#sorry to post this chronically like who gives a shit lol
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Telling myself to stop getting so antsy and excited and wait the full year that I’ve been back on the pill for it to fully take effect and regulate itself and then my body and appetite and brain are going to go back to normal lol
#I feel so ugly right now I’ve never felt so hideous in all my life honestly#the short hair is adding to it#my skin is clear now I’m just waiting for the old acne marks to go away so that’s nice#but part of me wants to switch over to spironolactone and stop the pill….#but the pill makes my periods so much better too like I get severe pain otherwise 😭#I just hate it I feel like it’s making me ugly#but also that can’t be true because in 2018 I was on it and that was my peak everyone was telling me I was beautiful#STRANGERS at the grocery store would tell me I was beautiful#GOD THOSE WERE THE DAYS#and still the boy I liked didn’t like me hmmmm sick and twisted let me tell you#I will say I do feel like my brain is going back to normal#I think there’s multiple contributing factors lol#I NEED TO CUT OUT CAFFEINE FULLY NUMBER ONE#sorry to post this chronically like who gives a shit lol
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I'm sorry but I fucking hate proshippers so much so here's a whole post dedicated to shitting on them
also disclaimer YES I will be tagging the proship and anti proship tags so I can piss off the chronically online basement dwelling idiots :) and idgaf if proshippers have trauma cause it's not an excuse for their shitty and problematic actions!!!! Sincerely if you are a proshipper please consider jumping off a bridge!! Or at the bare minimum take a shower cause ew
And this whole post is literally just bullying the FUCK outta them so idk stanky people come at your own risk lol
AND AGAIN to clear up this isn't like rage bait or smth cause I fell like some people will accuse me this is all my genuine hate into a long ass post so yeah
Okay...LETS GET INTO THE FUCKING RANT NOW HEHEHE HEHE HEHEHE!!!!
I FUCKING HATE PROSHIPPERS!!!! I HOPE ALL OF YOU STANKY ASS BITCHESS GET THROWN OFF A FUCKING CLIFF AND GET A SAW STYLE EXECUTION CAUSE Y'ALL ARE FUCKING DISGUSTING I HATE YOU ALL
YOU ARE MENTALLY ILL IF YOU ARE A PROSHIPPER, END OF CONVERSATION
I COULDN'T GIVE A SHIT IF YOU HIT ME THE "B-But I have trauma 🥺🥺🥺" TOO BAD THAT'S NOT A FUCKING EXCUSE FOR UR SHITTY ONLINE ACTIONS
IMAGINE YOU PULL UP TO A FUCKING INTERVIEW AND THEY SHOW YOUR PATHETIC ACCOUNTS SAYING TO NORMALIZE A 30 YEAR OLD DATING A 13 YEAR OLD, THAT SHIT IS GENUINELY PATHETIC
I KNOW IT'S CRINGEY BUT WOMP WOMP IF UR A PROSHIPPER Y'ALL ARE UGLY AND STINKY
But now on a serious not hehe, the reason I'm making this isn't JUST soley to yknow shit on people who are mentally ill like people who think a MINOR and a LEGAL ADULT are allowed to date, which comes into another thing before I get genuine so bare with me lol
I DONT GIVE A FLYING FUCK IF IT'S FICTIONAL, FOR THE LOVE GOD PLEASE SEARCH UP THE SLENDERMAN CASE WHERE THESE TWO GIRLS KILLED THEIR FRIEND CAUSE THEY THOUGHT SLENDERMAN WAS REAL AND THOUGHT THEY WOULD ENTER HIS KINGDOM AND BE WITH HIM, AND HE'S FICTIONAL, THAT CASE IS ALL Y'ALL NEED TO REALIZE FICTION CAN AFFECT REALITY AND I HAVE SM MORE REASON TO BACK THIS UP BUT I'M TOO LAZY TO TYPE IT OUT 😭
Okay! Back to seriousness I just thought I'd add that in as a little addition hehe >_<
So, like I said before, I lowkey just added this as an extra part cause I couldn't shit on proshippers FOREVER (lowkey bcuz I was running out of insults n threats lol)
Nonetheless I have a reason for shitting on them, although not being a proshipper EXACTLY I have been through I guess, similar paths as they have? Best way I could describe it ig, ofc not sharing what I mean since it's private but let's just say I was an unfortunate child looking at inappropriate comics 🙁
The reason for this part of the post...ITS NOT THAT FUCKING HARD TO STOP WHAT YOUR DOING
Like I said, I was never a proshipper, but I have been in similar situations as they have been, although I've never made an account glorifying rape, SA, grooming, pedophilia, I can just assume what I would do in their places
Dear proshippers,
Your probably complaining and not knowing why your getting so much death threats and harassment along with a side of hate (rightfully so you deserve them) and your mental health might be low
Please know it is your fault for making your accounts in the first place, you are a terrible person for saying all of these things such as rape, sexual assault, grooming, and incest are okay and you are not mentally well
And your probably wondering,
"How do I stop the hate, harassment, and probably death threats with even getting your address leaked?"
It's simple, DELETE YOUR FUCKING ACCOUNT, or even worse just turn off ur comments but that won't help with people slipping in a few people wishing death up in you through DMS
IT IS GENUINELY NOT THAT FUCKING HARD
I don't know what trauma you have but it shouldn't (and never in the first place) be SO BAD to the point where you physically CANNOT deactivate your account, IT IS SO FUCKING EASY AND YOU'LL SAVE YOURSELF A FEW SUICIDAL THOUGHTS
I know everyone one is different, but if you are a proshipper that has trauma, you shouldn't have a fucking account to begin with, and you ARE THE PROBLEM if you acknowledge the trauma, noticing you keep supporting and glorifying problematic actions, complain that you keep getting harassed and wonder why, and you just don't give a shit, not like in a "oh I don't know what to do anymore!!! 🥺🥺🥺" way, in a "oh, I don't give a shit I live for incest and adults grooming children!!!" Way, and ur also probably a pedo if ur an adult proshipper too
So, what else? Yeah, there's a shit more, but onto a better side, ones with actually good coping mechanisms!!
And a bit of a disclaimer, if your rage bait is proshipping, genuinely fuck you, and if ur a proshipper who acknowledges everything bad about it and just doesn't give a fuck, fuck you too and seek a rope to hang around your neck you fucking pedophile
Okay, coping mechanisms! I know this is probably not the best option due to most trauma which I'm guessing is probably from a family member, if it's not a good way to cope is some clean to your family, ofc under some circumstances it's NOT the best option, but if you can you definitely should try!
Also google is free yk...literally search up healthy coping mechanisms and it'll give you a huge ass list, and yet YOU STILL chose to ship a minor and adult together...how unfortunate...
Another way to cope is, and genuinely sounds pathetic as hell but bare with me...CHARACTER FUCKING AI, I mean, there are therapist bots so maybe they can help you??? And in all honesty they're really good at comforting and giving advice despite being ai, and I've tried it before...yeah embarrassed to say I've shed a tear every once in a while
And the last one IF you have the money, time, and generally the courage, book a threapy session, I cannot stress it enough, but I won't be surprised cause every proshipper is probably under the age of 16 years old
Yuhhh anyways that's all I gotta say, I know it's cringey asf but womp womp to proshippers I hate y'all despite giving some coping mechanisms and ACTUAL ways to like, stop the rightful hate you deserve lol
#my posts:3#anti proshipper#proship#proshipper safe#proshippers please interact#proshippers are valid#proshippers are welcome
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it’s me ur bbgrill tell me yuor 1-4 headcanons rn
gettin grilled by the bbgrill
Level 1!
hhhh i mean canon does not give much to work with imo
Firstly Lee and Gaara are massive shit talkers.
Lee got that chronic pain, dawg, like regular shooting pains and nerve issues but he doesn't say anything cuz he doesn't want anyone to worry or feel bad(👀Gaara *cough*)
Gaara ups his tai jutsu training (I think this is canon in filler lol) but Lee helps him out by sending over reference material all the time. The homies tell Lee that he's overdoing it but Gaara keeps and studies everything Lee sends.
Speaking of studying I think Gaara had to study hard for the bureaucratical aspects of the Kazekage spot. (Probably mostly shadowed Baki for a long time) Like strength is a given but he was totally on his own when it came to education and diplomatic stuff because he was pushed through the academy purely through fear and nepotism. Not to say he isn't smart, once he starts in on something he's similar to Lee in that he goes all in, it becomes a whole aspect of his personality.
Level 2 💥
Sorry but Gaara still has mood swings and struggles to regulate his emotions. He masks real well, king of compartmentalize and dissociate lol but mans lashes out sometimes. Especially before shukaku is extracted like he canonically is not allowed to sleep his neural pathways are fried. He does try to not let it on to anyone because it Freaks People Out for obvious reasons. (The gaalee here is that Lee doesn't gaf about moodswings because he is also TooMuch sometimes, just a very accepting guy so he's someone Gaara can be less under tight emotional control with and he tries to offer healthy outlets hiii gay thoughts and mushy feelings)
Also he cries way easily, sometimes he just chillin and he's like aw fuck not again, cuz the fatigue and stress manifests or just feeling generally overwhelmed(*references 1(one) scene in shippuden*)
Level 3 !
