Tumgik
#sorrows and prayers for me really
janwixler · 1 year
Text
Totally unimportant fact, I love how Neil And I started our University 10 years apart. Everything feels so scary and overwhelming at the same time. Neil experienced that 10 years ago. it's a small fictional fact but it feels so comforting. The Dorm life, urge to run away but can't, minus the mafia and sports something feels like a deja vu. fine, it's okay, really, I just have one question as a freshman/international student...
Neil josten, HOW THE HELL DID YOU SURVIVE UNIVERSITY MID TERMS????!!
8 notes · View notes
sheepwithshoes · 1 year
Text
Sometimes I still miss you
Sometimes I still miss you
But not the way you think
I don't miss you like a little kid waiting for his dad to come home
I miss you like the moon misses the Sun
I miss you because I know that the only time will cross paths again is during an eclipse
And even then we won't speak just a short nod of the head and that's it
I know I'm better off without being burnt
And I know you're better off without being shadowed in
Sometimes just like the moon misses the sun I miss your warmth
My memories of you are almost like fever dreams
Because I know I'll never have them again
And I know we weren't good for each other in the end
But God I just wish we could have been
So yes sometimes I still miss you and by sometimes I mean everyday
But everyday missing you becomes easier
And sometimes the only thing I want is to be held in your arms again
And sometimes the only thing I want is to be able to call you and tell you how my day has been
But you don't want to hear it
And in the end I don't blame you
In the end I know that the Moon if it's out long enough will hurt everything
And I wouldn't want to hamper your brightness
I wouldn't want to be the reason that you were no longer you
But God it hurts to grieve a person that's still alive
Maybe it's the religious guilt
Like a kid who grew up Catholic I wish and pray to God every night that you'll come back
I started wearing rosaries just for good luck
But every night the results still the same
You won't come back and I know that.
But sometimes I still miss you
7 notes · View notes
neo-nomatrix · 3 months
Text
CAN’T TOUCH ME LIKE GOJO
what gojo does when he’s jealous
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
cw - gojo uses red as a punishment, smut, jealousy, possessiveness, riding, teasing, kinda toxic gojo idk, bratty reader, rough gojo
Tumblr media
Gojo was making you mad, beyond livid. He had brought you to this stuffy gala full of his balding colleagues and ditched you! You found solace in the bar holding an aperol spritz staring at your husband. He was beautifully dressed cream suit with a million dollar smile as he talks to his coworkers about business.
He hasn’t even thrown you a glance since he left your side. Normally you would still be next to him acting as arm candy but for whatever reason he left you to drink your sorrows. You assumed you would be stuck there for another hour or two with nothing to do. Until Hiromi Higuruma approached you. A man you had no idea was even distantly related to Gojos company.
“Mrs.Gojo, a pleasure seeing you somewhere besides with Satoru,” The man teases.
“Hiromi! Are you here to save me from this awful night?” It seems the lord has answered your prayers.
“You’re not enjoying yourself? Doesn’t Gojo normally keep by him at all times?” He asks, taking a seat next to you.
“Something’s up with him I guess, I’ve barely seen him all night and it’s horrible!” You complain.
“Oh sweetheart, how could he possibly treat someone as pretty as you like that?” He moves a piece of your hair out of your face and stares at you.
“I know! I mean he invited me here, and then has the audacity to leave me,” You pout to him.
“For the record, I would never treat you like that,” he smiles at you.
You look over at Gojo and he still isn’t looking in your direction. You decide to tease both the men a little more.
“Really? Do you promise ‘Romi?” You give him your best doe eyes and touch his bicep.
“On my life, sweetheart,” You both smile at each other.
In the corner of your eye you see a head of white hair coming toward you. Panic sets in but you can’t help but rub your legs together. You continue putting your hands on Higurumas chest to further instigate the situation.
“Babe, there you are! I’ve been looking all over for you,” Gojo pulls the back of your stool so you can’t touch Higuruma anymore and he wraps a large hand around your waist, “Higuruma, you’re also here.”
“I was just talking to your gorgeous wife Gojo. After you left her alone to talk to those gross executives,” Higuruma says.
Gojos jaw clenched and he squeezed your waist. His look of disgust apparent on his face.
“I think it’s about time my wife and I leave. Should I call you a cab Higuruma?” Gojo says.
“I’ll be alright,” Higuruma laughs.
Gojo pulls you away from the bar and quickly takes you away from the party. He ignores everyone asking where he’s going or trying to talk to him. Immediately as he reaches the car he opens and slams the door for you. He doesn’t speak a single word on the way home, despite your efforts to start conversation.
As you reach your home he’s immediately getting you through the door and up the stairs, he shoves you onto the bed as he removes his jacket. You hear him muttering swears under his breath.
“Do you enjoy being a slut who pisses me off? Hm? I mean really, what possibly do you get out of this?” He starts to undo the first few buttons of his shirt before he grabs your chin.
“I asked you a fucking question,” He growls at you.
“You left me! You left me all alone! I don’t know what you wanted from me, to just sit there twiddling my thumbs until you came back?” You argue at him, giving a big pout.
“What I don’t want is for you flirting with that piece of shit in front of everyone? You know how embarrassing that is, not only for me, but for you?!” He slips off his boxers to reveal his semi hard cock.
He pulls you up and puts you on your knees. He’s on his back and your face is inches away from his cock. But before you can wrap your lips around him something stops you. A force you can’t describe, red. He activated his repelling force to punish you.
You’re confused, upset, even angry at him. His usual punishment involves him overstimulating you but apparently not this time. You try to get past the barrier, using all your might to touch his cock. Yet nothing works, he’s the strongest after all.
“What did he call you?” He asks you, releasing red for you until you almost touch him, then activating it again.
“Sweetheart…” you whisper to him.
“And you fucking let him. That’s the part that pisses me off the most. I know he can’t have you, fuck, he knows it. But it doesn’t seem like you do,” He says back, piercing blue eyes scanning your face.
You crawl on top of him, the barrier between your pussy and his cock still apparent. You try desperately to grind down on him to no avail. Tears start to form in your eyes but Gojo doesn’t seem to care.
“You want it inside you, sweetheart? Or do you want ‘Romi?” He mocks you.
“YOU! I just wanted your attention, promise! I got so mad you left me by myself. See?! All i want is you,” You whine as Gojo smiles at you.
In a moment the red hue turns blue and you get sucked down onto his perfectly aligned cock. You’re stuck to him like a magnet. His size makes you scream and want to pull away, but you can’t. As soon as you pull away you’re sucked back onto him, you thought torture wasn’t supposed to be addicting.
“Fuck Higuruma, fuck him and all the stupid guys there. You thought i wasn’t paying attention to you? I wanted you so fucking bad I had to stay away or else you’d be on the floor with my cock inside you,” He grunts, hands gripping your waist.
“Toru! It’s too much!” You’re full on sobbing at this point, legs shaking and body sweaty.
“You don’t want him right? It was just to make me mad, right baby?” He asks you desperately, his hair falling perfectly in front of his eyes.
“Yes! I just wanted you to fuck me, I swear,” You squeal.
His hips rut into your sloppy cunt as both of you moan and pant like two bunnies in heat. His fingers expertly tease your clit and he sucks blue and red hickies on every part of your body. He’s holding you as close as possible. His thrusts get sloppy and his moans get slutty.
“Gonna cum inside you baby, gonna fill my pussy up everyone’s gonna fucking know you’re mine,” He says in your ear.
“I’m gonna-“ Before you can even finish your sentence you pulse around his cock cumming so hard you see black.
He follow not long after, spurting hot ropes of cum inside you. He gets as deep as possible to ensure nothing slips out. He releases the technique and you fall on top of his chest, breathing like you just ran a marathon.
“Holy shit baby, that was so good,” He says, smiling.
“Yeah… i wanna take a bath,” you look up at him.
“Okay my love, just promise me one thing. Never make me jealous again.”
7K notes · View notes
byuntrash101 · 8 months
Text
the better friend
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
f!reader x san x mingi ft ateez smut | mdni 7.3k a good friend lets a friend watch but a better friend lets him join nsfw tags under the cut
idol!au, dom bf!san, switch simp!mingi (rengoku hair mingi because im weak for him), a teeny tiny bit of plot, san is an evil genius in this, biting, marking, exhibitionism/voyeurism (mingi peeping at reader and san), sensory deprivation (blindfold), suspicion of dubcon but it's cleared out, masturbation (m), oral (m), fingering (f), threesome with sangi, unprotected sex (don't do that kids), praises and degradation (good girl, darling, princess... but also slut, whore, etc), lots of begging, so. much. teasing, kitty slaps <33333 (san is the kitty slapper™), finger sucking (f & m), ruined orgasm (f), dumbification (reader and mingi are fucked stupid), sloppy seconds, cum play (lots of cum), multiple orgasms (f & m), overstimulation (m), facial (f), a bit of spit kink, squirting, lowkey wholesome ending (we love to see it)
this a sequel to the good friend but it can be read as a stand alone. you just have to know san and reader have been dating for a long time and mingi has been simping for reader for almost as long.
a/n: i really went all in tbh. i dont know what happened but like. this fic is filthy and I LOVE IT. also consider this our collective manifestation prayer circle to achieve barricade tickets for the upcoming tour <3
ateez masterlist | navigation
Tumblr media
Usually you wouldn’t watch the concert from the crowd. San said it would be too distracting to see you in the pit of faces along with the cheering crowd of entranced fans. Moreover, he could perform any song for you whenever you wanted, you simply had to ask. But you always argued it wasn’t the same looking from backstage because the angle was all wrong and the sound wasn’t as clear. And for the private concerts, they didn’t have the sparkly outfits and San didn’t have the same drive, the same aura he had on stage.
“Even with the best will in the world I can't cheer as loud and stroke your ego as good as a crowd of tens of thousands of Atinys chanting your name in unisson.” 
San only sighed. All those points were indeed valid. And he had to admit defeat.
“Just this once, ok?” and you practically jumped in his arms and kissed him all over his pretty face which traded the deep creases between his straight brows and the pout for an amused smile on his lips. “But you gotta promise me to blend in” he said sternly, momentarily getting out of the array of kisses to make sure he got his point across. You nodded firmly.
“Don’t worry too much about it Sannie~”  you said before hugging him again. 
“Yeah…” he said and you felt his cheek lifting against yours once more. An idea blossomed within him.
***
The concert was insane. You were so glad you had finally convinced your performer boyfriend. Being there in the crowd felt so much different from backstage. There you could cheer and enjoy the show in a way that was so much more intense and raw. You screamed and chanted and sang. You did everything. Yeosang even waved at you and you waved back. But it all felt and looked like a normal fan to idol interaction. So you were doing a pretty good job at keeping your promise to your boyfriend.
Speaking of the devil, that man captivated you. His aura on stage was unparalleled. His moves were sharp, his eyes focussed, his voice powerful and stable. He was incredibly professional. 
He perfectly conveyed every emotion of each act so perfectly. His delivery carried out sorrow and depth throughout the emotional songs and his moves inspired power and aplomb during the upbeat and energetic ones.
The fact that he still manages to surprise you every time with his talent and drive is incredible in itself. You were there every step of the way of his journey. You met a kid with a dream and now you stood in front of a man with passion. 
And what a man he was. You couldn’t get enough of him, enough of the way he moved so effortlessly on stage, enough of the way his presence filled the venue entirely. You couldn't take your eyes off him. The way the tight black sleeveless top hugged his frame, how his broad shoulders moved and accompanied every beat, how the sweat rolled off his temples and neck to get soaked by the black fabric, how his prominent muscles flexed and relaxed, the way the light bounced off his glossy bronzed skin. 
He was born to be on this stage of that you were convinced without the shadow of a doubt. 
But curiously when you weren’t eyeing your boyfriend like candy you found your eyes weirdly gravitating toward another member… Mingi. Well, no it wasn’t that weird, after all Mingi was your friend, a very good friend. Yeah it was only normal that you wanted to witness him in his element too. 
A friend cheering for a friend. 
Everything was perfectly normal. Everything? Even the thrill you felt when he delivered powerful and incisive rap verses with that low voice that was his signature? Even the tingle you felt in your guts when you saw him perfectly execute the body waves? Even the heat rushing to your chest and face when you saw the way his flexible hips rolled and thrusted? Even the unquenchable thirst you felt when you noticed the way his lips rounded up around the water bottle as he threw his head back and swallowed in big gulps, droplets of sweat running down the column of his throat and dripping at the soaked ends of the bright orange and red hair? Yes! Normal! Everything. Just normal…
But what was it, that you felt your eyes locked with his and you noticed he was also watching you. A fleeting second that seemed to last for a lifetime, hung in between the tensed and humid air. A second that silenced the crowd around you. And as quick as your eyes met his, the contact was broken. 
San once again smirked.
And the show went on.
***
When the show ended you waited a little for the venue to empty. Some people were still hanging around chatting excitedly about the fresh core memories they had made or taking selfies to ensure the memories stayed vivid for a long time. But you managed to sneak behind the barricades unnoticed. 
You found the members exchanging and laughing at some minor unnoticed mistakes that happened that you didn’t even catch.
“Y/n-ah!!” Wooyoung was the first one to notice you. And he wrapped his arms around your nape lovingly. “How was the show? Did you like it? Who was the most handsome back there? Was it me? Don’t say San or I will get mad! It was me, wasn’t it?”
You only laughed returning his warm embrace.
“You’re lucky Mingi isn’t here when you get this handsy with y/n” Yunho remarked, crossing his arms on his chest. You and Yeosang were the only ones that appeared remotely confused by the statement. 
“You mean San?” Yeosang asked, in an attempt to clear out the confusion but Yunho only shook his head.
“San doesn’t mind it as much.” Yunho added.
“Mingi is the one that only tolerates San being all touchy touchy with y/n” Seonghwa said, as he was removing his mic pack from his back pocket. 
You were still very much perplexed but when you went back to look at Yeosang he was just nodding knowingly in approbation. You decided to not pay more attention to the strange exchange because you only wanted to congratulate San.
“Speaking of my wonderful boyfriend. Any idea where he’s hiding?” 
Hongjoong shrugged as he looked around. 
“San and Mingi already went back to the dressing rooms, I think” Jongho said. 
“Thanks big baby” you said, ruffling his hair and fleeing instantly while you heard him complain about it in the distance. 
Once you reached the hall of individual dressing rooms you rushed to San’s door ready to barge in before you heard a muffled conversation coming from the other side. You couldn’t make much of what was being said but you recognized the voices without a doubt. You decided to knock before letting yourself in carefully.
“Oh! y/n, baby” San rushed to you as soon as you entered while Mingi stood there and gave you a silent nod and an awkward half smile (the signature business smile as Yunho liked to call it). You returned the smile, perfectly mirroring Mingi’s awkwardness. “So how was the show?” San continued paying no mind to Mingi anymore, solely focussing on you.
“I’m gonna get going” Mingi said, somewhat hurriedly before walking past you and heading towards the door. Before closing it he exchanged a knowing glance with San who returned it with a nod, you tried to decipher the unreadable expression on your boyfriend’s face but to no avail. And your tall fire haired friend disappeared promptly behind the door. Something felt strange about the whole ordeal but you couldn't pinpoint it. 
But after the tension you felt looking at Mingi during the concert you didn’t have it in you to bring it up, to bring him up. You wanted to focus on your boyfriend. That was the best thing to do… for everyone.
“So~ baby ~. Did you enjoy yourself?” San asked and he snaked his strong arm around your waist, his skin still had a light sheen of sweat about it.
“You were incredible!!” you said enthusiastically, trying your best to get rid of the outlandish feeling and the lingering guilt.
“Was I, huh? Really?” he said, curious to hear more. You knew how much San liked to be praised so you went on.
“You’re the performer of the century! Your voice was so good like baby your mic was ON!” San nestled his face in the crook of your neck.
“Go on” he said as he was planting soft kisses on your skin. His hands were now roaming your body sliding up your arms and down your spine to the small of your back and up again. He was really enjoying the praises, so much so that the atmosphere shifted again to feel a little heavier, a subtle change that you picked up on right away. After dating San for so long you knew him all too well to not know what the soft touches and gentle kisses on your neck meant. So you matched his energy. What better way to chase away Mingi’s memory than to let your boyfriend fuck you stupid until you could only remember his name and the way his cock felt inside you?
“Yes. You looked so focussed and you looked so good.'' Another kiss and another, slower, lingering, warm. “I couldn't take my eyes off you” you felt him smirk against your skin. That was a lie. He knew that but somehow that lighted a fire in him. And he threw a look to the ajar door of the dressing room.
“Fuck you smell so good baby” San huffed pushing his hardening cock onto your hip and you bit your lip to repress a moan. “It was so hard not to look at you while you were down in the pit” He breathed against your skin. “I wanted to make you step on that stage and take you right there.” He pushed his cock with more intent onto you. “I wanted everyone to see you. I wanted everyone to know what a good little slut you can be for me” This time the kiss had more teeth, you felt him bite onto your neck. “Can you imagine? All those eyes on you?” 
This mere vision had you moaning and throwing your head back. In a flash your brain played it like a movie for you: you, sprawled out onto the stage, being a good girl for your boyfriend. Your face flushed and your folds glistening with need. While he pushed into you under the roars of the crowd. Under their gaze. Under his gaze. Mingi looking at you being fucked full of cock and cum. Mingi looking at you… The thought sent a wave of arousal through your guts and you felt your panties becoming uncomfortably wet.
“Fuck” San complained in a short breath, his rumbling voice bringing you back. “I want you so fucking bad” the urgency that laced his low voice made the carnal confession that much more real. The sexual tension was almost palpable.
“Then what are you waiting for?” you said teasingly, pressing your thigh up his groin and you felt him melt into the skin of your neck with a small gasp. You smirked, satisfied.
“Fuck baby you’re so so bad” he teased and extended his hand to the clothing rack of gaudy and studded stage outfits that was next to you. “I want us to play today” his fingers interlaced with a silk scarf that you believed belonged to one of Yunho’s fits from a previous stage. “What about a little sensory deprivation play? What do you say baby?” He asked, holding the makeshift blindfold. 
You thought of it for a second. Any other time you would have jumped on the occasion but now… your goal was precisely to look at San to forget… well everything else. There’s really no telling what your imagination will run to if your eyes aren’t able to only take in the figure of your boyfriend. And that scared you a little bit. San sensed it right away.
“You know you can trust me right?” you knew that much of course you could trust him. But could you trust yourself?  
“I know what you like, baby don’t worry. Let’s try something new, okay?”
“Okay” you finally exhaled.
***
Mingi didn’t know what he was still doing there. Hunched over and peeping through the small gap of the door like a creep. He should go, he should have gone a long time ago. That was just a crazy idea. What kind of friend just agrees when he’s asked to watch his friend and his girlfriend (who also happened to be his crush) fuck? He should have declined and left but no. He said yes. And he didn’t even think twice, didn't even question it. He just blurted yes like a pathetic simp that’s been waiting for the occasion forever. (That was true unfortunately but Mingi wasn’t ready to admit that to himself). Now San probably thought he was a weird fucking pervert. A fucking freak. But he wasn't…right? Right! Yeah, of course he wasn’t! So he should leave… He should leave like now. But he couldn't.
He couldn’t when he saw your face change as San buried his face into your neck. He loved the way your eyes changed when he saw San roll his hips against yours. The whole aura about you changed, your gaze darkened but also your voice. It became lower, more sultry. He couldn’t make out what you two were saying but he didn’t have to because the non verbal language was more than enough to understand the simple primal interaction that was happening between you two. 
You were about to fuck…
When San grabbed Yunho’s silk scarf and held it to you. Mingi felt your hesitation but then an instant later San was carefully tying the silk ribbon at the back of your head. Not too tight just enough to keep you from seeing anything. And just like that in a second it was dark.
Mingi watched his friend guiding you to the vanity and you giggled playfully as his large hands snaked to your thighs and grabbed your ass to hoist you up the furniture, pushing the makeup products in the process, one lipstick rolling off the surface and on the ground. Neither of you both even realized and Mingi couldn’t care less especially now that San’s hand left your hip to turn around and signal Mingi to enter back into the room. 
His heart sunk into the pit of his stomach. Was he really about to do that? Yeah of course he was. Because his body was moving on its own, feeling the irrepressible pull, the inexplicable magnetism he felt for you from that very first day in Gang-nam. 
San’s hand moved to his lips to signal his tall friend not to make any noise. And as if he was floating Mingi found himself holding his breath and standing to your side ogling you hungrily as San focussed back on you. His hand leaving his lips to ride your skirt up your hips and revealing the black lace panties.
“Did you know we were going to do that?” your boyfriend asked and you didn’t need to see to know about the shit eating grin on his face. “Is it why you wore such easy-access clothes?”
You gasped and bit your lip. You couldn't see but you could feel. San’s warm hands on your thigh rose goosebumps on your skin. The heightened sensations made more arousal pool in your panties.
“Answer me, baby” San said, low voice taking on a commanding tone before suddenly pulling on your blouse, popping open every single one of your snap buttons and just like that your black lace bra was also on display.
And Mingi thought he was going to explode. He couldn’t take his eyes off you, he had to clench his fist so hard and only the dull pain in his palms kept him from gasping at the breathtaking view. How fucking beautiful could you be? 
San grabbed a fist full of your breasts kneading them roughly through your undergarment to urge an answer out of you 
“Yes!” you hurriedly replied. Arching your back into his touch. “I wore this skirt and blouse because I know how much you like to rip them off” 
“Good girl”
You heard your boyfriend hum in satisfaction and what you didn't hear was Mingi biting down on his lip so hard he could have drawn blood. But he couldn’t do otherwise when San’s fingers hooked themselves on the waist band of the lace and dragged the article of clothing along your thighs until it hung loosely on one of your ankles.
“Show me everything” San said in a breath, harshly tugging on your bra as your breasts jumped out and spilled to each side of your chest.
Mingi repressed a strangled gasp in the back of his throat as his dripping cock strained against the tight concert attire. 
“I said everything baby” San said and you knew exactly what he meant. Slowly you spread your legs to let the vanity light shine right onto your heat as everything remained dark on your part. 
Mingi felt like his brain was going to give out as your body was revealed. Your perfect breasts and hardened nipples and of course your dripping core. Long strings of slick linked your hole to the skin of your inner thighs. Mingi felt dizzy at the sight.
“Good girl” San praised again. “You always get wet so easily don't you?” he chuckled while you fought the urge to touch yourself. “Good little slut” he praised again, his hands dipping between your thighs and aiming right away for your clit. 
You pushed your hips onto his touch and moaned as he circled your bundle of nerves exactly how you liked it. 
“Fuck Sannie” you whined. “More please” 
“Want your cute little cunt finger fucked?” San cooed with his honey toned voice. And you nodded enthusiastically. But that only earned you a sharp slap on your exposed center. The wet clap resounded in the empty room. It seemed amplified for you. You moaned loudly at the stinging feeling, the delicious and unexpected pain made your legs tense up and shake slightly.
“You’re wearing a blindfold, not a gagball, princess. Use your words” San said sternly landing another slap on your swollen clit before gently circling it again.
“Y-yess!! Yes!!! P-please. Want your fingers inside” you replied in a strangle moaned, your hips uncontrollably following San’s every move.
Mingi’s jaw dropped to the floor he never knew you’d enjoyed such things, he never knew you’d enjoy the harsh tone of voice and the pain but there was no doubt you were actually loving every single second of this. Mingi was certain of it when he saw the way your cunt reacted to each little slap, the way you quivered, the way you rolled your hips into San’s hand, the pleasured moans that cascaded from your lips. Mingi couldn't take it anymore and without even realizing it he found himself palming his hard and leaking cock through his pants. 
“Good girl” San praised right before pushing two fingers inside your tight heat, curling them right into your sweet spot. You felt your concerns melt right away as you felt the two digits permeate you. The familiar feeling of the ring on his index made your mind go blank at the pleasure you felt radiating from your very core.
“F-fuck.. Sa-annie…” you breathed out with difficulty.
“Shhh. That’s it baby. I got you” San cooed, laying his other hand on your thigh, stroking it lightly. “You’re so good baby. You take my fingers so well”
The praises were setting your mind and body on fire, and you were giving in to the brazier. You moaned louder as San was pumping in and out of your cunt more rapidly, dragging out the wet squelching sounds that bounced off the walls and came back to your ears.
And Mingi’s too. He was completely entranced by the way your cunt was sucking in San’s fingers. You were so eager for them, your pussy clenching and throbbing around them every time he pulled out and welcoming them back when he pushed back in creating more thick and clear slick to gush out of your hungry little hole, the pull of arousal soon forming a small puddle in San’s palm. Mingi couldn’t think anymore, he could only rub his painfully hard cock as the wet precum stain became visible through his pants. 
“Baby are you going to cum?” San asked, his other hand leaving your thigh to lay flat on your stomach and drawing quick circles on your clit with his thumb.
“Yesss” you said through gritted teeth. But as you felt the familiar build up almost reach the peak it went away. San withdrew his fingers and took them out of your poor confused little cunt. Leaving you there to clench around nothing and whines slipped from your lips at the sudden loss of the fullness.
“You’re so greedy today” San said before slapping your eager little cunt again. You moaned and shook under him, fighting the urge to close your legs. “I’m not done playing with you”
San started to rub your clit again with his thumb with one hand while he lifted the other slick coated one to his tall friend. He wanted to chuckle but fought against it when Mingi looked back at him with puzzled puppy eyes. So he approached his hand closer to his face and mouthed “taste her”.
Mingi’s brain had given up a long time ago, so he was moving only on instincts when he opened his mouth and licked around his friend's digits as silently as possible. That was a dream come true never in a lifetime he would have hoped to taste you like this. Ever. You tasted so sweet and sinful, the velvety nectar slided on his tongue so smoothly and his eyes rolled back as he solely focused on your taste on his tongue and your alluring scent floating to his nose. 
Fuck that was what San had the pleasure of tasting everytime he found himself between your legs. If only he could taste more. Without even thinking Mingi wrapped both his hands around his friend’s wrist pushing his hand further into his mouth and sucked avidly on the cum coated finger and back to the pool of arousal that had gathered in his palm.
“Yeah that’s it” San praised as he circled your clit slowly, offering some kind of relief to the painfully swollen nub. But the praise was more for Mingi than for you. He smirked as he saw his friend devour your essence as if he was a parched man and the smirk only grew wider when he took back his hand and Mingi opened his eyes back looking at him with a glazed over stare. At that moment San knew his friend was done for.
“Here Princess” San said, extending to you his hand that was now coated in your own slick and Mingi’s spit. You instinctively welcomed the wet fingers into your mouth wrapping your lips around them and sucking them avidly. “How does it taste?”
“Sho- hmph… goodjf” you struggled to reply not wanting to let go of your boyfriend’s fingers.
Mingi was absolutely mesmerized by the way you were so eagerly sucking San’s fingers. Mixing your cum, your spit but also his own. His cock throbbed at the thought of cutting the middleman that was San’s hand and just lean down to kiss you. Lapping at your lips for entrance and diving into you, body and soul. He wanted it all.
“Such a good girl for me” San praised taking his fingers back, not without a quiet whine from your end and a repressed moan from Mingi. 
But the disappointment was short lived when you heard your boyfriend fidgeting with his pants and you knew what was coming up next. You prompted yourself on your elbow and spread your legs wider. San chuckled while Mingi cursed silently.
You were dying to see what San was doing. You wanted to see how he kicked off the pants and took his raging hard cock in hand to pump his fist a couple of times around it. You wanted to see him between your thighs as he rubbed his tip on your wets folds. You arched your back into him again, urging him to fill you up full of his cock.
“Fuck you’re so impatient, baby” He growled as he pushed his tip inside you earning a cry from you. “Is that what you wanted?" he huffed, his eyebrows meeting on his forehead as he felt the vice grip of your pussy around him. Even after a thousand times you still felt so good. So wet and tight for him.
“Y-yess! Oh fuck i- yes thank you Sannieee” you were barely able to say as you felt your cunt stretch around San’s girth. You lifted your face as if you could see him splitting you in two. You’d always liked to see him fill you up but sadly you couldn’t.
But Mingi, on the other hand, could see it all.
