#sorry I just need to vent bc I don’t understand the love for her at all

[haribojam]

Steffy stop being a asshole towards Wally when YOU are the one that always wanted him in missions even though he never wanted to be a government spy challenge: IMPOSSIBLE (she died instantly)

[keraxxx]

HIII could you do something where the reader tells bf!ethan how bad her days was and told him someone was really mean and upset with her and they end up going missing the next day bc ethan obviously killed them?

A/N: Hi and of course! This idea is perfect! I’ve been wanting to write something like this omg. I hope you enjoy!

————

No one can hurt you.

Ethan Landry x Fem!reader

Warnings: crying, mentions of bullying, cursing, description or murder, not proof read.

————

God you were tired. After that long day at college you couldn’t take it, especially after that one girl keeps running her mouth. She always would talk shit about you and it ruined your day. You just needed to see Ethan and talk to him, hold you for at least a second. So that’s what you did, you went to visit him.

You walk to his dorm and gently knock on his door, trying hard not to get anger and pound on it. You wait patiently as you hear shuffling inside.

Ethan opens the door confused bit his face immediately lights up he was so happy to see you. You were his girlfriend and he loved you more than anything in the whole entire world. “Hey baby.. are you okay?” He frowns as he sees your eyes swell up like tears. He invites you inside immediately, his dorm mate no where to be seen.

“Ethan.. I can’t take this anymore.” You finally let out a sob as he takes you into his arms. “Baby.. what wrong?” Ethan hugs you tightly and rests his head on top of yours in an attempt to comfort you. You couldn’t form any words, you just cried. “Shh.. calm down and explain to me what happened.” He brings you to his bed and sits you down.

“This stupid bitch!” You yelled. “She-she won’t stop talking shit about me! What did i do to her? I just need someone to explain to me what the hell i did!” You vented and sobbed. Ethan just say in silence, listening to your cries. “I can’t stand her! I want her to disappear! Maybe then all these people will stop ruining my day with these stupid insults and rumors.” You wipe your face and look at Ethan.

His face was twisted into a frown, his brows furrowed. You could tell he was mad, words couldn’t even explain how he felt right now. “That’s interesting.” Is all he says as he holds your hand, his other caressing your face. “I need you to calm down.” He says calmly, his eyes look innocent but you can tell something inside him had just snapped.

You breathe in and out a few times. “I’m sorry..” He shakes his head. “No need to apologize I understand.” Ethan hugs you again and your arms wrap around his neck. “God i’m so sorry.. I just wish it was me and you.” You say softly into his ear.

“Don’t worry.. it’ll be okay.” He says as he pulls away to kiss you softly.

————

After you had left, Ethan was sitting in his room, his hands folded into each other. He was moving his knee erratically as he started to think. He didn’t want you to be upset about the girl but he also did want you to be worry for about why she was going to go missing the next day.

“Fuck it.”

————

You where scrolling in your phone in your bed as a news article popped up. A news article about your college. You immediately read the title.

“Young girl missing in College.”

You scroll down to see the image of the girl. It was her. The girl who always had something to say. Your eyes widened in shock as you gasped. You couldn’t believe it. Maybe the universe was on your side? No, this is bad. You had to show Ethan.

————

“I just can’t believe it! I was just talking about her yesterday right? God this is such a nightmare!” Ethan laid back as he watched you pace around the room nervously. “Everyone must be so worried! Her family, friends! I feel so bad.” You say as you pout and walk over to Ethan. You lay down next to him and you both face each other. “How are you not worried?” You say frowning.

Ethan chuckles. “Why should I be? She was rude.” He smirked before kissing your forehead. “Don’t worry about it.. She probably just passed out drunk somewhere.”

But he knew what you didn’t. He knew that she was screaming in the alleyway last night for help. He knew and you didn’t.

“I would never let anyone hurt you. You know that right?” He smiles softly and innocently.

————

[sopranoentravesti]

Ok I’m FINALLY in a place where I have a minute and brain space to recount some of my Convention highlights:

I got 2 hugs from Nana Visitor. And she told me I look good as a Bajoran, asked me what I do, and when I told her, she asked what I do to take care of myself.

I also got told by multiple people that my eyes look similar to Nana’s (brown eyes next to the nose ridge?)

On Saturday, I wore my Kippah with my cosplay, going from Morning Services to Convention.

At one point, Robert Picardo was talking and John Billingsley was crouching down in order to surprise him and his face turned red. I thought he was having a heart attack.

I put my hand on his shoulder and was like “sir, are you okay,” until someone was like “he’s fine he’s just heckling Bob Picardo.”

Thankfully, he didn’t notice

I was a bit late for my photo with the (present) members of the DS9 cast. They had to bring Penny Johnson-Jerald back, but everyone was very gracious, understanding, and sweet.

“Who am I taking a picture with! Oh my goodness, you are too cute,” she (Penny Johnson-Jerald) also wanted to know my first and last name

They stationed Rosie, my Rollator, “center seat.” Terry Farrell complimented my vest, which I crocheted myself, and very excitedly told me she just learned how to crochet.

(I commented that despite my disability, I am unable to sit still and was taught to cope with hyperactivity and keep myself from fidgeting too bad).

J.G. Hertzler at one point approached me and was like “that [my Rollator] looks handy! Can I take a seat?” And growl chuckled and clapped my shoulder ( Klingon friendly style) when I was like “that is not honorable.”

Later he stopped me again. Apparently, one of his loved ones has MS, uses a rollator, but unlike Rosie, hers is not upright, and they are worried about it contributing to back problems. He wanted to know more, how to find one.

I asked Siddig a somewhat rambling question about Julian’s disability, Eugenics, and how that may have affected his relationship to other disabled characters, and disability in trek vs our Society as a whole.

