#something about this feels OFF and i cant tell what
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헤어져 ( •̀ ᴗ •́ ) - pfu
wc: 1.5k
summary: pulling a “let’s break up” prank on bf!svt !! | pfu ver | hhu ver | vcu ver |
warnings: not proofread, breaking hearts UGH THEYRE TOO SOFT CUTIE FOR THIS I CANT, no real breakups, angst? kinda? not really? fear of breaking up, lmk if anything should fr be tagged
an: i lowkey hate how juju’s turned out … but it’s okay!!! i really wanted to get this done bc i found the req funny because just hearing the words “break up” reminds me of the kungkungdda video with atz yunho saying 헤어져… its lit been stuck in my head since the req came in
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soonyoung
oh my love, he’d be so confused
you’re lucky the trend happens over text because if you did it in person and saw the pout on his face you’d give in right away !!!
he’s opening his phone after waking up in the morning, swiping his palm over his nose and the rest of his face before checking his notifications, when his heart drops
the first one, from you, saying “let’s talk” … quite ominous, no?
immediately he’s going to your house without asking to go and settle whatever he did right away.
you’ve already distracted yourself, staying busy with absolutely nothing while you leave your phone alone to build suspense. you nearly jump out of your socks when your front door starts wiggling, nearly falling out of the frame when it opens. turning around, you’re met with soonyoung, who’s extremely out of breath, clothes all mismatched as he stands in the doorway.
you rush over to him, “youngie, what are you-“
he cuts you off, grabbing you by your shoulders a little too roughly. his look is so intense yet anxious that he might put a dent in his forehead. “i’m really sorry. whatever i did, please forgive me. but you can’t- well you can, but- just please don’t break up with me, okay?”
immediately upon seeing his face, puffy from sleep and all wrinkled up in concern, you fold, taking him into your arms tightly. “oh soonie, i was joking, i promise.” you kiss his cheek, and his head turns so it lands on his lips. “you didn’t do anything, baby.”
he pulls his head back just enough to look in your eyes, eyebrow raised. “do you promise?”
with his cheeks between your palms you nod, pressing your lips to his forehead, holding them there to show you’re being genuine. “of course. i could never leave you, soonyoung.”
junhui
jun is always so quick to answer your text messages, leaving no time in between before answering you
clearly, when you send him a message saying “let’s break up”, his heart drops faster than it took for him to open the message.
immediately he’s sending a message, full of reassuring words.
“i’m so sorry that something happened to make you feel this way. i’ll be over shortly to talk about it, okay? hang tight, i’ll pick some stuff up on the way. just don’t give up, okay?”
you’re already regretting this at his words, feeling so much love for junhui and the way he takes you so seriously. he may be silly a lot of the time, but he handles serious moments so well. your heart genuinely hurts at the fact that he’s probably so worried right now, and all you’re doing is pranking him. when he gets here, you’ll make sure to give him relief.
there’s a knock on your door, and you rush to open it. junhui is standing there with a small bouquet of flowers and a bag with what appears to be snacks. “i know you might not be interested now, but here.. can we try fixing this?”
once you let him in he sets them down, and as soon as he turns around you’re taking his hands. immediately you’re confessing, seeing his unsure face. “juju.. i was joking. i saw people pranking on tiktok, and i-“
“ahh, i see. i was actually really scared just now.” he chuckles softly, cutting you off. “but forreal, it’s hard to tell tone over text. i’d rather you prank me like that in real life, okay?”
the anxiety fades away, and you’re both all smiles again. since he’s already with you, you sit down together for the rest of the night and spend it watching shows and eating what were supposed to be your break-up snacks.
minghao
we all know minghao’s heart is too tough for a prank as simple and common as this
of course, like anyone who’s madly on love, his heart will pick up at first, but he’s too observant!
you both established healthy methods to communicate the way you were feeling if something about the relationship made you uncomfortable, so when all these keywords and behaviors are suddenly thrown out the window his flags go up
you and him both take preserving the relationship and each other’s feelings seriously so you would never just say “i want to break up”
thus, he plays along
minghao is sitting across from you on the couch, reading a book when you call his name. he looks up, and when he hears you say you want to break up with him, an alarm goes off in his head. he closes the book and sits up straight, grabbing your hands to have a proper conversation.
“can i ask what makes you want to?” he’s so genuine, true concern in his eyes as he tries to hear you out.
you look in your lap, hiding your face while trying to keep up the theatrics. “i just.. don’t feel a spark anymore. i’m falling out of love.”
it’s that sentence that makes him realize what you’re doing. you both agreed that whenever a conversation of this scale occurs, you wouldn’t be vague about whatever you’re feeling. you’d communicate clearly, and make an effort to find a solution.
hiding his smirk, he nods, sighing heavily. “ah, okay. i understand. i’ll give you your space then.” he gets up, a solemn look on his face as he heads to your bedroom. as soon as his back is to you, he’s smirking, amused at the thought of waiting to see how long it’ll take before you crack.
clearly, it’s not long, because as soon as he shuts the door you’re up and running towards him. the door nearly breaks with how rushed you are at opening it, immediately crashing into him. “hao, oh my god, please, i was joking! don’t give me space, please, i don’t want it-“
he cuts you off, grabbing you by your chin to kiss you. “oh, i know, darling. i know every little thing about you, like what you do when you’re trying to trick me. now, let’s not do that again, okay? because i’ll gladly do it back.”
dino
just the idea of pranking chan in this way hurts your heart :(( he’s such a sweet boy !! however…
jeonghan waved quite the pretty penny in front of your face, claiming that it will be yours if you pull the prank on him.
you are very aware of chan being unable to catch a break when it comes to being pranked, but you could only pray that with this nice amount of money, he’ll understand
pulling the prank was definitely painful, though
you’re at an outing with chan and his brothers, hanging out at the porch of a getaway home with some of them. you’re by a fire, drinks in hand as you all chat. when chan notices that your cup is empty, he wordlessly takes it from you to go fill it.
as soon as he leaves, you feel a tap on your shoulder. turning your head, jeonghan is sitting next to you, waving his hand for you to lean in. “i’ll give you…” he digs into his pocket, finding nothing and then reaching into seungcheol’s, taking out a wad of cash and holding it in front of you. “this if you tell chan you want break up.”
immediately you’re looking at him with a bewildered look. why would you ever fumble the sweetest man in the world for money? he’s chuckling at your reaction, waving a hand dismissively. “all jokes, of course, but if you really get him i’ll give you all that. for real.”
jeonghan waves it in front of you once again, and you’ve seen how fat seungcheol’s wallet is. and a few of the digits on those bills were pretty large, so… chan will understand, right? maybe scaring him a little for all this will be worth it, right? you can go out together with your winnings…
you sigh, nodding your head. “fine. but if it ends bad, you’ll clean up the mess. and then i’ll kill you.” you smile, shaking his hand before turning to chan who finally returned.
he hands you your drink with a kids to your forehead before sitting down. “what were you guys talking about?” he’s smiling so sweetly at you, and it makes your heart literally hurt at what you’re about to do.
“chan, i think we should break up.” you’re almost grimacing at yourself, and at that sentence everyone around the fire stops talking. no way the couple who makes everyone believe in true love is about to split.
“um, what..? are you..” he can’t even finish his sentence, swallowing heavily as his vision almost starts shaking.
immediately, being unable to take the torture anymore, you turn to jeonghan, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him vigorously. through many complaints, whining and yelling at the elder, you grab the aforementioned money from his pocket.
triumphantly you kiss chan on the lips, pulling away and showing him your new prize. “i’m so, so sorry, channie, truly i would never break up with you, but look what he offered! please say you understand…”
immediately your boyfriend relaxes, eyes narrowing as he looks at the man behind you. “watch your back, han. seriously. that money almost went towards my funeral funds, i swear.”
