#something something aging population
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#bro i just had a two week long monster of a period and now im bleeding again#i have myserious wrist pain#and my wisdom teeth are coming in#AND i need a haircut#and school starts in 6 days#whos betting on me getting exactly None of that checked out#the ho rambles#something something aging population#my body is falling apart :')
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sometimes i wish i was a vaccum like it must feel good as hell to have your bag changed
#fixing all my problems by giving myself an organ transplant every 6 months 🙌#trb.txt#anyway something something this website's aging population
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Thinking about Frog culture and Toad culture and Newt culture in RiA qnd how the three girls are shaped by it. Like maybe the different species are considered adults at different ages for reasons that make sense given their species (or maybe it's just a ✨️ social construct ✨️ like 99% of all things in life) but that when applied to humans it's just... unfair and heartbreaking. Maybe toads are considered legal adults at 14 so Sasha, who is culturally like any other toad at this point, considers herself "practically an adult" by age 13 when she gets rid of Grime and takes over Toad Tower. It'd be funny to see little 13yo Sasha screaming about being "practically an adult" if she weren't doing so while swinging a sword at Anne, hands and face bloody, throat raw from screaming, tears running down her face. And Anne, who is culturally a frog - which are considered adults at 16 - can only watch in horror as this kid her age cracks under the pressure.
#raised in amphibia au#my posts#am I giving toads a lower adulthood age because#as a heavily militaristic societ6#i think they would want to conscript as many young toads as possible#and lowering the conscription age would help them with that?#yes!#and also on a more serious note - bear with me for a second -#if toads are like... a lower military caste (below Newtopian forces)#and most are the expendable foot soldiers#surely lowering the age of consent would help with the reproduction of the mass of population available for conscription#you know like how marx said something something the main role of women in a capitalist society is to continue with the reproduction of#the work force#i think i'm#i think i need to stop writing now#but i swear this made sense in my head#the point is. Sasha trauma. Sasha harm.
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Okay I'm gonna put the phone down and try to sleep more I swear
But the way I don't think I'd have had any interest in Jace if he got more characterization because... There's such a foul tone that circles him. Like.
I definitely do it as a dm but sometimes you drop a character in the universe you hate. And your characterization of them just becomes this extension of your derision for them.
And I think if that derision was expanded on Jace would have really been a character I'd just be so bored of.
But as it is he is just a collection of little ideas and HAS to complement the man who killed and remade him because what else is he. The dm doomed him.
#.txt#this is incoherent but it is 5 in the morning#if i don't fall asleep om gonna throw something#jace is so funny though he makes me think of some of my little nothing#antognists that i populate my game with#like this is gilmor he is a middle aged dragonborn. he is defined by his relationship with his coworker.#he is now in prison#he is only in prison because of his relationship with his coworker#he's absolutely fucking doomed by the human he has not interacted with in front of the party#he's so jace coded for that#he will still get no development#because he is not being interacted with by the man who defines his life#......i need to try to sleep
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#i dare anyone to comment something about this websites population aging#ö1 one true radiosender#saving my life every time#imagine listening to ö3 i would rather drive into a tree
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Lineup of all of the characters that appear long enough to need a visual representation of them in the game lol
#I added a few people that you can randomly run into around town (like at the inn or in the forest or etc) and have very short conversations#with just to kind of flesh out the world a little more in a more natural-ish seeming way. Like nobody in the main cast would really#have much reason to talk about the actual city you're in or anything. Since most of them havent lived there that long anyway.