#sorry i am going through something rn | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sunmisbf · 30 days ago

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shim changmin

#IIIIIIIIIIIIII AINT SCARED OF ELECTRICITAAAYYYYYYY SO ITS OKAY! U SHOCK MEH MEH SHOCK! MEH MEH SHOCK!#nothing sexier than a man that can really sing my god #sorry i am going through something rn #.txt

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screechingfromthevoid · 5 months ago

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Orym growing his hair out while Dorians gone because he's not really taking care of himself makes for an EXCELLENT gay hair cutting fic

#silver sending stones #dorym #orym of the air ashari #dorian storm #the thought is #theyre reunited and dorian #because orym is roughly hand height #dorian runs his hands through oryms hair “without thinking”#and says “youre letting it grow? i thought you liked it short?”#and dorian wraps it in a fist and pulls a little bit #again “without thinking” (no for real dorian like playing with hair hense the long ass hair and he does not realize hes making oryn go RED)#and orym. through his blush. goes “i actually hate it. i just havent felt ... its been really ... it gets in my eyes? hard to look around”#“oh? im sorry i wouldnt have-” “no its okay. i didnt say anything”#“...do you want ne to cut it? im pretty good with a pair of sheers” “oh i ... normally just go at it until its short enough”#“oyrm. i mean this as kindly as i can. we can all tell. youre a handsome man. let me give you something thatll compliment your face”#lots of blushing. a lot of touching of the neck and throught the scalp #and depending on how I'm feeling #theyre probably not together #so orym is just sitting there radiating red while dorian is doing his best not to fuck up his hair #maybe a kiss at the end #maybe not #we'll see how desperate i am at episode 98 #we're just on e32 rn

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uhbasicallyjustmilex · 1 year ago

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oh my god oh my god oh my GODDDDDD i can’t BELIEVE i found these on my little rainy october thrift shop wander this morning. like, one would have been more MORE enough. but both?? at once??? i am quite simply floating and may never touch back down to earth

#obviously given that it was second hand i don’t know if alex’s autograph is legit #but from my (untrained and overly hopeful) eye it looks very much like it could be???#anyone who’s more expert in these things feel free to weigh in!!#and the photo book #aghhhhhhhhh #i have been wanting to get my hands on a copy for AGES #there’s something so special and atmospheric about matt’s photography that i’m just obsessed with #and to be able to actually look at them in physicality all together like that is truly something else #i also love that it’s designed like a passport obviously because of the whole album concept #but also because it truly does feel like a little glimpse into their world when they were making it #god what am i meant to do with the rest of my day after this??? 😭#(put the humbug album on and look through the photo book of course. and maybe even a little fic writing if my heart rate slows enough)#god bless whoever donated these and whatever luck allowed me to find them today 💜💜💜#i was in need of a bit of a pick me up and by god did this go above and beyond #sorry for how nonsensical all of this has probably been #i’m just #i’m feeling a lot rn 😭#arctic monkeys #alex turner #lulu posts

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lilworms · 2 months ago

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so

#last night was really so so so fun and it was super hard to get myself to go out? like #in the sense of I really wanted to because I knew it would be fun but I also knew my anxiety was eating me alive #and it would be an obstacle getting through that without alcohol and I need to be … careful #but I got fun drunk and didn’t have too bad of a hangover and didn’t feel super anxious once we got out :#and a different friend wants to make plans for tonight but I am really bad at making plans in advance because sometimes I physically can’t #do things after work bc tired bc neuro disorder and it’s frustrating to my friend with severe control issues #bc she needs to make specific plans like a week out and I’m like erm babe I can’t like #do that? and then if I don’t feel well day of and need to be home she gets (rightfully) frustrated because I’m bailing but it’s #challenging. and you don’t understand unless you live with it.#and it’s frustrating for us both. I don’t want her to think I don’t value her because I do and I force myself out often enough bc I #genuinely feel bad. but it’s so fucking hard sometimes . she also lives sort of far so going from work and having #to drive an hour to her place to then go somewhere and be out like #I’m spent before I even get there #friend I saw last night and I don’t talk consistently but when we do it’s always the same vibe and so fun and we just catch up about life #I feel like when I see my other friends they have things to always talk about because they’re in a discord call almost every night #I don’t have the energy!!!!!!!!!! like I’m so sorry that’s so much for me #idk she isn’t answering me now but if she wants to do something I need to know in the next hr bc if not I’m literally going to bed #I love her but there’s a disconnect between us rn and I don’t know how to mend that gap #but I do love her friendship so I’m just like. sigh #idk it would be different if she was closer and I know that #I hope getting back on medication helps get me being more social again. I’m just so tired this week that speaking is hard lol