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#mejaemin#seventeen#svt#seventeen x reader#svt x reader#performance unit x reader#svt performance unit#svt pfu#seventeen performance unit#performance unit#hoshi x reader#kwon soonyoung x reader#kwon soonyoung#jun x reader#wen junhui x reader#wen junhui#the8 x reader#xu minghao x reader#xu minghao#dino x reader#lee chan x reader#lee chan#svt fluff#svt headcanons#svt reactions#— reqs ఇ ◝‿◜ ఇ
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HIII I HAD A THOIGHT THAT HAS BEEN KILLING MY MIND AND I NEED TO TELL IT TO SOMEONE OTHERWISE IM GNA EXPLODE
get this . everyone chilling at ramshackle dorm doing their own thing, yuu (and grimm by extension), ace and deuce sitting by the table talking about whatever crosses their mind
Eventually the conversation escalates to birthdays and holidays and ace asks how old Yuu is. Azul interjects with saying Yuu's age from the contract they signed a few months ago, but then Yuu pipes up and tells them that they're one year older than that.
Theres a small moment of confusion until it dawns onto Deuce that Yuy's birthday was a month or two ago and they never spoke a peep about it. Not even to grimm!! And when asked, Yuy makes an excuse like "that was when __ was kind of close to overblotting and I didn't want to make it about me because that'd be so nitpicky—"
It was based off an audio i heard and idk if i want to write it into a short drabble for myself i probably cant since im only on book 2 ueue). But like. its a fun prompt methinks. what would all of them do when they find out Yuu deliberately didn't say a thing about their birthday
🎊
You didn't tell them about your birthday?!
characters: Ace Trappola, Deuce Spade, Azul Ashengrotto, Grimm.
author's note: let's just pretend I didn't just post a request from almost 2 years ago 😭 I'm deeply sorry. also, I apologize for not uploading anything this month but I'm working on something big 🙏
warnings: none
Ace Trappola
For his Immediate Reaction, he is offended in the most dramatic way possible. He gasps like you’ve committed the ultimate betrayal.
Once he processes that you skipped celebrating because of an overblot situation, Ace feels a bit guilty. He won’t outright admit it, but his teasing becomes a little softer as a result.
He insists on throwing you an over-the-top, borderline ridiculous party.
“I’m talking about party hats for everyone and cake so big Grimm can’t finish it—well, maybe.”
His idea of a celebration is half a joke, but you know he’s secretly serious about making it memorable and deep down, he’s touched by how considerate you were and wants to make sure you never feel overlooked again.
Deuce Spade
Deuce is visibly upset, almost like he’s the one who forgot your birthday, feeling terrible for not realizing sooner.
“But Prefect, birthdays are important! You deserve to be celebrated!”
He gets way too worked up about making it up to you, like it’s a mission, he might also wonder if he’s a bad friend for not noticing your birthday had passed. He’ll pay more attention to your subtle hints in the future (even if you weren’t giving any).
"I won’t let this happen again. Next time, we’ll do something amazing. I swear.”
You swear his sincerity makes you feel just as guilty for not telling him.
Azul Ashengrotto
Acts unbothered on the surface but lowkey blames himself for not catching on sooner, especially since he prides himself on knowing useful details about everyone (and blackmailing them).
Azul will subtly try to make it up to you in his own way. Maybe he gives you a small but meaningful gift with a nonchalant...
“Consider this a late birthday present.”
He might tease you about this later saying something like...
“Oh, Prefect, you wouldn’t hide something as important as a birthday from us again, would you? It’s not wise to keep secrets from your allies.”
But the teasing is his way of showing he cares.
Grimm
“You didn’t even tell me, your best pal?! Unbelievable!”
He paces around the room dramatically, occasionally glaring at you with exaggerated betrayal.
As much as he tries to play it off as annoyance, it’s clear he’s genuinely hurt that you didn’t trust him with such important information.
“I live here! I’m supposed to know these things!”
His solution to everything is cake.
“Alright, let’s bake a cake right now. Wait, no—you bake the cake, and I’ll taste-test it!”
Grimm will insist on celebrating your birthday retroactively, even if it’s something small. He’ll demand a party and act like it’s all for you, but deep down, he just wants to feel like he’s making things right.
Overall, they argue over how to properly celebrate your next birthday. Ace wants chaos, Deuce wants heartfelt, Grimm just wants food, and Azul suggests something elegant but practical.
Despite their differences, they all agree on one thing: they’re not letting you keep secrets like this again. You can expect everyone to be hyperaware of your birthday next year—and they’ll make sure it’s unforgettable.
#twst x reader#twst headcanons#twst fanfic#twst wonderland#twst yuu#twst angst#twst scenarios#disney twst#twisted wonderland x reader#disney twisted wonderland#twst fluff#twst imagines#twst x you#twisted wonderland headcanons#twisted wonderland imagines#twisted wonderland scenarios#twisted wonderland#ace trappola#twst#azul ashengrotto#azul x reader#twst azul#ace x reader#ace trappola x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#deuce spade x reader#twst deuce#deuce spade#twisted wonderland deuce#deuce x reader
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i have this long-running fantasy about roman needing a handler because he cant be trusted not to run his mouth in public and rather than saying you're his assistant, which is what you agreed upon when you took the job, he introduces you as his girlfriend (because he knows what an uncomfortable position it puts you in and he fucking loathes what you represent) and weaponizes it as an excuse to publicly sexually harass you at every given opportunity trying to break your spirit but it actually just makes everyone involved furiously horny :3 :3 :3
“She’s my fucking girlfriend. I can grab her however I want. Right, sweetheart?”
It’s the hardest thing you’ve had to do so far in your newly acquired position. Officially, off the books, your single priority and purpose is to watch Roman. To be his glorified babysitter, so to speak. Everything was set in place, everything went so well and so easily for weeks. Weeks. It was easy to play the role of assistant - take notes, suffer his constant moaning and groaning and bitching, his lewd jokes and incessant flirting. It’s not hard to ignore his advances and take them for what they are, Roman acting out and being an asshole. The constant forced bravado. His smirking, his wandering eye, constantly sliding over your body like oil, like hands.
But this - this you can’t ignore. You look into the surprised faces of Kendall and Shiv, their eyes bouncing between you and Roman to discern what the fuck is going on.
“Girlfriend?” Shiv scoffs. “Isn’t she your assistant? Can you - can you even legally date your assistant, Rome?”
Kendall charges into the conversation, ready to control it. “Wait, wait… is this for real?” He eyes you specifically, but the only thing you feel is internal panic. “Are you fucking with us?”
“Nah, nope. Real deal. She’s not even my assistant, I just like to keep sexy secrets around.” Roman wraps an arm around your waist and yanks you closer, watching you with his glittering, dark eyes. “Isn’t that right?”
The flush creeping up your neck paints you the most embarrassing shade of red. Roman’s smirk tells you that he could eat you alive, that he’s enjoying every awkward second of this forced exchange. And - oh fuck. Fuck. He knows.
He’s not supposed to know - nobody is. Employed specifically by the hand of God himself (which is to say, Logan and Gerri), your only job aside from watching Roman is to keep the secret. To act as his assistant, but not to let on. It’s hard enough not to move under the penetrating gaze of his siblings, too smart for their own good. It’s been even more difficult to pull the wool over Roman’s eyes. For being such a snotty little nepo-baby brat, he’s actually insanely clever. He has the eyes of a hawk, ears always open. He sees. He notices, he takes mental notes. He can put things together quickly.
You laugh nervously and try to relax into his grip. “Um - well… I didn’t think we’d be… going… public anytime soon, Roman. So, thanks for the… heads-up.”
Roman beams at you, triumphant. He stares at his siblings, skates his hand down to grope your ass, giggling when you jump.
“Wow. Wow, Rome,” Shiv says, shaking her head. She looks at you apologetically, though she snorts laughter into her glass. “I feel sorry for you. What a choice.”
“Yeah,” you sigh. “Yeah, it sure is."
Roman parades you around the rest of the night, ignoring your attempts to corner him and demand an explanation. He keeps the drinks coming, drinking more than usual for himself. Something simmer underneath his enthusiasm - of course, he's finding plenty of enjoyment toying with you. He takes any and every opportunity to swirl you around the room and eye-fuck you, his lips wet from the alcohol, cheeks red.
