#sometimes you gotta think you are in fact the hottest shit

[dykedreaming]

hot girl* summer

*dyke creature

ze/hir

[caspercryptid]

Yoo those full-face sunglasses look awesome, I'm interested in getting a pair after seeing that post but I gotta ask- how does breathing work? Does it not fog up the inside/get uncomfortably hot in there?

The one I got claimed that it was fogproof which was not.... Entirely true. Generally it didn't fog up TOO bad but The problem with buying cheap shit on Amazon is that you kind of get a mixed bag sometimes? Like some of them are going to be good and some of them are going to be just fucking awful and sometimes you have to just buy more than one and hope you don't get a lemon.

It is a little warm in there NGL I stuck to it during the school year so from fall through spring so I didn't have it on during the hottest part of the year— The actual worst part of the heat for me was the fact that I Was wearing it for migraine coverage so I put a beanie on over it? And the beanie was way hotter than the mask itself got. The mask itself actually helps I think because your face isn't in full sun It's in the shade and it's reflective in a way that isn't exactly Absorbing Heat.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Horror Villains React to: Their S/O Receiving an Unsolicited Dick Pick (not from them)

Warnings: Unsolicited Dick Pic reception, some explicit references and references to impending violence/gore

~

Animal the Cannibal: Honestly quite disturbed. Why?? Why would he do this to us Y/N??

Baby Firefly: “Let’s cut it off.” Baby’s more than happy to track this loser down and slice the appendage off (And nail it to the wall while he watches).

Billy Loomis: Woah- he did not need to see that. No homo.

Bo Sinclair: What the fuck Y/N?? Who is this guy?? Here, you guys can send the guy one back- show him what a real dick looks like-

Bubba Sawyer: Bubba is not as startled as you might think. Do you think Chop Top and/or Nubbins didn’t run around without clothes for a good portion of their lives like the feral little monsters they are? Do you think that they still don’t do that sometimes?? Bubba is not afraid of dick. He’s just confused as to why this dude would send a picture of it to you?

Candyman: Seeing another man’s dick out was not how Daniel foresaw his day going… but I guess that’s how his day is going… He’s mostly just quite sad about this man’s attempt at woo-ing you. This is just… what has happened to gentlemen?

Captain Spaulding: He’s laughing, because its so small!!-

Carrie White: What… what??! Why?? That’s what those look like??? Carrie is very startled, as anyone seeing their first penis is-

Chop Top Sawyer: Not surprised, not mad, not disgusted… oddly fascinated, though XD

Chucky Lee Ray: “Well… “*Cackling* “You did ask him what was up, doll- “

Debbie Loomis: Ugh, men.

Dr Suave: *Getting out the tooth drill* “Yeah… this should do the trick.”

Drayton Sawyer: Drayton has lost his mind …again. He’s so mad, and he’s mad at everyone. He’s mad at the guy, he’s mad at the phone company, he’s mad at you- Like WHAT!? Why would you SHOW HIM THIS SHIT?? Now he’s gonna have that filthy thing in his head all damn day… And you’re not gonna hear the end of it.

Freddy Krueger: Like Chucky, he finds this to be quite hilarious and has plenty of jokes cued up. You made a mistake by showing him. He’s never gonna shut up.

Granny Boone: Oooooh, let her see let her see!!

Harper Alexander: Billy Vol. 2, except its MAX Homophobic. Like, that’s disgusting Y/N. He doesn’t wanna see that. He’s not gay. Put that away. (In fact he’s just discovered a new slogan. He’s not gay, put that away)

Inkubus: “What is that picture of? Its so small… Oh. That’s very sad.”

Jason Voorhees: Do not show him. Just do not. Tell me, do you want to keep your phone? Because if you show him, its gonna get flung across camp like the hottest of potatoes.

Jedidiah Sawyer: … *Sigh*. He’s too tired for this. // Already on his way out the door though with his chainsaw. Gotta take care of this for you.

Jennifer Check: … Gross. // Look who’s gonna be her next meal, though?

Jerry Dandridge: Similar to Inkubus, Jerry’s just like this is… pitiful. He finds it pretty amusing, too, another man trynna whoo you like that. So stupid.

Jill Roberts: What the fuck is wrong with men?

Kieran Wilcox: The type to have to show you, then and there, what you already have.

Leslie Vernon: I feel like Leslie would be like *Big sigh and eye roll* ‘Men… ’, and then go back to whatever he was doing without realising the irony in his words.

Lester Sinclair: … that ain’t right. Lester actually checks if you’re okay, receiving something like that.

Luda Mae Hewitt: Luda Mae has 2 sons, so like Bubba penis does not disturb her. She just squints at it and, like, half chuckles before returning to her newspaper, shaking her head. Like, this is casual. Whatever. She doesn’t care. Oh you’ll be fine. What you have to worry about, is dinner tonight.

Max Grief: … Slowly loading his gun and then heading out the door to his car. Also quite upset about seeing a dick that’s not his.

Mayor Buckman: What on gods green earth!?- // News at 10, old man locked himself up in his house all day and won’t come out.

Mental Manny: … Ha. That’s pathetic.

Michael Myers: Depending on whether its Halloween or not, he might just go like ‘huh’ (Silently) and go back to his TV watching. If it is Halloween though, well then he’s got one more stop to make.

Mickey Altieri: “Hm, yeah… so I might be bisexual- what!? Would you be into that?? Could we explore that??”

Midnight Man: … Why? // Why do human males feel the need to plaster their reproductive organs everywhere? Is it a mating ritual? Would you like to see his?

Monty Hewitt: … *Eyeroll* I’m too old for this.

Otis B. Driftwood: *Currently nailing that dick up to the wall and admiring his art*

Pamela Voorhees: *Cut to Pam with a cleaver outside this man’s house, a white apron on and a psychotic smile on her face* Hello dear, I’m just going around the neighbourhood offering medical procedures! Would you like a free castration?~

Patrick Bateman: Pat is in the ‘Lets send him our own pics back’ club with Bo. Except his are a lot more explicit. Pictures of his own cock half in you, or shoved down your throat, etc.

Pennywise: *Very childish voice* Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww…

Piper Shaw: “Okay let’s take care of this quick- “*Takes your phone and sends back a gif some horror movie* “There, done. I have a mass murder to plan out.”

Rocco the Clown: *Crushes a banana in his hand* // Also the type to fuck you then just to prove himself.

Roman Bridger: *Pained expression* “… Did you have to show me that?” “If I have to live with this image I’m not doing it alone.”

Sheriff Hoyt: He’s so mad 😅😅 Just let him go find the guy, he needs this and it’s the least bad thing he’s likely to do.

Stu Macher: “Can you tell him to send another, next to a ruler? I just wanna check- “

Stuart Lloyd: … “Do you think I could use you both in a film?- Y/N, where are you going?” Man has a one-track mind, just walk away.

The Clown: Its not a finger… but he can work with it. *Flips open butterfly knife*

The Deathslinger: “… Just fuckin’ shoot me.”

The Djinn: Like the Midnight Man ^^ Except he’s more frustrated and exasperated because he knows its stupid and gross.

The Huntress: She and Carrie are freaking out seeing dicks for the first time. There’s nothing cute about that thing?? She will chop it off with her hatchet!-

The Man: “Address?”

Taxidermist: Walter is Disturbed.

Tiffany Valentine: “That’s okay honey, we’ll take care of that old asshole.” *Heating up a kitchen knife with a lighter*

Thomas Hewitt: Thomas… is very unimpressed. Very deadpanned. Thumbs down.

Vincent Sinclair: *Shrugs* He’s delt with plenty naked bodies before, he’s an artist and he has chosen a very hands-on medium- and also, this guy is unspectacular.  

Winslow Foxworth Coltrane: Genuinely quite good-humoured about it- he knows you’re his and he doesn’t need to feel threatened by this guy harassing you. Laughs about it.

[hoodieofholland]

Omg congrats!!! I just can't stop thinking about Tom making reader squirt for the first time and she's all embarrassed by it but tom is assuring her that it was hot af 🌷

Thank youu! Sorry for taking that long, but here we go! Also i got a little carried away, dont mind it

Warnings: SMUT (+18), dom!tom, slight degradation (name calling), fingering (f), squirting, unprotected sex, typos for sure.

You couldn't lie and say you didn't deserve what was happening right, you had been a tease the whole day with Tom, walking around the house in nothing but his t-shirt, no panties in the way, bending every now and then just to pick something you dropped on purpose, and massaging his shoulders every time you made a shitty excuse to go and talk to him while he was working.

And now there were you, head dizzy, chest coming up and down in panting breathing while you approached your high for the fourth time in a row... or maybe it was the sixth? You couldn't remember anymore. Tom was edging you for so long that all you could sense now was the wetness between your legs, the squeaky sounds it made when his two fingers entered your throbbing pussy with determination.

"Are you close, my love?", he asks, his chest vibrating against your back, his lips on your ear, bitting your skin slightly from time to time. You bite your lips, too scared of the tricky question, but still too aware that it was nonsense keeping it from him -- Tom knew when you were close. He knew your body from your head to toe.

"Yes, Tommy", you whine lowly, voice lost in between your moans and incoherent pleads for release. "Please- let me come".

"Course, darling", though his voice held nothing but sweetness, you knew it wouldn't work that easy. He took his fingers out of you and you squirmed in protest. "But only when I'm sure my girl has learnt her lesson. Do you understand why I'm doing this? Eh?"

He grips your jaw, making you look at him. You can feel his hard cock against your back, throbbing with every movement you make towards him.

"Yes", you drawl, too weak to answer something else. In front of you, there's a mirror, the one that is always standing in your shared bedroom. Tom liked to keep it that way, so whenever you both felt like it, he'd fuck you in front of it. Usually, you loved it, you loved watching yourself come undone, watching Tom take control and fuck you to oblivion. But today, today was different.

You were a mess, completely wrecked, and though you loved the fact that it was Tom who made you feel like this, you wanted to reach your high desperately.

"Everything okay?", he asks, peppering kisses along your jaw. He always made sure to ask before going back to edging you again. You nod your head, but it's not enough. "What's the word, sweetheart?"

"Green... green, you can- keep going", you respond, bitting your lips and closing your eyes and his hand slides down your inner thigh, so close to your heat. "Please, I wanna cum".

Tom gives you a harsh slap there and you jolt. "You're gonna get what I give you, brat. What is it? Did you not learn a fucking thing?"

You exhale a sharp breathe and shake your head. "I'm sorry, Tommy. I'll be good, I promise".

"You sure are", he smirks, rubbing the skin smoothly. "Cause you're my good little thing, aren't you?"

You nod and try to reach his lips, turning your head to the side. He kisses you deeply, but only for a brief moment. "You wanna take my cock?"

Before you can realise, you're whining in response, trying to grind your ass against his length. "Fuck, you're so greedy", he moans in your ear. "I'm gonna give it to you, pretty girl. C'mere".

You manage to adjust your position to align yourself with him, knees on bed as you feel your arousal slipping between your legs. Tom's eyes are fixed in your ass, teeth grazing his lower lip as his hands are gripping your waist to help you align your entrance with his cock.

He teases you a bit more, his red tip brushing your clit until you are forcing yourself down on him. This wasn't supposed to be something you'd do, but fortunately for you, Tom didn't seem to mind this time, too anxious to get your walls hugging him tightly.

"Fuck, always so bloody tight, darling", he moans, planting his feet on the mattress before starting to pound into you. "No matter how many times I fuck this hole".

You whimper, your belly already tightening as your high was close already. "Tommy, please, don't stop".

Tom chuckles between whines coming from the back of his throat, "You like begging to me, don't you, baby? Don't even have to ask, my greedy little thing".

Your head falls back and Tom gets the chance to grip your jaw and kiss you hard, lips messy and sometimes losing their contact as he thrusts his hips deeper, faster, making the sounds of your skin slapping echo through the room.

"Shit, Tom, I'm gonna- I'm gonna cum", you moan, your walls clenching around him viciously.

But before you can finally enjoy your sweet release, Tom pushes you towards the mattress, making you gasp in surprise. Your hair was all over the place, the palm of your hands laying flat against the mattress as your confused brain tries to catch on what was happening before Tom pulls out of you just to bottom out in a precise and deep thrust, the last one before he pulls out again.

"This is not how it works, sweetheart. Didn't learn anything, did you? Turn around, brat", he commands and you do as you're told, rolling on bed before he takes a hold of both of your wrists and pin your hands above your head. "You have to ask for it, love", he slaps the each one of your inner tights and you arch your back in pleasure and pain. "Thought it was pretty obvious by now".

"Fuck, fuck, 'm sorry, Tommy. Please, lemme cum", you cry out, bucking your hips towards him, but all you get is a mischievous smirk.

"You're gonna come, baby, but only after I'm finished. How does it sound, eh? Do you want my cum, pretty girl?"

You nod eagerly, licking your lips as he releases your hands. He takes a hold of his cock on one hand, lazily stroking it, and takes your hand on the other one, bringing it to his mouth. He places a kiss on the tip of your fingers, "You're gonna play with your clit f'me, alright? But you're not cumming. Do you understand me?"

"Yes, Tommy", you whimper, bitting your lips as he licks your finger, spreading wetness before placing them over your bundle of nerves, and you start to give it slow circle motions, trying not to apply too much pressure to not cum before time.

"Yeah, baby, like that", he moans, fastening the movements of his hand over his length. "Oh, fuck, you're so gorgeous, 'm so fucking lucky".

You moan, breathing getting heavier as you bite your lips hard to hold yourself back.

"I'm close, darling", his shoulders fall towards you, his back curving as his high approaches violently. "Spread your legs a bit more"

"Cum on me, Tommy", you said, widening your legs, giving him enough view of your soaked core.

It took him only a few more intense strokes before he came, his white hot cum falling all over your pussy, making you clench around nothing. "Fuck, fuck", he rode himself through his high, eyes heavy as he tried to keep a look on you, on your bare pussy, your wetness and his cum painting you like a goddamn work of art. "Shit, look at you", he pants, recovering from his orgasm. "Gotta make you cum, pretty girl. Been so good to me".

You nod eagerly and jolt slightly when he slaps his hand over yours, taking it away from your clit and replacing with his thumb.

Tom straightened himself over bed, his eyes never leaving yours and he got down on you, his lips hungry and precise to make you cum as quick as possible and put and end to your suffering. You close your eyes, tilting your head back as your mouth falls open to a silent moan that gets stuck on the back of your throat.

Tom's fingers enters you and he doesn't take longer to curl them inside of you, making you whine and squirm with the closeness of your high.

"C'mon, love, you can cum now, cum on my mouth, pretty girl", he hums against your pussy lips, licking until he hits your clit, his fingers never stopping his work.

The edges, the great amount of stimulation, everything comes back to you as you orgasm hits your body, making you shiver and your body start to tremble. You moan Tom's name loudly, and he takes a hold of your hand when you starts to fist the sheets so strongly it gets your knuckles to turn white.

"Fuck, fuck, oh, my-", you let it all go away and feel the wetness of the sheets beneath you, while your hips buck towards Tom's face.

"Shit", you hear him gasp, taking his fingers out of you. You open your eyes slowly, breathing still coming in pants, and it takes a little while until you can focus on anything.

The first thing that you see is Tom's face covered in wetness, but it's not like other times he eats you out. His chin is visibly covered on it, and when you prop your elbows on the mattress to take a better look, you see his hands also covered on it. The sheets have a big stain of your cum and you can already feel your face turning red.

"You squirted", Tom said, eyes twinkling with something you couldn't recognize at first, a smirk on his face, but embarrassed as you felt, you assumed he was going to make fun of it.

"Oh, my God, I'm sorry", you whined, covering your face with your hands. "Shit, I've never- I've never done that before, I'm really sorr-"

"What?", Tom gasped, taking your hands out of your face. The smirk was still there, his brown eyes deep and bright. "What are you apologizing for?"

You blink, a bit confused at first.

"Don't you- uh, don't you think it's... gross?"

Tom scoffs, shaking his head. "Are you kidding me? That was the hottest thing I've ever seen", he said, eyebrows cocking. "And what the fuck, you mean, this was your first time doing it?"

You nod sheepishly and his smirk turn somehow even more cocky. "Fuck it, we need to do that again", he shakes his head un disbelief, leaning in to kiss you. You can taste yourself, "You're so fucking hot, darling, can't believe you're all mine".

You sigh in relief, easing yourself and letting yourself enjoy the kiss and the bliss you were still on after the intense orgasm. Eventually, Tom made you get out of bed, carrying you to a hot bath to take care of you and some light sores you might have gotten, but he didn't let you go get some rest before making sure you knew that was the first time, but not the last.

[thealexchen]

Any cute after ending bird squad headcanons (chenrich / stay)?

OH MY GOD I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED. I missed writing headcanons so much! I’m gonna take Gabe’s entire prediction as what really happened: Alex starts working in the record store with Steph, they still perform together, and Alex hangs out regularly with Ryan, Ethan, Charlotte, and Riley.

After a lucky dice roll a few weeks after the events of chapter 5, Steph blurts out the “Will you be my girlfriend?” question during a DnD game. Alex is momentarily stunned because it really was an impulsive question and Steph hadn’t even been thinking about it beforehand, so Alex never picked up on an aura. Then a slow grin creeps across Alex's face as she says, “Wait… did you wait until you rolled a nat-20 to ask that?” Steph giggles, “Maybe?” Alex smiles and says “of course I will, dork,” leans across the table, and kisses her. Steph’s joy aura is so bright that Alex suddenly bursts out laughing and can barely get out, “And you’re such a nerd!” before she buries her face in her hands.

Ryan is thrilled for Alex and just envelops her in a bone-crushing hug when Alex tells him. They remain good friends and Alex nicknames him “golden boy” after their joyful moment at the ravine :) Now that Alex and Steph are splitting their hours at the record store, Alex usually takes the earlier morning shifts and then goes on hikes with Ryan. He takes her to the spots he used to take Gabe and they reminisce together. Sometimes they laugh, other times they cry, but Alex is always grateful for his company.

After Steph and Alex start dating, Ryan gets in this weird habit of calling the other two “ladies.” Since Steph and Alex are together so often, he just starts addressing them as a couple: “Morning, ladies!” “How’s the weather, ladies?” “I’ll leave you to it then, ladies.” “You ladies totally killed that set last night!" But then he still calls Steph “dude” so she’s just more confused than ever.

The closest thing to an argument that Steph and Alex have is Alex's proposed “renovations” to the record store, which include… a CD rack of various animal calls and a magazine rack with subscriptions to National Geographic. Alex tries to convince Steph, “Now that we’re both working here, Ryan practically spends all his waking hours here anyway. Come on, you gotta think like a businesswoman!” Steph grumbles, “I’d rather think like a DJ.”

