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aritamargarita · 2 years ago

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ATTITUDE || 010

WAKE UP BABE ARITA JUST POSTED ATTITUDE!! BY POPULAR DEMAND! i keep lying y’all… im sorry but here it is. look, tinier text! i kind of like this better?? that’s right folks i revised this entire chapter LOL you won’t be sorry…

tbh i don’t know where we are omfg i just know what episode we’re basing this, which is smackdown 11/22/2001, (which now that i look back i really messed up chronologically but AHHHHHHHH) oh well, im gonna do shows randomly ill jump from november to august if i have to omg

HOWEVER, you are starting to get regularly scheduled matches yessss. also ive noticed i accidentally kinda made the alignment heel-ish but at the same time leaning towards face?? tweener? tweener… i would also like to add that your moveset is like a mix of like liv morgan and sasha banks? maybe a SPRINKLE of alexa bliss???? fuck what anyone says YOU CAME FIRST YOU WERE THE BLUEPRINTTT wwe 2k22 stays on during writing

IM SPLITTING THIS UP BECAUSE ITS A LOT! this is 1/2, so keep your eyes peeled for #2. get hype for your match + lita takin you out to get smashed. (there’s something she needs to tell you!)

BACKSTAGE // 6:50 PM

Upon stretching with Trish, you held up the letter she gave you with two index fingers. “This is yours, right?”

The women’s champion recognized the letter immediately and withdrew from her position on the floor, suddenly pacing around. “Yeah. I left it there for you. Didn’t know ya’ found it so easily, hahah!” She threw out her arms in a dramatic fashion.

..It was kind of easy to tell she was nervous, even if it was a little bit. But you couldn’t blame her. The anticipation of seeing if someone liked your gift was very heart-racing.

But rest assured, you thought it was a nice gesture! She had no need to worry.

“It’s very nice,” You comment, holding the letter in your free hand while stretching the other towards your foot. “—the design, I mostly mean. I didn’t open it just yet, but I’m going to get around to it. I have like a bunch in my bag, so I need some time to sort through.”

“Right, right...” Trish suddenly snapped her fingers, remembering something important. “I’ve gotta get ready for my match! It’s supposed to be messy tonight.”

“Messy?” You repeat, your interest piqued.

“Gravy bowl. Like, a pool of gravy.”

“Ew.”

“Exactly.” She laughed. “Oh well. I guess if I can have fun, it doesn’t matter what I do.”

“That’s the spirit, Miss Stratus,” You chime, standing up from your spot. “I’ll cheer you on from backstage, then I’ll just go home. I have literally nothing to do.”

“Huh? Don’t you have things to do today though?” She asked.

“...What?”

Trish shifted around in her bag for a moment before walking over and shoving a piece of paper in your face. “Read it, but don’t weep.”

Your eyes scanned down the lines of matches....

TEST VS. SCOTTY 2 HOTTY

STACY KEIBLER VS. TRISH STRATUS

CHRISTIAN VS. EDGE (INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE MATCH)

TAZZ VS. BIG SHOW

KURT ANGLE VS. UNDERTAKER

STONE COLD & [NAME] VS. CHRIS JERICHO

RVD & THE ROCK VS. THE DUDLEY BOYZ

Holy handicap match! Did they seriously schedule that? But considering the segment that happened between you three previously..you didn’t put it past them that they’d do that.

But not only that, your eyes kept going until you landed on some words that were in tinier font at the bottom of the paper. Your name was written in the “segment mentions” section. Was that always there? They must have just recently added it, because you sure as hell never noticed.

You had thought about one of the other matches too. How interesting was that, to see Christian go against Edge for his title...it was champion versus champion just to get another championship. You’d have to remind yourself to give at least the both of them words of encouragement.

But she was right. You did have a segment. They must have updated the list at the last minute because you had no clue that you were supposed to do something for your show TONIGHT. You thought it was next week, but instead they decided to push it earlier. Ugh.

“Huh, who would’ve thought, right?”

“Get your stuff together, hotshot.” She taunted, a smile on her face.

“Get your stuff together, champ.” You fire back, shifting to a much more comfortable spot to reach your own belongings. You shove the card (coupled with a heart shaped box) into her face much like she did to yours. “This is for you. Weep all you want!”

“Color me surprised.” She says, taking the card from your hand. “I didn’t know you actually got me something. Thanks a lot, I’ll take a look after my match. See you.” With a small wave, she departed the locker room.

You wave back. You also didn’t want to ask Trish to come in earlier than she was scheduled to, she already had enough on her plate with that gravy match or whatever. It was fine if she came next week. The question was what could you do in substitution for that?

Suddenly, it hit you.

You’re supposed to be a heel right? Sure, you switched sides and were supposed to turn face, but who says your mean streak has to come full stop?

Those letters could definitely give you some leverage, and of course give you fake heat backstage for the sake of cementing your role.

All you needed was fake envelopes, a lighter, and the acceptance from creative to burn stuff. Maybe even sign some sort of waiver. Doesn’t matter. You didn’t care if it was in a parking lot or during your slot. You needed SOMETHING to get the interest out of the crowd.

...Is this how villains think? Just thinking about how mean you’d be was almost hilarious! It was so unlike you but being the enemy was fun. Sometimes.

Thanks to your very rushed purchases, you noticed that out of at least 25 cards, 10 were duplicates of others. You were only going to return the favor of whoever gave you one, so the rest were just trash, technically.

You could burn those! Perfect.

Now that that was settled, you had to think about handing out more gifts. Whoever you saw first got their gift first. As soon as you exited the room with the bag, you bumped into someone.

“Oops, sorry. I was just going in there.”

It was none other than Lita, who seemed to have pop up at the right moment. At least you wouldn’t have to go too far. However...the Hardyz were nowhere to be found. You’d at least think they’d be a little ways from her. Either way, time to kill two birds with one stone.

But unfortunately, she didn’t seem too happy. You impulsively asked the first thing on your mind: “Are you okay?”

“I guess.”

“....” You frown, but give a small shrug. “I’m willing to hear you out if it makes things better?”

Lita says nothing in response, thinking about your offer. She let out a huff and drags you right back into the locker room. She did not let go of your wrist either. “I…..We got in a fight. All three of us.”

“All three?” You question.

“Me, Matt, and Jeff. Matt was yelling at Jeff for his “terrible decisions”, and that’s when I got mad and told Matt off about his.” She shook her head. “So stupid. I told Matt to leave me alone and I stormed out. Now here I am.”

“That’s rough,” You say. Was it really your place to give advice? The damage had already been done and besides, this wasn’t exactly your battle. “—I’m sorry to hear you guys were arguing. But I think I can make your day a little better.” You hadn’t even realized Lita’s grip on your arm until you moved it slightly. “First off, you have to let me go, haha.”

“Sorry.” She apologizes, letting go. She then used her now free hand to run through her hair.

“Funnily enough, I was actually leaving out to look for you and your little bodyguards.” You comment, reaching in your bag to hand over the loot, to which she looked shocked to see.

“...Seriously?” She almost thought it was a joke, eyeing you and the gift. But her suspicion immediately broke down into a smirk after realizing what you said earlier. “And my bodyguards? You don’t mean Jeff and Matt, do you?”

“Of course I do. But I guess I’ll find them on my own time. If you don’t make up that is.”

Lita wasn’t going to complain either. She wasn’t going to decline a present. “Thanks, [Name]. If you really want them to get these, then be sure to pass the message on to them too.” Much to her chagrin, she was happy to indulge you. It was the least she could do.

“You’re welcome.” You stare at her for a moment before walking forward and giving her a hug. She definitely deserved it. Even if she jokingly mentioned how clingy you were. Nevertheless, she accepted it and you two part.

“Hey,” She suddenly says, starting to open the box. “—are you busy after the show?”

“No, why?” You ask.

“I wanted you to go with me to a bar or something. I’m kinda stressed and I wanna have some fun.” She proclaimed, immediately digging into the chocolate.

An invitation to hang out?! You couldn’t decline, but if it’s a bar, you won’t be drinking much. It’s not like you were a lightweight or anything, it just wasn’t your style. “I don’t see why not.” You shrug, accepting. “Just us?”

“Yup. Just us. You want someone else to come?”

“No, no. Just was curious. I mean like...”

“I’m not inviting those two, if that’s what you think.” Lita clarified, closing the box. “Remember, we got in an argument, so..”

“Hah. Right.” You say, immediately shaking your head. It would be a pretty stupid to invite them after having a pretty hard argument.

If she wanted to hang out, then so be it. This would be the most action packed girls night ever!

At least you think it will be...

As you were making your rounds through the hallways, you noticed someone that you’ve been meaning to spark up a conversation with. “Ah! Hey! Christian..right?”

You call, leaning over beside him to get his attention. “We’ve met before. You called me short I think.. or was it tiny??” You trailed off, trying to remember what he said.

Christian stares at you for a moment, before snapping his fingers. “Oh yeah.” He turns to face you, a grin on his face. “I remember you! You’re that fan, right?” He jested. “The one who wanted an autograph.”

“Not even close...” You roll your eyes, crossing your arms. The smile on your face didn’t help at all. “I just came to wish you good luck on your match with Edge. I know you’re champion and all,” You motion towards his championship, unsure if you should touch or not. Ogling at it seemed okay, though.

“Is that so?” He asked. Man, he was one of the cocky ones, wasn’t he? Oh well, it’s not like you hadn’t dealt with this before! “Well, I appreciate it. I think you can get promoted to...hm...” He looks at you up and down quickly, trying to come up with a new nickname. “Got it. You’re promoted to, ‘Cheesy.’ Congrats, [Name]. Or should I say, cheesy.”

…What?

You were confused. What kind of nickname is cheesy? What the fuck does that even mean?? “Seriously? Why don’t you call me by my name?”

“Hah. I’ll think about it, seriously.” He says, taking off his belt to shine it with a cloth. “Coming out to watch like you did last time?”

“Am I allowed to?”

“Guess so. You’ve been there before, so I don’t see why they wouldn’t. Besides, I need someone to accompany me to the ring.”

Accompany him too? You’ll have to ask if it was alright to do that. Maybe you could even speak on commentary! That’d be fun. “Okay, then I’ll ask. But don’t be surprised if I don’t show up! I’ve got things to do.”

“Pretty disappointing then.” He admits, putting his finger on your forehead. “I’ll keep my eye out for you. If you can’t come out, I’m counting on you to watch backstage at least.”

You swat his hand. “Yeah, yeah! I’m sure you will be. We’ll see what happens. I can’t promise anything!” You hold your hands up in defense. “Are you nervous? I saw your match on the list and was thinking about how if either of you won, you’d be swimming in gold.”

“Not at all. I’m pretty confident, actually.” He hit his chest with his fist. “I’m pretty sure I’m gonna win tonight. I’ve got a trick up my sleeve.”

“A trick up your sleeve?” You narrowed your eyes, unsure of what he meant. Hopefully he wouldn’t cheat and instead pulled out some devastating finishing move. “I’m sure you do. Just don’t do anything stupid, okay?”

Christian gives you finger guns, saying nothing at all.

Which meant NO PROMISES.

“I should probably get ready now..” You say.

“Heh, looks like you talked so much, time just flew by.” He chuckled, adjusting the championship onto his waist and walking past you. “Get a move on, [Name].”

You nod before shaking your head. “Wait, did you just say my name? Where are you going?!”

Christian was just glad you didn’t ask how exactly he got this match. It was champion vs. champion after all. You just weren’t ready for that type of information. Had you known he and a few others beat him up...

It wouldn’t turn out well.

SMACK!DOWN // 7:13 PM

It’s time!

Your talk show segment was now. You jump in place as an attempt to ease your nerves in gorilla.

Personally, you never thought you’d get this far, let alone be so pushed. You prayed to whatever god that was out there that this would be all for naught, and you’d be left with little to nothing to do. People were a bit iffy on you and because of that, so it was VERY easy to incite a reaction from the audience.

Once you had made your way to the ring and grabbed a mic, you give a biiiig smile to the hard camera.

“Hi everyone!” You greet, and the crowd responds by roaring lightly. “Remember when I said something special was coming to Smackdown? Well, this it it!” You chime, taking a seat in your chair. “It’s me! I’m the special thing. No, no really. It’s this whole set, you see!”

‘Hey! It’s [Name]! And look what she’s doing..?’

You open your arms presenting the whole set, letting everyone drink it in. “Well, I hope you’re ready. This is...Time Out With [Name]!”

Upon raising your arms, balloons fell from the ceiling. It was definitely a pleasant surprise. What a fitting celebration! “I’m so excited! I hope you all are too. Now, you may be wondering, what’s in the bag, [Name]?”

‘..Sounds like she’s a little whacked in the head,’ JR says.

Jerry agreed. ‘Couple’a screws loose!’

“Well, I’ve got a lot of letters. I’m going to do the honors of reading you guys my very own fan mail.” You reach into it and pull out a letter. “This first one is from—“

Almost on cue, you were interrupted by familiar music. The lights dim, and you turn your attention towards the front. Here comes trouble.

Literally. The culprit was none other than Stephanie McMahon, the woman who was banished from the WWF the previous night. With a mic in her hand, she hastily makes her way to the ring. Of course, to make sure all the attention was on her, she wore the sparkliest garment possible.

She enters through the ropes, giving one look behind her one last time. You could tell she was on the verge of tears. “I-I’m not supposed to be here..but…!” Stephanie trails off, her voice cracking while the crowd had already begun to mock her.

All you could do was stare. Did she really just fucking interrupt you?! In the middle of YOUR talk show?!

She continues on. “..But I have to clear things up! And I knew you were going to have a talk show, [Name]! So please, talk to ME!” She begs, coming closer and grabbing your arm. You shake her off, but she’s still hopeful.

Some security they have, letting the “Billion Dollar Princess” in so freely. You scoff, holding up your mic. “Am I going to get in trouble for associating with you?”

“NO!” She squealed, immediately lowering her voice after she yelled at you. “N-No! I don’t think you will.”

You sigh, tossing the letter to the side for now. As it flutters to the ground, you exasperatedly threw your arm out. “Go ahead. Just say what you have to say.” You couldn’t believe she just walked out here. And to plead her case? This better be a good one!

Stephanie takes a deep breath. “I’m telling you, [Name]! No…!” She turns to the audience, doing a 360 as she points at everyone. “Y-You all saw everything!“ Then, she turns back to you. “You talked to my brother, he’s the mastermind! I just wanted to follow my in older brother’s steps!”

You hold up your hand, causing her to stop talking. “Uh, hey, Stephanie? What does any of this have to do with me? Genuine question.” The McMahons really were dragging you into this! You’re about to go kicking and screaming. “I know I was with you and Shane for a while, but you’d better go to someone else. I don’t think I can help you.”

Stephanie shakes her head. “You can! I just want my dad to see this. Him and everyone else need to hear my side of the story! Ask me anything! I’ll tell you the wholehearted truth!”

“Alright.” You say, shrugging. “Why’d you slap your own mother?” At this question, the crowd gasps. Stephanie was just as taken aback by the question, but bounced back quickly.

“Didn’t you hear me last time?” This time, she had a bit of attitude in her voice. “I said that Shane ordered me to do it. Did you seriously think I did everything on my own? I was naive, stupid. Everyone makes mistakes. Like you.” She says. “Remember? You took members of the Alliance out and joined the WWF? That was a mistake, right?”

“I mean…” You weren’t quite sure what to say. Well, you did, but you didn’t want to be too mean. “Those comparisons aren’t even remotely close. Besides, shouldn’t I be questioning you?”

Stephanie nods, letting it go for now. She’d do anything for forgiveness, and now that she’s hijacked came on your show, she felt like this could be her chance. “G-Go ahead.”

“Okay. Well, I’d like to just start with thank you for ruining what I wanted to do. I’ll just do it later.” You snidely remarked. “But now I’m curious. Why beg to stay when you know it’s over?”

She says nothing at your first comment, but walks a bit away from the center of the ring.

“I felt falsely accused and I felt as if I should’ve been given another chance. The thought of losing everything I have and…” She gags, covering her mouth. “Living in such..ugh, low-class ways makes me sick! I mean, can you imagine having to even drive yourself places? That’s what a chauffeur is for! [Name], when I got kicked out with my brother, we had to DRIVE all the way to the arena! Could you imagine having to do that everyday!?”

She’s..wow. Stephanie is definitely something. You just stare at her incredulously, but then bite back a sneer, instead replacing it with a smile. “No way! I couldn’t imagine that at all.”

“You get it! See, this is why I had so much faith in you when you were with us. You understand my problems and I’m glad I have the chance to talk to you!” Stephanie beams at you, happy that you’re sympathetic.

“Right. I’m sure it’s suuch a drag to y’know,” You pause, leaning on the ring ropes. “..do all the work by yourself?”

Double entendre? The crowd seemed to be laughing at how irritated you were and could completely understand. They felt the same way! Being so rudely interrupted after going to read the fan mail. Oh, the humanity!!

“Ugh, yes!” Stephanie walks towards you, fast enough so that you couldn’t even process what she was doing. “You get it! [Name], you’re the only one around here that has any sense!” She sticks out her hand. “Which is one of the reasons why I’ve come out here TONIGHT!”

What was she getting at?

“What do you mean?” You ask, looking at her in confusion.

“I want to be business partners!” There was no sign of tears whatsoever, her somber behavior quickly transforming into excitement. “You and me, kicking ass! I point, you destroy!”

“I don’t think that’s gonna happen.” You say, putting a hand on your hip. “I’m already partners Stone Cold Steve Austin,” Once you said his name, the crowd cheers. “Quite frankly, Stephanie, I have a feeling you wanted to ask that all along.”

She huffed, pulling away her hand. Her plan wasn’t going well and she knew as much. “No, it’s not just that. I really wanted to come here and plead my case. If I didn’t, you’d all think I’m some backstabbing bitch! I’d never do that. I’m really only…”

You join in on her sentence, the both of you talking in unison. “—A misunderstood young woman.” Nodding your head, you sigh for what must have been the thousandth time. “I don’t even know how they let you in here in the first place.”

“I snuck in.” She admits. “But c’mon. You’ve gotta think about it….please?”

And to make her happy so she’d literally leave you alone, you nod, holding out your hand. She shakes it, and that seals the deal.

Yeah, right. She interrupted your goddamn show!!

Letting go off your mic, you twist her around and tie her arms around her neck, giving her a Backstabber. The crowd pops at your attack, and you stand up from your spot, leaning over her.

“Try again next time.”

BACKSTAGE // 7:20 PM

The fact Stephanie had interrupted your talk show had made you upset. The thought of shaking her hand moreso. Once it had dawned on you, there was immediately a feeling of dread.

You had just “shook hands” with Stephanie McMahon. The witch, the conniving woman who’d rip your heart out if you ever made a mistake. And then you turned around and attacked her.

For some reason, you were scared. Scared of what she’d do with you in the aftermath. While she’d be out of the WWF for quite a while, you knew it would only be a matter of time before she returned.

What’s one way of relieving stress? By burning things, of course. You were going to set these letters on fire if it was the last thing you’d do. You had a cameraman with you in the parking lot. Your antics for the night were far from over.

“Before I was rudely interrupted, I wanted to talk about my letters. Unfortunately, I can’t do that.” You sigh. “I apologize to all my fans who wanted to hear my endearing voice read them out. Instead, I’d like to show an example.” You dump the rest of the letters onto the ground.

You go through your pockets, taking out a matchbox and removing ONE match. Quickly dragging it against the striker of the box, it flickers to life. You toss it over and the pile of letters are engulfed into flames. The camera turns over there for a brief moment, then back to you.

“I don’t think anyone understands that you’re all in my way! I don’t need any cheap ass letters to tell me that I’m great and amazing, that I am incredible and what have you.“ You say. “I’m not just some idiot who can’t work my way around the ring. I could out wrestle ANY of you, anytime of the week! And if you don’t believe me, come see me.”

While your message wasn’t long (you were told you had 10 more minutes), you thought it still got the message across. Anyone who wanted to mess with you was on their way to a world filled with hurt.

BACKSTAGE // 7:45 PM

And if it wasn’t for Stephanie ruining your show, the other devil on your shoulder had shown up just JUST THE RIGHT MOMENT.

Him. Yet again. Yet-a-fuckin-gain.

Jericho gives you a smirk, and the camera pans over to him. “Someone like you, burning letters. Never would have expected it. How’s my gift treating you? You must like it, given I haven’t seen it in the fire.”

“I wish you’d leave me alone.” You groan. “You’re always following me. And for your information, Austin actually threw it away for me!” It wasn’t true, but you just wanted to see his reaction.

You opened your mouth, but stop after realizing something important.

Back up a little bit. How exactly did Jericho know about your letters? You told no one about your plan and you made 100% sure no one was in the same parking lot while you did it.

"Wait a second." You say, waving your hand. "How'd you know what I burnt?"

His smug look turned into one of bewilderment. “I thought you knew already? Your best friend Torrie, she’s been running around talking about it.”

“She’s been WHAT?!” You look in awe and Jericho snorts at your reaction.“No, no, stop, what do you mean?”

“So much for being besties, huh [Name]? Well, she’s been saying you’ve been burning letters. She saw you do it out in the parking lot, now she’s telling whoever you’ve mentioned or whatever. I didn’t really care.” He muttered. “What you should be focused on, is our match.”

You simply roll your eyes. Oh yeah. You forgot that was a thing. Where’s Stone Cold when you need him?

Jericho comes closer to you. “And if you want, the Walls of Jericho doesn’t have to be the only hold you could be in tonight, sweetheart.”

You stare at him in disbelief for a second. How dare he say that to you?! Did he really think you’d go THAT low? And even try to imply you’d sleep with him? Absolutely not.

You had lifted your hand up to give him a hard slap across the face, resulting in the crowd gasping. Slapping him felt incredibly satisfying and he literally didn’t even know what hit him. The blonde brings up a hand to his now reddened cheek, scowling all the while you stomp down the hallway.