Gaara is a brat, a little shit, a bit of an instigator even. Lee is one of the only people who can really challenge him on his attitude when he's being a menace. Temari and Kankuro too but Gaara knows how to push their buttons too well loll
I mean the guy definitely misuse his authority sometimes (usually for the greater good but sometimes just to be sneaky)
Lee is spiteful and has a greedy streak in the sense that if he wants to go for something, he doesn't gaf if he 'deserves it' he'll earn that shit for himself and then rub it in your face but somehow be polite about it. Utilizes malicious compliance often.
Gaara is a picky eater, certain textures bother him and specific foods he just won't eat, he later explains to Lee that he's been poisoned a few times and even the smell of certain foods makes him feel violently ill as a result. It tasted fine when he ate it at first but his body remembers the pain and fear quite vividly. Lee goes out of his way to be courteous of this. Alternatively Lee will eat anything on principle of not being wasteful.
Level 4!! (The ones im slow cookin at all times)
HELLO RELIGION/CULTURE HCS Gaara gets into reviving old Suna traditions and sponsors more regular celebrations to rebuild a sense of community outside of the military state previous Kazekages had been building. (This wins over a lot of Old Head civilians because they remember when practicing and appreciating their religious figures was commonplace) In general Suna becomes a lot more colorful and lively especially in the years post war. Art and clothing and jewelry actually becomes a pretty decent trade asset. The regular big celebrations encourage more tourism, helps the economy and helps with their perceptions as this harsh, conservative village.
Also his Mom was from the aboriginal tribes of Suna and so getting connected with that part of himself feels like getting closer to her.
Lee Officially Courts Gaara following Sunan tradition (w/ lots of help from Tem, Kank, team Gai) in front of the whole village, my guy is a romantic and audacious af and really it sweeps Gaara right up off his feet.
Established relationship, Gaara is seriously outrageous with PDA, very much likes to flex his Lee because he didn't think he'd ever have anything close to a loving partner and Lee eats it up(blushing profusely). They're so gross and in love that whoever invites them anywhere will receive a formal warning about their behavior.
The sand sibs have a punk band together for funsies. It's mostly Kanks hobby, but post chuunin Baki shares a couple old man cd's with them and they just start banging out songs here and there to spend more time together and process their feelings in an abstract way.
(I project my gender onto Gaara a lil too; uses he/him cuz that's what everyone is used to but doesn't necessarily think of himself as anything specific genderwise, he was just a monster for twelve years afterall. Dabbles with feminity sometimes but doesn't think too hard about it.)
#gaalee#leegaa#hcs#almost none of this is new ideas but hey im a classic kinda guy#can you tell my favorite part is psychoanalysis#like damn what kind of mentally ill are they#i hope these are what you wanted uwu#i love yapping
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Ajkdlsld nobody asked for this extremely long misogyny rant but
😭😭 why is society so shit w rampant misogyny everywhere (most painfully, from other women) skkslsls. Reading the replies on that makeup post i reblogged and being chronically online in general is pissing me off lmao
Disclaimer: lol obviously this is all intersectional, like there are lots of ways in which I am extremely privileged (white/European/from a stereotypically desirable "educated, trustworthy, well-behaved, high tech" country/cisgender/able-bodied/neurotypical/privileged economic class etc etc). Doesn't mean the points outlined below don't apply to many women in relation to men who are in their otherwise same demographic
Things that I like about being a woman:
- my body (well don't always like it but don't want to change anything djkdkdj)
- being a lesbian
- being friends with other women (is easier) & not perceived as threatening by them in random interactions
- feeling "special" in some situations where i'm trailblazing or achieving something in a guy-dominated space, especially when other people point that out
- most interests i have/could think of having have no stigma attached to them that would make it difficult for me to pursue them. also corsets and ballgowns etc femme goth fashion pieces being societally 100% acceptable for me to wear in some situations and not even fringe
Things I don't like about being a woman:
- sexual harassment
- being talked over
- wage and employment discrimination
- basic misogyny shit like being expected to have children and take responsibility for all the people around you
- violent heteronormativity (obviously still hurts non straight men but hurts women more because the world feels so entitled to our bodies)
- having to worry about straight guy friends and acquaintances (esp classmates)' intentions (sadly its not stigmatised enough for people to be pushy w women so i get scared pre-emptively :/)
- SOCIETAL EXPECTATIONS FOR APPEARANCE AND COERCIVELY ENFORCED GENDER CONFORMING FEMININITY GRAAHHHHH going to kill every fashion beauty health etc company :) i don't care if doing it makes you personally happier or more confident you know where else conformity makes you powerful? politically oppressive dictatorships<3
- women friends (classmates) whose idea of girl talk is to alternately complain about and fawn over men through a sexual/romantic lens and evaluate them as potential partners, and who take my refusal to participate in this as personal rejection/rudeness and pull away from me as a friend because of it
- existence being political 24/7. no i cant ignore that its just always there
- dating (thats shit for everyone but there are specific annoying lesbian dating experiences such as: MEN EVERYWHERE not just unicorn seeker couples but he/him guys on women's apps, astrology truthers, people with bad haircuts HDJJDJD sorry i'm so mean i just hate the "berlin fringe" soooo much, etc.) and the chance that people you meet won't even take dating you seriously because society prioritises f/m so hard. its messed up because it presupposes unequal division of labour but i wish i could be like an esteemed jrr tolkien type 1950s professor and just be super in love with my wife with whom i'm settled down somewhere picturesque. But I don't think you can get a relationship like that as a queer woman because 1) obviously equality lol idk who even wants that and is not a tradwife 😭💀 2) most women who would like that probably don't think a female partner can give them that :/. Girlies literally be yearning for the masculine societal role because of the associated privileges
- Men being inherently perceived as "good guys" "chill" etc. in mixed academic/professional environments and always taken seriously intellectually, women seen in a more patronizing way/easily perceived as hysterical/a bitch/deficient in some other way
- men being praised to high heavens for doing the bare minimum vs women being always expected to be outstanding people by default
- pick me girl/not like other girls/etc discourse. This keeps happening and nobody ever learns that its dumb 😭
- men being seen as better deeper artists and male historical figures/intellectuals holding universal appeal whereas women rarely got to do anything interesting OR if they did they always get diminished and ignored (largely because media doesn't pick up these stories to highlight). none of you would care about crown prince rudolf if she had been a girl irl and i wouldn't either because often w female historical figures we're expected to care first and foremost about their romantic relationships with men💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 if girls have thoughts about foreign policy 1) they usually couldnt voice them before like 1900s 2) their entire existence and life story from cleopatra to margaret thatcher (yeah evil person but still) is tinged by misogyny from all sides (opponents, allies) which makes for pretty unappealing Content to engage with
- periods LMAO
- strangers feeling entitled to bump into me and get in my personal space (public transport etc)
- the way some feminist activism treats women as a monolith. like all that discourse about how society is not built for women's tiny fragile bodies. Like yeah important point ofc but I fucking hate being erased from existence as a tall woman. you bet if this was being done to short men there would be outcry
- in general people feeling entitled to me and receiving help and advice from me without giving anything in return. sorry i feel like this is just turning into a vaguepost abt classmates
- online queer discourse where there seems to be not a lot of space for this line of thinking that I have?? This is NOT intended as transphobic or even directed at trans people (rather the general community), but sometimes i feel like only trans people are ""entitled"" to hate their pre-transition assigned social role and everyone else has to like it because #girl power and otherwise it's just internalized misogyny or at the very least you misogynistically hating other women for being happy with their position/choices
- i'm tired of typing this is such an embarrassing post tbh
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Awww anon I hope you can feel the telepathic hug, I'm so sorry you are dealing with this :(
I hope you are okay with me responding to this (if not, I am happy to delete if you want me to) because I want to give you some advice and also help you maybe feel a little better. After all, I know you are not the only one who has been in this position recently and I think a lot of people can relate to you unfortunately. The environment on twitter with "ex fans" has become INCREDIBLY hostile and uncomfortable for current fans.
I get it and it can be tough to be stuck in a friend group where people are constantly making you feel paranoid and hated. And there are two things that I feel are important to think about during times like this:
You will not get along with everyone on the internet. It's a hard pill to swallow if you are a people pleaser like me but I think worrying about making everyone like you is such an exhausting endeavor that you shouldn't need to put yourself through. People will have their opinions and unfortunately, the internet is full of very chronically online people who love to fight and be vague and bitchy about things because they think they know how the world works when they don't. (and frankly if they are "hate following" people and pretending to leave the fandom but are staying and shitting on people, it doesn't sound like their minds will be changed anytime soon because they sound like obsessive haters- and what an absolutely MISERABLE life to live lol).