At one point, he corners you into another room. A den, a library, something, the lights shut off - a room in somebody’s rich house full of somebody’s rich things. Roman’s glazed eyes shine in the dark as he advances on you, stepping calmly forward until your ass hits the edge of a table. He leans forward, barely blinking as he rests his palms on the surface of the table. His breath smells like whiskey, but there are other smells - his sweat gliding on his aftershave, whatever he styles his hair with. A whiff of cologne. He waits a beat, riding on that delicious, nervous silence as you do your best to return his intensive gaze. He’s so close. You have never been this close to him, ever - maybe imagined it, idly, thinking about how despite all of his infuriating habits and his general attitude and how much of a fucking brat he is for a 40-something-year old man, he’s… charming. Handsome as a demon, with a tongue to match. What that tongue might do instead of attacking people. What his slim fingers might do.
“You’ve been lying to me,” he says playfully, and he isn’t playing at all. “Liar, liar.”
“Yeah,” you admit quietly. No use in denying it now. There’s an immediate satisfaction in his smirk, but it melts off, the curve of his smile sliding back down into a near scowl.
“I don’t need you. I don’t need - whatever this is. It’s fucking bullshit.”
“I don’t work for you.” Your voice so soft, so measured. It takes real effort as the alcohol clouds you, as his gaze sets you on fire, and how could it not? “I - I’m just doing my job.”
“Your job.” Roman takes this in, rolls it around on his tongue, in his mind. He tilts his head and looks away only for a moment before he’s burning into your eyes again, so bright and angry. “Right.”
“Right.”
Roman keeps his eyes trained on yours and it becomes sort of an unspoken contest. It’s easy to do, melting into his own eyes like a snapping, green fire, ringed in gold. You hadn’t really noticed before just how beautiful they are. This is your focus as the first tickling of his fingers surprise you - his hand, sneaking up your skirt. They line the inside of your thighs like silk, curious, testing. Taking barely seconds until they’re brushing against your flesh - his eyes widen and his lips part, jaw hitting the proverbial floor.
“Nothing, huh?” He laughs in a harsh, quick breath, anger sliding into something easier - the knowing, the bedroom-eyed stare. The smirk comes back, but it’s fluid this time in a way that’s hard to describe. Softer. More satisfied. “Nothing underneath your skirt. Do you always do that?”
“Not… not always,” you whisper. The hard swallow makes an audible sort of click in your throat and he laughs, a genuine laugh like bells. It makes you warm in all that dark, cloaked in it all like some kind of syrupy drug coursing through your veins. You find yourself leaning into his lazy caressing, yet to actually part the seam of your cunt. Petting, stroking, but never pushing inside.
“Mmm. But just for me, yeah?” He leans in closer, eyes darting toward your lips as he leans in. You can practically taste him. He barely moves, barely breathes, brushing his lips so close to yours you swear you can feel it, but you do nothing in return. Nothing yet. Your hips buck forward without your permission and he smiles. His fingers come away before they’ve done much of anything, and he watches as he pushes them between your lips. “You know something? I want to hear you say it. I want to hear you say that you lied to me, that you want me, and that you like me doing this to you.”
It’s not easy to talk with his knuckles between your teeth, so you don’t, opting instead to suck on them as they slowly come back out. He pushes them between his own lips, like he’s desperate to taste so much as your own mouth. He nods gently. Do it.
“I… was hired by your Dad, and -”
“No. No, try again. Just like I told you.”
His fingers come back. He waits, stroking your inner thigh, so close. So fucking close.
“I… lied to you,” you breathe. He nods encouragingly, knuckles brushing your sex once again. It’s easy to continue, so the words fall out of your mouth: “I… want…”
“C’mon,” he murmurs, and he leans into the curve of your throat, lips brushing it. The tip of his tongue traces a line of fire there, unable to stop himself from pressing his lips against your pulse and sucking you between his teeth, biting, marking you. His fingertips dip into the cleft of your cunt, teasing. “Keep going.”
“I want… you… to - oh my god…”
Roman pushes his fingers slowly inside of you, beckons them, stroking where he knows you want it. A sounds comes up through Roman’s throat, almost a purr, so delicate and needy that neither of you acknowledge it. It sets you ablaze. It has you clutching at his suit jacket, rocking into his gentle ministrations. He holds back, waiting, wanting you to say it.
“I - I want… I want a f-fucking… promise.”
“Demanding,” he teases into your throat. He kisses his way to the corner of your jaw. “Tell me what you want.”
“I - I want an office. My own. A nice one.”
“An office?” Roman barks a laugh, faltering in his movements just for a second before resuming. “An office, huh. What next? A raise? I thought you didn’t work for me.”
“Yeah, actually,” you agree breathlessly, rocking your hips a little. “I do want a raise. I want a raise, I want my own office, and I want you to keep your mouth shut about knowing - knowing what I do.”
Roman hums, and suddenly he’s pushing another finger inside, twisting them to pump into your harder, a little faster. Being mean about it. Trying to take control of the situation, to punish you, maybe. He drinks in the gasp you make, the way you tense up and go up on your tiptoes to escape such direct pressure. He takes his free hand and grasps your shoulder, pushing you back down so you’re flat on your feet and taking it. His thumb presses into your collarbone, close to your throat. A warning.
“And why in the fucking Christ would I do that?”
“B-because - because you… I-”
Roman grabs your face, digging his fingers into your jaw until it hurts. His fingers fuck into you with a brutal, unrelenting pace, and it’s getting harder to think. It’s hard to stay still, to stay quiet. Anger wars inside of you, but how turned on you are trumps everything else. You wince and whine quietly as he jerks your face around, glaring, and if it weren’t for the way he finger-fucks your wet cunt, you’d be convinced he was enraged. Furious. Absolutely ready to tear you apart. And maybe he is. The thought titillates you further and your eyes roll back as a moan ghosts its way past your lips. He shakes your head and clucks his tongue, admonishing you.
“Stop being such a desperate, stupid fucking slut and think. Use your words. If you can’t string a single coherent thought together, why would I even think of keeping you around at all, much less reward you with a new office? Explain it to me or I’ll stop.”
“No,” you protest, and the sound of desperation in your voice brings shame as heavy and deep as the rumble of laughter coming up from Roman’s belly, up through his chest as it seems to fill the room. The sheer derision in that laugh. It has you shuddering, trying to ride his fingers all the same, trying to look away. But there’s nowhere to escape. Trapped against the desk, forced to stare at him.
“You know, I should fire you. I should let everyone know I’m in on the big, bad secret and get you the fuck out of here.”
“No,” you repeat, swallowing a moan. “No. If you do, I’ll -”
“Yeah? You’ll what?”
“I’ll f-fucking tell your daddy that you forced me to drink a-and, and that you -”
“- that I..?”
“That you raped me, right here, and your whole fucking life will be upended and ruined.”
“Oh,” he coos, leaning in to brush his lips against yours. “Oh, well - hey, babe, don’t you know you need my cock for that? There are better ways of asking me to fuck you. If you weren’t such a dumb whore, you’d know that. Is that what you want? Huh?” Roman yanks his fingers out of you and the loss makes you gasp. He struggles with his pants, his belt, and suddenly his cock is out and he’s pushing your thighs apart. There are going to be bruises in the soft, generous flesh of your inner thighs in a couple days, developing bright blue and aching. “But if this is the narrative, we gotta stick to it. Right?”
He shoves inside of you with a violence that surprises you, and it’s hard to tell what’s a game and what isn’t, what he’s really feeling or thinking. All that’s clear is the molten heat between you. He pushes you down on top of the desk, scrambling papers, shoving a stack of books off of it. He presses a hand over your mouth and buries his nose into your throat, breath hot there, tickling. He grunts into your flesh as he sets a brutal pace, palm mashing your lips back against your teeth. The legs of the desk shift and creak with his thrusts.
“Should’ve confronted you earlier. This is fun.”
Fuck off. It’s mangled to near-unrecognizable against his palm, but he laughs anyway, moaning. His hips pick up the pace and he really fucks into you, like he wants to split you in half. He likes it, likes the pathetic, scared little sounds you make, like you can’t decide if you want to cum or cry. He bites down, deciding that maybe both would be really fun. You know, just to teach you a lesson. To let you know who’s really in charge.
