#sorry if its bad or if you dont like it i wasnt feeling great

[sereniv]

apologies are hard and can be embarassing

but life is too short to let your grandma go to bed sad

[inbabylontheywept]

bad dating stories time: the shoe incident

so in highschool, my best friend wasnt allowed to go on dates unless there was another couple there to keep an eye on him. part of this was his parents being insane, but also, part of it was him being insane. in a problem with no reasonable parties, there are no reasonable solutions.

at some point in my junior year, my sorta-gf broke up with me, and i just wasnt feeling dating, which was bad for my friend, because he had a good thing going with a girl he met in court.

he kind of hounded me about it. kept pushing me to just put me feet back in the dating pool and i wasnt real thrilled about it, because i knew he was pushing me for his own benefit, not mine, so i kept telling him to fuck off, and after a few weeks of being told that i would date when i was damn well ready, he eventually said: okay. what if i paid for the date AND found you a blind date AND all you had to do was show up?

and i shouldve said no, i know, but i let him wear me down, and i will own my fault in that. a date starting on such a stupid premise could never have gone well.

but he still managed to find a way to make it worse.

i dont know how long he tried to set a blind date up. it couldve been multiple attempts. he couldve stooped to this immediately. but what happened in the end was that he called a girl from the ward he attended - a girl that he knew had a giant, mushy crush on him - and he said: hey! how would you feel about going on a date this weekend?

(you know, implying it was with him, but never actually saying it.)

and she said YES WOW I WOULD LOVE TO and he said great! and then he called me up and said he found me a date.

i did not learn about his crimes until several weeks later. i will die swearing before god almighty that i would never have allowed this travesty to happen if i had known.

that was on a monday. the date of the date rolled around that friday evening, and im sorry to confess, i really phoned the whole thing in. i showed up in my favorite comfy outfit, which was also a fashion crime: basketball shorts and flipflops and a baja hoodie. it was super comfy but it made me look kind of crazy. i picked him up first, and then i picked up his date next, and then we went to pick up my date, and thats where you're gonna get the play by play.

i arrived, walked across the yard, and knocked on the front door. she opened it almost immediately, like shed been waiting right by it, and i could see her expression go from OMG IM SO EXCITED to super disappointed, then disgusted and finally pissed. and because i didn't know about my friends sins, i thought it was from my outfit. which seemed... harsh. like, hey, im allowed to be quirky, fuck you. also its a blind date, i thought the deal was that we were both going to be sad broken sacks of mortality.

anyway, we looked at each other for several seconds before she slammed the door in my face.

i looked back at my friend. he was sweating bullets. i dont know what he expected from this, but there was this big long pause where we both tried to figure out what to do, and then the door opened up, and her dad invited me in, and he said she was gonna need a few minutes to finish getting ready, and that in the meantime we could sit and talk.

we did not talk. we did sit. i sat down on the couch, and he sat down in a chair across the couch, and then instead of talking he cleaned his pistol on the coffee table. i wasnt actually sure if it was a threat, or if it was just a fidget thing for 40+ year old republican men, but when i tried to help he got snappy so i just watched him put a pistol back together.

he was okay at it.

eventually my date came downstairs, still mad as hell for reasons beyond my ken, and i felt pretty guilty for being such a mess because i thought that was why she was so angry. i tried to make up for by walking her to the car and getting the door for her, just generally trying to be extra polite, but before i could make it back to the drivers side, her dad called me back to the door. so i flipped around, went to the door, and immediately regreted my decision.

soon as i was within range, her dad got waaaay too close to me, leaned in, and said "whatever you do to her, i will do to you," and my brain went into overdrive making three consecutive realizations.

realization one was, damn, the pistol thing was a threat. that sucks. what an asshole. realization two was, wait, im autistic and even i know theres a 0% chance me and my date even hold hands, least of all boink. does this guy actually think there's even a 1% chance of anyone in that car getting laid tonight? is he an idiot? and then realization three went through, which was wait, is this guy threatening to fuck me? and unfortunately, with my brain doing so much processing, my mouth was left to run amok, so somewhere between realization 2 and 3, i said:

"i can't get pregnant"

which, i swear, wasn't actually me trying to be a smartass, it was just me pointing out that he couldn't actually follow up on that threat. it just wasn't possible. we do not live in the omegaverse and im not scared of you.

still, it was an insanely catastrophic thing to say, and the moment we both heard it, we bluescreened. that single sentence obliterated both of our momentary streams of consciousness like a saltine in front of a sand blaster. problem was, he'd probably gone his whole life not even realizing someone could say something that stupid, and making that realization was going to cost him a lot of thinking time. me though? i had been saying shit like that for 17 years, i didnt have to rewrite my expectations of human nature, i just had to plan an exit and start striding. so i was already halfway back to the car before i heard "hey. hey come back. Hey. Hey. HEY. HEY WAIT. HEY GET BACK HERE. HEY-"

and then i was in my car, and i drove away.

if this happened today, he'd have called her, and the whole thing wouldve imploded then and there, but back then, there were still a decent number of teenagers without cell phones. especially the teenagers of insane, gun toting parents. so she just said: whoa what was that all about? and i said: dont worry about it, he'll tell you about it when you get home.

and she said: ok and went back to staring daggers at me and my friend.

WHICH SURPRISINGLY isnt even how the story ends.

we went to an improv comedy show, and it was a disaster. it shouldve been like, 7/10 tops, but between my date being mad, and my friend having a good time, and me having the existential terror of knowing that a guy with a pistol was probably waiting outside his house for me to come back, it was easily 11/10. i laughed way too hard at everything. especially the jokes that flopped. id sit there in this mostly silent room and laugh until i dry heaved a little, and my date was absolutely disgusted, and even my friend was a little embarrassed, which would just make me laugh harder. i laughed so hard that night i could barely talk the next day. and then the show ended, and my friend said, you know, that was a good time, but i think we should maybe do something a little chiller? who wants to walk around the park? and his date said yeah, and my date said no, and i finally had mercy on the poor woman so i said, look, im gonna drop you off. and i am so, so sorry about this, but im dropping you off like a block away. super duper sorry.

do talk to your dad about the pistols thing if you dont want this happening more in the future tho.

and she said: okay. so i dropped her off, and she walked a block down, and that was that.

then i drove my friend and his date to a park that was good for wandering. i figured they wanted something more private, so instead of following them around point blank, i chose a park with this 30 foot rope tower, and i climbed to the top and i said: hey i can see you anywhere from up here, you are officially chaperoned from a distance. get panopticoned idiot. except my friend really is an idiot, and he didnt really get the whole 'now i dont have to third wheel so insanely hard with you guys' thing so he climbed up the tower too, and then his date followed behind him, so there are three people basically sitting together on top of a telephone pole.

and then they started making out.

i was close enough to hear it.

i didnt really know what to do so i was just kind of sitting there, dissociating, when some college kids came around and started shaking the tower. my friend's date went aaaaaaaaaa im afraid of heights :( and my friend went oh, dont worry, ill hold you tight ;) and i went hey, im gonna climb down and ask them to stop.

so i did climb down, and i did ask them to stop, and they flipped me off, which i wasnt even mad about. at that point i was i was like yeah, it would be weirder if this wasnt a mess. gods plan has been to fly this day like a 747 into my metaphorical twin towers and brother he is close enough for me to see him grinning through the cockpit window. still, eventually the college students got bored, so they climbed up the tower, which gave my friend and his date a window to climb down, and together we walked back to my car.

now, i cant explain why this is, but sitting back in the drivers seat was my carriage-back-into-a-pumpkin moment. i'd been chill about all the chaos, just rolling with the punches, but sitting down made me realize how much of a shitshow the day had been, and while i couldnt go back and fix all of it, i could go back and fix one thing.

so i told my friend and his date, hey, you two, stay here and don't do anything weird. don't. then i walked back to the rope tower, and i started picking up the shoes the college students had left at the base in order to climb.

about halfway through this, i realized that if i took all their shoes, they might think i was in it for the money, and i actually wanted them to know i was in it specifically to spite them. fuck those guys. so i put all the right shoes back, gave myself a 100 foot headstart, yelled "nice shoes, assholes", did a little jig, and started running.

my advice to everyone is that college students are faster than you think. even with the headstart, and the whole climb down the tower thing, i was still only fivish seconds ahead of them by the time i got to my car. i flung the door open, looked in the backseat, didnt see anyone, flung the stolen shoes in the backseat, heard two "ow"s, took that as proof of presence, jumped in and pealed out of the lot.

my friend and his date popped up a few seconds later. they were, uh, doing something weird in the back seat. my one request - obliterated.

they climbed up to ask where the hell all the shoes had come from, and i was like yeah i stole them from the college students, and they were like oh. cool. hope you had fun. and i was like, i did. i did. but speaking of fun, what were you doing back there?

and for the first time in my buddies life, i think he was actually embarassed.

[strawberrymatchawhore]

baby

summary- babying your "tough" hubby rafe.. maybe some freakydeakyness at the end

note- this is the complete opposite of the rafe ive been writing about LMAOOO.. this man is SO BAD help me

it was 2am and you were in your bedroom scrolling on your phone, a random netflix show playing in the background. you've been waiting for your husband to get home for hours, being the wife to the chief of police did have its negatives. this was one of them.

you heard footsteps walking up the stairs and immediately turned off your phone, throwing the covers over yourself you pretend to be asleep. the door opens and you feel the weight of the bed shift.

"hey baby. sorry for getting home so late" rafe says giving your forehead a kiss, you jokingly ignore him.

"c'mon now i know youre awake.. get up and hold me." he begged tiredly, you couldnt help but giggle at how desperate he sounded.

"fine." you mumbled into the sheets but stayed in your position, he hugs you putting all of his weight on your body.

"okay okayy, i got it. now get off me you fatty." you whined, pushing his large frame off of you. you leaned against the bed frame and opened your arms, the both of you adjusting to a more comfortable position. which was the both of you propped up against a pillow.

"im so tired." he yawns into your chest, you played with his hair as the both of you stayed in silence.

"i know you are, you need a day off. youve been working too hard." validating him, his hand plays with the ribbon of your pajama shorts.

"see? youre still in your uniform, youre gonna make the bed dirty." you patted his back and drew circles on it.

"what, you want me take it off? if you wanted to see me naked you couldve asked sweetheart." he looked up at you and smirked. you glared at him, lightly slapping his arm.

"not what i meant.." you blushed.

"youre so cute you know that rafey, honestly when i look at you i just want to eat you." you confessed and massaged his temples, his face nuzzles into your chest even further. clearly he was blushing as well.

