#sooo Last year was a bit of a tough year for me

[d3lly1000]

Happy New Year, everyone!!!! 🤍🤍

I’ve been away these past few days, but thank you so much for being here! It’s been less than a year since I rejoined the Sonic community, and I’m still very grateful for the warm welcome I received.

I hope you all have a great start to the year! 🤍

[mclqren]

THE LECLERC CHRONICLES ★ F1 GRID

PAIRING ✦ charles leclerc x fem!younger sister!reader ; f1 grid x fem!leclerc!reader

SUMMARY ✦ you're the younger sister of charles leclerc, and your relationship with the rest of the f1 grid has the internet going crazy [ SMAU ]

WARNINGS ✦ cursing

REQUESTED ✦ here!

NOTES ✦ reader is 22 years old, and the youngest leclerc sibling. this one is a bit shorter than my other smaus, sorry for that! the fc i've used is lexi jayde, but feel free to picture whoever you want! my requests are open so feel free to leave a request :)

SERIES ✦ the leclerc chronicles masterlist ; next part

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liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 776,319 others

yourusername it's tough work being the hottest leclerc 🤷‍♀️

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user1 UGH SHE'S SO PERFECT

user2 my fav leclerc sibling!!

charles_leclerc the caption 🤔🤔

yourusername am i lying though?? 😘

arthur_leclerc i think you are!

yourusername i think it's just you (& charles) who think that!

landonorris so what's the crown for then?

yourusername because im a queen. i need no other reason 😊👑

landonorris self proclaimed queen or-?

yourusername im queen of the grid, now bow down, bitch!

alex_albon you don't even drive-???

yourusername stop it rn or i'll tell charles to ram into both of you on the track 😊❤️❤️

georgerussell who are the flowers from 🤨🤨

yourusername my man, who else?

georgerussell okay be honest now y/n...who are they from.

yourusername and if i told you ur girlfriend then what 🤷‍♀️

carmenmmundt only woman i need 😘😘

georgerussell WOAHHH SLOW YOUR ROLL GUYS

carlossainz55 loving the sunglasses, y/n! 😎😎

yourusername awww you type like such a dad but ur forgiven bc ur my fav ferrari driver 💗

charles_leclerc helloo i'm your older brother??

yourusername hey, i'm still allowed to have my favorites!

liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and 801,211 others

yourusername bahrain weekend woohooo!! TEAM LECLERC (third slide is for motivation ❤️)

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user3 THE THIRD SLIDE IM WHEEZING

user4 SHE'S SO FUCKING FUNNY

charles_leclerc the last slide??? im telling maman ☹️

maxverstappen1 maybe you can beat me with that motivation!

yourusername he speaks the truth charlie soz 🤷‍♀️ AND PLS DONT TELL MAMAN IM SORRY

francisca.cgomes ur sooo 😍😍

yourusername leave pierre for me rn. im richer i swear

pierregasly huh?

yourusername see, not a thought behind those eyes! run away w me bbg 😘

francisca.cgomes okay you've convinced me, give me ten minutes x

yourusername HAAA GOT UR GIRL GASLY

landonorris the coat in bahrain weather??

oscarpiastri how is she surviving??

yourusername a girl does what a girl has to do 🤷‍♀️ maybe you should both take fashion tips from me anyway xx

charles_leclerc you aren't being rude are you y/n?!

yourusername noooo!! im offering friendly advice 😊

lance_stroll i wonder who bought you the first shirt...🤨

yourusername my rich nepo baby friend, thanks again boo 😘

lance_stroll wowww you're literally a nepo baby sister idk what ur on about

yourusername im actually famous for my incredible looks & witty humor, not my fugly brothers

charles_leclerc why are you so rude to us ☹️

yourusername it comes from a place of love 💗

logansargeant i wonder whose sunglasses you're wearing?!

yourusername idk i just found them!!

yourusername

( caption one: the third wheel lifestyle is NOTTT for the weak 😔 + tags | caption two: yeah i took this photo asw. can they stop being so fucking happy please it's making me depressed 😔 )

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly, and 781,221 others

tagged francisca.cgomes

yourusername who needs a man when you have kika 😘 ( ps no clue who the other people in the last pic were, but whatevs )

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user5 the y/n lifestyle is something i needddd

user6 SO REAL FOR THIS

user7 outfitsss!! 😍

francisca.cgomes love you 😘

yourusername LOVE YOU MORE 💗💗

landonorris what on earth were you drinking

yourusername idk but it was fizzy and orangey and it was yum

alex_albon orangey isn't a word ❌

yourusername ACTUALLY ☝️ it is. sooo idk what ur on about mate

pierregasly are you even of age to be drinking

yourusername IM THE SAME AGE AS UR GF??? ur just jelly she prefers me to you

pierregasly ☹️☹️

logansargeant the winnie the pooh shirt 🔥

yourusername do americans even know winnie the pooh...

logansargeant clearly??

charles_leclerc how much did you have to drink

yourusername none of ur concern brother!

liked by yourusername, georgerussell63, and 1,002,665 others

tagged yourusername

landonorris y/n's signature pose: hands under the chin (she forced me to post this please come save me guys)

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user8 SHE'S SOOO ICONIC

user9 CAPTION LOOLLL LOVE Y/N

yourusername live laugh love me!!

alex_albon is it now...

yourusername SHUT UP ALBONNN IT IS

yourusername guys the caption is a liee i swear he just loves me 💗

landonorris urm who told you that mate

yourusername shut up or i'll send you back to the basement 😁 no one cares enough to save you

georgerussell63 carmen's looking over my shoulder and says y/n's a cutie

yourusername TELL CARMEN I LOVE HER AND TELL HER TO COME OVER TONIGHT 😘😘

pierregasly are you just after everyone's girlfriend then?

yourusername yup! single life = hoe life, @/alex_albon lily's next 😘

liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri, and 800,219 others

yourusername hey alexa, play art deco by lana del rey ( 📸 @/arthur_leclerc )

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user10 SHE LISTENS TO LANA?

user11 SHE'S ONE OF US FR

user12 the dress wooowwww

charles_leclerc when did you take these 🤨

yourusername don't worry about it 💗

arthur_leclerc we had tons of fun without you ❤️❤️

yourusername ARTHUR DON'T BE MEAN (it's true)

charles_leclerc ☹️☹️☹️

lilymhe 😍😍

yourusername LOVE YOU LILS 💗

yourusername but also ops on leaving alex for me...just for research purposes

alex_albon Y/N STOP IT SHE'S MY GF

yourusername leave me alone im single and sad :(

lance_stroll did i not buy you that dress for christmas

yourusername yes you did!! thanks again lance it was a LOVELY investment 😘

yourusername

( caption one: guess where i am!! 🇦🇺 | caption two: yeah yeah the flag gave it away whatever look at my new best friends 🦒 )

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 833,331 others

yourusername aussie aussie aussie... (australians finish the chant)

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user13 she's so perfect

user14 wait is she charles' sister??

user15 yup!! she's the youngest of the leclerc siblings

oscarpiastri coming from an australian...no 🧡

yourusername lucky for me ur not the only australian i know...so!

danielricciardo OI OI OI 🇦🇺🇦🇺

yourusername @/oscarpiastri LOOLLLL POINT MADE

oscarpiastri DANIEL WE'RE MEANT TO BE AUSSIE BUDDIES WHY WOULD YOU BETRAY ME

danielricciardo THE CHANT WAS CALLING TO ME I CANT HELP IT

charles_leclerc FORZA FERRARI

carlossainz55 ❤️❤️❤️

yourusername idk red's not really my color...might have to step into the mclaren paddock next time to see if orange suits me better

charles_leclerc as my sister you can't fraternise with the enemy

yourusername yeah but y/n leclerc does whatever she pleases and right now she wants to wear an orange jacket 🤷‍♀️

landonorris *papaya, not orange

yourusername yeah yeah pls give me a vip paddock pass for japan thank you lan 😘🫶

georgerussell63 the first picture??

yourusername i dropped my ice cream and my WONDERFUL brother decided to capture the moment instead of comforting me ☹️

charles_leclerc it was so funny you just had to be there

liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, and 872,339 others

tagged charles_leclerc, carlossainz55

yourusername FERRARI 1-2 I KNOW THAT'S RIGHTTT!! PROUD OF MY BROTHER(S) (and little lando norris congrats on 3rd 😘)

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user16 THE CAPTIONNN BROTHERS IM CRYING

user17 the way she said in a podcast once that carlos being in her life was like having ANOTHER older brother makes me cry its so sweet

user18 FERRARI IS MY RED FLAG YESSS 🚩🚩

charles_leclerc rare post of you being proud of me?

yourusername it's mainly for carlos...but i'm proud of you too i guess!

charles_leclerc but i'm your brother??

yourusername idk ur both my brothers in my eyes 💗💗

carlossainz55 te amo y/n! ❤️

logansargeant embracing your inner cowboy, i see! very american of you 🤠

yourusername RAHHH WHAT IS A KILOMETRE 🦅🦅🦅

lance_stroll nurse, she got out again

yourusername SHUT UP LANCELOT ur just jealous that i prefer america to canada!! ❤️

landonorris thanks for the caption y/n, but are you not looking for a way out of the ferrari paddock...🤨🤨

yourusername unfortunately mr norris i have to be a supportive big sister on days like today, where my dear brother has done an exceptional job at racing. i hope you understand, and i offer you my deepest condolences ❤️

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might make a p2 to this idk :)

[lecsainz]

Can u do any kind of luke imagine with maybe a daughter of hades:p

˒ ⌕ DID YOU EAT, TODAY?

parings: luke castellan x hades!reader

an: this was my first piece that my sister liked? I'm sooo happy because she's picky, and I usually have to beg her to read anything I write. yes, I know it's pathetic, but I usually don't think my writing is good, and I don't think you guys will like it. I have a bit of a validation-seeking complex (mirroball girl here 😭

summary: where, after 18 years of surviving alone, you finally arrive at camp half-blood, discovering you're a child of hades. adimist it all, a hermes' boy might find himself perhaps falling for you.

( my last work || my last work for riodanverse || go to main masterlist )

The camp was bustling with activity, but for you, the chaos of your newfound identity as a demigod and a daughter of Hades was still settling in. The moment you were claimed upon entering the camp, it felt like your entire world had shifted. As the campers dispersed for their activities, you sought solace by the lake, needing a moment to process the overwhelming revelations.

Luke, having noticed your absence from the group, made his way to the lake with a small cupcake in hand. Blueberry, your favorite. He approached cautiously, recognizing the turmoil on your face. The daughter of Hades, a complex puzzle of emotions and powers.

"Hey there," Luke greeted, sitting down beside you. "Did you eat today?"

You looked up, your eyes still reflecting the confusion and vulnerability that came with the newfound knowledge of your divine parentage. The mere question, though simple, struck a chord within you, resonating with a sense of care that you hadn't expected.

"I... I didn't really feel like it." you admitted, your voice betraying the uncertainty.

Without another word, Luke handed you the cupcake, and the corners of his lips lifted into a reassuring smile. "Well, you should. It's blueberry – your favorite, right?"

Surprised, you glanced at the cupcake, realizing that somehow, amidst all the chaos, Luke had remembered your preference. A small, genuine smile formed on your face as you took the cupcake. "Thank you."

Taking the cupcake, you managed a small smile. The gesture was simple, yet it carried an unspoken understanding. You hesitated for a moment before taking a bite, savoring the sweetness that contrasted with the bitter reality you were grappling with.

Luke watched you quietly, and when you finally met his gaze, he reached over to wipe away a stray tear that had escaped your eye. It was a gentle touch, one that conveyed more comfort than words ever could.

"You know, being a demigod is tough, especially in the beginning," he began, his tone gentle. "But you're not alone in this. We're a family here, weird as it may be."

You chuckled, feeling a hint of warmth amidst the emotional storm. "Yeah, a family of demigods with divine parent issues."

Luke chuckled with you. "Exactly. And you've got powers from the Underworld, which is pretty cool if you ask me."

Your laughter echoed by the lake, and Luke couldn't help but feel a warmth spreading within him. He looked at you, your smile contagious, and a goofy grin formed on his face. In less than 48 hours, everything you did seemed to become his favorite thing.

"See? I knew blueberry cupcakes were the way to go," Luke teased, nudging you playfully.

As you enjoyed the cupcake, the night air became a canvas for the unspoken. Luke's gaze lingered on you, studying your features. The flicker of vulnerability in your eyes and the subtle playfulness of your smile sparked something in him. His mind wrestled with conflicting thoughts. The prophecy and his allegiance to Kronos felt like a weight on his shoulders, yet the simple act of being there for you seemed to defy the inevitable.

Luke couldn't help but think he was treading on dangerous ground. The more he got to know you, the more he realized that maybe, just maybe, there were things worth fighting for beyond the plans of gods and Titans.

Caught in his own internal struggle, he locked eyes with you. His expression shifted between uncertainty and an undeniable connection that was forming against all odds.

And then, as if a realization hit him, you blushed, looking away. The daughter of Hades, powerful and enchanting, now bashful under his gaze. A small smile played on Luke's lips, acknowledging the unexpected turn of emotions.

"Stop," you said, your voice a blend of amusement and a blush that colored your cheeks.

"I can't help it," Luke responded, a mischievous glint in his eyes. He made no effort to hide his amusement, which only intensified your embarrassment.

A playful slap on his arm was your immediate response. "Seriously, cut it out."

Luke chuckled, the sound resonating in the tranquil night. "Alright, alright. I'll behave... for now."

"Hey, Castellan! We're heading out. You coming?" The moment was interrupted by a group of Hermes cabin members calling for Luke. As he got up to join them, he glanced back at you. "You coming?"

He extended his hand towards you, a gesture so simple yet filled with unspoken invitation. With a slight hesitance, you placed your hand in his, and together you walked away, fingers intertwined.

The children of Hermes exchanged smirks, whispering amongst themselves as they watched Luke and you leave the lakeside. One of them winked at Luke, teasingly remarking, "Looks like someone's got a soft spot."

Luke shot back with a grin, "I don't know what you're talking about."