#But if there's a ''city inspector'' that you can run into whilst he's writing up notes examining the local inn. then maybe there could be a#few dialogue options with him where you can ask about things like that. since he would know more about the area as an offical Government#Worker or etc. Optional of course. since I have to be so wary of my natural inclination to lore dump lol and am trying extra hard to make i#all stuff thats easily avoided/skipped. But for the people like ME who deliberately choose to exhaust every possible optional dialogue#option and explore every single inch of the world and try to collect as much information as possible - then there are a few extra places to#do that. Though obviously not all of them just give exposition for like 15 paragraphs blandly. Some you don't really learn anything from#and it's kind of just.. random flavor to make the non-shop map locations more ''lived in'' feeling. Like the random#little girl you can talk to in the park doesn't bizarrely start reading out the wikipedia description of some War that happened 10 years ag#or whatever. she's just complains about school a little and asks if you've tried the nearby ice cream cart treats and etc lol#ANYWAY..#some of the art is so so evil but I'm not going to spend 800 years trying to clean it up and update it. whatever the hell mess I sketched#out in 2018 or whatever is just what I'm keeping lol... it is what it is#One of the many trials of the whole 'briefly work a few months on something and then abandon it almost entirely only to pick up work#on it literally like 4 - 5 yrs later and now you must contend with trying to decipher whatever weird shit you did years ago' experience lol#Also given the population breakdowns of the world in general I think there's an unrealistic amount of jhevona in this lineup since#they're a much rarer species to just see out and about anywhere but.. it IS a global trading center type area. and the game#takes place in the north (the country of Asen. near the coast. for the maybe 2 or less people who actually keep up with my worldbuilding#enough to know where that is lol (the same continent as Navyete (where the avirre'thel live)) and there's a decent concentration#of nothern jhevona only a short ways away so... tee hee..I shall pretend it makes sense and not merely me just wanting#to represent more of that species because I think their lore is interesting lol#I MEAN also realistically there would NOT be a human here because humans are extremely isolated species that don't even know the rest#of the world exists really and human territories are extremely protected from the outside world but... of course it's like.. well we need#at least One of them to be there for the Optional Lore. Same with the Ythrili. But at least those are like.. PLAUSIBLE.. not nonsensically#outlandish. If I had a Verrucalt or something in there THEN that would be truly lore-breaking almost lol#ANYWAY.. rambling that only means anything to me because nobody else knows what I'm even referencing but hbjh#also I think my character designs are so funny in the sense that I really do just love to do the same thing over and over again ghbjh#wow... random asymmetry and belts and arm straps and high collars where the neck is completely covered?? you dont say..how novel
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that stupid comicbook.com article and also fan response in general to the companion romance situation annoys me so bad for the sole reason that everyone acts like the only people in the game are the pc and playable companions
#mine#dragon age#so many people use dorian as justification and like. you know we could have non romanceable characters who are gay#where’s the people using cassandra as evidence for why this is good actually#‘it limits the types of stories you can tell’ with THOSE specific characters. however there are probably others#i’ll admit i thought it was bizarre that they made every companion romanceable. i hate to make this comparison bc i know everyone has been#saying they’re similar when they’re really not. but that specifically feels like some baldurs gate shit#but like. think of leliana in inquisition. joker in mass effect. etc. characters whose story develops even if they’re not going on missions#it’s just this weird video game conception that sexuality only exists for romanceable characters#(or i should say. people assume every NPC is heterosexual by default. until proven otherwise by a romance arc)#but like. everyone uses the dorian example. his conflict with his homophobic father happens regardless of whether you romance him#it’s not tied to the fact that he’s romanceable. y’all just see sexuality as only relevant when you personally can or cannot smash#idk if the lighthouse will be populated now that we know it’s in the fade but theoretically we’ll have allies#and some of those allies. may identify as something other than cishet#or other than pansexual if that’s the problem but grow up. pansexual characters are not cheap and not lesser#playersexuality is a concept so gamer bros can pretend their companions are straight#because if they don’t interact with dorian and sera they can pretend everyone is straight in this game#here’s the thing like. i can understand the disappointment that every character is romanceable bc. sigh. gaider does make a good point#but that’s not what’s going on here. people are upset the companions are explicitly pan and the game is Woke#and they might try to spin it as ‘b but what about dorian’s arc in a game like this’ when once again#there may be other characters. who are not companions. who we spend time with#varric and solas are literally in all of the stuff we’ve and neither of them are playable#come ON
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And when the crowd sings the original lyrics, then what?