I had my hand up for a minute and he was like “relax, you got next question” I was kind of embarrassed but then he was like “I don’t think you’re hyperactive, I just want you to not exhaust yourself“

He listened attentively, and he gave a vent like answer where he was like “I see your concerns about Star Trek obscuring / erasing disability… my general thoughts are that we are all racist (i was born in Arab Africa, in Sudan, riddled by geopolitical conflicts, Africans are also racist) we are all ableist, and all have the potential to be disabled . And unfortunately, it’s your job to appeal to me as an able bodied person, and my job to appeal to [another audience member] as a brown person …And why we need to work to change laws first, before we work on everything else. Sorry, didn’t mean to get all political.”

Later, I was sitting outside the venue for mingling because of autism ears and photosensitivity.

And he approached me and was like “hey, how are you doing? I just wanted to check in on you.”

Naturally, I aspirated my saliva and stammered something about avoiding the noise and migraines.

I didn’t think he remembered my name (one point I was attempting to steer around him and he was like “so sorry, sweet thing,”) but later when he was signing my autograph! He did! I did have to spell it, but I usually do anyways bc it’s spelled not the typical way.

At one point, I dropped a change of clothes I had packed and Bonnie Gordon came up to me “Darling, I thought your days as a stripper were over.”

Thank goodness I developed a tolerance for making a damn fool of myself.

There’s so much more. I met many cool people, including several folks I knew previously only on tumblr (hi, @xenobotanist @philosopherking1887 @cardassiangoodreads @ettaberrytea and multiple others I am forgetting just now) I got to hang out IRL with some people from the SidCity Social Club, which previously I only lurked at.

I’m still absolutely filled up with warmth. Like I can take anything

[taiiunknown]

✨TONIGHT, ILL BE THE BEST YOU EVER HAD 💍

This a short story inspired by the song (Tonight ~ John legend) so I advise you to listen to the song while reading 😽

Warning: FLUFF AND I MEAN LOTS OF IT , grab a tissue 🥺, very short story sorry not sorry 😛

Summary: Y/n & SHURI has been dating for 3 years and shuri finally decide to propose Aka tie the knot 🪢💍🤭

Today shuri has been acting really weird today, I don’t know what’s up with her but she have been real distant and sneaky and I really don’t want to jump to conclusions bc we have been strong going on 4years and it has been the best 4 years of you life .

Shuri told me that she was gonna be busy all today so she might not be home at 4 like she usually do , so I decided to go to my best friend house to vent to her a bit and also catch up , but she thought it was a good idea to treat me today which was very odd but I guess she just wanted to be nice today so we ended up at the nail shop .

*NAIL SALON*

“I feel like you overreacting.” Cari said while looking at the lady who was painting her toe nails, “Ya, Maybe you’re right…I just want to know what’s wrong.” Y/n said while having her feet in the water while the nail tech finish her pinky finger (you got cute white French tips medium length with a little diamond on you ring finger). “Just enjoy the day we having together then tonight when you go home talk to shuri.” Cari said with a small smile “ya… I am, what we doing after anyways ?” Y/n asked “oh we fixing your hair so when we don’t you better get to picking hair styles , I Feel like you need a cute silk press since your hair already long asl .” Cari said “ok even though I love my curls” I said laughing .

*3hours later*

I felt like a brand new person walking back in the palace, After getting my hair and nails done , including a Brazilian wax , I felt so pure and fresh.

On the way here I was already planning in my head on how to confront shuri about her being to distant , as I got closer the living area I seen rose petals leading to the balcony by the kitchen, I hear (Tonight by John legend) playing in the back ground and was easily caught off guard by how sexy shuri look right now . She was wearing a all black long sleeve shit with gray buttons, all dark gray pants with black shoes and … WAIT A MINUTE DID SHE GET A LINE UP IN THE BACK ?!!?!?!!

Ughhhh god take me now …

Mean while i have on a cute black dress and cute black rhinestone flip flops since I didn’t expect to be doing much today,

“Shuri what’s all this for ?” I asked looking at the set up in awe (just imagine what you want) “for you Usana, you deserve this and everything that comes with it” shuri said lifting my chin so I can focus on her “including you? Bc last time I checked you was being real distant to me for the past couple of days like you don’t love me anymore , and I’m really tryna understand if I did something wrong or not so I can fix it or even m-” I said rambling non stop “ MY LOVE STOP !” Shuri said to stop me from rambling “You did nothing wrong y/n , I just been planning something special for you that I have been thinking about since the first moment we met, And don’t ever think about changing yourself okay ? Bc you are perfect and I love you with everything in my heart and I don’t want you to ever think I stopped loving you bc I will never stop loving you Mami , Do you hear me? And I’m so sorry for even making you feel that way Nkosazana yam (my princess) . Shuri said while we both tearing up a little

“Ever since I first laid eyes on you I’ve been having it all planned out y/n and even my mother knew we are soul mates before she passed..” Shuri says while slowly moving on to one knee … lord I’m finna fall out

“So will you please make me that happiest Queen alive and be my wife sithandwa sam ?”

Shuri asked with a few tears running down her face while I’m straight out finna blow a snot bubble 💀

“YES ! Yes my shuri, I will” I say sobbing a little

“YES ?!!” Shuri asks shooting back up to her feet while picking me up “YES BABY!” I say giggling bc I’m so star struck. Shuri begans to scream in happiness and I do the same.