Him and his stupid match can sit in the back of your mind until the time comes. Until then, you’ve got some loose ends to tie up. Most importantly, you’ve gotta deal with Torrie (and maybe even Stacy, if she’s around. That’d just kill two birds with one stone. You technically weren’t “friends” anyway.)

So once you had seen a blonde woman just hanging around down the hall, all you found yourself rushing over there, ready to fight. “Hey!” You yell, setting your hand on her shoulder and turning her around roughly. “TORRIE—“

But this was not Torrie. In fact, it was actually Terri Runnels, who seemed scared that you abruptly turned her around like that. She held her hands up in defense and you can only sigh.

“Jeez, I’m sorry.” You apologize. “You’re…Terri, was it? Yeah, I’m really sorry.”

She gave you a nervous laugh in response, waving her hand. “Oh, it’s fine….” Before throwing her arms out. “Minus you scaring the hell out of me. What’s your deal!?”

“My ‘deal’ is that something really badhappened, and now I’m looking for Torrie. Have you seen her? You’re both blonde so I got you two mixed up. That’s my fault.” You felt incredibly bad for scaring her like that, but she should be thankful you didn’t just start beating her up first!

“Sorry sweetie,” She apologizes to you with a shrug. “Haven’t seen her at all today. What happened between you two?”

You sigh. It’s hard to explain what exactly went down. On the bright side, maybe Torrie hadn’t got that far. “Long story short, she’s been telling people something I did. And it’s a lie,” You add, which was another lie in itself… “One that might completely ruin my reputation."

“Well first off, you don’t go around threatening to beat people up.” She advised with a laugh. “Why don’t you try talking to her instead?”

“I feel like if talk to her, I’d drag her across the concrete.” You admit.

“Ivory should have put some of us into anger management classes…” Terri mutters. “Anyway, I still think you should try talking to her. No hostility, no…dragging her across the concrete.”

“I can try, but no promises.”

Definitely no promises.

SMACK!DOWN // 7:58 PM

Unfortunately after talking to someone about it, you couldn’t go out there for the match. You were a bit bummed out but they explained that you had a segment already and you’ve got a match coming up. They weren’t wrong, yes, you’ve got a lot to do tonight, but it doesn’t hurt to go back out one more time.

…..You just can’t believe this is your life now.

You’re definitely not complaining, but you never thought you’d get this far. It’s been a nice ride so far, which makes you wonder if the journey coming up will be hard.

“Hey, kid.” A familiar voice calls. “The hell you’ve been up to?” Stone Cold Steve Austin looks pretty beat up, holding his stomach as he speaks to you. “Heard ya’ been burning shit.”

“Noooo.” You groan. “It got to you?! She’s faster than I thought! And why do you look all busted?”

“I look busted because Regal and his little minions set me up in that ring earlier. How’dya not hear?”

You shrug. “I was focused on this whole Torrie thing..and if you got all beat up, shouldn’t you be resting?”

“I don’t have time to rest when we’ve gotta perform.”

There was a silence before you just decided to speak up. Funnily enough, him standing there literally felt like he was judging you, so you had to come clean. The tension broke you. “Yeah. I burned letters.” You admit, rubbing your temple. “I feel really really bad. And I don’t want anyone else to find out, but who knows how many people Torrie’s told?”

“I don’t see the problem with that.” Of course he didn’t, it was literally Stone Cold we’re talking about. “Ya’ just were disposing of crap you didn’t need.”

Crap you didn’t need? That definitely was one way to put it.

Austin continued on. “Don’t worry about the consequences. If people have an issue about what you do, let em’….and if they try saying otherwise, you take it to the ring.”

His and Terri’s advice were pretty different. To fight or not to fight….

“I’ve been doing things the way I like for years.” Austin reminded. “The consequences don’t faze me. People don’t faze me. Ya’ gonna let them mess your brain up.” He points to his head. “They get inside your head and take advantage of it. Instead of letting em�� do that, you hit first. So, how about it?” He says, patting your back harshly. “We get into that ring, kick that little pretty boy’s ass, then go home.”

“Yeah!” You sure as hell were. It was a good idea too. Maybe that match would get some of your pent up anger out. “And that’s the bottom line!”

You waited for him to continue his own line, but he looked at you as if you were stupid. “Sorry. I couldn’t help it.”

He shakes his head. “We’ll have to work on that. Get it together, [Name]. We can’t lose.” And he leaves it at that, simply leaving you with your own thoughts. Did Debra tell him to talk to you?

His words made you nervous, rightfully so. What would happen if you did lose? Would he be upset at you? Worse, you’d lose a teammate! Even more scarier that Stephanie wanted you to align with the McMahons..that couldn’t bode well.

It would make sense with you joining out of spite incase he betrays you, but after that, then what? Would creative just shelf you for now? Would you have to do gimmick matches? They were already a strong “stable” on their own, so someone else being added was a bit crazy in your opinion.

The idea of not knowing what came next kinda made you uncomfortable. Even if you should have been used to it in WCW (where things were WAY more disorganized), the feeling just made you feel icky.

“[Name]!” You immediately recognize that voice as Edge. A smile grows on your face as he approaches, but he doesn’t seem happy. And here came those cameras you knew oh so well.

“What’s wrong?”

He looks at you incredulously. “You’re seriously asking me what’s wrong? That’s just great.”

There’s gotta be something you’re missing here. “What are you talking about?”

“You should know what I’m talking about. Burning anything ring a bell??”

Oh fuck.

You had no idea what to say, you open your mouth but quickly shut it. Okay, maybe Torrie was well within the right to tell on you, but that wasn’t her place at all, damn it! Now they’d know you burnt everything! That you didn’t care about them! The only person you cared about was yourself.

In other words, the seeds were being planted!

The cameras were on you again, so you wanted to make this as dramatic as possible with him. “I just…it wasn’t like that at all, you’ve gotta..I didn’t mean it at all.”

“You didn’t?” Edge looked at you and you finally thought he would understand. That all would be well. “You didn’t mean it. Okay. It just gets worse, huh? The least you could do was check on me when I got beat up out in the ring earlier.”

“Wait, huh?”

“Didn’t know that, did you?”

No, no you didn’t. You couldn’t even defend yourself, so you decided to pull out the next best excuse.

“I’ve got my own match to focus on! I didn’t know! You can’t blame me for not watching….” It was going to have to do. “I couldn’t come out..”

Yet, he still wasn’t buying it. “With what partner? Stone Cold’s already been ambushed too. You must have not saw that either. Maybe try paying attention more next time. Man, this day just gets better and better. Continuously betrayed by my own brother, then I find out someone I’ve been interes….” He stops himself, coughing into his palm. “Someone I’ve been friends with, couldn’t care less about me.” He stared at you for a minute before turning around to leave.

“Wait a damn minute! You can’t just leave. And besides, I already saw him all beat up! Maybe if you were as good as him, you’d be raring and ready to go!” You yell, stomping right behind him. “But no! You’re running away!”

“Just shut up already, [Name].” He says, continuing his way down the hall.

This time, you didn’t follow, a new feeling of anger burning in your veins. The moment you lay your eyes on Torrie, IT IS ON.

hey! hey you! if you’ve made it to the end, YAY! thanks for reading and sticking around!! im working on fixing the spacer so it’s brighter pls bare with me. steve austin + reader duo is going to go on for a bit longer me thinks. *gives you both the tag team titles because i can*

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tsukkisbean · 4 years ago

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cuddling | headcanons

genre: fluff!!

characters: kuroo, bokuto, akaashi x gn!reader

warnings: none

a/n: idk how i feel about these but,,, inspired by conversations i had with some mutuals!! read under the cut for bokuto and akaashi! also sorry i got really soft for akaashi and ended up having a lot of dialogue hahaha,a,,

original request here

kuroo tetsurō

i know most people see kuroo as a super tough charismatic dude but sometimes he just wants to be coddled like a baby don’t even try to change my mind on this

after a particularly rough day at work he comes home with a tiny grey cloud over his head : ( he gives you a quick hug and kiss but doesn’t stick around for long

you finish up whatever you’re doing grab a bag of chips or something from the pantry and run up to your shared bedroom to find your boyfriend laying in bed on his side, under the covers

you peel the covers off his body and dangle the chips in front of him

“baby, do you want me to feed you?”

he can’t help but smile at you, tugging on your arm gently to pull you onto the bed with him

you happily oblige, immediately climbing in and snuggling up against his back

you prop yourself up onto your elbow, your hand gently threading through his messy bed head and he lets out a content sigh

he leans his head to rest on the crook of your neck, while you have one arm slung lazily around his waist, occasionally feeding him a chip or two

you throw one leg over his hip, and automatically his fingertips finds your leg, mindlessly tracing patterns over the fabric of your pajamas

he’s holding his phone in one hand, randomly playing through cute cat videos that show up on his recommended

“y/n should we get a cat?”

“if you really want one but why do you need one when you have me?”

his body rumbles with laughter in response to your snarky comment

before you can get mad at him he turns his body to catch your lips in a kiss

he sits up, pulling you up and into his lap, your legs automatically straddle his hips, and arms encircling his neck

“are you feeling better now?”

“y/n i never have a bad day with you in my life”

bokuto kōtarō

bokuto is away for a game so you’re at your shared apartment all by yourself for the weekend

to help pass the time you start a new show and you end up getting really into it

hours pass and now you’re wrapped up in a big blanket, sitting on top of a bunch of pillows on the floor in front of your tv, so into the show you don’t even hear the front door open, or the approaching footsteps or even the booming voice of your boyfriend that’s been calling you since he left the elevator (sorry neighbours)

being the impatient, excitable man that he is when you don’t respond for the nth time he decides to try to get your attention a different way

just as the show is about to hit it’s climax, your body is shoved to the floor, face stuffed into the pillows and you completely miss the big reveal

when you try to get up, your body is held down by a heavy weight that is your beefy (<33) boyfriend

“bo get OFF before i hurt you”

“you already hurt me when you ignored me for the past 5 minutes”

“wait when did you get home?”

“exactly my point y/n”

you have nothing to say to that so you just let him lay on top of you, his head resting on top of yours, arms and legs sprawled out

you reach one arm out, slipping it under bo’s and automatically his hand curls around yours

your other hand reaches behind you, gently curling and uncurling against the nape of his neck

while the two of you watch tv (mostly you because he has no idea what’s going on) he’s placing kisses all over your neck and on your cheek and jawline

“bo i’m trying to watch”

“pay attention to me :-(”

“the episode is almost over, i’ll pay attention to you after, okay?”

the episode comes to an end, and your half your body is asleep from being stuck in one position for so long and so you call out to your boyfriend to get him to move

when he doesn’t respond you notice how slow his breathing and how still his body is against yours in contrast to his usual energetic behind

then you realize he’s fallen asleep on top of you but you don’t mind because you know how hard he’s been working with his team

akaashi keiji

recently, akaashi’s been working late nights at the office so that he can meet deadlines so the two of you haven’t spent much time together

so when he gets home just after midnight he’s surprised when you come running to greet him at the front door but he immediately pulls you into his arms, and buries his face into the crook of your neck just drinking in your presence because he missed you that much

he knows he really should wash up and get ready for bed, but he can’t bear to leave your side so, still holding onto each other, the two you shuffle over to the living room, plopping onto the couch

you’re sitting between his legs, one of his hands intertwines with yours, the other holding one your favourite books, flipping to a random passage

his chin rests on your shoulder, whispering each line into your ear, occasionally pausing to place a chaste kiss on your cheek or temple

“i am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and i’ve led a common life. there are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. but in one respect i have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who’s ever lived: i’ve loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.”

his voice is so soothing, and you can feel yourself teetering between consciousness and sleep but you try your best to keep your eyes moment, not wanting morning to come where he’d have to leave you again

he shifts your positions, all while still holding your hand, so that the two of you are now laying down and this time your bodies are facing each other, legs tangled together

you hear a soft thunk as he places the book down on the coffee table, his now free hand making it’s way to rest on your back, tracing small patterns, mostly hearts to silently show you he loves you

his mouth is busy placing gentle kisses on the knuckles of your hand that’s still locked with his

“keiji, where do you see yourself in 10 years?”

he lets go of your hand, and you can’t help but feel sad at the sudden loss of warmth but the feeling quickly fades when both his arms hold you tight, your head meeting his chest

“here with you, just like this. only thing that’ll be different is that i’ll have put a gold band on your finger”

though he can’t see it, he can feel your lips part into a wide smile against his chest

the two of you lay there in your peaceful bliss, his steady heartbeat lulling you to sleep

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #kuroo x reader #bokuto x reader #akaashi x reader #kuroo tetsurou #bokuto kotarou #akaashi keiji #haikyuu x you #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu imagines #clara click clacks

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octbrsaturn · 4 years ago

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REPENT - ARVIN RUSSELL PART 4

a/n: hello :) part four is finally up! this chapter is definitely not the best i’ve written, but y’all deserve something. thank you for being so patient with me! i hope you enjoy

warnings: creepy bosses, creepy pastors

GIF USED DOES NOT BELONG TO ME !!!

The week went by quickly. It became a normal schedule -- Y/N had cheer practice until three o'clock, Arvin would pick her up then and take her straight to work. Recently, Ralph had been making Y/N work longer hours, which meant that she'd have to stay at work until eight or nine instead of seven. Then, Arvin would either drive to either her house or his house, let her take a shower, and fall asleep.

Y/N was exhausted. It was pretty obvious. She barely spoke (besides something small like 'mhm' or 'uh-huh'), she barely ate, and her grades were starting to slip.

Arvin looked over at Y/N, who's eyes were closed with her head leaning against the window. Arvin tried his hardest not to hit any bumps on the way to the diner, but every few minutes, he'd accidentally run over a pothole and cause Y/N's eyes to softly flutter open.

"Sorry," Arvin muttered quietly, glancing at his girl. He felt so terrible for her, wishing she didn’t have to work this hard. He wanted to walk into that damned diner, tell her weird boss that Y/N quit, and drive somewhere far away. But he knew that this was not a possibility, and that only made him feel worse.

"S'okay," Y/N whispered, keeping her eyes open as she realized that Arvin was getting closer to the diner. She sighed, wishing she could have just five more minutes to rest.

Arvin came to a stop at the diner as he usually did. Once he put the car in park, he looked at Y/N. "We're here."

Y/N nodded and sat up. A yawn came up in her throat, but she pushed it back down. She knew yawning would only make her feel more tired. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Arvin replied. His heart broke for Y/N. "Don't work yourself too hard, okay? I'll be here at eight-thirty. Promise.”

Y/N scoffed. "I'll try." She leaned forward and kissed Arvin's lips. She turned to get out, but before she could, Arvin grabbed her wrist. Y/N turned back to Arvin, her tired eyes focused on his.

Arvin sighed, feeling worse and worse for the girl. "I love you,"

Y/N gave the boy a soft smile. "I love you too."

Of course, Y/N's day was by far the hardest. Every customer she had was rude to her, she barely got any tips, and Ralph still had her scrubbing on that same damn grease spot that Y/N was pretty sure had been there for years.

Thankfully, it was Friday. Y/N could finish up her work, Arvin would pick her up, and they would spend the whole weekend together. That was currently the only thing keeping Y/N going, the thought of taking the weekend off without work or school and just being with Arvin and Lenora.

Another thing that made Y/N hopeful was that she'd finally made contact with her dad. She'd called him from the diner phone during her break about three times before he finally answered, with a gruff, "Hello."

"Dad?" Y/N almost whispered, just realizing how long it'd been without hearing her father's voice. When William Lewis didn't reply, Y/N continued, her voice shaking slightly. "Everything alright?"

William sighed. "Everything's alright, baby. I'm just sittin' 'round, writin' a few words."

This made Y/N's heart light up slightly. "You're writin'?"

"Oh, yeah," William answered, the joy that Y/N used to hear in his voice as a kid starting to come back. "I've written a few pages. It's not as fast as I used to be able to, but I'm getting there."

Y/N felt her mouth turn up into a smile. "That's alright, daddy. Better than nothin'."

"You've got that right, baby."

Y/N was silent for a moment, trying to collect her thoughts. Maybe her dad was finally out of the rut that he'd been in for years. For so long, her father had kept himself in his room, barely eating, barely talking, and refusing to write. When Marie died, he'd tried so hard to come off as 'strong' and 'collected', but the refusal to talk about his feelings eventually sent him into a depressed state. He'd refuse to talk to anyone, even Y/N, and he wouldn't even consider looking at a type-writer.

But now it seemed like maybe he was finally out of it.

"I'm gonna be spendin' the night with the Russells tonight," Y/N said softly.

"Sounds good to me, baby," William answered. "Be good for Ms. Russell, ya hear?"

"Of course," Y/N almost laughed. She just couldn't contain how happy she was that she was finally getting her father back. "I'll see you later. Love you."

"I love you too," William replied before hanging up the phone.

The rest of the night seemed to go differently for Y/N. The customers seemed nicer (though they were still considered rude, they didn't call her racially motivated names as much as they used to), Ralph mostly left her alone (of course besides the lewd stares at her legs and chest, but Y/N was used to that it this point), and the night seemed to go by much faster.

Eventually, eight-thirty rolled around. Y/N looked out to see Arvin's baby blue Bel-Air pulled up, the wind-shield wipers violently running back and forth against the wind-shield. Y/N made her way to the back of the diner and took off her apron. That feeling was definitely one of the best ones -- taking off her apron and hanging it up. Soon, she'd be able to take off her stupid blue waitress dress and her stupid hat and her stupid shoes and change into more comfortable clothes. Soon she'd get to stay up all night talking with Lenora and Arvin until she fell asleep and not have to wake up early the next day.

"Headin' out, Y/N?" A gruff voice asked as Y/N put away her apron. Y/N recognized the voice immediately. She felt her heart drop into her stomach.

"Oh, yes sir, Mr. Alby," Y/N replied, smiling at her boss but already starting to feel uncomfortable. The advances that he'd been making recently were starting to get worse. It started with the weird looks -- glancing at Y/N's chest whenever he thought she wasn't looking. Looking at her legs as she sat down or stood up. Then it moved onto a more physical approach -- touching her shoulder whenever he spoke with her. Kissing her cheek randomly. Unnecessarily grabbing onto her waist as he walked by. Each and every advance made Y/N more uncomfortable than the last. But she needed this job. She didn't know of anyone else who would give her a chance like this.

So Y/N just had to deal with it.

Unfortunately, this meant a lot of weird hugs from her boss.

Ralph nodded. “Well, have a good weekend. I’ll see you on Monday, right?”

Y/N smiled. “Yes sir.”

She watched as Ralph’s arms opened, knowing this meant he wanted another one of his weird hugs that Y/N despised giving. Y/N stepped closer, loosely wrapping her arms around Ralph’s shoulders for an uncomfortable hug.

After a second, she could feel Ralph's hand starting to slide down her back, getting closer and closer to somewhere that she definitely did not want his hand to be. Y/N felt herself start to pull away from the hug, but Ralph's grip on her wouldn't loosen. Y/N's heart began to beat harder as she tried to push herself away. But Ralph was relentless. His hand was now just getting to the small of her back, and only gripping harder as his hands almost reached their destination.

But before he could get there, Y/N heard the familiar ding of the door opening. Y/N looked through the small window the opened into the diner and saw Arvin standing there, wet from the rain. His dark gray shirt was almost black now from the heavy rain. His hair was curlier than usual and dripped water onto the floor. Y/N could see Arvin looking around, probably wondering where Y/N was.

Ralph looked over to see who had walked in, distracted for just a moment. Y/N pulled away from her boss and walked towards the front of the diner, giving him one last 'goodbye' and going to Arvin. She strutted towards Arvin, watching as his face lit up at the sight of her.

"What are you doing?" Y/N asked, grabbing onto Arvin's hand and pulling him out of the diner. The two jogged towards the car, trying to stay as dry as possible. Arvin opened the passenger's side door for Y/N and waited for her to climb in.

A part of Y/N was happy that her boyfriend came in and practically saved her from her boss, but the other side was nervous. All of those white people eating their food just witnessed a colored girl and a white boy holding hands and leaving a diner together. Things like that tended to make them nervous, and when they were nervous, they tend to make assumptions. And a lot of the time, assumptions get someone killed. Sure, it was none of their business, but that's never stopped anyone before.

"I got worried," Arvin explained, shutting the door and jogging to the other side. He got in and slammed the door shut beside him. "You were takin' longer than usual."

"Sorry," Y/N apologized. "My boss was talkin' to me."

"It's alright," Arvin began driving to his house. "Just makin' sure."

Back at the Russell house, Arvin pulled up as close to the house as he could, since the rain hadn't let up for even a second. He and Y/N opened their doors, laughing lightly as they ran straight to the house and onto the porch. Before Y/N could open the door, Arvin grabbed onto her wrist to stop her. "Hold on just a second."

Y/N turned with a confused look. "Everything alright?"

"I just," Arvin sighed, his grip not faltering from Y/N's wrist. Y/N waited patiently for Arvin to continue. She knew how hard it was for him to speak his feelings.

Arvin stuck his tongue out between his lips, wetting them slightly. He needed a cigarette.

"I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you," Arvin said slowly, looking right into Y/N's eyes.

"What do you mean?" Y/N asked, moving her hand from Arvin's hold, but quickly taking his hand in hers instead. Her thumb gently rubbed the back of his hand.

"I'm just proud of you. For gettin' a job, holdin' your own. And for still doin' great in school and being on the cheerleadin' team. I know workin' at that diner ain't the most fun job in the world, and I can see how tired you've been. But I'm still proud of you." Arvin shrugged. "That's all."

Y/N felt as if her heart both rose and sank.

Y/N did hate her job. She hated the customers, she hated (most) of her coworkers, she hated her boss. She hated taking orders and taking their food out. She hated having piping hot coffee "accidentally" spilled on her nearly every day. She wanted so badly to just quit and pray that maybe a different, better run diner would hire her.

But now she couldn't. Not when Arvin just told her how proud he was of her for not giving up.