He glanced at you, a sly smile playing on your lips radiating a warmth that ignited a turmoil within him. In that moment, a realization struck Luke like a lightning bolt – perhaps you were the unforeseen obstacle in Kronos' grand plan. As he stared at you, the idea that his growing feelings for you could complicate the titan's scheme loomed over him, and for the first time, Luke Castellan felt the weight of a dilemma he hadn't anticipated.

[tetsuskei]

synopsis: kuroo fathoms how his childhood has affected his life growing up into adulthood, and ultimately fatherhood

notes: reupload from last year. actually get to uploaded on mother’s day. daughters have curly hair (based of my hair kinda). self indulgent. for context, reader have two daughters named akira (7) and sora (4).

work count: 2.5k

warnings: tough family relations, angst, fluff

mother's day is a strange day for kuroo tetsurō.

he never grew up close to his mother, his only memories being from when he was younger than six. they were hazy.

most of the memories unfortunately surround his father and mother arguing—whether that was somewhere off nearby or being heard from through the walls.

in the past, with the little memories he had of his mother, he tried not to think so badly of her.

but when he had reached out to her a number of years later, he was met with an unfortunate sight. she had moved on from kuroo and his father—starting a brand new life with a new husband, and also a new child. a daughter. a half sibling he hadn't known about.

he hasn't talked to his mother since then.

but now mother's day is also full of blessings and happiness for kuroo, too. because he has you, of course. the best mother to his children.

he had strictly told his assistant to make sure he had no work on mother's day. he always tried to work a little overtime (whether it was his will or not) but needed to be sure that nothing would interfere with this day.

you're luckily, not the lightest sleeper, but it will only be a matter of time before you would realize kuroo isn't in bed. which is why he tactfully grabbed his last worn suit jacket and placed it over his pillow for you to hold.

that would be able to stave you off for awhile.

his next step is to wake up your girls. he had discussed with them the plan for mother's day, which included making you breakfast and providing you with your gifts, and of course spending time with you.

he just forgot to factor in two small things: getting them awake and dressed.

"rise and shine my sweet angels." he softly coos, abruptly opening up the blinds for light.

the youngest, sora, sleepily squirms in her bed, rubbing her eyes (one's that match her father's) and squints.

"there she is!" he cheers, coming over to plant kisses on his daughter's face. he lifts her in his arms, swinging her a bit. "good morning, sweetheart."

"papa, stop!" she giggles, trying to avoid his lips.

he frowns, pausing, "do you not love me?"

her eyes—the same warm hazel as his—widen with shock. "of course, papa!"

kuroo beams, resuming his kiss attack, "good, because i love you sooo much. let's try to get your sister up, kay?" he hums, sora nodding before hopping out of his arms to jump on top of her sibling.

akira, the eldest, has always been a grumpy sleeper—he often left you to wake her up because, well, frankly put: kuroo is scared of his own daughter and her wrath.

"up! wake up, 'kira!" sora jumps on top of her sister, shaking her.

there's a small sound of noise as kuroo approaches his eldest daughter's bedside. "looks like someone is awake after all." he manages to find her face in her bundle of sheets and laughs at how much she looks like you when she's grumpy. "good morning, princess."

"...i'm not awake." akira mumbles, rolling over.

he sits for a moment, and thinks of the one thing that he's best at.

scheming.

"oh, well i guess if you're not awake, you won't be able to get any yummy pancakes for breakfast, will you? it's a shame because they're your favorite—chocolate chip. sora, mommy, and i will just eat them all and celebrate mother's day without you, then..." he says sadly, faking a pout.

akira sits up straight, glaring at her father. "you wouldn't dare."

he smirks, "i would." he pats her head, kissing her nose. "come on kiddo, time to get up."

she doesn't seem convinced until it registers in her mind what he said earlier, "mother's day!"

"momma day!" sora cheers, springing out of bed. kuroo catches her in his arms, hushing her softly.

he grunts as he squats down to their level, but beckons akira to him.

"we're going to play the quiet game, okay? your mom is still asleep right now and we don't want to wake her up yet to ruin the surprise. so i need you two to stay quiet. can you two do that for me?" he asks.

the two nod with enthusiasm, giggling as they rush off to get teeth brushed and ready. he helps them get their outfits out while they do so.

getting them dressed was only half the battle, now the real battle was taming their hair.

"oh god..." he grumbles, staring at the sight in front of him.

both of your daughters had a hair type similar to yours (thankfully) but that means that they also inherited the unruliness of their father's hair.

he's watched you do their hair, marveled at the way that your hands moved skillfully to create whatever updo they wanted.

"okay tetsurō, we can do this." he hypes himself up in the mirror, just like before his pitches for his job.

he starts with sora, who requests 'piggies' (pigtails).

"i'm forgetting something..." he mumbles, looking around. but after searching for god knows how long he moves on.

"no!" there's a yelp and akira smacks her dad's hand away from her sisters head.

he blinks, "what?"

"papa, you can't brush without the water." sora says, handing him a spray bottle.

it suddenly clicks for him. "oh, you're right. thank you, darlings." he kisses the top of their heads.

after finishing his handiwork he adds ribbons to her hair. not the best but honest work.

he gives akira 'bunnies' (buns), and before he knows it, he's done.

getting down to the kitchen and making breakfast was the final step.

tetsurō likes to think he's a decent cook. he pales in comparison to you, but pancakes can't be that hard to make, right?

"oops," sora mumbles, knocking over the pancake mix. it falls onto the ground, but part of it also lands on her sister.

"girls," kuroo says sternly, hands on his hips.

they instantly stop, freezing.

there's a frown on his face, and it makes the two of them shiver. "if you keep that attitude up, neither one of you will get pancakes. sora, you're going to have to clean up the mess you made, and akira i need you to help your sister get the broom since she's too small for it. do you both understand?"

"yes, sir." they say in unison, moving to complete their tasks.

he smiles, voice gentle again, "thank you."

they do as told, and while they clean up, he's able to get breakfast going. he gives them minimal tasks (ones that don't involve a mess).

"alright, why don't you guys try the pancakes to make sure they're yummy enough for mommy."

"oh!" akira scrambles over, ready to take a bite.

unfortunately her sister swoops in, stealing the fork and eating the food.

akira glares, grumbling, "thief!"

sora quickly flees from her sister, running around the island.

kuroo starts to call after them, "hey—"

"sounds like you guys are having fun all without me." the sound of your voice alerts all three of them to you, standing sleepily in the opening of the doorway.

the sound of your entrance makes your girls run to you, and you don't hesitate to embrace them in your arms.

you stand back up straight, holding up your husbands clothes, "did you really try to replace yourself with your suit jacket?"

"you said my cologne smells nice, so—" he mumbles, padding over to you like a child before taking your face in his hands, "you're not supposed to be up right now, by the way."

you laugh, "i won't lie, it worked for a minute. then i realized how cold and soft everything was."

"are you calling me hard? like a rock?" he jokes.

you poke his stomach, "with all this muscle, yeah."

"i'll take that as a compliment, then. happy mother's day, sweetheart." he smiles, kissing your forehead before leaning down to kiss you on the lips.

there's a noise of disgust, and you look at your two daughters who are gagging.

"he has cooties, momma!" sora whines.

you laugh, "i'm sorry, girls. but your daddy's cooties are my favorite."

3:45 p.m.

on mother's day, tetsurō likes to take time to focus on his oba-san. he always brings her, her favorite flowers. today he brings along his girls while you went off to brunch with your own mother.

"you're doing a great job." his grandmother smiles sweetly at him.

"huh?" he looks up, startled by her comment, he looks away from his daughters.

"you're doing well, tetsurō. stop worrying so much." she looks off at his daughters playing, "you're raising two beautiful, respectable young girls there. you and your wife should be proud."

"ahh, is it that obvious?" he laughs, scratching the back of his head, blushing red. it scares him how much that woman can read him like a book. there's five people in his life who can do that and he wonders if it's five too many. but it never will be.

"well, i did learn from the best, after all." he smiles, holding her hand. it's rare and few nowadays that he can break down his barriers and become vulnerable (with anyone besides you, of course). but he will always be his oba-san's tetsu-chan.

it's a blessing and a gift for his girls to see their great grandmother, he thinks. not many people can do that.

6:04 p.m.

"i hope you're proud of yourself, tetsu-kun."

kuroo lastly visits kenma's mother, the latter had already been by earlier and is not present at the moment due to his different schedule.

he sits up, "proud of...?"

"your abilities as a father." kozume-san smiles, "you've always looked out for others, that was evident with our kenma. so i have no doubt that you turned out to be such a great father. you and your wife are doing amazing."

he quietly says thank you, pausing as he thinks and ruminates over a thought.

"do you think things could've been different?"

the woman looks up, understanding his intended meaning. if kenma's perception came from anyone, it's his own mother.

"you mean, if your mother was present?"

he nods, quiet.

"well, certainly different," she starts, "but you've grown up fine as you are now. so it's not to say you didn't need a mother—but you at least have mother figures."

"as long as i'm around and i'm sure your grandmother, as well as your wife, you will always have someone there to support and cherish you."

he blinks back tears and smiles, "thank you."

9:32 p.m.

kuroo grimaces, staring at the contact.

he'd been pacing for the past fifteen minutes, conflicted over what he should do.

thumbs move over the screen before he can even think about what he's doing and suddenly the tone dial is in his ear. he's never had his heart beat so fast before—not during a volleyball match, or an important exam, or a job interview.

he feels like he's on fire with nerves. this might be the hardest thing he's ever done in his life.

voicemail.

he opens his mouth to say something, but the words won't come out. he feels choked up, not knowing what to do. wondering why the right words won't come out. he's a man of suaveness and eloquence. it's in the job title, so why is he blanking right now?

but this is not a job, this is real life.

he hangs up, not knowing what to say. he's frustrated with himself for now as many thoughts swirl his mind. he doesn't know how to untangle them and organize them in a way that makes sense.

kuroo doesn't sense your presence when you walk in the room, and that's how you know somethings wrong. it had been a long day and you barely had any time to yourselves and more importantly to check in with him.

you place your hand on his arm, gently squeezing him. "tetsu, what's wrong? what's bothering you?" you hold his face in your hands, eyes scanning over the small creases in his face.

he runs his thumb over your soft skin. quiet as he gathers his thoughts.

"...am i a terrible father for keeping the girls away from my mother?" he asks, looking at you.

you're silent for a good while, and he worries that you'll respond with rage, maybe even mild resentment. he doesn't know if he can handle that.

"that's ultimately your choice, tetsurō. it's not my right or place to force you to reconcile with your mother for the sake of our children."

"i mean, don't you have some right as the mother of my children?" he points out, "they'll wonder in the future about her. i know that for sure."

"'ro, you do it because you want to. not because you feel like you have to." you say, giving him a smile. "besides, they love their hii obasan and my mother very much. they have plenty of people in their lives that make sure they are loved and make it well known."

"i don't know what you have going on between you and your mother, but whenever you're ready to share the full story, i will be here."

and so he unloads the heavy burden he had been carrying with him for years, feeling his chest tighten at times as he recalls events. you can tell he's trying his best to remain impassive, but you hold him tightly, hoping he knows you're there for him and you aren't going anywhere.

once he finishes, it's eerily quiet. you both don't say anything for a moment.

"it's okay to cry, tetsu." you murmur against his forehead. "you don't have to act like you're okay all the time for other people's sake. think of yourself for once."

he relaxes at your words, inhaling sharply and closing his eyes. you feel his tears stream down his face and wipe gently, reaching over the bedside to dab his eyes away with tissues.

"you're...you're right. that's the one thing that matters most to me. growing up, i always felt sometimes that the adults get lost in their own worlds and forget about the children." he laughs, running his hand over his face.

"so you don't want them to feel alone." you say, grabbing his hand. there's a silent understanding as you recall your own childhood. it wasn't a bad one, but that doesn't dismiss the turmoil that was trudged through. "and we won't let that even happen."

"yeah." he says, closing his eyes.

"and you're not alone either," you add, "we do things as a team, remember that."

"i'm very thankful to have a mother of my children be someone as angelic as you." he hums, kissing your forehead, cheeks, and nose.

suddenly, his phone lights up and you both stare at it in silence. the name reads 'don't pick up!'.

kuroo takes an exhale, picking up the device. mind swimming with thoughts and anxiousness as his thumb hovers the screen.

he answers.

[wintfleur]

🪷 hugging them tight without saying any words when they're having a hard time, with luke Hughes! his older sister and he just needs his sisters comfort especially after how the devils have played and how tired luke has looked

౨ৎ Ice cream and much-needed hugs

﹕─┈ pairings ( Luke Hughes x older sister! reader )

°. — summary ( Luke’s been having a tough time, and his big sister just wants to cheer him up ! )

°. — details ( g; little bit of angst, some fluff. w; none that I know of wc; 2.2k )

﹕─┈ prompt ~ hugging them right without saying any words when they’re having a hard time

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( LUKEY AHHH MY LOVE ! I love Luke sm if you guys didn’t know !!! I love writing sibling dynamics so muchhhh so thank you for sending the wonderful request !!! I absolutely loved writing it, I really tried to make it angsty but i think I’m terrible at writing angst, I’m sorry if the ending is kinda rushed, I was struggling sooo bad with the dialogue . . . also I of course had to add the love of my Like Brock boeser in it because like DUHHH I am so down for writing more for a older Hughes sister, I’m thinking she’s like 25??? I really hope you guys love it !!! Let me know if you want me to write more for older sister Hughes! Please don’t be a silent reader lovely’s !!! )

1k celly masterlist main masterlist nhl masterlist

There were a lot of upsides that came with being the oldest sibling, there were of course a lot of downsides too . . . but you chose to ignore those and focus on the upsides. Like being able to stay up later while your brothers had to go to sleep, having a good sense of leadership and responsibility, being able to read your brothers like a picture book. 

So, you knew right away that something was wrong with your youngest brother as you watched him play in the last period. You could see it clearly in his demeanor and the way he was skating, he was starting to overthink things, he had gotten into his own head. You of course had seen the way the public and media was shitting on your brother because he's made a few bad plays, and it broke your heart to see how defeated he looked sitting on that bench. 

