#sondheim goes too far you know?

[nearisqueer]

once more i am spreading awareness for my favourite musical theatre video of all time.

[hopeymchope]

Naegiri One-Shot: Lyrical - "What Can You Lose?"

Lyrical - What Can You Lose? on AO3

Lyrical - What Can You Lose? on Fanfiction.Net

Summary: Late one night, Makoto Naegi is pacing the halls of Hope's Peak when he hears someone playing the piano in the Music Room. Upon investigating, he eventually learns that he and Kaede Akamatsu are being kept awake by similar struggles.

Intro Note: Happy Naegiri Week 2023, everybody. The story below (under the cut) takes place in the "Ultimate Talent Development Plan" timeline where the cast of V3 is the 79th Class of Hope's Peak.

I hope you don't mind taking your Naegiri with a side dose of Saimatsu...

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In the Music Room at Hope's Peak Academy, Kaede Akamatsu was seated at the piano with her eyes closed. She was playing a slow, somber-sounding piece of music without looking at the sheet propped up in front of her. And she was so focused on what she was playing that she didn't notice when the door to the room opened.

Makoto Naegi cleared his throat loudly, which got the desired reaction from Kaede. She stopped playing immediately and spun around to see him standing by the door, gently shutting it behind him.

Kaede blushed, thrown off by the visitor. "Oh!"she said. "Uh, h-hi, Naegi-senpai! I-I was-"

"Sorry if I'm interrupting," Makoto said, smiling politely. "I just heard the music, and I-"

"-Wondered who was playing the piano at this hour?" Kaede finished, smiling back as she attempted to regain her composure.

"Of course I suspected it'd be you, Akamatsu-san," Makoto told her. "You're the first person that comes to mind when I hear the piano playing in here. But also because that music didn't sound something Maizono-san or Mioda-senpai would play. Compared to their tastes, this sounded far softer and a lot... well, sadder."

Kaede beamed when she responded. "You're right about that. It's a piece by Stephen Sondheim - he was a famous American lyricist and composer. He wrote the music for a lot of famous Broadway shows like Into the Woods and Sweeney Todd. Plus he did the lyrics for West Side Story and Gypsy." She began to speak faster, her eyes lighting up. "He has so many awards and so much respect that theater musicians call him a god of the industry, and he was an incredible jazz-style pianist, too! Oscar Hammerstein was a surrogate father to him and mentored him, so he was brought up by one of the all-time greats in musical theater, surrounded by the most extraordin-... uh, extraordinary... "

She cut herself off and closed her eyes. After a deep breath, she said "Sorry" in a soft voice. "I can get carried away when it comes to music."

"Don't be sorry," Makoto told her. "I love your passion. It's awesome — admirable, even! Besides, trust me: I know how easy it is to get worked up when you really feel gung-ho about something."

Kaede regarded him skeptically. "I realize I don't know you that well, senpai, but... I somehow have a hard time picturing you getting 'worked up' or 'gung-ho.' What brings that out in you?"

He glanced sideways and laughed a little. "I suppose what mostly gets me going is unfairness? As in, things that feel... unjust."

"Well, the song I was just playing is from a movie that might be up your alley, then," Kaede said with a grin. "It's an American film based on a 1930s comic strip from their newspapers - Dick Tracy."

Makoto shrugged. "Can't say I'm familiar."

"It's about this old-fashioned, good-hearted detective who always follows the rules even as he goes up against all these weird, grotesque gangsters who break every law in the city," Kaede told him. "Sondheim didn't work on many movies, but he won an Oscar for his work on Dick Tracy."

"It's about a detective, huh?" Makoto said, looking up at the ceiling. He blinked a couple of times, thinking to himself before he returned his attention to Kaede. "So why does the song sound so sad?"

"Oh, right" Kaede said, sounding as if she only now remembered him observing that earlier. "Well, it's called What Can You Lose, and it's about this character whose been carrying feelings for someone else for a while, but he doesn't know if they've noticed or cared. He's trying to figure out whether he should just tell her."

Makoto face momentarily appeared shocked. But after the shock passed, his expression became determined. "I see," he said. "Would you play it for me?"

Kaede smiled gratefully. "Of course! Although I have to admit it loses something without the accompanying lyrics."

Rubbing his chin with one hand, Makoto pushed to add, "Then could you sing it, too?"

"Wha-what?!" Kaede blurted through sudden laughter. "I'm... I'm not much of a singer! Besides, it's designed as a duet."

"You're being modest," Makoto suggested sympathetically.

"I'm not!" Kaede responded emphatically.

Makoto chuckled to himself again "This duet - do you mean it has parts for both a guy and a girl?"

"Yes... "

"Then I'll do the male vocals," Makoto suggested, smiling warmly. "I'm not any good either, so you should feel more comfortable that way."

As he moved to stand behind and to the side of her spot on the piano bench, Kaede looked befuddled. "I mean, I guess I do sing along with the piano sometimes... in private, that is. And I can carry a tune decently, sure. But this? This is just-"

Makoto interrupted by saying, "Look: I really want to hear it. Okay?"

Kaede stared, shaking her head slowly as she paradoxically said "Okay... "

She turned, cleared her throat, and tried to focus on the sheet music in front of her. "Can you read music, though?" she ventured.

"I can read enough, I think," Makoto said uncertainly, rubbing the back of his head.

"Okay... " Kaede repeated, quieter this time.

She did her best to ignore the boy standing there as she began to run her fingers over the keys.

When the time came, Makoto's voice came out as a firm but unpolished tenor:

What Can You Lose? Only The Blues... Why Keep Concealing, Everything You're Feeling? Say It To Her... What Can You Lose? Maybe It Shows, She's Had Clues — Which She Chose To Ignore Maybe Though She Knows, And Just Wants To Go On As Before... As A Friend, Nothing More. So She Closes The Door.

Then Kaede's voice came in with its sweet, high pitch.

Well If She Does, Those Are The Dues...

And together, they began to share the lyrics.

Once The Words Are Spoken, Something May Be Broken Still You Love Her; What Can You Lose?

But What If She Goes? At Least Then You Had Part Of Her... What If She Had To Choose?

Leave It Alone... Hold It All In... Better or Boned Don't Even Begin With So Much To Win... There's Too Much To Lose.

Shortly after she finished playing the last few notes, Kaede smiled and sat back, taking a deep breath before she spoke. "Um, sorry for my voice cracking," she said. "I did warn you that I'm not much of a singer." She turned back to look at him.

Makoto was looking away from her now, his back to her. "Uh, yeah, same here?" he said awkwardly. His voice wavered as he continued, "I kinda choked on those lyrics a couple times... "

"I thought you sounded very sweet," Kaede assured him. However, the look on her face had shifted to one of her concern as a result of both the tone in Makoto's voice and the fact that he was still facing away from her. "I don't want to pry or anything," she ventured, "But... are you okay?"

"Damn it," he muttered emphatically, speaking mostly to himself. He turned back towards her and rolled his eyes — making it evident that they were welling with tears. "Guess I lost it somewhere along the way."

Kaede's hand flew up to cover her mouth in shock. "Oh god, you don't have anxiety about performing, do you? You really didn't need to do that! I tried to-"

Makoto waved away her concerns, laughing nervously. "No, it's not that. The song just... really struck a nerve." He wiped the tears from his eyes using the sleeve of his hoodie.

Hearing that, Kaede lowered the hand from her face and brought her hands together in front of her. "Isn't that beautiful, though?" she asked, enthused all over again. "The way that music can make people feel so strongly... " She closed her eyes and sighed. "It can be challenging, cathartic, or even make us confront emotions we've been avoiding within ourselves."

Makoto was slightly confused by her sudden enthusiasm in this face of his tears, but he just scratched his cheek lightly and nodded a bit. "I guess that's true, yeah," he muttered.

Seeing his reaction, Kaede's smile turned sheepish. "Sorry if that came out kind of weird," she offered. "Guess I got carried away again. People don't call me the 'Piano Freak' for nothing."

Makoto sniffed, still fighting back his emotions. Nevertheless, he managed to smile back at her. "Like I said before, your passion is a great thing," he told her. "There's nothing 'freak'-ish about it. That's just rude and uncalled for."

"Thank you, senpai," Kaede said genuinely. "And, truth be told, you caught me playing this song because... I can relate to it, too."

His smile tightened. "Then I'm sorry to hear that," he said. "Is that what's keeping you up so late?"

She avoided his gaze. "Something like that," she admitted. "The same questions keep running through my head."

"Then we're in the same boat," he expressed with a sympathetic smile.

Keade looked back at him, regarding him silently for a moment before speaking again. "Frustrating, isn't it?"

"Yeah... " Makoto said softly. He seemed to be looking through her, his mind wandering for a few seconds. However, his expression soon brightened. "But hey," he suddenly added, speaking more clearly. "Maybe your person is just clueless."

Kaede turned to look back at the piano and fingered a couple of keys idly. "I sort of doubt it," she said over the tink-tink sounds. "Picking up on clues is kind of his whole thing."

"Well that sounds painfully familiar," Makoto said, deadpan.

"Yours too?" Kaede asked, looking back at him with genuine surprise. Suddenly, she spun around in her seat. "Wait, don't tell me!" She held both hands in front of her as if she could psychically freeze him in place before she went on: "You're trying to let them know how you feel without explicitly saying it, and they're someone who's usually great at reading people. But even so, they haven't reacted to what you're doing. So now you can't tell if they're really uninterested or just totally oblivious in this one way." Her hands dropped into her lap. "Is that it?"

At that, Makoto had to laugh. "Aside from the fact that I'm trying my hardest not to send any signals, that's exactly what it's like with her. Besides, I'm a pretty open book. I'm probably sending her signals whether I want to or not. And if that's true, what would it mean?" His face fell once more. "Has she avoided confronting my feelings because she wishes they didn't exist and would prefer not to deal with them?" He paused only a second before answering his own question: "I think that's a solid probably." His smile returned, though now it was a smaller and sadder one.

Kaede mirrored his expression. "You can't be sure of what she's thinking. You shouldn't give up hope."

"I know," Makoto said, giving her a nod. "And I won't. Despite my best efforts, I just... I can't seem to shake that hope. I can't stop wanting more between us."

Kaede stood up from the piano bench. "Why do you want to shake it?" she asked, looking back over her shoulder at him.

Makoto shoved his hands into his pockets and looked away. "To protect myself, I guess. Like the song said: 'There's too much to lose.'"

After turning around to face him, Kaede gave a solemn nod. "I get that."

He looked back at her. "You can't bring yourself to tell him either, huh?"

Kaede's eyes drifted upward as she drew in a long breath. "I... " she began. "I... I've stepped right up to that line, if you know what I mean. I've been at the door, and I gave it a good, long look," she said, barely suppressing an embarrassed giggle over her own metaphor. Then she paused, lost in thought for a few moments. Quietly, she concluded "It feels like I've done everything but tell him."

"Sometimes it's hard to notice what's going on right in front of us," Makoto suggested.

Kaede threw him a lopsided smile. "Speaking from experience?"

"Not romantic experience — but yeah," Makoto admitted, chuckling ruefully.

"Can't that apply to your person, too?" Kaede asked. She clasped her hands behind her back. "Isn't there a chance she can't see the forest for the trees?"

He immediately shook his head. "No. At least... I don't think so."

"You can't be certain, though."

"Of course not," Makoto said.

She shifted her stance, moving to fold her arms in front of her. "How long have you known this girl?"

"About a year and a half now," he responded.

Kaede leveled a concentrated gaze at him. "Do you mind if I ask you something kind of personal?"

Makoto blinked rapidly, surprised by the sudden shift in her tone. "I mean, uh — maybe?" he said, feeling nervous. "It depends."

"On what?" Kaede pressed, her face relaxing.

He raised one hand up to his chin. "Just... ask yourself whether you'd be comfortable with me asking you the same thing. And if so? Fire away."

She froze, letting her eyes drift around the room as she considered that. "Okay," she murmured to herself once before repeating it louder: "Okay. Fine."

Makoto's brow furrowed as he unconsciously tensed his body in anticipation.

Kaede's face returned to the concentrated look she'd had a moment before. "We've been talking vaguely about what we feel or whatever, but level with me here: Are you in love with this person?"

In response, Makoto closed his eyes and let out a ragged breath. "I try not to think about that," he said quietly. "I've been doing my best not to put a label on what I'm feeling, if that makes any sense."

Kaede turned her head slightly. "But if you had to?"

He opened his eyes again and slowly nodded. "I think... yes. No, that's wrong — I don't just think it." He sighed heavily. "I am. And I've probably known I am for a long time, on some level."

Kaede relaxed both her expression and posture. She smiled sympathetically before gently asking, "Don't you think she deserves to know that?"

Makoto lowered his head and raised his right hand to cover his eyes. He drew his fingers together slowly, pinching the bridge of his nose with his eyes shut tight. "You're... probably right," he said weakly.

