#sorry about the long posts ;w;

[sailingmakai]

"Hah~! Well, whatever he does, I hope you get a laugh out of his reaction~ If he reacts badly, you can fully blame me, I promise~"

'Akira please do not go to the house of the stranger with a friend who buys borax and formaldehyde in large quantities...' Kenzo chimed, again, sounding tired - clearly not enjoying the idea of Akira following a stranger. Akira couldn't blame him - he got into trouble a lot, and when judged solely by his cover, this man was. A bit suspicious.

Sure, he seemed friendly enough, but he'd freely admitted that 'none of them' did much cleaning - and yet. Borax and formaldehyde?

'He's probably just friends with a taxidermist, like you suggested before, or maybe this 'Russ' works with animal bones.' Akira thought back. 'Noone who's friends with a murderer would ADMIT to that, not in public. And the murderer would hardly send a guy out who WOULD admit to that in public.' He could feel Kenzo reluctantly agreeing, and when the little robot didn't say anything, redirected himself back to the other. Besides, if the guy WAS friends with a murderer, well. He'd been in fights before.

"Not keen on cleaning, huh? Opposite of me. I find it relaxing - as long as the chemicals don't smell too strong. Hate that. Burns my nose and makes me cough like a smoker." They made him feel lightheaded, too, if he cleaned with stuff like that for too long.

"But... Yeah, I'm free. Mostly was just noting down stuff I might need before I head off again. Food, clothes, non-perishables. I travel a lot." Not a lie. Just not the whole story. "Two pairs of arms can carry way more than one can. You can get a lot more back that way. Less trips out in the future! Until he runs out again, but still." Plus, he had to admit.

He really wanted to know what 'Russ' did for a living that involved industrial cleaning solutions.

"Russ? A mortician?" 2D laughs, arms snaking around his ribs as if to keep them from busting open from the force of the sound. "N-no, but I'm calling him one next chance I get. He's gonna hate that." And yet, he fails to clarify his profession, hobby, or station. Is it possible he truly doesn't know? With bad vision and evident difficulty getting by day to day, surely there's plenty that goes by under his nose. "None of us are too keen on doing any cleaning. No wonder I didn't know that. I suppose I can pop on in to the market for half of this, then. Ehm...and the rest can w-wait." He balls up the piece of paper and shoves it in a pocket without any further delicacy.

"Well. You busy? If I'm supposed to buy a lot of Borax, I guess I could use an extra pair of hands." Yeah. Buy the stringent cleaning supplies and, what, go to the place this nebulous activity is taking place? Great plan! What could go wrong?

[baking-bugs]

Stop -- Hammer time !

[marybatson]

the only reason I hc billy as an emancipated minor is literally just so that mary can still live with the bromfields and freddy can be fostered by the vasquez family. so rosa and nora have no actual relation to each other or have the rights to tell billy what to do but theyll pick him up for school and have extra bedding and a toothbrush saved for sleepovers and knuckle down his head (rosa) and fix his collar (nora) and. will pick up a household object and swing harder than any mlb player could trying to protect him faster than he can blink

[vellichorsdesire]

your f/o(s) keeping in mind the most seemingly littlest things you mention just cause you’re that important to them… whenever they see your favorite color, thing or a heavy interest of yours they can’t help but be reminded of you immediately and want you to know about it, telling you immediately the next you meet orr taking a picture and sending it to you. them even trying to understand your interests though they know nothing about it or even if they wouldn’t seem interested about it!!! and then keeping the information they learn from you to use in conversation later on with you again, or even learning more about it when you two are away to surprise you

[asraeas]

Assad Zaman as ARMAND Interview with the Vampire 2.03 'No Pain'

[samarecharm]

I wish the thieves had SOME kind of reaction to the Satanael awakening. Kinda wish we at least had RYUJI react to it….

I think its sooooo compelling to have Ryuji be the only person to witness BOTH awakenings; to see how much Akira and his will has grown since they first met. There was a raw, burning fury in Akiras core that recoiled at the injustice before him, and when given the tools to punish said injustice, eagerly accepted it with a wild, almost manic kind of intensity. I think it would be difficult for the others to truly grasp just how scary that was; that for a short moment, Ryuji couldnt pinpoint the cause of that rage, and the target of it. Akiras mellowed out alot since then, but its always in the back of Ryujis head; theres a side of their leader literally none of the thieves have or will ever see, and he doesnt really know how hes supposed to feel about that.