Jack had voiced his worries about Luke to you over the phone a few days ago when you were out with Quinn and your boyfriend brock. Even with hundreds of miles between you and Luke you could tell something was bothering him, that's why your planned trip to visit your younger brothers this weekend was even more meaningful. 

You were leaning against the wall as you waited for your brothers to leave the locker room, your focus was down on your phone as you texted your boyfriend. A smile on your lips, you missed him dearly even though you have only been gone for almost two days. “Sis!” you heard the familiar sound of jack's voice call your name. You look up from your phone and smile as Jack rushes over to you and pulls you into a tight hug. 

“You played so well jack” You mumbled into his neck, cursing at the curse of being the oldest but the shortest. Jack smiles and gives you one more squeeze before letting go and taking a step back, even though they lost he wasn't going to let that bring him down from the fact that you watched him play in person for the first time in a few months.

 “Thank you, luke should be out soon, he's just being a little hard on himself” Jack sighed as he glanced back at the locker room entrance, there was only so much he could say to let luke know that he's doing okay. You let out a sigh and nodded, already getting an image of a pouty luke. Your eyes lit up with an idea, as a memory from years ago popped up in your mind. You smile at Jack as you ask “Do you think you can get a ride home? And can I have the keys to your truck?” 

“Uh yeah why?” Jack questioned with a raised brow as he pulled out his keys from his front pocket and handed them to you. You smiled gratefully and grabbed the keys and slid them into your front pocket with your lip gloss. “I have an idea on how to cheer luke up.” 

“Well good luck, cause I can't handle a grumpy luke anymore '' Jack jokes as he pats you on the shoulder, happy that you were now here to save him from the grumpy luke. You roll your eyes and cross your arms over your chest as you look at jack “I remember saying the same thing about you.” 

“Have fun! I'm gonna go catch up with nico "Jack grins as he chooses to ignore your words, placing a quick kiss to your forehead before rushing off down the hallway, turning to look at you quickly and shouting out an ‘i love you’ before turning the corner and leaving your sight. You look forward just in time to see Luke walk out of the locker room, well more like trudge. His steps were heavy, and you can see the exhaustion on his face. His shoulders were sagged as he carried his backpack, he was changed out of his suit and into some sweats and a hoodie. He looked like a sad cat. When Luke noticed you, his heavy steps turned into long strides as he moved towards you. 

Before you could open your mouth to greet your brother, he was throwing his arms over shoulders and nestling his head in the crook of your head, for a much-needed hug. Your eyes widened at how tight Luke was holding you, but you close your eyes and wrap your arms around your little brother, softly rubbing his back with one of your hands. Luke closed his eyes and tried to shut off his mind as he felt himself melt into the comfort and safety of your arms. 

You rested your chin on his shoulder as you whispered, “You, okay?” you felt him nod yes but the both of you knew he was lying. Luke let out a deep breath and reluctantly pulled away from the hug when his back was starting to hurt from leaning down for so long. You smiled up at him, brushing some of his curls out of his face as he asked, “Where's jack?” 

“Oh, he's getting a ride home with nico, so come on lukey I'm taking you out tonight!” You excitedly pull-out Jack's keys and wave them while your other hand is grabbing Luke's arm and dragging him along you as you make your way down the hallway. Luke gave you an unimpressed look even though on the inside he was excited to spend more time with you “I’m not old enough to go bar hopping.” 

“Is that really all you think I do in Vancouver?” You gasped dramatically as you pretended to be hurt from his words. You have one embarrassing experience when you go bar hopping, and now that's all anyone remembers, you think with a roll of your eyes. Luke felt the corner of his lips lift into a smile at your dramatics, Jack definitely got that from you. 

“Besides I'm a good big sister, I wouldn't provide my underage brother with alcohol, at least in public” you joked as you wrapped your arm around Luke's, holding on tight. Luke chuckles and slips his hand into the front pocket of his hoodie, comforting silence coming across them as they make their way to Jack's truck. 

“Need help? '' Luke asked sarcastically as he put on his seatbelt, his eyes on you as you struggled slightly to get into the truck. You gave him a quick glare before closing the door and putting on your seatbelt, quickly starting the truck, wanting to leave the arena before the traffic got even worse. You turned up the volume on the radio, an unfamiliar country song filling up the silent car. Luke let out a heavy sigh and relaxed into the seat, looking out the window and all the passing lights. 

The car ride to your choice of destination was filled with mostly silence between you and Luke, just enjoying the music and the faint sound of the world around them. You could see that Luke had a lot on his mind and you didn't want to pressure him into talking about it, so you stayed quiet, knowing that he would tell you when he's ready. Luke couldn't help but replay every single one of his mistakes he's made in the past few games, remembering every tweet he saw from disappointed ‘fans’. 

Luke could feel himself become more upset and discouraged the more he thought about it, so Luke quickly glanced at you before looking back out the window. Luke was slightly confused on how well you knew your way around the town, he was curious on where you were taking him. But he gave up on asking after the third time you told him it was a surprise. 

Luke’s eyes widen with excitement when he sees where you're pulling into, it was an old ice cream shop that he had driven by many times, but never had the chance to try it. You smiled and turned off the car and grabbed your wallet from your purse and gave Luke a big smile “Come on, I'll even let you get 3 scoops!” 

You laugh as you watch Luke quickly leave the truck and rush around the front of the truck to open your door. You giggle and take Luke's hand that he held out for you, doing your best to do a posh British accent “Thank you kind sir” Luke smiles and closes the door for you, following you across the parking lot, his spirit was lifted already. 

“This is so good; how did you find this place?” Luke asked you before he took another lick of his chocolate ice cream, of course having a waffle cone. And despite you saying he could get 3 scoops, he only got 2. You look away from your bowl of your favorite ice cream and to your brothers whose focus was up at the stars. The two of you were sitting on the tailgate of the truck, neither of you realizing that your legs were swinging in unison. 

“Oh, I found it the last time I came to visit, and you and Jack were at practice, I've been craving it since” you answered him as you looked back on the day. Luke nods and continues to eat his ice cream. Silence came across the two of you again, Luke didn't know what to say and you could see the way his shoulders became tense that he was thinking of something. You had a pretty good idea what he was thinking about, hockey. 

“You played really good tonight luke” you broke the silence, and you watched as his shoulders sagged and a frown came across his lips as he looked down at his lap. You hated seeing how discouraged he looked, this wasn't like luke. He never let it get to him like this before, but it's different . . . it's the NHL, it's his dream. He whispered bitterly “We lost.” 

“You still played really good, i'm really proud of you luke” you vowed as you gently nudged his knee with yours, your tone proving how genuine you were. You were a good big sister you liked to think, so you would never have a favorite brother . . . but your little brother Luke will always have a special place in your heart. The little brother who would listen to you rant all about your school drama while the other two were doing God knows what, the little brother who fully trusted you to drive him to get ice cream when you first got your license while Quinn and jack swore you would kill them. Your sweet little brother Luke who was far too good for this world. 

Luke let out a heavy breath and his eyes started to water as he listened to you, he heard others say they were proud of him, but it was different, more meaningful coming from you. Unlike you he made it very clear that you're his favorite sibling, that you always have been. The big sister that he always knew would have his back no matter what, the big sister that always was on his side. He looked up from his lap and turned his head to look at you to see you were already smiling at him. “Thank you sissy.” 

“Not just for the compliment” Luke quickly spoke before you could, fully turning his body to face you, thankfully he had eaten most of his ice cream, so he didn't have to worry about it dripping. Luke never really liked talking about his emotions or just having deep conversations in general, but he didn't have to worry about any of that with his big sister who always made it clear that he could talk to you no matter what. Luke continues speaking “But for taking me here and for being here for me, for always being here for me.” 

“I'll always be here lukey” You promised as you set your ice cream bowl next to you before leaning over and pulling Luke into a much-needed hug. Luke smiles and closes his eyes, hugging you with one arm while the other holds his cone away from you, not wanting to get any ice cream on you. Luke lets himself melt into the hug; he really didn't want you to leave. You couldn't help tearing up as you think of Luke and everything he's been through and how strong he is, you really are so proud of your little . . . well not so little brother. You sniffled and whispered, “God why did you have to grow up so fast.” 

“Trying to catch up with you, you old lady” Luke jokes, wanting to lift the mood, he really hated seeing you cry, and he knew you so well that he was sure you were going to.  A loud laugh leaves his lips as you pull away from the hug and dramatically move away from him. Despite his words you smiled as you listened to luke laugh, it was the type of laugh that made you want to join in. You pulled the keys out of your pocket and slap them into luke's hand before jumping off the tailgate of the truck and snatching your ice cream “That's it your driving home.” 

Luke continued to laugh and watch as you stomp over to the passenger seat, the famous Hughes pout on your lips. Luke quickly gets off the bed of the truck and puts up the tailgate shouting a cheeky remark that only made him laugh harder at the quick glare you sent him.  

“Thank God! Brock drives you around so much I'm pretty sure you forgot how to drive” 

°. — taglist ( @cixrosie @toasttt11 )

[sweatervest-obsessed]

Birthday Present

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

WC: 484

TW: Fluff. drinking, mention of lunatic unsubstantiated in passing .

A/N: a little somethin to keep you held over while I finish up the longer pics I'm publishing this weekend.

“Checkmate in three.” 

“What?” Spencer stared at the board, and then you, and then back at the board. “There’s no—”

“Well it’s your move Spence. Let’s finish the game then.” 

About one minute later, when you had successfully checkmated him in three moves, Spencer was suddenly no longer in the happy mood he had been in when he suggested you play chess. 

“Oh Spence please, it’s just a game.” You sighed and started to pack up the game. 

“I just don’t—”

“Ah!” You cut him off. “Don’t finish that sentence if you wanna sleep in the same bed as me tonight.” 

Spencer kept his mouth shut, opting to help you pick up the rest of the pieces of the game instead. 

“No one will ever believe you.” He grumbled, getting up and placing the chest board over on the small table by the window. 

“Yeah but you will. And that’s all the power I need, baby.” You laughed a bit before taking a sip of the wine in front of you. 

“You are evil.” 

“And yet you still love me Doctor Spencer Reid.” 

Spencer sighed dramatically and sat down next to you on the couch. “I guess I do.” 

You shifted slightly so that you could rest your head on his shoulder; both of you basking in each other’s company. 

“I’m really grateful you’re home for my birthday.” You whispered, not moving your head off his shoulder. “And before you say anything, I don’t blame you for not being here last year, I mean it’s not your fault some guy was chopping people’s limbs up in Texas. I’m just…I’m glad you’re here with me.” 

Spencer didn’t know how to feel. You felt him tense up a bit, causing you to pull away and frown. “Spencer what.” 

“Nothing just.” He ran his hands through his hair. “It sucks that I’m always off on a whim, that there is basically no consistency to my work schedule so the threat of not being here for important events like your birthday or even just a long weekend just. I-I don’t know.” 

“The fact that your schedule is inconsistent makes it extremely consistent. I know who I married. Does it suck sometimes? Yes. But that’s just because I miss you. Sometimes, it’s nice considering the fact that I enjoy being independent–”

“I know who I married.” Spencer cut you off, a small smile on his face. 

“Yeah Yeah, tough guy with the big brain and a badge, okay okay.” 

Spencer chuckled and kissed your head, wrapping his arm around you and rubbing his thumb on your hip. “So--,” 

“So buttons babe.” 

“Sooo, if you let me finish, what is next on the birthday agenda.” 

You pursed your lips and smirked slightly. 

“What.” 

You stood up and walked away from him. 

“Babe, what are you doing?” 

“Why don’t you follow me and find out, Doctor.” 

Happy Birthday to you indeed.

[metalomagnetic]

Hi Metalo!

Have you ever thought about potential patronus animals for the Black family? If so, what kind of animals would fit in your opinion?

As always, your questions make me think a lot. This one is sooo difficult!

Ok, so this might be unpopular but I feel Bella would be a lioness. She is a figure of strength, is territorial, she works hard, perfect hunter that takes down prey twice her size, devoted mother (to her child or to her little sisters) teaching her youngster skills they need to survive, and protecting them so fiercely.

Narcissa is a spider queen. Spiders also have *remarkable* maternal instincts, more developed than in many other species of the earth. Spiders can be aggressive, but also quite peaceful, depending on circumstances. She weaves a beautiful home, but that can also turn into a trap. She isn't showy in her strength, prefers to lure her target into her web, where she can deliver that final, venomous bite to an unsuspecting target that dared trespass against her.

Andromeda is a fox. Cunning, agile and highly adaptable. not overly aggressive, preferring to live their life in stealth mode.

Regulus is a coyote. Almost like a dog, only much shier than a dog, and more cautious. However, when push comes to shove, coyotes are quite territorial and willing to die for what is theirs.

Sirius, obviously, is perfect as a dog. (And I also used him to give Regulus and Andromeda similar patronus forms, from a canidae family, since they are related and one would assume they share traits.)

Ok, so these are the only ones we know from canon, or at least we know something about them that allowed me to try to guess their patronus.

Now, for my head-canon about the rest of the Black family and their personalities, which I depict in 'It runs'.

Waburga is a polar bear. Polar bears are aways striving for the highest possible standards. They are fierce, and they are obsessed with their children. They protect their cubs with their lives, but they also expect their cubs to behave and fall in line. It's a tough life out there, so a polar bear mother needs to teach her youngsters to be ruthless. They love their children, but can be a bit rough in handling them. They can also be very gentle with their cubs, when there's no 'emergency' situation going on. Polar bears are strong, fearless but so lonely. Something about Walburga ending up alone, defined by solitude in her last years, reminds me of a polar bear wandering alone in a harsh, cold environment (Grimmauld, cough cough). Polar bear mamas are also one of the few animals species that become depressed, distressed and vulnerable when they lose a child. They can even stop hunting after such a loss, and waste away.

Orion in 'It runs' is an eagle. Fearless, confident, quite arrogant. Extremely territorial. An eagle will never surrender, regardless of the size or strength of its opponent. It will do anything to regain its territory and it will always defend its nest. Eagles are quite paternal, like most raptors. An eagle father will bring sticks to the nest, and will bring food to the young. When babies fall from nest, a father often dives to catch them on their wings. However, an eagle father also picks favourites, and there's a food hierarchy going on, often choosing to give more food to one baby, encouraging sibling rivalry, which is apparently important for the development of a raptor. Eagle males do form a pair bond with a single female, however, if the female isn't available in mating season, he will find another one.