Shuri puts me back on the ground to place the ring on my finger (imagine what you want)

“And by the way Cari was in on the plan” Shuri says with a sneaky grin “Wowww I knew she was up to something” I say laughing “yk you look really good right now Ms.Uduka” Shuri says while grabbing me by my waist “MEEE?? You look fine as always while I literally have on the most simple fit ever” I say rolling my eyes and pouting, “it’s ok if you don’t see what I see Usana, But do you mind not walking tmr ?” Shuri says getting closer to my lips “umm..it depends how good you do” I say clearly joking bc she be fucking me up for real. “Say less enomtsalane (sexy)…

THE END !!

[hyuckswoman]

don’t regret venting it’s healthy and healing (i regret opening my mouth 90% of the time lol) but in the spirit of moving on you have me out here kicking my feet and giggling like i’m in middle school with the way mark talks on priv. i’m out here messaging my friends like I NEED ME A MAN LIKE THIS i like how they’re both equally down bad and i feel like a cheater to my bias (i’m so sorry haechan but it’s mark you understand more than anyone cmon it’s MARK) also when 200 came out??? and then recently renjun’s song he released on 5/20 and then also the jirenlehyuck song all within the same month. (i have cried an unhealthy amount to all of these songs) anywayyyyy any plans to incorporate 200 into the story now 👀 (imma still be here we just move past the sad stuff but don’t regret it okay? you’ve gained a lot of new people who care about you) 🧸

no bc we're the same then

and yea mark turning into y/n on his priv is soooo funny and like how he flirts with her and seems so composed when he's freaking out on the priv??

(also it's okie this whole story is made from someone whose username is hyuck's woman)

pleaseee you're rela for crying tho!! and idkkk (i don't know if you read this before or after tonights chapter but I'll let you figure our what you need to figure out 🤭)

and yea it's crazy how many people care for my wellbeing on there I love you all thank you saurrr muchhhh I'll be better I SWEAR!!

[vngelicc]

vent warning - sorry, you’re just my comfort account on here and i don’t have anyone else to talk to. I’ve just seen other people rant to you before so i thought it’d be okay? if it’s not i totally understand, you can just ignore this. but I apologize for bothering, i just need someone as of now.

so my ex-best friend replaced me for a girl she’s only known for 1-3 months and she’s known me for a over a year.

today, I texted her that I didn’t wanna be friends with her no more because what can I do about being replaced?

she asked me why, I told her, and a few mins after we talked, she posted a video with the girl she replaced me with. mind you, that video was made on a DIFFERENT day. she could’ve posted it any offer day but she decided to post it the day I talked to her about how I felt about being replaced.

so, I said fuck it because that’s petty and she knows what she’s doing. mind you, my paragraph was sincere and genuine. It was passive aggressive nor rude. she said no “beef” either but she knows what she’s doing posting that on the same day when the vid was recorded on a different day?

so I told her I just don’t wanna be friends with her at all. At first, we settled on being acquaintances, but since she did that I just didn’t wanna be her friend no more.

she said that she’s “sorry” and she “understands” why I don’t wanna be friends with her no more. by the way, the ratio between my texts & hers was literally insane because she was giving me one sentence per text and I was giving paragraphs and multiple texts…

and she decides to act “nonchalant” and she’s one of those people who think that nonchalant people are weird? yet she’s doing that to me?

basically, ever since she became friends with that other girl, who is a bad influence, she stopped caring about every other friend around her, including me, who was her closest.

she’s also changed a lot and she’s grown meaner. she also rubbed their friendship in my face whenever me and her used to call.

im so sorry, I just really needed someone to talk to because it just pisses me off and hurts me a lot. im the only one affected by our friendship being thrown away while she couldn’t care less.

honestly fuck her u deserved better and STILL do. fren im feeling as if she secretly been like this all along, but my thing is bitches like these piss me off cause like what are you her little lapdog? idk how she might have been before but this person just brought it out of her lol, like her true self. good that u cut things off with her, let her have her new friend and let her slowly realize on her own how everyone else is gonna leave her behind and she’s gonna b stuck with her new bestie bc she chose to cut everyone off with her weird ass behavior. im sorry this happened to you lovely, and i do sincerely hope that you can meet someone else who will make you feel better and won’t treat you like she did. 🫂🫂🫂🩷

[deludedcrayon]

just going to vent for a little bit please don’t reply if ur just going to judge

i cook dinner for christmas every year for my family because i genuinely enjoy it even if it is a lot of work. i was especially excited about this year because i was going to make two new dishes, and i put on the shopping list that we needed parmesan and told my mom we were all out of it. my mom forgot it and it was the main ingredient for one of my new dishes. i started crying because i literally fucking have bpd and have trouble regulating my emotions, and honestly, my family doesn’t even do decorations or presents anymore, so this dinner is really all i have. immediately my dad yells at me not to “ruin christmas” and my mom doesn’t even apologize or acknowledge the fact that she forgot something. i’m not blaming her, i know these things happen, but i feel like a simple sorry would be common courtesy because everyone knows how seriously i take this cooking. my brother was the only one who took me seriously, he went out to whatever stores were open and searched for it until my mom called him back bc he couldn’t find any. at this point, even though it’s what started it, i’m not even mad or distressed about the missing ingredient. i’m just tired because i can hear my parents complaining abt me in swahili, thinking i don’t understand even though i can hear them saying “exaggerating” “[my name]” “crying.” i’m just tired of the lack of support from them. i’m working with my therapist on my coping mechanisms and dbt, but it’s still hard accepting the fact that my parents will never understand me. no matter how much they say they support me because they give me a place to live and my mom “claims” to understand bpd, it’s obvious they don’t because they judge me when i have these emotional moments and don’t even bother to try to talk to me. i know it’s small, i know it’s not a big deal, i know i’m overreacting, i don’t need someone to lie to me and say that it’s the end of the world, i just need someone to understand that it feels that way to me. i feel so taken for granted for in this house. would they even love me if i didn’t provide use? if i didn’t take my meds and stay sober for them? if i didn’t go to school for them and work the job they made me do? if i didn’t cook for them every holiday? i don’t even feel happy about the holiday anymore. i don’t have any decorations or traditions, i don’t have any presents to give or recieve, i don’t have any affection to give or recieve, and now i feel like my dinner is ruined (even though logically i know it’s not). i’m just tired. i think about that quote about how u can’t heal in the same place that broke you. all i look forward to is c-**ing myself. what’s the point of even trying anymore i just have to get out of here before im so mutilated i have nowhere else to go.