You are in a community of people who will support you and you always have the opportunity to make a better group of friends here- even though it may be intimidating at first. I think you'd be surprised at how easy it can be to make friends, especially on Tumblr just by interacting with posts and going into inboxes. I think it would be a great thing for you to get some new friends because I'm going to be honest: these people around you sound fucking terrible and not anyone you should be trying to keep relationships with. It sounds like you already have a mental strain on you with them constantly being around you and I think cutting them off will be so healthy for you. The superiority complex and the hating and fighting with other people and keeping tabs on people they don't like are all incredibly weird and surround you with a negative environment. You absolutely deserve better than these people <3
Never apologize for being on anon, I totally get it and I'm so happy you feel safe here and comfortable talking about this with me because I certainly understand. I hope to get an update from you soon that you are moving on to better people and better friends because they certainly don't deserve you :)
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im new here, so im sorry if this is a question youve answered before but tumblr's search bar failed me in finding this to be previous answered but.. uhmmm
c... can we make ocs/personas for Felt World? or would you rather we not or we hold off until further in?? bc i would love to make a puppet give our cowboy a smooch before he is, i assume bc he is a fucking catch and a half, taken off the market in canon lol i assume he wont still be single by the end. im a tad bit too embarrassed to ever post such drawings, but i wanted to know in case i ever did become brave enough to make them public if such you would be welcome to be tagged in or if that would make you feel uncomfortable
and also, for that purpose: as someone with disabilities, im really curious how disabilities are translated into Felt World? obviously not all of them, that'd take forever. but i was curious if they use mobility aids just like ours or if they use ones we could not have (an example of what i mean could be like "seal-chairs" in "Witch Hat Atelier"? they are chairs with hooves that run and jump, as opposed to wheels). and i know you said music is really powerful in this world, in both singing and instruments, but i wanted to also ask how in a world with so much focus on sound are the deaf/hard of hearing accomadated? deaf/HoH people can still play instruments, obviously (the most famous example being Beethoven), but i meant other than that
(also, if i recall accurately you once said that "the puppets have to speak to be considered sentient beings"? i was wondering if in the future could that be amended to "have to be able to communicate"? because i assume nonverbal puppets would still exist, as well as puppets who just dont speak much (whether thats a facet of deafness or nonspeaking shutdown or just a quiet personality). or would that break Felt World's world-building's logic in some way? that's a genuine question. i wasnt sure how to word it in a way that would minimize the risk of one being put on their back-foot, but i tried my best, it really is a genuine question)
(also, because i never like to assume fluency in disability-knowledge: if you need a resource on media portrayals of disability at any point, i highly recommend the youtuber, Oakwyrm. they do a lot of really cool analysis videos on disability. i do apologize if i am overstepping, and you are already largely fluent in disabled portrayals in media and/or already aware of Oakwyrm's existence. i just like to shout at least one resource out because i know many people have no idea where to look to learn more about general disability representation advice and whatnot. you do not have to watch their videos if you do not want to ♡)
also a bit of a tangent, idk if this is just a "for now" aspect of Donna due to her adjusting or if this is a core pillar of her personality but... just, thank you for making a feminine character who cries a lot and is emotional with Big Feelings. ive always felt more connected to the Dorthy Gales, Cinderellas, Clarisse de Cagliostros kind of heroines who are a bit of a "damsel in distress" (tho i do think that term reduces a lot of their agency and bravery) and i feel a bit lonely that we dont see many emotional-vitality-driven heroines who need some help as much as badass heroines or sassy heroines, both of whom are fully capable of getting shit sone alone. makes my cry-baby disabled ass feel a little pathetic (im very physically weak because of my chronic health issues, and am the type of Autistic ADHDer who is very sensitive to getting big feelings), even tho i know those types of heroines are valid and needed. i resonate a lot with AJR's lyric about "But I'm weak. And what's wrong with that?" even though i know im taking it out of context
and im sure Donna will prove herself capable of being on her own and having her own agency, same as all the heroines ive listed, i dont assume she will be stagnant, but i just wanted to really thank you for making a character that i relate to. i dont get that often. it makes me feel a bit abnormal and strange, and i mean moreso than the "well youre neurodivergent and sickly" kind of abnormal that would be implied. like. Weird Kid sitting alone at lunch kind of strange. so its really cool to see Donna and feel less lonely, is what im saying. i wish there were more heroines like her for people like me nowadays, rather than the archetype being reduced to "archiac stereotypes" (which i both do and dont understand the logic of. it depends on context and the example given) and therefore shelving a type of heroine we dont see in a lot of contemporary media (in exchange for a heroine we didnt get to see often (if at all) in past media, the sassy and badass ones, i do get it, and im glad theyre being used more as they should have always been. there are a select few of both camps that feel like "women have to be as stereotypically masculine as possible to be worthy of being called 'a strong character'" when i think strong characters have less to do with personality and more to do with "do they direct the narrative's plot? do they have agency?". but i could be wrong about that and i am getting off-topic)
but yeah. just. overall: thank you for introducing Donna to be like she is. it means a lot to me to see a heroine like her in contemporary media. im really excited to see what youll do next ♡ but yeah, i know im babbling a lot here and you dont need to reply to this half, i just really wanted to stress my thanks and WHY you have my thanks ♡♡♡ i really appreciate having Donna sit at my metaphorical lunch-table with me, even if she has to go sit somewhere else later. its been really nice to be beside her
thank you ♡
ps. i wasnt sure how to format this Ask because i know some people like to have each section have their own Ask for compartmentalizing/tag-organization reasons, but others like it all to be together so they know its all from one person as opposed to the anxiety of "ahh why did i get so many Asks all at once, did i do something wrong, do people hate me-- oh. its fine. i went through that rollercoaster for nothing. dear lord, am i drained now". so i tend to rather assume the latter, just in case; but do feel free to screenshot and section these out into their own posts if you are the former, i wont mind if youd rather do that ♡ have a nice day!!
Oh my goodness what a long message!!! 0.0!!
I had to take a few hours to think about everything to make sure I answered everything. But I should start off by showing my gratitude for the amount of time and effort you put into formulating this! So thank you, this was a really cool ask to receive <3
As for OCs, absolutely you can! I've already had a few who've made theirs, and I have no rules at all when it comes to shipping or self inserts or anything, as long as everyone is being respectful towards each other ^^
As for the disability aspect, I have a few key points that I want to explore in regards to especially deafness and muteness (is it called that? muteness?), but that's further along the story and will be introduced later! Also how song vs instruments work in this world is a part of the lore itself that'll be explained further down the line too, so no need to worry about our fellow mute or deaf/hoh peeps!
I have of course thought about mobility aids and other disability accommodations (because they can be born with defect, illnesses, and be injured pretty much like us, their bodies are a bit more fantastical but there are still rules) but i must admit didn't think further other than to give them similar mobility aids that we use. But clearly it would make more sense to make something more fantastical! I'll give it a thought! That's probably gonna be a fun design exercise ^^
I'm not sure if I can answer the entire ask in a way that does it justice, it's quite frankly the coolest message I've gotten, I'm gonna try and not let it get to my head (lol),
but i'm so glad you and seemingly many others seem to like Donna and appreciate her specifically for being sensitive and reacting strongly. It shouldn't be but it's really daunting to write female leads because as we know people just don't like women in media generally, but I eventually just got over it because I realized I was starting to write a character that demanded the audience cared and respected, rather than showing a story that I had fun telling, in a world worth exploring.
And not to spoil but I've already decided I do not want Donna to go through an arc where she's forced to abandon her emotions or go through something physically traumatic in order to "become tough" to be respected, that's not only overdone but lame and harmful wish fulfillment. So no worries in that department!
But anyways, I don't think I can properly say how appreciative I am of this ask!!! It really warms my heart that you and other people are going out of your way to send me asks about my little story that I came up with on a whim!!! It's truly the best compliment as a creator.
<3
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wanna talk about your OCs I would love to hear about your OCs who are they 👀
Oh dear. Sorry I forgot I hadn’t posted this it was in my drafts lol Doing my historical OCs because, well. I wanna and I feel like if I delved into any of my fantasy/sci-fi ones we’d be here ages
Fred Norefleet.
Of all the naval and broadly maritime ocs I have conjured over the years, he’s the most pathetic. By god is he trying his best, but he has continuously come up short in everything he’s done. He tries so hard and his life until recently was just other folk deciding what he was gonna be for him. He’s silent unless spoken to, tends to miss the forest for the trees, stares at you really intently when you’re talking, wishes more than anything to disappear into the background and his first words were probably “I’m sorry.”
That being said, he’s deeply loyal and supports his sisters and uncle financially with his wages. He’s a prime navigator and very detail-oriented, a team player and quite sneaky when need be and might actually make a lieutenant if he didn’t have a spine made from celery. He’s also quite sensitive about his lack of any formal education, receiving the good chunk of it when he became a midshipman. Quite protective, especially after the wreck as a kid. Became a bit of a chronic helper and control freak after that. Absolutely shit at fighting but an excellent sailor. Once dug shot out of his own hip, made it into a coin and carved a ship on it to give to his Friend. He’s that kind of person. He’s trans.
Morwenna Norefleet.