Still smiling, she went on: "Even if she can tell you're crushing on her, that doesn't mean she knows how deep your feelings are. Besides — you already admitted you aren't certain whether she knows any of it." She looked down at the floor. "I think you should tell her," she concluded.

After dropping his hand from his face and raising his head to look at her again, Makoto smirked. "You should follow your own advice," he said.

She looked back and him and scoffed. "Easier said than done."

"Of course," he agreed. "It's always easier to tell someone else to go out on that limb than to do it yourself. But now it's your turn."

"Huh?" Kaede said, visibly confused.

"I mean it's your turn to answer the question you asked me," he clarified. "Are you in love with him?"

Kaede visibly flinched at the question. "Urrrrrrr... "

Makoto smiled a little. "Come on," he said teasingly, "You knew this was coming."

Casting her eyes downward again, Kaede spoke haltingly. "I.. don't know. Really." She cleared her throat. "I like him a lot... the time we spend together, it means so much to me." Starting to look up, she shook her head once. "But I've only known him a few months!"

Makoto's hand was again poised below his chin with his other arm wrapped underneath.. "There aren't time constraints on these things," he said softly. "There's not some required waiting period on your feelings. And you don't have to decide what you feel before some arbitrary date passes, either."

She shut her eyes. "Good!" she declared a bit louder than she'd intended. She reopened her eyes and lowered her voice before going on: "I'm just lost because... I've never been in love with anyone," she admitted. "Unless I am now, I suppose." She reached across her body with her left hand and grabbed onto her right forearm before looking back at Makoto. "Have you?" she asked. "Did you feel this way about someone else before her?"

Despite opening his mouth, Makoto hesitated before answering. After a long pause, he simply said, "No."

Kaede's face scrunched up in confusion. "Then how're you so sure you are now?" she demanded.

Makoto smiled gently and chuckled. "Look, I obviously don't know much about this stuff," he warned. "Coming to me for advice about love is like asking Iruma-san for etiquette tips."

She laughed. "I hear you," Kaede said. "But you sounded so certain. So, how?"

"I can only tell you what I believe," he said. "So maybe take this with a grain of salt." He took a deep breath as he gathered his thoughts. "So... I believe love is one of those things that... when you know, you just know. At least that's how it is for me. When you made me confront and define my feelings, it seemed really obvious." He half-shrugged. "But that doesn't mean it has to be the same for you — or anybody else for that matter. Besides, does it really matter what you call your feelings or how you define them? Don't pressure yourself to make it something specific."

Kaede listened quietly while shifting her weight between her feeet as he spoke. When he was finished, she nodded. "I guess you're right," she said. "And maybe I'm just stuck because I've had-" She cut herself off and looked sideways. "Heh — no, forget it. You'd just laugh at me."

"I swear to you that I won't," Makoto said sincerely.

Kaede looked back and smiled gratefully. "Well... I had this idea in my head of what it would feel like to be in love one day, you know? I always thought it would feel, to me, kind of like the first time I listened to Robert Schumann's 'Fantasie in C,' Opus 17. Does that... ?"

Makoto was already shaking his head. "Sorry, but I don't know it."

"No, that's okay," Kaede said, laughing a little. "I should play it for you some time. It's a solo piano piece that's somehow grand and intimate at the same time. Powerful yet gentle. Frantic but tender." She looked away. "He wrote it for the love of his life. And to me, it sounded like what love must feel like. At least that's what I thought. But what I feel now is... this is completely unrecognizable."

He gave her a sympathetic look. "I'm not sure if anyone can expect or predict what it'll feel like until they're in the middle of it," he theorized. "I just mean... different people experience things differently."

"Makes sense," Kaede said.

He tilted his head. "One more question," he said. "How would you feel if he suddenly wasn't in your life anymore?"

Kaede's face fell immediately. "Horrible... " she said, nearly whispering. "Devastated?"

With a fresh smile, Makoto nodded once. "Maybe you can start there," he suggested.

Her eyes darted back and forth as though searching for his logic. "Start with what?" she asked.

"Start by telling him that," he said simply. "It's more than enough."

She grimaced. "I don't know... " she said. "But... maybe." She looked around the room, considering.

"Just think about it," Makoto said gently. He gestured towards the clock on the wall. "Though maybe you should save the thinking for tomorrow? It's pretty late. We should both be trying our best to sleep."

"Yeah, I know you're right," she conceded. "I hope we can think more clearly in the morning." Smiling once more, she warned him, "This isn't the end of this, though! I'm going to keep encouraging you until you finally tell her everything."

"Oh, yay?" he said uncertainly, lightly chuckiing. He began to move towards the door. "But I'll be cheering you on, too," he added. When he reached the door, he looked back over his shoulder. "And thank you. For the talk, I mean."

"Anytime."

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End Note: I originally wrote 2/3 of this story in the summer of 2021 before abandoning it. At the time, I decided it wasn't a very good or interesting premise. And honestly, I'm still not sure it is... but when I saw this year's "Lyrical" prompt for Naegiri Week, my mind came back to this one, and I thought "Wouldn't it be nice to have something to post this year?" So I spent a few days completing this story and polishing it up. I hope it was worth your time.

[cannotfly]

🔥Stephen sondheim

s.end in the c.lowns is by far not the best song from musical theater

oh, i kid! i know what you came here for ( but i stand by that point, sitc is a fine enough song but i just can't get behind people saying it's "the best in musical theater" ). sondheim has a huge female character problem. you put the general issue into words much better than me so i'm here to focus on the female characters of s.weeney t.odd. in just about every interview i find of his talking about this musical, the focus is on the music and the male characters. this doesn't seem too strange at first since this is a very male-heavy show. which isn't necessarily a bad thing. it is based off the bond play so sondheim wasn't the one orchestrating that choice. what gets weird is when you realize that when he does have something to say about lucy and johanna, it's not very nice.

the biggest indicator of this for me came while reading an interview he did in the early 2000s ( they were in talks of a movie with b.urton directing so i know it was before then ) where he states that he wanted to make johanna less of a heroine and more ditzy and crazy. now, let's examine the two other female characters in this show. lovett is an obsessive and possessive butcher who encourages todd to kill and was the one who proposed the pie idea. not a very good person. lucy/the beggar woman is mentally deranged. already, we have two "crazy" women in this show. it doesn't have a very good look if you view all three of the female characters in your show as crazy and little more than that. yes, most of the characters in this show are not exactly mentally well, however, male-character-wise there's still anthony and even bamford. both of which are still deemed "sane." it's an interesting aspect.

but this also shows that it seems like sondheim just didn't have a lot of respect for his female characters. johanna shoots fogg because he is threatening her and anthony. in the script that this musical is based off of, fogg is literally about to slit anthony's throat before johanna shoots him. johanna is the heroine. she's the final girl who survives the serial killer at the end. somehow sondheim didn't notice this? he accidentally wrote himself a strong, female character. he tried changing lyrics and songs to make her look more stupid yet the final product still shows her strength, her anxiety and her courage. he just refused to also show her brilliance.

he does, however, adore lovett. he has nothing bad to say about her. he criticized johanna's actions, but lovett's out-right cannibalism? nothing bad about that. i wouldn't be surprised if this is due to his bias with a.ngela l.ansbury, though. but it's still a problem.

this goes further when making the movie. he and burton wanted to reduce johanna and lucy's time on screen as much as possible. he also wanted to remove wait until h.bc talked him out of it. he cut a good chunk of greenfinch, cut kiss me, cut practically all of the beggar woman's moments aside from the quartet and her death, and most importantly, he cut johanna getting shooting fogg. this was a decision between him and burton, but he had absolutely no qualms about diminishing their roles at all. he even turned on his most beloved lovett in the end.

much of her personality is lost in the musical from the bond play. in the play, she sasses turpin right to his face. she gets to cry after shooting fogg because killing someone is traumatic even in self-defense. her strength is subtle, but very much there. sondheim's whole goal seemed to be ripping that away from her. from lyrical changes to calling her the typical blonde girl in a horror movie to gleefully cutting her role out of the 2007 movie as much as possible, he was trying his hardest to make her seem stupid and get everyone else to turn on her.

what's concerning is that it seems to have worked. several portrayals of johanna seem to be influenced by his words and portrayals of actresses before them. the community throws lucy and johanna out the window constantly. they have been called stupid and victim-blamed. fortunately, the extremities of this fandom have died out, but it is still very obvious that they are trying to kick them out of the narrative. i'm not saying this has to do partly with sondheim's perceptions of them, however, i wouldn't be surprised if it was involved.

in a show where there's only three female characters, it's brow-rising at best when you try to stomp them out; by taking away their scenes or making them look stupid.

[sitpwgs]

Back for Part 2! Gosh..I think the Ragtime casting is so amazing too and I think Joshua Henry will be so great in this role. Haha wow..I remember watching the bootleg and being pretty impressed with the prologue especially. I do find the show a bit confusing or hard to follow so I couldn't imagine going in blind omg. There's just a lot of characters and stuff going on but I can totally see why you cried. Now thinking about it, I might have cried at Wicked or Hadestown..maybe Rent or Color Purple but not sure. It wouldve only been a few tears though and maybe like awe for seeing the show..idk. I'm not really a crier I guess. I remember my sister crying when we watched Finding Neverland bootleg though. Can't wait to hear about the Notebook experience!

I honestly don't remember much about Gypsy except Mama Rose so I'm not too interested in the rest of the cast honestly but she would be great! I only remember a few songs from the musical and can barely remember any other characters singing lol. But I do think Audra will be a star and give it her all so I'm still excited. This is why I like revivals..it reminds me about shows I've forgotten about lol. I am really hoping The Last Five Years will be good..it's the opposite where that's a show I know all of it well mostly cuz it's sung through. I did get pretty used to the movie and Jeremy singing the songs and I think Nick Jonas might not be that bad with these songs or too far from that. I mean..it's not as difficult as Les Mis and maybe he's improved from that or since then lol. Adrienne's voice does not seem very much like Cathy though so I guess we will see. I agree The staging and it only being two people will be hard to do on Broadway and mainly just by yourself singing songs. What else is the stage design supposed to look like or have on it..so things like that, but maybe it doesn't matter too much. Idk what they usually do either.

Those are nice choices! I am not as familiar with some of these shows..I can barely remember Drowsy Chaperone and am only familiar with a few songs from Secret Garden and Wild Party. But your Bridges choice seems great lol and A Chorus Line would be interesting. It is hard to think of older shows to revive sometimes but somehow they are doing Sunset Boulevard again after only like 6 years I think back in 2017 so you never know. I would pick Passion for another Sondheim musical and wonder how that would be since all Sondheim revivals seem successful.

I was enjoying both of these but honestly haven't been reading so I might read more today and tomorrow. My favorite tropes are second chance romance, friends to lovers, right person wrong time, love triangles if it makes sense, and like star crossed lovers forbidden love or secret relationships and poor boy loves rich girl lol. I also like stories that describe the whole characters relationship and how it got there. I'm a fan of past and present timelines mostly. I'm not really a fan of fake dating at all. In YA, I like a lot of mental health and more tragic stuff though and stories about friendships and families. What about you?

So at first I thought the casting was for Beach read and wasn't sure about it but I guess People we Meet on Vacation fits more. I'm not familiar with either of them so I really don't know. But I can try to finally finish the book and maybe try to picture them as the characters so it's like a movie. I'll see how that goes since I only know him from Ballad of Songbirds and he had another hair color lol. I hope it's good cuz they were approved by Emily I think. I also just found out that Every Summer After will have a sort of sequel about the characters brother romance and idk how to feel about it but I guess I'm looking forward to it. I'm enjoying this one but I think Every Summer After would still be my favorite but this didn't seem similar to me. I still haven't read Meet Me at the Lake so maybe will read that will people we Meet too, since that was announced as a movie a while ago too. I guess I'm happy about it cuz I always like romance movies anyway haha.

I honestly don't know what Taylor will do for the recordings either. Both options sort of make sense, but I think I agree with you. my sister even said today and we agreed since we already had a new album, she wouldn't mind waiting a year instead of nothing to look forward to next year when tour is over. I know people might want them done or as soon as possible, but I don't really mind. Well she already announced Speak Now TV and 1989 TV on tour..so I think she would again if it's that soon and of course I would be excited. I agree with your Collab choices too even if I'm not sure which will happen. I could totally see Maggie Rogers or Halsey for rep though. I'm so happy for Maisie and Holly for opening, and could even see them as good choices for debut too haha but she might want to keep it country people. I don't think Kacey likes Taylor though and not sure how their voices would be.