Alex and Steph have 30 jam-packed events for every day of Pride Month. On June 1st, their broadcast goes in and out because Steph and Alex are both trying to hog the microphone, announcing “Happy Pride Month from Haven’s hottest—“ “most musical—“ “greatest couple! With the best music taste!”

On ace pride day (yes I love the ace Ryan headcanon), Alex triumphantly drapes an ace pride cape over Ryan's shoulders and announces, "And now for some asexual awareness facts from our favorite birdwatcher!" Steph expects Ryan to be nervous at the mic, but he has shockingly good control of his voice. She later says "I never thought I'd say this but... you really have a voice for radio. Color me impressed."

Ryan buys a friendship necklace from Claire’s for Alex’s birthday in July as a total joke (@secrettunnelyeah's idea) but Steph texts in the group chat later that night “HOLY SHIT IT GLOWS IN THE DARK!!” followed by Alex adding “IT DOES INDEED” and Ryan just asks “Are you both five?” Alex and Steph badger Ryan with “but it glows in the DARK” for the next week just to mess with him. After that, it becomes an inside joke— every time Ryan complains about something, literally anything, (“I’d like to go, but it’s so far away” or “It’s like 90 degrees today!”) Steph and Alex reply, “But iT GLOWS IN THE DARK RYAN!"even if it makes no sense.

Alex is much better at controlling her empathy powers, but being around Steph for 6-8 hours a day means that her emotional thoughts run in a loop in Alex’s head almost like an unending radio broadcast. One time, she’s writing down inventory and accidentally catches herself writing “my girlfriend is so beautiful” because that’s what she was hearing in her head, and she laughs. But it’s worse on air: another time, she’s reading an ad when she says, “Spamp’s is having their end of summer sale on… man, Alex looks so good in that shirt today— oh my God. That wasn’t... what I meant to say… um… we’ll be right back!” She turns off the mic, storms out of the booth, and bursts out in exasperation, “STEPH! Oh my God. I love you, but you need to stop staring at me when I read ads!” Steph just stammers, “You love me?” Alex realizes that was the first time she's said it out loud. She crumples into relieved, confused laughter and walks over to give Steph a hug and kiss her forehead. Alex sighs, “Yeah, I do. I love you. But like, please stop having such loud thoughts."

The whole goose prank story becomes an inside joke for Alex and Ryan. It starts out with Ryan saying “Remember that time…” but the joke deteriorates so much that all Ryan has to do is whisper “property of the crown” to Alex and then she’s on the floor laughing. The best part is, they never explain the joke to Steph, so she’s just bewildered as to why that random phrase makes her girlfriend cry-laugh every time.

Halloween is still a difficult time of year for Steph and Alex can tell, so she, Ryan, and Ethan organize a town-wide, epic sequel to the LARP. This time, Steph the witch is the protagonist on a quest to save her kidnapped bard, except the end reveals it wasn’t a kidnapping at all but a surprise role-play wedding. When Steph “frees” Alex, Alex swoons dramatically “MY HERO!” and kisses Steph in front of everyone. Steph pulls Alex into a hug and whispers, “Thank you. This is exactly what I needed.” Steph holds her close and realizes that for the first time in years, she hadn’t fixated on Arcadia Bay at all.

Charlotte invites the bird gang plus Riley over for Thanksgiving. Ethan is so proud of himself because he made sweet potato casserole for the first time all by himself. He insists that everyone go around and list what they’re thankful for. Alex just sighs happily and says, “This is gonna sound so cheesy but… everything. A year ago, I couldn’t even imagine I’d be here, surrounded by such great company and such good food.” She feels everyone’s joyful auras throughout the entire meal and can’t stop smiling. 

On New Year’s Eve, Steph claims she has a cold and can’t run the radio show. Alex knows she’s bullshitting, but she plays along and takes calls by herself that night until someone slides a letter under the door. It’s from Steph, Charlotte, and Ryan with a scavenger hunt for her. After finding all the clues, Alex learns that they got a bar stool engraved with her name in The Black Lantern (now under new ownership since Jed was arrested), along with a note from Steph to call her. She does and Steph says “So… I’m not actually sick. Meet me on the bridge?” Alex joins the other residents just in time for New Year’s fireworks. Ethan is cheering even before the countdown, but it’s otherwise quiet. Alex unwinds her scarf from around her neck and drapes it over her friends’ shoulders, pulling them close enough to whisper, “I’m so glad Gabe had you.” “And now you have us,” Ryan says softly. Just then, the countdown starts and then 2019 is over. Alex cheers her heart out as her first year in Haven comes to a close and the fireworks explode overhead until she’s lost her voice. She’s happy.

Bonus: Lunar New Year 2020 was on January 25th, 2020. The entire town teams up to throw an authentic celebration for Alex, because she hasn't gotten to properly celebrate in years. Charlotte helps put together a lion costume and Ethan gets so excited rehearsing for the lion dance. Eleanor makes red floral arrangements and hangs paper lanterns on every corner. Ryan and Steph work tirelessly all day to make as many traditional dishes as they can, based on what Gabe taught them, and they lead Alex on a guided tour down Main Street to show her everything they set up. The final event is New Year's dinner, and Alex starts happy crying because she hadn't realized how much she missed all of this. Most of all, she wishes Gabe could be here, but she knows he had many happy new year's with his friends before she arrived :)

Thank you so much for a headcanon ask! It’s been over 2 months since the last one and I’d loved to be inspired and write again now that we have all this content!

[ficforce]

Handle With Care

Shinmon Benimaru x F!Reader

SFW

No set timeline

Established relationship

The weather was particularly hot and on days like this, the Town was quieter during the afternoon. People were content to stay in the shade to drink and talk, even the children were willing to wait for the sun to move a little in the sky to cool things down before they played again. Y/N hummed softly to herself as she continued to knit a new blanket for the Guardhouse’s supply. It was an unfortunate fact that sometimes people’s homes got destroyed when someone turned Infernal but the Hikeshi always did their best to provide for their people.

She looked up when a shadow crossed over her and smiled at the man stood in her light, a bored-looking expression on his face, “You’re in my light, Benimaru.” She pat the space beside her on the raised walkway of her friend’s home and the Captain dropped down beside her, “I was going to come home as soon as I finished this blanket, my friend came back early so I wasn’t stuck babysitting all day.” Y/N watched as Benimaru picked up the corner of the blanket to take a closer look at her handy work, “Were you passing by or looking for me?”

“Looking.” Benimaru next picked up one of her needles and gave a small grunt as he accidentally dropped it onto the ground where it seemed to simply vanish, “…Shit. Sorry, Y/N.” He knew she hated when he messed with her tools, he glanced at her face and her soft sigh felt as bad as being told off, “I’ll make sure to pick some new ones up.”

Shaking her head, she finished off the row and put everything down on her lap, “It’s okay, they were getting a little blunt for needlework.” Benimaru watched her reach to the side and hold up her flask, the outside was cracked and the handle broken, “Could you get me a new one of these?”

He blinked at it in silence; wasn’t that one only a few weeks old?

Then he realised that she probably hadn’t had enough to drink, he’d watched her prepare the tea the previous night so that it would be perfect for icing but it seemed her effort had gone to waste.

“Sure,” it was then his crimson gaze caught sight of the tea stain on her favourite yukata, “Did you drop it all over yourself?”

“I was drinking it and then someone walked into me… it was just an accident.” She didn’t dare tell him that the guy who walked into her called her a klutz and gave her a shove - it wasn’t worth the man being beaten to a pulp over a flask and her clothing.

“Tch, they could have offered to replace it for you” He sat up straighter, “Who was it?” he knew Y/N was too kind to make a fuss; she was always letting things like this slide even when it wasn’t her fault. Benimaru wished she would get mad sometimes, she wasn’t weak in the slightest and nor was she shy. She was just too damn nice.

It meant that, sometimes, she was taken advantage of.

He had hoped that maybe it would stop once they became an official couple but it was just the same. “Benimaru, It’s okay, it was just an accident.” She reached over to stroke his cheek and he huffed, “Did you fix the bar you broke last night? I went and apologised for the mess this morning, the owner was still sweeping up glass.”

“Y/N?!” The man she has walked into rushed to help her up and began apologising for knocking her down, explaining that he had been wrestling with two of the other guys there. “We were just messing - you okay?”

“It wouldn’t have happened if that guy hadn’t have touched you…” She should have been firmer in telling the drunk to get lost but she had asked so nicely the man laughed and grabbed her again. “You’re too forgiving, Y/N. If I didn’t know you could handle it I would worry all the time.” Benimaru leaned over and pressed a kiss to her cheek, “I’ll get you a new flask whilst I’m out with Konro. The Twins found something suspicious so we’re gonna check it out.”

Once the hottest part of the day was over, Asakusa bloomed back into life and Y/N headed to the butcher to pick up something a little special - the Hikeshi had been working flat out and she figured they deserved a little something. Not all of the Hikeshi lived in the guardhouse; some of them had their own homes and families. They only stayed on the nightshifts, if there was a party or if Benimaru had totalled their house. Most of the time everyone liked to meet in the evening and share a meal; this often included wives, girlfriends and children. Dinner was often loud and fun but it meant the kitchen was always busy during the day.

Removing her shoes at the genkan and stepping up into the main room Y/N walked straight into another body. She let out a surprised yelp and fell backwards onto the floor.

The other laughed, “Not if he’s gotta refer to that cripple, Konro. If you can’t fight then just die, ya know!”

Smiling at the three grown men who looked like scolded kids, she shook her head, “It was an accident, don’t worry about it, okay?” Her elbow throbbed a little but it wasn’t worth mentioning, “I’m going to get changed then help out with dinner. You three make sure you don’t hurt each other.”

“Y/N, you’re too nice! Waka woulda kicked our asses.”

“You can have a free hit, we’re men, we can take it!”

Y/N waved them off, “You’ll have to do far worse than knock me down to get a reaction, boys.” It wasn’t that she wasn’t annoyed or that she didn’t want to knock their heads together - she just didn’t like to lose her temper over small things. Maybe she was too forgiving and maybe she was a bit of a doormat but she had people who liked or loved her to get mad on her behalf.

Placing the shopping down at the doorway of her shared room with Benimaru, Y/N removed her yukata and tossed it into the laundry basket before pulling out a fresh one from the drawers. She liked the colour of this one; she also liked that the twins had picked it especially for her to do chores in. It wasn’t like she had to help out around the Guardhouse but she liked doing it… she couldn’t slack just because her lover was the Captain.

Grabbing the shopping on her way toward the kitchen she hummed quietly to herself, grabbing the sliding door to enter she paused when she heard her name from the other side.

“Do you think she’ll notice?”

Another male voice scoffed at that, “Even if she does she’ll not do anything, she’s such a wet blanket - why’s Shinmon even with her?”

“Maybe she’s just a really good lay?” It was only two voices, surprising as the kitchen should have been busier but she recognised the voices as two of the new recruits. They didn’t know her… they had no right to be talking about her this way.

She had heard it before, people made fun of her, they tried to take advantage of her too but she could usually ignore it. Once she got in there she knew they’d be too cowardly to say it to her face.

“She suits him, Shinmon is pretty pathetic - sure he’s strong but he’s not cut out to lead.”

Y/N’s hands were shaking as anger coiled low in her belly, her usual calm demeanour cracking as they mocked the people she loved most. They could say what they wanted about her but that was her family and she couldn’t just ignore that. “Well, the poison I picked up should be enough to see the Lieutenant and kids off. Just gotta hope if weakens Shinmon enough for us to handle him - then we get the old gang back together and take the town. Fucking Hikeshi think they run the place.”

Her eyes widened as she heard their plan, her mind going blank as she dropped the bag she had been carrying and slid open the door to the kitchen.

x - -

Hinata and Hikage both sneezed at the same time and Hikage complained loudly, “Someone’s talking about us!” Hinata nodded and then they both let out a surprised squeal as the ground shook slightly. Running to Konro, they each grabbed his pant leg and looked up at the smoke rising in the distance.

“An Infernal?” Konro looked at Benimaru whilst placing his hands on the girls, “…The alarm isn’t sounding though.” They were already on their way back from investigating what they had thought was a White Clad hideout but turned out to be a secret club for a bunch of kids playing ‘gangs’.

“Not an infernal.” Benimaru answered and squinted at the sky, “There’s a lot of heat and I didn’t hear any explosions…”

“Y/N!” Konro yelled as he got through the crowd and started shouting orders to have everyone moved back, “You’re gonna hurt someone! The fire is already spreading out of control!” She didn’t seem to be able to hear him and he knew she’d never forgive herself for causing this much destruction, “We’ll fix it, Y/N, just stop!”

Benimaru and Konro seemed to realise at the same moment what was happening and Benimaru called up one of his matoi, “What set her off?”

From above it was easier to see that a large crowd had formed outside the Guardhouse, smoke billowed off the burning blue flag that hung by the entrance and he could see part of the wall of the Guardhouse was blown out into the street.

There were a few Hikeshi trying to stamp out the sea of blue flames before they jumped from house to house and in the middle was Y/N.

Benimaru hopped off the matoi once he was close enough to the ground, standing between her and two cowering men, “Y/N.” He hadn’t seen her like this before, he had heard she could get angry but he had never once witnessed it; the bottom of her yukata was burning from the intensity of her ability and her eyes blazed. The way her face contorted in rage was so different from her usual calm expression, all of her anger was on the men behind him, “Whatever they did I’ll handle it - you need to cool down before you get hurt!”

Her ability had one of the highest temperatures on record, she had burnt him on occasion and Benimaru knew that she could burn out fast, he could see her chest heaving already as her oxygen ran low. “Y/N!”

Benimaru approached her after getting a few of his guys to grab the two battered men Y/N wanted to cremate, he reached for her shoulder and just before he could touch her he felt a sharp pain in his stomach and stumbled back a few feet.

She sent two tendrils of flame towards the men behind Konro, they skirted past Benimaru and Konro to catch the clothing of her targets. They screamed in fear as their clothing burnt and the heat started to break through their resistance, the Hikeshi holding them let go immediately. Her hand raised to deliver the finishing blow - she’d lost her senses. All she wanted was for the two men to vanish, to stop existing so that they could never hurt her family again.

“Enough!” Strong arms wrapped around her, Benimaru’s clothing began to smoke within seconds - her yukata was turning to scraps the longer she used her ability, “Stop,” he said into her ear, “This isn’t you, this isn’t my sweet girl - you gotta stop.” He didn’t want to knock her out but he also didn’t want her getting tephrosis.

He was hugging her too tightly for her to finish her attack and instead she increased the heat around her to force him to let go; the buildings on fire nearby lit up more violently than before. “Let me go! They were going to kill you! They were going to poison your food! They didn’t care that they’d kill Konro and the girls too!”

“And you’re gonna burn down the town to punish two cowards.” He felt her stiffen and then her body relaxed against him, the air around her began to cool rapidly and the fires on the buildings began to shrink. “We’re safe, you kept us safe but this is enough.”

“B-Beni…” The man didn’t say anything as she hid her face in his neck and clutched at his coat, “I’m sorry, I… I just- I can’t lose-!”

“I know,” He murmured. Earlier he had wished she would get angry more often but not like this. Not to the point of destroying property and losing her mind, “It’s done… leave the destroying to me from now on.”

“I’m sorry…” She whispered, “I thought I was better than this.” Y/N really thought she had a handle on her anger; it had been years since she had reacted like this. She had lost her family as a child, her mother had infernalised and killed her father before she could be put to rest. Y/N had been angry afterwards, hating that people could burst into flames, hating that the Hikeshi couldn’t get there in time to save what she had left; when her ability came in she could hardly control it and caused fires whenever she got angry. It had taken nearly killing another family to make her stop and change.

To start forgiving people and letting things slide. “D-did I hurt anyone?”

“No one important.” Benimaru picked her up into his arms and turned his head to catch Konro’s gaze, “They were gonna poison us, I’ll leave them to you, Konro.” The Lieutenant nodded and Benimaru headed inside to look after Y/N.

The twins ran after the couple to help, grabbing Benimaru’s clothing whilst occasionally glancing back, Asakusa didn’t treat traitors well and the hearing how they planned to use poison didn’t go down particularly well. “Konro looks real mad.” Hinata giggled.

“They shouldn’t have made Y/N angry first.”

[sunlight-moonrise]

The Price (Reid Imagine)

Summary: Reader is a technical analyst for the BAU. She did not expect to be smitten by the resident genius. 

A/N: This is my first time writing a fic as well as my first time writing smut. I’d like to thank @spencer-reid-in-a-pool​ for beta reading my work (you’re a gem and I’ll fight for you). Also a quick thank you to @imagining-in-the-margins​ and those in the discord for being so welcoming and helping me with this. The fic is inspired by @erin-bo-berin​ Sweet Cheeks. 

Category: Fluff and Smut

Content Warnings: Oral (female receiving), fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, rough sex

Word Count: 6.0K

Masterlist

There are a lot of things I enjoy about this job. The salary is decent. My coworkers are pretty cool. I get to interact with a sexy genius from time to time- you know, the usual that comes with being employed by the government.

I started as a technical analyst for the BAU a few months prior, working alongside the one and only Penelope Garcia with assisting the rest of the team behind some computer screens. Coding and hacking is second nature to me so the job is not too difficult. It was either this or facing some years in jail because I couldn’t cover my tracks fast enough. Looking at mangled and mutilated bodies on a weekly basis is better than prison.

I get along rather well with the team. I pretty much call everyone by a term of endearment, much to Garcia’s delight. It was one of the things we had in common and helped us get along with one another much faster. I sometimes can get carried away with the innuendos, but Garcia welcomes everything I say with open arms.

I typically save my more sensual remarks for the doctor. I remember the good old days when he used to be so tongue-tied by my actions. Now my words barely surprises him.

A voice broke my concentration. “What got you thinking so hard, angel?” I turn towards the person, a smile already adorning my face. Lo and behold, Dr. Spencer Reid has graced me with his delectable presence.

“Would you believe me if I said that I was thinking of you Doc?” He had a small smile on his face. I could pretty much categorize all the smiles he uses because of how often I stare at him. I mean, it is a tragedy to not stare at such beauty. This particular smile means that he is content and comfortable.

“May I ask exactly what it was that you were thinking about?” he asked. 

“I cannot share the sordid details of my mind with you just yet darling. You’ll just have to use that beautiful mind of yours and conjure up something imaginative.”

He let out a small laugh and helped me carry the files I was juggling. My eyes immediately went to his hands. The things I’ll let those hands do to me. I bet only one is needed to perfectly wrap around my -- No bitch, focus. We got a case to present in five minutes. Right, right. Work now, daydream later.