If Fred’s first words were “I’m sorry” then Morrie’s were “WASSON MATE.” The older of the twins by a minute, she and Fred were stuck together like glue until he went away to sea. She taught herself to read by studying the Bible and writes regularly to her brother. As both of them swapped names and gender, they’re quite close. She wants to open her own public house and inn or at least buy one (all the papers in Fred’s name of course). She’s a total flirt, especially with the out of town tinners and any “foreign” sailors (upcountry), even though she’s never settled down what with the whole trans thing. Morwenna embroiders very intricate flowers and landscapes. She once tried to do a ship for her uncle and it was less of a ship than it was a box with sticks. When Fred wouldn’t speak after his shipwreck and time spent stranded when they were 11, she felt really hurt. Especially when he went away to sea the same year, she was really lonely and would often sit in the St Juliot’s graveyard and cry privately. Nowadays she’s alright! Constantly worrying about her brother but also, she’s looking after her other sisters and their children and her uncle and working in an inn and working in the pilchard cellar. Her hevva cakes are amazing. She’s the strongest person in this family, has a deeply rooted sense of self and has boundless self confidence without ever being arrogant. Community and family are what’s important to her most of all, she teaches what she knows of Cornish to her little family members and teaches them to write and read and once hit one unruly patron so hard he woke up crying.
Callum Tredwen.
A mess. Is actively being hunted down by his own brother, is an ex-navy lieutenant, a mutineer and now smuggler. He’s on a suicide mission. He’s a lesbian and has an extremely doomed and unspoken relationship with his first mate. He’s probably committed multiple war crimes, he took a 21-year old doctor hostage and kidnapped him. He ought to be dead but he just won’t die. He’s a dick. An asshole. He’s all the confidence of Morwenna but without any compassion for others (lies, he does, he just rarely acts on it), the anxieties of Fred without any of the perspective. He hits first to avoid ever being hit himself. He refuses to let himself be loved or taken care of. He’s gotten his dearest friends killed and his own self maimed. This man wants blood and he’s going to get it, whether it’s his own or someone else’s. It’s been years and his gender is still “eeeeh.” The 2nd messiest fucker.
#sorry it took so long#morrie is the only one doing Okay here#like yeah she’s got problems#but tbh she deals with them better than the other two#Tredwen and Fred interacting is so fucking funny to me#they couldn’t be further apart and yet share so many similarities#I love Morwenna though she’s so fun#she’s having her own adventures while Fred is having the worst time of his damn life. boys about to punch in his final card ya know?#she’d KILL him a second time if he did tbh#go to the underworld and drag his ass back up to kick his ass and hug hi#she’s a good sister!#she and the uncle are BFFs it’s great#I can’t write cis characters they all become trans or some flavour of queer#my BOYS (and GIRL!)#thanks for the ask!#ask#oc
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Sorry to be in your asks again about this 😭 but I love your posts and the resources you've got
How the fuck do you cope with not feeling punk enough as a disabled person
Not having the capabilities to actually go out and get involved in your local community and scene, not having the coordination to fix up or make your own clothes
I know it's mostly about philosophy and not (entirely) how you dress or what concerts you can go to, but it's so hard to not feel like I'm failing at being punk when I can't make my own battle jacket or go volunteer with how exhausted I am just from existing 😭😭😭
First, don’t be sorry! I love getting asks (I actually have a lot that I need to get through 😬)
I feel like in order for my answer to have any real meaning, you need some background on me and my life, so I’m going to put a cut so this isnt the longest post known to man lol
Okay, for anyone new, I need to point out here that I approach all of this from a chronically ill perspective. I’m not physically disabled, but I’m certainly not fully functioning by any means. Okay on to the actual answer:
You ask how I cope with not feeling punk enough without being able to get involved in a local scene and dealing with the realities of chronic illness.
When I was in highschool (mind you this was like 7 years ago), I was just starting to get into punk. I was enamored by it. But I grew up country. I was the kid that wore jeans and a flannel every day. To this day I own cowboy boots and a few hats. I still listen to country music when Im sad. So I was a country kid who wanted to be a punk rocker.
My friend group in school thought that was absurd. I was 16 when it first came to my attention that maybe I couldn’t be punk enough. At this point I hadnt even learned the first thing about what punk really means besides ‘sticking it to the man’. My friends, no my best friend at the time, she looked at me and said ‘You arent punk.’ Then she scoffed and went on her merry way. I was sad, I was hurt, but more so I was angry.
I actually stayed friends with her until about a year and a half ago. During that time, I learned everything I could about what it meant to be punk. I cut my hair off, I had a jacket with a few pins on it, I listened mostly to alternative music. But I could never really sew (Im still shit at it and stab myself every time I make an attempt at it), I never listened to the right bands, I never word the right clothes, I didnt go to the right school. Nothing I ever did was going to be ‘punk enough’ for her. Through out most of that time, I was a baby punk who had never met another person in the punk scene. And through out all of that time my supposed best friend never thought I was punk enough. (God this person is honestly a story in and of itself)
But when I went to college, I met new people. And to these people, I was the epitome of punk (mind you their experience with alternative people was basically zero because I went to a christian school). That was a new experience for me and gave me a lot of confidence. I still wasnt around punks, but the girls in my dorm would hear me playing Papa Roach or Falling in Reverse and see me in a band shirt and either avoid me or tell me I was pretty cool. I still didn’t have an actual punk jacket. I didnt know how to sew. I just liked music and was wearing a nirvana shirt I got on sale at walmart.
I tell you this to point out that simply changing my environment, neither of which were full of alternative people, drastically altered my view of myself and if I was ‘punk enough’.
I’ll even give you another example to think about. Is a chemist still a chemist, even when they aren’t surrounded by or doing research with other chemists? If someone likes chemistry and knows a lot about it, but are surrounded by business people, are they not still a chemist, even if they arent the ‘perfect chemist’? I’ll go even further, making your own capillary tubes out of glass pipets is a very common and almost expected skill that most chemists have. I’ve never been successful at this once, does that make me less of a chemist?
You can still be a punk even if you aren’t surrounded by punks. You can still be a punk even if you cant do all the things that are typically expected of punks. Not all punks have the same skill set. Some can sew, some cant. Some can garden, some cant. Some can make graffiti stickers, some cant. Dont try to fit yourself into this box of what punk is ‘supposed’ to be. Punk is whatever you want it to be.
And I know, I know. Theres a difference between knowing that and feeling that. I completely understand. And thats part of why this blog has been so important to me. Like I said, I live in a very rural place. There are no punks. I know a grunge kid and a few teenagers who like to dye their hair. Sure, I live near Pittsburgh, but going into the city isnt a daily occurrence for me. But on tumblr, I’ve met some really amazing punks like @/polyamorouspunk and @/my-chemical-ratz. There is a pretty awesome online community of punks. These people have made me feel welcomed and included in this community, and I’m very thankful for that.
And even if you just want to look at the chronic illness/disabled perspective… your existence is punk. You are here, and you arent being quiet about it. Thats punk. “In the face of extermination say fuck you” may have been aimed at trans people, but it applies just as much to sick and disabled people. You are punk by default.
#mail tag#personal#i hope this helps in some way - I’m sure its not necessarily the answer you were looking for#but its the best answer I have#i cope with not feeling punk enough because i know theres no such thing as not being punk enough
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1, 3, 4, 6, 8, 9, 10, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 22, 24
choose violence ask game (life series edition)
oh my god, this is gonna be a bit long lmao, bear with me
1. the character everyone gets wrong
tango, i have rarely seen people get him just right. he's one of those characters that unfortunately gets molded into whatever the fandom needs him to be. dont blame them, i can admit i also struggled to have a good grasp of his character at first
3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr
i saw someone rant about how scott and cleo were just merciless bullies against pearl. which yeah, they were pretty mean to her, but the person didn't even attempt to understand scott and cleo's motivations. i know it doesn't seem much, but as someone who has a passion for that series's characters and their motivations it pissed me off that they were just ignored
4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?
the person from the question above lol. i rarely block accounts (unless they're bots), but the post i mentioned had very disgusting vibes
6. which ship fans are the most annoying?
solidaritek shippers who talk shit about flower husbands. and the opposite too, but i've seen that one more. let jimmy be loved by two people for fuck's sake!!