I finally listened to Clairo and enjoyed it. She kinda has a specific sound and voice that makes her music unique. I've listened to Gretta Ray a little bit..maybe I should listen more. I think she's okay but maybe too similar to Maisie to me. I also listened to Kacey's deluxe album which was fine but I think she picked the right songs on the album and they all started sounding alike. This week I am also focused on listening to Beabadoobee's album who also opened for Taylor! I would say this album is almost similar vibes to Taylor and softer than her previous albums. I wasn't impressed at first since I prefer some rock and guitar but it's growing on me now. The song Coming Home kinda had a similar feeling to Sweet Nothing and I really liked her song Beaches which was a good mix of her two styles. If you like Bea, i'd say Soccer Mommy is pretty similar actually! Like she does rock but also has some softer songs and I have a feeling her new album might be like that too. I just love her for her super relatable lyrics and vibes. I can try to give some recommendations if you want too. My favorite color is still pink but I changed it to green in 6th grade for some reason and I feel like it is an underappreciated color. Clearly I was always meant to be a Wicked Stan! I love saying pink goes good with green cuz those are the two colors I wear the most haha. Also omg how were the concerts? That's so cool and fun..I'd love to see Olivia live. Do you have any tips or anything since I am going to my concert next week? I will also send a review after. Actually tour starts tonight and I'm going to try to avoid spoilers if I can! I hope you have an awesome trip in New York if I don't talk to you again!!!

replying under the cut <3

i actually don't know a whole lot about gypsy either so you can take my sondheim stan card away haha. i love revivals but i wish sometimes they were a little more innovative and different! i tend to be a revival enjoyer unless it's like, the recent west side story revival haha. i'm really intrigued by the last five years, and my brain keeps wanting to classify it as a revival but no!! it's a new musical! it's never had a broadway transfer. it'll be interesting to see how it does stacked up against everything else! ooh i would love a passion revival! i think we should always have a sondheim show running on broadway 🙂‍↕️

oh i am so sleepy but i will give you some recs hehe:

second chance romance: this is everything 2 me. i loveeee second chance romance. and also i don't have a lot of good second chance romance recs ASIDE FROM PERSUASION the og :( everything i've ever read that's second chance tends to disappoint me.

friends to lovers: love, rosie (movie), where rainbows end (book love rosie is based off of), people we meet on vacation (book), when harry met sally (movie, perfection), the flatshare (book)

right person wrong time: MY FAVORITE TROPE ......... unfortunately have yet to find it in a book that i think is good enough but. once (movie/musical, which you obviously know). roman holiday (movie). oh it's everything to me. i guess normal people (book, tv) if you squint. kind of.

love triangles: i cannot think of a single love triangle book right now i am so sorry

star crossed lovers/forbidden love/secret relationships: also blanking on this one

poor boy loves rich girl: i don't have any rec recs here for books or movies but if you ever want to suffer through 6 terrible seasons of gossip girl (my beloved) for dan and blair (my most beloved) they're perfect to me i will not take criticism on this one. in hindsight i would also put normal people here.

also have i pitched the seven year slip to you? i'm sorry if i have! i am very sleepy haha. which i think you can tell from the jumbled reply here but i wanted to reply before your concert!!!! anyways, it's perfect and i do think you'd like it it's kind of adjacent to a lot of these tropes but not quite. but i love it dearly.

some of my favorite tropes: right person wrong time, second chance romance, friends to lovers (similar to you)! i don't mind fake dating; i actually love most tropes if done well and especially if they manage to put their own spin on things!

i didn't know every summer after is getting an adaptation!! that'll be interesting! i loveee a good romance movie! especially rom coms! we need the like 90s-2000s rom com movement back!

do we think she's announcing rep tv tomorrow? i guess by the time you see this and reply we'll know! part of me wants to say yes but i really don't think it's going to happen tomorrow. we'll see though! i feel like i keep seeing more things that make me go hmmm maybe and then i'm like no never mind i think she's just messing with us. i would love a maggie collab — i think about her cover of tim mcgraw all the time! i still haven't listened to the new halsey songs, i should do that soon! i'm so proud of holly and maisie both for opening :") i watched both sets on livestream and was just so so happy for them both. andddd yeah i don't think kacey likes taylor much haha

i loveee the new clairo. it's just so good! and gretta and maisie are friends so it makes sense that you think they're similar — and maisie sings backup on one of gretta's songs :) i haven't listened to new kacey yet, but i did listen to the new beabadoobee last week and enjoyed it. i haven't listened to it again since though and i don't think any particular track really stuck with me unfortunately but it is a solid album/listen-through. i also finally listened to the new hozier! i'll check out soccer mommy! i've heard good things but haven't yet! and in return, have you listened to alessi rose? i really like her ep and have been playing that quite a bit lately! that and the new del water gap deluxe songs :) oh and skullcrusher! you know i'll always take recommendations from you my friend!!

my concerts were both really really fun! i loved olivia's set and she's really grown as a performer since she was first starting out :") and the japanese house was so special because i got to see her with a close friend and at the zoo AND it was her biggest headlining show to date!! eep! i think my only concert tips are: bring earplugs! if you don't have them already, i recommend the loop ones but if you forget them no big deal (i forgot mine for olivia and had to ask for some) most arenas/stadiums will have earplugs!! just go to guest services or accessibility 🤍 and triple check the bag policy! sometimes you're allowed to bring a factory sealed water bottle which i love doing. and i personally like drinking a liquid iv when i get home post-concert (liquid iv + tylenol) just because i know i've screamed a lot/need to hydrate more. other tips: wear comfy shoes! bring a backup phone charger! if you're sensitive to flashing lights, try wearing sunglasses so it's not as IN your face — i did that at olivia and it helped a bit i think! but most importantly: be aware of your surroundings and HAVE SO MUCH FUN!!

i can't wait to hear about your concert!! sending love and big hugs!

[hitchell-mope]

I still like my fancast better

I’ve got nothing against Erivo, Bailey and Grande. But the fact remains is. They don’t look like college students. I mean. Look at dear Evan Hansen. I like Ben Platt. But he was too old to convincingly play a high school student on film. Same goes for Erivo, Bailey and Grande. Theatre is an entirely different medium that almost completely lacks closeups.

And yes. Before anyone says anything. I’m more than aware that Booboo Stewart, Sofia Carson and Mitchell Hope are all pushing thirty. But they can still pass for younger. And in my opinion. Erivo, Bailey and Grande can’t. I’m not saying they’re not talented, I’ve only seen Bailey in five children and It, Broadchurch and doctor who but I know he was in a Sondheim musical and I’ve heard Erivo sing in Pinocchio and Grande sing in Victorious. I’m saying that in my own opinion they don’t look like the college student Fiyeraba and Glinda are at the start. But as always. I’m prepared to change my mind in the event they manage to pull it off

On another far, far more petty note. You CAN make it into one full film. You CAN segue from Defying Gravity to Thank Goodness. Just zoom out as Elphaba belts out the final note of Defying Gravity, fade to white, or green if you’d prefer, and zoom back in on Fiyero and Glinda’s engagement party in Thank Goodness. It CAN be done. So don’t be lazy. Don’t make us wait like the Simpsons did. Don’t try to be deathly hallows or mockingjay. If les miserables can do it. So can you. So please. Don’t. Be. Lazy.

TL;DR: I still like my fancast better but I’m prepared to be wrong. And I fully believe the filmmakers are being completely and utterly fucking lazy by splitting the film up into two parts and making us all wait a year between instalments. And no. You will never be able to change my mind on this last one. It’s already made up

[juicingbeetles]

RA characters' favorite musicals

Halt: Pretends he doesn't like musicals, but he's secretly a Lord Andy stan, and likes to listen to Phantom of the Opera on a tape he got in the 80s.

Will: The definition of a theater kid, the one who can rap Guns and Ships like a master. He loves Miranda musicals, but In The Heights is his favorite.

Gilan: adores Les Mis. He's tried on numerous occasions to get a group of rangers together to do an epic rendition of One Day More, but so far only Will is interested.

Alyss: is a ride-or-die Sondheime fan. While she enjoys West Side Story (she loved the remake) Into the Woods is her favorite. She and Will like to sing it together.

Horace likes the classics, particularly Rodgers and Hammerstein, but some how nothing has overtaken Cole Porter's Anything Goes.

Cassandra has a guilty pleasure, which is Dear Evan Hansen. She knows it's beyond defending at this point, especially after the movie, but dammit she loves to belt You Will be Found or Waving Through a Window on occasion.

Crowley LOVES Beetlejuice the Musical. A lot. Halt is used to his rant about how "Even it didn't win a Tony for Best Musical, why didn't it get best set design? And Alex Brightman being passed over for best actor is a CRIME!" He went into mourning when the show got evicted.

Pauline is the only one privy to Halt's Webber stanning, and she, too, enjoys those musicals. Personally, she prefers Cats. No one knows why.

Arald loves Team Starkid. So does Sandra. So does all of Castle Redmont. His favorite is The Guy Who didn't Like Musicals, which he uses to torment Halt. He says he is in favor of a musical apocalypse.

Jenny Iikes Waitress, for obvious reasons. When she's making a pie you can hear her singing "sugar, butter, flour," over and over.

[courtneysmovieblog]

“West Side Story” remake surpasses the original

Most people were not happy with Steven Spielberg remaking West Side Story. “We don’t need a new West Side Story. We don’t want one!”

Well, maybe some of us didn’t want one or need one, but we got one. And you know what? It’s a rare remake that’s better than the original.

I know that sounds like sacrilege, but come on. As iconic as the original movie is, the fact that Natalie Wood was neither Latina nor a singer doesn’t particularly age well. The casting itself alone needed an update with actual Latine/Hispanic actors, not white people in brownface. 

Other detractors have claimed Spielberg’s version is too “woke.” Seriously, were they not paying attention that the original musical was about racism? The new movie does nothing to change that, except refuse to sugarcoat those themes. All the brilliant dance moves in the world cannot hide the fact that Riff (Mike Faist) and Jets are a bunch of angry racists that want to cling to any kind of superiority in a society that looks down on them.

The script even goes a step further by driving the point that prejudice and toxic masculinity isn’t limited to angry cisgender white boys. Bernardo (David Alvarez)  is given more depth and backstory, as is Chino (Josh Andres Rivera) to show how their desire to protect their families and communities is corrupted by anger and frustration at the unequal system. Anybodys (Iris Menas) is now a transgender male instead of a tomboy girl, seeking any kind of acceptance, even if that means hurting others.

Yet even with all that, Spielberg, unlike many directors, is willing to let a musical be a musical. The score and lyrics by Leonard Bernstein and Stephen Sondheim is as brilliant as ever, though some of the musical sequences are arranged slightly differently than any of those productions. Thanks to the colorful cinematography and dazzling choreography, most of the changes work.

Mind you, the film isn’t completely perfect. We could have used a different Tony, and not just because of the allegations against the actor. While Rachel Zegler’s Maria knocks it out of the park with her wide-eyed innocence and dazzling Disney Princess voice, Ansel Elgort’s mediocre singing and mostly plastic face just kind of falls flat.

Thankfully, everyone else in the cast more than compensates for the film’s shortcomings. Ariana DeBose’s Anita steals the show, as Rita Moreno did before her. And Moreno herself is a welcome presence; her heartbreaking rendition of “Somewhere” proves that she still has it.

West Side Story deserves all the accolades it has been given. It is one of the best movies of the year, and like In the Heights, it proves that the movie musical is far from dead.

9 out of 10

[septembersghost]

Jess. I have an unhinged question for you to go with your other lists: Top 13 1D Traxx (for Dean)

you think this is unhinged? you imagine we live in a world where I am not deranged™ enough to have already contemplated this? oh, honey. I have. as with Taylor's and Sondheim's songs, for Dean in my head they obviously detach from the "original" meaning, so you can interpret any of this however you want to interpret it, they're an array of scenarios and moments in his life to me.

1. Ready to Run (the whole song. every line of the song.

There's a lightning in your eyes, I can't deny/Then there's me inside a sinking boat/Running out of time/Without you, I'll never make it out alive/But I know, yes I know, we'll be alright/There's a devil in your smile, it's chasing me/And every time I turn around, it's only gaining speed/There's a moment when you finally realize/There's no way you can change the rolling tide/But I know, yes I know that I'll be fine/This time I'm ready to run/Escape from the city and follow the sun/'Cause I wanna be yours, don't you wanna be mine?/I don't wanna get lost in the dark of the night/This time I'm ready to run/Wherever you are is the place I belong/'Cause I wanna be free, and I wanna be young/I will never look back, now I'm ready to run/There's a future in my life I can't foresee/Unless of course, I stay on course and keep you next to me/There will always be the kind that criticize/But I know, yes I know we'll be alright)

2. Through the Dark - (You tell me that you're hurt and you're in pain/And I can see your head is held in shame/But I just wanna see you smile again/See you smile again/But don't burn out/Even if you scream and shout/It'll come back to you/And I'll be here for you/Oh, I will carry you over/Fire and water for your love/And I will hold you closer/Hope your heart is strong enough/When the night is coming down on you/We will find a way/Through the dark)

3. Walking in the Wind - (okay, so...this song takes on a slightly different context now and makes me cry, but it was also, oddly or not, my #1 comfort song in November. it goes without saying, fuck the finale. this is just about letting them drive into the sunset, and it was actually after Inherit the Earth that its meaning in that sense struck my heart anyway.

