#speaking of sleep. i need to go do that!!

[wileys-russo]

Hi , (Leah , apartment, "You set the kitchen on fire?!Just a little, but it means we can start the remodelling sooner, right?)

part of the milaverse remodel II l.williamson

you didn't think much of it when you were stuck at the red light and a fire engine came flying past, cars all screaming to a halt to let them through, humming along to the radio.

you'd just come from a full day of media commitments, starting at 5am with a morning radio interview and ending around 5pm with a photo shoot you were almost certain would require some serious photoshop for the bags under your eyes.

so 12 hours later, utterly exhausted and almost home, you couldn't wait to just curl up with your wife and your daughter. with nothing to do tomorrow at all you'd promised mila a family day you'd cautiously left to leah to plan, hinting heavily if it involved a sleep in and breakfast in bed you'd make it worth your wifes while.

however, every single thought was emptied from your head and replaced with the screaming of alarm bells as you turned the corner onto your street and saw the fire engine again, only this time parked right out the front of your home.

you cleared the gap in record time grateful there didn't seem to be another car on the road and you barely threw it into park before you leapt out, leaving the engine going and the keys in as you pushed your way past neighbours and onlookers without a word.

you heard a few of them call out your name but it fell on deaf ears, shrugging away the hands that poked at you until you were at the front, a tiny amount of relief flooding you as you spotted the back of your wifes head.

leah almost hit the ground as your body hurtled into hers, scowl set and mouth ready to let whoever had just shoved her have it until she realised it was you, your smaller frame wrapping tightly around hers.

"hey hey hey, stop. breathe." you rambled off a million questions a minute as several firefighters came strolling out the front door also unharmed, leahs hand coming to rest over your mouth.

"mila is fine, she's at my mums house for the night, she wasn't even in the neighbourhood when it went up." leah spoke firmly as your eyebrows shot up and you wrenched her hand off you. "when what went up leah? what the fuck happened!" you shoved at your wifes chest, anger masking the fear that was still set deep in your bones.

"thanks mate." leah smiled politely over your shoulder as one of your neighbours handed her the keys you'd left running in the car, advising he'd turned it off and locked it before ushering his own wife away, two police offers having arrived now to disperse the rest of the crowd.

"god this is going to be all over the news tonight." the blonde shuddered at the thought, quickly brought back to reality as you smacked her arm and she whined. "ow!" the defender rubbed her shoulder as you glared at her.

"what. the fuck. happened, leah?" you growled, interrupted yet again before she could answer as the captain of the fire department tapped your wifes shoulder. "you got very lucky. the blaze was contained quite easily and really its only caused damage to the one room-" you tuned him out at that, ducking away and marching off toward the house.

"thank you so much sir. really. its been a valuable lesson learned! i promise this will never happen again." leah rushed out, shaking the mans hand and standing up on tippy toes to catch the back of your head storming toward the front door.

"that the wife?" the man glanced behind him with a small chuckle as leah nodded frantically. "we'll make sure the rest of these lot clear off, and the police shouldn't need to speak to you, i'm happy to rule it an accident. good luck!" the man smiled, leah shaking his hand once again and racing off after you.

"leah. move." you warned sternly as your wife appeared in front of you right as you'd stepped through the door. "babe. now, before you take another step-" the blonde started as you scoffed, shoving past her as she winced and hurried after you.

"look love its not that-" but your jaw dropped, mouth wide open in a state of stunned shock, not a single word of leahs registered as you froze in the doorway, eyes scanning what you were sure used to be your kitchen.

"you-you-this-our-" you stammered out, hands flailing around wildly as leah rubbed the back of her neck with a grimace. "yeahh..." your wife whistled, able to take in all the damage properly herself now, though the chief hadn't been lying when he said she was lucky it was only the one room, the living room mainly untouched.

"you set the kitchen on fire!?" you rounded on her sharply, leah quickly backing up as you advanced until she backed into the fridge with a stumble. "a little?" your wife laughed nervously, your right eye twitching and leahs own gaze darted out to where the knives were, contemplating for a moment if she should move them out of your reach.

"but hey you hated that splash back! and with the insurance money it means we can start remodelling sooner, right?" she perked up hopefully as your mouth opened and closed, not even sure how to respond to that.

"how leah. how did this happen?" you spun back around away from her, eyes scanning the scorned and blackened walls in front of you as leah exhaled a small sigh of relief, subtly side stepping and pushing the knife block back out of sight.

"well. i knew you'd had a full on day and you'd be exhausted, so i organised with mum to take trouble for the night and i thought i'd make dinner-" you scoffed at that, the blonde shooting you a look.

"which i did!" she shooed you out of the way and pulled the fridge, which was mostly unscatched given it was on the other side of the room from the blaze, showing an oven dish of some sort covered over with foil.

"but then i tried making crème brûlée because i know thats your favorite, and i borrowed a blow torch-" leah started as your jaw dropped again and you shook your head in disbelief.

"you borrowed a blow torch!?" you spat out with wide eyes. "a cooking one!" leah tried to defend as you gave her a look. "i was just trying to see if it worked because i was going to finish them off once we'd had dinner and well..." the blonde guiltily gestured around as you exhaled shakily.

"i just-" you could only shake your head, staring at the damage as suddenly a million and one scenarios of how this could have ended very very differently came hurtling to the surface of your mind.

your wife grunted as suddenly you turned and rammed into her, face pressing into her neck and hugging her tightly as leah tensed up in surprised before quickly embracing you.

"i was so scared leah. i just saw the fire engine and-" you trailed off, body trembling in the blondes hold who gently shushed you. "i know love. i know. but i'm safe, mila is safe, you're safe, we're all okay." leah whispered softly, hand rubbing up and down your back as the two of you stood there hugging in silence, your wife not daring to even move until you did.

eventually your death grip on the blonde lessened a little, a few kisses pressed against your lips as your wife repeatedly assured everything was going to be okay but she knew it would take more than words and some time before you believed her.

"i'll call mum, we can stay at her place tonight with mila." leah spoke, reading your mind completely as your body sagged into hers with a small nod, adrenaline all wearing off now as the exhaustion returned and the defender tenderly kissed your forehead as you sighed.

"you are never allowed in the kitchen unsupervised ever ever again."

[fushigujiro]

boyfriend!onyankopon loves watching you get ready. don’t matter for what, how, if it’s lazy or all out, he just loves watching the process of you getting ready for anything even your temper tantrums because your hair isn’t cooperating or you have nothing to wear (your closet is full as shit). he loves the makeup part the most. he watches intensely from start to finish, just quietly sitting like an obedient boy. he observes your style when you get to the dressing part and just admiring the small details you make to accessorize your outfit. his little fashionista baby (he swears you get the drip from him).

boyfriend!onyankopon just has to touch you. he can’t just not touch he wants to touch you, he needs to touch you. he loves touching you, simple as that. everytime you guys are home he wants you cuddling by him, on him, straddling his lap, to lay his head on your thighs, your chest, your arms- he wants to be in your skin and i’m also going to add that he loves smelling you. he thinks it’s a fetish but to be honest he can’t help it he loves your natural smell and the scent combo you use all the time, makes him wanna lick you…n sometimes he does randomly but you allow it

boyfriend!onyankopon is very intimidating from afar but as you both got closer and he became your man, he’s a big ass softy not only for you but small animals. (he’s a cat lover) you both have a pet kitty at home that he secretly acts like he’s not obsessed but lets kitty sleep with you guys at night, takes her out for errands, and gets her cute clothes. one time, in the middle of the night, 3 of you were in bed and you’re just resting your eyes while he thought you were sleeping and played with kitty on his lap. he was just softly cooing at her and humming until you heard him say “i love you two girls so much” his deep voice professed, softly petting the smaller girl that purred at his touch and love…a little did he know, you did too<3

boyfriend!onyankopon is so freaking sassy it’s actually ridiculous but i’ll get to that part soon. he loves to tease you. he can never go a full day without being “did i annoy her today? i need to do so before the day ends” it’s his mission to annoy or else he wouldn’t think he was an up to par man for you apart from other things that he knows he’s got down..multiple times *wink* but i digress. he teases you, will mock you, bother you, annoy you and it’s very irritating but adoring because it’s him. though, the thing is the second you tease him back he’s like a damn sass man and so childlike which brings me back to the beginning on why i said he’s so damn sassy. muthafucka will stay having his arms crossed, looking everywhere but you, will side eye you, roll his eyes, give attitude that’ll make you be like… “is this me right now? huh??” but if you make it up to him he’s grinning like a cheshire cat…just bad

boyfriend!onyankopon is a very laid back man. he’s very chill. he’s chill about you, he’s not obsessive- crazy obsessive at that, he lets you do you and he’s your personal cheerleader (we love to see it). he will always encourage you to do anything you wanna do but because i said he’s a laid back man doesn’t mean he won’t get protective over you. if a guy bumps into you he won’t hesitate to get in front and confront the man in his face. he doesn’t have to say too much, with how he speaks, his deep almost baritone voice and his low lidded but intense gaze is enough to turn a grown man into a baby and back off scared.

boyfriend!onyankopon loves taking pictures of you. yess he loves living in the moment but then again, he can live in it and remember it when he goes to his photo album that's named 'my pretty girl🤞🏾' and looks at all the pictures and videos he's took of you over the years. baby pictures ‘n videos he got from your family, pictures you asked him to take of you when you dressed up nd felt pretty, funny pictures you both laugh at as well as pictures you'd kill him for because they’re the off guard. you’ll forever see a phone in his, has flash on ( purposely) and will go up in your face, snap it and put it as his wall paper….he loves you so much

boyfriend!onyankopon will let you do anything to him. did I mention baby boy has a whole tattoo sleeve? looks so yummy on his buff arms but I digress for the nth time. he'll let you use washable multi color markers on his tattoos as when you get bored 'cuz you tend to use him as a "experiment" is how he'd put it. if you wanna do his makeup he'll huff and puff but he'll let you do it just so he can hear your pretty laugh and gaze at that beautiful smile. wanna put a soothing face mask on him? he's agreeing. he likes doing these things with you it creates beautiful memories with his girl. he enjoys the mask, the roller, gua sha- even you tweezing his eyebrows. he'll lay back with you straddling him, his big veiny hands rubbing up and down your thick thighs whilst his eyes are closed to just enjoy the moment of you blabbering nonsense with you doing his face and kitty coming on the bed to cuddle by his shoulder....he loves it here and never would dream wanting it to end.