We entered the conference room, where the rest of the team was already sitting at the round table, waiting for us. I gave out the files with Spencer’s help while Penelope started up the monitor.

“You guys are staying local but time is of the essence” she informed us. The TV lit up with four pictures of young boys. “We have a kidnapping case at Stafford County.”

“Were they kidnapped at the same time or place?” asked JJ as she skimmed over the report I handed out earlier.

“No” I said as I pointed to the two younger boys on the screen. “Jacob Rivers and David Hall were taken from their respective homes 48 hours ago” I then pointed to the two slightly older boys “Benjamin Harris was taken 12 hours ago at a park and Scott Turner was taken from the mall less than 6 hours ago.”

“Do these boys have anything in common?” Morgan asked out loud.

“Other than physical appearance and age group, these boys don’t have any similarities. They didn’t even go to the same school. As a matter of fact, David Hall was home-schooled.” replied Garcia.

“Garcia and I couldn’t find any common ground in the families’ educational, economic, or social backgrounds either” I added. “Once you guys take off, we’ll do a further dive into their personal histories.”

“The UnSub is already escalating, kidnapping from a private home and kidnapping from a crowded area within hours of each event is fairly drastic” Rossi stated.

“Maybe the Unsub is on a time frame? They could be feeling pressured and desperate” Emily questioned, trying to come up with some kind of initial profile.

Hotch already started standing up. “We’ll know more after analyzing the crime scenes and talking to local PD. Let’s head out.” The rest of the team followed, gathering their files and making an exit towards the door while Garcia headed for our office. Spencer lagged behind a bit and I already knew why. We have a little tradition of bidding farewell to one another before he takes off for a case.

I stood next to him, bumping my shoulder against his upper arm. “Don’t miss me too much while you are out there.”

“The more you remind me I have to leave, the more I want to stay here.” he grinned.

I snorted at his words, knowing that he was full of shit. There is nothing more that Reid loves than being out in the field. “Go be a hero and come back to me in one piece pretty boy.”

“Yes Ma’am.” he replied as he went to follow the team towards the elevator.

I swear that boy is immune to my teasing now. I miss seeing his face become flush, but I also enjoy the playful repartee we have now. I remember the first interaction I had with Spencer quite vividly. It truly was a comical moment.

 “Everyone this is (Y/N) (Y/L/N). She will be working alongside Garcia.” Hotch stated as he introduced me to the team. I have already met him and Penelope prior to being presented to everyone else.

“Derek Morgan, pleasure to meet you.” Whoa. If tall, dark, and handsome was a person, Morgan would be fit for the role. He offered his hand, which I immediately took.

“The pleasure is all mine” I replied with a wide smile.

I directed my attention to a much older gentleman. “David Rossi” said the Italian man who reminded me of a mob boss.

“Charmed to meet you.” I shook his hand, surprised by the strength behind it. Those older bones are still working for him.

Next came the petite blonde, whose figure I was both envious and enamored with. “Jennifer Jareau, but everyone here calls me JJ for short.”

“In that case, please call me (Y/N/N).” I shook her hand, and became even more envious with how soft her skin was. She has got to tell me her secrets.

I focused on the brunette with shoulder-length hair. “Emily Prentiss”. My God, I think being attractive is a requirement for this team. She offered her hand to shake and her grip was firm. Note to self, forget about Rossi; don’t get on Emily’s bad side.

“Nice to meet you.”

I turned to the final individual and was blown away by his beauty. Yup, my previous thought has been confirmed. Only good-looking people are allowed pass these doors. His bone structure looked like it was sculpted by Roman artists. His body was lean and slender, reminding me of a runner’s physique. My eyes stared up to the softest hazel eyes I have ever seen.

“Dr. Spencer Reid.” he introduced. I offered my hand immediately, wanting to feel his skin against mine.

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N), but you already knew that,” I said softly, my hand still out. He just stared at it as if it was an anomaly.

“Uh-the amount of pathogens passed through a handshake is astounding. A high five transmit half the number. But even then, a kiss is much more safe.” he quickly stated as he nodded his head. I almost didn’t catch any of it. Partially because of the rapid speech, partially because I was staring at his lips.

“Hmm, that’s news to me. However, if a kiss is what you want…” I lowered my hand and took a step closer to him. My eyes slowly moved from his eyes to his mouth and then back up. He took a slight step back.

“N-N-No, that’s not—I-I mean that —uhh...” His face was flushed and his tongue shot out to run against his lips. His eyes quickly darted across the room, seeking some help. I felt a sense of pride knowing I made this man flustered.

“I’m just teasing Doc.” If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he was frightened by me. Maybe he was, but the blush on his face and the way he kept staring gave me further information on him.

“Don’t mind Reid,” Morgan said, coming to the young man’s rescue. “He has a thing with germs.” He finished, a smirk plastered on his face. Well, I hope he soon develops a thing for something else. Or rather someone else.  

I was just about to make another sly comment when Hotch interrupted. “Back to the case at hand.” He gave us all a pointed look. Right, I am at my first day at work. I’ll focus on hot doctors with hotter smiles and the hottest face at my own time.

“Yes sir,” Garcia stated, as she started pushing buttons on a remote. The TV turned on and pictures of three different women showed up on the screen. They all looked to be strangled to death. “You guys are needed in Toledo, Ohio.” Garcia goes on to describe the case while the team starts the early stages of conducting a profile.

“Wheels up in 30.” Hotch says and the everyone disperses. Garcia walked up to me and handed me some documents from the case file.

“C’mon cupcake, we gotta do some preliminary work to get the case going much faster.” I followed her to what she called the “bat cave”. I scanned the small room and immediately fell in love. Computers and monitors littered almost every inch of the place. I saw a lot of colorful knickknacks displayed on one side of the desk, knowing already who they belonged to. The area was endearing and had a cozy feel to it.

“Wow, you weren’t kidding. This place is a dream come true.” I am sure she can hear the awe in my voice.

“I know, right. Wait until you actually use it girlie, the framework on these things is out of this world.” I sat myself on a chair nearby and rolled in front of a screen.

“Alrighty. You can do some background checks on these girls while I gather more information from the police reports. Let me know if there are any commonalities among any of them. We’ll relay that info with the team.”

“Gotcha babe, I’ll have the information ready ASAP.” I responded, already typing away on the computer. I’m already starting to like it here.

*Later that day*

Garcia and I haven’t found much in common between the victims of the crimes, much to our dismay. I was left in the office to continue searching for important information on the girls while she went to fax some data to the precinct when the phone started to ring.

I quickly answered and put it on speaker. “(Y/L/N) at your humble service. How may I serve you?”

“Oh-uh is Garcia around” replied a high-pitched voice, which I immediately recognized as Reid. I don’t know whether or not I should be insulted that he wanted Penelope or pleased that I probably still have him flustered.

“She’s a bit pre-occupied at the moment. But rest assured I can find whatever you need Doc. Especially if you ask nicely.”

“Uh-I need you to pull up information on the mothers. We think they were all in the same sorority, however not necessarily at the same time. We need a list of all the members of the sorority from the time the mothers joined with a 3-year pre- and post-graduation.”

“No problemo sweetness. Anything else I can do for you? I have a lot of other services that can be helpful.” I stated, a teasing tone in my voice as I already set up my search.

“No-no, that’s all. Um thanks.” I can already picture the blush coating his cheeks as he stammered his response.

“Alright love, call me back if you need anything. Or if you change your mind.” I hung up the phone and started organizing the list in front of me.

 And from then on, I have enjoyed pretty much all the moments I had with the BAU. It took some time, but Spencer now has accepted and even returned my little flirtations.  We often get compared to Garcia and Morgan. But with a lot more sexual tension, at least on my end. I have to remind myself from time to time to calm down before I combust in the middle of a conference room or the bullpen. C'est la vie.

I made my way to the cavern of all things amazing and settled in front of my computers. Pen looked at me with a knowing expression on her face. “You’re gloomy.”

I pouted as I put my earpiece on. “I am not gloomy, I am horny,” I rebuked.

“How long has it been since you got some?”

“I’m not sure but it feels like I have not gotten any since the Stone Age,” I groaned out.

“I don’t know why you don’t just tell him how you feel,” she pointed her pink glittery pen in my direction, “I bet he would fuck you right here if you let him.”

And there goes my thought process, as always, overtaken by Spencer Reid. “Babe, please. This is not helping my situation.”

“Just telling you how it is.”

●●●

We have been sitting in front of these screens for hours. The team has made some progress but they’re missing an important piece to fit the puzzle. Garcia has been looking into the background of the neighbors when I heard a small stomach grumble coming from her direction. I let out a laugh as she huffed out “I am going to grab a snack from the breakroom, you want anything boo?”

“If it ain’t alcohol or chocolate, I don’t want it.”

“Noted,” she said as she left the room. I really hope she finds a couple of cupcakes or something.

I continued trying to get information on these missing kids when my headpiece played the Doctor Who theme song, informing me that Einstein was calling in. “Goddess of knowledge and wisdom at your disposal.”

“I didn’t know I had Athena at my fingertips.” How is it possible that nine words have short-circuited my brain just now? Is it the voice or the way he basically called me a Greek Deity? Probably both.

Of course I slyly responded, “Oh my Hephaestus, you have all of me at your fingertips.” I heard a chuckle and I immediately knew it belonged to Morgan. A slight blush crept onto my cheeks when I heard a random voice asking why Spencer called his girlfriend in the middle of a case.

“I should have mentioned that you were on speakerphone.”

“Naughty boy, you know I charge extra for groups.” Now this was followed by some choked out noises and a bunch of giggles. I could only assume the whole precinct was amused by my antics at this point. 

“Can you ever forgive me?”

“I can, for a price.”

“A price?”

“Yes, a price that I would inform you of in private. Now the reason for your call…” I drew out. Thank goodness Garcia wasn’t here. I don’t need her looking at me as if I am a phone sex operator.

“I need you to check foster children between the ages of four and eight within a 25-mile radius. We are looking for a homosexual couple that were looking to adopt but were rejected. The names should be on multiple applications among different sites. Let me know what you find.”

“I’ll have that information at the palm of your hands soon” Meanwhile, I am over here wishing that I was at the palm of his hands.

“Thank you, my Goddess” I can’t help but smile when he says things like this. Since when were the roles reversed in our friendship?

“Anything for a gorgeous worshipper. TTYL.”

Garcia chose that moment to walk back in while I had this silly grin on my face. She stared at me and I already knew what she was going to say.

“If you don’t have a piece of chocolate or a cocktail on you, I am not talking.”

All she did was laugh at me.

●●●

The team was able to find all four boys safely. The UnSubs were a male couple who wanted to adopt but kept facing discrimination against the agencies. It is a shame that they felt they had to resort to kidnapping in order to have a family.

Now Garcia and I are scanning the notes the team faxed to us earlier today. They informed us that they would be back here in half an hour or so.

“Shoot, I didn’t think it would take this long to scan these damn files.” Garcia murmured.  I looked over at her and saw a small stack of documents that still needed to be put into the system.

I walked over and grabbed the pile from her. “Go, I’ll take care of it from here doll.”

“Are you sure? I feel bad. You did your portion of the work already.”

“Don’t you have to be at the rehearsal in 20 minutes? How is the theater going to operate without their main lead?” I placed the documents on my side of the desk and moved to gather Garcia’s belongings.  I picked up her purse and jacket before handing it to her, quickly pushing her towards the door. “I got this, think of it as an IOU.”

“Yes, yes, yes, I owe you big. Thank you sugar, see you tomorrow.” Garcia hurriedly exited the door and headed towards the elevator. 

I looked towards the papers, a low groan leaving my mouth. The faster I go through this, the better.

●●●

I was just finished implementing all the documents into the computer when I heard a knock at the door. I turned around and saw Spencer’s head peeking through. “Evening handsome, to what do I owe this visit?”

“Garcia passed by me a while ago and informed me you were in here finishing some extra work. I wanted to check on you; see if you needed my help.”

“Thanks Doc, but you’re a few minutes too late. I already finished scanning the files. Besides, you’re not the best with technology, much less these computers.”

“Maybe not. But I am a fast learner and I pay close attention to detail.” Either my ears were playing a trick on me or Spencer’s voice lowered an octave or two.

I remembered what Penelope said earlier today and decided to just go for it. “I could collect on that price from earlier.” I leaned against the desk and stared into his eyes. C’mon Doc, pick up the hint. Rather, pick me up instead.

“Well I was thinking that I can get you dinner.” he said, a hint of excitement in his voice.

That’s great, but not what I had in mind. “I was hoping for something else” I looked into his eyes, then slowly trailed my eyes downwards. Kiss me. Kiss me. Touch me. Lick me. Fuck me. Kiss me.

Unfortunately, Spencer is not a mind reader. He lowered his head and looked slightly dejected. “Oh well umm—would you prefer to go to a theater?” Oh Doc, you sexy, naïve, intelligent, innocent man. I guess if you want something you have to do it yourself.

I sat on the edge of my desk. “Come here Spencer.”

His head perked up, slightly intrigued since I rarely call him by his name. He walked to where I was sitting but there was still space between us.

“Closer, I don’t bite.” Unless you want me to.

He moved closer to me and I was able to rest my hands on his shoulders. Thankfully the height of the table let us be more at level with one another.

I made sure to look into his eyes as I said “I am going to kiss you. If that isn’t something you want, tell me now.”

He was speechless. His mouth was moving but no sounds came out. If the circumstances were different I would have appreciated seeing his rattled expression once more. I waited a few seconds, but he still has yet to say anything.

“Spen-mmh” before I knew it, his mouth was upon mine. He gently cradled my face as his lips moved against my own. My eyes closed as I felt nothing but bliss. As cliché as it sounds, I was in paradise because of this kiss alone.

His tongue peeked and swiped against my lower lip, trying to have a taste of me. I was more than happy to grant him entrance, a moan leaving my body as his tongue touched mine.

All parts of me were trying to feel him. I had one hand in his hair while the other grabbed onto the back of his shirt. My chest was pressed against his while my legs lazily wrapped around his midsection. His scent was intoxicating to me. It was a coffee-like smell as if he just walked out of a café. He tasted so sweet, all I wanted to do was keep his mouth on mine. But my body needed air so I slowly pulled away.

He tried to catch his breath as his forehead rested against mine. “So you don’t want dinner?”

“Doc the only thing I am hungry for right now is you. We’ll get food afterward, alright?” Spencer nodded his head while licking his lips. My eyes hungrily followed the action and I just had to get another taste. I pulled him towards me, his hands once again holding onto my face. He was much more dominant with this kiss, and I was more than willing to give him the control. His hands then trailed down to my hips and pulled me closer to his pelvis. I jerked against him and was rewarded with a groan.

He squeezed me tighter as his lips broke away from mine once more. He placed a peck on my lips, then my cheek before trailing down my neck. I felt my body heat up as I released a small moan. Fucking hell, he is going to be the death of me and we barely did anything.

Spencer started to lightly nibble on my neck when I pulled him back by his hair. “It is summer and I am not wearing a turtleneck in 80° weather. If you’re gonna give me some hickeys, they better be on my chest.” He murmured something that I couldn’t quite comprehend before undoing the buttons of my blouse.

Hell, I am not the only one who is gonna be undressed so I started unbuttoning his dress shirt as well. It was a race to see who would get the other’s shirt off first. Of course I lost because my hands wouldn’t stop shaking. But when his warm lips kissed their way towards the middle of my cleavage, I felt like a fucking champion.

I tried my best to shimmy out of the sleeves of my blouse while Spencer attempted to take my bra off, his lips still leaving a love mark against my chest. Once we got rid of the shirt and the bra, his mouth immediately enveloped one of my nipples.

“Fuck” I yelped loudly, “a little warning next time Doc.”

“Sorry” he muttered as he continued to suck on my breast while palming the other between his dexterous fingers. That had to be the most insincere apology I have ever heard from him. An idea came across my head. I slowly removed his shirt, watching it pool on the floor. I then raked the nails of one hand across his chest while the other pulled against his hair. Hard. He retaliated by lightly biting my nipple. Fuck, the plan backfired. Abort mission, abort the damn mission.

Spencer let out a small chuckle as he pulled away from my breast, an audible pop leaving his mouth. My hands went to his face and I moved him up to look at me. His eyes were dilated and his mouth was swollen. His face was flush and he was taking deeper breaths than usual. He looked so beautiful like this.

He had a dorky smile on his face and I realized that I said the words out loud. I felt my face heat up fast and he swiftly commented “I’d never thought I’d see you be so thrown off because of me.”

He rested his hands against either side of the desk and just looked at me. “Shut up and kiss me.” I hissed, already missing the warmth of his skin against mine.

“Where do you want me to kiss you?” he asked. I was about to reply when he interrupted “Do you want me to kiss you on your lips? Or maybe you want me back on those beautiful breasts of yours?”

Have mercy on me, I never believed Spencer Reid could make me so wet just with his words. Sure, I thought of it, but I didn’t believe it would happen to me.

“Maybe you want me to go lower. Should I place my lips on that pussy of yours?” Oh my fuck, I never want this moment to end. I nodded my head so quickly, I could have sworn I given myself whiplash.

“I want to hear you say it,” he breathed out.

“Yes, yes, please. I want you to eat my pussy. Please.” I begged. Dignity be damned.

“That’s my good girl” How is it possible that he went from the dorky adorable doctor to this assertive, stimulating specimen in a matter of minutes? I didn’t think he had a sensual bone in his body. But I am glad to be proven wrong.

Spencer lowered himself to his knees while I clumsily attempted to rid myself of my skirt and panties. I lifted my lower body up as he pulled the clothing off of me. Penelope would have a field day if she knew that I was sitting butt naked on the desk with Spencer Reid between my legs. Hell, I am having a field day knowing this.

Spencer, being the teasing bastard that he has been for the past few minutes, started kissing my legs first. “That’s not where I said I wanted you to kiss me” I huffed out.

“Hush” was all he said as he continued the slow trail up, making sure to alternate between each leg. I was already breathing as if I have ran a marathon, my patience was waning at this point. Finally, he made his way to where I needed him most. He put his hands on my thighs and pushed them further apart.

My hands landed on top of his head, playing with the curls. “You’re comfortable down there Doc?” I snickered, loving the sight of his head between my legs. All he did was nip my inner thigh harshly. I shrieked at the action. I’m starting to think this man has a tiny biting fetish.

I wasn’t ready for when his tongue parted my folds. I squeaked as he teasingly lapped the arousal that had formed the second he walked into the room. I tried rolling my hips but his hands made me stay put on the desk. I never knew he could hold me down like this. I couldn’t even be mad because the pleasure he was giving me was incredible.