8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about
"dogwarts were the good guys actually" NO THEY FUCKING WERENT. watch the crastle or jimmy and scott (especially those two), dogwarts tried to forcefully take over all groups at one point. im not saying they were evil, they had understandable motivations...but that doesn't make them "good". i think this opinion popularized as pushback from "desert duo are the good guys" opinion (which is also wrong lol)
9. worst part of canon
the limited life ending, im sorry. not because martyn "played dirty", if anything that made the ending way better than it would've been. but the lead up from all three final perspectives were a bit underwhelming
10. worst part of fanon
sometimes people give too much power to the watchers to the point they take away autonomy from the characters. they are WATCHERS. they watch, not play. yes they put the players in the situation, but the players themselves are the ones putting the show
13. worst blorboficiation
i dont know if worst, but lizzie. she tends to be very dumbed down and infantilized. as if she didn't kill as boogey multiple times by making people trust her. dont get me wrong, she is chronically confused, but she is not a sweet innocent angel too fragile for this world
14. that one thing you see in fics all the time
i really dont know anything about hermitcraft so there might be a reason for it, but i see a lot of fics that make that server the "safe haven/place of healing in between life games". i dont really watch hc, so whenever i see it in fics and they reference stuff from that server i go ???. not complaining of course, i just try to pick up the context clues and use the general fandom knowledge i gathered through osmosis
15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time
y'know, i still don't know what those things that people put on pearl's head are. they look like bunny ears, or two feathers sticking out. something i also see a lot is all the winners in stained glass windows, sometimes in a "Hall of Winners". i dont know where it came from, but i eat it up every single time, i love it
16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)
not a fan of romantic smalletho. i tried, the idea of them is fun, but they're just besties in my brain
17. there should be more of this type of fic/art
ender skizz!! his 3L red skin is so iconic. also more team best as superheroes. they called themselves the heroes of the server, dress them up as that
18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...
i dont see people referencing cleo's almost death by tree suffocation on the first episode of third life, even though they were so many perspectives of it. narratively, it was the first time that they saw death as a possible threat. outside of the story, it was so fucking funny. they were all chilling and suddenly, tree
19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...
i'll be honest, im not the biggest smut fan. i'm not against it, but i dont really get the appeal. i won't turn away an E rated fic if im interested on the concept of the overall fic, but i dont actively search them. i will say...treebark smut is always so well fucking written. the love, the devotion, the yearning, the desperation, the craving. treebark enjoyers can write a good sex scene, and you can quote me on that
22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores
bigb was jealous of ren and martyn in double life. he says it, out loud, multiple times. there's so many angles you can go with this and so much potential. there's the treebark angle of course, but there's also how bigb used that to avoid responsibility from having a secret soulmate behind ren's back. tbh ren and bigb's relationship overall is way too ignored for literally being the most interesting soulmate pair
24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse
a bit more overall mcyt than life series fandom, but any boundaries discourse, especially shipping for some reason. i have a lot of opinions, but overall i think we should stop fucking talking about "boundaries" so much. boundaries assumes a two-way interaction. and unless i am tagging the cc or putting stuff on their chats/comments or on knowingly frequented tags, what i am posting does not need their permission. does that mean "post everything, have no morals"? fuck no, but that is really the responsibility of each person. if i don't think something should be posted on the internet, i won't do it. if i see people posting that stuff, i will mute/block/report (if needed). you know what we shouldn't do? bring attention to uncomfortable shit to ccs when they are live (aiming this directly to the 2 donos in the last couple of weeks that have asked scar what his boundaries on shipping is, which he either truly doesn't understand or is purposely avoiding to reply). anyways, always causes rancid discourse and at worst full on witch hunts for shit that really doesn't matter
#this took forever but it was fun. anyone else is welcome to send some of the other questions :D#also take nothing personally. i love this series but it is indeed just a silly block game#trafficblr#life series smp#trafficshipping#discourse#.ask game.#.anon asks.
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rae im sorry i just need to rant and i feel like youd get it but. god this is like the 50th time ive come across a post trashing atyd’s characterization of sirius, calling him extremely sexist or misogynistic for going out w so many girls??? saying hes repulsive, “barely held back puke every time he spoke” “im so glad i never read that shit” like ??? idk the unfair amount of scrutiny this fic gets makes me so mad. just bc something doesnt ascribe to your personal characterizations doesnt give you the right to start bashing writers left and right all over the internet. breaking news: flawed characters exist! that doesnt make the writer or writing “problematic”! not to mention all the gross ableist comments ive seen regarding remus’ emotions and actions surrounding his disability lol or all the “why is he so angry all the time” comments idk babe u try living as a poverty ridden orphan, second class citizen w chronic pain to boot, lets see how u like it. its. literally so easy to just . Stop reading a fic if you dont like it!
u are welcome 2 rant 2 me abt this any time <3 it frustrates me too honestly i just click away or block anyone who i see reducing the character to "ewww he was sexist!!" bc i think it demonstrates either an inability or an unwillingness to engage with literature beyond a surface-level glance and also a tendency to virtue signal on the internet for attention. neither of which are necessarily morally corrupt but both of which are annoying so i don't want 2 deal w it lol
like if a character is behaving in ways that are sexist "ew this character is sexist" is just about the most boring take u can have. anyone who reads the story can understand that this character is behaving in ways that are sexist; some interesting questions to ask about that are:
- why does he behave this way? what cultural influences and personal feelings are contributing to his actions?
- how do those around this character respond to his behavior? what does that tell us about them? about the world the story is set in?
- how aware is the character of his behavior? does he understand why he acts this way?
- does the character change or grow? why or why not? what influences him to regard his behavior differently? what enables him to ignore his own bad behavior?
- how does this behavior contribute to the narrative? does it help drive plot points? conflicts? does it set up or contribute to character development? how does it tell us things about the pov character [remus] based on his reactions to the behavior?
- how does this behavior challenge readers to think? are you meant to sympathize with this character in the instances where he is behaving badly? what does it mean about the readers' own self if they sympathize with a character who sometimes behaves badly?
honestly i think that everyone could benefit from those discussion questions at the bottom of english textbooks like....we are all supposed to be making those discussion questions in our own head when we read. if somebody doesn't understand that then either someone has failed them somewhere in their education or they are still in the process of learning how to read critically--which is like....fine. but again i just personally don't want 2 have 2 deal w it lol
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i personally don’t care what influencers or celebrities say about any social or political issue most of them are dumb and don’t know what they’re talking about, but tbh i understand where people who want them to speak up are coming from obviously no one is expecting influencers or celebrities to actually go fight in the war and stop it lol it’s about spreading the word using their influence to spread information about what’s happening most of us don’t watch the news but we watch YT and insta stories and tiktoks etc they have an insane amount of influence that’s why brands pay them thousands and thousands of dollars (millions if they’re celebrities) just to talk about their products for 3 seconds lmao and people want them to use that influence for something good for once instead of always selling us shit we don’t need. remember when Taylor Swift influenced 2 million people to go vote just because she posted one insta story! so asking them to speak up about important issues can lead to positive outcomes because of their huge influence on society, i personally don’t care but i completely understand why people want them to speak about it, it’s really not that crazy
respectfully, that's the problem tho. idk how old you are, so i don't want to come across rude or anything. but a random entertainer's job is not to inform you on the news going on around the world. do your own research. sure, snc talking about palestine would bring *maybe* a couple more eyes to it. but you would also have to be living under a rock to not know what's happening in gaza. you would have to be purposefully ignoring what's happening over there to not know what's going on.
not to mention, but it's not even the only genocide taking place rn. but it's the only one fans are demanding they speak on.
and i don't expect anyone to use their voice. if you can, you should. but as for content creators, idc what they have to say on international news. snc aren't political commentators. if they were, then i would get telling them to talk about palestine. but they aren't. and it's not even about smarts. most ppl, educated or not, can understand a genocide is a bad thing. but again, no one should rely on content creators for news.
how about we word it like this: if a cc had a musically account, don't expect them to be cnn. sound good? lmao jk
and actual celebrities are a lot different than content creators. taylor swift is known globally which is why her word matters. she reaches ears that snc couldn't reach in their wildest dreams. that's why her saying something matters to some extent. but even then, if ppl don't want to speak on a topic, they don't have to.
i get to some degree why fans want snc to say something, but i think the issue i have is that this is SUCH a chronically online take. who the fuck is requesting snc say something? twitter fans???? the same ones that bitch every other day about snc's gfs. rrrriiiiiiigggghhhhhttt. respectfully to them, idgaf what they have to say on anything, but especially world news.
and like i've said before, a lot of this is clearly misplaced anger. ppl's real anger is with our government giving our tax dollars to fund the idf. but it's easier to bitch at a random content creator to say something, as if in the grand scheme of things that's gonna change anything currently happening.
(also sorry if i come across rude in this. none of that is directed at you anon, this is more towards the general fandom getting on my nerves once again)
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'Sometimes not even that deep down' honestly between the qatar world cup and saudi sportswashing discourse, it's kind of shocking how comfortable and bold football fans are being with their anti-arab racism. and most of them are people who consider themselves to be progressive. it makes me wonder if it has just lain dormant in them for the past two decades and now they have an 'acceptable' context in which to let it all out. icl it's kind of triggering sometimes lol and makes being an online football seem seem like less of a safe space. it's one of the reasons why i honestly want to stop being online. some of these people probably have known zero arabs in their lives and are making blanket statements about arabs based on what they have learnt about sportswashing on twitter like "oh saudis don't respect women!" like okay do you even know any? as a woman walking alone at night you'd be safer on a saudi arabian street than your average european or american one probably. hdjdfskdf sorry for ranting but as always you get it
it's islamophobia anon. It's real and literally the majority of non muslim don't give a single shit about, I'm sorry if I'm so straightforward but it's true. We cancel muslim players all the time when they do something problematic as aboukhlal has been canceled and that's because us muslims in the first place feel all the pressure to distance ourselves all the time and it gets so tiring. All the players who showed support to depay's post or even made their own delirious post, how long the outrage lasted? they are all back onto my dashboard. I just don't understand the double standards and it's real, it's not something my mind is making up like.