And now the airs charged in the same way he felt back in Kamoshidas palace; right as Akiras eyes widened at seeing him slammed against the wall. The blazing, untamed ferocity in his eyes from back then is replaced with a cool, calm, steely conviction. He knows his purpose; understands completely what his will screamed at him to understand back when it first started. This is the Akira the team knows, and its definitely the one Ryuji is used to now, but its insane to see the shift; insane to see the kind of power that simmered in Akiras core, literally too big and too overwhelming for past Akira to grapple with and set free.

Satanael comes down, and theres a moment, through all the excited screaming and hollering, where Ryuji can see it look right at him, and Ryuji is taken back to the floor of Kamoshidas Palace; not to the fear he felt when Arsene came forth incinerating everything, but immediately after, when Akira comes to with wide eyes and an outstretched hand- that bizarre feeling of safety, of knowing that this kid would have his back, and that hed never have to worry about where his place would be (its right beside him, obviously.)

[fairyofshampgyu]

he’s literally so beautiful and handsome

[fedoraspooky]

(sorry for the screenshots @twilightfreefaller but I wasn't sure how else to answer submissions without like editing it and making it look like you wrote the answer too or something? .w.)

Anyway, to answer your question: The character you've drawn here (very well for mspaint i might add!) is none other than Black Ace, who belongs to @zeurelart!

The kind of tournaments you're asking about were/are known as OC Tournaments, or OCTs for short. While I may not have made Black Ace, funny enough, I was a participant in the same tournament, Escape From Nevara! Our characters never crossed paths, though. XD Here's the lil guy I entered, if you're wondering:

Also I HAVE drawn Black Ace before, fighting Chester! (Chester wasn't in Escape From Nevara so this was purely a what-if scenario I drew for funsies.)

....Damn, i was really cookin with my art back then, what happened? XD ;

Now Chester WAS in another tournament, though it was more an AU of himself. You see, back on dA around the same time was a huge open submission OCT going on called Samurai Duelers League, where you would enter your character (you DID have to change them to match the old samurai-era Japan setting of the tournament though if they otherwise didn't fit, hence the AU) and fight other people who entered, and it wasn't an elimination tournament so you could still fight others even if it was determined you lost.

Here's what Chester looked like for SDL:

And while he didn't participate in the tournament as an entrant, Chester as his normal robot self was also in spectator entries as a side character in a tournament named Infractus Fatality!

As for Charlie, I sadly only made him in the last few years or so, well after the OCT scene on dA had largely died. Not to mention I left dA due to their AI bs shortly after I made him, so even if OCTs were still a thing on there I probs wouldn't have stuck around for it. ;w;

But MAN he would've been perfect for OCTs!! I literally made him because I was inspired by watching cool stickman fight animations! And in canon he's a living weapon, he was engineered specifically for combat and blowing stuff up! If there were any characters I could have sent into a situation where they have to fight other characters for survival or a wish or what have you, it should've been him! But alas, I made him way too late.

People still run OCTs on discord and... i think twitter, these days? But idk, I don't really like being on twitter and discord is such a closed off space that discoverability is super low.

But man, I can dream...

[capricioussun]

Just wanna say?! Though I never check consistently I am Always thinking about UF Papyrus Monday. I think 'man, is it Monday yet? I wanna see my guy...' and then get so busy with work come monday!!! So :) thank you for everything ig

Aaa that's so sweet of you to say!!! And also so real, he is Always on my mind as well ✌️😔

^ I'm showing him all the nice comments and things ppl have said about him, he is surprised and a little overwhelmed!

