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sirsoggybread · 2 months ago

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smitten | spencer reid

spencer reid x bau!reader

summary: when an unsub is killing teenage couples, you and spencer have to go undercover to lure him out.

warnings: mentions of murder and violence, typical criminal minds case, kissing, allusions to a praise kink? (nothing freaky nasty tho), mentions of bugs and eating bugs (sorry.)

wc: 2k

a/n: criticism appreciated since im new to writing (esp x reader fics) pls be nice tho. hope you enjoy!

Spencer wasn't even sure how he got here. He tried to place it, recalling every interaction he's had with you since you joined the BAU, but he still wasn't sure when his crush had started to form.

Crush. He hated that. He hated calling it that because it made him feel like a child, but that's what it was, wasn't it? He was smitten for you.

Maybe, it wasn't one particular moment in which a switch flipped in his brain, and he decided to start imagining how his daily routine would change to include you. Maybe, when he first met you, you planted a tiny seed of curiosity in his heart that slowly grew to consume him.

He was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of your voice, "Hey, Doc, I gotta question for you."

His lips twitched into a smile, he loved that you appreciated his endless knowledge. You didn't brush him off like most people did. You listened to his rambles, you enjoyed his fun facts, you asked for more.

"Hm, what's up?" He hummed, stirring another spill of sugar into his coffee to distract himself from your eyes.

"I saw a video the other day of a girl talking about how there's cockroaches in our ground coffee... is that true?" You asked, tilting your head, your eyes locked onto his cup.

"Yes." He answered, bringing his cup to his lips and taking a sip, causing your nose to scrunch in disgust. He let out a chuckle at your cute expression. "It's not just cockroaches either, it's mostly beetles and weevils."

Your jaw fell slack, "You know this and you drink it?"

His lips pressed into a thin line as he suppressed his amused smile, "It's not uncommon for bug particles to get into most of the food we consume, but they're ultimately undetectable and unharmful. In fact, it's an added source of fiber. In some countries such as Japan, China, Indonesia, Mexico, and more, bugs are commonly enjoyed as a delicacy and appreciated for their nutritious benefits."

You nodded slowly in response to the influx of information. Your eyes locked onto the coffee pot, internally grappling with the prospect of bugs being in the next cup of coffee that you were most definitely still going to drink.

Spencer bit back an amused smile as he watched you struggle, his gaze lingered for a moment too long, before he decided he should probably find his desk again. He settled into his chair and glanced up from his report, watching as you tentatively sipped your freshly made cup of coffee.

Naturally, Derek caught Spencer staring, and couldn't resist the urge to tease, “What's going on between the two of you, lover boy?”

Spencer felt the heat creep up his neck, his shoulder's tensing, “What? Nothing.” He cringed, knowing he was quick to answer.

Derek chuckled, “Oh, really?” He challenged, “How'd you even know who I was talking about then?”

“Ooh,” Emily leaned against Spencer's desk, “Are we talking about Spencer's crush?”

If Spencer's face wasn't red before, it definitely was now. “It's not a crush.” He said adamantly.

“Denial.” Emily hummed, earning a chuckle from Derek. She continued to tease, “You know, JJ and I have a bet going on about this, you wanna get in on that?”

“Can everybody meet in the briefing room? We got a case.”

Spencer's shoulder slumped with relief as JJ rushed past them. It's weird to be relieved by a new case, but the teasing would come to halt, and he could focus on something other than the way your nose scrunched as you drank your coffee.

Everyone gathered around the round table, trading theories and observations as JJ presented the case.

“Unlike the previous murders, Benjamin and Gina both had ligature marks on their wrists, their bodies were also deeper in the desert than our first couple.” JJ zoomed in on the bruised wrists of the corpses displayed across the TV.

“He's escalating,” Derek stated simply.

You nodded in agreement, “Controlling two people at once isn't easy, even with the threat of a weapon. He’s applying what he learned from the first murders.”

“Perfecting his craft.” Rossi hummed, the disgust evident in his voice.

“One thing is for certain,” Hotch started, standing from his seat, “His time between kills is getting shorter, which means he's probably looking for another couple now. Wheels up in 20.”

–

Even as the team ate dinner, it was shitty fast food in the police station and your noses were buried in files. Spencer still stood, staring intently at the map pinned to the board in front of him, his brows knitted tightly together.

“Staring at the board isn't going to make the answer any clearer,” you said, familiar with his expression that crossed his face, “what are you thinking?”

“Tommy and Jane both lived in the south side of town, not far from the dumpsite, but Benjamin lived in the Northside, and Gina lived in the Northeast. Garcia couldn't find any connection between the two couples– different schools, different jobs, different friend groups. So… why these couples? Where is he finding his victims?”

You stopped in your tracks, recalling an earlier interview with the parents. His question struck a realization in you. “If you're 18 with super religious parents, where are you going to makeout with your boyfriend?”

“A makeout spot,” Derek interjected.

Spencer turned to face the team with a quizzical expression, “A makeout spot?”

“Yeah, yeah,” You answered, “Sometimes teenagers find secluded spots where they'll go to makeout or whatever. Then, they tell their friends, who tell their friends, so on and so forth.”

You turned to Hotch with a sense of urgency, “Is JJ still with Gina's friends?”

“I'm calling her now.” Hotch said, already holding the phone to his ear.

Derek’s eyes flickered between you and Spencer, his brow raised, “You realize what this means, right?”

“What?” Spencer asked.

Everyone's attention was on the two of you, you sighed, “It means you and I are going to have to go undercover as a couple.”

Spencer’s eyes widened, and he frantically shook his head, “What? Why- Why us? Why can't you two do it?” He gestured between Derek and Emily.

Emily deadpanned, though a smirk tugged at her lips.

“Come on, you really think Emily and I can pass as teenagers?” Derek asked, before adding, “I mean, I probably could, but Emily definitely can't.”

“Wha- Hey!” Emily slapped his shoulder lightly.

A stern look from Hotch caused four of you to quiet down. He hung up the phone and glanced between you and Spencer, “JJ just sent me the location. Are the two of you up for this?”

“Yes.” You answered quickly, your heart thumping with anticipation. This guy had killed four teenagers, you didn't even have to consider it.

Spencer swallowed, his eyes flickering over each member of the team, all focused on him. He wanted to kiss you, be close to you, but this isn't how he wanted it to go. “Yes,” he sighed.

–

Spencer sat stiffly in the backseat of the beat down car. His ears were tinted pink, and he couldn't even blame it on the wind drifting through the cracked windows–damn, Arizona, and their warm weather.

“Should we um, should we lay down?” He asked, fidgeting with his hands.

“No,” you answered, “we don't want him to find us in any more of a compromising position than we'll already be in.”

Spencer swallowed, and nodded. “So, um…”

“Spencer, relax.” You coaxed, but he couldn't. He was supposed to kiss you, and touch you, and the whole team was listening, and you guys were about to get attacked by a serial killer. Ironically, that last one was the least nerve-wracking.

“Just don't think.” You guided his hands to your waist, “I will do all the kissing and touching, and I'll stay on high-alert. Just… try to relax, and… make sounds.” Even your cheeks grew warm at your last words.

He was about to ask what you meant by make sounds, but he was caught off by your lips pressing against his–well, sort of. You kept your thumb hidden between your mouths, so your lips never completely touched. Spencer was grateful for that, it made the scene feel less intimate.

The two of you stayed like that for a while, Hotch occasionally giving you updates through your ear piece.“We have eyes on someone, but we can't move in until we're sure it's the unsub.”

You sighed, knowing the unsub wouldn't approach until he was sure the two of you were too caught up in each other to notice him.

You moved your head next to Spencer's ear, and his breath hitched at the sensation of your warm breath on his neck.

“This okay?” you asked in a hushed tone.

“Mhm,” He hummed, forcing his shoulders to relax, and willing his head to fall to the side. He understood what you meant by ‘make sounds’ now, because the moment your lips met his neck with wet kisses, a gasp escaped his lips.

“That's good, keep doing that.” you hummed against his neck, his grip on your waist tightened as his mind started to blur. He knew you meant the noise was good because it would convince the unsub, but the praise still caused an embarrassing amount of heat to pool in his stomach.

“Suspect is approaching.” If Aaron's voice through the earpiece wasn't enough to pull him out of the haze, the car door opening, followed by a rush of footsteps definitely was.

Emily's voice rang out, “FBI, you are under arrest for the murder of Thomas Buros, Jane Martin, Gina Amato, and Benjamin Cohen.”

You could still hear Emily reciting the Miranda rights as she pulled the unsub away from the car. Hotch poked his head in, “Are you guys okay?”

“Fine,” Spencer mumbled, his heart still racing from the array of events that unfolded.

You nodded, “Yeah, we're good.”

“We're taking him back to the station. We're not anticipating for him to request a lawyer, so Rossi's going to lead the interrogation. You two are good to head to the hotel for the rest of the night.”

–

Hotch was right, he never requested a lawyer, and it didn't take long for Rossi to get him to confess. The next morning, the team was on a flight back to D.C.

Things had been awkward between you and Spencer. Well, Spencer had been awkward, and the teasing from the team was relentless.

So, you waited. You let him sit as far as possible from you on the jet and you waited until everyone had drifted off into sleep, before finding a spot next to Spencer.

You gently nudged him out of his sleep. He inhaled deeply, and rubbed his eyes as he came to, and his cheeks flushed instantly upon seeing you. He swallowed as he sat up, his pulse began to race, anticipating the conversation he was sure you were going to insist on having.

Instead, you held out a square lollipop, with a scorpion encased in the center of the transparent, red candy.

His brows furrowed, “What? What is that?”

“It's candy,” You smiled, “they had them at the corner store near the hotel, so I got it for you.”