Mingi couldn’t help it anymore he pulled his pants and boxers down midthigh just enough to take his hard and leaking cock out. He didn’t take the time to undress. He didn’t have the time he needed to stroke his cock at the exact same pace as San was fucking you. 
Said pace was slow and deep. San liked to start out like that, he liked to drive you mad. You felt every inch of him leisurely pushing his thick cock inside until it touched the deepest part of you only to pull out just as slowly, enjoying the way your cunt gripped around him desperate to ever let him go. You were whimpering, whining and squirming. You were going crazy and you weren't the only one.
Mingi was struggling just as much as you were, his balled fist tightly wrapped around his aching length languidly going up and down. He was struggling to keep the hellishly slow pace, struggling to not stroke his fat cock faster but he had to if he wanted to maintain the illusion that it was him inside of you.
At some point San felt merciful and started to go faster. Not for you really he enjoyed to torture you way too much but it was more for Mingi, he noticed his tall friend pinching his lips into a thin line, sharp eyes shutting close and eyebrow digging a deep crease on his forehead. San enjoyed the anguish but he also enjoyed seeing the relief spread on his friends face when he finally fucked you harder. Your cunt became even tighter around San and he found himself moaning rhythmically along with you every time he pushed his thick cock inside you. While Mingi’s eyes didn't once leave your throbbing pretty pussy gushing out more and more translucent slick.
San gradually picked the pace to the point he was soon smashing his hips into you. Making your breasts jump with each powerful thrust. The fact that you couldn’t see your boyfriend makes you feel him that much more. You felt his strong and calloused hands on your thigh and waist and you felt his cock perfectly splitting you in two to this hellish rhythm that made you forget about anything else. Including your surroundings. You were no longer able to keep your voice down. Everything felt too strong, too good to be able to mask the loud moans of pleasure into small, controlled little whimpers. 
“F-fuck you’re really enjoying your…self” San struggled to say. “Aren’t you?”
You couldn’t even bring yourself to answer anything back. You could only let your tongue loll out of your mouth while you moaned incoherent words.
Mingi’s eyes kept on darting between your swollen cunt and your fucked out face. He just knew that underneath the silk blindfold you were rolling your eyes. And that made his cock twitch in his hold, more precum oozing out the tip, at this point it was practically dripping onto the tiled floor.
“Fuck why are you being so fucking loud for?” San asked with a scoff. “Want people to hear you?”
“Sa-nnie” you complained but you did not become quieter for that much.
“Ohh. I get it” San said in a sarcastic tone, slowing down again. That had you squirming when you felt the tight feeling in your core slowly fading away.
“N-no, p-please Sannie, nooo” you begged shaking your hips, trying to fuck yourself back on your boyfriend’s cock to find the same rhythm.
“You want people to know what kind of good whore you are”
“Yes, yesss. Exactly-fu-... Sannie please.” You would have agreed to anything he was saying to have him fuck you exactly like he was a second ago.
“Maybe you even want my members to hear you” San said with a smirk. “Especially Mingi I bet”.
At the mention of the name you stopped moving around, your brain flooding with the images of Mingi body rolling and dancing.
“Oh you just became tighter baby.” San said with a smirk. “So you do want him to see you” San said, fucking you even slower now. 
“Pleaseeee” you said in a breath.
“I bet you wished it was him fucking you right now” San said eventually completely pulling out of you.
“Noo… P-please” you whined quietly your throbbing cunt clenching around nothing, begging for more attention.
For the first time Mingi peeled his eyes off you to look at his friend only to be met with San’s wicked smirk. San’s smirk grew wider when he saw his fiery haired friend look back at him with big round terrified eyes. He knew Mingi was panicking right now; he couldn’t even touch his cock anymore. Poor weeping thing just waited there ignored while it continued leaking more precum.
“Say it, Princess” San insisted. “Be honest with me. Be honest with yourself” San cooed, leaning over you to whisper in your ear before leaving his place between your legs and gesturing to Mingi to take his place. 
For a second Mingi was completely frozen to the side. He didn’t know how to act. His brain was almost melting out his ears and he was in complete overdrive. But he shook his head and took a silent step in your direction then a second one and found himself right between your spread legs. He could have cum with just that, just looking at you from that angle just knowing that he could take you right there. But he waited. Immobile. 
“If you want more cock. You’ll have to say it baby” San cooed again in your ear and you faced a dilemma.
You didn’t know if you could really voice out your secret fantasy that way. San never struck you to be the jealous kind but still… he required you to say that and in this second, on the brink of your orgasm, your brain only soaked in sin and lust you couldn’t think of anything else than to be rammed again. You pictured Mingi again in your mind, you imagined what he would feel like inside you, what he would sound like, what he would look like. Fuck… you did want that.
“I-I wish it was Mingi fucking me right now” you said hesitantly but pushing your hips up, spreading your legs even further pushing your soaked and desperate little cunt in the air. 
“Good girl” San whispered, satisfied and gave a nod to Mingi.
Mingi’s heart was about to burst out of chest. The frantic muscle was rattling against his ribs and jumping in his throat then diving back in the pit of his stomach. He was all over the place. He couldn't believe it. He couldn’t believe his ears. He couldn’t believe he heard you say that. Saying out loud you wished another man was inside you instead of your boyfriend. And not any man. Him. 
You wanted him.
His hands were shaking when he grabbed the base of his cock, twitching as he approached it slowly from your core while you grew more and more impatient. 
“Pleaseee” you whined again. “I said it…. now please give me cock” you pleaded. 
As soon as Mingi’s tip touched your entrance you went completely silent and Mingi struggled to do too. When he pushed himself inside you he could have passed out. You were so welcoming, so warm, so tight, so wet. So good. Oh so fucking good. He progressed inside you very slowly earning a long stretched out moan from your end. He couldn't believe he was the one making you feel this way. He was the one pulling those beautiful sounds out of your lips. When he bottomed out he swore he had died and went to heaven. There was no other explanation. The way he felt could only be explained by faith. God was a woman. And that woman was you.
Fuck he needed more of this. He needed to feel you more, to hear you more, to see you more. He wanted it all.
He started to pump himself in and out of you faster, his hand struggling to find a place to settle, finally opting to grab the edge of the vanity. Avoiding direct contact with you, fearing you would recognize him. Rapidly he found himself fucking you (and himself) senseless, rutting his hips like a dog while San watched with a little satisfied smirk, thick cock in hand stroking lazily. 
Your mouth went agape. It felt so good, so fucking good to be finally fucked that deep that rough, exactly how you wanted, the tight feeling in your gut rapidly building up again. But it also felt different. The angle was different. It felt like San’s dick wasn’t hitting the same spot as usual, it also felt slightly curved upwards. And longer. And what about the hands, the touches? San always holds you at the waist, always stuffs his fingers in your mouth? Why wasn't he touching you?
In a flash you ripped the blind fold off your eyes and opened them. At first the bright lights of the vanity behind you blinded you for a short second. The first thing you saw was the tuft of dampened fiery orange hair. Then your vision cleared out and you saw Mingi right between your legs, sharp brows deeply furrowed, lips pressed into a thin line and smashing himself into you at an unbelievable pace. 
The shock you felt tightened your stomach and you came on the spot.
To see Mingi fucking you this hard, take so much pleasure with it and struggling to keep quiet while he fucked you secretly. You didn’t need anything more. 
“F-fuc- Min-gi” you whined as your legs tensed up and your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your mouth agape.
“Y-y/n” Mingi whispered, his hands flying to your hips at that very second you opened your eyes, the many rings on his fingers digging into your skin and without a doubt marking you for the next couple of days. His strong grip grounding you into the vanity to fuck you deeper, faster, better.
You creamed around his cock, your back arched up, your pretty moans and your cunt fluttering around him took Mingi right with you to cloud 9. He couldn’t stop his hips from ramming into you while he delivered scorching hot ropes of thick cum right into your avid little hole. Spasming and twitching. To him it felt like your pussy was trying to milk him dry as he moaned your name a thousand times while bent over you until his hips became sloppy and he eventually came to a stop.
“Awww.” San said as he looked at the both of you disheveled and out of breath, both coming down from your highs. “You both came looking at each other. That's cute” But then he wrapped his hands around your jaw to turn your head to him. “But that made me a little jealous. Don't you think you need to make it up to me, darling?”
Mingi pulled out, out of breath you felt the hot cum running down your pussy and dripping onto the floor. San placed his hand on Mingi’s shoulder and he switched places to join your side.
“Look at that?” San said, crouching down, inspecting your twitching little pussy. “Eventhough you were just fucked full of cum I can tell you want more, baby”
You nodded frantically at the idea of being filled up again.
“Please yes”
San pushed his cock inside you with ease. Mingi’s load providing the perfect lube.
“I slide right in, baby. ” San grunted. After all this teasing he found himself to be closer to his breaking point then he anticipated. “You got her nice and lubed up for me, man.” He sent a cheeky wink to Mingi.
You were just right back down from cumming a short while ago but you found yourself moaning loud for your boyfriend’s cock. It felt so good and soon you were begging him to fuck you harder.
“Please Sannie faster” you said.
“Of course princess I’ll fuck Mingi’s cum right back into your hole he said with a smirk to his friend before smashing himself in. He too was moaning like you were both alone not having a care in the world of what could have been happening outside the dressing room. And soon enough Mingi was hard again.
“Baby, your new boyfriend needs help over there.” San said between moans, drawing your attention back on Mingi again, as he was standing there idle, painful cock laying heavy in his balled fist.
“Please Mingi let me suck your cock” you asked looking right back up at him as your body was jolted up with San’s every move. You didn’t even let Mingi think about it for a second. Your lips instinctively found his beet red tip and you rounded your mouth around it. 
He tasted too good, you relished in the strong flavour and aroma of his cum mixed with your own nectar. It tasted sinful but oh so fucking right. This taste and the way his cock smoothly glided in your tongue made your mind go completely blank. Your tongue focussing on his tip between every come and go around his shaft to collect the precious salty precum you earned along with every grunt, every pant, every whimper from the tall man. You couldn’t have enough of it and you kept on sucking his cock. Relentlessly trying to get another load out of him.
Mingi felt so fucking sensitive right after cumming but it also felt so good.  His strong hand flew to your hair as he grabbed a big fistfull. Instinctively pulling on it to keep you from gobbling up his cock that still felt very sensitive, his moans went up in pitch with overstimulation.
“You’re a real fucking whore for his cock, arent you, Angel?” San asked as he landed a sharp and unexpected slap on your cunt. Making you pop Mingi out of your mouth to look back at your boyfriend again. The delicious sting made you arch your back.
“A-again pleaseee” you said through gritted teeth as San smirked and made your wish come true, slapping your eager little cunt again, making you clench around him harder, making him falter ever so slightly.
Mingi was now pumping his cock over your face, you heard as clear as day the squelching sounds of his spit and cum coating his cock as he stroked it right over you.
San was rubbing tight circles on your swollen reddened clit and ramming into you with all his might. You knew you weren’t going to last long.
“Sannie I’m gonna c-” another sharp slap landed onto your sensitive clit, making you cry out a whimper.
“Not yet, whore. Make your new boyfriend cum first”. San nodded his head in Mingi’s direction.
You were so far gone, mind, body and soul only filled with cock that you didn’t even catch how San referred to Mingi. You were ready to do anything for your boyfriend to finally let you cum so you turned your attention  back to Mingi.
“Please Mingi give me your cum, pleasepleaseplease. Want your cum all over my face.”
Mingi didn’t need more. It flipped a switch inside him to see you spread open by San’s cock but getting your undivided attention to beg for his cum like it was the most precious substance on earth. 
“Fuck y/n” he said in a strangled moan. “Want my cum huh?” the grip on your hair tightened, making the veins of his forearm pop.
“Yes yes yes yes yes pleaseplease” 
“Fuck you’re so good to me. Fuckkkkk… Y/n I love you” he confessed in a breath right before letting out thick ropes of cum that split your face in two from chin to forehead. “I love you I love you I love you” he chanted, both his heart and body finally letting out what he’s been holding back for years. The pleasure made his head spin, more cum crashing onto your nose and lips which you licked hurriedly to get the chance to taste him again.
“Good girl” San said, picking up the pace as he never stopped fucking into you. “You’re so pretty with all this cum on you. Your pretty pussy full of cum and your pretty fucking face too” he said his thrusts becoming sloppier.
“Want another load, Princess?” he asked strong shoulders bulging out as he gripped your waist tighter, bruising your skin and joining Mingi’s ring marks. 
“Yes please cum inside sannie” you whined throwing your head back “Please I want your c-hmppph” your words caught in your throat when Mingi started to rub circles on your clit, adding another layer of pleasure. ��Fuckkk” you cried.
“P-please… more… c-cum” you said, your brain completely tuning out to let your primal instinct take the lead. 
“Fuck baby I’m so close San said. 
“Me too.. I-” right at this moment Mingi lightly slapped your pussy and it was the last straw. You were pushed over the edge and Mingi continued to give little fast slaps to your sensitive clit, making you shake as your cum gushed out of you in translucent and powerful streams.
“Fuckkk I’m c-cumming” San said as he delivered more cum inside your hole, joining Mingi’s and mixing together. You completely lost your mind on the feeling of how full you felt while San was pumping another big load into you and Mingi was repeatedly slapping your pretty pussy then switching to quick circles again that gradually slowed down to a stop.
When San pulled out he looked at you with a warm smile that made his eyes into crescents.
“Isn’t she pretty like this?” he asked Mingi, who was looking at you with just as much love.
“Yeah, she is” he breathed out while you gradually came back to your senses.
“Should we make it official?” San asked peeling his eyes off you to look at his friend. 
“What?” Mingi asked, clueless.
“Well the three of us are together now.” San said before turning his attention to you again “Isn't that right, darling?” and you nodded.
“Well Mingi, next time if you want to confess in the middle of a fuck how about you take me out on a date before cumming on my face?” You said scraping the cum on your cheeks into your mouth and sucking on your fingers and San chuckled but Mingi protested looking affronted.
“Hey! You asked me to!”
Tumblr media
a/n: i had so much fun writing this i hope you liked reading my babes <3
ateez masterlist | navigation
taglist: @jonghospookiedookie @ateezbbys @mingi-chilli-con-carne @walkingtravesty97 @staytiny816 @fancyglam24 @simpforateezforever @heyitsmetonid @acetruepunk @shineekrystalzzz @hwallazia @kierraperkins3 @seeoonghwaa @dawn-iscozy @miniminkis @itza-meee @bittersweetsparadise @oiminho @nebulousbookshelf @seonghwasbobaeyes @certifiedmoa @mulletjoonsupremacy @therealcuppicake @v-lvs-yungi @yourfatherlucifer @minkiverse @choisanboobenthusiast @wisejudgedragonhairdo @mustbeaweasleyginger (i tagged everyone that asked for part 2 hope you dont mind tell me if u wanna be removed)
2K notes · View notes
cregansdingdong · 29 days
Note
dingdong hear me out, cregan and reader going through the honeymoon stage of their marriage in winterfell where he just cant get off her and they get it on (she gets on should i say 😜) EVERYWHERE and ANYWHERE. im talking in the stables just out of earshot of the lords in the courtyard, in the wolfswood surrounded by the beautiful northern countryside, in the council chambers, on the table, EVERYWHERE. I KNOW this man gets hot knowing anyone could catch them and that they couldn’t do anything about it because he is their lord. PLEASE GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
- fellow cregan worshipping anon xo
I HAVE THOUGHTS. THE GEARS ARE TURNING. I FEEL THEM TURNING. SEND HELP ANON.
Let's get something perfectly clear, my beloved, the honeymoon stage never ends with Cregan. Now, it might slow down after the birth of a few kiddos ten but in no way, shape, or form will your Lord Wolf ever be satisfied. That being said, you have my prayers, sorrows, and congratulations also my envy ofc if you both are ever caught getting your freak on. It's gonna go a little something like this...
ʜᴏɴᴇʏᴍᴏᴏɴ. (thoughts ver.)
NSFW stuff under the cut. 18+ only. I'm not responsible for the content you choose to consume. ty.
₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊
"We're going to—"
"I don't care." He grunts. Skirts lifted up the curve of her ass, his hips rutting into her at a pace desperate enough to bruise. They were both frantic, fucking like it was their last day alive. The council room was empty—which it usually was; only really filled when Cregan felt the need to call on his vassals. If it had been a regular day, Lord and Lady Stark wouldn't have had anything to worry about.
His wife presses her cheek down on the table, holding onto the oak edges for dear life, mewling of course, as he rocked into her like a man possessed. Controlled entirely by his need, by her whines for him, Cregan thought he could die a happy man right there in her snug cunt. He could. He wanted to, in a way, the last sensations in the living world being her velvety walls, clenching around him with every swift thrust.
They were loud as they always were—unintentionally. It was too good to remember any restraint. Not that it mattered to the Lord Wolf, he was the Lord paramount of the North. Who was going to tell him he couldn't make love with his wife? No one, but he could at least make an effort to lock the door first. Rabid grunts and the sound of his hefty balls slapping against her flooded the corridor as the entrance to the council room was opened. "Seven Hells—"
His bannermen. His vassals. The meeting. Gods. He forgot about the meeting. Torrhen Manderly turned right back around, narrowly avoiding whatever it was that Cregan flung towards the door—thankfully fast enough to stop the other men from following in after him. "Get out!" The door was promptly slammed shut, right as his wife lifted her head from the table, face flushed red in mortification. "Were we just cau—fuck!" Lord Stark still didn't care, reaching around to rub at her pretty clit as his cock resumed pistoning against her ass. And as she came for at least the third time that morning, the realization of getting caught was quickly erased from the front of her mind, Cregan's teeth latching on to the curve of her shoulder as he chased his release.
okay I can't help myself so here's a bonus bit:
Redressed and thoroughly embarrassed some twenty minutes later, Lady Stark emerges from the council room, expecting her handmaiden to be waiting—no. Gods. They'd waited. They'd actually waited. Seven bannermen, each one avoiding her eye more than the last, probably in an attempt to maintain whatever was left of her dignity. They made not a single sound as she walked sprinted by, nodding stiffly in respect to their Lady.
Cregan, however, did not share that same sentiment. Satisfied for the moment, smug, and seated lazily at the head of the table, legs spread comfortably as he sat back against his chair. He exhaled quietly through his nose once his vassals entered the room, the smallest of smirks written on his face that said more than his mouth ever could. "Where did we leave off last time?"
₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊
721 notes · View notes
tsukiyo-7 · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
This is me trying to bypass Tumblr censorship, attempt 1
Just in case, the full fanart is on ao3
Details under the cut! (It's a bit long, I'm warning you)
Here's the frankly too long explaination.
I basically crammed in this drawing all my favourite motifs and all of my studies.
The tattoo on Sam's back is something I designed myself and represents Mater Dolorosa (Our Lady of Sorrows or Madonna Addolorata) with a stanza from the prayer "Stabat Mater" that goes as folows - "Through her soul, of joy bereaved, bowed with anguish, deeply grieved, now at length the sword hath passed."
Then we have Saint Michael slaughtering the Devil on Dean's arm. This is a mesh up of different stock images; usually Saint Michael stands over a serpent not a dragon and has a sword, not a halberd, those come from Saint George (Patron Saint of soldiers, so not a random choice)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Then there's the scripts. (Open the first pic)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The roman numbers on Dean's collarbone: II.V.XCIII = 2.5.83, Sam's date of birth.
The matching latin tattoos on their bicepts: The whole quote actually is "Nec tecum, nec sine te vivere possum" by Ovidius, which means "I can't live with you nor without you" and I thought of splitting it like that because I think it sums up their relationship pretty well. They can't be together, especially Sam imo (forever the runaway), because it's basically self-destructive, but being apart maybe is even worse (suicidal Dean anyone?).
A mandala with a mantra on Sam's tigh: गते गते पारगते पारसंगते बोधि स्वाहा . The Devanāgarī, for those unfamiliar, is a South Asian writing system. Here we have the mantra that closes the Heart Sutra "Gone, gone, gone to the other shore, Awakening, Svaha." (Svaha is the Hindu goddess of sacrifices; in a Buddhist context the term is used as denoument for mantras, espicially duing rites and offerings).
The characters on Dean's bicept, next to Saint Michael: 天罰. Those are technically Hanja aka Traditional Chinese characters used to write Korean (mostly because I first encountered this word in my korean phylology studies and that's how I know it), but they mean the same thing in Korean, Chinese and Japanese, "Divine Punishment", sooo - the only difference is the ponunciation. Korean: 천벌 (cheonbeol) Japanese: てんばつ (tenbatsu) Chinese: 天罚 (tiān fá).
Lastly, on Dean ribs, say hi to my bestie Hammurabi and his famous Code: here we have the Law 196 which actually even rocks know about; An eye for an eye. The full text says: "If a man has blinded the eye of another man, his eye will be blinded." Can't really offer you a transcript but if you're curious here's the transliteration:
" šum-ma a-wi-lum i-in DUMU a-wi-lim úḫ-tap-pí-id i-in-šu ú-ḫa-ap-pa-du " There's this really neat website here that is a digital version of the whole code and it's also my source.
251 notes · View notes
trippinsorrows · 21 days
Text
looking through your eyes + fourteen
Tumblr media
authors note: swear this was the chapter that never fucking ended. it's essentially part one because even with how long it is, i still have a lot to cover. 😩
anywayssss, some foreshadowing, a ton of fluff, and some long awaited moments below.
if any cw/tw’s are missed, please let me know, and i will add them!
cw/tw: fluff, angst, smut
song inspo: ‘looking through your eyes’ by leann rimes
masterlist
words: 15k (sorrows, sorrows, prayers)
“Did they hurt?” The question is asked while sitting on top of Roman’s lap, the default seat for her, it seems, whenever she’s in his presence. Her fingers ghost over his inked skin, slightly fascinated by the intricacies of the design. Tribal. A nod to his heritage and his story.
Like most, if not all things with Solana, he answers truthfully. “Not really, but I have a high pain tolerance, so it’s hard to say.” For some reason, that makes her frown a bit. Was that a natural inherited thing or some level of tolerance built up from years of said pain? “Do you want any?”
She nods, tracing one of the patterns with her finger. “In Mexican culture, Hummingbirds represent many things. Strength. Love. But, the thing my mom always focused on and stressed to me is they’re also messengers from the spirits in heaven. That…they remind us of lost loved ones.” Her shoulders lift a little. Small, sad smile on her face. “Sometimes, I think I’d like to get one tattooed on me. Like…like a tribute to her, but then I think about the needle and don’t know if that could trigger me somehow.”
It could trigger from a couple different angles, but namely her trauma with knives as well as her history of self-harming. But, Solana is certain Roman already recognizes this, thus her not going into specifics. “I don’t know. I’ll….I’ll think about it some more.”
Roman nods, offering, “if you decide to get it, I’ll go with you.” 
It’s a thoughtful gesture, not entirely surprising. Solana is starting to recognize there’s very little the man underneath her wouldn’t do for her. 
Appreciatively kissing his cheek, she murmurs, “thank you.” Biting on her lip, she foolishly tries to see if she can get something else out of him. “Speaking of going….”
Roman chuckles. “I’m not telling you.” He rolls his eyes as she pouts almost, his thumb going to her cheek, the cut almost entirely healed. “You’ll find out in a couple hours.”
It’s been almost a week since the gala, and the temperature has settled tremendously. Roman still doesn’t like thinking about it, thinking about how he lost his fucking shit but mostly at the fact that Solana was attacked. 
He’s about to start having someone with her at all times. Even in the bathroom. 
Roman has also noticed there seems to be some conflicted emotions on Solana’s end regarding what happened in the bathroom. Namely because she caught wind of Wes injuries, injuries that are truly tame compared to what Roman would have done and will do once he gets his hands on that son of a bitch.
But, he is him, and Solana is her. They are very different people. She is gentle where he is hard, so while there is still that adrenaline and proudness she was experiencing at defending herself as well as she did, he can see it’s something that’s bothering her.
He’s tried to bring it up, but she shuts down, so he’s left it alone out of respect.
But, with her birthday being tomorrow and them leaving in a couple hours for their trip, he’s hopeful getting away will be good for her. For them. 
She then asks a bit of a silly question considering who she’s talking to. Roman plans for every little thing, from the most major detail to the thing that most likely won’t happen but still serves as something that needs to be accounted for. “Is….is it at least domestic? I don’t have a passport.” 
“Yes, you do.” He opens the first drawer of his desk, pulling out a small Louis Vuitton passport cover and hands it to her.
Solana looks down with a gasp seeing that she, in fact, has a passport. A brand new, unstamped passport. “How did you—”
An easy answer. “I’m a billionaire, Solana. There’s nothing I can’t buy or make happen.”
It makes sense, but it doesn’t do much to chip away the tremendous amount of guilt and how bad she feels in learning that Roman’s birthday was back in May, and no one said or did a thing about it or acknowledged it.
She can still feel her stomach dropping when she asked a few days about when his is, and he calmly informed that it had already passed. That hurt. Truly. To know what should be a special occasion was essentially treated as any other day.
His explanation made sense. He expressed not liking to acknowledge his birthday because of what happened when he was 10. She can understand that. She does understand that, but it doesn’t make her feel any less sad at the fact that she didn’t even know it was her husband’s freaking birthday. 
Solana expresses said concern. “But…it’s….it’s not fair we’re doing all this for my birthday, and I didn't even know yours—”
“Hey—” He interrupts her, his hands cupping her face. “Don’t do that.” He pushes back some of her hair. “My story is my story. Not yours.” She opens her mouth clearly to protest or counter when his eyes take on a mischievous glint. “Besides, seeing you half naked most of the day for a week? Might as well be my fucking birthday.”
Solana rolls her eyes. He has a way of making her feel better in the most interesting and often raunchy sort of way. Blushing and smiling at his suggestive comment, she shrugs, admitting, “there are more bathing suits in my suitcase than clothes.”
“Good. The less clothes you have on, the better.” Her cheeks must be a red mess. Roman taps on her hip, gesturing for her to stand up. He also stands and takes her hand in his. “Come here. There’s something I want to show you.”
Solana looks down at her outfit which is most definitely nothing appropriate enough to leave the house in. “Are we leaving the house or—”
“No.” His answer is simple and to the point that she doesn’t really press him for more information as he guides her through the house. A frown does fall on her face, however, when she sees he’s taken her down the hall where he’d said construction was previously taking place.
It’s only then she finally asks, “what—”
“Close your eyes.”
Solana makes a face. “Roman, what are you—”
He steps towards her, pushing back her hair. “You know I don’t like repeating myself.” If she was anyone else, Solana is certain his tone would be much different. A lot darker, harsher. But, it’s not. Just….strangely calm. 
Blowing out a breath, she relents, realizing there’s not really an option for anything else. “Okay.” Shutting her eyes, she allows him to continue to guide her, stopping for a moment as she hears a door open. He directs her to walk through said opened door followed by a light switch, the presence of that light shining against her closed eyes. 
Solana feels him shift behind her, his arms snaking around her, mouth dipping to her ear. “Open em’.”
Solana doesn't need to be told twice, and as soon as they’re open, a gasp leaves her mouth. Naturally, she walks away from him, deeper into the room that has an open floor plan, walls almost entirely lined with white, empty shelves. Bookshelves. Against the walls and the cutout part of the room. Not to be confused with the other nook that’s occupied by seating, pillows, and anything else someone would need if indulging in reading or writing.
Walking further into the space, she sees another area clearly curated for another purpose. Art. A table to create on, two easels, countless art supplies all perfectly situated near the bay window that allows for natural sunlight. 
The perfect place to create. 
Taken completely back by the surprise of it all, Solana turns to Roman, stammering to ask, “is–is this for me?”
“You know it’s damn sure not for me.” He steps toward her again, gently pulling her against him. “You were outgrowing that space. And your journals are personal. They shouldn’t be kept at work.” His thumb brushes across her bottom lip. “They should be here. This is your home now.”
“Roman….” She looks around again, tears growing in her eyes. 