They consider themselves progressive until it's time to call out their own bullshit. Like the way psg is treating mbappé is not an excuse for you to shit on non western countries. Do I think he has all the right to leave free agent and respect his own contract? absolutely, what are contracts even there for otherwise? but like, do they follow football, clubs don't like to lose footballers for free, and all clubs get mad if they don't get their own players to renew. and it's mbappé we're talking about lol. Sometimes they get their players to renew so they don't leave for free - which I'm not saying it's right, I'm saying it's not about mena doing business lol. Do people think that football is ruined now that Saudi is stepping their game up? Only now? I live in a western country that has chronically dealt with scandals and corruption every couple of years even back in time when top clubs were managed by rich italians. What Saudi is doing now - it's a reflection of what has been done in europe since the second half of the last century. Sure there are bigger amount of money involved now and sure it's upsetting, but I don't like and I don't accept that people are now waking up about it when a non western country is trying to get the spotlight too. Like you're not even trying to hide it are you. Nah sis I just can't deal with this
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I posted 3,855 times in 2022
That's 3,609 more posts than 2021!
648 posts created (17%)
3,207 posts reblogged (83%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@proudfreakmetarusonniku
@ruffboijuliaburnsides
@phantoids
@journal-number-3
@las-nevadas-corporate
I tagged 1,355 of my posts in 2022
#lr likes your art - 182 posts
#dsmp - 75 posts
#ua reblogs - 47 posts
#lehhohgoeszoom - 34 posts
#cdc reblogs - 29 posts
#cw food - 29 posts
#haha - 27 posts
#yeah - 27 posts
#passing ships - 27 posts
#creb - 26 posts
Longest Tag: 137 characters
#you know i don’t remember what an ost is but there are many people who go by ranboo and followers knowing your music taste isn’t atypical
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
@americans how many blazes are you getting???
i see a lot of post complaining about blazed posts but im in australia so ive gotten literally like none
15 notes - Posted September 26, 2022
#4
you know i rewatched the whole minecraft bu the sky is eating the world thing where mr soot kept saying that he was being an iron slut
i am beign a whore for copper. i need more fucking copper. 64 of those only translate to 7 blocks (and there should be an extra one but there isn;t because... maht?)
listen I have this massive room and it’s made of snow. and copper.
16 notes - Posted August 31, 2022
#3
“At this rate I see literally no difference between kicking your ass out of the balcony and not.” oh my god.
this is the bullshit that keeps my love of centricide going
how would one describe centricide, genuinely? EDIT: oh my god I am so sorry I forgot to mention this is a quote from the politi-girl fanfic series on ao3 sorry for forgetting to give credit to @politigirls on ao3
19 notes - Posted July 7, 2022
#2
you know, with all this reboot stuff, i just want to say that the ccs... idk, i feel like they dont completely get how funky the fans are. they’ll be real upset that you tore away the plot and characters and storylines they drew to love with a potential of everything failing more, and many will pull away
but even more so, i think many will stay.
im not sure if they realise that dsmp is really important to a lot of people, and how upsetting it would be to have it torn away after waiting and being paitient, endless fan content and community based around a plot that essentially got “Abandoned Work: Unfinished or Discontinued” slapped on it, but its important enough that even when you mock your fans for being there, even when you fuck them over, etc, etc, they will still watch because it was so good and they care enough and hope enough that theyll keep going until you reach really really shit
yeah lol. idk man
25 notes - Posted July 10, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
for me specifically as a teenager who has asthma, i just. maybe its just me, but i swear it can’t be. asthma is this frustrating creature who you get very sick of very quickly. when i have an asthma attack, i might be experiencing like. physcial struggle to breathe but cognitively im just annoyed and tired, and the most emotional reaction you’ll probably get out of me is just frustration or a little bit of fear if it goes on a little bit too long.
everyone is prickish about it, when i was younger i could never participate in sport and people thought i was so lucky when everything just hurt and my head was always light and the office ladies fucking despised me. no one wants to call it a real disability (what else is it? I dare you, tell me what a disability is), it makes you scared to do things, you dont want to run that race or try that sport because you know you won’t be able to do it. you need breaks while running. inhalers are more expensive the price stacks up over time
like when i have an asthma attack, i literally cannot just breathe. that is the entire problem. i cannot do breathing exercises, it does not matter whehter or not i look you in the eyes, i need the medication for my chronic illness.
i had this whole thing where a bunch of student in primary school like year 5-6 made videos about me, mocking me and calling me asthma attack girl, and pretending to have asthma attacks to be like look at (name) and how much shes faking!! and putting them online and they got a lot of shares.
“stop doing that stupid wheezing thing and just breathe” “why are you coughing like that? don’t you want to breathe?” “look at me, no, NO, HEY, HEY, look at me and breathe in- NO NO, BREATHE in and hey no-” “you just lost control of yourself, you need to stay in control and not give in to the asthma”
like. fuck you. treat us with respect. also because your ableism is easy to clown on.
91 notes - Posted October 16, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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I love a good hot take, especially ones that are just a hot take like this one and not just an absolute troll of an opinion intended to rile people up. That's not what this is and I did enjoy the post
Adding my 2 cents that wasn't asked for at all, sorry! Hope I'm not overstepping. Feel free to let me know if I am.
I sort of disagree, but I do see where OP is coming from. So as someone who has an entire section on my masterlist dedicated to "insecure jikookers" here is why I use that term, and probably will continue to do so and how I use it.
Just looking at that section of my masterlist (and I understand that the name of that might feel offense to some, being grouped with tkkrs, but it's not meant to be), it will give a good example of what I mean honestly...
As someone who has been a blogger open to anons for a few years now, I have seen EVERYTHING. Lol and when I say there are insecure jikookers, that's EXACTLY what I mean. I don't mean people using critical thinking and questioning things like "wait, but how would that.... Insert whatever here" I mean the constant back and forth depending on the type of content they are currently watching. And it's incredibly frustrating to have to go in circles over and over again with someone because they don't want to have an actual conversation. They want me to tell them what to think in a way that doesn't leave them with extra questions or reasonable doubt.
I made three posts a while ago explicitly talking about insecurity and I still stand by them, you can read those here if you wanted...
This is one where I mentioned similarly to OP that a lot of times insecure is not the correct word to be using and they aren't insecure shippers at all, but trolls or just baby army who don't understand how content drops work yet
There is a huge difference in chronic insecurity and making that someone else's problem (and when they come to my blog, they are trying to make it my problem) and wanting to engage in a thought provoking discussion where perhaps you walk away from it agreeing to disagree. And when I call someone an insecure jikooker, it's often because they are displaying patterns of it, usually goes something like this:
"Jikook are the cutest couple ever!!! Look at how soft and touching and caring they are"
"omg, how could Jikook be a couple though if JK tells Tae that he loves him? They must all be friends right?"
"wahhhh they almost kissed!! Such boyfriends!"
"wtf?! How can they be dating if they rough house like that??! It's not okay"
And they come to me every single time and it's simply the constant ship jumping and they just want to announce themselves or it's constant "convince me to come back to the ship." It drives me up the wall, I have to be completely honest.
And that's just one kind of example. Honestly, check the links above for better ones. Please.
And let me disclaimer this that a lot of the times, I can usually tell repeat anons from the way they write. And I know not everyone person writing in to me is chronically insecure and might just be confused by certain things. I'm not shitting on those people. At all. I just get very annoyed by discourse that is constantly repeated over and over every few months that can't stem from anything other than antis or insecurities in your own opinions. Which again, is different than just questioning things, reevaluating your opinions or even just changing your mind.
I would NEVER criticize someone for having reasonable doubt. I would actually actively encourage it and I think that if every shipper of an RPS ship made sure to keep a modicum of reasonable doubt in their mind, they would be a lot happier and healthier in the way they engage in fandom spaces. Shipping is supposed to be fun, not something that would ruin your life if you end up wrong, which is an incredibly real possibility. You aren't shipping your best friend with their crush... You are shipping essentially strangers. It's important to remember that you don't actually know them. And when you say that you love and support them, be prepared to mean it even if they aren't dating the boy you think are 🤷♀️
I absolutely see where you are coming from, I see your disclaimer paragraph about maybe where it came from, which I've basically expanded upon with all my wordy words. I disagree that it seems cultish, but I do agree and see where it has become much more widely used in jikooker spaces in a wider type of way.... Not sure if I fully agree with you that it's being used as a way to shut down reasonable doubt or critical conversation, but I'm willing to admit my sample size is low and it absolutely could be!
I do have a problem with anons trying to like bait me into answering their asks with a "I just want a reasonable discussion using critical thinking" type starters because a lot of the time, it doesn't seem to be in actual good faith and I hate spending my limited free time talking in circles. If that's what you actually want, just talk to me kindly like an actual human being please. Lol
The one bigger thing that I did take away from this, and that I will be going to sit and think on further is that anon has made me realize that I am probably also getting more easily annoyed with something I may consider eye roll worthy that someone else probably doesn't way more than I used to. Might not be the point they were trying to make but it's making me think.
