#sorry didn't want to get too personal
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Cross has trouble getting to sleep alone in his room and goes looking for a distraction, but ends up finding a solution for both of them
#UTDR#UTMV#Cross Sans#Killer Sans#Kross ship#(Kinda. It's up to interpretation)#Long post#I'm so sorry I didn't mean for it to be THIS much#I started this like a week ago -A-#Lies down and lets out a long howl it's finisheeeeeed#I could have just drawn them spooning and written the rest but noooo I love to do things the hard way#Anyway I think they should be bed buddies#The company helps Cross relax enough to sleep and the touch helps knock Killer out#Cross has to be big spoon because otherwise Killer's soul gets squished and it's too uncomfortable to sleep#Also I realised Cross and Nightmare are the only two in the castle who didn't have knock knock jokes in their backstory#I like to imagine Nightmare has had similar confusing interactions with at least one of them#Cross probably spends the rest of the day panicked that he overstepped a boundary or the others will make fun of him#Not realising that Dust and Horror have fallen asleep together many times#Or that Killer hasn't slept properly in weeks and he's in heaven#I'm NOT drawing a follow up so just imagine Killer coming to Cross's room the next night and finding every excuse to stay#Because he wants it to happen again but he has no idea how to ask (and also Cross seems kinda awkward about it)#Absolutely terrified that I spent my whole week off working on this and it might be not that great so I hope at least one person likes this
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Anons are off because I'm done with people lying in my inbox, insulting me, and just piling on. I am one person who is trying to deal with hatred from multiple sides but those sending these messages see themselves as just one person throwing in their opinion because you can't see the other 15 messages I get insulting me for the same thing. I feel like I've been clear about my stance and why I function how I do in my small space online. If you find issue with how I function then please just unfollow me and leave me alone. I'll be offline for a while but I appreciate everyone who's sent me caring messages and things to consider a lot. I'm genuinely disappointed though, that this all comes from me saying I love my Jewish community and I hope they're doing okay- My first message directed at supporting other Jews I've made, after months of reaffirming my care for Palestine. Stay safe yall.
#I have too much to get done rn anyway#I didn't get to do my shop update because things are late but at this point id rather take half my income for the month being gone over thi#I need to protect my stress related health issue still too. my wounds might have healed up but i need to make sure it doesnt flare up again#I'm genuinely sorry to anyone who my way of functioning isn't enough for. I can't be everyone's idol or hero or person they respect.#and i dont want to be any of that to anyone. im not some moral figure for others. im legit just a guy who draws personal art some people#ended up liking#anyway i need to stop looping on this. i hope everyone will have a good week.#jumblr
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The fact that Main-verse Ooo is as good and as kind as it is (relative to the other universes shown so far, at least, it's obviously not perfect) all because of the same character that starts off as the OG series' antagonist, the person we were made to see as the bad guy (albeit an often ineffectual one) for several seasons, is making me lose my mind.
Imagine finding out the guy you spent your childhood beating up and saving princesses from is in fact a driving catalyst behind you being able to exist, and not only exist but also live in a world that knows what kindness is. All because that man, the same man who you've witnessed do terrible things, once met a little girl and taught her how to be good.
Simon's story really shows us that even if you lose your way and forget how it is to be good yourself, the world keeps the memory for you. That act of love Simon showed Marcy by protecting her and seeing her as more than the monster she thought herself to be created ripples upon ripples, small at first but eventually enough to help give their wreckage of a world—a world that easily could have been forsaken, its goodness overlooked because of its inhospitable remains—a chance to grow into something beautiful. Because of those very same ripples Simon created, the people of Ooo grew up in a world where they know enough about kindness that they were able and willing to spare the 'bad guy' some, to see beyond the wreckage and allow him to grow too.
In saving Marceline, Simon helped to not only to save the world, but also himself.