Y/N smiled up at her boyfriend, thanking him. He nodded and bent down, moving his hand to the back of Y/N's head and gently kissing her forehead. Next, he leaned closer and kissed her lips softly. Arvin loved the feeling of Y/N’s lips. They were always so soft. He loved the way Y/N’s hand would always grab onto his waist to hold onto, almost like if she didn’t grab onto him she would fall over. Like he was the only person that could hold her up. Kissing Y/N had to be one of Arvin’s favorite things.

After he pulled away, he nodded towards the door, gesturing that they could go inside now.

As she opened the door, Y/N and Arvin were bombarded with the strong scent of fried chicken. Y/N gave Arvin a confused look, which he returned to her. Arvin, whose hand hadn't moved from Y/N's waist, looked around for his grandmother, uncle, and step-sister.

"Gran'ma?" Arvin called out but was interrupted by many voices laughing from the kitchen.

"Oh! Arvin, honey, we're in here!" Emma called out from the dining room. Arvin and Y/N made their way to the dining room to see the rest of the Russells sitting around the table, eating. Y/N's eyes flickered around the table. She saw Emma, Earksell, Lenora, and ...

And Pastor Teagardin and his wife.

"Come sit with us, you two!" Emma smiled, gesturing for Y/N and Arvin to sit. Y/N and Arvin did so, Arvin pulling out a chair for Y/N to sit and pushing it in once she took her seat beside Lenora. He rounded the chair and sat beside her, his hand immediately landing on her thigh and rubbing the skin softly for a moment, to calm her. He could tell immediately that Y/N wasn’t comfortable with pastor Teagardin being there.

"What's goin' on?" Arvin asked, referring to the Teagardins who had never seemed interested enough to visit the Russells before now.

"Well, Pastor Teagardin and his wife decided to stop by and have dinner with us," Emma said happily. "Ain't that so sweet of them?"

"So sweet," Arvin muttered under his breath, grabbing a plate and getting some food. He must've been too worried about Y/N not getting too wet outside to notice that another car had been parked in front of the house.

Y/N also grabbed a plate and got some chicken, collard greens, mashed potatoes with gravy, and a roll. Sure, she was nervous, but she was still starved. As the dinner went on, she stayed almost completely silent the whole time, just eating her food and waiting for this night to be over.

"So, Y/N," Pastor Teagardin spoke, looking at the opposite end of the table where Y/N had just taken a bite out of her potatoes. Y/N could feel Arvin stiffen beside her, but she grabbed onto his hand to hopefully calm him. Y/N looked over at the pastor, waiting for him to continue. "Emma tells me you're workin' at the diner down the road."

Y/N nodded politely, swallowing her food, and taking a sip of her sweet tea. "Yes, sir."

"How do you like it?" Teagardin asked, watching the girl closely.

Y/N almost gulped. "I like it real well, sir. The pay is pretty good, and every so often I get a good tip."

Teagardin nodded. "That's good. You doin' alright at school?"

Y/N shrugged. "I'm doin' okay. Between school, cheer, and work, it can get to be a lot."

Pastor Teagardin nodded in understanding. "The Lord said, 'Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.' Philippians chapter four, verse six."

Y/N didn't know what to say to that. She nodded and took another bite of her mashed potatoes and gravy.

"What about y'all's relationship?" Teagardin continued, causing Arvin to start choking on his greens.

Y/N closed her eyes and sighed, wishing this night could be over. Once Arvin was able to breathe again, he looked up at the pastor and muttered out, "Sorry?"

"The Lord also said, 'Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.' First Corinthians, chapter six, verses eighteen through twenty." Teagardin said, glancing over at Emma, who looked like she was about to faint right there.

Arvin didn't want to make this night worse. He really didn't. He wanted to finish up their dinner, scoop Y/N into his arms, and fall asleep on his bed. He wanted to wake up in the middle of the day tomorrow and take her on a picnic somewhere in a grassy valley, maybe even take another nap there too. He did not want to fan the flame that was Pastor Teagardin.

But he just couldn't help himself.

"Are you implyin' that me and Y/N have been sexually immoral?" Arvin asked, sitting up in his chair a little bit. Y/N could already see his face beginning to redden with anger. She wanted so badly to get up, grab Arvin, and lock them in his room for the rest of the night. But she sat in her seat with her head down, playing with her food.

"Arvin," Emma gently whispered, but Arvin ignored her, not looking away from the pastor.

"I'm not tryin' to imply anything," Teagardin shook his head, looking between Arvin and Y/N. He noticed how different the two were, besides physical. Arvin was fully sat up, arms crossed and staring deeply into his soul. Y/N, on the other hand, hadn't looked away from her plate. He did notice, however, that while one hand was playing with her food, the other was under the table and probably resting on Arvin's lap. "I'm simply statin' that y'all two better be careful."

"Why should we be careful?" Arvin didn't back down.

"Next time I may not be the one catchin' y'all in the backseat of your car, is all I'm sayin'." Teagardin said lowly, causing Emma to gasp quietly from her seat.

Arvin could only feel his heartbeat quickening. "Y'know, that reminds me," He cocked his head to the side, his eyes never leaving the pastor. "Why were you out there that night? What were you doin'?"

This question seemed to take the pastor by surprise. He swallowed thickly and looked around the room, noticing that everyone (including Y/N and his own wife) had their eyes on him, waiting for an answer.

Y/N had also been wondering the answer to this question. She found it a little odd that he happened to be driving around that late at night and decided to stop and talk to the two teenagers. She was eager to hear his side of the story.

"I was just ... " Teagardin started slowly. "I was just takin' a drive, is all."

Arvin hummed in fake understanding. "Takin' a drive that late at night? Sounds a little suspicious to me, sir."

"Arv," Y/N whispered harshly, squeezing his thigh gently, but Arvin couldn't stop. Pastor Teagardin talking about his and Y/N's relationship only fueled Arvin's anger. Teagardin knew nothing about those two. He was just some guy from Tennessee who thought because he was a pastor that he had to know everything about everyone. And Arvin was definitely the type of person who liked his privacy.

"What are you sayin' boy?" Teagardin nearly grunted. Arvin smirked, knowing he was making this man mad. That was what he wanted -- to make him mad. That way Arvin could show everyone that he shouldn't be trusted. Arvin knew that Emma, Lenora, and Earksell, and even Y/N had some sort of trust in this man.

"I'm not sayin' nothin'," Arvin shook his head and leaned back in his seat, knowing he'd made his mark. Teagardin was about to explode.

Y/N looked from Arvin to the pastor. She didn't dare utter a word, she was already not very fond of this entire conversation. A part of her was sort of pissed at Arvin for making this night harder than it should've been. She glanced over at Arvin with a glare, not happy with him. Arvin, now leaned back with his arms crossed over his strong chest, nearly smirked as he watched Teagardin try to calm himself down.

But then his eyes looked over at Y/N, and his heart dropped.

Did he go too far?

"I think we'll be headin' out now," Pastor Teagardin grumbled, standing up and helping his wife stand as well. Everyone else, except Arvin, followed in suit, standing and walking with the Teagardins over to the front door.

"Thank you so much for your time, pastor," Emma smiled graciously. She stuck out her hand for the pastor to shake, and he did so. After shaking her hand, he also shook Earksell's. Next, he looked over to Y/N and Lenora, taking both of their hands and kissing them. Y/N laughed uncomfortably and put both of her hands behind her back when the pastor let go.

Arvin, who was still sitting in the dining room, scoffed and rolled his eyes. It was pathetic watching the pastor try to move in on two teenage girls. Arvin was almost positive that Teagardin did that just because he knew how close Y/N and Lenora were to Arvin. Arvin stood and walked over to Y/N, grabbing her hand and pulling her away.

When they made it to Arvin's room, Arvin shut the door behind him. He didn't realize how upset he was until he felt Y/N grab his squeezed fists. His closed eyes then opened, looking straight into Y/N's. She looked beautiful. Her hair was a little messy from work, her eyes were lidded heavily, and her shoulders were slumped. But Arvin knew she'd stay up as late as he needed her to be, and that was one of the reasons he loved her.

"I'm okay," Arvin put his hands on Y/N's shoulders and rubbed, giving her a small massage. Y/N's eyes closed immediately and she let out a soft breath. "I'm okay."

"Are you sure?" Y/N asked, her eyes still shut from the relief.

Arvin pulled Y/N closer, wrapping his arms around his girl. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and slowly swayed them back and forth almost like they were dancing.

"Let's go to bed," Arvin whispered.

#arvin russell imagine #arvin russell x black!reader #tdatt #tdatt fanfiction #tom holland x reader #tom holland #the devil all the time #arvin russell imagines

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arabian-bloodstream · 4 years ago

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Why in Angela Kang I Trust

Maybe because I've been bruised and battered by showrunners and exec producers when it comes to couples and have also been rewarded (very, very, VERY rarely -- OK, like once), that is why I'm feeling positive about Caryl with regards to the spoilers.

Lemme give a bit of my history. I've had sooooo many couples, it's not even funny. I'm beyond a couple-girl. I've been involved in Harry Potter, Game of Thrones, The Vampire Diaries, Veronica Mars, The 100, Star Wars, Buffy the Vampire Slayer fandoms (and many more). Yeah, so I've been through some ups and downs in the fandoms themselves and with the end result of the product/my couple preference.

Two of the things that these fandoms taught me were (a) critical analysis of the product taking *everything* into account and not just my couple, and (b) how to deal with spoilers to keep myself sane.

NOTE: This is how I deal. I'm not telling anyone else how to feel or deal. This is my bag and what works for me and why I'm personally totally, 100% positive about Caryl despite the recent spoilers.

In one of my fandoms, I was heartbroken by how an episode played out. It made no sense to me. I had analyzed everything, paid attention to all the road signs... how could I have been so wrong? How could she choose the other guy??! It took a few weeks, but I re-thought everything and realized that I had been so focused on analyzing MY couple that I had ignored the OTHER couple. I had ignored the other aspects of the show and that other aspect mattered. It was like a bomb went off in my head. Suddenly something so obvious was now so clear to me.

From that moment on when I analyzed the show, I analyzed every character, every aspect of it and I gotta tell you all I just about nailed every character plot point. Not the twists/turns, but the emotional, character beats? I was right as rain on those. Because here's the obvious thing, no showrunner/headwriter is ever going to write for ONE character, ONE couple. They are going to write for every single character, every single couple. And if they are good writers they aren't going to take fanfic-like shortcuts to get them where we would like them to be, they are going to dig deep and explore who they are as characters to bring them organically to where they belong.

So... The Walking Dead. Angela Kang. Daryl Dixon. Carol Peletier. Caryl. (FINALLY! Ya'll say.) Angela Kang is a GOOD showrunner/headwriter. She brought TWD back from the disaster that Scott Gimple had made of the show. Seriously, I think 3-4 seasons went by and only 2 months had passed in that time. It was mostly a slow-moving morass of nothing happening with most characters doing nothing, barely connecting. Blech! It was mostly just not good. She whipped this show into shape.

Kang also took a long look at Carol, Daryl and Caryl and realized that in order to get them where they needed to be... which was TOGETHER ROMANTICALLY, they needed a helluva lot of work because Gimple had done ABSOLUTE SHIT with them for about 4 years. They had barely a handful of scenes over that time period, had been mostly separated and both characters had been decimated in completely different ways.

Carol's grief, guilt and horrendous actions had been completely and utterly sublimated. She told no one (including Daryl) about what happened with all of the children she had lost by her hand or through she felt because of her. So what did Kang do? She used the relationship that Gimple had begun with Ezekiel to create this fairytale fantasy that Carol could escape to since she couldn't be with her Alexandria family anymore because of that grief and guilt. She gave her that respite and escape until she was ready to live with the reality of all she'd done.

And then she opened the door to that grief and guilt with Henry's death, destroying that fairytale/fantasy so that she could finally begin to heal. And that is what we are finally getting now, a healing Carol. She's not whole yet, but she's stronger and she is healing. She's no longer hiding in some fantasy, she's no longer drowning in grief. And she's with her family again. She's come home.

I'm sure just as Kang looked at Carol, she also looked at Daryl and saw how Gimple had turned him into a monosyllablic follower. So, through the last two seasons, she's been building him up as the leader who's stepping up and also... HE SPEAKS! That's really the big thing, but it's such, such a big thing.

Finally, Caryl. To begin with, Kang's first episode made it perfectly obvious that it was a Zeke/Carol/Daryl triangle. However, because it's been sooooooooooooo long and the Caryl crowd has been battered for so long and the ABC crowd is so loud and even the media doesn't immediately jump to it despite the popularity of Caryl the obviousness of it just wasn't obvious. But the way Zeke proposed to Carol to which she did not say yes, his undying declaration of love to which she did not respond in kind to the way she curled up (yes, curled up!) against Daryl to tell him about said proposal and his response, clearly not happy about it, but willing to give her the go-ahead if she was happy was so obvious. I mean, DUDE! Yeah, that was textbook triangle material with the guy proposing being the clear loser in the equation in the long run. And that was Angela Kang's first episode as showrunner!

Everything that followed--the secret visits to him, her cutting his hair, her trust in him and vice-versa--to her leaving Zeke behind in Hilltop and going with Daryl to Alexandria, yeah, all of that was clearly going to be how that "triangle" ended based on that first episode. But so many Caryl fans were heartbroken, upset, furious about the Carol/Zeke spoilers. Of course, they were. We had no idea what Kang had in store. We'd been burned and battered and used and ignored by TWD, AMC, Gimple, et al. How could we possibly know that Kang had a plan all along and that the Carol/Zeke relationship was about paying time and attention to Carol's character and establishing a subtle triangle with Daryl in which he would emerge the victor?

But that's exactly what Angela Kang did. And then in season 10 she made it clear numerous times that it--only her second as showrunner--would feature the relationship of Carol and Daryl at the heart of it. So I have a few points I want to make regarding the upcoming spoilers taking ALL of the above that I've written into account:

1. Spoilers are tricky things. You simply can not know what is what until you actually watch the episode and even see the full arc play out. When you have a good showrunner/headwriter who has a plan and knows the path planned for the characters--one who has proven they know what they're doing--wait until you see what they are actually doing before assuming the roof is falling in. At least that's my philosophy.

2. I mentioned how the obviousness of the triangle aspect set-up in Kang's first episode as showrunner was so missed and a part of that is because of the fact that there is too much ambiguity in how Caryl and Daryl see one another. Is it friendship? Is it a mother/son (pfft! So fucking ridiculous!) relationship? Is it a sibling-like relationship? Or is it romantic/sexual? (YES, IT IS!) This very well may be what answers that question. (It’s the last one. It’s definitely the last one.)

3. 10x18 is STILL a part of season 10. According to Angela Kang, the heart of season 10 is the relationship of Carol and Daryl.

Finally, there are two characters left from the first season of this ten (of eleven) season show. Carol and Daryl. There is going to be a spin-off featuring Carol and Daryl. A character that Daryl has some sort of history with when he thought he lost Carol when she was married to someone else (after he had lost Rick) is NOT going to suddenly, randomly become the ONE to come between Carol and Daryl.

It doesn’t matter that this character is coming back in the final season. Sorry, not sorry, but it just does not. Carol and Daryl are the ONE for each other. This character is just another Ezekiel, a part of their story. Angela Kang has been organically, effortlessly rebuilding Carol and Daryl, and Caryl back up from the neglect and abuse that they suffered (especially Carol and Caryl) under Scott Gimple.

This is why I trust in Angela Kang.

#twd spoilers #caryl #caryl positivity #carol x daryl #daryl x carol #carol peletier #daryl dixon #the walking dead #in angela kang I trust #angela kang

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tomuraxashes · 4 years ago

Text

Found you - part 1

- Tenko! - a young, white haired boy run towards him from the swings.

- Touya-chan! How could you come? - he asked with confused tone in his voice.

He remembered his friend told him yesterday he wouldn't make it to come even today to the playground.

- Ah, it was easy. I convinced my mum to go and visit her parents together and after we came back I just asked her to take me out here. So I am here! - the young Todoroki smiled.

- Oh, I'm happy then. - the black haired boy said somehow delightfully, but his little cute face immediately turned back to the gloominess it was before - but wat if your dad finds out?

- Dont worry Tenko, after he learned that you are a Shimura, he doesn't really mind when I hang out with you. Sure, I still have to train but he allows me to have a friend, moreover a friend from a hero dynasty. Common bullshit of his, ya'know.

- Yes, I see, but I'm still worried about you! Your scars on your arms .. I .. let me see.. let me try to heal it!

- No need - Touya opposed - I don't have big scars today, I didn't receive any serious injuries. I don't want you to harm yourself just because of these small scratches.

- I don't care.. - the little boy said with a serious gaze in his ruby eyes - besides my mum or Hana-chan, you are the only one for I would use it.. You are the person I like the most, and why should I have this quirk, if not for helping my loved ones?

Now give me your hand...

They boys were at the Todoroki's house, playing inside of Touya's room. But they still could hear the shouting of Endeavour and Rei from the another room.

"Enji, he is just seven! How can you do this to him?

"He is already seven! He is my eldest son, and I want him to become the no 1, no matter what. He will surpass All Might! I won't let my dream down!"

From the room where the boys were in, a quiet sobbing was heard after the argument.

- Tenko chan.. I .. I don't even know if I want to be a hero anymore! - the white haired boy cried silently

- It's okay.. I will always be here for you and support you, no matter what.

- Mum, why Tenko's mum is not answering to your calls?

"Breaking news! The no 1 hero Nana Shimura is dead!"

- Mum! It's... Tenko's grandma on the TV! What happened?

"The heroine kept her private life in secret, but unfortunately the tragedy happened there as well. His son's entire family was eliminated, the circumstances are still under an investigation, the suspect is unknown."

- Mum? Dad? - the white haired boy almost cried - Whats the report about? Why we can't reach Tenko? Is he safe?

His mum couldn't answer. All he got is his father's uncertain hug, with a sad gaze and his trying to calm him down.

- I'm sorry, son...

He was so young back then, but then he was able to feel some happiness. He had one fucking friend in this cursed life, yet he had to die.

He didn't remember to much from his childhood - he didn't want to - but the small black haired boy with those ruby eyes was his sweetest memory ever.

He is not the one he used to be. The white haired hero-to-be is now gone, the world thinks he is dead now. And maybe they know right .. Touya Todoroki is truly dead.

Dabi is the one who lives. Dabi, the villain, the bad guy, who kills people just for fun, and kills heroes to calm his broken soul a little bit.

What would Tenko think if he could see me now?"

But there is no Tenko anymore.

There is no one who would heal his injuries, who would make him smile, who would care for him.. there is no one in this world for him. He is alone.

The only thing what makes him happy is to kill those fucking heroes.

Those scumbags who never helped anyone for real, they weren't there for him when his father almost killed him, neither for Tenko when he... passed away. Somehow.

It has been so many years yet no one knows how this case happened. The investigators claimed it had something to do with All for One and Nana's war, and via that, they didnt really look into it.

Dabi wanted two things in his life.

Firstly , he wanted to kill the person who made him and his whole family suffer - his scumbag of a father.

Secondly, he wanted to find out the truth about Tenko's death.

And that's why he is exactly there where he is right now.

He joined the League of Villains.

He heard from some underground fellas that there is a guy named Giran who can find literally anything. Well, the information is the most expensive trading stuff of his, so Dabi knew he has to make some money first.

And what's a better option than making money from killing heroes? And besides that, if he ""sells" himself to Giran first, and the League would be pleased with him as a villain, than the man would owe him.. perfect plan.

Well, it somehow worked. He was in, the LoV took him and even they gave him the opportunity to make them proud.

Even the boss seemed to acknowledge his powers and determination.

Well, the boss.. he was really something. Dabi - nor the others - couldn't see his face,he had always covered it with a human hand. It was kinda creepy but the whole guy was, as well.

He learned that his quirk, the decay is extremely dangerous and that he didn't think a lot about killing. If someone pisses him off, he is willing to turn them to dust within a sec. He has to be cautious, Dabi noted himself.

Shigaraki didn't seem to care too much about his subordinates but in fact, he did. He couldn't even explain it for himself, he just didn't want them to die - maybe.

He didn't exactly know how to "care". He didn't interact with people too much before establishing the LoV. He had Sensei and Kurogiri, and sometimes he was in touch with Giran if he needed something from the black market.

But then Sensei wanted him to get some people, who are his "own". So that way, it was not necessary to ask Giran for some ragtag mobs if he wanted to make a bigger action.

Now, he had some really hardcore fellas, with real power and willingness. He was satisfied.

He was the leader. They listened to him, they obeyed him. That was the most important thing.

But ... since they lived together, he saw the connections between the members. How they get on with each other in their free time. How they talked, played, had fun, etc.

And for Tomura, it was all strange indeed. He has never done it - at least, not after Sensei found him.

Before -

"Hm, that's not relevant anymore, what happened before..."

Dabi was in a good mood recently. No one from the League knew the reason, but the scarred man teased them less than usual. He was even nice with them sometimes.

They were all in the bar, even Shigaraki sat there and drank some spirit when Toga just asked Dabi randomly about his sudden emotional changes.

- Well, if you really wanna know - the burnt man started to speak theatrically - I will finally receive the thing I always wanted to!

- And what's that thing? - Magne asked excitedly- you ordered some goth stuff from Wish?

- Lol nope, that's ..wait, why do you assume I have my stuff from Wish? I definitely don't! But that's not the matter! After the last mission I finally had the cash to buy something from Giran. And he promised me the stuff for todaay!

- What the hell did you buy from that crock? Do you need some guns or what? - finally Shigaraki spoke up too.

He wasn't fond of the fact that he has now some company but he was aware he needed to socialise.

He quite liked the League and that's why he didn't want them to think that he is some creepy loner - well, he is.

- What for? I have my own firepower, it's not the thing. I bought some information...

That was all he shared with the League. At least, for now. He have to see Girans files at first and maybe after he will reveal the truth about himself - and Tenko in front of the League.