His lips curled into a curious smile as he accepted the candy, and began inspecting it.

“Bugs are commonly enjoyed as delicacies and appreciated for their nutritional benefits.” You echoed back to him a part of your earlier conversation, and he let out a chuckle. Now it made sense.

“Well, I think the uh, candy casing might be a little counterproductive.” He commented, his lips pursing as he suppressed his amused smile, “You didn't get one for yourself?”

“Oh, no. I will have to pass on the uh, scorpion. I prefer my bugs to be undetectable.” You said quickly, earning a laugh from Spencer. His anxiety over the impending conversation seemed to dissipate.

He unwrapped the candy and stuck it in his mouth, causing your nose to wrinkle. Suddenly, he felt like he was right back where he started–his stomach fluttering as you looked at him with an amused gleam in your eye, and his heart swelling as you referenced your earlier conversation. You listened, you remembered, and you thought of him enough to buy him this piece of candy (in his favorite flavor too.)

Yes, he was definitely smitten, but then again, maybe you were too.

#criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid smut #matthew gray gubler #matthew gray gubbler x reader #mgg #mgg x reader #criminal minds fanfiction

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woniedarlin · 4 months ago

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He listens while you yap

pairings: boyfriend! enhypen x reader | listener x yapper trope

caution: be prepared for their randomness (•‿•)

author's note: This is my first time trying something like this, and I thought, why not switch things up? If you enjoyed it and want more like this, just let me know! Happy reading!

permanent tag list: @sol3chu @chlorinecake @13tter @jung1w0n

HEESEUNG

You explained an article you found earlier and made an especially interesting point. “So, apparently, there’s this theory about how—wait, are you even listening?” you paused mid-sentence then glancing up at Heeseung.

He was just staring at you the entire time.

“Am I talking too much?” you asked, feeling embarrassed. Was he bored? You might have been talking for hours...well, you were.

��I’m sorry,” you added. Feeling guilty.

Heeseung tilted his head slightly. His lips formed a gentle smile that quickly made you feel comfortable. “No, not at all. I’m just listening,” he said gently. “You always have the most interesting things to say.”

You blinked. For a moment, you were caught off guard by his words.. “Really? Because I’m pretty sure I’m just rambling about random stuff half the time.”

He chuckled softly while shaking his head. “Not to me. You make even the most ordinary things sound extraordinary. Like you’re breathing life into them.”

“Come on, that’s a bit much,” you teased though you were shy with his words.

He shook his head slowly. “It’s not. You could talk about the lifespan of jellyfish, and I’d still want to hear every word.”

You laughed. “Seriously? Jellyfish?”

“Yup,” he said with a grin. Heeseung’s eyes crinkling at the corners. “I don’t think you realize how much I enjoy hearing you talk.”

You looked at him for a moment. Your laughter turned into a warmer feeling. “You always know how to make me feel special, right?”

Heeseung smiled more. “I’m just telling the truth. You’re the one who makes everything feel special.”

Your heart swelled at his words, and you couldn’t help but grin. “You’re too good at this, you know. No wonder everyone’s always talking about how sweet you are.”

He lightly shrugged. “Only for you.”

JAY

You plopped down next to Jay on the couch, “Last night, I dreamed I was a bottle of ketchup,” you said, not even glancing at him.

Jay didn’t even look up from what he was doing, though you knew he was listening. “Oh?”

“Yeah. And you were mustard. Which is weird because you’re usually mayonnaise in my dreams.” You said it matter-of-factly.

Jay glanced over at you and gave a small smile. Your boyfriend didn’t even question it anymore.

“Mhm. We were sitting on a picnic table, minding our own business,” you continued, staring blankly ahead. “Then this kid comes over, grabs you, and squeezes you all over a hot dog.”

“Of course,” Jay muttered, his smile still there.

“And then they grabbed me and put me on french fries,” you said, your voice now lighter. “But even though we were on different foods, we ended up on the same plate.”

Jay gave you a soft look. “Of course you did.”

“Yup. It’s like… no matter what, we always end up together,” you said nonchalantly. “Even if we’re on different things, we’ll always end up on the same plate.”

Jay didn’t react much, just looking at you with that same fond smile. “Ketchup and mustard, huh? That’s one way to put it.”

“Yep.” You nodded as if you were completely confident in the analogy. “It’s like fate, you know?”

Jay leaned back. “Fate. Of course. You’re the ketchup, and I’m the mustard.”

“Exactly,” you said, kicking your legs a little. “I mean, I’m obviously the star of the show, but you do make a good sidekick.”

Jay laughed quietly to himself, shaking his head. “You’re the star, hm?”

“Of course,” you said, completely unfazed, “but you still belong next to me.”

“Right,” Jay replied with a small, affectionate smile. “Next to you, always.”

And just like that, he continues to look at you with the same smile as you continue to talk, absolutely in love with you.

JAKE

You were pacing around the room, hands gesturing wildly as you went off about the movie you’d just watched. “And don’t even get me started on the plot twist—like, I saw it coming from a mile away! But, still, how could they—ugh, I can’t wrap my head around it!”

Jake sat on the couch with one arm stretched across the backrest. “Go on, tell me more,” he said, his voice smooth and teasing.

“Okay, but can we talk about that scene? The main character falls—of course—and she’s like, ‘Save yourself!’” You rolled your eyes dramatically. “Like, girl, what? Just get up! Run with your friend! Why are you making it so dramatic?”

“Mhm,” he hummed, clearly holding back a laugh.

You kept going, utterly oblivious to his gaze. “I mean, realistically, if I fall, I’m grabbing your arm and dragging you down with me. We’re both going down. There’s no ‘save yourself’ moment. You’re coming with me.”

Jake chuckled, shaking his head. “Good to know.”

“And the friend?” you continued, throwing your hands up. “She’s just standing there, like, ‘Noooo!’ for too long. Like, hello? Help her up and run!”

Jake leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “You’d definitely survive in a movie.”

“Oh, absolutely,” you said, pointing at him. “I’m not wasting time with emotional goodbyes. We’re both making it out, or no one is.”

Jake grinned, his voice dropping just slightly. “So, you’d save me?”

You froze for a second before narrowing your eyes. “Obviously. I’d even ensure you didn’t trip in the first place.”

He laughed softly. “And here I was, thinking you’d be the one tripping on purpose just to get me to catch you.”

Your jaw dropped. “I would NOT!”

Jake smirked. “You totally would.”

“I’d be saving both of us!”

“You’re hot,”

You froze. “What?”

“You heard me,” he said.

Of course, he had to flirt.

You crossed your arms tighter, fighting back a smile. “Okay… what? That’s random. You’re distracting me.”

“That’s kind of my thing, isn’t it?” Jake grinned wider, tilting his head. “Admit it, baby.”

You shook your head with a sigh. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” But the way your heart fluttered at his words? You couldn’t deny it.

SUNGHOON

You paced around the room as you got lost in recounting the day. “And I visited my parents today! I missed them so much…it was the best.”

Finally, you stopped mid-stride and turned to face him, hands on your hips. “Okay, are you even listening? Or are you zoning out again?”

You have seen your boyfriend zoning out often, especially in the mornings. You wouldn’t be surprised if today were one of those days.

But he chuckled softly, wanting to assure you. “I’m listening. I always do.”

You tilted your head. “Even when I’m rambling about stuff that’s probably unimportant?”

“Especially then,” he said, his dimples appearing as his smile grew wider. “I like hearing you talk. It makes me happy.”

Your arms crossed, though you couldn’t fight the grin pulling at your lips. “You like when I yap on and on?”

“Not the yapping part,” Sunghoon teased. “It’s the way you’re so happy when you talk. You’re glowing, and I can’t look away.”

That made your cheeks heat up. “I’m just telling you about my day.”

“I know,” he said softly. “But you light up when you talk about the things you love. I could listen to you all day. It’s comforting.”

“Comforting?” you echoed, raising an eyebrow. Oh?

He nodded as his eyes began to soften. “Yeah. It’s like you’re letting me see a part of you no one else does.”

Your lips curved into a smile. “I never thought I’d be comforting while going on about my life.”

Sunghoon’s smile grew. “You’d be surprised.”

SUNOO

“…and I don’t even know why they didn’t just say that in the first place! Would it have been so hard? Honestly…” you trailed off, glancing at Sunoo, watching you with the softest smile.

You blinked. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?” he asked, his smile widening.

“Like you’re completely entertained by my nonsense.”

“Because I am,” Sunoo admitted without hesitation. “I love it when you yap.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Yap?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “You go off about the most random things, and I love it. It’s my favorite background noise.”

You playfully gasped. “Background noise? You’re saying I’m noise?” How dare he?!

“Sweet noise,” he corrected, grinning cheekily. “The kind I never want to tune out.”

You rolled your eyes, but there was no hiding the blush on your cheeks. “So you want me to keep going?”

Sunoo nodded eagerly. “Of course! Why do you think I never interrupt you?”

Tilting your head, suspicious. “What if I talk about like….I don’t know... talk about socks?”

He laughed softly. “You don’t realize how cute you are when you get all caught up in your little stories.”

You tried to fight the smile tugging at your lips but gave up quickly. “Fine. But you’re stuck with me talking forever.”

Sunoo’s eyes sparkled. “Lucky me.”

JUNGWON

You were sprawled on the carpet while Jungwon sat next to you, quietly listening with that ever-patient expression.

“…and I don’t get it! Why would you even bring a cat to a grocery store? What’s the cat gonna do? Pick out your produce?” You threw your hands up, exasperated. “Next thing you know, they’ll be pushing their pets in carts like it’s totally normal.”

Jungwon blinked at you. You can see his lips twitching.

You squinted. “You’re holding back a laugh, aren’t you?”

“No,” he said, lips pressed together tightly.