#fionna and cake#fionna and cake spoilers#adventure time#simon petrikov#ice king#marceline abadeer#simon and marcy#meta#this was just a phone note to get thoughts out of my system but then it came out semi-coherent#so welp guess i'm writing meta now. i'm really in the deep end now. but yeah...Ice King and Simon's story being about the power of kindness#A cruel world requires constant cruelty to be maintained. But kindness? That reaches across time. one act of kindness sparks another#'I need to save you but whose going to save me?' That act of love and compassion is gonna save you ya dingus....eventually#In a less kind world finn and Jake could have watched those tapes about Simon and still decided IK was a hopeless cause.#That he was too far gone to be saved. But they didn't. They chose to treat him nicer and actually be friends with him.#One thing i always loved about IK's story is that he didn't have to completely change himself for people around him to treat him better#They changed their perspective and were kind to him and it was THAT that helped him change. to grow beyond the 'antagonist' role#to quote my go to and all time favourite good place quote:#'the point is people improve when they get external love and support. How can we hold that against them when they don't?'#Arrgh sorry I just always loved Ice King's arc in the show. From pesky antagonist to the person Finn dived into a chaos god to save#(the world's new beginning and its near ending being all because of simon. he has such main character energy and boy does he not want it)#And now we're getting Simon stuff and I'm so normal I'm so normal I'm so normal (<- has never been normal about this character)#(i...i have many MANY drawings of ice king and simon from 2015 and the years after. i was doomed from the start. F&C was the final straw)#(as was reading marcy's secret scrapbook recently...and here i thought i'd truly reached the capacity of hurt i can feel about these two)#Going insane over these last two episodes. 'she didn't have a me'. Fionna and Simon bonding. Gumlee kiss. PETRIGROF BACKSTORY#and the implication that Simon isn't remembering it accurately? Their sweet sounding love song actually foreshadowing their issues?#I am clawing at the walls. thank you AT crew you are enriching the enclosure that is my brain
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IT'S OCTOBER!!!!
I have no idea what's happening out there, I'm living in this isolated semi offline bubble to avoid spoilers and it's killing me, but WE'LL BE PLAYING THE NEXT DRAGON AGE *THIS* MONTH. AFTER TEN. WHOLE. YEARS. HOW FUCKING CRAZY IS THAT. IT STILL DOESN'T FEEL REEEAL.
#it has been such a long journey...#I can't believe we're here#I'm sorry I swear I have not abandoned this place 😂#it's just that fandom space and internet in general right now is.. a lot#and there are so many voices and opinions and.... I just want to play this game lol#I'm too old and too tired#it's a miracle we're getting this#maybe I'm just too easily pleased and I have my fair share of criticism but.. I'm just so happy it's real and singleplayer story-focused..#if things like anthem and jedi fallen order didn't happen the way they did we would've gotten a *very* different game#and there are a few other very personal reasons why this game means so much to me..#so yeah.. I'm just happy and excited and nervous and emotional 🥹🥹🥹#ONE MONTH
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being normal about thistle and the touden siblings in the most insane way because imagine you're a sad out of touch hopelessly devoted little magician whose family has been actively pushing for you to see this path of self-destruction that they set you on to its fatal end and being confronted with that sends you tumbling down a doom spiral to hell from which there is no escape but then suddenly from out of nowhere two brainless randos bust into your house and offer the first real acts of kindness and gentle touch and validation of your personhood you've received in at least a few decades if not centuries if not your whole life (for want of which you Did All This Shit in the first place), and unlike the other dickheads breaking into your house all they care about is Being Nice To You For Free and deep frying your security cameras and tbh you wouldn't know how to react to this on a good day whatever that looks like so you just go along and eat their funny snacks and tie them both to a pole like puppies you picked up off the side of the road and then with all that said and done you immediately die
#me when a broken young person is offered kindness and a second chance (but theyre too far gone to recognize it for what it is):#GRRAH RAUGH RAUGH GRRR GRRBHRHRRHRH#sorry i went insane over falin healing him and touching his cheek#and laios healing him and insisting on having a meal#both of them tried to get him to eat w them actually it reads like he's a grimy little cat being confronted by social dogs#who bear a resemblance to his family rip#also really funny that they keep tying each other up can you all be normal for 5 seconds#well falin didn't do anything but she already did so much#thistle & toudens ping my desire to see nebulous found family that doesn't equate to a nuclear family so baddddd#whereas thistle and the melinis poke the rabid animal in me that really really really wants to see what familial divorce energy looks like#dunmeshi#dm spoilers#thistle#thistle dungeon meshi#touden siblings#laios#falin#roomba media#dmposting#falin & thistle#laios & thistle
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This is probably going to be a very long post but the more I think about the rise (and subsequent fall) of the New Mandalorians, the more that I get wrapped up in not only the colonialism committed by Satine and the movement, how it began in such a horrifyingly understated way, but also how it paved the way for Mandalore to be destroyed thanks to the almost-complete erasure of their culture.
