#sorry lmao that sounded funnier in my head

[mythvoiced]

-. finally bought m'own copies of the Iliad and the Odyssey IN GERMAN~ ♥

[the-moon-files]

Hi! I'm kinda new here but I was hoping to leave a request or at least something to chew on. So there's this genshin sagau where the reader has a bit of a language barrier with the other characters and I was wondering if that translated over to the Linked Universe as well? Like imagine the boys finding this random person with different clothes, accessories, and they talk in a language never before heard of? What are they, some kind of eldritch being? Meanwhile reader recognizes them obviously but frustratingly can't express any feelings asides from base concepts! Man.

Some funnies include; reader voicing more thoughts out loud now that no one can really understand them and reader eventually learning the language and getting a really sick accent out of it.

That's all my tired brain can think of atm so I bid you adieu. Have a good rest of your day :)

First Official Request!! :D oh and its amazinggg, ooOOO a language barrier AU, genshin? hm wonder who wrote that

Reader wasn��t specified and ive adopted masc!reader as the normal over here, so masc reader it is 👍

Sun: Masc/Male Reader (”you”/he/him)

Orbit: EXTRA LONG Headcanons-ish/scenarios SORRY 😭, Language Barrier AU my beloved

Stars: The Classic Chain of Links <3

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cussing, typical mild loz violence, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

so for the sake of even funnier confusion, lets say the boys kinda missed u falling thru a portal, and instead just see the portal, and it disappears w/nothing coming out

(bc u obv are a competent person and clearly recognize the giant horse head stable from Breath of the Wild and went inside, like to orient urself, u will NOT be a Y/N damsel in distress 💀)

the boys had already been heading to that stable to sleep for the night, and needless to say, u nearly have a fit LMAO

first, the Hero of Time walks in, then the Link from Hyrule Warriors, then from Link’s Awakening? Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom Link?? Wind Waker Link, Four Sword Link??? The original Legend of Zelda Link-!!!!

well at least u arent the only weirdly dressed person there

(well, u arent weird looking for the hylians in the stable, theyre used to this weird shit, but the Chain of heroes on the other hand…)

they get to observing their bunkmates for the night, subtly squinting at you, then turning to talk to each other, and slowly every link gets made aware of ur prescense, u didnt think u stood out that bad..

(”くいんね しら んらな すいそらきみについ ちみん らは かくちか まいていりすん はすらも んらなす いすち・”) *

it also quickly becomes obvious to every traveler in the stable that you either cant speak, or wont speak, as when ur exchanging money for rupees at the front desk, the owner is accommodating with you by pointing and grunting and ur just nodding and pointing back

well, its not like when u first greeted the guy u understood even a single thing the guy said, it sounded like some sub-dialect of Japanese or something

u had realized earlier with horror that the game was staying true to its creators, and that most likely everyone spoke a special version of Japanese and ur English ass was abt to be so lonely and confused 😭

Wars/Time/Sky/Four in particular clearly noticed u exchanging all ur currency, as u can see them whispering or glancing at you occasionally as u pocket ur now little green gems the size of coins, rather than strip of paper

(”しにし くい まなとかるるる みらか くちひい すなせいいと・ てくら しらいとみゃか くちひい すなせいいと・ かくちか くちとみゃか すいちりりん そくちみきいし らひいす かくい いすちとね くちと にか てにりし・”)

and the boys move on in the morning, and its acc torture for u bc u had no idea how to even begin to quell their suspicions enough to let you travel along with them

u think u could say u came out a portal, but.. how would tell them that? drawing pictures in the dirt?? 💀

and this just keeps happening.

even when u just try to admire from a distance or even outright just leave them to it and go off to explore Hyrule (as safe as u could after acquiring a weapon and some more clothes)

but its like fate (or maybe Hylia tbh) wants u to run into these legendary heroes (both kinda in ur world and definitely here) constantly

after the stable u manage to run into them in Kakariko Village, which wasnt crazy bc u needed more supplies, and it was the nearest town to the stable

ur sure they noticed, but u outright avoided them out of paranoia or making them paranoid u were following them, and u definitely saw who you thought was the hero of the Four Sword whisper about u as u walked by, not that u caught much

(”るるるかくちかゃと かくい とちもい とかすちみきいほりららのにみき きなん はすらも かくい とかちこりいる てい とくらなりし のいいせ ちみ いんい らみ くにもる”)

but you’d started to recognize some Japanese words! …and tbh anime is the only reason for that, something definitely like “watch, him” 💀

which rlly didnt make u feel any better, and u avoided them even harder, u bought a map, so u made sure to head in the opposite direction of them out of, lets be honest, kinda lowkey fear of what theyd do if they thought u were stalking them

but despite u trying to actively go away from them, either you, or them, would show up everywhere the other went,

you passed by Wind playing in the water in Zora’s Domain,

Twilight riding Epona around the plains in Central Hyrule, Sky hanging laundry outside Wild’s house in Hateno

Honest-to-fucking-god seeing Wars, Wild, and Legend all crossdress to sneak into Gerudo village- u cant fucking escape them-

and the worst part is, you cant understand anyone, other than some basic words atp 😭

its as the Chain come from a path that merges onto yours on the way to Rito Village when Legend snaps first

You’re not even surprised, tbh it was more surprising it took them so long 💀

(”にかゃと んらな!! ちきちにみ!!! てくん ちすぃ んらな はらりりらてにみき なと・ くらて ちすぃ んらな はらりりらてにみき なと・・ くらて ちすぃ てぃ はらりりらてにみき んらな・・!!”)

the look on ur face must have drawn some pity from Twilight bc he’s trying to talk Legend out of his yelling and pointing his sword at you,

(”ひいか そちりも しらてみ! りにのい んらな とちにしね に かくにみの ていゃひい ちりとら とらもいくらて こいいみ はらりりらてにみき かくいも からら!”)

Wars joins in, giving you a confused look, before talking to the group at large, most of which have their hands near their weapons, but dont look that inclined to use them, thank the fucking gods or whoever rules over Hyrule-

(”かくい すちみそくいす くちと ち せらにみかね かくにと すいいのと らは もちきにそ ちみし にゃも となすい にかゃと くんりにちゃと しらにみきる てい とくらなりし まなとか かすん から かちりの から かくいもね といい には かくいんゃすい いさせいすにいみそにみき ちみんかくにみき とかすちみきいる”)

oh no. they want to talk you, you barely picked out in their argument

Time nods in agreement, before stepping forward to talk first, you cant even imagine how anxious u look rn lol

(”かくい らかくいすと ちすい すにきくかね かくにと にと りらみき らひいすしないる もん みちもい にと かにもいね ちみし かくいとい ちすい もん かすちひいりにみき そらもせちみにらみとね ちと にゃも となすい んらなゃひい きちかくいすいし はすらも なと すなみみにみき にみから いちそく らかくいす とら もなそくる てくちかゃと んらなす みちもい・”)

why has Hylia forsaken you. what did you do to not receive some sort of fancy natural translator power in ur brain or something after getting portaled here, its the least she could do for fucks sake- talking to someone in a diff. language is SO much harder than just listening to them to understand what theyre saying-

you desperately try to recall the words people have said at stables and whatnot when introducing themselves, before they realized you couldnt speak the same language

(”Uh… もん みちもい にと… and I’m not following you…とらすすん”)

you just try to say ur name and then say sorry LMAO 😭

Nearly every Link is staring at you bug-eyed in shock, confusion, and understanding all at once

the Chain’s attitude changes pretty quick after that, and they quickly connect the dots after, yes, u do a drawing of a portal in the dirt 💀

u gather from the few words u can get that it was indeed magic (probably Hylia) that kept shortcutting you and the group of heroes together over and over again

…

she can move your position in space time and yet she cant get u an auto-translator after being forced to be here.

(in the middle of u drawing to communicate Hyrule manages to understand the gist of what you meant by that and laughs)

the Chain are quick to be very accomdating, Wars/Sky/Wild all offering to try and better teach u their language, but in return they want to learn yours?

actually, that was smth u noticed pretty early on in the ensuing weeks of travel, was the fascination they had w/English and ur voice??