He continues to explain. “It would have been ready sooner, but when I found out you like art, I had them add that.” He gestures to the corner that has to be any artist's dream. “I’m not smart about a lot of that shit, so just let me know anything else you ne—”
He’s silenced by Solana practically jumping him, angling her body to face him as she wraps her arms around his neck. A hug, deep and sentimental. It takes him off guard for a second, Roman unused to such….affection.
But, the discomfort settles into something that almost feels natural. His hand on the small of her back as he chuckles. “I’m gonna take it that you like it then.” It’s not necessarily a question as much as an assessment. 
She gives a watery chuckle, pulling back and nodding. “I love it.” Her voice breaks. “No…..no one’s ever done anything like this for me before.” It goes without saying this doesn't include her mom, who Roman is almost certain did more for her than anyone ever could. Especially when she needed it the most.
Doesn’t mean he can’t do his part though. 
She swallows, whispering as he wipes away her tears. “Thank you.” 
“What I tell you about that, huh?” He ghosts his lips over hers, reminding yet again. “You never have to thank me for anything.” Roman kisses her forehead, seeing how her eyes shut from feeling content and partially overwhelmed. It brings a small smile to his face. “Happy birthday, Solana….”
________
“Oh my god….”
Roman doesn’t have to be looking up to know what’s caught Solana’s attention. It’s obvious by the way the SUV has come to a stop, shifting into park as they’ve clearly reached their destination.
And she’s clearly looking up at said destination. Well, the conduit to help them travel to said destination.
When he finishes sending out an email, one of the last before he goes into somewhat work blackout—because he never be fully disconnected—he looks up to see Solana still staring out the window. 
“Is that….is that a private jet?”
Smirking, Roman slides his phone in his bag and removes his seatbelt. “You really think I fly commercial?”
It’s not intended to come across as rude, and it isn't judging by her small smile. “They’re bigger than I imagined….”
“Mine is.” Double entendre, if he really wanted to make her blush, but he keeps it PG. For now. “I’m tall. Need the leg room.”
Roman exits the SUV at the same time the driver opens the door for Solana to do the same. He easily circles back around to her just in time for her to sling her small backpack on her shoulder and adjust her ball cap. In sneakers without any sort of height boost, she looks even tinier than she already is, especially compared to his massive build. 
Taking her hand, Roman asks, “you ready?”
She nods as he leads them over to the descended stairs where the pilot and two flight attendants stand outside, greeting them. The older man, Bob, he thinks, lifts his hat and nods respectfully in their direction.
“Mr. Reigns. Mrs. Reigns. Everything is just as you requested.”
Roman only gives a nod to acknowledge things being exactly as they should. His way.
He motions for Solana to walk up ahead of him, mainly so he can enjoy the view of her ass in the tight ass outfit she has on but also out of manners.
Manners he only seems to be able to find in her presence. 
She loiters a bit near the entrance, moving aide for him to also fully enter but still stands almost frozen, clearly taken back by the interior. 
“This is….”
“The best,” he finishes for her, tossing his bag on the closest beige sofa that lines both sides of the jet. Roman moves over to her, hand palming her ass as he dips his head to whisper in her ear. “I don’t accept anything less.”
She giggles against him, the sound hands down one of the best songs on the soundtrack when they’re interrupted by someone clearing their throat.
Momentarily considering murder for probably the fifth time today, Roman turns to see Paul standing at the bottom of the steps. Roman literally forgot this man was in the SUV behind them, coming to see them off.
Paul lifts his hand to shield his eyes from the sun, asking with all of the unease. “A word, please, my Tribal Chief?”
The automatic answer would be no if not for Solana turning around and placing her hand on his chest. A frequent gesture he never gets tired of. Any touch from her is always welcomed.
Her smile dips a bit as she asks with the same level of unease shared by Paul, “is—is it okay if I look around?”
Her question makes him scowl. Her asking him permission to do anything feels uncomfortable as fuck. “You don’t have to ask my permission for shit. Anything that’s mine is yours.”
His answer seems to ease her anxiety at least as she nods, kisses his cheek and starts to explore the rest of the jet. Roman’s eyes linger on her a bit before he switches his attention to his annoying ass head council.
Stomping down the steps with all of the agitation, he barks, “talk.”
Paul clears his throat, and Roman’s already regretting his decision to choose his Wise Man over his fine ass wife.
“Sir, I—I understand you wanting to take the girl—”
“Solana,” Roman corrects one time only. Because that was Paul’s one time referring to Solana as anything other than her name or his wife. “Her name is Solana.”
Paul swallows. “Of course.” He’s a quick learner, smartly running it back for a second, correct time. “I understand you wanting to take Solana away for her birthday, but is the timing really great? There’s so much work—”
“There’s always work to do, Wise Man. That’s why I delegated the appropriate tasks to cover the appropriate work while I’m gone.” It was a bit trickier than that as delegation has never been a preference for Roman. His ultimate preference is to always handle shit on his own. And truth be told, he made sure to sign off, approve, create, and orchestrate any major moves that needed to be done before leaving. The remaining tasks were split among Jimmy, Jey, and Rikishi. And he has no doubt they’ll be on top of it. Because as always, when it comes to business, the twins never miss. It’s just any other time they’re bumbling idiots who give Roman migraines from time to time. 
“Of course. Always so conscientious, my Tribal Chief.” Paul’s smile makes Roman want to turn and walk away yet again for the second time in two minutes. Granted, that’s his usual disposition when interacting with anyone other than his wife. “I just—for you to be out of the country for almost a week. Well, it’s just—”
“Wise Man.”
Paul’s eyes light up, and it has nothing to do with the sun that’s shining in his direction. “Yes, my Tribal Chief?”
“How long have I been the Tribal Chief?”
The answer is almost instantaneous, a small smile falling on Paul’s pudgy face. “Since you were eighteen-years-old.”
“How old am I now?”
“My Tribal Chief turned 39 on May 25th of this year.”
“And in all that time, how many vacations have I taken?”
There’s brief hesitation, eyes traveling for a brief second, searching for the answer. “N–none, my Tribal Chief.”
“Exactly.” Roman lifts his shades and sets them atop his head. “So, if I want to take a couple fucking days off to help my wife celebrate her birthday, then that’s what I’m gonna fucking do, and I don’t have to answer to a damn person about it. Because I feel like you’re questioning me, Wise Man, and I don’t get questioned. Is that understood?”
Paul’s fat cheeks are painted an ugly shade of red as he stammers out, “y–yes, my Tribal Chief.”
Semi pleased with the acquiescence, Roman turns around and calls out coldly, “only contact me for emergencies.”
Roman is almost certain Paul will be too scared shitless to risk his wrath with an outreach that’s only subjectively considered an emergency vs Roman’s definition. He’ll probably task Rikishi or the twins with the task. 
Roman would prefer their old man over them. Less antics and constant triggers for his anger.
The head of the table finds his wife still in the main section of the jet, sitting down on the sofa, legs pulled up under her, phone in hand. Hearing his return, she smiles, sharing, “I was just texting Naomi to make sure she grabbed Dulce’s favorite toy.”
Roman chuckles and walks over, joining her on the sofa. “The dog has a favorite toy?”
Smiling, she explains, “it’s the one she plays with the most. Her avocado.” Solana angles her body so she’s facing him more versus the other sofa that lines the other side of the plane. “Do—do you think she’ll be okay? We’ve never left her before.”
To be fair, Roman briefly thought about that. She’s so fucking little and still a puppy, so leaving her could be risky. But, he also knows that damn thing seems to always be hopping on Naomi and Bayley’s lap, so she should be fine.
“She’ll probably sleep the majority of the time we’re gone.”
Solana rolls her pretty eyes, her mouth curving into a small smile. “I’m serious, Roman.”
“So am I.” He sighs and brings his arm around her, pulling her into his side. “She’ll be fine, Solana. It’s not like we left her with Jey and psycho ass Nicki with their bad ass kids.”
Forever the saint, she pouts and lightly scolds him. “That’s not nice. I’m sure they’re not bad.”
“You ain’t met them yet,” Roman scoffs. “Why you think Jey always at our place?”
Smiling cheekily, she gently points out, “you said it’s because I keep feeding them.”
“That too.” Roman trails his finger up and down her upper forearm, her soft skin a contrast to his coarse fingertips. Her perfume, something sweet, vanilla, and gourmand doesn’t help him keep focus on the conversation nor the fact that she’s so close to him, their bodies touching him. His desire for physical contact, of any kind, with her has been heightened a bit in recent days. “That’s why you don’t feed fucking strays. Cause they keep coming back.”
Solana peers up at him, giggling, “you’re so mean to them sometimes.” Shifting her position so that her legs are laid out the opposite side of Roman, her back pressed against his side. His big arm is over her chest, her hands on his forearm. “I think….I think you like them more than you let on.”
“Really?” 
She nods, further explaining. “I don’t….I don’t think you would let them be as close to you as they are if you didn’t.”
Perceptive. Roman pegged that about Solana a while ago, when they first started writing, her previous preferred form of communication. She’s not entirely wrong. As fucking crazy Jimmy and Jey drive Roman, they’ve also been the two best and really only examples of friendships he has. Not to mention they’re family. 
“They’re….tolerable.”
She looks up at him, asking almost nervously, “and what am I?”
Such a good question that’s both simple and complicated. The easy answer is his wife. That’s just fact. Law. But the complex answer, the complex answer is that she’s so much more than that. That she’s become so much more than that. Where Roman finds himself craving her presence. A rarity for someone who typically avoids and shies away from social interactions like the plague.
Dipping his head to kiss her forehead, he answers in a low, steady voice, “my Lo’u Au.”
Her eyes flutter shut a bit as she murmurs, “it’s not fair you say things to me you know I can’t understand.” Roman watches her once again move around, this time sliding one leg over so that she’s sitting on his lap, straddling him. He doesn’t hesitate in moving his hands to the bottom of her ass, lifting her so she’s closer to him, her breast nearly touching his chest. Solana tilts her head to the side, whispering, “Yo siento muy bien contigo.”
Having her like this, so close against him, it doesn’t help that resolve, doesn’t do shit about the fact that his dick stiffens whenever she touches him. Like she is now. His eyes dip to her lips, so soft and full. “And what does that mean?”
Solana also seems to be on the same wavelength, her eyes also dropping to his mouth as she whispers with a small smile. “I’ll tell you when you tell me.”
Eyes shutting, Roman groans and tugs her even closer, her arms around his neck. “God, you drive me fuckin’ crazy.” Roman kisses her. Kisses her with all of the intensity and desire and borderline need he harbors for this woman.
And then she moans. She fucking moans in his mouth. His dick nearly fucking jerks as he stands up with her in his arms, Solana gasping and breaking the kiss to look around. “Roman….”
He needs to have his mouth on her, lips kissing the underline of her jaw as he brings them to the back of the jet, to the bed. He’s careful in how he lays her down, mindful of how she tugs on his shirt, pulling him on top of her and resuming their passionate kiss. 
Roman’s hands roam her body, but he pays extra attention to her breast, so big and soft, pillow soft under his hand as he kneads them, mindful of the way her nipples continue to harden under his touch.
“Roman….” Solana is breathing heavily, once again breaking their kiss, something he would otherwise be objected to if not for the two tiny words that leave her mouth. “Touch me.” 
His eyes widen a bit as he asks, almost unsure he heard her right. “What?”
Mouth parted, she licks her lips and again reiterates her previous request. “I—I want you to touch me.”
If not for not wanting to insult her intelligence, he’d remind her he is. He's touching her everywhere she’s previously admitted him access to. But, Roman would never do that nor is he stupid. He knows exactly what she’s referring to. And there’s suddenly a part of him that feels bad, wonders if she somehow thought that was the reason for him taking them to the bed. It wasn’t that. He just wanted privacy, wanted to give her that privacy. 
“Solana, I wasn’t—”
“Roman,” she says his name again, firmer, more committed almost to her request. “I trust you.” Three words. Three little words that pack such a heavy, emotional punch. “You’re…you’re going to have to when we finally…” She trails off, shaking her head. “Pl—please.” 
He shuts his eyes, jaw clenching. That one word alone coming from her is such a dangerous thing. Dangerous because it's incapable to say no to.
But, he doesn’t necessarily have to because her hand is on his, slowly moving it down from her breast, traveling down the span of her stomach and the top of her black pants. But instead of remaining there, Solana guides it under her waistband, her tour stopping when the palm of his hand presses softly on her mons pubis, still protected under the cotton of her underwear. Her eyes shut at this contact, but it’s when his fingers flitter near the space between her legs that she gasps.
His eyes snap to hers as he’s quick to ask, “do you want me to stop?”
And she’s immediately shaking her head ‘no,’ explain, “I’m just—not used to it.” She’s already so sensitive to his touch. Roman can’t even imagine what this level of sensitivity is going to look like when they go all the way. “It’s okay.” She’s again reassuring him, even spreading her thighs a bit, giving him better access.
Roman is hard as a fucking rock, but he taps into expert level self-control as he moves his other hand to her waistband, giving a slight tug. “Can I?”
She answers in a soft voice. “Yes.”
Solana lifts her hips as he slides her black pants down her shapely legs, his mouth practically watering to see and have so much of her soft skin exposed to him. He moves his hand to caress the skin of her inner thighs. She sighs, content, and this serves as more motivation to continue his efforts in following through on her task. 
Again, he’s making sure to catch her gaze. “Do….”
And once again, she partially takes him by surprise as she closes her eyes and instead of giving him the approval to remove the only remaining article of clothing keeping her covered from him, Solana takes her fingers to her underwear and pushes down, lifting her hips slightly until they're hooked around her ankles and kicked onto the floor.
Mouth previously watering, Roman feels a sudden, intense amount of dehydration. She’s completely bare and exposed to him, her cunt so smooth and pretty, lips glistening already just from their makeout.
If not for her trauma, he’d have already had this woman more times than he could count.
But, he’d especially already had her in his mouth. Licking his lips, he does his best to keep composure, maintaining the maturity of a grown ass man vs a horny ass teenage boy whose balls haven’t even dropped.
Once more, he asks, “are you sure?”
It might be overkill to some, but one thing’s for certain, he would never go this far without gaining her consent every step of the way. 
She answers, “yes.” 
Roman nods, starting his hand at the top of her belly, gradually teasing it downward until he’s touching her, long fingers gently caressing her lips, the tips of his fingers gathering some of her essence. “How you already this wet for me?”
It’s more rhetorical than anything, but it’s partially fueled with how her stomach caves in a bit just at that initial touch. Her being so responsive to just his hands does wonders for his ego but also fuels his burning to just make her feel good.
Roman uses long, slow strokes along the areas of her vulva, never taking his eyes off her face, mouth dropping open, eyes slamming shut and head craning back. Pleasure. She feels pleasure. That’s what he wants to see. All he wants to see.
There’s not an ounce of discomfort in sight.
“Roman…” Her moaning his name might be his new favorite song. So needy and wanton. It’s got his erection fighting for its life in his boxers. “Shit….”
He smirks a bit. “Must be good if I got you cussing, baby.” It’s evident in the way she becomes swollen underneath his expert touch, eventually exposing her clit. And it’s then that he brings his thumb to her clit, pressing softly, satisfied when she arches against the bed. “That’s it….”
Such light touches, not a finger entered into her yet, and she’s already so wet. Largely due to sexual deprivation and being touch starved. Of that, he’s certain. To be almost thirty and have never been touched as such as a woman seems almost criminal. He wants to give it to her though. Give her that experience. Give her all of the experiences. 
He works his thumb around her swollen clitoris, small circles, her growing wetness all the lube and slip he needs to work her good, in the way she deserves, in only how he can have her.
“Oh my god…” She’s starting to squirm against the bed, and he fucking loves it. Loves seeing how worked up he can get her. It makes the anticipation of actually being inside of her that much better. He plays around with different touches, different techniques, studying closely what seems to evoke the strongest physical reaction. A sort of a game, a way for him to learn her body, to learn what she likes. But also, for her to learn what she likes.
“You okay?” He checks in with her, seeing her nod ‘yes’ almost frantically. If not for the fact he can see speech is a bit difficult right now, he’d press her on actual words. But, he can extend some grace. “So fucking wet….” She’s a wet, soaking mess, pussy soaking his fingers, her thighs, and the bed under her. Not that he gives a flying fuck. Seeing her like this is better than he could have imagined, just a taste of what it’ll be like to be inside of her. 
But, it’s when he teases a finger near her opening, so wet and sticky that he clenches his jaw. Just that slight probing, and he can already tell how tight she is, can imagine that tightness gripping the mess out of his dick.
Roman carefully enters one finger and observes the way she tenses, whimpers, the way her cunt clenches against him. “Relax….” He coaxes her, talks her through it, allows her to adjust to the unfamiliar stretch while his thumb continues to play with her clit, never once stopping her pleasure train. 
And when she’s adjusted, he enters another finger, stopping there, not wanting to push her too far, recognizing how big this is for her. But when she shifts again, almost rocking against his fingers, Roman responds to her, moving in sync, staying along with her song and dance. He works with her, making the hitherto motion while his other fingers continue to rub and caress her into that higher room, that place of ecstasy. 
Roman can see it coming, can see her coming, see the way she starts to grip the sheets, the biting of her bottom lip.
“I’m—I’m—”
“Ride it out, baby. Let me see how pretty you look when you come on my hand.” His words of affirmation seem to take her over the edge, damn near her entire upper half arching off the bed, her body writing as she gives into the bliss, staying on that train to euphoria. 
Roman keeps his fingers inside of her just long enough to feel that fucking amazing sensation of making her come yet again, and he can’t help himself as he brings his soaked fingers to his mouth, tasting and licking off every bit of her. His eyes shut at her taste, just as fucking sweet as he imagined. 
God, he can’t wait to have this woman. 
Coming to, Solana sits up on her elbows a bit, looking down, becoming aware of just how messy things got. And she seems a bit embarrassed, offering what’s surely the start of an unnecessary apology. “I–oh my—I didn’t.”
Roman says nothing, just gets up and moves to the bathroom, grabbing a towel off the rack and bringing it to her. He’d clean her up himself, but he doesn’t necessarily trust himself to not try for take two.
Letting her handle it is the safest route, but he can work to dissuade any thought or feeling she might have that makes her think she did anything wrong.
“I’ll buy a new fucking mattress every damn day if it means I get to make you come like that.” 
Solana has cleaned herself and the bed as best she can as she reaches to slide her underwear back on. Roman has to push away his disappointment. She has such a pretty pussy. 
Her cheeks are red, partially because of what just occurred but also her naturally shy personality. “You’re really good at that.”
“I’m good at a lot of things, Solana.” He has every intention on eventually showing her just what those remaining things are, but time and place. 
He’ll be as patient with her as she needs. 
After Solana is all cleaned up, returned to a semi state of being adequately dressed, they fall into a sense of normalcy where she lays in bed, reading and writing a bit while he finishes up some work tasks on his laptop right beside her before she drifts off into a sleep that lasts longer than he was expecting.
He’s tempted to wake her when they start to descend, partially wanting her to look out the window at the clear, blue waters that he can admit are impressive looking. But, he decides against it, waiting until they’ve landed and are ready to exit the jet.
Gently shaking her shoulder, he stirs her, “Solana, wake up.” She does so relatively easily, pretty brown eyes blinking a little in confusion as he explains. “We made it.”
Those three words help bring her to a full state of consciousness. He smiles a bit seeing how she moves quicker than what’s probably necessary to get out of the bed and slide her shoes on, looking back at him and reaching for his hand.
Roman closes his laptop and does the same, taking her hand, guiding her out the jet. They’re both instantly met with an intense heat and radiating sun shining in their direction. They’re also met with the staff and security he made sure to have lined up and ready to go upon their arrival.  He walks out first, watching and taking her hand again as she follows him, face turned up in expected confusion. 
But, before she can ask anything, one of the men offers what may be a genuine smile. Not that Roman cares about that.
He flicks his gaze between the two of them. “Welcome to Isla Mujeres, Mr. and Mrs. Reigns….”
A loud gasp next to him is unsurprising, Solana almost spinning to look around, trying to process that she’s really standing on Mexican soil.
She eventually turns to him, eyes wide and then softening into something so warm and appreciative. “Roman…”
“It’s the only way I could get you to myself and away from my annoying ass cousins—” Once again, Roman is cut off by Solana throwing her body against his for a hug that results in him easily picking her up, her legs around his waist.. Similar to the embrace at the home library one. Emotional. Grateful. Happy.
She’s laughing a bit, even with tears burning her vision. “Thank you.”
Roman doesn’t correct her this time, just murmurs a ‘you’re welcome’ and kisses her temple. He  lets her back down, hand moving to her ass. “You’re gonna have to translate while we’re here though.”
Solana shakes her head. Such a small thing in exchange for such a major act of kindness. “That’s fine.” She holds onto his arm as the staff move to take their bags from the jet while security directs them to the SUV.
Solana is looking out the window almost the entire ride, captivated by the scenery, the landscape, the beauty of it all while he’s just focused on the beauty sitting right beside him.
She asks the driver something in Spanish, the answer putting an even bigger smile on her face. She turns to him, asking, “how long are we here for?”
“A week,” Roman answers, noticing the way her eyes light up even more. “Still think we shouldn’t have come?”
She rolls her eyes and playfully shoves her body against his, grabbing his arm and laying her head against his shoulder. “I just….I don’t want to inconvenience you.”
“You could never inconvenience me. I do what I want. You know this.” His lips linger near her hairline. “And I wanted to do this for you.”
“Well, I’m appreciative. So much. You….you don’t know how much this means to me.” 
He thinks he has an idea. 
The ride from the airport to the house is approximately twenty minutes, and just like the moment Solana stepped foot off the jet, she’s got that same look of marvel painted all over her pretty place at the property.
Roman, meanwhile, is just satisfied the pictures didn’t lie. If anything, they didn’t do it justice. 
She’s almost like a child on Christmas as she asks with excitement, “is this where we’re staying?” Before he can answer, she’s indirectly apologizing. “Roman, you didn’t have to spend so much money on this place. We’re only going to be here a week. We could have just—”
“I’m rich, Solana. I only do ownership.”
Her jaw drops again. “You bought this?” He nods. She scoffs, looking around, trying to process the fact that she’s technically standing on her property. “So….so we could come back?” 
“I don’t know how often I could come with you, but you’re welcome to come and go as you please.” It goes without saying she’d have hefty security detail as well as either Bayley or Naomi attending, but beyond that, Roman could never see himself denying her this. Denying her the opportunity to connect more with her maternal side since the paternal side has only ever caused her nothing but heartache.
Here, there’s a chance to rewrite the chapter. 
She walks over to him, holding onto his forearm, asking almost tentatively. “Can I look around the house?”
“How about we do this instead?” She looks genuinely curious as he explains. “If it’s regarding your safety, you ask. If not, you just do it.” Roman’s unsurprised by her unsure expression. “I don’t get to decide how you live your life. That’s all you.”
“Unless it could present a safety risk?”
“Exactly. Cause in that case, the answer is probably no.” A part of him dislikes having a caveat, but in the world they live in, with him being who he is, he can’t take any risks. He won’t take any risks. Not when it comes to her.
Ever.
Solana nods as if she understands better now. She slides her hand down, taking his with hers as she lightly tugs on his arm. “Come with me.”
It’s an easy request. There’s not much she could ask he’d say no to. If anything. 
Solana is just as amazed by the inside of the house as the outside, especially the kitchen, the first thing she gravitates to. Naturally.
“We have to go shopping,” she shares. “So I can cook.”
“Solana, you’re not cooking while we’re here.” She frowns, a pout almost on her pretty face. “We’re celebrating your birthday. The fuck I look like you making you cook on something that’s supposed to be for you? I hired a chef for us.”
Her frown softens a bit as she lays her hand on his chest. “You’re not making me do anything. I—I like cooking. You know this.”
“I know you do, but I want you to relax and enjoy yourself while we’re here.” His hands move down to her ass. “Starting with the pool in the back.”
A small smile grows on her face. “There’s a pool?”
He nods, imagining that sexy body of hers clad in one of those skimpy two pieces he told Bayley and Naomi to make sure she purchased plenty of. “I told you. Half naked, baby.” She giggles as he squeezes her ass and lightly pushes on his chest, separating them.
“Where’s our bedroom?”
He has to think about it for a minute. “Down the hall. Should be the first or second room on the right.” Again, she grabs his hand, guiding them based upon his directions. Directions that prove correct, Solana once again taken back by the luxury of it all. The room is damn near bigger than some apartments and provides direct access to the back of the house which houses the pool and hot tub.
“This is all so beautiful…..”
“Hmmm.”
Solana briefly turns from looking out the door when two of the guards bring her and Roman’s luggage into the room. She thanks them, while Roman just seems to glare at them to get them to leave immediately, which they do.
Once alone, she turns to Roman, “can we—” He doesn’t even have to correct her. She does it all on her own. “I—I want to go see the beach.”
He smirks. Assertiveness looks damn good on her. “Then let’s go to the beach.”
________
Roman is both surprised and unsurprised when Solana walks out the bathroom, a cover up partially preventing him from seeing whatever bathing suit she picked. And his disappointment must show as she murmurs, “I’ll take it off when we get there.”
Feeling like it’ll help her feel a bit better, less self-conscious, he informs, “it’ll just be us. I had the beach….cleared, if you will.”
Obviously confused, she wonders aloud, “how….how do you clear a beach?” Solana gasps, lowering her voice as she asks in an almost scared tone. “Did you….did you kill anyone?”
“Not today. Not yet, at least.” The way her eyes widen a bit makes him chuckle. “I’m Roman Reigns, Solana.” He walks past her, adding with all of the arrogance that he can without a doubt back up, “I always get what I want.”
Solana says nothing. Not that she needs to say anything. However, she notices then what Roman was messing with on the bed before she walked out the bathroom. “What is this?” She walks over, reaching for but not touching the camera. “You bought a camera?”
“I’ve had that for years.”
Curious, she less asks and more makes a simple statement, sharing, “I didn’t know you were into photography.”
He shrugs, almost indifferent. Dismissive. “It’s an interest. Haven’t really done much of it in a while.”
“You should,” she encourages. Solana would love to see and support him embrace a side of him that isn’t so deeply embedded in his work that seems never ending. “Especially while we’re here. It’s all so beautiful…”
“I could photograph you and get the same result.”
She smiles, looking away while admitting, “I—I don’t really like having my picture taken.”
“Too bad.” She looks back at him, Roman explaining. “That’s also an insecurity thing. I told you. I’m not letting you feed your insecurities.”
A part of her is grateful for that, grateful for him. Appreciative that he always seems to remind her of these things that she still struggles to notice or believe about herself from time to time. Like the fact that she is beautiful.
“Okay,” she relents, partially knowing it’s not like Roman will give in anyway. “But…but you can’t show them to anyone.”
“Solana, I don’t like sharing you with anyone as it is. You really think I’m trying to share some pictures?” It’s a fair, valid point. “No, I won’t show them to anyone.”
Pleased with the acknowledgement, the two finish getting ready and are out the door in less than 20 minutes. Given the fact that the property is more or less on the water, they opt, more Solana, asks to walk versus driving. Roman isn’t opposed. The beach is cleared, security is roaming the property, not to mention it’s a beautiful day.
Plus, he enjoys intentionally lagging a bit behind to enjoy the jiggle of her ass as she walks ahead of him.
Truly a win-win for all.
The minute she steps foot onto the sand, enters onto the actual beach, there’s a bit of a shift. Nothing negative. The complete opposite. Roman can sense her emotion growing, the reality of finally being in her mom’s home country truly settling in. 
He’s partially surprised by just how quickly she moves to the actual water, standing in the space where sand and ocean meet.
“My mom was right….” His gaze falls on her. “It’s so beautiful.” She steps forward a bit more, wind pushing the water closer as it grazes her feet. “I want to go in.” Another slight surprise, but not entirely. A part of the reason he’s been having her get in the pool was for this very moment, to lessen and minimize her fear so she could truly embrace this experience for all it can offer.
He nods but gestures to the camera bag. “Pictures first.”
She scowls a bit, and he chuckles, pulling the camera out. “Roman…”
“Non-negotiable, baby.” And she knows this, knows he’s not letting up when it comes to building her self-esteem and demolishing her body insecurity.
