#sometimes i swear this game/the dm is just rolling dice to fuck with me

[quietsamurai98]

[raguonmynieceandnephew]

"It's so unfair to the Rat Grinders that they are killed instantly and the Bad Kids get to roll death saves." SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUP

THIS IS LONG, AND HONESTLY FOR MYSELF, SO YEAH READ IF YOU WANT

I swear to god, this discourse is going to fucking be the end of me. Idk what kind of mind boggling spell Brennan Lee Mulligan wove into the fabric of the universe that spread through the data center of Dropout in order to absolutely hijack y'all's brains when it comes to Cocklord Assgape and her ragtag of character foils but whatever it was has made you Rat Grinder stans INSUFFERABLE in this site.

The levels of treating fictional characters as if they were real people have reached a level I honestly have never anticipated, to the point of y'all actually being mad AT THE CAST for "mistreating" them and ACTUALLY QUESTION BRENNAN'S CAPACITY TO DM. Do you not get how fucking insane that is?

We can't make fun of Copperkettle, one of the most pathetic, petty and incompetent villains in D20 history anymore (even though she is masterfully written and developed to generate this reaction from us) anymore because it's bullying apparently. I saw an account flip the fuck out because someone compared her rivalry with Kristen to Drake and Kendrick's beef. KIPPERLILY IS NOT A REAL GIRL. SHE IS A MAKE BELIEVE CHARACTER IN AN IMPROV SHOW SPAWNED FROM THE BRAIN OF A 36 YEAR OLD MAN

And then what truly pissed me off the MOST about this whole hell is the fact that, being chronically online avid consumers of this goddamn show, I would think you would have but a grasp of the main cast of characters' characterization.

Why the uproar about Riz saying they should chop Oisin's head off? The same Riz who tortured that pixie from Freshman year by shooting off their finger one by one? The same Riz who murked a disarmed and unconscious Coach Daybreak without battin an eye? The same Riz who ATE THE CORPSE OF KALVAXUS?

And the whole Fabian vs Ivy debacle MY GOD, THE GIRL WAS RACIST TO HIS GIRLFRIEND AND USED HER LAST BREATH TO CALL MAZEY "OBJECTIVELY UGLY". And the funniest thing is that is not even the most unhinged shit he has ever said.

And finally, Death Save Gate: THE RAT GRINDERS ARE NOT PLAYER CHARACTERS. THEY ARE NPCS! THE RULES FOR EACH WORK DIFFERENTLY, ESPECIALLY THEM BEING BOSS ENCOUNTERS. Imagine having to still hit Ivy or Oisin 2 more times to kill them when there is 14 foot tall Porter throwing legendary actions left and right, with Jace, and other 3 spell casters + Mary Ann and KLCK up and running. It's called balancing the fucking game. Also, game masters are entitled to break, mold and make up any rules they want if they find necessary in order to service themselves and their players. IF YOU PLAY WITH ALL THESE RULES AS THEY COME, GOOD FOR YOU AND YOUR TABLE. THIS IS NOT YOUR TABLE.

Not only is Brennan DMing for his CLOSEST FRIENDS EVER, he is also shooting and producing an ENTIRE TV SHOW. So yeah, i think he knows wtf he is doing.

"But the Ratgrinders had no real development": True. But it wasn't for lack of trying from the players. Everytime they tried to know more, the dice didn't let them, so they decided to focus on the mystery. It simply do be like that sometimes.

"But they are just kids!": And so were Penelope, Dayne, Ragh, Zayn, the Bloodrush Players, Aelwyn and Biz. Why wasn't it a problem then? Because most of them were evil to some extent and were about to bring the fucking apocalypse to the world? Yeah, sounds familiar right? And the ones who were manipulated or had any sort of redemption worked their way into earning it, right? Yeah.

In conclusion, I fucking love the Rat Grinders, I truly do, and not unlike 90% of this website, i'm still holding on to hope that they have any sort of development and redemption in the last episode, because I agree, they ARE children and they WERE manipulated by Porter and Jace, but like, can we also agree that they are fucking assholes and had it fucking coming? Also, the BKs are children too y'know. SO STOP BEING FUCKING ANNOYING.

[yourplayersaidwhat]

[Sometimes I am VERY lucky with my dice rolls. INSANELY lucky to the point my friends accuse my dice of being loaded. I have a metal blue and gold dice that's always been rather fair, but I recently rolled five natural 20s in a row with it. In the next session that was two weeks apart, the first roll I made with that dice was a natural 20.]

Friend: NO. NO! That dice is LOADED.