Wind constantly rambled at you and poked and smiled at you to try and get you to ramble back, and after getting more comfortable around them,

u start to talk like they cant understand a word ur saying, which is entirely accurate, and you notice some like to lean in when you talk, or respond with humming/saying smth like u can understand, or even just gesture for u to keep going

Four/Time/Legend?? surprisingly/Hyrule/Twilight like when u get rlly talkative like ur having a one-sided convo w/them all the time, and they constantly are looking at you poinetedly to hear u narrate whatever ur doing or give a response whenever they same something at you (Rulie/Four/Twi/ and sometimes Time, (and he turns away but Legend too) give a little smile whenever you ramble)

Wild is Very Interested in your langauage, bc the Zora, Rito, Gerudo, and Gorons all had their native tongue that he ended up learning, and so he constantly makes notes to try and decipher some of what ur saying in English

he lights up anytime ur able to successfully tell him another something abt it, like the alphabet, or grammar or structure etc

they seem to pay attention esp in the mornings or late at night? ur not sure why until Wind both draw pictures and tries to get the general idea to you to explain

(”かくいんゃすい ちりり きちんる んらなす ちそそいみか にと くらか ちみし んらなす ひらにそい にと しいいせる かくいんゃすい ていちのる”)

smth abt ur voice being nice? deep? but theirs do that too? u dont get it, but thank him anyway

they also help u out at markets, keep out of trouble w/locals, and other misc tasks that need some language help

everythings going great, the Chain trusts you, ur getting better at their language every day, and bc English is one of the hardest languages to learn in the world, theyre slowly getting some of urs!

it isnt until ur camping out in the Temple of Time when things get weird again

Not only is there English carved into the walls, which u read as the Chain give u “explain now” looks and u communicate that the rlly ancient looking script they may or may not be able to read is, in fact, the written version of ur language-

but then another portal opens, and there’s sentences wrapped around the edges, which are fully in English too.

☆

* = hint: JIS

So i love ciphers for language barrier AUs, so have a cypher! have fun decoding it if u like, but don’t worry abt translating it, as its purposefully not important for u to enjoy this :)

JFC IM SO SORRY AB THE LENGTH I WROTE THIS FROM MIDNIGHT TO LIKE 1:30 AM- UGH sometimes this happens when i get on a scenario kick, SORRY 😭😭

also so sorry abt late reply! at least i already established im slow w/u guys so ig its not a huge surprise 😭

tysm for the request it was such a fun idea to write abt :D

i also like genshin, just a little bit u could say, so it was cool to see this carryover across fandoms lol

language barrier is so versatile, could be angst, crack, etc. so that makes sense

have a great weekend!!

Peace out,

🌙

[danieyells]

I don't know if you've done it yet but I would like to request Ren lines? I'm having tokyo debunker Ren brainrot bro 😭.

@otomelover23

You're all very welcome! I love you guys too, so far! Sorry you've been deprived of lazy boi lolol HOPEFULLY THESE SATISFY YOU A LITTLE BIT.

He's a little tsundere I think. He's one of those characters who just wants to be normal but he can't just pretend to be normal because he lives surrounded by chaos so he just complains a lot lolol. . .but i think he's a good guy. Aside from that he does not help his mother captain at all.

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Great, shift change. I'm gonna head out then... What? Do I really need to be here for that?"

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"I think you've got a notification... Aren't you going to look at it?"

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"Who did I disappoint in a past life to end up in Jabberwock... There's no general students or even a single other sane person, and these jumpsuits are a crime..."

"Why do I have to look after all these weird-ass animals? This is forced labor...  Ugh, they're so gross..."

"If you're just gonna stand there, could you go feed the animals in the aquatic zone?  I'm too busy."

"Ugh, why is that clown calling me... ... Whatever, I'll just let it ring out."

you know damn well that if you don't answer the phone you're gonna have to deal with Haru in person. Better to just answer it.

"Oh, hey... Could you open the link I sent you? No, you don't have to sign up or anything. Thanks."

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"Ugh... Tell me how I'm supposed to sit through classes when I've been up since 4 AM? (yawn) I'm exhausted..."

well if you didn't stay up until 4am--oh who am i kidding i stayed up til like 3 watching a stream and reading datamine stuff and then I got up at like 6:30 to get ready for work I'm no better kekw.

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Ugh... I can't believe I'm hiding right now... Why the hell does that clown have to chase me around at lunch time too?"

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Preach about doing it for the sake of your friends or the animals or whatever all you want— I really don't give a shit. People who say that stuff are just deluding themselves."

i've known people with this kind of cynicism before. once he finds people care about him and a little more stability he'll come around a little more.

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Huh? I can't see that clown anywhere... Hell yes. Gonna get through my watch list. I hope he never comes back."

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I'm grinding this game on my phone, so could you not talk to me for a while? Crap, I think my RSI is flaring up..."

in Japanese he specifies tendonitis haha

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Don't people get embarrassed calling out those words when they use their stigmas? It makes them look like LARPers..."

in japanese he says they sound like they have chuunibyou which is much funnier imo lmao. also i guess that means he can say his in his head? since he'd feel embarrassed doing it aloud, maybe he's practiced already lol

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"You think I sigh a lot? Got a problem with that? You realize trying to take away people's freedom of speech is power harrassment, right?"

you're starting to sound like ritsu. gonna hurt yourself reaching like that.

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm so done... I'm out of HP... Shouldn't I be exempt from missions and classes since I'm looking after all those animals?"

well based on one of Haku's chats, you can just do missions if you don't go to class, and based on Kaito you can just go to class instead of doing missions. . .but I'm sure Haru forces him on missions anyway lol. . . .

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Pfft... The video of that clown getting attacked by that hawk thing is getting so many interacts. This editing thing's actually pretty fun."

does editing count as a creative effort? i wouldn't be surprised if he switched to Hotarubi next year if so, assuming he doesn't get used to Jabberwock and the animals. Also why didn't he get stopped by Sophy for uploading a video with an anomaly? Unless he uploaded it to an Institute social media site like WickHive or something. . . .

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Gotta change the locks so that clown can't get in again. I've bought enough padlocks to start my own business by now..."

life haru finds a way. sometimes that way is "towa, break down the door" if he runs out of lockpicking equipment.

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"My head's killing me... This is the worst... Rise and shine! my ass... It's basically still the middle of the night. Guess I should padlock my windows..."

5-6am I can understand being 'basically the middle of the night' but after that you're pushing it lmao

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"The cafeteria's way over capacity... The assholes who save seats before its even noon are ruining it for everyone else..."

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Why's my pay so low... huh? What's this deduction for? "Consultation Fee: Ritsu Shinjo..." He's seriously charging me for complaining...?"

Ritsu charges for looking at him too long. i'd try venting on wickhive over complaining to Ritsu.

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"That rabbit sure has it good. All it has to do is breathe and everyone fawns over it. Doesn't even have to feed itself. Just wait till it grows up and learns what the world's really like."

WELL BASED ON THAT THE ADULT PEEKABOO WAS STILL BEING FAWNED OVER AND HARU HAD TO STOP PEOPLE FROM PETTING IT BECAUSE IT BITES. . .IT'LL PROBABLY STILL HAVE IT GOOD. Haru takes good care of the animals.

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Sup... Huh? I'm alone today. I just got up on my own since if I don't that clown'll wake me up anyway."

yeah? it's because of haru? not because of your affinity with the pc being more than half so you wanna be up earlier to spend more time with them? sure.

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Oof, nearly missed the noon raid...  Not like I'll have any time to myself once I get back to the dorm, so I guess I should do it now..."

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"No, I'm not going to sleep yet. I'm gonna watch a horror B-movie. You don't have to think, so they're the perfect thing to watch before bed."

i used to watch/listen to mts3k to go to sleep so. i feel this.

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Well done me for surviving another day... Oh, same to you too, {PC}. I don't how you can do this stuff voluntarily."

SOME PEOPLE JUST LIKE ANIMALS DAWG.