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ratcandy · 7 months ago

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had a really epic cry on a balcony last week and I’ve been longing for that balcony ever since . Was so cathartic I need to go back there

#Never in my life have I felt more at odds with people around me and like I have no idea how to communicate #like a normal human being until this fucking trip #And I don’t know what I’m doing wrong but it just feels like. I am barely passing as a normal Person and people are Noticing #and the Noticing is making them Uneasy and therefore I am excluded from All Things #I need to get Diagnosed . With what I don’t know. But Something. Because something is fucking Wrong here #It’s making me reevaluate my entire everything because I feel so out of place it’s driving me insane #I feel like I’m sticking out like a sore thumb amidst a crowd and it’s doing something awful to me #How do I talk to people how do I exist with other people how do i. Do anything #and why is this only hard Now #I keep clamming up (lol) and going totally silent because I just feel like everything I’m saying is Wrong. Somehow.#But me being silent is also Wrong. And I’m doing something Wrong all the time #Uughhhrhb. This sucks. I need to get out of here. I need to get out of here. I need to get out of here #vent #delete later #clamtalk #Sorry for venting so much recently I am. Going through it rn. I promise I try not to do this often.

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caramel-mocha-latte · 1 year ago

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Hi hello!!! Sorry for the lack of posts recently, I've just been dealing with some pretty bad depression

And uhhh! I am currently unable to afford meds rn so I'm just gonna...

points at my $5 headshot commissions again

and even link my cashapp. Only $3 extra for a tiny on your shoulder now for my commissions! No charge for having a big hand patting your head or something cause it's actually easier to add than a tiny for me lol

https://ko-fi.com/mocha_latte/commissions

https://cash.app/$Astakoi

So uh.. if any of you want anything/just want to help me out, yeah I'd appreciate it a bunch!

Gonna try to get back into posting more art :> and do a few artfight things before the month ends

#hate to promo commissions or even ask for anything but uh... i am not super good without my meds and will not be paid until august 5th #some irl issues (one being my health lmao) + needing gas has me very broke rn though #commissions #donations #self promo #g/t #giant/tiny #g/t community #<- i still love drawing g/t stuff!#ooo i should draw tiny honkai star rail stuff-#anyway please feel free to commission g/t stuff! idm throwing a hand in the headshot somewhere or something to show size difference #wont get into detail on irl stuff so i understand if you guys dont want to donate anything!! and if you cant commission reblogging helps #not forced though #i do hate guilt trips a lot so im not gonna do that shit #my situation isnt life or death... worst comes to worst ill just get my meds when paid!#oh also going through some gender crisis stuff lol #anyway lol sorry for the tag ramble these posts make me nervous

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mbat · 2 months ago

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of all things in my au im putting mrs gleeful in a prominent role? so thats how my life is going

#my post #gravity falls #im working on my reverse relativity falls au rn #and i have NEVER liked 1:1 swap aus so im not making the handyman soos' grandma nor am i making the cashier manly dan #im also just not interested in writing about those characters ajfhshd sorry #fiddleford is the handyman in mine and. mrs gleeful is the cashier #ive just always found her interesting actually !!! we almost never see her and we dont even know her first name #but shes clearly been through so damn much ??? i know you could say all of the characters probably have but #idk she just stuck out to me #i was going over the list of gf characters to fill that role and i was like. fuck it. mrs gleeful #BUT she is not a romantic interest to either of the stan twins ok. i never liked that storyline even in the og show #but they all do still become friends of course #i think im gonna name her babs (short for barbara). why? because i couldnt think of anything better-#than naming her something ever so vaguely similar to buds name #but hes not really a factor in this story concept (yet?) so shrug #anyway yeah #mrs gleeful

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horiizonsstuff · 2 years ago

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guys I don't think I can nae nae anymore. S4 specials pls come out already I can't live like this anymore. I JUST WANT TO SEE MY HUSBAND AGAIN PLEASE 😭🙏‼️

CAN HE JUST SHOW UP IN MY DOORSTEP ALREADY RAAAAAAHHHHHHH,

this is my update that I'm not dead I am simply becoming mentally ill over some bird you don't get TTTE doodles for the month sorry 😔

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hexados-on-a-string · 1 year ago

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spectragus dont get enough credit for being a sun and moon ship but like. destructive sun and moon ship. sun and moon ship but they're the forces of nature the sun and moon actually are. the sun is harsh and relentless and unpredictable in its evil but also it's kindness, the moon is sharp and cold and cruel, a harsh light that doesn't allow you peace, but can also guide you, a light in the darkness. even on nights with a new moon, with no light in the sky, the moon is always reflecting the sun, and it'll be that way until they come to their end.