Spencer continued to tease me, his tongue never going where I needed it most. He made sure to explore as much as possible as leisurely as possible. “Spencer, please” I cried out. He let out a small hum, the vibration causing a shiver to rack my body.  

His tongue finally entered me, much to my delight. No amount of imagination could have ever prepared me for the things this appendage can do to me. He continued this soft, flat movement that was driving me crazy. My hands tightened in his hair, hoping he would go a bit faster.

“You taste so good princess, I don’t want this to end.”

“That’s my Queen to you” I jested. He didn’t like that since he responded with a resounding smack against my outer thigh. Ouch, note to self, Spencer doesn’t like being teased during sexy times. Hmm. On second thought, continue to tease Spencer during sexy times.

I felt his finger probe my entrance, moving up and down before pushing inside of me. I let out a distressing whine as he started slowly moving his finger in and out of me, curling as he did so. His mouth was on my clit, sucking and kissing it as if he has done so all his life.

My body started heating up and trembling. I tried, and failed, to roll my hips against the movement. “Spe-Spencer” I wailed. He didn’t relent.

Spencer entered a second finger into me as his tongue gave small, flickering motions against my bundle of nerves. I had to move one hand to my mouth to prevent any loud noises from being heard outside the room. Shit, did we even lock the door?

That thought immediately left my mind as my core started to tighten. Spencer must have known that I was getting close to my orgasm because he moved his fingers more diligently within me. I felt his fingers curl as they pulled out, I felt his tongue lick thoroughly against my pearl, I felt my ecstasy rising within me. It took one more deep press of his fingers and a harsh suck for me to come all over his face. I bit down on my fingers as I moaned out loud.

“That was so much better then what I imagined” I panted out, the words barely coming out comprehensible. I had a giant smile decorating my face.

He pulled his face up, a smug grin gracing his face. “Is this what you were thinking about earlier this morning?” he taunted. I couldn’t even give him a smartass remark because I was too busy trying to come back to reality. He pulled his fingers out and held them in front of my face.

“Open” he ordered. I complied and he pushed his fingers inside of my mouth. “You look so pretty when you follow instructions well. See how good you taste.”

I pulled my head back, taking his fingers out of my mouth. “I bet I taste a lot better on that tongue of yours.”

He tangled his hand in my hair and pulled me to a kiss. I immediately opened and welcomed his tongue against mine. I was right, I do taste better on him. I let out a deep moan and pulled away far enough to gently bite down on his lower lip.

He looks at me, that devilish tongue of his running against his lower lip before entering my mouth once again. With his lips still on mine, he picked me up and move to sit on my desk chair. It was nothing short of a miracle that we managed not to fall on the floor.

I placed my hand on top of his erection through his slacks and he drew a quick intake of breath. I started palming him as I grinded myself against him. I pulled back as I whispered, “I need you, Spencer”.

“Y’know this is the most I have heard you call me by my name in any given moment we have been together.” He unzipped his slacks and pushed down his pants and boxers as much as he could with me on top of him.

I looked down, finally being able to see his cock. Is it possible to get aroused further through sight alone? Because I think I creamed myself again. God, I wish I could show him my oral skills, but we’ll save that for another time.

“Would you rather I call you by something else?” I asked, attempting to move my lower body so that it can align with his cock. I say attempt because Spencer currently had his hands on my thighs again.

“No, I like the way my name sounds as you moan it out. Don’t hide your pleasure from me this time.” He maneuvered my legs to rest upon the armrest on either side of the chair, leaving my pussy wide open for him.

I gave him an incredulous look. “Are you forgetting that we are at work?”

He started rubbing the tip of his cock against my lower lips. “I didn’t forget. I just don’t fucking care.” And with that, he slowly penetrated me.

We both groaned at the intrusion. He gradually started entering me as I adjusted to his size. Inch by inch, he gave me all of him until he was buried to the hilt.  I took a moment to savor the feel of Spencer inside of me before I started grinding against him. He took that as a hint to begin thrusting.

He started slow, taking his time and having us enjoy the feeling of one another. “Your cunt is so fucking tight” he hissed into my ear and I gave out a loud whine.

“That’s because you have such a big cock, Doc” I managed to moan out. He smacked my ass before grabbing each cheek tightly in his hands. “I want you to call me by my name” he grits out.

“Spencer, baby please give it to me. I’ve been waiting for this Spencer, I’ve been waiting for you.” He started kissing my neck once more and my eyes started to closed. I wanted to focus on the pleasure he was giving me.

He tightly grabbed me, moving my hips along with his thrusts. I was close to being pushed over the edge once more. The only sounds occupying the room were our moans and skin smacking against skin as we chased our pleasure.

“Open your mouth” I heard him say. I opened my eyes to see his thumb positioned over my lips. I let out a small whimper as I sucked his digit earnestly. I made sure to coat his finger with a lot of saliva, knowing exactly what he was going to do with it when it was out of my mouth.

He pulled his thumb out and immediately placed it on my clit. I gave out an embarrassingly loud sob as he started moving his finger against me in soft circular motions. I placed my lips on his neck, trying to muffle the noise coming out of my throat.

Spencer quickly grabbed my hair and pulled my head away as he started to slow down. “How many times do I have to tell you that I want to hear your pleasure?” In that moment, Spencer controlled my mind, body, and soul.

“I’m sorry Spencer. I’ll be your good girl, please don’t stop.” He returned back to the previous pace and thrust into me even harder. We both started chasing our orgasms, not being able to hold back any longer. He was pounding into me relentlessly and I was loving it. I am sure that I am going to be sore after this.

“Come for me (Y/N), I want to feel this tight cunt squeeze around my cock.” Say less, I am already ahead of you. My eyes were rolling to the back of my head and I felt my pussy pulsate around him. With one last motion against his thumb, I cried out his name multiple times as I climaxed.  

Spencer whispered my name as he continued pushing into me, chasing his own orgasm. He thrust a couple more times before quickly pulling out, spilling himself over my stomach. I panted as I laid my head against the crook of his neck. His fingers thrummed a slow rhythm upon my lower back.

“So about that dinner... do you want to get Indian food?”

“Yeah, I can go for some samosas right now.”

[forever-lynx]

you’re beautiful, scars and all

asheiji fic bc yeah<3

word count: 1170

warnings: past trauma mention, past abuse mention, scars, wounds, burn marks. also sexual innuendo but nothing happens lol ash is just a little shit

A/N: i havent written a fic in ages so fingers crossed y’all like this. you can also read it on ao3 here

— — —

It was the hottest night of the year and Ash was refusing to take his shirt off.

Eiji knew Ash was insecure of what was beneath his shirt, but he could not take any second longer of the white boy’s complaints.

“It’s too fucking hot,” Ash groaned.

“So you’ve been telling me for the past hour,” Eiji huffed in annoyance. “Just get in bed, standing out on the balcony will only make it worse.” “I am patiently waiting for the breeze. Besides, I thought you would have liked the view,” Ash turned to Eiji and gave him a mischievous wink. Eiji groaned.

“Yeah, your sweaty ass is a sight to see,” he replied with sarcasm dripping his words.

Ash scoffed, “You’re just jealous.”

“No, I’m annoyed because my-oh-so-dear-boyfriend won’t join me in our bed.”

“Why, got something naughty planned for us?” Ash winked again, closing the balcony door and sitting beside Eiji.

Eiji playfully slapped his boyfriend’s arm, “No! Oh my God, you really are the Devil.” He joked.

Ash hummed, “And you had the guts to fall in love with him.”

Eiji smiled and took Ash’s hand in his, “I had the pleasure of falling in love with him.” He corrected.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while as Eiji rubbed his thumb along Ash’s hand. He could feel the heat radiating off his boyfriend; Ash was wearing long sleeves, after all. Eiji sighed, wishing their A/C was working so that their apartment wasn’t so warm. They had called the A/C repair contractor but the man happened to be new at the job and did more damage than good. Now, the two young adults had to buy a new A/C which would cost them a fortune.

“It’s hot,” Ash mumbled.

Eiji sighed, “You could take your shirt off…”

“What are you planning, ya nasty?” Eiji playfully slapped his boyfriend’s arm again. “Not like that! Get your mind out of the gutter!”

Ash giggled, his face falling a moment later. “I would take it off if the sight wasn’t so horrendous.” 

Eiji frowned. “Don’t say that.” Eiji did not know the whole story, but he did know that Ash’s former circumstances were… not sugarcoating it, absolute hell. He had been through physical, mental and psychological abuse. No wonder why Ash wore long sleeves and refused to take off his shirt; he did not like the sight of his body because it reminded him of his past. Eiji winced at the insensitivity of his words from a moment ago.

“I apologize, I didn’t mean to upset you. I was just offering a choice. I should have chosen my words more carefully.”

Ash shook his head, “I know you meant no harm, Eiji. You Japanese really do apologize for everything,” He scratched the back of his neck. “Though, I guess I can’t run away from the past no matter how much I want to. I cover myself with anything I can find but deep down I know it doesn’t truly help my case.”

“You don’t have to if it makes you uncomfortable.” Eiji assured him.

Ash shook his head, “No, it’s okay. Sometimes in life you gotta fast the past that haunts you, no matter how cruel it is.” Ash paused. “Besides, I trust you.” He added with a whisper. 

Eiji nodded, giving his boyfriend encouragement. Ash took his shirt off slowly, still unsure if this is a good idea. He finally threw it to the floor when it came off. With his bare chest and wounds exposed, Ash felt self-conscious of the sight in front of Eiji. He looked away, gazing at his shirt that was thrown to the floor. His hand was trembling, afraid of the ghosts of his past. Ash knew facing his past would help him overcome it but it wasn’t easy. However, what was done was done. There was no going back now.

Ash could feel Eiji’s hand in his and felt comforted. He was grateful for his boyfriend’s presence, though now he was afraid Eiji would sneer at him and his face would contort into disgust. Rationally, Ash knew this would not happen–Eiji had the kindest soul, he had the heart of an angel, not a bone in his body was made out of evil–but his anxiety coursed through his veins, taunting him, mocking him. The silence from his boyfriend was deafening.

Eiji on the other hand, was taking it all in. There was a huge scar that grazed Ash's chest. Bruises were to be found by everyone including several burn marks. His arms were filled with cuts of all sizes and old scars. Eiji’s eyes began to fill with tears but he bit them back; he would not be the one crying at Ash’s moment of vulnerability.

Eiji wanted to hold Ash, to let him know that none of this would happen again, that his old life was behind him. Unfortunately he knew that words had minimal effect; Ash needed to be healed with love and care, needed to experience peace and learn that touch could be good. Eiji yearned for Ash, wanted to reach out to him but his boyfriend felt so far away.

“Disgusting, isn’t it?” Ash mused. “It’s fine, you don’t need to say anything.”

Eiji’s look hardened. Who had taught Ash to fear being vulnerable? Who taught him that scars were not ugly? Who taught him that he was weak for surviving the worst years of his life?

“May I touch?” Eiji asked.

Startled, Ash nodded.

Eiji slowly took his hands around Ash’s chest. His hands traveled from wound to wound, burn mark to burn mark. He let all his love seep into his hands; perhaps Ash would be able to feel Eiji’s love and think differently. Perhaps it would help Ash heal, even just a little.

Ash felt Eiji’s warm hands discover every area of his chest. He felt him touch every wound, every nasty scar of his. He felt so, so vulnerable under his chest. Ash felt like giving in; he was so tired from having to carry all this weight on his chest. Slowly but surely, he realized that Eiji was trying to help him; he was letting him know he could rely on Eiji, that he could share his burden with him. This revelation brought tears to Ash’s eyes. He did not deserve someone as gentle and kind as Eiji. 

“You’re beautiful,” Eiji said. His voice was firm, as though he was stating a fact. “You’re beautiful, scars and all.” He repeated.

Ash blinked back tears. He did not have the strength to fight back. Eiji wiped the tears that were streaming down the blond’s face. 

“Want me to hold you?” He asked. Ash nodded.

And so the couple got in bed with the covers thrown off–it was the hottest night, after all. Ash had his face buried in the crook of Eiji’s neck as he gently held Ash. He would occasionally rub his boyfriend’s back, soothing him to sleep.

[shinygoku]

feeling quite self-indulgent today, so am sniffing around to ask if you've had any further edward thoughts? now that you've had a whole extra month down the ttte rabbithole y'know ;)

The lovely lad himself! 💙🚂✨

Always gonna take the chance to Admire this Hodges pic of him <3

As for my thoughts...

...my thoughts haven't really deviated from last month! He's just such a swell, lovable guy!! Though I will say some'a my Takes have actually Intensified since last time so I'll jump in the deep end here and talk about what is probably the hottest and most controversial.

I don't see Edward as an Old Dude!

If anything, I do, in fact, see him as one of the Younger (adult) ones!

i.e. my gijinka of Thomas is hard to definitively age, but I was aiming for early 20's. Like, young enough that I still would look at him irl and be all "Son Boy" but old enough to plausibly have the jobs he would have as a human railway worker type of guy.

I still wanna draw how I'd see Edward ^^; but the notion of him being like, 16 years or so older than Thomas feels perfect somehow. So his design would reflect that assuming I could translate the ideas to lines well enough psshshh

I know Edward is based on an old 19th Century Design. But I'm sitting here in 2021 and if Thomas is an E2 then he's 106. Literal ages aren't a factor in this! Steam Engines are sadly a relic of the past, every single character is old and out of date irl.

"But CatCat," says someone who isn't you, Jobey, "The Railway series was first written in like the 40's and the relative ages made more sense back then, also the earliest stories were Set before they were written!"

Still not really holding water! The ages have consistently been tied to how they behave, how they feel. Sometimes they age across many books but for the most part they seem to be in a temporal stasis when Gordon will always Act older than Thomas in spite of being younger as the Proto-A1 compared to that mini E2. Percy is diagnosed with Baby but is older than all the main cast sans Edward himself! Age Shmage, the numbers these Locomotives care about are what's painted on their sides!

I can understand why some people want to lean into him as being the older, wiser, "ahh I've had a good time of it overall" mentor dude with silver hair and a big comfy armchair by the fireplace, from which he reads thick tomes and drinks tea with a saucer held beneath. And that's great! Everyone is free to have their own take and this is a good archetype that deserves some Love~ 💖

Contrarywise, I see certain people get ridiculously precious about it. "urgh whenever I see Edward looking in his 20's I die inside" type of comments only fill my emergency Spite Gauge, which can give me quite the burst of energy when my preferred interest fuel runs out!

But anyway, I've made up my mind on how I see Edward, and a lot of that is thanks to based Season 1 and how very Boyish he is in the early character building eps.

This is the face of a young man with a quiet impish steak!!

But also, crucially, Edward can still be that mentor figure while not being a wizened Gandalf looking pocket watch in waistcoat wearing old geezer! He can still have several Sons when he's not even 20 years older than any of them!

He has both a Dad and Mentor's Energy, but not an Old Man's. The latter goes to, again Gordon and also Toby (when he's not actively stirring shit at Ffarquhar anyway lol).

What Edward says in canon, one single time, is that he's "Too old to pull a Royal Train". This isn't an indication that he's literally old, but that his make isn't sufficiently flashy and powerful for a visit that's given so much importance.

The other thing that comes up is like "People tell me I'm old fashioned, but I don't care!" ...which is self explanatory! He's told he's old fashioned, not old old! That he's told such because it's not something he himself really thinks about. And that he doesn't put any of his worth to this!

Finally, I guess I gotta debunk things like his creaking in stories like Cows and Old Iron, and Exploit. His basis is what's old about him, not his self. He's also a tremendously hard worker, but humans and engines alike do get worn out through a lot of exertion. He's lucky that whole body parts could be switched out as soon as funds and time are cleared! Ain't these stories set after WW2? So he'd have been On the entire time! Even the hottest new thing woulda been worn out halfway into All That! Exploit had him pull a train that was jam packed when he was originally built for speed over power, and the return journey stacks every element against him short of dropping a tornado on top, any of the engines woulda broke something in those conditions. The point of Exploit isn't that he was weak enough to break, but that he's strong enough to push through it.

...I think that's all the points I wanted to make...

THE TL;DR IS: He can still do the old person-y stuff! Still using a physical diary and reading yellow paged books and tinkering with old watches, listening to Bach and Mozart. He is old fashioned, he just don't let it stop him, baybee! He's a Dad and a wise, trusted, expericened mentor. And also a kindred spirit with Thomas who absolutely feels like a youthful cheeky lad.

And here, after I wrote all that out I tried to draw him again, and I finally got it close to my intentions! 😼✨

[robotslenderman]

Eternal Hearts Liveblog, pt 1

Special thanks to @missn11​, who is probably mortified their name is associated with this travesty of a post, for letting me get my filthy little hands on this piece of embarrassing VTM history.

Okay guys, time to do the thing that’s gonna get me cancelled by fifteen-year-olds in the year 2032:

I’m gonna liveblog Eternal Hearts.

I once promised myself I would never make a rape joke, but today I break that vow because even the rape scenes are (sometimes) just that fucking ridiculous that I had to make fun of them.

This book is just.

Guys.

It’s GLORIOUS.

In the first twenty-four pages alone we have:

A guy is confronted by a locked door, so he whips his dick out. Everyone else acts like this is completely normal.

A guy meeting Final Death because a politician sat on his face. RIP in pieces Noah.

A mortal setting herself on fire, waving her arms around and running at a bunch of vampires yelling “DIE, YOU BASTARDS!”

A guy using his dick as a key ring. (Yeah, it’s the locked door guy.)

Lucita given the Hallowe’en treatment, in that she’s covered with sewage -- but sexy!

Daddy kink on top of the Washington monument.

Only some of the above makes sense in context. Some of it is as baffling in context as it is out of context.

This is the funniest shit I’ve ever read. Nobody told me about this when I went in holy shit.

Time to open this sucker up!

Liveblog under the cut!

DEAD DOVE, DO NOT EAT, THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING. IF YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT ETERNAL HEARTS IS, DO NOT READ THIS LIVEBLOG, HOLY SHIT.

You’re in for a ride, and it’s the edgiest, unsexiest ride ever.

First thing I notice: Eternal Hearts is, in fact, written by a woman. Which may mean that if she wanted to scare the shit out of her female readers, she'd know exactly how to do it.

gulp.

(^ I wrote that back when I thought I was gonna traumatise myself by reading this. OH BOY)

Next bit, the rape book is opened by the following foreword:

What follows is an essay that basically boils down to "no! :D but we wrote it anyway!”

Partway through that is this quote:

We’ll come back to that quote later. Several times, I predict.