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Huh? I'm going to the campus store to buy some stuff, where are you going? Well, I'm going that way, so...bye."

not sure if shy or asocial lmao. could be both!

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"You're being forced to help out again? Wow, a doormat out in the wild. So? Where do you want me to carry all this food?"

he's helping you even though he doesn't wanna work. HE'S GOT IT BAD.

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"This? It's a video I uploaded. People seem really into it. It's of that clown getting chased by a dog and flailing around like one of those inflatable air dancers."

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"What am I doing today? Working at the diner. Oh, if you want to keep me company, feel free to come by. As long as you serve yourself."

it's not a date or anything since he's at work but like. . .he is inviting you to hang out. . . .

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Huh? You were waiting for me to get off work? Oh... Thanks. Wait, that clown put you up to this?! I'm gonna kill him..."

NO NO WE CAME HERE WILLINGLY probably. although it does seem like Haru to be like "oh hey Ren really really likes you, you should go pick him up from work! he'd love that!!" like a real nosy mom who's trying to get his son together with his crush.

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"When did it get this late? That was horrifyingly fast... I'll walk part of the way back with you. I was gonna go buy something to drink anyway..."

excuses, excuses. . . .

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"Every day here is a fresh hell, sure, but... You're suffering through it with me, so I guess I'll stick it out a little longer..."

'this sucks but you make it suck a little(a lot) less so i can keep going'. yep, that's our tsundere alright!

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"That clown's even more slap-happy than usual lately—it's horrible. Has he got spring fever or something?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Otonashi keeps trying to make me drink some kind of rice porridge with weird flowers in it... It's actual porridge harassment."

considering the flower Towa associates with Ren is poisonous, i think it's safe to assume he is literally trying to poison him to death lmao. also wtf is porridge harassment--i even tried looking it up in japanese and the first thing that came up was someone screenshotting it and saying "what is porridge harassment" lolol

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"All this farm labor's bad enough without all the caterpillars and weird plants that are out there now...This is harassment."

what's harassing you, nature? as someone who just had to kill a huge mosquito that came into my room, nature is harassing me too.

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I hate cherry blossoms. They're like the flower version of being a legacy kid— all they have to do is bloom once a year and everyone claps."

in japanese what he says is something like 'i hate them just like people born with silver spoons in their mouths'. basically he hates people born into privilege lol i bet he'd have the potential to get along well with haku until he learns he'll be inheriting a shrine. . .then again he's getting along with Ritsu in their own little way

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"This is the worst... It's not even noon yet, how is it so hot? Summer is for extroverts and party animals, I wish it could just be over already..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"A group trip to the beach? I'd rather die. No decent person would ever go there of their own free will."

butbutbut. think of the summer skins!!!

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Summer was our busy period back home, so I always had to kill myself helping out. Now I'm here though... nothing's changed."

. . .did Ren's family run some sort of seaside shop??? And he happened to end up afraid of the ocean and hating aquatic creatures and such?

(between 8pm and 5am)

"How can the A/C be banned in the dorm...? Who gives a shit what temperature some anomalous animal that sneaks in prefers, humans should come first..."

okay i agree with him here though what the fuck kind of rule is that. can we talk to hyde about that, that's insane haru.

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"Now it's getting colder, I nearly found myself feeling grateful for this tragic jumpsuit... Am I being brainwashed...?"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Fall, the season of the harvest—I'll stick with cup noodles, thanks. "Fall, the season to enjoy the outdoors"—screw that. I'm gonna make it the season of naps."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Look—I got bitten by some weird bug anomaly. To hell with the stupid bug spray ban, I'm buying some."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I feel like the mountains are rowdier when there's a full moon. Pretty sure my enemy encounter rate goes up when I'm on patrol too... Maybe I'm just imagining it."

is 'enemy encounter rate' here referring to people or anomalies. . .because if it's people then that's just because of tsukimi. . .although I wouldn't be surprised if there were a lot of anomalies or anomalies were more active on full moons.

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"There's less patrols in winter but anything involving water like washing up gets even worse... Ugh, I wish I could hibernate too..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Since the climate in Jabberwock's so messed up, sometimes it's actually warm in winter. The blizzards are way stronger though..."

have you tried pissing towa off less?

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Oh god, I just saw what's in the diner's new Mystery Hot Pot... It's gotta be a matter of time before this place goes bust..."

i mean if they had ordinary health inspectors maybe lolol

(between 8pm and 5am)

"That clown broke my window so my room's like a freezer... Oh, don't worry. I just took his room instead."

lmao imagine Ren invites you to hang out and takes you to Haru's room instead of his like nah he broke my window so i'm using his room and he can freeze.

His birthday: (July 25th)

"You got this for me? That clown's been spreading my personal info around... No, it's fine, I'll still take it. Thanks."

i guess he doesn't really tell people his birthday, huh.

Your birthday:

"Happy birthday, {PC}. ...Isn't it kind of rude to look so surprised I'd celebrate your birthday? That came from the heart, you know."

I MEAN YOU NORMALLY DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING. . .it's happy surprise!!!

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year. My resolution? Escaping the hell hole that is Jabberwock, for starters."

well you got here in like September or something so. you've got a while befor eyou can switch houses lmao but you can do it this year!

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"You got me chocolates? You're the type who does all this kind of stuff, huh? No, it's fine, you went to the trouble and everything so I'll take them."

i love when characters kinda mock you for doing getting them something but then they're like "nonono i want it gimme--" lolol from Ren especially it's very tsundere. poor guy wouldn't be straightforward about his feelings unless a damn life was on the line.

White Day: (March 14th)

"{PC}... Here, if you want them. I just bought the first thing I saw, so don't read into it..."

i bet it's actually really nice lolol

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Guess what? I got special permission to switch houses. That nightmare is now behind me! I wish..."

Halloween: (October 31st)

"I hope everyone who gets excited about Halloween lives in misery for the rest of their lives. Why the hell do I have to help out with this stupid themed tour?"

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Can I ask you a question, {PC}? You don't still believe in Santa Claus, do you? Never mind, it doesn't matter. Have a good Christmas."

i mean. . .after coming here santa is a plausible entity to believe in. . .if there's gonna be a santa i don't wanna be caught not believing and missing out on gifts. . . .

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Where'd she go...? Whatever. Guess I'll catch up on some of my games."

(13 affinity and above)

"Pfft... This edit's awesome. I'm a genius. I'll show {PC} when she gets back."

true bonding is sharing the funny memes you worked hard on. . . .

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"It's not like I was waiting for you or anything. It's just this hell hole is even more unbearable when you're not around..."

YEP THAT'S OUR UNFORTUNATE CUSTOMER SERVICE EMPLOYEE TSUNDERE ALRIGHT. His lines don't really get super affectionate but. They still have a charm to them when you realize how much he hides his feelings in the usual tsundere way. He likes you a lot but like. . .it's a bother and it's embarrassing. . .and what're the chances you're into him? He'll just invite you over to watch movies and play games with him and stuff. . .and tell himself it's fine to just be friends until it eats away at him. . .or until Haru spills the beans for him--

this took way too long because i got distracted like three times in the middle and my laptop started freaking out and i had to figure out why and close and reopen everything about 8 times hahaha. . . . OKAY TIME FOR ME TO GO TO BED! I hope this satisfies you a little bit!!

[lennsart]

Hey hey hey you should talk about your blorbos

Should I ? :0 don't mind if I do !

So. LEGEND LEGEND LEGEND—

Sorry. But uh. Headcanons time !

I'm gonna talk about headcanons I have for him and the way I write him, so. If it sounds ooc, no it doesn't. He personally told these things to me

- And this warning is mostly for this one, but Legend is like a cat to me, in the sense that : he loves affection. He will melt into any hug. He sleeps better when he's held. Will he ask for it, though ? Fuck no, he'd rather die, get away from him (please pat his head)

- I think he started adventuring really young. I often put him at 9 or 10 in Alttp, mostly for drama value ngl, but also so that he can realistically be the veteran without needing for him to do one quest after the other without breaks. Get this poor guy some time to process a little... Not nearly enough, but still, a little !