#spectragus give me a dopamine high that any sort of drug couldn't even come close to giving me #its the loyalty. its the seeing each other at their worst and still staying.#its the being the only person still around who knows and understands what youve been through #its the being so important to each other's characters that u cant mention one without recognising the impact the other has on them #i dont rlly do shipping unless its funny but also im a huge gus fan so like. yea. plus my view on romance is a bit all over the place anyway #something something my skrunkles deserve complicated relationships that are more than romantic but something else #its the trust thats the most important thing to me. trust and loyalty and devotion and #im sorry but i would have exploded if i like. didn't write down these thoughts #anyways fucked up gay people who are a package deal and that is a threat thats them #ik the majority of my posts are hee hee funnie and i usually dont take things too seriously #but these two have taken up part of my brain permanently since i was 8. like. they just live there. rent free.#i am like rabid rn. i am feral and i am insane and i am crazy and there are so many things wrong with me #i cant even write down all my fuckin thoughts there's so many my brain is going to Explode pray for me #idk if u understand how important it is to me the times they show kindness even while at their worst #they're not good people but they have people they care about and they care abt each other and that matters SO much #i take 0 criticism on my posts i only take cash. however there is no possible criticism to be made bc i am RIGHT #also this all kinda sparked from me getting obsessed with a certain kh character who has a connection to the moon #who is also one of my favourite characters ever #and if u know who it is and u also like him ur very cool #im not tagging this w character tags. im like. very shy. but #i love gus i love spectra i love spectragus #anyways see u next time where i should hopefully have art maybe potentially #i found the brushes i used to use back when i did lineless art so i am rlly happy

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ridiculously-over-obsessed · 8 months ago

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You know what mum forcing my hand to cancel my tattoo appointment because she wants to shaft me financially yet again is not okay and I am well within my rights to hate her, like genuinely I don't remember the last time I was actually happy to see her or spend time with her and I'm so fucking over living here.

#max rambles a lot #also with her now wanting more rent money a month then it's going to make saving to move out virtually impossible #she's trapping me here and she thinks i'm fucking stupid and won't see right through her #i hate it here so fucking much i just want to move out and i'm never going to be able to at this rate #i'm so ill rn #physically and mentally i am SO ill lately #also if you're waiting on a dm from me or something i'm sorry i have absolutely zero spoons rn #will get back to you tomorrow maybe??

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tvrningout-a · 1 year ago

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will y'all be mad if i reblog a fluffy meme or two (; ω ; )

#i've just been!! very anxious today and i'm trying to motivate myself to write #i have some things in my inbox already that i think i'll work on but it also just helps to reblog something that grabs rn me you know?#and i know i always tell y'all to take your time and to take care of yourselves first but i just feel so bad atm that i really am worried #someone's gonna be mad i'm reblogging another meme when my inbox is indeed bursting from unanswered stuff #and there's still starters i owe #like i don't even feel comfortable liking for interactions rn bc i know i'm so behind but!! then i feel like i'm not reaching out!!#my brain's going through it so i'm being silly and sensitive and i promise did not mean to vent asdfg sorry y'all #i'm gonna take a chill pill or try to at least :' )#get ready to ramble | ooc #tw vent

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serkonans · 10 months ago

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the way we handle medical leave in the states even for people with good benefits is cruel

#the number of hoops i have to jump through. the way that my requirements for one surgery are apparently different from another surgery #even though there's nothing in the paperwork to indicate any need for that and the surgeries don't differ all that much #the way that they lost my initial letter and now i'm up against my deadline next week and they haven't even told me what day next week #so i'm worried that it's literally tomorrow #the way i am not receiving ANY pay for an entire month because of all the delays so i'm having to live off my savings #the way that every single person i've talked to has said something different about what is and isn't required #the way that for a lot of this i had to be navigating it while high on painkillers immediately post-surgery #the way that the group my employer contracts through has two different emails and names and flips between them constantly #the way that my healthcare provider does it differently than every other healthcare provider so i need special forms from them #instead of the leave group but then the leave group doesn't seem to accept the forms that they send #the way that the doctors office has seemed incredibly confused by my requests #the way that the ROI office told me they'd send over a completed form and never did #the way i literally don't even know who to call next to try and sort this out or if it's possible TO sort out #like i guess i'll call the leave group tomorrow and cry and beg for an extension. i guess i'll grovel bc it's the difference #of getting a few thousand dollars or not and i can't just be like oh well guess i won't get my short term disability pay #especially bc none of the hospitals have billed me yet and i'm getting scared bc i don't know what my ER bill is going to look like #bc they did xrays and a CT scan and they gave me a splint and a sling and a lot of drugs #so i do need the money. just sitting here like. idek what to do lmfao.#not tagging this bc i'm on desktop and i can't do the accent mark easily and idk where my phone is rn sorry

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jeyneofpoole · 11 months ago

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the fifth time…ro are you okay.