Aaaand we open straight into a gang rape scene! Oh joy. And there’s church spires, to make it extra edgy.

Oh but then they give her the Kiss so she enjoys it! Yay!

Oh.

She's a shovelhead.

They never mentioned THIS part of the Sabbat recruitment process.

and now she's underground and buried and being raped again? Somehow. Like somebody’s got their entire goddamn fist in there. While under six feet of dirt. I know someone’s got their entire damn fist in there because the Shovelhead’s thinking about how somebody got their entire goddamn fist in there.

(Yeah this is the bit I had to make jokes about because it was that fucking ridiculous. I started this out trying to be respectful. I failed. Miserably. I just can’t fucking do it this is too -- too -- Eternal Hearts-y.)

Like the author just turned to the other people in the credits page and pitched this idea: “guys. Hear me out. What do you think is scarier than being raped or being buried alive?”

“idk what?”

“being raped after being buried alive!”

“That’s a GREAT idea!”

(”Lucy didn’t even break the rules as much as I was willing to let her” Remember that quote? Thank god for that.)

Jean - for that is our poor Shovelhead's name, RIP - seems only mildly concerned about the rape. and the fact it’s still happening.

Like yeah, serious talk, putting my respectful hat on: to be fair, everyone responds to trauma differently. You know how I respond to trauma? I make jokes about it. Like I’m the kind of person to say “what are you gonna do, STAB ME?” for the lols when a guy is pointing a knife at me.

Okay, respectful hat back off, back to edgy humour.

Anyway she’s being fisted by somebody while also six feet underground, somehow, and daydreaming about the guy she’s stalking and about how she’s in love with him, hmm, maybe he had something to do with it? She’s not entirely sure.

(ETA: So an anonymous Discord friend was reading my liveblog and said this:

and I laughed so hard my dog actually pawed at me because she was worried.

Yeah, I’m going to hell, but at least I know I’m taking you guys with me.)

Anyway she starts digging her way out, and I guess she’s still being fisted while she’s digging her way out???? IDK they didn’t say it stopped??? Like that’s gotta make digging your way out difficult.

And then cut to Lucita!

Walking past a protest outside a sex shop. There’s a bunch of Christian protestors outside because they’re bored or something. We get straight back into rapiness with a Dominate:

Damn Lucita, if jizzing your own brains isn't the hottest image you can give a guy, I don't know how what is.

Lucita decides to snack instead of raping him, but does sexually assault him by taking his dick from his pants and leaving it in his hand when he’s unconscious.

Lucita walks into a meeting at a brothel. There are “slaves”. I’m not sure if they’re sex slaves or if they’re actually ghouls, but then again, this is Eternal Hearts so probably both.

She expects Pieterzoon to be there, but he's not. When the others start talking like he's missing, she is completely unconcerned and immediately starts talking as if she knows he's missing.

They move on. Pieterzoon has paid Lucita to assassinate Marcus Vitel. Good fucking luck with that one. Everyone at the meeting is trying to stop her from doing it. Lucita’s like “tough shit he’s already paid me bitch is gonna die”.

Also the Brujah woman present is apparently this scene’s titillation or something because the author loves to remind us about how tight her clothes are and how she's "seductively cuddling" people.

no fucking kidding

I like how the VTM universe goes out of its way to avoid using the terms “son” and “daughter” to avoid the Unfortunate Implications when people inevitably start fucking their Sires

and the author’s like "nah fuck that let’s daddy kink it up.”

Oh and he does it ON TOP OF THE WASHINGTON MONUMENT!! Like gang rape in a churchyard wasn’t edgy enough I guess.

the author can't go a paragraph without reminding us that sex exists and everyone is utterly sex crazed. The bit I blacked out above? That was Lucita daydreaming about hiring a prostitute. Like that’s not erotica, erotica is arousing, this is just voyeurism.

Lucita apparently hasn't yet noticed she's in a porno.

Somebody makes a joke about the Christian protestors gang raping the prostitutes outside. It’s a Ventrue. Of course it is.

Apparently the slave (I guess the word “ghoul” isn’t sexy enough) in the above screenshot is a fucking senator. Pun not intended. She soothes the cranky Brujah by suggesting they get somebody called Torres deported? I have no idea what that has to do with Lucita assassinating Marcus Vitel, but there's almost certainly going to be fucking involved.

(ETA 23/1/21 -- I regret to inform you all that there wasn’t “fucking” involved so much as gang rape. Never mind.)

Lucita and the Brujah guy almost start stabbing each other (so much for that soothing), but somebody has just set the brothel on fire so they have to GTFO.

The mortal senator can't quite fit inside the escape tunnel because her skirt is huge and keeping it on is apparently more important than not dying of smoke inhalation. But it’s okay, she manages it.

The skirt will be important later, unfortunately.

They come to a locked door in the passage. Oh no, whatever will they do?

Will they take a key out of their pocket and unlock it?

Nah, that’s too fucking sensible.

The Brujah that tried to punch Lucita whips out his dick.

Yes.

He actually fucking does that.

Weird flex, but okay.

(ETA 21/1/21 -- I just realised... what if it’s somebody ELSE’S penis he just whipped out? Like the thing was actually just chilling out and he pulls it out the way somebody else pulls out a cucumber. It’s not attached to his body, it’s just THERE?)

Everyone is completely unfazed by this. Both by the fact he whipped his dick out, and the fact he uses it as a fucking key ring.

Like. Is this a habit of his????? APPARENTLY IT IS.

(ETA: Anonymous Discord friend says:

SDFADLFJASDLFJASDF)

They end up in a sewer.

Garinson keeps a key to a sewer on his dick key ring.

(”Lucy didn’t even break the rules as much as I was willing to let her” yeah I just remembered another place more fitting for a sewer key)

THEN!!!

PLOT TWIST!!

The senator suddenly threatens everyone with a lighter!!

After the kindred are done laughing their ass off, she covers herself in whiskey, sets herself on fire and charges them.

I'm sorry but the way it's worded - pin wheeling, cringing - just makes this the funniest shit. It gets even funnier when you remember they’re knee-deep in water. Ever tried to run in water? It’s. not exactly easy. So presumably she’s tripping and stumbling the entire time and somehow still on fire as she does so.

A kindred tries to escape by clawing his way up the wall. He falls. The senator assassinates him by flinging her skirt over his head and sitting on his face. That part of her is also on fire. The skirt and her thighs are on fire.

And I guess they’re obviously not thigh-deep in water any more ‘cause the poor fuck doesn’t survive this.

what a way to fucking go: death by fire pussy.

Everyone panics, except Lucita, who's like "fuck this", cuts off her head, puts out the corpse, then, uh. uses it as a shield against the remaining flames. as you do.

(Between that and the above screenshot, there’s graphic descriptions of what, exactly, the fire is doing to the senator, and how said senator doesn’t give a flying fuck that fire is kinda hurty because she hates vampires that fucking much.)

Lucita meets a Nosferatu who offers to guide her from the sewers. On the next page, we have an illustration of Lucita, in sewage, looking up at the Nosferatu.

You couldn’t possibly make that picture sexy, could you?

Welp the artist went “Challenge accepted!”

So I wanted to show you guys the picture but I didn’t want to get too banned from Tumblr for an Eternal Hearts liveblog, so I went to my friends for help. One of them, @intimidatethevoid​, answered the call to arms:

Well.

This is awkward.

And so she bestowed upon me this glorious, but also cursed, image:

Yeah.

Her shirt’s somehow come off. And she isn’t wearing any knickers. Hence the Filthy Frank sticker.

And that’s gonna wrap up part 1 of my Eternal Hearts liveblog!

For more, like this post in secret shame so that none of your followers have to see it. To cancel me, send angry anon messages and death threats to my inbox.

[gldie]

✰ ⊰ GOLDIE: ❛ 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 𝐋𝐀𝐏.

A year after her departure from KPWR-FM, 𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐄 has scored a career as being a television host for BET. In this interview, 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃 took the time to drive right on down to Westchester to ask her all the questions that people want to know about her rise to fame and how she’s juggling it along with motherhood and her love-life. 

━━  ❛ 𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐃. ╱ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: Goldie mfn’ Forde! How are you doin’ on this beautiful afternoon? Your house looks great, by the way. I love it! Thank you so much for havin’ me. 

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: Holli Hoooood! I’m doin’ great, actually. Just tryna’ get used to being on the opposite end of an interview. But, no. Thank you for takin’ the interest in interviewing lil’ ol’ me. ❜ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: Well, we gotta interview the hottest women in the game right now and your talk show THE GOLDEN HOUR has been killing it as of lately. You should be proud! You workin’ your ass off and still make time to be a mother. I must say your little boy is the cutest. [ The woman gestures at the little boy who is sleeping on her mother’s lap. ]

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: Aw, gosh. [ She blushes with a wide smile on her face and she glances down at him, running her hand along the baby’s back. ] I don’t know what else to say but thank you. All these compliments makin’ me blush! [ She laughs softly before looking back at the interviewer. ] Workin’ my ass off is in my blood, though. I gotta from my momma. She don’t play that lazy sh*t. Doesn’t he look just like his momma, though? I need that on the record just in case someone tries to say that he looks like his daddy. ❜ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: He sure does, y’all look like twins. Woulda’ swore that you had that baby on your own, honestly. [ The interviewer chuckles before placing her hand on the notepad she held. ] But how are you liking motherhood? Is it a hard transition? 

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: [ The smile on her face doesn’t fade doesn’t fade until she hears the last question that she asks. Sighing softly, she looks up at the sky as she tries to find the words to answer. ] In the beginning it was actually. I struggled a lot trying to get use to being a mother and not letting it consume who I am. Like of course, I’m a mother before everything, but I’m also a sister, friend, business woman, you know stuff outside of that. [ Looking back at the interviewer, she continues with a soft smile on her face. ] I also kinda’ struggled to connect with my child. I felt like I wasn’t going to be the best mother to him, I felt lonely, the whole nine. But now, we’re good. He’s my whole heart. Who I do it for, my everything. ❜ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: That’s beautiful, Goldie. I know a lot of women struggle with Post-partum depression after having their first child. I know it must be hard trying to balance your career-life and being a mother but you make it look easy. 

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: Whew, girl when I tell you it takes a village and that’s the only reason it looks so damn easy. [ A laugh emits from her lips before she feels her child shift in her lap. Mouthing the words oops, she picks him up in her arms before looking over her shoulder for her mother. ] Mommmyyyy, can you get your grand-baby? [ She speaks softly so that she won’t disturb him before pecking his cheek repeatedly. Once her mother walks over and takes him, she turns around to finish the question. ] Without that woman, wouldn’t be no Goldie on television. My mother and father, his father along with his side family help me out so much. He’s on set with me sometimes, but most of the time I want him to be somewhere quiet and not too rowdy. ❜ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: Wow! You seem to have the ideal support group. Why happened to you and ZION’s father?

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: [ A dry chuckle left the woman’s lips as she stared at the interviewer’s visage, swallowing the lump in her throat before she shifted in her seat some. ] Uh, lack of communication and failure to reason with one another. Yup. [ She finished with a soft head nod. ] But co-parenting is great. You know, our focus is completely on our son and what’s best for him. Next question, please. ❜ 

━━ ❛ 𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒. ╱ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: Alright, Goldie. What achievements from last year are you most proud of? 

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: My greatest achievement is Zion Israel Powers. I mean, with all the struggles that I experienced with pregnancy, I couldn’t be more grateful that God granted me the opportunity to be his mommy. [ She couldn’t help but to beam when she spoke about her child. ] The second great achievement of last year was putting myself first and leaving a job that didn’t serve my purpose. I will always be grateful to KPWR, but leaving a job that stifled my creativity was the best decision that I ever made. ❜ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: I know that’s right, Goldie! We leaving everything that doesn’t serve us in 2020, okay!? [ She laughed with a point before moving on to the next question. ] And what about the achievements of this year?

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: And neva’ eva wrong. [ She laughed back while pointing back at the woman with her index finger. ] Uh.. I’m proud of the fact that I overcame a dark time in my life and I found a new part of myself that I never really got the chance to know. I’m happy with... uh... I’m happy with my life. Yeah. I’m making the kind of money that I want. I achieved two of my biggest dreams, I’m more secure in my body and I’m happy. Yeah. ❜

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: We love seeing black women happy, sis. I know a lot of people have been trying to steal your shine and happiness in the blogs. Do you have anything to say to the former talk show host that you replaced? She’s been in the media outlets throwing shade and subliminals a lot. 

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: [ A short chuckle leaves the woman’s lips before she scratches her nose with her acrylic nail, pursing her lips up slightly. ] Mm... Not really, if it’s not direct, it doesn’t get acknowledged by me. I truly wish her the best in her future endeavors, though. I know it’s hard seeing someone else win while you struggle. I been there myself, but hating on the next woman isn’t going to change anything so.. ❜ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: Well said. Very professional! I’m over here tryna’ be miss messy boots and you curvin’ it. You sure you haven’t had any media training? [ She snickers before moving onto the last question of this segment. ] Okay, lastly, what goals do you have for next year?

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: None whatsoever. I’m just good like that. [ The woman speaks with a small smile before tilting her head to the side while she listens to the question asked. ] Goals for next year? To keep growing my brand, girl. Hopefully create my own app, merch, go on a talk show tour, maybe write a book? Who knows! I’m most definitely putting my momma and daddy in a new house, though. I know that. [ She said with a nod before clasping her hands together and shrugging. ] I’m letting life take me on this journey and I’m just ridin’ the wave. I pray it takes me in the right direction. ❜ 

 ━━ ❛ 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐘𝐋𝐄. ╱ 

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: Now this house, what made you choose a house like this? Especially in a neighborhood that you’re not used to.

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: It was definitely a change from my apartment in Crenshaw. I’m still in Inglewood but I’m not on the same block that I’m used to be on. I’m not doing hair out of my apartment to make some extra money. You know, I’m in the rich neighborhood and sometimes, you know I feel left out. But when I saw this house, I knew it was the one for me despite the neighborhood change. I needed a space that could accommodate me and all my needs along with my family. ❜

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: Can we get a tour? I mean, a house this beautiful needs to be viewed by the people and I’m sure your fans would like to see how you livin’. Don’t you think?

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: This isn’t my dream house, but it’s definitely an impressive STARTER HOME, ya’ know? It’s very spacious for family events and my family like to link all the damn time, so. I like it a lot. It’ll hold me over until further notice. I got everything baby proofed because I just know this lil’ boy gon’ be something else when he starts getting more a handle on this crawling thing. ❜

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: The entire house is flawless, but let’s get into this STACKED WARDROBE. You take this fashion sh*t serious, don’t ya’? Let me borrow some of these clothes. Or at least show me how you do it, chile. 

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: I really don’t know what I’m doing with this fashion shit, I just know what looks good on me. Which is damn near everything. [ The woman speaks cockily, letting a laugh follow soon after before she looked over her closet. ] But I think I take a lot of my looks from old models and vixens of the 90s and 00s. Lately, I’ve been getting a lot of brands and clothing lines reaching out trying to get me to wear something from their lines. So, I’m excited about that. [ She says in a sing-song tone before doing a little dance. ] If you ever want me to give you some pointers, be sure to watch my show for my fashion tips segment. The girls really like that. ❜

❛ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈 𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃: I’ll be sure to tune in for that, girl! Thank you so much for this wonderful interview. You’ve been a pleasure to interview, honestly. [ The interview reaches over to shake her hand with a grin on her face. ] I told you it wasn’t going to be that bad. You guys be sure to tune in THE GOLDEN HOUR feature the gorgeous GOLDIE on BET everyday @ 5/6 ET. 

𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐄: Thank you so much for having me! You were great, made me feel so comfortable and everything. [ She compliments the interviewer while she shakes the woman’s hand then she looks directly into the camera lens. ] Listen to the woman, y’all. She know what she’s talkin’ ‘bout. Kisses, see y’all lata’! ❜

[jrueships]

The vampire Russ thoughts you have given out are 😌. He def speaks in a Dracula sort of way sometimes, idk if it’s just me

BUT the main reason for this ask is for some redacted Marcus/giannis thoughts. Or some Chris Paul/ others thoughts, in honor of the finals being almost over!

He is DEFINITELY Dracula core LMAO like dark academia fancy man but... with more fashion

Like... you cannot show me This and NOT tell me he's a fancy possible vampire kin WNDNSKNX

I'm just like. Obsessed with russ as a whole. I know some people don't like him and for valid reasons but like... he's so?? Interesting??? On the court he is unhinged but off the court he's just ?? Chill. Like basketball is anger therapy for him and when hes done with it, he's done LMAO. He sits all fancy and elegantly sips his wine from a glass and braids his kids' hair like!!! King shit man! After a hard day's work of screeching on court, he can lounge back on his throne and speak softly in his weird little mafia king pin sounding sweet voice: totally unbothered. Like!!!! That's so enigmatic to me!!he's so interesting !!!! A truly magnificent Dracula man...

OKAY BUT ABOUT. .... THEM....

HMM....

I think they're a lot like john/trae where they're definitely on the VERGE of being sexy together when they're having sex... but their goofy personalities just ruin the moment (not for them but for normal humans who don't laugh at every single thing LMAO) ... BUT I'LL TELL YOU ABOUT THEM ANYWAYS... I just don't know if it's HOT. Yknow like those are my fav ships. When they have sex but they don't have to have like... the perfect porno version of sex where everything is always hot and perfect and?? Yeah LMAO. I like when they're a bit more realistic and have to pause and ask if something is ok like?? Idk!!that's my shit! Idk maybe that's just me???

ANYWAYS REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED...

Okay. We all know about Mr. Foreplay at night Antetokounmpo. And we ALSO know how much raw short king energy Marcus exudes... I feel like on those special nights, maybe after a hard fought game where they're both competitively Pissed at each other (giannis moreso than Marcus.)... the goofiness is flown out the window for just. Straight up fierce, competitive sex. Whoever c*ms first loses. AJBDJS just practically wrestling. Like.. picture after a Celtics bucks game. Marcus has been bothering giannis nonstop with his defense and giannis is fucking. Mad. Nostrils flared, shoulders hunched up. He hasn't been getting any foul calls and the refs have not been on his side at All during the Marcus defense. In fact, they found it amusing how a 6'3 man can stop a Greek Giant. And they aren't the only ones laughing, because everytime Giannis turns back to look at the little defender... he's got the widest grin with two taunting smile lines adjacent.

Oh hell no.

After a tiresome game, normal players would have went straight to their hotel to take a long nap... but giannis wasn't Normal people. He's storming right into the Celtics locker room, right as Marcus is sending away some straggler rookies from the locker because he Already Knows what's gonna go down.