“Tell you what - if you can cum before I do, I’ll give you what you want. You just gotta do this one thing for me - right? Hey - sshhh, stop fucking whining like that. You’re enjoying it. It’s pretend, remember? Aren’t we playing one big fun fuckin’ game? You, pretending to be my assistant? So this isn’t real, sweetheart - I can’t fuck my slutty little assistant in here if she isn’t real, right?” He grunts and stills his hips a moment, shuddering before resuming his pace, laughing. “Close one. You’re gunna have to hurry up.”
You squeeze your eyes shut and snake a hand between your thighs. Roman doesn’t stop you - in fact, he only increases the ferocity, like he’s on a mission to derail you. It only serves you to your own end - already aroused beyond belief, cunt clenching around his cock, you give in to the waves rippling through your muscles. You whine and pant against his hand, trying to stay quiet, hips rocking back to meet his inconsistent rhythm as he falls apart. He pulls out, shooting ropes of his cum against your exposed cunt - he spreads you with his free thumb, holding you open so he can cum all over your pulsing clit, your fingers before you can snatch them away, guiding yourself through the aftershocks. He pants, staring at his handiwork as he pulls his slacks back up. He takes a step back to watch you struggle, to watch you shamefully push your fingers into your mouth. There’s nowhere else to clean them, anyway - that’s what you tell yourself as he lifts his eyebrows, sneering at you.
“Wow,” he says appreciatively. “Okay. You’ll go the extra mile and everything, huh? Well - a promise is a promise, honey. You’ll get yours… as long as I keep getting mine.” He winks and turns to leave, leaving the door open as he strolls way and leaves you to straighten yourself up.
#i got all fucking stoned and banged out some stuff i was sitting on a while#mean mean bad bad bad man#ffuuuuuuuck. fuck#manipulative terrible dubcon romey#tw noncon#tw dubcon#roman roy#roman roy smut#roman roy x reader#roman roy x you#roman roy/you#roman roy/reader#whoops
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updates having beaten the game
i also mentioned in my ttyd liveblog that that game's Big Interactive Set Pieces (like the punis and the glitz pit) drastically reduce in number after chapter 3, but spm keeps them through almost every chapter--the underchomp, the dorguys, etc appear pretty late in the game! tbh i get the sense that in terms of structure spm was designed a lot more holistically than ttyd was--hence the insane degree of foreshadowing
i know ive said this like twice already but i really really wish that more exploration stuff was unlocked by the acquisition of new pixls & characters. like, they consistently allow you to access things to complete their respective chapter, & they let you reach the next heart pillar, & that's basically it. it's particularly disappointing considering that it would take very little--toss a block cudge can break somewhere in chapter 3, or have a treasure room in flipside that you cant enter until you have carrie, or even put a peach-related thing in 7-1. then again, in the absence of badges & proper sidequests, what would the rewards even be? more catch cards???
the Chapter Padding/Imposed Backtracking continues to exist, & as i said about ttyd i think that it works best when theres a sufficiently charming framing (eg the overthere stair fruit thing) as opposed to when there's a more flimsy & perfunctory justification (like the hags essentially telling you "redo (part of) this level twice")--it's the difference between feeling like a genuine Quest vs like filling a clunky quota. the dimentio tag thing is like halfway between these two points
the underchomp is kind of fascinating. it's shockingly in-depth (there's interactions for every pixl???) for being essentially a one-off set piece that railroads you to victory
catch cards are mildly interesting but theyre the kind of collection task that's just too herculean to undertake--like, i can only do completionism up to a certain point, & if completing the list is going to rely on a LOT of chance-based rolls then i might as well just install genshin
women really are written in Some Kind Of Way (the hags, luvbi getting in verbal slapfights with tippi & peach, etc)
it would have been really easy to just make the 3d environments be the 2d environments With Extras, so im really glad that they pretty consistently make you lose access to 2d objects and/or add additional hazards
i have found it beneficial to the game experience to just actively Never use hp plus or power plus
"block meal" is so fucking funny
the overthere levels might be the ones where my attention wanders most--tbh ive never really cared for heaven, just like from an aesthetic standpoint
i will say though, the overthere has what might be my favourite background in the game (and that's saying something lol)...... the many, many parallax layers of interlocking circles function almost as an interactive study in adaptive composition
the bonechill fight is a bit of a letdown in contrast to the buildup
i said this before, but i really think all of the "doubled atk" effects ahouldve been +1 or +2 instead, or otherwise all the enemies & bosses shouldve had 1.5 or 2x the hp
the scene where luvbi "dies" was surprisingly heartfelt--her spat with grambi & jaydes produces a sense of emotional authenticity that really elevates the scene beyond the sum of its parts in a way that i dont think any mario game has even really attempted since. yesterday i watched it 2017 for the first time and throughout all the hollow, vapid dead-brother scenes i was struck by how comical that movie's failure to illustrate earnest grief & family dynamics was in comparison to a ~3 minute cutscene from super paper mario
on that note, i really like how after that heartfelt scene when grambi is like "please...... take care of the pure heart............" luigi is like "okeydokey." girl read the room
i LOOOOVVVEEE when dimentio is like "oh btw count, have you ever heard the name 'blumiere'~?" like he didnt gain anything from that it was just pure cattiness, im obsessed with him
i like how the subchapters of castle bleck are themed around their respective bosses--o'chunks's level is a gauntlet, mimi's level is full of tricks & traps, dimentio's level has puzzles & illusions, and bleck's level is like a final labyrinth
castle bleck is pretty similar to the palace of shadow insofar as theyre both largely linear gauntlets rather than "true" dungeons, yet for the most part i like castle bleck a lot better.... i think it's probably a mix of the platformer style being better suited to that kind of level design + the strength of the aesthetic
the final bosses are fun, especially super dimentio. the theme is great, and i LOVE the idea that luigi is like The Ultimate Darkness In Universe & that's just something we're not going to examine further or ever talk about again
between that and negative zone the nintendo wii really was just spoonfeeding luigi to matpat huh
the ending still makes me emotional as an adult! i cant rule out that nostalgia/carrying over the sentiments & attachments that i formed as a kid plays a large part in that, but i dont want to downplay the execution of the scene itself--it's sincere & evocative, it pays off a LOT of buildup, it plays to the attachments you form to the cast, and the music that plays in the wedding scene is gorgeous
nastasia is probably the saddest character. if only she couldve fixed him,,,
replaying super paper mario, sporadic thoughts post-chapter 2:
very easy so far--& although ttyd was also easy, spm's gameplay is sadly substantially less rich thab ttyd's was
having said that the game design in spm is! unrelentingly charming!! the use of platforming as a framework for a varied stream of stage styles (straightforward levels, dungeons, towns, the entire 2-3 Situation) is creative in a way that imo predicts the sort of things the mario maker community later ended up making. chapter 2's set pieces in particular are extremely quirky (the rooms with traps, the rubee thing, the mazelike basement, the merlee game show lmao)
few platformers have boss fights that feel like genuine Combat, so that's pretty cool
i will confess that as a First Dungeon, yold ruins doesnt have half the sauce of hooktail castle--it's much more linear in layout, with far less of that zelda-y "explore & comprehend the space" principle that made ttyd's dungeons hit
in a similar vein, it's kind of crazy how tippi has like a fraction of the personality that goombella had. it's a bit sad for the character doing the vast majority of the talking to just.... not really have any opinions on anything
the momentum of the chapters likewise means very few npcs ever get to stick out. like, even the "first town crotchety old mayor" character was a total one-and-done, one dialogue and you never have a reason to speak to him again (mostly just speaks to the game structure, which is as mentioned a bold enough exercise that i feel i cant really fault it for that)
bringing up a menu to use items In A Platforming Context is not at all natural to me, so im finding myself just not really using them
this game is a masterclass in visual design imo. the npcs & enemies & pixls being made of primitives that reconfigure themselves into different shapes really elevates the interplay of 2d & 3d, the backgrounds/environments are extremely aesthetically satisfying (the Mathmosphere in lineland, the optical illusion in the sky in gloam valley, all of castle bleck), & i love how the constant "digital/tech" motif (eg the "dragging selection boxes to flip/teleport", the trees & shrubs looking like something youd make in ms paint, etc) is an ingenious progression of paper mario's core aesthetic design
dimentio is so fun
the inter-chapter dialogue flashbacks are surprisingly earnest? for such a tongue-in-cheek game where almost every line of dialogue contains a joke of some kind, those exchanges feel humourless & sincere. that probably contributes to the Space the game occupies in all of our memories lol
i ADOOOORE nastasia
likewise it was really interesting how peach's "escape" sequence after chapter 1 was (while, again, still extremely sardonic) aesthetically & narratively framed with such a sense of Hopelessness. that's not to say like "woahh this mario game is 10x darker than you thought!!!!", more that it's just not a space the series commonly ventures into
the Ancients stuff is being leaned into extremely hard lol. ttyd mostly teases at that kind of "mysterious rpg lore" thing peripherally (the riddle tower inscriptions, grifty, etc) so it's interesting how spm puts it front & centre in contrast, without ever sacrificing the sense of mystique
this game really highlights how interesting the wiimote is as a controller--pressing the A button while holding it sideways (ie removing your left thumb from the direction input to press a button) is something that i cant think of any other controller doing, & it projects onto that button a really interesting sense of, like, Valence
it's the kind of game that seems to beg for one of thsoe posts like "things that ACTUALLY HAPPEN in _____"
#spm liveblog#indigoing#i would like to come back to this with more updates after the postgame#then again i said the same thing about ttyd and then Forgot. soooo
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night fight 𝜗𝜚
previous part here!