꒰ note ꒱.....it's been 3 years of procrastination + writers block and lord have mercy it's been too long since i've wrote something but my life has been too much since then. after some motivation from my bf and the most help (from my bf<33) i'm back again! i'm open for requests to get more things out andddd just happy to be back<3 (thank you babe for everything)

[edenspoem]

ermmm jackson!ellie fluff (that slows into suggestive themes) (not planned) trigger warning: Pregnancy. loser!faggot!GAYGAY!ellie. conclusion ellie loves milfs. center img from joelbebi.

sorry not sorry thinking about jackson!ellie x pregnant!reader (ripcord promo what about it?): who insists on throwing a baby shower for you, come rain or come impenetrable shine. now—ellie has no soft spot for parties; once, the town held a get-together for her seventeenth and invited joel, whom at the time she would entertain not a single word with, so, that speaks for itself. but something cracks her poor, forbidden and encrusted heart seeing you, sullen, fearful, and prepared to bring a little one into jackson without a smile about it. her freed heart gives itself a firm squeeze imagining all the impossible things she could give to your child—or the love of her life. but do you know that?

the whole hating-parties ordeal still strums its chord within ellie; she doesn't suck up to vanity and hosts it in joel's living room, (don't worry—they've made with good terms at this point!) all plain poppies, carnations and yellowed wallpaper (because the red means she loves you) but quite a humbling of invitations: her immediate friends and a few regulars on patrol, but nothing serious. and it especially makes sense when ellie chooses to give you your presents (or theirs) in private, the subtle rapture of conversation subdued a floor down. “here.” her freckled hands held out a box, with suspiciously good brown-paper wrapping you speculate to be joel's handiwork, unable to withhold the smile when she does. she follows along it with a continuation, “found it a long time ago—but, i guess you'll need it more than anyone else, now.” she pats her own thigh anticipatingly once its in your curious grasps, bouncing the same leg.

you sighed, soft as heaven. “you're too sweet.” and she is, going out of her capacities to accomodate your needs. the promise after that proves it. “um, you can also.. borrow or use whatever the fuck you need from my place—or joel's, cause he suggested that i.. uh, keep a warm bed ready. i think that's what he said, not sure what he meant by it though,” she all but sailed smooth, stuttering herself into confusion, and a laugh. it mattered no more, though, than the sweet, quick, quirk of her lips post-sentence, and her awkward (but cute) picking-at-a-random-spot-on-her-jeans is saliently interrupted—with a kiss. “it means you'd be sleeping on the floor.” you inched closer, catching her off-guard when she perked up at the silent shifting of the bed. “but i don't mind sharing.” moreso, when she forgets to close her eyes the second your lips clasp her upper one, surprised—but not at all complaining. she accepts it with an overwhelming kiss to reciprocate (the one she's been dreaming of, with a hungry pout and loving hand reaching up), and possibly a few marking over the round of your belly as she does what a Milf-loving-girl would do. The End <3

[muqingslover]

hiii, can you please share more goofy habits caleb has while sharing a bed with u 💝

[ By popular demand i'm here to share extra thoughts on Caleb's sleeping habits! Kinda of a part two to this, in case you missed! ]

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Oh boy there's so much to unpack here. We all know Caleb has experienced a loooot of bad things and has not worked through them in an actual healthy way at all. He is also a master at hiding it from you, but you can get a glimpse of how damaged he truly is during bedtime.

First of all, you will rarely, if ever, catch him sleeping on an actual bed. Or sleeping at all to be honest. What Caleb does is take power naps whenever he can on his couch at the office or when he's at your place waiting for you to. The one to (partially) blame for this is his chronic insomnia. I like to believe Caleb has always been a very light sleeper and it's only gotten worse throughout the years— The sound of a door opening is enough for him to be wide wake in a matter of seconds. Trust issues anyone?

When he wakes up, if alone, his go-to activity is working out. He'll do push-ups or leave the house for a loooong late night jog, anything that will tire his body out since he's wired up. Then, he takes a freezing cold shower to reboot his system and either starts to work early or sits down to solve some calculus problems to prevent his mind from thinking about anything else since it's 98% of the time never anything good.

To add to that, the main reason as to why his insomnia is so bad is the fact he has nightmares on an almost daily basis. They're often about you in some way and he wakes up panicking about where you are, how you are, if you're with someone else, why you aren't here with him instead and if you plan on leaving him. That's why it's so crucial for Caleb that you stay somewhere he can see you whenever he needs to. Otherwise, his anxiety will gnaw at him until he just shows up unprompted on your front door in the middle of the night.

On the topic of nightmares, next thing on the list is a more...sensitive one: His reactions to nightmares that involves the abuse Caleb himself went through. I say sensitive because this man is a trained soldier and he wakes up in very high alert which, sometimes, means he might hurt you by pure reflex similar to retired war veterans.

The first time you woke up with his hands tightly wrapped around your neck you seriously thought you were a goner. The sound of your voice calling his name was fortunately enough to make him snap out of the haze he was trapped in, believing he was under the threat of the ghosts of his past and had to defend himself before it was him the one who would end up dead. You have always been his anchor, it was not a surprise that you were the only one able to pull him back even in a moment like this.

Regardless if he had been in control or not, Caleb would blame himself until his last day on this world. He wouldn't sleep (Key word being sleep because he will stay in bed with you, he just won't *sleep*) on the same bed as you anymore after this and instead spends his nights on a mattress on the floor next to you. The sight of your bruised neck and the tears in your eyes because of his hands, because of him, only serve as fuel for his nightmares. He doesn't even want to imagine what would've happened if you hadn't been able to speak loudly enough to wake him up.

"Caleb is a big spoon!!" people yell at me and I agree! However! If you want this man to have some peaceful sleep then the only way to achieve that is to have him laying on your chest where he can both listen to your steady heartbeat and feel your warmth as he holds you. Run your fingers through his hair and promise him you'll be right there when he wakes up to soothe his anxieties as much as possible and he might just sleep throughout the entire night.

Moving on to more sweet thoughts so we don't end on a bitter note— He has serious beef with the plushies you own, specifically the ones you hug to sleep. I mean, he's right here? Hello??? Why would you want to hug that fat ass bear of yours. If your plushie goes missing one day through suspicious means don't be sad because you can just cuddle him! He promises he'll behave this time!

Another silly thing is Caleb cannot keep his hands to himself when the two of you are sharing a bed. Literally. His hands have a will of their own and they must be touching you at all times in some way. That also means he will bother you by torturing tickling you non-stop until you're on the verge of tears. He loves the sound of your joyful laughter and how red your face gets while you try to escape the evil tickle monster so I'm afraid there's no way to get him to actually stop.

[agneaul]

i can’t sleep so i wrote this

Harsh, white light illuminates your face in the dark. You’re meant to be asleep. If you want to be any version of productive in the morning, you need to go to sleep. You’re exhausted, too tired to even rest. The bed creaking with laughter at every toss and turn, mocking your weariness.

You need to go to sleep.

Instead, your thumb scrolls down your phone screen. Tara certainly posts a lot. You’re careful not to like any of her posts however - she’ll see the timestamp and fret over you in the morning. Best not to worry her, she has enough on her plate.

The sudden vibration of your phone jolts you out of your mindless haze. Blink once, twice. Read the contact. Sylus.

For a split second you consider ignoring him, he’s probably going to pull you into some mess - then again, if he’s calling you this late…he could be in trouble? A deal must have gone wrong, or he’s gotten into a fight with a Wanderer. What if he needs your help?

You answer quickly, speak on an urgent breath. “Are you okay?”

His easy chuckle flows over the line, your shoulders untense. Damn him.

“Worried about me, kitten?”

You huff, easily pull a lie out from under your pillow. “You just woke me up, what do you expect?”

He scoffs, a familiar sound to you at this point. “I expect honesty. you weren’t asleep at all, were you?”

You roll over on your back with a sigh. You force out a dramatic yawn to double down. “How could you know that? My curtains are drawn, Mephisto can’t see in here.”He chuckles openly at this, you both know he’s not above sending his mechanical little spy to check on you.

Metal clicks and clinks over the phone, you have a brief but vivid image of his hands disassembling a revolver. You swallow.

Sylus’s voice is matter-of-fact, he’s knowingly caught you in a lie. “The twins saw that you are ‘currently active’ online.”

Your silence is all the answer he needs.

Again, he laughs.

A surge of irritation forces a groan out of you. You can feel his smug little smile all the way in Linkon.

“Alright, you caught me!” You drape your forearm over your eyes, heave out another sigh. “I can’t sleep, okay? did you call to pester me or tell me a bedtime story?”

The line is quite a moment, except for the weighty, metal thunks - the distinct sound of bullets being loaded into a chamber.

“Would that help you fall asleep?” Sylus’s voice softens around the edges in a way you haven’t heard before. You eye your phone skeptically…You (of course) won’t admit it to him, but the deep timbre of his voice does help you relax.

With a hum, you adjust your pillow, pull the blanket up your chest. “If you insist, i won’t stop you.”

He scoffs at your teasing lilt. All the way in the N109 Zone, he smiles at you.

Sylus clears his throat, and begins telling you a (rather boring) story about a girl who spent most of her days stuck inside a sanctuary.

Before he can get to the ending, you’re already asleep. Sylus listens to your steady, even breaths - his shoulders untense.

You’re fast asleep, so you don’t hear him say, “Goodnight, sweetheart.”

[wbbfannnnnn13]

Almost, Always - Chapter 9

paige x azzi

Previous Chapters: Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8

A/N: I think I'll just let this chapter speak for itself, but just a heads up, this is mostly angst. The next handful of chapters will be a little shorter so I can go back and forth on perspectives as I advance the storyline without confusing myself lol.

Hope ya'll like it!

WC: 2.5k+

Chapter 9: The Spiral 

Paige didn’t sleep. She was spiraling, and it started the second her head hit the pillow, if not earlier. Her chest felt tight, her thoughts too loud, looping the same questions she couldn’t outrun. Was this the beginning of the end? Or had they already passed that point and she just hadn’t realized it yet?

She stared at the ceiling for hours, jaw tight, stomach twisted, phone still glowing beside her like a taunt. Her body was exhausted, but her mind wouldn’t shut up, looping the same questions, the same anger, the same regret.

How did this happen? Why did this happen?

She was mad at herself. For being naive enough to think that love could conquer all, even when she’d seen how unforgiving the world could be. Azzi had once told her that love didn’t mean much if it couldn’t withstand the hard parts, and Paige had believed her. But now, lying in bed with regret crawling under her skin, she wondered if maybe she’d mistaken hope for strength. Maybe she’d underestimated just how much pressure came with being seen. That it would be strong enough to hold under the weight of exposure, instead of warping under it. Believing the media wouldn’t be able to affect their relationship. She lay there questioning all the choices over the past few months. Maybe she had stepped out into the light of her relationship with Azzi too fast, hoping their love would be enough to steady the glare. Maybe she'd been foolish to think their love could exist outside the scrutiny of the public eye.

More than anything, she just wanted to hear Azzi’s voice. That was all she kept thinking. The silence was unbearable. It was unfamiliar because it wasn't like Azzi at all. Her last text to Azzi had been simple, desperate: I just want to hear your voice. And now, with nothing but the faint glow of her screen beside her, Paige realized how deeply she meant it. It wasn’t even about fixing anything. She just needed that one grounding sound—the one thing that always made her feel like she wasn’t drowning—her voice. 

She told herself to stay off her phone, but curiosity got the better of her. Soon she was scrolling through TikToks, watching people stitch her press conference moment, where she’d all but confirmed her relationship with Azzi, against the photo from the restaurant and that old college video. Clips of strangers reacting to fragments of her life, dissecting her body language, her words, her choices. Some came to her defense, calling out the double standards, the reach of internet speculation. But others were quick to pile on, questioning her loyalty, her values, even who the woman in the restaurant photo was.

How people were taking two disconnected moments to spin a story that couldn’t be further from the truth made her feel sick. And yet, that story had traction now. It wasn’t just background noise—it was starting to shape perception. Paige knew her agent was already working with a PR team to do damage control, but she couldn’t stop thinking about how little that actually mattered. The rumors were already circulating, the headlines already shaping opinions, and no statement or carefully worded press release could rewind what had already sunk its teeth into the narrative. 

And she hated that. She hated having her integrity and values called into question. She had always tried to be a good person, someone others could look up to- a role model for younger girls and boys who followed her career. Now there was this blemish on her name, her reputation, and her career. She wished she could brush it off. But she couldn’t. The noise still got to her—still found the cracks in her armor, still made her feel exposed in ways she couldn’t shake.

What cut deepest wasn’t the internet or the headlines. It was wondering what Azzi thought. That’s what mattered most. That’s what kept her spiraling. Not strangers’ assumptions, but the silence from the one person whose opinion could actually hurt her.

Azzi hadn’t answered. Not after three FaceTimes, a call, five texts. Just silence. Paige couldn’t stop thinking about how it must have looked from her perspective. And worse, how it made Azzi feel.