Special shout out in particular to @/fluo-skeletons for starting it all by wishing a happy uf papyrus monday randomly in that one server, if it weren't for that I would probably...well, I'd still draw uf papyrus too much but there wouldn't be an established schedule that we can celebrate together <3

[iinryer]

"don't you just want to have fun" is so true about 911 fans...so many people just hate so many characters and so many things about the show...why are you watching!!

yeah 😭 at a certain point it’s just like, idk man. everything in real life sucks so monumentally why can’t we just watch tv together and have fun

[anders-holmvik]

something something noodling on buck and eddie and forced boundaries. this is word salad btw with no real argument but hopefully its a side that not too many people have written. (written before 8x03-06 airing. so if im completely wrong there will be egg on my face and that is okay because almost nothing is unequivocally true in creative media analysis world.) and also this is super long sorry

i keep thinking about the way they merge buck and eddie's storylines in 7x05, not just on screen in their encounter at the restaurant, but thematically.

first, a really important part of the buck and eddie dynamic is that the two are having an intense emotional affair, and have been since season 3. but, they've always operated across the lines of plausible deniability and they're both likely oblivious to this. they're both "straight." so, anything they do can be chalked up to normalbestfriendbehavior, because there's no way they'd ever physically cheat with each other. they both consider that to be the threshold for cheating, as evidenced by buck and eddie's agreeance that he is not cheating on marisol with kim because they haven't had sex.

7x05 is titled "you don't know me," and that's the central theme for everyone. the episode is mostly about hen and karen, but also continues to weave buck, eddie, and tommy together.

there's the "eddie doesn't know about buck's sexuality exploration and buck feels guilty about this" aspect, but this applies to eddie's solo storyline too.

eddie finds out that marisol used to be a nun. he claims that this has unearthed his catholic guilt, but we know that it never really went away for him, it just became easier for him to repress himself. eddie, even though he claims to not be actively a believer, knows that he is lying to himself about being into marisol, and thinks that god has sent him a reminder that he's watching him. even if he doesn't consciously understand that it's because he's not into women as a whole, he realized his tendency to stay in relationships where he's not happy from his breakup with ana. so he Has to know that he's not genuinely in it. this is also why buck's pointing out that she voluntarily left the convent doesn't bring him any comfort- because he's already decided that marisol is a direct link to god and His disappointment in eddie (as evidenced by his vision of marisol as the virgin mary)

eddie can't have sex with her anymore, the one activity that, to him, proves he's at least attracted to his partner. he's fully prepared to break up with marisol over this, and even hides out at buck's.

buck doesn't realize this at the time because he's too focused on his own guilt, but eddie is looking for his approval to break up with marisol. eddie always does what buck thinks is best for him. he makes the excuse that it's because they're best friends and he trusts his opinion, but i think he knows there's something more to it.

but buck can't give him his approval. because buck cannot fathom that eddie is offering himself up because the idea of marisol is standing between them. the two of them are similar in this way, and that's why they're so fascinating: they're both extremely passive in their romantic pursuits because they lack 1. self esteem and 2. awareness to pursue what they actually want. buck because of his childhood/past relationships and eddie because of his upbringing/grief/repression

buck (and also eddie, but specifically buck) is a huge flirt. however, he'll rarely cross the boundary of platonic activity before the other person does (i genuinely think the last time was abby, but that was his first relationship so its weird hybrid of active and passive tendencies).

he'll flirt and flirt until the other person makes a move, i.e. asking him out or kissing him. he wants them to prove they're choosing him. once they do, he clings. they broke this pattern with his breakup from taylor (even though i consider that a special circumstance) and natalia by having buck leave them, but T may be a return to form. more on that later...

eddie offers himself to buck by letting him choose if he should break up with marisol. buck is oblivious to it because he's too focused on his own guilt of keeping a part of himself "unknown" from eddie. buck confesses about tommy. eddie does not comment on buck's sexuality, he is only surprised at tommy's. buck looks for reassurance there: is it weird that i was on a date with a man? eddie, in his attempt to offer comfort, re-draws the line between them: "this doesn't change a thing between us." what he means is that he's not weirded out, but what buck hears is "i'm straight, so don't even try it."

so, when eddie, who is subconsciously looking for buck to step over the line, asks him about what he thinks he should do, buck doubles down on wanting tommy. eddie, hearing the message, encourages buck to try again. eddie goes home and hits the restart button on his relationship with marisol. he convinces himself that maybe if they start over, it'll work this time.