- His uncle did come back after he wished for it with the Triforce, but... I don't think you can come back from the dead without consequences. I think he'll be ill and die either before Link's Awakening or Triforce Heroes— games where we see Link going on a quest by his own design. He needed to get away from his home for a while.

It's not all bad, though, and they had time to say goodbye at least ! And Uncle was glad to come back, not going to make it a 'came back wrong' horror story lmao—

- Ok, a funnier : ever since the dark world, bunnies actually follow Legend wherever he goes. I do have a one shot idea on this one, but to summarize : he can't say he likes this quirk because the bunnies do remind him of his dark world form, but also... They're bunny rabbits. They're adorable. He cuddles them in secret. No one must know

- On that note, I like to think that bunnies are Ravio's special interest. Like, there aren't any in Lorule anymore, but there were books about it and he read them all... and when he came to Hyrule, he absolutely lost his shit.

If you add this to the 'bunnies follow Legend' previous thing, he absolutely abuses from this ability to pet bunnies. He gave names to the regular visitors. He's living his dream !

...Dang, I'm sure I have more but my brain is kinda fried, so that's all I got for now. Hope you liked it ? Thank you so much for the ask, such a nice surprise ! :D

[selfinserttothestars]

I apparently wrote this on July 4th of last year. It’s almost been a full year since I started playing Twisted Wonderland and that’s wild to me. I just live here now lmao anyway here’s wonderwall—

•

It was unusual for her not to leave her last class of the day without at least Deuce by her side but there was some important Heartslabyul meeting that he and Ace had to attend. They couldn’t be late and Chris was understanding of this. Riddle would have their heads if he was in a bad enough mood, and no one wanted to risk anymore of that. Jack had a different class than the trio for their last period, so Chris was walking on her own. The hallway wasn’t complete empty as there were students sprinkled around here and there minding their business, but it was much less crowded than it was throughout the day. Chris hummed a tune as she carried what had been dubbed “the bubble” on her back. It was just a cat carrier for Grim to sit in, but calling it “the bubble” was much funnier. Grim would normally complain about the bubble and just how humiliating it was for a “great mage” to be carried around in such a thing, but today he was quiet. Chris had to keep him awake until the final bell but once he was free to rest he didn’t hesitate. Grim slept peacefully to the muffled sounds of Chris’s tune and the gentle sway of her paces. It was nice for both of them. Chris was slow to walk down a set of stairs so not to disturb the sleepy creature and jostle him awake, but each step made her lag behind most of her schoolmates. Eventually everyone seemed far enough away that she felt safe enough to bring her humming to quiet singing. Someone would have to be fairly close to hear her words.

”Cruel and cold like winds on the sea,

Will you ever return to me?”

Since her latest Crowley-assigned-odd-job regarding the Housewarden of the Octavinelle Dorm, she’d been recalling ocean related songs. Having been in the ocean for a while had really brought out her inner siren… or something. She couldn’t recall how she knew the handful of shanties that she did, but there was really no point in fretting about it. They sounded nice, so why not sing them when given the chance.

“Over waves and deep in the blue,

I will give up my heart for you.”

Chris turned the corner without looking. It had already become muscle memory for her, so she hardly had to check where she was going. She knew her way out of the school and to her dorm. It was almost mindless at this point. So much so that she hardly noticed her own footsteps.

Or anyone else’s.

”Come my love, be one with the sea.

Rule with me for eternity.”

Suddenly the song, along with her steps were briskly put to a halt. She’d bumped into someone when her guard was down but quickly snapped back to reality, stumbling back in the process.

“Sorry! I’m sor—“

She looked up to see an all too familiar figure turn to look at her.

Floyd.

“Was that you, shrimpy?” He mused, a smile spreading across his face. He laughed as his twin, only a few steps ahead of him, turned to see what had just happened.

Jade.

Both of them.

“Are you two alright?” The other boy asked, stepping back to be as uncomfortably close to Chris as his brother. She felt as though she had rapidly shrunk. There was no ill will between them, but Chris couldn’t shake the feeling of danger she felt whenever they approached. This time she was alone. No one could save her.

“Did you hear shrimpy?” Floyd asked, turning to his brother. “He was singing!”

“That was him?” Jade asked, bemused by the idea.

Chris didn’t dare make a sound.

“Yeah! Maybe Azul shoulda had him give his voice as collateral instead of the dorm when they made that contract.” Floyd laughed at his own joke, but this only reinforced the fear that was already brewing inside of Chris. Jade finally turned his attention to her.

Oh no.

“What my brother means to say is: you have a lovely voice.” He began. “Besides, we’d have no practical use for it.”

Not as reassuring as he might have thought, but there wasn’t much that either of them could say that could convince Chris not to run at the first chance she’d get.

“But you heard him right?” Floyd said, getting his brother’s attention again. “He almost sounded like a—“

Somewhere a pair of lightbulbs flickered on, illuminating what was once hidden.

Girl. Chris sounded like a girl.

The duo looked back at Chris only to see that she was already darting back around the corner she came from. They could hear Grim’s muffled shouting from his bubble, as he was definitely awake now. She was a good distance away by the time the two wordlessly agreed to go after her. They had so many questions now, and there was always a bit of fun to a chase, right?

“Wait up!”

“Come back!”

•

Also for anyone who’s wondering, this is the bubble:

[kcrabb88]

I finished drafting my 5 QuinObi week fics, and I'm super happy with all of them. Like last year, funnily enough, my first two are on the funnier/cuter side, and days 3-5 are more Dramatic in varied ways (angsty, hurt/comfort, sad, in that order lmao). Right now though, I have this passage from day 3's Because the Night spinning around in my head:

“Hypocrite,” Quin snaps. “Doesn’t the shiny holonet star have something better to do with his time than chase after his lowly spy boyfriend?”  

Obi-Wan's cheeks burn red, and his blue eyes, gleaming with unshed tears, narrow. That dark storm that Quin has under control brews wild in his chest. He craves the man in front of him and the light always trailing at his heels.  The low blow of his own making swoops hot in his stomach.  

“Oh yes,” Obi-Wan seethes with more sarcasm than should fit in anyone’s body, “you sound so very like yourself. Nothing’s wrong at all. I have no idea why I’m here.”   

Despite the harsh words, grief beats in Obi-Wan's Force presence. Quin put that grief there, but there’s nothing, nothing he can do about it now.   

He has to do what he’s doing. To find Sidious, he must. Obi-Wan will understand after it's over. He always does.  

“I’m sorry, okay? I mean that. But you need to go. Leave. Before you get hurt and/or blow my cover. I'm serious, Obes.”   

“No," Obi-Wan says with a gentle anger that makes Quin want to sob. "I will not go without you. And if you think I--”   

Quinlan closes the small gap between them. He fists his hand into Obi-Wan's shirt and kisses him full on the mouth. Obi-Wan returns the kiss with that sharp-sweet tang that is as familiar to Quin as his own reflection in the mirror. Obi-Wan pulls away. His eyes narrow again in the low light of the ship’s entryway, and he exhales a tender breath.   

And he kisses Quin again.   

[wendy130]

heard you were looking for fake fic titles, so we got some for you!!!

Cast Out

On the Hunt

Ghost Chasers

Reality Sucks

Roll Call

Apocalyptic Nightmares

“Is anyone there?!”

// I did only a few of these bc otherwise this would get too long :P

// Cast Out, Ghost Chasers, & Apocalyptic Nightmares

Cast Out

—

Fish hunter- angler? I don't know but fish hunter sounds funnier-- Wilbur goes out everyday to catch fish. One day he catches a lobster hybrid Niki who is Not happy with being trapped inside a net. Thankfully, Wilbur hands her a fish and tosses her back into the sea.

But now every time he goes out to fish, Niki 'unluckily' gets caught again and again...

// This is entirely based on some dudes on YT who hunt for lobsters but throw back lobsters they can't keep. They give those lobsters some fish before yeeting them back into the sea :3

—

Ghost Chasers-- my fucking favorite out all of these has been moved to an entirely different post which you can find here!