She cared what people thought. She always had. But that paled in comparison to how much she cared about what Azzi thought. That silence meant something. And the more it dragged on, the more Paige began to wonder if it meant everything.

Some anonymous account had handed that video to Azzi raw. Without context. Without nuance. Without explanation. Of course Azzi was upset. How could she not be?

And Paige resented the way that memory resurfaced, uninvited and sharp, cutting through everything she’d tried to leave buried. She didn’t like remembering that version of herself—the one who reacted instead of thinking, who tried to numb her hurt instead of facing it. But there it was again, playing on a loop in her head. The truth was, yeah, she got drunk that night. Stupid drunk. Sloppy, loud, reckless in a way she hadn’t been in a long time. And that girl? The one from the video?

She didn’t even remember her name.

She’d barely spoken to her. Someone handed her a shot glass, another song came on, and she let herself get lost in the noise. She danced, laughed too loud, leaned into the distraction. Somewhere in her head, a bitter thought had crept in—If Azzi doesn’t care, why should I? It wasn’t spiteful, not fully. Just wounded and impulsive, the kind of reckless thinking that never led anywhere good.

It wasn’t some calculated betrayal. It wasn’t planned. It was messy and impulsive and fueled by the kind of hurt Paige didn’t know how to sit with at the time. And yeah, maybe the girl had kissed her neck, and maybe Paige didn’t stop it fast enough. But it hadn’t meant anything. Nothing about that night meant anything.

Except the regret.

Because the truth was, Paige had brought the girl home. Not because she wanted her, but because she was drunk, angry, and aching for something to distract her. They had stumbled back to her apartment, laughing too loud, still riding the buzz of liquor and adrenaline. The girl had started to kiss her, hands wandering, breath warm against her skin. Paige let it go for a moment—long enough to feel like she was slipping into something she couldn’t come back from.

But she pulled back. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t pretend. Because no matter how far she tried to run from the hurt, it wasn’t this girl she wanted. It never had been. And she knew, even drunk, even reckless, that sleeping with someone else wouldn’t dull what she felt for Azzi. It would just make it worse. And she wasn’t cruel enough to use someone just to try and forget the person she couldn’t stop loving.

She had mumbled something—an apology, maybe—and asked the girl to leave. Alone again, she’d collapsed into bed with the taste of regret already sour in her mouth.

She hadn’t slept with anyone. But it still felt like a betrayal. Because she knew that no matter how she tried to distract herself, there was only ever going to be one person she wanted. Azzi had always been the one. No one else even came close.

She’d never told Azzi the whole story. Not what it looked like, not what it meant, and definitely not how much it had stuck with her afterward. They’d patched things over, but only on the surface. They’d talked around it, avoided the sharp edges, and let time do the smoothing. But they’d never gone back to that night, never really unpacked it. And now, Paige couldn’t shake the feeling that Azzi might think something worse had happened. Maybe she thought Paige had crossed a line she hadn’t. Maybe she’d filled in the blanks with her own worst assumptions. That thought turned Paige’s stomach. Because Azzi’s silence didn’t just feel like space—it felt like suspicion. And there was nothing worse than knowing the person you loved might be doubting you.

There was another part that made her chest tighten. The photo from the restaurant—of Paige laughing with the woman no one recognized. The internet had latched onto it quickly, theories spiraling within hours. But now, as she replayed it, she wondered how it might have looked to Azzi. Out of context, it looked… loaded. Suspicious, even. And if Azzi asked about it, Paige wasn’t sure how she’d explain without spoiling everything. The truth wasn’t scandalous—it was a secret she’d been carefully planning for weeks.

She even started to wonder if Azzi had actually been upset about the video at all, or if Paige had just projected all her guilt onto it. Maybe it wasn’t the past that stung, but what the present now revealed. What if Azzi was more unsettled by the photo from the restaurant—the woman with her hand on Paige’s arm, the one Paige hadn’t even mentioned—than the video itself? What if it wasn’t about what had happened back then, but about the cracks that had started to show now? What if the silence wasn’t about an old mistake, but about what it exposed—everything Paige had never said, never explained, never been brave enough to confront out loud?

That doubt started to twist in her chest. Maybe the silence was an indication of something deeper. A shift. A change in how Azzi saw them—saw her.

What if this wasn’t just about old mistakes but about the pressure they were both under now? What if Azzi was starting to believe that Paige wasn’t strong enough to carry the weight that came with being seen? The thought gnawed at her, subtle and constant. The questions pressed against her chest, heavy and unyielding, turning her worry into a slow, suffocating ache. Paige could only hope Azzi would answer—just one message, one reply, anything to bridge the silence stretching between them.

She got up sometime after sunrise, unable to lie there anymore. Her body moved on autopilot. Coffee. Shower. A half-eaten granola bar. Everything mechanical, nothing comforting. Her phone remained untouched, unanswered, the screen lighting up with notifications she didn’t check. Because none of those notifications were from Azzi. Paige kept checking, hoping for something, anything. But there was nothing. Just silence. And the longer it stretched, the more it settled into her bones, cold and unrelenting.

Then her eyes landed on the drawer.

She walked over, pulled it open, and gently sifted through everything inside. Beneath a few loose papers and old notebooks sat a small, light blue box, barely the size of her palm. The color alone made her heart ache—a soft, almost sentimental shade that had felt perfect the moment she’d seen it. Inside was a ring. Simple and elegant, set in a delicate silver band with a single diamond, understated but striking. She’d spent weeks finding it—researching styles when no one was watching, texting Aaliyah, Nika, and KK in their group chat late at night with options.

From a couple of weeks ago. 

GROUP CHAT — “No One Tell Azzi 💙"

Paige: ok i’m losing it. which one of these says “marry me forever” but like… in a chill, non-flashy, not-insanely-expensive way???

Paige: like obviously I’d sell a kidney for her but I want it to feel like us not like I robbed a Tiffany’s 😭

Aaliyah: paige omg BREATHE 💀

Aaliyah: but top row, second from the left. it’s giving “lifelong love but make it soft”

Nika: yeah that one. it’s subtle but still says “I’d walk into traffic for you”

KK: you’re so deep in the trenches lmao just pick the one that makes your heart do a cartwheel

Paige: I’m STRESSING. what if it’s too much?? what if it’s not enough?? she’s not even into jewelry like that. she deserves something perfect but like perfect in a quiet way not perfect in a shiny way

Paige: why am i sweating. i’ve looked at the same five rings 47 times

Aaliyah: you’re spiraling and honestly it’s beautiful to witness

Aaliyah: this is like watching a rom-com meltdown in real time

KK: proposal brain got her in a chokehold

Nika: fr you’re one Pinterest board away from completely blacking out

Paige: I JUST WANT HER TO LOVE IT 😭

Aaliyah: she’s gonna say yes even if you propose with a ring pop pls relax

KK: honestly she might like that more 💀

Paige: stop i’m actually considering it now

They’d teased her, but they’d helped her too. It made her feel closer to all of them again, like college hadn’t slipped so far behind her. And it made the idea of proposing feel real, like it belonged to a future that was possible—not just a dream she kept tucked away. That tiny box was a piece of that future. One she’d picked with her people, for her person.

She stared at it for a long time, the weight of it in her hands heavier than she’d anticipated. Not just the metal. But what it meant. What it risked. What it promised.

Then she carefully placed it back and closed the drawer. As her fingers lingered on the handle, something heavy pulled at her chest. That ring, the one she’d chosen on instinct, quietly and without fanfare, held more than intention. It held memories. The bus rides at USA camp, when Paige started to realize Azzi wasn’t just important — she was everything. The first time she saw Azzi laughing in the kitchen of her dorm, barefoot and wrapped in one of her hoodies. The quiet nights tangled on the couch, the whispered dreams about a future they’d only just begun to believe in. The way her name sounded when Azzi said it after a long game, tired but warm. The nights after big wins in college, when they’d sneak off from the noise and stretch time between them — some nights talking for hours about what came next, other nights not speaking at all, just wrapped around each other in quiet, wordless connection that felt like everything. That ring wasn’t just a promise for someday. It was a symbol of every version of them that had existed along the way, every moment that made Paige sure. And now, it sat tucked away in a drawer, waiting. Just like she was.

It wasn’t a decision. Not fully.

It was a pause. A hesitation between the life she wanted and the fear she thought she’d recently outgrown—a fear that still knew exactly where to find her. And now, it whispered something even colder: maybe Azzi didn’t want this anymore. Maybe the silence wasn’t about sorting through things, but stepping back altogether. That thought alone tightened every nerve in Paige’s body, and made her question whether she’d mistaken progress for permanence, hope for certainty.

[dodgeballstuckonthegymceiling]

I'm curious about the if scenario of player who snuck away from platonic yandere Doey.

How would Doey or the three personalities react if player sneaks out of the safe haven but dies or gets badly hurt for some reason and Doey finds it?

If this makes you uncomfortable, it's okay to ignore

Oh, this is going to be sad. You have been warned!

If you like my work, please consider commissioning me or leaving a tip on Ko-fi (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

Yandere Doey & badly injured Player

★ Doey was frustrated when he discovered you had snuck away. When he found you, his heart sank. You were slumped over in one of the interrogation rooms, badly hurt. But thankfully nobody else had found you, if someone had, you would've been eaten by now.

★ Matthew, the most "grown up" of the three, was the first to react in any meiningful way. "We need to help them. Now!" He can't help but blame himself for not keeping a closer watch on you. Doesn't help that Kevin shares his opinion.

★ Kevin's first reaction is to try and find someone or something to blame. "How could they do this?!?" He shouts at Mathew. Lashing out at him because he is the closest target. His rage, however, quickly fades as Doey begins to look you over.

★ Being the most emotional, Jack tries to let Mathew and Kevin take charge. But as he sobbed uncontrollably, his tears left through Doey's eyes. "Please don't be mad at me" he thinks. When you feel better, he will need some hugs.

★ He hadn't been able to protect you, and now you were suffering because of it. As the days passed, he barely left your side. Slightly paranoid that if he looks away, you'll try to leave again. And trust me, that won't be happening.

★ At night, when the others in the Safe Haven were resting, Doey stayed awake. The feeling of inadequacy loomed over them all. When you stirred in your sleep he was immediately by your side. Ready to comfort you if you woke up.

★ Whenever you speak about leavening, Jack's personality shines through. His eyes well up and tug at your heartstrings in a way that’s impossible to ignore. “Please don’t go. I don’t… I can’t see you hurt again.”

★ Matthew tries to balance Jack's emotions with logical arguments. "Do you remember what happened last time?" And "We can't protect you if you keep running off." He would say, his voice steady.

★ Being the last resort, Kevin will turn to fear in an effort to keep you safe. "Do you want to end up like last time?" he would ask, his voice lower and more threatening than usual. "We can't protect you if you keep running off." His tone was harsh, but there was an unmistakable fear in his words.

[oopsiedaisydeer]

ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴛᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ɪ ᴡᴀɴᴛ

…𝘨𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘣𝘰𝘺!𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘵𝘰𝘰

phone sex, angst, loneliness, mental health struggles, sub!chris?, longing, vulnerability, petnames, intimacy, anonymous relationship, love square?

word count - 2k

Daisy sat back on her bed, lazily flicking through the pages of an old magazine, the quiet of her room wrapping around her like a cocoon. The phone sat on the nightstand, the faint hum of the city outside her window the only sound. 

Then, the sharp ring of the hotline broke the silence, making her jump slightly. She reached for the receiver, her fingers brushing the smooth plastic as she answered.

“Hello, this is Daisy speaking.”

“Hey, Daisy,” came the familiar voice, a warmth creeping along her face.

“Hey, Sun. How’s it going?” She leaned back, trying to keep things light, her fingers playing with the cord.