Me: I SWEAR TO GOD it's not! You've seen me role absolute shit with that dice!

DM: Let me see it!

[She takes the dice and proceeds to roll it several times to test its balance. (I don't remember the numbers exactly, just a few.)]

DM: 20. 18. 5. 12. 17. 9.

Player: My turn!

[She does the same.]

Player: 7. 10. 16. 4. 1. 17.

Me: SEE?!?!?!

DM: Okay, we're gonna do an experiment. You take my metal dice, and I'll take yours!

[Session goes on...]

DM: Make a sleight of hand check.

Me: Natural 20.

DM and Player: WHAT.

[And on...]

DM: Make a persuasion check.

[I roll. I hold up my hands.]

Me: [Player], look.

Player: A FUCKING NATURAL 20 AGAIN???!?!?!

DM: WHAT THE FUCK

[I am given back my dice, but I don't use it for the rest of the game. I role three more natural 20s throughout the session with different dice. Just lucky, I guess?]

[the-peak-of-despair]

Asahina, Akane, Kaede, and Tsumugi with a Male S/O teaching them to play DND

megatron720 said: Alright, can i get the Male S/O of Hina, Akane, Kaede, Tsumugi (separately) teaching the girls how to play Dungeons & Dragons.

Me when I saw this request: Oh, this is easy, I have some experience with DND! Me when I realized 3 hours ago that I have never played once and am asking my half awake friend and using old notes from a oneshot I didn’t ever do for references: fuck

I loved writing this, though!! I’ve never played DND before and I’ve missed a couple chances, so I hope I did it justice, but it’s super interesting to me!! I hope you enjoy! -Mod Akane

-Aoi Asahina 

”Dungeons & Dragons..? Sounds cool! What’s it about?” 

-She’s excited to get into it, and loves listening to your explanations!

-She gets really confused though, since it gets so complicated sometimes. She’ll just enjoy joining your group for short one-shots.

-Given the chance, she’ll play either a ranger or a fighter. 

-Literally has no idea how to roleplay, so everything she does is just a natural reaction. Also gets very attached to her characters and basically the entire party. If she fucks up a death save she’s going to get emotional. Will demand cuddles later.   

-She doesn’t have the best luck with the dice. You might wanna fudge a couple rolls for her or she’s gonna die by your second session.

“These are cursed, I swear!”

-She cares more about the emotional moments than the combat and the fighting. Guaranteed both your characters are usually in some sort of romantic relationship almost every time.

“(Y/N), can we play some more? This is really fun!”

He chuckles. “Well, the next time we all get together..”

-Akane Owari

”Dungeons and huh? Is this sexual?” She laughs. “I’m just playing! What’s up with it?” 

-She doesn’t really understand a lot of things and you’ll be repeating yourself a couple of times until she gets it. 

“Akane, you can’t just kill it automatically, you have to roll the dice..” “OOOH, hahah, my bad!” 

-100% always plays a barbarian. You should not be surprised. This was to be expected of Akane. It’s Akane.

-She gets roped into it because of the fighting and battles, and her urge to play and overly strong character. She isn’t too good with the emotional moments, so she tends to just sit back and watch. But she certainly gets invested watching the others interact. 

-She gets super passionate during battles and bosses. She will accidentally throw her dice with full force. Yes, they will rocket across the room. Sometimes, they are not always obtainable again. Keep spare dice on hand.

-Ruthless. Absolutely ruthless. Will be grinning wide every time she defeats an enemy, and sometimes the party has to stop her from fighting every NPC you encounter. 

“Come on, man, make these bosses harder! I want a challenge!”

“Akane, choose your words carefully..”

-Kaede Akamatsu

“Dungeons & Dragons? Ooh, I think I’ve heard about it before.. What’s it about?” 

-She’s really attentive, and listening to all your explanations really closely. Also probably taking notes. She’s super invested and interested! 

-She plays a bard. No hesitation. All you had to say was “music.” She’s hooked. 

-She’s in love with the atmosphere, the worlds you create, the creativity of it all! Kaede’s one of the girls who’s more likely to really look at and appreciate all of these things. She especially loves when the group stops at taverns, and meeting the NPCs the DM creates.

“Come on, Kaede, we need to go..”

“But (Y/N)! The music here is so niiiice! And I haven’t finished talking to this guy!”

“We have quests to do, sweetheart…”

-She gets really absorbed in everything, and super into the roleplaying! Though it’ll take her a little while to get adjusted towards combat. But she’s powerful as shit once she gets adjusted. The dice are on her fucking side. Throw those fuckers in the freezer. Something. 