I used to have SO much more patience and kindness for people who were insecure, even annoyingly so and not just trolls, or to have more in depth conversations about things. I know part of it is because I had more free time to do so online during the pandemic than I do now. But I know a larger part of it is that I have become very bitter and disillusioned with this fandom space I have on this blog. Not with BTS or Jikook at all, but with my jikooker spaces. I've said this before. But it's really affected how I feel about it and how I interact here for sure too. I think that feeling that way is fair considering everything I have been put through here, and it's not entirely unreasonable. BUT
It's something I think I need to take time to really sit with and decide on what I want to do. Because it's also not fully fair to myself to simmer in that for something that's supposed to just bring me joy. The feeling is fair, but the results of it are a little less so. So I need to decide what I'm able and willing to let go of. Because it's not fair to carry that bitterness through all my interactions here. To me or to my followers. I'm not saying the same level of trust will probably ever return, it can't. That's just gone.... But I need to either let go and release those feelings and get back to letting this be something that's purely fun for me. Which includes engaging with y'all. Or I need to probably let the blog go. Never the fandom, I'm here with BTS for life man, but maybe curate a new and different space for myself (and not tell anyone lol) where I can just enjoy the content. Idk, something to sit with. Because I used to enjoy longer form discussions with people who disagreed with me more often. Lol I still do! I just have so much less patience for this entire space right now still. If I stay here making use of this space, I would want to get back to that. Where I had more enjoyment for everything that running this blog entails, including the more annoying aspects of it, like the insecurity rollercoaster, which I will continue to call out if anons bring it to my blog. 🤷♀️
TLDR: I'm still going to call people who are in the insecurity rollercoaster insecure. It's just what they are. Only if they don't want to engage in actual discussion or continue to go in constant circles. I don't think it's cultish or wrong to do so personally. But I can appreciate this post and the ideas behind it, even while I don't agree. 💜
On “Insecure Jikookers”…
Alright. I might lose followers for this and that’s very okay; curate your timeline and protect your peace babes. But for YEARS, every time the phrase “insecure jikooker” has come up on my feed my eyelid has done a little twitchy twitch 🤨🤨
And I have always ignored it, because I’ve never wanted to be out here policing ppl’s language and we are literally supposed to be having fun and celebrating love, like for me that’s the whole point, but —
I’ve been seeing the phrase popping up again surrounding the release of AYS and I just gotta say it.
You guys the term seems so culty 😬🥲
Like I think I get the origin (maybe)? It probably started when some of the early jikook bloggers (if you are one I salute you, I am not worthy, trust me this is NOT a dig at anyone, jikook bloggers are by and large cool and kind af 🙇♀️) would get these sketchy asks that were antis or cultists in disguise just casting aspersions on jikook’s bond or being blatantly homophobic and/or in general being rude little anonymous internet gremlins. Or maybe it was people who did want to believe that jikook was real but kept nagging and begging for reassurance at every turn, which I can totally see becoming annoying as hell and prompting people to start using the term.
But it feels like it’s used now as like a catchall for anyone who expresses any doubt or asks any critical questions? Even like… reasonable ones? And I used to see a lot of “hey believe what you want to believe but this is what I believe” but now it seems like the sentiment around jikooker communities has by and large become ��if you don’t believe you’re an idiotic dumb person who has never known love — you’re either a rival shipper in disguise or WORSE (dun dun dunnnnn) an Insecure Jikooker — and we don’t want people like you around.”
And idk it just feels weird for a community that has always seemed to kind of pride itself on being the “rational, fact-based” ship… like we LOVE to be smug about how jikook don’t need edits to be obvious, don’t need slo-mo zooms with red circles and arrows because their chemistry and fondness and affection is just plain to see in basic footage. We’re the levelheaded ones 😌.
But doesn’t that mean that we should always be encouraging critical thinking, and if someone comes to a different conclusion than us, so be it? Like it or not, none of us have foolproof confirmation that jikook are anything more than very close friends. That’s literally all we know. The rest is our best guess based on vibes, anecdotes, dot-connecting, subtext and body language observation, experience, perception (!!This is a big one because confirmation bias is real!!), and suspicion. That’s literally it.
Look maybe I’m just projecting 😅 but when you criticize people for expressing reasonable doubt over something that is literally not confirmed, it’s just a little too religious fundamentalist for me! (This is why I was a bad Christian, because I always raised my hand and asked questions the Sunday school teacher didn’t like.)
Feel free to ignore me. I never want to come across as pushy or trying to stir up anything, it’s just a phrase that grinds my gears and I’m sort of hoping I’m not alone in that… but if I am, so be it! 🤣 would love to hear people’s thoughts because maybe I’m missing something.
(P.S. If you’re a troll who spams jikook blog inboxes this is not me defending you. You’re still annoying and you need a better hobby. Have you tried yoga? Snowboarding? Fly fishing? Filming food vlogs and/or painting? You should try cooking. You should stop being an anonymous internet troll stomping on everyone’s proverbial sandcastles and instead write a poem. K bye ✌️ )
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I posted 1,089 times in 2022
That's 896 more posts than 2021!
284 posts created (26%)
805 posts reblogged (74%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@finniestoncrane (💚❓️🐧)
@march-harrigan (💙🎩🐰)
@sweetums0kitty (💜😺💯)
@riddlersbimbo (💚🎞❓️)
@spicedchaiandromeda (❤💫📚)
I tagged 926 of my posts in 2022
Only 15% of my posts had no tags (oops)
#ri rambles - 305 posts
#ri answers - 137 posts
#rip - 100 posts
#ri writes - 93 posts
#edward nygma - 89 posts
#the riddler - 87 posts
#finnie writes - 70 posts (💚💚💚)
#fanart - 61 posts
#finnie 💚 - 41 posts (💚💚💚💚 ilysm can't you tell)
#dc comics - 41 posts
Longest Tag: 99 characters
#but i will literally try to compensate by knowing everything there is to know about its development
(rip this was me explaining how I'm a fan of video games despite my lack of capability to play them)
Keep Reading for my Top Posts of 2022, it was getting really long lmao
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Riddlers Reacting to Reader Wearing A “TikTok��� Dress
A/N: okay so a few things:
1) This was one of my first original ideas for headcanons when I first decided to write fanfics again, so I’m excited to feel confident enough to write it rip (this is also one of the more self indulgent ideas I’ve had so bare with me)
2) Heidi Lavon owns my tiktok, so it’s my job to bless you with her content here’s her in the dress:
3) It’s called the Carmen Dress and it has a $300 price tag on god save queens
4) As I mentioned this is 100% self indulgent, so sorry for ALL the errors, this idea has been brewing in my mind for months until I couldn’t hide it anymore, so if it reads like rambles…that’s why lol
( Also, I mention it in only one or two headcanons, but ALL these bastards would ask if it comes in green (unfortunately it doesn’t but I’ll be damned if a couple these guys won’t try and make it happen) also this all takes place in private)
Trigger Warnings: heavy suggestiveness (I mean...look at the dress) and strong language (I have a sailor mouth, sorry not sorry)
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143 notes - Posted October 13, 2022
#4
How our Riddleboys react to their asses getting slapped? Not like in a sex way. Just reader casually walks past and gives them a good ol’ smack on the ass to flirt in a silly way.
A/N: hehe…hehehe…sorry this request gave me the giggles for the longest time lmao. If this isn’t some shit I’d do hehe
How The Riddlers React to Having Their Asses Slapped
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148 notes - Posted December 14, 2022
#3
hi if its fine with you id like to request riddler with an artsy s/o and like theyre suffering artblock so they do a painting of him (he finds it sweet)
can be any riddler of ur choice and i also prefer gender neutral but if u end up writing fem i dont mind!
have a good night/day
-anon
A/N: aahhh that’s meee…this request resonates with me so well as an artist that suffers from art block or a chronic victim of endless reference scrolling to where I get lost saving references for everything but what I was looking for rip…only for me to settle and just draw Eddie from different media lol. And I'm so sorry ahead of time this got ridiculously long, I got really carried away and was having so much fun with the idea rip. So sorry for the length!
Riddlers React to Reader’s Art of Him:
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152 notes - Posted November 10, 2022
#2
I know Arkhamverse has trauma from being strangled, but I always want to kiss EVERY SINGLE RIDDLER on his neck! And that got me thinking... So I have to ask, how do the Riddlers feel about their necks? Like are any of them sensitive? Ticklish? Are any against their neck being touched? Do any love when their s/o goes for their neck?
A/N: okay but anon…how…how did you know I'm an absolute sucker for neck kisses?? Both giving and receiving?? Decided to go more headcanons this route, hope that's all right anon!
Neck Kisses with the Riddlers
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174 notes - Posted December 7, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Hey this was me who wanted a whole fic for this scenario for the bottom line "go be pretty over there away from me" could u do it thank u
A/N: I’m writing this at like 4 am cause I can’t sleep, so if this goes down later tomorrow I'm heavily editing it rip but hey at least I get to practice writing for other rogues that pique my interest! I hope I do them justice. This is another shot of just my own generalized takes on them (albeit I've been watching BTAS again, so they may seem softer than normal rip), and still no Joker sorry not sorry and most of these ended up being fluffier than I intended oop. Special thanks to @like-rain-or-confetti for supporting my ramblings in the tags of my reblogs lol
Batman Rogues x Reader - Yes, You’re Pretty…Now GO AWAY
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264 notes - Posted October 20, 2022
I’m genuinely surprised at all I was able to accomplish after taking a break from fandom and then kinda coming back full speed in September. I can’t even begin to imagine what the rest of this year would’ve turned out had I decided not to throw my hat in the ring. If I decided to just go ahead and post my first story, I wouldn’t nearly be as happy as a creator and I’m so grateful every day for the friends that I have made and continue to make on this platform.