“Ah, same old, you know,” he replied with a soft chuckle, but it sounded a little off, like something was weighing on him. 

“Been thinking about you.” His voice dropped a little lower, the words lingering in the air.

Daisy’s fingers stilled. “Thinking about me, huh?” She could hear the smile in her own voice, the one she had fought to bury under the guise of professionalism. This was just another job. But there was curiosity behind it now. She knew ‘Sun’ well enough to recognise when he was skirting around something.

“Yeah,” he said, and there was a noticeable hesitation before he continued. “I’ve been wanting to… for a while… to ask you for something different.”

Daisy’s heart skipped a beat. "Different how?" she asked, keeping her tone casual but feeling the shift in the air.

There was a pause, and she could almost picture him fidgeting, trying to find the right words. “I don’t just want to talk, Daisy. I... I want to feel close to someone, like... really close, you know? Not just words on a phone.” He exhaled sharply, his breath shaky. “I want you to feel good too. To make someone else feel good.”

She felt a twinge of something in her chest at the softness in his voice. The genuine need. It was a side of him she hadn’t heard before, but now that it was here, in front of her, it struck deep.

“You want me to feel good too?” she echoed, her voice shifting from professional to something more personal, almost tentative. She was used to guiding, used to hearing the desperation in his voice, but hearing him say that made her heart race a little.

“Yeah,” his voice was raw, a quiet pleading wrapped around his words, “Not just me. I want you to feel good too. Can we… can you do that?”

Daisy let the words hang in the air for a moment, feeling the heat creeping up her neck, her pulse quickening. It wasn’t the typical call, and she could tell he was searching for something more, something crossing even their unusual routine.

“I can do that, Sun,” she said, her voice a little lower, a little more intentional now. “Tell me what you need.”

“I just—” His voice wavered, but there was a sense of need now, of real vulnerability she didn’t hear often. “I just want to hear you. Please.”

Daisy’s breath caught at the rawness in his tone, his words softer than usual, as though he was trusting her more than he usually did. Her fingers brushed lightly over her own skin, an unconscious movement that made her feel almost as exposed as her words. She tried to push the shame away, but it clung to her like a shadow.

“I’m here, sweet boy,” she murmured, her tone so gentle that it felt like a touch. “I’ll take care of you.”

His breath came out in a quick, almost frantic exhale, his voice barely above a whisper. “Please. Just... make me feel you. I need you.”

Daisy did something completely stupid then. She slipped her hand under her sleep shorts, laying her hand gently against her slit. It wasn’t like she’d never been affected by particular calls before, but she’d never acted on it, not properly given in before. She tried to steady her breath, keep her voice clear as she spoke again.

“You’re such a sweet boy, Sun… are you touching yourself for me?”

“Mmm yes, Daisy,” he whined into the phone, voice already straining.

Daisy’s breath hitched, fingers brushing the side of her neck as she closed her eyes, Why am I doing this? But it wasn’t about that, was it? It was about the quiet way his presence filled the space between them. Her pulse quickened, a quiet heat spreading through her that she couldn’t explain but didn’t want to stop.

She felt a twinge of guilt twist in her chest as she continued, her fingers trembling not just with desire, but with the weight of the choice she was making. She rubbed a soft, slow circle around her clit with her index finger, “Baby, you sound so needy right now.” 

“I am Daisy, don’t know why, you get me so-” he said, interrupting himself with a groan, “Wish it was you here, right now.”

Her heart sinks, just like the heat does, pooling in her abdomen as she continues her slow movements. It’s too late though, it sends a rush through her, and before she can even stop to think, she’s being stupid again, her voice a mix of insistence and cautiousness. 

“If you were here, what would you do?”

He inhaled sharply, the breath ragged and impatient. “I’d... I’d touch you, everywhere sweetheart. Put my hands on your hips. Feel your skin. Taste you.” His words came out in a rush, each one sending a shiver down her spine. “I’d love every inch of you, Daisy.”

Daisy’s breath came out in a shaky exhale, her body reacting to his words, to the hunger in his voice. “You’re eager to please, Sun…” she murmured, her voice a soft taunt.

Her caller let out a sound that was almost a growl, his breath catching at her words. “Yes,” he admitted, his voice heavy with need. “I want... I want to please you… just…”. He cut himself off, his breath ragged, his control slipping.

She was dripping now, slowly edging herself whilst she listened to his desperate sounds, and she sped up her movements. Daisy teased her opening with her fingers, just enough so that she could still maintain her composure. 

“Are you going to come baby?”

Sun’s breath got even heavier at the question, a deep gasp escaping his lips. “Yeah,” he managed to say, his voice shaking, “Yeah, I... I can’t hold back, Daisy. It’s too much.”

The words sent a shiver down her spine, her body responding to them, to the heat in his voice, the need in his words. “Are you ready?” she said, her voice a soft gasp, “Come with me like a good boy.”

“Daisy,” Sun gasped out, his voice strained but needy, “I’m close. I’m so close.” It was a plea, a gasp, a desperate need for release. 

She moaned in response, soft but full of need, the sound sending a jolt through Chris on the other end. “Daisy,” he said, his pleading voice thick with pleasure, “Please let go. I want to hear from you. Please.”

And she did, her body shuddering as they both came, a low moan escaping her lips. The pleasure coursed through her, leaving her trembling and breathless. “Fuck…”, Chris bit out, his own climax rolling over him, leaving him panting and shaking. “Daisy... fuck... I…”. His words dissolved into ragged breaths.

As her fingers brushed the soft fabric of her shirt, a subtle shiver ran through her. The room felt too quiet now, too still, as if everything around her had slowed down to focus solely on the heat rising in her cheeks. Daisy’s body hummed with the aftershocks, her thoughts swirling, unable to grasp the magnitude of what had just happened. But her heart still beat a little faster, and she wondered if he felt the same.

The phone is warm against her ear, slick where she’s pressed it to her cheek. Her breathing is uneven, drawn out in shallow inhales that don’t quite steady her, no matter how hard she tries. Her hand, still trembling, falls slack against the sheets, fingers curling weakly into the fabric.

Chris’s voice drags through the speaker, rough and ruined, something low and unfiltered slipping out between breaths. She shivers, warmth coiling in her stomach at the sound of him like this—unraveled, lingering in the same haze she’s caught in.

The silence that follows is thick, heavy with the weight of what they’ve done. Not quite a secret, not quite something real. Just this.

Daisy exhales, grounding herself in the rhythmic static of the line, the quiet proof that he’s still there. Still with her.

The phone crackles faintly, the air between them thick with the aftermath of what just happened. Chris lies back on his bed, his breathing still unsteady, his hand resting on his chest. There’s a quiet comfort in the silence, a strange sort of peace that feels almost too soft after all that tension.

He can hear Daisy’s breath on the other end, slow and steady, the sound of her being just as calm and grounded as he’s trying to be.

Chris swallows, his voice rough. “That was… that was a lot.”

Daisy’s laugh is quiet, gentle, more of a hum than anything else. “Yeah… I know.”

They both settle into the soft hum of the phone line, neither of them rushing to break the silence. The weight of the moment lingers, but it’s no longer suffocating. It’s just two people, breathing, existing in this odd, unspoken understanding.

“You good?” Daisy asks after a while, her voice soft and caring, like she’s genuinely checking in.

“Yeah,” Chris says, his lips curving into a small smile. “I’m good.”

There’s a beat of silence, and then she speaks again, this time with a tone that’s different—gentle, almost wistful. “You know, Sun, I think you’re ready to put yourself out there. Whenever you’re ready, of course.”

The words hang in the air, soft and quiet but somehow weighty. Chris blinks, his mind momentarily racing. “What do you mean?”

Daisy’s voice is warm, full of that calm reassurance that always seems to settle his restless heart. “You don’t have to stay stuck, you know? I think you’re capable of more than just… well, this.”

Chris presses his lips together, feeling the faint stirrings of something in his chest, some kind of resistance. The words are like a subtle push, as if she’s gently urging him to step away from all of this, from the lines they've drawn between them, and move forward.

“Maybe you should go for it,” she adds, her voice quieter now, like she’s not just talking to him, but talking to herself too. “Take the risk. Put yourself out there, with someone who’s real. You deserve that.”

Chris’s throat tightens, a soft sigh escaping him. It feels like everything’s shifting in him, like this is the nudge he’s needed but never really wanted. She’s telling him to do something he’s afraid to do, but the way she says it, with that gentle confidence, makes him want to believe it.

“I don’t know if I’m ready for that,” he mutters, more to himself than to her.

“You will be, Sun,” she says, and there’s a softness in her voice, like she knows him better than he realizes. “You just have to trust yourself.”

There’s another quiet pause, and this time, Chris can hear the soft rustle of her breathing. It feels like she’s been both a friend and something more, something that’s so hard to untangle, but it’s comforting, even in its complication.

“Thanks,” Chris says quietly, his hand reaching up to run through his hair, trying to shake off the lingering fog in his mind. “For everything.”

“No problem, Sun,” Daisy says, her tone light but still sincere. “You’re gonna be fine. Just… take care of yourself, okay?”

“I will,” Chris replies, his voice steady now, though he’s not sure how much he believes it.

The silence stretches on, only mildly comfortable this time, like it always was when they first started talking.

“Goodnight, Sun,” she says after a while, soft and warm and sleepy, like she’s already halfway gone.

Chris hesitates. His fingers curl into the sheets, grounding himself in the weight of her words, in the quiet press of something reluctant and unwilling.

“Night, Daisy,” he murmurs, and it feels like a closing, like the beginning of an end he’s not ready to touch just yet.

The line clicks.

Chris stares at the ceiling, the echo of her voice still resting against his skin.

He doesn’t move for a long time.

thank u rose for the divdiers !! @bernardsbendystraws

a/n: im not sure abt this smut but this chapter is vvvv important for lore!!!! also pretty please send asks abt these two i'd love to yap about them <33

taglist: @applecidersturniolo @throatgoat4u @sturnslutz @desreads @courta13 @kier-with-a-k @bluestriips @sturns-mermaid @sweetshuga @snoopychris @st7rnioioss @herewegoagain-b @cowboylikenat @joanakaulitz comment to be added !

till next time <33

[salemlunaa]

Hello sai! hope you're well.

I wish its possible to talk through dm because its kind of vulnerable but itll do!🤗

So, this past two years i have underwent a shift in my mindset. Granted, the void is still one of my main goals but it doesn't dominate my mind like it used to. the @luckykiwiii101 series that was posted before they left the community is why i am more focused on actually using loa instead of leaving my chances up to entering the void via lucid dream.

however... i cant help but feel like im never doing enough, and what comforted me with the void was that i was using methods, TONS of methods so i find it very hard to let go and accept.

Like, i want to enter it everytime i fall asleep but to have that trust that it is a fact is hard.

Its as though all the Edward art lectures and the countless posts im reading are telling me exactly what to do but it still doesn't feel enough yknow?

i get scared when I just live my 3d and forget my desires because what if it just doesn't change? how do i know im doing it right if im not actively doing something!

Everytime i feel fulfilled in my imagination, my 3d knocks me back down to doubt because it is right there. in front of me at all times. im not exaggerating when i say that i am living the same day everyday. wake up before sunrise, go to uni, do a lab go home and bed rot or study. repeat.

even imagining has started to feel like a chore because im not feeling anything, im numb to my desires but not in a fulfilling way.

and i think its because im over actually having desires, i want to have. i dont want to yearn, i want to HAVE it thats why i dont feel when imagining.

what should i do? what would you do in my position?

i, and a lot of people here, know what it’s like to have the 3d smacking you right in the face, repeatedly.

