#sorry this is depressing i know
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started watching heartstopper and i've been super careful because of the whole eating disorder. turns out that isn’t even the issue anymore. what absolutely blindsided me was the scene where their mum sends tori to get charlie before dinner. tori being so worried, tori noticing that there’s something wrong when their parents joke about the lack of seasoning. siblings being there for siblings because their parents suck at actual parenting or even worsen a situation at times...... seems like years of therapy can help you manage disorders but what's even harder to overcome is the feeling of absolute despair, being completely alone in the world with no one to turn to or even to trust
#heartstopper#sorry this is depressing i know#ep2 just hit me in the face and i wasn't prepared for this#my oldest sister has borderline#my older brother was addicted#then there's me with eds since i was 12 and anxiety and depression since i was 15 but diagnosed only in my 20s#and then my little sister who's trying..... i know she is but she's just as broken but won’t let anyone near her#my dad working 60 hours a week completely overworked narcissistic hothead leaning towards alcoholism#and my mum suffering years of generational trauma - a super nervous anxious perfectionist with an eating disorder herself#both parents reqlly hard working but no access to education and any progressive ideas such as how to properly treat your children's issues#mental health#what's that#talking to therapists???#nope that's for actually sick people#damn.......#i can't believe this triggered so much#charlie spring#tori spring#spoilers
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me too, luna.
#luna#celestia#mlp#my art#fanart#comic#grand galloping 20s#doodles#oscillating between serious “luna has depression” and funny “luna is a shut in who smells bad and reads books without a light”#luna would LOVE modern pajamas and sweatpants rip#also celestia usually uses first person “I” pronouns but Luna almost exclusively uses we/us#because nightmare moon is technically another identity sharing her body#it's like DID but not because it's not a disorder to them#edit: sorry should clarify that did doesn't need to be considered a disorder either#i don't know the preferred nomenclature for this topic there's someone in the tags who explains
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colored some sketches
#my art#dsmp#c!tommy#c!tubbo#c!quackity#c!ranboo#trying very hard to not spiral into depression and quit art aah.....#sorry for the boring drawings lately i dont know what else to draw
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Please vote ❤️
#I'm sorry if this is depressing#I bring this up to my friends way too often tho#I can't wait for the fall of capitalism#btw for people in the comments I this is a joke#I don’t actually hope for the collapse of society and the death of billions of people#and yes#I will be voting in November and not for the fascist#and side note: this is my own interpretation of some ever-changing lore#I know it’s not completely accurate#star trek#star trek tos#star trek aos#star trek ds9#star trek tng#star trek discovery#star trek snw#september 2024
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I wish I could just overdose on sadness and just be gone, peacefully in my sleep.
#hitting styro#988twt#depressing shit#i hate everything#988blr#baby cvts#cvtaddict#s3lfharmm#i hate it here#sorry for being depressing#i have a problem#i dont fucking know#i hate my body#this is depressing#im just a girl#i hate this#i dont even know
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hina... have you ever drawn nanami & yuji. pls i need to see them. my reluctant mentor and ray of sunshine. maybe eating together after a mission
cleaned up this request doodle from a while ago <3
#my art#answered#anonymous#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#nanami kento#yuji itadori#jujutsu kaisen fanart#sorry for getting to this so late anon :'<<<<#also sorry the art technically isnt new shkdg i tried to come up w a different setting fr them#thought abt them going fr ramen or something ? like an izakaya scene#but i wasnt happy w any of my sketches n took the easy way out gomen gjdghjj#i hope u still like the cleaned version!#well . “clean” gjhgssgj yuuji sweetie do u need a napkin#both of these pastries r based off ones we sold at the bakery i used to work at#u know . the one that put me into a 7 month depressed artblock n made me want to kms/srs#and speaking from experience. those filled croissants r not user friendly#crumbs + cream + fruit + syrup drizzle + chocolate...all EVERYWHERE smh#also nanami's looks like a cookie but it's not i promise. it is a raisin danish bc he has th palette of an old man at 27
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you're nice to people who are bald or balding, right? you're nice to people with high hairlines? or weird hair growth? right? you don't make mean jokes about going bald at the expense of people who are going through the very scary and usually very isolating process of losing hair?? right???