"i dont know how i got so lucky, im so glad i have a such a beautiful boy in my life. everything about you is just perfect." you cooed admiring his sculpted face, the way his plump lips curled into a smile.

"stopppp" he whined. you couldnt help but pull out your phone and take a picture. because if you didnt, who wouldve believe that your 6'2 husband loved to be babied like this? not like you were going to show anyone, its just for your eyes only. you wanted to cherish this moment forever.

"did you just take a picture?"

"let me see it." he shot up and reached for your phone. you put your phone under your pillow and laid on it, making sure he wasnt able to grab it. the two of you started play fighting.

"nooo please, you look so cute. let me keep it!!" you laughed, he started to tickle you. and you slowly started to fall off the bed. your legs wrapped around his waist and dragged him down, if you were gonna fall he was going to come down with you.

the laughing coming from you both died down and you looked up at him, what a funny position. you both were on the floor and he was in between your legs hovering over you.

rafe leaned downed and passionately kissed your lips, his hand starts to play with your shorts. you eventually pull away and slap his hand.

"nuh uh. go shower first. you stink." you got up to your feet then helped your boyfriend get up as well. you looked up at rafe with your head tilted, what was this man plotting?

"not unless you join me.. you cant say no" he quickly said and grabbed you by the waist. hoisting you over his shoulder and carrying you to the master bathroom.

"ahhh! rafe stop!!" you busted out laughing, kicking your feet as he practically dragged you to the shower. he put you down and turned on the warm water, it poured over you both. you furrowed your eyebrows.

"great now my clothes are all wet." you pouted crossing your arms over your now soaked tank top.

"more reason to take it off... lift your arms f'me"

[luna0713hunter]

requesting for zoro with shy! reader who he begins to avoid and not talk that much to out of worry about his feelings for them. reader thinks he hates them and talks about it with usopp. usopp then confronts zoro about it and he’s later convinced to confess to reader. tysm and keep up the great work 🤍

Author's note : feels like i haven't wrote for Zoro in a while!! Hope you enjoy it and thank u! ^^

i just finished this at 2 am and i have a lecture at 7 am lmaooo

Easy to love

Zoro Roronoa x reader

Warnings : none,angst to fluff,hurt/comfort,talk about insecurities,happy ending

*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘

The sound of the music and people talking all vanishes in the background as you watch Zoro stands up from his sit right next to you and leaves for more drinks.

And it was like that all night long.

Ever since you joined the straw hats,you couldn't help your heart from beating a little faster when you were in Zoro's presence. Since the very first begining,he was your main focus; wherever he went, whatever he needed. Zoro was you sun,your moon and everything you loved, simply was in him.

But loving Zoro wasnt easy.

You were never one for showing open affection;your shy nature never allowing you to talk about your real feelings,and making everything harder for you. And Zoro having an intimating personality didnt help either. So you stayed back; choosing to not talk to him when he was around. And Zoro seemed like it didnt matter to him as well,since he never took it upon himself to open an actual conversation with you. And to tell the truth,you knew he probably hated your guts.

So as always,you loved him in silence.

The glass of the drink in your hands sweats slightly;the cool feeling welcoming on your warm skin. You didnt really drink much,even if you were drowning in sorrow,you chose to stay alert in case of danger.

So when Usopp slides in the sit right next you,you immediately acknowledge his presence.

His drunk presence.

"yo," he giggles from his own voice and slides his ridiculous sunglasses down his nose to eye you and then your untouched drink, "what's gotten you in a bad mood?"

You give him a half hearted smile and tilt your head, "what do you mean?"

"well,for starters you haven't even touched your drink all night," he motions to the glass in your hand,then his voice takes a cautious tilt, "and you're crying and its not from alcohol."

Upon his declaration,your eyes widen and you hurriedly start wiping your eyes.

When did you even start to cry?

"ah,its nothing, Usopp. dont worry about it."

"c'mon, I'm your crewmate and friend. You can tell me anything." He bumps his shoulder to yours gently, "and you always keep everything inside. Its not good for ya."

You smile softly at him and look back down at your glass.

The ice had melted completely.

"since when did you become to smart?"

"I'm always smart!dont be maan to a man who's here to comfort you!"

"sorry,sorry!" You giggle,but it sounds sad even to your own ears. You sigh and your fingers trace the water beads on the glass, "it's Zoro."

"Zoro?what about him?"

"well...i kinda...like him?" You huff and shakes your head, "no...who am i kidding,i love him."

Usopp stays silent;maybe out of shock or for giving you the time you need to gather the rest of your thoughts.

"i love him so much. So so fucking much,but he fucking hates me. And..." Your voice cracks and you lower your head, "and it hurts. Cause i know I'll never have him."

Usopp rests a comforting hand on your shoulder, "y/n," his voice is oddly gentle for someone who had too much drinks, "i dont think he hates you. Zoro's just like that; he's emotionally constipated." His hand squeezes your shoulder reassuringly, "dont think much about it. I promise that he doesnt hate you."

A sigh escapes you lips and you bite them from wobbling, "y-yeah. Ok." You clear your throat and suddenly stand up, "listen,thanks for listening,but i think I'm gonna rest for a bit."

Usopp nods, and stands up as well, "need me to walk you back to the ship?"

"its alright. Thank you again."

And with that,you exit the bar as fast as your legs allow you to.

-

The weather outside is warm;gentle breeze coming from the ocean and messing up your hair. Your cheeks are sticky with tears,and your eyes hurt from rubbing them all night long.

Maybe you should just quit being a pirate;leaving the Straw hats and work in a small shop or somewhere. Wherever if it means you wont see the man you love,hate you so much. And the mere thought of never seeing your crewmate,of never seeing Zoro,has your tears running again.

"never thought alcohol would do this to you."

That has you jumping from your place and turning around to see Zoro leaning against the doorframe of the bar.

And when he spots your tears,he frowns and his lips twist downward unhappily. As he steps closer to where you're sitting,his three swords clank against each other,and the sound has you deciding whether you can run for it or he'll catch up to you.

However,before you can even stand up,he sits heavily beside you and you wrap your arms around yourself to make yourself smaller. Zoro side eyes you and wets his lips.

"Usopp talked to me."

You swallow loudly and shrink into yourself more.

"is..is that so?"

"yeah. And he actually said something interesting for once in his life."

"what did he say?" You laugh nervously.

"Oh, nothing much, except," he turns to you completely and rests his elbows on his knees, "that you think i hate you. Now,i can only hope he was bullshitting about that as well;like all of his wild stroies."

When you stay quiet and lower your head more,he lets out a bitter laugh and raises his brows.

"you cant be serious."

And for some reason,those words are enough to break you.

You jerk your head up in his direction,and watch as he flinches slightly upon seeing your tear stained cheeks.

"and why fucking not?!" And gosh,you aren't even drunk but your words start spilling out of your mouth without any filter, unlike your usual self, "you never talk to me!heck,you dont even look me in the eyes!!how the hell am i supposed to think otherwise when the man I'm always chasing,hates my guts!?"

And for the first time since meeting him,Zoro seems actually speechless. The silence starts to stretch for so long that your cheeks start to burn with embarrassment and new wave of tears make their way down your eyes. You furiously start wiping at them;the burning growing more as you stand up .

"just forget it," you mumble without looking at him, "forget everything i said. And I'll leave the crew as soon as possible so you dont have to worry about-"

You dont have time to continue,before a pair of strong arms wrap themselves around your middle,and with one simple tug,you drop in Zoro's lap. Your back hits his muscular chest and when you realize your situation,your cheets burn bright red.

"What the," you start to squirm, "Let go!"

But Zoro only tightens his hold on your waist. He drops his forehead against your shoulder with a huff and mumbles something in your neck. You stop your squirming,and with hesitant fingers brush against his hair.

And you dont think you can sleep that night after knowing how awfully soft they are.

"Zoro," you softly whisper, "i cant understand what you're saying."

There's another huff and you realize just how much of a man child he truly is.

"i said,i dont hate you." A pause, "its actually the opposite."

"is it?"

"yeah." You shiver when you feel his lips brush against the skin of your neck, "i happen to like you very much. And i suck at acting around the people i like. Always try to push them away instead."

And when he squeezes your middle,you let out an embarrassed squeak.

"y/n," he gently turns your face toward himself by taking hold of your chin gently, "i love you."

And when your tears start to fill you eyes again,you know its happy ones this time.

Zoro frowns and huffs;and with such gentle hands wipes away your tears.

"don't cry. It makes me want to tear the world down when i see your tears."

He pressed his lips to your forehead.

"i dont wanna live in a world where you cry."

And those words,has you throwing your arms around his neck,and pull him close to press your lips to his soft ones.

But before you do, you whisper against his lips,

"i love you too. I dont wanna live in a world where i cant love you."

And for once in a long time,the night feels lighter and the moon shines.

[songspirits]

rating fanon portrayals of the outsiders boys

note: my guesses on the canon personalities probably arent even true lol this is my opinion

-

ponyboy curtis

5/10

sometimes the portrayals are really good!! but i hate that often, people portray him either as a moody brat or a weak baby. he is canonically a good fighter, especially after the fire, though he doesn’t like to. hes a loner, hes a reader, hes a pacifist, hes a good kid.

you have to remember that the outsiders is literally written in HIS POINT OF VIEW!!! ofc yes he’s a sassy and snarky teenager but he is also so intelligent and smart. hes a loner, but the gang would never shun his company. he has so much depth that a lot of writers often forget. hes a 14 year old kid with thoughts of a adult and can only do so much. thats what makes the outsiders so relatable to alot of people. its his intelligence that makes him and darry argue, because of how darry sees himself in ponyboy

but also on the other side of the coin ponyboy is a fragile character after the events of the book, because he is 14!!! but he has thoughts!!

i feel like people forget his good traits and only focus on the bad (and oh my goodness does this count for darry too!)

sorry for my rambles i just love his character so much :-(

darry curtis

7/10

besides fanfiction.net and like 30% of the fics on ao3 hes actually a solid portrayal most of the time, but tons of people forget that his relationship with ponyboy wasnt actually that batshit awful. sure theyd butt heads alot and go back and forth but they love each other thats why they did that. hes so much more than just an angry man who happens to be ponyboys brother.

hes a man who peaked in high school (IM KIDDING) and lost it all not because of his brothers but because of his parents. there was probably some strong resentment there for a while until they died. darrys problem or flaw is that he cares too much and his fear turns to anger. its love for sodapop and ponyboy that brings him back when he realizes his anger is doing more bad than good for his little brothers. It’s opening up and allowing his brothers in that helps his character.