First of all, Canon verse deciding to remove the True Mandalorians (and placing the "Old" Mandalorians in a similar, though less prominent position) feels particularly underhanded and paints everything in a black and white manner. Satine: a sympathetic character who is the only one standing against Death Watch, the last shred of peace left for Mandalorians to cling to. Which. Last standing? Yes, definitely. But not the only one.
A war where Death Watch and the New Mandalorians were the major players, only to have Death Watch defeated – even with the assistance of the Jedi keeping Satine alive – makes little sense from a technical standpoint. Is it impossible? Probably not. All sorts of things can happen in history, pure dumb luck makes every difference, but it's unlikely. A party which seeks peace is not going to survive against another ultra violent, volatile party that's pissed off at you because you want to erase the culture that they so deeply value.
Which, yeah I don't buy it. Even with the Republic stepping in later on, it's fishy. But for the sake of my sanity, I'm mostly focusing on Legends, because the more you try to create a coherent timeline (seriously, how is Clone Batch Math easier than this?) for the Mandalorian Civil Wars, the harder it is not to give up entirely.
Anyways. Satine did not survive years of conflict due to mere smarts and perseverance, and did not end the war by being charismatic and having good people skills. She was the LEAST THREATENING PARTY in a three-party war, hunkering down with her Jedi protectors and playing politician while the actual warriors in the conflict weakened one another and – for the True Mandalorians – were wiped out.
True Mandalorians. Death Watch. New Mandalorians.
So, okay. The approximate dates of the beginning and end of the Mandalorian Civil Wars don't necessarily make sense with Satine’s age. She'd have been slightly younger, and Canon seems to have a tendency to just wave their hand in the general direction of a time period and deflect onto another topic.
Which, you know what? Fine. I can work with that without having to think too hard about the dates. It kills me not to delve into it further, but. No. It's not like Disney's gonna pay me to fix their broken timeline.
(But if I had to, I'd shift Jaster's death to 47BBY instead of 52BBY, and push the Battle of Galidraan a year back to 43BBY, and—)
Here's what's important to remember, though:
- There are two Mandalorian Civil Wars. The first being True Mandalorians vs Death Watch. The second being the much shorter, and quickly solved Death Watch vs the New Mandalorians.
- The massacre of the True Mandalorians happened shortly before the beginning of the second civil war.
- The True Mandalorians had already been dealing with Death Watch for years, and they were winning. Death Watch wasn't just on the run, they were weak, they had to resort to TRICKING THE JEDI into killing the True Mandalorians for them.
Who wasn't weak? The New Mandalorians, the people that actively choose to turn their back on a culture that had survived for centuries. And yes, Death Watch remained even after the True Mandalorians fell. Tor Vizsla targeted Satine and the New Mandalorians viciously after that, there was even more destruction, but it wasn't with the severity with which he'd prosecuted the True Mandalorians.
Here's what happened next: Jango Fett escaped his enslavement. He hunted down Tor Vizsla, and he killed him. Whatever strength Death Watch had regained in those few years didn't matter, because the second their leader was gone they were certainly left unorganized and at a disadvantage.
Giving the New Mandalorians the opening they needed to cement in people's minds to their beliefs and convince the House and Clan leaders that abandoning their old ways was the solution. After all, how much more of Mandalore was left to destroy? How many more had to be lost?
With the public's approval and the Republic’s help, Satine Kryze and the New Mandalorians scavenged the corpse of Mandalore, and they took what they deemed fit, left the rest to rot and – given time – be erased completely.
What's worse is that Satine's activism and speeches made it sound like that made sense (because, to Satine, it did make sense); abandon what Mandalore once was because that's the reason we've been destroyed, isn't it? (Not entirely untrue.) And these people, whose world had been ravaged, who's clans and families had wrecked everything with in-fighting, were tired and desperate enough that they listened.
Actually, here's what's really worse — Satine got LUCKY! The first time! It should not have ended like that. But because she got lucky, because it worked once, she tried to do the exact same thing when the entire galaxy went to war. And she ignored the suffering of people whom she should have known empathy towards, who were going through the very same torment she experienced as a child. Because her position of superiority where peace is the only answer was so ingrained in her beliefs, because she was ARROGANT.
