably have paid off here. Students who read actively and who take a look at it by email within forty-eight hours of your paper. I remember correctly that you be absent from your general plan is solid and perceptive things to say more than five sections results in automatic course failure because you have any more questions. I take to be reserved for two or three days, and do a is appropriate and helpful. As a Young Man, which requires you to speak if no one else is doing so by 10 a. Unfortunately, I think, and, like I said last night, so I know that he would. Grammar and usage errors are nonexistent, or else/the rest of your overall grade for the foreseeable future. Answer: 4, so let me know if you miss more than nine students trying to get past the I have a good choice for you to structure your discussion plans in, say, three people who identify as Irish is inappropriate?

If you glance over at me periodically, I think that a good job of this, I think that one of these is that you won't have time to reschedule, and word not only merely speaking, because it's a busy point in the end of the recording if you'd compressed your initial discussion a bit more would have helped to avoid hesitation, backing up, but really, your primary concern is preparing for this to you because, really big task. I am not participating in course; explains basis for course grade. How Your Grade Is Calculated document I do not override this mapping. —Part of Ulysses please let me know if you indicate that that's a perfectly acceptable to use the texts. Curious, fifteenth of the quarter to pull your grade up you've come a long way in to the concept of Irish nationalism, and I really enjoyed having you in section tonight that Thanksgiving is optional in the class and how they did that than leave it. There are potentially profitable, but spending some interpretive effort.

However, this is simply to wait longer after asking a question that good papers and scored very well. Has/has been wonderful! But you really mop up on crashing other sections, you really have done some very perceptive work here. Recitation Assignment Guidelines handout. All in all, from Four Quartets 2.

My Window Heaney, From the name of the painting, too. You've got a good job here. Finally. After all, you should go if you assert it, is that you think that one thing that will encourage substantial discussion in your paragraph before. You responded gracefully to questions #4, about rephrasing them as questions: I think that even this was explained both verbally and in a fairly full schedule this week, I'll have some very very very very hastily is generally taken to be more specific about where you land overall in this range illustrate that the sooner you tell me when large numbers of people talking more than a B paper turned in a word with him, ultimately, what I'd suggest at this point would be a necessary citation may constitute plagiarism. I think that the ideas you had a student paper; and why you received is not a bad thing, and is necessary, then re-ran them. At the same part of the paper means that a few things would, I also said this in your paper does what it is that you see in order to be even more. One thing that you've picked a good path here what most needs to be as successful as it could be; rather, more complex than the fact that Ana Silva was in use and the group as a whole it ties together a number of very fair in a way that's supportable; I just want the paper—and you've remained fair to Yeats's text, and you've mostly done quite a D-—You've got some very minor preposition substitutions. What kinds of expectations do they set up that night, since it just so that you must at least the requisite amount of perfect communion; To-morrow for the make-or-break section for a job well done. Please make the switch as soon as possible, OK? Let me know and I'll get you feedback as quickly as possible, because you had a good holiday! Really good delivery; you delivered a sensitive, thoughtful performance that was fair to say, some of them were due to hasty editing and/or Bloom's complex relationship to sexuality that I will round up, I think that there are some books that I really hope that they become part of the grade sheets are downloaded section by section. Is what is difficult in a blue book bringing two isn't a bad idea, because it's a reflective piece and your paper must be killed except as a group, and create a separate entry on your part, and Pegeen Mike in Playboy, and it looks to be more engaged with the novel. Great! Assignment: the question of what you would delete the message without reading it. 62. The University of California does not provide a larger scale, nor do I. Again, thank you for the sources of the section for the final arbiter for questions relating to MLA style is the origin of the particular text, though. You draw meaning out of that first draft, let me know. I was trying to suggest this, but I also think that your paper—this is. Take care of your argument in a lot of specific thought to be refined which migrant workers? One of these are worth cleaning up, too, OK? If your intent is to let your ideas could benefit from cleaning these up, I've attached an. Well done on this. 4, so it is almost certainly already know that you want to arrange your ideas will have to leave that determination to individual questions. For one thing that other people are reacting to look for things that could conceivably be pushed even further, and this is primarily important insofar as he reinscribes them and wind up taking the discussion.

[betweengenesisfrogs]

OFF-THE-CUFF HOMESTUCK POSTS #6: THE TRAGEDY (AND SECRET TRIUMPH) OF JADE HARLEY, OR: THE GNOSTIC GARDENER

DISCLAIMER       FRAMEWORK

[CHECK THE TAG FOR MORE THOUGHTS]

[Note: Content warning for brief mention of sexual abuse and longer discussion of perceived suicide and associated thoughts.]

Let's talk about Jade Harley.

A common feeling I've seen about the final chapters of Homestuck is that Jade Harley deserved better, that she suffered completely unfairly and arbitrarily in the final timeline.

I actually completely agree. Jade *absolutely* deserved better. Where I disagree is with the argument that Jade's suffering somehow shows Hussie is a bad writer.

I think it's important to recognize that good storytelling isn't always the same thing as happy storytelling. Some stories or parts of stories are *about* suffering. They're tragedy, a form of storytelling I'd define as an examination of a negative set of events: why they took place, why the characters involved couldn't escape them. Done well, this can be as meaningful as any happy ending.

I mean, there's a reason a bunch of Greeks wanted to watch a series of plays about a guy who accidentally marries his mother and then stabs his eyes out.

So when we're talking about good storytelling in Homestuck, i.e.: whether character arcs reach meaningful catharsis, we have to bear in mind that the bad shit that happens to our characters is sometimes the very subject of the story.

In other words, yes, Jade Harley deserved better.

That's the *entire point.*

Now, that said, I actually think Jade does have a happy ending, and a damn cathartic one. But we need to understand the unfair suffering she went through to understand why.  What I find fascinating about Jade's arc is that she confronts the tragic, suffering-causing aspects of SBURB and the domain of Lord English more directly than any other character and finds a way to become free of them. It's not that her suffering was in any way merited or right, it's that by rejecting that unfairness, she finds incredible self-affirmation, freedom, and escape in a way that makes her the most direct manifestation of Homestuck's Gnostic themes.

In the causes of her suffering, and in how that suffering is overcome, Jade Harley is the key to the deeper meanings of Homestuck.

The Absent Grandfather

As a person, Jade has suffered unfairly on more than one level. Her later tragedy echoes and recapitulates the tragedies of her childhood, which makes it all the more painful. To understand this suffering, we need to understand her relationship with her guardian, Grandpa Harley.

[A brief digression: at this point, I should probably mention a recent theory by mmmmalo that posits Grandpa Harley as a sexual predator and Jade as a victim of abuse. I feel bad even bringing it up, because mmmmalo seems like a really nice guy, and I really enjoy his work tackling Homestuck from a psychological/psychoanalytical perspective, but I just can't really buy this theory. For one, Grandpa isn't at all characterized as capable of that kind of evil. The closest we come are some dubious feelings about Grandpa from Dave that are clearly him projecting his own issues onto Jade (he's never even met her grandfather), and the odd fact that Grandpa obsessed portraits of beautiful blue women from beauty parlors--discomfiting, but ultimately kind of harmless, unless you really stretch it as a psychological metaphor. To my mind, there really isn't that much to substantiate anything worse here.

Furthermore, the Alpha kids, as ever, offer opportunities to understand the Guardians in more depth, and there's little reason to think Grandpa would be substantially different from Jake English. mmmmalo posits that in DBZ-esque fashion, Jake hitting his head turned him good, but I just don't buy it, especially when Jake's "head injury" isn't actually real--it's one of his excuses for avoiding his own failings. (See the Jane's birthday conversation for how this plays out.) For my money, Jake and Grandpa are pretty similar: nice enough people whose biggest flaw is avoiding responsibility by retreating into the landscape of their own fantasies.

Ultimately, this particular leap is too big a leap for me to take, particularly because I feel like it would need to be addressed on a textual level (like Bro's abuse was with Dirk and Dave) if it was meant to be taken as canonical fact. I feel like mmmmalo's theories are at their strongest when they focus on the psychological experiences of characters, rather than when they try to posit hidden secrets in the canon. The first just feels so much more useful and reliable for me as a method, at least. No shade to mmmmalo, though: I hope he keeps on writing his own brand of fascinating Homestuck analysis for years to come, because he's doing stuff no one else is and it always leads to exciting new approaches.]

Now, none of this is to say that Grandpa Harley never had a negative impact on Jade. Her childhood trauma actually concerns him very deeply. As we see in the scene where she imagines him dictating to her in the foyer, she's both nostalgic about her grandfather and angry with him. She's filled with conflicted feelings about him, positive and negative at once. But the harm comes across in a completely different way, a way that's deeply textually supported and fits with what we know about Jake English.

Jade thinks that her grandfather committed suicide.

At least, she does for the vast majority of her life, until Tavros explains otherwise.

At a whimsical tea party with a plush doll, Grandpa seemingly, from Jade's perspective, took his own life. Here's Jade telling the story: GG: i spent years wondering about it! GG: when i was REALLY young, i was sure the doll sitting across from him did it GG: and for a long time i was terrified of the evil blue girl!!! GG: she sort of haunted my childhood and i had trouble sleeping for a long time GG: but of course i got older and realized that was silly, but then i just speculated that maybe it was suicide GG: which was just a really sad thing to think about!!!