[sturnioloshacker]

idk if it’s ok to vent to you but if it isn’t i completely understand and you just don’t have to respond to this, but lately my mom has been bringing up my dad so so much. like my dad is still present in my life but he has a new gf and he’s been leaving me in the past basically and never even seeing me, and my mom thinks it’s ok to bring up ‘oh he don’t love you’ n shit like that everytime she’s mad and it lowkey makes me js wanna pack my shit n leave. and i tried talking to her abt it and she gave me a shitty apology and brushed it off as if i don’t have feelings. and today was my dads wedding and i don’t have a car yet so she had to pick me up and before she picked me up she said ‘did you take any pics from the wedding’ and i said no so she said ‘ok then find a different way home.’ which is so unfair so i literally had to beg her to drive me home. and i’m honestly js thinking abt leaving tn, but like idk yet bc i still love my mom but she’s really not showing any ‘love’ back.

oh i’m so sorry you’re dealing with all of this my love. my best advice would be to try and talk to your mum and tell her how you’re really feeling and how much she’s hurting you.

no matter how much you wanna leave, you still need your mum as a form of guidance in life. it’s all about communication and making sure your mum understands where you’re coming from. tell her every single little detail.

she could also be hurting from the fact that your dad has moved on in life and she’s choosing to take her frustrations on someone else in her life which is sadly you. she may be finding it hard to adjust to this new life and now that your dad has remarried, she’s heartbroken, hurt, possibly depressed and just simply lost and the only thing she can really do is just be angry and upset.

the main thing is to just talk to her. you never know, she might actually open up to you and tell you how she feels about it all. the more feelings you let out between each other, the more likely you’ll become closer, stronger and tighter.

hope things work out for you and your mum sweetheart, you got this. i believe in you 🩷

fyi, vent all you want! i’m always here to listen and help when you need it most x

[gothamslostboy]

OOH WEBS MATCHMAKE ME ITLL BE FUN:):)

I’m 5’ 10” with long brown wavy hair and bright green eyes:)

I think my style is just very feminine? Lots of dresses, skirts, and floral:)

My favorite foods are pho and smoked salmon

ANY GENDER HOMIE

I love to read, write, and paint

I’m into very indie folk, woodsy stuff like hozier, fleet foxes, Pheobe Bridgers, Father john misty… very ethereal stuff

Favorite animals are cats🥺

My favorite movie is Dead Poets Society (I like coming of age movies)

I’m really passionate, creative, and friendly:)

She/her

I don’t understand the fandom question sorry I’m dumb😭 match me w whoever

Libra, Leo, Libra:)

In a partner I would want someone who’s a good listener because I process things by talking through them, but who wouldn’t wanna fix stuff for me bc that would annoy me. Someone somewhat well read who could go to bookstores and art museums, and someone sensitive and creative

Hi big sis! Your not dumb, I just need to go back and clarify. The fandom question is for which movie/show someone wants:] I’m gonna go with the lost boys bc I’m assuming that’s what you want haha

I SHIP YOU WITH:

Marko! I know you expected Paul, but I can explain:] I hope you’ll like it

Marko loves art museums, like an unhealthy amount. He is always begging to go with someone, but the only one willing to go is max. He did go with Max one time and it was alright, but it was apparent Max was trying to pretend to know more than he did. So as soon as Marko realizes you want to go he’s scooping you on to his bike and driving. When you’re there, regardless of how much you know about art Marko is great to talk to. Dont know a ton about a specific style or era? Ask away bc he knows it! You know about it? Great! He’d love to hear your thoughts and discuss with you about what the artist was trying to convey

I believe Marko has a side of him most don’t expect. This shows up at the museum and later on appears more in your relationship. He’s actually freaky smart. Like if he was human he could have been a doctor if he tried a bit. He’s never had a huge interest in reading, but has several Italian books he reads every couple years. If you picked out a book for him and he likes it, then he’s more than happy to go to bookstores with you and let you expand his collection. You might have to remind him every couple days that he has the book, but when he finishes it get ready for 1 hour+ conversations about each one.

Marko is a Great listener, but not a great problem solver. So this works out great! He’ll have you sit next to or in front of him and vent while he plays with your hair, holds your hands, kisses your head, occasionally telling you he loves you and he’s sorry you’re upset. He has really big feelings, so when someone is upset he can relate and does his best to cheer you up, but he knows he has poor execution when handling problems and leaves that to others.

Marko likes skirts and dresses bc he can twirl you around. If you choose to turn, he buys a jacket and paints flower designs on it that match your favorite dress. Maybe he adds matching ones to a pair of shoes

He won’t admit it, but adores that you’re a bit taller than him, it makes him the perfect height for your neck

Marko listens to all kinds of music and gets really inspired by ethereal things, he’ll probably ask if you want to draw together while listening to one of your playlists

He’s obsessed with your eyes by the way, you’re gonna catch him just staring at them, 25% of the time drawing you. He always adds emphasis on the eyes though.

He’s gonna do anything to see you smile, including getting a cat. He makes sure he gets one that is bird friendly though:]

[taegularities]

You know what? I will feel so empty without them. Discovered them in March 2022 (yes one of my biggest regret in my life). Since then i never once stop talking about them to my friend, i was harrassing her lmao giving her daily updates even if she doesn’t care. I once said that i only breath rnb but i can also say today that i breath bangtan.