“Yes, you are!” You pointed at him accusingly. “You’re trying so hard not to laugh right now.”

He cracked. His shoulders shook as he let out a small giggle. But then it escalated. His hand flew to his stomach, and he was laughing so hard that he tipped backward.

“HAHAHAHAHA OH MY—AHHHH HA HA HA HA!”

You sat there, wide-eyed. “Is it that funny?”

He nodded, tears forming at the corners of his eyes as he tried to catch his breath. “It’s not even the story! It’s you! You’re so serious about the ridiculous things—AHHH HA HA AHH HAHA—I can’t!”

You crossed your arms, pouting. “I was making a valid point.”

“I know, I know!” Jungwon wheezed, wiping his eyes. “But you looked so offended! Like, personally attacked by the cat in the store.”

“Well, someone had to say it!”

Jungwon shook his head. “You’re too much.”

You huffed. “I don’t know why I put up with you.”

“Because you love me,” he teased, his laughter finally calming down.

You rolled your eyes but smiled despite yourself. “Maybe.”

“Definitely,” he said, still grinning. “Now, please. Keep going. I need another good laugh.”

NI-KI

You were going on about how your day went, and Ni-ki, leaning against the doorframe, watched you as he kept grinning. He wasn’t saying much but teasing you with every detail you mentioned. “Wow, you don’t stop talking, huh?” Ni-ki said with a smirk.

You raised an eyebrow. You do not want to back down. Especially to him. “I’m just sharing my day, okay? You don’t have to listen if it’s too much.”

“Oh, I’m listening,” Ni-ki said as he stepped forward. “I just didn’t know you had this much to say. You’ve been talking for hours, baby.”

You shot him a look, unfazed. “Oh, please. You know I talk plenty, just not to you.”

Ni-ki chuckled, pushing himself off the doorframe and walking over to you. “I think you talk to me more than you realize. You just don’t want to admit it.”

You scoffed, crossing your arms. “I don’t know about that.”

“Uh-huh. You’re giving me the full lecture today. You can’t hide it,” he teased. “And honestly, I’m enjoying it.”

You rolled your eyes, trying to act indifferent. “Of course you are; you love it when I talk.”

Ni-ki shrugged dramatically. “Guilty as charged. Your yapping is one of my favorite things. Keeps me entertained.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at how easily he could get under your skin, even with his teasing. “Well, I hope you’re ready for more because I’m not stopping anytime soon.”

“Bring it on,” Ni-ki said with a wink, clearly looking forward to hearing all of it.

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nicoliine · 1 year ago

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About the times when Alastor touched you and when he expected you to do it back.

☆彡 How in the world does the radio demon, who doesn't really like physical contact, end up looking for any excuse to have his hands on you?

☆ Reader is g/n; no pronouns or y/n are used.

☆ Warnings: not really. Does a mental breakdown count as a warning? Alastor is a warning itself yk.

☆ English isn't my first language, so if there's any mistake I sorry-

You noticed that Alastor didn't like people's proximity when you first arrived at the hotel and he didn't even try to shake your hand. There, with your hand on the air, you stand waiting for his shake as you observe his ramblings about a whole different subject—not that you mind about all the weird souls that can be met in hell—watching him around the other hotel staff, you confirm it.

After a couple of days in the hotel and witnessing his power display, you made a mental note to not mess with him. That being said, you didn't really want to touch him.

You were a very touchy person, content to hug Pentious when you first saw him around in the morning or cuddle on the couch with Angel before he started to make a lewd comment about his job and you just ended up leaving him alone. Nifty seemed to enjoy being all over you, sitting on your shoulders while you were reading or just playing with your hair.

Another one who was happy about your touchy personality was Charlie, but she is just happy about everything.

☆◦•◦☆

It started a month from your arrival.

Alastor, being a self-proclaimed gentleman, didn't seem to be aware of your not touching Alastor rule, he started holding the door open for you then creating a shadow to lift up that heavy box that you needed to move, and you ended up—it was hard for you—just trying to move up your body away so you didn't end up too close to him, but he seemed to love your personal space so much.

One time, you were in the hallway, not really aware of your surroundings, until you felt an arm around your shoulders. When you heard his static voice, you froze on your steps, slowly turning your head to see him there, standing with that so-known smile of his. When he started to walk, still holding you, talking about that great idea for the hotel, you just couldn't pay so much attention. Your mind is running on thoughts about his proximity.

This wasn't the only time he ended up having you close to him; being honest, it seems to have a personal liking to your presence. You doubt he was like that before your arrival (as you already spoke with Charlie about it), but he could be found anywhere you were. If you ended up helping fix the balcony fence, he was there behind you—you're glad he's at least silent—or when you are in the bar just scrolling through your phone and he is watching you from the other side of the room, not wanting to be near your technology artifacts, is he just trying to drive you mad? Even though that look of his seems to be asking for something you don't know, you won't ask what it is. Just wait to see how it goes.

His touch soon became more frequent. You often end up with your own theory that it's something involuntary, like something he doesn't even notice by the way it feels, like deep in the end he just wants to be touched but don't know how to ask for it. But with that demon, nothing is sure; everything he does used to be planned. That's why you found yourself confused and don't want to test your luck.

When you are in the lobby in the middle of one of Charlie's activities and his arm ends up holding you by his side.

Or when he just kisses the back of your hand every time you first see him in the morning and every time he leaves, no exceptions, that confusing look of his is always there.

Just about that, your hands—he often takes your hands. While you are in the kitchen and waiting for the pasta on the stove, one of your hands is resting on the counter as you hold a recipe book, reading the next steps. He's by your side the whole time; one of his hands takes your free hand, making you pause your reading and look at him in surprise for the sudden action. He says nothing, and both of you are standing there in silence until you have to go back to cook. However, he doesn't seem to want to let you go yet because he will follow you as you move around the kitchen.

From them, it seems that everyone is aware of this weird Alastor thing.

Nobody talks about it though—you are surprised as they have stayed out of the subject, just making silent bets about the cause of this behavior of his—but you know it wouldn't take long for someone to talk about it.

☆◦•◦☆

The last time he put his hands on you, you were scared. So much has passed since the last time you felt this way. Anxious and terrified, everything around you was spinning; you had to run away from the hotel activities all day.

When Alastor found you in your room, you were a mess, all your stuff scattered around the room. You saw him from your seat in a corner on the other side of the room; the only candle in the nightstand seemed to be dead soon. He just stood there in front of you; you didn't even try to look up at him, just his shoes. You can tell so much about someone else by his shoes; his shoes seemed almost perfectly clean even after destroying his enemies. He's such a collected person that it scares you.

"Why, dear, would you look at me?" Alastor surely doesn't enjoy being ignored; you know that. You just couldn't find the strength to move when he spoke to you. It passed almost 5 minutes before you turned your head up, and he was so patient with you the whole time. "What is that troubling your mind, dear?"

You didn't respond right away; you're not sure how much time passed until you did it.

"It's just... everything." Your hands run around your face as you try not to have an attack right away in front of him. "I'm so scared, Alastor."

He just smiled; nothing was said; he didn't even try to touch your shoulder or hold you; he just smiled with that now so common smile of his, —you could swear it was the biggest smile you had seen on his face —one of his arms extended to you.

You have no idea why you did what you did; maybe he asked you directly, or you imagined it all, or his eyes showed what he wanted, or the candle in your room was one of Angel's drugs, or you just simply had a death wish. You don't know.

But you hugged him—just a hug—so hard that you could break his bones. When you took conscience about what you were doing, you tried to back down, not knowing how he could react to your contact.

But he didn't let you; his arm took you by the waist, and his staff was forgotten on the ground when he held your head against his shoulder.

You now understand why he always touched you. While you hands grabbed fists of his coat, he held you so tight, like it wasn't enough, and you just needed to be closer to him forever; he didn't want anything else.

So he did, he didn't let you go for a single moment that night; even when you were in bed, he held your hand the whole time. He just let you go the next morning when Vaggie insisted he needed to go do his job, even so he wouldn't forget to kiss your hand before he left. The ghost of his touch accompanied you all the time; it was like your body grew so used to his presence and his touch that you could feel it as a part of you.

Touch Starved! Alastor folks!!! Alastor is such an interesting character to write! I want ro respect him so bad.

Likes and reblogs are appreciated 💞

#alastor x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel #istg this man smells like wood and coffee #nicolines

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toxycodone · 11 months ago

Text

Laios x Beastkin!Reader

an. Senshi, Chilchuck, and Marcille x Reader are mentioned quiiiite a bit in here. Izutsumi x reader is more sparse. split between furry/scaly/feathery beastkin after the more general ones in the beginning. SORRY if the formatting is weird I got "text limited" a lot on this lmfao

this is a lot so. <3 show sum luv

general sfw

when you two first meet...bro is ELATED. He knows Izutsumi, which is fine, but you're an entirely different one. Who also doesn't seem to be super against him getting to know them

He asks SO many questions. What are you mixed with? Are you naturally born or artificial? What's it like having wings? A tail?

He's testing out all your features. He loves them so much.

When there's downtime, he likes to conduct "research". This goes for analyzing your features and making notes, comparing them to his books and other notes, and even more intricate tests like reaction time and stuff.

He'll hold a candle/torch by your face and test your pupil dilation. It's oddly intimate because he's just staring you down and its like. okay. are we gonna kiss orrrr

Loves. Loves. Loves just WATCHING you. Seeing the way you pounce on little bugs for fun or get spooked by certain noises. He just smiles and is all amused.

You'll catch him doodling you pretty often. He makes notes like "y/n caught a treasure bug today. They seem pretty skilled at hunting. Failed to kill it for some reason...just played with it until it scurried off." The doodles are like...surprisingly pretty decent. The monster portions of you are the best looking and most detailed. But it's so cool to see just how much he pays attention to you and your idiosyncrasies.