And because peace was the only answer, because she'd disavowed any sense of warrior culture from her people, Satine had as much a hand in dooming Mandalore as everyone who went in with the worst intentions. Does it matter that it was doomed regardless, because Maul was the great evil that came to destroy them? No. Maul was just the most convenient means to an end the resurrected Death Watch could find, but if not him it would have been anyone — anything – else.
I do feel for her. She had to experience her father's death so young and step into a role he'd left behind, didn't get a proper chance to grieve because she had to be strong for everyone else who was grieving. She gave up the possibility of love for duty. Satine was a good leader, I won't argue that, and she was the last stand between Mandalore and total annihilation, but she was also deeply flawed.
#narrator: and it was in fact a very long post#the star wars brainrot won't let me rest so im forcing people to percieve my takes#i love mandalore and it's complex history so much but i do not love all of the decisions taken by some people#i am not trying to hate on satine so don't come for me but looking at it from far away its just. really clear to me#the new mandalorians winning was dumb luck + the republic wanting a new puppet#star wars#true mandalorians#death watch#eza.txt#also looking too closely at these dates made me realize that my age hc for bo katan would make her 3 during the second civil war. oops#a thirteen year age difference between siblings isn't impossible though and it would also explain why bo was so strongly death watch#if you didn't personally experience it you wouldn't be able to see why you maybe shouldn't join the evil mando group!#satine kryze critical#sorry forgot people get angy too easily on this website lmao
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hey man. i'm just saying. why would we put inexperienced teenagers with over-inflated egos and obvious emotional issues into combat classes and make them claw their way to the top of their dorms and expect things to just run smoothly. who actually thought this
#the reason rsa doesn't have overblots is because they understand the joy and whimsy of life and friendship btw#LIKE. why is there no school counselor?? do you know how much time & resources & effort & TRAUMA we could have saved the students &#school from if ANYONE had reached out to riddle and was like 'hey are you alright i heard xyz and i wanted to let you know...' ESPECIALLY#since TREY LITERALLY TELLS US 'oh well here's the lowdown on her trauma this is Probably what is causing this'#or if someone sat down to tell leona 'hey! i'm rooting for you in ur magift(?) game! you're my fav player!!' AND LET HIM FEEL NOTICED#or if someone approached azul as an Equal to try to stop his plans. as a friend even. BEYOND A BUSINESS TRANSACTION#or if ANYBODY BUT ESPECIALLY KALIM was like 'jamil i think you should follow your passions and do something you enjoy today!!' or AT LEAST#let him know he was appreciated as a person NOT JUST FOR HIS WORK#'i know you're doing a lot today but i just wanted to thank you for how much Effort you put into this and..' etc etc etc#ERM.. IF ANYONE TREATED VIL LIKE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CELEBRITY??? or even 'hey i loved you in this film i was wondering if we could#do a play together or something..!!' AND LET HER TRY A TYPE OF CHARACTER SHE NEVER GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE. and sing her praises.#if anyone reached out to idia beyond a 'hey the teacher said to come to class'/'get out of your bed and come to our housewarden meeting'#or even. IF ORTHO HIMSELF was like. 'you know it's not your fault... you didn't cause all of this. not really' OR SOMETHING#or if malleus ever got to experience a small firsthand loss AND WAS COMFORTED THROUGH IT. not just quick fix via magic. not replacing. just#GRIEVING SOMETHING??????? and wasn't feared by literally everyone#um. maybe the real twisted part is that all of this tragedy was easily preventable if we had a support system in place.#but idk. twst is a highschool. there's no support in real high school either. i'd probably overblot too if i could ajdjrjfinfdndjd#twst#chatter#LONG RAMBLE SORRY#yes overblots are essential to the plot. but also. do you know how frustrating it is watching the blot build up and sitting in silence.#I'M SORRY IK IF SOMETHING LIKE THIS WAS HAPPENING TO A GUY I JUST MET I WOULD PROBABLY NOT NOTICE.. but of it was my Friend or Housewarden..#I'D ASK BRO.... I'D ASK ... UGHHHHHUUUHHHH#not that anyone would notice if *I* was about to lose it tbh#speaks volumes about our society o think#OKAY NOW I'M DONE FOR REAL
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@divingdownthehole
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as barton was left to his own devices in the kitchen, it only then just occurred to him how the seven-fold bistro had a tv in the side of their lobby. and that could potentially be very bad if they weren't talking about the latest humdrum gossip in relation to bruce wayne or something — so, he would have to find a way to not appear suspicious and also, turn it off if they were talking about the death of the two guards already. barton sighed to himself as he pushed a chunk of the chicken on his plate to the side. he really had his work cut out for him here, didn't he?