Bangtan help me filled a missing piece in my love life? In some way, they were helping me to escape reality. Before knowing them i never once dated someone (still don’t) and to think that i have to face back reality, by confronting the mores of our society and by hoping to find someone who is gonna help me filled that gap, well, yes it hits hard. I am affraid of a lot of things regarding love and relationships in general. I don’t think i have issues nor that i am insecure. With years i started accepting to love myself but i still know that it isn’t enough. Because a part of me says otherwise. An ex friend of mine, once said to me that i was waiting for a partner to accept myself because what i needed was insurance. I feel that it is true. At the same time I might think that « the one » will never appeared to me if i don’t love myself enough. How can i love someone else if i am not even able to love myself? Men that i allowed in my life, played me or didn’t fit my standards. Am i wrong with that? Am i wrong for not giving them a chance to know me or to like me? The more i grow up the more i feel lonely in that society. I felt the lack of affection a lot before bangtan and now that they are gone, i am back to square one. I know that at some point of my life i will have to settle with someone and detached myself from them. For now i don’t have that someone and don’t have them until they are back. But more serioulsy this society pressure me a lot, makes it hard to be fully happy… Not me being so dramatic, i am so sorry. Wanted to vent a bit… tough day. Hope yours wasn’t too harsh tho <3

hi bby. i wanted to be in a headspace where i can answer this properly, but even now, i am at such a loss for words bc i so know what you mean. don't worry about joining 'late' – one idea this fandom has always agreed upon is that you find bangtan just when you're in need of them. i'm not sure how they do that or what the magic behind it is, but they always come into our lives when we need them the most.

and yeah, that's why all of this hurts so much, too! i remember crying my eyes out when last year's festa came out and they announced their hiatus. right now, i feel like it's not quite sinking in that in a few days, they'll all be leaving and be gone at the same time, and it's a harsh reality to cope with. but you know… i find comfort in the thought that they love us just as much (more even, lbr). time is going to pass for them as it will for us, and i promise you they'll be thinking of us every dang moment, so the love, at least, never fades. we'll try our best to be healthy and live our best lives and then come together when they do!! in the meantime, we have each other, so i hope everyone sticks around and holds each other's hand!!

i understand how scary love can be. discovering that people can be kind and so generous raised my standards, too – the boys really did. it's gotten so hard to find someone who fits those expectations, but yk… at some point, we will definitely need to detach ourselves from the idea that every man will be like them. we shouldn't settle for anything less, but we shouldn't reject everyone either who isn't just like them. that's what i've been going with.. the thought to never be able to settle is so freaking scary, but i promise you will!! one day, you'll find someone who fits you just perfectly, and you'll be happy, babe, i can tell you as much. and be as dramatic as you want to be, bc gawd, we're allowed to hurt! i just hope your days get better and that you feel okay as soon as possible. sending you all my love and the tightest hugs, axelle 🥺🤍

[seraphdreams]

https://www.tumblr.com/seraphdreams/734650996278558720/hey-seraph-i-know-i-vented-to-you-about-some

Thanks for letting me vent. It means alot to me. And thanks for showing your boundaries as well. If I ever make you uncomfy please let me know. Its also gonna be really long so I hope you don't mind.

It's just that I've been feeling alot more blue since the wedding becuase its just that ever little noise my (POS) younger brother has been making to trigger like roughly barging into my door so that it jiggles and stomping around for the same effect. Its gotten to a point where I can no longer differtiate between the two. Like he hasn't externally been bothering but he's been doing sly shit like slamming himself against my doorknob to jiggle it (what's the word?) And its not even rough its just softly enough to trigger me. And then hes been coming in to the room I'm in, looking at me as if I'm worth less than the scum is his shoe and leaving and after he's already triggered me in just put even lower in terms of mood and self esteem and he's made me feel like I wa sshit and that I have nothing good about me. And he even did it yesterday when I was trying to sleep and he was rocking back and forth and it was really triggering and I wanted to bang on the wall but I was afraid of him and I didn't want to fight him becisse I was afaird of him banging on my door and the general backlash which could cause a fight pulling my hair out (he does that during fights) and he's always just provking me to try snd fight him just so that he can beat me up. And then there's the fact that I cant talk to nobody about it bc my therapist discharged me for three months (that's their policy) and I'm still on the waiting list for counselling and I can't talk to my mum bc she dont fully understand or says that he doesn't (as much as I love her to bits) and I can't talk with my sister bc the last time I ranted to her about ruining my plans we got into an argument and I blocked her. And then on top of that I traumadumped my sisters best friend (who was my designated friend for the day) becuase she knew about the family drama and I thought it was safe to tell her and I also told her about being flirted with by a guy but I thought it was a joke and she reassured me (said that I was above average - beautiful black girl tm) but then she said that I was insecure and constantly looking for validation which alot of girls don't like and even guys and it makes me realise that I do it alot. And I just keep reacting and giving him a reaction bc I get triggered easily and I just don't know how to properly articulate what I'm feeling bc nobody in my family will even listen to me and even say that I'M the one terrifying him. And I talked with teachers and counsellors about it but they just say that all siblings fight like that.