Cygnus would be a tiger. Not the most paternal, but a fierce predator. They're also one of the few brave enough to get into fights with bears. Tigers and dogs are amongst the few that will look at a bear and go 'yeah, I can take that' (hence why Cygnus and Sirius are the only ones mad enough to get into fights with Walburga). Also, he's a tiger mostly because I want Bella to take after her dad, the only big cats in their immediate family.

Alphard is a lone wolf, to keep up with many of the Blacks having canine counterparts. He's majestic, he's fierce, too, he loves a pack, but at some point he got into too many fights with the leaders of his pack and took off on his own, though at night sometimes he cries to the moon, missing them.

Arcturus is a hawk. Similar to his son, but a tad less fierce. Just a tad.

Sirius the old was a sphinx. He's a special badass, and the world sees him as this almost mythological creature. He has the body of a land apex predator, like many of his descendants (lion, like Bella), but he also has the wings of an eagle (like Orion). He's enigmatic, merciless, and has a gaze that will see straight into your soul. He knows everything that goes on, everywhere. A sphinx represents royalty and sacred status, which is how he views his family (and himself).

This was so much fun. I really like how they turned out, and I love that in this family of vertebrates, Narcissa is the only invertebrate (since she's always the outliner with her blonde hair). She's no less lethal, no less impressive, but she's a tad different from the rest.

I hope you liked it! ❤️

[meowzfordayz]

they're-both-so-helpless

Rengoku Kyojuro x Reader

Word Count: ~600

CW: explicit language, mild sexual content

Author’s Note: starting 2024 off w/ Kyojuro❣️ Began writing this while at work… winter makes for slow days when selling ice cream. 😆 Pt 2 coming ~soon aka prob within the next 24 hrs since my shift’s almost over lol.

emphasis-on-helpless, helplessly-in-love

Missing your boyfriend is tough… especially when he isn’t actually your boyfriend.

“He might as well be!” Mitsuri says whenever she’s with you, “I swear you check your phone at least twice as often ever since you became friends.” The tips of your ears warm, eyes glued to the newest Snap of Kyojuro’s cheerful face. “Will you at least show me?” Mitsuri huffs, head tilting to catch a glance, “Aww, he’s so cute!” “But he’s not my boyfriend,” you mutter, quickly snapping a blurry photo of your melting ice cream. Eyes gleaming, Mitsuri hums knowingly, slinging a giddy arm around you without another word. You silently thank her gesture of respecting your privacy—something your other friend, Shinobu, rarely does—hurriedly eating a spoonful of your dessert as he snaps back: You got ice cream without me?! ☹️ I fear I am mortally wounded. 💔 You appease him with a Snap of your own frown, promising him i’ll bring u next time 🥺🍦 pointedly ignoring Mitsuri’s smooching noises when Kyojuro fires back with It’s a date! 😁😋 Sooo maybe nobody respects your privacy.

You’ve never considered yourself shy, but you have resigned yourself to being perpetually friendzoned, a bit too person-next-door in a would-never-date-their-neighbor way rather than a person-next-door who also is-totally-down-to-date-their-handsome-neighbor way. Like puffing out your chest while walking on the sidewalk to convey confidence and get people out of your path, you’ve mastered the art of giving off don’t-fuck-with-me vibes — despite desperately wanting to fuck.

And therein lies the problem-not-actually-a-problem with one Rengoku Kyojuro. Also known as, Mitsuri’s favorite barista. Also known as, immediately flirted with you when Mitsuri finally took you to his cafe for brunch, writing his number on your cup and everything. Also known as, might not have been flirting with you and in fact was just being nice because he has yet to properly-not-jokingly ask you on a real-official-non-platonic date. You’ve survived a blustery autumn of pumpkin spice lattes and too many free muffins, persevered through a surprisingly snug winter of It’s my special recipe hot chocolates and ice skating with the gang (Mitsuri, Shinobu, Kyojuro, and his insufferable friend Tengen), and felt wistfully hopeful as spring came and went, having your voice compared to blossoming flowers and your smile to tender sunshine… only to dream alone, his contagious grin and addictingly cozy hugs lingering even as you woke with the sensation of tears in your eyes.

—

“You should tell him how you feel!” Shinobu sighs, an exasperated, endeared sound as she watches you bemoan your adoration.

“Oh yeah, because he definitely feels the same after a year of literally zero signs!”

“He called your ice cream plans last week a date,” Mitsuri chimes in, rubbing your shoulders as she exchanges a they’re-both-so-helpless look with Shinobu.

“Platonically,” you shoot back, sagging into Mitsuri’s touch, “He’s so gentlemanly and sweet, I never know whether we’re flirting or he’s simply being polite! Friendly! A friend!”

“I repeat,” Shinobu deadpans, “Tell him how you feel.”

You pout, chewing on your upper lip as you mumble, “And if he doesn’t like me?”

“Nonsense!” Mitsuri declares brightly, squeezing you—Owww—a little too hard, “He doesn’t talk to anyone else like he talks to you.”

“I talk to you differently than I talk to Shinobu. Doesn’t mean anything,” you grumble.

“I’m trying to uplift you,” Mitsuri huffs, playfully pulling on your earlobe, “Trust us. Okay? He would absolutely date you if he knew you were interested in dating.”

“Since when have I said I’m not interested?!” you wail in dismay.

“You’ve never said you are interested,” Shinobu quips.

You scowl at her as she tosses a good natured pillow at you, Mitsuri clicking her tongue as you squish the pillow against your sternum, heart aching when your phone lights up Rengoku Kyojuro sent you a Snap • 🔥.

[applepixls]

hey guys. have you heard of hadestown.

(its a musical that meshes the myths of orpheus & eurydice and hades & persephone)

orpheus is a naive (sorta sheltered?) bard who acts on his whims while eurydice is a realistic and tough girl who's doing all she can to survive

hades is king of the underworld and keeps persephone there a lot of the year meaning there's a lot of winter up above

now hear me out.

3rd life.

scar as orpheus, grian as eurydice.

wedding song as scar proposing they take over the desert, the second verse being grian suggesting they take the dark oak. now, imagine all I've ever known as a dark night dancing in the desert not to mention, "its a sad tale, its a tragedy" (bonus: in a gathering storm eurydice calls for orpheus and he isn't there because he's off writing his song, narratively similar to grian calling for scar in double life when everyone was digging around for their sugar cane while scar was off accidentally lighting the place on fire and petting the jellie pandas)

extra bonus ideas:

persephone sounds like bdubs? like, listen to livin' it up on top. the gritty voice/singing and all her attitude (/pos) and some of the lyrics "who makes the summer sun shine bright?/thats right! persephone!" (he was the esmp2 sun god!) she sort of reminds me of the vibe bdubs gave off when he was ren the king's guy in s9 (my impression was he was kinda frantically running around at ren's whim, its not at all the same with hades and persephone but there's the sort of obeying a king thing)

leading me to my next thought of ren as hades. someone i was listening with said "winter has come" which made me think of "red winter is coming" dfhj

but another thought is just the last life ethubs divorce? seems very relevant with bdubs persephone parallels

also in hey little song bird hades refers to eurydice as a canary and we all know whos a canary

hermes (conductor of the train on the road to hell) and the fates play a narrator type role except hermes is more explicit while the fates are the humming in the back of your head they weave the path of how everything goes and you cant defy them

martyn throughout all the series is a sort of nomadic no solid home kinda guy and always self aware (he makes the lore-) which connects him to hermes for me but at the same time the fates are very much watcher/listener things so like bigb and martyn? (i don't know the lore sorry lol) i'd also say that somehow impulse's littlefinger flip floppy triple double agent character in third life gives a vibe like he knows whats going on in all the groups also connecting him to them for me

(i will say scar could fit hermes as well in being a sort of travelling sales person in last life and a bit in double life? also I've read dirges in the dark which means i see him and the devil and making deals with complicated clauses as very interconnected)

my final note (and being a devils advocate)

scar could also parallel hades.

if you watch his perspective he's very happygolucky and doesn't seem to get the real weight of the situation and such but from other perspectives his and grians deal seems kinda like he's had grian sign away his soul or he's kidnapped grian and there's some stockholm syndrome happening (its actually grians guilt but i digress)

hades convinces eurydice (scar is a silver tongued man) to sign away her soul to him and also the story of hades and persephone is that he kidnaps her and she eats some pomegranite and has to stay in the underworld for part of the year

sooo yeah. paralells between hadestown and 3rd life/life series. enjoy.

[cibeeorsomeshit]

Stolitz Week 2024

Day Four: Human Disguise/Blending Family (ao3)

Running into your sort-of date’s daughter in the human world while wearing a dress and wig probably didn’t help her opinion of you.

“What are you doing here?”

Blitzø was just about to snap at this girl to fuck off, but the slightly hooked nose, the softer but still inhuman glow to her eyes cut his aggression off, so instead he stammered: “Octavia?”

Octavia looked so unimpressed with him that Blitzø felt like he was getting bullied by the tilt of her mouth alone, even though he was more than ten years her senior. Maybe it was the Goetia pride that oozed off her naturally, or — more likely — it was because she was Stolas’ daughter and he was always a little afraid of that.

“Unnnnnf.” Blitzø was suddenly very conscious of the fact that he was by all means, dressed as a slutty college sorority girl (with clothes he stole from Moxxie’s wardrobe). Not that he was self-conscious about being in makeup and a dress. Hell-knows he did that enough when clubbing, but it was not really something he wanted Octavia to see when her opinion of him was already lower than the last ring of hell. 

She was still waiting. Blitzø belatedly remembered he was asked a question. 

“I’m looking for a gift. For Loona. For her two-year sobriety anniversary. She probably doesn’t even remember it but I do and I heard about this species of spider that sounded interesting from…” — your dad— “...sooo, that’s what I’m doing. Here. In a dress.”

Octavia looked down at his clothes like she was only just noticing it, and her frown somehow managed to deepen. Blitzø felt his nervous smile wobble. Sweat collected in his ass crack. Why didn’t he just wear a thong like a true sorority slut?

“No luck so far.” Blitzø tried to fill the uncomfortable lack of response with some uncomfortable response. 

“I can see that,” Octavia said. “Did the spiders do that to you?”

By “that,” Blitzø assumed she meant the torn and smudged clothes and the scratches all over him. “Oh, pfft, no. I accidentally stepped on a snake and it bit me. The venom got me so high I fell into a bush.”

Silence.

“Okay, there were several bushes. On the way down a cliff.”

“Uh-huh.” 

They stood, staring just past each other’s shoulder for a few moments, before Blitzø rubbed his arm and said, unnaturally civil and lacking in lewd vocabulary, “Well. I’ll leave you to your…thing. And I’m just gonna…yeah.”

Blitzø scampered off. When he thought he had a good distance between them he stopped and put his face in his hands. Fuuuuuuck….

Wallowing in mortification was familiar to him but this was a whole new kind of pit, since he had been trying so hard to get Octavia to hate him less so Stolas wouldn’t be put in a tough position. The last few attempts (when they ran into each other in the palace) had been icy ( Octavia) and awkward (Blitzø) and Stolas looked as though he would burst into tears on the spot when Octavia would just walk away without saying anything to either of them. Blitzø always left very soon after each encounter, and his self-hatred was only soothed a little when Stolas would ask him to stay, to just let him talk to Via first. He never stayed. 

Yeah, so, fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

“You said it was for Loona?” A voice suddenly popped up behind him.

“HOLY FUCK!”

“Wow. I thought you were supposed to be an assassin.” Octavia looked up at the low branch where Blitzø had decided to take refuge. 

“And I thought you were,” Blitzø dropped down before her, patting himself to conceal his blundering response to a teenage girl sneaking up to him. “Somewhere else.” 

“I want to help you find the spider.” Octavia said. 

“...Really?”

“My dad sent me to practice collecting plant samples, so I’ll probably come across them at some point anyway.”

“Oh, uh. That’s good. Thanks.” Then because Blitzø was so astonished and confused, he added another “Thank you?” with the question mark loud and clear.

She didn’t look at Blitzø, started in a direction seemingly at random. “It’s whatever.”

They walked in tense silence for a few minutes before it became too much for Blitzø.

“Your dad kept nagging me about coming up there without at least attempting to pass as a human.”

“And why did you pick,” Octavia made a vague gesture with her hand. “That?”

“It’s easier to get away with things as a girl.” Blitzø paused and took a chance, blinking up at Octavia dramatically and hoping her sense of humor was somewhat similar to her father. “And looking cute is just a bonus.”

Nothing. Blitzø considered pitching himself off the nearest cliff. 

“Pfft,” came the tiniest, most understated snort. Blitzø’s dramatic puppy eyes suddenly became very genuine and very watery. Octavia turned the snort into a cough.

“I only laughed because that was ridiculous.”

“Hey,” Blitzø replied easily. “That’s what clowns are for.”

After that the quiet air between them was less one that made Blitzø regret not becoming a relatively respectable citizen of hell and more one that had him checking Octavia’s expression every so often to make sure he wasn’t irritating her with his proximity alone. So far so good. Maybe.

Octavia was quick at locating the spiders’ whereabouts, though left the catching to Blitzø, watching silently as Blitzø darted around trees, plucking them up from their webs. 

“Never thought of you as particularly athletic,” she said when he landed neatly next to her, jar full of crawling spiders. “I always assumed you just used guns for your work.”

“I do love a good bullet through the head,” Blitzø grinned. “But I was raised in a circus and it’s all muscle memory,  like learning how to ride a —” Blitzø cut himself off before accidentally making things very, very weird.

“A bike?” 

“Eh, close enough.”

Thankfully, Octavia’s attention was elsewhere. “Dad loves the circus.”

“Yeah. That’s where we met.”

The shock must have been truly intense because for a second her human face morphed back into a demon before pulling itself together again. “What? I thought you guys met when—”

The unspoken “When you fucked my dad and ended my parents’ marriage” hung very loud and charged at the end. Blitzø’s tail swished back and forth anxiously.