“Okay….” It feels a bit strange at first, posing as Roman snaps photos of her. She’s more than certain the first set of photos look just as awkward as she feels. But as time passes and with his encouragement and slight guidance, the awkwardness melts into something similar to relaxation. Her smile is a natural thing vs the result of being told to smile. 
And even when he tells her to remove the cover up, there’s some level of apprehension about being photographed in her bathing suit, but there’s also a level of confidence and reassurance that it’s literally just the two of them.
Roman has her damn near posing like it’s a real photoshoot, and when all is said and done, she’s tugging on his arm as he puts the camera away. “Come with me.”
Solana is both surprised and thankful when he doesn’t push back on her request, doesn’t deny it. There’s an obvious level of disinterest, but it’s nothing compared to his desire to make her happy. 
And in the beautiful ocean water that brushes past in little ripples and slight waves against her shoulder, holding onto her strong, handsome husband who seems to look at her like she set all the stars in the sky, she feels just that:
Happy
________
Solana is unsure just how long they spend at the beach. Long enough that by the time they return to the house, the chef he hired for them, an older, kind woman named Maria, has dinner just about ready to serve. And it’s exactly when they finish showering and cleaning up, the plate of delicious food is laid on the table, ready to devour.
It’s a bit of a different yet pleasant experience being able to have dinner with her husband. More often than not, he has to take it in his office due to his volume of work. So having him across from her, being able to talk with him while they indulge in Pozole is a kind of happiness she could get used to. 
But, it’s later that evening when they lay in the bed, Solana’s body sprawled on top of his much bigger one, Roman’s hand under her pajama shirt rubbing her skin, that something comes over her. A desire to unload something that’s been oscillating in the back of her head, no matter how many times she tries to push it away.
“I feel bad.” 
He doesn’t look down, just asks her calmly, “about?”
Solana licks her lips. “I didn’t mean to hurt him that badly.”
Roman had a feeling that’s what she was referring to, but he didn’t want it to be true. “Solana—”
“I know. I know I defended myself, but….” She tries to word it as best she can, though she also knows there’s little to no way Roman will abandon his ardent belief that Wes got exactly what he deserved. “I keep thinking about my mom and how….she always reminded me that at the end of the day, Wes is my brother, and a lot of his behavior was because of my dad.”
Roman does his best to keep his voice leveled, to keep out the unsettled anger he holds and will always hold against her piece of shit sibling. He doesn’t want her to think any level of that anger is directed toward her. “You were kids then, Solana. Sure, Xavier probably said and influenced a lot of things, but your brother isn’t a child anymore. He’s a grown man. There’s no excuse for the things he’s said and done to you.”
None whatso–fucking—ever.
And Solana knows that, hence her expressing agreement. “I know you’re right.” Her voice drops a bit, paving way for more vulnerability. “I just….I was so angry that night, and…and I’m not an angry person. I—I don’t like that.” Before he can continue his work to take away her unrequited feelings, she asks almost over a whisper, “what does it feel like to kill someone?”
Her question takes him back a bit, but he knows why she’s asking, where it’s coming from.
“Solana—”
She sits up, looking down at him, eyes watering. “If he dies….”
He brings his hand to her cheek, comforting her, “he won’t. That bastard isn’t allowed to die. Not unless it’s by my hand.”
Roman has ensured Wes has the best medical care money can provide solely for the fact that while his beating was well-deserved, it’s paltry compared to all of the ways Roman wants to make that bastard suffer before he encounters the fiery gates of hell. 
Xavier as well.
She shakes her head, sniffling, “I don’t—I can’t live with knowing I took someone’s life. I—” Her voice cracks. “I just can’t.”
“You won’t,” he vows. Anyone who would ever need to cease to exist because they’ve wronged her in some way, he would handle. He will handle. Because he agrees. Solana is a pure soul. Despite all of the evil surrounding and done to her, she’s retained her kind heart and gentle spirit. Killing someone, taking another life, destroys that, forever pollutes the soul in a way that’s irreversible. 
Roman would die before he let that happen to her.
But the topic of this conversation, it brings something else up for Solana. Something that literally shatters her spirit to think about, let alone verbalize aloud. But, she has to tell him, can’t keep it to herself any longer. It’s not fair to him with how good he’s been to her. 
She loves him too much to continue to lie to him.
“Roman…” Her throat suddenly feels so dry, stomach weighed down by a slate of concrete. “There’s something I—”
“Shhhh.” He sits up, bringing his other hand to her cheek, fully cupping her face. “Tomorrow is your birthday, Solana. You don’t need to be this upset.” He again brushes away her tears, gently adding, “I don’t like seeing you upset.”
Her eyes shut. He has no idea the increased emotion is for an entirely different reason. “But—”
Roman seems keen on not allowing the conversation to continue, solely because he dislikes how troubled she’s getting. Sees it as unfair. “It’s gonna be fine.” He then asks, “you trust me, don’t you?” She nods softly. That’s given at this point. There’s no one she trusts more than Roman Reigns. “Then trust I’ve got this.”
Her eyes shut, as she tries to listen and marinate on his words. Her husband is adept at remaining calm and being prepared for any and everything. She…she has to trust that for right now. Trust him. 
Has to table this conversation. For now.
Roman guides her to lay back down on his chest, Solana snuggling against him. “I’ve got you, Sol.” Her heart nearly bursts at that, at the nickname she hasn’t been called in years. The name her mother often referred to her as. Her eyes shut, stomach settling, emotions subsiding in the way only Roman seems capable of orchestrating. “Always.”
________
The first thing Solana notices when she wakes up the next morning is the noticeable empty space besides her. The space where Roman should be sleeping, his muscular arm around her body, holding her against him. 
Instead, she awakes on her back, alone, with no Roman in sight.
She frowns for a few seconds, sitting up in the bed and rubbing her eyes. The sadness shifts away just as soon as it appeared. Solana knows he must either be in the gym or doing something for work. There’s very little concern that he’s ventured far.
It’s why she grabs her phone off the nightstand only to find a plethora of birthday texts and an attached photo of Dulce in the group chat with her, Naomi, Bayley, Jimmy, and Jey.
Bayley: Happy birthday, friend! Roman’s ass better be treating you like the queen you are! 💙 Love you so much and can’t wait until you get back so we can fuck up some more trucks together! 😜
Naomi: What Bayley said! Happy freaking birthday, Solana! Even if you wanted to, you ain’t getting rid of us. Sisters for life! 💚
Jey: Happy birthday, lil sis! Make sure you take lots of pics of Free Willy over there!
Jimmy: Man, you dumb asf. They supposed to look at dolphins! Not sharks! Free Willy was a shark!
Jimmy: Happy birthday, sis!
Naomi: Solana, you can feel absolutely feel free to mute this chat until you return. 😐
Bayley: Or forever.
There’s a myriad of emotions coursing through her. So much happiness. Bayley. Naomi. Jimmy. Jey. A family. They’ve become her family. 
It brings tears to her eyes and keeps her in bed a couple minutes longer as she basks in the kind words and love.
It also keys her into just what Roman has planned for her big day. That brings on an additional layer of emotionality. He’s so so good to her.
Solana: Thank you, guys. You all have no idea what you mean to me. 🥺♥️
Placing her phone on the nightstand, she finally climbs out of bed and into the bathroom to pee, brush her teeth, and wash her face. She decides against placing the robe over her pajamas. An unnecessary thing considering Roman’s seen just about all of her at this point.
It'll make telling or asking him the realization she’s come to just a tad bit easier.
Out the bathroom and down the steps, sure enough, she finds him, burly body plopped down on one of the chairs in the kitchen, Maria working away to prepare what’s probably a more than necessary, grand breakfast.
Roman’s hearing and peripheral vision is expert level, because she’s barely in the kitchen when he lifts his gaze from the open laptop in front of him and sets his sights on her. One finger beckons her in his direction. An unnecessary thing considering that’s exactly where she was already headed.
Solana is easily guided onto his lap, Roman taking index finger under her chin for a kiss that’s so soft compared to his typically rough demeanor. She smiles. “Good morning….”
He chuckles. “Morning.” His hand moves to her cheek, “happy birthday.”
Heart filled, she lays her head against his shoulder, intentionally not looking at the computer in the event it’s private but still asks. “What are you doing?”
He instead motions for her to do just that. “Look.”
She does, and instantly she’s burying her face back into him. “Roman, I hate looking at pictures of myself.” Because that’s what’s on his screen, one of the photos he took of them at the beach yesterday. 
“Too bad, cause that might be one of my new favorite things.” She smiles yet again, a given whenever she’s around him. Solana also finds herself forcing her attention back to the screen, reaching to click through the photos, most of her, which is uncomfortable but still bearable. However, her attention is mostly drawn to the ones not of her, of the beach and nature and scenery that he took. 
“These are so good.” She finds herself complimenting him, because it’s true. Added to the long list of things Roman is exceptionally good at is photography. She teases him a little. “You should photograph more.”
He scoffs, an almost bitter tone to his voice. Not directed at her, of course. “When?”
She shrugs. “I—I don’t know, but we can figure it out. If…if you like to do it, then you should do it.” And just like that, she’s determined to help him figure out just that. It’s the least she can do for him.
Truly.
Noticing Maria multitasking, Solana calls out and asks, “Maria, do you need any help?”
The older woman gasps dramatically and waves away the offer as if it was an insult. “Nonsense, child. It is your birthday. You must rest and let that handsome husband of yours treat you.”
Solana laughs a bit. 
Roman asks, “what did she say?”
“I asked her if she needs any help, and she basically told me I don’t get to do any of that cause it’s my birthday.”
“Damn straight,’ Solana giggles as he moves his hand to her hip. “We’ll leave after breakfast.”
Being honest, she dances her fingers up his arm, teasing almost, “I know where we’re going….” 
Roman gives her one of those infamous smirks which quickly drops when he realizes something. “Which one was it? Dumb or Dumber?”
Giggling, she hands him her phone, opening the group chat and showing him the messages.
His eyes rake over the words, and Solana has to bite back her laugh at the absolute irritated expression painted on his handsome face when he’s done. “Even hundred fucking miles away, they ruin shit.”
She kisses his cheek, wanting to calm him down. “It’s okay.” Solana suddenly asks. “Are you gonna do it with me?”
He gives her a look. “That’s for you, Sol. Not me.”
She pouts a little, gently reminding him, “but…it can be for the both of us.”
“Swimming with Dolphins screams you. Not me.” He adds on with an almost scowl and shake of his head. “I’m too old for that shit.” Curious, he switches the topic a bit, asking, “does our age difference bother you?”
“I never really thought of it,” she answers, honestly. Roman being older than her truly has never been anything she’s considered to be an issue. At the beginning of this whole arrangement, she had a slate of other much more relevant reasons to be cautious and wary. All of those reasons almost making her laugh a bit because they’re so far away from the truth. “So, no.” She shrugs, adding. “I—I never really had good luck with guys my age anyway.” Or, at all, really. “Besides….” She chews on her bottom lip, coyly starting off a leading sentence, “there’s nothing about you that bothers me….except—”
Roman is every bit as eager as he looks for the rest. “Except?”
She bats her eyelashes, almost intentionally trying to butter him up. “If you could be a little nicer to your cousins….”
“Baby, how many times do we have to have this conversation?” He once again reiterates what, in his mind, should be painfully obvious. “I’m not a nice person.”
“But you are,” she stresses, fingers moving through his beard. “You are to me.”
“It’s different with you, Solana.” He’s not necessarily in the space to explain just how it’s different, but it is. She’s in a category all on her own. “Look….do my cousins piss me off at least 8 times a day? Yes. Do I have thoughts of homicide regarding them at least once a day? Sure. But….” He blows out a breath. “We’ve been friends since we were little kids. They’re family. I would die for them just as quickly as I know they would die for me.”
While she understands his point and is grateful for his level of openness and vulnerability, Roman and death in the same sentence brings out an almost physical reaction on her part.
That’s not even something she can tolerate thinking about.
She would lose her fucking mind if something were to ever happen to him. 
Solana is desperate to change the subject, needing something, literally anything, other than Roman dying to think about. “I….I know what I want you to give me for my birthday.”
His brow lifts as he asks with a bit of attitude. “You planning on telling me, considering it’s here?”
She smiles softly, finger trailing down his face. “Later….” Solana climbs off his lap, rubbing her stomach. “Right now, I just want to eat breakfast with my husband.”
________
It’s called Dolphin Discovery. The activity Roman has planned for the morning of her birthday, and it consists of exactly what the title implies as well as what Jimmy and Jey unintentionally spoiled for her.
Not that that’s a big deal, per se.
It doesn’t dim her excitement. The way her smile is painted on her face at the private event Roman arranged for just them, the only other people are the staff and instructors who guide the event. 
Solana is even able to convince Roman to join her for a short period of time in the water, granted he looks irritated and uninterested the entire time. Still, she knows his focus and priority is just making sure she has a nice time.
And she does. 
It’s full of smiles and laughter. 
Just as the rest of the day as Solana asks to go to the beach after, fully enamored with the crystal clear water and beauty that is the island of las mujeres. Of course, this comes with the almost stipulation from Roman that he has to photograph her again.
She’s less uncomfortable this time around, posing for his photos without as much reservation. The decreased inhibitions largely due to her overall happiness. Solana hasn’t felt so great, so in love with life for a very long time.
If ever. 
But, she’s even more touched when Roman guides them back to the beach later that evening what’s a private dinner for just the two of them.
“Roman….” She can’t help to take in the beautiful set up as he pulls out the seat for her. “This is so beautiful….”
He takes her in as he sits opposite of her, the way her dress hugs her so beautifully, the soft set of her eyes as she continues to marvel, smiling so genuinely at the setup. “Very…”
She brings her attention back onto him, reminding, “Roman, you really….you really didn’t have to do all of this. I would have been just as happy back home with you.”
“That’s too boring.” He dismisses, reaching across the table for her hand. “Too close to people. I wanted you to myself.”
She smiles, teasing him a bit. “Is that why it’s just been mostly you and me so far?”
“Damn straight.” 
She giggles, head tilted as she turns his hand over, tracing the lines of his palm. “Me haces muy feliz….”
His eyes squint with intrigue. “You’re really going to make me learn Spanish, aren’t you?”
“No,” she answers softly, focused on her gesture with his hand. “I’m…I’m not saying anything you don’t already know.”
“Which is?” 
Her eyes lift to his, locking intensely. “How much I care about you.” 
How much I love you.
That part…..that he doesn’t know. Or maybe he does. Solana knows she wears her heart on her sleeve to a certain extent. Knows how perceptive her husband is. But, if he has noticed, he hasn’t said anything. And she’s partially grateful for that, because acknowledging her love for him, internally anyway, is something that she’s okay with. Something she doesn’t really question.
She can’t say the same for him.
Love and Roman have a complicated history she can’t even begin to truly understand. It may not be something he feels capable of anymore, not after the kind of loss he experienced. And she can understand that. She’s okay with that. Because the way he treats her, the way he makes her feel, the happiness he brings her….it’s more than enough.
It’s all she needs.
The dinner itself is just as wonderful as any other meal they’ve had the past two days, but what Solana mostly enjoys is the conversation. Being able to talk to and with Roman has easily become one of her favorite things. Their conversation never goes stale, and even when she worries she’s annoying him, he keeps it going.
He truly is becoming one of her best friends. Not in the same way Naomi and Bayley have. Something different, something deeper almost. Still as appreciated. 
And it’s when the dinner comes to a close, Solana is once again taken back by Roman’s nearly limitless generosity when he gifts her a set of bracelets, Louis Vuitton, Cartier, and other luxury brands she’s certain the combination of cost equalling what some people pay for homes let alone jewelry. 
The depth of his kindness toward her will never cease to amaze her.
Back at the house, she has a bit of a hard time getting him to use the shower in the master bedroom vs using the one down the hall. She comes up with a weak excuse regarding shower design preference, and while she’s certain he doesn’t believe her one bit, he lets it go.
And Solana is utterly grateful, because she needs to be completely separated in order to prepare for the thing she’s wanted and thought about since last night, since she decided it’s truly what she wants.
Everything he’s done thus far has been more than thoughtful, but this….this is something on an entirely different level. 
She’s just stepped out the shower and wrapped the towel around her body when a random thought about what tonight could and most likely will entail flashes in her mind. 
Solana closes her eyes and tries to ignore the aching between her legs, even if she knows it’s a fruitless effort. 
Roman has been an absolute saint, patient beyond belief with her and this gradual process of working up to being intimate. Always checking in with her every step of the way.
But…..but lately, she finds herself….thinking about him in….different ways. Wondering what it would be like to finally go all the way. To be with him fully in that way.
Ways she previously couldn’t allow herself to think about. Too hindered by the memories of her trauma. 
Yet with him, it’s something unlike what she’s used to. Her chest doesn’t feel like it’s about to explode, and she doesn’t find herself panicking, needing to push him away from her, to not have any hands on her because they all feel the same, the same as her rapists.
With Roman…..that’s not her story. It’s just him she sees, feels, wants.
By the time she’s done with her shower, Solana has to reach across the bathroom counter to wipe her hand across the fogged mirror. She hits the switch for the vent and digs through her toiletries bag for the essentials and gets into her routine, focusing way too much on what she’s doing to avoid the thought sitting impatiently in the back of her head.
But, it’s when she’s reached the end of her routine and goes to grab her bra and panties she had sitting on the counter, that she pauses.
Scared.
Solana realizes that’s one of the dominant emotions she’s struggling with. She’s scared to go for what she wants. It’s a tale as old as time. Fear is always the thing that holds us back the most, that keeps us from reaching goals, attaining desires, being freed.
For so long, she believed that she was damaged. That the trauma of her past made it impossible for her to ever have a healthy sexual relationship with another person. But Roman has changed that. He’s changed her life in so many ways, and now, she is presented with the chance and opportunity to take back her power, to reclaim her sexuality.  
And now….she’s ready to do just that. 
Solana slowly retracts her hand and instead slides her pink, silk gown over her head, ignoring the almost strange feeling of having nothing underneath her dress. Solana keeps staring at her reflection, mentally going over everything: floss, mouthwash, deodorant, lotion, perfume on all of her pulse points. 
When she realizes that she’s only stalling, she forces herself to leave the bathroom. Solana makes her way down the hall and into the master. She’s relieved to see he’s still in the bathroom and decides to sit and wait on the edge of the bed. Similar to how her nerves are on edge. In the bathroom, the pep talk was more motivating and inspiring. Now, in this space, her anxiety is doing those damn flips again. 
“Solana?” Her head lifts and she stands up. Roman is standing near the bathroom door, shirtless, gray sweats hanging dangerously low, his hair down. Solana watches his gaze darken, slowly taking in her immodest state, focusing on the clear outline of her nipples pressing against the thin material. “What are you—”
She says nothing and instead grabs his hand, leading him to the bed. She switches their positions and guides him to sit on the end of the bed as she straddles him, her legs on either side of him. Solana refuses to think about the possible exposure from this position and instead focuses on him.
“I want you,” is all she says, quiet but sure. “I want you for my birthday.”
His face reads a mixture of emotions, primarily confusion. 
And lust.
“Solana….” He seems to want to move his hands to her waist but hesitates. “I didn’t….that’s not why I brought you here. I would never pressure you—”
“I know,” she interrupts, softly. “You’ve always let me set the pace, so….so let me set it now.” She brings her hands to his face, looking him dead in the eye as she repeats, “What I want for my birthday….is you.” A fleeting thought creeps across her mind when she adds, “unless….unless you don’t want me th—”
Roman switches their positions so quickly that she can barely process what’s happening until she’s flat on her back with him hovering above her. His eyes are fluttering as he works to settle himself, breathing out, “I’ve always wanted you, baby. Just needed you to tell me when.”
She licks her lips and lightly glides her fingers over his abs. He’s so firm. “And now?”
“Now?” Roman moves his hand to her knees, slowly prying them apart. She breathes in as he starts to move his fingers up the inside of her legs. “After tonight, ain’t nobody else gon’ have you like this,” his thumb brushes over her inner thigh and she grabs his bicep. “Feel you like this,” Solana’s head goes back into the bed when he glosses his fingers over her apex. “Or taste you like this but me.” Their gazes lock. “Understood? You’re mine.”
His tone is commanding and authoritative. She can mumble a quiet ‘yes’ in agreement when his head drops between the crook of her neck, his hair fanning her face, pulling his hand from between her legs. “Promise me you’ll tell me if we need to stop.” 
She gently caresses the back of his neck, reassuring him. “Roman, I’m fin—”
“Solana,” he interrupts. There’s no denying or questioning of the seriousness in his tone of voice. “Promise me.”
She nods and rakes her fingers over his scalp. “I promise.”
Roman is visibly pleased by this, eyes raking over her body. “Good.” He lowers his lips to hers, hands moving to explore her body. “So fucking pretty….”
The light kiss easily progresses into something more intense, something deeper, something that has her feeling so flustered and warm all over. His pants are quickly discarded, leaving him in boxers only. Roman continues to massage and knead her breast, along with the palming of her ass yet still makes active efforts to receive consent, always checking her comfort levels.
Initiating this is major.
Her lips are nice and swollen when he starts kissing around her face before grabbing her hand and turning it over. Two long fingers press against her wrist. 
He doesn’t say anything for a good minute, prompting her to ask, “what are you—”
“Do you trust me?” 
There’s not a second of hesitation or delay. “Of course.” 
“I need to relax you more.” With his free hand, his thumb flicks over her nipple as he explains, just as tender as every other thing he’s done to maintain her comfort. “You’re still tensing a bit under me, and the more tense you are, the more it’s going to hurt, and I don’t want to hurt you…”
Swallowing, she replies back in the same soft tone. “You could never hurt me, Roman.” His eyes flash with something almost soft. Like affection. Like something deeper. “But…I understand. What…what do you want me to do?”
“I don’t want you to do anything. Tonight is about you.” Her eyes flutter shut as he brings his mouth back to her neck, speaking against her soft skin. “Just want you to let me take care of you…” And it’s as he continues to travel down her body, tugging at her dress as much as he can to press a trail of kisses between the valley of her breast, and halting near her covered belly button that she understands what he’s asking her.
And suddenly her cheeks are on fire. Solana isn’t entirely naive. She knows that plenty of people engage in oral sex, but she’s also heard a lot of men prefer not to. Prefer to receive rather than give. “I…..you….you don’t have to—”
“Solana, I’ve wanted to taste you since the first day I met you.” His words, dark and dripping with need make her bite down on her bottom lip as his finger trails along her inner thigh. “Will you let me?”
She’s insecure and a shade of unsure for reasons entirely unrelated to her trauma. Maybe there’s some influence there, but it’s primarily the intimacy of it all. But, she then realizes he’s eventually going to be inside of her before the night ends, so his mouth being on her most intimate area….isn’t really a major difference.
Swallowing, she answers, voice catching for a second with a need she didn’t recognize until this moment. “Y–yes.”
His eyes light with desire, but he doesn’t miss a beat in reminding her yet again that she’s fully in control tonight. “Tell me to stop and we stop. I don’t care what’s happening. All I care about is you. Alright?” 
Solana nods. “O–okay.”
Roman kisses her stomach and wastes no time in helping her remove her dress, leaving her fully exposed to him, physically and emotionally. Slowly, he pries her thighs apart, seeing how she bites on her bottom lip when he teases a finger against her. 
“Still so sensitive…..” There’s a level of intrigue there, Solana watching Roman push his hair back, his tongue exiting his mouth and wetting his lips. “You’ll get used to me.”
She’s not sure she could ever get used to a man like Roman, and the minute his tongue flattens against her there, she’s almost certain she’ll never get used to that.
“Oh my god.”
He looks up at her, Solana suppressing a moan at the sight of his big body between the space of her thighs, mouth curved into a wry smile. “I barely touched you, baby….”
That doesn’t stop the fire coursing through her body.
“You want me to stop?” A frantic shaking of her head to signify a hell no is all he needs. He’ll settle for no verbal acknowledgement this time. “Good.” Salona gasps as he hooks the back of her knees over his big shoulders. “Now lay back and let me take care of you...”
It seems like all Roman has done is take care of her, but this is a new level of care, one that has her scratching and gripping helplessly at the sheets as he licks at her one, two, three times before his tongue darts around and plays with her in a way that makes her stomach tangled and twisted.
Solana whimpers when he starts sucking on her clit. “Fuck being inside you, just let me stay with this sweet pussy in my mouth.”
For a second, she considers it, because the way he laps and sucks on her has her brain practically fried trying to comprehend how just his tongue alone can have her nearly worming off the bed.
His big, strong hands grip her thighs, holding her in place as he never once lifts his head for air.
“Roman…..”
“You taste better than I imagined.” She swears she feels him kiss her slick folds. “Gonna have you sit on my face the next time….”
The terror at that thought is short lived and stomped upon by his hands traveling up her body, gripping her breast, squeezing just enough to make her moan yet again, head pressed back into the pillow. 
His name slips out her mouth for what feels like the 20th time as she moves her hands on top of his, stomach arching, pussy pressing further against his mouth. He makes a sound down there, but sound isn’t the focus when all of her most sensitive nerve endings are being so beautifully catered to.
But then it becomes too much, Roman switching to a lethal combination that includes sucking on her clit while two fingers enter inside her. It has her nearly jumping off the bed, unintentionally inching away from him.
Roman hums against her lifting up only to warn, “stop running from me, baby.” He’s playing with the mess she’s made, essence practically dripping from his beard. “This pussy is too good to not indulge myself.”
And before she can protest, can try to find some words to string together, he’s back in between her legs, and Solana finds her hands moving to the top of his hand. She can’t tell if she wants to just shove him away or shove him closer. 
A strange yet wonderful dichotomy. 
There’s no telling how long he’s down there, feasting so eagerly on her like he’s been waiting on this. Like, he’s been yearning for this. The same way Solana is starting to realize she too unintentionally wanted this. Wanted to know what it could and does feel like to be intimate, to have those normal, sexual needs met. It was just all hidden and obscured behind a dense wall of trauma the same man bringing her to heaven has helped her dismantle. 
She owes him so much.
Especially for the way he gives her an orgasm that has her wanting to scream his name loud enough for anyone within 100 miles to hear. That just might have been the case too if she didn’t press her lips together as she rode out her orgasm, Roman still remaining between her thighs as he helps her through it, letting her ride out her pleasure still against his greedy mouth.
He seems so hungry for her. 
When he finally makes his way up, presses his lips against her, Solana moans at the taste of herself on his mouth. He smirks against her lips.
“I told you I’m good at a lot of things..”
She smiles, her eyes blinking. “Roman, I—I’m ready.”
He doesn’t look surprised, but he does look hesitant. “Solana….”
“This is what I want. I—I want to be with you….fully.” Even as the words leave her mouth, the aftershock of her orgasm still trying to subside, she’s nervous. She’s nervous because there will always be that small voice in the back of her head telling her she shouldn't, that she can’t, that sex has been forever ruined for her. 
But, it’s almost as if just looking at Roman, at feeling his desire and care for her, it snuffs those voices out, locks them in a closet with a key that he’ll make sure is never found. “I—I want you inside me.”
And there’s something either about that or the way she words it that seems to trigger the okay switch for him. He gently traces the outline of her lips. “We’ll take it slow.” 
She nods as he brings his fingers to her wrist again. Her pulse. She realizes he’s checking for her pulse, trying to gauge her heart rate, assessing for any spiked anxiety. 
“You’re relaxed, but…it still might hurt at first.”
“I know,” she murmurs, heat rising to her cheeks as she explains so simply yet accurately. “It’s…it’s because you’re big.”
Roman smiles, and that alone chips away a chunk of her anxiety. His smile is so beautiful.
It’s not missed upon her, however, that he doesn’t deny it. Not that he can. She’s heard enough, felt enough, even seen enough to some extent to know that he is very much an overall big man. And yet there’s not a damn thing about him that she finds intimidating, that she’s scared of.
His strength doesn’t scare her. Not anymore.
Just makes her feel safe. 
Solana feels him shift atop her, but she doesn’t remove her gaze from the vaulted ceiling above them. He’s most likely removing his boxers, the only piece of clothing separating that part of him from that part of her. 