he tells her that he feels like he doesn't know her well and that they moved too fast. normally, people in this type of situation would just move on and find someone else. but instead, eddie is desperate to stay in this relationship with marisol because buck has stepped over the line of plausible deniability in their relationship, and drawn a new one. buck is officially attracted to men. if eddie's relationship falls apart and buck is not with someone else, the lines start to blur.

later, buck and T get coffee. tommy points out that the two of them don't know anything about each other. they agree to start their relationship and do it "right." the same way eddie and marisol agree to reset theirs.

and the two of them cling to these relationships. marisol ends her and eddie's relationship after finding out about kim. buck remains with tommy despite awkward dates, likely because he is also excited to explore himself (as he is one to do) but also likely because he walked close to that line when he came out to eddie, and felt like he was pushed back.

but i think the sentiment of "you don't know me" really applies for buck and T's relationship as a whole. again, they started with buck flirting and toeing the line until T stepped over it by kissing him, then asking him out.

there's a whole lot of discourse on here and twitter about t's awkward flirting, flippant attitude, and dismissive comments. the thing about this is, likely none of it is tommy purposely trying to hurt buck. tommy does not know buck. he doesn't know that these are things that he is sensitive about, or that hurts him. and buck doesn't communicate when he's uncomfortable. he just internalizes it and focuses on trying to make his partners stay. and tommy will not know buck. buck ingratiates tommy in his life by inviting him to family events, but he doesn't actually open up to tommy or tell him when he's misreading him. it gives both of them a sense of false intimacy.

they're three months in at least, and tommy and buck are still, as oliver said, "getting to know each other." but they both agreed to "get to know each other" and go for it at their coffee date, and here they are months later. not having moved... i hope that holding back his own baggage is going to bite buck in the ass just as much as tommy's past is.

(and by god i hope it is tommy's racist past that gets revealed because FUCK him. but based on what oliver said about buck weighing if he should make it work im not sure they're going to address it. bc if buck found that out i do think he'd end the relationship w little/no debate)

but this is all very interesting to me.. personally i want to see buck explore his sexuality on his own for a little because i think it would be beautiful and he deserves that but i do think he is going to be a little desperate to stay in this relationship if they don't go the gerrard/tommy past route.. but god buck and eddie are so awesomely freakish about each other sometimes

[notlivys]

there's never enough of 1d supporting lgbt rights and me speaking about it so here we go. 🌈 HAPPY COMING OUT DAY Y'ALL !!!

just stumbled upon this amazing video by obviously @freddiesmyqueen - since her videos are not available anymore, i almost screamed of joy when this appeared on my dash, shout-out to the person who translated and uploaded it tho <3 - about the always wonderful #rainbowdirection project by @takemehomefromnarnia and burst into tears and got inspired and emotional all at once AND since this is the post-too-much app here i am.

i remember very vividly the child i used to be watching the one direction videos. but i remember even more vividly the overwhelming feeling of boiling shame i had within me for being who i was.

i remember the version of myself that tried and tried tirelessly to fit into the molds of others' beliefs and

every trash principle i had heard since i was old enough to comprehend hateful words. i remember the version who hated and tried to hide her inner self every single day of her life. i remember how it hurt to look into the mirror and see someone i wasn't, because i felt like an impostor.

but i knew, deep down i always knew.

then i discovered people. i started to live and discovered friends, idols. i found a love, too. i saw people holding rainbows signs. i saw people speaking up for those who couldn't.

on the other side, i remember very vividly the little fangirl i was and probably will always be. i remember the first time i felt excitement for a musical release. i remember joining fandom for the first time and i am very gladly i can still be a part of it, even in adulthood.

and to that girl, with too much love for pop stars and too much shame for herself, you can't imagine how important it was to see the people she looked up to affirming that love wins.

in my personal experience, coming out took a really long time. years and years of reflection and distance, but i always knew i could not hate the closeted version of me anymore, because i was not the wrong one. i feel pity for the way i hid, but i no longer resent it.

now, in 2024, still struggling with not being looked at the same way by close people, i still have this too much love for pop stars but now i am so unbelievably proud of who i am. so unbelievably proud of that little kid. for being brave enough to love, for questioning everything and never give up.

with time, i've learned that love gives you freedom.