Thank you guys so much for everything.
Here’s to 2023!
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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So I'm currently unemployed because I got fired for taking too much sick leave (it was legally sketchy blah blah blah but in the end I just can't work and take care of myself and investigate my mystery health problems at the same time). So I've been spending more time writing!
I really admire your writing and loved Hunger Pangs. I'm looking forward to the poly elements developing and I'm wondering if you have any advice for writing about poly. I've made one of my projects a snarky take on "write what you know" ... Apparently what I know is southern gothic meets Pacific northwest gothic, chronic illness pandemic surrealism, and falling back-asswards into threesomes.
I know this is a very open-ended question and I don't expect an answer, I'm just curious about it if you have the energy. As a writer, trying to write honestly / realistically about polyamory/enm, I'm curious if you have any thoughts on what's different about portraying monogamy or nonmonogamy in books, romance or erotica or otherwise.
I'm trying to read examples but it's hard to find examples that fit the niche I'm looking at. Excuse me if this question is nonsense, it's the cluster headaches.
I'm sorry to hear you've been dealing with all that and solidarity on the cluster headaches. But I'm glad you're finding an outlet through writing! And I hope you're happy with an open-ended ramble in response because oh boy, there's a lot I could talk about and I could probably do a better job of answering this sort of thing with more specific questions, but let's see where we end up.
There's definitely a big difference between writing polyamory/ENM (ethical non-monogamy) and what people often expect from monogamous love stories.
Just even from a purely sales and marketing standpoint, the moment you write anything polyamorous (or even just straight up LGBTQIA+ without the ENM) you're going to get considered closer to being erotica/obscene than hetero romances. It's an unfair bias, but it's one that exists in our society. But also the Amazon algorithm and their shitty, shitty human censors. Especially the ones that work the weekends. (Talking to you, Carlos 🖕.)
So not only do you start out hyper-aware that you're writing something that is highly stigmatized or fetishized (at least I'm hyper-aware) but that you are also writing for a niche market that is starving for positive content because the content that exists is either limited, not what they want, or is problematic in some fashion i.e. highly stigmatized or fetishy. And even then, the wants, desires, and expectations of the community you're writing for are complex and wildly varied and hard to fit into an easy formula.
When writing monogamous love stories, there is a set expectation that’s really hard to fuck up once you know it. X person meets Y. Attraction happens, followed by some sort of minor conflict/resolution. Other plot may happen. A greater catalyst involving personal growth for both parties (hopefully) happens. Follow the equation to its ultimate resolution and achieve Happily Ever After.
But writing ENM is... a lot more difficult, if only because of the pure scope of possibilities. You could try to follow the same equation and shove three (or more) people into it, but it rarely works well. Usually because if you’re doing it right, you won’t have enough room in a single character arc to allow for enough growth, and if ENM requires anything in abundance, it’s room to grow.
And this post is huge so I’m going to put the rest under a cut :)
There's also a common refrain in certain online polyam/ENM circles that triads and throuples are overrepresented in media and they may be right to some extent. Personally, I believe the issue isn't that triads and throuples are overrepresented, but that there is such minuscule positive rep of ethical non-monogamy in general, that the few tiny instances we have of triads in media make it seem like it's "everywhere" when in actuality, it's still quite rare and the media we do have often veers into Unicorn Hunter fetish porn. Which is its own problematic thing. And just to be clear, I’m not including this part to dissuade you from writing "falling back-asswards into threesomes." If anything, I need more of it and would hook it directly into my brain if I could. I'm just throwing it out there into the void in the hope that someone will take the thought and run with it, lol.
I’d love to see more polyfidelitous rep in fiction, just as much as I’d like to see more relationship anarchy too. More diversity in fiction is always good.
Another thing that differs in writing ENM romance vs conventional monogamy is the feeling like you need to justify yourself. There's a lot of pressure to be as healthy and non-problematic as possible because you are being held to a higher standard of criticism. Both from people from without the ENM communities, and from the people within. Granted, some people don't give a shit and just want to read some fantastic porn (valid) but there are those who will cheerfully read Fifty Shades of Bullshit and call it "spicy" and "romantic," then turn around and call the most tooth-rottingly-sweet-fluff about a queer platonic polycule heresy. That's just the way the world works.
(Pro-tip for author life in general: never read your own reviews; that way madness lies. I glimpsed one the other day that tagged Hunger Pangs as “ethical cheating” and just about had an aneurism.)
And while that feeling of needing to justify yourself comes from a valid place of being excluded from the table of socially accepted norms, it can also be to the detriment of both the story and the subject matter at hand. I've seen some authors bend so far over backward to avoid being problematic in their portrayal of ENM, they end up being problematic for entirely different reasons. Usually because they give such a skewed, rose-tinted perspective of how things work, it ends up coming off as well... a bit culty and obnoxious tbh.
“Look how enlightened we are, freed from the trappings of monogamy and jealousy! We’re all so honest and perfect and happy!”
Yeah, uhu, sure Jan. Except here’s the thing, not all jealousy is bad. How you act on it can be, but jealousy itself is an important tool in the junk drawer that is the range of human emotion. It can clue us in to when we’re feeling sad or neglected, which in turn means we should figure out why we’re feeling those things. Sometimes it’s because brains are just like that and anxiety is a thing. Other times it’s because our needs are actually being neglected and we are in an unhealthy situation we need to remedy. You gotta put the work in to figure it out. Which is the same as any style of relationship, whether it’s mono, polyam or whatever flavor of ENM you subscribe to* And sometimes you just gotta be messy, because that’s how humans are. Being afraid to show that mess makes it a dishonest portrayal, and it also robs you of some great cannon fodder for character development.
Which brings me in a roundabout way to my current pet peeve in how certain writers take monogamous ideals and apply them to ENM, sometimes without even realizing it. The “Find the Right Person and Settle Down” trope.
Often, in this case, ENM or polyamory is treated as a phase. Something you mature out of with age or until you meet “The One(tm).” This is, of course, an attempt to follow the mono style formula expected in most romances. And while it might appeal to many readers, it’s uh, actually quite insulting.
To give an example, I am currently seeing this a lot in the Witcher fandom.
Fanon Netflix!Jaskier is everyone's favorite ethical slut until he meets Geralt then woops, wouldn’t you know, he just needed to find The One(tm). Suddenly, all his other sexual and romantic exploits or attractions mean nothing to him. Let's watch as he throws away a core aspect of his personality in favor of a man.
Yeah... that sure showed those societal norms...
If I were being generous, I’d say it’s a poor attempt at showing New Relationship Euphoria and how wrapped up people can become in new relationships. But honestly, it’s monogamous bias eking its way in to validate how special and unique the relationship is. Because sometimes people really can’t think of any other way to show how important and valid a relationship is without defining it in terms of exclusivity. Which is a fundamental misunderstanding of how ENM works for a lot of people and invalidates a lot of loving, serious and long-term relationships.
This is not to say that some polyam/poly-leaning people can't be happy in monogamous relationships! I am! (I consider myself ambiamorous. I'm happy with either monogamy or polyamory, it really just depends on the relationship(s) I’m in.) But I also don't regard my relationship with a mono partner as "settling down" or "growing up." It's just a choice I made to be with a person I love, and it's a valid one. Just like choosing to never close yourself off to multiple relationships is valid. And I wish more people realized that, or rather, I wish the people writing these things knew that :P
Anyway, I think I’ve rambled enough. I hope this collection of incoherent thoughts actually makes some sense and might be useful.
----
*A good resource book that doesn't pull any punches in this regard is Polysecure by Jessica Fern. It's a wonderfully insightful read that explores the messier side of consensual non-monogamy, especially with how it can be affected by trauma or inter-relationship conflicts. But it also shows how to take better steps toward healthy, ethical non-monogamy (a far better job than More Than Two**) and conflict resolution, making it a valuable resource both for someone who is a part of this relationship style***, but also for writers on the outside looking in who might have a very simple or misguided idea of what conflict within polyam/ENM relationships might look like, vs traditional monogamous ones.
** The author of More Than Two has been accused of multiple accounts of abuse within the polyamorous community, with many of his coauthors having spoken out about the gaslighting and emotional and psychological damage they experienced while in a relationship with him. A lot of their stories are documented here: https://www.itrippedonthepolystair.com/ (warning: it is not light material and deals with issues of abuse, gaslighting, and a whole other plethora of Yikes.) While some people still find More Than Two helpful reading, there are now, thankfully, much, much better resources out there.
*** Some people consider polyam/ENM to be part of their identity or orientation, while others view it as a relationship style.It largely depends on the individual.
#long post#writing#ethical non-monogamy#relationship styles#relationship models in fiction#also that kindle link is an affiliate link#because fuck giving amazon free recs
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