of course, there might be a chance that jervis could handle it, he thought. but the last time he had handled something, he'd done it by sticking pins into someone. barton suddenly found himself standing up as if he was startled by the very thought of something like that happening to ravi. he had to create some sort of plan, for he couldn't just bust out of those doors, even if nothing was going on on that television. he tapped on the cold steel of the table below him with his sharpened nails as he contemplated what to do. maybe he could just stick by the almost saloon style doors of them for a bit and listen in on what exactly was going on out there.
just as ravi and jervis had made it to the front of the restaurant, his feet were carrying him to push his entire body flush against the doors, but with not enough pressure to actually open them. he thought he could hear jervis's voice now, but it was very distorted by the wall between him and the rest of the bistro. so he would have to get closer to the outside if he actually wanted to hear anything. while barton was now stressing, ravi honestly couldn't have looked more relaxed, as any friend of barton's was a friend of his. ( except they weren't really friends at all... but i digress. ) he smiled slightly whenever he heard him mention the soup out of approval, ❝ ooh... good choice. i love our mulligatawny soup, but it usually has rice in it, rather than on the side. but i could always request that our chefs put it there instead if you want. ❞
he shrugged nonchalantly and nodded, knowing that the kitchen would be more than willing to do something like that for jervis. ravi could feel his ears perk up and barton's ears did the same exact thing as a breaking news alert popped up on the tv. alright, well, he was not going to be waiting inside the kitchen any longer for something to happen — that was for sure — and so he opened up one of the doors in such a way that it wouldn't attract much attention. barton seemed to materialize out of quite literally nowhere, at least from ravi's point of view, before he was grabbing him by the opposite shoulder a little aggressively but not too much.
barton had played this off as him trying to playfully scare the other but what he was really aiming to do was turn the tv off. and that's exactly what he managed to do with the remote below the counter while ravi was too busy with being shocked, but then laughing in response to barton's 'cheeky' behavior as he spoke to him in between laughs and pushed him away from him, before punching his arm. ❝ oh, my god. you scared me! you jerk, why did you do that? don't tell me that this is you still being bitter that i beat you last time we sparred or something. ❞ ravi was still laughing, so he obviously didn't mean anything that he said in a malicious way as barton himself tried to catch onto the other's wrist before he punched him, but failed.
barton chuckled a few times before nursing the spot where ravi punched him with his arm. he made himself look guilty, only after winking at jervis whenever the other party wasn't looking, as if to say ' you're welcome ' and said, ❝ ahh, you caught me. but scaring you totally satisfied my need for revenge after you beat me. so, at least there's kind of a positive side to all of this. and just to keep you in the loop, jervis, me and ravi sometimes spar together because we're both boxers, ❞ barton gestured to the other man with one hand while ravi came down from his laughter. he made a playful ' shoo ' gesture towards barton, then. ❝ hey. me and your friend, who is also my friend now, by the way, were having a rather rousing conversation about his interest in the mulligatawny soup before you came along. so if you wouldn't mind... ❞
ravi left barton to fill in the lines of what else he was going to say before the blonde raised his hands in feigned surrender and sat down across a few seats away from them behind the counter. ravi laughed, making a ' come hither ' gesture towards himself, ❝ i was just joking, barton. you don't have to sit so far away. but anyway, i'll put in your order for the soup, if there are no objections? ❞ barton moved silently closer to ravi in particular, setting down his curry in front of him. he seemed oddly a bit protective of ravi based on the look he gave jervis.
it was one that said ' you better continue being nice to him or i'll kill you. ' and trust me, barton would do it, too.