-A general group leader. It’s just a natural role for her, and she’ll be holding back some people from charging into things blindly. 

-Tsumugi Shirogane

“Oooh, Dungeons & Dragons!? I actually know a bit about it!” 

-Bold to assume Tsumugi, Queen of Really Specific And Niche References, wouldn’t know about DND. 

-She hasn’t played in a long time, so she’s happy to have your help to get back into it, and to have any new advice! 

-She’s able to play just about any class, but she defaults to rouge. It’s just what comes naturally. Y’know, sneaking around, mastery in trickery, doing whatever’s necessary…

-She’s into the whole thing. Dedicated player. Master role-player. Will walk into that DND session both perfectly dressed up as her character while also carrying tonight’s snacks. It’s expected of her.

-She’s super into all the characters and will make costumes for everyone in the group. She loves dressing up with all of you. It makes her super happy! 

-Her character tends to stay in the background when she plays a rouge, but in this game she’s really a jack of all trades. She’s at least got experience in most classes and characters.

“Come on, (Y/N)! Cosplay with me! Our characters look so good together!”

“Well, I don’t know if I’d do well...” “You’ll do amazing! You’ve got me with you, it’s just plain to see!”

[imagineaworlds]

Even Ground -- Mike Wheeler

Written By: Miranda @burrsentme​

Request: “Can you do a mike x reader? Where the reader is a part of the party, and when Will goes missing they like distance themselves from her because they don't want her to get hurt because of the demogorgon. And like the reader sees them with El and she feels replaced and she runs off upset and the demogorgon gets her and they get her back and mike is crying and saying how scared he was and the reader confesses that she likes him and he likes her and just fluffy reunion stuff? Thanks!”

Warnings: light swearing, demogorgon attacks reader

Pairing: Mike Wheeler x Reader

Word Count: 1482

Listen To: Hazy Shade of Winter by The Bangles (from the stranger things soundtrack)

“A long, dark hallway stretches before you. There’s some kind of light coming from under a door at the end, but none of you can see it.”

“I light my torch,” Dustin says, leaning into the table.”

“It probably won’t work, all of our stuff got soaked in the lake, remember?” Will sighs.

“Shit,” Dustin says.

“Roll a d10,” Mike declares. Dustin picks up his d10 and tosses it across the table, and groaned when it landed on 2.

“Sorry dude, no luck with the torch,” Mike shrugs.

“I cast Arcane Eye,” you mumble, fumbling with character sheets and dice.

“Roll a d20 for dexterity,” Mike says.

“What?” you ask.

“Roll a d20 for dexterity,” Mike repeats.

“This isn’t a dexterity roll Mike, I’ve got proficiency in divination,” you argue. Will leans over to get a glance at your spell list, and nods along with you.

“Are you the DM?” Mike asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Don’t be a dick, Mike, Y/N is right,” Lucas chimes in.

“Fine, fine,” Mike relents. You stick your tongue out at him and he laughs and throws a d8 at you. You dodge it and squint suspiciously at him but go back to the game.

The DnD session continues, and all of you scream and gasp as you are confronted with the demogorgon. All of your characters have a brush with death before narrowly defeating the monster.

After the session ended, Mike offered to ride you home while the other guys went their separate ways.  You, of course, agreed. Everyone in your group knew the two of you had a crush on each other, so they all left quickly.

“Sorry about earlier, I was being kinda rude,” Mike says while you slowly pedal through the town.

“It’s alright,” you say, “though the dice throwing was a little harsh.” Mike laughs and shrugs as the two of you turn down your street. You coast up to the driveway of your house and stop just in front, along with Mike.

“Thanks for riding me home,” you say, looking down at your bike handles.

“Thanks for coming to play with us, I know we’re a lot to deal with sometimes,” Mike replies.

“You guys are my closest friends, you couldn’t get rid of me if you tried,” you laughed while stepping off of your bike.

“Hey Y/N?” Mike calls as you begin to walk your bike up the driveway.

“Yeah?” you ask, turning towards him. He’s quiet for a few seconds.

“S-See you tomorrow,” he stutters out before quickly beginning to pedal away.

You watch him ride down the street, not believing for a second that’s what he wanted to say. You decide to pester him tomorrow at school until he tells you what was really on his mind.

The next day, however, your friends are nowhere to be found. You find out through gossip that Will has gone missing and right after the bell rings you’re on your bike pedaling to Mike’s house.

You frantically knock on the door and Mrs. Wheeler answers.

“Hi, Mrs. Wheeler, is Mike here?” you ask while trying not to seem so nervous.