Giannis has the politeness to wait for everyone to leave before walking Marcus so far into his locker that the defender's knees buckle and he has to sit literally inside the locker looking up at Giannis's looming form. Two big hands at each side of the locker, Giannis cranes himself down at just. Glares at Marcus and his permanent smug smile. Normal people would have shit their pants if they saw this 6'11 man staring like he wanted to rip their intestines straight from their body, but Marcus wasnt normal people. He just grins a big toothed smile and states matter-of-the-factly "you played like shit today."

Next thing he knows, he's smirking at Giannis eye to eye level now that Giannis has him slammed high up a wall, supporting his lower half with strong arms. Marcus's legs wrap around and his hands are already trying to claw marks into the other's skin, tearing at the jersey. Marcus digs into Giannis's back, as if it was the only latch he had onto life. He doesn't care that Giannis has to tighten the hold when he leans over to try and rip a bite into his carrier's neck, in fact, he Likes making Giannis struggle for it. For him.

So yeah, in short, they have locker room sex.

AS FOR LIKE.... just in general ideas of them doing redacted UHHHH

Marcus Definitely gives Giannis lapdances.

But he's got rules that are held in place with an iron fist. Sometimes he says that Giannis can't touch him or he'll have to bind Giannis down into a chair to keep him steady while Marcus Gets To Work. Of course, giannis laughs it off and promises that he won't lay a finger on Marcus. It's simple, all he's gonna do is just dance on his lap? He won't disturb that. Nothing bothers the Greek Freak.

So Marcus keeps him to his promise and climbs into his lap. And straddles him. And he does one long R o l l of his hips, right down where Giannis is feeling the hottest and

O h .

γαμήσω..

Giannis WANTS to keep his hands at his side, wants to keep them steady but Marcus's hips are Right there just Right There and his body is Right there and his bright smile is Right There and his cute freckled face is grinning Right There and he's so close and . Fuck he's so close. He's so fucking close-

Giannis whines and pleads and begs and gives his best puppy eyes. But Marcus holds him to his promise despite it all.

And then, to make Giannis squirm even more, the shirt comes off and Giannis can see just a Hint of a bare skinned hip peeking out from Marcus's pants and Oh Fuck. He's gotta. He's gotta.

Marcus is so slow with his dancing, planting kisses so sweet like he wasn't the one killing Giannis. Like he was playing unaware at what he was doing to Giannis. It was so hot and Marcus was Right there and it'd be so easy to. Just can he Please take off his pants? Both of them? Please? The underwear is constricting everything and it's so- he's so close. Fuck. He's so close. And-

Y e a h . So marcus gives Giannis lapdances.

In sex, they both kinda take turns teasing the other. Even when Giannis is smothering Marcus deep into the mattress with each thrust, Marcus always finds the energy to twist his head back and snicker at how concentrated Giannis is, how sweaty his face is. If Giannis tries to shut him up by sticking his fingers down his everyapping jaw, Marcus simply responds by biting. Still, Giannis takes it as a challenge and responds with his own quips, finding the most success during the aftercare when Marcus is too tired to retort.

After cleaning themselves off in the shower (and having a mini towel whip fight), they both cuddle under the covers. Marcus and Giannis both attempt to be the big spoon, usually ending up with their limbs tangled under the sheets. Giannis whispers about how much he liked seeing Marcus's eyes roll, about how cute his noises were. And Marcus just mutters for him to shut up and weakly hits him with a pillow.

AND FINALLY... just mini thoughts about them..

- giannis sometimes speaks Greek when he gets Really into sex. And he mumbles songs in Greek while he sleeps. Sometimes Marcus wakes up from a nightmare, stays up for a bit, but then hears the faint murmuring of an odd tune sang from his boyfriend's sleepy lips... and it lulls him back to rest.

- as much as giannis prides himself over being a Greek Freak, he's honestly not All that freaky. Just has a high sex drive, really. So does Marcus so their restless libidos work in tune.

- giannis likes pulling at Marcus's braids and trying to undo them. Marcus fucking kills him for it though LMFAO

- giannis does have a 'ring for blowjob' bell. Sometimes Marcus throws it at him if he's not feelin it JABDJAB

- giannis calls Marcus "stinky" in greek but says that it means "I love you" in greek

- giannis is still trying to introduce 'sexy roleplay' into the bedroom but it just ends up spiraling into two theater kids trying to act out their theater kid dreams

ANYWAYS... YEAH... they THEM. A very teasing kinda... unstoppable force vs unmovable rock KABDJSN UHHHH yeah! Those are my redacted marcus/giannis thoughts LMAO. I HOPE U LIKE IT LITTLE ANON!!

I WILL REBLOG THIS WITH CP3 CONTENT SOON!!!!!!!!!! busy rn so if this sounds insane it's because it is LMAO but YEAH. S o o n

[beetlebitchywitch]

-slides u 39 for beetlejuice and runs tf away-

“Are you trying to turn me on or are you really just that oblivious?”

(Kayla, sis, ur gonna kill me. Smut warning, obviously)

You know, you really didn’t mean for today to end up like this. 

Oh, who were you kidding. You absolutely wanted the day to end up like this, you just never really expected it to. Beetlejuice spent all goddamn day flirting with you, but you could easily brush it aside knowing it didn’t really mean anything. I mean, he was a demon, right? It was probably just in their nature. He was just trying to get a rise out of you, that’s all. Really, he was just your demon roommate who lived in the attic and sometimes ate your succulents, and that was it. Nothing else at all going on. 

You couldn’t be more in denial if you were drowning in it.

You’d been waiting for the weekend to finally arrive ever since your boss chewed you out on Tuesday afternoon, so when you finally arrived home on Friday, you threw yourself onto your couch with a heavy sigh, sinking into the cushions like you never wanted to leave them. You suspected Beej was in the attic doing…whatever it was he got up to while you were gone, but you knew he’d be joining you shortly. Almost as if he’d read your mind, he popped into the room, wearing…holy shit, just his dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, exposing his strong forearms covered sparsely with green hair. A blush rose to your cheeks, but you chose to ignore it as you shot him a soft smile. 

“Hey, Beej, what’s going o-?”

“Roll over.”

“What?”

“On your stomach,” he said, as if it was obvious. When you still hesitated, he sighed and snapped his fingers, teleporting you both to your bedroom. Your bed was now home to a large nest of pillows and comforters, accompanied by soft piano music playing from your laptop and a sweet, floral scent hanging in the air.

“What’s all this?” you asked with a curious smile. 

“Well, I knew work really hung you out to dry this week, so I figured I’d surprise you!” he explained with a proud grin. He snapped his fingers, summoning a small bottle of massage oil into his hand. “I made the blanket nest myself. I was gonna give you your massage downstairs, but I figured this’d be more comfortable, hmm?”

And there it was, that lecherous fucking smirk that you wanted to kiss off of his handsome face, damn him. You swallowed roughly at the thought of Beej’s strong hands on you, rubbing the tension away, whispering sweet nothings in your ear as he took you…OK, nope, that was the end of that! You forced the thought away as you took his hand, smiling sweetly despite the flirtatious look he was shooting your way.

“That’s really sweet of you, Beej. Thank you for thinking of me,” you said, squeezing his hand. He beamed, his hair nearly glowing with how neon green it turned. You chuckled, shuffling to your dresser to pull out a few things. “Just let me get changed into something more comfy, mmkay?” 

“Sure thing, babes, take all the time you need,” he said, crawling onto your bed and lounging the newly made blanket nest. You shook your head fondly and moved into the bathroom to change into something more appropriate for the…fuck, massage he was about to give you. 

When you emerged from the bathroom, Beetlejuice immediately sat up straighter at the sight of you- you were wearing soft grey shorts that barely covered the tops of your thighs and a pastel pink sports bra, one that barely did anything to hide your breasts from him. His eyes widened and he cleared his throat awkwardly, trying to distract you from him adjusting himself in his pants. Jesus Christ, he felt so pathetic, getting all hot and bothered over some breather in a sports bra…but you’d never been just some breather. You were all soft and warm and kind, always there for him despite the fact that he was a demon, always encouraging him to be better, to love harder, to live fuller…God, he was so fucking gone for you. 

‘Course, you didn’t know that. You had your head so far up your goddamn ass you couldn’t see what was right in front of you. But judging by how you’d been reacting to him since you got home, he figured he might be able to fix that in the next hour. 

So, he rolled off of your blanket nest, trying to hide his arousal by beckoning you forward and instructing you to lie on your tummy, resting your head on your crossed arms. You relaxed into the soft comforters, feeling incredibly at ease as you heard the soft click of the bottle of oil in Beej’s hands.

“Best way for me to do this is to straddle you, princess. That alright?” he asked, looking you over inquisitively. You hummed your consent, suspecting that wonderfully smarmy smirk to have found its home on his face once more as he settled himself down just at the tops of your thighs. If he wasn’t careful, the boner he was sporting would poke you right in the ass, so he made sure to adjust himself so you couldn’t feel it…yet. “Alright, babes, you just relax and let me take care of you.”

If those words didn’t pull a little gasp out of you first, the feeling of Beej’s cool hands spreading massage oil all over you back would’ve made sure of it. God, they were so big, pleasantly cool to the touch and firm as he began kneading your tense muscles. You let your eyes slip shut, falling prey to the absolute magic he was working on the knots in your back with his thumbs. You were so blissed out that you didn’t notice the little moans slipping from your lips every now and then, especially when Beej massaged a particularly tight knot. But oh, did Beetlejuice fucking notice.

You had never looked so hot in your goddamn life. Your skin was so smooth and soft under his hands, and you were making the hottest little noises he’d ever heard a breather make, and it was all because of him.

“Feelin’ a little better, doll?” he asked, his voice embarrassingly strained. 

“Mmhmm,” you hummed happily, gasping sharply as he dug his fingers in a particularly fantastic spot. “Oh fuck that feels good, keep going, right there!”

Jesus fucking Christ he was going to die. He was going to keel over right then and there, and he was already dead! How the fuck could you be allowed to do this kinda thing to him? You were squirming under his hands, clutching the comforters between your white-knuckled fingers, and moaning like he was fucking you into oblivion, all the while his cock was trapped painfully in his pants and it was so goddamn frustrating. He was so close to snapping, just pulling your shorts aside and fucking you until you screamed, but he refused to do that without your consent. No, he needed you to know, he needed you to say yes, and he needed it now. 

“Beej…fuck, you’re amazing,” you moaned. You bit your lower lip and let out a soft, barely there whine, and that was fucking it. Beetlejuice chuckled darkly and leaned forward, his resolve snapping as he hovered over you completely, keeping his lips close to your ear. 

“Are you trying to turn me on, or are you just that oblivious?” he whispered into your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. 

“What? What are you talking abou-…oh,” you breathed, because now you could feel his cock pressing against your ass. Curious, you shifted against him experimentally, causing Beej to groan into your ear before chuckling darkly. 

“That’s it, sweetheart, don’t think I haven’t noticed that you want me too,” he crooned, sitting back up to drag his hands down the warm, reddened skin of your back. “Because unlike you, I don’t keep my head firmly up my ass.”

“Hey, that is so unfair!” you retorted, flipping yourself over to glare up at him. “You’re the one who’s constantly flirted with me and never followed through! Was I supposed to just know that that meant something, or did I have to find out when you popped a boner giving me a massage?” 

Of course, you suddenly realize the position you’ve put yourself in when you get a good look at said boner, his hard cock only about a foot away from you face where he was straddling your hips. He tried to hide his smirk when he noticed you staring.

“Did you ever think that’s because I was waiting for you to ask?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow at you. “That I didn’t want to be the big bad demon preying on some innocent breather? And not just any innocent breather, one I…you know, care about.” He rubbed his hand through his hair shyly. “You’re more than just someone to fuck to me, sweets, you gotta know that.” You hesitated before smiling softly, your heart fluttering incessantly in your chest because you’d been waiting for what seemed like forever for this to happen and frankly, you’re feeling desperate for him. 

“I…I think I know that now, Beej,” you said, running your fingers through his hair before giving an experimental tug and a short grind of your hips against his. He groaned, biting his lower lip as it faded into a deep growl. 

“Be careful with who you’re messing with, doll,” he warned. “You’re probably gonna want to be able to walk out of here by the time I’m done with you.”

“Please, like you could break me that easily,” you countered, pulling him by the hair to press the full length of his body to yours. “Why don’t you show me what you’re made of, hmm?” He barked out a laugh, shaking his head fondly at your eagerness. 

“That’s my girl,” he breathed, soothing the blush of your cheeks with the pad of his thumb.

“Oh, your girl, huh?” you laughed, quirking an eyebrow at him. He chuckled darkly, quickly grabbing both of your wrists and pinning your arms above your head, leaning in until your lips were so close to touching.

“Sweetness,” he murmured, his breath puffing out and over your lips. “If you didn’t realize that you’re already mine, you haven’t been paying attention.”

Those words sent heat pooling in the pit of your stomach, pulling a whine from your lips as you finally closed the distance between you and kissed him roughly. He inhaled sharply and pressed his full weight down onto you, holding you firmly in place as he ground his cock into your hip as he kissed you back, sucking your lower lip between his teeth and tugging until you whimpered for him. He pulled away and began attacking your neck, sucking gorgeous marks into your sensitive skin while you whined and struggled against his grip. He held your wrists firmly, not letting you budge a single inch while he laved his tongue over the bruises that were just beginning to form, pulling whimper after whimper from your parted lips. 

“God, I’ve been waiting so damn long for this…” he moaned into your skin, shifting downward and snapping his fingers to remove the offending sports bra that was keeping him from more of your gorgeous body. Your nipples hardened at the exposure to the slightly chilled air, which only made Beetlejuice more excited to play with them. He dove in, sucking one into his mouth and circling it with the tip of his tongue, moaning when you buried your hands in his hair and tugged. He gave the same treatment to the other nipple before sucking bruise after bruise onto your breast, pain and pleasure harmonizing so gloriously that it left you breathless. “Mm, you taste so fucking good, sweets…but I bet you taste even better down here, hmm?”

His hands stroked down your stomach and to the waistband of your shorts, lingering there while his eyes silently asked for your permission. You lifted your hips to make it as easy as possible for him to get your shorts off, because you fucking needed them off now.

“Beej, come on, get ‘em off, please,” you whimpered, frustrated at how slowly he was peeling them and your panties off of you. He merely chuckled, taking his sweet time in sliding them down your legs and off completely.

“Patience, doll,” he cooed, making you grumble with frustration. “We’ve waited this long, what’s the harm in taking our time?”

“Easy for you to say, asshole,” you mumbled. “You probably got some in the last few months.”

“Guess again, angel,” he countered. You expected to see mirth in his eyes, but he simply gazed at you. He was completely serious. 

“You…you didn’t?”

“Not a chance,” he said, rubbing his hands up your thighs to land on your hips. “No one else was worth my time, babes. No one but you.”

Those words hit you like a rock. He waited. The horniest, most lecherous demon you knew waited for you. He could’ve had anyone until you finally got your shit together, but instead he waited months just to be with you. 

You rose up onto your knees and pulled Beetlejuice into a long, languid kiss, pouring every feeling you had into it as you laved your tongue over his lower lip, just hoping and praying that it would show him what he meant to you. He smiled into the kiss, wrapping you up in his arms before lowering you back onto the mattress, settling himself between your spread legs. He pulled away from the kiss to lower himself fully between your legs, drinking in the sight of you, fully exposed and glistening.

“Ohhh, baby,” he groaned, pressing a wet kiss to your inner thigh that trembled under his touch. “You are even more gorgeous than I imagined.”

“Beej, come on, please…” you mumbled, running your fingers through his hair and pleading with your eyes. He smirked up at you, content to watch you struggle not to shove his face into your pussy for a few moments longer.

“You ask me so nicely, babes,” he said, his smile growing toothy and almost sinister. “But I bet I can make you beg.” And with that, he buried his face in your pussy, greedily tasting you to your very core. You threw your head back with a gasp, gripping his hair tightly as he circled your clit with his tongue before sucking it into his mouth. Your thighs shook as he gripped them and pressed the flat of his tongue against you, letting you grind against his face and chase the pleasure you craved. Having his face in your pussy was enough to make him painfully hard where he was stuck in his pants, so he snapped his fingers to rid himself of his suit and began to stroke his cock in earnest. He moaned against your clit, the vibrations sending stars to blur your vision as you bit your lip to hold back your moans. 

“I thought you tasted good before, sweetness, but down here you’re fucking mouthwatering,” he groaned, letting one finger come up and trace your entrance. “You want more, sweetheart, hmm? Better let me fuckin’ hear it.” 

“Yes,” you moaned, tugging at his hair to try and force him back between your legs. “I want you, Beej, please just fucking take me.” At this, you heard a deep laugh rumble in his chest.

“Believe me, doll, I plan on it,” he said, slowly plunging his middle finger inside you as he went back to licking intermittently at your clit. You immediately clenched around his finger, moaning as he began to curl it in just the right way, your fists absolutely white-knuckled in the blankets as he practically dragged the pleasure out of you. He quickly added a second finger, fucking them in and out and trying not to come untouched from the thought of that wet heat practically choking his cock. “Tell me what you want, Y/N. Say it and I’ll give it to you.”

“Beetlejuice, please!” you cried out. He tutted, opting to finger you harder, pulling near screams out of your throat, which was quickly growing sore. 

“Come on, baby, I know you can. Just tell me what you need. Beg for it like a good little girl, and if you do it extra pretty, I’ll let you cum.”

You growled in frustration, seething at the shit-eating grin he was shooting you without even once letting up on the unrelenting pace of his fingers. 

“I-ah, ah- want you to fuck me, Beetlejuicccccceshit, oh fuck, want your cock in me so bad, please God I wanna cum, I can’t, I can’t, I’m gonna cum, please!” 

“Mm, good girl. Cum,” he commanded, leaning down to flick your clit with the tip of his tongue until you screamed, clenching tightly around his fingers as you came. He fingered you through it, only pulling his fingers out of you once you’d fully come down, panting heavily with a thin sheen of sweat making your skin glow in the light your lamp gave off. Beetlejuice grinned up at you from between your legs, lips glistening with your cum and his eyes practically heart-shaped.

“God, you’re so fuckin’ pretty,” he gushed, sliding up the bed until you were face to face. He stroked your cheek with his thumb, gazing at you so intently that you nearly wanted to shy away from the intensity of it all. “Knew you’d look so pretty when you cum, baby, but I bet you’ll be drop dead gorgeous when you cum around my cock,” he groaned, kissing you intensely. You moaned as you tasted yourself on his lips, feeling him grind his cock against your thigh as he probed your mouth with his tongue. He pulled away, panting harshly against your skin. “One more time, baby. What do you want?”