She tries to lower her eyes down between their heated bodies, partially wanting to see him for herself, to see what’s about to enter her when Roman brings his hand under her chin, forcing her gaze back onto him. “It’s just you and me….okay?”
Her eyes flutter closed for a second as she nods, opening and breathing back, “you and me…”
Roman lowers his mouth back onto hers, taking her for a slow sensual kiss that’s timed perfectly with the exact moment the thick tip of his dick gradually descends into her tight, wet opening. Solana gasps into his mouth, taken back by the stretch of him, a slight burning sensation that’s eased by the way he kisses her jawline, asking if she wants him to stop.
The answer is easy. 
“N–no. I’m fine.” She murmurs, grabbing him by his face and kissing him again, utilizing the talent of his mouth on hers to blur away the borderline discomfort of his initial entry. Roman is certainly well endowed and an initial level of pain is to be expected, both from his size and her experience. But, she needs his kisses to keep her from gravitating to that other painful experience, to keep her from getting triggered.
And something tells her that he knows as much without her needing to say anything. He’s consistent and dedicated in keeping his mouth on hers, his tongue raking across her bottom lip before he enters in yet another part of her. She does her best to keep up with him, to match his passion, but deep pants often break their rhythm as he continues to sink into her. He feels so deep, and he’s not even all the way in.
And when she’s moaning and groaning at the newfound stretch of him, his voice is in her ear apologizing, asking again if she wants him to stop. The answer is the same as before. Just worded differently.
“I want all of you.” 
The good. The bad. It doesn’t matter. She just wants him.
Roman is the one to groan this time, resting his forehead against hers, “fuck, you’re so tight.”
Once finally and fully seated in her, Solana is grateful that he gives her a second to breathe, to adjust to this new sensation. Still uncomfortable, the fullness in such a sensitive area, but also comforted by Roman, by his constant attempts to assess her comfort levels. It’s why after a few minutes she glides her hands up his arms and encourages him to continue. “M–move.”
He’s studying her, like he’s done at every point throughout this process. “Are you sure?”
She nods and quickly remembers his one rule. “Yes.”
Though her eyes are closed, Solana can feel Roman’s gaze burning into her as he shifts his hips, the thickness of him slowly sliding out of her, lessening that fullness only to slowly re-enter, bringing it right back. He keeps this pace, slow and gradual, working her as gently as he can, never not watching for any sign of distress. 
And it’s at some point that burning sensation washes away into something unfamiliar but desirable. It morphs into a form of pleasure that has her head slipping back against the pillow, her stomach starting to cave under his expert thrusts. His name falls out her mouth in the form of a breathy moan. “Roman….”
“Does that feel good?” She cries out as he kisses her shoulder, hand kneading her breast. “Tell me what feels good.”
The answer is easy, “everything.” And she means it, there’s not a trace of pain she can identify as she moves her hands up his muscular back as he switches up his pace, quicker but deeper thrusts that have her nails digging into his taut skin. “Oh….”
His head drops down in the crook of his neck. “God, you feel fucking amazing.” His hands drop to her hips, pulling her up to meet him thrust for thrust. “Could stay inside of you like this for hours….”
Solana chews down on her bottom lip, back arching as he adjusts his hips, reaching her even deeper, hitting another sensitive spot that has her eyes watering. “Roman.”
“That’s it. Say my name, baby.” And she does, again and again, his name a song on her lips that’s sweet music he wants to keep on repeat for the rest of his life. “You don’t know what you do to me, Solana.”
Whatever it is can’t be as good as he’s making her feel. Solana could scream from the absolute rapture he’s bringing her body, elevating her to places unseen and almost too good to be real. 
“Te quiero mucho.”
He has no idea what she just said, but he has no doubt it’s an expression of bliss, and it only encourages him to dive deeper, to rut into her a little harder. Her pleasure is the roof, but that’s a limitation. He doesn’t do limitations.
He wants to never stop hearing his name leave her mouth, breathy and wanton. She’s a mess underneath him, wet ass pussy gushy, gripping the shit out of him like he’s never experienced. It actually takes a bit of effort on his his part to not come before she does, a arduous task considering she’s never looked more fucking beautiful being underneath him like this, every little facial expression making his dick pulse inside of her.
Roman has always heard people say sex is even better when it’s someone you actually care about. He never believed that shit. He never believed that shit until now. Because he’s never felt something, never felt someone, as good as what Solana feels right now.
If not for her trauma, wouldn’t nobody be getting any sleep tonight. He’d stay in this pussy, have it in his mouth, have it in any and all ways until the wee hours of the morning. Sleep be damned.
But, this isn’t about him. It’s about her. It’s all about her, and he’ll do whatever she wants, whatever she needs. Even if selfishly, he’s working to prolong her climax just as much for his pleasure as hers.
He doesn’t ever want to pull out.
And maybe it’s also the fact that he’s never been with anyone else raw. Never had that skin to skin experience, feeling slick pussy directly against his hardened dick.
Possibly.
Regardless, after tonight, if it’s not Solana, he doesn’t want it.
Her pussy is premier and just for him.
But, it’s when he takes a brief pause, to switch their positions, situating her on top of him, he sees the nervousness wreck her beautiful face.
“Roman. I—I don’t—I don’t know how–” And it’s as she protests, as she tries to explain to him she doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t know how to please him like that, Roman brings his hands to her hips, tugging her forward just enough for her mouth to drop open from the friction, from the way he presses into her, hitting yet another spot that has her eyes nearly watering all over again. “Oh my….”
His eyes are blazed with desire and yearning as he encourages her. “That’s it…..” Her eyes shut, the sound of him asking, “are you okay?” an almost distant thing, an almost inconceivable question. Everything about everything he’s done to and for her has felt more than okay. It’s felt heavenly. 
The same way her hands naturally plant against his chest, less of him directing her movements and more of her riding him from her own volition.
The tips given to her by Bayley and Naomi just weeks prior return to the forefront of her mind, and Solana finds herself moving her hips, grinding on top of him as if she was spelling her name. 
And almost instantly, Roman’s eyes are shutting too as he sings all of her praises, “fuck, just like that baby.”
She moves against him, riding him with a growing intensity that’s only matched by the level of desire on both of their ends. It feels fucking ethereal.
And when he can sense the pending fatigue in her body, Roman sits up, hands moving down her smooth back to her hips and guides her body against him, hitting her spot even deeper, Solana’s cries of pleasure a continuing symphony of bliss.
“You feel me, baby? Feel me in you like this?” Her head drops against his shoulder as she holds onto him, their bare, slick chests pressed against each other.
She whimpers against him, “god, yes.”
“I told you I would make you feel good, didn’t I, sweetheart?” She nods frantically only to cry out yet again when he glides his hand down and peppers his thumb over her swollen clit. “Gonna take care of you every single time. I don’t care how or where. You want it, imma give it to you.”
His voice takes on a darker tone, reminiscent of his reputation, a testament of the depth of his feelings for her. “I’ll kill anyone who tries to take you from me.” She gasps against him, yet another wave of pleasure shooting through her core. “Burn this whole fuckin’ world down….”
There’s something about his words, about his dedication to her, to keeping her safe. To keeping her with him. She lifts her head and brings her hands to his cheeks, making him lock gazes with her. “No one could ever take me from you.”
Roman just looks at her. 
Something happens. A shift. A move. A disturbance of some sort. It’s as if something snaps in half the minute his eyes lock onto hers. He doesn’t move, and neither does she. No one says anything. It almost feels like no one is breathing. Her gaze on him is just as his is on hers. Deep. There’s something happening at the soul level. A tying of some sort. A connection. 
A bond. 
Unbreakable. Unshakable.
Eternal. 
And it’s with an almost unheard non-existent level of vulnerability that Roman practically whispers against the slick skin of her shoulder, pressing a soft kiss. “I need you, Solana.” 
Her eyes water. The connection. The emotion. The love of it all. She doesn't know if he’s feeling the last one, but she certainly is, and it’s the best feeling in the world. “You’ll always have me.” She moans, whimpering as he starts moving her again, nudges that spot yet again. “Te amo con toda mi alma, Roman."
This man now has her: mind, body, and soul.
Her better half.
Her missing piece 
It aids in the build up, her fingers squeezing against his muscular shoulders. “I’m—I’m gonna—“
“I know,” his voice is strained, his body tensing up underneath her. Solana knows he’s not far behind. He quickly switches their positions, wanting her underneath him, spreading her thighs further to maximize the full pleasure of this final ride. 
Hand to his chin, she forces his gaze on her, reminding him with a hint of vulnerability. “You and me.” Her release is almost immediate, a fountain of tightness and pressure that’s both wonderful and all encompassing, forcing her to lay her head against his shoulder, holding onto him as she rides out her climax.
And it’s not even minutes later that his release finds him just as strong, just as heavy, just as fucking shattering.
Roman lets go, big body jerking above her as he releases inside of her, the mixture of their togetherness creating an absolute mess that coats almost all of their lower halves. But, she doesn’t care, just continues to hold onto him as he empties until there’s nothing left. 
Solana groans quietly as he pulls out of her, the absence of him creating a strange, unfamiliar void that’s moderately eased as he plops down on his back next to her, immediately pulling her onto his chest.
This settles her almost instantaneously. 
He kisses the top of her head, gently rubbing her back. “Did I—did I hurt you?”
She smiles against him. The answer to that question has and will always be the same. “No. Never.” Tears burning her eyes, she murmurs into his skin. “You set me free.”
Because, he did. Because after tonight, there’s no turning back. There’s no block or wall of trauma that can stop her from experiencing this. From truly being able to say that while her assault fractured her, it damn sure didn’t break her. 
Roman’s deep voice above her offers a low, gentle rebuttal. “You did that, Sol.” And as if emotions weren’t high enough as it is, he has to send her nearly overboard with his next simple but powerful statement. “you said yes.”
Eyes closing, she has to sit on it, has to rest in it, has to feel it. With all the emotion, she reaffirms it, reclaims her voice, her autonomy, yet another piece of her life. “I said yes…..”
----------
translations:
“Te quiero mucho.” = "I love you so much."
"Lo’u Au" = Someone who is your absolute favorite
"Me haces muy feliz" = "You make me very happy."
"Te amo con toda mi alma, Roman" = "I love you with all my soul, Roman."
"Yo siento muy bien contigo" = "I feel happy with you."
244 notes · View notes
luciferlightbringer · 7 months
Text
Love in a Hopeless Place
Chapter 10
Tumblr media
Chapter 9|Chapter 10|Chapter 11|Updated through Chapter 12
Lucifer x prostitute fem!reader Word Count: 3.6k CW: Slowburn, Angst, Prostitution, Hurt/comfort, trauma, fluff, depression, anxiety, insecurity,
Over the next couple of days, Charlie and the hotel crew started to prepare for their little "intervention" dinner with her dad. Charlie and Vaggie worked together to make up dinner while the others made sure the place was kept up, mostly Niffty.
Later that night, Charlie heard a knock on the front door. Was that him? Why didn't he just teleport in like usual? Charlie went to open the door and saw Lucifer giving his big focused smile.
"Charlie! It's so good to see you," he said enveloping his daughter in a big hug. It had been weeks since he had hugged anyone, the sting of how much he missed it had started to grow back.
"Hi Dad," Charlie said hugging her father back tightly and swinging him around. "I've missed you so much, it's been weird not having you around as much."
Lucifer tightened his grip on Charlie as they hugged, "I'm- sorry about that sweetie, I just... got busy. I'll try to be better about that, I promise."
Charlie loosened the hug enough to study her dad's face, it was tired and worn out, he looked like he hadn't slept in days. Lucifer tried hard to keep his facade up, but he knew his daughter was trying to read him.
"Dad... are you sure you are ok?" Charlie asked with concern.
"Yes. Why do you ask?" he said still trying to hold a smile, holding a silence but futile prayer that he could find a way to fool her into thinking he was ok.
The other members of the hotel, Angel, Husk, Niffty, Cherri, Vaggie, even Alastor started to walk in from the shadows of the hotel lobby.
"Cuz, with all due respect your highness," Husk chimed in "One, you are a bad liar, two, we actually do care about you," Husk looked over to Alastor out of the side on his eye, "well... most of us care about you, and three... we are also worried about (y/n)."
"Ya!" Angel added in, "You two were a couple of peas in a pod, she was even talkin' 'bout wantin' to move in here, den 'poof', ya both are nowhere ta be seen fa' weeks. What gives?! I thought we mattered to you guys!"
"Ya! I miss you and our girl, where is she?!" Cherri pipped in, "We loved watching you two hangin' out here togetha."
"She was a bad girl! But she was really nice! I liked when she would listen to me talk about my bugs fights!" Niffty added, holding up her knife.
Alastor sighed, "Honestly, I'm mostly here for the entertainment of your sorrow... but (y/n) was important to the growth of the hotel and it's community. Plus, she amuses me. I had grown unfortunately fond of her charms," Alastor said with a wicked smile, his comment made the room pause a moment, Lucifer glared at him.
"We miss both of you, sir, it's just not the same here without you. We just kinda feel like we've been left in the dark," Vaggie added, rubbing her arm.
Lucifer sighed, he didn't realize just how much you had meant to not just Charlie, but to the entire hotel. That you guys together had been. It was important for them to know the truth.
"Ok, ok... I'll tell you the truth... but it isn't going to be pretty," Lucifer said with shame painting his face. Lucifer went to go sit on the couch and the others came to sit around him and listen to the story. Lucifer gave an abbreviated story of the last several months of his time with you, truth that you were actually a prostitute he had hired, the story with how it all started with the conversation with Ozzie, the first appointment and the chaos and joy that cam from it, how you had helped him to connect with Charlie and the hotel again, how you supported either other through the stresses of the war with Heaven, how he protected you, how he realized he had fallen in love with you, and then the last night you were together, the blur and confusion of it all, and how finally you had banned him from being able to be scheduled with you again and how you had been told that the whole dynamic was just her acting like she cared about him. He didn't blame or try to paint you in a bad light, he was just defeated and sad.
During the story, the group went through a series of emotions, all of them now understanding why you had not able to talk about your relationship with him at all.
"Damn it! No wonder I liked her so much! She's in da same industry as me!" shouted Angel when the story was over, "She felt so kindred and I couldn't fuckin' see it. Oh, she is good."
"So... none of your relationship was real?" Charlie asked, sadly.
Lucifer shook his head, "No... no I don't think it was."
Husk shook his head, "You're wrong." Everyone looked at him. "Something here doesn't add up, Angel, Cherri, you remember our conversation with (y/n) the night before the war with heaven?" They nodded, Husk looked at Lucifer, "The only lie I have ever seen (y/n) tell you was that she was sad that night because of the war, which... she still was... but the reason she was sad before you came over to check on her was because she was sad that she could not be honest with us about your guy's relationship. We had asked her about what was up because you guys seemed more than friends, and she told us she could not talk about it. And she has tried to bluff some things about how she presents herself before when we first met her, probably all just to protect the secret you guys had. Trust me when I say, she was never fake with how much I saw she cared about you."
Lucifer shrugged, "It doesn't seem to matter though it though... in the end, she banned me."
"Why?" asked Angel, "Did she tell you? Did you ever hurt her?"
"No. Someone else at the place she works called me and told me, she was gone or... something. I don't know if I hurt her, never physically, but I was so drunk at the end of our last night together... I don't know what I did or why I got banned... and I'd never want to cross a boundary like that... she's had too many fucked up people in her life... I don't want to add to that club any more than I already had," he buried his face in his hands, "it sounds like keeping the secret was already a lot of weight on her, I didn't realize..."
"King, listen, I've been in the sex business for a long time, nothin' about this situation makes sense ta me, both from a sex worka' standpoint or from what I know about her. Did you pay her well?" Angel ask inquisitively.
Lucifer nodded, "Ya, I gave her big tips too, I wanted to to be happy and get what she needed."
"No good sex worka' in their right mind would full on ban you for one weird night, even if you did rough 'em up a bit. You told us there was some other client that had been roughin' her up a bit that you took care of. Tell me, did she ban him on the first night of havin' any issues with him?" Angel asked. Lucifer shook his head, starting to think about Angel's words.
"Right. So unless she was stupid, which I know she aint, she wouldn't've cut off probably the best paycheck in hell just because you had one sloppy drunk night where something may have gone weird. Also, on top a dat, sex worka's can be good actors and can pretend like they care. But they try not to get attached, and like Husker said earlier, she got attached, and boy it was obvious. That's probably a big reason why I didn't sus her out sooner. By da time we met her, nothin' about ya relationship was actin' anymore, on either side. Cuz you love 'er, dontcha?" Angel pointed while he leaned back on the couch.
Everyone looked at Lucifer, he nodded, "I do, I love her."
Angel nodded, "And you would do anythin' to make 'er happy, including keepin' yourself away from her if you thought it would make her happier, isn't dat right?"
Lucifer started to tear up, "Yes..." Charlie started to tear up and hugged her dad.
"Therefore... there is something fishy happenin' here, there must be some form of miscommunication, or... a third party that likes messin' with shit," Angel looked up at the ceiling thinking.
"How do you know all this?" asked Vaggie suspiciously. Angel looked over at Vaggie and have her a sly smile, "When you're life was spent in da Mafia and your afterlife was spent around shitty desperate sex worka's that are dying to get a taste of your success by any means necessary, you pick up on a few things, baby."
Charlie perked up, "You think someone at her work did this?"
Angel shrugged, "It's very possible, not 100%, but it's possible. Lucifer, did (y/n) ever talk about having any issues with other girls at her workplace?"
Lucifer thought a moment, "Hmm... she mentioned there being some annoying girls that she some sometimes needed to put in their place, but nothing this crazy hostile. But then again, she didn't like talking about the Lounge much, and I didn't like asking because I started to get more sad whenever I was reminded that I was just a client to her."
"The Lounge, like the Luxurious Lady's Lounge in the Entertainment district?" asked Angel.
"Ya... you know it?" asked Lucifer.
Angel smiled, "Know it? Ha! Sure do. I know exactly where it is too. May have even seen 'er once or twice without knowin' it"
Charlie smiled at her dad, "Dad, if we know where she is, we should just go and talk to her!"
Lucifer shook his head, "Oh. No, no, nonononono, Charlie... I can't do that."
"Why not? Dad, come on, we can try clearing all this up!" Charlie pleaded.
Lucifer sighed, "I just... until I know for sure that she didn't actually ban me, I won't want to risk that. It's just not a good idea... Plus, I don't want to attract more attention to her if she is having issues there," Lucifer hung his head.
Charlie thought for a minute, then a lightblub went off, Charlie got down to Lucifer's eye level, "Dad, she may have "banned" you for seeing her... but not me! I could go talk to her!"
"Charlie, hold on, dis is a bad idea," Angel piped up, everyone looked at him confused, "Rememba' what happened when you tried to talk to Val for me?" Charlie thought for a second remembering the disaster that was, feeling the guilt return at the memory. Angel smiled, "Obviously I need to go with you!" The room erupted into laughter, Angel almost had them for a second, even Lucifer managed to crack a smile in his down mood.
"You guys are really willing to do this for me?" he asked looking to Charlie and Angel.
Charlie looked at Angel and back to her dad, and grabbed Lucifer's hands, "Yes, for you... and for us."
Lucifer smiled, "Ok... but can we actually have dinner before you go? I was anticipating an actual dinner instead of an intervention, but I guess I should have expected both." The room filled with laughter again and the group set up for dinner before Charlie and Angel would head out to find the Lounge, and more importantly, you.
______________________________________________________________
Later that evening, you were hanging out in the lobby of the Lounge, the same way that you had the nights before Lucifer had started to take up more of your schedule. You were still getting clients, but it was back to the old torturous monotony as before, but it somehow felt worse now that you had gotten a taste of love... or what you thought had been love. Every client made you wish you were back in Lucifer's arms, wanting to explore Lucifer's body... not this shithole and all it's shitty clients.
You felt yourself grow more bitter as you saw Cynthhhhia grow back in popularity with the customers, it seemed her few days on the phones really scared her into staying in her lane, especially because Larry had apparently made her take all of the calls during those three days. Something did not sit right with you about her more recent success, but you didn't want to turn into another her. Plus, the happier she was, the more she left you alone. Guess there had to be a bright side, somewhere.
You were sitting on your favorite couch in a long, blue, shear, flowy robe, when you saw a tall pair of individuals walk into the lobby. But not just any two tall people, two that you recognized, Angel and Charlie. You eyes went wide, and you quickly slinked off to the dressing room to hide.
'What the hell? What are they doing there?!' you thought to yourself. You hoped they hadn't seen you, even though your time with Lucifer was up, you still wanted to keep his secret about the two of you.
Charlie and Angel walked up to the front counter where Larry was standing he did a double-take seeing both of them.
"Whoooaaa, Princess Morningstar! And the famous Angel Dust! What an honor to have you two in to join us this evening. Are we interested in having a little fun tonight? I am surprised, I didn't think one of Val's best boys would be needin' to pay for fun. Unless... you are looking for a change in employment?" He flashed a sharp smile.
Charlie piped up, "Hi! Uhh, Charlie is just fine. And no, neither of those things. We are here looking for one of your girls, (y/n)."
"Is she here tonight?" Angel added.
"Uhh... ya. What business do you have with her?" Larry asked, wondering how they knew her.
"She's a friend ah mine," Angel chimed in, "She's mean MIA for a few weeks and we have been worried about 'er, we were wantin' to check in on her. Charlie has gotten to know her a little too and wanted to come with."
"Can we pleaseee see her?" Charlie pleaded.
Larry thought for a moment, "I don't know, she is still on the clock for several more hours. I can't just let her off early." Charlie and Angel look at each other and nod, Charlie pulls out an bunch of cash, "Will this cover her for the rest of the night." Larry smiled as the amount of money in her hands, it was more than enough.
"I do believe that will work Ms. Mornin- uhh, Charlie," Larry said taking the cash, "Let me go get her." Charlie is glad that she learned that in some situations like this, money talked more than words or power. She came more prepared than she had with her conversation with Valentino over getting more of Angel's time.
Larry searched around before finding you in the dressing room, "Hey Babydoll, you've been bought out for the rest of the night by some friends of yours, Angel Dust and Charlie Morningstar. I didn't know you knew them." He said giving you a look.
They bought you out for the rest of the night? Did they come here specifically to find you? How did they know you were here? Did... did Lucifer tell them? You felt some fear and hope bloom in your chest.
"Oh, haha ya, you know me, I'm just not one to talk about my personal life at work," you gave Larry a big smile. He laughed, "Alright, keep your secrets, sounds like they wanted to talk to you about something, worried about you. Go show 'em a good time tonight, ok?" You nodded, and quickly switching out to a more solid less see-through robe, before walking out to the lobby.
Angel and Charlie saw you coming, Charlie ran to you but you stopped her short of you, "Not here, come with me," and you led your friends up to you apartment. Once you were inside you room and the door was locked, you said "Ok now you can hug me if you want to."
This time, both Charlie and Angel want to embrace you at the same time, starting to tear up a little.
"Oh my god, (y/n)! It's so good to see you! We were so worried about you!" Charlie asked.
"Ya! When you and Lucifer stopped showing up at the hotel to visit, we started worrying, babe," Angel added.
"Wait... hold up, Lucifer stopped showing up to the hotel? How did you know I was here?" you asked.
"We sat my Dad down and he finally broke and told us the truth about everything," Charlie said.
"Ya, he spilled da beans on your guy's relationship, you don't have to keep his secret from us anymore," Angel added.
Tears started to well up in your eyes, "I don't?!" The two nodded. You started to sob and hugged them back. "I- I'm so sorry, I- I didn't want to lie to anyone but he wanted to keep it discreet, which I understand, he is the King! And it was so confusing, and then, one night he got really drunk one night, and it worried me, he wasn't acting like himself, and told me he loved me, but, but I didn't know if I could believe him. And he was getting all touchy and doe eyed, and I didn't know what was really what he wanted because it was all so sudden. So I ran! I ran because I was so scared, and- and- and-" Charlie and Angel both hugged you and tried to shushed you through your crying.
"It's ok, no one is mad at you. That sounds like a hard position to be in, it sounds like there was a lot of confusion on both sides," Charlie said.
"Confusion?" you sniffled, "Is that why he hasn't called to schedule with me again?"
Charlie and Angel looked at each other then back to you, "You didn't ban him then?"
You blinked, "WHAT?! Why on earth would anyone think I blocked him?! No! I freaked out and went on a trip for a few days to clear my head. I came back and I was told that he said he would call to reschedule, and then he just never did! I thought he hated me!"
"No!" Charlie cried, "No, Oh my god, he is a total wreck without you! He misses you like crazy! He thinks he was put on your "No Kiss List" or something"
"We can't even say your name without him shuttin' down and lookin' like we killed his dog or somethin'," Angel added, Charlie gave him a look, "What?! It's true!"
You sat down on the couch and stared out for a minute, thinking, "Why didn't he come to ask me himself?"
Charlie shrugged, "He doesn't remember what happened that night, he is convinced that he hurt you terribly and that it's why you banned him. He didn't want to hurt you so he respected that wish. We tried to get him to come tonight but he was scared in case you really had banned him."
You thought for a few more moments, who could have caused this? Who would have done this to you both. Your eyes widened. No, could this have been... did Cynthhhhia do this? Would she have been the one to make the calls that day since that was her punishment. You were pretty sure, but you didn't want to act without proof. You clenched your fists, starting to fill with rage.
"Is he at the hotel?" They nodded. You thought again, "Can you take me to him?" They nodded again with more excitement.
"I have just one question for you, before we go," Charlie started, looking into your eyes, "Tell me truthfully, do you actually care about my dad, not just for an income, but as a person?"
You took Charlie's hands in your own, "Charlie, I really do... more than anything... in fact... I'm pretty sure I'm in love with him." Charlie and Angel squealed and jumped up and down.
"That's all I needed to hear, let's do this!" Charlie declared.
You took a few minutes to get dressed, and soon you were off to see Lucifer again. Cynthhhhia eyed you a little as you left, wondering what you were doing with the most famous porn star in the Pride Ring and the Princess of Hell. She rolled her eyes and went back to chatting it up with her next client out it the lobby, it was probably nothing of substance, and she already had big enough fish to fry to keep her focused on herself. Although, she did briefly amuse herself with the idea of seducing the Princess' father, oh how wonderful a dream that would be, but she knew better than to put more thought into that. Why would the King of Hell ever need a prostitute? She laughed to herself.
You, on the other hand, were so full of fear and excitement at the idea of seeing actually Lucifer again, it felt like a dream and you were scared to wake up. But if Charlie and Angel's reaction was any indication of anything, maybe Brooklyn had been right after all.
______________________________________________________________
Thank you for putting up with torment! I made sure to get through this one quickier so that there was a return of hope. Next chapter they will finally talk in out, and then... a certain someone may see justice 😈
As usual, leave a comment if you want added to the taglist so that you can get notifications when future chapters drop! xoxo, dany (OMG there are so many of you!😍 Please let me know if the tag isn't working for you) Taglist :(red names are not tagging for some reason 😢)
@froggybich @wonderlandangelsposts @glowinthedarkbones1150 @marydragneell @crescent-z @superdinosaurnacho @jam0001 @kyo-kyo1 @so-get-this-sammy @lilzebeth @kelppsstuff @loquacious-libra @pinkhoneydrop @luleck @writer-girl99 @lavenz @stormz369 @littleladydemon @soujiswife @melday0105 @luluxx118 @sseleniaa @futureittomainn @cktkat @zaneyyyy @uravitsy @liecoris @starlitvenus @hannahrose130 @elleofdragons @butch-medusae @concentratedconcrete @erosamasan @stranger-chan @aquaamethyst96 @lxkeee @holyspacething @hulyenl @leximus98 @lu-ferri12 @mixplara @katnisspeetaprim @rebecca-hvnstn @roboticsuccubus83 @nekemewlita @femboyfatalle @thelethex @cryptidghostgirl @snowlotr @bangchansdirty-slut @glowymxxn @mcueveryday @hotvillianapologist @oneiric-rotaerc @wolfdaddyalphasworld @sleepypottersworld @wisterialagoon @theredviolets @theperfectmangovoid @lemonmoonmochi
366 notes · View notes
Note
Can I request one for Jacaerys Velaryon where Rhaenyra betroths him to his twin sister and they're both super awkward about it. You can write it as you wish.
warnings: i didn't make them twins so interpret her as you'd like, targ!cest (unintentional?), aemond and aegon taunting jace, high valyrion (i'm not fluent forgive me), takes place in 1.08 (lord of the tides), more angsty than awkward, aemond x reader if you squint really really hard?