—

Apocalyptic Nightmares

—

Disclaimer: I have no idea how blindness actually affects people on a day to day basis. This will not be accurate. And I have no idea how to write these characters either lmao.

It’s hard going through the apocalypse while you’re blind, but Dream has been… handling it fairly well, he’d like to think. 

Especially when that apocalypse is based purely on sight. Any human that looks at the- he’s not sure what to call it, honestly- the beasts go insane. He’s taken to calling them ‘Medusas’ because he’s fairly certain that, before everything went to shit, there was a story of some lady that would turn people to stone if they looked at her. He’s not sure. It sounds fake, to be honest, but he stumbled across another human who told him about it. They said it was… ‘Greek mythical,’ or something.

Regardless, he’s been able to move around with the walking stick he’s had since forever. Plus, since his eyesight is non-existent, his other senses have strengthened to make up for the lack of one less processor. Some days are… shit, to be frank. He’s dropped his cane and had to fumble around to find it, and that’s not even considering the rest of the disadvantages that come with being blind. 

He has.. no idea how he’s been able to survive. He thinks it’s luck. Whatever it is, it’s the only thing that’s been keeping him alive for so long. He’s thankful for that. 

And he’s even more thankful when he hears the rare shuffle of feet. It looks like he’s finally stumbled across another person- or… monster. Whatever, it’s company, even if the monster can’t talk back to him. Most of the time when there’s a monster, they end up wandering off and not responding to him. It’s how he knows who’s human or not.

Turning towards the sound, he lifts his head when the shuffling freezes, “hello?” he calls out, hoping that they’re human. 

After a clear hesitant pause, “hello?” And, oh! Finally, another person. He smiles.

“Hey! Great to finally come across another human,” he hears mumbling, but it’s incomprehensible. He shifts slightly to face the voice a little more, “sorry, if you couldn’t tell, I’m, uh, blind,” he laughs.

“Oh,” the voice still sounds.. confused, “uh. Yeah. I couldn’t… tell.” Dream pauses, tilting his head.

“Do you not know what being blind is?” It’s the apocalypse, it… would make sense that people might not know about it, he supposes. The voice is silent, and he quickly adds, “it’s okay. It’s the apocalypse, I get it. Information is a little scarce. I basically just can’t see. My name is Dream, by the way. What’s yours?”

”My.. name? Oh. My name. My name isss… George. It’s George,” the voice seems to fumble, and he laughs a little.

“Are you sure? It kinda seems like you just made that up, George,” he emphasized teasingly, feeling the edge of his mouth twitch up in amusement, “I guess that makes sense, though. I don’t come across people that often either, so it takes a second to remember that greeting people is a common courtesy.”

“Y..yeah,” the voice- George- laughs, a tad awkwardly, “yeah, it takes a little bit to remember how to speak, y’know?”

//

Dream meets George, who’s… not as human as he seems. But, hey, Dream doesn’t need to know that.

Basically, shenanigans between the two bc George is used to just driving humans insane and never exactly having company. No less company that doesn’t shut the fuck up. Dream gets someone who can make life a little bit easier, George gets to learn what it’s like to be human, and both of them get to have some well-needed company.

[basicallyjaywalker]

For the ask game >:3 ✂️❤️

🎨 I know you have OC’s but I know embarrassingly little for being a mutual this long. Hand them over rook :)

Edit: I forgot to say hi 😭 sorry I saw you mentioned OCs and literally just. mind blank got the zoomies started stimming forgot my manners. Anyways

Hello Oli :DDD

One thing I would change: I mean. I would rewrite a lot of the series but mainly I would wanna give Nya a more prominent and starring role early on. Let her have more Samurai X moments and quit putting her on the sidelines while the boys do things!!

Favorite ship? Canonically Pixane ngl. I love Jaya but Pixane is soulmate coded for me I break Jaya up at the drop of a hat for funsies I feel bad breaking up Pixane.

Do I have OCs? You're goddamn right I do I have wayyyyyy too many. I'm working on character sheets for the main ones now but until those are uploaded have a taste!

Nataly Chumsworth: Master of Love, half Serpentine, menace to society. If the name did not clue you in she's Pythor's daughter and they have. A relationship.

Roxie Andrews: Master of Peace, local stressed out mom friend, former student at Marty Oppenheimer's! Old friend of Cole's and someone i imagine Nya being besties with.

Jasmine Bucket/Julien: Master of Nature (secondary: Ice), engineer at Borg Industries, made before Bolobo I swear. Zane's half sister but neither has any clue about that yet

Jackie Fei: Master of Magic (I have a whole system set up for this), chronically tired and depressed but gets to have a glow-up, chaotic good incarnate. My favoritest little blorbo ngl

Hannah Stone: Master of Music (different from sound and again swear she was pre-S4), punk rock girl, Chen's former... student is not the right term. Embodiment of that one audio: "they got their weapon, I got cheated out of my childhood)

Kyle Stone: not an elemental master but a former member of Chen's cult kinda (born into it), instead of masking his trauma with anger like Hannah he masks it with bubbliness, chronic overprotective disease. He and Hannah aren't blood related but they're also the closest thing to family each other has

Master Twyla: Master of Light, the teacher of these fucking kids, trying her best to keep the memory of the former EMs alive. Bops her on the head this bad girl can fit soooooo much trauma she's trying to overcome in her, goddamn

Ivy Crest: Master of Wind except not fully until S5 (thanks Morro), Morro's bio daughter and Ronin's adopted daughter (bet you can't guess who she prefers), expert in forgery and shit at mechanics. She and Nya form a close bond in S5 and Nya continues to try and teach her mechanical stuff (it does not work)

Luna McCallister/Garmadon: Master of Dreams, long lost Garmadon daughter who?, big fucking nerd. I have no idea when she and Lloyd realize their related but it makes their interactions at the comic store beforehand a lot funnier (for reference: she is about 2 years older than him)

Jonathan Borg: heir to Borg Industries, curious about the supernatural elements of Ninjago, knows about something he probably shouldn't. His place is not fully figured out yet but I feel like he's gonna start wanting to prove more useful after S7 to mixed results, esp bc his sister is way cooler than him

Willow Whispernight: yeah check back later chief I am reworking her ENTIRE lore lmao. Currently also connected with nature in some way and Jasmine's step-sister

Ahahaha that isn't even all of them. it's been over a decade I am soooo normal. I do not have *checks notes* approximately 20 OCs, named and unnamed, with various places in stories and development

[hannahlovesluca]

Hi can i get a nijisanji matchup if u dont mind (:

Male nijisanji en member :DD

Pronouns:He/him(literally any of those)

Sexuality:Gay for the homies....jk im bisexual.But men.My favorite genre of men is men who seems cool-headed but turns hot-headed whenever he plays amongus cause they're so fun to annoy(i may not have a type,but i have a pattern.and that's men.That's it.I'm so sorry for putting you through this but this sounded funnier in my head)

Zodiac:...what is a zodiac.I was born on April 12th if that helps?