Your interactions with Izutsumi also interest him. Do you guys get along? Are you prey to her? Or is she to you? If you and Izu are talking or around each other he's watching like a hawk out of pure curiosity.

However...there's a particular page in his journal where he's providing feedback on how he would make you "better" aka cooler. It's basically just his own ramblings. No Laios, an extra set of eyes and the ability to breath fire and ice and everything in between is not. better. you're just salivating over the idea of your monster OC

If you bring this up to him he actually agrees. After a lot of note taking and observation he's really fascinated just on how well suited your entire existence is to...surviving. He has a lot of theories he'd love to share about you.

But he has e x t e n s i v e notes on your body. It's something that fr makes you blush because, why is he theorizing about the base of your tail and how it connects to your spine? and the number of nipples you have? wait...how is his guess right...?

But Laios is so useful. You might as well call him your owner. You don't have to lift a finger when it comes to taking care of yourself. (He misses his dogs so you fill in.)

He takes care of your skin/fur/scales/feathers, cuts your claws, helps you file down your hooves or horns. He's very into taking care of you if you'll let him. (Marcille also hops in on this since its her love language LOL. When she's not busy with Izutsumi she helps when she can.)

If you are like...afraid of water or don't enjoy bathing. You are like the party's pet. They're debating on how to get you clean before Chilchuck is like "if you don't take a bath I am going to kill you and throw you in there myself." Laios then goes all puppy dog eyed bc he thinks Chil is being to hard on you and then he sighs and is like "fine. I'll buy you a treat when we get back to the surface."

Marcille/Laios are really good when it comes to bath time. They aren't weird about it (Laios is checking you out but. In a curious type of way. Marcille is giving him side eye if hes getting too...Laiosy. But he respects your boundaries. Just imagine Laios happily scrubbing you while humming a tune awe.)

And when it comes to sleeping arrangements...you can alternate between anyone in the party. But Laios and Chilchuck are your best bets. Marcille is an excellent sleeping partner if the dreams don't bother you, shes soo happy to have you sleep with her and she's soft and smells nice.

Laios happily lets you sleep with him. He's actually not super cuddly (unless you are he'll reciprocate). But he is very much like, giving you a ton of space. If you fall asleep before him he just relents and sleeps as comfortably as he can around you lol. Literally just like any other pet owner.

Chilchuck....sleeping with him is difficult bc Izutsumi will fight you on it, but she relents if you can fit in without much issue (bonus points if you're warm) so. You guys can both overheat this poor man. Izu may even start cuddling with you more. She finds a lot of comfort in having another beastkin in the party even though she won't say it.

And speaking of Chilchuck...you're likely a bit more cooperative than Izutsumi, so he gets your help when it comes to checking for traps and finding treasure. With your elite hearing and other abilities, he's actually really pleasantly surprised how useful you are. (If you were a half-foot he'd definitely want you in his guild). He gives you pets and treats when the others aren't really paying attention (He doesn't want them to see him doting on you is all LOL).

Okay. So. Your diet. This is an anime about eating so. Let's get down to it.

Whether you're a herbivore, carnivore, or omnivore--Laios is ENSURING your needs are taken care of in the party. It is of upmost importance to him.

He takes notes and asks about how certain foods make you feel. Are you more energized? Less energized? Stomach hurting? Pooping well? (Will ask this with upmost sincerity, he wants to make sure the butter/milk/etc used in their cooking isn't interfering with your tummy. Whether you want to answer this is up to you lol).

Laios and Senshi happily adjust things to your needs. Laios will spend time foraging with you, Senshi will find certain monsters with more nutrients that meet your needs. Senshi is also like, really knowledgeable about nutrients, so sometimes in your food he may grind up shells or bones to meet calcium needs and such. When he cooks he'll give you bones or soften them up in water so you can eat the marrow. :-)

Senshi...is the coolest though. He also lets you perch on him (like Izutsumi) and since he's lived in the dungeon for so long, he knows a lot about monsters firsthand. If it applies, he'll give you tips about yourself or some monsters you should prey on. Senshi and you go on little foraging trips too. He'll have you sniff things out in return for extra food during dinner.

Laios likes to see you hunt prey and eat it raw, though. Everyone else would rather not and it makes them sick but he thinks it is SO cool. He honestly wishes he could do that. He takes hunting lessons from you and will give you tips on being stealthier and such.

Your teeth really fascinate him. He likes testing your bite strength on different types of material (Like wood, stone, bones, etc.). He'll stick his fingers in your mouth and admire them if youd let him. He gives you so much praise in general its so cute.

AND. PETTING YOU. He is so tactile if you let him (i mean look how much he tries and fails to pet izutsumi). When you give him the all clear he is like. jumping for joy. he LOVES to pet you and praise you. He absentmindedly pets you when hes sitting down or standing by you. And when you nuzzle into his touch his heart SOARS. You can see on his face he's blushing and has that like. excited wiggly smile <3

I think when he's just sitting around he just messes with your tail. He likes it.

Lay down beside him and he will happily pet you and be like "do you like this? Is this a good spot?" Present. Your belly to him. and he is over the moon. He pets you wildly and is like "Who's a good boy/girl/monster?" He is so unashamed about doing this too. Chilchuck would put a stop to it if you didn't like it so much.

If you give him kisses or tongue bath's he's eating that shit up (i mean. look at those extra comics w him and dogs he lets dogs just kiss all over his face omfg). He isn't a huge fan of getting his hair wet (sensory issue) but when it's your drool...he can't help but be excited. Laios is all like "they're grooming me?? this means they like me, right??? Can I officially say I befriended a monster???"

It's proof that you care for him and view him as apart of your pack...he is just over the moon at this.

I will say...Laios is way too "has no backbone with you" for a while. You're chewing shoes? You can't help it! Stealing snacks? It's instinctual! Playing too rough with Izutsumi? C'mon guys...

But when he notices his party actually getting upset. You will be surprised how he can put his foot down. Not even max puppy eyes work on him. He will leash and muzzle you if needed.

But you can always get away with messing with his stuff. He thinks its fun to chase you around when you got his shirt in his maw. Then he happily wears the torn up gear and Marcille is like "let me sew it..."

For Scaly Beastkin:

He's so helpful when it comes to shedding season. Laios finds nice rocks all the time and helps scrape off any patches that are drying and crusting and hes not even phased and doesn't think its gross at all. He would keep some skin to test its resilience if you let him.

And going with that, when you need to shed and soak he would help you find a place and will happily assist with the shedding. He's so excited to be there honestly. But he feels bad you are uncomfortable so he lets you cuddle up under the water with him while you wait for your shed to soften up <3

Laios runs his fingers over your scales absentmindedly...just loves feeling how smooth they are, especially after he spent so much time helping them maintain that pristine smoothness.

He gets Marcille's help to make a moisturizing ointment to put on you every now and then so you don't get to dried out in the dungeon!! Marcille starts to fret about that too. You're just kinda chillin and she'll reach over and put ointment on your hands/cheeks/tail. Just areas you may be susceptible to drying out.

Also...he lets you use him as a heating rock. Sunshine is really limited in the dungeon, so...when you need a warm up he's there and waiting and extremely excited to warm you up with a hug.

For Furry Beastkin:

Brushes you. He'd do this EVERY evening (and morning) if you let him. He takes notes, too. Do you have an undercoat? Or is it just one? What does this mean about what environment you originated from?

He probably tries to use your shed fur to embellish his own clothes or put in his pillow/blankets. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle I guess?

And to add to that...remember how Marcille made a cute little cat head from Izutsumi's fur? He does that too. He and Marcille make cute little shapes outta your shed and giggle together about it.

If you get fleas...he is the party member you should tell. He'll help you get rid of them and won't rat you out to the other members LOL. He'd probably blame himself if it spread and the rest of the party is like "you expect us to beleive. you got fleas. Laios you would be excited if you got them."

For Feathered Beastkin:

Preening....<3. When you have pin feathers he is so sweet and gentle. gently picks them out. It kinda tickles bc he's just gliding his fingers over your wings. You'll catch him sighing in content and burying his face in the softness. It's so sweet.

He collects your feathers and shows them off to Marcille (who also really likes them.) Your down is SO useful too. The party has the softest blankets and pillows thanks to you. When you're molting everyone is calling dibs on the feathers to stuff in their bedding.

Laios examines your wingspan and is really interested on stuff like weather you can fly or not. If you can, he's in awe. He wants to see it. Maybe even fly with you if he can. Its always been a dream of his to do that.

nsfw

tw (for nsfw). monsterfucking? if that counts. mentions of vent/cloaca/knot

This man. It is so easy to tell overtime just how fucking horny he gets over monster stuff. He is addicted to just how much you differ from him. Your scales, fur, feathers, wings, etc....he thinks they're all extremely sexy.

He just loves the primal aspect of it? Like you act on instinct. Do what makes you happy. Like of course you have human reasoning and such but STILL. You're so non human and otherworldly it makes his stomach knot up and his dick hard as a rock. He wants to know EVERYTHING about you.

If you have a heat/rut cycle...he is. fucking. begging you come to him for help. jfc you don't even have to let him stick his dick in you. He just slowly probes your hole with his fingers and legit GASPS when he feels it clench around him. Not only is he learning so much about you and monster anatomy but hes also having his monster fucking dreams come true.

I mean it is a given with Laios but his fucking face is always in your hole. He loves eating pussy/ass so fucking much. And having your dick, clit, or knot down his throat drives him wild. He eats your slick and cum like he's starving. He's so sloppy with it too--there's spit and slick and cum all over his face and he's just slurping it all up like its his last meal.