summary: when sarah gets involved in your plan, you make some slight changes to it, and invite someone new to help.
warnings: none (not proofread)
𝜗𝜚
you had been trapped in your house for two days since you’d snuck out. your dad was being unusually strict recently.. anyway, your plan was due to happen today, so you had to run through it.
1. john b would come and work his shift like usual with your dad helping outiside
2. you’d make a distraction and john b would sneak inside
3. both of you would get inside the study and search for information about denmark tanny
4. john b would borrow whatever he needed and leave.
that was it! pretty simple, but you just had to be very careful. your dad wasn’t the biggest fan of pogues. john b’s shift was due to start at 2:30pm, and it was currently 1:25. you texted him anxiously once more.
you: john b, do you understand the plan? we cant mess this up, okay?
john b: for the last time, y/n, i’ve got it. we’ll be fine.
you stayed in your room for the majority of the day, waiting. however, as the clock on your wall ticked to 2:00pm, you became more restless. you’d agreed with john b that he would text you at 2 to tell you he was on his way. you checked your phone, but there was no notification from him in your notifications centre. over the next two minutes you began checking over and over again, but nothing.
he’s bailed on me. probably to embarrass me, right? you thought. you sighed, wishing you’d known better than to try and help. you lay on your bed, suddenly feeling very sleepy. you closed your eyes and drifted off into a sleep..
you were awoken by a pained yell coming from the study. you immediately sat up, thinking the worst. what if john b had come a little late and your dad found him? what if your dad was hurting him?!
you rushed upstairs, ready to shout at your dad to stop, but when you burst into the study, you found a peculiar sight. your sister was tending to john b’s bleeding wound on his stomach. you cleared your throat as they both looked at you.
“what happened?! why were you not here? i thought you bailed on me!” you said, exasperated, forgetting your sister was right there.
john b smirked and then winced as sarah dabbed onto his wounds once more.
“you seem to care a lot as someone i barely know.”
“i’m just confused. i thought my dad was beating you up or something. why are you hurt?”
john b opened his mouth, but sarah was quicker. she explained how the cops had come to take him away, and he’d made a ran for it. he tripped over in the commotion and sarah had helped him out, taking him back here to help clean him up.
“but what’s this plan you’re talking about?” she said, curiously.
“look, i have to get to chapel hill sarah. the less you know the better okay?” john b spoke up.
“sarah told you all this information already?” you asked him, surprised.
“i-uh, yeah. she said she could get me into chapel hill. i need to go, now.”
“okay then im coming with you.” sarah said immediately.
“no.”
“yes.”
“one last mission, and then i’m out of this dirty, dirty game.” she said, half sarcastically.
she slapped his injury, as john b groaned, before leaving the room. jb looked at you, as you shrugged.
“i mean, i dont wanna miss out on this. besides, i did try to help you. cmon, lets go!” you say enthusiastically.
john b huffed, following behind you as you both headed downstairs. you got into your sisters car, and sarah looked at you as you sat in the passenger seat.
“you’re coming?”
“yes, and you can’t stop me.” i said firmly.
“no, its not that. its just… we both need chaperones. it’s weird if it’s all three of us separately. i mean, this is chapel hill we’re talking about.”
she was right. but who could you go with? topper would snitch, and so would the other pogues you knew. kelce was absolutely a no go, and of course you couldn’t go with your brother-
“i know just the guy. sarah, follow my directions.” john b stated from the backseat.
𝜗𝜚
as sarah pulled up outside the chateau, you had a sinking feeling. you knew what john b was going to do.
“john b, no.”
“what?”
“im not going there with jj as my chaperone. i’d rather just go home.”
“what, why?”
“he probably hates me! he’ll snitch.”
john b snorted, genuinely amused by your sentence.
“clearly you know nothing about jj.”
before you could protest, he hopped out of the car and headed towards the unlocked house. you could hear him calling his friend’s name, and soon, the brown haired boy walked out with his blond haired friend.
jj casually got into the backseat next to john b.
“so, what’s in this for me?” he asked, rubbing his hands together and smirking.
“money.” sarah stated, as you turned to look at her, shocked.
“sarah! we’re not giving him money!” you hissed.
“this will be fun, an adventure. i mean, what kooks get to do this, eh? just let loose a little okay?” she whispered back.
you knew she was right, and you sat back in your seat as sarah continued driving to the dock. you may as well make the most of this trip.”
“uh, you know we can hear you guys right?” jj spoke up from behind you. your cheeks heated up in embarrassment.
“oh shut up jj.” your sister retorted.
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guys ive been so busy over the christmas holidays eeek!! my posting schedule is way off. i hope you enjoyed this short but sweet chapter (sabrina ref), and i’ll be posting again soon! i also wanted to add that although it seems rigut now that im following the obx storyline, i will make some original chapters and scenarios that arent in the series.
#fanfic#foryou#foryoupage#jj mayback x reader#jj maybank#john b routledge#kiara carrera#outer banks#outerbanks rafe#pope heyward#sarah cameron#slow burn#obx season 4#outer banks fanart#rafe outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#obx fanfiction
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Yingdu Episode 1 Thoughts
— funny blend of s1 and s2 formulas (i.e. the more slice-of-life cases but with s2 level of intensity hsjds)
— i cant believe CXS ACTUALLY teleport-dived in front of LG lol
— "when i pass the ball to you" (me: omg he's passing the BALL (power) *sobs*)
— the transfer theory is true we get a win!! also LG hair stays white, I WIN!!!
— (head in hands) why does the room change midway through the red room scene A-
i def think they are hinting at something missing between the death and the dive, considering LG gains a wound, but I don't know what to make of this since it's in ONE scene,,,
— "save them" instead of "save everyone" feels more right? Ik my guy is literally dying, but I can see CXS being more concerned about the others foremost. and everyone kind of implies, yknow, including himself more? maybe thats how "everyone" reads to en speakers tho?
— i had assumed that LG would re-dive from the OG timeline but seems that its a layered dive based on the whole "you might be trapped" framing after the 12h mark (?) end (cant tell if the sun is rising, i think it is).
— on the bright side - we don't have to feel bad for OG QL being left all alone in her timeline anymore BC SHES DEADDD (yaaaay?)