When he almost died, and that way he became Dabi, he promised himself he won't share his past with anyone, but since he lived with the League, he wasn't that determined anymore. He felt like there is a bond between them, and if they could help him find Tenko.. it would be worthy.

Even if he - somewhere deep down - realised it is nearly impossible to find his soulmate being alive, the hope never left him.

Neither when Giran gave him the files - with a sorrowful storyline, about AFO's and Nana's fights, about how Nana tried to hide Kotaro's existence, and then after a time skip, there was Kotaro's own family. Birth dates, basics infos, some pictures and the date of their deaths.

So that was it. No trace of life, no chance of survival. The destruction may caused by Afo.

Who is currently in the jail, so Dabi can't even speak to him.

He knew he has to give up on his hopes. There is the fucking evidence his soulmate really died back then.

Dabi just put the files on his drawer, not really paying any attention to hide it. He will do it later - now, he just doesn't want to think about it.

That's why he volunteered for the Leagues next mission.

It was a dangerous one, he needed to a sneak in the Hero commission's building and steal their newest "top-secret" plans.

It was actually spying, and they needed to do it with the minimum amount of men.

Kurogiri would teleport him in and out when it's time, but it is still risky.

Mostly - for a spying- there was Toga or Twice because of their quirks were suitable enough, but now it was required a real fight as well. So the final version was him and Twice. Twice would copy the looks of a random official, and Dabi will hide and somehow steal the secret files.

Shigaraki was really good at making plans. He always calculated a lot of possibilities in, and nearly all the stuff what could happen.

He was aware the mission is not a child's play but a serious one.

He looked over it many times already before presenting it to the others, but the overthinking and insecurity were his habits and can't let him stay calm.

At the evening, he decided to talk with Dabi about it. He wanted to be sure that the flame villain is okay with the whole thing, he knows the details and stuff.

He headed to his subordinate's room. The door was halfway open so the young boss don't really mind to knock on it.

There was a semidarkness in the room, but Dabi was nowhere to seen. Shigaraki came from the bar, the burnt villain was not there either.

Tomura thought he may use the bathroom or whatever, so he decided to wait him in his room.

He was about to sit on his bed, when he accidentally noticed a file on his drawer.

On the top of the file, there was a picture. That particular picture, of his dad and Nana Shimura.

Tomura stood there for minutes like an ice statue. He couldn't imagine how the picture could remain - and mostly how it got into Dabi's room.

At the meantime Dabi finished his stuff in the bathroom or wherever he was, so he came back to his room, only to see his boss holding a picture from his file and staring on that somehow inscrutably.

If it wasn't for Tomura, Dabi would be pissed off, cuz he doesn't like at all when others just come in his room and start to rummage his stuff, but since the blue haired man was his boss, he tried to keep it cool.

- Hi boss, how can I help you?

Tomura turned up when he heard Dabi's voice. He still held the picture, and judging by the mess on the drawer he also took a look into the files.

He was so confused right now he had no clue what to say. His thoughts were so loud and they didn't subside. He wanted to ask Dabi why the hell he has this goddamn file with the picture, how did he get it, and mostly.. could is be possible that he knows his secret?

"No way" - Tomura thought - "he would hide this somewhere and he wouldn't act so normally with him" But he was certain he needs to figure it out.

However his thoughts were still so messy he couldn't ask the proper questions he wanted to - without being suspicious.

He somewhat calmed down when he read those files - and they all stated he.. not he, Tenko - is dead, all the family is dead. No sign of survival.

So Dabi - or the one who gave him this - cannot know about him.

- How did you get those? - he finally managed to ask. His eyes were more deadly than he wanted tho.

Dabi suddenly felt himself quite uncomfortable. What should he say? If his boss would be curious, how should he explain why he wanted these datas? And why is his boss'es suddenly so resentful?

- This is the stuff I bought from Giran - he started to explain - I needed it for.. personal stuff.

Tomuras eyes widened - what kind of personal stuff of his can he related to his family? He noticed how Dabi's mood changed before he met with Giran - he was almost happy and really excited. But after the meeting he got gloomier than usual. Even now - when he spoke up, his voice was somehow sad.

Tomura decided to not deal with this right now, they all need to focus for the next day's mission.

- Anyways - the bluenette said - I just wanted to say not to fuck it up tomorrow. That's all for now. And I will keep this picture. Good night!

And with that, Shigaraki quickly left his subordinates room.

Now Dabi was the more confused one. He just couldn't understand what exactly his boss wanted to do, and why he got so distracted by that fucking picture. And mostly, why did he keep it?

Not if Dabi would need it, there wasn't Tenko on the picture just his dad as a kid with Nana Shimura.

"Maybe Shigaraki recognised the heroine and that's why he was asking? Probably" - Dabi thought. He knew about All for One and the Shimuras were enemies, so maybe that's why Shigaraki acted so strange.

(Part two right here on my page, just couldn’t write here the whole stuff cuz it’s long)

#bnha #tomura shigaraki #bnha fanfiction #Dabi #dabi is touya #shigaraki x dabi #shigadabi #tenko shimura #touya todoroki #league of villains #my hero academia #nana shimura #shigadabi fluff

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crushzone · 4 years ago

Note

Nin! I’ve been seeing this around recently, but I would love to see you ship your moots if it is ok! ♥️

Hahaha hey there, sure thing! It’s so difficult to be bias free because I know my moots’ crushes, but I shall do my best! I’ll mostly likely pair you guys with someone outside of your crush, just to introduce some new potential partner to your life ;). If I had left anyone out by accident, I am SO sorry!!

✨ Shipping my Moots ✨

@scorpiosanssexy

Sugawara Koshi - Lil sis, I am so sorry it is not Kei. I think Suga is absolutely hilarious and a sweetheart, I’m sure he loves it when you roast him here and there because he’d do the same right back at you. He’s also such a sassy man, so if sassiness is something you enjoy (*cough* like Kei’s, except he’s not a meanie 😠), he’s got it! If you do not know how to cook, neither does he, but you will get to suffer together. He’s also a teacher (which I know is also your thing), so let’s pretend he had to read so many books that he has to eventually get glasses! Will 100% dance real silly with you when you’re both tipsy, but please try to calm him down when he keeps getting ID’ed whenever he tries to buy booze, he’s got that forever cute baby face.

Look, I photoshopped him in glasses for u. ☝🏼

@ceo-of-daichi

Takeru Nakashima - Tbh, it was really difficult not to go with Daichi for this one. I know Takeru may not suit your appearance preferences, but I think you guys would be a very adorable pair! He is very family oriented, had grown up with a bunch of siblings, is a team captain (i know u like captains 😉), and seems like a sweet guy in general. So he will 100% be a fun pal to joke around with, but he’s also really responsible and will take care of u on your night outs. I can see you with his little family cheer squad, they are all just in love with you and consider you a part of their family. 10/10 husband material with that A+ domestic lifestyle.

@honey-makki

Saeko Tanaka - I shall pair you, my queen, with my other queen, Saeko. 👑 Together, you are unstoppable, and just the sight of you both hanging out together would make me run away because I tend to do that whenever I am near anyone attractive. Imagine Saeko picking you up on her motorbike just to go grab some dinner downtown together. All the jokes you’d share, how loudly you would laugh with each other, regardless if whether you are in a public or private place!! She’d probably help you proof read your fics and brainstorm any spicy scenarios with you too! Bet she loveees having you lay on her chest as she strokes your hair, alternatively, she also loves being your big spoon. 🥺

@heauxzenji

Kuroo Tetsuro - My other queen, I shall offer you my nerdy king, Kuroo. 👑 Idk man, appearance-wise alone, I already think you’d both be such a beautiful pair. You two are definitely the type of couples on Tik Tok (or whichever apps people use now a days LOL 👵🏻) with a bunch of “relationship goals” in the comments. He’d be a lot of fun to joke around with, will take great care of you, loves to smack your booty (respectfully) because he knows you are absolutely beautiful, and will call you the cutest nicknames. He also secretly reads your spicy fics without telling you, and will maybe try out a new thing or two from it the next time u guys baaaaang. 💥Spiciness aside, he cherishes all your quiet moments, just sitting next to each other as you sip on some tea, your books in hand as you lean shoulder to shoulder against one another.

@tedwardos

Azumane Asahi - idk, I think you both would be incredibly adorable! He is basically kind of like Yams but with a whee bit more softness. He absolutely loves to cuddle, play video games with you (but please go easy on him, he’s a little scared of certain games), and learn new things (e.g. playing DnD for the first time). Tbh, I think he would be great at DnD because he enjoys the imagination and character design aspect, bet his characters are always the best dressed one. Will help style your hair, cook you breakfast, give you shoulder massages, and just spoiling you in general, as long as you hold him close and tell him you love him every now and then to keep him well assured. You’ll never get cold during winter, he’s basically a human furnace who always make sure your feet are covered by the blanket when you cuddle on the couch.

@nonexistent-social-life-mainacct

Akaashi Keiji - I genuinely think this would be a wonderful match. Firstly, he is a wonderful listener, so he’s there for you to come home to after a tough day at work. If it is not something he can actually help you with, he will do his best to cheer you back up after you had gotten everything off your chest. Secondly, look at this 👇🏼

Girl, he will PROTECT you from all those mysterious bruises that tend to appear on your legs haha. Lastly, I know that when he loves someone, he will do all these adorably thoughtful things for you: like massaging your feet, leaving you cute post-it notes before he leaves for work and buying you flowers randomly. I just, I just want the best for u and I KNOW Akaashi will not disappoint at all.

@mer92

Tadashi Yamaguchi - ok hear me out! Baby boy had been crushing on you from a distance for the longest time, he just absolutely admires how you are so hardworking and passionate towards your dream job. He sees how much you care for your friends and he’d always wished he could be a part of your group too. Eventually, when you are both together, he is a wonderful listener, will go out of his ways to spoil you just to see you smile again. He will give you shoulder massages when you are being too tense, and if anyone gets in the way of achieving your goals, he will step up and defend you. Will also buy extra onigiris from Onigiri Miya and bring them to u for lunch, just to make sure that you don’t accidentally skip any meals because you’re too laser focused on your studies! Speaking of studying, he loves studying with you, and is actually a wonderful work buddy. (Always sneaks a glance at your adorable concentrated face)

@danibby

Kotaro Bokuto - Bokuto ADORES you with all his heart omg. When he catches you dancing or choreographing, he will straight up sway or beg you to teach him some moves, before proceeding to absolutely crush it. If he sees you trying out or applying some makeup/skincare products, he will ask you if he could watch or play with it too. Basically, he loves you so much, he just wants to understand and be a part of what you are doing, while he’ll also do the same where he’d teach you the little things he loves to do (will probably try to get you to play volleyball with him ahah). Is fantastic at cheering you up when you are not feeling too good about yourself, and will tickle fight you until you smile for him. Speaking of tickle fights, initiate it at your risk, because he is hella strong, he’ll pin you down or pick you up really easily to his advantage. BIGGEST HYPE MAN, you can walk out, wearing a trash bag and he would still be 😻😻😻.

@shhhlikeme

Aran Ojiro - I know I’m not being too original with this pairing because you actually crush on him to begin with, but you two are just perfect for each other tbh (was going to pick Toshi at first, but thought Aran would be a better fit)! Firstly, you are both absolutely S T U N N I N G ✨, I would be SO intimidated to come anywhere near this power couple. Secondly, you’re both so diligent, kind, and smart, everyone looks up to the two of you, wishing they could be you (Keep wishing, peeps 💅��) . Lastly, he seems like an absolute sweetheart, loveeeeees to spoil you with random hugs, kisses, and gifts, and will joke around with you a lot. He’ll find any way he could show you off to his friends, and they’d all be so jealous. It is nice to know that you can always lean on him if you ever have to, and he knows he could do the same with you. Bet your family absolutely LOVES him too, 100% the kind of guy you would want to bring home.

@bjbex

Yu Nishinoya - Noya is IN LOVE with you, he thinks you are freaking beautiful, is a hottie, and basically his queen. He’d keep crushing on you until you finally give him a chance. When you are together, he’d do anything to please you, ultimately, he just wants to see you smile and happy all the time. He’ll crack some jokes and be a little goof just to cheer you up! Also wants you to freaking DOMINATE him hahahah, trusts you completely, please do as you would like, he’s all yours. Loves getting his lil booty smacked and pegged, but is also always down to pleasure you. Just grab him by his hair (loves getting his hair pulled) and put him in any position you want him.

Will pull some “accident” like this often, so please prepare yourself. Will travel the world with you and take a ton of photos, then proceed to set photos of you as his wallpaper/lock screen on every device.☝🏼

@dymphnasprose

Tendou Satori - Tendou ADORES YOU, for real, he freaking ADORES you (But I adore you more, so he can back down 🤚). He loves to be your little spoon (will literary purr if you give him head rubs), boasts about you to his friends all the time (especially to Toshi), likes to endearingly tease you a lot, and will cook you some nice food all the time (he probably went to culinary school, after all, to become a chocolatier). The first thing he does when he gets back home from work? Hunt you down and immediately cling on to you as he pepper kisses all over your face with that oWo face, if ya know what I mean. Also LOVES to get freaky, this man is flexible, he just loves being intimate with ya, so tell him what you want to do and he will most likely be down to at least give it a shot. ;) Also loves to randomly buy you some cute clothes or jewelry you had been eyeing, he doesn’t do it often, but he’ll spoil you with it here and there when he can. Loves to sing random songs for you, “Dymph-nuhhh, Dymph-nuhhh, my darlin, Dymph-nuhhh~~”

@pleasantanathema

Akiteru Tsukishima - Let me start off by saying that I am absolutely in love with Akiteru, and because I love him so much, I shall pair him with you! Lauren, I am in love with you from the very first moment you’ve hit me up, I feel like our vibes match and because I feel the same way with Akiteru, I believe he would really vibe with you too! He’s an absolute sweetheart who will go out of his ways just to make you happy, you’d both spend hours chit chatting about the most random things, just giggling constantly, and before you know it, it’s already really late at night. He LOVES taking photos of you, and his phone is filled with photos of the two of you. Kei doesn’t really care much about you, but Akiteru will keep bringing you up in conversations with him anyway because he’s just extremely grateful to have you in his life.

@afictionalwhore

Ittetsu Takeda - Listen, as much as I believe Keishin is the perfect man for us you, Takeda is another husband material, adorable man who would also be just as perfect.

LOOK AT HIM REALIZING THAT HE IS IN LOVE WITH U. Also Keishin looking like a snacc right next to him, but this post is not about him mmkay?

Takeda is so weak for you, he’ll spoil you rotten where he can, and his affection bank is unlimited, will constantly remind you that he loves you. He’s also really shy, so sometimes, he’ll try to be “sexy” and initiate something, only to stutter and blush terribly when he attempts to execute it, so please be kind HAHA (I think find that really endearing tbh). Fully understands how tiring it can be to work with children, he is also a teacher after all, so at the end of each day, you’ll both take warm baths together, cuddling as you laugh about all the silly things your kids had done today. Sometimes he will help substitute for you too, if you ever need to take a day off.

I’m very proud of this list, ngl, I stand by my ships 😉

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koeyohte · 4 years ago

Text

It’s bright in the hallway. Sunlight streams in from the expansive glass doors and windows just a few steps away in the atrium. The campus has received many remodels in the past few years and I’m fortunate to be taking two of my semester’s classes in this airy building.

I’ve never been good with school. Other students could casually discuss what they’d learned or cram their study session in the night before an exam and do just fine. I’ve always needed extra help - after hours work from the teachers, tutors, extravagant memory solutions. I’d finished high school last year and now was waiting, alone, outside a closed wood door where my english literature class would take place; not for a while though, I think, glancing down at my phone. I’m always early to class. For now, I’m sitting on the floor, plucking at stray fibers of material from my jean shorts and wondering if wearing leggings would have been a better idea. The tile is a cold shock to my skin whenever I touch it.

I’ve been taking this class for three weeks now - two days in each of those weeks on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I look hopefully down the hallway, toward the atrium. There’s usually a quiet young man who arrives early and waits across from me. He keeps to himself and is always reading something. I think he’s nice to look at, though I would never admit it out loud. He’s a bit unusual looking - angular features compliment a frame that’s thin and wiry, but with broad shoulders that make him appear larger than he likely really is. His hair falls just past his shoulders, which is unusual around here. I’ve never seen a man around my age with long hair. When I’m sitting on the floor, he seems rather tall, but when I’m standing, he’s actually about the same height as me. I don’t know anything about him but it’s nice to share the otherwise lonely wait in the hallway with him. I feel like there’s something calm and even comforting about him, though I’m not really sure why.

Twice, I’ve switched up what side of the hall I stand on, just to see what he’ll do. He stood farther away during the first week but after I accidentally dropped my notes and he picked them up for me in the second week, he’s been standing a little closer, still always across from me. I remember noticing a narrow but long scar across his wrist when he handed me my notepad. His hands were rather rough when they brushed mine. He hardly met my eyes and was quick to move away again, like he was uncomfortable with being near me. The dark circles under his eyes were much more apparent up close.

I look up when I hear the doors of the atrium open and my heart skips a beat.

He’s buried in his phone just like he has been every day before. He makes his way down the hall, barely looking up even once, and comes to lean against the wall opposite me like he always does. He looks past his phone to nod at me, which I wasn’t expecting. I try to smile at him but it comes out like more of a grimace. He doesn’t seem offended and brushes his long hair from his face while he continues to read. His hair is a strange, dark blond color and it frames his sharp features in a way that makes it difficult for me to look away. He doesn’t seem to attract much attention from anyone else but I realize as I stare at him that I find him oddly handsome.

I guess that explains why I’ve randomly thought about him more than a few times this past week. That’s new for me.

Confused by my revelation, I look away before he can notice. I don’t even know his name. There’s a subtle smoky scent that I now recognize is coming from his bag. It’s sweet and herbal rather than stale and dusty. His clothes are the same as always - a button down, earth-toned shirt with dark grey slacks. He looks like he should be working in an office.

He doesn’t say much and he won’t speak unless spoken to. I’m not sure if that’s just how he is, or if it’s a manners thing, or if he actually despises small talk. He seems too buried in deep thought for it, from my observations. He’s always reading something, whether a book in his hand or something on his phone. I can tell they’re not text messages by the way he brings the phone up and stares at it while occasionally scrolling for the entire 20 minutes we usually stand in the hallway.

It’s surprising and a bit bewildering to admit that I like looking at him, but it’s true. That being said, I find just about everyone nice to look at in some way. It’s confusing sometimes. I’ve never felt anything more for anyone, though, despite being pursued more than once. It just hasn’t happened yet I guess. I’m in no rush, so it’s alright with me. Unintentional flings don’t seem enjoyable and I can’t imagine being so intimate and open with someone who doesn’t plan to be there in the future. Unlike Sun, I think to myself - she’s been with lots of people, and while some of them still spend time with her just as friends, others have left a bad taste in my mouth. She’s easily forgiven them. Or forgotten. Maybe both.

Someone else walks between us and when I glance up, I’m surprised when the man across the hall looks quickly away from me. I watch him for a moment, wondering how long he was staring. Maybe he wasn’t. Instead of looking back at me, he scratches at his chin and tucks his phone away, looking at something over my head. I find myself glancing upwards, assuming there’s a flyer I must have missed, but there’s nothing there. When I look back at him, he’s watching me again, but he startles.

“Sorry,” he mutters and looks away. He sticks his hands into his pockets and avoids my gaze. I’m not sure what to say. That it’s okay? That sounds weird, possibly even creepy. Should I ask him if something’s amiss? That might be weirder.

He’s looking at me again and this time, he doesn’t shy away from my own gaze. His light eyes trail down to my knee, where I realize he’s eyeing a small cut from where I had banged it on one of Sun’s short coffee tables last week. He looks like he wants to speak but he’s holding himself back.

“Ran into a table,” I say awkwardly, gesturing at the wound. It’s just a small red line now. The man looks back to my eyes and nods.

“Looks recent,” he says after a moment. His voice is mellow and lighter than I expected it to be. He sits in the first row, close to me in our class, yet I’ve rarely heard him speak; certainly not more than a simple yes or no. “Not from this week, though.”

I tilt my head at him, surprised he can tell. “How’d you know?”

Something passes across his face. He looks almost disappointed - or angry? “I’ve seen a lot of… cuts,” he mutters. He shakes his head but falls silent again. His expression is mellow as he stares at the tiles between us. Relaxed, he’s very nice to look at.

I feel myself start when he blinks up at me again. I’m wracking my mind for something to say. There’s a palpable tension in the air - either that, or I’m just incredibly nervous, for some reason.

“What happened to your wrist?” I blurt, glancing at the pale pink line that reaches over his skin. He pushes his hand further into his pocket and I fear I’ve crossed some invisible boundary with him.

“Nothing,” he responds quietly, voice hardly more than a whisper. His posture is stiff now and he’s avoiding my gaze, so I don’t press him.

“What do you do?” I ask, hoping a change in subject will make him feel more at ease.

“Metal shop,” he mutters simply. He’s still not looking at me. Deciding he’s done with the conversation, I just nod and go back to my phone. Sun’s sent me a picture of some plants she wants to buy for her patio.

“What about you?” he asks after a moment. I’m glad that he’s not giving up so soon. He still looks upset, or frustrated, but his posture’s relaxed a bit.

“Just… this right now. I’ve been around.” I pause, realizing how that sounds. “I mean - I’ve had a few odd jobs. Nothing serious. Coffee shops, library, things like that.”

At mention of the library, the man perks up. “What did you do there?”

“Just inventory, organizing shelves, scheduling shipments from one branch to another.” I watch his features change, almost dramatically, from brooding and gloomy to fascination.

“I assume that means you like to read?” he asks, standing up straighter. He takes his hands from his pockets and folds them. He crosses one leg over the other and suddenly appears much more comfortable than he ever has in the hallway. The newfound engagement on his face makes him much nicer to look at.