that being said, people often focus more on his bad traits than his good traits. its a running theme in the outsiders fandom, i’ve noticed

sodapop curtis

7.5/10

highest rating i have on this list!! fanfiction.net outsider fics ive gotta say i actually just cant handle it so thats why it isnt a full 8 and ao3 is a 50/50

people put that hes soft but also forget that hes wild. hes batshit CRAZY. hes just as protective as darry and just as snarky as ponyboy. hes soft!! hes rough!! sodapop curtis is a dynamic character!!!!

johnny

5/10

ehhhhhh, most johnny portrayals i’ve seen are either really good or really bad. kinda ponyboy’s problem, being seen as weak. hes just a dynamic character who is allowed to be weak but also has so many strong traits about him. he is a frightened wounded animal to most but to the gang hes something more than that. also, snarky and ‘over’ johnny portrayals are great.

dallas

4/10

most portrayals i’ve seen are pretty good but its the same problem ive seen in all the boys— they only focus on a few traits dallas has (aggressive, tough, hardened) and stick with that. forgetting the youth in dallas winston and making his character honestly… less tragic?

imo the tragedy of the outsiders is the youthfulness in all the boys and how shitty situations couldnt make them more vulnerable, so i would love more of a vulnerable dallas in fics around the gang. another thing, people forget how much ponyboy really does mean to dallas. johnny and ponyboy were both his brothers and he’d did so much for the both of them precisely bc of that

two-bit

5/10

again.💔people forget how DYNAMIC these characters are!!! two-bit knows when to get serious for the love of god!!

steve

1/10

what portrayal. ☹️ppl dont write him enough and if they do its like one line #justiceforsteve

in conclusion

the outsiders fandom often have such good portrayals but only for one part of their character. this isnt to shame anyone or anything!! but this is just a helpful criticism ?? for any writers out there portraying the boys!! trust me i had to think abt this too lmao

[rivvyhood]

bsf! chris sturniolo x reader

summary: you and chris are childhood friends, one night chris texts you and you find out that he is not in a great position. You go to see him immediately.

warnings: kissing, suggestive, fluff

2.14 am

Chris texted me, I was listening to my sleeping playlist and my headphones were in so I heard the chime. “are u sleeping?” I open my eyes hardly and reply to chris’ chat; “I was trying to” I FaceTime him. His eyes are all puffy and red. I wake quickly, “Chris, Are you okay?” He replies, “ I don’t know. I’m just so scared about the future and losing everyone and shit. And I just, I like I wanted to talk to you. I’m sorry it’s late or whatever-“ I let out a deep breath; “ Chris it’s okay, you can talk to me anytime you like. I’m glad that you called me. But I can’t leave you looking like this. Can I come over?” Chris’ eyes lit up with fireworks, “Yes I would really like that.”

2.43 am

I text him, “Open the dooooor”

He reads the message and opens the back door quietly.

“Heyy y/n, thank you so fucking much for coming im so happy that i have a friend like you.”

I smile at him and we go into the kitchen to just sit there and talk a bit.

We talk about his concerns and i listen to him, deeply and try to understand him.

I hug him. But my heart is racing, my palms are sweaty. Im feeling so nervous while i shouldn’t about my best FRIEND this way.

But it wouldn’t mind if he kissed me right now and got me up to his room and-

I should stop. I should go. This is bad. Our friendship is going to be ruined if i dont stop thinking like this about him.

4.11 am

We are now sitting on the couch in his room and watching some random tv show because we have to sleep but we cant.

I tell him that i should go, that it may be weird for his parents about me staying the night. He tells me that he wants me there, he tells me that im the only one he wants me there. I want to jump in his face and kiss him all over.

I cant.

I cant.

I shouldn’t.

I shouldn’t.

But…

I kiss him.

He reaches for my neck and stars kissing me harder. Our mouthes move in sync. Its perfect. Its like my life is complete and i didn’t even know that i needed this until like 2 hours ago.

We stare at each other.

“I have wanted this for ever y/n. I was justing losing hope now but, now i think its impossible for me to ever even consider losing hope.”

“Why didnt you make a move?” I reply.

“I did. I really did but i think it just wasnt enough?”

I hug him. I tell him that i dont ever wanna lose him so he has to make his mind about this. He kisses me, and tells me that im his dream.

We move to the bed and cuddle together for a bit. He tells me that Nick is going to be thrilled about this.

“He’s been shipping us for like 7 years now, y/n. I think he is gonna pass out when he finds out about this.”

authors note: this is my first fic, i hope you liked it 💞

[cupoftaae]

Growing Pains (KTH drabble)

Summary- You and Taehyung discover the struggles of parenthood as you take on the task of raising your 3 month old daughter, Kiyomi.

Warnings- mentions of postpartum struggles and attachment issues

word count- 1.6k

A/N- Hi guys! so after Ladybug got so much love I decided to make a another drabble to continue their storyline, this takes place months after their daughter is born. Hope you enjoy it!

Taehyung woke up to the sounds of crying. He sat up and looked over at his clock, it was 4:32am, and you werent in the bed.

Groaning, he pushed the covers back and began walking down the hall into his daughters room, finding you on the floor with her in your arms.

"Im sorry we woke you, go back to bed" you whisper, noticing the sudden appearance of your husband in the room. "are you guys alright?" he asked, ignoring your previous demand as he walked further in and sat next to you, eyes still sleepy from the abrupt awakening.

You sigh and gently rock the small baby in your arms as she wailed, becoming frustrated yourself. "she wont stop" you exhale, finally looking at taehyung. "maybe shes hungry?" he suggested, moving his hand to wipe away his baby's tears.

"She wont latch...so I dont think she is...I also changed her and put her in a lighter onesie incase she was too hot" you gesture to the new outfit on Kiyomi, of course taehyung smiled at the ladybug printed fabric.

"let me see her" he whispered, gently taking the frail 3 month old out of your arms. "Hi baby, you giving mommy a hard time again?" he kissed all over her face before pulling her against him, her tiny head resting on his shoulder as his hand rubbed her back.

"im so tired" your hands run over the front of your face, knowing you return to work tomorrow afternoon and not only would you be exhausted, you would be missing your baby.

Since Kiyomi was born, youve been home every single day making sure she was taken care of, of course Taehyung has been an excellent help as well, and you probably wouldnt have been able to do this without him, yet at the same time you couldnt express your fears of going back to work after maternity leave....you didnt want to let him down or make him feel like you didnt trust him. It wasnt ever about trust, it was about going hours and hours without being able to make sure your daughter was okay. What happens if she needs mommy? What happens if she starts to cry and he cant differentiate it from a hunger cry, dirty diaper cry, or a tired cry?

"go back to sleep, i'll take care of her" he yawned and stood up, one hand reaching down to help you to your feet.

"I cant sleep" you sigh, walking over to rearrange her crib and the blankets. "cant we just keep her in our room tonight? she can sleep in our bed" you finish.

Taehyung gently rocked her around as he paced the room, the small cries slowing down. "baby I thought we agreed its better for her to be in her own room, she is gonna be too dependant on us.....and why cant you sleep? you just said you were tired-"

"because I have a list of things I need to do Taehyung!" you turn around, "I have to pump because she didnt want to eat, and I need to make sure you have enough milk for tomorrow, plus extra just incase, and then I need to put my work clothes in the washer because I forgot, then dry them, and you know what?" you throw your hands up as you walked over and took your daughter "shes only 3 months old, theres no harm in having her in our bed, who cares! she wont even remember anyways" you scoff and walk out of the room.

You didnt mean to snap on him like that, in fact you felt bad as soon as you left her bedroom. Taehyung is a great dad and an even better husband, but you still found yourself unable to stay calm when the list of things piled on, you didnt know how everything was going to go tomorrow, and you were stressed.

"hey...Im sorry if I said anything to upset you" he whispered as he finally walked into your shared bedroom, his daughter now asleep on the comforter as you sat and tried to pump milk.

sighing, you turn to look at him. "I didnt mean to act like that...you didnt do anything wrong, im just on edge"

He slowly walked over and sat on the bed next to you, careful of the sleeping baby in front of him. "whats going on, sweetheart?"

You didnt respond right away, instead you shrugged and looked down at Kiyomi, feeling those stupid tears resurface to your eyes again. "talk to me angel..." he rubbed your back.

"I dont want to leave her" you spoke in a choked whisper, wiping your cheek quickly. "What do you mean?" he calmly responded.

"Work tomorrow, I dont want to go....I havent been away from her since she was born. Ive had 3 months but im not ready." you take a breath, gathering your thoughts. "I went to the supermarket yesterday to buy dinner by myself, and almost had a panic attack because I realized she wasnt with me"

"my love, its okay to feel like this you know?" he rubbed your back softly, his chest tightening upon hearing your struggles. "sounds like you might be experiencing some separation anxiety,"

"I wanna work from home" you protest, shaking your head. "I cant leave her, and Its not about you not being a good parent- because you are so good, probably better than me" you chuckle lightly, "I just need it for myself....I need to see her. I spent 9 months taking care of her, I knew where she was at all times, and now that shes actually here I get so worried something will happen"

"i know sweetheart, I know" his hand ran through your hair as you spoke, "If you really want to look for a job that allows you to work from home, i'll support you all the way, you know that....but I really think its important to go tomorrow at least, to tell them about whats going on"

You leaned against your husband, glad he was supporting you in such a vulnerable moment. "why cant I just call them tomorrow?" you sniffle

"because I think its good to just go in, the smaller steps you take, even if its just a day, will probably make things easier for you."

"mm....just tomorrow?" you look at him

"Just tomorrow, then you dont ever have to see that place if you dont want to, you can stay home and i'll pamper you both"

You giggled and shook your head, "no, I wanna work....just not outside the house"

"and I support that" he gently lifted your chin so he could kiss you.

You smiled and kissed him back, watching him carefully as you pulled away.

"You are so beautiful, I swear motherhood made you even more attractive than you already were" he grinned

you raised an eyebrow, looking down at yourself before looking at him, "are you kidding me? I have a suction cup attached to my tit right now, and my hair needs to be washed....dont even try to say I look good" you shook your head as you noticed the bottle was full, taking off the pump and pulling your shirt down as you crewed the cap on.