“Her children are bastards! And she is a whore,” Vaemond Velaryon spoke with vemon on his tongue.
You and your brothers shared a glance of embarassment with one another.
Viserys hobbled up from his seat on the throne, “I will have your tongue for that.”
Before Viserys could get any further Dark Sister flung through the air, taking Vaemond’s head with her. Everyone in the room jumped back, your mother pushing you behind her, as your younger brother gasped.
“He can keep his tongue,” chaos erupted with the King’s guard.
“Disarm him!”
Daemon wiped the Velaryon blood off his sword and sheathed it, ushering you and his daughters out of the room, “No need.”
-
Later in the dining hall, you and your estranged family stood around a large table, Viserys was carried in and sat in between your mother and Alicent, “How good it is… to see you all tonight… together.”
One he was situated, all sat in the respective places, you between Jacaerys and Lucerys.
Alicent looked to her husband, “Prayer before we begin?”
“Yes,” your family was not the most religious, you looked to Jace, you looked back at you with an annoyed expression.
“May the Mother smile down on this gathering with love. May the Smith mend the bonds that have been broken for far too long. And to Vaemond Velaryon, may the gods give him rest.”
Viserys was the first to speak, just barely lifting his cup, “This is an occasion for celebration, it seems. My grandson Luke, will marry his cousins Rhaena, further strengthening the bond between our houses. A toast to the young Prince… and his betrothed! Hear, hear!”
The rest of the table rose their glasses and toasted to your younger brother.
Aegon, sitting next to Jace leaned over and spoke quietly, “Your younger brother bests you once again. Laying with a women before you.”
Viserys spoke again, “Let us toast as well Prince Lucerys… the future Lord of the Tides. Hear, hear!”
You smiled at him, squeezing his hand, “You’ll be great.”
Aegon continued on with him, “You do know how the act is done, I assume? At least in principle? Where to put your cock and all that.”
“Let it be, Aegon,” Helaena chastised him, tired of his jokes.
“You can play the jester if you wish, but hold your tongue before my sister,” Jace defended you.
Your family sat in tension, your grandsire felt the need to clear the air, “It both gladdens my heart and fills me with sorrow to see these faces around the table. The faces most dear to me in all the world… yet grown so distant from each other… in the years past.”
He takes his mask off his face and drops it on the table, “My own face… is no longer a handsome one… if indeed it ever was. But tonight… I wish you to see me… as I am. Not just a king… but your father. Your brother. Your husband… and your grand sire. Who may not, it seems… walk for much longer among you.”
He breathes heavily and struggles with his next words, “Let us no longer hold ill feelings in our hearts. The crown cannot stand strong if the House of the Dragon remains divided. But set aside your grievances. If not for the sake of the crown… then for the sake of this old man who loves you all so dearly.”
Your grandsire sits and the room was filled with silence, your mother arose from her place next to him.
“I wish to raise my cup to Her Grace, the Queen. I love my father. But I must admit that no one has stood… more loyally by his side than his good wife. She has tended to him with… unfailing devotion, love, and honor. And for that, she has my gratitude… and my apology.”
Alicent smiles solemnly to Rhaenyra, “Your graciousness moves me deeply, Princess.”
She stands and raises her cup, “We are both mothers… and we love our children. We have more in common than we sometimes allow. I raise my cup to you… and to your house. You will make a fine queen.”
Each at the table took turns toasting to the family, each aggrivating Jacaerys more.
Aegon, drunkenly, rose, turning to Luke, “I, um… I regret the disappointment you are soon to suffer. But if you ever wish to know what it is to be well satisfied, all you have to do is ask.”
Aegon smiles and turns to Jace now, “Ask me, of course. Your older brother would not know how to guide you.”
Jace stands, slamming his hands down on the table, you grab his wrist, “Jace.”
Sternly looking at him, he glances to you before raising his glass, “To Prince Aegon and… Prince Aemond,” Aemond’s face hardens, “We have not seen each other in years, but I have fond memories of our shared youth. And as men, I hope we may yet be friends and allies. To you and your family’s good health, dear uncles.”
Jace sits and Heleana stands, “I would like to toast to Baela and Rhaena. They’ll be married soon. It isn’t so bad. Mostly he just ignores you… except sometimes when he’s drunk.”
Aegon rolls his eyes in embarassment, Viserys smiles at his youngest daughter, and Daemon gently laughs.
Viserys feels ill and is taken out of the room. Only the Hightower side of the family is left.
You’ve always had a strained relationship with your uncles, but you did love Helaena, often times strolling in the gardens with her, or her teaching you some embroidery tricks.
Aemond glances at you from across the table, a dark and hungry look in his eyes. You look away from him and to your mother. She nods at you, as a way of saying that she would take care of it.
The pig comes out of the kitchens and is brought to the table, Luke chuckles at the sizzling pig. Aemond slams his fist on the table, capturing everyone’s attention.
“Final tribute. To the health of my nephews: Jace… Luke… and Joffrey. Each of them handsome, wise… hm… strong,” he looks to you and smirks, “And my niece, you are of age now, luck to you in finding a husband. Perhaps someone strong, maybe you will find home in the Riverlands.”
“Aemond,” Alicent warns.
You can see Jace fuming from beside you, but you gently nudge his foot under the table with yours. You keep your composure.
You hum, smirking back at him, “Kirimvose, yn nyke gīmigon nyke kostagon become tolī than sepār mirtys’s riñnykeā ābrazȳrys… Kepa.” Thank you, but I know I can become more than just someone's lady wife… uncle
“Kostilus se ābrazȳrys hen nykeā darilaros?” Perhaps the wife of a prince?
“Nyke unyishishk jorrāelagon daorun tolī than naejot sagon se ābrazȳrys hen dārys's tȳne tresy.” I would love nothing more than to be the wife of the king's second son.
Aemond’s face hardened. Only you, Aemond, your mother, and Daemon fully understood the words exchanged. Your mother and Daemon shared a look of pride.
Alicent looked at the interaction with confusion and furrowed brows.
“What are they saying?”
“Aemond has proposed a marriage it seems,” Rhaenyra speaks.
Jace looks at you almost angrily, “What did you say?”
All eyes were on you, “What she said is not important,” your mother interrupted.
She cleared her throat, “What matters is that my daughter will wed her brother, Jacaerys, heir to the Iron Throne. She will become queen one day; something more than someone’s lady wife.”
Everyone’s eyes widened. You felt heat rise to your cheeks. There is no way that your mother would have you marry your brother?
Aemond’s hardened grin turned to a smug one, “Well then, congratulations is in order to my niece and her strong husband.”
Jace stood and walked towards the center of the room, challenging his uncle, “I dare you to say that again.”
Aemond stood with him, walking to him, “Why? ‘Twas only a compliment,” he leaned into Jace, whispering into his ear, “Do you not think yourself Strong?”
Without hesitation, Jace swung at Aemond, getting in a good punch onto his jaw. Everyone around the table gasped, your mother yelled sternly, “Jace!”
Aemond reached for his blade, but his mother’s voice stopped him, “Aemond! That is enough!”
“Go to your quarters. All of you go, now.”
You stood and watched Jace walk out. You didn’t follow him to his quarters to check on him. You stayed in the hall and waited for your mother.
As she came out of the dining hall, you caught up with her.
“Mother!”
She turned to you, “Were you telling the truth… about me.. and Jace?”
Holding your face in her hands she stroked your cheek with her thumb and smiled gently at you, but you could not meet her eyes, “You will make a great queen one day, my sweet girl.”
She tugged at your chin to force you to look at her, “But now, you need to rest, we have quite the journey ahead of us back to Dragonstone, tomorrow.”
You nodded before heading back to your quarters. Nodding at the guards standing at your door, you pushed them open.
Jace, who was waiting for you on your bed, stood at your entrance. You sighed and rolled your eyes.
“Jacaerys, it is not proper for you to be in here… not anymore.”
“Please just listen.”
You walked around the room, releasing the maids of their duties, “Leave us.” The maids were quick to exit.
“I did not know she was going to say that!”
“I did not know Aemond would try to wed me tonight.”
“I’m sorry. We do not have to wed if you choose to take someone else’s hand—”
“No,” shaking your head, “It is.. our duty now, as the future queen’s eldests.”
“I promise to be a good husband—”
“Jacaerys, I do not wish to speak of this any longer.”
He spoke your name softly, “I’m sorry.”
“Leave me, Jace.”
He said your name more sternly now.
“Leave me, your grace.”
He sunk into himself, hands on his sheathed sword, nodding at you, “As you wish.”
You watch him leave, the door slamming behind him. You groaned in frustration, running your hands over your face and through your hair.
How are you supposed to marry your brother of all people?
253 notes · View notes
Text
I just. Can't get over Queen Marika as a character. Like just. Learning who those flesh amalgams in the Gaols actually are, seeing Shaman Village with how it is, and learning about how The Two Fingers have been abandoned by The Greater Will even before Marika's time...
But like. The most important thing to me is Shaman Village. The way it's sealed off behind a statue of Marika, and just. How sorrowful it is. It's still, it's peaceful, it's serene, but it's also empty. Within the field of flowers, you find a small sprout of a tree, surrounded by golden light. You receive the incantation that allows you to momentarily conjure up a minor erdtree, that heals all that it's light shines down upon.
What's truly important is what it means. "The kindness of Gold, without Order...
She basked her old village with this golden light, knowing full well there was nobody left to heal"...
It really hits me. Hard. That through all of Marika's corruption, her cruelty, her subjugations, her purges, her murders...
That she really did have the capacity to be a good person. She and her people were subjugated by Hornsent society, but that doesn't change what she did... a lot of people treat it as "justified", but that's a weak way to look at it, and misunderstands how Marika became THE ultimate subjugator with her Golden Order. She subjugated hornsent on an individual level, she also killed and cursed the giants, she had all these conflicts with all these other folks in the Lands Between, all to create some ideal order...
Now this is the part where is spirals out and it makes my head hurt to think about it all...
But man...
The point I am trying to make is how that gentle silence, and still beauty of Shaman Village, and how whoever Marika was in the past is just... completely lost...
"What was her prayer, her wish, her confession?
There is no one left to answer.
and Marika never returned home again."
All that remains is that still silence, those blooming flowers, rustling in the wind, and those gentle strums, to always remind us of what this place means, and what it represents...
153 notes · View notes
kalki-tarot · 1 year
Text
Channeled love letter from your soulmate 💌
Pick a pile <3
1 - 2 - 3
4 - 5 - 6
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
from left to right — Instinctively select the picture that feels right to you, whether based on your thoughts or the desires of your inner self. Choose the one that resonates with you, keeping in mind that this reading is meant to be general in nature and may not resonate with everyone.
Disclaimer — The images I used to select a pile were sourced from Pinterest, I hope the reading will resonate with you. I'm not responsible for any decisions you make in your life from my readings. I'm just a beginner and these readings are just for fun.
⌗ Check masterlist for more ! 🧿✨️
Pile 1
Hi baby! 👋 how are you? Tell me I'm listening to you. I can listen to you for hours, i just love your voice ya know!
I want to make you my princess 👸💓 No, you are my QUEEN!!
l'd leave this world for you my darling! I'd buy you any item you want. I love your eyes, i get lost in them. 🥺 I wanna look into your eyes forever!
Ahh, i can't resist being near you. Don't ever leave my side. It hurts when we are apart, i hate it even when we are just away for a few hours :(
I miss you sm! Time moves so fast with you around me! I get lost in you that I'm not aware of time passing by. We are getting older day by day, look how far we've come in this journey of love!
Everything moves so fast, it scares me! Time changes but me and you never. We have the same love for eachother. Aren't you proud of us?
With you, I just smile. I'm not aware of my sufferings when I'm with you baby.
I wanna go on dates with you, just like we used to before. I hate it when we are apart even it's just for a moment. Love me forever, be my forever please. Love you baby 💓
Please leave feedback in comments! Sending Lots of love <3
Pile 2
Wait ! Did I tell you how beautiful you are !? Just like a ball of sunshine. I get so mushy just from admiring your cuteness. You make me blush.
In a world full of negativity, cheating partners, situationships, hook ups etc. Aren't we lucky to have eachother for eternity as each other's loving a loyal partners?
We should be grateful as not everyone receives true love in their lives amidst these fake people.
Like would be so meaningless without love right? When you are with me everything is good for me, even the bad things.
I want to go on a cruise with you. It's my dream.
You are my love, you are in my prayers. I'm so passionate for you. Don't let these obstacles get in our way, don't be shy with me. You can say that you love me.
I get nervous around you too. Or we can just look in each other's eyes?
Be my life partner. I want to spend the rest of my life with you please. Not just life, i want you for an eternity.
If I could ask god for one wish, I'd ask for you in every lifetime. Everything is okay when you are around.
I can tell you my pains and sorrows and I can listen to yours. I get strength from your smiling, happy face. With you, earth is like heaven for me.
Isn't it beautiful that we are two bodies one soul? Even if I die, I'll come back to you, I promise.
Please leave feedback in comments ! Sending Lots of love ❤️
Pile 3
I'm in love with you. Time stops when I look at you. I can admire you for hours. I'm at peace with you.
You can call me a fool, but you are just like a fairy and I'm just a human, mesmerized by your enchanting beauty.
You give me peace, you voice, your soft hair, your eyes, everything about you makes me feel calm. You are a part of my soul.
I want to make you mine. I will spend all my nights in all the ups and downs of your life. I will be there in the bad times too, darling.
I'd write songs and poems about you. When you smile, it feels like heaven.
I really love you, trust me.
I really love you trust me.
I really love you, trust me (Idk they're just repeating this. They wanna make you trust in their purity of love)
Yes you can call me a fool whatever you want. But I'm madly in love with you.
Days and nights pass. I fear your absence. Life stops in your absence.
I'll do anything you want, I'll give you a bouquet of roses. Trust me, I love you.
You'll get addicted to me. (not in a bad way) You'll want me in your arms day and night. I know you want me. But you show that you don't, i know everything. I don't know what should I do, you too don't tell me. It's bad that you hide it from me. Don't do it, cuz i love you. Your nights would be sleepless without me. (Not in an nsfw way) Look closely into my heart, you'll find yourself.
Please leave feedback in comments ! Sending Lots of love ❤️
Pile 4
There is a limit to your emotional and physical capabilities, I know you are tired of telling everyone this and no one is listening to you, but be aware that I'm here for you, I'm listening to all of your needs. I know no one knows those things about your past, but don't let yourself fall.
Look at your passion for it! You are walking circles within yourself. I'm aware of everything but I can't do anything about it except to be there for you and to listen to you.
We are bound within our own worlds for now. Wait for me. If we lose our hopes now then how will me meet? I know life is teaching you so much. It's the same for me. But remember we are getting close to each other day by day.
Everyone left you at your worst, and your heart doesn't accept this. I know all of that. Please hold on a little longer I'm coming towards you.
Since the day you've stepped into my life, it's been sincerely great for me dear.
My destiny is written with your name. I don't know how to live without you, love? (They're a but emotional telling you this)
My heart hurts seeing you like this, everything will be okay. I learned how to live from you, but never without you. Can you please not cry? It hurts me.
And yes, every compliment I ever gave you was honest. Life feels like life with you. It's colorful with you. You are the sky to my earth. I look upto you.
Come here and hug me. This connection is for a thousand lifetimes. Don't hide your tears with me.
Our connection is a secret, i haven't told anyone about this. I remember you from our past life.
I miss you every second that passes. I feel alone without you. Do you too? Don't worry I'm on my way to you.
Lots of love, 💓
Yours Only ✨️💕🧿
Please leave feedback in comments !
Pile 5
My heart doesn't accept this. It's stubborn and doesn't listen to me. It's not willing to mend the broken strings.
Why can't we forgive our mistakes? I'm sacred everything will be lost.
I don't know, my heart doesn't believe in it. Why can't we be together? All the promises are broken now?
The relationship which grew so beautifully like a rose, why is it just thorns now? My heart doesn't recognize itself. I don't recognize myself.
We gambled our happiness. No one know about this. No one knows our pain.
Our silence keeps screaming. You might be happy without me, but I'll be not.
I don't pray now, I've lost hope.
Why should I be embarrassed about telling people that I'm nothing without you?
See, you're making me go crazy. But I still want you, there's no other place I wanna be except near you.
Time will heal my pain. Who knows I'll be there tomorrow or not. Please accept me. Your thoughts keep me awake at night.
Pile 6
The night of our union will be magical. It'll bring lots and lots of happiness and healing.
I can sense the naughtiness in your eyes.
I want to have a child with you. The house will be empty no more.
You are like a dream I never wanna wake up from.
This world feels wrong, you are the only right thing in my life.
You've become my everything. My laugh, my cries. Everything.
This world tells me that my love is unrequited, atleast i can admire you from afar.
You are the last reason I'm living. And the first reason of my happiness.
Please leave feedback in comments!
Thanks for reading. Please be kind in the comments, I'm just a beginner so don't take these readings seriously. Take what resonates. And ignore grammatical errors please, english is not my first language.
660 notes · View notes
surielstea · 4 months
Text
Give ‘em a show
Based on this request.
Tumblr media
Pairing: High Lord!Eris x High Lady!Reader
Summary: The autumn court celebrates the equinox with a great rite of their own, what happens when the High Lord finds out Reader left the Forest House in search for him?
Warnings: Smut | minors dni | p in v | reader and Eris are both aroused by a higher power (?) | breeding kink | riding | public sex (on throne) | dirty talk | praise | cream pie | multi-orgasm
A/N: Sorry this took me forever, but I’m really happy with how it turned out so I hope you guys enjoy! 🧡🧡
6.2k words
Tumblr media
It was the most festive day of the year in autumn, the equinox. When both night and day are perfectly divided and everything feels at peace. We called it Mabon. The peak of nature's abundance.
The holiday usually entailed freshly harvested crops and feasts to satisfy an entire continent. People gathered to the crop fields and pray, whether it be for good fortune or the wealth of the earth it didn't matter. They honored the soil beneath their feet as much as any other living thing. Similar to Calanmai in the spring there are bonfires in every direction, dancing surrounding the pits.
This was also the day high Fae reinforced the wards around their homes, seeing it as a new beginning.
Some prefer to stay at home and pray to the gods of fire, knelt by the flames that warmed them, having a simple meal of bread and grain. I, however, did not. During the day I'd plant fresh herbs and seeds, placing them in the richest of soils then saying a soft prayer until they began to grow. My harvesting powers have always been my favorite, being able to merely look at a seed and turn it into a blooming flower in the blink of an eye would forever be my favorite party trick.
During the night of Mabon however, I indulged myself in the finest of whiskeys and got drunk as all hel, claiming it was a tradition and a night of commemoration.
"All done?" Eris asked as I came back into the Forest House, my knees covered in dirt from kneeling in the gardens.
"All done." I gave him a small smile and he mirrored it while taking my wide-brimmed sun hat from my head.
"As cute as you look, you need to go change." He hands me the hat and I blink up at him confused. "Or have you forgotten your duties as High Lady?" He arched a manicured brow and I rolled my eyes.
My traditions would be different this year. It was Eris' first year as High Lord, meaning he'd have to put on a show to make sure everyone knew just how powerful he was. Whatever that meant. This also means my job was no longer getting drunk off my face but rather waiting alone in our bedroom where we'd consummate in order to release the power of the High Lord and grace the land with it, allowing harvests and crops to grow until the next Mabon.
"High Lady or not, I'd like to spend my night in a pub with my friends, not some stuffy room with your advisors." I scowl and a smirk tugs at his lips as I drape my hands around his neck.
"A lady of her people." He hums and my grin widens.
"Does that mean you'll let me have my holiday?" I bat my lashes at him.
"I can't," He sighs.
"Eris," I whine. "You're high lord now, fuck me in front of the rest of them for all I care just let me enjoy myself." I plead and he gives me a sorrowful gaze.
"It'll only be a few hours, you'll survive." He placed his hands on my waist and I narrowed my eyes at him.
"But what if you find some other girl on your way to me? I don't like the idea of you roaming this court half naked for just anyone to see, Eris," I dramatically fall into his chest, he tightens his hold on me as if I'm actually going to fall.
"Trust me, all I'll want is you," He guides me back upright so I can stand on my own. "Now go get dressed." His hold on me loosens and I give him the nastiest scowl I can muster.
"Fine, but only because I love you." I excuse as I place the floppy hat atop his head, I think the pink bow brought out his eyes.
"Love you too," He smiles sloppily as I leave his hold, the sun hat remaining on his head as I move away from him, his hand coming down to pat me on the ass, as if encouraging a faster rate, making me toss a glare back at him.
In between now and the beginning of Mabon's night festivities I passed the late afternoon stuck in a meeting room, which was as boring as I thought it was going to be. I spent the entire time drawing the high lord in front of me, making sure to match the glint in his golden eyes to his crown, pure regality as he sat in front of Advisors that used to be in his father's corner.
It's been past an hour, the sun reaching the horizon had told me so, I could already smell the scent of smoke from the bonfires and I knew my time was being wasted. "My lady, are you listening?" I snap to attention, clutching my sketchbook from beneath the table and looking at the male who had snapped his fingers at me, earning a low grumble from Eris as a warning.
"Yes," I answer on instinct.
"Really?" Eris leans forward, muscular forearms resting against the wooden table.
"Mhm." I nod with slightly tinged cheeks, I could never lie to Eris, something about the mating bond, or rather just him, in general, had me somehow giving myself away.
"You wouldn't lie to me, would you Fawn?" He narrows his gaze on me and it takes everything in my power to not give in, tell him that every word since greetings has gone in one ear and out the other. All this information was useless anyway, old rules that Beron followed. Not Eris. I don't understand why my mate entertained these old males.
"You know what?" A bright grin spreads over my features as I stand, my chair pushing back against the floor as everyone looks up at me.
"All of you may take an early holiday, enjoy the night, and spend time with your families." I dismiss and they blink up at me.
"Really?" One of them babbles.
"Yeah, really?" The high lord glared at me and my grin widened.
"Really." I nod.
"With all due respect, you're not one to be giving orders around here." The eldest of them scoffed and my smile faltered, I had never expected to hear that in my own court.
"She's your high lady and you will do as she says. Now go before I change my mind." He shoos the male away. Eris may not have liked me cutting the meeting short but he wasn't going to tolerate any discourtesy against me, it may have been wrong to use it to my advantage but all I wanted to do at the moment was curl up by the fire with a freshly poured glass of wine. Second best to getting hammered at the pubs like I would've been doing this time last year.
"You heard him, go." I make hands that send them away and they all scramble off, shuffling out the door with a haste I haven't seen in a while. I smile softly as the last male disappears.
"You are a cruel female." Eris leans back into his seat at the head of the table. I grab my sketchbook and walk down the long stretch of the meeting hall until I'm right beside him.
"Cruel? Or smart?" I tilt my head as I hoist myself up onto the table in front of him.
"Show me what you were drawing that entire time." He places a ringed finger on the top of my pencil and I flip to the page of his half-shaded figure, flipping around to show the male his unfinished portrait. A satisfied grin spreads over his lips as he sees that he is the subject, but he shouldn't be surprised because he is always the subject.
"Is this whole book me?" He flicks through the pages and I pull back before he can see all the drawings of him I sketched from memory on a particularly desperate night when he was gone on a mission.
"Don't be so full of yourself, I wasn't going to draw any of those old males." I roll my eyes and he chuckles. "Plus I was listening, I could draw you with my eyes closed," I confess and he raises a brow, his lopsided smirk making me feel warm inside. "Now can you please just get this celebration over with then come back to me?" I place the sketchbook beside me and look back at him.
"And what will you do while I'm gone?" He places his hands on my hips, a soft look in his eyes.
"Lots of drinking." I shrug, taking hold of his crown and making it crooked atop his head.
"You're quite the drunk." He grumbles and I chuckle.
"I'm a tavern keeper's daughter, what more do you expect?" I grin innocently and he shakes his head in disbelief.
"Alright, come with me," He slips his hand into mine and guides me out of the meeting room.
I intertwine our fingers, occasionally bumping into him, the comparison of his steady figure, walking with only solid steps and articulated movements contrasted to my bounding, my arm brushing his with every step. It was a silent kind of intimacy, our dynamic.
"This my cell for the night?" I ask as we stop in front of our bedroom, a grand suite that seems more like an apartment.
"Don't act like I'm locking you up," He sighs, crossing his arms.
"You're right, I could easily sneak out," I taunt and he narrows his eyes on me.
"I'm not going to put guards outside these doors, however, if I learn that you've left I will find you," He says, his tone shifting from playful to menacing all in one sentence. "And depending on where you are, I might just fuck you in front of all of them," His words sink to my core, it wasn't much of a warning if it was my idea to begin with.
"Don't threaten me with a good time," I smirk up at him, mirroring his.
"I'll be back for you, soon," He promises, free hand coming to my jaw, the other still preoccupied with mine. His thumb rubbed over my jaw, pressing with a pressure that told me he didn't want to see this room empty when he returned.
"I'll be waiting," I sigh, leaning into his hand. He frowns.
"I'm sorry Fawn, but I doubt I'll be able to control myself with you so near," He shifts back to his usual self, the compassionate one.
"I understand, it's okay," I mumble, even if this was the last place I wanted to be during the holidays. He leans down and presses a yearning kiss onto my lips, the kind full of promise of what was to come later tonight.
He pulls away with a reluctance I immediately recognized. Whatever power that was going to consume him tonight was already forming, I could feel it through the bond like someone on his side of the tether was sparking embers.
"Don't leave this room." He warned one last time and all I could do was nod and then watch him leave.
I had never wanted to leave a room more in my entire life.
Eris forgot to put his shields up on his side of the bond and it was driving me fucking mad. I could feel the power of him, flowing through the very floorboards beneath my feet. His arousal was immense, or perhaps it was mine— I wasn't sure. Maybe being High Lady had its own effects, maybe it made the mated female just as willing to consummate with the High Lord. The intense heat running up and down my spine reminded me of when Eris and I had accepted the mating bond, The Frenzy that took over both of us full throttle, I had managed that because he had been so near at the time, it had only lasted a few moments before he was touching where I needed him most but this, with him so far, gods this was unbearable.
I looked out the window like an animal eagerly waiting for their owner to return, but I couldn't see anything beyond the maple trees, only the smoke of the bonfires and all that promised with it.
I leaned my forehead against the cold window, it relieved me for only a split second before the heat of my body returned.
It started less than an hour ago, bloomed right at my core, and has only grown since. It would reach my head soon and I don't know what I'd do at that point. I had already put the fire in the hearth out but it felt as if I was the furnace and embers were still popping against my bare skin that mistook me for kindling.
I had practically stripped to my socks, but even my undergarments had been too much to bear. I wore a silk slip with a lace trim that was lighter than a feather and softer than anything I had ever felt before but on my burning skin, it felt like a winter coat.
If the window was cold then outside must've been colder, autumn air sweeping over the continent and beckoning at my very window, who was I to keep it out?
I pushed the window open with a grunt in agony, the sweet feeling of the light breeze kissing against my skin practically made me crumble in relief.
I latch the window all the way open and lean my head out the sill, the sound of music and cheering in the distance suddenly became so prominent but it was hard to hear anything over the blood rushing to my ears, dizziness consuming me as I grip the ledge of the window, something buried deep inside of me yearned for him in the direction of the music, and now that my head was out the window my body seemed to think I was teasing it, what it wanted so much closer now that the line to the outside world was crossed, the feeling so intense I thought I might start coughing up blood.
I grunt, attempting to talk myself through the pain, telling myself repeatedly that I've endured worse, that I was stronger this, that Eris would be back any moment now and— and oh gods, Eris. It was a mistake to let him cross my mind because all of a sudden he consumed every thought I could conjure, my mind in his hands and he was gripping it, not willing to let go.