“I do,” I begin, but before he can ask me what most everyone does, I hurry on, “but mostly nonfiction. I had to focus on school for so long, I hardly had time to read for fun reading. I’m just now getting into it again.”

To my surprise, he nods as if he understands. Most people find what I’ve said to be ridiculous, or a poor excuse to avoid reading as a hobby.

“I’m like that sometimes, too,” he says. “I’m always reading something, though reading purely for enjoyment is something I only very rarely get to do. I’m….” He tilts his head to the side and sighs as though he’s about to tell me something ludicrous. “I’m in the midst of a collection of European cavalry history, right now.”

I nod, unsure of what to say. It doesn’t sound particularly appealing to me, but I can understand the draw for someone who knows more already than I do. I try to smile in place of empty words, and the man drops his gaze to the floor again.

I notice a tear in the belt loop of my shorts and start to pull at it. They’re one of my favorites, as they actually fit. I have exceptionally wide hips, so everything is either too tight in the thighs or too loose everywhere else. I grumble when the string gets caught on my ring. I wear a thin silver band around my ring finger on my left hand - I grew tired of people trying to hit me up. Free from the devious string, I glance down the hall, but first I steal a glance at my classmate.

I nearly startle when I notice his eyes are resting on me again. It looks like he meant to just glance at me but upon noticing my staring, now he is too, in an effort to hide his intention. Whatever it was.

My heart is pounding in my ears. I can feel my pulse in my chest.

“Jeans,” I say weakly, shrugging at the string in my hand. The young man nods once. I see him swallow and lower his phone from his face.

“I had a sister who wore a lot of them,” he says slowly, as though he’s considering each word before he speaks.

I notice how he chose his words - “had” a sister. I offer him a polite smile.

“I’ve never had a sister.”

“Brothers?” the man asks. I shake my head. He shrugs. “More resources for yourself.”

I open my mouth to respond, then realize that nothing natural comes to mind. What an odd thing to say.

“I suppose,” I finally say. He had started to look at his phone again but when I speak, he pauses.

“You suppose?”

I look away. There’s an edge to his tone that wasn’t there previously. He seems frustrated with my comment. His brows lower and the creases along his mouth deepen. Whatever attraction I did feel toward him fades slightly. The man straightens himself up and tucks his phone into his pocket.

“You don’t get anything to yourself with six siblings,” he elaborates. A subtle, tired smile flashes across his face at my expression of surprise. “That’s all I meant.”

Realizing that he noticed my disenchantment with his tone, I begin to feel guilty.

“It’s alright,” I manage, hoping he’ll forgive my reaction. I’ve always been sensitive to people’s behavior. I assume it has something to do with a handful of particular years during my childhood. My mother went through something that I was too young to understand, but I didn’t miss the things she did and said to me before she found herself again. I’m quick to assume the worst from people rather often. It’s something Sun likes to remind me about, if she isn’t criticizing my willingness to help people.

“Seven of you?” I ask, realizing the man is still watching me.

He nods. “We’re fosters… so, none of us are really related. Different ages, come from different places….” He looks suddenly uncomfortable and trails off, looking away. He sticks his hands back into his pockets, shoulders slumping. He looks like he wishes he hadn’t told me.

“That must be difficult. I can’t imagine that.”

“Hmm.” The young man looks back to me. “It can be.”

A few other classmates are starting to arrive. I’m disappointed that we don’t get the hall to ourselves anymore. The man pulls his phone back out and resumes his reading like I’m not there at all. I get the distinct impression that his foster family is something he doesn’t speak about much and probably didn’t mean to offer to me.

The rest of the wait goes by as usual. Relative silence in the hall is replaced by shuffling shoes, the rustling of paper, the clamoring of heavy books against tile, and chatter.

The door to the classroom opens, the last of the previous class files out, and the professor beckons us inside. I take my place in the front row, all the way over to the right, where I’ve made a corner against the far wall. The man follows and sits two seats away like he always does. The professor does all the talking, until discussion time. My quiet companion and I aren’t exactly fans of speaking to the class. The professor hasn’t called on us yet and she doesn’t this week, either.

Once dismissed, I gather my things and wait patiently for the young man to take his so I can leave. He’s shuffling papers in his bag and muttering to himself. He looks upset, so I pretend to read a message, but am glad to see one from Sun to respond to anyway. She’s got some exciting news about a new girlfriend, it seems. I begin to type a reply but the man groans and moves aside, pinning himself uncomfortably against the table.

“Sorry, I’m sorry. Go ahead.” He waits for me to pass him and I notice how he recoils further as I do, as if being near another person disgusts him. His knuckles are white against the table and he’s turned his head away from me like he’s afraid I’ll look too closely. I try not to think too much about it, hoping it’s not personal to me. I pause just after him when I notice the way he paws frantically through his things.

“You okay?” I ask, lowering my phone. He looks up.

“Yes. I just… lost something.”

“Can I help?” I start to move closer but he quickly straightens up, picks up the bag and sighs heavily.

“No. Thank you.” Clearly frustrated, he strides past me toward the classroom door. I’m surprised when he holds it open and looks expectantly at me. I thank him and sweep out into the hall.

“You sure you’re okay?” I ask again when he trudges past me. He frowns.

“I’m fine.”

“Okay.” He doesn’t seem fine. He seems to be silently fuming. His brows are low and the creases in his face are deep. I remind myself that I don’t know him and it’s best to leave him be. Despite the way my feelings get carried away so easily, I have to remind myself that they shouldn’t choose my decisions for me. It’s very difficult, especially when I see someone upset or in need. Sun likes to tease me about it, telling me I’ll spread myself thin trying to provide more attention to everyone I’ll ever meet than I ever do for myself.

Some days, I think she’s right.

I leave my disgruntled classmate behind and go to stand outside, waiting for my mother to pull the car up. We share the vehicle, so she dropped me off today. She had work for a few hours while I was on campus and doesn’t always get off on time. I could be waiting here awhile.

I look up when someone comes to stand next to me. It’s my classmate, and he’s fidgeting like he’s distressed or like something is wrong. His hands are flexing like he’s in pain and he’s gritting his jaw. I don’t ask him this time if he’s okay. He’s staring straight ahead as if I’m not there.

“You getting picked up?” he asks suddenly. I nod and ask him the same. He barely hides a scoff. “Ah - no. They would never… no. I just....” He frowns and looks down. “Nevermind.”

“Wait.” I follow him as he steps back toward the building. He looks strangely on edge, like a frightened, injured animal. I feel myself hiding an eye roll at the way he stares at me like I’ve caused him further upset. “Don’t worry, I won’t ask if you’re alright - but... do you need anything?”

He looks offended until he realizes why. “I’m sorry,” he begins, turning around to face me again. His voice is thin and suddenly soft. There’s something gentle in the way he speaks to me now. “I didn’t mean to be rude. It’s not… socializing isn’t my strong suit.” He looks sheepishly away again, hand anxiously rubbing at the strap of his backpack. I can see how worn it is there. “You don’t… have a lighter, do you?”

That’s what the herbal smell was.

“Sorry, no.” I don’t have anything against smoking, but I’ve never done it myself. Sun does, sometimes. I’ve sat in her room in the cloudy, sweet haze while her company languished around, discussing things they weren’t ever quite relaxed enough to allow themselves the luxury of doing before. It’s a great time it seems, but I won’t try it with so many strangers around. I trust Sun with my life, but she has a lot of strangers in her room sometimes. Some come and go swiftly and others stay for weeks.

The man casts me a small smile. I hate how charming he looks like that.

“Darn. Hope you won’t think any less of me for it, anyways.”

“What makes you so sure I’m thinking about you at all?”

I’ve spoken before thinking. I feel my face flush bright red. He blinks at me for a moment, then looks away. Neither of us say anything for several breaths. The tension is stifling.

I close my eyes and shake my head at myself.

“That - that was… I didn’t mean it like that.”

The man laughs quietly and I see him reach up to scratch distractedly at the back of his neck, ruffling his hair. He looks shabby but in a confusingly enticing way.

“‘S alright,” he mumbles. I allow myself to look at him for a moment while he’s busy looking anywhere else but at me. His face is lightly shadowed and his sharp features cast sunlight across his forehead and the bridge of his hooked nose. His eyes are light, unlike my own. As I look, I notice pretty, almost yellow centers. I’ve heard of heterochromia but I can’t tell from here if that’s what’s there for sure.

He looks at me again and I notice out of my peripheral vision that my mother’s little blue car is turning into the driveway.

“My mom’s here,” I announce, unsure of how else to proceed. The tension is still there but it’s not as taut. The man looks up and backs away from me as though he shouldn’t be seen so close. He’s chewing his lip but as the car pulls up to a stop, he just looks away from me again.

“See you,” he says, and turns back into the building before I can even respond. I open the passenger door and climb in, not allowing myself to stall, and glad when my mother doesn’t ask any questions.

#modernAU #short story #ch1 #idk what im calling this yet

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extremelyblackandwhite · 5 years ago

Text

the unseen one - 09

Pairing: Hades!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: fluff

A/N: every time i check the notes they have increased and i’m about to collapse with excitement. thank you so so much guys, i hope you enjoy this chapter. feedback is always appreciated. enjoy xx

Next Chapter >>

The book had nothing of importance for James, it mostly spoke about how Persephone was the one to know about the groves, something he already knew. It had been her place of living, mostly where she would to stroll around with her husband, sometimes even more than strolling following some rumours he’d heard from Hecate. Truth was there was nothing he could do, not even Demeter could manage to bring what looked like a waste land into the glory he remembered. Zeus was still kept in the dark of the news, maybe he was god of the universe but James was Hades, God of the Underworld.

Weeks had gone by and he had been stuck between work and trying his best to revive the groves, even planting new plants along with the Hecate and her maidens. He hadn’t seen Y/N in weeks, only speaking with her either through call or text with the pretence he was on a business trip. He missed seeing her, seeing her face but his job was making him stay underground for a while.

Once again, he was in his office running around trying to get stuff done. For someone who didn’t decide a soul’s faith, he sure had a lot of stuff to get done. Hecate and Demeter had taken on the groves so he was trying to fill in some of Hecate’s workload such as leading the souls. He leaned against his chair, glass of ambrosia in his hand while the other pinched the bridge of his nose.

James did not know what to do and whenever he did not know what to do, he always did one thing, go into the artefact room. Gods were no longer allowed to carry artefacts after losing them time after time and Zeus thought there was no better place to hide them than in the land of the death. He found it soothing to look at everything but what he personally enjoyed more was Persephone’s ring. It wasn’t that the ring itself wasn’t something that would give someone eternal life or eternal beauty, it was just a token of love. It always reminded him that no matter how many years he lived, how many things could be removed from you, there was always love somehow.

The ring itself had a story that even him found heart melting, it had been made from the very first rose to grown in the groves. This rose had then been collected and bathed in pure gold thus creating a forever living flower, the same forever living flower Hades had gifted Persephone with when she became Queen of the Underworld. Now, Hades had gifted Persephone with countless jewels which could buy the whole mortal world, but James’ favourite was always the ring. Recently it had even grown more found to him due to the fact that it reminded him of Y/N and the roses she had on her window pane constantly.

- There you are! - Hecate walked into the artefact room, caring little for the fact she was not allowed to walk in. - I thought you’d gone to see your pesky little mortal.

- Excuse me? - he turned his head, colour draining from his face. Did Hecate knew of Y/N?

- I’m the goddess of witchcraft besides you have a sunflower on your desk. You’d either be screwing Demeter or seeing a gifting mortal. - she watched the god of the underworld become speechless for the first time. - Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone you’re seeing a mortal if that’s what you’re worried.

- I know how much you hate mortals but please can you keep that one away from your curses and hexes.

- Who do you think I am? I enjoy sleeping with mortals as much as the next god. Rather glad you’ve started to do it.

- I’m not sleeping with Y/N and can you please stop talking in such a lewd manner about her?

- Oh please, you’re not sleeping yet with her. The only reason gods talk with mortals is if they’re their kids or they want to sleep with them. I don’t blame them, humans don’t randomly turn into animals and they’re really good at the bedroom arts.

- I really don’t think my personal life is of any matter to you or to anyone in the underworld.

- Awe, don’t tell me you’ve grown found of the little mortal? - she crossed her arms, leaning against one of the walls of the room, that little annoying smirk that always made James want to fire her on the spot. Sadly, he did not have the power to kick gods of the underworld out of the underworld. Once he didn’t immediately start to argue about that, her once teasing smirk fell off as she returned to her regular stance. - Hades, you didn’t.

- It’s none of your business, Hecate and I really don’t owe you any explanation of what I do outside the underworld.

- A mortal, are you joking? Should I remind you of the goddesses who want to be in your favour? Like the literal goddess of love and beauty, Hebe, Hedone and you go and court a mortal? Are you just trying to piss off the whole Greek pantheon or are you that stupid?

- Once again, what I do with my life is none of your business.

- I just want you to remember who you are.

- I know who I am and if you knew who I was, you wouldn’t speak to me in such manner. - he pointed at her before walking right by her and out the artefact room. - Good evening, Hecate.

James was beyond annoyed as he left the underworld, not in the mood for more lectures from Hecate. Everything was becoming too much, the groves, the impeding marriage offers. He just couldn’t take it anymore and all he wanted to see was her, all he wanted to hear now was Y/N and her silly laugh. This is why he found himself knocking on her door like a crazy man.

Y/N had been sat in her coach, cashmere blanket wrapped around her as Parks and Recs played on the TV, a nice bowl of sweet and salty popcorn by her side. The sudden knock made her flinch, sending popcorn flying everywhere. She checked the clock, 3 AM. It couldn’t be Anne, she always used the fire escape which was indeed way more scary, but still never the door. She walked slowly to the door, opening the peep hole to see a very familiar face which made her unlock her door.

- Bucky? Are you okay? - what she wanted to ask was what he was doing there at 3 AM but she hadn’t seen him in a few weeks and all she wanted was to see him. He looked tired, as if he hadn’t slept for years.

- I’m sorry I just really need to see you. - he sighed. - I should’ve called.

- It’s alright, Buck. Come in. - she extended her hand to his, linking her pinky with his as she guided him into her living room which now looked like popcorn town. - Sorry for the popcorn on the ground, your knocking startled me.

- I didn’t mean to startle you, doll. I’m sorry. - he tightened his lips as she cleaned an area of the coach, patting it so he could sit. He sat by her side, leaning against her. - Just really needed to see your face.

- What happened? - she combed through his hair, extending the blanket so it could cover him too.

- Everything’s going to shit at work, doll. Sometimes I wish I could just quit, get a car and drive as far away as I could.

- Then quit, why do something that doesn’t make you happy?

- Wish it was that simple. I’m afraid I’m stuck to that job forever.

- Do you want me to make you some tea? It always calms me down.

- No, it’s fine. - he wrapped his arms around her, cuddling against her side. How he wished he could just steal her away, take her with him, make her Queen of the Underworld. - You are the most beautiful thing I have ever set my eyes on.

- Have you not looked at my roses? - she pointed at the beautiful flower display by her window. - Because I think that should earn the “most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen”.

- I don’t think so. - he kissed the side of her head. - You’re so beautiful, I would steal you away if I could.

- Sounds like a Hades complex you’re developing. - she giggled, making Bucky smile.

- If you only knew.

#sebastian stan #bucky barnes #winter soldier #white soldier #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan/reader #bucky x reader #bucky/reader #bucky imagine #bucky barnes imagine #marvel AU #greek god!bucky #bucky AU #sebastian stan AU

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blu-archer · 4 years ago

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Somethings Missing

Part 1 of the Flower shop and Bakery AU

Snz [mild sneeze kink implied?]

No warnings. it’s cute.

Main Pairing: Jimin/Yoongi

Yoongi knew the day was going to be long and tiring as soon as he left Hoseok to man the shop so that he could sneak his morning dose of Jimin - unfortunately only to find that his cheerful, gorgeous boyfriend had been replaced by Jungkook. The taller man had greeted Yoongi with a wide grin, turning even more amused at the sight of the pink carnation that Yoongi had snipped before leaving his store.

“I like you Yoongi, but Jimin has martial arts training and I’m not about to stand in the way of that.” Jungkook teased as he restocked the packaging in the shelves behind him for the baked goods and coffees.

Yoongi gave a light chuckle, leaning on the counter as he watched Jungkook work. “Funny. You’re early today, is Jimin in the back?”

Jungkook shook his head. “Just me today, Jin will probably come by at around 2 but other than that, I’m the only front man for the next day or two.” Upon seeing Yoongi’s face morph into one of confusion, Jungkook added. “Jimin called in sick this morning, it was really last minute so Jin wasn’t able to switch his schedule around enough to get here earlier than he can. I tried calling Jimin to see how he was, but he didn’t answer.” He took a big gulp of his coffee once the last of the packaging cups were in place. “I called Tae next and there is a high chance that Jimin is passed out and dosed up on cold medicine. Which is probably for the best. An upside of him getting sick really easily is that he at least knows how to take care of himself.”

At least Yoongi knew where he was, but that didn’t make him feel any better.

He left Jungkook soon after that and tried to bury himself in work, but everything seemed to be small tasks that didn’t fully occupy his time. He sent a message to Jimin that he had worked on for half an hour, writing and then rewriting before he had just sent a simple text.

Y – ‘Heard you were sick, need me to stop by?’

It was annoying how little focus he had throughout the day because of Jimin’s absence. Hoseok even tried to distract him with random ‘Name this flower’ quizzes that he made up when he was bored, but nothing helped. He spent most of his day dragging around a big new load of bagged fertilizer and doing some low maintenance around the shop. That one flickering bulb was getting on his nerves and he was going to fix it whether it risked shocking him or not.

It was close to 4 o’clock when he finally heard a message come through on his private phone. Yoongi didn’t even try to act cool about how he had scrambled for the device. Thankfully the only other person in the store was Hobi, and he seemed to be invested in restocking some gardening supplies.

~Mochi~-‘Hey, Sorry, I only looked at my phone now… It’s really not bad, I’m mostly sleeping it off. Tae should be home soon so you don’t need to stop by, I wouldn’t want to accidently get you sick too.

Without a seconds’ hesitation Yoongi replied.

Y-‘I wouldn’t mind, I missed you this morning. Jungkook thought I was trying to court him.’

He didn’t get an answer straight away and his presence was dragged away momentarily by the entry of a customer needing help with finding the right assortment of flowers for their spouse. Yoongi spent the next twenty minutes discussing flower meanings, arrangements and building a bouquet for the customer, it felt like an eternity before he got the chance to see the reply. And Jimin had sent a few in succession.

~Mochi~-‘He’s just jealous because no one wants to date him.

~Mochi~-‘You should have seen him sulk that first week when we went to the arcades and art museum.

~Mochi~-‘It’s like the ideal date place for him apparently?

~Mochi~-‘But seriously, stopping by wouldn’t be worth your time. I was awake for maybe 2 hours – max, and it was more of a staring into space situation until I just went to sleep. You’d get bored.

~Mochi~-‘sleep is better than having to deal the mess this cold wants to make of me, anyway.’

Yoongi couldn’t help the small smile as he pictured what Jimin must look like right now, probably bundled up in his bed or the couch trying to fall asleep every second he could.

He had seen Jimin with the after math of colds before and had definitely seen him with allergies – he had learnt the hard way that Jimin and roses didn’t mix well, and there was that one time that Hoseok had brought his sisters kitten to work when she was out of town and he had to care for it. Jimin had fallen in love with it despite having spent the rest of the day sneezing and rubbing at his puffy eyes to the point where Jin had had to send him home.

Yoongi loved seeing Jimin a mess, he loved seeing that his perfect, beautiful boyfriend was human and wasn’t in control of everything. Yoongi loved seeing Jimin unravel, and he had to admit – although he’d probably never say it out loud – even before they had gotten to be good friends Yoongi had found his attraction to Jimin’s prone natural loss of control to be over-powering. He had never thought he would see someone trying to catch their breath shakily from sneezing or to have that pink hue to their cheeks and nose, or anything related to that, attractive. Maybe it was because it was Jimin, but Yoongi could never really stop thinking about it.

Y-‘Can I video call you later? I want to make sure you’re still alive…’

Yoongi sat perched behind his front desk watching his phone, waiting for the next message, wondering if that had been the correct thing to type.

On an upside it was nearing the end of the workday and he couldn’t be gladder. While he hadn’t done anything extremely productive, Yoongi felt drained. He often blamed that on Hoseok. That man had the power to absorb the energy source of his surrounding people, and unfortunately Yoongi was the one that spent the most time with him.

Speaking of... Yoongi hadn’t realised how quiet the store was until he could vaguely hear Hoseok’s loud laughter breaching through the walls. He must have gone next door for something while they had no customers. The younger seemed to be making a habit out of it, recently taking to the exchange of Jimin so that he could have sometime alone with Jungkook. Yoongi had tried to speak about what it was that was transpiring between the two, but Hoseok had merely shrugged him off and teased him about whatever recent thing he’d seen his boss do towards Jimin.

The laughter got louder until Hoseok burst through from the back, shaking his head at whatever had been said to him with a wide smile before handing Yoongi one of the large cups of coffee he was carrying.

“Thought you might need it. It’s getting quite chilly now.” Hoseok mused. “I have a feeling winter is going to hit hard.”

Yoongi thanked him, accepting any form of caffeine with gratefulness. Winter was definitely going to be a harsh one, Yoongi had thought it many times before especially in terms of his business, but a new concern had suddenly arisen. He’d have to look out more for Jimin. Maybe he could send him over some warmer jackets or hats to help keep him warm.

“Did anyone else come?”

“Not really, its’ been quiet.” Yoongi murmured, breathing in the warm steam. “We still have to organise that big delivery order for Friday, but we can do that tomorrow afternoon.”

Hoseok nodded, moving to sit down next to Yoongi behind the counter. “Jin said that we are in for a week or so of storms, so I don’t think we’ll have many clients these next couple of days.”