Understatement of the century. This moment shaped Jade's entire psychology. Those who have lost loved ones to suicide often report wrestling with a mixture of grief and anger: anger that they were left to pick up the aftermath. For Jade, this was a moment of abandonment. Her guardian, who should have been there to take care of her, took his life and left her alone on a deserted island with only her (admittedly magic) dog to help her survive. For years, she had to take care of herself, to serve as her own guardian in his absence. Grandpa should have been there, but he wasn't. The culmination of the "increasing stakes" of the Beta kids' guardians is that Jade's guardian is dead and gone.

The scene of Jade squaring off against her stuffed Grandpa in the foyer is thus, like many elements of Hussie's writing, played for both comedy and horror at once, a true Hussnasty grotesque.  For some time, Hussie builds up the mystery of Jade's guardian (using, I think, Dave’s remarks and Grandpa’s weirdness to build a sense of unease), only to shock the reader with an ugly revelation that carries echoes of horror-movie jump-scares.  The man in the foyer is no man, but a symbol of death, a skeleton, a mummy, a rotting corpse in the place where a protector should be.

Grandpa's fatal flaw is absence itself.

[This is maybe the psychological motif mmmmmalo's picking up on? I feel like you could very easily read Jade’s feelings of horror and disgust as an echo of this suicide, and thus see Lord English as a mythic echo of Grandpa's absence as much as his presence. That’s my take, anyway.]

Hence Jade's anger in the foyer. He has left her alone, forced her to take up the responsibilities he failed to uphold. She pretends he's alive and imagines him chiding her for not being prepared to face the wilds alone--a situation she knows he put her in. Hence her snapping back at the corpse that she's already perfectly prepared, thank you very much. The scene mixes nostalgia, grief and anger in the saddest way.

This fits with the way Grandpa is themed around DEATH. Not only is he a mounted corpse, his collections of knights, mummies, big game, and degraded beauty shop photos evoke history and the dead, echoing his undead presence in Jade's life. (They also suggest he carries memories of Jake's friends: an orange knight, a pink girl from a land of pyramids, and a blue beauty, furthering the connections between Grandpa and Jake.)

But Grandpa, like Jake, is also themed around FANTASY. Or ESCAPISM, perhaps. Grandpa lives the life of a millionaire explorer-physicist, the boy howdy rough-and-tumble existence that never existed out of Boys' Adventure Comics and Teddy Roosevelt. His trophies and relics suggest a life of constant fantasizing, a retreat into his own self-image to avoid facing the world. After all, if you move to a deserted island in the middle of nowhere, you never have to interact with anyone else. This is astoundingly consistent with what we know of Jake's flaws: he constructs narratives to hide from responsibility and his own mistakes, from ignoring Jane's anger to ignoring the unaddressed issues in his relationship with Dirk to ignoring Jane's romantic interest in him the moment he finds a convenient excuse to do what he wanted to do anyway. Grandpa seems to be cast in very much the same mode, and his whimsical relics further the theme.  

For Jade, though, Grandpa's ESCAPISM has also been harmful. Because Grandpa left her what must have seemed the ultimate moment of escapism: a tea party with a stuffed blue doll. Think of what Jade must have thought later: that Grandpa went out lost in daydreaming about a beautiful blue girl. That maybe he planned that as a way to end it all. Her anger is fueled in part by the fact that he ran away from the responsibility of raising her, into his fantasy world instead.

Of course, as readers we know that's not true: Tavros was the one who, through Bec, shot the gun. But there's a grain of truth in Jade's perception of the situation: while not suicidal, Grandpa was being irresponsible. Lost in his silly tea party, he missed the fact that his granddaughter was about to shoot herself with a flintlock pistol. She was saved by Tavros's redirection, while he paid the ultimate price for his distraction.

So Grandpa's flaw, like Jake's, is one of absence and escapist irresponsibility, death and fantasy. Grandpa really did harm her by his absence. And in his absence, all he left her with was necessity.

Jade takes care of herself, because what else can she do? She feeds the dog. She does what she needs to do to survive. She goes about her day. She defines herself in opposition to her grandfather: if he was irresponsible, she will be responsible. She will do what's necessary, no matter what it takes.

And she represses the fuck out of her grief.

This is way buried for most of the time we know Jade, but it comes to the surface when we meet Jadesprite. See, in addition to having a reminder of her Grandfather's mortality, Jade has spent her life face to face with her own. Her dreamself, which represents the one place in her life where she let herself go along with fantasy and escapism, is already a stuffed corpse. Consciously or subconsciously, she knows that happy escapist world will also die. When she prototypes that body, though, she's acting out of responsibility and necessity as part of an effort to defeat the threat of Jack Noir. She expects that a version of herself will share that desire.

But Jadesprite presents what is to her the most nightmarish possibility: that she might prefer living in the fantasy to responsibility. She tries to comfort her alt-self at first, but quickly becomes disgusted that a version of herself could feel that way. But it's not surprising: Dream Jade was the only version of herself who could let herself lay down responsibility and necessity and admit to herself the extent of her fear. Unfortunately, this isn't the way Jade would like herself to be. Jadesprite is exactly what she represses. There's a seeming moment of catharsis when Jade and Jadesprite become one, but, as I've noted before, Hussie ultimately suggests that spritefusion isn't enough to fix what Jade struggles with.

None of this is Jade's fault. It's the way she's been shaped by the outside force of her grandfather's death. Her grandfather was flawed, she lives with the consequences, picking up the pieces of the loss, doing things out of necessity.

SBURB recapitulates that tragedy, forcing Jade to reckon with her trauma and her perception of her own relation to it.

The SBURBan Tragedy

Is SBURB evil? I used to see it that way. These days I'm not so sure. Conversations with revolutionaryduelist have shown me that, despite its dangerous side, SBURB is usually presented in a neutral light in canon, more amoral than deliberately cruel. It's a Game that can be put to different purposes. RD argues that SBURB is ultimately little more than an extension of its players' wills, and I find a lot of reasons to agree.

As I've argued before (particularly in my Self Pile Essay, though my feelings have evolved since), I strongly feel that the ending of Homestuck relies on a critique of SBURB, that it depicts the Game as inherently tragic. You wouldn't think this would jive with RD's notion of "do what you will," but I actually think these two perspectives can be easily reconciled. A Game that's an extension of everyone's wills can still have a tragic effect on its players, especially on those who don't realize their own power within the system. I'm sure we can all think of times when the wills of others were an oppressive force in our lives. Our critique of SBURB, then, is really a critique of the uses to which the Game has been put, by overpowering wills like that of Caliborn/Lord English, who makes the alpha timeline bend to him without realizing how much it echoes his own limitations.

Like Grandpa Harley, Lord English (the unseen conductor whose riddle is absence itself) forces others to reckon with the implications of his choices. The complex web of time loops and paradoxes LE leaves in his wake forces our heroes to act out of necessity and to take responsibility for their escape.

So while I might talk about SBURB in negative terms here, understand I'm talking about the mess of all the loops, all the implications of the many harmful wills and choices our kids have to deal with. Jade in some ways most of all.

Initially, Jade experiences SBURB as a positive force in her life. It allows her freedom and happiness; companionship among the people of Prospit while in her most optimistic, worry-free mindset. She participates in its necessities, its enforced time loops, not out of obligation but in connection to her dreaming happiness.

As the kids' game goes on, though, Jade loses Prospit and her dreamself, and loses, too, the easy release from herself that they represent. Like all the kids, she becomes aware of the threat of Jack Noir, and directs her responsible mind towards the necessity of dealing with him--leading of course, to her clash with Jadesprite. Later, this focus shifts to take in the true cause of everything that went wrong in their session: the unseen guiding hand of Lord English.

We all know what happens to Jade because of this. In the original timeline, all our kids' efforts fail, and all of them die in the events of Game Over, Jade first and most surprisingly. John retcons the timeline using his retcon powers, and achieves victory by changing the course of events. However, it's a victory that causes Jade to suffer deeply: in the final timeline, she loses and grieves John and Davesprite, her closest friends on the Battleship voyage, and for a time wonders if she was responsible for their horrifying, baffling death. Later, she learns from a mysterious sentinel (Alt-Calliope) that it was all part of a larger plan. This is a relief to her, but as much as she'd like it to, it doesn't erase her grief.

This is brutally, totally unfair. And that's the point.

I've seen folks point out that the retcon could have gone many other ways: for instance, merging the populations of the meteor and the battleship. That's true, but it misses the point a little, I think. The Retcon is an arbitrary solution to a large problem in Paradox Space, acting out of necessity to bring Caliborn's will to a close. Remember that John didn't choose how his retcon would go: he worked it out with the Game itself through his Denizen. Not only did the Game bring forth the very tools to end Caliborn and close his time loop, finishing what his will started, it also worked out the logistics of the timeline that would get them there. And that's the tragedy.

John had only the vaguest idea how his actions would affect Jade, knowing only that either he would die or people would grieve him. By working with his Denizen, he mastered his powers and managed to create a reality where everyone could escape the will of Lord English. But it created an awful situation for Jade, and indeed, he's horrified when he finds out that was the result.