"Ah you dont see yourself how I see you, the fact you go through so much for our baby is what is beautiful to me, and just for the record, you could never shower again and i'd buy all the nose plugs in the world just so I could be near you and call you cute"

"shut uppppp" you whine and lean against the pillow, "thanks though....fatherhood looks good on you"

"now thank you, but we both can tell that its not physically" he laughed and stood, putting his hands on his belly. "sympathy weight" he patted his stomach, making you laugh.

"Hey, I didnt do that to you!" you retort

"Yes! you insisted that I eat with you every time you had a craving, and what did I do?"

"ate with me" you smile

"yeah, except you were eating and it went to the baby" he chuckled, "mine went to my stomach area"

"hey I think dad bods are sexy" you nudge him

he rolled his eyes jokingly and wrapped you in his embrace, both of you looking down at your finally sleeping daughter.

"next kid, you deal with those cravings alone" he teased, hand gently squeezing you closer.

You smiled brightly at his words, you couldnt handle another child right now, especially with your current mental state, but you knew in the next 3 years you would enjoy having a second baby.

"thats not gonna be for a while bubs, relax" you patted his thigh

"what if she gets lonely" he looks at you

"are you serious" you laugh, squishing his face "shes 3 months, plus she has us, and tannie. I promise she will be well entertained until we have another kid"

He huffed and slouched down, making you giggle.

He sat up and grabbed his phone, turning the video on as he began filming his sleeping baby. "I havent recorded anything in a bit, well thats a lie, I recorded her yesterday when I was playing airplane and she ended up puking on me"

Your giggles are heard off camera before he faces it towards you "Oh its funny huh?"

"shh, youre gonna wake her" you quickly cover the camera to hide yourself before he continues to ramble on about your baby. He's been doing this since that day you both found out you were expecting Kiyomi, and it still warms your heart to see a man so in love with his creation of life.

He was your rock, and she was your ladybug, and perhaps you would be okay after all.

[httpiastri]

also omg spill the tea on meeting the drivers in spa!!! (only if you want to ofc, ignore this if you don’t 🙏)

aaaaaa okay its time!!!!!! dont grill me if my opinions don't match someone else's, i tried to be as kind as i can 🙏 gonna divide this into categories bcs i met some ppl who are not currently on the f2/f3 grids aaaaa but yeah here we go 🤭

(i saw and was close to pretty much all drivers, but im only including the ones that stood out to me in certain ways here 😊 in order of their racing numbers !!)

f3 !!!

dino beganovic - okayyy soooo. this and paul's will go kinda in the same direction… like i was not surprised to see him act not like super happily lol. i understand! when around fans or just people he doesn't know too well, he was not very excited. but when he was talking to jamie (ollie's... idk what he is? manager ish?), he was that cute happy self he can be! but most of the time, it was the dino we get to see in most prema videos from this year (like the "how well do you know your teammates" one) where he's just…. idk :/ dont blame him tho, im sure he's a great guy once you get to know him!!

gabriele mini - honestly i feel like i barely saw him, except when he and his gf were leaving 😭 welp. but he seemed happy to carry around his trophy!!

arvid lindblad - saw him already on thursday and was shocked both because i couldn't believe my eyes (it's him!! he actually exists!!!!!) and bcs he was much shorter than i had anticipated 😭 sorry arvid

sami meguetounif - i didn't see him around a lot but i saw him on the friday helping his team pack up the tent (carrying big things and such), while all other drivers seemed to not really care (from what i could see)(not just trident, but all teams). respect !!!!!!

tim tramnitz - i knew he was tall but he looked even taller irl!!!! i was so shocked, i felt so tiny

ollie goethe - seemed really happy and lowkey surprised when fans wanted to take pics with him 🥺 had a terrible haircut tho lmao i felt so bad for him... but he seemed so sweet all weekend!!! rlly wish i had talked to him aaaaaa

sebastian montoya - saw him around a lot talking to all kinds of drivers, seems very social butterfly-y :) he seemed very happy after the feature, and he seemed to definitely bring up pepe's mood too because they were talking and joking around for a long time 🥺 his sister (paulina) is also even more gorgeous irl omfg i didn't even think that would be possible…. like we always talk about how amazing she looks in pics but she was so so gorgeous irl (sadly didn't get to see her interact with nikita but 💔 i'll live ig)

luke browning - saw him tons and !! why is he so handsome ?!?!?!! genuinely fell in love all over again. what even. like i keep constantly thinking back to the eye contact we shared and im just. 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 seemed sweet with fans too, not super energetic but agreed to pics and such. wish i had shown him my browning bracelet or asked him to sign my sm shirt but i was too shy 💔

christian mansell - saw him get really happy when fans recognized and talked to him, i wanted to show him my mewsell bracelet but didn't have the courage 💔 but sweet and happy as usual!! no surprises there

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f2 !!!

victor martins - actually dont think i saw him all weekend 😭 idk how i managed that

zak o'sullivan - i saw him a few times, he seemed like a bit down ?? very understandable considering how he had glandular fever ?!?!?!?!!! poor boy :( but god did he look good despite it lmao

ollie bearman - very tall and definitely very popular, always ppl waiting to take pics with him lol! didnt speak to him and wasnt very close to him either but he seemed smiley and happy :) tbh i think i saw jamie more than i saw ollie himself ?? lmao

kimi antonelli - tiny!! and the hair is so so curly!!!! he was actually cuter irl, dont understand how he can do that but yeah. also very popular, and was very happy and kind when fans wanted pics hehe

zane maloney - think this guy had like a magnet attached to me or something because i saw him everywhere all the time 😭 like even when there were no other f2 drivers left, he was there… seemed sweet, his freckles are really cute irl too :)

jak crawford - so so tall!!! and the hair looked even better irl oh my god

juan manuel correa - was a second away from asking him for an autograph but he started talking on the phone at that exact moment 😶 seemed so sweet tho!

gabriel bortoleto - aka bortolotti as the commentators said 😐 saw him chatting with a bunch of different drivers, very much a social butterfly like sebas (or is it just because he's very liked in the paddock? likely both). wanted to go up to him when he was talking to luke (they stood outside their hospitality for a long time just talking) and ask for autographs on my sm tshirt (and to tell them that i loved their appearances on the pod) but was too nervous shdjdhdj

enzo fittipaldi - he had the cutest interaction ever with his gf, i nearly melted at the sight of them 🥺 and big bro was there supporting him all weekend too which was cute lol

paul aron - the driver i think most ppl are gonna read and ignore all other drivers lol. i only saw him on the friday and… well….. i wasnt surprised because i had not expected him to be the most open and excited etc. 🤷‍♀️ like he did agree to take pics and such! he put on a little smile for the fans! but there was nothing extra, which i understand. i think we all know the kind of expression he puts on and how "neutral" he looks at most times? like, when he's not around a close friend etc then he seems a little cold. to me, i feel like it just makes his smiles much more valuable in some way!! he wasnt very smiley even with karl or ralf, ig maybe he was focused on qualifying, but he didnt give anything extra and i dont blame him for that. still owns my heart !!!! <33 and i think that the difference from dino is that he seemed more focused and more ig neutral than cold like dino. paul didnt seem neither happy nor mad etc, just blank. 😌 (but god did he look SO GOOD, his hair was so light and my heart wanted to jump out of my chest istg. he looked so so good that i was too shy to even look too much at him 😭)

is*ck h*djar - pls i dont wanna say what i actually think but. his mom was so sweet 😭 my dad (who, for context, does hobby photography) held his camera aimed to the campos truck door in case pepe would come out, but she came out instead and like apologized and stuff for being in the way? so cute :((

pepe marti - 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 how do i even begin to describe him? when there aren't enough words in the entire world? the most gentle and sweet person ever actually, he seemed so tired and just done with the weekend when i talked to him but he still made time for me and tried to stay optimistic. sweetest boy ever <33333333 (i actually still cant really believe i met him and talked to him. like my brain still short-circuits a bit when i think about it. he was just truly an angel and i miss him so much <//3 i also cried a ton after that lol but he didn't see it so that's okay)(also his hands look even bigger irl 😁 sorry gtg)

‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎

former drivers/others !!!

fred vesti - like 10 minutes after the gp had finished, i just happened to accidentally run into him? like he was just heading out of the gate i was going into and so i stopped and gasped and just!!!!! and no one around me even looked at him (we were walking around general admission yk, just a big crowd all heading out on the track) which made me really sad but it was so cool to see him irl!!! he was taller than i had expected awww and so pretty

ralf aron - the only sentence that's still swirling around in my head: "is it possible to fall in love at first sight if you're already a fan?"....... because i think i fell in love 🫠🫠 when i tell you he was gorgeous, i mean it on a NEW LEVEL. like im obsessed. i was obsessed before but now im obsessed^2. actually insane. and he has the exact same voice as paul omg i would not be able to tell them apart irl. i love him so much, please help

adrian campos (jr) - sorry for including two team principals but 😭 idk where i get my shyness and social anxiety from because my dad has some kind of talent with people. he talks to everyone and everyone like him ??? anyways so he just randomly went up to the campos team principal and asked about pepe and they had a short but very friendly discussion 😭 and then he even came up to my dad later for new pepe updates lmao so he was a really sweet guy!!!

rene rosin - i didnt speak to him, saw him around a lot tho, but pt 2 of "my dad collecting team principals"…. my dad went to the f3 paddock and came back to tell me that he talked to "some prema dude" about dino's car… the convo went my dad: "is dino's car perfect now?". prema dude: "perfect for what?!". dad: "perfect for winning, of course!". prema dude: "yes, of course!!" and they had laughed and joked around and what not. i thought it was a funny interaction but didnt think more about that. until a while later, my dad pointed at rene and went "there's my friend from before!!" and i just ?!? you asked RENE if dino's car was good????? so yeah thumbs up to rene for being a funny dude 😁

sacha fouquet - sorry for including this but he also looked very good irl 😶 alsoooo like when i was hurrying to the f3 feature (i was running very late and wanted to be there for the start), i had to go under this tunnel to get from the paddock to the grandstands?? like a pretty narrow tunnel, only like 2-3 ppl width... and guess tho were heading to the paddock right when i was rushing away? all of the prema performance/race engineers! lovely timing! because they're all so so cool and made me so so so nervous 😭 (and the way i was just having to pretend like i haven't seen them all in 100 vids and even made gifs of them lmao what)

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gold star to anyone who made it this far ⭐️ sorry for the random yapping lol and for saying everyone looked better irl but it is true!!!! this isnt proofread so i apologize for any mistakes etc, pls feel free to ask if anyone has any questions... <3<3

[kyokikia]

Im curious, do people even write for uta? Do people like uta at all?? If you cant tell, she's my favorite female character! I dont see anyone talking about her 😭😭

i might write for her if someone requests it (when requests are back open) but she might be the only one piece female i would ever write for so, sorry for that

Has anyone else on here watched film red? I wanna talk about it with someone because its one of my favorite movies, currently listening to new genesis as i speak (ado's singing was HEAVENLY in the movie)

Ado's singing is so heavenly, and she honestly captured the supposed greatness of uta's voice PERFECTLY. I watched the movie in sub so i couldnt hear amalee dubbing uts, but honestly, i listened to amalee's covers of the songs, and i think the dub watchers were robbed from hearing amalee's covers. She covered all the songs PERFECTLY! She did the spell part of tot musica perfectly aswell and i adore Amalee's and Ado's works so much!