“Probably pick up a bit after wards..”

“Flowers are a good ‘Get Well Soon’ treat and with the weather we’ve been having I won’t be surprised if our sales increase after this next week.” Hoseok rambled. “Probably more deliveries than walk ins though. Are you going to send something to Jimin?”

Yoongi blinked. Should he? Jimin didn’t seem to want him to come by, but maybe if he just had the flowers delivered it may make him feel a bit better.. Yoongi was broken out of thought by the vibration of his phone, alerting him of an incoming call that Hoseok quickly reached over to hand to the older man despite Yoongi being closer to it.

~ Mochi ~

Hoseok looked away to hide his smile as he watched Yoongi’s expression soften. The elder took a breath before he answered hastily, unsure what the call would mean considering how he had thought Jimin had fallen asleep again.

“Hello?”

“Hey.” Jimin answered roughly, holding the phone away from him as he tried clearing his throat before speaking again, still sounding quite heavily congested and tired. “I’m sorry it’s not a video call but… I look like shit right now. I haven’t showered and Tae has been sending me zombie emojis randomly all day, so this is the best I’m offering.”

Yoongi chuckled lightly, swirling his drink as if contemplating to drink it but making no moves to. ‘I’m sure you look beautiful, but if this is what you want then we can do this instead. You sound really hoarse, is it your throat that’s bothering you?”

“Throat. Head. Sinuses. Chest. The whole lot.” Jimin broke off to muffle a cough, sniffling miserably before he continued. “It kind of progressed rather quickly through the day, I seem to wake up with a new symptom every time I lie down. At least Tae is at the pharmacy now, so I should be getting something stronger in my system soon.”

“Take as many days as you need.” Yoongi advised softly. “This weather’s only getting worse, and if you have to come into work get Taehyung to drive you. Or call me, I’ll come fetch you.”

Jimin hummed and Yoongi bit his lip as he heard the small sniffles through the line that Jimin was no doubt trying to manage quietly. He didn’t remember Jimin showing any signs of being unwell the day before but from the sounds of it, this cold of his has burrowed in fast and deep. While Yoongi hoped that Jimin felt better in the next few days for his sake, he had a feeling that Jimin wasn’t going to kick it like everyone was planning for.

“And you need to dress warmly too.” Yoongi added, he could hear shuffling on Jimin’s side and another hum of agreement. Yoongi sipped his coffee, letting the caffeine he craved ease through him. “I can drop off-“

“Huh’imphshiew… Hih – Hih’inxgtsh’uh – Eh’INGXtshew! Sor-sorry, snf. Hih’ehNXgtshh!”

“Bless you..” Yoongi said, feeling his cheeks warm a bit at the interruption. Hoseok didn’t seem to be paying him any attention, so he allowed himself to flush lightly as he listened to Jimin succumb to another double- this time a bit further away from the receiver, hearing the desperate thicker sniffles that he could no longer try to hide. “I was saying that I could drop off some warmer winter Jackets, but it really does seem like I was a bit too late to suggest it.”

Jimin tried to give a light laugh but his effort was lacking. Instead he excused himself for a moment and after a few seconds of loud tossing he could distantly hear Jimin blowing his nose.

“Sorry.” Jimin sniffled as he returned. “I left the tissues in the kitchen, just… Snf… Hih’iiTSHhew.. snf snf. Damnit!”

“Bless.” Yoongi’s brows pinched with concern at how thick Jimin’s speech had become. “I wish I could help you.. I know this might make you sneeze more but maybe you should take a shower, or a bath, let yourself soak and breathe in that hot steam.”

Jimin moaned lowly and Yoongi took a big scolding gulp of his coffee.

“I’m sorry, I’m not sure how long I’m going to last here. I wanted to call now rather than later since I was awake, but this is just getting embarrassing. Snf.”

“This isn’t something to be embarrassed over... Now the time you and Jungkook decided to wear matching bunny onesies for Easter… That you should be embarrassed about.” Yoongi teased and Hoseok tried to stifle his laughter as he glanced warmly at his boss, as if thanking him for reminding him of that fashion catastrophe.

“Hey!” The pout could be heard in Jimin’s tone. “Jin made us wear those, and even if I thought I was going to die of heat I made that outfit look cute.”

Yoongi hummed with amusement.

“I did.”

“Of course.” Yoongi agreed playfully. “I’m sure you had a line of suitors handing out their numbers for you.”

“Well, I got you.” Jimin said, coughing briefly away from the receiver.

Yoongi smiled. He had a point there. “Fair enough, glad I was the one to be chosen. It must have been a very difficult choice to sift through the offers.”

“You seem to make all of my choices easier.” Jimin replied softly, then made a disgruntled sound as if rethinking his words. “Forget I said that. This cold is making me loopy.”

Hoseok made a move to switch the open sign to close and gestured to Yoongi that he would start the cash up for the day seeing as they were unlikely to get any more customers in this final half an hour. Yoongi merely moved his chair over to give Hoseok more space to work behind the counter.

“It’s cute.” Yoongi murmured. “So besides sleeping, did you do anything today?”

Jimin sniffed. He had started to breathe heavily and Yoongi could only assume it was because of the youngers inability to breathe through his nose. “I heated some soup and uh… started watching a movie but that only lasted like -snf- fifteen minutes… What about you? Was the shop busy?”

“No, it was uneventful.” Yoongi sighed. “The cute boy next door wasn’t in for some reason.”

“Oh -snf- how boring for you. snf. I’m sure he missed you as much as you missed him.”

“You think?”

“I – Hih’eNGXshh snf.. snf.. ‘EhhiNGXtshew! Ugh… Yeah.” Jimin sighed tiredly, breaking out into harsh cough.

“Bless You.” Yoongi bit his lip. “I hate saying this because I really did miss you and I love speaking to you, but you should probably rest, or take a bath. Maybe a bowl of hot water and a towel over your head if you are too tired to bath. It could help just ease your breathing or something.”

He could barely make out the soft murmur of agreement that came from the younger, directly followed by the distance gurgling sound of nose blowing.

A moment later Jimin replied light heartedly. “Who knew Mr. Min could be so concerned and caring? This is a side I’d love to see more of.”

“Let me come check on you then.” Yoongi insisted.

“Yoongi…” Jimin sniffled and groaned. “I really don’t want to get you sick, Hoseok can’t man the shop alone when you have deliveries. I’ll be fine in a day.”

Yoongi really doubted it, but he would respect Jimin’s plea as far as he saw improvement. He could rely on Taehyung to make sure that his boyfriend didn’t die in a bundle of blankets and tissues, and Jin surely wouldn’t let the man return to work if he wasn’t well enough for it.

“Ah..” Jimin murmured quietly before briefly greeting someone away from the receiver. Yoongi could hear a faint reply but couldn’t make out the actual words.

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah, sorry. Tae just got back and I’m already having medicine aggressively pointed at me.”

“Best you go then.” Yoongi laughed lightly. “Rest well, Minnie.”

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow… love you.”

Jimin hung up and Yoongi felt a warmth rush through his body at the unfamiliar mumbled words.

#bts sickfic #minyoon #jimin is sick #yoongi is whipped #flower shop #phone calls #sneeze kink?#snz #its cute #fanfiction

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boku-no-loveletters · 4 years ago

Note

Hey! I was wondering if I could ask for a matchup. I’ve never done this before but I was recommended your blog. I’m a girl, I’m kinda tall (5’7), I have brown curly hair and big dark brown eyes, my skin is light brown, I’m on the curvier/hourglass figure. Personality wise I come off shy at first but I’m really loyal and talkative with my friends. I have a sarcastic sense of humor and I’m very introverted.

Yo! Thanks for coming over to my blog and it’s cool if you haven’t done this before! I just have gotten out of a problematic thing cuz of minors and it really lifted my spirits up seeing someone put something in my inbox today!

So, I hope you enjoy your match-up!

I’d match you up with…

Shinshou!

-I think Shinshou can understand why you’d be an introverted person, mostly because of the wrong reasons as he was always bullied for his quirk when he was younger and normally invested in staying away from people since the beginning.

-So the chances of you guys meeting were probably going to be on low probabilities and on school property. It might have happened as you were walking down to your classes, but the real connection began just on a few words.

The indigo-haired male walked beside you in the empty halls, the tension in his presence was unnerving and his appearance was even more unsettling than usual. The bags under his eyes had darkened another centimeter of his skin and his messy bed hair couldn't even hold up its own gravity.

His uniform was wrinkled and his steps were uneven as he guided you to your next classroom with him. How fortunate of you to lose the map to the school, only to be left in the hands of this cold genius.

Overall, he was a mess and he sure looked like he didn't want to be bothered right now. So if the rumors were correct, he must've been overtraining again or just thinking and losing sleep.

But that's not it. Shinshou was always training, his hatred for class 1-A and his dream to become a hero was the only thing motivating him to keep pushing forward and forcing his body over the limits. Not only had he become physically stronger in a short matter of time, but even his mentality was stronger too and he was also confident in his abilities, although many were intimidated by him, you were astounded by his persistence.

Aside from his confidence, he was also incredibly intelligent! You always thought he wouldn't like talking with the others because of how reserved he seems, but somehow he knows how to strike up a conversation in an instant! He'd know the answers to the Dailey questions and always kept an eye on his studies

You'd always admired his attitude.

As you were caught up in your thoughts, you suddenly felt Shinshou come to a stop before a door and turn towards it. You lean a bit to the side to see that it was coincidentally class 1-A’s door. Your homeroom. The large frame of the classroom oozed assurance while the quiet chatter of the students could be heard in the background of the hall.

The dreary male stared at it for a moment before turning paths and continuing down the hallway, briefly ignoring you until he looked back. His eyes lingered on your petite figure before he resumed walking.

“Shinshou, wait.” You spoke in almost a whisper. He froze, but still refused to meet your gaze.

“Anyone can be a hero, your intentions just have to be understandable.”

But he still didn’t reply and instead opted on walking, leaving you there to your classroom.

You sighed, gently grabbing the doorknob and slowly opening the door to reveal your classmates. You were pretty sure he'd forget your words when really, he thought about your statement and silently agreed with you.

A smirk tugged at his lips, that wouldn't be the last time he'd see you. You were an interesting one. He could feel it.

-So from there, you two began growing on each other. At first, it started when you guys began randomly finding each other in the strangest places or on pure coincidence. You both didn’t decide to be friends until you made small talk in a walmart parking lot so from there you hit it off.

If I’m being honest, shinshou was just getting suspicious lmao

-You two had begun getting more comfortable and in the process of being familiar with the other. It will start with addressing names, exchanging the recent news, and up until one makes some ridiculously stupid comment and the other retorts with a clever comeback. That’s when he realizes you’re not as worse as he thought you were going to be for a 1-A student.

-I think he’d absolutely adore your sarcasm, he probably gets off to the fact that he gets a snarky response if he teases you too much or makes a stupid comment.

-When it comes to confession, I like to think that Shinshou has a lot of insecurities from his looks to his quirk and that it’s highly likely that he’d distance himself from you to figure out his emotions. He assumes that it is admiration when really, it’s infatuation.

-He’d be really stubborn and unwilling to admit that he has a crush on you if anyone pointed it out to him and would be in denial for a while until he’s actually accepted the fact that he fell for you. But when he does, it hits Hard. No joke.

-He’ll at first begin following you around like a lost puppy and blatantly telling anyone off if they begin hitting on you. They’ll oblige and back off for a bit because they know who he is and what his quirk is. And expect him to be constantly taking up the majority of your attention even while you’re with your other friends. He’ll simply sit by the sidelines and remain as quiet as possible while sitting close to you.

-What can I say? He likes your presence, it’s comforting!

-Once he actually confesses to you, He’d still pretty much be on edge. Mostly because he has never been in a relationship before and he doesn’t really know how it works. Do you give them a kiss every day and take them out on a date every night??? Seriously?

-It would be a team effort for both of you along the way since you both probably don’t have that much experience in dating and all that stuff. He’d might be more anxious than you when it comes to dates.

-A first kiss would be initiated by him, or you. during a heartfelt conversation. He'd likely be pouring out his heart emotionally because he’s just so exhausted and has never had anybody to confide in a relationship.

-He gets tired of training. He’s tired of people. He’s tired of being tired!

-Overall, I think the both of you would make a wonderful couple! You’re both sound fairly introverted with a hint of playfulness, not to mention being shy gives shinshou a plus cuz he gets you to himself more :).

Thanks for requesting! And sorry it took a bit long, my computer deleted part of it.

@rhaenysmartelltarg

#Shinshou hitoshi #hitoshi shinshou #bnha #mha #bnha match-ups #mha match-ups #rhaenysmartelltarg

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misha-moose-dean-burger-lover · 5 years ago

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POSITIVE 20 QUESTIONS TAG GAME

I was tagged by @peanutbutterandgrapejelly. Thank you for the tag, Peanut, this seems pretty loaded, but in a good way, so here goes!!

1. Name 4 fictional characters who showcase your personality the best, with explanations if you want.

Sue Heck! I don't think I let all of it out, but on the inside, I constantly feel like I'm extremely Sue Heck-y, :')

Amy Santiago, in a lot of regards, I'll say. Uh, cares a lot about her friends, ambitious, and would basically die/murder for organization, but also socially awkward and, uh, mostly percepted as a goody-two-shoes. Also, true nerd™.

Mindy Lahiri! (I mean, again, this seems more of a who I feel like I am, and not who I come across as, cause those two things tend to differ on a variety of levels?)

Sam Winchester (you know I had to) Basically, we're both INFJs. I'm not even close to his level, but my brain officially ran out of characters so uh, empathetic, constantly interpreted as "boring" and the "brains", patient, *yearns to settle down with someone they love*, believes in second chances. The whole nine, but toned down XD

2. Aesthetic:

I'd usually have a hard time with this one, but I recently did a long thing about my aesthetic, so! I'm going to say, soft pastel, beige, and shades of white!! A tinge of light academia, but mostly unassumingly modern, and faded rainbows as watermarks.

3. Favorite musical/play? If you've never seen a musical or play, one you'd be interested in seeing?

You got me ~ never seen any. (I mean, school plays don't count, right?) I honestly have a bunch of musicals I want to see, recommendations from friends online, but somehow it always slips my mind. But, off the top of my head, @spot-the-brooklyn-pirate wanted me to check this one out, and I am looking forward to actually doing it sometime: Book of Mormon.

4. What's the best compliment you've ever received?

Mostly, anyone who says I, in any way, made them happy, literally gives me the best compliment ever. And uh, my sister called me inspiring once, and it stuck. When I nagged her into elaborating, she said she thought I was functional in spite of all my flailings, and self-analytic, and it didn't make sense to me, but I still think about that.

And a few people, over the course of time, have named some of my fics as their favorites, and those stay with me for a very long time.

5. How many times have you been in love?

Hardly once. She's still one of the most important people in the world to me, but as somebody great once said, if you don't fight for it, it doesn't count. And we didn't.

6. Embarrassing story or fact about yourself which now makes you laugh?

By far the most embarrassing thing I've ever done, is written a fic on wattpad which revolved around my own life, except for the fact that it really, really didn't. Long story shortened, I was in sixth grade, and had a surface-level-y crush on this guy, and it seemed like a brilliant idea at the time. In the story, we're all in senior year, though the authoress forgot pretty much all the real things about school XD it's not just cringy, but also extremely sixth-grade-y written, and it astounds me to this day that it went on to have like 18,000 views? (I managed to block the entire shtick out, until a few months back, when I randomly remembered and rushed to unpublish the work. *facepalm* it even had all our real names)

7. Favorite Disney/Pixar movie?

This one's so hard. Uh. Ratatouille, maybe?

8. Favorite flower/plant?

I regret having to confess that I probably don't have one :( but hey, my go-to answer for these ones is daisies, because they remind me of the lovely @daisy-jeon <3

9. What's your favorite holiday?

Holi :')

(I miss it being like the older times, though? Somehow it always clashes with my final exams these last few years, and Shelley is often not home, but it still really makes me happy, so just imagine how perfect it used to be, when I was a kid!!)

10. Name three things that made you smile/laugh this past week.

Rewatching The French Mistake!! A really great decision, haha!

The lovely comments an older fic of mine received, (about old Destiel, uwu) since a couple of big blogs happened to reblog it 🙈🙈🙈 and my activity started blowing up!!

A full-blown coffee high, which resulted in me being hilarious through a 98-message monologue to dish, eeeeee!!

11. What song would you play to introduce yourself to someone?

I'd been dreading this question the most, because I'm horrible at remembering good songs when I - need to be. Oofsies.

But I guess I could wing it with 'What About Us' by P!nk.

12. Name something that truly makes you peaceful even at your most stressful moments.

Writing about Character A of a ship going through said stressful moment, and Character B being the best possible responder to all of it. Projection's the key to functionality, kids.

13. What do you, did you, or would you study at college?

Would you, and will you, sound unfortunately like different questions to me, so I'm going to answer the one which is asked. I'd like to major in History, with a minor in English. (And to be crude for a bit, as my sister calls it, thus successfully be left solely employable as a teacher.)

14. This is kind of a weird one, but which outfit of yours makes you feel most like yourself?

My black Avenger's logo t-shirt, with this pink hooded, kinda-down-past-my-hips, not-warm-at-all jacket and any one of my numerous, mwuahaha, grey shorts.

I never said I'd go out of the house in that outfit, did I?

15. What is a quote you live by?

I don't think there aren't any. I'm just here, faking it till I make it. Still, if I had to choose? Misha's "Be Kind to Yourself so You can be Happy enough to Be Kind to Others" is something I aspire to live by.

16. Name the funniest playlist name you have.

I'm sad that I don't have any funnily named ones now. Sorry to disappoint, but I'm hoping that it counts a teensy bit that I have like seven playlists just for background shtuff when I'm working, and they're all named *extremely* similarly, with variations of the word "study" basically, but all have exceptionally different vibes.

But I really am sorry, and I'm going to try and up my playlist-humor-game.

17. Make a reference to an inside joke you have with someone you love with zero context.

'Time for tapwater'.

18. What is a message you'd give your younger self if given a chance?

Don't build your sense of self-worth over the people whose opinions you think matter. You don't have to get everybody to like you. (Oh, and probably don't switch between multiple first-person-pov's, even though you're just writing the most unrealistic self-indulgent fiction EVER.)

19. Who is your favorite family member? (If you have no good blood family members, feel free to mention someone in your found family)

Hands down, my sister. Shelley, didi, @iamcharliebradburylevelperfect, you're like the best part of my life, and you're probably going to be the longest part of it, too. Cause we might not have the best record for funny titles to call each other by, but we still nail the cheesy till the end of the line moments, ;)

20. What's a secret dream of yours?

I, uh. Want to run a completely-revolutionalizing-the-concept-of-education-style school ~ a boarding school actually, with my best friend dish. And as a means to acquire funds for it? We're going to do a whole lotta stand-up. :D

(Oh, and since i've already rambled for at least a thousand words, so what's the harm in a few more? At some point, probably on my birthday, I want to do a YouTube livestream, a pre-planned one of course, and everybody I've ever been frens with, on this dumb, wholesome hellsite???? They're all sent an invitation to join!! And there's nothing to do, really, we just talk and everyone's enjoying themselves, and I dunno, I had a dream about this once, and I've been so ridiculously smitten with the idea since!

Huh, maybe I could rally forces starting now, to make this possible by my eighteenth!!)

If anyone would like to play, these are really awesome questions! @3dg310rdsupreme @mystybloo @thotfordean @bcozwhythefuknot @theninthdutchessofhell @awkward-penguin-in-a-trenchcoat @quicksilver-ships @all-or-nothing-baby @screamatthescreen @telefunkies @elvenlicht @facepalmmylifeu @specialagentrin @noemithenephilim @but-for-the-gods-three-days

#l o n g #long post #about me #i finally did it #stuff about me

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benbantz · 4 years ago

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Week 17 with long term Covid

Hello to anyone reading this, those I know and those I don’t.

Had Covid 19 now for 17 weeks (or suffering after effects of covid, how ever you want to word it.) Point is had/have Corona and it’s still kicking my arse.

So since my recent facebook update (after being pretty quiet on social media for a while) a couple of peeps have messaged me asking about my symptoms and stuff as (apart from the first 2-3 weeks) I haven't really gone into any detail I just sort of say 'having rough week' or 'things flared up again' etc etc. Without going into too much detail about anything specific. So for anyone interested, and because people have been curious and asking - and as you’ll see is far to detailed to explain person to person (and want to spread the word about long haulers as a lot of people struggling) So it’s just easier for me to have it in one place. For myself more then anything. And if you get anything out of it then that’s great.

Things are just starting to come out about long haulers in the media and on the news and I know people are interested to learn a bit more about it all. So while I’m having a not too bad a time last couple of days I’d thought it’s a good a time as any to go thru all my symptoms. Get them typed out for first time.

And maybe it will be helpful to someone who randomly comes across this post - (thou please don’t use as a guide), every case is different, a lot of similarities and cross overs , but ultimately different Just because someone you know might be having a rough couple of days or experiencing a couple of these symptoms it could be something completely unrelated to covid. (Make sure you check with your GP or call 111 if you think you have covid symptoms long term or otherwise.) I am not a Dr.

Here's a list of everything been going on with me over last 17 weeks. Some experiences have been completely new to me so very hard to explain , some descriptions may sound a little odd , but hopefully you get idea of what I mean! (Also sorry for any grammar mistakes....I dropped out of English A level)

Those who come across this and don’t know me personally know that while this is a (mostly) serious (but hopefully uplifting) post I’m very sarcastic and use dumb humour to deflect from how shit life is at the moment! :-)

So first thing of the bat I'll explain is I've realised in recent weeks it's been easier to think of it as good and bad days/weeks rather then getting better/worse (as in first 10 or so weeks when I thought of it as 'it's getting better' and got in that positive mindset, the kickbacks have obviously beaten the piss out of me mentally as well as physically, as I've had about four big relapses now where I thought I'm on the right track, having a good couple of weeks then bam, I seem to go back to square one for no real apparent reason. So when I say bad day I'm describing when everything amps/flares up again, A few more symptoms go up and the volumes up on high,and likewise a good day is when things seem to be moving in right direction again and I get a bit of a break.(So now I just appreciate them when they come and try make most out of them.) A good day isn’t a symptom free day by any means, it’s just better then the bad ones.