#sorry (?not really?) but finding high hairlines beautiful has 100000% fixed my self image issues AND made me nicer.#you should be nice to people with little or weird or no hair. i dont want to get depressing but hair loss can be so terrifyingly isolating#be nice!!#you really do NOT know who of your loved ones or friends you are hurting with funny haha bald jokes. and if you DO know who youre hurting#and are still making them anyways#im coming for you.#barkbarkbarkbark#you should be nice to people regardless of physical traits but like#ive seen an uptick in haha bald is ugly jokes on tumblr specifically so im biting tumblr
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who would you rather meet in hell: the devil himself or two bugs
#ultrakill#v1#v2#they're like if a bug was a velociraptor. to me#im sorry i was gone for so long from art....and asks....oughhh...#depression was hitting hard but i think im bouncing back!!#i have lots of ideas at least lol#hopefully now school doesn't eat every second i have#doodle tag#gore tw#I GUESS i never know since my art is like this. the blood is all pink.
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Bracelet date ♡
Bonus
#I think acht would fw skrillex if they ever get the chance to listen to some of his songs#I mean if they flip all their tentacles to the right and put some glasses on they look like him#but anyways sorry guys. I just know some of you might see this and think I’m a different artist#but no it’s me again with my inconsistent art style#art#fanart#my art#original art#Splatoon#splatoon fanart#splatoon fan art#Splatoon acht#acht Splatoon#Splatoon dedf1sh#dedf1sh#Splatoon Callie#Callie Splatoon#Callie cuttlefish#acht minuta#calf1sh#callie x dedf1sh#love love love them#Marie Splatoon#Splatoon Marie#Marie cuttlefish#acht accidentally dropped the same bracelet multiple times and had to remake them all over again :(#poor depressed thing they deserve a hug and a warm blanket and all the kisses from their gf
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sylvia plath, todd anderson and virginia woolf (aka ACTUAL tortured poets) watching taylor “im breaking up with my boyfriend for his intense depression and blaming it on him, im dating a racist who enjoys watching woc being brutalized and harasses young woc artists, i sent my fans out on a hate train to attack a young woc actress for a line she had to say as part of her job to show how mentally ill her character was, im dating a maga supporter, i refuse to say anything about a current genocide despite being the most influential person in the world right now, i am a billionaire, i fly 13 minute flights and have the highest carbon emission of any celebrity, i am a known white feminist who only speaks about issues when it affects me and has constantly let my fans get away with extreme racism and even encouraged it by associating myself with known racists” swift call herself a tortured poet (her writing sounds like a bunch of thesaurus words slapped over gabba hanna and rupi kaur-esque poetry that was created purely as a trinket for an edgy pinterest board)
#anti taylor swift#like she can be problematic that’s okay#there are SO many problematic artists i like#but she’s not even that good#like read sylvia plath or virginia woolf or listen to LDR or fiona apple or mitski or lorde or boygenius or olivia rodrigo#aka her peers#and realise how much better they are#they truly write art because they have a compassion and rawness for it#whereas taytay only writes to get more money LOL#she’s so extremely privileged that her life is not at all relatable and now she tries to make it so#by romanticizing the most mundane#thats never been your brand babe now it’s going to sound like dogshit#GUTS by olivia rodrigo is better because it has such an intensity to it. liv means what she says and you can feel it!#fiona apple means what she says when she writes about begging her lover to love her back!#mitski means what she says when she writes that she is self destructive and puts herself in bad situations since that’s all she knows!#lana means what she says when she writes about her suicide attempt at 15 because of constant abuse from her mother and crippling depression#all of it such haunting and beautiful works because it truly comes from the soul and isn’t a cash grab#Anyway i’m so sorry virginia and sylvia and todd#todd anderson#AND JOE ALWYN#joe alwyn my favourite man ever#joe alwyn#dead poets society#anderperry#sylvia plath#virginia woolf#the bell jar#lana del rey#fiona apple#mitski
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I have all the time in the world. How about you?
There is a theme to Aylin's threats and vows of vengeance that I've noticed and that I want to share.
Do what you will. I cannot prevent you. But you know as well as I, I will come for you. One day.
That one, for example, is for Balthazar, while she is imprisoned.
I cannot prevent you. But I can advise you. Be careful to whom you yoke your fate. One day, when he is severed from me, Ketheric will die. I will not. And when I am freed, I will remember whose recompense to claim.
Did you expect me to beg? To cry? To plead? For what. I accept my fate - for now. But the life of a divine is longer than you can fathom, Sharran. And this cold chapter will close, one day.
And those are for you, when you've yet to harm her, when she's still only warning you off. But then, if you choose to try to kill her, like so many before you:
Was it everything you hoped for? Was it sweet, Sharran, to murder a paladin of Selûne - her daughter - her sword? Congratulations - your mistress Shar will write your name on her hand. And I? I will come for you. When the time is right.