SPOILERS UNDER KEEP READING FOR ONE PIECE: FILM RED

I think she's a little crazy but i love her a lot, what she did in the movie is honestly justifiable. I love her design so much, i wanna cosplay her but i got my bills to pay 😭 i'll do it once i get extra money tho, anyway, i feel so bad for her because for years she thought that shanks had abandoned her but turns out she was manipulated into singing tot musica by the people of Elegia 😭 i feel so bad knowing on how much she probably blamed herself for what happened but it wasnt her fault at all

Shanks is so selfless i swear, the way he just chose to take the blame instead so uta wouldn't blame herself and so she could make other people happy with her voice aswell 😭♥️

Watching uta descend into madness, as her mental health and physical state reach its absolute lowest was so heartbreaking (but the movie was so cool to watch!)

As you probably know, the wakeshrooms cause the person who eats them to stay awake until they die, and makes them more aggravated and brings out their negative emotions more, so i can see why she became more deranged as the movie went on. i feel so bad for her she deserves better 😭 i see why she was driven into madness after meeting shanks after all those years

Being kept on that island for so many years mustve been so depressing, so she was in a bad mental state most of her life. Kept alone, isolated with the entire world other than Gordon, not knowing anything going on in the world is so sad

I can see why she hates pirates so much, seeing as she cares so much about her fans (that she would trap them in the sing sing world just so they wouldnt have to deal with pirates anymore and for a 'new era' which she had good intentions with, but honestly it wasnt that great of an idea) she had the idea that all pirates were bad, and seeing all her fans sending her video mail about it probably amplified her hatred.

I took notice on how by the time uta had to sing tot musica, she was in her absolute worst mental and physical state, some of the words were linked together some words were messed up, i think ado captured on how much of a terrible state uta was in by the time she was forced to sing the song perfectly, i adore ado's singing in film red so much

I might've misunderstood uta honestly, i might've done her wrong in this post, i also realize this entire post is a rant but oh well i honestly just wanted to talk about her, anyone wanna tell me their thoughts on film red?

[malwaredykes]

ok. finished honest hearts. most of my inventory is plants and mushroom and Soups And Potions And Elixirs made from said plants and mushrooms. which is excellent.

the salt-upon-wounds confrontation was Tchruly garbo like. first of all they lit up ole josh before anyone even had the chance to say anything LOL that wasnt like Bad necessarily just rly funny. like yeah we can negotiate before anything breaks out *the camera pans to Jotchua Grams lifeless body on the pavement* but um second of all what the hell was that dialogue. "grrrr im gonna kill you" "[speech 75] no thats stupid. dont" "umm okei :) but i'll be back >:(" *runs away* Like. man. listen. throughout the entire dlc i Did Not want to be fighting all those white legs lol. i didnt know those people. you know i generally hate the Hostile By Default Irredeemable Canon Fodder Raiders crap and in this case its just especially egregious to me, with them being a Tribe and with me being some random ass normie strolling into the area getting instructed by the local white saviors. like, okay, since i Was getting involved, then if anyone deserved to Feel The Judgment Of Mine fall upon them it was in fact salt-upon-wounds with his track record of being a horrible fucking person. so i had to fight my way through all those white legs only for the Problem Guy to be like "Hm Okay. Deal. You Leave Forever And I Get To Live. Sounds Good. Sucker" like. fuck no. youre dead. this is for waking clouds husband how DARE you make my bald queen SAD

which btw i did encourage cloud to get mad at daniel for hiding that from her. like yeah girl dont take this shit from him. youre allowed to feel angry. who does he think he is. making decisions for the sorrows like youre all children. be mad at him. chase him out. tell him to never show his stinky mug around these parts. If You Want. ahh but then the ending slides said she forgave him.... well i suppose i have to respect her choice... but... cloud honey if you ever wanna team up and chase daniels stinky mug far away just give me a call

i also encouraged follows-chalk to go out there and experience the world outside... i really hated how he felt obligated to ask joshua permission, and how joshua was like Well 🥺 I wont tell him what to do but 🥺 Is it wise... I just worry about my foolish little lamb 🥺... like. Shut Uuuupppp.... chalk is an adult. i think. either way what do You know. jotchua. last time you ventured into The Civilized Lands (lol) you were a fucked up genocide army general so forgive me for thinking you might not have the most objective and up to date outlook here. Anyway. chalk come hang out sometime. come to the lucky 38. youll meet my epic swag friends and family. LOL bit of an aside but (mostly so i dont become insane because of the dlcs writing) i like to imagine that most of the time chalk expresses incredulity about some Civilized World Concept like gambling (-_-) or big dams or big weapons, hes literally fucking with you. like hes joking around. he used to mess with daniel and jotchua like that and now hes doing it with you. like Wow... How Strange... You Say It Is Called A... "Window".... 😂😂😂...

loving how the ending slides barely mentioned joshua also. like wtf happened to him. who knows. damn maybe he did die and i didnt even notice. im sorry jotchua. may your soul quickly find its way to NOWHERE lol #owned

final verdict: waking-cloud and follows-chalk are great, joshua graham is an extremely funny character, daniel is nothing to me, the area is cool, the plot is dumb as hell, the whole thing is racist, the quests are boring. 3/10

[plantwriting]

Okay finished relistening to episode 1 (will listen to episode 2 and maybe more tomorrow but its like 10 pm and i have school tomorrow) of bitb and heres just like small collection of things that stuck to my mind!

Rolan does in fact canonically have a car i forgot about that so sorry rolan in my fic you got to live but lost your ability to drive such is life

Kian’s first act being just drinking something…. Like he wakes up and immediately gets alcohol… grizzly honestly just does such an incredibly amazing job making kian seem so like depressing but hiding it so well behind making everything seem like just some funny rockstar stuff its amazing

Also! The super tired ‘hey’ before he remembers and switches to ‘i mean whats up dude’??? Like could that have been a genuine mistake by grizz, sure, but i highly fucking doubt that. Like grizzly is so incredible at voice acting i refuse to believe that wasnt intentional

Rand. Just. How fucking mad he is at rolan. Its just painful. And how clearly done with it rolan is like you know this is an argument theyve had like hundreds of times before

So so so many details about kian that are so fucking fun to think about, specifically when he describes the look officer dudes gave him? Like (cant remember the exact quote but you get it) ‘ive seen some bad people in hollywood, people who just smile at you a certain way and you know you wouldnt want to meet them at night because they want to kill you’???? I am using that against him so hard holy shit

They just. Know nothing about how time works. They keep saying that its been a decade (it hasnt its been 15 years) and barc is supposedly old enough to have met them but no he is absolutely not and also charlie described barc as a golden retriever but then who the fuck is the black dog in rands official art just. Wow theyre so inconsistent about everything.

Theres definitely a few details about kian that i had forgotten about (like him just saying he has plenty more cars at home and whatever) but the pros of that is. I dont even need to decide to just ignore canon because i can just fucking believe that hes lying! Like its kian we cant trust his word on anything and thats great for me because i dont need to worry about messing up the canon!

Trying to just keep track of their stats and such but its. Its so hard. Because most of the time they just say ‘thats a success/hard success/failure/etc’ and not even what they actually rolled and then when they say what they rolled they still usually dont say what the number they had to beat was so just like.

Kian has 30 strength and 75 in guitar and 11 hp and that is all i can actually remember

Rand has 45 strength and 30 sanity (for like the first half hour) and ive already forgotten everything else

And rolan. Im going to be real i remember nothing already. I think he has 8 speed? But that was in the solo ep so i cant be sure. Also either him or rand had 14 hp i have already forgotten which one

Rat’s death is so hard to think about but its also very hard for me because im just thinking of kian going through the same fucking thing. Like hes aware of it and hes in pain and he just hears a buzzing and. Augh. (And kian probably died alone. God knows becky wasnt comforting him through that)

…..kian going fucking four times over the speed limit getting to galloway but then specifically not speeding with the others until theyre trying to leave after seeing rats whole thing? You cannot convince me that thats not like him being passively suicidal and just not caring about his own safety unless other peoples lives depend on it as well

Also, quick pat on the back for myself, i feel like i did very well with especially rand and rolan’s dynamic. Like just the intense care and love they have for each other but its been overshadowed by years spent apart and basically the second theyre left alone they immediately get into an argument and instantly start going right for all the things that hurt the most? Jesus they need therapy

Also kian (yes of course im focusing on him again thats my guy) just cares for them so much?? Like him immediately going after rolan and trying to help him without even knowing whats going on, also as fucking stupid as it is grizzlys plan being literally ‘im going to flirt with donna so john walks in on us and chases me with a shotgun to give a distraction for rand’ its like. So ridiculous. Yet somehow also very caring that this idiot is really willing to risk getting shot at to help rand out a bit

[owlnsfwsstuff]