He definitely "examines" you. He'll stick his fingers in you and stretch out your hole just to get a better look at what's inside. (imagine his thumbs sliding in and prying you open.) The muscles pulsating and the color and the smell...god he's drooling. You feel all vulnerable and exposed but he's just constantly praising how amazing your body and its functions are.

He busts so quick with a beastkin it....wow. Like. You are seriously all he has ever dreamed of and shit. I can't imagine he'd be able to contain himself. He cums and just still wants more, he fucks you through the overstimulation until he cries

Oh he wants to know whats in your pants so bad its ridiculous. Like. I cannot explain just how much he is vibrating with excitement

If you have a cloaca...he's very gentle with your hole at first. You explain to him what to look for, what feels good. He'll gently explore with his fingers until he finds the right hole and then he's going at it. He's shoving his tongue in there happily too. He knows what a cloaca is. He knows it's a singular vent for waste and sexual functions. Doesn't matter. His tongue is going in there. Laios is beyond excited to taste everything and see what makes you squirm.

If you have a knot...it's a given he wants you to knot him. It takes him a few tries (he can't take your knot at first because he's too tight) but when he finally is able to its like. euphoric for him. He loves feeling your warm cum in his ass and your desperate pants against his throat as your overstimulated self gets adjusted to being stuck to him. Gods.

Plus...I've discussed this on my blog in more detail but with a beastkin reader he's definitely into

You biting/scratching him up. He lovvveess being marked. Use him as a chew toy PLEASE

Predator/Prey rp: He's a trained hunter but he wouldn't mind being hunted...He loves how strong you are and how you can turn the tables on him if you wanted.

Just?? You being feral?? He likes it when you act more like your monster side and just treat him like a toy.

Breeding Kink: Even if you aren't able to get pregnant or breed (either due to sex or incompatible genetics due to being part monster), he's still really into it. You can fill him up vice versa...He loves the feeling of having you last inside him and he loves knowing you're still filled up from him. Plus, it adds to the more animalistic part of sex which is what he likes

#laios touden #laios x reader #dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi x reader #delicious in dungeon #reader insert #marcille x reader #senshi x reader #chilchuck x reader

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parisoonic · 7 months ago

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How the hell do you manage to superimpose the hilariously exagerated proportions of the tf2 mercs into a cohesive 2d style? I always struggle SO much with like, the way the mercs' models have huge hands, the way they have relatively low-poly definition on things like arms, shoulders, and legs... and Especially the way like, the models are kinda janky when you pose them for art purposes- when using movement tools, things like armpits and seams between body parts get all deformed... Which makes the study of form and silhouette rather difficult.

I assume that a lot of your ability to translate the concept of the mercs from their original mediums into your own works of art comes to you quite naturally- through experience you have with drawing and art style stuff, as well as through intuition. I was simply wondering if I could poke at your mind and get some insight into your process, any thoughts you have about the proportions and silhouettes of the mercs, any quirks you've found while drawing the mercs, or simply what you enjoy drawing about them. Like, don't be afraid to infodump about something just because you think people wouldn't find it interesting- I am here, I am sitting, and I am listening- if you so choose to speak.

I am utterly fascinated and enraptured by the more behind-the-scenes aspect of art. The mundane things that come second nature to great artists yet seem so revolutionary to less experienced artists.

I love your work, I look forward to seeing more of it, and I hope you have a nice day :]

Sorry for the late reply! I've been a little…stuck on how to answer this but that's mainly because to me, drawing is composed of SO many different little skills - you have form, anatomy, shape language, silhouette, appeal, rhythm, acting and posing…not to mention everything AFTER your raw draughtmanship like line style, rendering and colour theory. Trying to distill a multiude of small skills into some pithy advice is overwhelming to my brain. So I'll take the invitation to ramble instead :))

I don't think I have any new or revolutionary insight into the tf2 guys specifically - more I'm using them as work horses to excercise general silhouette/posing/shape-language and further my skills when it comes to drawing characters!

I do agree though the proportions are rather silly when you stop and think about them realistically…they can be kinda tricky if you follow their 'actual' proportions. what looks great individually was maybe never meant to be directly compared (ie: Heavy's hand size against Spy's lol). It would've been funny if the TV show exsisted and we had more content to review…would the animators have had rules like Spy and Heavy can never shake hands? Would they cheated the proportions for shots? Or would they have said WHATVER it's gonna look weird and embraced it? (Like Kingpin in Spiderverse lol)

Paul Lasaine for 'Into the Spiderverse' This is AWESOME. But it's also one of the silliest designs I've ever seen comitted to screen. The varied scales of the characters work because of the unifying treatment (lighting, rendering, consistant hand anatomy, consistant clothing fold treatment etc) and because they are sort of proportional within themselves. A common mantra is that hands should be about as large as a characters face....which they all are here!

Human brains are very flexible and forgiving though. It's totally fine for you to put a character with huge hands and head next to a teeny tiny character! Vanellope and Ralph from Wreck-It Ralph look grand next to each other! And in that film you even have varying levels of stylisation sitting against each other (unified by the look dev treatment of the shaders and lighting). I think as long as the chracter is proportional within themselves it sort of works out. IE: a general rule is that a hand should be as large as the face so…you can have some large arse hands as long as their placed on a body with a big arse head. Unifying characters with the same treatment (ie: lineart brush, colouring style will also help them look cohesive next to each other :) )

I don't actually reference the 3D models/animations very much at all and instead draw their proportions based on my tastes for stylisation following their general vibes/silhouette profiles. I don't stick THAT close to their in-game looks and there are artists who do that are so so so much better than me (Creedei and Flapjack come to mind). I'm not amazing at body-type differentation and TBH they're all wearing chunky clothes all the time so I usually draw the guys as one-of-three body shapes: Heavy is the uniquely wide guy; Sniper/Scout/Spy are all tall and slim and Demo/Soldier/Medic/Engie have a little more of the generic 'hero' bodytype with varying tallness and broadness of the shoulders

Something like this! You can vary all these individual elements in terms of size, thickness, taper amount etc to create different characters. If you ARE going to reference the 3d works though you'll need to apply some anatomy knowledge to overcome the weird shoulders, armpits and knees which desperately need blendshapes to correct the 3D volumes and approach it a little more like an animation supervisor. There's a reason why you see in making-ofs and art-ofs character designers, character leads or animation supes doing drawovers of the models. These are character models that have had great effort put into their 'base' silhouette but it still needs to be reinforced in every frame for maximum appeal.

Shiyoon Kim for 'Raya' This sort of thing will occur at multiple stages during the animation process. Shiyoon Kim's notes are post final model but pre-animation. Most likely for internal rig tests, exploring what blend shapes and alt shapes are needed for the rigs etc. If your production has time, this will continue all the way to final anim. IF! But it's interesting to see how he emphasises the shapes and enhances the character acting of the 3d model.

As for 'mundane things' - I wouldn't say they're second nature! (If that makes you feel better!) I have to actively really persue certain advice and try to figure out how to best apply it. This can sometimes involve redrawing and redrawing an element of the drawing until I've grasped the nettle of whatever I'm after or…..until I get frustrated and either delete the drawing or just call it done lol

Here, I'm looking for a really specific flow of the head that sells both the acting and a subtle head tilt. I'm also trying to apply the general mantra regarding faces that converging lines (set by the eyebrows and mouth) are more appealing than parallel. It's tough! I also tend to use a drawing I've already done as a template/reference on the page too. Oh! This page is an amazing example of why I'm not an animator or storyboarder…consistancy? Who is she? 💅

Converging lines (that form tapered shapes) are always more appealing than parallel. Using this logic you can loft the facial features across converging lines to create dynamic appealing espressions. Combining this with anatomy, perspective and rotation is the tough part though. I'm still learning o7

The things I probably think about MOST are always flats vs curves, simple vs complex and general line of action/flow...and then eliminting tangents. Each of these can be a dedicated visual-essay on their own - hence my stumbling as to answer your question. Anyhow, not sure if it's ever come up on this blog but I looove dinosaurs :)) so i'm using a wee piece to demostrate these ideas! (but also to demostrate these concepts apply to everything from humans characters to animals, props and background design)

Okay, I'm getting self-aware that this is getting really long :') I have a wee tutorial tag for my blog if anyone wants to comb through my garbled art-thoughts. Learning, studying, repetition and practice will always be the greatest teachers! I'm glad you like my art- thank you so much for the lovely comments - I feel like such a noob still and not qualified to give people advice but we're in it together learning! High-five! 🙌

#tutorial #asks #sorry for any spelling mistakes whoops!#hopefully...this is VAGUELY useful or interesting to people ;;#TBH I'd much rather do youtube drawovers/videos of my own or others work as that is...my job...rather than doing writeups lol #its much easier to talk and vibe about a piece of art vocally than to try and make everything uber succint in writing

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pinkaditty · 20 days ago

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JUST TAKE MONEY ALREADY UGHHH

THAT HAKU FIC???? OMG OBSESSED IT WAS SCRUMPDELICIOUS HSHSJSJSJSJ

AND you're cooking up a Subaru fic???!?!!? YOU'RE SPOILING US SO MUCH THANK YOUUUU

Visions (Yan!Perv!Subaru Kagami x Reader; Tokyo Debunker)

ok its finally here holy shit wht ther ufckkckckkc

also THANK YOUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!! IM SO GLAD U LIKE THE WORKS YIPPEE!!!!!!!!

a/n: i went 2 bed the night after writing starstruck coral and woke up thinking about how touching you is how yan!perv!subaru would keep tabs on you. is this deranged and out of pocket? maybe. but was this real as fuck? ab-so-fucking-lutely. anyways. admittedly not the biggest fan of yandere characters unless they’re the harmless-type, stalker-type, or worship-type yandere yk? they’re strangely possessive and slightly stalker-y ish? maybe the occasional sabotage of a love rival perhaps. they don’t kill anybody, just get really jealous. which. kinda suits subaru.