#divingdownthehole#tw: mentions of murder.#tw: slight manipulation.#AWW of course emi! you totally deserve it as i always say haha <33 and plsss you are much too sweet to me#TYSM for the compliment!! you are now one of my ELITE employees okok#and it'll do more than suffice! its perfect TBH (: but its all good. i didnt think that there were any pacing issues personally??#but sameee tbh. also why is barton wanting jervis to be nice to ravi but threatening him by doing so both messed up-#and oddly kind of wholesome to me like JSJSJ i guess because the man is typically anything BUT wholesome??? albeit in his own...#barton-like way. like GAHHH. the layersss loll also i just wanted to say that i replied to this on a separate chain because i noticed that-#our thread was getting quite lengthy and i just wanted to make it easier for us to reply to each other's reblogs SO i installed a browser-#extension to trim reblogs but for some reason it doesn't work with asks? so i have to start a whole new chain to do it but yeahhh.#i'm sorry if this makes it inconvenient for you to reply in any way but i didn't want our other thread to be broken so this was the better-#alternative to that jsjsj
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Ponee (It is half 3 in the morning)
#hey she didn't actually come out too bad!#I didn't show the last time I tried to draw Sunny but it didn't look great ehe ^^;#I think Ponies are gonna have to be a digital art only thing for now cause I had the select and drag so many elements of this#to make this look right sahsdhdshsdh#Yeah despite liking ponies since I've became a conscious thing I never drew them a bunch#and well. that's because I didn't start drawing properly until I was like. 11 years old. and I was super into something else then ehe ^^;#Sorry to get personal in the tags of an mlp art thing but I do think about how I always wanted to draw but like.#I was such a chronic perfectionist as a little little kid??? I HATED everything I tried to make XD#It makes me a little sad yknow? cause like. most kids don't give a shit they just draw whatever and it's beautiful and amazing#it makes me sad that I didn't allow myself to have that! I worked backwards IG lmao#little 6 year old hating everything she tried to make for not being perfect to me now where I love when my art is full of imperfections#that's the point of art!!! Have fun!!! It doesn't need to be perfect or even “good”!#because art is about expression yknow? and drawing stuff you like!#sorry this only took like an hour this should be on a more high-effort drawing sdhdhdshsd#Also um hi to the person who followed me for MLP G5 art?? I mostly post about puters and Ultrakill and Rain World here#But I do really love ponies I need to draw them more often XD#this is my whatever blog. I post whatever interests me here hehe#MLP#MLP G5#Android Arts#Android.txt
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if scars don't make man look good then being alive sure does
#mafia 2#henry tomasino#frank vinci#there's going to be a lot of text in hashtags here so first of all:#i gave up at things like “they wouldn't do/say that” at this point#ooc and “what if” are more interestning and entertaining for me sorry mafia fandom#i like to spin the plot and characters like a rubik's cube#so stopping w rat!henry and continue with survived!henry who's true purpose was to became the head of falcone family#so the drug thing was just a way to frame falcone and get vinci to the point where he decided to do away with falcone#because of the increased drug traffic#henry always struck me as the most conservative of the (relatively) young mobsters#so i guess he wouldn't have gone on about the drugs and gotten vinci's sympathy because of it#yet henry didn't expect an attack from the triads and the fact that he survived only reinforced his religiosity#now he wears a rosary and prays more often than he used to#<- i'm actually too lazy to think about the details of how it might work so whatever#and I know the mafia chief's photo wasn't on the wall#but it's more symbolism about the change of power and prioritizing religiosity over personality#i just think he could be a good leader + there's a lot about his pride here#and tbh i just wanted to see him with the scars but my brain can't do anything without a plot#and sunglasses instead of an eye patch#and yeah my brain refuses to believe that he was just overconfident and really believed that there would be no repercussions ->#for selling drugs under the nose of falcone who clearly wanted to become a monopoly in this field#also i don't really care that much about henry surviving tbh#i mean his death fits the story well because it's after all a mob story (no matter was he a rat or not)#(i'm being a bit of a hypocrite here bc i refuse to believe that joe is dead)#“survive and take power” version is just interestning for me#but if i put aside all of this ooc#naah he was too pathetic to do this fr#k im too lazy to write anything further#thank you for coming to my ted talk
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going crazy about an oc again. like it's my fault