Appearance:176 cm,almost a literal twig(i make up strength with agility i swear),dark brown eyes,short fluffy(?) brown hair??like those kinda wavy hair thing tho sometimes i tuck my bangs behind my ear like a disney princess if the temperature's hot,i don't neccesarily wear edgy clothes,sometimes i just find what's comfortable or i dress like a manhwa male lead.One day you see me in a black turtleneck and white shirt and the next day you see me in a blown up two piece suit while playing the most random stuff ever.I guess i have like a small waist??my friends told me i have those thin waists than even a corset wouldn't affect me(send help) oh and i had an era where i had waist length hair and ended up cutting it out of impulse,i only have like 3 fingers on my left hand cause im missing a pinky and ring finger(i honestly dont have any trouble against it i just think its annoying that i cant remember what even happened to begin with)

Mbti:ENTP/INTP(sometime si get entp sometimes i get intp)

Personality:Pain in the ass.Metaphorically.I will not hesitate to say something so abominably horrendous for the sake of arguing cause it's my favorite passtime.I'm the embodiment of that one character who never dies in a series and die at the end of the series from a tapeworm cause it felt lonely--On super duper rare occasions i get serious when it comes to problems but that's just a whole nother person atp,i'd be serious and maybe waaaaay too logical and blunt....but i still have a sense of humor tho

Likes:When people just randomly ramble to me,random 3 am shower thoughts,crabs(they taste good i swear),the concept of death(not in the depressing way i meant as in 'what if i die from a washing machine while showering' type of thoughts),physical touch and affection,i'd literally propose to someone if they'd let me doodle(rick astley) on their skin for funsies

Dislikes:Curfews,this thing we call math,toxic parents like if i see one im deadass gonna roast the hell out of them and mentally adopt the child(this happened like 3 times and im a children magnet atp)

Love language:

Giving:Words of affirmation(affectionate insults),physical touch

Receiving:Words of affirmation(affectionate insults),quality time

Extra:I get hurt kind of often so they'd probably see bandage rolls in the trashcan everyday,i actually love math but the act of actually counting the numbers makes me sick/lh,my room is a literal shipwreck unless someone scolds me to actually clean up my room LMAO usually i have to keep up a reputation so sometimes it's a shock to people that think that im introverted

i pair you with…

Uki Violeta!

hear me out…

• you are literally uki reincarnated

• i swear i didnt do this just because both of you are gay

• it works out great though

• you and fulgur probably jokingly fight for uki’s love

• omg imagine you went on Luca’s dating show and thats how you both realized that you loved each other

• might be writing a fic ab that…

• Uki knows your room is a wreck and he will FORCE you to clean that shit. he’ll also help u if u beg enough

• Uki also knows how often you get hurt and he’s always there to help, whether that be wrapping you up, or just giving you soft kisses <3

• HE LOVES UR HAIR!!!!!

• its just so fluffy and cute and adorable and

• sorry this is really short, i am extremely sick but i’m trying to pop out all these reqs!!!

RUNNERS UP: Fulgur Ovid, Claude Clawmark

[endiness]

the batman lb

~

okay, i guess i'll reserve my commentary to a lb now instead of spamming.

when is a batman property gonna be brave enough to make alfred posh again. bruce pulling the "you're not my real dad" card on alfred. like, legitimately, is this supposed to be a comedy. how did people watch this in theatres and not crack the FUCK up, it is beyond me.

you have THREE hours. why are you speedrunning the cypher. like, why is this so fast paced? WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THE REST OF THE TIME IN THIS MOVIE IF THIS IS HOW YOU'RE SPENDING IT NOW. I AM CONCERNED. when this movie isn't unintentionally funny, it's just boring. i mean, why else would you just take a thumb? obvs it would be used to unlock something, duh. also, like, what'd you think was gonna happen putting that mystery usb into your computer? maybe put it into a burner with no personal information and network connection on it next time, maybe.

WHY'D YOU MAKE HIS BOOTS SO STUPIDLY STOMPY. IT SOUNDS FUCKING DUMB. also it just makes me think clang, clang, thunk, scrape. it'd be funnier if this were some bdsm club and then batman would come in and nobody would bat (hehe) an eyelash at his outfit choice. HEY, GUYS, DID YOU KNOW THIS CHICK IS CATWOMAN? LOOK AT ALL THE CATS. DO YA GET IT? DO YA GET IT??? everything about this batcat scene is bad and dumb. also, they don't have chemistry.

why is the place SO destroyed. there's TOO MUCH evidence. it's the riddler? are sure? are you sure you aren't mr jigsaw man? are you really certain? LMAO IT'S LITERALLY JUST JIGSAW THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING. THAT EVERYTHING IN THIS MOVIE IS PLAYED COMPLETELY STRAIGHT. "you got a lot of cats." yeah, duh, bruce. how else would we know she's catwoman. the audience is completely stupid and has to have everything spelled out to them, don't you know anything? (the sad thing is that's true. people ARE that stupid these days. ugh, why'd y'all have to ruin it for the rest of us with brains.)

"they injected him with arsenic." "rat poison." also known as: poison. "what kind of demented sob does this to a person?" jigsaw! :) oh sorry, did you want me to say riddler? but i don't see him anywhere 🤷‍ anyway, remember when jim carrey was riddler. that was at least fun, wasn't it. the complete lack of batcat chemistry lmao. I'M NOT EVEN AN HOUR INTO THIS MOVIE 😭 hey, y'know what makes up for a total lack of chemistry? the old bickering married couple trope, especially for characters that've known each other for like 5 seconds. jk, that's bad. don’t do that. selina would be more interesting if she were just her own character and not selina or catwoman and also if this movie would let her exclusively be about her friend and not, like, batcat nonsense.

when the riddler isn't jigsaw'ing it up he's brainy'ing it up. (y'know, brainy. from hey arnold.) the riddler just blunt force trauma'ing all his victims is so funny. like, i've watched criminal minds. i know that means you're just a coward. especially since you have to get them all when their backs are turned. coward. like, legit, are you supposed to find the riddler in this intimidating? because he isn't. he's funny when he's lurking behind people as if that's somehow supposed to be scary when it isn't, and he's hilarious when he's smashing people's heads in because he must have so non-existent self-esteem that's the only way he feels comfortable enough to attack people, and then he's also funny when he's trying to be the riddler because you're actually just coming up with saw traps. I'M STILL NOT EVEN AN HOUR INTO THIS MOVIE.

oh yay, forcing this batcat narrative despite them having no chemistry. and selina genuinely being a better character far, far away from him. also, you have to keep up appearances beCAUSE YOU NEED A COVER STORY, YOU BAFOON. joker did everything about this better. full offense but pattinson's bruce sucks. he's so boring and awkward. and like, not in a good way like how bruce should be. 'cause he should be a lil awkward. but he should at least be able to FAKE being mr eligible bachelor man, if literally only for appearance and cover's story sake. the bruce in this feels like everybody interviewed about him after he has been convicted of being batman would go "yeah, that kid was always a fuckin' weirdo, i ain't surprised at all." JOKER DID EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS BETTER, FFS.

i'd get out of there. a smart person would've made that car a bomb. i guess making the person inside of it is the same thing. this is so fucking boring, honestly. 🙄 AND I'VE STILL 2 HOURS LEFT. clang, clang, thunk, scrapeeeee. batman has come to uh... untape. that man's mouth. "*heavy breathing*" IT'S BRAINY, Y'ALL! no, you're nygma. e nygma. edward nygma. lmao, joker did all of this so much better. this movie is SO embarrassing. really, i'd have thought since you were a child, you loved the saw movie franchise. 🤷‍ bruce, i don't think you're supposed to be helping him cheat. but is riddler gonna call you out or. is that gonna happen when you get to the third one and bruce has answered them all for you. oh, that didn't happen. lame.

the idea that batman would somehow survive a point blank explosion to his face when it took off the other guy's head who he was literally right next to when the bomb exploded... now you've broken my immersion on top of everything else. if you're going to be afraid of somebody high up on the food chain in a corrupt justice system, i'd think you've be afraid of like... the mayor? not whoever the fuck that guy is. OHMYGOD, JIM IS FAKING INTERROGATING BATMAN????? WHO??? COULD HAVE FORSEEN??? THIS??????? does the movie think this looks cool? i hope it knows it looks lame.

somebody add that whip noise effect for how often this scene is switching between coverage of bruce and jim lmao. why doesn't batman just upload all of this evidence to like tiktok or something. modern day technology exists in this iteration. he's actually being extremely ineffective as batman by not doing that. STOP PRETENDING THAT BATCAT IN THIS HAVE CHEMISTRY. THEY DON'T. shouldn't bruce be like brain dead with how many successive concussions that he's had at this point. bruce revving his engine like this is somehow supposed to be intimidating... embarrassing. i must have THE most bored expression on my face watching this chase scene. LOOK IT'S THE SCENE FROM HEAVY RAIN! how does this scene have any stakes. did anybody watch this and care about what was happening. i mean i guess now there's stakes that poor innocent people are being sucked in this clusterfuck lol. but i mean for the main characters? eh, who cares. oh look the car is flipping, you can tell because it's that shot of the stuff in the car goin’ nuts. LOOK HOW COOL BATMAN LOOKS UPSIDE DOWN IN THE RAIN WITH THE FIRE AND HIS STOMPY STOMPY BOOTS. HE'S SUPER COOL, RIGHT GUYS? AND WITH THE SUPER COOL MUSIC PLAYING? WE MADE A GOOD MOVIE, RIGHT? that's what i assume the people who made this movie were thinking.