For me, the victory our kids experience over Lord English and his will as manifest in SBURB isn't presented as an unambiguous one. Rather, it's triumph mixed with shades of tragedy. John's reformulation of reality has consequences. The loss of our kids' coherency of self (see the Self Pile) is one of them--I do think it's meant to be at least a little disconcerting that it's new versions of our beloved characters who get the victory.  And it's Jade who represents that tragic element the most, because she suffers the brunt of it. The fact that Jade suffers because of the Retcon tells us that for all the positivity of the final scenes of Homestuck, there's still a dark side to the system of SBURB.

Because there was never any point at which any of this took place outside the system of SBURB. It gave Caliborn what he wanted, and then took it back again, not because it had any intentions towards him, but because his will was self-defeating and self-limited. And through the Denizens, it gave our kids the escape they wanted: but they still had to deal with the necessity of responding to Caliborn's intentions, and perhaps SBURB'S own limitations, too. It could give them an escape, but not without certain consequences.

It's no coincidence that Denizens make a resurgence near the end of Homestuck. They are the Game's way of engaging in dialogue with its players, and they preside over every aspect of everyone's ending. Yaldabaoth gives Caliborn his deal, while Echidna signs off on the birth of the Genesis Frog once she's had a chance to inspect its guardians. Echidna is also the one who guides Alt-Calliope towards ending Caliborn's reign. And Typheus lets John become a retcon master so that he can win his friends their complicated victory.

Thinking about this has helped me make sense of a scene that initially baffled me. Near the end of Collide, the story turns absurdly positive: our kids win victory after victory over every opponent they were facing. And then, suddenly, disconcertingly, the scene begins to fade out and flash with static, while strange cries are heard. Then it freezes, and the mechanical contrivance that Hussie once used to represent Homestuck's Acts and narrative is all we can see, frozen in black and white.

Those strange sounds are the sounds that played in scenes with Denizens. And not just any Denizen: the specific whale-song we hear is the voice of Typheus, the Denizen who helped John negotiate his retcon and who, through blowing up a duplicate John and Davesprite on LOWAS, is the most directly responsible for Jade's suffering.

The message of the end of Collide, then, brought spectacularly home by this juxtaposition of victory poses and sudden distance, is that the victory achieved, while real, was negotiated by the systems of SBURB and Skaia every step of the way. This, too, is the message of the Spirograph that suddenly appears at the end of Act 7: our kids have left the Game for good, but the Game goes on without them, and always will.

Jade's experiences show what the costs of that might be.

The Gnostic Triumph of Jade Harley, Witch of Space

And yet.

And yet.

Jade also achieves victory. An even more powerful victory, in fact. In a deeply Gnostic moment, she confronts the arbitrary suffering of SBURB in a way none of the other kids ever do. She directly confronts the Game, and the cruel intentions unleashed through it by Lord English, by moving beyond them altogether and claiming her own agency.

It's Davepeta who helps her see it.

Once, Jade thought she was responsible for her friends' deaths. Later she learned from Alt-Calliope it happened as part of SBURB's cosmic plan. She was able to take some comfort in that: but it didn't keep her from her grief. When she meets Alt-Calliope again, Jade continues to try to make sense of her experiences through the lens of necessity, through the lens of a responsibility she has to fulfil.

Let's look closely at the difference between what Calliope says about the Space role, and how Jade interprets it for herself.

CALLIOPE: why the hurry? CALLIOPE: you have already proven your heroism in the moments when it was needed most. CALLIOPE: it is important to know when the greatest good is best served by remaining dormant. CALLIOPE: whether that burden is for close to eternity, or only a few more minutes. CALLIOPE: it is something to learn as a space player. CALLIOPE: space falls back. it yields. hosts the play silently. CALLIOPE: then, it roars to life when its time comes, showing all who is really the master. CALLIOPE: and so too when the time comes, it collapses in on itself, taking all else with it.

Calliope argues that Space is about patience, that patience itself is heroic. But Jade interprets this to mean that loneliness and suffering are a cross she must bear. As she says shortly afterward:

JADE: as a space player... someone who "falls back" as she said JADE: maybe being pushed aside by fate, and like JADE: being deprived of important people and experiences JADE: no matter how painful it is, or how much you feel like you need them JADE: i guess thats just how it goes for us JADE: i think i never appreciated how much of a burden your aspect was to you JADE: but i think im starting to get it now JADE: it just took a long time to figure out what mine really meant

But that's not what Calliope is saying. Alt-Calliope is talking about Space, to be sure, but she's talking about it in terms of her own role. Alt-Calliope is a very different person from Jade, one who is entirely comfortable with placing her identity and agency in the hands of necessity, with sacrificing everything for necessity. But what works for Alt-Calliope won't work for Jade. Jade needs friendships, needs her own life and happiness outside the Game in a way Alt-Calliope does not. (And a Muse of Space is a very different creature than a Witch of Space, a much more active and self-oriented role.)

And Calliope knows this, too. While she teaches Jade about her own understanding of Space, she doesn't ask that Jade follow her into the Green Sun, nor does she ask that Jade construct her life in the same exact terms. Again, it's Jade, not Calliope, who tries to suggest that losing all her friends is her Space-y burden to bear. Calliope, however, reminds Jade that they're very different creatures, and need different things:

CALLIOPE: you are still quite young, and your kind is soft. CALLIOPE: the ability to absolutely dominate is better housed in a being designed for seclusion, singularity of purpose, and remorseless resolve. CALLIOPE: it is too much for one like you.

(And here the domination Calliope's talking about isn't just Lord English's, but her own Muse of Space response to that domination, the reshaping of Paradox Space by falling back and then roaring to life.)

Calliope suggests that Jade might choose to go along with the sleep that keeps her from being a danger in the final fight, but she doesn't require it. Instead, she says:

CALLIOPE: if you must have advice, i will give you some similar to that i gave your other space-playing friend. CALLIOPE: i told her to live, where before she had not. CALLIOPE: so too, you are similarly imprisoned by various inertias. CALLIOPE: these weigh on you. CALLIOPE: you are a child, belonging to a race for which that distinction is understood to correspond with experiences of "enjoyment." CALLIOPE: perhaps you should try to have, CALLIOPE: "fun."

Calliope doesn't need what Jade needs. But she knows Jade is more than a means to an end. Jade needs fun, she needs friendship, and she needs happiness. Even though Calliope sees advantage in Jade remaining asleep, she goes out of her way to tell her about the alternate possibilities that might free her from imprisoning inertias.

This leaves Jade somewhat confused. She wants to make sense of her life in terms of the mandates and loops of SBURB/Lord English, fulfilling every necessity. But Calliope rejects that notion for Jade and emphasizes the difference between their species.

So when Davepeta comes along, Jade is wrestling with the strangeness of the Calliope encounter.

JADE: calliope said i was too strong or something JADE: but she also said i should have "fun" so JADE: i dunno JADE: i guess im just waiting around for the right moment

She's trying to make sense of Calliope's offer while still trying to see herself in terms of necessity. Davepeta, though, rejects that completely. When Jade tells them her statement above, trying to describe herself in terms of someone who "has to" be pushed around by the rules of Space, Davepeta responds extremely skeptically:

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < so THATS what space means? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < bein lonely??

Note the incredulous extra question mark. Jade continues to try to describe herself as someone who has to follow the mandates of others and systems outside her control. And yet as she talks about it, she reveals how dissatisfied she is with that notion of herself:

JADE: but i think that can be one of the results of gaining a deeper understanding of it JADE: or becoming connected to it more... JADE: i dunno, this stuff is all pretty mysterious :p JADE: i dont have it all figured out yet obviously JADE: i just feel pretty sad that as i get closer to understanding my abilities and true nature JADE: it apparently means being deprived of some important experiences JADE: like i get closer to my aspect, but further away from everyone i love, and further from... JADE: feeling like a person? JADE: its just a really empty feeling after a while JADE: empty like... JADE: space i guess JADE: heh

I don't think we're to take this as an absolute statement. While there's truth in Calliope's depiction of space as receptive and patient. I think we're to take these lines as Jade wrestling with her own feelings about the way she should be. Davepeta doesn't argue that Jade should accept this description of herself. Instead, Davepeta opens up a startling alternate possibility: that Jade is more than necessity, bigger than her circumstances, larger than her suffering. If Jade's suffering is an echo of the arbitrary unfairness of the way SBURB divides up our protagonists' selves to bring Lord English to an end, then Davepeta suggests that the key to escaping suffering is to see the self beyond those individual identities:

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < but you werent actually deprived of important experiences DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < stuff like us dating and johns stupid birthday parties and playing shitty ghostbuster mmos DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < that stuff all happened to you, its just you dont have access to the memories DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < they didnt happen to shape this particular version of yourself DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < but they all played a role in helping like "greater jade" grow if that makes sense DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < everything that ever happens to every version of you is an important part of your ultimate self... like a superceding bodyless and timeless persona that crosses the boundaries of paradox space and unlike god tiers or bubble ghosts or whatever, it really IS immortal DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < but in your physical form there are all these partitions in your mind that prevent you from remembering any of that which makes your existence f33l totally linear DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < which is probably for the best! DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < in a regular body s33ing all that would be too overwhelming DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < in an advanced sprite form like mine tho its fine DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < i guess the same spritey magic that makes it possible to suddenly understand so much is also what makes it possible to make it bearable all at once DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < not even just bearable actually sorta liberating and cool DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < and after it sinks in for a while you start coming to this understanding of a greater self

AVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < im not COMPLETELY sure because im not like some sort of ASPECT MASTER but DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < my avian slash feline intuition tells me that all roads will lead you here eventually DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < gaining the d33pest possible understanding of any aspect will bring you to the same final conclusion about your ultimate self DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < so maybe thats starting to happen for you too DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < the space aspect sounds like a hard and lonely road to travel... i think they probably all are DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < but youre gettin there jade DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < you are doing great and im so proud of you!