“I’m afraid he’s not, sweetheart, I’m sorry,” she answers and you nod, running back to your bike and pedaling off once again. You head to Lucas’s house, they’re not there. Dustin’s house, not there either. You’re too scared to go to Will’s house. You know him mom must be frantic and you have a strong suspicion the boys wouldn’t go there. You decide to go home and try to contact them through the walkie-talkie system.

“Hello? Mike? Lucas? Dustin? Where are you guys?” You call into the device. No response.

“Come on guys,” you whisper,”...I heard about Will…I know you’re looking for him and I wanna help!”

“Not now, Y/N.” Dustin voice crackles out.

“Dustin? Come on just tell me where you guys are I’ve been looking all day for you!” you say.

“Dustin! Don’t leave me in the dark, guys!” You yell into the walkie-talkie, but you receive no reply. Not then, and not for days. You constantly try to contact them but you’re consistently ignored. It’s only when you just so happen to be sitting in your room with the walkie-talkie do you overhear something.

“At the school...El...meet…” Mike says. You can only hear fractions of the conversation, and you don’t know who ‘El’ is, but you know they’re heading to the school, so you jump on your bike and ride as fast as you can. On your way, you spot a group of boys riding their bikes and you know it has to be them, so you speed to catch up.

As you get closer, you notice there’s a girl on the back of Mike’s bike. You’re confused, you’ve never seen her before.

“Hey! Guys! Wait up!” you yell. Lucas and Dustin turn, and so does the girl, but Mike continues looking straight ahead. The girl stares at you, and you can see her nose is bleeding. She doesn’t smile, or look curious, just stares. You’re unnerved by her glare.

“Mike! Slow down for just a second!” you yell again.

“Go back home Y/N!” Lucas yells, and you’re stunned at the anger in his tone. You slow your bike and let them get further and further away. Did they not need you anymore? You wanted to help find Will. You were his friend, too. Maybe that girl doesn’t want you around. She didn’t look very friendly. You decide that you need to find out what’s going on so you keep riding, but far enough so your ‘friends’ don’t see you.

When you arrive at the school everyone is already inside, so you quietly set down your bike and head inside. You sneak around the halls, looking for the boys when you hear an inhuman screech from just down the hall. You press yourself up against the wall, trying to avoid being seen by whatever that thing was. It turns the corner and you involuntarily scream at the sight of it. It looks horrifying and is easily two feet taller than you. You hear Mike yell from the opposite direction.

“Y/N?! Was that you?!” he sounds panicked. He turns the corner behind you and sees both you and the monster.

“Y/N! Get over here! Run!” he yells, but you’re frozen with fear. You can’t turn or move away from the monster, you can only stare as it runs toward you. It picks you up and throws you over its shoulder before turning and running the direction it came. You’re turned and you can see Mike screaming at you and you scream back at him. Tears are running down your face as you reach out for him, then suddenly, you’re being thrown onto the ground and the monster runs quickly away. You turn to see the girl from before with her hand outstretched and blood running over her lip.

You stare at her in awe before hugging your knees and sobbing into them. Mike is with you on the floor in an instant, hugging you and cradling your head as you cry. You release your legs and cling onto his shirt, and you can hear him sniffing above you.

“God, Y/N, I was so scared I was gonna lose you,” he says, pressing his cheek onto the top of your head.

“What was that thing?” you ask.

“The demogorgon. It’s a long story. Jeez, Y/N, I’m so sorry for leaving you out of this.” he whispers, as he hugs you even tighter.

“Yeah, dick move, Mike,” you respond. You push yourself out of his hug and slowly stand.

“I just wanted to keep you safe,” he says, standing as well.

“Yeah, and that worked out great,” you groaned while feeling all of the bruises forming from being grabbed and then dropped. You walked the few steps to approach the girl.

“Thank you for saving me,” you say, extending your hand for a handshake, “I’m Y/N.”

She stares at your hand and then simply says “El.” You awkwardly drop your hand and nod, walking back to Mike.

“You replacing me, Mike?” you laugh a little, but he can tell there’s some hurt in your voice.

“Never. I like you too much to replace you.” he says, taking your hands in his.

“I like you too. Though probably not in the same way,” you whisper.

“Well if you like me in the ‘I love you’ way, then I’d say we’re on even ground,” he says, pulling you in for another hug.

“I guess we are then,” you reply, putting your hands around his waist. He pulls back and you can see the blush on his cheeks and you know yours are red too.

“What now?” you ask.

“We go save Will.” he responds. You nod, and he takes your hand in his.

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