2 explain a little bit. i buy in2 the theory that subaru is NOT nearly as innocent as he portrays himself and purposely puts that image forward 2 fool others. i like 2 think he won’t let go of it, even when caught, bc its the best way 2 weasel out of things. i also think that, 2 an extent, it is actually genuinely a piece of his personality and how he genuinely acts, so the act is harder 2 see through bc it seems so,,, like him, if u will.

summary: you want subaru. subaru has a reputation to uphold.

cw: voyeurism via psychometry??, masturbation, breaking and entering, creepy, weird, perv and yan behavior idk idk. also editing was rushed sorry!

WARNING: the ending 2 this is like. kinda crazy. at least 2 me idk! i wrote it like "wow this heat" but idk tumblr might not like it! u've been warned.

Subaru is the type to hide from his desires, despite how strongly they pester him. He belittles himself by convincing himself that such things are improper, corrupt, and shameful, and that indulging in them would taint his proper, innocent, humble manner. To him, he must keep up the perfect, trimmed, clean, graceful exterior in tandem with his placid, unassuming, and polite demeanor. It is the only way to conduct himself. So, he hides from that which would shake his precariously balanced mask, even goes as far as to express discomfort when exposed to things that are supposed to be outside his comfort zone, even if they are things he’s long been aware of or indulgent in. He refuses his naturally decadent tendencies and strives to upkeep his gentleness.

In truth, he knows what he is. A hedonistic sybarite. A guilty heathen. A depraved sinner. These titles haunt him, constantly at the back of his mind, reminding him of the consequences of indulgence and the rewards of self-control. He holds these reminders close to his heart. He will not flinch. He will not falter. He will not break.

And then you happened to be one of the first people to know about the truth of his stigma. He supposes he can pin the onset of his downfall there.

As pretty as you were, and as perverted as he was, he had already grilled it into his mind that desires of the flesh were not worth faltering for, not if he was to keep being perfect. You were easy to brush aside at first, his focus trained on maintaining his carefully crafted personality. All was well until he mistakenly touched your hand one day.

You’d been over for tea and sweets at Hotarubi. The gentle sounds of rain against the window and light chatter of Zenji made for the perfect ambience. Haku was off on a mission, but Subaru and Zenji were there, enough to keep you company. Subaru is pleased to listen to Zenji’s lamenting poetry, and smile apologetically at you for his ramblings. He’s astonished at how well you seem to fall for his mask. There were times where even Haku had seen past it, not that the other man had much room to comment on it. He smiles to himself, seemingly unassuming, thinking you’re rather naive for a cursed girl. He makes the mistake of slipping off his glove and reaching for a sweet while looking at Zenji, not wanting to get any crumbs on his gloves. He freezes when he feels your hand brush against his, images flashing before his eyes, layering over his vision.

To your credit, you flinch backwards, apologizing profusely. He notes his expression must appear dazed, because you add on: “You must’ve seen my busy morning, huh?” You chuckle to yourself, smiling apologetically. “Sorry again, Kagami.”

He shakes his head, the vision finally subsiding, blinking to restore his normal sight. “It appears to have been stressful. I see why you stopped by.” He crafts a welcoming smile, a small, trembling voice, and an overwhelmed undertone in his expression. Judging by your slight bow, it’s perfect, and fools you.

He hides his darkening expression behind his teacup, pretending the smile dropping from his face so abruptly is simply so he can blow on his tea. Zenji returns to his rambling after checking on Subaru, ensuring he was well. Subaru mulls over what he had seen. He’d seen a busy morning indeed, full of the Frostheim King’s demands, the pestering of an uptight paralegal, and a fair bit of hounding by many other overzealous ghouls. But he had also seen how you relieved said stress. Fingers dipping underneath your skirt, in the privacy of your own dorm. He’d heard your soft mewls, seen your hand dripping with essence. He felt like, if it had lasted longer, he’d have felt your plush skin, tasted your dripping heat.

He curses himself for such thoughts, resisting the crease in his brow that threatened to form. He hoped his next sip of tea was bitter and cold as a punishment for his minute indulgence, a reminder of the path he had set himself to. But when he tips the cup back and the liquid reaches his tongue, it’s warm. It’s sweet. It’s tempting. The sticky remnants of the honey used to sweeten it seem to cling to his throat. This was not punishment. The reminders he held close to his heart dimmed for only a moment.

Then he was the picture of elegance again, smiling sweetly as Zenji laughed, pretending his friend was the source of his joy.

The following weeks, despite the sweetness of his indulgence and the temptation rumbling within him, he convinced himself it was only a fluke. It was nothing more than a minor accident, and he couldn’t allow a minor accident to tarnish his clean slate. He had to keep these desires hidden. Yet and still, the vision plagues him, hidden in the deeper corners of his subconscious. He can still see it quite clearly, can almost feel the exact sensations you felt, can almost taste the cloying allure that seemed to saturate the entirety of the vision every time he replayed it in his head. It takes him a while to snap out of it when the vision plays in his mind’s eye. His eyes will become clouded, his breathing will become labored, and his fingers will twitch as he struggles to keep up his restraint. He remains successful, and such bouts of desire only happen in privacy, but he has a gnawing feeling that even remembering the vision is a form of indulgence in itself.

Despite his efforts to not think about it, the vision returns, and he feels shame and anger begin to make their presence known. This was not proper. It was unbecoming of him to allow something to swim in his head so persistently, especially something made to tempt him. He can hardly stand to have a normal conversation with you. Not that it’s your fault, rather that it’s his for succumbing to the wiles you may have inadvertently and unknowingly used on him. He decides that the only way to rid himself of the previous vision is to have another one of you. Maybe he’ll have a vision of a gross habit or something generally unattractive, and perhaps that would neutralize his fixation on your stress-relief techniques. It would be a gamble, but it was an option nonetheless.

He invites you for lunch again with him and Lyca, outside on one of the balconies on campus. It’s relatively warmer, fresh breeze combing through the trees and open windows. Days like this brought a large crowd, which meant it would be no problem to go unnoticed if needed. He sits quietly on a bench, Lyca leaning into his right side, drooling over his lunch but patiently waiting to dig in. Subaru finds himself awaiting your arrival a little too eagerly for his tastes. This would have to end soon.

He finally spots you from afar, carrying a brown box that Sho usually packed his lunches in. He smiles as you approach and holds up his own brown box, his eyes crinkling with mirth. “It seems we had the same idea.” Effortlessly, he turns on the inferiority complex charm, hurriedly apologizing. “Ah, I apologize for not properly communicating with you. We could have waited in line together.”

You smile and shake your head, reassuring him with a quick “It’s no problem, really,” and plopping down on Subaru’s other side. He notes the distance you leave between your bodies and lets his displeasure swim in his gaze before returning to a placid smile.

Lyca barely spends a moment greeting you before digging into his meal, forgetting once again to use his utensils. Subaru sighs fondly before smiling at you and returning to his own meal. He is the epitome of grace, carefully bringing his chopsticks to his mouth, demurely flicking his tongue against his lips to lick up any excess sauce, and chewing so soundlessly you wouldn’t be able to tell. Not a single hair is out of place. Something about feeling your gaze on him fills him with pride and dread simultaneously. Could enjoying the attention of someone he actively attempts not to crave be considered an indulgence?

Lyca suddenly begins hacking next to Subaru, alarming him. Immediately, Subaru assumed it was because he'd practically inhaled his food. He rubs a gentle hand on Lyca’s back until the coughing subsides as you watch with concern. Lyca looks up with a frown, grumbling in frustration about his coughing fit.

When Lyca looks up, sauce and bits of rice are stuck to his cheeks. Subaru has to stifle a laugh, pretending to clear his throat instead, smiling fondly at Lyca. He reaches for his handkerchief, about to help Lyca clean up. When he doesn’t find it in his internal pockets, his confusion grows, searching his other pockets for it. It seems he didn’t have it. He looks back up to Lyca, wondering how he was going to clean him up without any napkins. Lyca looks back at him quizzically. “What? Is there something on my face?”

Subaru sighs and shakes his head. “Hold still, Lyca.” He begins to pull one of his gloves off, not wanting to get sticky residue all over them. It’s when he just manages to slide the glove halfway off that you reach forward, pushing his hand down.

“Here, let me.” Subaru glances towards you as you reach towards Lyca, keeping your other hand on Subaru’s wrist. Your thumb brushes against his palm, and something about the action strikes Subaru as deliberate before he is thrust into another vision again.

Another busy morning—nothing out of the ordinary. A red-headed ranger and his pet held most of your attention today, a certain slacker lagging far behind. Moving back and forth between classes and dorms, getting cases signed, all seemed relatively normal…

At least until he sees you, lying on your bed, laptop propped open, watching a rerun of one of his old shows. He can’t tell if he blushes or not, but he feels the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end.

He feels himself freeze up as you smile wider, watching him twirl across the stage. The vision begins to fade, but his confusion remains at a peak. Had you heard of him before? Were you a fan? If so, why hadn’t you shown any indication of knowing him prior?

If you were a fan, this was mortifying. If you weren’t a fan but were simply doing research, that would be different. He couldn’t quite label it, but it felt… strange? He thinks back to when you first met him and remembers the lack of surprise on your face seeing him there. You couldn’t possibly be a fan. Which left him to wonder why you were watching reruns of his old shows in your free time. And, why had the way you’d brushed your thumb against his palm felt deliberate?

When he comes to, he finds both you and Lyca staring at him with concern. He idly notes he’s out of breath and his forehead feels damp.

“Suba. Are you okay?” Lyca peers at him curiously, curling his fingers into Subaru’s jacket sleeve.