A week ago you said to me, "Do you believe I'll never be too far?/If you're lost, just look for me, you'll find me in the region of the summer stars/The fact that we can sit right here and say goodbye means we've already won/A necessity for apologies between you and me/Baby, there is none."/We had some good times, didn't we?/We had some good tricks up our sleeve/Goodbyes are bittersweet/But it's not the end, I'll see your face again/You will find me/Yeah, you will find me/In places that we've never been/For reasons we don't understand/Walking in the wind)

4. Long Way Down - (We made a fire, went down in the flames/We sailed an ocean and drowned in the wave/Built a cathedral, but we never prayed/We had it all, yeah/And we walked away/Point of no return and now it's just too late to turn around/I try to forgive you but I struggle, 'cause I don't know how/We built it up so high and now I'm falling/It's a long way down)

5. Don't Forget Where You Belong - (Lights off when they should be on/Even stars in the skies look wrong/Short days, when the nights are long/When I think of the things I've done/Don't matter how far I've gone/I'm always free to run home/Don't forget where you belong)

6. Fireproof - (I think I'm gonna lose my mind/Something deep inside me, I can't give up/I think I'm gonna lose my mind/I roll and I roll 'til I'm out of luck/I'm feeling something deep inside/Hotter than a jet stream burning up/I got a feeling deep inside/It's taking, it's taking all I've got/'Cause nobody knows you, baby, the way I do/And nobody loves you, baby, the way I do/It's been so long, it's been so long, maybe we're fireproof)

7. If I Could Fly - (If I could fly/I'd be coming right back home to you/I think I might give up everything/Just ask me to/Pay attention, I hope that you listen/'Cause I let my guard down/Right now, I'm completely defenseless/For your eyes only, I show you my heart/For when you're lonely and forget who you are/I'm missing half of me when we're apart/Now you know me, for your eyes only/I've got scars/Even though they can't always be seen/And pain gets hard/But now you're here and I don't feel a thing/(chorus repeats)/I can feel your heart inside of mine/I've been going out of my mind/Know that I'm just wasting time, and I/Hope that you don't run from me)

8. Drag Me Down - (we're stretching boundaries here because this is about Dean, but it's not from his POV in my mind. not that any of these have to be, some are more descriptive of him and my emotions around him. <3

I've got fire for a heart, I'm not scared of the dark/You've never seen it look so easy/I got a river for a soul, and baby, you're a boat/Baby, you're my only reason/If I didn't have you, there would be nothing left/The shell of a man who could never be his best/If I didn't have you, I'd never see the sun/You taught me how to be someone, yeah/All my life, you stood by me/When no one else was ever behind me/All these lights, they can't blind me/With your love, nobody can drag me down)

9. You and I - (I know how it goes, I know how it goes from wrong and right/Silence and sound/Did they ever hold each other tight like us?/Did they ever fight like us?/You and I, we don't wanna be like them/We can make it 'til the end/Nothing can come between you and I/Not even the gods above/Can separate the two of us/No, nothing can come between you and I/I figured it out/Saw the mistakes of up and down/Meet in the middle/There's always room for common ground)

10. Infinity - ("everybody wants you, everybody wants you" is obviously about Dean himself, but emotionally a lot of it...feels very Dean.

It's like I'm frozen, but the world still turns/Stuck in motion, and the wheels keep spinning 'round/Moving in reverse with no way out/And now I'm one step closer to being/Two steps far from you/When everybody wants you/Everybody wants you/How many nights does it take to count the stars?/That's the time it would take to fix my heart/Oh, baby, I was there for you/All I ever wanted was the truth/How many nights have you wished someone would stay?/Lie awake only hoping they're okay/I never counted all of mine/If I tried, I know it would feel like infinity)

11. Spaces - (Who's gonna be the first one to start the fight?/Who's gonna be the first one to fall asleep at night?/Who's gonna be the last one to drive away?/Who's gonna be the last one to forget this place?/We keep taking turns, will we ever learn?/Oh, spaces between us keep getting deeper/It's harder to reach ya, even though I've tried/Spaces between us, hold all our secrets/Leaving us speechless and I don't know why/Who's gonna be the first to say goodbye?/Who's gonna be the first one to compromise?/Who's gonna be the first one to set it all on fire?)

12. Strong - (I'd do anything to save it/Why is it so hard to say it?/My heart, your heart, sit tight like bookends/Pages between us written with no end/So many words we're not saying/Don't wanna wait 'til it's gone/You make me strong/I'm sorry if I say, "I need you"/But I don't care, I'm not scared of love)

13. A.M. - (Feels like this could be forever tonight/Break these clocks, forget about time/There could be a World War 3 going on outside/You and me were raised in the same part of town/Got these scars on the same ground/Remember how we used to kick around just wasting time?/Won't you stay 'til the A.M.?/All my favorite conversations/Always made in the A.M./'Cause we don't know what we're saying/We're just swimming 'round in our glasses/And talking out of our asses/Like we're all gonna make it)

unofficial playlist members: shout out to Rock Me, which doesn't fit his story at all, I just like to imagine him enjoying it for the chorus and the double entendre. I want you to hit the pedal, heavy metal, show me you care, I want you to rock me...

Night Changes and Story of My Life also both have lovely driving lyrics, and driving lyrics always make me think of him, even if the song itself doesn't fit, and the latter also has one of my favorite lyrics of theirs generally.

Driving too fast, moon is breaking through her hair/She's heading for something that she won't forget/Having no regrets is all that she really wants/We're only getting older, baby/And I've been thinking about it lately/Does it ever drive you crazy/Just how fast the night changes?

And I'll be gone, gone tonight/The ground beneath my feet is open wide/The way that I've been holding on too tight/With nothing in between/The story of my life/I take her home/I drive all night/To keep her warm/And time is frozen...Written on these walls are the colors that I can't change/Leave my heart open/But it stays right here in its cage/I know that in the morning, now/I'll see us in the light upon the hill/Although I am broken, my heart is untamed still.

[unimportant-ramblings]

1-20

Anon said go crazy we stan

1. Book you've reread the most times?

I should be cool and arty here but the answer is Twilight <3

2. Top five books of all time?

Good question man fuck okay as of this moment, knowing this definitely has some recency bias as well as some cringe

a) Pride and Prejudice

b) Finishing The Hat by Stephen Sondheim

c) Little Women

d) The Sleeping Dictionary by Sujata Massey (what if memoirs from a geisha was good?)

e) fucking ...... Midnight Sun tbqh like yeah maybe I'm cringe but!

3. Favorite genre?

I'll read anything but I read a lot of sci fi, historical romance, and performing arts history

4. What sections of the bookstore do you browse?

Sale 😎😎😎

5. Where do you buy books?

Tbh I don't buy many books? I use the library for almost everything I read, both physically and digitally. I like being able to read as much as I want without having to budget, or picking up a book and having the freedom of just taking it back without the feeling of "but you paid $25 dollars for this :///"

When I do buy books, I shop at the local children's book store for my niblings, I use Libro.fm for any audiobooks I want to own that they have (use libro whenever you can! Support local book stores and you own the book outright!) and I use the Canadian chain Indigo because that's where people get me gift cards from

6. What books have you read in the last month.

These are my books for May thus far

A Load of Hooey by Bob Odenkirk (audiobook, short humor stories!)

The Break by Katherena Vermette (audiobook; intergenerational trauma of indigenous Canadian women ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐)

Go Hex Yourself by Jessica Clare (paperback, second major publication of Reylo fanfiction ⭐⭐⭐⭐)

Just like Heaven by Julia Quinn (audiobook Bridgerton sidequest ⭐⭐⭐)

There's No Such Thing as an Easy Job by Kikuko Tsumura ( audiobook women experienced burnout, goes job hunting ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐)

Pride and Prejudice and other Spices by Sonali Dev (audiobook finally a good modern p&p ⭐⭐⭐⭐)

Squad by Maggie Tokuda-Hall (graphic novel about female werewolves!)

Midnight Sun by Stephenie Meyer (reread, audio, regrettably ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐)

7. Is there a series/book that got you into reading?

Probably a series of unfortunate events

8. What is the first book you remember reading to yourself?

I really have no clear idea, must have been a comic of some kind!

9. When do you tend to read most?

Because I do most of my reading through audiobooks, almost perpetually. I read a lot when I'm on walks!

10. Do you have a guilty fav?

Like I joke that Twilight is a guilty pleasure and it definitely was at one point, but when something brings you as much joy as Twilight and the surrounding fandom gives to me, it can no longer be classified as a guilty pleasure. I think the crown of thorns and roses books are at a similar level for me now, like not only will i read the next book Sarah j Maas writes in the series but I find myself kind of craving the next one like a sugar fix, even if it doesn't give me any sustenance. I spend a large amount of time frustrated with the book and then I'll cry over the ending. I guess I'm not that guilty about any of the books I read anymore Life's too short for finding guilt and things that genuinely make you happy?

11. Nonfiction books do you like if any?

Fucking love me some nonfiction books! One of the best nonfiction books I read last year was called A Mad Love: An Introduction to Opera by Vivien Schweitzer, cannot recommend it enough if you'd like to get into opera. Stephen sondheim's incredible books on lyrics Finishing The Hat and Look I Made A Hat are both perfect. Last year I read Between Two Kingdoms: A Memoir of a Life Interrupted by Suleika Jaouad, highly recommend, it's about cancer and being terminally/chronically ill, beautifully written. Oh and Catch And Kill by Ronan Farrow, and the audiobook is narrated by him as well. Nonfiction is good!

12. You enjoy any compulsory high school reading?

Well! I really enjoyed all the plays we had to read, and for the most part I don't think they were bad, but I also did not read them when I was supposed to. So it's a mixed bag

13. Do you have a goodreads?

You think I could read all these books and remember them without a goodreads?

14. Do you ever mark/slash dog ear books you own?

Sometimes! But I'm much more likely to take a picture of something I read.

15. Recommend and review a book.

In addition to the non fiction books above and the children's lit in my other post, the best thriller I read recently was The Plot by Jean Hanff Korelitz. I like thrillers in theory but I often don't end up actually liking them much as I want to. Either they are way too intense for my tastes, verging on horror (and I cannot deal with reading the death of a child so that greatly limits the titles I read) or they are tame, like all this mystery and I guessed the end immediately, and it's boring! With The Plot it was the perfect balance. I did guessed the ending early on, but watching it play out was, frankly, thrilling. It was almost a Greek tragedy, the way the end was inevitable. I also really enjoyed the focus on the publishing industry and the nature of story. Really good and a fairly quick read!

16. How many books have you read this year?

I've read 50 books as of this moment!

17. Top five children's books?

Answered!

18. Like historical books? Which time period?

Yes I like historical books!! I prefer my romances to be sent in Regency and I usually don't enjoy books centered around either world war but I'm not overly picky!

19. Most disliked popular book?

I no longer know if these are popular with the youths but they were popular when I read every single one of the Red Queen young adult books and hated every single minute of it I don't understand why they were so popular, they were billed as these young adult game of thrones and they were as shallow as a puddle

20. What are things you look for in books?

Answered!

Thanks for the ask!!!!!

[flowerfan2]

Private Time - Chapter Two

Klaine, M, 4k, A03. Summary:  One thing about being in quarantine with your grad school roommates... you hardly get any private time...

Wow, the reaction to this fic has blown me away.  Thank you so much to everyone who reblogged and commented.  It’s wonderful to feel the Klaine love.

And since you asked so nicely, here is chapter two!

Chapter 2

Kurt Hummel prides himself on being able to survive just about anything, from small town bigots to drama school divas.  But this quarantine thing is really getting to him.

It’s not that he has any problems with his roommates, far from it.  He’s known Rachel since high school, and his fondness for her more than balances his aggravation.  Sweet and goofy Sam became part of their trio of friends last year when Kurt had thought about starting a band, and Sam had shown up at the audition.  While the band didn’t take off, Kurt will never forget Sam’s rendition of “Nothing On But The Radio.”  Priceless.

But then there’s Blaine. Even thinking about the guy makes Kurt go weak in the knees.  It’s not like Kurt to be so affected by a pretty face, even one peeking out from under wet curls as he scoots down the hall after his evening shower with just a towel wrapped low around his hips.  Kurt prides himself on his restraint when it comes to opening up to the possibility of romance, but with Blaine, it has been a challenge.

It started with that damn a capella benefit Rachel dragged him to.  As if he needed to spend an evening watching preppy kids grinning at each other while they sang poorly re-arranged pop tunes.  “It’s for a good cause, Kurt,” Rachel had argued.  “And it’s not just the college groups. Everyone at the university can participate.  I would be performing, too, if I wasn’t saving my voice.”

 And so an hour into a dreadfully dull evening of twenty-somethings trying to relive their high school musical glory days, Kurt had his first experience of nearly losing his mind over Blaine Anderson.  Amidst a sea of mediocrity, Blaine came on stage and performed Sondheim’s <i>Not While I’m Around</i> without accompaniment.  Kurt felt like he was coming apart.  He was so wrecked that he left the theater immediately after Blaine’s performance and spent the rest of the evening stalking around campus, furious with himself for losing his cool.