Henry x innocent fem reader x Patrick

Y/n pov

I woke up and got ready for school i brush my hair and got into my favorit cloths heading off as i walk down the road i hear a car and a horn "BEEP BEEP!" I jump a bit and look behind to see a blue trans am car oh its the bowers gang! While everyone in school where scard of them i wasnt i never really knew why all the girls would call them perverts or creeps they seemed normal to me as the car slowed down patrick poked his head out the window "hey princess wanna ride~♡" i smile "sure!" I get in the back sitting btween patrick and henry " how are you guys doing what you been up to for the weekend" i smile softly victor said he was helping his mum belch was working on his car then henry spoke up " i was up all night thinking bout you my arm hurts~" he smirked at me "hm? Why?" I tilt my head a bit patick laughed i didnt understand what was so funny but soon the car drove straight past school "uh belch i dont wanna critique your direction skills but um we passed the school" he laughed " yeah i know where going to the quarry insted" i wasnt one to skip school but i trusted the four boys and nodded for the drive Henry's arm was around my sholder and Patrick's was squeezing my thigh and rubbing my soft skin " your thighs are so soft princess ~♡" he wisperd in my ear "hm? Oh haha thanks im trying a new shower gel it smells like strawberries!" I smile he rolld his eyes smirking i felt a wet toung on my neck from behind " dosnt tast like strawberries though~♡" henry wispers into my neck i blush a bit " uh n no just smells" he chuckled we soon got to the quarry we all pile out of belches car and went down to the water all the boys start to undress "uh!?" I cover my eyes and look away some of them laughed " oi we dont bite y/n its fine we wont do anything promise" vic said softly i did trust them all non of them would hurt me or do anything perverted....ecxept maby patrick and henry but theyd stop if i said i didnt like it they where pretty good friends when there not your bullies i smile softly " o...ok but dont make fun of me...i im self conscious " henry gave a hurt ecxpression "cmon princess we would never your one of the boys!....well kinda" he laughed i nodded we all got undressed i where some white underwhere with a little lace at the top and a pail blue bra they all stared a bit "dam...your so fineee~♡" patrick hollard i blush we all playd in the water for the rest of the day till sun down vic had to go home and help his mum belch was off to get more fire wood i sat around the fire getting warm patrick and henry had been giving eachother looks like they where talking telepathically i stare at the dancing flames till i feel two sets of arms wrap around my i jump a bit " uh!?...oh patrick ..henry its just you haha you scared me....whats wrong?" They cuddle into me still just in there underwhere i blush softly henry spoke up first"...we love you princess" he said softly in my ear patrick then teased " way to be suddle henry~" henry huffed " im sick of hiden it from her...she should know ...well?...witch one do you want princess me or him" i blush uh chossing btween both of then was hard i loved them both in there own special way i was quiet for a while till patrick spoke up "how about......we share~♡ i dont mind~" i blush and so did henry a bit " i mean...if she wants that i dont mind...as long as shes with us i dont care" henry mumbles i blush and nodded softly " s sure i i like both of you" i stutter henry kissed my cheek and patrick kissed my neck and mumnled "hmmm then its just us three forever....sounds great~"

Sorry for bad spelling and punctuation 😭

[urbestestwindgod]

epic the musical sagas 1-7 song rating tw i have bad taste

1. keep your friends close—this shouldnt be a shocker this was the song that after knowing abt epic but noy having tiktok at the time to be able to see its progress n stuff i didnt know much abt it n listening to the songs out of order was confusing but the moment i hesrd this enchanting melody i was a fan fan downloading tiktok just for the updates from jorge this has been my unbeatable favorite for a while im rlly annoying abt it as we know

2. open arms—the first released song i heard that introduced me to epic and again not knowing much abt it or how to listen to it in order in the early days (fun fact my intelligence peaked in algebra and ive never been that smart abt anything else ever) seeing ppl talk abt polities not knowing he died was kinda scary like wdym this cutie goes to “the wrong club”?? :(

3. suffering—its fun n ody gets to talk to his wife what do u want from me

4. scylla—AHHHHHHHHHH i fold over and seize every time those strings start after the “hello”

5. ruthlessness—like the idea of poseidon man handling him what can i say WHAT DO YOU W A N T from meee

6. wouldnt you like—i would i would

7. remember them—hes so dumb i lovw him

8. lucky runs out—if iii wasnt overstimulated rn i could gather my thoughts and explain this but unfortunately i am a student

9. storm—this and luck runs out are twins in my head and heart

10. polyphemus—THATS MY CYCLOPS!!! HELL YEA!!!

11. legendary—very good, love how telemachus sings like an adolescent love his dreams and love him unfortunately it IS in the same saga as….her

12. little wolf—I THOUGHT WE WOULD ALL AHIP HIM AND ANTINOUS AFTER THIS AONG BC THERES TENSION GUYS I SWEAR WDYM ITS CONTROVERSIAL :(

13. no longer you—if i could dance i would dance to this, with air probably but still

14. full speed ahead—need this song spoonfed to me while i bang on the table like a toddler in a highchair

15. the horse and the infant—NEOPTOLEMUS MENTIONED??? AHHH!!!!

16. different beast—lovely lovely lovely his voice is so

17. survive—oooo uhhhh

18. mutiny—it shocks me every time somehow

19. monster—should be higher but i forgor abt it srry—yeayea great song kick my feet to it wvery tim

20. warrior of the mind—greek son and thought daughter (was funnier in my head)

21. my goodbye—she leaved :(

22. puppeteer—if circe (odyssey) didnt plague my view of circe (epic) i would like her songs more sorry guys

23. done for—is it baaaaadddd that i dont have many thoughts on this :(

24.there are other ways—IM SURE THERE ARE CIRCE IM SURE THERE ARE

25. thunder bringer—again this was meant to be higher but i was gonna put it somewhere special and forgor :(

26. the underworld—oh ouch ouch ouch ouchie ouch

27. god games—THE SNIPPET OF THIS WAS THE FIRST EPIC SONG I EVER HEARD AND KICKSTARTED A GREEK MYTHOLOGY PHASE THAT MY FAMILY WILL NEVER FORGIVE JORGE FOR. apollos part was so short tho 😔 sigh…

28. just a man—I LIKE IT I JUST NEVER REMEMBER IT AGHHHHH I LOVE IT THO I SWEAR I SWEAR I SWEAR

29. we’ll be fine—OMFGOMFGOMFG unfortunately it is right before….yeaaaa

30. love in paradise—OH EWEWEWEWEWEW i would like this a lot more if people didnt act like calypso deserved to feel happiness or joy or pleasure or even life? idn where this unbridled hatred for her comes from i dont feel this way about way worse characters BUT I WANT EVERY DEATH IN THE ILIAD DONE TO CALYPSO FIVE TIMES EACH CALYPSO WHEN I CATCH UR ASS—its not even about odysseus anymore ody get in the car mama has business to attend to WHEN IM NOT SORRY FOR LOVING U COMES OUT I WILL SHAKE MY HEAD IN DISAPPOINTMENT AND and gently and discreetly remove it from my epic playlist :3 i block everyone i see who talks positively about her genuinely she ruins my day. i know shes not real but still the concept of her makes me physically shake in anger sometimes in the middle of my perfectly normal day SHE SUCKS I HATE HER I HATE HER I HATE HER SO FUCKING MUCH dont ask me why i dont know why but just just put me in a room with her and every weapon ever ever made that would be wish fulfillment for me

saga rating is ocean, thunder, cyclops, troy, underworld, circe, wisdom (and depending on how im not sorry for loving u goes justr know vengeance is going in eighth)

anyways uhm im a little manic this week but i hope i didnt make u hate me TOO much with this i am aware that my taste in everything is bad my favorite food is plain butterless angel hair noodles ans my favorite drink is water, my favorite color is green, my favorite animal is probably frogs bc most animals give me the heebie jeebies, and my favorite book is frankenstein thanks for being here i love u :3

[animestsstuff2]

•Sickly sweet•

Bakugou katsuki x vampire reader

Content warning: nothing lol! Not much going on

Part 2

♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎

You gripped your bag strap tightly, peering up at the school before you, U.A. Where people become heros. You were a bit late but when you live with someone who practically sleeps at least 23hours out of the day its something to be expected.

You walked in, seeing what looked like seniors littered the hallways. You passed the entrance exam, not that you actually needed to but you did anyways, placing 3rd. You sighed. Aizawa told you that you were in his homeroom, class 1-A. You walked up some stairs, eventually finding the large door and pushed it open. There were lots of kids. They looked over curiously, probably wondering who was coming in so late and if it was their teacher. You looked over them all and your cheeks heated up as they stared before they went back to their chatter, some giving me warm smiles.

You looked around for a seat and spotted one in between a boy with cream blonde hair and a guy with red hair. You walked over to the seat inbetween them.

"I-Is this seat taken?" You asked quietly, he turned to me and your eyes widened as his crimson ones met your own and he grunted.

His eyes are like yours, exactly like yours.

He turned back and face forward and you stood there awkwardly until a ruff, almost scratchy voice came from behind you. You turned and looked at the red headed boy. His sharp teeth grinning at you.

"No its free! Sit down" he smiled and you thanked him before sitting down.

You took your bag off, placing it on the ground and facing forward, wondering where your teacher was. It was your dad after all. He’s notoriously late but he was also working late last night. You turned feeling a tap on your shoulder to see the red haired boy looking at you.

"Hey. Im Ejiro kirishima, whats your name?" He asked and you smiled. He was seemed nice.

"Yuri" you answered. He nodded, saying your name once over.

"So whats your quirk, where you in the entrance exam?. I dont think i seen you" he asked.

"Huh? Oh yeah i placed third. My quirk is pretty average” You mumbled, it wasnt really a hero quirk.

"Oh hey! It cant be as bad as mine. I mean i can only harden my body" he grinned and You watched as he hardened his arm, You watched amazed. He would make such a great hero.

"No way! Is it actually fully hardened?" You asked, completely amazed. You reached your hand out not asking Kirishima if you could touch him but he didn’t protest, though his cheeks did flush slightly as you repeatedly ran your hand up and down the now jagged surface of his arm. You both however failed to notice a small purple grape boy who stood beside yous, watching.

"Hey hottie, hows about you feel me up" the nasally voice piped up behind you and you pulled away from kirishima who finally let out a breath and turned to the small purple boy behind you.

"Excuse me?" You asked, taken aback by how forward he was.

"I said hows about you fee-" you cut him off.

"No no. I heard you but why would you say that. I dont want to feel you up. Thats such a random thing to say to someone, what a pervert" you grumbled, glaring at him. Your crimson eyes peering into his own as he became flustered and annoyed.

"I-I'm not a pervert! Youre the pervent feeling that guy up!" He yelled and some classmembers looked over at the commotion.

"I am not. Kirishima was showing me his quirky which is pretty cool by the way. Youre the pervert asking random girls to feel you up!" You snapped, glaring at him. His eyes widened, feeling intimidated by your blood ones.

"O-Okay im sorry" he shot out and you nodded, sticking your tongue out.

"Yeah you better be. I was just admiring Ejiros awesome quirk" you grumbled, turning back to Kirishima and rolling your eyes as you both chuckled at the interaction

"Did you mean that?" He asked softly and you tilted your head slightly, confused. "About my quirk. I mean"

You nodded immediately, smiling at him. He blushed again.