“Want you to fuck me, BJ,” you murmured, pressing one more kiss to his lips. “Waited so long for you, I just…I need you…” He smiled against your lips, kissing you sweetly before positioning himself at your entrance.

“Alright, baby, we’re gonna take this nice and slow, ok?” he asked. “Keep those eyes on me, want you to watch me while I fuck you, got it?” You nodded, inhaling sharply as he began to enter you. He wasn’t incredibly long, but God was he thick, his girth stretching you beautifully as he pushed into you. Beej groaned against your lips, watching you intently for any signs of pain as he bottomed out, his hips pressed firmly against yours. 

“Oh fuck yeah, that’s the stuff, sweetness,” he groaned, taking in the intoxicating feeling of your pussy clenching around him, adjusting so beautifully to his girth. “Shit, you’re taking me so well, baby. How you feelin’? Any pain?”

“Mm-mm,” you hummed, shaking your head. You rolled your hips experimentally, gasping at the feeling of him moving inside of you. “Beej, just…don’t hold back, alright? I told you, you can’t break me that easily. Just…make me yours.” That last bit made him growl almost involuntarily, grabbing at your hips impatiently and starting to thrust, picking up speed the louder you moan. He holds you so close, pressing your foreheads together so he can watch you as you fall apart for him. 

“Say it again, baby girl,” he murmured, kissing across her cheek to nibble at her ear. “Say you’re mine.”

“I’m yours, Beej, fuck, I-I need more, harder,” you moan, wrapping your legs around his waist. He speeds up with a deep growl, re-angling himself in the most perfect way, the head of his cock dragging beautifully against your G spot that sends stars to cloud your vision once more. You’re not sure you remembered your name, but frankly, it felt unimportant compared to the bliss you sunk into with each and every thrust of his cock inside of you. 

“Again, baby, come on,” he said, egging you on. 

“I’m yours!”

“Again!” 

“Yours! Fuck, shit, you feel so fucking good, God I love you!”

That was it. Whatever little restraint he had splintered as he pulled you tightly against him, rutting into you with everything he had. He’d never let you go again, never let you leave his arms; he’d die holding you, die fucking you, die loving you, if he could. He moaned louder, thrusted harder, kissed fiercer, and all of it was setting you ablaze from the inside out. You curled yourself into his arms as firmly as you could, wanting him around you, in you, wanting him and only him because you were his, and in that moment, he was all you needed. Your pleasure seemed to seep out of every pore in your skin, your voice hoarse from crying out as he littered you with kisses and bite marks, undeniable claims on every inch of skin he could find. Mine. Mine. Mine.

“Love you too, babes, God, I love you so goddamn much I can’t breathe, and this tight little pussy, mmph, fucking milking me, huh? You’re gonna make me cum, sweets. Is that what you want, you want me to fill you up? Make you mine? Cum with me, baby, wanna watch you cum around my fucking cock-”

You cut him off with a choked off wail, clenching around him as tightly as you could as wave after wave of pleasure rushed over you, threatening to drown you, to bury you beneath a deep abyss, but you simply wouldn’t mind. You felt him spill into you, groaning into your collarbone as his whole body trembled around you. You were floating, you were sinking, you were living, you were dying, and it was everything that you needed and more, infinitely more. You let your eyes slide shut as you came down, feeling Beetlejuice maneuvering you both into a more comfortable position. When you finally opened your eyes again, you were pressed against his chest, your chin resting comfortably right at the top of his pec. 

“Welcome back, beautiful,” he said with a grin, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “Was afraid I’d knocked you clean out. How are you feelin’?”

“Mm, fantastic,” you said hoarsely, stretching your arms a bit before settling firmly into his side. “So, was that everything you’d been waiting for?” 

With a warm chuckle, he pulled you close, leaning down to press a sweet kiss to your forehead as you let your eyes slide shut again, your exhaustion taking you over.

“Everything, love,” he murmured, “and more.” 

(THIS BECAME 9 PAGES LONG. IT’S ALMOST FINALS WEEK. I’M DUMB BUT I LOVE THIS SO WHATEVER)

@scribblepigeon @realmonsterboyhours @yankyo @sapphic-florals @monsterlovinghours @the-ineffable-prince-of-hells @beetlebop

tagging all y’all because I CAN AND I LOVE YOU ok bye

[ayyyez]

MATCHUPS!! i woke up to see you're doing this now but ive never done this before so im not sure what character i want!! i was going to ask fr a naruto character but i have 7 crushes from there and i could. not. choose so i guess i am asking you to pick for me between bakugo and tamaki (if you dont write tamaki than its fine) okay i am an artist! ish! im in art college and i practice tattooing on the side so i think thats what id do if i were fictional too. so i create a lot. (1/2 long ask here)

Okay but you can easily slot into a relationship with both so I’ll do both eheh because you deserve both okay! Also I know I told you this already but from Naruto, you could totally deal with Tobirama ehe. 

Bakugou Katsuki

First of all he needs someone who doesn’t get phased by yelling have a calm, cool and collected conversation with this mess of a boy. It absolutely frustrates him at first that you can remain calm even if he is the complete opposite. He lacks that control but hey he’s getting better and who better to show him the ropes than you? 

He will need you to call him on his shit. That’s the only way he will grow as a person and in the relationship. And because you can remain calm you can do this in a way that doesn’t belittle his feelings. That would honestly only make him madder and more torn up inside. Loves you for it later on. 

Despite needing to be in control of most aspects of his life, Bakugou needs someone who can take the reins in the relationship, especially when that inferiority complex rears its head. That and the fact that you are low maintenance honestly meshes so well with him.

Speaking of low maintenance, he isn’t the type to want to be around his s/o 24/7 so having someone not overly clingy all the time will make him come to you when he wants/needs too. In fact it can make him the clingy one in many aspects because he is so touch starved he will seek you out to be that warmth for him. 

The creative drives you have and his own creativity will also mesh well. He’s creative when it comes to his quirk, he can appreciate creativity in all forms. Also I hc Bakugou being that guy who looooooves tattoos. Thinks they are the hottest thing ever aha and the fact you are talented enough to design and do them? Big tick in his books. 

If in this scenario you are tattoo artist and not training at UA then it will be a nice breath of fresh air for him. Someone he doesn’t have to compete against and he likes? Wow a chance to actually relax. 

I can see the two of you meeting around college age rather than high school age, simply because younger Bakugou has a one track mind toward being a hero and he kind of opens his eyes to the world a bit later after he has gotten a bit of experience. 

Idk why but I can also see you to meeting by getting into an argument? He starts arguing with you and you just come back at him with logic and no fear that makes him go “Wait who is this person.” That’s what makes you stick in his mind. 

Can see him falling for you first. But he’s oblivious to it. You aren’t since he is not very good at hiding his emotions lol. You have to make him say he likes you tbh (I don’t mean force it out of him but you have to ask questions that lead there) Otherwise he will just come to you one day and yell it at you. Gotta laugh at that.

I think you’d be a overall positive influence on him in terms of coming to understand his feelings and the kind of person he wants to be. In turn he can push you pursue your dreams. All that talk about him becoming the no.1 has got to rub off on you in some way right?

I think learning about you fears makes you feel more real to him. Since you’re usually calm seeing you stress about something like being in inclosed spaces, will give him the opportunity to be the calm one in a situation. Lowkey feels important if he is the only one who knows about it and will also be really considerate about these things. 

Bakugou also likes lowkey dates, especially ones at home so it can be just the two of you. He spends every other moment out in the world, it’s nice for him to unwind with you. 

Kiss him first. Seriously it will annoy him because “I was just about to do that.” And like that you set the tone for the rest of the relationship eheh. He will kiss you back straight away so you two are even.

Overall: I ship it. I said I’d keep this sfw but I will say one last thing based on what you said: dominate that man ahaha. 

Amajiki Tamaki

This sweet boy needs someone confident and calm to guide his way through a relationship at first. His confidence will grow over time and he will be more open and honest but it takes him a little while to get there. You would help him a lot. 

I feel like at first, the two of you would either bond over art or music. I can see him being really into art but also being into metal music. You would be friends before you lead into the dating world. He doesn’t really have anyone who shares his music taste so his eyes light up when he finds out you do. 

Cute moments of just sitting somewhere with Tamaki and sharing an earbud each while you swap recommendations. The best way to get Tamaki talking is through music since he really holds it dear in his heart. It always made him feel less lonely. 

Talking about music naturally helps you lean into talking about art. Give him a drawing of a butterfly (or just any drawing in general) and he will melt. Puts in on his wall in his dorm. Treasures that present forever. Won’t directly ask to see you work at first but you can tell he really enjoys it. He looooves your creativity and it makes him wish he could create something in return to give to you. 

He makes a spotify playlist for you but it takes him months before he even shares it with you. Lmao he keeps talking himself out of it. It’s really sweet to because it’s full of songs he thinks you will like and specifically chose for you. Ah, it’s honestly so sweet. 

Like Bakugou, you gotta call him on his shit. Like every time he falls down a hole of pessimism or self doubt you can’t let it lie. He will learn to get better (obvs his anxiety won’t disappear) but he will learn to cope with it all in a different way. 

Arguing with Tamaki will happen. It won’t be yelling or screaming from either parties but it will be deep and emotional. He hits you with his pessimism and putting him self down (sometimes in a way where he assumes your own opinion or feelings) this is where you hit him with the calm, collected logic. 

I think though, as the two of you grow together you will be able to establish healthy communication about this. Also you can help by using your more dominant role in the relationship to make sure he feels loved. A thriving Tamaki = a thriving relationship. 

I can see the two of you going for a lot of dates in parks, especially in the more secluded areas. Tamaki also appreciates nature dates, specially lowkey ones away from lots of people. He is really awkward in public as it is, let alone on a date. 

You’re the one who initiates things most. Taking him by the hand, kissing his cheek and easing him in. He is nervous about intimacy so he looks to you to guide him. Will eventually initiate things but will relinquish control very easily. 

You went to a butterfly sanctuary one and it was the best decision ever. It made him so happy and almost forget all the anxieties on his mind. Perfect time to snap some cute, happy pics of him (candid of course). 

Learning about your fears will likely come in a deep conversation with him one night. When he is feeling particularly anxious about his own fears you help him by talking about your own. It makes him realise that everyone has doubts and fears, even you which makes him feel a bit better. 

Overall: very cute relationship 10/10. And again, dominate this man lmao.

[yankyo]

accident

Chamie has a very bad day

Warnings: Mentions of abuse, blood, not a very happy time 

@realmonsterboyhours is to blame for encouraging me 

   He didn’t mean to. He didn’t mean to. But what did that matter when you were hurt and your blood was dripping from his claws? The clone curled in deeper in himself, already purple and blue hair turning black even as the other clones around him began to swarm around you both, shouting and pushing him away from you. The day had started off so well. How did it quickly become this?

   When he had woken up that morning, he awoke to his comfortable nest of stuffies and stolen clothing. Well, stolen was a stretch, it seemed you had realized he liked things that smelled like you and would wear stuff you didn’t mind him taking. Every week his nest would be deconstructed, everything would be washed and he would have a new round of clothing to curl up against.  You did so much for him, you were the most patient and caring and just the best. You deserved to be treated just as well if not better than how you treated everyone else and with that thought, Chamie got up early that morning to cook you breakfast. Eggs and toast shouldn’t be that hard, right? And a cup of coffee was the simplest thing! He had seen you brew coffee for weeks with the greatest of ease in preparation for this and he was certain he had it. Well, certain until he found himself with a watery cup of half cooked grounds and the charcoal remains of what was once food. One lecture from Ren later and a banishment from the kitchen while the mess was cleaned up, Chamie was left pacing the living room.

   OK.... cooking had been an abject failure, but that didn’t mean he should give up? Right? There was other ways he could help around the house! You had said that you needed to vacuum the other day, so while everyone else was busy in the kitchen, he dragged the vacuum into the living room and got to business. This was fairly easy! The sound was grating but he liked seeing the crumbs disappear and the dirt swirling up in dirt home was entrancing. So entrancing in fact that he didn’t realize he was vacuuming up one of his balls of yarn and the vacuum had begun to smoke until another shout from Ren caught his attention. Another lecture later and your disappointed face as you realized the vacuum couldn’t be fixed, Chamie hid away in the cupboard until it was time for you to go to work. Task one and two ended in screaming failure but that didn’t mean he should give up? Right? There had to be something that even he could do right? .........right? There was a feeling in his gut he knew very well, it was the same feeling he got whenever boss would take the other clones on a job but leave him behind, it was that feeling he got when the others would take a task right out of his hands and finish it themselves. It was this bitter, useless feeling that made him want to curl into a tiny ball and just disappear. But he hadn't tried hard enough yet! There was still something he could find around the house, still something he could do to help your day be easier! He just had to find it! So with that motivation, Chamie crawled out from the cupboard and began his search for a purpose.

   The kitchen was still a no go, he could hear Bee's and Wasp's voices from inside as they cleaned dishes.

   "What made him think he could cook today?" Bee muttered, "damn this is just baked on, we might have to let it soak and hope it didn't stain the pan..." the bitter feeling tightened his chest for a moment, but Chamie quietly pressed forwards. The living room was not much better, Cici and Ren were there still fidgeting with the yarn.

   "How did that idiot not see he was vacuuming up his own shit. Who even let him have the vacuum to begin with?" Cici grumbled as they used their claws to shred the tangled yarn from the vacuum.

   "You know how Chamie is. Once he gets an idea in his head, he goes through with it, no matter how disastrous the consequences." Ren's response made Chamie twitch, wanting to defend himself but unable to think of anything he could say back... after all, it was true he was an idiot. Everyone knew that. So instead he tiptoed past the pair into the next empty room he could find. The laundry room. You did have to clean everything up soon and you always washed his nest, so why not clean this up for you! Maybe if he got the laundry done and everyone came back to the fresh, neatly folded, clean clothes all of his mistakes that day would be forgiven!

The washer had a bunch of buttons and a large dial in the center that the demon stared hard at for a minute, trying to figure out what it all meant. Well.... the hottest water was the best, right? So he pressed that button a few times. Spin? What did that mean? He chose high, just in case. Soil level.... hmm... heavy?? With that completed Chamie looked through the various cleaners neatly set up against the wall. He knew which one bleach was because when he had attempted to drink it way back when, you had screamed because you thought it was dangerous. He gave it a cursory sniff now, licking his lips at the smell, but he couldn't drink now! If he drank it, when you got home you couldn't give him a kiss until every last trace of bleach was gone! So he set that aside and grabbed the big green bottle he deemed to be the clothes soap and poured that into the open mouth of the washer before he grabbed the clothes hamper and started stuffing in the dirty clothes. Once not a single sock more could fit, he grabbed the creamy looking liquid and poured that on top before he closed the lid and pressed start. For a minute, nothing seemed to happen, but before his eyes water started pouring in from seemingly nowhere and the clothing began to rock back and forth as it got wet. Interested, Chamie pressed closer to watch the show and between the pleasant warmness of the washer and the rocking sensation, he soon fell asleep right there.

   “Another one? Lawrence how many of these damn things you plan on making? It’s bad enough I gotta deal with your needy ass all day long.” Juno peered at him over her thick rimmed glasses, disdain clear on her face. “What’s this one even good for?” The question made the newly formed clone shiver, shrinking back under her cold gaze as his hair flashed between colors he didn’t yet understand. All he knew was this lady was bad news and he wanted to be far away from her.

   “I don’t know.” By his side, his little boss was trembling too, but his gaze was focused on the ground instead, his hands tight fists at his sides. “He just... showed up today.” The new clone wanted to hold the boss’s hand, so without thinking, that’s what he did. The hand was small like his, and similarly cold, but the child glanced his way with wide eyes, a tiny grateful smile curling at his lips at the gesture.

   “Oh I see, he’s more of that stupid sentiment you keep clinging too.” the snark made both of them jolt and back away but before the clone could escape her grasp, he was grabbed by the shoulder and yanked forwards.

   “Mom!” Beetlejuice shouted, “Please don’t!” The clone closed his eyes tightly and braced himself, but what good could that have done him when that heavy hand that dragged him along threw him back against a wall.

   “How many times do I have to teach you this lesson! Demons don’t need this kind’ve crap! I swear the only thing you manage to do is fuck everything up! No wonder even your useless father jumped ship at the mere sight of you! I wish I had done the same!” The clone knew he had broken bones, could feel them trying to reattach themselves but the sound of the crying child made him want to crawl forwards. He had to comfort him. He had to stop his tears. His limbs didn’t want to listen, but with great effort, the clone dragged himself by sinking his claws into the grounds and pulling with all his strength, inching forwards bit by bit. “great, now this stupid thing is smearing it’s blood all over my floor!” Juno’s voice was close, but it echoed as if it were far away. The clone ignored it, he had to get to boss. A sharp heel slammed into his back, the ripping pain making the clone yelp. The heel dug in deeper, tearing flesh and crushing bone, but the clone reached for the child, wishing he could stop his crying.

   Chamie jolted awake, his hand reaching for his back as if expecting to find a hole, but when he found nothing, the clone settled back down with a huff. It had been a while since he had that dream... after all, when Boss met you and trusted you enough to meet them, the clones all seemed to be rid of the nightmares that once plagued them all. All good things had their limit, he supposed and tried to shake off the memory, but he couldn’t help but scratch at the old scar that lay on the small of his back. The washer seemed to be done, at least it wasn’t shaking anymore so Chamie reached in to grab the wet clothing. They weren’t super wet anymore and they seemed to have some soap still on them, but that was probably just what happened sometimes so he threw the mass into the dryer anyway and pressed start once more. The house was fairly quiet so as the dryer sputtered to life Chamie stepped out of the laundry room to see where everyone else was. Boss was nowhere to be seen, but that wasn’t weird. He always bounced from place to place, this time Chamie supposed he had gone back to play with Lydia or something. The other's were gone and he didn't hear your voice so he assumed they were off on their own errands and you were probably still at work. That left the house to him for the time being, so Chamie looked around to see what else he could do. Living with nine other people tended to make a mess, even if the others came and went as they pleased and Ren followed after with a dustpan, so Chamie set to picking up the mess laid around.