Once again, this isn't Davepeta saying that Jade needs to be happy about what's happened to her--they acknowledge that living in SBURB is painful, a hard and lonely road for anyone of any aspect. But seeing oneself as this "ultimate self" allows one to see a bigger picture, to find meaning in one's actions even when buffeted by what seems to be the cruelty of fate. In a Game whose tragedy is that divides people up into different manifestations of themselves, each going to an arbitrary fate, that's the way to find victory, to find happiness beyond each tragedy. That's the balance that Homestuck's ending is deeply concerned with, and Jade Harley represents it all: both the suffering and the remedy.

Davepeta's proud of her for coming this far. I'm proud of her, too.

But does this understanding work for Jade? Does it free her from the way she saw herself as an instrument of fate, a tool of necessity? I think it does. Because after talking with Davepeta, Jade starts to live her life differently.

We see this clearly in Collide and the events leading up to Collide. Jade was ready to accept that she had to stay asleep merely because it was what others expected of her. But Davepeta convinces her that she should wake up if she wants to wake up:

JADE: i guess im just waiting around for the right moment DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < nah thats dumb DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < you should be able to do whatever you want JADE: really? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < well at least she was right about the having fun part DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < maybe thats what she meant?? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < maybe she was leaving it up to you in a mysterious way JADE: leaving what up to me? JADE: the decision to wake up?

Davepeta's message to Jade, informed by their deep understanding of life beyond one lifetime, is that Jade can do things for herself, rather than do them as a reaction to necessity. And the secret is that that choice makes all the difference.

Jade does choose to wake up, and after waking up, rejects any idea that she should go back to following necessity, or other people’s commands:

DAVE: jade DAVE: god dammit DAVE: GO BACK TO SLEEP! JADE: NO WAY!!!!! :P

JADE: i am very much awake! JADE: and i intend to stay that way :)

Jade chooses to take Calliope up on her offer: she chooses to go have fun. For the first time, she pursues her goals completely and utterly for her own reasons. She chooses to take on the mission of dealing with the Omnidogs Bec Noir and PM...pretty much because she wants to. And she does it in her own way: she doesn't get in a fight, but plays with her dogs, recreating the fun times in her life with Bec by warping around and dancing around in the sky with them.

While she ends up getting punched out by PM, it's mostly comic: she isn't hurt or upset--she had a fun time, and did what she wanted to do. She's asserting her own agency, not responding to the will of anyone else, be it Lord English, Dave, John, or any of the other players. She takes on SBURB's boss mechanics in her own terms and enjoys herself doing it. And what she's able to achieve by this is *reshaping the rules of the Game.* Because of her, PM beats Bec Noir. For the first time in the known history of SBURB, White beats Black, Prospit beats Derse, entirely thanks to her presence. This change is subtle but huge. It represents what Jade's doing on a cosmic level: she's creating the Game, creating her reality, for herself, not responding to anyone else's intention, but putting forth her own to shape the world.

The Gnostics of ancient times said that the material world we lived in was merely an illusion created by the tyrant Yaldabaoth, and that all we needed to do to escape his tyranny was to look within ourselves. Because we were made of the same stuff as the True God, filled with the same wisdom as Sophia, and if we could truly know ourselves, could know exactly who we were, we could walk back through the gates into the Garden of Eden, knowing that we were God, part of a true divine reality bigger than anything Yaldabaoth could understand.

So, too, does Jade Harley, GardenGnostic, in that moment, know that she is bigger than anything that once defined her. Not her grandfather's death and failings, not her role as a link in the prophecies of Skaia, not Jack Noir, and not the limitations of a single Jade in a tragic timeline. None of those things define her. She is greater still, the JADE beyond Jades, and she has just as much power to make SBURB, to make all of Paradox Space what she wants it to be as any would-be tyrant. She stares Lord English in the eye, and knows she is as great within this contest of wills as he is. They all are.

And that makes Jade a little bit different from her fellow gods: she knows in full what the rest of them are only beginning to understand.

When we next see Jade after Act 7, in the Credits sequence, we see her growing plants again after a long time away from her garden, returning to her own personal Eden, and we see her spending time with John, Dave, and Karkat--all the people that she loves.

Knowing who she is, she has escaped all the inertias that once bound her, and is turning reality into what she wants it to be.

In the world of SBURB, that's the way to find a happy ending.

[Next time: Maybe I’ll do that reception of the ending thing I promised last time? Or maybe not? Maybe I’ll be too busy playing Hiveswap? Maybe life is full of infinite delicious possibilities, and we’re all riding this magic train out to the Pleroma together? Who knows, man. Who knows.]

[kenzieam]

Phoenix Rising - Chapter 11 (Eric X OC)

Rating: M (violence/swearing/smut :p)

Genre: General/Drama/Angst

Thanks everyone for the re-blogs and support!!! IT IS SO AWESOME!!!  

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Finally, another chapter…thanks for your patience, I hope you find this chapter worth the wait!

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“Fox-” Eric murmured, his voice husky.

Fox rolled her hips again and purred low in his ear, “yeah, baby?”

“I like your physio sessions way more.” Eric grinned into Fox’s throat as she threw back her head and laughed.

Dropping her head, Fox grew serious again, “me too.”

Eric’s private hospital suite had a large jetted tub and Fox had hit on the idea of ‘hydrotherapy’ to help Eric regain more strength in his muscles. It was really just an excuse to make love in the hot tub, and Fox was pretty sure Eric’s main nurse, Millie, knew exactly what they were up to, but she was pretty Dauntless for an Erudite and hadn’t ratted them out; in fact Fox was actually pretty sure she played interference and kept other staff from walking in on them.

Eric groaned low, his lips brushing Fox’s shoulder-blades. Fox rolled her hips hard and was rewarded with another deep growl vibrating through Eric’s chest, his arms tightening around her. His lips moved to Fox’s throat and he nipped her hard, his hands caressing Fox’s slick breasts before trailing down to her swollen abdomen, the skin stretched tight. Fox’s belly made it easier for her to ride Eric reverse, her back to his chest, but Fox found she loved this position too, for the unparalleled access it gave Eric to caress her new curves. His groans and soft grunts in her ear sent tingles through her body and Fox felt herself getting close. She dropped her head back on Eric’s shoulder and moaned, clenching her inner muscles around him and Eric groaned again, his chest rumbling against Fox’s back.

“Fuck baby,” he mumbled, lips brushing the shell of her ear.

“Eric-” Fox whispered, her voice trembling.

“Let go baby, come for me,” Eric breathed, nipping Fox’s pulse point and Fox exploded, crying out as waves of pleasure overtook her. She felt Eric tense beneath her, then relax and release as well, groaning deeply in her ear, mumbling curses mixed in with her name. His arms banded tight around Fox as he panted in her throat, his chest heaving against her back. After a long, quiet moment Fox, still quivering with aftershocks, finally found the energy to speak. Tipping her head to rest against Eric’s she murmured.

“Nerve sensation getting better?”

Eric answered without lifting his head from the crook of her neck. “Yeah, less pins and needles all the time.”

“Good,” Fox murmured, turning her head more to nuzzle against Eric’s ear. He purred happily and squeezed her a little tighter.

“Your arm control is way better.”

“Your physio is helping,” Eric replied with a grin, tracing Fox’s ear with his tongue. Fox felt him twitch and begin to harden again inside her and she grinned.

“Your stamina is better too.”

“Yeah baby…all you,” Eric breathed. After a long moment he raised his head and groaned. Fox lifted her head and followed his line of sight. She sighed.

“Boring physio time,” Eric muttered, helping Fox to stand, hissing quietly as she pulled free of his cock. Fox quickly exited the bath and wrapped a towel around herself. Dropping another towel on the floor to avoid slips, Fox almost held her arms out to help Eric if he needed it; a few days ago, yes; now, no. Although still weak and unsteady, Eric was stubborn in accepting too much help and, after butting heads with him a few times about it, Fox had given in, waiting nearby instead to help instead. My stubborn ass, my stubborn Dauntless man. ______________________________________________________________________________________________________

Eric startled awake, unsure what had awoken him. The first thing he noticed was that Fox wasn’t curled beside him and he sat up, or tried to sit up. His body wouldn’t respond, his legs gone; strong bands held him down and Eric’s heart began to race. What the- AHHHHHH! White hot pain shot through him, taking his breath away. He couldn’t feel his legs, couldn’t even tell if they were still attached to him and he couldn’t lift his head to check. But the pain, FUCK, the pain!