“We actually met when we were both kids. His dad brought him to my family’s circus for his birthday or some shit. Then my old man decided to sell me to spend a day with Stolas.”

“That’s…extremely troubling.”

“If it makes it any better, I don’t think your dad ever found out about that.”

Even more shock. “He doesn’t know?”

“I sure as hell aren’t going to tell him.” Blitzø pursed his lips, feeling somehow protective of Stolas in front of the man’s own daughter. “It doesn't matter anyway. I ended up having a great time. Stolas was really sweet.” It took him a second, then Blitzø started sputtering. “I mean he was fun! Not the, not the other thing. We had fun.”

In an uncharacteristically droll tone, Octavia teased, “Aw, did you have a crush on him?”

“What? No!” 

“You so did!” 

“I really, really didn’t.” That was true, but Blitzø suspected the way he was struggling to keep his blush down made it hard to believe. It didn’t help that now he had a big, fat, scary crush that was embarrassing for someone over the age of thirty to have. 

Octavia giggled. So really, Blitzø had no choice but to let her have this win. 

“Let’s go then.” She seemed to have a complete turn in her mood. 

“Go where?”

Octavia didn’t answer. Instead she flicked her fingers at him, and his torn and tattered clothes repaired themselves to better condition than they were in before. Blitzø couldn’t see, but he suspected his makeup was all pristine and way classier now as well. He guessed he shouldn’t be surprised that Stolas’ offspring learn spells of improving appearance before spells that mutilate your enemies. 

A portal opened up. “Where are we going?” Blitzø asked again. And again, Octavia didn’t answer. They stepped through, onto a very expensive and posh looking street in front of an equally posh hotel. Blitzø was about to be extremely childish and obnoxious to get an answer out of Octavia when a familiar voice interrupted him: “Via, darling! You finished your work so quickly! How wonderful — oh, who’s that with—”

Stolas’ rambling cut off when their eyes met. Blitzø didn’t think much of humans, so he thought it was unfair for Stolas to look so pretty as one, but Stolas burst into a full-blown blush at the sight of him first. 

“Blitzy!” Stolas’ red eyes were almost blending into his red face. “What are you doing here?”

“We ran into each other,” Octavia said. “Where’s Loona?”

“She’s at our usual table, dear.”

“Loona’s here?” Blitzø asked. 

“Why don’t you go and find her. I’ll go order you something. You must be starving.”

Octavia just hummed and shot Blitzø one last look. “The brunch here is great. You should try it.” And walk through the hotel entrance.

“Did she just invite me to stay and have brunch with you guys?” Blitzø asked dumbly.

“Blitzy.” Stolas didn’t answer his question as well — what the hell was wrong with this family? — but instead tugged him behind some ridiculous hedges that were shaped like people. “You cannot just show up with no warning—”

Blitzø shrank into himself. 

“ —looking so cute. It’s too much for me. I need at least a two-hour notice to prepare myself—”

Blitzø looked up at Stolas like he was crazy. “What the fuck are you yapping on about?”

Stolas bent down to look Blitzø in the eyes. “I am going to kiss you now.”

Blitzø was very confused, very hot, and very weak in the knees. “Okay.” 

It took them a solid twenty minutes before they made their way into the hotel restaurant, and also completely forgot to order anything. Luckily their daughters were smart and knew their dads too well. Stolas and Blitzø were greeted with a table full of food and pastries and strong smelling coffee, with seats readied for them by the side of their family.

(Day Three) ← →(Day Five&Six)

[therussiancourier]

2024.

lots of rambling. art summary in the end

Hey, it’s FINALLY the end of 2024. This year was… truly something. So many things have happened and so much has changed, including my art. It’s so confusing and I don’t know where to start.

One of the biggest things that has happened to me is that I’ve lost someone close to me, a family member. It wasn’t an unexpected loss, but it sure as hell did hurt. Still hurts and may hurt for a long time, but that’s life. And life is tough as fuck at times. I miss that person and sometimes it still doesn’t seem real that he’s gone. Still, one thing I know for sure - he would be proud of who I am becoming. And that’s something to fight for.

One of the other things is that I dropped out of school and got into a rather good college. It feels so much more freeing being here and I love it. I finally feel at peace with my future and it seems like I have a goal to work forward to. I see my own existence not just as a bypasser of my own life anymore. I’m not as afraid to interact with people, I have nice small talks and… I’m growing. That’s something I didn’t expect. 

My best friend of a few years and I are driving apart. We had it coming and I know that people come and go but still it's weird. I hope for all the best for my buddy. He’s a smart fella and has a lot of potential. I haven’t been the best friend I could be and I hope he can find somebody worthy. 

Enough about bad things. Let's talk about good ones. The best ones even. I’ve met my partner this year and they are the most wonderful person. I am just so thankful to have him by my side. I hope to continue growing with them. Future seems bright so far!

This post is much more serious than the last one hahhahah.hahhahah. I’ve only now come to realize that. Oops! Welp, I just wanted to share some things that matter to me and changed me throughout the year. I feel calm and certain that I can handle whatever’s to come in my life. But enough of that. Let’s discuss the other side of my life. My art! My creations! MY SOUL!

I grew as an artist a hella lot. And my biggest passion so far isn’t even Fallout which is… weird. I’ve grown sooo, soooooo attached to Lethal Company, I’ve created so many OC’s (my separate and the ones with my dearest partner), I’ve written so many short texts that I never posted anywhere. My artstyle evolved. And now I mainly draw in Clipstudio. Just stop me from changing programs every damn year already. Anyways, I've been very passionate about this game and it's been the fire in my heart. In artistic way. fuck me i don't know what am i sayying

I haven’t been in the DSAF fandom for long this time but I did so much while in there. I still look back with such love in my heart. I promise you, I will come back someday. And I will continue this forsaken comic that I adore very much. It is my proudest creation after all. 

Fallout is still in my heart at all times. I drew it only a little. but still. Nick Harston you're still my favourite OC. i ,ove his dumbass

In 2025 I want to continue drawing, writing, and doing what I love. I’m thinking of starting a new project with my Lethal Company OCs. I wanna do something for myself! Have fun! You know!!!!! Anyways, I will include a small collage of my drawings from this year and probably write something about them. I’ve been drawing so much. 

And I can say that… I’m proud of myself. I’m so proud of myself for everything I do. I love myself. And I wish the best for everyone who’s reading this post. All the love to you and I hope the next year will be kind to you. 

Big thanks to all the people who still follow my blog. 435 insane folks locked up in here. I hope you can handle more of my ramblings and silly OC posts for another year! Heart emoji <3

i didn't put much in here because this canvas could become. too big. i have a lot of lethal company stuff this year tehhehe. i love it

a bit of fallout. not much though.

[itjazzbicch]

Have You

Pairing: Lee Chaolan x Fem Reader 

Summary: Being a high-ranked employee at Violet Systems, Lee has always taken an interest in the reader, but due to her past, she tries to block him out but opens up on Christmas Eve when she realizes Lee's pure feelings within his gift for her...

Requested by: @sacredwarrior88 (I hope you enjoy it! Merry Christmas!)

Warnings:  SMUT! (18+ ONLY! MINORS & AGELESS BLOGS DNI! YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!) 

Word Count: 1.6k 

"You're still here, Y/N? It's Christmas Eve!"

"Yeah, so?" As a high-ranked official in Violet Systems, work was always my number one priority, even on holidays, which my boss, Lee Chaolan, was sometimes astonished by.

"It won't hurt to get out of this place, you know?" Trying to persuade me, I wasn't even looking at him, only at my monitor as he popped up behind me and proposed, "How about we go look at some Christmas lights? Come on, my dear."

Rolling my eyes, I should've known he'd try to work his charm on me, considering all the times he's tried to romance me, ignoring him, but he was persistent:

"How about a Christmas gift? I've got you something that you've been wanting! I'll be nice and let you have it now, hm?"

Now I was curious, side-eyeing him because I didn't tell anyone what I wanted for Christmas. He finally earned my attention, turning my chair around and smiling as he went to another room:

"Just sit tight!"

Letting out a deep sigh, I could only imagine that this 'gift' would be entirely out of my element or he'd make this about himself. Despite my doubts, I stayed silent and let him bring a box to me:

"Merry Christmas!"

"Thanks," I mumbled, placing the box on my lap. It was light, and I was a bit more curious, opening the red and gold box to be stunned.

"Sooo," He couldn't stop smiling at my reaction, looking into the box to see the final piece I needed for a robotics project I had been working on for a long time. It was tough to find and very expensive. I thought it would be impossible to find, "Do you like it?"

"A-Are you serious? Is this real?" I almost couldn't believe it, being delicate while examining it. "Oh, it's real," He winked, pointing something else out too, "There's more in there too."

Looking into the box again, there was a slim, folded piece of paper. A brochure? Not a brochure, but tickets and all the information I needed for a week's vacation at a fabulous resort in the Philippines.

"That lasts until a year if you don't want to go immediately," Lee explained, smiling more as he knew me well, "Maybe after you finish that big project."

"Wow, I-" No one had ever given me such a gift, my smile genuine as I looked up at him, "Thank you, Lee. I appreciate this so much."

"You deserve it," He smiled back, offering again, "So, let's enjoy the holiday, hm?"

His gift showed how he knew me and cared, so I let the wall I always had up down a little, turning back to my desk, "Just let me secure this piece, and we can look at lights."

Doing so, I had to hide my laugh as I heard him cheering to himself, but after securing the robotic piece, we got our coats and headed out to find a snowy night sky.

"It really feels like Christmas, don't you say?"

"Yeah," Looking up at the snow falling, glistening past all the holiday lights that colored the night, the Christmas spirit was contagious, "It's beautiful."

Our walk was lovely and peaceful, pointing out some rather flashy decorations, giggling and smiling at some jokes Lee was making, but a strong, freezing wind made me seize up, hugging my body.

"Geez, guess it's going to be cold tonight, huh?"

"Here," Taking off his jacket and wrapping me in it, I was protected from the cold, but saying to Lee as he was left in just his dress shirt:

"It's okay, really. You should be wearing a jacket."

"I'll be just fine," He assured, his kindness making me smile again, "You don't have a far walk home, right? Let's get out of the cold."

Nodding and walking to my apartment, the freezing wind was growing stronger, and as we made it to my doorstep, the tip of Lee's nose was red, but he was still focused on me:

"Did you have fun?"

"I did," I meant, loosening up a little and offering, since he'd done so much for me tonight, "Come inside and warm up, Lee. I have a fireplace."

Being so open took him aback slightly, but still cheerful and honest as he shivered inside, "Thanks. That wind was strong."

I had to giggle because I knew he was struggling without his jacket, but I made up for that by lighting the fireplace in the living room, having him sit and warm up, and getting us two cups of hot chocolate.

"This will help too," Bringing the drinks over and sitting with him, his nose no longer read and a smile on his face as he took his cup:

"Thank you."

"Of course," I sipped mine, staring at the fireplace, spacing out a little as I thought deeply.

"You okay?" He whispered, only checking on me, and I didn't expect my emotions to hit me like they did when I admitted:

"I'm fine. It's just been years since anyone's spent Christmas with me. It feels-; It's so nice. Thank you again for everything."

As our eyes locked, we couldn't stop smiling at one another to the point where we started laughing. I had to put my cup down, looking as Lee opened his arms up to me, pointing out that it was now midnight:

"Merry Christmas!"

For the first time, I hugged him, and it felt so right. I thought about all the times I had been such a grinch towards him; my past had made me close up so much, but deep down inside, I knew I could open up with him, repaying him for all my attitude that he's had to deal with by kissing his cheek softly:

"Merry Christmas."

Caressing my cheek, I was floating on a cloud headed for heaven as his lips found mine, so soft and tender against mine. My heart was overwhelmed, pressing my lips harder as my eyes shut tighter, not noticing the tear rolling down my cheek.

When that tear met his hand, he pulled back to check on me, thinking he messed up at first:

"I'm sorry-"

"It's okay. I promise," I breathed in deep, more tears swelling as I met his gaze to explain, "I just have a bad past with men, but you-; You-; You are-"

I couldn't find the words to explain it, and Lee showed that we didn't need words with a simple instruction:

"Come here, dear."

Resting back in his arms, I held his face as I kissed him, a craving taking over me and guiding him back onto the couch. Each kiss told how I only wanted someone who wanted me for me, and I was sure I found that in Lee.

Straddling over him and sitting up for a deep breath, we were stuck smiling at each other again, Lee noticing:

"I think tonight's the first time I've seen you smile."

"All thanks to you," I cooed, feeling the mood in the air, whispering an important question, "Do you truly want me, Lee?"

"You and only you," He cooed back, in a trance, as I took off my shirt, skin highlighted from the fire, coming back to kiss him and unbutton his shirt, tongues clashing passionately.

Sitting us up, we both stripped out of our clothes, Lee guiding me back to his lap, rubbing over every inch of skin he could reach, kissing:

"I've always known how special you are."

With his hands on my hips, I pressed my forehead against his, feeling a slight ache as his tip began to stretch me, letting me work at my own pace as I adjusted to his girth, slowly rolling my hips and working to take more inches.

"Oh my god," I was worked up from all the slickness I felt between my thighs, hips rolling smoother and a bit quicker, then sitting on all his cock, gasping at how deep he was in me, "Lee!"

"Stay just like that," He cooed, peppering my neck with kisses, rocking my hips back and forth at a steady, even pace, his mouth falling to my breast, closing around my nipple and sucking.

It had been so long for me, my tingling nerves jolting through my head to my toes. All these feelings weren't just from the sex but from the fact that I finally had someone who could make me happy.

By the time he picked his head up, my entire chest had been glistening from kisses, and the way he looked into my eyes drove me wild, his hands digging into my hips when I suddenly started to bounce on his cock, getting a moan to spill out of him.

He kept his eyes on me, loving the view, but his head fell back as he grinned:

"Damn, Y/N."

That made me feel confident, just smirking and returning some kisses on his neck, leaving some marks, his hands sliding down to my ass, squeezing and kneading, then throwing up his hips, making me hug his head.