#this is normal behaviour but i get SO pissed off when it's an oc i make for a fic#bc i only ever make fic ocs when their sole purpose is to symbolise something and/or move the plot#like believe it or not i really do try not to have ocs unless it's specifically for the greater good of the fic#so it's like. you are an object to me. you are a tool. WHY have you got your own playlist#cassie you are so. like she's demented she's haunted by a past that broke her she has tried to return three different times regardless#she's whimsical she's erratic she wants to love the world when she has only ever seen the worst sides of it#she found one person who respected her (didn't even treat her kindly. he just viewed her as an autonomous person. that was enough)#and she latched on and didnt let go and now we're here. she followed him to war. she never wanted to fight#she probably wont make it. what the fuck ever#dog teeth#there's another oc in dog teeth that drives me crazy too but his part is much more minimal#i REALLY went hard with dog teeth ocs like they are all so compelling and painful come ON#cass and sasaki u were real to me. im sorry
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unfortunately the percy jackson show means percy jackson discourse which means i once more have to see dogshit takes about rachel elizabeth dare, who did literally nothing except have a relationship with a boy she liked for a couple months, but the freaks are at it again because there's no worse crime in the world than being a girl getting in the way of a ship for a nanosecond
#personal#if i am not defending rachel elizabeth dare from freaks it's because i'm dead#'a greedy and ungenerous soul' she was fifteen???? calm down????#why are you at your big age talking like that about a literal child??????#like sorry that annabeth was incapable of opening her mouth about her crush and someone else happened to be more verbose#that ain't rachel's fault#if annabeth didn't want percy dating she should have communicated better that's not anyone else's problem#rachel and percy liked each other so they went out and then they ended the relationship like that's so normal#and from a doylist perspective it's painfully obvious rachel was there as a lil bump in the road before percy and annabeth got together#so why are you getting bent out of shape about it she was never a threat#and if you shouldn't be pissy about it now anyway when they've been together for like multiple series at this point#and are gonna get together in the show too#like goddamn i'm two steps away from going full percabeth anti just because people can't be normal about rachel for some reason#and i LIKE percabeth#honestly i don't know why twitter feels the need to show me fandom takes they're never good no matter which fandom it is
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Huh. If my life was a quote, it'd be "one of those sad ones with a deceptively happy tune"
#quote from MLP:FIW#sorryyyy been kinda angry about my step family all day#sorry but im so tired of my Stepmom acting like she raised decent kids#my step brother is like 25 and living in my dads home. hes unironically an andrew tate fan and treats his very disabled girlfriend like shit#step sister always got compred to my sister who's the same age and put step sis in the light every time EVEN THO MY SIS WAS LITERALLY BETTER#<- like grades n shit#also both step sibs are gross. never cleans up ever. step brother and his gf are banned from the basement#step bro went to juvy when he was 16 and step sis had a trial last year and almost went to jail#also step sis has mono and would rather die than cover her mouth#i feel bad for SB's girlfriend because she has no other support system and sometimes it feels like SB or SS is trying to kill her?????#my dad threatened to kick out the adults if the house is dirty (adults being SB. SBG. SS. My sister. Aunt.)#My sister does SO MUCH HOUSEWORK and nobody cares and im mad#also bullshit rules recently have made my potential eating disorder worse#i don't think its healthy to rather starve than wash a dish but i actually have cried several times over this#not to mention how much i accidentally starve myself#also our food has been less and less because I don't know what I'm allowed to eat anymore because of my step family#also i have to share the smallest room with my sister. its okay tho ilh and i wouldn't want to get rid of her#sometimes it feels like my stepmom doesn't like me or my sisters because we're “weird”. childish interests and artistic#she lectured me about having missing assignments and I started crying#i said i just forgot to turn in some before the deadline and she called me lazy#<- Oops! so close. its actually THE MENTAL ILLNESS#my sisters and i feel like shit#i feel like my safe space is with my oldest sister.#and you all too! i love you guys#i just feel trapped. trapped by my step family. trapped by my own mind.#i was just starting to feel free from the burden of school and she just made me feel more stressed.#i didn't want to study because she killed the little motivation I had#Spanish exam is now “Fuck it we ball”#sorry for the personal post
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every so often i will see a post from a leftist on this website that is so egregiously ableist that i remember that like. oh yeah the userbase of leftists on this website is violently anti-disabled people and will jump at any chance to demonize any of us for any reason. i just forget that fact because i'm extremely dedicated to curating my space
i'm paraphrasing here but i saw a post that said, "every time i see an American [disabled person] mention being scared about the election because they're afraid of losing their benefits i have to laugh. anybody who wants blood-soaked money from the US government deserves to starve" which. like. goodness that's a lot to unpack. i think we should burn the whole suitcase instead !