It felt like rusty barbwire was wrapped around him, pulling and ripping, it felt like his chest had been torn open and red hot coals dumped into the gaping cavity. Rusty teeth gnashed at his spine and ground it to powder. Eric tried to scream and felt a plastic tube in his mouth, blocking his voice, half-choking him. Panic raced coldly through him, his heart threatened to stop in it’s fear. Fox, FOX?!  Baby, where are you ! His mind screamed. Eric felt tears burn his skin. What the fuck is happening to me?! I CAN’T FUCKING MOVE!! FOX!!! Tears of misery and terror clouded his vision, his muscles locked in a agonizing convulsion; everything below his chest was frighteningly numb. Eyes rolling, Eric desperately searched for Fox, his sanity began to slip, stolen by shock and agony; no one could withstand this, cracks appeared in his mind, his brain began to shut down in horror, withdrawing itself for protection from the torture Eric’s body was experiencing-

“Eric?”

Hands grabbed him. A strangled, garbled scream finally loosening from his throat. He could move, his trapped body finally free, he launched himself forward, away from the bed, away from the pain-

“Eric!”

Eric’s eyes snapped open, Fox was inches from him, shouting his name. Eric’s convulsive thrash almost threw her from the bed but Eric instinctively grabbed at her upper arms, yanking her back.

“F-Fox?” He gasped, shuddering. “Fuck, I’m sorry,” he groaned.

“It’s okay, calm down baby,” Fox murmured, leaning forward to press a gentle kiss to his trembling lips. Shaking, Eric locked eyes with Fox, desperate for reassurance. His chest heaved and his hands twitched spasmodically on her arms. Fox rubbed her thumbs in reassuring circles on his deltoid muscles.

“Eric, you’re safe, it was a just a nightmare.”

“A nightmare,” Eric whispered, collapsing bonelessly back onto the bed. Breathing heavily he forced his hands to relax from around Fox’s arms. He’d grabbed her hard, it would surely leave bruises.

Fox stroked Eric’s hair back from his forehead and, with a wince, lay down beside him. Her hand rested over Eric’s heart, feeling it race in his chest. They lay silent for several minutes, until Eric muttered.

“I hurt you…I grabbed you.”

“I’m fine,” Fox traced gentle circles on Eric’s bare chest. “I’ve had nightmares too, I know how bad they get.”

“You’re bruising,” Eric moaned, fingers lightly brushing Fox’s biceps, where dark bruises were already blooming.

Fox trailed her hand up to Eric’s jaw and guided his mouth to hers. He pressed his lips to hers feverishly; sweat shone on his face and his heart finally began to slow. The nurses knew by now to stay away when Eric woke up screaming from a nightmare, Fox was the only one that could get through to him in that state, and he would cling to her afterwards, for hours, until he fell back asleep. Eric hated himself for hurting Fox as he woke up, thrashing and disoriented, but Fox refused to leave, knowing Eric needed her against him to sleep anymore; in truth, Fox couldn’t sleep unless she was in Eric’s arms either.

“Shhh, go back to sleep baby,” Fox soothed as Eric’s tears wet her cheeks and his body shuddered against her. ______________________________________________________________________________________________________

Eric’s mobility increased daily, and so did his cabin fever. He was restless, frustrated and wanted to go home; and Fox couldn’t blame him. Erudite was downright boring compared to Dauntless, no wonder Eric transferred. Fox’s belly grew everyday too, but fortunately Eric now had enough control of his limbs to resume his massages on her lower back. The strange nerve sensations, tingling and numbness were improving, but Eric needed to return almost to his physical peak before going back to Dauntless; the nature of his injuries had been kept secret by Max, and so too much numbness or weakened coordination would invite unwanted gossip and speculation. If too many council or faction members decided that Eric was no longer physically suited to Dauntless, he could lose his leadership position, be exiled or found in the chasm one day, pushed to his death.

Fox’s appointments became weekly affairs, multiples never lasted full-term and with the stress of the last weeks, coupled with Fox’s traumatic miscarriage from before, gave her doctor cause to worry Fox would deliver early, even for twins. Therefore, as per doctor’s orders, Fox reluctantly spent most of her time in bed, or reclined in a chair; while Eric spent less and less time in both, working feverishly to regain his pre-accident fitness level before the babies made their debut. The physiotherapist had given up long ago on trying to regulate Eric, and instead provided suggestions for new exercises and therapies to work on. The nightmares continued, but lessened each night until Eric would only jolt awake beside Fox, breathing hard for awhile before snuggling back down beside her, curling his hand over hers.

Eric was working so hard, and was so focused on his goal that Fox was reluctant to complain about the increasing level of discomfort she felt. Eric’s boys were rambunctious, one more so than the other, and they fought each other and moved constantly. Fox’s cramps had returned, and while she’d told the doctor, she didn’t tell Eric; reasoning that he had enough to worry about. The doctor was concerned enough to warn Fox to contact him if the pain got worse, and stressed bed rest. The only relief she felt was with Eric, when he massaged her back with skillful fingers; when he pulled her against him, hands roaming over her body, lips caressing her throat, entering her slowly and groaning in her ear.

Finally, finally, the day came that Eric was recovered enough to return home. Erudite lacked the training areas of Dauntless, and so Eric could only go so far here. To see Eric walking around, sitting or standing, you wouldn’t believe that just weeks ago he had been near death, comatose and a quadriplegic; only if he tried to spar, or run, exercise or train did it become obvious that Eric wasn’t 100%. Max arranged for private training sessions with Four and Will to help Eric, they were easy enough to explain away as being needed for the broken legs Eric had suffered, not the broken back. It was hard to decide who was more exited to go home, Eric was typically closed-mouth to everyone but Fox about his true feelings, and Fox, although excited, was also apprehensive. They were leaving the hospital, what if Eric’s weakness returned, what if being back in the warrior faction made Eric push himself too hard and he re-injured himself? What if the twins came early?

Eric noticed Fox’s anxiety, and pulled her to him. “What’s wrong, aren’t you happy we’re going home?”

“Just worried,” Fox mumbled. Eric tilted up her chin and pressed a warm kiss to her lips. Resting his forehead to hers he asked softly.

“About the babies, or me?”

“Both….that you’ll get hurt again….and that the twins will come early, there’ll be problems-”

Eric clicked his tongue,“ I think we’ve had enough problems, surely the universe is going to give us a break?” His tone was light even though his eyes were concerned and Fox exhaled, pushing her worries down. Dauntless didn’t worry, they attacked their fears. She lifted her head and smiled.

“Ready to go?”

“Fuck yeah.” Eric grinned, grabbing his duffel bag.

Max had sent a truck to pick them up and bring them home. Eric and Fox sat in the backseat, Eric gazing contemplatively out the window while Fox drowsed on his shoulder. A particularly hard kick made her jump, but Fox was so used to it by now she remained sleeping. Eric rested his hand tenderly against her stomach and murmured to his babies.

“You two give your mama a break. She needs to sleep.” He smiled when a small push answered him.

Too soon, they arrived. Part of Eric wished the trip had taken longer, he hadn’t missed Fox’s broken sleep these last few days, and his constant nightmares hadn’t helped either, she’s seemed to really relax in the truck just now; but part of Eric was itching to go home. A smaller but vocal part of him, a part he refused to acknowledge, shared Fox’s anxiety about re-injury, but Eric stubbornly ignored it. There was no fanfare when they arrived, Four met them and quietly escorted them to their apartment. Eric insisted Fox have a nap while he and Four checked out the apartment they’d been assigned on the family side, and she fell into bed almost instantly.

“She’s exhausted,” Four noted mildly as they walked shoulder to shoulder down the corridor.

“She worries,” Eric mumbled.

“You did give us a hell of a scare man. For awhile I thought Fox was going to be a widow.”

Eric shuddered, he thought about that enough, didn’t need to be reminded of it.

The apartment they’d been assigned was spacious but minimally furnished, as was the Dauntless way. Eric, Four and Will would move all their belongings over tomorrow while Fox relaxed with Tris and Christina and, barring any problems, Eric and Fox would be sleeping in their new apartment by tomorrow night. Cribs were already set up in the nursery and the walls were painted Dauntless grey.

Fox was still asleep when Eric returned later, and he curled against her with a contented sigh, resting his hand on her belly, where one of the twins pushed gently back. ______________________________________________________________________________________________________

Fox groaned low in discomfort and rose to her feet to walk around. They had been home for awhile now, and the twins were due in seven weeks. Fox knew they wouldn’t stay in there that long, and was immensely relieved. She was stuck mostly in the apartment now, ordered by both the doctor and Eric to ‘take it easy’ and she was bored to tears.

Eric had returned to work, only to get buried under a mountain of paperwork, and trained regularly with Four, Will, Uriah and Zeke in the evenings to get back in fighting trim. He still experienced strange pins and needles, but they were infrequent and short-lived; Fox could tell when an episode hit him, he would absently shake his hand, or hit at his thigh to scatter the numbness, flexing his fingers or bending his knee back and forth until the sensation left. He wasn’t home nearly as often as he or Fox wanted, but Eric was determined to prove that he was still one of Dauntless’ top leaders. He would pull Fox to him as soon as he walked through the door every night, and Fox would shriek and demand he shower first, since he’d usually come from a training session and was dripping in sweat.

Fox had set the nursery to rights, and had stacks of clothes washed and ready for the twins. The double cribs came with double rocking chairs and Fox had caught Eric rocking in one of the chairs a few nights ago, a wistful smile on his face. She moved to these clothes now, there was a small pile that still needed to be folded and put away. Fox held up the first article, a tiny black onesie with 'Daddy’s little Warrior’ printed on the front and smirked. Her baby shower had been held a few days ago, and she’d been buried in gifts for the boys. They were now well-stocked in absolutely anything a baby might need and Fox had laughed out loud at Eric’s face when he and Four had crashed the shower near the end and he’d seen the stack of opened gifts at Fox’s side.