"Oooo! Lee!"

Hugging my waist and thrusting up again, brushing past my sweet spot, made my walls clench up harder and harder each time, my moans growing louder and mixing with soft whines.

"I have you, baby," He cooed, kissing my cheek, a hand running up my back and holding my head against his, whispering in my ear, "Let it all go. Cum for me."

"Just don't stop," I whined, squeezing his head as my back snapped into an arch, his thrusts growing faster as I gushed around his cock, the friction following with an aftershock, making me squirm and tremble slightly, jaw-dropping at the so many feelings that swirled in my head, only able to process the same words, "Oh my god, Lee. Oh my god."

"As I said," Easing down to a still, he knew I needed a moment to regain myself, brushing the little hairs away from my face, kissing my nose, "I have you."  

2023 © itjazzbicch — do not repost or translate my work. Likes, reblogs, and comments are always welcome 

[kookykrooked]

They're jealous

Characters: Xavier Thorpe, Ajax, Male! Wednesday Addams, Male! Enid Sinclair, Tyler Galpin

Warnings: swearing, slight harassment

Wednesday M.List

Main M.List

Xavier Thorpe

you had recently gotten a job at the café in town that Tyler happened to work at and honestly you didn't know him all that well but you did know that Xavier had some kind if grudge against him which you never questioned because it seemed personal and plus it wasn't like you were friends with the boy so it never bothered you to much

today however Xavier happened to pay you a visit which you usually wouldn't mind but because Tyler didn't go to Nevermore he had no clue you and Xavier were dating which was shocking seeing as gossip spreads fast in the small town and you both have been dating for a year and a bit now, so Xavier just so happened to walk in when Tyler was attempting to ask you out and flirt with you

"c'mon just one date I promise I'll make it nice you won't regret it" he practically begged you because he can't take no for an answer

"I'm already dating someone and I would pick him over anyone any day" he then scoffed looking down mumbling something under his breath which you didn't appreciate

"what was that Tyler" you said turning around to look at him crossing your arms over your chest

"I thought you liked me, I bet I can change your mind please one chance y/n" he said slowly walking towards you and you were about to snap at him before someone else did for you

"tough luck Galpin she's with me and she'd never be with a normie like you" you looked behind Tyler to so Xavier behind him glaring daggers at him, you smiled widely before throwing yourself at him in a tight hug and you looked back at Tyler only to see him with a sour face before he walked away

you looked back at Xavier and kissed his cheek before hugging him again

Ajax (I can't spell his last name :,) )

you could feel his stare behind you but you couldn't help but be friendly to people even if said person doesn't know how to take a hint

"sooo has anyone asked you to the Rave'n yet" he said leaning his head closer to yours which only made you lean your head away from his awkwardly

"yes actually! I have been asked already" you said glad he asked thinking he'd finally leave you alone and boy were you wrong

"hm...really? I'm not surprised seeing how beautiful you are but i bet i can treat you to real good night baby" he said stalking towards you which just made you feel even more uncomfortable and you knew what he ment behind his words and you could only feel Ajax's stare harden and once his hands had reached your hips you saw his eyes look behind just before he turned to stone which shocked you at first before you grinned wide skipping over to Ajax and hugging him smiling even more when you felt his hands tighten around your waist

Male! Wednesday Addams

you had been dragged to the woods and to a scary small building by Wednesday in the dark and there was no chance you were going inside so you offered to guard outside which you now regretted seeing as its been 10 minutes and your called and the woods were only getting scarier by the second so when you felt hands wrap around your waist you let out the most loudest scream known to man your heart racing so fast

"woah woah there sweatheart, you don't have to be scared of me promise"

and you weren't any less panicked "I have a boyfriend please leave me alone " you say in a panicked tone trying to remove his arms from around your waist

"well I don't see him"

"Just because you don't see him doesn't mean he doesn't exist so please let go of my partner before I bend your legs so far back you loose all feeing in them" Wednesday said in his usual monotone voice appearing next to you with a harsh glare on his face and after that threat the man almost instantly let go and ran away

"are you alright my love?" he says turning towards you his voice not any less monotone but you could care less as you nodded your head throwing your arms around him

Male! Enid Sinclair

while you walking towards the cafeteria with Enid your very bubbly and loving boyfriend a random boy walked up to you and started spitting our terrible pick up lines honestly it was quite amusing seeing the boy say horrible pick up lines while your boyfriend who was still smiling but very clearly wasn't happy was right next to you

"are you wi-fi? cause I totally feel a connection" the boy said with a freakishly large smirk on his face while you physically cringed at that one

"um excuse me! they have a boyfriend" you hear Enid say next to you clearly jealous and all the boy did was snort

"really? this guy? you can do way better then this guy" and you were about to say something before you heard a deep growl besides ypu

"back off!" Enid says an lot more aggressive then the last time clearing loosing his patience with the guy and the guy clearly got seeing seeing Enid get his claws out

"alright alright jeez....I'm leaving" he says rolling his eyes and walking past the both of you

Enid looks over at you only to see you already grinning up at him

"what?" he says cluelessly

"nothing your just so cute when your jealous" and that made Enid turn bright red

"I wasn't jealous!"

Tyler Galpin

you were currently sat at a booth in the café Tyler worked out waiting for him to get off for a date you both had tonight and that's when a blond around 6'0 tanned muscular male sat across from you you stared at him with a blank face

"umm...hi?" you say confused having never met this man in your life

"Hey, your pretty what's your name?" you looked around to make sure he was talking to you and he most definitely was seeing as the café was practically empty

"thank...you? my name is y/n" you say still slightly confused

"such a pretty name for such a pretty face...do you have a boyfriend"

"yep I do, he's right there actually" you say pointing at Tyler who was drying a cup while staring at the both at you and the guy clearly was impressed

"really? him? you can do so much better then him, you deserve someone like me" he says leaning closer to you over the table

"no thanks, I don't think I could ever do better than him and he's 100% better then you" you say with a smirk plastered on your face and all he could was leave in a huff as you watched him leave jumping slightly when you heard Tyler's voice besides you

"who was that?" he says still drying the cup he was drying 5 minutes ago

"jeez warning next time but nobody special just some guy thinking he can get with me, why? you jealous?" you say looking up at him grinning and all he could do was look away with a red face

"No..." he replies and you let out a snort 'he so was'

That took forever

[tloujm]

Part XXXVII: Your New Groove

Author' Note: Sooo....I saw the votes and firstly thank you to everyone who did! More people participated than I thought would and it made my heart full! I can only hope this new installment in the fic was worth the wait of almost two years later. If you haven't peeped the final results, posting the chapters one by one now beat out posting all at once later, so I WILL get them all edited and set up to post on a more frequent basis. Thank you for your ongoing patience, for sticking with me and I thank you in advance because where this story is about to head, now that I am locked into the final act of Joel and the reader's storyline, I'm interested to see what y'all think.

PS: I never wrote smut like this before and I haven't written smut in a WHILE in general. I was so nervous to post this.

PPS: Sorry for the delay. Just when I was ready to upload this yesterday, Tumblr wanted to give me technical difficulties. I don't know if that was the universe telling me not to post yet but I just waited until the website wasn't being temperamental with me again.

Genre: A little fluff to start, a buildup with angst and a roaring slide into smut town

Summary: There's a glimpse into your budding friendship with Theresa. You, Joel and Ellie prepare for new changes in your joint lives. You and Joel...ahem... bond as he attempts to give you relief during the last stages of pregnancy.

Ship: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Small mentions of "daddy", ABF/lactating kink, pregnancy sex

Word Count: 4.9k

“I’m sorry again about dinner the other night.” You started. “(Y/N), I mean it, It’s fine.” Theresa chuckled as you two took a walk around the block. She recommended these walks to induce labor sooner after you complained about being tired of the persistent pelvic pain. You would push through it to walk with Theresa and Saoirse to the pantry or daycare to pick up supplies on her way home. Theresa made sure that she bundled her up well as it had been particularly windy this winter. “I can’t believe I overcooked the venison. It's harder for them to hunt in the winter, so I really hate wasting food this time of year.” “It wasn’t a waste, we still ate it.” “It was tough and dry. It was more like jerky instead of a roast.” You pouted. “Can’t believe I forgot it in the oven. Joel was right to call me stubborn for not using the timer.” “They call that pregnancy brain. You can't help it.” She laughed comfortingly. “I had it too.” “I suppose that makes me feel a bit better.”

Earlier that week, Theresa was finally able to take Joel up on his offer to come over for dinner and finally be introduced to you in person. Before that, it had just been two weeks of talking on the ham radio. Your chats would only be a half hour tops since the stables, where the radio she used was located, was not as warm as her house. She told you once that she read before the fungal plague, it was common to have your baby take a nap outside in Sweden. Something about the brisk fresh air aided in good sleep. She took those trips as an opportunity to try it out, telling you about how bundling the little one up and parking her hand-me-downed stroller at the door of the stable worked like a charm. If the idea was odd to you as someone from the north-east, it surely would not sit right with Mr. Texas. 

You were surprised that she hadn’t brought her baby over for dinner. She didn’t say that she wouldn’t through the radio but once she showed up, she explained that she hardly ever had time away to just be an adult and not just a mom, so she found a babysitter. You and Joel understood that. He learned to believe that it truly took a village to raise a child and was lucky to have had as much help as he did as a teen dad.

Theresa blended into your life surprisingly well from the start, almost as if a kindred spirit. She made you feel so comfortable with the idea of motherhood and was very kind to Ellie. Joel always kept reservations about people in general, but you noticed nothing of real concern from him, especially after he noticed how much you’d begun opening up physically. He made a mental note to thank Wendy one of these days.

You even felt comfortable enough to talk to her about intimate things; things about your ever changing body and marital issues. You knew that Joel wouldn’t want you to share the latter, but you felt that those issues stemmed from a sense of low self esteem. Theresa had a way with words and it really seemed to get through to you better than anyone else. That was Joel’s goal, so he ultimately couldn’t be mad at that, you thought.

She became something like the sister-you-never-had and you couldn’t wait to formally meet her baby. You had yet to hold or so much as see her from being completely bundled up. You thought about yours and hers growing up together; imagining a more comfortable Ellie babysitting the two. The daydreams were a heartwarming glimpse into a life that you never imagined you’d have even before the fungal outbreak.

*********

With only a handful of weeks left in your pregnancy, Tommy started to reduce Joel’s shifts. Used to keeping active, he immediately felt weird about it, but overall knew that he wanted to be there for you. 

Recently, you entered your final phase of the pregnancy: nesting. Honestly, it did annoy Joel when he couldn’t find things. You’d constantly move them around claiming that it was not the perfect location or baby proofed. Joel couldn’t afford to properly baby proof his home when Sarah was born, but she never got seriously hurt, so he didn’t think too much about changing their home. He only imagined it a bit more messy with toys and such. Despite all of that, he admired your ingenuity as he watched you DIY padding for table corners. 

Joel found that this phase would annoy you too, but only when he was involved. He always seemed to be in your way and asked too often if you needed help. Ultimately, his solution was to do something outside of the house to give you some space. This is what started one of his biggest home projects to date.

Chicken pox broke out at the daycare which delayed Ellie moving in. Her initial response to the dinner where you asked if she wanted to live with you two was positive yet reserved, but by the end of the meal, Ellie showed how ecstatic she was to join the family. While she was still on the mends of sickness, Joel decided to finish his surprise for her so it could be ready once she was fully healed. 

A sigh of satisfaction left Joel’s mouth when he opened the door to the garage; the renovation was almost complete. You suggested to him that she might like to have the garage because she was a preteen currently sharing a room with 5 other girls and may want space. He argued that you were overcompensating and offering too much space as the garage was twice the size of the master. You rebutted, expressing fear that she may feel smothered if you two forced her to stay in the craft room which was right next door to them and the nursery. It was also slightly smaller than the nursery. Joel, on the other hand, was more than fine with packing up his woodworking things and moving it into the basement or garage to keep her close by. Besides, he knew that soon enough she would be a full fledged teen and was afraid of experiencing the rebellious teenage years that he only got a taste of with Sarah. He wasn't ready to catch any unexpected visitations of the male variety alone with her in the garage. 

Despite you two being the closest people to Ellie at the settlement, you knew that her moving in was a big, new transition in her life on top of the trauma that she was nowhere near finished processing. Their views on assuming what was best for her were too opposing to save her bedroom location as a surprise. They eventually decided to let Ellie choose where she wanted to stay on the property. 

Joel was proud of his handy work and hoped that she would like her new room. Seeing it set up as a living space again reminded him of when you lived there after you two moved to Jackson. He couldn’t help but decorate it based off of Sarah’s room as that was the only preteen girl he knew, but also made sure he scattered some stuff of Ellie’s around to make it feel familiar. While quarantined at the daycare, she worked to pack the rest of what she owned, which was not much. The memories of his daughter and your distance from him at the beginning mixed in with the room’s future use brought up bittersweet emotions.

He took a break from the garage to have lunch. The faint sound of your cries traveled down into the kitchen. It took only a few moments for it to hit Joel’s ears again as he stopped what he was doing to confirm it wasn't in his head. Immediately, his protective mode activated and he sprinted up the stairs to see what was wrong. 

You were standing in the ensuite bathroom with the door open. He found you topless, weeping in front of the mirror. His eyes immediately went to your chest as if it was his first time ever seeing a pair of breasts. He only ever gets to see yours lately in glimpses. They were larger with fresh stripes patterned across them. Your areolas were larger, darker and noticeably puffy. He cautiously approached you, surprised that you did not cover up or back away. You were genuinely at a loss and needed help. 