NO!!!!!!! third time this MONTH!!!!!! i need to be SHOT!!!!!!

#asoiafmutuals this is not what you signed up for believe me i am so aware. and sorry.#i’m sort of going through something rn. obviously.

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whumpy-wyrms · 11 months ago

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I LOOOVE DRAWING I LOVE ART

#my hands are shakinf it’s hard to draw i hate this pencil #my favorite mechanical pencil i’ve been using for five years that i named Penny broke when i dropped them on the floor a few months ago and #i’ve been sketching with pens ever since because getting another pencil feels like i’m replacing Penny and i feel bad #i cried when penny broke they were my favorite pencil and now i have a new one but it’s not the same and im sad #this new pencil is absolute shit but buying another one feels like i’m betraying Penny im sorry Penny fuckficjcjff #i love drawing i love art i gotta get better at drawing animals plesplslsllss animals are so fun to draw but im shit at it #i literally don’t know what’s going on with me rn im so fucking hyper and im shaking and all i wanna do is draw draw draw my favorite blorbo #Aspen’s fursona but this pencil is SHIT #i srsly gonna get up and run around and scream right now but i CANT #dude i need wings to fly i fucking need wings right now i neeed a vampire and werewolf to bite me right now plewsersserrr #i’m gonna explode my mind is soooooo noisy #AAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAF DJDHSHHEHEJAKEHFJSKAHEHSJWHSGFJDJEHHWJW #i cannot take this #i need a tail to wag rn #i wanna howl at the moon but it’s DAY TIME AND IM AG SCHOOL #ahahahaha fuck my phones gonna die #i need silas to bite me and tear through my skin and rip me apart right now PLEASE #i don’t know what’s going onnn #why am i so WEIRD something has changed me #I LOVE HARLEY POEEE #my phones gonna get sent to the office if i keep this up #see ya later alligator 🐊🐊🐊🐊🐊#wyrms says stuff

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thehallstara · 2 years ago

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i gotta say. it is getting so damn hard as a disabled trans+queer jew with a shitty immune system to not feel completely overwhelmed w/ sadness and dread at every moment i'm sure a lot of yall feel the same but like man. idk how any of us are dealing with it at this point

#s.txt #it's just so... it feels like every part of who i am is under attack rn yk? and obv this is not a unique experience by any means #but everywhere i turn there's just such blatent antisemitism and dogwhistles and eugenics wherever i turn and i feel like i'm losing my min #and i'm missing pride again bc i super can't risk covid again and no one fucking gets it besides nat #but like!!! g-d it's so hard!!!#and i've had two different friends reach out to me this week being like i miss you and i'm like!! i miss you too but you don't really mask–#anymore and i don't do unmasked indoor stuff and every outing requires so many checks and balances for me to do and it's just hard #not to mention the guilt i have for like. not being there when things are under attack! it feels like i've abandoned my family #but like. in a lot of ways i've been abandoned first bc things are just not safe for me to participate in yk??#this is the longest rant i'm so sorry g-d #i'm going through it and i just really need something good to happen for me like PLEASE #i'll take a single thing skjdhks #chronic illness stuff

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pepprs · 2 years ago

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ok i took a nap sorry for miseryposting

#purrs #i don’t feel better per se but i do feel less angry so i think that’s good. but i did have a fucked up and disturbing dream so now im #focused on that a little bit but it’s whatever. i think i just feel stuck in my life and overwhelmed rn but i have to be gentle with myself #and okay with accepting outcomes that are compromises even if i really don’t want to. but idk. i have to think on it more. and i wish i felt #less lonely bc i KNOW i am not it’s just i have no emotional object permanence and i keep dismantling all my inoculations and then crying #out for more inoculations and i don’t know how to stop. and now im getting upset again typing this so I’m going to stop even though i havent #gotten to the end of my thought yet and like reblog some things or watch a video idk. i really need to find a counselor and speaking of #which i feel like someone told me lately (on here probably and ididnt reply im sorry) that my counseling place should give me referrals to o #other places and they didn’t and maybe it’s bc i told them i was taking a break from counseling but i am kind of like 😐😑. but i’ll figure it #out and find someone. i think there’s a thing i can do through work i just have to gather the spoons to actually do it and i spent all of th #them on the drivers manual today. also i read like half the drivers manual today! which is something to acknowledge. ok im done now bye

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