#source: @trans-mom

[augment-techs]

T.J.: Work on your emotional control.

Andros: Get hit by a car.

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

TT: I went to the store with my mom and said I wanted the lesbian candle. TT: She looked at me and said, and I quote; MOM: u have enouhg lesbian shit already how bout getitng a gf for once thag's pretty lesiban to me TT: During pride month, too. Like, Mom???

TT: Can you guys stop rebubbling my worst moment ever?

[finchtheidiot]

Transfem spy and transfem scout - Spy is teaching scout about makeup (She's also telling her to shower more)

[red-eft]

having a trans parent sounds great on paper. you'd think it would be great to have a parent that is also transgender. especially one that transitioned in the same direction you're going now. you would think that parent would be supportive. however,

[moodr1ng]

ive been binging julia seranos online essays before bed and its definitely v good stuff thats bringing up a lot of new thoughts and connecting some dots in ways that i think i kinda had an understanding of but not rly a concrete and clear framework of, which is cool, but i think its also giving me weird ass dreams

[beegswaz]

ink saying the universe hates me as if i dont already know that 😭😭

[a-thread-of-green]

I've spent the last two weeks speedrunning coming out as a trans woman to my coworkers, extended family, and the assorted friends I'd collected through Facebook and I've been shocked and overwhelmed by how enthusiastically supportive cis women have been in particular. After doomscrolling through TERF shit for the past year, I'd become convinced that cis women tended towards distrust of trans women, with a significant percentage actively vitriolic. But, time and time again, I've received effusive praise from the cis women I come out to. Not just progressive women either: Christian Facebook-moms from Texas have been enormously supportive. I've gotten some support from cis men too, but nothing nearly as passionate, and they've been the source of all the awkward avoidance or disgusted looks I've experienced. It makes complete sense: cis women generally like being women, and most of them like it a lot, so why wouldn't they celebrate somebody else becoming like them? This really drives home how dishonest TERFism is: they present themselves as the voice of women, but really they're just a regressive minority, distorting the issues to lead people away from their inclination towards love and acceptance.

[paterklatter]

Please get off tumblr. You’re too young. People here are brainwashing you.

dickrider dickrider dickrider dickrider dickrider

[cutecipher]

Keep a Trans Family Housed

Unfortunately we are out of luck for rent this month, we thought some money was coming in but it hasn't happened yet. So please help us cover rent while we keep trying to get funding for the new internet we're working on:

If it helps I also invented a new image format this month that I'll be posting the source code for this weekend. Also we are @rickybabyboy s moms.

Cashapp: $cmder

Venmo: AGIEF

Paypal: agieocean@gmail.com

$786/$875 raised

Edit: we can get half covered by someone else when this is raised

[haobinsave]

엄마 엄마~저기저기~ ソンハンビン: お母さん👉🏻お母さん👉🏻あそこあそこ👉🏻 ジャンハオ: お辞儀してご挨拶 ハンビンご両親にジャンハオを紹介してあげてる、、、

tnmd_s2

[precuregremlin]

Honestly, I kind of want my Precures to have a time limit of how long they can be in hero form. More importantly, I want them to build this up over time. Mostly because the image of Akane doing his laundry and other house chores as Cure Flip to build up his time limit is hilarious. You know, totally doing my laundry as a bright pink superhero, nbd, oh shit mom’s home gotta change back to regular form.

This amuses me, so it’s canon.

[boy-gender]

im really glad we as the trans community seem to be drifting away from posts where some transphobic fuckwit asks a bad faith question about transness and we spend hours gathering sources theyre never gonna click and presenting explanations theyre never gonna read and instead now we're prioritizing our own mental bandwidth by just saying we fucked their moms. I love that for us and i think its a way better use of everyones time

[punkbarbarian]

for folks who don’t follow them on instagram— ally beardsley wrote part of an op-ed in the washington post for the 50th dnd anniversary about a moment playing dnd that really stuck with them and i wanted to share it here!

“a character’s journey — and my own”

I was an aspiring comedian in Los Angeles and had just landed a salaried job at the comedy website CollegeHumor. My co-worker and friend Brennan Lee Mulligan was looking for six comedians to create a show that would be like an at-home game of D&D. Why not? “Dimension 20” became a weird punctuation to my day.

I remember there being too many rules to remember. I kept turning to my friend, Brian Murphy, to ask which dice I should be rolling. I wasn’t paid overtime, but I loved the group and was having a lot of fun.

For the second season, I had my sea legs. I created a character for the campaign who was transgender. I had started going by the gender neutral they/them pronouns at work and among friends, but sourcing hormones or getting surgery seemed equal parts expensive and invasive. A fun thing about fantasy is stripping away the crunchy, real-world limitations and asking yourself: “What would I do if I could do anything?”