#taylor swift#speak now tv#better than revenge#I think it is incredibly pointless to change the lyrics to a song that’s over a decade old and existing in multiple formats#purely because of potential backlash regarding said lyric#that song marks a point of growth in her discography and to see her change it because it didn’t age well goes completely against the album#like the only way it needed to be addressed was in the prologue with something like ‘sometimes you look back at the things you say & regret#them not long after you say them’ and that would’ve done it#because like most things regarding Taylor the conversation is insular and not considered by the broader population#and much like ‘Innocent’ if they can’t comprehend that these songs were written over ten years ago and that she feels differently now#that’s their problem and not hers or ours
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It might just be a lot of things. I really don't know. I don't like not having any energy after work but it staves off a lot of our thought processes but at the same time I don't love it. It's tolerable but I want to be doing something else. I wanna be in the dirt and I want to feel the earth under my feet and I want to know she's listening to me and telling me it's ok and I want to take care of her like she's taken care of me. I want to plant trees and cut back weeds and learn to identify our native plants and I just can't do any of that and make a living. It's not even a volunteer opportunity for me. I'm just some random citizen who didn't even go to school for any of it. And I'm so lonely. I'm the loneliest I've been. I love all my friends online I do. Truly and wholly but it doesn't help the fact that I have no one around me irl. And it hurts. And I'm scared. And I am so small all the time. And I just want it to change.
#elias.zip#i think. that dreamis affecting me a little more than I thought it did. it really exemplified that I feel like everyone sees me as not tryin#g to make connections in my adult life but im in a dead town with an aging population i didnt grow up in or around. i can't find public even#ts that would get me around people my age. I can't drive still to go places anyways and I struggle so fucking with the entire process anyway#s that even with the stars aligned I fuck myself over anyways. I'm too weird. too quiet. too loud. not assertive. weird. weird. weird. werid#. just some fucking crybaby.#everyone's moved on from being anxious but not me. I can't do it. i try and try and try and try and push myself out of my comfort zone but n#obody wants new friends. and my interests are too niche. and i dont fit in and nobody wants to be friends with the baby because all he does#is cry and god I've felt worse moving here than i ever did back at the old house and it feels like I'm never going to get to see what cou#ldve been I'm stuck like this!!#sometimes i really wish i could just leave. leave it all. vanlife or backpack or something and learn why i was made to live as a human. i ju#st want to go back home. I wanna see my packmates again. I'll do better this time. Please. I'm sorry
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hhhh i can't find the exact statistics i need in order to do the exact thing i want
#shut up about averages shut up about averages#i forgot why this kinda sucks actually most of the time#giving myself a headache#oh hi worldometers i forgot about you#ok so you won't tell me what percentage of tumblr's userbase is in their twenties#but you can tell me what percentage of twenty something internet users use tumblr#and then i can find what percentage of twenty somethings use the internet#but also stratified weird so i have to go across age groups and just assign 20-30 to 25-35?? i guess??#and then i can find out what percentage of the us population is in their twenties#but you'll only give it to me in raw numbers so i have to do it myself#and that's just for the us you won't give me any data on the other 55% of tumblr users#sorry i guess i have to pretend you're all usamericans#i'm sorry#statistics don't tell you anything about the world other than exactly what they are and also what you make of them#eggsistential speaks#tag rant
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I'm so sorry if yall followed me bc you thought I was cool or funny. today I will be posting about a Scorsese movie from 1973. and tomorrow begins whale weekly.