"Yeah of course! Your quirk is awesome, your gonna make a great hero one day" you grinned and he smiled back, his confidence growing at your statement.

"Really! Thanks!" He grinned and then paused "hey! You never told me what yours is"

"Oh, um. Its not good. Its like a villain quirk if im gonna be honest. I can manipulate my blood" you mumbled and Ejiro eyes widened slightly. “It sounds like such villain quirk”

"No! Its pretty cool. I guess if it was other peoples blood that you could only use would be bad haha, how does it work" he smiled, leaning forward wanting to learn more.

"I, um. I can control just my blood and turn it into things but thats it, if I loose focus it’ll just turn back into liquid” you explained, fiddling with my fingers. You never really got good responses from others. They were always afraid id take their blood..

"Can you show me?" He asked, not one bit weirded out. You made him feel good about his, it is a manly thing to do to make someone feel better

You looked at him, slightly surprised. All the kids you went to school with thought you were a freak. Albeit you are not natural in the slightest. You brought your index finger to one if your fangs, biting down and pricking it. You watched as blood dripped out and stared at it. You watched as it moved upwards, before contorting it into a small circle.

"Woah! Thats so cool! You can practically make anything" he looked at the little ball blade. "Does it harden or stay liquid?"

"It hardens, look" you pushed the ball around in your palm, it left no trail but soon it disappeared.

"Hey, what happened?" He asked and you looked up at him.

"It does that, the small ones i make dont stay for very long" he nodded in acknowledgement and a peaceful silence took over but it really didnt last long until a slightly tired and almost bored voice spoke.

“Welcome to U.A hero course. I suggest you shut up. If you are only here to make friends I suggest you leave now” the class fell silent and everyone turned to stare at the black haired man who was taking a yellow sleeping bag off at the front of the room. You couldn’t help the small smile edge onto your face at your fathers antics

“My name is Shota Aizawa. Your teacher” he continued.

“Now everyone put these on and follow me outside”

♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎

You were now outside in your gym uniform. You all stood as Aizawa explained that he wanted to gauge you strengths and whoever gets the lowest is being expelled. The sun was pretty bright today.

"Bakugou, you scored highest in the entrance exam, why dont you go first" Aizawa stated and bakugou stepped up, taking the ball and stepping into the circle.

"DIE!" He yelled as he threw the ball using his quirk. The ball flew out of sight and aizawa recorded the score.

He got 705.2 metres.

"Yuri, youre next" he stated and you stepped forward as you were handed a ball.

You stepped into the ring and took a deep breath, concentrating and feeling your body prickle. The birds chirped louder and everything felt sharper. You pulled your arm back and threw with all your might. The ball soared into the sky becoming nothing more as the blue swallowed it. You didn’t think youd do as good as Bakugou. It was sunny and the sun causes weakness in your senses.

Aizawa turned the phone and you saw your score 706. You smiled and turned round seeing kirishima giving you a thumbs up and a smile. Bakugou however growled as you walked back he grabbed your wrist. Aizawa turning away as his phone rang.

"What the hell! You’re just a small weakling!" He snapped as he glared down at you and you swallowed thickly.

"Its just part of my quirk. I can increase my strength with my blood" you whispered, feeling very intimidated by the seething blonde over you.

“Bakugou, leave her alone. She beat you that just means shes working harder than you” Aizawa muttered and Bakugou grumbled, tossing your wrist aside and stomping back over to where he previously stood. You walked back to kirishima who gave a soft smile and patted your head making you giggle. You watched as everyone took turns before feeling someone nudge your arm and you looked to your right.

You moved on with the next exercise. It was a timed sprint. You watched as bakugou used his quirk and fired himself forward. Iida obviously excelling at this task with his engines on his calves. There was a girl who tapped her feet and watched as she rang across but she looked weightless.

It was now your turn and you were against tsuyu. She had frog like qualities. That was common, something similar to you. You smiled again as you got ready, when you were told to go before anyone could even comprehend what happened you stood at the finish line. Tsuyu cane fo the end also, hopping her way. She smiled at you and congratulated you. You walked over to the girl with short brown hair and smiled at her. Her quirk seemed cool.

"Hey whats your name?" You asked and she looked at you nervously. "Mines is Yuri”

"Oh its Uraraka Ochaco" she smiled. You smiled back, asking her what her quirk was.

"Oh! Its called zero gravity. I can make things float by touching them and making them weightless but it does make me feel sick!" She explained "whats yours?"

"I have heightened senses-" she cut you off

"Yeah i seen that! You practically teleported, it was so cool!" She grinned and you blushed slightly not used to compliments

"Th-Thank you! Your quirk is also super cool! I mean making things float that would be so helpful in rescuing people!" You grinned and she nodded, hearing aizawa state the next exercise. The day went on, one after one everyone competed and you did pretty good.

Izuku broke his finger. You gauged that he maybe has super strength and his body simply cannot handle it. He isnt very built when you look at him so that may be it.

The leaderboard appeared. You placed fourth. You smiled as you all entered back into the changing rooms. You took your clothes from your locker and walked out, seeing the bathroom straight ahead some boys were already done changing. One was kirishima.

"Hey Yuri. The changing room is that way" he stated nodding his head in the direction you came and you nodded.

"I know but i dont like getting changed infront of people" you mumbled, slightly embarrassed, looking as Kaminari, mineta and bakugou stared at you.

"O-Oh. Wait! Dont be embarrassed. That's completely normal" he stammered out and you say as mineta appeared beside him, so not manly of him to make you feel embarrassed!

"If you need any help Yuri. Ill certainly be of good assistance" he smirked, raising his eyebrows up and down suggestively.

"Ugh! You freaking PERVERT!" You shouted at him and he backed away, glaring at the purple pervert.

"Ok-okay! Geez, offer a woman some help and they act like that" he grumbled ready to turn around but you felt yourself grow angrier at his words. You reached out and grabbed his wrist, pulling him back as you leaned down closely to his face.

"Excuse me! Why would i want a boy to help me get changed. Im perfectly capable of changing myself! You're such a PERVERT Mineta! Who do you think you are saying those things! Ugh! im gonna kill you" you growled at the boy who paled at your face. Your sharp fangs were on display and your crimson eyes glowered at the boy.

"Geez! What are you Bakugous girlfriend, getting so hotheaded!” He cried, pulling away from you and running behind kaminari.

You rolled your eyes, turning and going to the bathroom to get changed. When you exited. Kirishima invited you to join them for lunch. You were pretty hungry.

[compassionatereminders]

Hi kat, im not doing so well recently. You maybe remember an anon ask almost two months ago saying that theirs parents are getting a divorce, that was me.

My life's going downhill, everything is getting worse, everyday that passes seems to just get worse.

Since that day, i wasnt able to feel like i was in my body anymore. Or maybe, to be more accurate, it felt, feel, like everything is a dream. And is so tirying, its so frustranting. I want to feel like im truly present again. But i dont know how.

And of course there was a booking problem with my therapist, and now im going to be able to see her again just in the end of the month. I can't speak about this with my parents, they do not. And i repeat. Do not understand. They will say something stupid. I got hurt from their words too many times already, i dont want to look for them for any mental help anymore. Dont have any friends that i feel like telling would be a good idea, neither. I feel so lonely its actually ridiculous.

Everything is dull yet I still feel every negative emotion. I dont want it to be like that. I was having a relatively good life before the divorce and I thought it was bad already!! Its pathetic. I dont really know who i am anymore. Sorry for the depressing vent, i really hope you had a great day

I trust that telling your parents is not a good option, but I hope the therapist can help you and that you'll find other people who can support you through all of this ❤️

[lazyalani]

Hello, I hope you're well! I hope I'm not bothering you, but if I understood correctly then you currently have requests open for Black Butler?

If I'm wrong, please feel free to delete this ask. I appreciate you taking the time to read it regardless!

If I'm not, then may I please request for Black Butler? I have all kinds of ideas myself about a situation where Ciel brings in another member of staff to help Mey-Rin out with cleaning since she can be clumsy quite often. That being said, the person (Mc, reader, whoever you wish to refer to them as) isn't strong or spiritual or really that special of a person. Borderline Mary Sue with how normal their life seems, but maybe they could have something more to them than just being a normal human. How would some of the characters react to/interact with them? (Preferably romantic headcanons if that's okay, if not then feel free to change it however you wish!) My favorite characters at the manor are Snake and Sebastian, but if you want to add someone different feel free! If you only take one character per request, then can it please be Sebastian?

No pressure, no rush, you don't have to accept this. Thank you for reading my request anyway! I hope you have a lovely rest of your day, please take care of yourself and stay safe! 😊

| Black Butler [Phantomhive Estate]

| When Ciel brings in an assassin as a servant

| i was a little bit confused to what you meant as 'more than a normal human' but i assumed they aren't supernatural but not a normal civilian either, i hope this is okay, gosh im so nervous about this, but i love this request, i got this when i was in rites rehearsal in school lol, only a few dialogues, oc is gender neutral, i wasnt sure if i should put reader or oc but ig oc would fit more i hope its okay, this could also be read as reader cuz its gn anyway, i wanted to write this is fic form but i figured it would be too long, im sorry i couldn't do snake because im not really that familiar with him, this is my frist time taking up this kind of request, mixing up an assassin and romance is a bit confusing so sorry if i dont live up to your expectations, mc is referred to as 'they/them'

Ft. Ciel, Sebastian, Mey-Rin

| Kuroshitsuji Masterlist

| Main Masterlist

Extra Note: I was a lot more motivated to write this cuz you're so sweet :') lots of thanks and hugs for you

CIEL [Platonic]

Ciel encountered them during a mission as the guard dog. An assassin sent to kill him, who ofcourse, failed due to his demonic butler. After suffering an utter defeat on Sebastian's hands, Ciel had a risky idea of bringing them back with him to add to his army servants. He has seen great potential. Although Sebastian had not been fully pleased as it was risky because they were literally sent to kill them, he had respected his master's wishes but kept an eye on them. Waking up to an unknown bedroom and then suddenly being offered a chance to work for someone you were assigned to kill before was definitely surprising for them, but after observing how the 'job' works, they reluctantly accepted.

They weren't good at doing the housework, but they weren't bad either for someone who had just started to work. Still confused, they kept observing Ciel, wondering why they were even offered the job despite almost assassinating him.

"Young Master, may I ask a question?" They asked during dinner time, dusting shelves near the dining table.

"Because you're useful."

"Pardon me?"