That season’s arc for my character, Pete, was extremely euphoric for me. I had described him as a trans cowboy you might see at Burning Man, and the artist drew him dressed as a freaky Hunter S. Thompson in an open shirt to show his top surgery scars. He has wild magic — uncontrollable and dangerous in the game mechanics — which we used to explore the painful chaos of leaving a family that doesn’t accept you.

Since then, I’ve started testosterone HRT and had top surgery. It’s funny to listen back to myself playing a character who had transitioned in ways I hadn’t. It’s full of inaccuracies that make me smile. Pete takes a testosterone pill every day; I now know it’s a weekly injection or a topical gel. I see my face, one wrapped up in playing something so new but instantly right. It was like an oracle. A near-future me who has health insurance! Who’s talked to their mom about being trans and even spent a week post-top surgery on that mom’s couch in Temecula, Calif!

As I started transitioning my appearance, seeing that in front of the camera felt raw. I was starting hormones, and my voice was cracking. Realizing it was all being recorded felt naked at times, but it has been really nice to talk to fans and friends about how important it is to see someone that looks like you taking a big risk on themself.

With Pete, it was really important to me to tell a story other than the dramatic lead-up to a medical transition. So we started with him having just gotten out of surgery, but that’s all you see of that process. Part of his backstory is that he doesn’t have a relationship with his transphobic parents, and before shooting the first episode, I felt sick to my stomach. I’ve been on a journey with my parents, and our starting place didn’t have much common ground. When my character meets with his father, it felt as though I was actually running into my own on the street.

Brennan could sense that discomfort, and as my character’s dad was about to call Pete by his deadname, Brennan shut the interaction down, surrounding his dad with bubbles that carried him into the sky. Magic is the power and freedom to manipulate your reality, and you can banish the awful voices in your life — let them swirl away into the air.

[transmechanicus]

this is. probably a very personal question.

Is it worth it? Transitioning? In spite of it all?

Completely, utterly, and absolutely. I’m one of those ppl who knew i was trans since i was like 8. I found out when i was probably 13/14 what transgender meant, but recoiled from it because i could not imagine a world that would accept me or where i would be happy with the result. At 15 i met my first other trans person, and they became my friend and partner and the first person to ever know i was trans. Being around them, known by them, was such a colossal psychological relief and source of joy unlike anything i had known before. It made separating from them after graduation all the more excruciating to lose that one person i had trusted with that truth.

Sometime over the next two years i came out to my Mom, but nothing really changed, and i had more or less resolved to rot and die under the identity i had been born into. I let my undergrad studies chew me up, neglected all but the most necessary body maintenance, and spent every moment outside work or class buried in video games or books. At some point something snapped out of place, or perhaps back into place. I knew i didn’t want to die like this. I wanted something more for my life and my flesh than being a half dead servitor stocking yogurt. I wanted to transition, and however slowly, however long it took, that’s what i resolved to do.

It took a while. I had no real finances, no privacy, and little independence. I was coming from a white low-self-expression, high-control household. I “messed up” while base coating warhammer models one time and gave myself black nails. My dad berated me about it for days before trying to pin my hands down and sand the paint off (didn’t work, thank you automotive primer). When i was ~22 i got my ears pierced, basically the first permanent part of my transition, and i had never known as much joy as i did driving home knowing the pain was a step of permanent progress. Around this time 2019/2020 i started being out online, more vocal about being transgender as opposed to just having a relatively inexpressive fandom blog with no info beyond my name.

When i was 24, two years ago i came out to my dad, and a week later i left for grad school halfway across the country. I had an apartment all to myself, and my own source of income. I spent my spare change building up a wardrobe of new clothes that i actually liked. I got my first year of grad school done mostly without anything remarkable. Went to some queer events at my school. Found a partner. Got loved to bits for a while. Re-came out to my parents over the summer, and this time it stuck. Started HRT that fall, 2023. Came out to my classmates and coworkers and was rewarded with support and acceptance. Lost the partner. Devastated. Resolve to get even hotter and cooler. Smash out 3 piercings and a tattoo inside a week. Develop personal fashion sense. Attend research conference. Get better at makeup. Go to some concerts. Increase HRT. Tiddy Arc. Buy bra with a supportive bestie. Start weekly therapy. Increase HRT. Cosplay at a major convention. Schedule another tattoo. More HRT. Bra no longer optional. Present day. Tattoo on Wednesday. 90% of progress packed into the last year or so. Undeniably hotter, happier, and more self-expressive than anything in the last 24 years prior.