I will say it’s okay to doubt, don’t push yourself further into a spiral with the belief that you must 100% have faith, all you need is to remind yourself that it’s already done. You’re not living this life anymore, you’re a master of the void state (if that’s something you still want) it’s already happened

manifestation should not feel like a chore, you are so much more powerful than you know and and you can have anything by just speaking something or even thinking something into existence. No other methods needed if you keep the reminder in the back of your mind that your desires are already here.

Let’s say your teacher has your name on a piece of paper to do a presentation, no matter what you do whether you try and hide away to the back corner of the class, giggle while hiding behind your friends, go extra quiet so the teacher doesn’t notice you, your name is still on that piece of paper, it’s already done. That’s it, that’s all.

If you need help with reminders, i would recommend rampages on youtube, there are a lot of very useful ones for almost every situation. You can visualise your day and revise the life you live, this especially in the state akin to sleep is so powerful.

Remember you don’t have to do anything. You don’t have to lift a finger or put any effort in, even mentally. The life you want is yours.

[crippleprophet]

let me open by saying I Know How This Sounds (fem whose undergraduate chemistry professor recommended ze take turmeric to cure zyr arthritis, etc) so no hard feelings if you keep scrolling, but hopefully folks who know me know i'm speaking honestly about my experiences, even if those don't end up being the same for other people. so!

2 Tbsp of a common kitchen spice is doing as much or more to manage my ME/CFS as any of my meds or self-medicating drugs

@lakeeffectbitch outlines a way of trying this with a control in their reddit post (link); i just went directly to the one they thought might work so i'll put my experiences & the science/theory behind this under a cut for folks who want to avoid potential placebo effect :)

i'll get more specific about this in the "spoilers" but please be aware, especially folks with diabetes or other blood sugar conditions, that this substance may cause a blood sugar drop. it's less likely at this dose but probably keep a sugary snack on hand just in case

if you experience post-exertional malaise & want to try this but don't have spare money to spend on spices feel free to dm me & i'll see if i can help!

my experience:

i took 2 Tbsp ground sumac mixed with warm water on February 11. i tried taking it with a straw first because that's what my colonoscopy prep had said would make that go down easier but because the sumac particles were so big they didn't want to remain suspended & trying to get them in the straw was difficult, which then made it harder to swallow without, yknow, noticing that you're slurping down sediment

what worked better was getting the powder wet, putting a big clump of it on my tongue, then swallowing it with water like a pill

within about half an hour of taking the sumac it was like my fatigue just faded around me where i stood. it dissolved to the background & when i thought "oh i want to do this" or "i should do that" suddenly i found myself just doing it. i had spent the past week at least bedridden except for the bathroom, & though i took the sumac on a better day, i'd been planning to return to bed with a snack after taking it.

instead, i made myself lunch, and i sat on the couch to eat it. all of this was without taking an edible that day; usually i've gotta take at least 25mg delta 8 + 25mg cbd to even consider sitting on the couch. also, it was storming.

from my write-up the day of: "everything felt very sharp & clear & lucid." i washed the dishes from my lunch. all of these activities were about 2 hours, & at that point i emphatically needed a nap. waking up felt like after taking a muscle relaxer & sleeping: my muscles were more relaxed, & my whole body felt like it'd gotten a bit of a break

i've taken sumac at least 8 times since then on at least 5 different days (this time by modifying this sumac tart recipe to include a lot of sumac powder in the crust, which has been much more enjoyable than the Glass O' Sediment lmao) & adjusting for factors like weather, the effect has been comparable every time:

i watched Inception on the couch with my husband, & understood when she explained things to me

i watched leverage on the couch all day when it was below freezing

i worked a bit on fanfics i've barely been able to touch in a year

i "meal prepped" measuring spices, gathering ingredients, & soaking beans to make beans & rice in the instant pot later that day. i literally can't remember the last time i was able to use my instant pot, after thinking about it i think it was when i made palak paneer last summer, but that was a one-off special occasion thing, i've used it maybe 3 other times since developing ME

i wrote this post

the science:

okay a lot of this shit was over my head before i developed ME so i'm gonna be summarizing at my level lol, look to @lakeeffectbitch for a higher-level analysis

but what i do know! (all images from "The malic acid inhibiting inflammation in ankylosing spondylitis by interfering M1 macrophage polarization" by Ji et al., January 2025)

sumac contains high levels of malic acid, which is found in certain fruits (apples, peaches, etc)

the drugs.com page classifies malic acid as an inactive ingredient, so there are no known drug interactions

mice with ankylosing spondylitis had lower levels of peripheral malic acid than control mice

ID: bar graph showing mice with AS had about 0.03 micromoles per milliliter of peripheral malic acid, compared to the control mice level of over 0.2 micromoles per milliliter. the difference is labeled significant via asterisks. end ID

mice with higher malic acid concentrations had lower ESR and CRP (inflammation markers)

ID: two graphs showing lines with a downward slope. the top graph, ESR versus malic acid concentration, is labeled: r=-0.6802, 95% confidence interval =-0.8843 – -0.2578, p=-0.0053. the graph shows ESR, an inflammation marker, decreasing as malic acid concentration increases. the bottom graph, CRP versus malic acid concentration, is labeled: r=-0.6068, 95% confidence interval =-0.8537 – -0.1371, p=-0.0165. the graph shows CRP, an inflammation marker, decreasing as malic acid concentration increases. end ID

mice treated with malic acid had lower levels of TNF-alpha than the mice with untreated ankylosing spondylitis. humira & similar biologics that treat autoimmune diseases are TNF-alpha blockers

ID: a bar graph of relative mRNA expression of TNF-alpha. M0, the control mice, has a relative expression of 1. M1, the mice with ankylosing spondylitis that did not receive treatment, has a relative expression of slightly less than 4.5. M1+MA, the mice with ankylosing spondylitis who received the malic acid treatment, has a relative expression slightly less than 3. this indicates that the mice treated with malic acid had lower expression of TNF-alpha than the untreated mice. asterisks between M0 and M1 and between M1 and M1+MA indicate significance. end ID

the mitochondrial function of M2 macrophages in mice treated with malic acid "was significantly enhanced"

analysis of the mice's spinal tissue blew my fucking socks off. trying not to jump to conclusions & i know journal articles are full of errors but that looks potentially disease-modifying.

ID: a 5x3 presentation of samples of mouse spinal tissue. the control mice, which are healthy, have thick, undamaged, glowing tissue. the mice with ankylosing spondylitis have thin, curved, cracked-looking tissue. the mice treated with celecoxib, a common prescription NSAID for arthritis, appear very similar to the untreated mice. the mice treated with 250mg/kg of malic acid per day have tissue in between the untreated and healthy appearances; the tissue is "glowing" like the healthy tissue but still narrower and curved, although less so than the untreated tissue. the mice treated with 500mg/kg of malic acid per day have tissue which looks even closer to the healthy appearance, with less curvature than the other treatment groups. end ID

since i started drafting this post i've started taking these malic acid supplements from Nature's Life – the full dose made me feel weird including some heartburn so i cut the capsules & take roughly 2/3 – 3/4 of it at a time (i drop the rest into a spare pill jar to make more doses from). it's been similarly effective for me

please be aware that the supplement instructions say to only take it once a day, i haven't had any issues but everybody is different & this avenue is definitely under-researched! (the mice were given 250mg/kg per day which for me would be like 27 grams but i am not a mouse lol)

[matchalovertrait]

Will the truth prevail? 🤔

Start from the beginning (Gen 2)

Previous | Next

NOTE: The build is by the awesome @authorspirit! One of my favorite builders ever. Seriously, I feel like I try to snatch all the builds from her 😆 Unfortunately, my screenshots didn't do the place justice. You can check it out here.

NOTE: Selene is pronounced like Seh-leh-neh. No, the "mrow" was not a typo hehe

NOTE: Imagine this whole conversation was in Spanish! Speaking of which, "Andele güey" is basically Antonio saying, "Way to go, man," in a sarcastic way or "see what you did?" I'm not really sure how to translate that directly. And before anyone comes for me, no I don't mean "andale," I do mean "andele"! That's what my family says lol

[Antonio's Apartment; Del Sol Valley, California]

[It was midnight when Antonio heard a knock on the front door... but he wasn’t expecting anybody? Before doing anything, he looked through the peephole in case it was anyone dangerous.]

[It was Yoltic! When Antonio opened the door, the guy with the red hair strutted inside and promptly handed Antonio a packed meal in a brown bag.]

YOLTIC: Uber Eats delivery!

[A puzzled Antonio placed the bag on the surface behind him.]

ANTONIO: ..Thank you for the lunch?

YOLTIC: Dulce made you vegan enchiladas. You never showed up to the party, so she asked me to bring you some. Her family and friends were asking for you.

ANTONIO: Really? I hardly talked to them.

YOLTIC: Yeah. Do you know how difficult it was to defend your absence in front of your girlfriend and in-laws? You’re welcome for that.

ANTONIO: Not my girlfriend. Not my in-laws.

SELENE: Mrow.

ANTONIO: Andele güey, you woke up the cat.

YOLTIC: Oops! Sorry, Selene.

YOLTIC: ..Listen, I wanted to talk to you.

ANTONIO: Right now?

YOLTIC: You’ve been acting weirder than usual lately.

ANTONIO: You’re not completely normal either.

YOLTIC: Don’t try to change the subject!

ANTONIO: I’m fine. You can go home now.

YOLTIC: Then why have you been hiding? You leave at the most random times.

[START FLASHBACK]

NOEMÍ: Are you sure you're not also an actor? Something about your face tells me you’re famous.

ERICK: We are near Hollywood after all!

DULCE: I see Angel and the rest of the family!

ANTONIO: Sorry to crash the party but we need to head inside now.

YOLTIC: Hey, why the rush?? 5 more minutes!

[END FLASHBACK]

ANTONIO: I have a busy schedule.

YOLTIC: Then why’d you go on Operation Fox? That’s not like you either.

ANTONIO: I couldn’t let Isabela win.

YOLTIC: I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you. And as your best friend, I think I deserve to know the truth.

ANTONIO: Truth about what?

YOLTIC: You know what I’m talking about. Weren’t you the one that said “truth prevails” in court?

ANTONIO: You know I have to say shit like that. This is a waste of time. I’m going to sleep.

YOLTIC: You haven’t been sleeping! I know you work long hours, but I can see something is bothering you. You have the day off tomorrow, anyway. Just let me help you.

ANTONIO: Nothing is bothering me!

YOLTIC: Fine! You leave me no choice!

[Yoltic handed Antonio a folded-up sheet of paper. Antonio stared at him. What the hell is this? He turned around to unfold it.]

ANTONIO: ...How did you-

YOLTIC: Now do you want to talk?

[breezyblossoms]

PART 1

PART 2

The days after your conversation with Xaden were quiet. The halls of Basgaith seemed emptier without his presence, even though you tried to fill the silence with Bodhi, Garrick, and the usual activities. It was as if the weight of your words had settled in the air, hanging between you and the world around you. You had been careful to keep your distance from Xaden, though you couldn’t stop yourself from stealing glances every now and then, especially during the times when Violet was by his side.

She was always with him now. Whether it was during meals, in training sessions, or while they were preparing for the next mission, you saw the way Xaden’s attention shifted entirely toward her. There were moments when his gaze lingered, so obvious that it nearly broke your heart, and you would look away, pretending that you didn’t care. But you did.

You loved him, and it was an ache that wouldn’t leave.

⸻

A week had passed since that day on the parapet. You hadn’t seen Xaden since, nor had you spoken to him. You had locked yourself in your room, convinced that distancing yourself from him was the only way to survive this ache in your chest.

It was late one evening, long after the rest of the riders had gone to sleep, when a soft knock echoed against your door. You hesitated, the familiar ache in your heart making it difficult to even consider opening the door. You knew it was him.

With a deep breath, you stood and walked over to open it.