Subaru finds it hard to so much as look in your direction, so he turns to Lyca, donning a simple, yet overwhelmed smile. “I’m fine. Just another vision, that’s all.” He manages to force the words out between pants, slowly catching his breath and blinking to stop the world from spinning. He had too much to think about to focus on appearing prim and proper any longer. What was that vision?

When you pipe up, despite himself, Subaru turns towards you a little too fast. “Ah, I’m sorry, Kagami! I hadn’t realized I’d touched you.” Your face and voice appear apologetic, your eyes shining with pity. To anyone else, this would appear genuine. To Subaru, however, it was anything but. Something about the twinkle in your eyes screamed revelry rather than regret.

He matches your expression, friendly and forgiving externally, with tension and excitement in his eyes. “It's no problem. Please, don't trouble yourself worrying for me.”

Lunch remains uneventful from then on, but even the prickling of your gaze isn't enough to draw him away from the rumbling in his mind.

He wakes up, staring upwards at his dorm room ceiling. It had been a few days since the incident, but he'd hardly been able to rest at all.

His plan had backfired. It only served to worsen his mood. His initial urge encouraged him to blame it on you—his lack of rest, his inability to focus, his slipping facade. It was your fault, somehow. He had to keep you in line, somehow. You were threatening the carefully constructed status quo he had given himself and convinced everyone else of.

He suddenly falters, common sense catching up with his wayward thoughts. It wouldn't very well be proper to do anything remotely threatening, especially to the honor student. He frowns up at his ceiling, worrying his lower lip between his teeth. A sickening feeling bubbles up in his stomach again as the visions revive themselves in his vulnerability, swarming his thoughts. This time, instead of chasing them away, he lets them settle. Maybe he'd find answers within the visions. It should be okay—so long as he didn't indulge. The images play in his mind—you, touching yourself, and you, watching videos of his old shows—and part of him feels the strange urge to draw a flimsy connection between the two. Despite himself, his mind wanders. Without realizing it, his hand begins to slowly travel downwards.

Had you ever touched yourself to thoughts of him? Had you felt the urge to do so when you watched him dance across that stage? Or, was it only a coincidence? But if it was, what was your goal? If his assumptions about you doing this intentionally were even correct, that is. So many questions swam around his head. His breathing picks up and his face and neck begin to feel warm. The images and self-indulgent assumptions of his didn't help. His imagination ran wild with the things you would have done to yourself while watching him, dreaming of him, wanting him. He finds himself squeezing his thighs together and screwing his eyes shut tight.

Any sort of relief in any form would do him good now, he thinks. He feels himself begin to tremble, his skewed brain focusing more and more on the idea of you touching yourself to thoughts of him. He imagines how it would look. Maybe you’d have your laptop propped open before you, marveling at his flexibility and physical prowess. Maybe you would be mesmerized by the way decorated fabrics would swish around his form. Maybe all these things were attractive to you, and you’d let your own imagination run wild—pinning him down, exploring the angled planes of his body, testing his flexibility as you saw fit—he’d be eager to prove himself to you. He imagines how his name would sound—mewled, moaned, or screamed—all in your voice, from your lips. He licks his lips to prevent his own from taking the shape of your name, silencing himself with an audible groan. Hearing the hunger and desperation in a single groan stops him in his tracks. He blinks awake from his hazy state, shivering in horror as he realizes he’d been palming himself, his hand moments from wrapping around his cock through his pants. He yanks his hand away from himself, turning over in bed and pulling his comforter over his head. He grinds his teeth together, his hands running through his hair and gripping his bangs out of frustration. He’d just been self-indulgent, nearly going as far as touching himself to thoughts of you. His mind swims with reminders of the consequences of self-indulgence, the path it would lead him down if he continued to crave. He bites his tongue, trying to relieve himself of the focus his brain was lending to his rock hard length. He attempts to control his breathing, inhaling and exhaling shakily at a pace he had practiced for years before. It doesn’t work, not in the way he would like it to. He’s barely managed to get a few breaths in before his alarm sounds next to his bed, reminding him of the time. His eyes fly open and he cannot resist the rage that courses through him. He rises to a seated position, exhaustion contributing to his frustration and anger. He reaches for his alarm, grasping it firmly in his hand. He is about to hurl it across the room, his rapidly increasing rage at himself, at you, at his inability to indulge nearly consuming him.

But, wait. He pauses, blinking blearily as realization washes over him. This was no way to act. Shame overtakes him as he glances back at the alarm he holds in his hand. His grip falters and the alarm slips in his grasp. Slowly, he lowers his arm, and gently places the alarm back on his desk, silencing it with a dainty tap. He sits upright, folding his hands in his lap. Acting with anger was unacceptable. If the glass of his alarm were to shatter on the ground, someone would have surely come running, and witnessed the fury that twisted his expression, his arm positioned after a throw, and his still obvious hardened length. No, he couldn’t have that happen. There were better ways to carry himself. The reminder rings true in his head. Anger will not go without consequence. Indulgence will not go without consequence. Deviation from his carefully crafted mask will not go without consequence. What was acceptable, at best, was a slightly creased brow and an endearingly exhausted pout, seemingly unintentional. After a deep breath, he morphs his expression to just that, even pairing it with a quiet sigh. Perfect. Now, to keep this up for the rest of the day.

He was long due for a more thorough reminder of where rage and indulgence had gotten him before. The growing frustration at his near indulgence stokes an urge to bite his lip, but he resists, remaining the picture of elegant, endearing, even adorable exhaustion. He could not allow his anger to show.

He would not flinch. He would not falter. He would not break. Not even for you.

When he walks out of his dorm room to greet the day, he ensures he is nothing less than the picture of perfection, besides a tired expression and a pout to go with it. Today would be another day to take in stride. Surely he could handle your meddling. He couldn’t allow you to be a threat anymore.

So, of course, when he walks into Hotarubi’s tea room, he does not allow himself to be shocked at your presence. Surprise flits across his face for just a moment before he quickly replaces it with a welcoming smile, ensuring his exhaustion still shines through. Haku, seated on the other side of the table next to Zenji with his legs spread out, waves. He clicks his tongue and frowns when he takes in Subaru’s appearance.

“Sheesh, looks like a rough night. You okay?” Haku tilts his head towards Subaru, and Zenji does the same. You twist around to look at him, and he doesn’t miss the emotion that looked suspiciously like satisfaction flickering across your gaze.

“Good morning!” You also greet him with a wave, before your eyebrows dip in concern. “He’s right. Did you sleep at all?”

Subaru puts his hands up in false surrender, his welcoming smile reducing itself to a timid, nervous one. “I’m fine, I promise. I simply had some trouble staying asleep.” Technically, that wasn’t entirely a lie. When Haku nods in understanding after studying him for a moment longer and you look back towards your tea, Subaru sighs with relief internally.

Zenji is playing his biwa today, reciting some of his favorite childhood stories, with occasional commentary from Haku. Subaru finds himself relaxing into the comfortable atmosphere despite having most unfortunately been seated next to you. He supposes, so long as the distance between the two of you remained, there would be no issues. He would not allow himself to yearn for a close to the gap.

This time, he’s clever. He finds no excuse to take off his gloves, instead opting to use a napkin to pick up any sweets. He ensured before leaving his room that his collar was high and his sleeves were low. The only skin showing on his body was that of his upper neck and face, and any such contact to those areas would not go unnoticed, especially if deliberate. He allows himself a minor burst of pride, thankful for his own diligence. He was on the way to going down the proper path once again.

He’s chewing on his final pastry before he’s off to pick up some tea from Benji and check on Lyca. Thankfully, he didn’t need to be seen by many people today, so he could use this opportunity to train himself to regain control over his expressions and emotions. You had a way with breaking down his walls, but that wouldn’t last much longer. At least, he thought so. He hears you giggle as Zenji is mid-story and feels you tap his shoulder. He turns to you, and with a wide grin on your face, you point to your cheek, indicating to him that he’s got something stuck on his. He starts, surprised that his poise had slipped enough for an imperfection, but simultaneously pleased that it was at least charming. Timidly, he reaches for his cheek with his gloves on, biding by his reminders and choosing to deal with the unsavory consequence of crumbs on his gloves in place of another slip-up regarding you. He brushes his fingers along his cheek, but he must have missed it, because you only giggle and indicate it’s still there, rubbing your finger back and forth along your own cheek. Subaru copies your movements, pulling back when he’s sure he’s gotten it off of his cheek. He frowns when he finds nothing on his gloves. He hears you giggle again and sighs internally, deciding to try one last time before giving up. However, he’s too late. He feels your fingers brush against his cheek, brushing away something that felt sticky rather than crumbly. He’d be grateful for the help if it weren’t for the fact that he was thrust into another vision the minute your fingertips touched his skin.

When he’s thrust back into reality, he’s sweating, eyes wide and gaze unfocused. He glances at you, but that turns out to be a mistake. The frightened mask you’re wearing would’ve been impenetrable if not for the slight upwards quirk of your lips. He clenches his jaw and curses you under his breath, which is drowned out by your distressed cry.

“Kagami!” You steady him with your arms, holding him up by his shoulders. Haku is already on his other side, watching Subaru’s face carefully.

Subaru glances at Haku, whose frown deepens significantly. “Alright,” he stands, offering a hand to Subaru. “Let’s get you back to your room.”

Subaru doesn’t even protest, nor does he look back to glance at you. He simply wordlessly takes Haku’s hand and rises to his feet. Haku allows him to lean into his side as they make the trek back to his room, Haku shouting over his shoulder that he’d be back.

Haku keeps Subaru steady as they walk back. Subaru’s mind swims with the vision he just saw.