 That night while his roommates were still out, Kurt indulged himself in a way he hadn’t done in ages. First a lavender scented bubble bath, then a long solo session in between fresh, clean sheets.  It was okay to fantasize about Blaine Anderson, he was just a guy on a stage, Kurt didn’t know him from Adam (and he was way, way hotter than Adam with or without his Apples).  Kurt found himself humming “nothing’s gonna harm you, no sir” halfway through and didn’t even censor himself, reveling in the thought that his fantasy Blaine would protect him from all the demons of the world.

 After that, Kurt felt like he saw the guy everywhere – ducking out of the campus coffee shop, running in the early morning chill, giving Sam a warm hug before they parted ways after class.  Kurt had sort of known that Sam was bringing Blaine to see his performance of Macbeth, but had managed to block it out until afterwards, when Sam trotted backstage with Blaine on his heels.  Blaine’s shy smile and soft blush when he offered Kurt his congratulations had rendered him nearly speechless.

 And then the unthinkable happened.  They had held off on finding a fourth person to share the rent for several months, mostly because Rachel thought that sharing their single decent shower with two guys was as much as she could stand, but money was tight for all of them and it seemed silly to let the room stay empty.  Before they had even had a chance to advertise the vacancy Sam came home one afternoon with Blaine, announced that he had found them a perfect flatmate, and started giving Blaine the tour.  Kurt had nearly choked on his skinny margarita.

 There wasn’t much time to dwell on his crush before the quarantine, but now, Blaine is everywhere. Kurt tries to count how many different black polo shirts the man has, just to prove himself he could look but still retain a modicum of brain power, but he fails miserably.  Instead his eyes keep sliding down to where Blaine shirt’s is tucked around his slender waist, just before his red pants curve over the best ass Kurt has ever seen.  

 When Rachel announces her <i>private time</i> plan Kurt immediately knows what she is up to. If Sam and Blaine knew her better, they would have caught on faster as well – since when did Rachel Berry mind if anyone heard her sing?  It’s a lame cover-up, but before Kurt can open his mouth and say so, he realizes how useful Rachel’s plan could be.  So he stands up, smooths his hands down over his pants, and high-tails it upstairs to the privacy of his room before his pants get even tighter.

 That first night, Kurt doesn’t have any intention of participating.  He’s feeling rather superior, if he is honest with himself. Suddenly randy Rachel and lack of self-control Sam may be taking care of business, but Kurt Hummel doesn’t need any of that.  He puts on his headphones, pulls out an old voice lesson journal, and goes through some exercises himself.  Rachel may have been joking about the need for private rehearsal time, but Kurt is nothing if not career focused, and he hasn’t had much of an opportunity for honing his craft lately either.

 After he finishes the exercises in his journal, Kurt gets out his phone and some earbuds – he’s got some vocal tracks on his phone which split the parts, the lead coming through on one side and the harmony parts on the other. Just as he’s finding the track he wants to start on and fiddling with the left earbud, which for some unknowable reason keeps falling out of his ear, he hears a long, low moan.

 Kurt freezes, earbud dangling from his hand.  It’s Blaine, that much is obvious from the direction of the sound, and from the fact that it seems to be coming from right next to him, where only a wall divides his room from Blaine’s.  Somehow that one drawn-out expression of need has shot right through him, sparking through his entire body.  Kurt feels light-headed and almost forgets to breathe.

 Overwhelmed, Kurt panics. He scrambles to grab the noise-cancelling headphones and clamp them over his ears, and dives under his duvet.  It’s too much, and it’s inappropriate to think about, but at the same time it’s impossible not to imagine.  It’s Blaine, with his hand on his private parts, making that incredibly sexy noise just a few feet away from Kurt.  Kurt is never going to make it through this quarantine.

 By the next morning Kurt has regained his equilibrium.  He spends most of the day firmly (but not <i>firmly,</i> Kurt thinks, bad word choice, sternly, yes, very sternly, god that’s hardly better, hardly, stop it, I’m dying, I’m being slain by my own internal monologue) telling himself that he is not going to participate any further in Rachel’s ridiculous plan.  Tomorrow, their next scheduled private time night, Kurt will simply go for a walk. Walking is good for him, he could use the exercise and fresh air, and he doesn’t do it nearly as much as he should. He’ll even wear the new mask he made from a Prada dust bag (there’s no need to abandon style, just because there’s a pandemic).

 But on Thursday night when he tells Rachel he’s going out she cackles at him like she’s auditioning for the Wicked Witch of the West, and points with a shaking finger to the window. It’s raining, a veritable deluge. Kurt growls at her and goes upstairs.

 Fine.  It’s all fine.  He can do this.  It’s nothing to feel shameful about, even if everyone in the house knows he’s doing it. They’re all doing it too.  

 Kurt lights a candle (sandalwood), finds some of the expensive body lotion he saves for special occasions, and makes himself comfortable.  Soon his thoughts are wandering to how a certain someone looked this morning, sitting out on the back porch with Sam.  They had both been fooling around on their guitars, and Sam was teasing Blaine about how his hair kept falling into his eyes.  Sam had even reached out and pushed an errant, gel-free curl away from Blaine’s face…

 That should have been Kurt. He would have waited until Blaine finished playing a gentle love song (“the things you do endear me to you, ah you know I will… I will”) and looked up expectantly at him, a hesitant smile on his face.  Kurt would have leaned close to Blaine, seeing his long lashes flutter as he softly pressed his palm to Blaine’s smooth cheek.  Kurt would have threaded his fingers through Blaine’s dark hair, and they would have laughed together, barely audible to anyone else, and then Kurt would have pulled Blaine in for a breathtaking, awe-inspiring first kiss.

 Kurt climaxes with an unexpected grunt, and then presses his face into his pillow.  That was embarrassingly fast, even for a fantasy.  He’s going to have to do better.  At least he needs to get to the part where he can grab Blaine’s ass in his hands and give it a good squeeze.  Who knows what kind of noises Blaine might make when his ass is fondled just right.  Kurt might even have to think about sliding those tight red pants down over Blaine’s luscious curves, moving his hands up and down and around, letting his fingers explore and press in…

 Kurt realizes he’s getting hard again, and much to his dismay, he soon goes for round two like a horny teenager.  

 It rains all day on Friday, and Saturday morning is equally gloomy, ruining their plans to make lunch and take it to campus for an appropriately socially distant picnic. Sam comes up with an alternate plan that involves bartering for a packet of yeast (the sister of one of his rugby mates thought ahead and purchased large quantities from a restaurant supply store) and making homemade bread, and Blaine sunnily agrees to bike to the other side of town to pick it up.  Kurt volunteers some of his masks to use as a trade, and by noon, they are all assembled in the kitchen, ready to start their day’s project.

 Kurt has made bread a million times (okay, maybe just two or three), so they all look to him for guidance. It turns out to be way more fun than Kurt had expected, even more so when he keeps catching Blaine looking at him shyly from under those ridiculously long lashes.  When they all start giggling at the mess they’ve made and Blaine reaches out and tries to wipe flour off of Kurt’s nose, Kurt thinks he’s never been happier.

 That night they eat their bread with the remains of various cheeses and drink more wine than Kurt had thought they had left in the house.  He’s feeling loose and safe in his skin when Blaine flops down on the couch next to him, holding out a bowl of strawberries.  “These go great with the bread,” Blaine says, which is what they’ve been saying about everything they have eaten that night.

 Kurt doesn’t argue and pops a strawberry in his mouth.  “Yeah, they do.”

 Blaine focuses his big brown eyes on Kurt, and then leans in and draws his finger just along the edge of Kurt’s mouth, making him shiver.

 “Powdered sugar,” Blaine explains, and then shuffles even closer to Kurt on the couch.  It’s like he’d done earlier today, but this time his voice comes out in a caramel draped baritone.  “You’ve got a little here, too.”  Blaine touches a fingertip to Kurt’s cheek, and then then blushes furiously and lets his hand drop.

 Kurt can’t resist, Blaine is simply too enticing.  Blaine’s done all the hard work anyway, his blush speaking as eloquently as any Shakespeare sonnet.  “I think you’ve still got flour in your hair,” Kurt says, reaching out and twining a curl around his finger.  It’s just as soft as he imagined, and Blaine lets out a little sigh in response and leans his head into the touch.  

 Kurt takes a deep breath, his whole body trembling.  Blaine’s eyes rise to meet his, and Kurt cups Blaine’s cheek and pulls Blaine in for a kiss.

 It’s better than his fantasy, of course it is.  Blaine tastes of strawberries and wine, his stubble scrapes ever so gently against Kurt’s skin, and he’s warm and alive under Kurt’s hand.  They move closer on the couch, knees and thighs and shoulders pressing against each other.  Blaine’s tongue darts out to trace Kurt’s lips, and then Kurt opens his mouth and the kiss deepens, harder and gentler in turns, until Kurt forgets that anything else exists in the world except for this.

 When they finally part, breathless and wide eyed, Rachel and Sam have disappeared.  Kurt glances at the clock on the wall and sees that it’s after eleven.  Blaine’s glance follows his, and then he beams at Kurt, a mischievous look dancing in his eyes.

 “It’s private time,” Blaine says, and Kurt blinks at him, momentarily confused.  The earnest expression on Blaine’s face sure doesn’t look like he’s interesting in putting an end to their not-so-solo activities, and either does the hand he’s holding out to Kurt.

 “Care to accompany me?”

[fairiesandfishes]

Little Red: Into The Woods

Or perhaps, more aptly: Little Red: Into The Wolf

 Into The Woods is one of Stephen Sondheim’s most well-known and well-produced musicals. In this tale, the characters and plots of numerous different Brothers Grimm and Charles Perrault fairy tales are spun together to create a riveting and moving story. Many of the main characters in Into The Woods are taken from Rapunzel, Little Red Riding Hood, Cinderella, and Jack and the Beanstalk. Originally, Into The Woods premiered on Broadway in 1987. If you never get the chance to see it in person (which I would highly recommend), there is a filmed version of the original Broadway cast (minus one original Snow White) available online.  

Into the Woods has Little Red Riding Hood and her famous Wolf as key players within the overarching story. For this blog, I’ll be focusing solely on Little Red’s arc in the show as is relatable to the Brothers Grimm version of the tale.

 To detail her story from Into The Woods: Little Red Riding Hood is a young, naïve, snarky, and selfish little girl. She is sent by her mother to town to buy bread and sweets from the baker, and then to bring those goods to her grandmother in the woods. Little Red pays the baker, but makes off with more than she paid for. It’s very funny in the show, but it sets an interesting tone for her character.

Little Red then heads into the forest and meets the Wolf. Little Red, in all her youthful naiveté, tells the Wolf her plans to meet her grandmother, which marks the beginning of her fall from innocence. In this version of the tale, the Wolf is a muscular, bipedal canine, wearing nothing but a long blue coat and the large amount of fur on his body. In the original 1987 Broadway production, the Wolf’s costume also features a wolfish penis and a large set of testicles swinging between his legs – a particularly unsubtle nod to the inherent sexuality the character of the Wolf has in some versions of the story, and something that most certainly did not make it into the Disney film adaptation. 

When The Wolf hears about Little Red’s plans for the day, he sings a song about how perfect, fair, plump, and delicious she looks. He also devises a plan wherein he can eat both Little Red and her grandmother, and convinces Little Red to take the long route to her grandmother’s house, where she picks flowers and eats most of the food meant for her grandmother. Due to the Wolf’s conniving instincts, Little Red takes the long path to her grandmother’s house, but the short path to her loss of innocence. https://youtu.be/kqCsQCsinK4?t=1091 (Into The Woods - Hello, Little Girl)

Now, due to the interconnectedness of the fairy tales within Into The Woods, this is where the plot heavily diverges from the Brothers Grimm version of the tale. On her way, the baker from before spies Little Red and her “cape as red as blood”. Because of an unfortunate curse from a witch (Rapunzel’s adoptive mother, actually) that causes the baker and his wife to be unable to have children, the baker desperately needs this cape so he can lift the curse. He steals it from her, but Little Red cries so much that our sympathetic baker gives it back.

After promptly smacking the baker in between his legs, Little Red arrives at her grandmother’s cottage only to find the door open. She tentatively heads into the building to find a very strange-looking version of her grandmother. Our caped crusader comments on the unnaturally large size of her “grandmother’s” ears, eyes, hands, and “terrible, big, wet” mouth, the final comment prompting the Wolf to throw off his disguise and devour Little Red whole. Satisfied with his meal, the Wolf falls asleep. 

After being painfully reminded by Little Red about his curse, the baker from earlier resolves to steal the cape from Little Red again, but this time for good. He rushes to the cottage, only to hear very loud snoring. He smartly guesses it is the Wolf so he grabs his knife and cuts open the Wolf’s stomach, freeing Little Red and her grandmother. Red’s grandmother, despite her age, feistily describes the way in which she is going to murder the Wolf, which is exactly the same as the method of murder from the Brothers Grimm story.