I decided I didn't give a fuck if Eris was mad if I left the house, the pain I was enduring was horrific and the only way to relieve it was to disobey exactly what he ordered me to do. Don't leave this room. I slipped out the window with gasps of pain, landing on the soft grass. I was just grateful to be located on the first floor, close enough to the ground to jump from without shattering the bones in my legs.
Hounds rush up towards me before I can even take my first step.
They looked as if they were about to bark, to alert their owner that I had left the house but they saw my desperation, hel, they probably smelt it.
Rivin, the eldest of the shadow hounds rushed up to me first, staring up at me with a cock of his head, clearly concerned for my well-being. "Can you take me to Eris?" I murmur, praying the dog can understand me, I bring my hand to his snout and he chuffs, licks the palm of my hand then takes off running towards the sounds of the music.
I tried to stay as close as I could to the dog, he had taken the route through trees and behind stands, which I was grateful for since it kept me out of sight, however, it made it a lot easier to lose him amongst the trees. But he always came trotting back after a minute without him in my sights.
Eventually, the dog stopped in his tracks, his front paws prancing at the floor and communicating that he had finished his job. I creased my brows and looked around my surroundings but before I could talk to the dog again he ran off with the rest of his pack, back towards the house.
I had only just realized that whatever heat that was suffocating me in the Forest House had dissipated, still lingering below the surface but no longer unbearable.
I huffed, unsure what to do in the middle of the forest with a feeding wretchedness in the pit of my stomach.
I decided on heading towards where the largest plume of smoke was coming from, I had seen the set up of Mabon hundreds of times and knew this was the way to the throne, knew Eris must be sat upon it.
I hadn't explored Mabon much during previous years, I was always a barmaid for my father's pub, it had gotten crazy business during the week of Mabon so he needed any help he could get, funnily enough, that's how I met Eris.
I shake my head at the memory, thinking about Eris was almost painful, it felt like something was being carved out of me every moment I was without him.
I seethed a string of curses as I continued my trudge through the trees, staying in the shadows and avoiding the eyes of any drunk wanderers. I doubted they'd recognize me as their high lady anyway, Eris was the only one who ever saw me outside of my gowns and robes, this lacy slip was practically lingerie compared to the heavy dresses I often wore.
Lucky for me it had blended in with the other girls perfectly, in fact, I had seemed more covered up than most. Once I had made it out into the open area I spotted Eris immediately. On the throne, as expected, his legs spread wide and I wanted nothing more than to put myself between them.
He was shirtless, forest green paint smeared onto his body in tribal patterns of lines and dots, but he was glistening in sweat, drops running down the side of his face, through the grove of his abdomen. I didn’t want to think about who had the honor of putting that paint into those very groves, I only wanted to think about being the one to wash it off.
Heat pooled in my stomach as his eyes found mine from across the way, my body went rigid as he trekked his gaze down it, then so slowly back up, taking in every bare inch as well as every clothed part of me, like he was wondering just how perfect I looked underneath.
My knees shook as he lifted his hand and with two fingers waved me over. Waves of heat wash over me at every step I take closer, the power that radiated off of him left me defenseless, and the pain I had experienced earlier subsided entirely in favor of morphing into arousal.
Once I reach the dais I curtsy with a playful smile. "I thought I asked you to stay inside?" He purred, his voice rougher than usual, making my legs tremble.
"I missed you," I shrug, attempting to keep my composure but he opened his side of the bond entirely as soon as I was done speaking and my knees buckled. So, much, power.
It surged at my fingertips, blazed down my spine, and coiled in my abdomen. I couldn't imagine how Eris felt if I was only receiving an influence of it.
"C'mere," He lifts his hips, readjusting them in his ornate throne and I almost choke on my own tongue. He was going to push me over that dangerous edge and he didn't even need to say anything to do it.
I take the steps up the dais and I realize the silence in the crowd save for the music, people were watching, and couldn't keep their eyes off of the two of us. The offering between High Lord and Lady, the melding bond between us so clear on a night like this that any outsider could see that golden tether just as well as he or I could.
"On my lap, Fawn," He glances down to his thigh and I swallow thickly. "Oh, don't tell me you've become shy all of the sudden?" He smirks at the idea. I had told him I was willing to let him fuck me in front of all these people— still was, and yet sitting on his lap was the line to the path that I wasn't sure I could come back from.
My coaxing arousal won the battle and I took my final steps toward him, closing that distance, his hand came to the back of my thigh and I nearly melted at his touch, my body quivering in reaction because gods, if I had felt like a kindling fire earlier then he was a fucking inferno.
His fingers singed with flames but I felt none of the added heat as I took my place on his lap, straddling over his thigh and wrapping my arms around the nape of his neck, pulling him so close I wish I could've melted right into him, slotted myself into each of his grooves and stayed there, impossible to clean, impossible to get rid of.
My lips came to his neck without any forethought, I didn’t have control over my own mind, it was entirely consumed by him, his intoxicating scent of cinnamon, clove, and now an undertone of something different, something just as mouth-watering as the way his hands felt on my bare skin.
I fought the thoughts that told me to rip my dress off and decided to put my hands to better use and rub them down his chest, pressing my palm into his abdomen as I continued kissing his neck. I sucked and licked and nipped without caution, I didn't care if others were watching, he had never been more powerful than he was in this moment, both over others physically and over me mentally.
The domination running through his veins was attractive, so damned powerful and yet he knew how to control it, to conceal it beneath his skin rather than flaunt it, and he shared a fraction of it with me, a simple kernel of it was enough to send me spiraling.
"What are you doing? Dance," Eris spits at his subjects and they immediately do as he says, the music picking up in a crescendo of rushed notes to meet his demand.
I smiled against his shoulder at how much authority he held, my hips involuntarily winding over his thigh and I let out a soft, pleasurable sound. He grunts in return.
"If you keep making those sounds we're not going to make it back to our bedroom," He warns lowly beside my ear and I rut my hips again at the perfect sound.
"I don't know what's wrong— fuck," I'm cut off by my soft moan, his muscled thigh providing just the right amount of friction against my clit. "I don't know what's wrong with me, but I need you to fuck me now," I plead and I sense a sudden change in his demeanor.
"Now?" He hums and I can hear the smirk in his voice. Damned bastard. "In front of all these people?" He intones and I nod helplessly.
"However you want me, wherever, just— gods do it now," I beg, continuing to wind my hips over his thigh.
His foxlike smirk doesn't falter as his hands grip my hips, halting my needy movements only to guide me down onto his thigh himself, my core aching as he does so. I cry out at the feeling, it shouldn't have felt this good, it's never been this intense, even when our mating bond clicked I hadn't been so consumed by his fire that was so dangerously out of control and feeding into my own.
"I need you inside of me," I murmur, coming to the conclusion that this torment will not subside until he finds release inside of me, the mother herself was impelling us to consummate, to breed, and I was more than willing to oblige for her.
"Eris," I grip at his shoulder, paint smearing onto my hands, soiling my nightgown. But I didn't care, any piece of him spreading onto me felt like it was a gift from the gods, and I needed more. "Please, fill me," I beg into the warmth of his neck.
"You want me to come inside you? Want these people to watch while I give you an heir?" He taunts, his words ghosting against the shell of my ear. I reply with a pitiful whimper, unsure what to retort with because he was right. I didn't care who was watching, as long as they knew I was his and he was mine.
"Yes," I pant, my hand coming to the back of his neck. "That's exactly what I want," I plead, the rutting of my hips not slowing for a moment. "Show them I'm yours,"
My words seemed to push him over that fine line and he had obeyed. His rough hands grip my waist, pulling me over his hips so I was no longer straddling his thigh but rather angled just above his cock that was strained in his pants, the confinement so tight it almost seemed painful.
“Yeah?” He hummed and I nodded helplessly. “You want everyone to hear just how pretty your moans are when you’re sitting on my cock?” He asked and I whimpered, feeling powerless under his stare. Whatever heat that had been affecting me tonight had doubled over with his arousing words.
“I can’t be gentle with you right now,” He gritted through clenched teeth, the tip of his nose drawing a line up the side of my throat. “Can’t, control myself right now,” He murmured in warning and I smiled at the idea of having an effect on him as much as he did on me.
“I don’t want control,” I sigh against the side of his neck. “I need you now controlled or not, so please, Eris fuck me,” I begged and with one last kiss to my neck he obliged.
With an expert hand, he tore my underwear right from my hips, pulling the lace off like it was nothing. My heat was now left bare but it didn’t stop me from grinding down onto his bulge. I was staining his pants with my slick, dripping down onto him and he groaned as my wetness seeped through the material.
“Fuck, you’re drenched,” He admired and I nodded with purely innocent eyes, the kind that silently pleaded for him to fill me until he was satiated.
All I felt was hunger, and I could tell by the way flames alighted in his gaze that he felt it too.
Quickly, he removed his leathers and his cock springs up, smacking against my soaked folds, my pussy leaking over his length. The heat between us must’ve been record-breaking, I felt like a candle burning all too fast, making a mess of wax that he was too slow to clean.
The moment I felt his tip prod at my entrance my nails dug into his shoulder. I still didn’t know what it was that was wrong with me, I had never experienced an ache quite like this, the kind that only he could patch over.
“Please,” I cry, my cunt weeping as I crave for him to sink his length into me. “Show them how good you fuck me,” I mewl and perhaps it was the taboo factor of it all, how thrilling it was to have an audience while I rode him, but that had been his breaking point before he gripped the tops of my thighs and pushed me down onto his length.
My breath catches in my throat as I stretch around him, around every inch of him. He was so very large, and on any other night he’d need to fuck me with his fingers first, make sure I was ready for his member without the pain, but tonight we are both so needy that any foreplay was thrown out the window the moment I left our bedroom.
The pain was disguised as pleasure as he helped guide me lower onto him, it hadn’t been unbearable since I was slick with a natural lubricant, my arousal dripping down my thighs and onto his, as I took him deeper and deeper.
I swore he met places he’s never touched before, and fuck was it more than anything I had ever wanted.
This feeling was the god ecstasy prayed to, and I was blessed by it.
“That’s it, just like that, fuck yourself on my cock Fawn,” He encourages and I gasp out my moan, finally reaching his base, pressing against it with mine.
“Your court is watching, give ‘em a show for me,” He purrs, and so I do exactly that.
I begin to lift on his length, my knees buckling at the action but I ignore the pain and favor it for the pleasure as I drop down onto him, wielding gravity as my weapon. He lets out a low grunt and I do it again, continuing the action over and over again, bouncing on his cock just like he asked.
“Fuck, so good for me,” He praised, his eyes blazing with an untamable fire. “Such a good girl,” He sighs, his head craning back, leaning into his golden throne as his hands slip beneath my nightgown.
He didn’t take the dress off, because there were simply just some things he refused to let anyone else see, and though I was getting off on having an audience he wasn’t going to let everyone else get off on it too. He grips my hips tightly from beneath the slip, his callouses scraping against my soft skin, burning it with an unyielding pain, the kind that brings pleasure with it.
His cock seemed just as hot as I continued to fuck myself on it, the vein on the underside pulsing so feverishly I could feel it. The head of him pressed right into that sweet spot and it was a miracle I hadn’t come yet, gods he was going to send me over that edge any second now.
My lips connect with his, and he responds to the familiar feeling on instinct, his tongue slipping beneath my lips and tasting every fraction of me he can get his mouth on.
I moan onto his tongue every time he presses that deep spot inside of me, my noises only adding to the sound of skin slapping and the lewd sound of my pussy taking every inch of him. Our own music drowned out the symphony playing for the others.
“Eris, I can’t,” I pant against his lips. “I’m gonna come,” I warn and he smirks.
“So soon?” He taunts and I nod pitifully, continuing to rut my hips over his.
“Please, it hurts,” I whine, tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. And it did hurt, it hurt to not be granted that release I craved so desperately.
“Go ahead, make a mess all over my lap,” He allows and I would’ve wept at the words if my orgasm hadn’t consumed me first.
It felt like pure fire, setting me aflame and impossible to control. It was the kind of climax that lingered for hours on end, the kind that left my legs jolting and my eyes struggling to open. I let out a loud moan, so loud that if the dancing fae hadn’t known what had been happening, they did now. “You did so well baby,” He hums as I slowly come down from my high but I don’t have the strength to lift off his cock, and I definitely didn’t have the willpower to continue my movements. My thighs were burning and I hadn’t noticed until my climax settled.
“You done?” He coos and I nod, but the tone of his voice tells me it is him who is nowhere near finished with me, his member still hard inside of me evidence of that.
He didn’t warn me before he winnowed us back to the Forest House, the same position except he was no longer sitting on the throne but rather our bed.
I whine, falling limp against his shoulder. “I can’t take anymore, Eris,” I sigh and he shakes his head.
“Oh, no baby you said you wanted an heir and I’m going to give one to you.” He flipped us over so I was splayed out on my back, sinking into the mattress with my legs hooked around him.
“Eris I’m not on a tonic— fuck,” I try but he felt so much deeper in this position.
“Does it feel like I care?” He sighs into my hair and I shake my head no. “That’s right, now be a good girl and stay true to your word,” He demanded and I swallowed thickly, nodding while he lifted one of my legs up to hook on his shoulder, spreading my legs wide as I clamped down onto him.
“Fuck, I can’t wait to fill this pretty pussy, squeezing me so tight,” He grunted and I lost all cohesive thoughts, strings of moans escaped me as he rolled his hips down onto mine, his full balls slapping against my folds as his pace quickened.
“More,” I plead.
“Yeah? You want me to fill you don’t you?” He says and I was quick to show my agreement by squeezing around him tighter. “You just can’t wait to have my babes, isn’t that right?” He grunted into the shell of my ear and I nodded with a hum of restless accord. “Your tits are gonna be so fucking swollen,” He sighs and I clench around him at his dirty words. “You like that?” He kisses up my neck.
“Mhm, want your seed in me, Eris,” I whine and he twitches, a sign he’s nearing his climax.
I was hungry for his warm release, ached for it to fill my every crevice, let it seep into my womb.
I met his thrusts with my own sudden desire, sending my hips down onto him while he drove his cock right into that spongy bundle of nerves.
“I’m close,” He grunts.
“Me too,” I whimper, my legs locking up as my orgasm races to meet me.
My hands go into his hair and I pull at his short locks as my second climax finds me and I’m squeezing around him tighter than ever before. My walls flutter around him, and my pussy twitched as he continues his fast pace. He groans at the intense convulsions around him and suddenly his release is spurring out into me, kissing my cervix as he does so, his seed shooting out on a straight path to my womb.
“Fuck,” He sighed while guiding my leg down from his shoulder, and with a few more languid, slow strokes of his cock he finishes, slipping from my heat and falling down onto the bed beside me, both of us out of breath and settling over the action we had just committed to.
I clench my thighs shut, keeping his warm seed nestled inside of me. “Good?” I ask and he flips onto his side, arm slinging over my sweat-slicked body, pulling me into him.
“So good.” He presses kisses to the top of my head and I flip around to face him, my eyes heavy with exhaustion.
“I think I like this High Lord stuff,” I say, my hand coming to his cheek and he chuckles, leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss to my lips.
“I think so too,” He whispered against my mouth, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“Alright, let’s get you cleaned up,” He sat up, pulling me with him and I groaned. “You can sleep after, I promise, Fawn,” He said with a gentle tone that rivaled his earlier rough grunts.
“Eris please, just lay with me for a few more minutes,” I huff stubbornly and he shakes his head, hauling me from the bed and taking me to the connected bathroom.
“I’ll lay by you all night after I clean you up. Sound like a deal?” He says, settling me down onto the cold counter that sent shivers up my spine and I lazily nodded, looking up at him. He grins and leans closer, pressing a kiss to my forehead.
“I love you,” He whispers and I match his smile.
“Love you too, Eris.” I look up at him with only honesty in my gaze. “Now hurry up, I’m tired,” I grumbled and he chuckled.
“Alright, alright.” He shakes his head in disbelief, wetting a cloth with warm water before beginning to clean me up, treating me with utter tenderness after he gave me the two best orgasms of my life. This male was going to be the death of me, and I was going to love every moment of it until that day.
Tumblr media
General Taglist: @fxckmiup @olive-main @iluvyewman-blog @gaymistakeboi @glitterypirateduck @amara-moonlight @impossibelle @fauxdette @going-through-shit @glam-targaryen @cauldronboilme27 @sarawritestories @tele86 @rogerbarnesxx @azriels-shadowsinger @stinkinstuffie @sandramalikstyles-blog @sassyangel16 @lilah-asteria @starsinyourseyes @inloveallthetime @melsunshine @nighttimemoonlover @ireallywannasleep127 @cumuluscranium @adharanotfound @azrielsmate3 @aelincaddel @hiddlestonspassionsackx @dee-writes-smut @secretlyhers @pit-and-the-pen @mybestfriendmademe @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @circe143 @bubybubsters @joshysloshy@username199945 @notsarareallynot @vixenshiftsvrs @mahealanipunea @pey2618 @loving-and-dreaming @andreperez11 @nerdy4itall @whatsupbi8 @one-big-fangirl
Tumblr media
357 notes · View notes
Text
Imagine a zombie apocalypse where all Wizarding World characters start with the same amount of food, shelter and weapons.
- No magic
Who would survive the longest?
In my humble opinion,
Naturally, Lucius Malfoy, Phineas Nigellus Black, Gilderoy Lockhart, etc would be dead within a day. 
Sorrows, sorrows prayers
Sirius Black would probably go insane. There is an equal chance of him dying and living.
Snape would last a while because he’d know which berries and fungi are safe to eat and at least he wouldn’t starve to death. I don’t see what his weakness would be. (Stamina?)
Harry would probably die saving someone, let’s be honest. Or it’d be a Carl Grimes situation where he’d try to help someone out of the goodness of his heart and end up bit.
But now that I think of it, he would probably be immune to the virus beca he’s the chosen one.
Hermione would not believe that zombies are as dangerous as they say and wouldn’t listen to anyone before seeing it for herself, eventually leading to her ending up dead, or worse expelled.
I think Tom Riddle/Voldemort would have a solid chance because he would make a wonderful leader of a group but doesn’t mind throwing others under the bus to survive.
As seen in the movies Narcissa Malfoy knows exactly when to change sides and has great self preservation skills. And she does it all for her baby which leads me to Draco.
Draco would survive for a while, not because he is competent enough to survive, but because he’s in the group with mommy and uncle Voldy.
Speaking of Tom/Voldemort throwing people under the bus, Bellatrix would be the first under said bus, in a poorly thought out and futile attempt to prove herself to Voldymort.
Then there’s this guy,
Tumblr media
And he really reminded me of this guy(iykyk),
Tumblr media
Maybe Sebastian is a bit less psychopathic and deranged, but he’s getting there, and I think that seeing his freshly kedavra’d uncle get up and eat his sister might do the trick.
I’ll say he’d probably last years.
Speaking of Hogwarts Legacy characters Professor Garlick as well as Ominis Gaunt are immune. Same goes for Luna Lovegood and Newt Scamander
Why?
Because I love them and because I said so. They aren’t dying
Alright I’ve been yapping for way too long, let me know what you think about this concept.
115 notes · View notes
willyoubemycherryy · 7 months
Text
❥𝑚𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑒𝑑𝑢𝑐𝑡𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑎𝑐𝑒 𝒈𝒇 𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝒘/ 𝑱𝒐𝒆 𝑹𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒛 💕 thanks to this edit:
@missusnora @eleanorbaybars
❣︎𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: (𝑖𝑡'𝑠 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑛𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑖𝑡 𝑠𝑜 𝑓𝑙𝑢𝑓𝑓 𝑢𝑟 ℎ𝑎𝑖𝑟 𝑏𝑒𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑏𝑎𝑏𝑒𝑠)𝑚𝑎𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑢𝑡, 𝑐𝑢𝑟𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔/𝑠𝑤𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝐽𝑜𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑠 𝑎 𝑏𝑖𝑔 𝑓𝑎𝑡 𝑑𝑖𝑐𝑘 𝑏𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎, 𝐽𝑜𝑒 𝑖𝑠 𝑎𝑙𝑠𝑜 𝑎 𝑐𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑓𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑘 𝑏𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛, 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎, 𝑠𝑙𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑠𝑖𝑧𝑒 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑘, 𝑔𝑖𝑟𝑙𝑦 𝑖𝑠 𝐷𝑂𝑊𝑁 𝐵𝐴𝐷 𝑓𝑜𝑟 ℎ𝑖𝑚, ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑢𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛,𝑑𝑖𝑟𝑡𝑦 𝑡𝑎𝑙𝑘, 𝑚𝑎𝑛ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝑢𝑛𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑡𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑠✬𝑥, 𝑏𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑘 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢'𝑙𝑙 𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑠 𝑖𝑡 𝑑𝑒𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛, 𝑝✪𝑟𝑛 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑝𝑙𝑜𝑡,𝑚𝑦 𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑢𝑎𝑙 𝒔𝒏𝒂𝒕𝒄𝒉𝒎𝒖𝒇𝒇𝒊𝒏 𝑤𝑟𝑜𝑡𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑓𝑟𝑜𝑚 ℎ𝑜𝑟𝑛𝑦 𝑗𝑎𝑖𝑙, MINORS NO😡
. ...
“𝐈 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐜𝐮𝐳’ 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝒔𝒐, 𝒔𝒐 𝒔𝒐𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒅. 𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒈𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆, 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐞, 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒔𝒐...“
Tumblr media
Innocently enough you were actually supposed to be doing something on campus. Yet here you are currently with your dress rucked around your waist, tongue kissing and grinding on your Blonde Babe™️ boyfriend.
Sorrows and prayers to your responsibilities.
He’s not even supposed to be in your room. Inside a strict all girl dormitory with rules against “gentleman callers” and such. Your concern for that, however, goes out the window when you feel his big rough hands feel up your body, thumbs teasing your hard nipples through your dress and trail down, squeezing your ass. He feels so good. And he’s so pretty…god you need him to ruin you.
“Mmmh- Joe-…”, you moan softly, pulling away from the kiss to look at him. Bad idea.
His half-lidded blue eyes are nearly black, lips swollen and shiny. “Wanna stop?”, he breathes out, the husk in his already deep voice adds to the heat inside of you.
“No-!”, stopping was the LAST thing you wanted, “I just wanna be on top this time”, having to choke the words out because of him suddenly sucking wetly all over your throat. Moaning when his broad tongue licks up your jaw before slotting his plump lips over yours, kissing you deeply. Distantly aware of the fact that you’re dripping all on him as your eyes roll back into your skull. Body hot with every pulse of your cunt.
Joe isn’t opposed to you being on top but, you’re already so fucked out just from a little kissing and humping…
“Mmm okay. S’fine with me”, and that’s your green light as his voice paired with his gaze sends you into a frenzy.
Clothes can’t come off fast enough.
He’s so effortlessly hot that it’s unfair. And honestly, that’s how you two got like this. It was all his fault really. Sexy blonde hair, the constant bedroom eyes, goddamn tall, focused, and easygoing demeanor.
Naked and ready to rock his world, you give him a quick peck insisting you don’t need prep when he asks. Which is usually necessary since he’s so big all around. Broad chest and shoulders, thick muscled arms, thighs, and massive hands. Your fingers barely touch when you wrap them around him but it’s fine. You look up but he’s already looking at you.
“Y’need me to help ya put it in?“
Fuck, shit, hell, damnit, that’s the last straw and you sink down on him.
Gasping, it burns as he stretches you out, like actually hurts, but it hurts in the best way possible. Moaning in unison, Joe grabs your waist tight, suckling wet kisses all over your chest, breathing in your sweet scent.
You smell so good that he wishes he could bend you over and eat you every day.
The pleasure that rips through you has you gasping while you roll your hips and start riding him. His cock hits every spot as it fucks into your sopping cunt over and over. Your eyes water but you keep them on anything but him because the way he looks at you is too much. It’s bad enough that you’re so soaked it’s audible. Wet smacks, heavy breathing, and your near crying as Joe slams you down on his fat cock.
Sometimes he’s gentle but when you get like this he really can’t bother to be. Such a tight, soaked, little hole, with your mischievous doe eyes and sweet smiles…teasing him. Always such a cheeky little thing but it all stopped when he got you like this.
The groan that comes out of his mouth is sinful as he feels your walls pulse erratically around him. You’re close.
Grabbing your cheeks, he makes you look at him. The cockdrunk, dazed look on your face inspires something dangerous in him and he grinds his fat tip against that special spot inside you, hissing at the gush of slick that follows.
“Fuck me, that’s it. Y’gonna make a mess huh? Yeah. I know you are…cuz she’s squeezing me so tight”, he whispers hotly against your lips, taking the rough pad of his thumb to wreak havoc against your aching clit. Looking straight into your teary blown eyes as you cry for him.
“Shhh, it’s okay…thatsss it..cum for me sweetness. Let me have it baby”. Joe’s sultry low voice with the way he strums your swollen stuffed pussy makes you orgasm so hard it hurts. Whining and screaming through the almost endless waves of white hot pleasure, you don’t even notice Joe swearing, brows furrowed, biting his lip at the ring of cream around his base. There’s a possibility the whole dorm heard you and by the end of it, you’re boneless.
By the tume you come down, it takes a minute for the change of position to click until you see Joe above you. Smiling, he leans down and kisses the corner of your mouth where you had drooled when he evicted your soul from your body, licking his lips after. (Like this man is a freak and I won’t hear otherwise)
“Wait-! Did you…?”, your hoarse question doesn’t linger in the air too long but Joe’s answer has that heat stirring up again.
“No…but don’t worry. I will, n’ this time, I’ll be on top….because I wanna watch it leak out of ya when I do. S’that okay, baby?” He swears he’s never been this hard in his life as he looks down at you dreamily. Soft, warm, and sated. Fuck.
But you? Are reeling.
Where did he learn how to talk like that?
Nodding weakly, it’s “whatever you want”. Gasping when he smacks the thick head of his tip on your clit, you spread your shaky legs wider. Ready for round 2 and that’s his cue.
Getting between your legs, folding your knees to your chest….
“So don't tap out on me just yet.”
♡︎ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴍᴇ, ᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴅᴏʟʟᴀʀ😌
273 notes · View notes
myownwholewildworld · 22 days
Text
wherever you go (a joel miller’s ff) - chapter 9
Tumblr media
chapter 8 | series masterlist | main masterlist | chapter 10
pairing: outbreak!2003!joel x f!reader. (it's actually 2004 now)
summary: "only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love" ― george elio.
a/n: uhmmmm... yeah... i did tell you guys i love drama, right? well, this chapter has a dangerous amount of angst. i'm sorry?? i really hope you guys like this one, i have put a lot of effort into it 😭 as always, all interactions welcome. thank you all for reading and generally being amazing! xx
warnings: 18+, mdni. angst, angst, ANGST. have i said angst already? discussions of death, suicide and assisted suicide. sarah makes an appearance. soft!joel. lovemaking. there are some "i love you"s thrown around. crying. smut. oral (m and f receiving). masturbation (m and f). creampie. goodbye sex?? if that's even a thing to tag. reader is female, no other description given. reader is mid-late 20s, joel is 37. no use of y/n.  joel’s and reader’s pov.
w/c: ~5.3k.
tags aka the drama wagon (let me know if you want to be added/removed from the list pls!): @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @pedrospurplerain @missladym1981
@fancyyoouu @smolbeanzzz @guelyury @bishtrouille
“Joel, please, I beg you. Don’t do this, please”, Sasha pleaded with him.
She was on her knees, imploring him to spare her life. But he couldn’t do that. She was infected ― she was wearing the proof on her forearm, the bite bleeding shades of red and yellow.
It was just a matter of time before she lost herself, before she was truly gone. He was just being merciful with her, he thought. Ending Sasha’s suffering before it became too great to bear was the right thing to do. She was dead anyway, speeding up the process was lenient of him.
He gripped the gun tighter, his index caressing the trigger. If it was so rightful, why was he hesitating? The barrel kissed her forehead as she shut her eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks, mouthing a silent prayer. Joel noticed a familiar scar on her right cheek ― it had almost faded, but he knew it all too well. He had stroked it many times in the last few months.
His brows furrowed in confusion. Why did Sasha have the same scar you did?
“Daddy? Don’t kill her, please”, Sarah’s voice rang in his ears.