Can you give me advice on how not give him a reactions. Or how to cope with his bullshit. Also what do I do if I am reacting. Sorry for dumping his on you, I just need someone to tell who will listen and not dismiss me.

i just want to say i’m sorry that all of this is happening and people should not be dismissing you especially the ones that are there to help you. that’s no “sibling fight” that’s straight up abuse. and though i’m not well versed on the subject of siblings, i just think that to stop giving a reaction you should stop caring. if i do remember correctly, you said your brother was younger? in that case, it’s futile to give into him since he’s younger and not important.

let’s switch the narrative here — instead of thinking that you’re the problem, think of his behavior. people who are happy with themselves don’t ruin others’ day. in conclusion, he’s just bitter and acting like a child and in that case he needs to grow up. his actions don’t reflect you.

now all of this won’t happen in a day, and if you find yourself reacting just remember that it’s normal in the healing process to fall back, but that just means you gotta push two steps forward. also find things to distract you or rewire your brain from reacting. when you find him provoking you, just think of something else besides his annoyances. something that makes you happy or calms you down. or just switch your focus to a whole new task/topic

[crowvainn]

sighh, big vent/rant abt my life issues bc im lowkey tweaking 💔

had a mental breakdown bc im stressed about what will happen to me in the futureeee (anxiety! how fun /sarc) and im really unhappy with the fact that my mom will never accept my gender identity (shes islamic…) and i genuinely feel like a piece of shit bc i seem to always act like a ungrateful and selfish bitch-

a couple days ago i had heartburn, because i don’t eat particularly well (binge eating and eating unhealthy food in general… i really try to not to do so but it’s hard :() and that made my mom pretty stressed and i felt horrible about it and im scared with the possibility that i could damage myself greatly.

i also generally act stubborn and, well, not the best- it causes her to be pretty snappy with me (which i understand, i just wish she isn’t so harsh) and when i was being very much random and like… i don’t fucking know, just me being a weirdo again- she said to me “something bad will happen in your life, mark my words” or something like that. im not sure if she actually meant that (bc we were already stuck in the rain at that time and had came back from a reoccurring meeting thing she doesn’t exactly enjoy… can’t really say here for privacy reasons-) but that freaked me out big time. like… sorry for just being who i am, silly and well, myself… like jeepers give me a warning before you drop something very much not good at all that makes me question myself deeply 😨

i really wish i could change how i act, even my identity, because i just wish that my mom accepted me. i wish i was a better person, i wish could meet her standards, i just wish that she supported me. but no, of course not. im sure she still loves me, even with me being a freaky goober, but she definitely doesn’t like how i am. i wish i can improve how i act for the better, but god damn that’s hard.

and with the fact that i have anxiety (i have a lot of symptoms, i can’t get professionally diagnosed, soo self diagnosed), anger issues, im super emotional andddd im stuck home with not much to do but be on devices n shit and just,, being alone with my thoughts a lot,,, i’ve just not been coping well, at all-

eugh… i wish school started earlier, so i’d be able to talk to my friends, as well as just being in a environment where im not??? alone with me myself and i??? this fucking sucks

i swear therapy would make me feel so much better, but im lowkey scared to talk about this to the counselors at my school about it, and i did ask my mom about getting therapy like a couple weeks back and she waved it off and said i didn’t need it… bitch you clearly know that im broken asf and you dont let me? :( ik it stresses her out but pleas….. do something that can help me feel better again aghhh

i also really hate that i have short term memory, and i can’t really understand some things correctly. it’s so damn annoying :C and with the fact that i was let on the internet at a pretty young age didn’t help either. like, fucking 2nd grade, is when i lost my innocence. god damn (then again, that’s when i moved to one of the other boroughs from queens, so. i got immediately exposed💀) and i was left unsupervised so much. im still on the internet a lot, and im not happy about that at all. but because of summer break, im stuck at home, andd i don’t have a lot to do besides basic chores, hw and reading. being on the internet is a escape from reality for me, but i really wish it wasn’t. im trying to do stuff other than being online but all the negative thoughts keep flooding back in my head… it’s literally so miserable even being online isn’t working to make those thoughts go away.

i feel dumb and useless. i feel like im a nuisance to everyone. i just wish i can belong, and i wish i was happy. im fucking scared of growing up, and im scared of what i’ll become. what the fuck will i even do when im an adult? i can’t fathom it at fucking all. im worried my life really will take a turn for the worst. (what if what my mom said is true…?)

i hate panicking. it’s starting to become more prominent :( and i’ve also been panicking with the thought of me being a therian, in which it’s like “oh no sam you might be a cambitherian or a therian and not animalhearted” to “no you can’t be either of those animalhearted resonates with you the most.” “righttttt…..?” and repeat. i don’t think i really identify as a cat at all but my brain is funky :< but like i do feel better with being cathearted. cats are my found family, but not my kin. if i had the ability to i’d def be a cat though. it would be a more stress free life 💔💔

now im using my ipad to take my mind off of the stress and rant abt this. welp… not helping that my ipad has a cracked screen and i have to get it fixed for the third time…. and that i have to deal with the hassle of moving soon… the only decent thing is me going to the beach on monday. maybe i’ll be a bit less active tomorrow. well i’ll try to- the summer reading homework isn’t doing itself…. sobbing

i feel like im typing gibberish now oopsies. its 11pm💀 sighhh I just hope things will get better soon, maybe when school starts again i’ll be able to cope better. (i feel like im repeating things a lot, but oh well)

[dabsforbreakfast]

Im gonna loose my girlfriend bc of my weight

we never go out and when we do all I complain abt is how I look or I complain abt my anxiety. all these girls around us look so pretty and feminine and I look like this. im constantly accusing her of lying and cheating. she's mostly understanding but ik she's tired of it especially after 6 years of it. I just feel like she's missing out on an actual girlfriend. I wear the same outfit everyday and can never dress up for her bc I don't feel comfortable in anything but sweats. she can't touch me or look at me I mean what kind of relationship is that. my body dysmorphia is so bad I don't even know what I look like. I just want this all to end bc I can't deal w it anymore. I want her to stay but she deserves better but im too selfish to break up with her bc I love her. ik she's tired of me. its not a I think anymore bc she is. im trying everything to look better for her but I have no will power when it comes to food. I just love her sm and im making her fall out of love everyday bc of the things I do.

sorry I just needed to vent 

[9tzuyu]

reality check

notes: quick vent fic while i work on other stuff sorry :c

warnings: heavily revolved around restrictive eating disorders, alludes to SA, but doesn’t go into detail, natasha not being very understanding (at first), starts in the middle of a fight bc i didn’t know how else to begin the story lol, semi-proofread.

mama!nat x daughter reader

no tags cause of the topic :c

masterlist

. . .