    Jazz had a little music station to work at whenever he wanted to make a new song and in his creative process, papers and things ended up being tossed to the wayside so Chamie organized the papers to the best of his ability and took the crumpled balls off towards the trash. Better already! Cici, on the other hand left books everywhere. They would start reading one, get bored of it and leave it by the wayside to get back into later, so Chamie looked all over for their books to put them all up in the bookcase. There were a few that didn’t perfectly fit, but with a bit of extra strength and determination, Chamie was able to shove each one into place. Next came Jay’s toys. Jay left his puzzles all over the place, so to clean up, Chamie gathered up the puzzle pieces and found a box that looked like what it came in to put away. His toys were stacked neatly in his corner by Chamie’s own nest and the demon took a moment to look around the living room with satisfaction. Cleaner already! Why didn’t he do this more? This cleaning stuff was easy! He did hesitate when stepping into the kitchen, because he was sure his banishment was far from over, but he could see some unwashed dishes in the sink! Wouldn’t it be good for him to clean those up? Surely even Ren wouldn’t have any complaints if he did that!

    The dishwasher was an interesting specimen that he still was unsure of how it worked. He assumed it ate the remaining food off of the plate and licked it til it was shiny, but when he suggested that to you, you had merely giggled. The mystery still stood. But loading the dishwasher wasn’t hard at all, all he had to do was cram a dish where it fit and keep on moving! When it came time to put the shiny pod in the hole, he paused. Wouldn’t it be better if he just put soap? What was this shiny pod doing? Wouldn’t it be better if the monster in the dishwasher had soap on it’s tongue? With a silent nod to himself, Chamie instead ate the pod himself and poured in some of the soap into the hole instead. Next came finding which button to push to tell the monster it was time to start. Chamie just started pressing until he could hear a hum from the dishwasher and the sound of rushing water. Success! With things looking much cleaner, Chamie curled back into his nest to await everyone’s return home, snuggling up to a long pillow you had put one of your hoodies on to sink into your scent. Nightmares would never hurt him when he had your smell with him, after all.

    There wasn’t any telling when he had fallen asleep, but he was awoken with a start as he heard an anguished yell. The clone all but leapt to his feet to see what the matter was, but only found his fellow clones standing around the living room, all looking rather put out.

    “He ruined my puzzle! I’ve been working weeks on it!”

    “You don’t just cram them in, you moron, that ruins the cover! If even one of them rips, I swear I’ll-“

    “Where the fuck is the rest of it? I was gonna serenade Songbird on our date night!”

    “What the hell did he do? What’s with all these bubbles?” There was too much shouting. It was hurting his ears. He didn’t like it. But even as he tried to cover his ears and sink down into his nest, he was dragged out by his ankle by a very pissed off looking Jazz to face the rest of the clones, each a glaring red as they looked down on the cowering Chamie. He wanted to wail, to tell them that he was just trying to help, but as they bombarded him with questions he could feel himself retreating back further and further into his own mind. What were you thinking? How stupid can you be? You ruined everything! We’re going to have to clean up your mess again! Why can’t you just do something useful for once? His lower lip trembled, unshed tears stung his eyes, seeming unwilling to fall as the clone curled into a ball and tried to appear smaller. He wanted to disappear. Distantly, he heard the sound of the door. Heard a new voice over the chaos of the other clones. A female voice. Eyes that were no longer truly seeing what was in front of him stared blearily onwards, only really catching the motion of what looked like a hand coming at him. Don’t hurt me! He swung without thinking, baring his teeth at the threat as he scrambled back up against the wall, but instead of hearing Juno’s enraged shriek, instead he heard a pained yelp that made his world stop spinning. The fear he had once felt turned ice cold when he registered you sitting before him, your arm bleeding from where his claws had torn your skin open. His fault. His fault. The other clones swarmed the both of you, helping you up to your feet even as they shouted at Chamie, even as they gave him horrified and disgusted looks. He felt the same.

    It was an accident, but what did that matter? He was just doing what he did best, after all. Chamie’s ruined everything.

[calpalirwin]

Somebody to You

Summary: Nothing like a roadtrip to a wedding to make Zyla feel extra sappy about her own husband.

A/N: Sort of in collab with @baldcalum​ @cxddlyash​ and @talkfastromance4​. Thanks for letting me pester you with questions/bounce ideas off of you!

Content: All the soft.

Word count: 3k

And away, and away we go!

__

“My mother warned me about stranger danger, but she never warned me about what to do when the man with the van is your husband,” I joked as I carefully hung up the garment bags in the empty back.

“You could’ve flown with them,” Ashton told me as he started to load up everything we needed. “I drew the short straw, not you.”

I leaned against the van, admiring how his muscles flexed with his movements. God, the fact that this man was my husband still totally blew my mind nearly a year after the fact. “You didn’t draw the short straw. You offered. And we’re a team now, in case you forgot.”

“How could I ever forget the best day of my life?”

I laughed. A sassy retort was on my lips but my phone rang cutting me off. “Hey, Kai,” I answered, barely needing to glance at the caller ID to know who it was.

“Have you talked with everyone about their flight?” her panicked voice asked.

“Yes,” I spoke into the phone. “Their flight leaves later. They’ll get there probably at the same time Ashton and I do.”

“And are you leaving soon?” Kai asked and I could hear the clicking of my friend’s heels as she paced back and forth.

“Yes,” I assured her. “And take a breath. Relax. We’ll probably beat the GPS. You know Ash drives like a madman.”

“I do not,” Ashton piped up at the same time Kai groaned, “If he gets you both killed on the drive out here, I will bring you back from the dead to kill you both myself!”

“So, I get to die twice for something I didn’t do? That hardly seems fair…”

“You married him!”

“Damn right I did,” I smirked before I used my free hand to smack at my husband’s ass as he loaded the last bit of our things into the van for the trip.

“Hey!” Ashton yelped in surprise before turning towards me, his hazel eyes dancing, a seductive smirk beginning to grace his lips, and his dimple making its debut. “I’m supposed to do that to you.”

I snapped my teeth playfully at the man. “Alright, we’re about to hit the road. I’ll keep you updated on where we are, okay?” I told Kai, doing what I could to calm her overworking mind. “Are you sure you don’t want me to drive?” I asked Ashton.

“No!” both him and Kai answered way too quickly.

“Cuss out a guy one time and they never let you live it down,” I muttered, shaking my head.

“Just hurry,” Kai whined. “But not fast. Just regular speed, ASHTON!”

“Yes, Mrs. Hood!” Ashton answered, cupping his hands around his mouth to amplify his voice so the woman on the other end of the phone could hear him.

“He’s lucky he’s married to my best friend otherwise I would have killed him already…”

“Yeah, yeah,” I said with an eye roll. How such a low-strung woman as myself was best friend’s with a high-strung type like Kai was beyond me sometimes. I supposed it really was about balance. “Just take a few deep breaths. Set that future husband of yours to good use. And I’ll be there before you know it.”

“And Britt and Holly!” Kai added with a sense of urgency.

“Shit, did I remind Mikey to confirm the rooms?” I wondered out loud with a playful tone.

“Zy!”

I laughed, “Would you relax? I was teasing!” Then, I mouthed at Ashton in case I had actually forgotten for him to “Text Mikey about the rooms!”

“I hate you…”

“No you don’t,” I chirped.

“Kai, if you don’t let my wife off the phone, we’re going to be late!” Ashton said as he quickly typed on his phone.

“She can talk on the phone while you drive!”

“Not if you want us to live!”

I rolled my eyes more. “I’ll text you from the road. And you,” I said, turning my attention from my phone to Ashton. “Did you poop?”

“Did I po- Fuck. Be right back.”

“You seriously need to stop drinking an entire pot of coffee by yourself…”

“Well if someone drank it with me…”

“Just make less! It’s not that hard!”

“You leave me and my coffee addiction alone!”

“Go poop!”

~~~

“That’ll be five dollars,” the bartender told me.

“For a water?” I asked incredulously, pulling out my wallet anyway. “This is why I don’t go out…” I continued to grumble as I started to hand my card over. Whatever Kai had planned that required me to be in a dress and heels instead of on my couch in sweats and an oversized shirt had better be good. Where the hell was she anyway?

“Put it on my tab. I got it, sweetheart,” a deep and smooth voice from behind me said before a large hand was pulling mine away from paying.

“I can buy my own water, but thank you,” I answered, turning to eye the friendly stranger. And I immediately had to keep my jaw from dropping to the floor. His brown hair was perfectly slicked back except for this one stubborn piece that curled between a stunning set of honey gold eyes. A leather jacket hugged his strong shoulders and the buttons on his shirt were undone to a dangerously low level. I struggled to keep my eyes from traveling further down his body, turning my attention to the hand that was now extended to me in greeting. I shook it, noting the damage to his fingers. A drummer if I had to guess. Fuck. I loved drummers.

“Oh I’m not doubting that. But anyone who buys water at a club immediately has my respect. I’m Ashton by the way,” he was saying when I finally refocused.

“Zyla,” I introduced, giving him my award-winning smile.

“I believe this is yours, Zyla,” Ashton said, handing me the water bottle, and I had to hold back the school-girl like giggle bubbling up in my throat at the way my name sounded rolling off his lips and the way his fingers brushed against my hand.

~~~

“Whatcha thinking about?” Ashton’s voice asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Thinking about how we met actually,” I answered honestly, smiling softly at him.

“You looked hot that night,” Ashton recalled, taking one hand off the steering wheel to interlace his fingers with mine.

I laughed, my cheeks turning red. “I was not.”

Ashton scoffed as he raised his hand that was holding mine to brush his lips against my knuckles. “The hottest.”

“Hotter than our wedding day?” I asked, quirking an eyebrow at him.

“Yes.”

I scoffed and swatted his chest. “Wrong answer, Ash.”

“You didn’t let me finish!” he giggled. “You were fucking stunning on our wedding day.”

“Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner!”

“Any regrets?”

“With you? Never. You know why?” I asked.

“Why?” he asked.

“All I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah is somebody to you!” I sang along with the music blasting lightly through the speakers.

“Everybody’s tryin’ to be a billionaire! But every time I look at you I just don’t care!” he joined in.

“Cause all I wanna be, yeah all I ever wanna be, yeah, yeah is somebody to you!”

~~~

“So what’s your connection to the music industry?” Ashton asked, his attention fully on me.

“Oh, I’m this one’s photographer,” I answered, wrapping my arm around Kai’s shoulders. This was their conversation. Their collaboration meeting. What the fuck was Kai thinking inviting me out? Something in the way Ashton kept trying to get me involved in the conversation made me think I had my answer.

“Oh, she’s fuckin’ fantastic. Top of her game,” Kai bragged, and I knew I had my answer.

“I’m alright,” I shrugged. “It’s just about passion.”

“Oh, modest are we? Mind if I look at your work sometime? See who’s assessment is more correct?” Ashton inquired.

“That sounds suspiciously like you’re asking me on a date, sir,” I told him, leaning forward across the table. If he was baiting, I was biting. I’d be a damn fool not to. And Kai knew it, the fucking sneak she was. I made a mental note to both thank and throttle her for this later.

“And if I was?” he asked, leaning forward himself so our faces were inches apart.

~~~

“Yes, they got on the flight.”

“And Ash has the instruments?”

“Yes, we have everything.”

“You remembered his suit and your dress? And your heels? I swear if you wear flats… or gods forbid… sne-snea- Ugh! I can’t even say the word!”

I rolled my eyes at her antics. Since when was comfort a crime? “Yes, Kai. I remembered it all. Relax.”

“Wait! How are you going to take the pictures if you’re in them?! You’ve always taken my pictures! Oh my, God!”

“You know I have a team, right? Like I run a business. I have employees.”

“But they’re not you!”

“I don’t hire amateurs, Kai. And you will get final say before anything goes to print. Now, breathe!” I left out the part that of course I had brought my own camera equipment for the spur of the moment inspiration, because she knew I never traveled without my gear.

“How far have you guys gotten?”

“Halfway give or take.”

“It’s a 6 hour drive, and you left at 8 this morning. It’s almost 1!”

“Well, we can’t just drive for 6 hours straight. We gotta stop for food and pee breaks.”

“You mean coffee and poop breaks?”

“Same thing,” I laughed as Ashton walked out of the gas station with two bottles of water and a huge bag of Cheez-Its. I let out an excited gasp as I reached for the bag. “Yes! I love you!” I cheered.

“I love you too. Now hurry up!”

“I wasn’t talking to you, Kai. But yes. We’ll be there soon. If someone can stop pooping every fifty miles.”

“I wouldn’t have to drink so much coffee if someone helped me drink it. Or offered to drive…” Ashton teased.

“You wouldn’t let me drive,” I reminded him, opening the bag and swallowing a handful of cheesy cracker goodness.

“That's because you get mad road rage, miss.”

“That’s ma’am to you, sir,” I laughed. “I’m a married woman.”

“Are you ever gonna get tired of saying that?” he asked, a goofy grin on his face.

“Fuck no!” I laughed more, reaching up on tiptoe to peck his lips with mine. “Husband, husband, husband.”

“Wife, wife, wife,” he replied, kissing me after each word.

~~~

“You ever think about getting married?” Ashton asked.

“Like in general? Or to you?” I asked, my senses perking into high alert mode.

“Both?”

I shrugged. “Little scary isn’t it? I mean, every relationship runs the risk of those involved waking up one day and suddenly this isn’t what they want anymore. So to divorce in the midst of heartbreak… well… I guess it would depend on how I felt the person asking me to decide if that was a risk I was willing to take.”

“And if I asked?”

“I’d say call Andy and Ryan to make sure there’s photos and video of me saying yes.”

“Really?” he asked, his voice full of amazement and hope.

“Of all the things I want to be in life, yours is easily at the top of that list.”

~~~

“Fuck, this view is gorgeous,” I marveled as we leaned against the van.

“Yeah it is,” he smiled, his eyes on me.

Heat rushed to my cheeks. “I meant this view,” I said, gesturing out the window to the winter wonderland spread out before us. Kai may be over the top, but the girl had mad style, no question about it.

“I know what you meant,” he told me, wrapping his arm around me and kissing the side of my head. “And out of all the views I’ve seen and will go on to see, none of them matter if you’re not in them.”

~~~

“So, what’s the big secret?” Kai asked, once I had gathered all my girlfriends together.

I answered by sticking out my left hand, letting them decipher the news for themselves.

“Ohmigod!” Britt and Holly screeched in excitement. Britt grabbed my hand to get a closer look while Holly jumped in circles starting rattling off wedding ideas.

I looked at Kai who stared back with a blank expression. “Well?” I prompted.

“I thought you hated the idea of marriage,” was the response, void of any real emotion except genuine confusion. Of all our differences, that had been our one similarity- besides a love of pretzels and an aversion to drinking. While we weren’t necessarily anti-romance, marriage just wasn’t something that had been on our radars. And now for me to be engaged before Britt or Holly, well, it was definitely a shock to the system. I still couldn’t quite believe it myself. The weight on my finger was both surreal and not the least bit heavy.

“I do! I did… I… I dunno.”

“Does he make you happy?”

“Duh!”

“Do you make him happy?”

“I would hope so.”

“Does he love you?”

“Again, I certainly hope so.”

“Do you love him?”

“So fuckin much.”

“Am I maid of honor?”

“Please?”

“Congrats, Zy,” Kai smiled.

~~~

“Kai Theodora Zaher,” Calum spoke, pausing to clear away the thickness in his throat. “You were perfect from the first moment I met you. More than perfect. And while I would never ask you to change anything about you, one thing has always bothered me. Your last name not being mine. Thank you, not only for turning my world on its head, but allowing me to make you Kai Theodora Zaher Hood. I love you, wildflower.”

Kai’s hand gripped my fingers tightly as she held back the squeak and the rest of us choked down our tears. Funny how cynics usually had the softest hearts.

I looked over at Ashton who stood directly across from me besides Calum. If I was closer, the heels on my feet would bring me to the perfect height for me to tuck my head under his chin without me needing to strain up or him needing to slump down. He looked so good in his suit with his hair slicked back for the occasion. And I knew I looked like a bombshell in my own floor-length gown that hugged my small curves in the most perfect of ways. Kai had really outdone herself with this winter wonderland she had created. Every detail no matter how small was absolutely perfect. Ashton’s eyes met mine and his lips moved to mouth “I love you.”

“I love you too,” I mouthed back, before letting my mind take me back only earlier this year when it had been him and I in Calum and Kai’s places and them in ours.

~~~

“I promise to always buy you overpriced bottles of water.”

“I promise to chase the risk that is my life with you.”

“I promise to make that risk worth it.”

“I promise to always be your somebody.”

~~~

“This year has definitely been one for the books, hasn’t it, Kai? See, I dunno if you all know this, but it’s always been Kai and I. Kai and Zy. Zy and Kai. The opposites glued at the hips. Never one without the other,” I paused to squeeze my best friend’s shoulder before I went on with my speech. “All my years with her have been filled with their adventures. But this year? Well, this year started with a wedding. And it’s befitting it ends with one too. Because, you see, Kai and I, for getting married first,” I paused again to smirk over at Luke and Mike who squirmed in their seats under my gaze, “never really bought into the marriage idea. Romance, sure. But marriage was always too messy. And then! Oh, boy, and then these two came right out of left field and messed that right up.” I moved my hand that was squeezing Kai’s shoulder to rest on Calum’s. “Calum, my dear sweet friend, thank you for proving to my best friend what your best friend proved to me. Because while I may not believe in marriage, I believe in mine, and I believe in yours. Best years to you both. I love you.”

I kissed both of their cheeks before handing the microphone to Ashton as he held my chair out for me to take my seat. “Well,” Ashton spoke around the lump in his throat, taking a small moment to clear it. “You’d think that my days as a musician would have prepared me for the opening act completely outdoing the headliner…”

I stuck my tongue out at him and he grinned at me.

“If someone had asked me that the first wedding I give a best man speech at would be Calum’s, I probably would have laughed. That’s how wild this all is. Kai, thank you for flipping his world upside down. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him happier than when he’s with you. And we all know how much he loves his bass, so mad props to you, darling. Cal? Don’t fuck this up, mate.”

~~~

“Good morning, Mrs. Irwin!” Ashton said brightly, waking me up with the kisses he was covering my body with. “How do you feel, Mrs. Irwin?” he grinned when his lips found mine.

“Like I’m on top of the world,” I grinned back.

“Adjusting to that weight on your finger okay?”

“Feels surprisingly light. Like I always meant to wear it.”

“Mmm, that’s probably cuz you were.”

“You really think that? That I was always meant to be your wife?”

“I think you were always meant to be the greatest somebody to me. I just got lucky that somebody was my wife.”

“You’re such a sap,” I laughed, feeling myself tear up at his sentiment.

“Your sap.”

“My sap.”

~~~

“What is it about weddings that makes me want to get married?” Ashton asked as he twirled me in a circle before pulling me against his chest.

“We’re already married,” I pointed out.

“And I want to marry you every day for the rest of my life.”

“And I’ll marry you every time.”

__

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