Haku clears his throat. “If it’s not too much to ask, what’d you see?” Subaru can’t tell if Haku is asking this out of curiosity, concern, or both, but he indulges him anyway.

“A challenge.” His voice comes out somewhat strained. Technically, this isn’t a lie. But it’s not the whole truth, either.

“Oh.” Haku frowns and raises a brow. “Is she in trouble?”

“No,” Subaru shakes his head, donning a reassuring smile and offering it to Haku. This might be a lie. “It seems it was all resolved. Just a little intense, that’s all.”

When Haku smiles in return, Subaru can tell he’s not wholly convinced, but he doesn’t ask any more questions, so Subaru doesn’t offer any more answers.

He had seen a challenge, indeed. It was a challenge from you to him. What else could it have been? The images swim before his mind’s eye over and over and over again. Sweaty skin, panting breaths, raucous moans, his name on your tongue, and a purple dildo to tie it all together. He swallows harshly, feeling his body tense as the vision continues to play in his head. He can feel his half-hard cock prodding at his thigh, the stimulating vision enough to thrust him right back into his earlier predicament.

Indulgence would ruin his plans. Anger would ruin his plans, Accepting this challenge would ruin his plans. And yet, he’s practically drooling at the visual of participating in the invitation you’d left for him.

‘Desires of the flesh are not worth falling for,’ he reminds himself, thinking the same phrases repeatedly. He idly thinks of his continued heaving breaths and the warmth in his face from the vision. ‘There are consequences to indulgence. There are rewards to self-control.’

But were there any rewards to self-control as alluring, as satisfying, as deliciously saccharine sweet than what awaited him if he simply chose to let it all go, just this once?

He mustn’t flinch. He mustn’t falter. He musn’t break. But, surely, so long as he didn’t allow himself to flinch, falter, and break permanently, it should be fine, right? Just this once, right?

His teeth dig into his bottom lip, keeping his pace steady as his mind churns. Perhaps indulging himself is what would remind him of why he chose the righteous path in the first place.

A smile begins to grow on his face. He had a plan.

He makes the final adjustments to the chair across from him and everything it held, ensuring everything was in place. He carefully shifts the teacups so that they are positioned perfectly in line with each saucer. He adjusts his tie, smoothes out the tablecloth, and takes his own seat. Everything was perfect. Now, to wait.

He looks out the window beside him, basking in the dimming light of the roseate sunset, lavender, orange, and yellow blending to create a beautiful view. As prepared as he was for this, he also felt nerves and excitement working their way into his mood. He draws in a breath, reminding himself of the purpose of this endeavor, and releases it, strengthening his resolve. The peace he felt in this decision felt strangely fitting. After fighting it for so long, here he was, giving in to the very things he desired, performing the very show that could end in his fall from grace. But he clenches his fist, reminding himself that he will not fall forever. This was just a one-time thing, to set him back on the right path again. He hoped you would forgive his ambitions.

Finally, he hears a lock click and the doorknob to the room turns. He sits up straighter, holding a cup of piping hot tea in his hand, looking the picture of warmth.

He watches eagerly as you walk inside, your gaze rising to meet his. He only smiles wider when you freeze in shock, staring at him. He notes that confusion rises on your features rather than fear, as you twist the doorknob, wracking your brain to remember whether or not you’d locked the doors to the chapel before you left. Subaru waits patiently, swirling the tea in his hand. When you finally look back up at him, he sees suspicion swimming in your gaze. “How did you-”

“Ah, please don’t trouble yourself with the details.” Subaru cuts you off in the most polite voice he can muster. He projects his voice effortlessly, meeting your ears in a softened tone even from across the room. His tone is gentle, almost timid-like, but firm, leaving little room for questions. He places his teacup down in its saucer and rises to his feet, making his way over to you. His expression is open and his smile is kind and warm. And for once, it feels quite genuine to him. “I was wondering where you were.” He holds his gloved hands out for your bags, silently offering to put them away for you. After staring at his hands for a while, you relent, and he happily carries them to your desk in the far corner. He can feel your questioning gaze on him the entire way. It fills him with glee.

He makes his way back to the table he’d set, standing behind the chair opposite to the one he was sitting on. He pulls it out from the table and gestures to it, warm smile on his face. “Please, sit down.”

If not for what was on the seat, this would seem the perfect polite invitation for tea. Subaru’s eyes were bright, his smile was soft, and his demeanor was polite and respectful. He watches you as you eye the seat warily, a crooked, nervous smile forming on your face. Your eyes flit back to him. He tilts his head upwards questioningly.

“Is it a show you want?” You gesture crudely towards the seat. Subaru only smiles, the look in his eyes darkening. It wasn’t a warning, rather a confession. The smile on your face read as nervous, but he could tell from the way your pupils were blown wide and your fingers were tapping the side of your thigh that you were more excited than you let on.

When you made eye contact with him again, he looks at you expectantly, the expression on his face so open and gentle you would think he was asking for something innocent. He is satisfied when you finally nod, your teeth digging into your lips to hide the smile that threatened to grow. He watches your careful, slow steps towards the chair, your mouth open due to your excited, labored breathing. He, himself, has to bite his cheek out of excitement, not wanting to rush you. When you finally stand in front of the chair, your back to him, you simply reach behind yourself, hike up your skirt, pull your panties to the side, and slide yourself down the length of the purple dildo you’d used not too long ago. Once you’re as comfortably seated as you can be, Subaru tries not to smile wider and pushes the chair in, before walking back to his own seat, sitting across from you.

You’re handling it better than he thought you would, and he commends you for that. He picks up his tea from the saucer, smiling at you. “Help yourself.” He kindly gestures towards your own teacup, steaming aromatic tea sweetened exactly how you like it right in front of you. Your hands have a slight tremble when you reach for your tea, but it doesn’t last long, Subaru notes. He makes eye contact with you, and you return his smile. Your face is flushed and your smile is trembling, and he’s sure if he bothered to look down, your legs would be, too.

He takes a sip of his tea, deciding to stall for a little while longer, reveling in his success. You, however, voice other plans, speaking up to catch his attention.

“Care to tell me what all this is for, Subaru?” The tremble in your voice would be unnoticeable to someone not as practiced as Subaru. He wonders just how many times you have used that dildo to not react so obviously. He bites his lip to stifle a smile from growing much wider.

“Ah…” His voice comes out surprisingly timid, and if not for the circumstances, even he would think this was a normal conversation. But the excitement that roils through him is too real to be imagined, and the boner he crossed his legs to hide was too genuine a reaction. He sips at his tea again before putting it down with a soft clink. He nervously wrings his fingers, his smile wavering. “I suppose this could be considered a confession, of sorts.”

“A confession?” The surprise is clear on your face, and you almost look relieved. “I thought I was due for a punishment or something.” You confess nervously, but Subaru hardly registers the tone in which you said it.

“P-Punishment?” He looks taken aback and says the words almost incredulously, blinking at you with surprise. He exhales, frowning. “No, no, you’ve misunderstood me…” His tone falters back into his usual timid voice, and he shakes his head. His expression is apologetic and genuine. He reaches for his tea, probably as a way to keep his hands busy. “My real intention here…” He trails off, pursing his lips as a blush appears on his face. He felt nervous to admit this, but he reminded himself that this was for good reason. Excitement and heat pooled in his abdomen again, rising to his chest and neck as well. He could feel his heart pound against his ribcage, his breathing becoming heavy with anticipation. He looks towards you, summoning a small smile. “...Was to tell you that I’ll… stop resisting.”

He takes his final sip of tea and places his teacup down. He stands, moving to stand in front of your chair, kneeling down in front of you. He had been right earlier, he notes, observing how your legs were trembling and suppressing a small smile. Wordlessly, he loosens his tie just a little and undoes the first few buttons of his uniform shirt. He reaches upwards and silently holds out his hand for yours, looking up at you pleadingly. You gently place your palm in his, tremor still in your movements.

“If you’ll have me…” He takes your hand and loops your fingers around the collar of his tie, pulling your wrist away from him so his neck would be forced to follow the pull. He bites his lip as he looks up at you, his visage the epitome of bliss, his lips curved upwards in an exhilarated smile, his eyes wide and pleading.

“I’d like to know how you’d want me, Miss.”

ok CHALLENGE 4 ALL MY READERS PLEASE tell me what u would do 2 subaru in this situation. please. im so curious. if ur suggestions r good i might even be inspired 2 write a part 2 bc im already thinking abt it................

a/n: well. i hope that ending wasn't too scary! like i wrote it like "WOW" but. idk. im scared what if y'all hate it aaahhhhhhh!!! anyways. enjoy, please. i put so much work in2 this, truly, bc i really really wanted this 2 be good.

obligatory blurb that i love likes, BUT i mostly love comments, reblogs, and asks detailing how much you loved my work!!!!!! please please please let me know how much you loved the story! i cater 2 u and i want u all 2 enjoy it. knowing u do keeps me going <3

songs i listened 2 while writing this:

gold by britt nicole (accepting urself despite ur flaws... very ironic)

kiss it better by rihanna (physical lust fueling the reconciliation of a toxic relationship)

ecstasy by suicidal-idol (self-explanatory)

sweater weather by the neighbourhood (diminishing oneself, separating the dream from the person, yearning 4 something u cannot have)

taglist: @cupcakesmoothie @aayakashii @sunskosh @despairingy-obsessed @glamorousspoon @mmy-meow @dailyvahine @diluxama

want 2 (join/be removed from) the tkdb taglist? let me know!

#minors dni #tkdb #tokyo debunker #tokyo debunker x reader #tdb #tokyo debunker mc #tkdb smut #tokyo debunker subaru #subaru kagami #subaru kagami x mc #subaru kagami x reader #tokyo debunker smut #subaru kagami x reader smut #subaru kagami x mc smut

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