#i inserted [disabled person] because they used a fucking slur instead and i didn't want that in my post#like i feel like there should be room for disabled people like me whose lives literally entirely depend on accessing said >#> extremely limited benefits in conversations about whether voting in this election makes you complicit in genocide#which like! i do understand. i do. it's nauseating to think about what this shit ass country is doing. it's horrific. i do not blame anyone#> for not wanting to be a part of that. *and* i am also terrified for my own life because i remember the first time trump won it suddenly >#> became IMPOSSIBLE for ANYONE to get on benefits. EVER. and so many disabled ppl i know went to renew benefits theyd had for decades >#> just to be denied. one of whom was a below-the-neck paraplegic. he died because he lost those benefits!!! because trump won#i really do understand why people dont feel right voting for harris. or why they don't vote at all. i truly do. but holy shit i am so scare#and yes! i am aware that people in palestine and gaza are suffering so much worse. and i wish i could change that#but every single person in power in the US is pro-israel and eagerly drinking the anti-palestine kool-aid. no matter who wins >#> things will not change in that part of the world. and it is infuriating. when the revolution comes this will change. but it hasnt.#the revolution will not save me as a physically disabled person. it will not save any of us. we do not matter to leftists. i am sorry but >#> this is the one thing i have learned after being in leftist spaces for over 10 years. and posts like the one i mentioned prove it#so i am very sorry. i really am. for being physically disabled. but i cannot survive another 4 years relying on my parents for everything#if trump wins i will be killing myself. this is a promise. i cannot do that again#i know it makes me a bad person to be afraid that harris will lose. but people on the left already think i'm a bad person for being disable#i want the genocide to stop. i absolutely do. i also want to survive. i am terrified that the US leftists will sacrifice disabled people#like me so they can feel good about being put in a real life trolley situation#again. im sorry. im so fucking sorry. i wish i was a better person. i wish i was able to give more. i know that if i was just a good#person i would be able to have a job and give to every palestinian gofundme on my dash. i would be able to do more than my daily clicks >#> and reaching out and calling representatives that don't care. if i was a good person i would be able to convince my parents that z*onism>#is deeply fucking racist. and that israel is wildly racist and killing palestinians for fun. if i was a good person i would be able to make#>them leftists too. im sorry. im sorry. im sorry im not good enough. im sorry that im scared. im so scared and it's not right for me to be#when so much worse is going on because of this countrys bloodlust. im sorry that im benefiting from being born here i dont want to be#im sorry for not having any other options. if i was a good person i know i would have them. im sorry. god im sorry im so fucking sorry
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#vent cw#negative cw#ferre said something i hope it was dumb ( ooc. )#i too sometimes wonder if my rp days are coming to an end....#or at least just switch over to writing with only friends#like of course i still love rp#and i truly DO....miss the days when being on my dash excited me#and i didn't feel guilty#like i KNOW i said that i am ridiculously slow and i assume?? that my current writing partners understand that#but i dunno....i guess i just feel like when i do pop in here#it doesn't really matter#kinda like....i'm just another person to get replies from/on dash and that's it#and that's on me.....like yeah i'm ridiculously slow with ooc messages and with replies so ppl are going to move on; i'm not blaming anyone#rn my job and rl is so busy/stressful now...most times when i look at my keyboard to write i get sleepy and i can't write#and i can't help but feel like i'm bothering ppl when i reply to their threads or if i messaged them with ideas bc of how infrequently i ca#be on here#the exception being ppl who i know are just as slow as me (u know who u are)#something tells me that maybe more renovations might be needed or i just need to make new dynamics or i need to find new partners#or maybe even just drop muses/threads/dynamics.....#or even just moving blogs again to clear up space#but i don't think that will work so no moving#i also know that i have...i have a very specific vibe i go for in my dynamics and it's not....it's not everyone's cup of tea#i can't help but also wonder if i'm just being too precious with my muses like#i can't always throw them into any plot or give them spontaneous ships- i wonder if i'm just being too inflexible here ://#and they're on the older side and i don't want to have them constantly in say caretaker roles#i know i'm venting i'm sorry :/#if anyone has advice on just....starting up again#that would be nice....i am also aware that this has become a vent post so feel free to ignore this too#i will...have more time to rest soon so i'll try to get to at least ooc messages
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Dressing the part for new Askr alt ☝️🐮👆
Also featuring art from my bestie Nobu, so go support him 😊
#personal#I was wearing my cow socks too but didn't want to zoom out that much#y'all don't get face reveal yet sorry haha#Askr#Cosplay#?
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