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(salpingo-oophor-)hysterectomies should be free and they should check if you want one at your annual physical in case you're too scared to ask
#i think it's completely insane that half the population is just expected to deal with often debilitating periods for most of their life#and the only things you can do about it are either difficult to access due to money and misogyny or you have to fuck around w your hormones#which obviously can have all kinds of effects. it's fucking insane why have we not made this easy to get out of. i know why but still#but then even if you do get it out you have to leave some for the hormones or be on hrt of some kind forever#i've been debating for ages if i want to try to get just a hysto and leave the possibility of the hormone fluctuations still ruining my life#or get the whole mess out and then take pills forever? (<- guy who already takes pills forever) or get an ablation but that still leaves#room for dysphoria and the hormone shit. this is all so fucked up#and obviously any of this costs you out the ass if you can even find a doctor who's not too sexist to sterilize you. hell#STRONG evidence against a benevolent god tbh#also if cis men had something even remotely comparable you know all of the above problems would have been solved decades ago.#me
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got gas for 2.99 🎉🎉
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going to a more expensive supermarket with a bag from a cheap supermarket to show where my loyalties lie
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Recent game related things .. hrmm...
#I do like the inconsistency of the first map. that is actually something older but that I re-found and added to my Game Reference stuff#so that when characters reference where they're from I can be accurate. I like that the whole map is kind of shifted up that way. Where the#actual south part doesnt even count as the south since its Too Far and Scary lol. and if you say you're from 'the north' thats basically#like.. one single continent. Though some people do make distinctions like 'north midlands' or etc. still. I like the ways that common#language isn't always precisely accurate like that. and thinking about why a culture would classify things a certain way or etc. etc.#The inventory page is so funny to me because it's literally just the BASe like.. sample layout just to make sure it works properly with 0#actual design into it. just colored rectangles thrown together in MS paint. but what if I like... left it like that.. what if all the other#art in the game and UI is like stylized and fully matching BUT the inventory/journal/etc. screens I just left as plain colored blocks#with random misalignments and black spots and etc gjhbhjj... It looks unfinished in a Funny Contrast way to me.#the wordcounts are just like... my past few days of writing.. I am still not getting 2200 words a day done or whatever I needed. I'm lucky#if it's even half of that .... tee hee.. :3c I do also keep having appointments and other things going on but..grrr...#The full map of the area is probably not necessary but I thought it would be more realisitc if people were able to reference things. Like i#you have people all living in a city area probably at some point someone might mention a neighboring city or some landmark nearby#or etc. so I thought having at least the basic names of what's around for reference would be sensible. A side character mentioning#'oh yeah I don't live here full time I just travel from Marisene sometimes' or whatever makes it seem more like a Real#Fleshed Out Place than people just making vague references like 'the river' or 'i come from a city nearby' or 'i went to a place somewhere#around here' or 'the other city' or etc. lol.. Especially since global cities/global areas are weird as they operate almost like an#independent country within their walls. so it's like a micro country inside of another country usually. just plopped down in some agreed#upon plot of land that won't be too disruptive to the main country around it. That could get very complex depending on the cultural and#political backdrop of where they're placed (though obviously they try to choose the 'easiest' areas possible for it). Asen is a very mild#country without much history of conflict or anything so it's fine. But still interesting that Sifeh and the entire branched out global area#border three other districts of Asen. Which means like 3 times the local representitives you'l have to negotiate with for some major change#or anything. I think one of the 'random characters you can find around the world and have short discussions with just to make the area#feel more populated and real even though theyre not actual important npcs' is going to be a guy who actually serves on the council that#handles running the global areas and he's like.. some perpetually exhausted middle aged elf running around with a clipboard or whatever#ANYWAY...... hrgh... still trying to write when I can....#I WISH so badly that I had the scope for a simple character creation menu and all character interactions would allot for the background#of your player character. And also to have a simple day night cycle where places in the world you explore/people you talk to during the day#have new options or dialogue at night.. BUT alas... I already am so behind on everything as is lol.. aughhh... T o T#As the worlds number one Needless Detail And Complexity Enjoyer i must dilligently prevent myself from adding additional complexity
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there is a special circle in hell for printers and i wish all printers a very go there
#post brought to you by spending half an hour troubleshooting our home printer#only to find out it refuses to print from the black cartridge#i'll take some alcohol to it tomorrow but#i hates it precious#seg.misc#something something aging ass website population
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