— "I can photograph beautiful men too" us: CAN YOU SAY THAT??? QL: "whoa she's such a pretty cosplayer" us: CAN YOU SAY THAT??
my friend group has 2 jokes fr fr: 1) haha. clicking the link 2) CAN THEY DO THAT (bc cn)
— me: ugliest squeal "sorry. that was a pose" one of my friends: "yuuup"
— meowmeow.....
— the comic panel framing was neat haha.
— so was LG into this series before he became a timetraveler too (if such a loop even exists) or is that a new addition dshjsd- if not new, damn, isn't that a self-fullfilling prophecy lol
— this show keeps pingponging between "EYO?!" and "BROS. WE PROMISE" so hard, its honestly not good for my sanity shj-
— Are these LG's notes? somehow the drawings throw me off - and why does he remember all that? is it not the first dive?
— i love that my friends are just as ship-jokey as me haha.
"why are you doing photos in this corner?" me: "PHOTOS. NOTHING ELSE"
"close your eyes. QL turn around and stand behind him" my friend: "its a kiss" asdhjd
— "its nice helping people find their precious treasures" CXS YOU PRECIOUS TREASURE UGH (repeatedly hits the ground)
— ugh you annoying attractive siblings i hate you (affectionate)
— somebody on the team really likes drawing people throwing chairs at people. (also, vein being so unbothered is so funny tho. bro is built different.)
#link click#shiguang dailiren#sgdlr#link click yingdu#sgdlr yingdu#yingdu chapter#link click spoilers#link click Yx1 spoilers#tori talks#tori has opinions
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On the string propaganda
Heeellll yeah
Bestie is an entire PLACE
I look at those guys and let me tell you the soul of that thing ain't just in the puppet, it's in all the neurons carrying the thoughts and emotions, it's in the power rails that serve as the heart. All the memories in the memory conflux and all the numbers we see flicker across displays, the flux condensers, the puppet; a little avatar.
No way these massive machines see life the same way we do. They have their own experiences and senses and things they hold dear. A world we can't imagine, a way of living we couldn't even comprehend.
I could never tear an iterator apart to be just a puppet. Who am I to decide how's life supposed to be enjoyed or perceived?
You treat your creechurs however you want- I ain't gonna dictate that. But damn, hearing the thrums and buzzes of the linear systems rail? They are alive with so much power, these mechanical beasts are exactly what they should be.
#sorry im just a really passionate on the string believer#you cant tell me that these massive structures kilometers wide capable of things we cant even image would look at something thats#thats comparable to a speck of dust and be like#yes i would like to rid myself of practically my entire body to be that tiny#this aint no “if i were a supercomputer i'd be sad i couldnt see the sky like i do now”#thats only because you have something to compare it to#if i were to suddenly loose everything to be just some microscopic creature i'd be miserable but only because i know what im loosing#id be loosing the ability to think like i do now id be loosing the ability to enjoy the things i do now#i dont know what life is like as a microscopic creature but i wouldnt be willing to give up my life as i know it now#and i think with iterators are the same#just how different is their life from ours and what things can they see that we are missing out on?#give up everything comfortable and known and for what??#to feel the sun? they absolutely have various temperature sensors#see the sky? those overseers were made to see things those visuals are in 4k#other animal comforts?? what about computer comforts??#what makes a lil creature happy may not necessary make a massive supercomputer happy#sorry big rant in the tags um just wanna say this is no hate to anyone who wants their creatures off the string#these are fictional beings and you do whatever makes you happy take them off the string set them loose yess enjoy little robots running#around be happy i love reading ya alls off the string shenanigans#rain world#iterator#drawins#oc veil of dreams#rw talk#rain world oc#iterator oc
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Ty for answering my asks! Recently, I saw some fanart of the gender bendered crew and it got me curios, how much would the plot change if Jimmy was a woman. I mean, she would still be emotionally abusive (esp to Fem!Curly), but at lest, I guess, the crash would've never happened (?)
Also, her relationship w/ Anya: if she was assulted still, it prolly would've been dissmissed, since it's between 2 women. Or, if Anya is male in this scenario, he couldn't really be able to talk abt it, since society decided that "women can't r*pe men", so it's not serious and he should suck it up. Man, it's just sucks to be Anya in any scenario my poor girl 😭
What do you think? If you have an opinion on that at all, that is
-💀
I think the scenario's where the gender was flipped or any level of gender based intersectionality is expanded makes it so much more complex.
If this is the scenario with fem!Jimmy, it comes with the territory of questionable internalized homophobia. Does Jimmy brush it off in this scenario because she doesn't think lesbian encounters are real ones? Is she struggling with her identity and taking it out on Anya who may be openly queer compared a fem!Curly who is either straight or just not interested in Jimmy? Perhaps it's a sort of weird entitled that can occur in female dominated spaces "We're both girls, I know what you have, it won't matter." It's still is something I don't see Jimmy denying in this scenario, he never really denies it in canon just talks around it with Curly. Here I can see it's less about the pregnancy and more so about the internalized homophobia. Not seeing Anya as anything but an unwanted aspect of her femineity and the allure of it, there's a lot more objectification of both Curly and Anya in this alteration as I would believe feels better thinking of them in that light if they are just fodder in her mind. Guilty pleasures that no longer bring her such. It's a careful situation because I don't want this to fall into predatory lesbian stereotyping, Jimmy is just a person who does not respect other people or their choice, if it conflict with what he wants or perceived is owed.
The idea of Curly having to report it and outing her not only as a rapist but queer and the denial, especially in the case Anya and Curly are both out as she feels a sort of resentment she can't be secure with herself that way. If it is masc!Curly, there could be the jealousy of him being able to actively pursue relationships he wants while she feels she can't, Anya and Curly playfully flirt, its casual but it's something she longs for in the same way she doesn't. She obsesses over Curly because she wishes she could be Curly in a social sense in both aspect male or female Curly.
If it's fem!Jimmy and masc!Anya? It's a much more delicate situation. In this scenario Jimmy gets pregnant. Maybe Anya does a blood test after the incident and finds out Jimmy is pregnant. It's a very sensitive matter because if it's fem!Curly her first assumption is Anya may have done something. That is just the immediate assumptions in cases like this. I think the fact that Anya is telling her would make Curly think it's not that simple, especially since Jimmy isn't brining it up or really caring but everyone reacts differently. Jimmy is pregnant however, and that's a big deal, she'll figure that out eventually on her own but how will she react? Curly knows it won't be good, Anya knows too.
I think the crash is instigated in this scenerio by fem!Curly actually doing more, refusing to sweep it under the rug because she can conceptualize that fear, likely she and Jimmy are the only girls on board. She trusts everyone, well did trust everyone, but it's just something you live with. She can't just live with that double standard but I feel like she really doesn't know how to address it. How does she bring it up to superiors without implicating Anya? What does she do with Jimmy, it still feels like she's catering to Jimmy but now the concern is primarily focused on the life this baby will be born into. If it is born at all. I don't think Jimmy would try to kill Anya in this concept but try to spin the narrative it was mutual up until she got pregnant. Curly doesn't really buy it but it's a lot of processing, a lot more he said she said but what Jimmy is saying just doesn't make sense. It gives Jimmy too much time to really settle with the fact she's pregnant and likely can't support a kid nor wants to give birth out in space. Jimmy feeling like she's being othered from the only other woman could also be a factor, maybe even starting into her thinking Curly is behaving like a "pick-me" for siding with a guy over her. The crash is more spiteful in terms of having to protect herself alone, due to Curly not outright supporting her delusions.
It really adds a certain horror to Jimmy's pregnancy hallucinations because after the crash they are about her, her symptoms the sign of showing. She doesn't want the child either and considering what being pregnant can do to your mental/physical state, especially some of the more negative symptoms, I doubt she is handling it well. A lot of Anya's struggles are with the stigmas around male victims. His body reacted so did he want it? He's gonna be a father and courts likely will make him pay or care for the baby even if they take Anya's side, their world is just like that. Would the other's blame him for not doing more, he is a man after all? Should he be considered lucky a woman was that into him? It's eating away at him because not only does he not feel safe, he actively blames himself.