The next bit depends on your character's gender:
When your sons are grown and your beard is long and wiry; when you cannot hold your nightly water and your nose grows as long as your weary, weary days… When your daughters are grown and your chin sprouts whiskers dark - when your teeth are yellow as corn and your sleep grows short and your days are long and weary, so weary… When your children are grown and your eyes are weak; when your nose grows as long as your weary, weary days…
Ultimately, your fate will be the same:
That is when this immortal will visit you, Sharran. That is when I will show you what it is to be afraid.
All these long-term promises of one day, coupled with inevitability.
I find it so striking that most of Aylin's threats include her flaunting and flexing her immortality (as well as her flawless, long memory) over whoever has wronged her.
Present your weapon, soldier. Plunge it into the Nightsong. I cannot stop you. But know this: I never forget a face. HAH! Are you afraid, Sharran? Do you rattle and jump at the realisation that an immortal has your face emblazoned in her mind forevermore?
Everything is but a passing inconvenience to her, she claims, even a century of imprisonment and torment. Outlasting, outliving - that is simply what she does and what she chooses to intimidate with. Promising to wait until you are old and decrepit, until after you've experienced all the vagaries of age that she never will, leaving her sword hanging over your head throughout the entire miserable lifespan that she has permitted you to have.
Then, if you wrong her in a very heinous way, there's the extreme one of outliving not only you, but killing and extinguishing your entire bloodline in order to obliterate every trace of you from existence:
WHEN I AM FREE, I WILL DESTROY YOU! I WILL MURDER YOU, AND YOUR CHILDREN, AND THEIR CHILDREN BESIDE! I will rip this world apart, plank and beam, until every iota of your being is scalded by my light. This is my promise. This is my vow.
Over and over, Aylin builds her oaths of vengeance on the foundations of an utter, even proud, certainty that she will see her foe end, one way or another, due to her nature and the simple fact of her own endlessness. This is the well she keeps coming back to.
And I find all of this, this consistent insistence on it, so striking and ironic, because one of her other main emotional threads is being thoroughly enraptured by and devoted to and just so completely in love with a mortal. One who will age and die and pass into memory just like all the targets of her rage - if I think of Isobel when I re-read all of that dialogue up there, it seems to cut both ways so deeply. But then there's the extra element that every single one of these is spoken when she either knows or is (incorrectly) convinced that Isobel is dead. Isobel, who didn't get to grow old, and who is both an anchor to humanity and a very painful reminder of the truth of Aylin's situation being twofold.
Aylin will outlast what she hates, yes, but she will outlast what she loves as well.
#dame aylin#bg3#baldur's gate 3#sorry i just decided to spew meta spontaneously#it will happen again#some good shit mortal/immortal angst to be found here always#is she consciously and deliberately drawing on that? i don't know but both the idea that she keeps picking at her wounds in that sense#using this/her particular experience of loss as a threat and a weapon now that she's so very intimately acquainted with it#and the idea that she's not aware of the implications and irony of what she keeps saying at all#work for me#man isobel-less aylin is both depressing and scary every time
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imma be so real with you I did NOT care for all the cutesy ways they presented Vi and Cait's disbalanced social status in arc 3
#first off the parallel of cait arriving to let vi out of prison. but this time they ~have sex~. IN THE CELL THAT WAS UNJUSTLY HOLDING JINX#bitch why are you invoking THAT REALLY FUCKED UP SCENE right before such a milestone romance scene??? it's not cute??? JINX WAS JUST HERE#then the one thing cait tries to apologize for is MADDIE. GIRL. NO ONE CARES ABOUT MADDIE. WE CARE ABOUT HOW YOU KEPT DEMEANING#AND TORTURING ZAUNITES INCLUDING VI. but that isn't addressed bc vi needs to give her head. speaking of vi#VI WHY ARE YOU GIGGLING LIKE A SCHOOLGIRL YOU ARE IN A PRISON CELL. REMEMBER HOW YOU WASTED 7 YEARS OF YOUR LIFE IN ONE#then the way jinx believes vi should be with cait as an alternative to staying with her simply because she is too fucked up while cait make#vi happy. i am sorry but show me where did jinx see cait makes vi happy. then the show just rolls with that and says ''yeah vi should be#forced to leave jinx behind and choose piltover. this is a happy ending for everyone.''#and finally ''i'm the dirt under your fingernails'' WHAT A DEPRESSING FUCKING FINAL NOTE TO LEAVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP ON.#a zaunite is literal DIRT under a ruling class piltie's fingernails. and it's cute and means they are gonna be together forever. HELLO????#i don't know WHAT that thing is but that thing is NOT MY OTP#arcane liveblog#arcane spoilers#it's like they were planning to write a fucked up tragic romance story. like they were PLANNING to make cait the bad guy. IT IS CRAZY#they weren't let's be clear. but s1 was so deep and yielded to analysis so well. meanwhile if you look any deeper than shallow into s2 you#get interpretations like THIS#''finally a lesbian couple with a happy ending'' YEAH IF YOU IGNORE CLASS. IF YOU IGNORE CLASS BASED OPPRESSION. CMON GUYS WE DESERVE BETTE
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Chat, I regret to inform you that I have added a new hyperfixation…so…
Agatha All Along Incorrect Quotes!