Xaden stood in the doorway, his figure framed by the dim light of the hallway. His eyes were filled with a mix of guilt and something you couldn’t quite name. He stood there, as if unsure whether to speak or to leave.

“Can I come in?” he asked quietly, his voice uncertain.

You looked at him for a long moment, your heart pounding in your chest. He had hurt you, yes. But there was still a part of you that wanted him to come in, to hold you and make the pain go away. But you couldn’t let him do that. Not when things were this broken.

“I don’t think we should talk right now, Xaden,” you said softly, trying to keep your voice steady, trying to guard your heart. “We’ve already said what needed to be said.”

“I know,” he said quickly, almost too quickly. “But I can’t leave it like this. Please, Y/N… Let me explain. Let me try to fix this.”

You stared at him, the tears threatening to spill. “You’ve already chosen her, Xaden. There’s nothing left to fix. You’ve made your choice, and I respect that.”

He flinched, as if your words physically hurt him. “It’s not like that,” he whispered, taking a tentative step forward. “It’s not about choosing her over you. I never wanted to hurt you, Y/N. You mean everything to me.”

“Then why are you with her?” The words left your mouth before you could stop them. The anger, the hurt, it all came rushing out. “Why are you pushing me away and staying by her side? Why didn’t you choose me when I needed you the most?”

Xaden’s expression softened, and he reached out for you, but you stepped back. “Please,” you whispered. “Don’t.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” he breathed, his voice cracking. “I was selfish. I thought I was doing what was right — what I had to do. I thought you’d understand, but I see now that I was wrong. I took you for granted. I always have.”

You shook your head, a laugh escaping you, but it was bitter. “You didn’t just take me for granted, Xaden. You left me. You chose to let me go without a second thought. And now you come to me, asking for forgiveness? You don’t get to do that. Not after everything.”

“I know,” he said, voice hoarse. “I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I don’t deserve anything from you. But I need you to know that I’ve made a mistake. And I’m willing to do anything to fix it. Please.”

The raw desperation in his voice made your heart ache. But you couldn’t let him in again, not when the walls you had so carefully built around yourself felt so fragile.

“Xaden… you made me believe in something that wasn’t real. You made me feel like I was the one. And now you expect me to believe that after everything, you can just fix this? After everything you’ve done… you really think I can just go back to how things were?”

He stared at you, clearly broken by your words, but he didn’t move. “I don’t know how to fix it, Y/N. But I can’t live with the thought that I’ve lost you. I can’t. I’ll regret it every day for the rest of my life if I don’t try to make this right. If you give me a chance, I’ll prove it to you. I’ll show you that I’m not the man who left you behind. I’ll be the person you thought I was. I’ll be the person you need.”

You closed your eyes for a moment, the weight of his words settling on your shoulders. You wanted to believe him. You really did. But the pain of his absence had been too much, too deep. You weren’t sure you could ever trust him the same way again.

“I don’t know if I can,” you whispered, your voice barely audible. “I don’t know if I can trust you again, Xaden. It hurts too much.”

Xaden’s eyes filled with unshed tears, but he didn’t say anything. He just looked at you, like you were the only thing in the world that mattered. And in that moment, something inside you shifted. You knew he wasn’t the same person you had known before. But that didn’t mean there wasn’t hope.

“I’m sorry,” you said, voice trembling. “I can’t promise anything. But maybe… maybe we can try again. But I need time. I need you to give me space. I need time to heal.”

He nodded, a small, almost imperceptible sigh escaping his lips. “I’ll give you all the time you need, Y/N. I’m not going anywhere. I just… I need you to know that I’m here. For you. Whenever you’re ready.”

As he stepped back, the door between you slowly closing, you felt a wave of uncertainty and fear rush through you. But there was a small part of you that still held on to the love you had once shared with him. Maybe it wasn’t gone forever. Maybe it just needed time to heal.

And maybe, just maybe, with time, you’d find your way back to each other.

But for now, the distance was all that could save you.

[cheeseborgorbord2]

Beauty Created in the Strangest Way

(amab) Sevika x (afab) Harpy reader headcanons

Men and minors DNI

Warnings: fluff, dead dove content, dead animals, depression, smut, breeding, breastfeeding

Jinx and Isha cammeos

SFW

⇒You and Sevika cuddle and sleep every night in your makeshift nest. She's completely forgotten her own bed exists.

⇒Isha has been teaching Sevika American Sign Language and cues you use to communicate with the lack of hands, while Jinx has been teaching you to speak. You couldn't get it right the first few times, but slowly, you mimicked her. And to Sevika's dismay, you occasionally go on cursing tangents.

⇒You hide any feathers you take off into her hair. Sometimes, you come to her with any old flight feathers and bring them to her as a gift. She now has a box dedicated to all the feathers you give her or that she finds herself.

⇒Sevika noticed something strange about you. Recently, you had become more motherly and protective towards Isha when she and Jinx visited and stayed over. You nearly suffocated Isha trying to incubate her and always kept her in your makeshift nest. You would follow her around to make sure she was safe, even to the bathroom- outside, of course. Even harpies understand privacy.

⇒When Isha wasn't there, you'd baby Sevika. You would chew her food and try to regurgitate it back to her. You'd bring her any rats or mice you caught in the apartment and tried getting her to eat them. Sometimes you'd leave them on her pillow as she slept, scaring the fuck out of her when she woke up.

⇒The feathers around your chest and inner thighs were falling off. Some you pulled yourself. Your intimate areas were becoming more visible. Sevika had to slap some clothes on you so you wouldn't scar Jinx and Isha by accidentally flashing them.

⇒She's begun doing more research on harpies. She's read on behaviors, diet, anatomy, and mating habits and rituals.

⇒She learned that the change in behavior was due to the upcoming mating season. You were getting ready to raise a baby, explaining your treatment towards Isha, a child.

⇒You've stood in your nest for days, not getting up for food or water. Sevika had to get it for you. To lessen the load on you, she would take turns on keeping the nest warm. She wanted to get an understanding of what she might get into.

⇒Then, one miraculous day, you laid an egg. The egg was as large as an emu's, with brown freckles scattered around the white shell. You were so proud of your creation that you brought it to Sevika the moment she returned from work. She could see the joy in your eyes as your feathered tail wagged. She placed a gentle kiss on the egg before handing it back to you.

⇒She watched as you kept the egg warm under your feathers for 2 months.

⇒She also watched as the disappointment and sadness glossed over your eyes when month 3 hit and your first egg never hatched.

⇒You became depressed after your first egg didn't hatch. You wouldn't eat or leave the nest, not wanting to leave your precious egg unattended. Sevika had to fight you to get the egg out, which resulted in several scratches and bites on her attached arm and repairs needed on her mechanical one.

⇒You hadn't eaten in a few days. You refuse to eat. Not even your favorite food, thawed rats, tempts you. Sevika doesn't know what to do.

⇒She brings Jinx and Isha over; she needed some help.

"She won't eat, Jinx! I'm terrified! What if I lose her?" Sevika rambles.

Isha is currently combing through your hair and feathers in comfort.

"When did she stop eating?" Jinx asked.

"After I took her egg away."

"Why would you take her egg away? It's like kidnapping a baby. Even I wouldn't do that," Jinx crossed her arms. "You practically took her baby away."

"Damn it, I know. But her egg didn't hatch. She wouldn't leave her egg. I had to take it."

"What if you get her a fake egg?" Jinx proposes.

"Where in the world am I going to get an egg the size of Isha's head?"

"I dunno," Jinx shrugged. "Wait, did you say the size of Isha's head? Damn...Which side did she push it from?"

"Jinx!" Sevika scolded.

"What? Geez, I can't ask?" Jinx puts her hands up in defense.

Sevika huffed as she looked over at you. She saw how motherly you were with Isha. She didn't know what to do. She felt helpless, and that was her most hated feeling.

⇒One night, as she lays in the nest next to you, she thinks back on the research she did. She remembers a page she read on mating rituals and habits. Female harpies have been known to force humans into mating and becoming sperm donors, resulting in female offspring. Then, an idea popped into her mind; she could willingly mate with you.

⇒The next morning, she caresses your face, her calloused hands running over your skin. You let out a small tired trill as you're awaken with rare gentleness.

"Morning, Birdie. You okay?" She asked, her thumb running along your cheek. You shake your head, resting it against her chest.

"I can make it better."

NSFW

⇒Sevika kisses you with passion and sweetness. She puts all her love in the way she kissed you, the way her hands roamed your feathered body.

⇒Her hands slip off the tube top and boxers she lended you, revealing your fully naked parts to her. She worshipped your nipples with her mouth as her thick fingers ran along your slip.

"You want this, my good girl?" She whispered into your ear. You nod, letting soft moans slip out.

⇒Her fingers start at a low pace inside you at first but speed up when you beg her to.

"P-please, fuck, fuck," you choke out.

⇒When she makes you come, you waste no time in struggling to take her pants off, but damn these wings.

⇒ She's huffing and panting as she thrusts her hips up as her cock drives deeper into your tight pussy. The sounds of skin slapping echo throughout the room. Your gummy walls gripped her like a vice, sucking her in further, the tip of her cock hitting your cervix. Your wings wrap around her as she brings you closer to another orgasm.

"Co...come..ing!" You squeak as your walls spasm around her.

"Fuck!" Sevika groans, her hips thrusting up a final time, her hands holding your hips down as she shoots thick ropes of cum into your womb.

⇒She peppers kisses all over your face after coming down from her orgasm. She gently lays you down against the pillows, allowing you to relax before moving her hips again, fucking her cum more into your womb. Your tits bounce with every impact of her hips against your thighs.

⇒She lifts your hips up, angling them, her shaft rubbing against that special spongy spot that makes you see stars. The friction quickly brings you to your third climax. She slows her movements.

⇒ The next thing you know, she's folding you in half, knees to your chest, into a mating press, roughly pounding herself at the delicious angle. Her heavy balls, churning copious amounts of cum, slap against your slightly feathered ass.

⇒She's whispering sweet nothings into your ears as she gets close.

"Gods, I love you so much. Good girl. I can't wait to have a baby with you."

⇒Her hips deliver the final blow as she busts more seed into your womb, holding you close. Her cum drips out with her cock inside, your womb and pussy filled to the brim.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

SFW (again)

⇒Sevika is happy when you begin eating again.

⇒She's awoken in the middle of the night by you shaking her to show her the five new eggs you finished laying. She smiled, a tear slipping out her eye.

⇒It's been two more months. Any day now, the eggs should hatch. Sevika has called in sick with food poisoning and is staying at home. She wants to be there when her babies are born.

⇒You two are asleep when the sounds of cracking break the silence of the night. You two immediately perk up at the noise. You lift up your feathers to the sight of cracked shells. As you move for Sevika to get a better view, your eyes light up.

⇒Two of the eggs hatched successfully. Two baby harpies are born, naked wings and small yet sharp talons. Their skin is light brown, and they have small tufts of hair and feathers covering spots on their heads.

⇒You hold one baby girl to your breast, helping her latch on, your daughter hungrily feeding. Meanwhile, Sevika holds your other daughter in her arms, looking in adoration at her two daughters.

"They're beautiful."

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Headers made with Pinterest images (no art featured in the future is mine, unless stated otherwise). I did make the headers.

Please do not copy my work without credit. Likes and reposts are appreciated.

[mashkatzi]

Luigi’s daughter having a nightmare and Lu comforts her 🥹

You finish up your night time routine and slide into bed. You grab your book off the nightstand and begin reading. The faint sound of Luigi helping your daughter get ready for bed can be heard from across the hall.

Luigi loves spending as much time as he can with his daughter. He helps her change into her pjs, placing a hot water bottle in her bed to get it nice and warm for her. He instructs her to brush her teeth and then smooths her curly hair into a single braid.