In the case Curly is still a cis guy, its that weird feeling guys often get when talking about male victims of assault. I don't think he'd victim blame but he likely asks or thinks about how it could've happened, why wouldn't Anya just overpower Jimmy? Maybe he couldn't? Maybe Anya didn't have it in him to strike a woman. He wouldn't. Now he thinks of what he would have done if Jimmy did something like that to him. SImilary to my trans!Curly post, he's wondering if it could've been him. It's likely one of the first times in his life he has to think of that type of vulnerability in terms of himself and other men and against likely his girl best friend. I think that arm pat right before Jimmy crashes the ship would really make him feel weird, not like he'd have the time to really dig into those feeling but y'know WERE GONNA CRASH!!!.
In terms of Jimmy and Curly's specific relationship, it just gets messier if they aren't both guys or girls. There's a lot of misogny on Jimmy's side with fem!Curly. He often points out she's a woman captain or makes a point of her being one of the few independent woman in her field and how certain men hate that. It's insidious but Curly doesn't think about or like to cause she likes to believe Jimmy isn't one of those guys. He can be a bit antiquated, maybe a bit of a pig but no ones perfect! Here a lot of his resentment is more gear toward a woman having that power over him as Captain/filling the typical male roles he fails at. He can't stand that she's above him in almost aspect and he likely takes it out on other women. Similarly, fem!Jimmy and cis Curly is just as bad. It's a fact of not knowing if she wants to be him, wants him or wants to destroy him. It's obsession without anything positive. She feels entitled to his space and life and time and he has a hard time setting up boundaries cause, well, Jimmy's a girl, his bestfriend and it comes with all the stigmas around boygirl best friends. To him it's a sort of oppressive doting, he feels wrong telling her not to pick and like he's being controlling. That's how she'd spin it whenever he'd try to make boundaries with her.
They are still just friends but most people can't tell even if they can tell it's not healthy, in both cases. Either way I feel like if they were opposite genders to each other there would a specific infatuation Jimmy would have with Curly that would be less hidden but sort of unaddressed because the idea of Curly rejecting them would make them lash out in a way Curly may just leave for their safety. It's also Jimmy wouldn't want to be with Curly specifically but just want what would consistently provide/available.
If they are both girls, its envy. It's that sort of hate that someone fits the standards you don't, wanting them to be picked second or crack. She likes to get into Curly's head, point out flaws and act like it's just her being helpful. She wants Curly to be a girls girl but only for her. There's a sort of possessiveness like purposely jeopardizing relationships because why would a man come first? That girl hates me and is a pick me, why are you friends with her still, Curly? Like this is silly but think about how Regina George treats Gretchen Wieners and that's effectively how fem!Curly and fem!Jimmy would work but technically Curly has the sway of Regina.
I believe the crash would always happen. Jimmy would try to escape responsibility or really thinking about what they did in any world, any gender. It's about facing the consequences, losing things he refuses to let go of or having to deal with responsibilities he's not ready for. The switching of sex or gender really doesn't change those core aspects.
#this is long cause theres so many ideas to play with here and how jimmy and Curly would work but the specifc things happening with Anya#like if she wasnt pregnant thats a relief but its the sort of situation where she has to think about her own sexuality in the scenerio shes#queer and how Jimmy affect her. Its addressing it with Curly who may get it but maybe she gets it too much maybe its hard to hear about Jim#cause for all she knew Jimmy was straight and now she has to think of all the odd conversations and nights they shared beds and maybe#feelings she had but she has to focus on putting Anya first but what does she do? Outing someone is bad but this can be dismmised?#Would the pony express just punish both anya and jimmy and curly what if theres a dont ask dont tell policy? what if they dont care cause#they are all women. its not an issue if its just girls not getting along after “experimenting”. Back to male Anya and female Jimmy they wil#assume it was consensual and anya just doesnt want the kid often that is pushed on male rape narratives. Jimmy is pregnant and on edge#does Curly also have to factor in the child? I feel like the feast scene would be Jimmy delusionally thinking Curly is helping support the#child i mean he is the most well off the bread winner he puts food on the table he is the food! Would polle being Anya talk about how Jimmy#doesnt have it in her to foster a child to support one emotionally without damage? Why so focused on making Curly the idealized male#or provider in her life when she went after him? For female Curly is it envy that she did this to herself and Curly has even more prospects#than her now? What if Anya was fawning because he didn't want the kid but hated the idea of Jimmy killing it to spite him? Or perhaps using#it as a means of control because even if he doesn't want it i doubt he wants it to be punished or abused. It is a burden something no one#wanted but it is being fostered five months in and Jimmys showing a bump and Anya cant ignore all the implications of it being born to her#maybe he kills himself to avoid living in a world its subjected to that pain to to save himself from it. GOD the pills with Curly are worse#for male Anya fem!Curly because its so much more direct he cant shove something down a womans throat who is clearly unwilling it makes#him feel like Jimmy to watch her struggle against him and he cant do it and with Jimmy it is so much more direct about a mother feeding#theri child and abusing it like the nuance if any gender flipping was canon would tear this fandom apart now imma thinking crazy about this#thanks skull anon like really ur asks get me thinking#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#💀 anon#ask#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#captain curly#nurse anya#anya mouthwashing
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geesussss can my brain chill out maybe like at this point people arent even doing anything im pretty sure its just pretending something is off so i can start panicking about if someone hates me and im not enough and they will leave and i am the worst person ever because of this. why. dude. please. nothing happened. why do you even do this. and worse why the fuck do i still believe you every time no matter what
#come on man theyre probabaly like. tired. or stressed. people are a little off sometimes this is normal. what is wrong with you#i cant even tell if anything i think is happening is real at this point are they talking to me less or am i just being more ofa needy bitch#like. i know my brain is probably overreacting but i still believe it for some reason? hard to explain my stuff works wrong and its confusin#i hate this#i feel bad asking for reassurance too#i shouldnt need that i should be able to just beleive people care about me#its not like im not being told that im loved or anything its just that its somehow still not enough#and i get anxious every time i get a text because what if this is finally it maybe they have decided they hate me#maybe i said something wrong?
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Ladd: but why would you kill me when I'm willing to kill for you?? Lass: omg you can't just say you'd kill someone, Ladd. that's murder and it's frowned upon.