Little Red sings and reflects on her follies that lead her to the dark pit of the Wolf’s stomach. This song echoes much of the same message that Charles Perrault’s story had, including the details about how nice and gentlemanly the Wolf seemed. Unlike Perrault’s version, Little Red actually lives to grow from this lesson. Little Red also echoes much that would be in favor of a psychoanalytic approach to the story. She sings about how the Wolf showed her things she had never seen before, which was exhilarating, but also incredibly frightening. This adds onto Little Red’s overall theme in the show, which is a loss of innocence. Much of the song points to the Wolf being Little Red’s first sexual experience, which is further corroborated by the earlier sexual imagery of the Wolf’s appearance. Watch the song – it’s excellent, and includes one of my favorite lines from the show, which is that “Nice is different than good.” https://youtu.be/kqCsQCsinK4?t=1910 (Into The Woods - I Know Things Now)

Now, how does the Brothers Grimm version of Little Red Riding Hood match up to the one concocted by Stephen Sondheim? In all honesty, surprisingly well. We have the mother’s warning, the Wolf’s seduction, the fatherly male savior, and one alive, yet probably traumatized, Little Red. The main differences are how overtly the sexuality is displayed and how the moral is Perrault’s. In the Brothers Grimm version, the sexuality is much more subtle than even Perrault’s tale. In this version, the sexuality is out in full swing, particularly between the Wolf’s legs. What I find most interesting is that, despite having the arc of her story and many of the details be exactly the same the Brothers Grimm version, it is Perrault’s moral of distrusting those who display themselves as kindly gentlemen that survive. The Grimm’s moral of obeying one’s parents is hardly there, although present, and instead we hear Little Red sing that the Wolf “seemed so nice”, so she believed and listened to him.

The version of Little Red’s story we see here has interesting things to say if peered at through a psychoanalytic lens. Later into the show, we meet Little Red again, but this time she is wearing a wolfskin coat and brandishes a knife. Now, I don’t know if you know this, but in Freudian psychology, a knife often symbolizes a phallus, and sometimes in a sexually aggressive light. Now, I apologize for this sentence, dear reader, but a Freudian analysis demands it: in Into The Woods, Little Red grows her own penis. In other, less awful words, Little Red gains power and the ability to choose her own sexual experiences, as opposed to being naively lead into them. She also carries along with her the literal skin of someone who tricked her, displaying how she triumphed over a trickster and has learned from the experience.

One other interesting facet of this story, and particularly Little Red’s song, is that she was thrilled by the experience she had with the Wolf. She even goes as far to say that it is nice to know so many new things, although she does quickly backtrack to say that it’s a little unfortunate to have all the knowledge, too. This somewhat favors a common psychoanalytic take on the story, which is that Little Red wanted to be seduced by the wolf. Personally, I’m unsure if that analysis is applicable to the Into The Woods version of her story, though it does fit in well with the theme of a loss of innocence. I prefer to say that Little Red didn’t really lose her innocence; instead, she gained knowledge and capability. And anyway, I’ve always had somewhat of an issue with a psychoanalytic approach to the story. If you aren’t careful, if sounds like you’re excusing sexual assault, and it goes without saying that that’s a pretty awful thing to do. Freud, whose ideas I have been using as an analytical tool, has a history of saying that those who experienced sexual assault (from adults, generally parents) as children imagined it as an oedipal fantasy, entirely disregarding the trauma that his patients had been through.

In all honesty - I don’t know what the intended message of this iteration of Little Red’s story is. It combines both Perrault’s rape allegory and the Grimm Brother’s moral of listening to authority and learning from your mistakes into a bit of a confusing message. In the end, I do find it comforting: Little Red knows how to protect herself, and she is assured in who she is. 

That’s the show and the comparison, and a touch of psychoanalytic psychosis for you. Thanks for reading! Additionally, if you’d like to see the REST of Into The Woods, you can find it here in all it’s 1987 glory. Personally, I don’t know what to think about this version, but it is pretty famous. Nothing like a good live production of it, in my opinion. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqCsQCsinK4 (Into The Woods - full 1987 Broadway version)

[an-aura-about-you]

It’s @zerozeroren‘s birthday! I can’t send her anything due to pandemic, so I’m writing her a nice fluffy father-son moment with Logos and Autor that just so happens to relate to the fic I just posted.

Catching Autor looking pensive is nothing new. Usually all anyone has to do to see it is check the office or the library. Today, however, he’s sitting at the upright, staring at the Gem in his hand. While he sits there and contemplates doing what he wishes, Logos happens to catch him.

“Ah, did Erina give you a gift?” he asks Autor.

Autor lets the Glory slip from his fingers, suspended on a delicate chain around his neck. The replica is quite small, only just big enough to hold the inscription, and attached to the chain at the two points where the serpents’ mouths meet each others’ tails. “You could say that,” he answers.

“May I see it?” Logos asks.

Autor undoes the chain and offers the jewelry to his father. “It’s a replica of AURYN.”

Logos takes the piece and whistles low in admiration as he inspects it. “Look at that detail. It even says, ‘Do What You Wish,’ on the back. Did you tell her you like that story or did she just guess?”

“She guessed I like the story.”

Logos gives the piece back, frowning a little at the way Autor shifts in place and the flatness of his response. “Everything all right between you two?”

Autor puts the replica back on and goes, “That... the relationship is okay.”

That’s an odd way to put it, but Logos can tell he’s stepping too far. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to press.”

“I know you didn’t,” Autor answers, hand going to the replica again. This time when he speaks, his brows furrow like he’s come to some decision. “I... It’s complicated, being in love.”

Isn’t that always the way of the teenager, something so simple on the surface being so complicated?  Logos grins and says, “So? You’re in love with Erina. What’s so complicated about being in love with your girlfriend?”

But Autor shakes his head and the truth comes out. “You don’t understand. She’s not my girlfriend.”

Logos goes back to frowning and leans a little closer, waiting for elaboration. He doesn’t remember Autor and Erina breaking up, so what’s going on?

He takes a shaky breath and scrubs at his eyes under his glasses. “She asked... she asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend. That’s all this is. And apparently- ” He holds up the Gem again. “ -I’m doing a good job of it since she’s given me my ‘payment.’”

“Oh Autor,” Logos says, aware that most of the other words he has have long since become useless.

“What do I do, Vati?” Autor quietly asks, unable to wipe away his tears fast enough to hide them anymore.

He’s so small in asking, like a little boy again, and Logos wants all the answers to give him but knows he can never have them all. So the father puts an arm around his son’s shoulders. “Oh Autor, we’ll figure that out. You don’t have to figure it out alone.”

Autor leans against his father’s shoulder like he did when he was a kid, a little surprised at how safe he feels. He can’t go through the reasons why, not when he’s so focused on hurting. But the longer he stays here, the smaller the hurt becomes. And while the pain doesn’t go away completely, knowing he doesn’t have to face, “What do I do?” by himself leaves a warm relief in his heart.

Eventually Logos says, “Here, I was just about to get dinner started. Why don’t you come with me to the kitchen so we can figure this out?”

He feels Autor nod against him. He lets go and takes a step back, his frown only growing deeper as he looks at the miserable young man before him. He sighs through his nose, wishing he could just take all of his child’s pain away. But that’s not how life works.

“Do you mind telling me how it all started?” Logos asks as he turns towards the kitchen, indicating that Autor follow. “Like how you met Erina in the first place?”

Autor takes his glasses off a moment and wipes his eyes. “She...” He sniffles again. “She and Fakir needed a pianist for their dance practice.” He follows his father into the kitchen as Logos gets the kettle and sets it on the stove. “She got sick of everyone trying to pair her up with Fakir, so she asked me to pretend to be her boyfriend.”

“Poor girl,” Logos says as he heads to the cabinets next, working on his mise en place. “It must have been bad if she thought she had to be in a relationship to get some peace. Could you get the vegetables, Autor?”

Autor dutifully fetches an onion and some peppers. “Are we having potatoes, too?”

“Yes, thank you,” he says, setting out a cutting board. “Would you like to help or would you rather sit?”

“I can help,” Autor answers, taking some potatoes as well and bringing them over.

The two get to work, Logos chopping vegetables and Autor peeling potatoes.

“So,” Logos continues. “I do know what it’s like, pretending to be in a relationship only for there to be actual chemistry. Sometimes I’m a little too good at my job and get the occasional love confession, even now.”

“Really? You tell them about Mutti, right?”

“Of course. And they understand nothing will come of it. But I won’t lie, before your mother and I got together, some stage relationships ended up becoming offstage relationships.” He cleans the seeds out of the peppers. “Erina’s probably familiar with that herself, probably had more fake relationships than real ones when it comes to romance.”

Autor thinks back to the conversation he and Erina had when the arrangement began and her insistence on a fake relationship. When his father puts it like that, it makes sense to ask for what she knows. Would she still do that now?

“Now, how have you and Erina been enjoying your time together? Does this seem like a chore to her, or are both of you enjoying yourselves?”

Autor goes quiet, focusing more on the potatoes. Is she? She seems to be, but she might just be good at acting. Or he might just be imagining what he wants. For that matter, they didn’t say him receiving payment would be the end of the relationship, just the point when it was earned. And come to think of it, she wouldn’t have to pretend if they were alone.

Logos hums and says, “Well, if you’re not sure, maybe you should find out. Maybe Erina’s enjoying your company just as much as you’re enjoying hers. It’s worth asking to see if there’s a chance your feelings are requited.”

“And then?” he asks. “If they aren’t?”

“That’s up to you, if you’d like to tell her. The truth probably will come out sooner or later. But while it’s possible she doesn’t feel the same way, why despair about it before you know?”

Autor sets down the potato in his hand and the peeler. “When you put it like that, it does seem silly to get all worked up about it without even knowing.”

“It’s okay,” Logos says, moving the chopped vegetables to the pan. “With this situation, it’s only natural to be in a little turmoil.” He pauses after he says that and smiles, the first smile he’s put on after this topic came up. “Or maybe there’s another word for it.”

Autor glances over at his father just as he was about to resume his task, the familiarity seeping in but not quite clear yet. “Oh?”

“Do you want to pine over Cinderella or Rapunzel?”

Meaning strikes, but Autor doesn’t answer.

“Come on, I know you prefer Lloyd Webber-” Logos begins.

“Used to prefer Lloyd Webber!” Autor interrupts.

“-but Sondheim!”

“But really? Right now?”

“It’s so ridiculous that it’s sure to help. Or get some of the feelings out. If it doesn’t, we can sing something else. But even like this, Agony is pretty fun.”

Autor picks up another potato, the last one he has to peel at this point, and gets the peeler once more. “....all right, but I’ll be Cinderella’s Prince. I don’t think I’m as good as Rapunzel’s Prince.”

“Then you start.”

“Okay, just let me get this weird curve,” Autor says, trying to work the peeler around the oddly shaped potato. And then, after clearing his throat and a bit of humming to find his pitch, he begins:

“Did I abuse her or show her disdain? Why does she run from me? If I should lose her, how shall I regain the heart she has won from me? Agony!”

It’s here that Autor reaches out, gesturing with the potato peeler.

“Beyond power of speech when the one thing you want is the only thing out of your reach.”

Logos manages not to laugh before it’s his turn:

“High in her tower, she sits by the hour maintaining her hair. Blithe and becoming, and frequently humming a lighthearted air.”

As Logos wordlessly sings the tune, his overly-operatic voice leaves Autor in silent stitches. Father fetches a pot for the potatoes and Son reaches up from being doubled over to take it.

“Agony! Far more painful than yours!”

Autor laughs out loud at this point.

Undeterred, Logos continues:

“When you know she would go with you if there only were doors.”

The two manage to make it to the next bit, singing together:

“Agony! Oh the torture they teach!”

“What’s as intriguing- “ Logos asks.

“Or half as fatiguing- “ Autor adds.

“As what’s out of reach?” they join again.

It’s Autor’s turn again, and on each word he continues part of his task, potatoes going in the pot one by one, the water going in to cover them, and finally finding their home on top of the stove:

“Am I not sensitive, clever, well-mannered, considerate, passionate, charming, as kind as I’m handsome, and heir to a throne?!”

Logos throws an arm out to Autor and sings, “You are everything maidens could wish for!”

“Then why no?” Autor asks.

“Do I know?” Logos sings with a shrug.

“The girl must be mad!” he sings back.

Logos holds his arms out in front of him and looks up with, “You know nothing of madness ‘til you’re climbing her hair, and you see her up there, as you’re nearing her all the while hearing her!”

He vocalizes again, just as operatic as before, and Autor holds up a hand while he tries to catch his breath from singing and laughing.

“Agony!” they both sing.

“Misery!” Autor chokes out, tears of a different kind in his eyes.

“Woe!” Logos adds, who goes it alone on, “Though it’s different for each,” due to Autor composing himself for his next line.

“Always ten steps behind- “ Autor somehow gets out.

“Always ten feet below- “ Logos sings, once again taking a line on his own, “And she’s just out of reach.” He pats his son on the back as they get to the last bit together.

“Agony that can cut like a knife! I must have her to wife!”