sometimes they say nah, no one cares if a public person supports and speaks about lgbtq+ rights.

but actually yes, how important it is that the people you admire so strongly remind you that love wins. because love is love and it is freedom and it should be safety. i dream to live to see the moment when love also means being able to do it without a single fear.

every time harry raised a flag in 2015 and every time he raises one now; every time louis wore a rainbow or supports a fan who is afraid. there is always someone i admire reminding me that love is love. that helps pride — at least my pride. that is pride.

they see me and i see them.

and i love them, honestly. always have, always will.

happy coming out day everyone. make yourself proud 🌈❤️‍🩹

[miodiodavinci]

anyway as for the long and short of how i'm doing currently (mostly the long)

so two weeks ago i sprained my wrist at work lifting boxes, and it's been a slow recovery even with the help of a brace, stretches, rice buddies, and ice packs. i've had to basically put a lot of my hobbies on hold because i've been saving what little i can do with my wrist for all the job prep i need to do on the weekends (i.e. making flyers, updating spreadsheets, creating presentations, moving more boxes, etc...)

hobbies are even further on hold at this point because this last week i injured my shoulder as well, and i can feel that my ankle is getting ready to go with it. i'm doing what i can to minimize the damage (i.e. got a work cart, have had coworkers come with me to storage, actually sitting down and resting when i'm on break, etc...) but there's not a lot that can be done considering these are Core Aspects of my job and my contract goes until spring (and also like. whole complex situation where i can't leave without screwing over myself and a lot of people i care about)

it's a shit situation all around, but at the very least i'm getting paid a reasonable amount and it's covering my expenses jfgjksdhkfg

(though for all the work i do, god oh god i wish it was doing more than just covering my expenses)

having to take a break from my hobbies has put me in a weird headspace, though. or like it's less of a weird headspace and more that there's finally this pause that has me reevaluating what i want to do in my spare time

i've been consumed by work for the past like four years of my life, this last year was kind of the culmination of that. between completing my internship, finishing my degree, surviving The Horror (read: had a really, truly horrifying cancer scare last year), doing the yamaha collab, and taking care of the flurry of job-hunting stuff that needed to be done post-graduation, i don't know if i actually got a chance to so much as breathe until august

. . . . except in august i immediately collapsed and rotted the entire month away skjdfhgkhsdf

i'm burnt out, i think. like. genuinely, really severely burnt out. the more i think about it, the more i feel like i just need a year of doing nothing.

just. absolutely nothing.

which i've told myself in the past. several times. always in a big showy way. so much so that i feel silly saying it now because i've been saying it for years in the descriptions of my videos and in posts on my blog.

"i'm tired of being beholden to past me!! this year, i'm letting go of my expectations for myself and just doing what i want!!" (<< this user has said this at least 7 separate times and has failed to make good on it every single time)

but i think why i've never been able to follow through is because in spite of all the dropping projects that no longer interested me and not feeling obligated to see everything through, i still held on to the expectation that at the end of it, i'd still post something. but like.

i think posting doesn't really matter to me as much anymore??? if at all???

which isn't to say "i'm putting my foot down and never creating any new vocaloid work ever again," but it's also like. i can't let myself sit with the expectation of "yeah i'll just make things for fun!! and when they're done, i'll post them!!' because that changes the focus from making something for me into making something for others to see, which is. a different beast to care for skdjfgklhsdlfg

i keep seeing a lot of things where i have the opportunity to keep building on what rice and i were able to make as part of the yamaha collab: alternate box arts, matching galaco design, cool new english covers featuring bespoke cover art of the new designs but when i think of starting those, i feel utterly drained, and when i think of how i'll feel once they're finished, i imagine it'll be akin to "alright, i've checked that off the list. what's the next thing i should do not disappear and be a failure?"

. . . . . which is really, really separate from doing things as a hobby because they make me happy OTL

this past year i've really reconnected with my close friends (in part because i stopped having time to scroll online and didn't want anyone to know when i was online because i legitimately did not have the energy to respond) and i've noticed i really truly enjoy just batting around our ocs with each other so more than i've enjoyed any of the vocaloid work that i've put out in the past five years skjfghldkfg

i've been doing vocaloid things for over ten years now, and the collaboration with yamaha was quite literally something i couldn't have even dreamed of, much less imagined it would have just fallen into my lap the way it did. coming off the end of it and my internship though, there's this feeling that's been building for years now where it feels like the effort i put in is just not proportional to the satisfaction i get out of it. it feels more like something i'm supposed to do otherwise i'd just be squandering all the work i've put in and all the attention i've gotten.