OK so on to my symptoms.

Specific Areas

Chest - Since the first evening it kicked of early March my chest has felt like a giant has had his hand around it - that’s non stop, constant (told you my explanations were weird.)

On the better days it's a very light grip I can get on and do things to a point, but I am always aware it's there. On a bad day it's grip tightens and he squeezes (or his fingers press into a couple of key areas - been pressing on my back a lot last few weeks.) - That’s been non stop and has not gone away since beginning. Thou I do believe its starting to ease a little.

- Chest pain - A shooting pain in my chest (slightly different from description above, feels more like its needles on inside of body. Thankfully these are uncommon, they pop up if I push myself a bit too far one day or if I’m having rougher week.(And it’s not heart related)

Lungs/Breathing - Haven't felt like I've taken in a full lungful of air since beginning, I take a deep breath but only feels like I'm taking in 80- 85% ish (on a good day) 65- 75% ish (on a bad day) - This is week 17 numbers btw, take maybe 10-15% off when it was at worst. I think the best way I can describe it is it feels like there’s a filter or a sieve/strainer at top of lungs, on a good day there’s more spaces available to breathe thru (but still there’s a filter) and on a bad day more spaces close and I'm breathing thru less.

*Thankfully bar the first week where I had to get paramedic out, I haven't been gasping for air, I've certainly had to just lay and just concentrate on only breathing a few times because the filters have closed up a lot more (in the night mostly) especially where my bodies relaxed and I've woken and panicked short of air. Yes that’s as terrifying as it sounds.

- The air I do take in doesn't feel clean or fresh (best way I can describe it is when you go to a zoo and they have a indoor Rain Forrest/safari area .... very that lol) That was constant the first 12 or so weeks (even when getting fresh air outside) thankfully that’s eased a little and not so prominent, still doesn't feel like I’m breathing in fresh air but its not so hot and stuffy and noticing the difference when I go outside now.

Throat/Mouth - Burning/inflamed mouth - This is by far been the most uncomfortable/hardest for me to ignore and just get on with day to day stuff, from maybe week 6 to week 14 it was pretty much non stop burning mouth and throat (Call my mum Khaleesi because I was spitting fire.)

Whole inside of my mouth and down my throat was just inflamed/swollen (felt like I had a golf ball stuck down there) and burning hot. The last couple of weeks its eased I don’t wake up with it (unless i’m having a flare up/bad day) It's still very on/ off but thankfully not constant like it was. And have since learned that high histamine foods make it worse - same with my chest and few other things, (so choc, dairy, alcohol, fizzy drinks ...my diet essentially ) So have cut most of them down/out. Ice lollies have been my savior on hot throat days. - Marble in throat - Another hard one to explain, it feels like there’s a marble sort of sized ball of phlegm that I constantly need to clear. (OK maybe not that hard to explain - also sorry for the gross imagery.) But not enough mucus coming up to warrant the feeling, it’s irritating more then anything - but a few weeks ago was probs golf ball sized, so again improvement! - This sort of ties in with with the inflamed mouth, but the first thing to flare up on bad day is my tongue, feels tingly most of the time anyway but more so on a flare up/bad day. - Same with my teeth / gums and the tingly sensation, (my teeth constantly feel like that sensation when you have some orange juice after brushing your teeth.) Sensitive/fuzzy I guess. Not particularly bothersome or concerning...just weird.

Nose

- This is probably one of newest ones, nose has felt hot(on and off)/bunged up for last few weeks. (But I know its not if that makes sense) I guess you could say same as lungs - not breathing in a full nose-full of air either. - sorry again for gross TMI but any mucus or boogers are clear (like almost see thru clear/never been cleaner clear) - Phantom smells - A really odd one, I smell smoke and gas a lot, not just smell it, it feels like its in my nose and my mouth - especially smoke, almost like I’ve eaten it sometimes (non smoker in smoke free flat btw). Was a lot more prominent in first few weeks ,so much so that before I realised it was a symptom I had my carbon monoxide alarms checked because it was making me paranoid I could smell smoke/gas. A bizarre one for sure. Pops up randomly now and again.

Eyes - Last couple of weeks have been getting bit of blurry vision and sore or dry eye , I'm already blind as shit so hard to tell in terms of blurriness how bad this one is, but def finding it harder to concentrate on one thing for too long (but that sort of ties in with brain fog - which i'll get to) but pretty sure once this is done with and I go to opticians will likely need a stronger prescription (some other long haulers who never had eye problems before are now having to wear glasses) No idea if that’s a permanent one but hopefully i’m at peak of it.

Ears - My left ear has felt blocked pretty much since start (or like it needs to pop some days) Most the time I can ignore it but can be quite distracting if it kicks up a couple of dials.Which is likely why I get ear ache in same ear often as well.

*Also for most the things listed above it has always been worse on my left side of body, lung, eyes, ear, headaches.

- Tinnitus (correct word for ringing in ears right?) Usually kicks in early afternoon or on bad day. Varies on strength depending on the day I’m having.

Head/Brain - Brain Fog - So the sort of very basic science behind this is because my lungs aren't producing enough oxygen my brain knows this, so is lending them some to help out...but because of this it means I’m experiencing what is known as brain fog (I don’t know what its actually called, likely has a better more official sounding name) - my concentration is very low, i’m finding it hard to retain things and concentrate more then usual. (not been up to reading or watching something new for month or so as I just cant focus on it) Also been getting odd words muddled or confused (but the bar wasn't the highest with me on that front ha ha)

Been dropping things when I think I have them in my hand. I do however think this is improving (The fact that I have typed this out with just a couple short breaks so far is much better then two weeks ago when I couldn't even focus on a computer game for more then half a hour) so as my lungs improve so does this or vice versa on flare up. *Edit - This whole post has taken a couple of days to draft and type up, so not too bad in terms of needing breaks etc.

-I'm also constantly aware of my brain... like I can feel it all the time (I literally cant explain that any other way lol, I guess its just heavier at moment so I can feel it against my skull) best explanation I think you'll get from that one. - Have a headache most the time (so much so that I sort of forget it’s there.) Thankfully most the time there mild/low and I can forget or distract myself but like everything else if I'm having a bad few days it goes up a notch. Likely connected to the brain fog.

Stomach and Lower abdomen - Period pains - only way I can explain it, generally thought after nearly 10 years without them it was messing my body about so much I was getting phantom periods. (I’m a transgender man, 4+ years on testosterone, for anyone I don’t know who comes across this) been there done that, brought the t-shirt.. then sent it back because it wasn’t for me! Very strong and painful on and off for first eight weeks, get the odd twinge now and again but think that ones done with, thank the gods. - Stomach Pains - Few aches and pains on /off, and recently experienced what felt like needle/stabbing pain for short while in short bursts - and I only really mention stomach because I haven't had the widely publicised 'covid shits' (yet, touch wood... or cloth) So yay!

Heart - Palpitations - First 8 weeks was on and off most days to the point if I was sat still my heart would be palpitating. (I couldn't even sit and listen to music I enjoyed as it would make my heart go mad.) - When I do get the palpitations it sets most things off, so if palpitations do start I generally know I'm about to have rough couple of hours or days and can’t do much, for obvious safety reasons. Thankfully these have subsided a lot last 6 or so weeks. Still get them every few days but generally know whats setting me off and how to lower them down and they don’t last as long.

Hands and Feet - Skin been very dry last couple of months, cracking and peeling on hands and feet (ew) - Pins and needles/ numb fingers and toes - Get this a lot, obviously very normal stuff but just find them coming on a lot more (especially if i’m holding something like my ipad, phone or xbox controller for a while) Fingers feel numb/puffy a lot too. (Likely also why I keep dropping things) - Also to tie in with skin, have had a on /off spots on chest, face and shoulders for few weeks, they all came up at same time, not irritant or itchy or anything, just there.

General/Other weird things - Voice - So this is one that frustrates me the most, I have had next to no voice for last maybe 10 weeks. I just cant chat to people at moment. For first 4 weeks wasn't to bad (I even started a youtube channel to keep me occupied and distracted) but slowly week by week it went a little bit more each time. I can talk for short periods of time if I have to/choose to ,like its not gone completely, but it kicks up all the things I mentioned in my throat and mouth directly after. If the phone rings I have to decide if it’s worth answering, in doing so knowing i’m going to have a rough day or so after. Someday’s I feel it's better then others like couple of weeks ago, chatted to my brothers online on xbox for half an hour or so for the first time in weeks, and caught up with a friend on phone for 10 minutes...but a couple of days later everything flared up again. So it's still trial and error and just being patient with my voice. (I'm quite confident no long term damage is being done now as few people in group i’m in reported there voice just eventually got better over time.) Definitely the symptom I’m having to be most patient with. - Fatigue and tiredness - My days now are normally diddily done by 4-5, (except if its a bad day then most of the day is a write off) No matter how little or much I've done, by 5-6 my body and mind are exhausted. As someone who has insomnia, pre covid I would maybe have 1-2 all nighters every ten or so days sprinkled in with 5-6 days of at most 3-4 hours sleep. In the last 17 weeks I have had just 3 all nighters, and maybe just under ten 3-4 hour sleeps. Otherwise i’m getting at least 5+ hours a night. This is the one covid thing I'd like to keep please lol. I think it's easing a little (most the bad night sleeps have been in last month) and on good days tiredness is kicking in a little later, or it's taking me a little longer to drift off. But generally am cream crackerd a lot of time, especially if I push myself too far on a bad day. - Loss/Increased appetite - This sort of ties in with what I mentioned earlier about different foods causing set backs, the first 6 weeks I had no appetite and lost a bit of weight (I do put a lot of this down to extreme worry and stress thou) Then I went thru a phase of being very hungry for a few weeks and put most of the weight I had lost back on. I'm somewhere in the middle now, probably because I know most of anything I eat will set me back a little (because as mentioned fussy git = high histamine diet) so i’m cutting portions (otherwise known as the amount of cheese I add to everything!) and cutting out all most junk food (you’ll never part me from my crisps!) and non healthy drinks.

- Bloated and dehydration - This one I sort of put in pencil because it could be covid related but I also think it could be side effects from the brown asthma inhaler I was prescribed to help with breathing. I’m still undecided as it pops up especially when I was using inhaler more but it does happen days after I’ve last used it. At it’s worse I was getting up to pee a lot! because I was thirsty all the time. So of course was just very bloated around the belly.

*Also talking of peeing, (Great segway Ben) number 1′s and 2′s have been very different then normal, urine thicker and bubbly,and smells/is coloured different, (same with 2′s) Also have a completely different body odour at the moment,(pungent) having to use deodorant twice as much as normal. - Admit it your life’s a little bit better now you know that information.

- THE HEAT! - I touched on this with my mouth and nose being on fire, but for the first 10-12 weeks I did not go a day where at least a couple of things were not burning hot ,like hot to the touch as well, not just inside...(very different experience then having a temperature). Extreme heat in one very specific part of body. Ears, forehead, cheeks, chest, back, nose, mouth,throat to name a few of prominent ones. Over time they have faded (if something does feel hot now its generally not hot to the touch anymore.) Maybe on a bad day a couple of things will burn up. (But in saying that, been calling today a good day but nose is quite hot) but point is its better. - Mood swings/Anxiety - While i’m fairly confident anything emotional has stemmed from experiencing...well everything you've just read. Rather then it being its own symptom (thou I have had days of uncontrollable crying, days of anger..that perhaps outside of covid I would still of had one of those days but just not to such a extreme, I think with everything going on its just amped that emotion and anxiety up.) it's obviously been very stressful and anxiety inducing. That’s only calmed down in last week since finding the facebook group of other people going thru the same thing. I'm now seeing that people are slowly improving, i'm seeing I've not been going mad and it's all very real and not just happening to me. So the bad days are easier to deal with now and not hitting me emotionally like a ton of bricks anymore. I honestly couldn't see the end of the tunnel two weeks ago but can see it now (even if I take a step forward one day but then 2-3 back another...I see it still.)

*Mushy moment Alert - A good a place as any to include while I'm talking about emotion - Even thou she probs wont see this,but want to mention my mum. She’s been my rock thru all this, she messages me at least twice everyday without fail, since day 1. Even thou I know she's been worried sick about me herself, she's reassured and calmed me down on the harder more stressful days. I dread the mornings when things have gone downhill a bit and having to tell her ,because I know she'll worry, but after a few texts we both end up sort of reassuring and calming the other down. (especially in the earlier days when it was really bad, scary, new and unknown.) When it was really getting me down for a while and I wanted nothing to do with anything covid related and just stay in bed and pretend this wasn't happening to me, she dug out the articles and tips and things to help or give me a boost. (Not to mention all the coming and going she and my step dad have done for me last 4 months and taking care of my shopping for first 9 or so weeks...because I was a useless mess of a human) I know it’s basic mum stuff but this would be 10x harder and lonelier without her. Random detour I know but can’t talk about my covid experience and recovery without mentioning her.

Almost looking forward to sending her the first 'Everything normal today' text as much as I look forward to experiencing it....almost. ;-)

Amount of Symptoms On A Typical Day

On a good day - (when I think virus was at it's worse in the first 10-14 weeks) - 4-6 symptoms ( 2 or 3 cranked up to a medium or high otherwise on mild)

On a bad day - At peak/worse - 6-10 symptoms (throat, chest and no voice on high volume, maybe a couple of things like palpitations and brain fog, heat on medium/high, other weird stuff on mild/low)

Good day - Now 17 weeks in (excluding my voice which is still a medium to high issue most days) - 3-4 Symptoms on low to mild - usually there’s something still simmering on a medium always ready to turn up to a high if I push it too much in terms of walking or talking. (often my chest) Bad Day (Now) - 4-7 Symptoms - 1 to 3 on medium (maybe a couple will kick up to high on first day of a flare up, but generally now for shorter periods of time.)Everything else on mild or low.

So there has def been improvement in last 6 weeks, i’m sure it wont all be plain sailing and I know/prepare to expect another 'flare up' and then a bad few days. But recently instead of the bad days being 2-3 weeks of it constantly, the duration is getting shorter each time (last bad few days was just under a week) So things are slowly improving, and i’m sure in time so will the amount of symptoms and the strength of each symptom.

I've probably missed a couple of silly/odd little things that have gone on (likely because they were so early on or very brief (or I’ve forgotten) - fever and nausea to name a couple. When I got my notes together these were the main ones that came to mind. Quite a lot actually sitting back reading them, and I think the scary (but good) thing is, x-ray came back fine, bloods came back fine. People have had MRI's, camera’s down there throat, most coming back fine. Covid just not showing up on any tests(unless someones suffered further complications with something) - hence why a lot of people struggling to be taken seriously by there GP's or even loved ones who think there just 'exaggerating’ or its just ‘anxiety and stress'...no living with all what you just read causes anxiety and stress Mary!

But yeah could waffle on, once its definitely gone and I breathe and look back I can perhaps get a better overview of everything and give you better analysis of all that’s gone on. I get asked 'so when do you think it will be gone?' almost as much as 'are you better now?' To the first question, meh I don't know, I'm now into month 4/week 17 (well month 5 if I include last couple of days of Feb when I believe I caught it and had the very mild cold early March) still a lot of things going on with my body, some new things could still pop up, so instead of saying 'I think it will be gone by..' ,like I did in the first weeks. I'm just taking it week by week (or day by day if it kicks up a notch) not making any big demands of myself or my body, doing what I can each day....but not pushing it. Instead of the sad, anxiety inducing thought 'when will it go' or the one all us long haulers worry about a lot ‘Will it ever go?’ I now try to think instead 'it will go!.'

To any fellow long haulers I say hang in there, keep fighting, trust your body and that it will get better. Take it day by day. Stay as positive as you can when everything 'flares up again' after a couple of weeks of good progress (easier said then done I know) but know it wont be forever as much as it feels like it is. Don’t be afraid to ask for help (I hate going to Drs would much rather just 'get on with it' , but from pestering a little I got a blue inhaler which has helped me a lot day to day,and had x-ray and blood tests which also put my mind at ease when they came back clear. So don’t be afraid to ask to get these things checked if you’re worried. I've been lucky with my GP's thou who I think have generally believed me and taken me seriously and I know not everyone is getting that help or respect. I think it’s really not helped us that in the early days people were stubbing their toes and thinking they had caught covid and calling their Dr’s (I’m exaggerating but hopefully you get my point lol), so if you do get a not so helpful interaction, be patient,explain yourself or try again with another Dr, remember a GP will only advise you symptom by symptom and not as a whole. Anyway I’m repeating stuff you already know by now lol.

Stay positive. Stay hopeful and stay safe.

To anyone else, believe us, know this is very real, and that it absolutely sucks. Its not just anxiety or in our head. We're not exaggerating - in fact most of us are probably playing it down or just not elaborating on things for an easy life and because when someone asks 'are you better now?' it's easier to just smile and nod and answer 'getting there slowly' because the truth is...well what you just read lol. (And I'm a particularly mild case...next to no coughing, no spells in A and E, a breeze for a lot of other people with long term) Keep yourselves safe (most long haulers have no previous medical /problems/conditions. Some ,myself included, have weakened immune systems due to a long term health condition. A unlucky few are fighting another long term medical illness as well as covid. I'm lucky in that I have no dependants (except 4 easy to please gecko's) and was not working prior to catching it - some are having to deal with all this and be full time parents, or have been to and fro with their jobs (thinking there better then relapsing after going back). There’s mums messaging on behalf of there young kids who have it, lots of young people (one of the lads that co runs the group is 22 I believe), there's athletes/health fanatics used to running miles every day been completely knocked of there game unable to even walk to end of road some days. People of all age ranges. Point is anyone can catch it, it might not just be 'a couple of rough weeks' It might take over half a year for you to recover from. This myth that it's short and sweet, or a walk in the park if your young and healthy needs to be squashed because its just not accurate.

If not for my mum and our family and the facebook group I found, (Positive path of wellness - Covid UK Long Haulers) I'd be struggling, really struggling. It's scary, brutal and lonely. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. The virus is still out there it has not gone. Keep sanitising hands and wear a mask in busy places!. - Tell the guy who's life this has been for 17 weeks, why wearing a mask in public places, to keep yourself and others safe from catching this nightmare, is a inconvenience for you Karen...go on, I'll wait...

Maybe you can help prevent yours or someone else's next few months from being even worse. x

Was going to just make this a one time post on tumblr account but if it’s a help to anyone (especially fellow long haulers) I’ll post some other bits and bobs when i’m up to it. (thinking of doing a post about things/products etc that I think have been helping me. If that’s useful to anyone) Or just some positive/ funny things to keep spirits up. Keeping it all positive and upbeat as possible.

So I’ll see if anyone reads this first and go from there

So I guess in conclusion ...lol I’m just joking, this post is really done now, go back to your lives, this garbled mess of self woe (worlds smallest violin is back in its case now), sarcasm and naff humour has taken up far too much of all of our days already. Go peacefully amongst the things. :-)

Stay safe everyone x

#covid-19 #covid19longhaul #longtermcovid #coronavirus #coronalonghaul #covid 19 symptoms #corona symptoms #long haul covid #covid long haulers #covid recovery #covid uk #corona uk #corona long haulers uk

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give-baek-my-love · 5 years ago

Text

Keep It A Secret (II)

Characters: Jimin X Reader X Jungkook

Genre: Angst/Fluff

Series: Intro, One, Two

Description: Without even a simple goodbye, Jimin, your childhood best friend , left to Seoul to pursue his dream as an idol. Ten years later just when you thought that you were finally ready to let it all go and start your own career as an idol, you’re left in a situation where it seems your past isn’t ready to let Jimin go just yet.

[BREAKING] Dispatch reports BTS’ Jimin and Purple’s Chaejin are dating.

You stared the article title countless times, too afraid to read any further. Although both their faces were mostly covered up with hats and face masks, you could immediately tell them apart. You remembered Chaejin wearing that exact jacket just hours ago before she headed out. You also could tell that the male who was holding the car door for Chaejin was Jimin just from the slight view of his eyes that were peaking through from beneath his lowered cap.

What the fuck.

There were millions of questions running through your head. How did they even get to knowing each other? With BTS and the group’s busy schedules how did they have to the time to start dating? Sure your group would sometimes bump into BTS, but it was also just a brief glance or greeting.

‘How do you think they met?’ April asked, diverting your attention away from your own thoughts.

‘I don’t know.’ you mumbled. You felt nothing. You wanted to at least feel some sort of feeling but all you just felt numb. You just couldn’t process the fact that your best friend and ex-best friend were dating.

Perhaps April sensed that something was wrong because you suddenly felt her warm hands gripping your arm,

‘Are you okay?’

Once again peeling your eyes away from the screen, you handed her back the phone without reading beyond the title. Giving April a slight nod, you dashed into the washroom to hide the tears that were quickly streaming down your face.

In hopes of hiding your sobs, you turned the tap on full blast and sunk to the floor allowing yourself for the first time to embrace the emotions that were running through your body.

No. No I’m not okay. -

You don’t know how long you stayed in the washroom, but eventually Manager Kim knocked on the door and told you to finish up whatever you were doing and meet him along with the rest of the members in the living room.

After washing your face and glancing into the mirror, your puffy red eyes were all you could see. Your reflection in the mirror no longer looked like your old self. She had hollowed cheeks and eyes that seemed much too big in contrast to her slimmer face, all highlighting just how much pain and hardship you had to go through in order to become an idol. But all that blood, sweet and tears that you went through was nothing compared to this heartbreak. A heartbreak whose cause was simply self-induced, all because you fell in love with your childhood best friend ten years ago, someone who could never imagine would ever feel the same way.