“All ready, wanna jump into bed?” She nods in response. He places a hand on her shoulder, guiding her out of the bathroom and into her bedroom. She jumps into bed and demands her dad to read her a story to help her sleep. “Ok, baby. What should we read tonight?” Luigi asks. She walks over to her bookshelf and carefully picks a story, handing it to Luigi while he helps her back into bed.

From the bedroom you can hear Luigi reading to her, he puts on a different animated voice for each character and your daughter gasps, laughs and sighs in time with the story. Once the book is finished, your daughter is already snoring, tired from the day’s activities. Luigi tucks her into bed, making sure to leave a small light on in her bedroom in case she needs it. He leaves the door slightly ajar before making his way back to your shared bedroom.

“She’s knocked out, probably exhausted from all that running around she was doing earlier” he tells you. You look up from your book to see Luigi beginning to undress. He takes off his shirt and replaces his jeans with a pair of plaid pjs. “That’s good. Hopefully she sleeps through the night. I worry about how often she has nightmares.” You say. “No need to worry too much. I think it’s just an overactive imagination. I was the same at that age. She’ll grow out of it don’t stress it, babe” Luigi is always good at putting your mind at ease.

He jumps into bed, equally as exhausted and gets comfortable. You put your book back and switch off the lights, lying back and placing your head on your pillow. Luigi pulls you closer to him, kissing you deeply and wrapping his arms around you. He lets out a soft sigh before kissing you goodnight. “Love you” you tell him. He mumbles a quick “love you more” before he shuts his eyes and drifts off to sleep. You’re not far behind, as you’re lulled to sleep by the warmth and comfort of Luigi’s body wrapped tightly around yours.

You’re awoken by the creaking of your bedroom door. A soft sniffle and a small voice calling out for you. “Mommy, daddy?” Luigi stirs in bed next to you, answering the small voice. “Baby? What’s wrong?” She begins to sob and walks further into your room, closer to the bed. She walks over to Luigi’s side of the bed and he helps her up into his arms. You, a little more awake now, ask if everything’s ok. “I had a scary dream.” She begins to explain. “Again?” Luigi asks, wiping her tears with a gentle hand. Luigi turns himself and your daughter around so she’s sat in between the two of you in your bed. You prop yourself up with one hand and use the other to place it comfortingly on her head, stroking her hair and face.

“It was so scary. There was a giant dragon hiding under my bed and he wasn’t letting me leave. He said he was going to blast me with his fire!” She explains, tears welling in her big puppy dog eyes. She, much like her father, gestures with her hands as she speaks. She extends both arms, almost knocking into you, as she explains how big the dragon was. She carries on explaining how she was feeling, strangely articulate for a child so young. Luigi listens intently, stroking her face and wiping her tears.

“Everything’s ok now, my love” you tell her. “Yeah remember what we talked about? Dreams aren’t real. They’re like your stories that we read, It’s all made up, sweetie.” Luigi explains to her.

She appears more calm now, no longer crying but letting out small sniffles every now and again. “But daddy I was so scared” she says. “I know. But me and mommy will never let anything bad happen to you, would we?” He smiles at his daughter as he talks, taking her small hand into his big one, rubbing a comforting finger across her hand. “Yeah me and daddy are always here for you” you continue to reassure her, copying the small display of affection and taking her other hand. She’s smiling now, calmed by the reassurance that her parents will never let any harm come to her.

Before you can take her back to her own bedroom she asks, “can I sleep here?” She pats the mattress under her and looks up at Luigi, longingly. He could never say no to such a request. Of course baby” he says, chuckling because he knows the hold she has over him. She is a daddy’s girl after all. She lays down in the gap between her parents and smiles. Luigi kisses her on the cheek and tells her she’s safe now. You also kiss her placing a comforting hand on her arm. You adjust the blanket so that it’s covering her and place another small kiss to her cheek. She giggles slightly before kissing both you and Luigi back. “I love you” she tells you. “I love you back” you and Luigi say, in unison. She slowly drifts back into a slumber and you and Luigi watch her as her eyes fall shut.

You see Luigi’s compassion in her. Her caring nature and loving gestures are all from her father. She’s naturally kind and displays a level of understanding that most children her age lack. You know that she, like Luigi, will grow up to be special.

[mirai-e-jump]

TV Station, 3/1/2025 Issue ft. No.1 Sentai Gozyuger Cast Members (translation below)

Publication: February 26, 2025

Fuyuno Mio x Suzuki Hideharu x Kanda Masakazu Matsumoto Jin x Imamori Maya

Fuyuno: While Hoeru has a foul mouth and gives off the impression of being unapproachable, he's occasionally kind, and has a cute side that makes him a character who's prone to being teased.

Suzuki: Mio's normally like Hoeru, don't you think?

Kanda: He's quiet and cool. His way of speaking is abit blunt, which seems to also be similar.

Suzuki: He also has a pure heart, so his kindness can come out at any given moment.

Kanda: He and Hide are the same age, and they're always flirting with each other. Occasionally, the distance between him and us feels off (laughs). However, that changes drastically when it comes to his performance.

Fuyuno: I'm trying to be positively influenced by the atmosphere of the scene, and to react accordingly to everyone's performance.

Suzuki: Rikuo's a former super idol with an overconfident side. He's also putting in the work to justify that, and has a good side to him, that being his kindness. I try to be conscious of my idol like behavior, facial expressions, and speaking patterns.

Kanda: From his vibes to the way he speaks, everything about him is soft and gentle.

Matsumoto: It made me think that such good looking nice guys do exist. He's committed to listening to what others have to say. He's overflowing with kindness.

Kanda: It's amazing that we've gotten this far without him getting cocky over those visuals of his!

Suzuki: Thank you!

Kanda: Ryugi's an out of touch freak, and the only one who's a "Tega Sword follower." He's the oldest of the five, and although he's strong willed, he also has a mischievous side. I hope that I can find just the right balance in expressing that gap without overdoing his character.

Matsumoto: Kanda-san's like a leader. He invites us all to go out for meals together. I feel like we're more of a team now, and I'm really grateful that he creates such opportunities like that for us.

Imamori: He usually pulls us along and is reliable, but……he's abit of an airhead, isn't he?

Kanda: How did you know? I've always kept that hidden (laughs).

Imamori: It felt like you were doing your best to hide it.

Matsumoto: Kinjiro's a 17 year old high schooler. At his core, he's a serious person, but his goal is to become a "party person." It's interesting to see how his values don't match up with those around him. Since there's no character among the five of us who restlessly moves around, I thought I'd take charge of that position.

Imamori: He's surprisingly cool for someone with a cute face.

Fuyuno: I was gonna say the same thing (laughs). The composure he has makes it hard to believe that he's 19 years old, and he's also very good at giving compliments.

Matsumoto: I think I'm just conscious of trying to put my thoughts into words.

Imamori: Sumino-chan is cool, but she's a "high class detective" who'll use her cunningness as a weapon when she needs to. To create a gap between the two, I took it upon myself to play the role more characteristically. I'll watch anime and idols in order to study their cunningness.

Fuyuno: Maya-chan appears more mature on screen. She's always full of energy and makes the atmosphere around her pleasant.

Suzuki: The way she switches from her normal self is amazing.

Imamori: I'm just going along with the fun vibes everyone else helps create.

Fuyuno: Although the five members have widely different personalities, you'll be able to see each and every one of their human dramas. Enjoy this festive program, which also features tons of previous Sentai Reds! _

Sleeping Conditions on the Location Bus

Suzuki: Everyone has a particular way of sleeping, don't they? Masa-kun will lean forward with his neck bent at a 90 degree angle, while Mio doesn't sleep.

Fuyuno: It's true that I don't sleep.

Suzuki: Maya-chan tends to lean against the window, while Jin's head pokes out into the aisle (laughs).

Matsumoto: Something like that happens.

Imamori: Hide-kun's mouth hangs open.

Suzuki: Don't say that. I end up showing off a stupid face, huh?

Fuyuno: Everyone's probably looking at you.

Imamori: Kanda-san brings his own pillow, right?

Kanda: I get motion sickness easily, so if I look around for even a moment, I start feeling nauseous. That's why I use a pillow to keep my neck in place.

Suzuki: I'm the same way, so I get that!

[itsnesss]

Hii I loved the "caught in your gaze" fic you just did!! We need a pt 2 please!! Tyy

𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐠𝐚𝐳𝐞 | sensei wolf × fem!reader

OO1. OO2.

summary | you finally have that date with wolf and you can't deny feeling attracted

warnings | diaz!reader, mild tension, flirtation, kissing, emotional vulnerability, light humor

word count | 3.8 k

author's note | it would help me a lot if you liked, commented and reposted so that more people read what I write and don't forget to follow me, thanks ᡣ𐭩

The night felt colder than usual when you arrived home. The little one in your arms was sleeping soundly, unaware of the storm of thoughts flooding your mind. You had said yes. Yes to dinner, yes to the possibility of something new, yes to Wolf.

As you carefully laid him down in his crib, a sigh escaped your lips. You weren’t sure what had led you to say yes. Maybe it was the exhaustion of carrying everything alone, maybe it was the way Wolf looked at you, like you were more than just a mother, more than just Miguel’s sister. Like he really saw you.

The early hours came quickly, and with them, unease. Every time you closed your eyes, his image came back to you. His voice, his way of speaking with confidence, as if nothing could unbalance him. But what unsettled you the most was the tenderness in his gaze when he had looked at your son.

The next day passed in a mixture of anxiety and excitement. Miguel had spent the morning training and, when he returned, he immediately noticed your mood.

“Are you going to tell me what’s going on, or should I guess?” he asked as he flopped down on the couch, arms crossed.

“It’s nothing,” you lied, busying yourself with the baby’s things.

“Please,” he said with a sigh. “I know when you’re nervous. Is it about the tournament? Or does it have something to do with that guy?”

You tensed, and the satisfied smile on your brother’s face confirmed he had hit the nail on the head.

“Miguel…” you started, but he raised a hand to stop you.

“Look, I don’t want to intrude, but if that guy tries anything weird…”

“It’s not like that,” you interrupted quickly. “He hasn’t done anything wrong. He just… invited me out.”

Miguel blinked a couple of times before frowning.

“And you said yes?”

“Yes,” you admitted quietly, avoiding his gaze.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“I just want you to be careful, okay? I don’t want to see you hurt. Not after… you know.”

His concern moved you, but also irritated you a bit.

“I know what I’m doing, Miguel. I’m not a kid.”

“I know,” he responded, his tone softer. “I just… want you to be sure about this.”

Sure. That was the issue. You weren’t entirely sure, but you didn’t want to pull away before figuring out what could happen.

...

The night arrived faster than expected, and in front of the mirror, you hesitated. The clothes you had chosen were simple, but still, you felt like you were about to do something forbidden.

When the sound of the door broke your thoughts, your heart skipped a beat.

Wolf was there, standing, dressed more casually but with the same confidence and presence he always had.

“Ready?” he asked with a crooked smile.

You nodded, casting one last glance at your son, who would stay with Miguel.

“Let’s go.”

The drive to the restaurant was calm, though you could feel his gaze on you from time to time. You didn’t talk much at first, until he decided to break the silence.

“You look beautiful tonight.”

You rolled your eyes, though a smile tugged at your lips.

When you arrived at the restaurant, Wolf circled the car and opened the door for you.

“Wow, quite the gentleman,” you commented playfully as you got out.

“Not always,” he replied with a smile, “but I think it’s worth the try.”

You didn’t know what to say to that, so you just shook your head and kept walking.

The restaurant was cozy, with dim lighting and a relaxed atmosphere. Despite the unexpected nature of the date, you were grateful he had chosen a quiet place. Once you sat down, you felt the initial tension begin to ease a little.