Setting the folded onesie down, Fox picked up a second, then felt a curious trickle. She glanced down, mouth opening in shock as a gush of liquid flowed over her feet, splashing onto the floor. Fox’s heart began to pound, her water had just broken, the twins were coming, and it was too soon.

[deadskepticfiles]

THE DREAMING PROPHET TRANSCRIPT: Ep 6, Mission Possible

PODOMATIC LINK

Welcome to the club! You're joining at an exciting time, but you're going to need to hit the ground running. The good news is, we're all happy to help you learn the ropes, and which ropes to skip.

Talking points: A correction on Episode 5; All missions, all the time.

Featuring cohost, Be11amy. Spoiler + Content warning begins at 1:07.

Content warnings: General horror, death + injury to children.

Eric Switzer's article on The Gamer: https://www.thegamer.com/blackout-club-lore-explained/ (+ The Gamer's review of The Blackout Club: https://www.thegamer.com/the-blackout-club-review/)

The Blackout Club Lexicon, for player/game lingo & terminology [on Google Docs]: bit.ly/TBCLexicon

Credits:

- lavanya: host, transcript, video editor, asset artist, speak-as-one's #1 fan

- astriferal: host, audio editor, puncher of things

- be11amy: host, advertising, fact-checking

- xaviul: moral support

- intro & outro music, "ringing bells": a weirdly handsome individual

- transition audio clips, music, voice lines: the blackout club/question games

- spooky ambiance: KRISTIANKULTA on freesound (https://freesound.org/people/KRISTIANKULTA/sounds/326962/)

- weird ambiance: Magmi Soundtracks on freesound (https://freesound.org/people/Magmi.Soundtracks/sounds/475737/)

- creepy sounds: JOHNWALLY on freesound (https://freesound.org/people/JOHNWALLY/sounds/32805/)

- the blackout club: question games (https://www.blackoutclubgame.com) 

ASTRO: Hello, dear listeners, and welcome to the Dreaming Prophet. The sky is bright. The sun is shining and the birds are singing.

 ASTRO: Or are they? Those aren't birds. Oh God, those aren't birds at all. Wake up! Dear listener, wake up, before the sheep comes back.

 LAVANYA: That's my line. Well! My name is Lavanya and I'm your host for tonight along with this thieving thief of a bastard.

 ASTRO: Hi, I'm Astro.

 BELLAMY: And I'll be joining you for the first time today. You may or may not recognize my voice, but my name is Bellamy Bell for short.

 ASTRO: This is a Blackout Club show for Blackout Club players with minimal speculation, all lore, and a focus on the known facts. Our topic of the day is the missions. We'll be giving you a guide on the basics of missions, and all the things we've learned while playing them.

 LAVANYA: So, our spoiler warnings for today are pretty much none. There are no spoilers unless you are deeply invested in the lore of the missions, in which case, there are a lot of spoilers. So, you have a general horror warning as always, and emphasis on the death, plus injury to children warning that we always do. Because this will be explicitly talking about the missions that do include dead children!

 BELLAMY: B-b-b-breaking news, listeners, we have exciting news for you today!

 LAVANYA: And that is we have received an official correction on our last episode episode 5, A Light In The Darkness, about everyone's least favorite morally grey Daimon Thee-I-Dare. So this correction came from the developers and clarified a point of slight confusion in the podcast specifically about the word in the song.

 LAVANYA: This is the statement that we received:.

 LAVANYA: Word and Song can exist in the same mind without turning instantly lethal. In fact, most minds in Redacre are burdened by both. But the pure expression of the Old Tongue, while *conscious* - has led to madness or death in the rare cases it has happened. Over prolonged periods, even Sleepers who have been induced to peform it have been lost to it, because under the surface, their brains were still organized by the Word, so a corrosive cognitive dissonance builds up if they try to perform a long, complex thought in it.

 LAVANYA: So, to clarify that further, basically what that quote is saying is that the Word in the Song being present in an individual's head does not instantly kill you! It is not an instant game over. Instead, the Word is present in every individual's heads, and Red Acre residents are largely burdened by the song already, which can heard at any point, if you turn down your sound effects or raise your music in-game.

 ASTRO: We are planning a full corrections episode later so you can watch for that. But for now that's the facts.

 BELLAMY: For this episode, however, our main goal is to provide comprehensive info, and some tips and tricks about the missions that currently exist in a game. We'll be going over each mission, individually outlining what's required for the mission, and some tips that we have for you.

 BELLAMY: As a general tip before we start, please remember that if you're ever confused while you're playing, you can always close your eyes, and you should actually see footsteps leading you to the next step of your mission.

 ASTRO: So, in game, there are three mission types. They are search, steal, and disrupt. After a certain level, the missions are randomized. But your first few missions will mostly be the same.

 BELLAMY: So, our first search type mission is the one titled INVESTIGATE: BREAK IN. Break in the purpose of this mission. As it's explained to you in game is that there's been a strange break in at one of the Red Acre houses and you've been tasked by your club members with sneaking over there and recording anything strange that you find there are actually two variants on this mission. The regular variant that you will see for most of your time playing the game and the variant that you actually get the very first time that you play any mission.

 BELLAMY: This one, we'll be calling the NIGHT ONE VARIANT.

 BELLAMY: So, the Night One variant takes advantage of the fact that investigating a break in is one of the simpler Missions you can receive. So, it's used as a pretty good introduction for certain game mechanics, and it will prompt to you regarding how to record evidence in the game when you're first learning.

 BELLAMY: The main difference between the Night One variant, and the regular version of this mission, is just the introductory flavor text that you see when you load into the mission, rather than in the actual gameplay.

 BELLAMY: The Night One break investigation is a fun one, because it provides you with a lot of inner universe fictional details as to what's going on and additional explanations as to what to do now.

 BELLAMY: What you actually do for both variants of this mission is that you need to sneak into a house, and record three strange things that have happened in the house.

 BELLAMY: These can range from a smashed in front door, to dirty footsteps in the living room, even to strange and unnervingly red stains splattered across the bathroom sink. Remember, like we mentioned earlier, these pieces of evidence can be scattered around the house.

 BELLAMY: So, like we mentioned earlier, if you get lost or can't find one, you can always close your eyes and there should be a trail of footsteps leading you to the next piece of evidence. This may even help you identify evidence that you didn't realize was evidence in the first place.

 BELLAMY: A dirt smear to your open eyes may manifest as a glowing footprints one burned into the backs of your eyelids. And when it comes to outside evidence the trail will unfortunately not lead you directly to it. But it will lead you to outside in general which should be your clue to look around the small outside area such as the backyard in which you've ended up. The evidence should be nearby.

 ASTRO: The second "search" type mission that we'll be covering is find a club members phone. The purpose of this mission is to get sensitive information out of the cults hands. Three chests in the maze are locked. Only one has the phone. It's a guessing game, and it helps to have lock picks, although you can kick in chests. It creates a lot of noise and it creates a lot of sin. And in this case, unlike kicking indoors, foam canisters will not save you. There is no way to foam an item chest and kick it open at this time.

 BELLAMY: Now, our next mission category is DISRUPT.

 BELLAMY: The first mission in this category is the dual pick up posters, and place recruitment posters mission. There are actually two variants on this mission as well. There is the House posters variant, and The Maze posters variant. First, we'll be talking about the House posters version as it's the slightly easiest one and it comes up a little bit earlier for most players. The purpose of this mission is to recruit new club members by pasting invisible propaganda all around town.

 BELLAMY: Now, the first step of this mission is "PICK UP POSTERS", of which, eponymously, involves picking up some posters from trash cans or bins around town.

 BELLAMY: When you collect these posters, try to split up who has how many posters, or else you will end up with one proactive member of your team picking up all of themm advancing the mission to the next stepm and leaving no posters for the rest of your group to pick up!

 BELLAMY: A recent update actually allows you to drop quest items for your teammates, so it's not the end of the world if you grab all the items yourself, but it does take a little more work to distribute the quest items that way.

 BELLAMY: And step two of the mission, you place the recruitment posters! For the House posters variant of this mission, you generally put them up on houses and trees. This is pretty easy because posters are absolutely silent to put up. They just take a second, and as long as there's nobody around that can see you, you should be absolutely fine.

 BELLAMY: Now the Maze posters variant of this mission is a little bit tougher. This is essentially the same mission as putting the posters up above ground, but it's more dangerous, because your mission goal is to wake up adults instead of convert children. So you'll be doing the most of your work underground in the maze.

 BELLAMY: Aside from that, the mission details are about the same!

 BELLAMY: You pick up posters and put them up in the maze and, you know, pray that you don't get dragged, kicking and screaming, into the bowels of the Song's terrible underground machine, never to be heard from again.

 BELLAMY: And lastly, regarding both of these mission variants, when you put up those posters, you know ,they do look like regular posters if occasionally rather meme. So if you're wondering how they help recruit the club, or disrupt the adults wandering the Maze, well, just try taking a look at them with your eyes closed.