“you know, i would’ve been grateful to have so much food around me when i was younger.” natasha scoffed.

“i just wish you would understand, or at least try to!” you cried out, tears streaming steadily down your face. “it’s not about food, mom. i-i don’t even know what it’s about, but trust me when i say that if i could choose to live without this disorder i would.”

you felt pathetic as you wiped your tears off your face. you’d been arguing with your mother for a good thirty minutes now, something that almost never happened before your issue became known.

“why can’t you just eat the food? tell me, why can’t you? why, y/n? it’s food-”

“i know it’s food!”

“then eat it!” natasha screamed back at you. “i get it, you need to feel in control of something. but why can’t you just control something else-”

“i didn’t choose to have an eating disorder. and it’s not about control, not anymore. i told you, i don’t know what it’s about.” you sighed, heart breaking with each response you gave your mother.

natasha rolled her eyes. “your life has been so easy, i made sure of that. you never once had to deal with any of the shit i did, so why are you doing this to me? how do you think i feel?”

you could help but laugh at your mother.

“how do i think you feel? how do you think i feel, mom? you’re not the one living with this, i am.” you wiped your eyes once more, ignoring the sting that had been caused from the repeated action.

“you preach so publicly about mental health and how important it is. people adore you for it. so why won’t you listen to your own child?”

your mother shook her head, "you should be grateful."

"i am grateful! i'm so grateful for everything you've done for me, so much so that it kills me to know that i can't just stop this. i feel so guilty for it and when you say these... awful things to me it makes me feel so stupid and worse than i already do." you sobbed, pushing yourself further away from your mother until your back hit the headboard of your bed.

"i wish i could think of it as just food. i wish i could eat without feeling so guilty i have to force myself to throw up. i wish that i didn't feel like the only way i'm ever truly good is if i'm empty. i wish i could tell you what happened, but i feel like everything i say and do disappoints you."

natasha took another look at you, one that really stuck with her. she didn't recognize you anymore, you weren't the daughter she'd raised since the tender age of five. you weren't the daughter she knew just a couple of months ago. it truly wasn't until you passed out at school and ended up in the hospital with your diagnosis when everything changed. she didn't know you anymore and it tore her apart.

the more she studied you, the more she noticed how beat down and exhausted you appeared. everything about you was dull and worn out to the point she wasn't sure how much of you was left.

"i'm sorry," natasha finally let out. "i don't understand. i don't think i ever will understand." you went to interrupt her, but she was quicker than you.

"i don't think i can because i've never struggled with an eating disorder, but what i can do is try. you are my child and i love you endlessly. i don't want anything bad to ever happen to you and i'm sorry i wasn't able to protect you from this. i don't want to fight anymore because i don't want to lose you."

your breath caught in the back of your throat as you listened to your mother.

"i want you to be able to come to me when you're struggling. i want to help you get better." she finished off, taking a step towards you before sitting on the edge of your bed.

"but you still think those things, mom. i don't want your help when i know the only thing going through your mind is how selfish and ungrateful i am," you croaked.

"what i said was ignorant and i know i can't take it back, but i'm willing to do whatever it is that i need to get you better."

"well first you have to know it's not about food. i can't 'just eat it' like you want me to. i can't just choose not to have an eating disorder anymore." you snapped uncontrollably.

"okay," natasha nodded. "i believe you."

"i do want to get better, i think. i'm not sure. i know i have a problem but i don't want to accept that i have a problem..." you trailed quietly. "i don't know how to live without it anymore, i can't remember who i was before this."

natasha tilted her head in confusion, "i thought you'd just been struggling for a few months?"

"it's been years, mom. it's a very secretive disorder, i did everything in my power to make sure you didn't know about it. pretty easy to do when you're gone half the time anyway." you shrugged.

"i'm sorry," she admitted.

there was a beat of silence before the two of you spoke again.

"what happened?"

"what do you mean?"

"earlier, you said you wished you could tell me what happened." she pointed out.

"oh." your heart dropped and natasha could see you visibly pale at the thought of having to say what it was.

"is it bad?"

"depends on your definition of bad."

"did someone hurt you?"

"yeah. but it was a long time ago, it doesn't matter now. i'm over it." you lied pathetically.

"it does matter and you're not over it." your mother stated calmly, desperate to keep her voice from cracking.

"i was 14, it was years ago. i don't want to talk about it."

"i can respect that, but you'll have to eventually. doesn't have to be with me, but it'll only get worse the longer you don't deal with it." everything in her was fighting to not demand you tell her the name of who did it. she knew that wouldn't help you, not when you still haven't even processed it.

she felt like a failure of a mother, but this was not about her. it was about you.

"where do you want to go from here?"

"i don't know."

natasha chewed on her bottom lip. "i've missed you."

"do you miss me or who you thought i was?" you questioned, bringing your knees into your chest.

she pondered for a second, "both i guess."

it was a fair answer.

"keeping it a secret from you was the hardest thing i ever had to do."

"so why did you?"

"i wasn't sure how to tell you, let alone when to tell you... and then seeing how you've reacted up until now i'm glad i didn't."

natasha would never tell you how much your words pierced her heart, but it was her own doing. she didn't have much room, if any, to feel sorry for herself.