Alice: Hold the fuck up.
Also Alice, crawling into Lilia’s lap: It’s me. I’m the fuck up. Hold me.
Rio: I have an idea!
Jen: No murder.
Rio, sighing petulantly: I no longer have an idea.
Lilia: I have a bad feeling about this…
Agatha: What do you mean?
Alice: Don’t you ever get that little voice in the back of your head that tells you if something is going to get you in trouble?
Agatha: No.
Jen: That actually explains so much.
Lilia: As far back as I can remember, I’ve always had this little voice in my head telling me to “live it up today, because there’s not gonna be a lot of tomorrows”.
Agatha: You do realize there’s medication designed to get rid of those kinds of voices, right?
Teen: A bird flew in through my window and I’m trying to befriend it.
*later*
Agatha: Why don’t you quit bothering me and go talk to your bird friend?
Teen: Matthew and I are not speaking at the moment.
*the coven, huddling together behind a makeshift shelter to shield themselves from repeated gunshots*
Alice, hastily shoving the others behind her so she can return fire: Agatha, do you have any idea who would want to shoot you?!
Agatha, squashed between Jen and Rio: Many people want to shoot me. I take great pride in that!
Jen, glaring at the group as she hands over bail money:
Alice, tapping her shoulder: What about Teen?
Jen, glaring more: I’ve got to bail him out too? Where’s Agatha?
Teen: No one called her. We used Lilia’s phone call to call Alice and Rio’s to call you. Then Rio used my phone call to vote for American Idol.
Rio: :)
Jen: Rio isn’t answering her phone.
Agatha: Here, I’ll try.
Jen: Alice and I have tried six times each, what makes you think that-
Rio, picking up on the first ring: Hey, sweetheart.
Agatha: The ends always justify the means!
Jen: Do you know who said that?
Agatha: Was it Oprah or someone nice and great like that?
Jen: It was Machiavelli. A decidedly non-Oprah like person.
Jen: I bet you didn’t even finish the thing I asked you to get done!
Agatha: For your information, I most certainly did! Got it done last night!
Teen, whispering to Agatha: You didn’t get it done, did you?
Agatha, whispering back: I don’t even know what she’s talking about.
Lilia: I am at a loss for words!
Teen, glancing at the camera like his mom like he’s on The Office: Despite being lost for words, Lilia yelled at us for the next 45 minutes.
Agatha, carrying Señor Scratchy out of the room:
Señor Scratchy: *snuggles under her chin*
Agatha, kissing his head: You are being punished. Please stop being adorable. I love you.
Teen: I got a trampoline tent for summer sleepovers!
Jen, whispering to the other adult witches: …think of all the sex.
Alice: There are two types of people.
Rio: If you wanted to eat someone, you could put a fire under it and slowly roast them :)
Lilia: …three. Three types of people.
Jen, cautiously: I can’t believe I didn’t notice this before, but…Teen, you are a little crazy.
Teen: Aren’t we all a little crazy here, Jen?
Jen: No, I mean you’re aging-ballerina, child-chess-prodigy, professional magician kind of crazy.
Teen: It’s my mom’s fault. You know, we come from a Jewish family, but she used to tell me the reason Santa didn’t come was because my room was too dirty.
Rio: I’ve come looking for trouble. And if I can’t find trouble, I WILL create some.
Alice: Do you trust me?
Lilia, smiling proudly at her: Yes.
Alice, who has been completely panicking: Wait, what? Why?!
Agatha, awkwardly glancing around for help: Er…Alice, I’m gonna be honest, I don’t know what to say to people who are crying. So I’m just gonna hope that the tone of my voice makes you think I do, okay, sweetie?
Alice, sniffling: …thanks, Agatha.
Agatha, patting her on the back with a bit too much enthusiasm: No problem, kid.
Lilia: I told Agatha about it weeks ago!
Teen: She WHAT?
Agatha: What??? Lilia says insane shit all the time, how was I supposed to know this one was true?!
Lilia: Bank accounts are a sham created by the shadow government!
Agatha: SEE?!