“What are you two doing?” A new voice asks.

Both men turn to find Lore has joined them in the kitchen, a bag of groceries in her arms.

“Ah, let me get that for you, Mutti,” Autor says instead of answering, going to take the groceries.

“We were just starting dinner,” Logos says, joining them to give Lore a kiss on the cheek. He looks to Autor a moment, trying to figure out if his son will give him permission to tell Lore about what they’ve discussed. But with the answer unclear for now, he’ll just have to wait.

Oh well. At least he got Autor to laugh.

[thisguyatthemovies]

D-i-v-o-r-c-e

Title: “Marriage Story”

Release date: Netflix, Nov. 6, 2019

Starring: Scarlett Johansson, Adam Driver, Laura Dern, Alan Alda, Ray Liotta, Julie Hagerty, Merritt Wever, Azhy Robertson, Wallace Shawn, Martha Kelly, Mark O’Brien, Brooke Bloom

Directed by: Noah Baumbach

Run time: 2 hours, 16 minutes

Rated: R

What it’s about: An avant-garde theater director and his actress wife divorce and battle over custody of their young son.

How I saw it: Meet the Barbers. Charlie (Adam Driver) is a self-made, self-absorbed, critically acclaimed avant-garde theater director who fit right in when he moved from Indiana to New York. Nicole (Scarlett Johansson) is an actress from a Hollywood family who put her promising career on hold to follow her husband to the East Coast and star in his plays. He likes that she talks to strangers for too long, handles family issues with ease, is fully engaged when playing with their young son, frequently brews cups of tea she never intends to drink and doesn’t know how to close a cabinet door. She likes that he doesn’t let criticism bother him, is competitive, is energy conscious, attacks food as if someone is trying to take it and is a good father to their son. They complement each other well and tolerate each’s idiosyncrasies. They love each other.

And they are getting a divorce.

Director-writer Noah Baumbach’s painful, touching, smart, insightful character- and dialogue-driven drama “Marriage Story” could have been called “Divorce Story,” because that’s what it’s about. It follows Charlie and Nicole Barber through a divorce and custody battle process that is uglier and more contentious than they could have imagined. It takes a toll on them emotionally, physically and financially. They are aware there will be no real winner, that the best they can hope for is some sense of closure and the opportunity to move on while their lives still are linked by their son.

Charlie and Nicole will take wildly different approaches to the legal proceedings. Nowhere is that more apparent than when they hire (or try to hire) lawyers in vividly contrasting scenes that Baumbach uses beautifully to set up a refreshingly even-handed look at divorce. Baumbach doesn’t ask the viewer to pick sides; neither Charlie nor Nicole is all victim or all villain.

Nicole, who angrily ends an attempt at mediation, takes the divorce more seriously. When she returns to Los Angeles and takes their son Henry (Azhy Robertson) with her, she hires high-priced attorney Nora Fanshaw (Laura Dern). When the two meet at Fanshaw’s office, they sit close together on a plush sofa and sip tea and eat gourmet cookies. When Nicole tells the story of how she and Charlie met (a story that grows sadder as it devolves into one about the Barbers’ marital issues), Fanshaw sits quietly and listens, only occasionally reassuring Nicole. Contrast that with when Charlie, who was assuming the couple could work out their issues without lawyers, attempts to hire Jay Marotta (Ray Liotta). Marotta and his partner do almost all the talking, and most of it is about money and the need to crush Nicole and her lawyer. Marotta speaks from behind a huge desk with his credentials hanging on the wall behind it. When Marotta tells Charlie how much his services cost, Charlie balks, returns to New York and pretends nothing is going to happen.

When his hand is forced, Charlie hires an older, more friendly and less expensive attorney, Bert Spitz (Alan Alda). But Spitz is no match for Fanshaw, and he seems too willing to concede. When the Barbers’ case goes to court, Charlie shows up with Marotta, and the gloves are off. He and Fanshaw go toe to toe, and all the Barbers’ weaknesses are exposed as they sadly listen to the arguments. Charlie had an affair; Nicole found out about it by hacking Charlie’s email. Nicole occasionally drinks too much around their son; Charlie isn’t willing to give Nicole any credit for his career success nor share a prestigious grant he has received. Even something as innocuous as a child booster seat that wasn’t installed properly in a rental car is fair game.

The Barbers eventually get their divorce, but not without many tears and harsh words. Divorce has turned them into something they are not, or at least something they did not know they were. At no point does Baumbach hint at a reconciliation, so the real tension is whose lawyer can get the better deal. The Barbers just seem to be along for the rocky ride.

Driver, Johansson and Dern are sensational. Johansson’s Nicole always seems to be on the verge of tears, which she holds back until alone. Just when it seems she is being cold and ruthless, she makes some small gesture that shows she has at least some of Charlie’s best interests and all of Henry’s best interests still at heart. Driver is fascinating to watch as he goes from driven to confused to exhausted to explosive to resigned to his fate, sad and then hopeful. Dern is great as Fanshaw. She is a woman who has it all (a highly successful lawyer who also insists on dropping off and picking up her kids from school) and is compassionate about helping women but also can be vicious for her clients. When she tells Nicole that she got her a 55-45 custody split (Nicole wanted it to be 50-50), Fanshaw says she did it just so Charlie’s side couldn’t say they won.

Driver, Johansson and Dern all get chances to stretch out in a movie that seems at times to move in real time. Driver runs through nearly every emotion when he and Nicole decide to talk away from their lawyers. The conversation quickly escalates, and a screaming, threatening Charlie lets out all that has been building up before sobbing and falling to Nicole’s knees. Driver also is mesmerizing when he, post-settlement, vents to his theater company in a bar and then gets up and sings Stephen Sondheim’s “Being Alive,” slightly off-key notes and all. For Johansson, it is the scene in which she recalls the Barbers’ love story; she is comfortable in telling it (she moves freely around Fanshaw’s office as she talks) that it seems we are listening to someone we have known and liked for years. For Dern, it is a speech in which she reminds Nicole how difficult women have it not only in marriage and divorce but in the world in general, just in case Nicole is entertaining thoughts of conceding to the men.

“Marriage Story” is not all gloom and doom. Baumbach has woven in bits of humor (a scene in which Charlie and Henry are observed by a stone-faced case worker provides the funniest moments), though the drama far outweighs the laughs. Marriage and divorce are serious stuff, and “Marriage Story” takes them seriously, but with a sense of humanity and compassion. It is a brilliantly written, directed and performed film that demands to be viewed. It would be a deserving Best Picture Oscar winner.  

My score: 96 out of 100

Should you see it? Yes, it’s a mature, engaging and heartbreaking study of marriage and divorce that features brilliant performances across the board.

[letterboxd]

Icon.

Our world was calm, well ordered, exemplary. Then we met the stars and director of the new sequel Mary Poppins Returns to discuss the legacy of the original, how to follow in Julie Andrews’ footsteps and rapping in a Disney movie.

Even in an era when seemingly every single film exploits something we cherish from childhood, it still feels brazenly sacrilegious to even attempt to sequel-ize Mary Poppins (1964), the iconic and timeless Disney movie.

One of the most universally beloved children’s films of all time, Mary Poppins is deeply imprinted on multiple generations of movie-goers, many of whom spent much of their childhood wishing (or indeed, believing) that Mary Poppins was their nanny.

To tread on such hallowed movie ground is risky indeed, but everyone involved in Mary Poppins Returns seems to realize that, and a great deal of care and attention has been applied to the new film to ensure it honors the original while captivating contemporary audiences.

The film gained a huge amount of instant goodwill from the casting of its title character. Few would argue that there’s anybody better suited to follow in Julie Andrews’ footsteps than Emily Blunt, who is an utter delight in the role. She doesn’t simply “do” Andrews, instead bringing her own flavor to the character, who returns to London to assist in the grown-up lives of her charges from the first film: Michael and Jane Banks, now played by Ben “voice of Paddington” Whishaw and Emily Mortimer, both also fantastic.

The film was directed by Rob Marshall, who in addition to helming 2003 Best Picture Oscar winner Chicago, also previously worked with Blunt on the 2014 adaptation of Stephen Sondheim’s Into The Woods.

Emily Blunt as Mary Poppins.

Joining Blunt in Mary Poppins Returns is musical man of the moment Lin-Manuel Miranda, making his first major big-screen appearance since the phenomenal success of his Broadway smash Hamilton. Miranda is a great student and practitioner of musicals. He wrote many of the beloved songs from the Moana soundtrack, and you can check out his five favorite movie musicals here.

In Mary Poppins Returns, Miranda plays a cockney lamplighter named Jack, revealed to be an apprentice of Bert, Dick Van Dyke’s character from the first film. Well, one of them. In one of many winsome musical numbers, Miranda performs in the the rap-meets-Broadway style he popularized with Hamilton. Rapping. In a Disney movie. Try not to faint.

All the songs are pretty fantastic. They were written by Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman, whose most famous collaboration was the hit Broadway musical Hairspray. Richard B. Sherman, the surviving half of iconic songwriting team the Sherman Brothers (who wrote the songs for Mary Poppins, among other iconic films), is a musical consultant on the film.

The result? Mary Poppins Returns won’t be destined for The Place Where Lost Things Go.

A man has dreams, and Letterboxd’s Dominic Corry had one of his come true when he got in a room in Beverly Hills with Blunt, Miranda and Marshall (and some other press) to discuss the film.

On the pressure of following up such a beloved movie: Rob Marshall: I thought to myself when this came my way, “if anybody is gonna do it, I would like to do it”. It was incredibly daunting at first of course, but I wanted to be able to, in an odd way, protect the first film and treat this film with great care and love. Musicals are very difficult to do, an original musical, there are so many layers to it, but with this one, creating an original musical from scratch was actually for me a dream, and I’ve never done it before and to be able to create it with this beautiful company was exactly what I was hoping for. The guiding message of this film about finding light in the darkness is honestly what drew me to it and kept guiding me throughout the whole process including until this very moment, when people are actually now seeing the film. And I’m just speaking for myself, but I feel people need this film now. I knew that I wanted to live in that world and be part of sending that message out into the world now of looking for hope and light in a dark time.

On how Emily Blunt came to the role: Emily Blunt: I got a voicemail from Rob, who is my dear friend and we have known each other a long time, and the voice mail certainly had a sort of charged energy to it. I was like, “Oh my God, what is it? What is this project?” And when he called me, he said, “We’ve been digging through the Disney archives and by far their most prized possession.” And I was like “What, what is that?” And when he said Mary Poppins, I thought the air changed in the room.

It was so extraordinary, such an extraordinary, rather unparalleled moment for me because I was filled with an instantaneous “yes”, but also with some trepidation, all happening simultaneously in that moment because she is so iconic. She had such a big imprint on my life and on everyone’s lives, you know? People hold this character so close to their hearts. And so how do I create my version of her? What will my version of her be? No one wants to see me do a sort of cheap impersonation of Julie Andrews because no one is Julie Andrews. And so she should be preserved and treasured in her own way for what she did. I knew this was going to be something that I wanted to take a big swing with and I knew I could do it with this man who is the most emboldening, meticulous, brilliant director in the world and I was in safe hands with him. However much I knew I had my work cut out for me.

Rob Marshall and Emily Blunt on set.

On how Blunt sought to differentiate her Mary Poppins from Julie Andrews’ take on the character in the 1964 film: EB: What I decided to do, even though I’d seen it as a child, was not watch the original so close to shooting our version, I think probably because she is so beautiful and so extraordinary, I would have maybe tried to accommodate in some way, and let that sort of bleed into what I wanted to do. So I just decided to go on my gut instinct from the book because she is rather different in all of the books [by P.L. Travers].

If I’m going to carve out new space for myself, it was gonna have to be without watching the details of what Julie did so close to shooting. I have this searing memory of Mary Poppins, but not of all of the tiny details of how she played the character. And so as soon as we wrapped I watched the original. I was just floored by it, and probably relieved that I hadn’t watched it because I was all, “My god, she’s amazing!”.

On how Lin-Manuel Miranda came to be involved in the project: Lin-Manuel Miranda: I remember going to the midnight premiere screening of Chicago at the Ziegfeld Theater [in New York], and seeing the greatest modern movie musical I’d ever seen in my life. So when I got a call from Rob Marshall, and [choreographer] John DeLuca saying, “We’d like to talk to you about something,” that became an immediate priority.

They came to buy me a drink between shows. I was still in Hamilton at the time and I had a two-show day. So I finished the matinee, rolled across the street to the Paramount Hotel and I met them for a drink and they said, “Sequel to Mary Poppins,” and I said, “Who’s playing Mary Poppins?” And they said, “Emily Blunt,” and I said “Oh, that’s good”.