“So, you’re into karate?” he asked, resting his elbows on the table while looking at you with interest.

“Not exactly,” you replied, fiddling with the napkin. “Miguel loves it and it pretty much changed his life. I just learned a few things for self-defense when things got tough.”

Wolf nodded slowly.

“Always protecting him, huh?”

“Always,” you said without hesitation.

He fell silent for a moment, studying you with an intensity that almost made you squirm in your seat.

“And who protects you?”

The question took you by surprise.

You blinked a couple of times, turning your gaze to your glass of water as you tried to find an answer. For years, you had been so focused on taking care of Miguel, your mother, your grandmother, making sure they were okay, that you had never stopped to think about who did the same for you.

“I don’t need anyone to protect me,” you murmured finally, tightening your fingers around the napkin.

Wolf rested his chin on his hand, looking at you with that expression you couldn’t quite decipher.

“That sounds lonely.”

“That sounds like independence,” you replied with a half-smile, trying to lighten the moment.

But he didn’t smile. Instead, he kept looking at you with the same intensity as before.

“Is that what you tell yourself to avoid admitting that sometimes you need support too?”

You let out a short laugh, without humor.

“Look, don’t get me wrong, but we didn’t come here for you to psychoanalyze me.”

Wolf raised his hands in surrender, though he still had that half-smile on his lips.

“You’re right. I just like to understand the people I dine with.”

“And what have you understood about me so far?”

“That you’re strong,” he said without hesitation. “That you work too hard to hide when something bothers you. And that you probably don’t remember the last time someone asked you how you were feeling without expecting you to have all the answers.”

His words struck a sensitive chord with you. You didn’t respond right away because a part of you knew he was right.

And that scared you.

“Maybe. But you still don’t know me well enough to say it for sure.”

“Then give me time.”

That simple phrase made your stomach flip unexpectedly. Wolf didn’t say anything else, just took a sip of his drink as if the conversation hadn’t been so intense.

You decided to ignore the weight of his words and focus on the food, but the taste couldn’t distract you from the feeling of his gaze fixed on you.

“You’re too persistent,” you muttered, twirling the glass between your hands.

Wolf rested his chin on his hand, studying you with a barely visible smile.

“I don’t give up easily.”

“You think that’s what this is?” you raised an eyebrow. “A challenge?”

“Maybe. Or maybe I’m just interested in what’s behind that attitude of yours.”

His response threw you off for a second. There was no arrogance in his voice, just a calm confidence that made every word he said stay in your head longer than you’d like.

“There’s not much to see,” you said with a shrug.

Wolf tilted his head, clearly not believing you.

“I don’t agree.”

You rolled your eyes, but the warmth in your chest was undeniable.

“Really, do you always talk like this?”

“Only when someone interests me.”

You couldn’t help but let out a low laugh, unsure if he was being serious or just enjoying watching you react.

“Then you have a problem.”

“Or maybe I found something worth it.”

“Stop with that weird flirting,” you said, crossing your arms as you looked at him warily.

Wolf let out a low laugh, leaning back in his chair.

“Why? Does it make you uncomfortable?”

“No,” you lied, grabbing your glass to hide the warmth in your face. “It’s just… strange.”

“Strange because you didn’t expect it, or because you’re starting to like it more than you want to admit?”

You shot him a glare, but he just smiled with amusement, as if he was enjoying every one of your reactions.

“You’re unbearable.”

“You’ll get used to it.”

You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t stop the small smile that appeared on your lips. And by the way Wolf looked at you, you knew he had noticed.

“I don’t want to get used to it,” you grumbled, placing your glass down a little harder than necessary.

Wolf rested his elbow on the table, leaning slightly toward you.

“That’s what you say now.”

You looked at him with a mix of exasperation and… something else. Something you didn’t want to name.

“If this is a game to you, you’re trying too hard,” you commented, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s not a game.”

His serious tone took you by surprise. For the first time that night, his arrogant smile disappeared, revealing something more genuine in his gaze.

“Then what is it?” you asked, narrowing your eyes.

Wolf held your gaze for a few seconds before shrugging with a crooked smile.

“Something interesting.”

You shook your head in disbelief.

“You’re definitely unbearable.”

“And you’re definitely still smiling.”

You hurried to wipe any trace of amusement off your face, but it was already too late. Wolf had noticed, and by the way he looked at you, he seemed more than satisfied with it.

The dinner went by with light conversations and the occasional witty comment from Wolf, who insisted on making you smile, even though you weren’t ready to give him the satisfaction so easily.

For moments, you almost forgot who he was and what he represented.

“Are you not going to admit you're having a good time?” he suddenly asked, resting his chin on his hand while watching you with a subtle smile.

“Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“No need to. It’s written all over your face.”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help but laugh.

The food was delicious, and although you had been tense at first, you slowly started to relax. Talking to him wasn’t as bad as you had thought.

When the waiter took away the empty plates, Wolf interlaced his fingers on the table and looked at you with an unreadable glint in his eyes.

“We should do this again.”

Your heart gave a small traitorous skip. But instead of giving him a direct answer, you crossed your arms and raised an eyebrow.

“Don’t you have students to train?”

“Students?” he replied with a slight smile on his lips. “Of course, but I also know how to delegate. Sometimes one needs a little break, don’t you think?”

“Let’s finish tonight first. Then we’ll see.”

He smiled, as if he had won something with that response alone.

“Next time, we can go somewhere you can relax a little more. Maybe we could even bring the baby.”

You looked at him for a second, unsure if he was serious or just joking.

“Really?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.

Wolf leaned back in his chair, his gaze fixed on you as if he were evaluating your reaction. His smile didn’t fade, but softened slightly, becoming more genuine.

“Why not?” he replied calmly. “If we’re being honest, I’d like to get to know you better. And if that involves your child, then why not do it in a way that makes you comfortable?”

You were silent for a moment, weighing his words. Something in his tone, something in his attitude, made you feel like it wasn’t just a joke, that he was genuinely willing to make things easy for you.

“I didn’t think you liked the idea of interacting with a baby,” you commented with a slight smile, unable to not feel a bit of amusement.

Wolf shrugged.

“I’m not the kind of person who rejects kids without reason. Although I have to admit… I don’t have much experience with them.”

Your smile widened slightly as you imagined him trying to interact with a baby.

“It’s not that hard,” you said, softening your tone. “It just takes patience and a little tenderness. Something you seem to have in abundance when you want to.”

Wolf looked at you intently for a moment, a flicker of surprise crossing his eyes before his smile returned, the one that always seemed to hide something more.

“You think so?” he asked, playing with the edge of his wine glass.

“I do,” you replied, although you couldn’t help but let an involuntary sigh escape your lips, as if you suddenly felt a little more vulnerable.

You had spoken about your child so naturally, so fluidly, that it surprised you how easy it was to share such an intimate part of your life with him.

The waiter approached to ask if you wanted dessert, but you both looked at the clock at the same time. It was late, later than you had expected. Wolf nodded and paid the bill, and you both stood up from the table.

As you left the restaurant, the cold night air wrapped around you once again, but this time, it felt less heavy. The conversation with Wolf had been more… relaxed, more comfortable. For a moment, you almost forgot why you had been so reluctant in the first place.

Wolf walked beside you, his steps firm but calm. When you reached the car, he opened the door for you with the same courtesy as always, but this time his smile was different, as if something had changed.

“You know…” he began, his voice a bit lower than before, “If I’m being honest, I can’t help but want to kiss you.”

The air between you both became dense, as if his words hung in the space, weighing down on you. The tone of his voice was direct, but there was also a vulnerability in his eyes, as if he was genuinely waiting for a reaction, unsure how you’d take it.

Your pulse quickened, and for a moment, you were left speechless. Surprise mixed with a wave of conflicting emotions, but before you could articulate a response, he smiled slightly, a hint of amusement in his eyes.

“But… I don’t want you to take it the wrong way,” he added, as if trying to ease the tension. “I just… wanted to be honest with you.”

Your heart was still racing, but this time, it wasn’t just from surprise.

You looked him in the eyes, a silent challenge in your gaze, and in a low tone, almost as if you were daring the tension between you both, you said:

“Do it.”

The words left your lips without thinking too much, but at the same time, you felt there was no going back. A sigh escaped his mouth, and in the blink of an eye, the distance between you two disappeared. Wolf moved closer with tense calm, his fingers gently brushing your cheek before his lips met yours.

The kiss was soft at first, as if both of you were exploring this new dynamic, but the spark between you both quickly made the touch more intense. His hands wrapped around you, pulling you closer.

When you finally broke apart, both of you were breathing heavily, and a knowing silence settled between you. Wolf looked at you, his expression softer now, but with a smile that carried something unsaid.

“Now what?” he asked in a whisper, his voice deep, lower than before. The tone was serious, but also tinged with a certain insecurity, as if he feared that this moment might be something fleeting that couldn’t be held onto.

“I think you should take me home,” you thought, remembering Miguel and the baby. You didn’t want him to feel pressured, but you knew too much time had passed.

He looked at you with a slight smile, something vulnerable in his eyes that you hadn’t noticed before. However, he didn’t say anything right away. Instead, he leaned in just a little more, as if searching for something in your eyes.

“Are you sure you want to leave so soon?” he asked, almost as if afraid this was your way of pulling away.

“I have someone waiting for me at home, so yes.”

“Alright,” he said, his voice softer now, understanding the situation. “I’ll take you then.”

...

When you opened the door, the sound of laughter and a baby crying welcomed you. The house was softly lit, and the small figure of Miguel was in the living room, playing with the baby.

“Ah, finally!” Miguel exclaimed with a knowing smile, not losing his relaxed attitude. It seemed like he was enjoying his "dad" role more than he had imagined.

The baby in his arms was making strange noises, clearly trying to calm down as Miguel rocked him back and forth, making silly sounds.

“He missed you a lot, huh?” he said in a playful tone, glancing at you with a raised eyebrow. “Although it looks like I’m the one with the talent to calm him down, maybe I should be hired as a nanny!”

You walked over to the sofa where Miguel was, smiling in relief at his joke. The atmosphere was much more relaxed now, even if part of you was still caught up in what had just happened.

“Are you sure you won’t leave me alone for a second?” you joked while taking off your coat.

Miguel let out a small chuckle before responding, still holding the baby.

“Only if you stay and help me, because I don’t know what to do with this little one.”

Miguel looked at you from his spot on the sofa, the baby now in his arms, looking more relaxed. The small smile on his face faded for a moment, as if something had crossed his mind, before he asked:

“So… how was it with Wolf?” His voice was casual, but there was a slight curiosity in his tone. You knew he wasn’t trying to be intrusive, but deep down, his question carried something else. Maybe concern, or maybe just curiosity, but definitely not indifference.

“It was good, I think,” you responded, trying to stay calm but unable to stop a small smile from appearing on your lips. “It was a nice date. We just… talked. You know, nothing out of the ordinary.”

Miguel nodded, his eyes still fixed on you, but his tone softened.

“Nothing out of the ordinary, huh?” he said, a slight teasing smile playing on his lips, as if he were trying to read between the lines. “Don’t tell me you just ‘talked’. Did that include hugs? Kisses? Sweaty hands? Intense stares?”

You felt yourself blush slightly, knowing Miguel could make jokes like this to ease any tension, but you also sensed that his comment, though humorous, carried a hint of something more.

“Don’t worry,” you replied with a nervous laugh, trying not to give it too much importance.

Miguel studied you for a moment, as if weighing your words. Then he shrugged and smiled again, his attitude lightened.

“Alright… but if you ever need to talk about anything, you know I’m the expert in love and relationship advice, right?” he said in a joking tone, before adding, “Although I’m not sure my advice would be the best, considering my last date was with a dirty diaper.”

His joke made you burst out laughing.