"The answer to your question. You were going to ask why I had offered this to you, were you not?" He calmly sipped his tea, then lowering the cup to let Sebastian fill it. "Failed, but not helpless. Surely you understand why I have 'servants' like you, don't you? You'd prove to be a good ally against those pests."

".... Thank you, young master."

"You have yet to prove your full loyalty, show me your devotion, servant."

"Gladly, Earl Phantomhive."

And so they brought back the heads of their former client and their agency employer. With a few days of Sebastian still keeping an eye on them, they had slowly but surely earned the whole manor's trust.

They had soon gotten used to how their job works. Although still a bit clumsy, they had done their best to serve the Earl, gaining fondness for the child. Despite what others think, it was quite easy to have affections for the young master, whether it's out of sympathy or slowly just getting to know him. They understand what draws the other servants to their master. The Earl was cunning and ruthless, but he was still infact a child and in need of support. So they had grown to get used to taking care of him by doing simple actions and words, serving him with gentleness and fondness.

"Young Master, is the blood yours?"

"Young Master, please let me tend to your bruises."

"Young Master, it is time to eat."

"Young Master, what should I tell Sebastian to prepare?"

"Young Master, Bard has made something explode again, please civer your nose from the smoke."

"Young Master, I heard this tea is good for soothing headaches."

"Young Master, I believe it is time to rest."

As an assassin, they understand what it's like to kill. To have a shitty and frustrating background. To have to kill to survive and get what you want. To have to be cautious everytime. To not affording to let your guard down knowing the dangers of your world.

And so they are cautious and wary of anyone getting close to him. A visitor or anyone that's not originally a part of his life before. They always keep them, hence why they requested to have a slight change on their uniform to hide it.

They had heard his story from the other servants and came to an understanding of what Ciel really wants to do, to achieve. Revenge, and if it means protecting the boy and letting him live as much as he can, they will help him towards that goal.

It's only when they are in a mission and they are involved that Ciel is reminded that they are a professional assassin still.

It does make him more confident that while Sebastian is out fighting the main enemy or hunting someone, they can protect him, not letting any other enemy near him and killing them all before they can even take a step forward. It gives him chills, the same ones he feels when Sebastian shows his true abilities. It terrifies him that a human could kill so easily like a demon, and relieves him that he took them in.

Eventually, Ciel has gotten used to their subtle (not really) smothering and protectiveness. He was bothered at first, but he just let it be until he does get used to it, it's a great balance to Sebastian's sarcastic and teasing nature at times. And althought he would never admit it, he does look forward to getting pampered after a long day or mission and not get teased for it (Sebby srlsy).

SEBASTIAN [Romantic]

When he doesn't trust them yet, he sees them as a potential formidable enemy. They may not have defeated him, but they still put up quite the fight for a few minutes. Although defeated, not completely. They might not be a danger for him but they are great danger to his master, being inside the estate and meddling with other servants. He does find them a bit interesting. Normal people may not see it, the assassin's face is neutral, but their eyes are readable, atleast to him. It interests him how their eyes keep on changing emotions, curiosity, observant, interested, empathetic, understanding, sympathetic, pleased, distressed, frustrated, disagreeing, surprised. It interests him how much a human could keep on changing through so many emotions in a short time, and manage to keep it hidden under a neutral mask. And it interests him how they could keep such a calm manner while suspecting something about him.

Sebastian could see it in their eyes whenever they see or interact with him. Cautious, observing, curious. He knows they suspect he isn't human. Ofcourse, what human could do those things he did during their fight. But still, they had kept quiet about it and never asked questions, atleast not verbally. Sebastian could see so many questions hidden in their eyes, and it amuses him to see how they try to keep those questions in. It amuses him how they could really reign their own thoughts and questions despite seeing and interacting with him everyday.

When they had gained his trust, he lets his guard down just a little bit more. He admits, he finds it comforting to finally have someone competent enough in the household to help him. It's not that he really needs help, it's just that he finds it quite a bother and annoying to do every chore while doing his tasks as the Guard Dog's 'assistant' or something.

It's not really a secret that Sebastian finds it easier to be around them than the others. The way his stiffness is nowhere to be found around them, and his voice seems to be less strict. He knows and he doesn't really care when even the Earl points it out. He claims it should serve as a motivation for the others to start working harder if they don't want him to always nag them. Ofcourse he and Ciel knows there's more to it but they don't care (though Ciel definitely would save his thoughts about it for future purposes).

After a while, their curiousty does fade into just being neutral and not giving a shit about who he is or what he is. Despite having suspicions, they let it be because knowing he keeps their master safe is enough. Although they are a bit wary to how he is connected to the young master, they decide to push it down.

Sebastian and them act like normal co-workers as time passes.

"Goodmorning, Sebastian."

"Goodmorning. Has the utensil shelf been polished upstairs?"

"I did that yesterday, shall I do it again?"

"No need. Have the pests been taken care of? There were quite a few crawling around yesterday night."

"They have, I laid them in the 'garden' and let the others clean up. I will check on it again later to make sure the job is done perfectly."

"Good job. Make sure everything is fine while the young master and I take care if everything outside for later."

"Yes. Is the young master still asleep? He didn't overwork himself again, didn't he?"

"It seems that he quite did, seeing as he is still asleep right now and not calling for me. I shall get him ready for the day, I'll leave you to do the rest."

"Yes."

Sebastian does prefer interacting with them than anybody else. Okay, maybe not normal co-workers, but the most normal talk murderers pretending to be servants could do. He prefers talking to them more than any servant because they understand how he talks about the things that aren't meant to be said around anyone else. They have the intelligence Sebastian wants a subordinate to have and he's quite greatful for it. It pleases him that he can now take a little bit more time outside the manor without worrying about it burning down or the young master's safety.

Afterall, their new servant is very skilled in doing their job.

But the main reason it that because he could show sides of himself that aren't meant to be seen even by the other servants. While he may not show his true nature, he does show a little bit of non-human capabilities. Not needing to worry about it makes things easier for him, also because they can cover for him at tines. Their neutral and usual they don't care nature puts him at ease. And them being an assassin definitely adds more ease. Knowing how to kill, and anything that involves it makes it easier for him to slip out and ask a bit help.

It reaches to the point where interacting with them puts him at ease after a long day or after an annoying event. Sebastian is definitely more comfortable around them than anyone else.

He does know what it means. He knows what the little tingle feeling he feels when he hears their voice. He knows what the ease on his back means when he sees them. And he doesn't mind at all. It feels good so why would he deny it? Although it could propose a few problems in the future, but he'll worry about it when it gets there.

When he realizes it, he gets a little more softer on them.

"Job well done as usual."

"After dusting that, you may take a rest."

"Have you eaten? The food I made a while ago is still fresh."

"Ah, do be careful dealing with those pests, they might be quite a handful."

"I imagine you might be tired from dealing with those cockroaches, the tea is still hot, it is good for body pains."

And yes, other people do notice. And yes, Ciel does know, and he doesn't give a shit as long as it doesn't interfere with their missions and tasks. Plus, it gives him opportunities to tease his butler back.

It also adds that whatever is going on will not have to interfere with his tasks to his master because he knows full well that they can protect theirself, the household, and the young master. They are a professional assassin and does not need protection and direct orders and intructions to kill and hunt.

In any case, Sebastian and them would deal with their growing affections slowly and quietly, letting it grow further while letting the each other savor it.

As times passes by, Sebastian does get a little bit more bold with his words and actions. He grows quite more confident when they reciprocate his advances.

All in all, Sebastian was drawn to them because he can show a little more if his true self around them. Because despite disgusing as a servant, they don't exactly differ from when they act as an assassin or a servant. They don't lose their personality and turn into a normal person when changing roles. They are competent in any role they take and know what needs to be done, how to talk about house chores and how to talk about other things, when to meddle, what to do, what needs to be left unasked, how to deal with their emotions efficiently, and does not get distracted by the slights of things.

MEY-RIN [Platonic]

Mey-rin sees them as an older sibling.

Sure they might be monotone and apathetic at most times, but their caring nature makes her think otherwise.

"Mey-rin, be careful, you might fall down."

"Please don't move too much, you might get injured."

"Ah, use this instead of that, this is more effective."

"Oh, don't do that, it will make blood flow out more."

They definitely scare her when they are at the battlefield. Those emotionless eyes and monotone voice are more terryfing than everything when they hold their katana and slash through the enemies. The thought of them being their ally when they keep enemies from coming at her makes her calm.

Merciless, definitely. But she sees them a bit different inside the manor. Those scary eyes are replaced by a neutral face. They rarely smile but she can see their caring actions towards everyone, especially towards their young master.

She was definitely more than happy to know that they can live up to Sebastian's standards in doing house chores because they definitely need help. Although she is ashamed and embarassed to be outdone and to ask for help from a new servant, she can't help but do it and admire them. She can't help but ask them to teach her, and she was happy to know that they agreed.

"I see, instead of doing that, I think you should do it sideways so the duster can cover everything."

"Try cleaning in a more staright posture so you don't fall down."

"How about starting at the top so you don't fall down bending when you start at the bottom of the stairs?"

"I am glad to be of help."

She does look up to them so much. She is very glad that they are as competent in the house chores as they are in the battlefield.

When she observes then, she can quite see the similarities of when they are outside. They still have that stealth when they are walking, that swiftness and speed when doing chores, the effiency when doing tasks, and the quality when doing everything.

It honestly terrifies her how they can just kill so easily without any trace of emotion and pretend to be a normal servant as though nothing happens at night.

Despite obviously having a crush on their resident visual butler, he also does intimidate her in a way the new servant does.

The new servant does make her a little bit more scared, but it brushes of everytime she sees and hears them taking care of everyone. It makes her happy that under that apathetic face they wear, they truly care for all of them. And it makes her relieved that they aren't an enemy.

Ofcourse, she was wary of her before, all of them were. But they did see their improvement. From doing chores improvement to socializing improvement.

When they kind of 'nag' her to be careful on standing in chairs to dust the shelves and clean the stairs, she feels warm. It feels like having an older sibling nag at you to take care of yourself.

They also have the room next to Mey-rin, and when she has her nightmares about her past, they come comforting her. Despite the usual monotone of their voice, she can feel their concern. They may not be much of a talker, their comfort is quiet, but it's enough for her that they listen to her thoughts and worries and understand her.

They also remind her to change her glasses when it's near breaking. Or when she falls and breaks her glasses, they always offer to buy a new one and let her rest and tend to her small bruises.

All in all, she's glad to have someone who can be there for when she's sniper Mey-rin, maid Mey-rin, and sad Mey-rin.