Transitioning is more than worth it, it brings me so much relief and joy every day no matter how shitty my day is otherwise, and while i have known doubt, i have never for an instant known regret.

There is still time🖤🏳️‍⚧️💕

[vaspider]

Intro Post, updated January 16, 2025.

Due to the unfortunate level of scam requests I have received, I no longer reblog donation or fundraiser requests from blogs I do not recognize. Don't follow me just to submit a signal boost request. I notice, & I will just delete your ask and block you.

No, that doesn't mean I think you, personally, are a scammer. I just don't have the hours in my day to sift through the number of asks I get and verify them, so if I don't recognize someone from prior interaction, I just won't do it. Yes, I agree. It does suck that shitty people have made this necessary.

I post all other asks as they were submitted, with the exception of fundraisers from blogs I don't recognize. I answer at my whim and not upon demand. I will never honor requests to answer asks privately or anonymously. Anon is never turned on. These are hard self-care boundaries. Please block the tag "harassment tag" if you don't want to see to some of the horrible shit I get sent sometimes.

I will only reblog/repost/boost a given fundraiser once every 7 days. Period. Sending me more asks will not change that. If you only interact with me to ask for signal boosts, I'll just block you with no response. That is the only exception to my "post all asks" policy. I am a person, not a public resource. Don't make me feel used. It's exhausting.

If you like what I do, please consider hiring me, buying something from my company, NerdyKeppie, buying me a coffee, becoming a Patron or tossing some money in my PayPal tip jar. I am a disabled, queer, Jewish, non-binary butch, and those sources plus freelance writing are my entire income.

Here is the cast of many of the frequently-mentioned entities in my posts.

I will not debate my identity with anyone. I am a transmasculine non-binary butch lesbian, a cripple, a dyke, and lots of other things, too. You don't get a vote in that, and if any of those words are words you object to someone using in reference to himself, block me. I won't censor my identity for your comfort; it took a lot of hard work over decades to become proud of who I am.

ACAB includes gender/sexuality cops. You aren't the mayor of Dyketown or the burgermeister of Transberg, so fuck off.

Mom is a job title to me. I'm okay with being called Mama Spider, but no other feminine terms.

No, I am not an anti or an anti-anti. Leave me alone.

No, I won't DM you.

No, I won't answer your question about Israel.

No, I won't talk to you about I/P.

Nothing above the above two things means anything other than that I don't talk about those things online.

Don't project your shit onto me. I do not consent to being your straw man.

I will not perform Good Jew or Good Queer on demand, whatever that means to you in this instant. Fuck off.

Yes, I've been out for a very long time. No, I'm not interested in being lectured by people half my age over shit that happened when you weren't alive yet.

"Man bad/woman good" is regressive TERF/right-wing shit, it doesn't matter how you dress it up. Knock it off.

Curate your own experiences. If you don't like seeing what I write, then add 'vaspider' to your "filtered content" list, and don't bother me about it. Tumblr is a 17+ environment, and I am not responsible for you seeing things you don't like. My daughter and stepkid are both old enough to drink. I raised my kids. I'm not raising you or any other kids.

Anyone who tries to turn you on your fellow workers or trans people or queer people or fellow Jews is doing the work of fascists for them. Act accordingly.

My icon has lore, apparently.

I never answer asks privately and anon is never turned on.

[apollosimps]

they/them pronouns can be used to de-gender people. Queer people need to understand this.

I'll tell you a story to illustrate my point: my parents suck. They're conservative and think that the generational trauma they're inflicting on me is normal. They refuse to listen to my experiences. They've gotten violent before. I've had to flee my house.

Before I was ever outed as a trans guy, my best friend used they/them and identified as non-binary. They still do. I would say they definitely helped me sort my own shit out.

My parents knew about this, and they consistently deadnamed and misgendered them. They pulled out the "they is for multiple people, it's too confusing" card many times. This is one of the reasons I completely shut my feelings and emotions off from them, because obviously, blatant transphobia was not acceptable to me. I defended my friend openly and corrected them every time they would say "she". It got heated, sometimes.

Fast forward to when I was outed. My mom now suddenly insists that he/him is too hard for her to use, and that only NOW she can choose to use they/them for me.

This is de-gendering. I pass more nowadays ever since I started testosterone, but I'll hear a "they" coming from my boss at work even though he knows I'm a trans man, or even people in queer spaces when I have a he/him pronoun pin on me, clearly visible.

It's frustrating because now, my parents being assholes, I think I legitimately might have mild trauma sourced from being called "they" by my parents, who have actively humiliated and abused me ever since I came out.

So, I ask: please do not use they for people who have explicitly outlined otherwise. This should be simple. Apparently, for a lot of people, it's not.