“Nothing’s working.” You sniffled. “What’s not working, darlin’?” He gently attempted to pull you into a hug. You hissed when your nipple barely scratched the fabric of his worn out sweatshirt. “’m sorry.” He whispered. “Baby, what’s wrong?” “They hurt so bad! I didn’t think this would happen already. Dr. Carson didn’t say that I would need to pump so early!” Your voice was laced with frustration. “The pressure was never this bad—” “Why didn’t you say anythin’?” “It was never this bad before; barely felt it. It would leak, so I put towels in my bra. The pressure would relieve itself and then build back up and leak again." Tears continued to stream down your face. "This morning though...they feel like they're going to explode right off my chest. They won't even leak. The pamphlet said that massaging them would ease the pain, so that’s what I did and it helped at first, but it came back. It said that the milk gets stuck if it just sits there. I'm trying to pump it out but the damn thing...” You sobbed. “What’d you mean stuck?” “Something in the milk causes it to harden.” You pouted. “The baby isn’t even here yet so I can’t breastfeed and I can’t figure out the fucking hand pump. It’s not fucking staying on and I…” You pointed to it laying on the tiled floor. “I kinda broke it and…and the pamphlet said that it would only get worse if I don’t get the milk out!” You cried out all at once. “It said my ducts could get completely clogged and that it could lead to fever and infection!” You leaned your head on his shoulder as you rambled and he rubbed his hands up and down your back. “It feels like fucking rocks are trying to come out; they're so fucking heavy!” Your tone became one of defeat. “I don’t know what else to do, Joel. I feel so bad; That was the doctor’s only pump.” You tuck your head into his chest and Mumble, “Just fucking cut them off of me. I don’t care anymore.” “Here, sit down for me, ok baby?” Joel guided you to the toilet. “Where’s the pamphlet?” Joel couldn’t help but find you adorable. Even though he knew you were in real pain, it reminded him of when you’d sometimes act out melodramatically to get his attention and it did always get his attention. “I’ve read through it all, front to back. I tried everything it told me to do. Hot towel compress, massage them…and I did it exactly as they said.” You responded as you pointed out the bathroom door into the bedroom. In large font, the front of the tri-fold read 'Breastfeeding 101'. Joel picked it up and returned to you. “Some came out earlier, but nothing now. I haven’t hated my boobs since high school when I first got stretch marks.” Joel chuckled lightly, thinking that you were making light of it yourself until he heard your sobs again. He came back into the bathroom with the pamphlet, reviewing it himself just in case you missed something.

“Umm…ok” Joel too was at a loss. He never encountered this issue with Sarah’s mom. He knew that she ultimately decided not to breastfeed, but if she had any issues with it, she didn’t share it with him. Despite their intimacy, she understandably shared most of her maternal struggles with her own mom. “Let’s try something new, alright? First, let’s get you comfortable.” “How am I supposed to get comfortable?” “You’re gonna lay down for starters, now c’mon.” Joel helped you up and walked you to the bed. “Feel better?” “A little.” You whimpered. “I promise I will make you feel better.” He said in his soft twang. He kissed your forehead before sprinting back to the bathroom to soak another towel in freezing cold water. “Warning, its gonna be real cold.” You watched as he gingerly shifted each breast to fully cover every inch of your chest. “Let that sit there and I’ll be right back.” He began to sprint towards the door when you stopped him. “Where are you going?” “I’m gonna go call Dr. Carson from the craft room. I’ll just be down the hall.” “Please don’t leave.” Your voice was not only laced with defeat, but with desperation. It pulled at Joel’s heartstrings badly. “Darlin’, I know you’re in pain now, but maybe the doc has some pain meds or they found another pump.” He expressed. His doe eyes gave you one last look. Your silence was his response to go. 

As he walked down the hall to their ham radio, Joel thought about what would happen if there actually was no other pump. The medicine was only temporary; it’d only mask her issues until it wore off. He heard you request that they be cut off, but what if it actually came to something like that; surgery? The only other time you were ever meant to have surgery was at the Firefly hospital, St. Mary’s. Joel’s fists subconsciously tightened at the thought of you being on an operating table for something that wasn’t yet life threatening. What if Carson had never done a procedure like that before? What if you bled out? Then, another disturbing thought popped into his head. The doctor, assumingly a bit younger than himself, would probably try to manually pump her while sedated before deciding on a procedure. Another man’s hands on your chest, kneading and massaging them. Joel’s mind snapped out of it when you began to moan and whimper. His own hands, out of muscle memory, had already turned on the radio and tuned to the infirmary’s frequency. 

“Carson!” He let go of the button as he frantically waited for a response. “Neil!” He tried again. “Son of a bitch” He whispered under his breath. Joel contemplated whether he should make a run for it down to the infirmary or not.  “Can I help you?” Another, younger, man’s voice responded. “Where’s Carson?” “He’s in surgery right now and we just started. Is this urgent?” “Yes. Listen, this is Joel Miller and—” “I know who you are.” “My wife, she’s in severe pain.” “Is she dying?” “She’s pregnant!” “Is she in labor?” “No, but—” “You need to understand, there’s not many of us and it's all hands on deck for this surgery. I’m sorry.” “Listen, do y'all have a breast pump?" The man on the other line sighed as if he was too busy for this. "I don't think so. We did, but some couple checked it out already. The scavenging groups already know to be on the lookout for more." "Nothing?" Joel exclaimed desperately. “Sir, I will let Dr. Carson know about your situation post op, but he needs to focus. He hasn’t done a ruptured appendix since before. In the meantime, I will send someone to drop off some painkillers; something strong. Hopefully that will help until we can make it over.” Joel let out a weary sigh as he wiped a hand across his face. “Thank you.” He had no choice but to accept the reality. He dreaded going back to tell you the news, so he took his time heading downstairs to put some ice in a bowl.  “Is he coming?” You asked when Joel finally arrived at the bedroom door. He brought his eyes up to meet yours. They were apologetic as he shook his head. 

Joel knew something had to happen and it was now or never. You felt the bed sink as he laid on the other side of you. He sat up, hovering over you as much as he could and pulled back the damp towel. Your skin was less red, which Joel figured was a good thing. He reached his arm back to the end table beside the bed and grabbed a few cubes of ice. You watched as his veiny hands slid them up and down your skin. He would start up top, then slowly rub them in circular motions almost down to your nipples. Your skin was still very warm, so the ice wasn’t uncomfortable. As calloused as his were, the ice hardly affected his bare skin either. Your eyes were closed with your head laid back against the pillow as you tried to focus on relief. The melted beads of water dripped off the tip of your nipple onto your belly. Joel salivated, turned on by the extremely tempting thought to lick them off, but ultimately knew it was not the time. He even held back a deep moan that built up in his throat as he began to eye fuck you.

A faint knock barely pulled Joel’s concentration. “I think I heard someone at the door.” His voice came out low, almost raspy. “Here,” He grabbed your hand, leaving a chaste kiss on the palm before laying it on top of the ice that he left on your chest. “Keep going for me. That’d better be your medicine…”.  Joel swung the door open and only found a cloth tied up like a pouch by his feet. Opening it, he found 3 oval, white pills and a note: Acetaminophen. Take one every 8-12 hours. This should hold her. He brought them upstairs with a glass of water. Your eyes opened when he entered the room. Your wet hands pushed yourself up into a seated position. “Easy.” Joel warned warmly. “They melted.” “I’ve got more in this bowl for you.” “I like it better when you do it.” Joel smirked deviously. “I liked it better when I did it too. Now, how’re you feelin’? The pain.” “They still feel so heavy, but the pain isn’t as bad anymore. My skin is a little numb.” “Good, I reckoned we’d try cold instead since the hot towels were making my baby cry. I’ve got some pain killers for you too. This should last you the rest of the day.” He handed you the pill and water.

After a few moments, you scooched down to lay back and Joel took a couple more cubes of ice in his hands and repeated the earlier motions until they melted too. His hands stayed there against your skin. He felt the knots that clogged your ducts and began kneading them out in every direction.

Within the hour, the two of you felt the difference; The knots were dissipating. Trying something different, he cupped each breast in his palms, practically engulfing them. The pads of his fingers slid up and down your stretch marks, dragging your nipples between them. You hissed at the overstimulation rather than the previous stinging burn. Joel whispered sweet nothings in that Texan drawl that you fell in love with. He increased the pressure once you gave him the ok. A faintly audible moan of relief escaped your lips as a bead of milk began to form. Joel watched as it grew bigger until gravity allowed it to fall, like the melted ice, onto the back of his hand. He kept up his pace. Various consistencies leaked out until it became a steady trickle. His fingers moved down and began to knead your nipple with his thumbs, lubricating them in hopes that it would soften the calluses. They perked up at his touch. His hands began to cramp up a while ago, but the progress encouraged him to continue for a bit longer.

Joel abruptly stopped to reposition himself on the bed and give his hands a break. Laying on his side, he propped himself up with one hand and gently grasped the same breast with the other. Thinking he just needed a new angle to get comfortable, you finally let your eyes close to focus on the pending relief. 

Joel finally looked at you and found your face to be serene. It gave him the confidence to play on his previous thoughts. He gently lifted your soft breast and licked the underside curve until his tongue met your nipple. The pad of it applied pressure flat onto the perked tip until he heard you hiss again. His lips, then, fully wrapped around it. He stayed there like that for a moment, barely moving his tongue around you to give you a chance to adjust to the new sensation.

The feeling shot ripples of pain and pleasure through your body. You hardly moved, opting to stare straight up at the ceiling. As if given permission, Joel’s tongue began to circle your nipple more tightly. He watched your fingers grip the covers beneath you.

The flow of warm liquid was new to him. Instinctively, he let it slide down his throat. Joel would be lying if he said that it didn’t taste a bit sweet. He had long become accustomed to drinking his coffee black since acquiring beans was a luxury all on its own, but it reminded him of his favorite brand of creamer from before the outbreak. It brought his mind back to when things were normal. It was a comfortable and cozy feeling. He couldn’t help but feel weird about the connection that his brain was making, but he also couldn’t help this sort of primal urge for more; more nostalgia, more of you.

Joel was a mess or at least he was about to be. The sound of your whimpers and moans unleashed a flood of arousal to his cock. He realized that milk drunkenness was a real thing when it began to sneak up on him. If he wasn’t careful to keep some semblance of sobriety, he’d find himself making a mess in his pants in no time.

Between the rush of blood down south and the flow of milk down his throat, his body was becoming flushed with heat. He wanted to strip down right there and then, if not to relieve his own pressure but to tease you with his tip. He willed himself not to, however, because you still needed relief. He needed to focus on you not him.

The heat of his breath on your skin added to your own haziness. He had every intention of sucking you dry before moving on to the other, but he needed a breather. He didn’t realize that his beard was slightly wet until he rested his chin on the space between your breasts. You brought your fingers up to linger through his hair. 

“Look at me.” Joel panted, reaching up to tilt your head down. “How you feelin’, darlin’?” A medley of breathless whimpers was all you could muster as a response. Your mind was already mush and you wanted to keep it that way. The pain of the other breast was almost nonexistent; almost. Joel smirked. “Can you handle more?” He rubbed the side of your thigh as you nodded. “Say it.” “Yes.”

Expecting him to go straight to the other breast, he sat up and pulled his sweatshirt over his head and tossed it on the floor. Next, he slid your panties down your thicker thighs and let it fall in the same direction. He used his knee to spread your legs before splaying his fingers across your thighs to get a good grasp on them. With a little more aggression than he meant, Joel pulled your entire body down the bed so you could lay flat. Sliding a hand underneath the small of your back, he lifted you up just enough to place a couple of pillows under you for support. He, then, disappeared past where you could see and tucked his head between your thighs. You could hardly run your fingers through his hair in this position, but he easily managed to reach one hand up to grope your other breast.

He dragged his tongue flat across the length of your lower lips, settling onto the bud of nerves at the top. His other hand was preoccupied with making sure your legs stayed wide open for him. They always had a penchant for snapping shut around him, something he usually enjoyed. He knew his work was more sloppy when that happened, allowing himself to succumb to the mind swimming pleasure of being pussy drunk. That night, however, he wanted to focus on you more than revel in his own satisfaction. 

He continued to massage your engorged breast with your nipple rolling in between the tips of his fingers. Your clit revealed itself more as he blew cold air on it, giving him permission to take it completely into his mouth. His tongue swirled and sucked in a quick, continuous motion. He squeezed your nipple between his fingers harder, making you arch your back, until the dam broke. Enough of the clots had passed and now milk was streaming. A scream escaped your lips as you began to transition from pain to pure pleasure.

The motion of his tongue slowed, much to your dismay. As swiftly as he could, he switched spots. Your clit only ached and throbbed for a few moments before it found comfort between his slick and calloused fingers. Like your nipples, he squeezed and rolled.

Above, he continued to suck you dry like his life depended on it and it kind of did now that it was no longer a trickle. Beads of your creamy white dribbled through his beard and down his neck. You began to feel overstimulated before even reaching release. All you wanted as relief from the pressure, but you had to tap his shoulder to beckon him up and give you a break. What you saw in his eyes when they locked on to your was pure, feral lust. Despite his mouth now only hovering over your breasts, he allowed his fingers to continue. His eyes silently dared you to tell him to stop. Your hips continued to buck up into his hand. He adored the look on your face as you took him so well. The way your body reacted to his aroused him so much that he couldn't help but focus back onto his own building pressure. Joel repositioned himself a bit, straddling your one leg between his two and started to grind his hips up and down. The relief was minimal as he preferred to be inside you. He also preferred to be naked. The denim rubbing against your skin made you notice that he was still clothed from the waist down. Gently, you pushed him off, earning yourself the famous “Joel Glare”, something he couldn't help giving you as he didn't appreciate the immediate build up of pressure again. His eyes quickly softened and he felt a bit guilty as he picked up on your intentions when you began to unbuckle his jeans.

Joel fought the urge to help since it took you a moment, but opted to just enjoy the show as your fingers adorably fumbled over each other in anticipation. They gingerly brushed across the trail of dark hair on his lower stomach with all of your attempts. Still straddling your left thigh, he bit his lip at the sight. Finally undone, Joel took over to quickly get them all the way off, briefs included. When his cock sprung free, you saw that he’d already made a mess of himself with precum steadily dribbling out like a faucet not quite turned off. At that moment, you didn’t know what you wanted more, to take as much of him in your mouth as you could or guide him to your still wet cunt.

Luckily, he made the decision for you. “Eyes here.” He smirked, wanting your full attention. “Are you ready for me?” You laid back and nodded your head. “What'd I say? I need to hear that pretty, sexy voice of yours.” This was the most intimate he’d been with you in several months and his feelings were all coming to a head. “Yes! I need you so bad right now, please!” You desperately exclaimed. He lowered himself close to your ear for just a moment. "Your wish has always been my command, baby girl."