"what i will say though, is that i miss being curled up into your side with our favorite snacks and desserts while we watched horror movies. i miss spending our mornings arguing over pancakes or waffles, not over if i would eat that day."

the redhead chuckled. "you know for someone who doesn't eat very much you sure have the energy to hold a fight."

"fear will do that to you."

"do you think you'll ever be yourself again?"

you hummed, “i think i’ll be a new version of my old self.”

“i like that answer. i think a lot of people feel like they will never be themselves again after traumatic events. i know i never felt like i could.” natasha spoke, her eyes meeting yours.

for the first time in awhile you didn’t feel like you were disappointing her.

“i used to think like that, but i don’t anymore because you don’t have to lose yourself completely. you don’t have to start over by completely erasing who you once were. i’d like to believe that i can still cherish those parts of me before they were tainted.”

natasha smiled for the first time that day. “you’re completely right.”

“before you get too happy i want you to remember that just because we’re having a good moment now doesn’t mean we won’t have more days like earlier.” you reminded her.

it hurt to see her face fall, but you were right.

your mother needed to remember that this wouldn’t be going away quickly or any time soon. but if she keeps her word and tries to do better than before, you knew there was a better chance at healing.

[hopper-wheeler]

every season el goes on a journey of self discovery away from mike and learns new important things about herself and the world and then she comes back to mike and they still love each other so much and every season people say “el needs to be her own person and go on a journey of self discovery away from mike to learn new important things about herself and the world!!!!!” like y’all it’s been four seasons of her doing exactly that. and mike and el just always love each other even more afterwards and have an even deeper connection each time. when will these people realize it’s okay to just not like a ship you don’t have to make up faux-feminist reasons to act like it’s morally wrong or whatever. you can just. dislike it lol

“I hate mileven bc I care about el! all she cares about is mike!! she’s solely dependent on him!!!” woah wild how they missed so many of el’s plot lines and character arcs while they were so busy “caring” about her

(sorry for dumping this in your inbox lol I just wanted to get it out there to someone who probably gets it, I hope you have a good day!)

don't be sorry, it's totally okay to vent here! and i do get your frustration all too well.

one of the things that bugs me the most about the hate mileven gets, aside from it being wholy underserved imo, is the way people keep trying to find reasons why it's problematic or badly written to justify their dislike. it's okay to just not vibe with a character/relationship. that's fine. it's actually a lot more respectable than whatever this is.

but people would really rather be annoying and waste their time on something they don't even like just to try and come out on top. as if instead of not shipping a couple of 15-year-olds they're actually standing up for women everywhere or something.

which is really funny when the woke takes these people tend to come up with are actually some of the most misogynistic, ableist takes i've ever seen.

"el needs to be her own person."

so women can't be in a relationship and be in love with someone and still be their own person.

"she's too dependent on mike, she needs him too much."

so women wanting support from the people they love makes them dependent and therefore weak.

"el doesn't even have any real world experience. she can't even talk properly and doesn't even know what clothes she likes. she shouldn't be in a romantic relationship. and it's weird that mike likes her. seems predatory idk."

so anyone who's been through terrible abuse and struggles because of that, has a difficulty with speech and understanding social cues, and/or is still developing a sense of identity shouldn't be allowed to make their own decisions or be in a loving relationship. and it's weird for someone else to take a romantic interest in them unless they're taking advantage in some way because no way would anyone just... love them for who they are.

great. that's actually very gross of you.

and don't even get me started on the canon erasure. it's like 90% of people didn't even watch this show. i'm tired of people claiming mileven needs to be given breathing room when they're the only couple to have been separated in some way every season. you can say whatever you want about st, but one thing the show has done since day 1 is give el, the character, plenty of agency. el is not stuck in hawkins. she's not stuck with mike. she chose that. she chose her family and we saw her do that, every step of the way.

so yeah anyone who says "i love el but mileven..." is full of shit. if you actually loved el you'd respect her choices and want her to have the people she loves by her side, supporting her.

[ceiling-painted-white]

Hiya, love your writing! You may be seeing me a lot💖

Could i request sal x a reader who just found out her pain meds were elevating her mental issues and its been making her self harm bc of ✨psycosis✨ but she’s scared to tell him because psycosis has such a bad rep in the media. She isn’t allowed near blades anymore (probably for the best lol) but whenever she’s angry or scared she punches herself in the face. She’s getting counselling tho, so thats a good step lol!

Sorry if its too much detail or I’m oversharing, and please don’t feel like you have too, I completely understand if you feel uncomfortable 💖

heyy glad to see u in my askbox again!

disclaimer: im sorry if some of the stuff written is inaccurate, and please DM me if there's something i should change or fix. im always open to criticism and feedback, especially regarding things like this!

content warning: strong mention of self harm, therapy, self destructive behaviors, pain meds, mental illnesses, and depression. please PLEASE read with caution

sal with a s/o who deals with psychosis and self harm - gn!reader

✧he's such a good listener

✧you can vent and rant to him about literally anything

✧and he'll listen and offer the best advice he's got

✧he supports you all the way and offers as much help as he can

✧anything that you need he'll do his best to offer

✧if you ever have the urge to self harm/relapse

✧or you're just feeling bad

✧he's the best a comforting

✧he'll hold you and run his fingers thru your hair

✧telling you all about the things he loves about you (spoiler alert, its literally everything)

✧he'd wanna watch a movie or play on his gearboy with you to distract you, too

✧he encourages you to stay away from medication that makes things worse, and tries his best to help you find alternatives

✧he always tells you how proud he is of you for working on yourself and trying to get better

✧and he's there 100% of the way :)