Joel’s attention quickly turned to his daughter. Sarah materialised, standing right there in front of him at arm’s length. She felt so real to him, he thought himself mad. Her bright sad eyes pierced through his resolution. She was as beautiful as he remembered ― curly brown hair, big green orbs, a sweet soft smile, the most soothing voice known to man, to a father.
But her features were torn with sorrow. In fact, her eyes were dotted with thick tears, her lips pursed in a grimace. He felt the urgent need to calm her down, to tell her everything was going to be alright. This time he could protect her. He would. He had to.
Joel knew he would not survive this all over again. It would break him for good, shattering the last remnants of what made him human.
“I have to, baby girl. I need to keep you safe”, his voice faltered, filled with emotion. A knot in his throat so dense he could not even swallow. “I won’t lose you again, baby girl, I can’t.”
“Daddy, no!”, she cried, touching his forearm ― a light, comforting pat that made his skin crawl with nostalgia.
The lump in his throat spread to his chest. An overwhelming sensation threatened to rip his torso apart. Oh, how much did he just want to embrace his Sarah tight, to feel her warmth again, to know such unconditional love one more time. To cry with pure relief, letting go of that daunting feeling that had been haunting him for over a year.
Joel knew he would do anything to protect Sarah. And so he did.
A loud bang ricocheted, his eyes never leaving his daughter’s.
“No, daddy, what have you done?”, she muttered, holding onto his forearm, digging her little fingers in his flesh.
She was weeping uncontrollably now. Joel dropped the gun to the floor, cradling Sarah’s face between his murderous hands. He swept away her tears, and his heart ached with longing.
“What I had to, baby girl. I’m keeping you alive, no matter what the cost”, Joel’s voice was so low, it was almost a whisper.
For the first time in four hundred and fifty-one days, he allowed himself to cry his eyes out. He let go of all the bottled-up emotions, knocking down the walls that contained all the misery and despair that he had felt for so long.
Sarah’s hands wrapped around his wrists, her sobs and his flowing in unison.
“But you’ve killed her, daddy.”
And then she vanished, leaving a trail of warmth on Joel’s fingertips. She was gone.
His heart jolted against his ribcage. Darkness engulfing his senses once again, casting away any feelings he had, leaving him as empty as he ever was.
He composed himself ― something in her tone, in her emphasis in the word “her”, forced Joel to look away from where his daughter had stood a minute before, down to the woman on the ground.
But it wasn’t Sasha. It was you.
You were dead. Because of him.
Grief swallowed him whole. Chewed him, spat him.
Joel startled awake, his heart racing so fast he could feel it pressing against his throat. Panic strangled him, forcing him to swallow the hard lump in his throat. He blinked rapidly, realising he had been crying in his sleep. With one hand, he brushed away the tears as reality set in once again.
He was going to lose you and there was absolutely nothing he could do to prevent it from happening. Your fate had been unfairly sealed. The future he thought he had with you… gone. Joel had allowed himself to dream, dooming you in the process of doing so. He should have known by now that happiness was meant to escape him forever. Joel tainted everything and everyone he touched, leaving a trail of lingering darkness that would eventually catch up with those he marked.
He looked around, for a second forgetting where he was. You both were in a flat on the second floor of an apartment building on East Lake Shore Drive, with views to Lake Michigan. He guessed it was around midnight, a couple of hours after the whole debacle.
Joel barely remembered how you both got here, his memory was hazy, unable to recall much after seeing the bite mark on your wrist. The part of him who was built for this world ―unattached, steadfast, unwavering― took over, guiding you both to safety.
It was weird how he used to space out in those moments of high anxiety. It wasn’t the first time it had happened. He barely remembered the days after Sarah’s death either. The brain fog was so dense it felt like swimming through murky waters.
He shook his head and glanced down. Sitting on the couch, you were laying down on your side, with your head on his lap. Your hands were tucked away under his thigh, your face almost completely leaned against his jeans. One of his hands was buried in your hair ― he massaged your scalp lightly, his other hand resting on your hip.
Joel just wished he could take all of it away. Had he never known you, you would not be in this position. If your paths had never crossed, he was convinced you would have lived a full, happy life. And, as always, he fucking ruined it. Ruined you.
As if his conscience was not tortured enough, little Ava popped in his mind. Another failure, a very grave one. The little girl had unearthed a side of him he thought dead: the longing father.
The one who would worry to death every time Sarah fell to her knees while learning to walk.
The one who felt extremely proud when she took her first steps unaided.
The one whose heart would flutter with anxiety on her first day of school.
The one who spent hours deciding what to get his baby girl for Christmas.
The one who tried baking a cake for her fifth birthday.
The one who trained with her for her first soccer match.
The one who cheered at the top of his lungs every time his baby girl would score a goal.
The one who couldn’t protect her.
The one who hugged her desperately while she took her last breath.
This felt like a second punishment. Joel shouldn’t have had let go of Ava, but what was he supposed to do? Watch you fall in a river full of furious clickers? He couldn’t. He had to choose and chose you. It was fucking wrong, he knew that ― he was so selfish he condemned an innocent toddler without giving her a second thought. Losing you ― this was karma. A twisted payback endorsed by the universe.
You had cried yourself to sleep, caving in to the irrevocable fate that awaited you. Your dreams were besmirched with haziness ― a whirlwind of clickers, people running directionless, Joyce and Ava falling to their demises, death everywhere.
Your heart wept at the memory. Joyce’s blank eyes haunted your dreams, as well as Ava’s small voice, begging her nana to come back from the dead. Life was so unfair you could not wrap your head around it. They were innocent. Joyce was the type of person who would give her everything for everyone ― so thoughtful, attentive, always willing to lend a hand or an ear. She had been a light for you, healing that part of your heart that missed your parents. How much you had wished that your sacrifice would have had worked out. To trade your life for hers. Joyce should be eternal.
And then little Ava… you felt agony just thinking about her reaching out to the darkness below. Her imploring her nana to get back to her, to hold her. Her life cut so short ― it was too cruel.
You had lost too much, too soon, too fast.
When you woke up, your emotions were weirdly in check. Defeated, you understood there was nothing you could do. About Joyce, about Ava, about yourself. The dice had been cast and nothing could change the end result. So you had to accept your destiny and make the most of what little time you had left with Joel.
You momentarily shut your eyes, feeling Joel’s fingertips rubbing your scalp. Swiping your tears, you turned your head ninety degrees to your left, looking up at Joel. He was blankly staring into the distance, lost in his own train of thought. He reminded you of when you two first met and that scared you. You didn’t need to read minds to know what was crossing his.
The worst part about dying was not death itself, but the devastation it left on its wakening. Those left behind had to deal with the drowning grief of losing a loved one ― the sorrow, the regrets, the lost opportunities, the what if’s.
You grabbed his hand to kiss his knuckles. His eyes slowly drifted down to you, stained with affliction and unspent tears. His thumb ghosted your lips, a caress that tugged at your heart. He bowed down to replace his thumb with his mouth, a light peck that tasted of goodbye.
You stroked his jaw when the kiss broke off and reluctantly sat up on the sofa, nestling against his side. He wrapped you with his arm, holding you tight, his chin resting on your crown. Your hand was placed on his chest ― his heart beating steadily, calming your inner panic.
You closed your eyes. You didn’t want to do this, but you were scared out of your mind. You had trusted Joel with your life, so you would trust him with your death too. It was so fucking selfish of you, it made you sick. You had seen what a prolonged death did to people and didn’t want to suffer the same fate. Withering away like a flame on a thunderstorm was not something you wanted to experience. You wanted it to be quick, painless.
You knew it would break him and you hated yourself for it. But fear, as overwhelming as it was, had a tight grip on your ability to think clearly.
“Joel”, you whispered, rubbing his chest. You didn’t dare to glance up, your eyes fixed somewhere in that tiny living room. “Please don’t hate me, but… when my death is near, would you… could you… please… just… put an end to it? To me?”, you wept, tears flowing again. “I know it’s cruel of me to ask this of you, but please understand… I don’t wanna come back as one of those things, I don’t wanna hurt you. Or anyone. I just want to rest knowing I didn’t cause any harm…”
You felt his heart picking up a wild pace under your fingertips. A very long silence ensued, which forced you to look up at him. His jaw was so clenched you could see the muscles straining.
Joel was making a titanic effort to keep his emotions at bay. A world of past demons, of rotten feelings and of secret tears overran his mind. Facing his own death was easier than accepting yours. How could he be a victim of fate, a witness to death and the executioner of it as well? He couldn’t, he didn’t have that many faces ― he just was a simple man whose life got complicated too easy, too fast.
As intricate as his thoughts were, as many atrocities as he had committed in the last year to keep you safe, he detested being the ghoul to those he treasured. You had asked him to be the worst version of himself ― one he did not know if he would ever come back from. Once the afterlife sullied his soul, Joel would lack the strength to wash it off himself. It would forever taint him, marking him as the grim reaper’s lackey.
But what was one more death on his conscience? Your death? He had already branded you for slaughter the moment he landed his eyes on you many moons ago. It was only fair you solicited he finished what he had started, after all.
Ending your suffering before it became too great to bear was the right thing to do.
You were dead anyway, speeding up the process was lenient of him.
If it was so rightful, why was he hesitating?
The irony of his dream would have struck him to his knees had he been standing. If he loved, really loved you, he would not vacillate. He would greet your death compliantly, certain his would quickly follow.
You were a fucking monster for asking that to the man you loved, for laying such a burden on him. How could you be so damn tactless? You knew how he thought of himself, how he believed he spoiled everything he touched. And here you were, reinforcing that idea for him.
Your sobs grew louder, your hand travelling from his chest to his jawline as you straightened your back to reach his cheek so his vacant eyes would meet yours.
“I’m truly sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. I don’t know what overcame me, I just… I’m scared”, you muttered through trembling lips. “I’ll do it myself. Please, forget what I said, I didn’t mean to. I’m really sorry, Joel.”
Joel finally blinked, coming out of his trance. He cupped your chin, fear and grief swirling in his irises. He tilted his head down to place a kiss on your forehead.
“I’ll do it, sweetheart. I’ll do it”, he whispered breathlessly, and you just shattered in his arms.
You embraced him and cried until your eyes stung and ran dry ― until you flushed out such dreadful feelings from your system. Joel held you throughout, stoic and unfaltering, brushing your forehead with his mouth from time to time, whispering reassuring words in your ear.
You had noticed the difference in his voice, as if your request wholly broke him. How you wished you could retract yourself, travel back in time to restore the trust you thought you fractured. “No, I will. I will”, you repeated, inflicting your words with determination, one you didn’t feel.
This wasn’t how you wanted to spend your last hours on earth, lamenting yourself, wasting the little time you had left. This wasn’t you. You needed to show him you loved him, make him forget your sickening petition. A thought formed: you never replied to his confession ― a wrong you could right before you lost your mind to cordyceps.
You stirred in place to uncoil your back, your lips lined up with his. “I love you, Joel Miller. Since the moment I met you, I knew you were the one”, you mumbled with a sad smile before closing off the distance, your mouths crashing in desperate need.
Feeling his hesitance, you insisted with your tongue, stroking his with long brushes until Joel relaxed into your mouth. His hand slipped under your t-shirt, caressing your back, drawing invisible lines on your skin with the light touch of his fingertips.
“I heard you the other night, I thought I dreamt it”, he admitted in a hush when your lips detached.
“The other night, you mean yesterday?”, you teased with a small grin, and he nodded in reply. It did seem like an eternity away. “You didn’t dream it, I said it. I’ve been wanting to say it out loud for a while.”
“Me too, been thinking it for a bit, but didn’t know when it was the right moment, if there was a right moment. And then it felt like that moment was gone, that I was too late”, his tone became sombre as he spoke, your heart shuddering and breaking and healing and crying.
“You didn’t need to say it ― I knew, believe me, I really knew. I’ve known for so long now, before you even realised. I only wanted you to say it when you were ready”, you reassured him, your noses nuzzling.
It was a very little consolation, but you both held onto it.
This time it was Joel who resumed the kiss ― his lips were softer than usual, his mouth more begging than dominating. The caress of his tongue was affectionate, not demanding. You slid your feet from underneath and climbed on top of him, straddling him. You sat on his lap and peppered his jaw with little pecks. He hugged you by your waist, bringing you closer to him. You softly moaned when he trapped your mouth with his again, your crotch flush with his groin. You involuntarily rolled your hips against his, friction awakening your desire.
“I want you to make me feel alive one last time, Joel”, you sighed against the corner of his mouth, your palms against his cheeks.
He stopped and looked at you for a long second, probably debating himself. But whatever doubts crossed his minds, he put them to rest. Sometimes you wished you were a telepath ― Joel was a man of few spoken words, but you knew his inner talk was loud and loquacious.
With his forearms, he pressed your thighs around his waist. Placing his hands on your butt cheeks, he stood up with you in his arms, holding you tight against his body. Joel walked you both to what you assumed was the bedroom. It was quite minimalistic, white walls and spiderwebs decorating the corners. The bed seemed comfy with a very thick mattress and silky bedsheets.
He set you down on the bed before kneeling to undo the laces of his boots, throwing them to a side. Your shoes quickly followed his to the same corner. Joel stood back up and undid his belt, his eyes never leaving yours as you helped him. The unspoken words were loud in your head, neither of you needed to say anything else.
In silence, he undressed, leaving a pile of clothing on the floor. You admired his body ― his broad shoulders, his strong arms, his chiselled pecs, his slimmer waist and softer tummy. You traced the scar on his right hip, the one he got for defending Tommy. Ah, Tommy, another loss. You casted that thought away quickly.
He was gorgeous and he was yours. All yours. You loved this man with such passion, it sometimes startled you. The way he cared for you in all meanings of the word warmed your heart.
You caressed his sides, your fingers wandering to his ass cheeks to push him towards you. You kissed his belly button, his happy trail inviting you down, which you gladly followed. His erection was creeping up but was still soft, so you kneaded his testicles tenderly ― your free hand pumping him unhurriedly, teasing him, while your lips brushed his V line.
You looked up at him with adoring eyes before your tongue rippled around the plump tip. Slurping the precum off his slit without breaking visual contact, Joel tucked your hair away behind your ears and let you do as you pleased at your own pace. Closing your eyes, you took his manhood in your mouth, slathering your saliva on him. His cock was hungering for your touch, weeping, throbbing ― you could feel the heat hardening him under your tender hands and darting tongue. He tasted musky, but also sweet. Your favourite flavour. You heard a deep rumble coming from Joel’s chest as his glans caressed your uvula.
You took him out of your mouth when you felt the pulsation ― he was ready for you, whenever you wanted to take him in in your slick warmth. You slid your tongue across his whole length before leaning backwards to meet his eyes.
You saw lust, but also raw love. Joel motioned his hand in an upward gesture, and you stood up in front of him. Tasting himself in your mouth, he helped you undress completely. When you were both bare naked, Joel hugged you tightly. Oh, how you wished you could stay like that forever, frozen in time.
Joel gently pushed you to bed again, his lips never abandoning yours, and dug a knee on the mattress as you laid down on your back. His body was hovering over yours, his frame covering you.
He showered your neck with pecks and licks while your dewy lashes fluttered like butterflies. A soft, liquid whimper grew in your chest, breaking free. His calloused fingers cupped your breasts, his thumbs ghosting your nipples ― a light touch, electricity thundering down your spine. Your back arched, lifting off the mattress when his thick fingers were replaced with the welcomed wetness of his mouth. He did not linger for long though, set on a downward path.
Joel came off the bed, dragging your hips with him to the edge of the mattress. Knelt before you, you unconsciously parted your legs to make room for him. He marvelled at the sight, the proof of your passion pearling your velvety fold, the core of your pleasure begging to be paid due attention.
With the back of your knees resting on his shoulders, he kissed your mound while his thumb caressed your dripping entrance, circling it tentatively before drowning in it. You gasped at the sweet intrusion. Then his tongue scurried down, licking your clit with a languid, long stroke.
He lapped your creamy slit, gulping your fluids down ― everything you had to offer, he took. His tongue worshipped every crevice in your silky pussy, not even an inch was left unattended ― Joel made sure of it. He alternated between fingering you slowly with his thumb and introducing his tongue in your tight opening, stroking your g-spot the way you liked it. It was too much. The tense knot in your belly melted with no warning, releasing a spurt of lava into Joel’s mouth. You wailed, clutching the bedsheets, gushing for him, only for him, eyes averted.
Like a thirsty man in the middle of the desert looking for an oasis he could drink of, Joel made you come with his tongue over and over again. You lost count of how many times you orgasmed ― your skin pearly with sweat, your cunt overstimulated, your dusky nipples hardened, your limbs shaking, your heart burst with love.
Joel emerged from in between your legs and crawled on top of you as he dragged you to the centre of the king size bed. Holding his weight off you on his elbows, he blanketed your body with his ― his hardness intimately resting against your swollen mound. You slipped a hand between your bodies, your fingertips teasing the head of his column. You pumped him slowly as his mouth invaded yours with lazy strokes.
You bathed his cock in your slick, swiping it on your puffy lips ― drenching him in your arousal. Then you wielded him from the base and broke off the kiss. You wanted to look into his eyes as he possessed you one last time. As he loved you and you loved him back with your whole heart. Guiding his tip to your needy hole, you encouraged him to push it in with your heels on his butt cheeks, never breaking eye contact.
Both of you moaned as his cock found its way to your cervix, kissing it gently. You draped your legs around his waist, taking him in as far as you could house him. The connection you felt to him was eerie, almost unreal. His orbs were transfixed on yours, none of you able to look away. Your mouths were parted in unspoken awe, then he lightly bit your chin to stop himself from groaning like a madman.
You laced his neck with your arms to pull him towards you, your lips crashing as he rolled his hips into you. In, out, in, out ― very slowly, so slowly it just enhanced the intensity of his swaying.
“I love you, Joel”, you husked as his cock dragged along your anterior wall, pulling out to then ripple back into you.
Joel’s thrusts were lethargic, as if he didn’t want the moment to end. “I love you too”, he replied as his hips undulated like waves between your thighs.
Joel kissed the scar on your cheek as you foraged for his mouth. The façades had fallen. There was no roleplay, no dominance nor submission, no “sirs”, no dirty talk, no begging ― none of that. There was only two people showing their love and affection to each other. It was the first time you actually made love.
Because you were head over heels for him. Had been for a long while. And you just knew he loved you to bits, there was no denying that. The overwhelming sensation flooded you, tears welling up and shedding. You cradled his face and realised the apples of his cheeks were soddened too. Both of you were crying your love and your regrets ― your tears mixing with his, wetting your lips with a salty taste that got diluted in the shared dampness of your mouths.
Your heart wept for the time you didn’t have with each other. You hugged him closer to your chest, nipples kissing, when the soft hammering of his pelvis against yours picked up a faster but controlled, smooth pace. Way more intense too, his pulsing cock driving in as far as it could reach.
One of Joel’s tears fell on your neck when he kissed your chin, then slid down and gathered at the centre of your collarbone. His mouth dropped to lick it off your skin, leaving a different type of wet trail behind. You whimpered heavily, his tongue now attending the crook of your neck while Joel’s hand darted down, quickly finding your buttery button and stroking it dextrously.
Your moans grew louder ― your legs gripping tighter around his waist, your nails digging in the skin of his back, your back arching, your mouth open so wide it was an inch away from dislocating.
Joel didn’t contain his passion either, heaving notoriously, his chest rumbling with a deep, guttural growl. His dick was diving in you so smoothly, it even felt mythical. He was throbbing for you, your creaminess cloaking his manhood. He could feel your heartbeat contracting your inner walls every single time, his own pulse drumming in his cock at the same time. Your pulsating sexes were fully synchronised, in complete harmony.
You yielded first. Your overstimulated clit sent the signal across your whole body, a potent wave uprooting a high-pitched shriek off your lungs as you reached the best climax of your life. Your quivering cunt clamped down around Joel’s hot cock, squeezing him uncontrollably ― you could not get hold of your own muscles, they just spasmed around his pounding dick. You felt his manhood twitch violently inside you, announcing his own orgasm ― your pussy heartening his cock to come.
Joel felt his balls tense up, his lower belly contracting so hard it was painful. He was so turned on, a prolonged howl escaped his mouth, cavernous and thundering. His dick writhed in your welcoming hole, his hips stuttering with measured effort. He placed the palms of his hands to each side of your head to lift his torso off you, his hips still waving against yours, and caught a glimpse of your heavenly face: half-lidded teary eyes, O-shaped mouth, your eyebrows relaxed. You looked so damn beautiful, the most beautiful he had ever seen you, so much so his heart tugged with longing, with love, with adoration.
With a painful groan and out of habit, he tried to pull his cock out of you to come outside. But you quickly shook your head no, raising your arms to lace your hands behind his neck, forcing his head down towards you. The heels of your feet pressed against his butt cheeks again, your legs locking around his waist to keep him in the place he needed to be ― inside you.
“Please, Joel, I want to feel you, I need to feel you”, you urged him, his breath mixing with yours, mouths agape.
With such plea, Joel finally let go at the same time he claimed your lips with his, moaning into your mouth. Devouring you, his cum spurted out into your inviting, slick cave, in several waves. He filled you up to the brim, his cock still throbbing, painting your inner walls white. He remained still between your legs, his dick slowly softening inside you, until he finally pulled out, both of you grunting.
You squashed your cunt to keep his warm spent in your pussy for as long as you could.
Joel kissed your cheeks, sweeping away your tears with his lips while your hands cradled his face, your thumbs brushing his away too. You had never seen him cry before. It killed you knowing that he felt so safe with you, he could let his walls down and be himself without any repercussions. His teary brown eyes pulled yours into their orbits ― you were unable to look away.
Joel closed the distance and sweetly kissed you. Again, that heavy, goodbye feeling nested in your chest, squeezing your heart and your throat.
This was goodbye. You would never see him again and that broke your heart into tiny little pieces that could not be glued back together.
Don’t think about it.
Joel laid on his back and you quickly curled up against his chest, hiding your face from him. Silence ensued, each lost in their own thoughts. You pecked his chest while your fingertips lightly traced every line on his tummy.
“Promise me you won’t do anything rash, please. Go look for Tommy after… after I’m gone. Please don’t even consider… following me.” You whispered, slowly looking up at him. “Please.”
His eyes wandered on your face, then he sighed heavily, looking away. “I can’t promise you that, sweetheart.” His orbs slowly locked on yours again, your bottom lip quivering with sadness. “I may or may not consider it, but Death is capricious and, sooner or later, it always comes knocking.”
“I hope it’s later rather than sooner. You deserve happiness, Joel.” Your words, albeit stammering, were sincere.
“This is my happiness, right here with you in my arms. If Death came looking for me tomorrow, I would die a happy man”, he admitted in a whisper.
Your heart exploded at his confession. You laughed and cried at the same time, kissing his jawline. “You do know how to make a girl feel special.”
“That’s because you are.” He shrugged, hugging you closer to his chest.
“I love you ― to the edge of the atlas and back.” Your hand caressed his left cheek, bowing his head towards you so you could capture his mouth.
You made love twice more that night, none of you wanting to fall asleep. You made sure every minute counted, showing and telling each other how much you loved one another.
You also cried together to purge your sorrows. When you thought no more tears could be shed, one of you would prove yourselves wrong, breaking another invisible dam. You both felt vulnerable, but also loved.
Soon enough, dawning colours painted the sky ― shades of red and orange filtering through the curtains, tinting the white walls of the bedroom with warmth.
You sighed, resting your cheek against his pec, feeling heavy and cold. Very cold. Suddenly, you shivered. Joel noticed your trembling, instantly worried. He pressed the palm of his hand against your forehead.
“Honey, you’re burning up.” His voice seemed to be far away.
You felt so drowsy you only managed to hum, “Mhmm?”.
Then you blindly plunged into darkness, unaware of Joel calling your name, panic in his voice.
88 notes · View notes
triplefrontierbabe · 1 month
Text
Pato O’Ward smau
pairing: f! reader x Pato O’Ward
warnings: use of yn
disclaimer: photos from Pinterest and/or Instagram, I take no credit for photos
yourusername
Tumblr media
liked by elbaoward , davidmalukas and 1,790 others
yourusername summer break = chasing around a man child & off road adventures with the girls
view 64 comments
norbidacorgi and give me treats!
↳ yourusername anything for you norbi <3
elbaoward 🤣🤣🤣 sounds about right
davidmalukas sorrows, sorrows, prayers
↳ yourusername 🙏🙏
alexanderrossi poor thing. you, not pato
↳ patriciooward hey 😪
patriciooward guys don’t let her fool you, she’s having a lot of fun with me!
↳ yourbestfriend weird bc i got a text saying you didn’t wanna play mermaids with her 🤨
5patofan5 would it kill her to be grateful once in a while?????
↳ arrowmclarenluvr touch grass
patriciooward
Tumblr media
liked by frosenqvist , hinchtown and 157, 893 others
patriciooward summa break!!!!!!!!!!
view 903 comments
arrowmclaren a well deserved break! ☀️
yourusername “babe does this angle make me look ripped?”
↳ patofan5 not yn outing him 😂😂
norbidacorgi I luv having my dad home
elbaoward maybe next time use sunscreen?
↳ yourusername I tried to tell him 🫠
↳ alexanderrossi he never listens to anyone
kellmoss omg the first pic😍 you cuties!!
↳ yourusername im actually obsessed with it 🥹
indycarlover I’m living for the yn and Pato beach content
indycarwagtea cutest couple???????
yourusername
Tumblr media
liked by kellmoss , vickyschaff and 2,004 others
yourusername chi town🏙️🍕🌳
view 193 comments
yourbestfriend come back home, the kids miss you
↳ yourusername omw
patriciooward wow my hair looks so good
↳ yourusername walk home.
↳ patriciooward 😧😧😧 unprovoked??
↳ davidmalukas you can come stay with me, don’t worry
vickyschaff I want to be you
↳ yourusername only if I can be you 😽
elbaoward my babiesssss I adore you two
patriciooward
Tumblr media
liked by pato_tv_ , logansargeant and 183, 783 others
patriciooward summer break randomness in Chicago I guess
view 2, 784 comments
alexanderrossi this guy can not pass by a mirror without taking a selfie
davidmalukas no visit???
frosenqvist Chicago pizza >>
conordaly22 thanks for the update 🙏
yourusername I was not prepared for that last pic… 🥵
↳ yourbestfriend girl get up!!!
↳ yourusername girl I’m trying!!!
↳ patosmumberonefan girl I don’t think any of us were prepared tbh
↳ wagindycarupdates oh to be yn……
yourusername don’t mind me still lurking
↳ number05ftw she just like us fr 😭🙏
yourusername
Tumblr media
liked by arrowmclaren , patoowardshop and 2, 794 others
yourusername when he says he wants ice cream, you get him ice cream 🍦
view 290 comments
elbaoward always gotta keep the baby happy
↳ yourusername you really aren’t wrong 😭
yourbestfriend sorry I’m just mesmerized by your hair
↳ yourusername would you believe it that pato did it?!
kellmoss second pic looks straight out of a fairy tale
↳ yourusername makes me wanna wear a princess dress and frolick
patitofan I love how yn always posts the goofiest pics of pato
indy500islyfe Indycar driver diet where??
patriciooward
Tumblr media
liked by stingrayrobb , kyle_kirkwood and 174, 893 others
patriciooward I love ice cream
view 679 comments
yourusername no pic creds? wow.
↳ alexanderrossi wow pato
↳ kellmoss pato you always credit your girl
lungaardofficial got enough to share?
frosenqvist got enough toppings?
↳ patriciooward never
arrowmclaren pato 🤝 ice cream
norbidacorgi save me some!
f1indycarwags so glad I saw yn’s post for the other pic
↳ motorsportwaggossip me too lmao
↳ patoupdatesss wait she’s private now 😩
↳ papayalover050607 someone send it to me I have to see it plzzz
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ ౨ৎ ⋆。˚ ౨ৎ ⋆。˚
Click here to view my Masterlist
౨ৎ ⋆。˚ ౨ৎ ⋆。˚ ౨ৎ ⋆。˚
taglist: @bernelflo @ifyouaintfirstyourelastt @f1updates4you
95 notes · View notes