when i can even take them saying the riddler seriously i just hear method man saying the riddler. *takes a 3min dance break for the song* i'm not joking, i took a break to listen that song. OH THANK CHRIST. i am halfway through this movie. THE EVIL IS 50% DEFEATED. 🎶 THE RIDDLAR 🎶 this movie is soooooo bad lol. i mean el also means god. is that gonna be a thing lol. remember when jon glover voiced the riddler. that was fun, wasn't it? remember when lost did this bit with the old school technology? that was fun, wasn't it? THE TOWER? THE TOWER THAT JEREMIAH DESIGNED? is that what you're talking about? okay, but fr, why is there an HOUR AND A HALF OF THIS MOVIE LEFT.

ohno, bruce, you've put alfred in danger by existing AND after you've already pulled the "you're not my dad" card on him. that's sad, huh. "i'm afraid it already has, sir." dory is hilarious. unintentionally. please explain how alfred is doing so poorly despite at least THROWING THE BOMB AWAY FROM HIM but meanwhile bruce survived a fucking point blank explosion. POINT BLANK. LITERALLY RIGHT FUCKING NEXT TO HIM. like, you can either have realism or fantastical. YOU HAVE TO PICK ONE. YOU CAN'T HAVE BOTH SOMETIMES AND OTHER TIMES NOT. every time this movie thinks it's being cool my eyes just roll. 🙄

THEY DON'T HAVE CHEMISTRY. STOP. everything about this is getting lamer and lamer 🙄 THERE'S STILL OVER AN HOUR LEFT. i mean, the joker also thought bruce's parents were his when they weren't. did you get a dna test done or. why's it so laaaaaaaaaame. why are they kissing. this doesn't make sense. ugH. now, you could make this acceptable if she stole shit off of him.

"martha was in and out of asylums" joker!martha canon??? okay. i highly dislike this version of bruce. he is just *sad trombone noise* i don't want *sad trombone noise* for a bruce. ...didn't i play this scene in a batman game or something. why is the plot for this just jumping everywhereeeeeeeee. *sad trombone noise* is so boring. all of the wayne manor designs (sans gotham) have been bad since 90s batman ended. 💅 bruh, he just woke up. calm down. what, you did nothing for your mom? RUDE. ....i miss when alfred got to be posh. i do not accept any of you non-posh alfreds. 🙈 this scene is so touching. is what somebody would say who is possibly easily manipulated i guess. not me though.

i just. do not like this selina. there are only two selina's for me and they are from batman returns and btas. why would you do this plot and make everything so boring when you could've just done white knight. except whoever made this would've just made that boring too. "come on, vengeance." pls stop. literally every time this movie is like look how cool this is, it's just the lamest shit ever.

now it's like you're trying to copy batman returns but like. you have to know batman returns did it better, right. right. if all of you stopped monologuing, you'd solve all of your problems. like, at all. instead of not at all. omg, she scratched him. like a cat. get it. 'cause she's catwoman. GET IT. DO YOU GET IT. everything about this is just the lamest. i mean, batman's secretly recording everything he sees and hears so perhaps not. THERE'S STILL ALMOST A FUCKING HOUR LEFT.

i was going to make a joke about the riddler sniping falcone but i guss it wasn't a joke, huh. i hope it is the riddler who shot him because that makes actually no fucking sense whatsoever. so it's perfect for this movie! remember how fun the riddler's place was in batman forever and they played bad days by the flaming lips? that was fun, wasn't it? ohmygod, is he drawing a question mark in his cappuccino or whatever. because that'd just be. so clever of this movie. so clever and creative. i am not at all being sarcastic. IT'S THE ONE THAT SAYS E NYGMA. AS IN NYGMA. EDWARD NYGMA. oh, movie, you're just oh so creative and clever to have him draw a question mark in his coffee. i'm so super duper impressed by you and your storytelling skills!

no, his name is edward nygma. "suffocating my mind no escape" yeah yeah cut my life into pizza, we get it. "he's got like 500 followers." i have a lot more followers than that. on tumblr. tumblr. wow, is it: I'M GONNA SAY WHO BATMAN IS. i, for one, would gladly have this be the end of THE batman. 'cause this movie is bad and you're a bad lame-o batman, full offense.

...is that collar a joke, because you could easily slip it over your head. like, it's much larger than his head. okay, so on top of being jigsaw and brainy, he's also literally just stanley coleman too? dumb. man, you know things in places like this are recorded, right? or did you stop the cameras? kinda looks like they're still recording so uh, you're kinda already fucked. where's the joker to pop in a bitchslap the fuck out of riddler and be like "WE ALL KNOW HE'S BRUCE, YOU MORON. YOU'RE RUINING THE GAME WITH BATMAN FOR THE REST OF US." the joker did this way better. 🙄 WHY THE FUCK IS THERE STILL OVER 30 MINS OF THIS MOVIE LEFT. why'd people give joker so much shit when this movie and character exists lol. bruh, are you faking this or like everything in this movie: is this supposed to be unironically played straight. let's fast forward outta this scene already pls.

i am at the point where if i could run this movie at 2x speed, i would be already. alas, i cannot. now you're just stealing from jeremiah and gotham. LAME. literally every single thing this movie is copying... everything else did it better lol. jeremiah already did this and he's so much cooler this is so unfair 😤 LITERALLY GOTHAM ALREADY DID THIS AND IT WAS SO MUCH COOLER UGH. also, like, year one/zero year was the inspiration for both, right. BUT GOTHAM LEGITIMATELY DID THIS BETTER AND COOLER.

ohno, the dumbass mayor who thinks she knows better than everyone else got shot. how terrible. also, i totally have emotional investment in all of this characters and not. literally none. oh yay, it's the look how cool batman is fight scenes. yay. waiting for the moment when batman gets saved by catwoman 'cause this is super lame and that's one of the lamest things that could happen. oh i'm sub 30 mins, yay! this random villain taking for fucking ever to just shoot batman when he could've just shot him. lame. also, hey, catwoman stopped him and saved batman. who could have forseen this totally not lame turn of events.

remember when the joker and batman were bleeding out and their blood was making a broken heart on the ground. anyway, that was more romantic than this nonsense. so now he's just using magic juice to pump himself up? lmao. what even is this. "i'm vengeance." yeah, it sounds lame af doesn't it. i know that's not the real reason. but it should be. isn't the entire city there getting deded lol. LMAO ARE YOU FOR REAL. THIS IS SO FUCKING LAME. like, your epic "oh batman dies" moment is him being a fucking moron and cutting an electrical wire to stop it from electrocuting people except THEN you fucking chicken out and don't even have him die (or ‘die’)? EVEN THOUGH YOU SHOT IT AS A DEATH SCENE MOMENT. HOW MUCH FUCKING LAMER CAN THIS MOVIE GET, JESUS. all tea all shade all offense but batfleck did this better. look at how ~emotional and ~moving this scene is. totally not schlocky as hell. wait, was that the dumbass mayor who's there? who got shot? bitch, you're gonna die in those waters. your wound is getting super infected. that's sad huh.

OH YAY THE EMO MUSIC STARTS. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO COME ON WE'VE RETURNED TO THE RORSCHACH VOICE OVER NARRATIONS?????????? THIS IS SO SAD FOR YOU. I'M SO EMBARRASSED FOR YOU. THIS IS REALLY PATHETIC, Y'ALL. ugh, when is this gonna be over. somebody soundproof the riddler's cell. YOU CAN'T SUCK ME IN WITH BATJOKES. I WON'T FALL FOR THIS. is this how it's gonna end. on them. having no chemistry.  "you're already spoken for." YEAH, BY THE JOKER. i mean, not this batman. he's *sad trombone noise* and deserves no jokers. but like, batmans in general. they are all spoken for. (by the joker.) all you have to do is end the movie and you're still making it lame. YAY, IT'S OVER. I'M FREE. anyway, gotham did all of this, everything in this movie, but better. go watch gotham. 💅

[nerdyenby]

Orange time :D I’m watching Callum

Pregame

HBomb94 now wanted for murder, good for him ig

“That’s it, I’m taking matters into my own hands” terrifying, thanks Pete

Why is Callum talking about the availability of drugs in the United Kingdom???