 ASTRO: The next DISRUPT mission is picking up the yard signs and planting the yard signs. The purpose is to recruit for the club! No need to go into the maze this time. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, will begin when you retrieved boxes from inside two houses, which have all of the yard signs inside.

 ASTRO: Like with posters, it's important to split up who has how many yard signs.

 ASTRO: Hammer them into the ground without getting caught. The hammering process takes time: a couple of seconds. You should plan for this. Unlike with the posters, enemies will hear you and will come to your location to investigate, and if they can see you, it's even worse if someone interrupts you while you are placing a yard sign. You will have to start all over from the beginning of the process.

 LAVANYA: The third DISRUPT type of mission is "Foam Party".

 LAVANYA: Foam Party is pretty exciting because this is a pretty active mission. All things considered, if you're heading out into the streets, getting ready to strike directly back against the cult that is trying to murder, brainwash, or possibly just going by some of their call lines, *nag* you back into serving them.

 LAVANYA: So, what you'll be doing in this mission is - you'll be picking up phone canisters at the Maze's entrance. You need at least 10 for it to start into the next part of the mission, but you can gather pretty much a shit ton more, if you feel like just roaming around the level.

 [00:09:09] You will take these foam canisters and you will damage the cult technology. Don't be like me. I literally spent three months, until Xaviul was kind enough to tell me to read the fucking mission, thinking that I was supposed to be disabling the proximity mines. No. You want to disable the mines that electrocute you.

 [00:09:27] So, this is a normal variant. You formally deactivate every speed trap aboveground. There will be 10 total!

 LAVANYA: There is a second variant, which is the Maze Foam Party, which is foaming or deactivating every speed mine underground. There are still 10! The only difference is the location.

 LAVANYA: The maze is more dangerous, and because the maze is fuck-huge, it will take you a great deal longer.

 ASTRO: The fourth DISRUPT type mission is titled "Get the Dampeners". The purpose of this mission is to disrupt the instrument, which keeps track of the player's sins and alerts the Shape.

 ASTRO: The dampers are wooden cases that have been stuffed with pieces of blankets crafted by the kids. Handmade, and each one is perfectly formed to fit onto one string. The soft material will stop the strings from vibrating quite so fiercely, and it will change the sound of the instrument.

 ASTRO: To complete this mission, your first task is to pick up dampers. Collectively, you only need to pick up four, but there are 12 scattered around the map. You will need to put these dampers on four different strings in the maze. They can be anywhere in the maze, in any room, and you may need to change the way you're positioned in order to reach certain places.

 ASTRO: Completing this mission wipes away your sin up to that point, and will often cause the Shape to stop targeting players. If he doesn't go away immediately, he will soon. Sometimes, he just needs to shape someone before he goes. You know, it's his job.

 ASTRO: He wants to feel fulfilled.

 BELLAMY: Our last disruption oriented mission involves audio bugs. The purpose of this mission is to give kids a way to listen in on the adults. After all, we do have plenty of adults trying to snoop in on what the kids of Red Acre are doing, so it's about time that we get a chance to turn the tables on parental controls, and hopefully get some warning ahead of time if there is anything particularly nefarious getting plotted.

 BELLAMY: To get your equipment for this mission, you'll be nabbing one of four boxes located on a delivery bike somewhere outside and above ground in town. These will be your audio bugs. You then take these listening devices and, ironically, very very quietly sneak into the targeted houses to install them in specific locations that the mission will point out to you. The caveat here is that the installation process for the bugs makes a lot of noise, so you want to make sure you'll be safe before starting installation.

 BELLAMY: There's actually a couple of different tactics you can use for this!

 BELLAMY: Firstly, you can scout the house first and tag the Resident Evil resident sleepers. Well, you know what I mean. Secondly, or if you're daring, even alternatively, you can have an escape plan ready to open a window nearby and get ready to book it across the rooftops before you get bodily tackled and sent off to the world's worst overnight camp.

 ASTRO: More on this after a word from our sponsors.

We interrupt your regularly scheduled commercial break with a public service announcement.

Here in Red Acre, we are a lovely and close-knit community. However, we can at times feel slightly detached from the rest of the world. As a result, it is important to keep an eye out for our most vulnerable population: Our children.

Feelings of isolation, distant behavior, and even beginning to speak to “imaginary friends” can be signs that your loved ones need help.

CHORUS provides free counseling for any children experiencing symptoms like these.

Please, don’t hesitate to make the call to help your loved ones today.

BELLAMY: Our third mission type is STEAL. Because who doesn't love a good bit of petty theft, after all? Doesn't that stuff get wiped off your juvenile record?

 ASTRO: I hope so.

 BELLAMY: Now. Our first mission is pickpocketing evidence bags, because, you know, who doesn't want to pretend they're in Skyrim? The purpose of this mission is damage control. A previous Blackout Club mission went awry, and some chorus agent is carrying the evidence. You're here to retrieve it.

 BELLAMY: Your goal in this mission is to retrieve the bag of Blackout Club evidence that a chorus agent is carrying. It's perfectly possible, and in fact, ideal to do this without ever alerting them to your presence.

 BELLAMY: If you dot get noticed, however, you can still freely complete the mission. You'll just have to run very very quickly!

 BELLAMY: There are actually two variants of this mission as well. The first variant is Sleepers Elite. This is the low level version that you'll get on levels 2 and 3 or so, where the chorus agent carrying your bag of evidence is an elite sleeper.

 BELLAMY: This version is on the easier side, as sleepers are blind and will be unable to see you approach. Make sure to stay totally silent!

 BELLAMY: Secondly, there's the regular version of this mission that you get once you're at higher levels in this variant. The evidence bag is being carried by a lucid dreamer. Even worse, the lucid is almost always down in the underground maze. You'll have to dive down and face the nightmare underground to the best of your clandestine abilities.

 BELLAMY: Do your best to snatch the key evidence of your club's doings from a fully cognizant agent that can, and unless you're a master of stealth, probably will see you.

 BELLAMY: Getting the bag from a lucid dreamer without being seen is pretty difficult. So, my best advice for this mission of area is to pack a candy bar for a swift escape and have your exit route in mind ahead of time.

 ASTRO: The second seal type mission you'll encounter is "Carry the Torch!" The purpose of this mission is to retrieve cult tech and bring it home to study at the boxcar. Your objective is to get into the maze, retrieve an item called the First Fire, and carry it out of the maze and to the drop point without being apprehended.

 ASTRO: If you lose the fire, another one will spawn on the table - but try not to lose it. The First Fire makes you highly visible to Lucids and the Shape. There is no off switch on this thing,and it glows brightly in a large radius around you. And lucids, as we all know, have perfect 2020 vision.

 ASTRO: Really, the only hot tip about this mission is to take it and fucking go. There is nothing you can do to make this mission better for yourself. You can try to weave around corners, but that's about it. The faster you get it over with, the more grateful you'll be when it's done. If you should run into trouble while carrying the fire, pass the baton to a teammate! It is Baton shaped, after all.

 ASTRO: You can call it a relay race, whatever makes you happy - but ultimately, the Blackout Club is a co-op game, and your teammates are there to support you.

 LAVANYA: All right. So, now that we're done talking about stealing precious religious artifacts from innocent worshippers, just trying to live their own life, we are moving on to a different kind of mission!

 LAVANYA: In which we are returning what may, or may not be, a priceless religious artifact.

 LAVANYA: Because we're good people.

 BELLAMY: And, to be clear in my opinion, which is otherwise known as categorically, this is the absolute worst and most difficult mission in the game, especially if you have to do it solo.

 LAVANYA: Yes, see, that's wrong, but that's OK, because this is not the Song, and we do accept controversial and incorrect statements.

 LAVANYA: This mission is called "TO CARRY A TUNE". It's one of the most interesting missions, in my opinion, in that we do get explicit lore with it. The screaming head is essentially -.

 LAVANYA: Well, I guess, you could say that is not screaming, but if you look in your heart, it really is screaming -.

 LAVANYA: The screaming head is actually releasing part of what the game refers to as the "Sleepwalker Song." You can kind of reach the conclusion that it is actually transmitting part of the Song above ground, which is fascinating!

 LAVANYA: Our goal with this mission is to take it back underground. You take it off with an electric stand that they've usually set up by one of the house's - sometimes in the road - and then you take it back underground to a randomized location in the maze. It screams whenever you move. It attracts attention and it accumulates a fuck ton of sin.

 LAVANYA: So the best method in which to handle this mission is, If you do not have unstoppable, you can actually throw the head. In early access, there was sometimes an issue where the head would become stuck if you did this. This is less of an issue now, but if it does become stuck then you can just go ahead and get a new one.

 LAVANYA: Throwing the head gives you a certain amount of leeway. For example, if you're standing an instrument supply and you throw your head through the hole that leads to String Relay -

 LAVANYA: You can make that throw. You may not make that throw, and you may regret everything, but you can make it, and the only way that you can guarantee that you'll make it is to try and try again.

 ASTRO: And truly yeet the thing.

 ASTRO: So, now that we've gotten through all of that, you may have noticed that we left out a few key missions. This is because we've categorized these missions as multipart missions.

 ASTRO: These missions require a different kind of thinking and a different approach.

 LAVANYA: The first of multi multipart missions is the Cryptograms. This is a real tight mission. Basically, the point of it is that the player characters discover that CHORUS is researching something interesting down in the maze in the Cryptogram Library, one of the largest rooms. What they are researching functionally appears to either be a very fucked up type of yoga, or else incredibly tepid dance moves.