. . . . . . i just want to live man 😂 i'm caught in a mental tangle that feels difficult to unravel. spring mio was at the end of his fucking rope, but fall mio is finally has the time to sit down with the slack and is wondering if it's worth it to keep pulling for all i'm worth when i can always just go over to my friend's house and have a funny little sleep over (metaphorical or literal both apply)

i'm not decided by any means but i'm definitely thinking about it.

it's the fact that it's been 2 years since i've released salvador, and i went into it thinking i'd be cool and professional about it, with lots of covers and frequent updates because i used to make lots of UTAU covers in high school, but then i got paralyzed by all the "shoulds" wrapped up in the process and i just. stopped working.

when i say i want to make X cover of Y song, am i really saying that i want to go out of my way to do all these things?? or am i just imagining what momentary satisfaction i'll feel to see another thumbnail on my channel??

...

(face in hands) this ended up being. a lot fucking longer than i meant for it to be jksdfhlkghsdkfg

hopefully most people have clicked away by this point w

it's the tear between the things i genuinely want (making things with friends that stay between us friends) the things i kind of want out of necessity (opening up commissions so i can supplement my income), the things i said i'd do and can't back out now on, and the things i told myself i would do but can't really must up plenty of positive emotions about (but can feel plenty of frightful, guilty emotions when i think of not doing them)

i'll figure it out eventually. even in the worst case scenario, i plan to keep my accounts up as archives, so it's not like my work will go anywhere w i'd still want it to be there once i decide i'm ready to come back to it w

[kitnita]

well, let's leave this all behind us on the road

ty dellandrea, gm jim nill agreed ‘it was time’ to part ways ahead of trade to san jose by lia assimakopoulos for the dallas morning news, june 24, 2024; jake oettinger & ty dellandrea on locker cleanout day via the dallas stars, june 4, 2024; "october" by HAPPY LANDING; dallas stars vs. san jose sharks in dallas, texas on october 15, 2024; ty dellandrea & jake oettinger pose for jake's 100th win on february 29, 2024 via the dallas stars; stars’ jake oettinger and ty dellandrea share a special bond: ‘we’ve done it all’ by saad yousuf for the athletic, may 29, 2023; jake oettinger is at home with the stars by matthew defranks for the dallas morning news, october 10, 2022; jake oettinger & ty dellandrea pose with their first nhl goal & first nhl win pucks via jeff toates, january 28, 2021; jake oettinger on ty dellandrea after game 4 vs. vegas, april 29, 2024; "blue" by laura elliot; saad yousuf for the athletic, may 29, 2023; jake oettinger & ty dellandrea on the bench after practice via the dallas stars, march 8, 2024; "rearview" by brenn!; jake oettinger with his arm around ty dellandrea after game 5 vs. vegas via trey hill, may 27, 2023; saad yousuf for the athletic, may 29, 2023; lia assimakopoulos for the dallas morning news, june 24, 2024; sharks sign ty dellandrea for nhl.com, july 4, 2024; ty dellandrea cradling jake oettinger's face via jake oettinger's instagram, june 19, 2024; "rearview" by brenn!; jake oettinger & ty dellandrea before morning skate via saad yousuf, january 10, 2024; jake oettinger on ty dellandrea after game 4 vs. vegas, april 29, 2024; jake oettinger & ty dellandrea pose with their first nhl goal & first nhl win pucks via jake oettinger's instagram, january 28, 2021; saad yousuf for the athletic, may 29, 2023; "october" by HAPPY LANDING.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

have i mentioned how great cats are. there's a lil guy in my house and when i lay my head on her side she starts purring so hard <3 and ten seconds later she will try to open my wrist with her teeth <3 truly the best <3

[hiemaldesirae]

whoopsie daisy sorry for going MIA for a bit guys im just grinding TWST en