Abruptly, Joel turned you onto your side and threw aside the pillows. He replaced them as your support, allowing your body to lean back towards his. You felt the hair on his chest brush against your back. He slid his arm around your chest to pull you in closer. His fingers rolled between your nipple to milk out the last of it. Your insides were throbbing around nothing and you needed him to fill you, feel you; to know that what your body was doing was not of your own accord, but by his. All of your worries and self conscious thoughts were long gone. You didn’t care anymore; you were just horny for him.

He proceeded still with a bit of caution despite picking up on your body language, afraid you'd suddenly recoil from him. He could let himself go feral and fuck you into oblivion from behind, but thought this was a better position to start with; the two of you could always do work your way up to that later. With one hand slid between your thighs, he lifted your leg up. With his other, he stroked his cock a few more times to get it good and slick. It twitched with anticipation as he lined it with your entrance. 

Joel couldn’t help but release a low, guttural moan right in your ear just after the tip slid in. He wanted to cum so bad already and he didn’t even have the pleasure to be fully inside you yet. You didn’t even give him a moment to gather his bearings before you scooched backwards, sheathing him further inside. Your walls barely fluttered against him. He released, coating every inch of them in ropes of cum. Just like he did to you, you milked him dry. You kept a vice grip on him as your walls still pulsed to bring your own release even as you felt him soften. You forgot how amazing it felt to be so stuffed and full. 

Over and over, he huffed your name through breaths. His voice was deep and raspy. His hand struggled to find purchase on your body, not wanting to hurt you, so he could redirect his overstimulation. You felt his breath panting in your ear as he aggressively cupped your inner thigh. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He repeated as he finally began to come down. He peppered wet kisses behind your ear lobe. “Hmm?” Off in your own world. “I just need a moment to catch up. Then, we’ll finish. I promise.” “Take your time.” You said, feeling pretty relaxed none-the-less. Joel peaked over and watched as you tried to finish riding the wave to get yourself off.

You untangled your legs from his and repositioned yourself for better reach of your clit all with your eye closed. It amazed you how much you no longer cared about how you looked. All you wanted was to cum and you were fine if he didn’t get you there that time. You would make sure that he made it up to you later. He watched as your back arched up off the bed as much as it could despite being weighed down by your belly. Breathy whimpers escaped your lips. Your legs stiffly straightened while your toes curled as you found what you’d been looking for. The way you looked, the way you sounded; it was an experience Joel was privileged to behold and it quickly aroused him all over again.

Between your and his cum, you felt so filthy that you didn’t even want to move. Joel was too engrossed in gazing at you, even minutes after you caught your breath. He was usually punctual about aftercare, but still he laid there next to you. Without even turning to meet his gaze, your hand reached out to find his partially flaccid cock and began to gently play with it. Your goal wasn’t to get it back up just yet, but to just be blissfully intimate. His eyes followed your hand and watched you make contact. He hissed a bit when your nails dragged across his sensitive length. 

“Jesus woman, what are you doin’ to me?” He asked. “What are you doing to me?” You retorted with the same question with a giggle. “God, you're so beautiful." His low, roughly velvet voice stated lovingly. "Stop." You blushed with a shy grin which made him smile widely. "I must not be complimenting you enough if you still don't feel good about taking them." You shied away playfully by sliding away to the other side of the bed. Joel immediately scooched over to follow you, leaving his body flush against yours to spoon. "You never did that before.” Joel quipped in reference to masturbating in front of him. “Yes I have.” "Not with me. I never saw you touch yourself...like that. You usually wait for me to get my bearin's so I take care of you proper." "I do wait for you but I do also touch myself when you're not around." "Why didn't I know this?" "You jealous you're hands aren't the only one's touching me?" You joked. "Yes ma'am I am when you put it like that." "My hands are the next best things when you're not around. But if it's any consolation, I imagine they're yours." "You better be." He replied coyly. "But if it's any consolation to you, Darlin', I'll be around much more often, so you won't be needin' your imagination." He pinched your chin gently and turned your head to face him, taking your lips into his. It was a loving, drawn out sort of kiss. "How're ya feelin'? If you need me to go back in and...um...relieve some pressure for you," Joel cocked his brow and shrugged. "I'll take good care of you. And I don't want you gettin' all shy about it neither." He gingerly groped your breasts from behind. You turned around in his arms and cupped his face with your hand. “I think there's still some left for you to take care of but they don't hurt anymore. You did make me feel better just like you promised you would.” You leaned in for a kiss. If you weren’t completely grounded in that moment, you would have missed his bottom lip tremble a bit. The movement of your legs immediately reminded you of the mess that both of you made.  Joel heard the faint, tacky sound and whispered. “Don’t worry about that. I’ll get us cleaned up.” He began to roll away when you put your hand on his chest. “No, I’ll get up. I have to pee anyway.” “Nah, I’ma get up.” A grunt escaped his lips as he sat up. “Joel….” “I never made you clean up before and I sure as shit ain’t gon’ start makin’ you do it now.” His features softened and his voice deepened as he leaned down to reach your lips. “Am I understood?” You smirked. “Yes, sir.” He pecked your lips before slipping out of bed completely naked. You listened to the water run from the ensuite. Anticipation grew within you, as if it was your first time, as you waited. Joel clicked his tongue, announcing his return. “Dagum, you’re a fucking sight, you know that?” The left corner of his lips curled up as he gazed at how the sheets draped around your body.

Tenderly, he pulled the sheets away, spread your legs further apart and sat between them. Using two fingers, he circled your entrance with the soothing cloth. Your faint mewling did not miss his ears. 

In a clean transition, Joel removed the cloth from the equation. His middle and ring finger took one more lap around your labias before sliding inside of you. His thumb kneaded your still sensitive bud, causing a crescendo to begin building. Almost like a spasm, your hips bucked erratically in retaliation to his thick fingers going in deeper to find your spot. It hadn’t been touched in so long, you forgot how quickly he could find it; how well he knew your body. They slid in further, knuckles deep. The metal of his wedding band cooled your hot flesh. Your walls were clenching tight around his fingers. Always obliging, he went faster when you begged. He made sure to make you do that first, however. The way you begged so sweetly went straight to his cock and in almost no time, it was engorged and at attention again. He fit a third finger from his other hand inside you to gather enough slick to slide onto his shaft. Between both hands, Joel tried to keep an even rhythm, but knew he was getting sloppy. Your walls were beginning to contract erratically too. He knew it was time for everything to come to a head. 

“Alright, you ready for me?” Joel asked? “I’ve been ready! Joel, I'm gonna cum." Joel couldn’t help but chuckle at your bluntness. “Not yet, Darlin'. Get on your hands and knees.” He watched the shock on your face and couldn’t tell if it was from his fingers abruptly leaving you empty or because you hadn’t explored that position in a while. “C’mon baby,” He helped you up and around. “Ass up, front and center, now.” He positioned himself behind you, his warm hands massaging your ass before sliding them down your back to push you into the pillow. “I ain’t hurtin’ you, am I?” “Uh, uh.” You shook your head against the pillow. Your legs were snapped shut squeezing, not wanting your clit to die back down. He slapped your right cheek. “What was that?” “No!” You yipped in return. “You’re not hurting me.” “Gon’ tell me if I do, you hear me?” Joel could’ve sworn you called him daddy after you answered yes. It was all muffled by the pillow, but it was still enough for him.

He grabbed as much of your ass as he could in his hands. He loved how supple they felt in his hands. He gave a harsh squeeze as a test, to which you moaned. He stopped himself from spreading your legs apart and instead eased his cock in between your thighs. You felt how it just rubbed against your clit. Joel could’ve cum right there and then, but wanted to be inside you. That was his ultimate goal; his prize. He’d be damned if he let that opportunity slip again. 

With one hand gripping your hips and the other gripping your hair, he eased himself into you. It didn’t take long for him to gradually pick up the pace. His own hips rocked into yours harder and harder, waiting for you to protest but you never did. Your entire body rippled like a wave to his movement. It was the most intense amount of pressure you’d ever felt in your life between feeling like you had a bowing ball stuck inside you and your husband filling you up.

“Mmm” Joel grunted. “focus, now.” Your rhythm was becoming erratic again. His one hand was now splayed across your lower back. The muscles and veins in his arms flexed as his other gripped onto you tighter. “Yes! Like that, baby. Rock back into me.” “Oh fuck, Joel, please.” You exclaimed breathlessly. “Please what?” His excitement increased when you started to beg. “It's too much.” He began to slow down. “Does it hurt, baby? Want me to stop?” A bit of guilt flashed across his eyes.  “Don’t stop. Don’t slow down. It just…I feel so much. I feel like I’m about to explode but like a good explosion.” “That’s the goal, Darlin'. Matter of fact, don’t lose that feelin’ ‘cause I need you to cum for me. Right now.” “No…” You tried to catch your own breath. “No?” He almost took offense.  “I want to feel you first.” You intentionally squeezed around his dick harder. Joel bit his lip and grunted as he fought against his own climax. He almost had to laugh through the pain of holding back. “I don’t think you’ve ever told me no before.”  “Guess there’s a first for everything. Please?” Your voice was so innocent; how could he deny you?  “You know what you gotta do then, right?” “Whatever you want.” “Call me that again.” “Call you what?” “What you said in the pillow there. Thought I didn’t hear you?” “I wanted you to hear me, daddy.” “Fuck me…What am I gonna do with you?” Joel edged himself as much as he could. He wanted to ride the build up just a moment longer. You teased him, saying it again, knowing that you had him in the palm of your hand. “You like that, huh?" “Maybe.” His brows furrowed in concentration as he tried his best. He blew air out between puckered lips to try and steady himself, but it was of no use. His glass overfilled and he had no choice but to let it spill. “I’m cumming, baby. Fuck!”

Though his movements were faster, his hips snapped erratically into you. He didn’t care about rhythm when his mind was going black due to the vice grip you had on him. All his body could focus on was the explosion of hot, sticky cum uncontrollably flooding out of him. You bellowed out this beautiful whine that made his dick, already a sloppy mess, twitch. His hips slowed down as your grip around him loosened. All but the head slid out. He wanted to stay in a little longer when he collapsed onto your back, but between both of your slick, it wasn’t easy.

Not wanting your back to ache, he allowed himself only a moment of rest before sliding out and straightening up. Joel’s eyes caught the translucent cream sliding down your leg. You felt his tongue lap it all the way back up to your entrance. Your weak legs trembled at the touch. “Whoa, steady now.” His hands held your hips before guiding your body to lay back down on your side. While up, he grabbed the cloth and quickly cleaned the two of you up again. 

He couldn’t wait to get back into bed with you after tossing the cloth in the sink. Spooning you from behind, his body fit around yours like a glove. You let him wrap his arms around you and pull you in closer.

[tsukasalvr]

DW GUYS I HAVENT FORGOTTEN ABT TUMBLR!!!

Abt reqs…

I have some already done but I’m not posting them till I’m done w ALLLLLLLL of them and I have like 40+😭😭

But I’ve also been busy w issues abt me I’m reconnecting w my ex and im trying to be more open abt my past relapses and addictions and my ed and sh and etc. to ppl I love and am close to so it’s been draining a lil cus it’s not easy but I’m doing a lil better!!! My ex has been there a ton for me and I am for them too (and we both know we still like each other after 6 months no contact) but we had a tough convo last night where I talked abt my sa some time after in January and they talked abt their experience after too and how they werent doing well either as they went back to old ways but we r trying to become sober together bc we rlly do make each other happy and clean and love each other lots

ALSO I GRADUATED HIGHSCHOOL AND IM 18 NOW!!!! Sooooo fun!! I started this tumblr in my freshman year when I was 14 in 2020 so it’s sooo crazy to me so ty to those who’ve been here for a LOOOOONG time love u all💕💕 I’m trying to get ready for university and also having lots of trips planned and also having my ex live w me and my family sometimes for a bit when they move for university too so it’s kinda harddd

Anyways still doing reqs so dw and feel free to message me whenever or send reqs still im still active 💕also u can def tell in my early works I was 14 😭😭☠️☠️

[criphd]

this is belated but bc it has been another full year i thought i should write out some stuff i did in it as a reminder of my progress& my hard work !: (this is definitely not chronological lol)

read almost ? the whole of 1909's women's columns in justice [abt 35% of the material]

had a big meeting with ppl in the department abt my health & what to do which was good !!

went to a women's grassroot's activism conference specifically to see june hannam & karen hunt talk, but there was some interesting stuff on feminist community builiding aside from my faves

checked thru some of commonweal to see if they had a women's column [ofc no] & what women were contributing [mostly translation, eleanor marx for a while was writing the international notes section]

transcribed like... 10 - 20% of the columns i've read for quotations n better archiving

started writing about 'justice', the 'working class feminist everyday' & freed myself a little from the worry abt 'not being literary enough'

i had an another apr like .... 6 months from the last one which was a bit crazy but it went rly well ! i submitted the beginnings of what would become my draft chapter, & had a great panel meeting abt my work n what i'm doing :)

went to see the play underdog twice lol

experienced the worst pain flare of my entire life lol but survived it & did not kill myself !!! literally i have had an insane health year !!

i submitted my biggest, most complicated & important piece of work yet: a very draft chapter about women's columns in socialist newspapers & the identity & ideology work they do for socialist women/socialist feminism [it was 13600 words]

made some more friends !! :)

came up against the difficulty of finding resources about women of the second international [in english, but also in general they are sooo erased + ignored :(]

had around 9 supervisions

finally got a fucking not awful chair at my desk on campus !! and a laptop stand ! just wish they would give me a mouse lol

read a bunch of natalia ginzburg

became kinda obssessed with chartism lmao... thanks mike sanders ! & ella !

felt a lot more confident & like i have the capacity to be coherent about my research & that's rly lovely :)

went to a talk abt abortion access & travel between the netherlands & germany in terms of reproductive rights

managed to maintain a short term writing routine which bodes well for me :)

fell in love with lina murray

took a month long deeply needed break

:) so yh ! it's been so tough but it's also happening !