Eventually you walked out of the bathroom and saw that everyone including Chaejin was back. She was smiling. She was practically swimming in joy. Perhaps if she wasn’t your best friend and perhaps if your career wasn’t partially because of her doing, you would have yelled at her by now, asking why she would jeopardize the group’s future like this. Everyone knew how much a dating rumour could negatively affect the group, so you wondered why she as the leader would do this when the group’s popularity was just starting to rise. Instead of taking the avaliable space next to Chaejin, you decided to squeeze yourself next to April who was seated the furtherest away from the leader. The whole group knew that you and Chaejin were very close, so close that the two of you basically never left each other’s side, so when you decided choose a seat that wasn’t next to her, you earned a couple of confused glances from the members.

Clearing his throat, Manager Kim began,

‘I’m sure that you are all aware of the article about Chaejin that dispatch uploaded early this morning. The article has been confirmed to be true. Whether you all knew about it prior to the article or not, the company and BigHit both confirmed the article to being true. Also whether or not you like or dislike their relationship, the company and I just hope that you will all not let your emotions and feelings ruin the group’s atmosphere and schedules especially when in front of the media and fans. That being said, the company has decided that the group will go on a short break just so the public and fans can have some time to digest the information and won’t bombard you guys with questions about their relationship. During this time, you are allowed to stay in Seoul if you wish so, if not, you can go back home and visit your family, or take a small vacation if you like, but you must let us know ahead of time. Lastly, just as a reminder the dating ban is still in full effect for everyone else. If you have any questions you can come to me or Manager Lee to discuss.’

You were angry not only because the entire group’s schedule had to be canceled all because of Chaejin’s relationship, but also the fact that she was the only exception to the dating ban. You wondered if perhaps it was because her father owned the company that she was allowed to do as she pleased, but regardless you found her actions childish and selfish, which seemed very unlike her. Chaejin was always known to be rational and well planned, so she must have known that the media always had eyes on BTS whenever they were up and about, but why did she so openly go on a date with Jimin? It almost seemed like they were purposely showcasing their relationship.

With no further questions, the members all started discussing their vacation plans and ideas. You determined that distance and space was what you needed right now so you were going to take the first train home tomorrow morning and visit your parents for the first time in a year.

Just as you were about to get up and start packing, Chaejin sat down next you and asked,

‘Are you mad at me?’

You debated on lying and tell her that you’re okay and that you’re happy for her relationship, but the betrayal that you felt was impossible to ignore.

‘Yes. I am. Why did you do it?’

‘I... I’m sorry. I should have told you first, but if I knew that if I told you before I saw him last night you would have stopped me.’

Stopped her? Does she seriously think that I would have stopped her from going on a date?

‘Stop you? Chaejin why would I stop you from dating? I just wanted a heads up. I don’t care that you want to date, but I wish that you would have at least considered the consequences and had been more careful. We all worked so hard to debut and publicly dating right now could really ruin our reputation.’

‘Y/N... I’m sorry. It’s just...’ She started but then quietly trailed off.

Something was off. Chaejin seemed like she was holding something back. Although most days you wouldn’t pester her, today you simply just was not in the mood for anyone’s bullshit. You assumed that no matter what she said the day truly couldn’t get any worse.

‘Okay. You’re hiding something. Tell me. I’m done with these secrets that you’re keeping from me.’

Suggesting that the two of you needed to talk in private, you moved towards the bedroom.

‘Tell me.’ you said the moment Chaejin closed the door behind her, wasting no time at all.

Watching Chaejin take a deep breath, she quietly said,

‘It’s a publicity stunt Y/N.’

‘WHAT?’ you couldn’t help just blurt out loud.

Taking another long deep breath, Chaejin seemed like she was trying to collect her words before finally continuing,

‘The whole date was planned Y/N. Dad said that although the group was doing well, he thought that we would have done better by now. So... he suggested that the we create some sort of commotion or event for the public to learn about. And I suggested that maybe a dating scandal would be ideal-‘

‘You’re fucking with me right? You came up with the dating scandal? Do you know how badly this “stunt” of yours could go? What if this backfires? What are you doing to do then?’ You angrily cut off.

You were furious but also stupidly glad that she wasn’t actually dating Jimin. You were angry that your best friend was willing to put the group’s future at risk all because the group’s popularity wasn’t as high as the company wanted it to be. You knew that rising to the ‘top’ was not something that would be easily be done. Simple the act of performing in front of an audience was always something that you dreamed of and you thought that Chaejin believed in the same idea, but clearly that wasn’t it for her.

‘Y/N… my dad was so upset and worried about the group. And… with my dad and Bang PD being cousins, the scandal was easily organized. I know that you don’t agree with me doing this, but I didn’t want to upset or disappoint my dad. And I’m sorry that I couldn’t tell you earlier. I knew that if I told you about this you would have tried to talk me out of it, but I couldn’t let this chance slip.’

Wait. CEO is related to Bang PD?

You had so many questions, yet you didn’t know where to begin. Perhaps Chaejin noticed how taken back you were because before you could even construct a question, she explained,

‘I didn’t know that my dad was related with Bang PD either. At least not until recently when my entire family celebrated my grandma’s 80th birthday. You know how big my family is, right? Half the aunts and uncles that I saw that night I’ve never even met before, and don’t get me started on how many cousins I just discovered I have.’

You were starting to understand and digest the current situation, but you wondered,

‘But why Park Jimin?’

You thought that perhaps her dad or Bang PD randomly chose a member from BTS for the scandal, but immediately froze at the sight of Chaejin suddenly looking flustered.

Oh no.

‘Y/N…. I like him.’

What?

You broke into a cold sweat with those three simple words.

Chaejin likes Jimin?

You remembered all the times when the group was interviewed about their ideal types and how Chaejin always answered saying that Jimin was her ideal type, but you always thought that it was just a simple celebrity crush. Never something like this. Your mouth opened and closed over and over again without a single spoken word. Shocked at the sudden confession, you were too shaken up to even speak. If you could dig a hole in the ground at this very single second, you would have done it, anything to just escape this uncomfortable feeling in the pit of your stomach.

The room had gotten awkwardly quiet, and it was Chaejin who was the first to speak up as you were staring into nowhere specific with your mind racing at a mile per minute,

‘Y/N why didn’t you tell me that you knew Jimin?’

Snapping your gaze to Chaejin, she seemed uncomfortable and somewhat hurt.

‘How did you know that I knew him?’ you asked.

You had spent the last eleven years keeping the knowledge of Jimin away from Chaejin mainly because just the mention of his name could almost bring you to tears. You couldn’t deal with the fact that a part of you still wasn’t over him. For the past years no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t bring yourself to fall in love with another person. You had always found yourself comparing every single man to Jimin and none of them could even compete with him in your eyes. Park Jimin was meant to be the one and only secret that you kept away from Chaejin, but now that she knew about your secret, you suddenly felt more naked and bare.

‘When I first saw Jimin last night it was awkward and we didn’t say much, but once I brought up that you and I were close friends he told me that the two of you grew up together and were best friends before he had to leave to Seoul and pursue his career as am idol.’

Close friends.

Although he was your best friend growing up, you had always wished that perhaps even once he would have thought of you as more than a close friend, but he had made it clear to Chaejin last night that the two of you were simply just friends. The two words left a bitterness in your mouth that you wished would just go away.

When you left Chaejin without a single comment, she asked again,

‘Why didn’t you tell me about him? Did you… like him Y/N?’

‘Chaejin… stop that’s ridiculous. I didn’t tell you then because it’s all in the past. We were close once but like he said he moved away and we just broke around that’s it.’

You tried your best to stay composed, but unfortunately with her as your best friend, Chaejin saw right through you.

‘You like him.’ She simply stated without an ounce of uncertainty.

‘I liked him.’

‘Y/N don’t bullshit with m-‘

‘I’m not doing this right now with you okay? You can choose not to believe me if you want to. That’s your decision. Whatever I feel for him doesn’t matter because I’m not the one that might screw our group over.’

Perhaps if the conversation wasn’t about Jimin you would have reacted differently, but because he was still such a sensitive topic, you couldn’t control the feelings that were racings in your head. Without giving her another chance to continue on, you grabbed your bag and headed out of the room towards Manager Kim asking him to take you to the train station immediately.

The train ride back home went by quickly as you stared blankly through the window and into the outside world. Your mind kept racing though everything that had happened in the last 24 hours and kept worrying about the future of your group. You couldn’t help but worry how this scandal would change your group’s future, how it would affect the atmosphere between the members, but most importantly you couldn’t help but worry about how the fans were going to react. It’s only been a year since the group had debuted, but you had already grown attached to them. They were the ones who cheered you all on, and they were your main source of happiness so they meant the world to you. Lastly, you hated to admit it but you were worried about Jimin. You worried about how he would handle this scandal. Sure the date was planned, but the reactions to the scandal are something that no one can predict, and you were worried about how the public would react.

You had spent the last years trying your hardest to move on from Jimin, and even though you knew that becoming an idol meant that it was no longer possible to ignore his existence and even mentally prepared for what you thought to be every single possible situation, never would you have thought that Chaejin, your best friend and leader of the group, would be dating Jimin, your first love.

*Ding* *Ding*

Throughout the entire train ride your phone had been constantly alerting you of new messages, but knowing that it was probably going to be Chaejin, you decided to ignore them.

Your parents were surprised to see that you were home without any prior notice, but once you briefly explained to them what had happened, they quickly empathized with your current situation and decided to spend the day simply relaxing at home.

Simple. And relaxing was exactly how the first few days of your vacation went. For the most part you spent the days just sleeping, or at least trying to sleep, eating all your favourite foods, and spending quality time with your parents and close friends. Ever since Jimin’s parents had found out that you came back home, they asked your parents for the two families to plan a dinner party, but you constantly declined their invites. Of course you knew that his parents meant well, but after what had recently happened, you didn’t want to be reminded of Jimin.

It had been a week since the company had announced the group’s indefinite break before your mom finally started asking questions. Although you had explained that you were just disappointed of Chaejin’s decisions, she saw right through you.

One morning after your dad left for work, your mom joined you on the couch adn asked,

‘How’s Chaejin and the other members doing?’

‘Most of the members went home. I’m not sure about Chaejin.’ You shrugged.

While you had kept in contact with the other members, you purposely ignored all of Chaejin’s phone calls and text messages. The truth was you didn’t know how you felt about the entire situation. Of course you wanted the group to do well, and the scandal would become a source of advertisement for the group, but the fact that the scandal could also end badly for the group made it very worrisome, and it didn’t help that Chaejin was ‘dating’ Jimin. If you were being completely honest with yourself, what made this the most uncomfortable was that you were still so attached to Jimin, even if it was one-sided, you couldn’t stand the idea of someone as important as Jimin being dragged into such circumstances that could cause harm on his end. And of course it goes without saying that you were jealous and worried that Chaejin and Jimin would become close and actually end up dating. You knew that Chaejin had always had a crush on Jimin but you didn’t think that her celebrity crush could turn into anything more, however knowing that now she has a chance to go on dates with Jimin and spend time with him, you couldn’t help but feel jealousy boiling from within.

Although you had said few words about the situation since you came home, Chaejin’s mother had called your mother the day you went back home to explain the entire situation and when your mom called Jimin’s mother to confirm the dating rumour, it turned out his mother was just as surprised as everyone else. Your mom had hoped that you would eventually open up and talk about the situation, but when she saw that you were getting increasingly upset every day, she knew that she couldn’t keep quiet anymore.

‘Y/N it’s okay to be hurt.’ She suddenly said.

Turning to her, you were so shocked with her comment that it took you a couple of seconds before you recollected your thoughts and said,

‘I’m not hurt.’

Right?

To be fair, you weren’t entirely sure if you were actually hurt. Uncomfortable. Yes. Jealous. Yes. But hurt?

Grabbing your hands into hers, she simply said,

‘I don’t need you to prove anything to me. I just want you to be happy and be honest with yourself. Okay?’

The two of you sat hand in hand for minutes, both not saying a word while you were slowly processing everything that your mom said. Were you happy? No. Were you being honest with yourself? I don’t know more.

‘Mom… I feel like I’m losing.’ You finally spoke up.

Instead of a response, she gave your hand a squeeze as a sign of encouragement to continue.

‘He had left town years ago and all these years I’ve been telling myself that I’m over it, and the stupid thing is that I thought that I was actually over it. But when I saw him on the day we debuted, I felt it. I had spent so many years suppressing the emotions and feelings that I had for him that the moment I saw him again I became overwhelmed. I was in love with him mom, and I think that I still am, which is so stupid of me. How can I be in love with someone who I’ve lost contact with for over ten years? And what’s even worse is that now my best friend is dating him. I feel like I’ve lost him all over again… but the ridiculous thing is that he wasn’t even mine to begin with, so why do I feel like I’m losing him?’

The next few days felt more relaxing, that was until you received a phone call from Manager Kim,

‘Chaejin told me that you haven’t answered her phone calls so I’m calling to tell you that Chaejin has a photoshoot with Jimin tomorrow and you need to be there.’

‘I thought our schedules were on hold.’

‘Yes, but there’s a clothing brand that wanted to use the two as models for their new clothing line.’

Great. They’re going to wear matching clothes and I have to watch?

‘But why do I have to be there?’

‘I’m only here to relay a message. If you have any questions, ask Chaejin herself or the CEO. I wouldn’t even have to be doing this if you would have just answered her phone calls. I’m going to pick you up tomorrow morning at 8 so be ready.’

Without giving you a chance to refuse, he quickly ended the call. You were once again left feeling defeated, and honestly pissed off. In most cases if you were told that you had an upcoming schedule, no matter how tired you were, you would have been happy, but this schedule was different, you were basically asked to watch Chaejin and Jimin together.

Are you fucking with me right now?

Needless to say, you had spent the entire night restlessly tossing and turning while dreading over the thought of having to see Jimin, and especially with the fact that having to see Chaejin meant that she would want to know why you were ignoring her phone calls.

Morning came much sooner than you wanted it to, and before you knew it, Manager Kim was knocking at the door. The manager had explained that Chaejin left early to get ready for the shoot, which for your part was good news since you weren’t quite ready to talk to her. By this point you weren’t mad at her anymore, but you still couldn’t shake this jealous feeling away.

The small talks during the initial car ride had died down, and you sat in silence while Manager Kim drove. Eventually you fell asleep while staring out the window and woke up to the manager nudging you awake. Just after he opened the passenger door to let you out of the car, Manager Kim said,

‘I know that you may feel uncomfortable with this situation but don’t forget that we warned you about letting your feelings ruin the group’s atmosphere. Okay?’

‘Okay.’ You agreed.

Manager Kim had always felt like a father figure to you, especially when being so far away from home. Although he was a man with few words, he always quietly took care of the group and never once had you heard him complain about of taking care of all the member’s needs. You knew that his best intentions were for the group to do well, so you made a mental promise to talk to Chaejin.

Once Chaejin saw you entering her dressing room, she ran up to you and wrapped you in a warm hug.

‘I’m so sorry Y/N. I knew that this was the only way that I could get you to see me.’ She mumbled into the hug.

Getting a whiff of Chaejin’s scent, you softened into the hug and suddenly realized just how much you missed your best friend. Although her dating scandal had caused some trouble for the group, Chaejin is indeed your best friend and you understood that just like how you needed to spend time back home, Chaejin probably needed her best friend during this time.

Finally letting go, you apologized,

‘I’m sorry that I didn’t answer you calls. I should have been there for you.’

Even though the company suggested everyone to not check the group’s social accounts, throughout the break you had signed onto the group’s Instagram and saw that though there were positive and supportive comments, there were also some negative and even offensive comments towards Chaejin that you hoped she didn’t notice. However, the sad smile that she gave you suggested that she probably already knew about the public’s criticism. After giving her hands a squeeze for support, Chaejin got changed into her first set of clothing while the make-up artist told you to sit down to get your makeup down.

When Chaejin was finally ready, the two of you walked out of the room hand in hand towards the studio where the photographer would explain the shoot’s concept to her. To your surprise, Jimin was already there and talking to the photographer. When he noticed you, he looked surprised but then quickly maintained an emotionless façade.

After Chaejin greeted the photographer, he happily explained the theme of the shoot, while you tried to your best to look at anyone and anything besides Jimin. Even after a year as an idol, you still found controlling your emotions and facial expressions to be a challenge.

Let the torture begin.

An hour into the shoot the photographer had announced that it was time for individual shoots with Chaejin going first. Knowing that Jimin would now have some free time, you quickly hurried out of the studio just in case he would try to engage in any kind of conversation because you were anything but ready for that. During the past hour Jimin had locked eyes with yours multiple times and you literally had to tear your eyes away from him just so your flushed cheeks could cool down. However, your plan clearly backfired when you noticed that Jimin was following you out of the studio. Shit.

‘Stop following me.’ You warned him while walking forward without much of a thought in mind.

Your brain was foggy. You couldn’t think straight. You had no idea where you were talking to, but the only thing that was for sure was the fact that you needed to get away from Jimin, because with him so close by, you couldn’t think straight.

But that was impossible. Every time you turned around, he was there. The faster you walked, the more quickly he sped until eventually he caught up and pushed you past the staircase doors.

‘Let go!’ You yelled as his grip tightened.

Sensing that he was hurting you, he immediately released his grip and apologized.

‘Y/N. I… I’m sorry. Let me explai-’

Vigorously shaking your head while blinking the sudden tears away,

‘No. NO. I don’t need this right now. I don’t need your apology. Not now. Not ever.’

*Click* *Click*

What?

You could have sworn that you heard the sounds of a camera taking a picture but when you looked around, there was no one.

Just as Jimin was about to speak up again, the staircase door suddenly opened. The two of you were greeted by Chaejin who looked just as surprise if not even more than you and Jimin.

‘Oh. Jimin. What are you doing here?’

Just seeing Jimin try to explain this current situation to Chaejin was souring your mood even more, so much to the point that it felt almost impossible to keep hide the anger that was fuming from within.

‘Fuck this.’ You mumbled before walking out of the door leaving the two alone.

I’m not dealing with this right now.

For the rest of the shoot you hid in the dressing room and didn’t say more than half a word to Chaejinor Jimin. Once it was all over, you quickly thanked and shook hands with the photographer before speeding to the company’s car hoping that you wouldn’t bump into anyone.

Thankfully Chaejin’s schedule was done for the day and you were headed back to the dorm because you needed nothing more than to just sleep off the bitterness feeling that’s been lingering since your encounter with Jimin and Chaejin.

You weren’t sure how long you ended up sleeping for but eventually you were shaken awake by someone, and with just a glance outside the window the dark skies hinted that it was perhaps still early in the morning.

‘What’s going on?’ You groaned rubbing your eyes that stung from tiredness.

‘What the fuck is this?’ Chaejin furiously asked while shoving her phone in your face.

It took your eyes a few seconds to adjust before you saw this article and gasped in horror.

[BREAKING] Dispatch reports a possible love triangle between BTS’ Jimin with Purple’s Chaejin and Y/N??

The article was filled with pictures of you and Jimin on the staircase was yesterday. Although the pictures couldn’t capture much, there were a few pictures that showed a tearful picture of you, and even a picture of the three of you. Suddenly you remembered the clicking sounds of a camera from yesterday. Someone must have been lingering around listening to your conversation with Jimin.

Holy shit. What have I done?

(Jungkook’s POV)

Jungkook froze when he was scrolling through the group’s twitter and found articles tagging their account.

Jimin and Y/N? What’s going on?

It was past midnight and he was sure that most of the members were asleep, but he couldn’t find the patience to wait until morning to ask Jimin. Instead, he quietly headed towards the elder’s room but quickly stopped with he saw that the lights in the kitchen were still on. With a few long strides, he saw that Jimin was sitting by himself at the dining table with a blank look on his face. Jimin must have been fixated in his own thoughts that he didn’t notice Jungkook’s appearance until the younger took the vacant seat next to him.

‘What’s wrong?’ Jungkook warily asked.

‘I…. I shouldn’t have talk to her. I shouldn’t have said anything. This wouldn’t have happened if I had just followed and done as I was told. I made a mistake.’

Jimin had spoken so quietly that if Jungkook sat any further, he wouldn’t have heard a single word. Just the sight of Jimin looking so disappoint and upset made Jungkook tear up.

What can I do to help? - (The Next Day)

Today was BTS’ last scheduled day before their long-awaited two-month holiday. After finishing the recording of their last BTS RUN episode for the current season, most of the members headed back to their assigned rooms to start packing for their own assorted vacation plans. Jungkook watched as Jimin silently walked back into his room without saying a single word. The latter had been staying in the same state the entire day, without saying much of a word, causing everyone around to worry.

Earlier in the morning Jimin was told to see Bang PD leaving the rest of the members to discuss the explosion on twitter about Jimin’s relationship with Chaejin and Y/N. While the members all knew that Jimin would never be the type of person to cheat on someone and that the scandal was simply a made up story, they knew that there had to be something that Jimin was hiding, however seeing how down he was feeling no one dared to speak up about it just yet.

Without another word, Jungkook quietly snuck into his room and scrolled into his phone until he found your number, a number that he stole from Jimin’s phone today while the elder went to the washroom.

The text message was brief, but not much words were needed.

‘Hi. It’s BTS’ Jungkook. I need you to open up my V-live in exactly 5 minutes. See you then.’

Not giving himself anytime for second thoughts, he quickly started his live on the app. He watched as the number of audience grew along with the amounts of hearts that were given, and did his best to answer and read the messages that many of the fans were posting. ARMYs meant the world to him, they were his light, they were his life, they were his everything, so he was unsure if what he was about to do next was correct or not.

‘Before I end this live, there is one thing that I want to ask here today. You have all greatly supported us throughout all these years and I’m hoping that nothing will change the bond that we share, so please be understanding with what I am about to say.’

After taking a deep breath to calm his shaking heart, he blurted out,

‘Y/N. Will you be my girlfriend?’

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