I can’t give them enough credit for seeing this role in me because there is no childlike wonder in Alexander Hamilton. He has a very traumatic early life. He goes on that stage and he wants to devour the world and he wants to move so fast and he wants to do everything, whereas Jack in this movie, as they pitched him to me, has this childlike sense of wonder. He’s in touch with that imagination you all see in your kids when they can sort of play in their own imagination for hours. Jack never lost that and that was I feel so humbled that [Rob] saw that in me. From that moment, from that drink, I was in. It came along at the perfect time for my family too, you know. We had finished a year of performing Hamilton and then I chopped my hair off and left the country and jumped into Mary Poppins’ universe. It was like, beautiful. On rapping in a Disney movie: LM: I would urge you to re-watch the first film. Because everyone who is like, “Wow, there’s rapping in Mary Poppins Returns,” forgets that Bert has a 30-second rap about all the women he dated before Mary Poppins. You’ve forgotten it, but Jolly Holiday is one big flirt between Mary and Bert.

Lin-Manuel Miranda (top center) as Jack.

On balancing reverence with innovation: RM: I really felt that everyone who was a part of this needed to have the first film in their blood in some way because that’s what we were following. I use myself as a barometer because I thought well, what would I want to see? If I came to a sequel to Mary Poppins I would want to see an animation sequence with live action and I would want it to be hand drawn in a 2D world. I would want Cherry Tree Lane to have a curve to it because that’s the Cherry Tree Lane we all know. It was as simple as that, although we were finding our new way. There were sort of goal posts or sign posts throughout that we needed to hold on to because it’s in the DNA of the material.

I knew there needed to be a big huge production number with athletic dancers with Mary and Jack, Jack leading the entire piece. That needed to be in there in some way. I would feel that if it wasn’t there we’ve gone off track. It was this insane balancing act of honoring the first film, but at the same time forging our own way. Marc and Scott were incredibly careful about making sure that we didn’t abuse using [musical] themes from the first film. It’s so easy to use. We used it in very strategic places throughout the film. Most of it actually very much at the end where we feel we’d earned it by then. And that’s what Marc was very careful about doing. I did feel that we were coming from the right place and that was the key.

‘Mary Poppins Returns’ is in cinemas from December 19.

[sitpwgs]

Well instead of the pink vinyl, we got a tour movie announcement!! I'm definitely excited and it will be so cool to watch in theaters and see it again! twenty one pilots also put one of their concerts livestreams in theaters and it was so cool to see everything on the big screen since it wasn't available anywhere else either..and it will be cool cuz they're both my sister and I's favorite artists. I was honestly surprised it was so soon! It's very cool to see the pairs of the surprise songs and how they connect..especially with two songs I wouldn't have thought of! One that came to mind is Evermore and I'm only Me when I'm with You. Probably my favorite song and one of my least favorites..but it was clear when she performed it..it was towards the fans and that made it special. One of my fav artists Soccer Mommy actually did a cover of that song and I think I prefer her version..lol. I love seeing any Lover song getting played and they were so good! Someone also pointed out every song had the word lose in a lyric which is something I wouldn't have thought of.

By the way, I hope you had so much fun seeing Maisie the other night! She really seems like a fun energetic performer. She also has a twin sister and I'm curious why her sister doesn't seem to go on tour with her? Lol. I loveher album..but I actually didn't at first, it had to grow on me. But I wonder why her lyrics seem similar but different to Taylor. Like she wrote a lot about breakups in the album..but by actually mentioning the breakup which I thought was weird. Compared to Taylor who wrote Red the same age as her..but how it's more about heartbreak to me. The only heartbreak song to me is There it Goes I guess..and Wendy is like a mix of Love Story and The Other Side of the Door..but also seems inspired by Cardigan. Maybe cuz it's her 2nd album too..that it reminds me more of Fearless, but Lost the Breakup is pretty similar to We are Never too. It's just something I noticed and was wondering if you had any thoughts on this. I know they are different situations and writers though. Like I have written lyrics referencing both Peter Pan..or not growing up, and a song called History which is nothing like her songs too so I guess I wanted more or something different..idk!

Wow that's so cool about the Night Circus..I had no idea it had the potential to be a musical. The songs were good and it seemed similar to something I was trying to describe with cool sets and costumes. I will definitely read it in October since you recommended it! For Breakfast Club, I thought there might be too many characters to each have their own song and how they're mostly in the same room a lot of the time might make it hard. Another one of my favorites is 10 things I hate about you..but that's based on Taming of the Shrew which is Kiss Me Kate that already exists. I love Funny Face so much and think it could work great as a musical with the costumes and balloon scene and dancing. I heard the Oklahoma revival was a lot darker which might have made some people dislike it but I understand what they were trying to do after reading the article. I think a revival of The Producers or Man of La Mancha are two more I would like to see and any Sondheim musical..maybe Passion or Funny Thing. You could probably make those somewhat different or darker. I actually read an article about the plan to move a new Sondheim musical to Broadway the other day!

The book is just fine to me so far. I'm on chapter 12 but will probably read more today..maybe to chapter 20. I wasn't exactly expecting to love it anyway though. None of the characters stuck out to me so far but I do like reading about family issues in books. It is pretty similar to Some Other Now by Sarah Everett to me though.That one was kinda a love triangle between two brothers but Im not sure if that was going to happen in this book too but that's what i'm thinking so far. Its not a problem being similar but it just gives me something to compare it to i guess. That book I think I did not care for the present part of the story and only liked the past after a while but I'm not having that issue with this book. Like I skipped near the end with that one and I hope it doesn't happen with this book. I do love triangles but only when I have an opinion on it..which is not yet and in that book it was kinda used for suspense or whatever. I have read a lot in a day before and it makes sense to want to finish quickly. It has been nice just focusing on one book for now too. This might be a book I don't have much to say about it so far though so it makes sense that you gave it 3 stars. My reading habits definitely change every week..sometimes I don't read for a few weeks and sometimes I read a bit everyday and sometimes I read a lot in one sitting..like 3 hours..so it really depends on my mood, if I have time,and also the book. I'll see if I can get used to 30 minutes around the same time every day though. Hope you're doing good!

hellloooo friend!! it's been a hot minute! i don't think i've ever seen a concert movie in a cinema but i've seen a fair share of livestreams and other recorded performances — for taylor, and other artists! i do remember going to see the proshot of an american in paris at ipic though, but that definitely has a very different vibe! i love i'm only me when i'm with you — honestly, i think debut is just ... so solid of an album and i have such nostalgic memories with it, but it's just like phenomenal as an album. i'm super curious to see if she'll continue doing a midnights song every night + something else for the international leg, or if she'll mix it up a bit!

god, i love maisie! maisie's genuinely one of my favorite people to see live because her stage presence is just so good but i think she's just such a strong lyricist too. i can't wait to see how her career grows :") i think maisie's sophomore album is really lovely in the fact that "the band and i" is the only real love song on it! and i remember @cages-boxes-hunters-foxes talking about taylor & maisie's songwriting styles and how similar but also also very different they are! i don't really think that lost the breakup / we are never are similar, but i'll give them both a listen in a bit! i personally loved the good witch more than you signed up for this, but i really love you signed up for this (and also trying, dressed too nice for a jacket, etc). maisie has, in my opinion, just always been a very strong songwriter! i also really love seeing how many young singer-songwriters talk about their love of taylor, and seeing how taylor's music has influenced them if that makes sense? like the way maisie's vulnerable in her lyrics ("called my mother in a denny's") reminds me in a way of taylor's? i don't think i'm making a ton of sense right now. but i think you can see taylor's influence in like, griff's music (who i love!! and i'm so happy taylor gave griff a shoutout! griff and maisie have a song together — happy hunting ground) for example, and a lot of younger, gen-z artists.

i saw the 2019 revival of kiss me kate and thought it was fun, but i didn't love it (it was also my intro to kiss me kate, to be fair). i did really appreciate it as an art, but it just wasn't my cup of tea! the oklahoma revival though ... chef's kiss. i think the oklahoma revival, and the spring awakening revival are some of the best revivals we've seen lately. i would love to see more sondheim! i also really loved the recent company revival, and i'm really excited for the tour next year!!

definitely curious about your thoughts on the book + where you are in it now!! 🤍 i'm doing a september readathon with my friend jamie @goodwitchs, so i'm hoping to get back to my usual 15~20 books/month this month after not reading a lot over the summer! hope you're doing well!! <3

[oscartrivia]

All 84 Best Original Song Oscar Winners Ranked Worst to Best (Part 2)

Here’s Part 2 of our ranking of the best (and worst) Oscar selections for Best Original Song. If you haven’t read Part 1 yet, you can start there, or just trust me that you’re only missing the 12 worst songs in Oscar history and just start here!

72. Writing's on the Wall (from Spectre — 2015)

Of all the James Bond songs on this list, this one is the least exciting. For me, Sam Smith’s vocals just make this a strange song. Maybe it’s unfair, but with Adele’s excellent “Skyfall” coming just a few years earlier, this song just doesn’t quite measure up.

71. It Goes Like It Goes (from Norma Rae — 1979)

Norma Rae is an important film, and the lyrics of this song are a sugarcoated version of John Lennon’s “Working Class Hero” without the bite. The melody is  uninspired, and overall the song is a waste of Jennifer Warnes considerable vocal talents.

70. I'm Easy (from Nashville — 1975)

“I’m Easy” is a perfectly pleasant little country ditty, but there’s nothing particularly special about it. Nashville is full of songs with more energy and more fun than this one.

69. The Weary Kind (Theme From Crazy Heart) (from Crazy Heart — 2009)

Crazy Heart may have just suffered from poor timing--it’s core song “The Weary Kind” has some of the heart that “I’m Easy” lacks, but the film itself pales in comparison to Country Strong which came just a year later and told a story that has some big similarities. It was also a shame to see this song win over “Loin de Paname” (one of the best foreign-language songs ever nominated for an Oscar), and over a pair of ditties from The Princess and the Frog that handed Randy Newman his 17th and 18th Oscar losses.

68. Born Free (from Born Free — 1966)

This song has a certain nostalgic value for people from a certain era, but its soaring crescendos just aren’t enough to lift this song out of the basement of this list. There’s nothing terrible about “Born Free,” it’s just a song that doesn’t hold up 50+ years later.

67. You'll Never Know (from Hello, Frisco, Hello — 1943)

A sweet but forgettable little ditty from a film that could be described the same way. Somehow, though, the best version of this song came when the original performer, Alice Faye, sang it again over 40 years later:

66. Sweet Leilani (from Waikiki Wedding — 1937)

The legendary Bing Crosby sang 14 nominated songs over the years, starting with 1934′s “Love in Bloom” all the way to 1960′s “The Second Time Around.” The songs range from outright classics (we’ll talk about “White Christmas” and “Swinging on a Star” much later) to oddities like “Zing a Little Zong” to my personal favorite, 1945′s “Ac-Cen-Tchu-Ate the Positive.” While “Sweet Leilani” isn’t the worst of the bunch, it does fall on the blander side, especially compared to the rest of Bing’s body of work.

65. Sooner Or Later (I Always Get My Man) (from Dick Tracy — 1990)

Say one thing for this tune: its appeal has long outlived that of the film it originated from. The double entendre and lyrical wordplay are trademarks of its author, Stephen Sondheim, but what actually makes this song halfway decent is Madonna’s sultry vocal performance.

64. Arthur's Theme (Best That You Can Do) (from Arthur — 1981)

I’m not entirely sure what “If you get caught between the moon and New York City, the best that you can do is fall in love.” actually means. And I’ve spent more time than I should admit thinking about it. It seems like it’s calling NYC a romantic place, but I’m just not sure that’s what the words mean. Anyways, this song is a bit of an earworm sometimes. Not too bad, but nothing too special either. And it beat out what I think is one of the better James Bond flick themes, Sheena Easton singing “For Your Eyes Only.”

63. Baby, It's Cold Outside (from Neptune's Daughter — 1949)

This perennial Christmas favorite has been the subject of much discussion over the years about whether it holds up against modern sensibilities (particularly the “what’s in this drink” line). The cringeworthiness of the songs outward premise—that a woman is trying to leave and a man is trying to coerce her into spending the night—may not take into account the context of the film or the era, but that doesn’t invalidate the critique itself. The best songs are timeless, and this song is problematic in the #MeToo era. Those factors bumped it down on this list, below songs with less catchy melodies and much less staying power.

62. Mona Lisa (from Captain Carey, U.S.A. — 1950)

It’s hard to dislike any song with Nat King Cole’s velvety vocals. This song is a bit simplistic, and seems to have literally nothing to do with the film it originates from...it’s just a song about a painting, apropos of nothing. 

61. It's Hard Out Here For A Pimp (from Hustle & Flow — 2005)

I distinctly remember being very annoyed when this song won the Oscar. Unlike the previous entry on this list, “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp” definitely fits into the film it comes from, and it’s indicative of music in the the genre and era it occupies, but the lyrics are still a bit hard to swallow. To make matters worse, the song beat out Dolly Parton’s beautiful, heartwarming “Travelin’ Through,” which deserved far more accolades than it received. Despite its issues, though, “It’s Hard Out Here for a Pimp” falls squarely in the “so-so” section of this list for it’s peppy, catchy beat and its groundbreaking status as the first hip-hop winner of Best Song.