BONUS:
Wanda, watching from the afterlife: so…when exactly do kids grow out of that whole emo, rebellious stage?
Lorna, shrugging: I don’t know. Alice is still in it.
#agatha all along#agatha harkness#rio vidal#lilia calderu#jennifer kale#alice wu gulliver#teen agatha all along#billy kaplan#señor scratchy#agatha all along spoilers#Agatha all along incorrect quotes#alice “mommy issues” wu gulliver#agathario#we love our dangerous lesbians#we were robbed of alice getting to use her ex cop skills and I’m salty about it#agatha is a problem child#rio is a menace to society#they left her in jail#she broke out#I think I’m funny#found family#mentions of wanda maximoff and lorna wu#alice needs a damn hug#and so does teen (I can’t call him billy quite yet I don’t know why)#lilia is the friend-turned-mother-figure that alice and teen both desperately need (sorry agatha you don’t count right now)#tw: sex jokes#tw: violence jokes#really just tw: rio vidal#sometimes family is a traumatized teen; the stressed witch he designated as his pseudo mom; her psycho ex wife; her mlm friend;#a reluctant nepo baby with depression; and the crazy psychic grandma they found on the side of the road
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The thing I love the most about Alastor is that we can't truly know what to think of him, if he is being truly manipulative or if there's a genuine undertone behind any of his words, and that allows people to interpret him differently from one person to another. Like "oh he's being so sweet and supportive", to "no actually he's just saying what people want to hear because he's an evil manipulator". Maybe some fans are being too trustful, just like Charlie, and falling into his lies. BUT maybe there's a true genuine undertone to everything he says, maybe he can be a sweetie behind his evil mask. And maybe he'll turn out redeemable. Or not at all. Who knows?
His character could go in two completely different directions in the next seasons and we have no way of telling how he'll turn out. It's still fully open because he showed he can be awful and evil and manipulative, but since there's been very few hints here and there that he could get attached to the hotel, that means he could be sweet despite all that. The mystery and uncertainty is keeping us thinking and hoping and I LOVE that. He's such a unique and amazingly written character.
On a personal note, I think the two different directions his character could take should coexist. Yes, he's going to be a main villain in the future seasons and betray Charlie and the hotel, yes he's an evil manipulator, BUT he could also get attached to them and show redeemable qualities at the same time. For me it would make the heartbreak even greater and his character even more satisfying.
#text#hazbin hotel#alastor#hazbin alastor#this man is rotating in my brain non stop I needed to get it out of my system#either way I cant wait to see him challenge Charlie's idea of redemption#by being either SUPER hard to redeem or completely impossible to redeem#cant wait for the anguish the pain and the heartbreak he will bring in future seasons ❤#YES I KNOW I havent posted in so long i'm sorry depression and artblock had me on a chokehold#I'll be back with more art I just needed to let out my thoughts about HH
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Julie and the Phantoms being one of the most heartwarming and feel good shows I've ever watched, while simultaneously having the most absurdly tragic premise will never not to be funny to me.
#jatp#julie and the phantoms#i'm sorry maybe it's just me and my dark sense of humor#but the contrast of these two things gets me#yeah let's start the show with the death of 3 main characters then jump forward in time where the other main character#is struggling with depression from the loss of her mother#and then let's have her form an inevitably tragic bond with the ghosts of the 3 dead characters from earlier#but there's musical numbers!!#excuse me sir this is a kid's show#(yes i know that it would have had a happy ending if they'd gotten to really end it but still)#personal#td#mine
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I'm begging you, BioWare... Learn from the mistakes of Baldur's Gates past...
#please accept this low effort meme while i work on Emmrich-inspired creative pursuits#hoping and praying and sobbing and crying#BioWare i'm on my hands and knees begging you to GIVE THE SWEET NECROMANCER A SOFT TUMMY#emmrich volkarin#dragon age emmrich#okay now im gonna start complaining in the tags so this is your warning#i just don't think im strong enough to withstand ANOTHER RPG with companions that Should Not Fucking Have Abs#like sure i could MAYBE suspend my disbelief that the vain wizard would use some illusion magic to give himself abs (still cringe)#or MAYBE he got really into crunches while he was depressed for a year (HIGHLY doubtful)#BUT THE EMACIATED VAMPIRE!?#like come on bestie#did cazador have some really rigorous workout routines that were conveniently never brought up???#im going insane sorry#i just have a lot of opinions on diverse body types in video games#and dont want them to do my man dirty like that#[insert joke about how getting down and dirty with him is my job]#okay sorry i think i got it all out of my system#if anyone actually read this far please know i love you with my entire serpentine heart
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