I don’t even know how many people are in this call but all of them are bullying Callum lmao

“Habomba!!!” “It wasn’t me” “It says it was you!” “It’s a lie” “oh, sorry” them <333

Tubbo showing up and causing chaos is just as funny the second time

Tubbo realizing it’s May is even funnier the second time, I’m losing it

“Tubbo’s gone now” he’s freaking dead

Scott is such a guy, he has the intimidation factor while still being irrevocably likable

“That was the most eventful pre-MCC I’ve ever had” fr, I loved it so much

Tubbo gave Callum his stream key 😭😭😭

“Gotta be honest, I need your friendship more than I need $5k” and everyone going ‘um actually…’ 😂

Sausage asking to be sand daddy just because he wants to be called “daddy” 😂😂😂

WHAT is Shane and Callum’s dynamic here /pos

Rocket Spleef

Sausage’s explanation of his understanding isn’t wrong but it just sounds so off lol

Them just slandering all the other Minecraft events is so real, I’m sure they’re great but they’ll never be MCC <333

Everything Kara says gives Callum a flashback lol

Callum popped off!!

The MCC meta of alcohol 😂😂😂

The way the “reafy” predicting who won the game was actualy accurate

The way I didn’t think of Sausage and Callum as being in the same sphere but they have nearly the same friend group

We love them appreciating the lore :))

TGTTOSAWAF

Callum throwing his chicken in the middle being the deciding vote lmao

“I got 7th, thanks Shane” so true

Callum did so good for having never seen the map before

Yo Sausage!!!!

Tgttosawaf worst game real, it’s still good but comparatively it’s the least enjoyable

Sausage improving every round my beloved <333

Kara plotting revenge, as she should

Shane top three every time??? He’s inshane!!

When you put on the suit (purpled skin) you take on a burden greater than yourself (getting targeted)

Kara and Sausage noooooo

Your vote matters, Shane, cmon

Parkour Warrior

Graphic appreciation is so based <333

Shane’s keyboard 😭😭😭

The Hannah Montana movie reference lol

Whatever the heck Shane and Callum’s dynamic is, it’s everything

I know I’ve heard Sausage’s normal voice before but it caught me so off guard there lmao

It’s disgusting how easy this is for Callum

Finally, someone talking about the bees

HES DISGUSTING!!! /pos

HES TOO GOOD AT THE GAME!!!!

Kara 😂

The points are a lil silly, we move

Grid runners is not skippable, how dare you

Parkour Tag

Callum chickening out 😂😂😂

Sausage is giving such good comms!!

Nevermind lol

It sure is… going!!

Gosh darn it, when you see a “biggest comeback” breakdown blame Shane and Callum

I will NOT stand for this gr slander

Grid Runners

It’s not pronounced “boy,” there’s a u there for a reason lol

They’re killing it!!!

Kara accidentally cheating is killing me 😂

Those prison comms!!!!

First in Uppies!!!

“We’re so smart and big brain and maybe handsome” “We’re so handsome” so true sausage :))

One of my favorite things coming out of this MCC is everyone counting on the builders to know how to use scaffolding and them just saying “no, it SUCKS”

Consistency pog

Ok yeah, I just do not understand grid scoring

Callum’s predictions only take Ls

Kara and Shane having banger opinions

Meltdown

Shane leaking the script, rip

They played that so well!!

Callum jumping right into the lava lol

Head pat exchange at Vidcon Paris fr

Blue just appearing behind them was terrifying

Kara popping off!!!

Shane’s Kermit impression my beloved

Stay with the team Callum 😭😭😭

Purpled popping off

Survival Games

They just be makin’ sounds, so based of them tbh

“Your choice, you know I’ll follow you to the ends of the earth” Callum and Shane sure are dudes, pals even

HOW did Callum make it out of that alive lmao

“We were tenth and we’re not tenth anymore” “There’s still time, king!!” so true

Sands of Time

Shane stopping everything to say hi HBomb, so based

Callum they/them truthing Kara??

Callum “All Things MCC” PK didn’t know there’s a grace period with the sand timer? L /lh

How is he so bad at sot

I love Callum, I swear, he’s just so easy to make fun of

Sausage has such good comms for a first time sand keeper :))

They have so much sand what the heck

It is physically painful how many times Callum has looked directly at that one piece of sand

I love all the field trips this MCC, so many groups traveling together :D

The carpet trails in this blu path are insane, I’d love to study it under a microscope /pos

“Scott about to have to pay all the shipping to Spain” that’s such a good point actually, though I think shipping to America is probably more lol

Sausage did amazing!!! We love his team hyping him up :)))

Dodgebolt

I love seeing everyone rooting for red :D

That is just… not true, Kara 😂😂😂

So true Callum, the void hole in the merch store was peak mcm energy

Sausage for mcc spanish team 2k23

TIL Sausage was Cuban, though tbf I’ve never watched him before and I thought he was from Spain for some reason

This team was so fun :)))

Capitan is a menace /pos

Sausage’s Oli impression 😂

The game ended and they all collectively lost their minds, as they should

CALLUM SMACKTALKING GRID RUNNERS?!??

Shane and Callum sending Tubbo their stream keys and asking Scott if he’d do the same and his response being “God no”

[vase-of-lilies]

✨🌈☀️send this to the ten people you’re happy to see every time they pop up on your dash/notif and wish them a good day🌟🌈💥

Omg, thank you!! <3 <3 You are so sweet!! I love your little comment on my post that says "🦊 Butters"

It made me laugh because it's like here is Fox her name Butter lmao Sorry that sounded funnier in my head haha

[beardedhandstoadshark]

Do you read reader insert fanfics?

I‘m sorry, but I just genuinely can’t take them seriously (/lh). Lots of respect to people who can, though, really!

/lh for this whole thing actually it’s really not supposed sound mean or anything like that; more like when you try to act in character but just can’t keep it up so you start giggling, it’s that vibe XD

Main thing‘s the [Y/N] part, I always read that as it stands, and even if I don’t my name doesn’t clash that well with English, so it always reads like profound description of the most elegant scene ever, but you knew it would never be, could never be whispered by their voice, not your name. You knew, yet you still prayed upon that futile wish you’d made upon the night sky on this very bridge twelve months before, begging it to stop teasing you with false hope time and time again, too caught up in your head to notice when your light finally turns to look at you, the moon reflected in their bright eyes above already revealing what impossible words would leave their lips only a moment later:

[MECHTHILDE]

…t‘was funnier in my head lol, that automatic switch to text-to-speech sounds in my head whenever [Y/N] comes up is surprisingly hard to write out. Hope it still makes some sense though

That’s the main thing but it’s also the "I‘d never actually do that lmao“

Also ykhow lots of videogames have silent protagonists so the player can insert themselves into it? But they still very obviously have a personality on their own so no one actually does that? Like, Link is still Link, even if you give him your own name at the start of the game. (Or Binkus. Or Asshat. Or whatever names people might write). Same with reader insert stories! I read it like thats a separate character who happens to share a name because I put it in the field.

…only that’s when the text to speech dial up noise comes back and my inner reading voice breaks character again lmao

(Also 95% of them are pure romance in some way and that’s not my main cup of tea. In fanfiction, ironic, ik.)

[ryuukenden4]

Girls don't want boys.

Girls want Major Hideomi Iba to have a more substantial role in Tenrou: Sirius the Jaeger season 2.

[sychan]

sorry not sorry

[pinkheichou]

Eren: Oh god, I think I'm dying

Armin: Can you hurry please? I want to play chess without being disturbed