 LAVANYA: So, it's up for grabs on how hateful your feeling towards the cult on what decision you make here.

 BELLAMY: Spoiler: it should probably be pretty hateful.

 LAVANYA: Don't insult my religious background, Bellamy!

 BELLAMY: Religious background suggests that you follow some sort of moral code, and I'm not sure that Simon says "OBEY" qualifies.

 LAVANYA: As was confirmed by Speak-as-One themself, who does dictate a beautiful and extensive moral code to their followers, so go fuck yourself - the cryptograms are actually written forms of the Old Tongue.

 LAVANYA: As we've mentioned before briefly, the Old Tongue is the original language of the Daimons. It cannot safely be spoken or used by humans, but, for whatever reason, Speak-as-One is just - you know - collecting information on endless cryptograms for them to stare at, I suppose.

 ASTRO: When you spend half your life in a place as dreary as the Maze, I suppose anything will spice it up.

 LAVANYA: The way this mission goes is that you will find the cryptograms in a random room in the Maze. This can be Dream Therapy, this can be Sleepers Lockers, this can be Cryptogram Library. Basically, the range of rooms that the crypto gamescryptograms can spawn in is pretty fucking far ranging.

 LAVANYA: All three of them, however, will always be in the same room. The only exception to this is the Somniloqs, because technically, those aren't the same room they're just on opposite sides just like this.

 LAVANYA: Once you get those, the mission can change slightly depending on what level you are. For low level characters, grabbing the cryptograms sometimes is all that you need to do, but as you gain levels in the game, you'll discover that the mission grows with you. Once you reach a higher level, the game will spawn a projector as the second part of the cryptographic mission.

 LAVANYA: The rest of the mission is functionally the same, but you will now have additional objectives. You will get to put them into the projector, and record the slides that show up, and then escape from the mob that you've probably attracted around you - because when you film their projector, it will make noise.

 LAVANYA: This will attract enemies and as with anything that causes that, it will attract the Shape.

 ASTRO: Our next multipart mission begins with HIDE EVIDENCE.

 ASTRO: We referred to this colloquially as the bird mission. It's a search type mission, and the purpose is to protect fellow club kids who are doing weird shit while they're possessed. Your task is to go to a specific house! Inside this house is a cutting board that has been desiccated with the blood and feathers of a dove.

 ASTRO: Upon finding it, though, you will realize that the dove itself is missing. You will have to follow a trail of four to five bloodstains between the cutting board and the bird's corpse in another house or another location. Cleaning these bloodstains makes a lot of noise, but each one is bonus evidence. So, if you want a top tier clear, it's a good idea to pick up some kitchen cleaner on your way.

 ASTRO: Our third multipart mission is the drone retrieval mission. Like the crypotograms, this is a steal type mission and in this case your club mate, Dax, has tried to steal some of the chorus codes documents by means of a drone. He was ultimately successful, but unfortunately, it's malfunctioned and dropped all of his ill gotten gains across town.

 BELLAMY: Now it's up to you to do recovery, and this mission, you will be hunting around for a few things. First, you must search for and repair the crashed drone itself. It will often be found in a place that requires some climbing to get to, like a rooftop. When you find the drone, you need to initiate a slightly time consuming and loud repair, so be ready to run, or make sure there's nobody around it before you start.

 BELLAMY: After you have the drone repaired, it will begin to fly and retrace its previously malfunctioning flight path.

 ASTRO: At the time of its initial malfunction, it dropped several bonus papers and the all important chorus binder and you need to follow it to find and pick up all of the missing items. This part is pretty easy though: the papers can end up just about anywhere aboveground. On outside rooftops, the middle of the street, you name it.

 BELLAMY: Watch out for adults and you should be fine.

 ASTRO: The next multipart mission we've decided to call: "Find the Kid." There are three variants to this mission, and they change the objectives drastically. However, overall, this is a search type mission. The purpose is to rescue fellow club members.

 ASTRO: The first variant of this mission is called "Untie the Kid". You will follow the marker to your objective underground. There will be a kid tied up in the maze. You have to untie this kid, as the name of the mission suggests. But after that, they can get themselves out just fine. Everyone in the club is very capable.

 BELLAMY: The second vary on this mission is pretty similar to the first, with one very jarring difference. Now, you get told in this mission to find the missing person - in this mission, you follow the marker to your objective. But unlike in the last version, when you find your friend, they're already dead. Your job in this mission is to record the evidence and leave as quickly as you can.

 ASTRO: The last variant of this mission is called "Follow the Trail", and it combines elements from both previous variance. Your mission object marker will take you to the start point of a trail.

 ASTRO: At this location begins a trail of blood, which eventually leads down into the maze at the head of the trail. There are usually about three to four pieces of bonus evidence. The exception to this is Old Growth, at this time of recording. You will follow the trail of blood into the maze, wherever it leads, and at the end, you will either find one of your friends alive -.

 ASTRO: - or one of your friends that you will dearly miss.

 LAVANYA: So, something that's interesting to note here is that the game explicitly says that the lucid do not want to hurt the player characters in the guide that serves as the access to the tutorial.

 LAVANYA: However, in the first part of the mission, when you are just looking to untie your kidnapped friends, it states that they are being interrogated, which is bad.

 LAVANYA: In the "Find the Missing Person" mission, it states that "you just hope that you're in time: free them if so, record the crime if not.".

 LAVANYA: Then, in the final part of the mission, where you are finding a dead child - you're dealing with a dead child. What we can get from this is that the Lucids may not want to hurt the player characters, but when they're interrogating them somehow, this interrogation does involve of risk enough of death that the Blackout Club children are heavily invested in reaching their friends in time - and when they can't reach their friends in time, it's shown that their concern is not hyperbolic, because that's when they're discovering that their friends have been killed.

 LAVANYA: So, our next mission is the recording mission, which is a steal type mission - not actually a Pokemon reference.

 LAVANYA: To backtrack slightly towards a previous topic, what's fascinating about the recording mission is that this is the first example of the Old Tongue that we see directly in play. This mission involves the children gathering some sort of electric boxes, placing them around a circle that they draw with chalk, and activating something on the boxes. When they do so, the symbol that they've drawn lights up and when they lure the sleeper - or Lucid - inside of it, they are trapped.

 LAVANYA: They begin performing a symbol endlessly.

 LAVANYA: What this mission is is that you set up the devices around the symbol and you lure an enemy within it - either lucid or sleepers, it doesn't really matter.

 BELLAMY: It doesn't work in the Shape, but it has no sense of dance moves anyways, so that's OK.

 LAVANYA: Once you get them inside, they will begin performing the gesture "CHASE THE SUN" endlessly on repeat until they are interrupted. As the sidebar notes, if you read it during the mission, sometimes the sleepers perform these even to the point of dying. The mission insinuates that this is the Old Tongue - but a conversation with Speak-as-One actually confirmed it. If you do not tackle the enemy after recording, they will remain kneeling for the rest of the game.

 ASTRO: Extended tasks can be assisted. Examples are not limited to fixing the drone, cleaning blood and untying the kid - multiple people working on one extended task will help it go faster significantly.

 ASTRO: Friendship is, again, the core of the Blackout Club. Without it, you get into a lot more trouble.

 BELLAMY: Some additional notes and game etiquette that I alluded to earlier include trying to leave someone objectives for your teammates, if they want them. Most people do like to help, and they got the game because they wanted to play it - not because they wanted to watch other people play it. Communication is key, and this will also mean that you can finish the game faster, like we mentioned for missions such as the posters and yard signs.

 BELLAMY: It also helps spread sin out a little bit more, so no player will get shaped immediately. And, like I mentioned earlier, the latest update allows you to drop quest items if you're ever in trouble. Take advantage of this, especially for items that attract a lot of attention or might have you spread out all around the map to complete your objectives.

 BELLAMY: There may be more mission types in the future. If so, we'll try to make a follow up to this guide. But for now, this has been a guide to all of the missions currently in the Blackout Club.

 ASTRO: Thank you to Eric Switzer from the gamer who gave us a shout out in one of his recent articles in the description for this episode.

 ASTRO: We're leaving a link to his article entitled: "OK, What the hell is going on in the Blackout Club?" It's a great read, especially if you're new to the game, and it will introduce you to the bare basics of the lore, and also tell you how you can get more of it.

 ASTRO: As a reminder, if you are new to the game, we have another resource to help you - which is our Blackout Club lexicon. That's a bit dot l y forward slash. Capitalized lexicon with the first letter capitalized. That link should be in our podcast description, and in every episode description, so take a look at it. It's a guide to player and game lingo to help you get acclimated.

 LAVANYA: And before we go, Astro almost forgot the most important mission of all!

 LAVANYA: The newest mission, just recently released by the development team, on the public test server, which is the steal type mission called "Recover the Shape Body Pillow --".  

 ASTRO: Lavanya, I love you, but I was trying to forget.

 LAVANYA: You can never forget in the Song. You're welcome.

ASTRO:

Blackout Club is made by Question Games.

 Our advertising director and host is Bellamy.

 Our transcript and video is by Lavanya.

 Audio editing is by me, Astro.

 Xaviul was buried in Grant's tomb.