(and then Ladd does kill for her but it's fine and part of the job)
#my characters#the two as kids are playing in a park and ladd wanders off and gets uhhh abducted kinda#basically a siren lures him so he goes physically willingly not knowing its a siren singing to him and it leads to his disappearance#for a couple weeks and lass blames herself and when ladd shows back up with no memory of the weeks gone#she just gets so scared and refuses to talk to ladd bc what if she hurts him or gets him hurt#so she goes to therapy for it and then they both get employed at the supernatural bureau of investigations#and then ladd proceeds to be an absolute asshole to everyone without trying hes just really not good at socializing#and so lass and one of the main characters are like... i want to kill ladd so bad hes so annoying#while ladd is like ???????? I AM LITERALLY JUST EXISTING THATS MEAN#then he gets wind of a case the main duo is working on and it feels familiar so he asks to help bc it takes place near where he grew up#and its kids getting abducted and he ends up finding the siren and the memories come back#and so he tells the other two where the kids are most likely bc thats where he was kept#and its just a siren who wanted to be a mom but instead of having her own kids she just lures in kids to take care of#until shes bored and ladd is like ok well that answers a lot and while id love to forgive you and take you in alive#you ruined my sisters childhood and thats something i cant give leniency to#and kills the siren which ends the abductions and then he gets back to work and hugs lass and says nothing about it#and she just writes it off as ladd being weird again cause whatever#anyway thanks they're side characters
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how to get validation without seeming annoying or making it obvious that you need validation to survive. puter do you hear me
#🌀#vent#does he secretly not love me anymore who knows i sure dont#like everything is fine something jsut feels off and i cant put my finger on it#she didnt even do anything for me to think this im just paranoid#like i semi recently had a falling out with a ‘friend’ and its made my trust issues way worse#i cant tell how people feel and it makes me constantly worried about what everyone thinks of me#help
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on that subject, obsessed with today when i was like "hey guys, can you two stop playing the jumping game for now because it's giving caden a headache" and my 6 yr old cousin is like "you mean 'me'. it's giving 'me' a headache, because your caden". it's like yeah man ur right. my bad . and then they stopped jumping. it was awesome
#the thing is like. the jumping hurt my headright away#but i let them do it for a while before they told them to stop. and then they did#and i think thats part of it too. for somw things you have to wait and let kids have whay they want for a while before swooping in and#asking for them to stop#so they dont feel super controlled#and like. as an autistic person I HAVE TO DO THAT ANYWAY USUALLY#there's so many adult people out there who i have to put up witj their noises because i KNOW if i ask for them to stop theyll get mad#or even on a lesser extent. like as an autistic person w my sorta issues. you have to a let a lot of things go that are genuenly painful#and stressful. bc if u ask people to do things too much they often get upset. even if theyre overall nice#same with kids#but with kids you get to ask them to stop way more and you get to ask earlier than you would with most adults#like. ill be trying to put up with somethinf and struggling and get to the ppont where im visibly shaking and stuttering and on the verge#of tears#and the mere request of 'could you turn the tv ofd#still gets whole ass adults telling me im entitled and bossy#meanwhile child will hear 'thats making me feel bad' and theyll hear that and theyll think about it#and often times theyll stop#and even when they dont they dont insult you!#and people still say little kids are annoying????#when i tell a little kid 'could you turn the sound off on the video game or take it to another room the sounds its making are upsetting me#they LISTEN.#adults have a strong tendency to#use the ironicallt imature logic of ' i like this thing. so it dosent matter if it is upsetting you. i like it so i want to have it. even#though we are in a shared space together. i wont change what im doing because i want to do the thing i like. and thats more important than#not upsetting you. because doing the thing i like makes ME feel good.'#like. litterallt this mindset is easily more promient in adults than small children 100% . on god#and its just about the most childish thing ever.#its understandable. but its immature#and with something this simple its silly people cant let that go. its not complex at all. its stop making noise it is hurting me. easy
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time to play a game of "should I go to the doctor's or is my body just being extra silly"
#if anyone with actual confirmed chronic/on-and-off illness (especially anemic ppl) could tell me at what point hospital is a good idea??#because it's bearable#im functioning i guess#but not all that well#and i cant tell if my depression is just having extra intense physical symptoms#or if i have something actually wrong with my body#or did my lack of caring for myself due to depression just push me into a minor basic sickness??#but i have had some issues with low iron and stuff on and off in childhood that was confirmed by a doctor#and this feels kind of similar but worse#so thats why im leaning towards possibly being anemic#anemia#anemic#chronic illness#idk how to tag this im so sorry im just looking for input form people that might know what theyre talking about
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There's multiple ways to self harm that aren't cutting. For example, liking female characters in a fandom that prioritizes the male ones
#og post#yes this abt project sekai#16/20 of the cast are girls#i say this as someone whos fave character is tsukasa#NONE of my other faves get SHIT in this fandom#haruka and mmj are literally so good#if your faves are just all the guys im begging you to pay attention when a girl character speaks#BEING GAY IS NOT AN EXCUSE BTW. IM GAY TOO IF YOU CANT APPRECIATE THE GIRL CHARACTERS CUZ YOURE NOT 'ATTRACTED' TO THEM#YOURE JUST LIKE AN INCEL WHO THINKS EVERY WOMAN IN A GAME HAS TO APPEAL TO THEM#i really dont mean to be mean to the guys i love them but i really hate how people push aside the girls#because 'oh well I'm only attracted to guys :/' or 'gheyre not as gay as the guys' or 'theyre just not interesting '#ALL of which are WRONG#all the characters are interesting and have something to offer and if you just refuse to pay attention to the girls cuz theyre girls-#-idk what to tell you#oh yea#self harm mention#anyways this applies to every fandom so feel free to tag which fandom youre apart of that does this i would love to know#also ik this comes off as super bitchy and i feel kinda bad about it but its so#disheartening yk?
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The way that the sun hits leaves and clouds. I feel like I could watch the colors change forever. If I could slow down for that long.
#i keep forgetting a have a deck now. i can go outside and sit there#im doing that now. sitting in the corner of a deck full of empty chairs. staring up at a big pine tree where the sun is striking it gold#at the top. i like how thr light hits the needles. if the sky was black it would look like its on fire#theres a tree outside my bedroom window too. in the morning. after the sunrises it catches thr light and refelcts the most perfect shade#of green. the kind of green that flutters translucent like youre looking up from the bottom of a pool. the light the light its all about#the sun. everything everything is about the sun. when i start my project I'll be focused on understanding how organisms catch the light bc#its so incredible and complicated it would make my chest swell to bursting if there wasnt an empty bleeding wound in my gut. a#metaphorical wound of course. i dunno. its just difficult bc right now my mood is inflated by hormones. not even that much i think I'm#just at what shoulf be a normal level of happiness so i can be slow for a minute. but just a minute bc i kno it won't last long#sorry i cant shut the fuck up when im like this but i dunno i just feel like i havr to document these ephemeral moments before they're gone#its just difficult when you kno the world is so full of beautiful things but 95% of the time your eyes are too clouded to see it#everyone tells me i work too much but i feel like im just staring off into space being miserable 60% of the time. ive just done so much#damage over the past few years im coming into a new lab as damaged goods. ive got an albatross around my neck in thr form of data i#collected so self destructively that the idea of having anything to do with its publication makes me hate myself. everytime someone tells#me good job on collecting so so so much data it feels like they're congratulating me for breaking something within myself. like i slit my#wrists and bled out on a lab bench and theyre saying good job and theyre excited for me and i have to grin and bear it and pretend im#excited too. but im not bc ive burned everything inside me to ash. so when im elevated enough to be distracted by the clouds and trees it#feels like healing. like seeing angels. beautiful ephemeral beams of light. i wish i could slow down enough to watch them. but now thr sun#is hitting the horizon and the sky is going gradually dark and i should go inside. bc i have many things to do in the morning. so that's#what ill do. and ill try to get more thsn 6hrs of sleep but its hard when your body is vibrating over with energy#but at least i dont feel tired in the morning. something in my head must be on fire#unrelated#hm i should maybe add a tw to this#tw self injury#but its the kind thst makes u good at ur Job. its the kind ppl reward. so they don't understand when u say its destroying ur life#but im trying to get better. i say as i gear up for an insane semester lol but i do mean it
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sometimes i hate everyone and my life and sometimes i think it would be better if i just died at this point
#except for my puppy i love him i always will#i would probably let him gnaw on and mess up my dead body anyway#but either way sometimes i feel like people dont actually care for me and that im just a stupid loser#i could never be like them i could never get as much attention and love and praise as them ever#it hurts because they get it from someone i know too and i just dont know what to do#even if me and them dont talk anymore i know its my fault but i could never talk to them again now#i just dont know whats wrong with me and what im doing wrong and i dont know why im so unlovable#i dont know why im not interesting and i dont know why i dont deserve attention am i really that needy#sorry this is impulsive and im probably going to crash out and go through an episode but i think im sick and its making everything worse#i just want to be known and i want to be somebody or something i could go on and on#im not going to do anything i think but at this point i feel like im so close to doing something for attention#i want people to tell them how much they love me and how much they worry about me i want their praise#i have my puppy for that but hes different because he understands i love him so much you dont understand#im so tired of putting in the effort when nobody has interest in me and wants to know me#im so sick and tired of being needy when i have something perfect already right in front of me i feel so guilty#because he is enough he will always be enough my puppy is always going to be enough he deserves so much better#but then i cant bear the thought of him actually going out to find better i want to spend the rest of my life with him#i want to marry him and i want to work on myself so i can feel the type of love he makes me feel consistently#i want to carve his name into my arm and carve my name into his thigh so we are bonded#i want to be with him forever and even in my death i want him to stay with me and be by me#i want to be buried with him and i would want him to dig up my grave and throw me back when im all rotted#i love him so much you dont understand i know this got off topic but i think somethings wrong with me right now
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