#something about it was so terrifying and i’m not even afraid of spiders

[mita-vittua-olivia]

i told my brother (11) that i listen to tma and that it’s a horror podcast etc. he likes to come into my room in the mornings and today i couldn’t sleep so i was awake when he came in (which usually never happens) and he was so surprised, but then quickly came to the conclusion that it’s because of “that horror podcast”

like yes you’re right but

[brisquad-unit-4402]

rating luxiem and noctyx by how good they would be at taking care of bugs

my name is unit 4402 and i’m typing this on my phone. autocorrect’s suggested emojis are going to go crazy wish me luck

tags: ambiguous relationship, can be read as platonic or romantic, gender neutral reader, fluff, humor, bugs and spiders

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

🖋 Ike Eveland: 4/10

he’s neutral about most bugs. he’ll pick up critters like beetles and caterpillars with his hands and set them outside

gets grossed out by the nastier bugs though. won’t touch ‘em himself, they’re lucky if he can gather himself enough to get a paper and cup. otherwise it’s swatter time with gritted teeth and barely mustered courage

SPIDERS. HOWEVER.

certified spider hater. absolutely terrified of them get out of here!!!

he'll use a swatter, pesticides, everything. but he’s so afraid of how they disappear when he’s not looking

you’ll have to keep an eye on it while he finds the pesticide or vice versa

if he’s unfortunate enough to be the one to kill it you’ll have to hype him up, calm his nerves, and then tell him it’s okay once the deed is done

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🦁 Luca Kaneshiro -100/10

this guy… easily the worst of both units at bug duty. you might just have to take the bullet

he gets sketched out by even the cute ones like butterflies and ladybugs if he looks at them for too long. there’s no way he could even take a moth with a level head

he even reacts to all of them the same. “AAAAH! T-t-there’s a [BUG NAME] in [room name]!”

even so he tries to be nice to them with a cup and paper, or some other method to get them out of his space

unfortunately australian wildlife has prepared him so smaller bugs are still scary but he’ll be a big scared scary mafia boss and take action

and everyone says they’ll leave the house as a joke if they can’t find the spider but it’s luca. there is a solid chance that he will invite you to stay with him in one of the kaneshiro vacation homes for about three days. that’s enough time for the bugs to leave, right?

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

👟 Shu Yamino: 10/10

oh! a bug!

is rather delighted at bug!

honestly if it’s a cool bug he might just take a video of it doing its thing and give it a personality!

he has a out-of-sight, out-of-mind philosophy with bugs. he’s fine with just about anything as long as they aren't annoying

harmful pests will get swatted tho ofc

everything else, he’s fine with bringing outside himself without much fanfare

some of them are a little creepy but he tries to rationalize it. they’re just tiny animals and he’s a big strong sorcerer, it’s fine. what are they gonna do, infest him to death?

…he’s going to spray the house down later just to be sure.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

👹 Vox Akuma: 9/10

a wild card. and also VERY emotionally invested in any bugs that come his way whether that’s good or bad

if they manage to sneak up on him he’ll probably yell “WOAH” or curse out of surprise, then figure out whether he should be scared or not

surprisingly fine with the nastiest of them. he actually loves worms, centipedes and similar critters, and he’ll even admire them if they stumble into his territory

“look reader this is me if i were a worm. would you still love me if i was a worm 🥺” “vox please just get that thing outside”

spiders have a 50-50 survival chance. he’ll kill small spiders but bring the big ones outside because the big ones are like full Animals to him and slaughtering animals is not something he can bring himself to do (tiny ones don’t count)

are scorpions bugs? do they count? either way that’s his one objection. he wouldn’t touch them with a ten foot pole if he had the choice, but if you’re really that scared, then he’ll put on a brave face and hide his fear

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

🎭 Alban Knox: 2/10

if he’s going to take care of a bug you need to make peace with the fact that he will whine the entire time

not a cute fun whine either. he’ll complain the entire time that it’s gross and nasty and ewww yuck ugh!

and that’s just for beetles and caterpillars

show him a spider or something else just as creepy and he will actually scream

and yell as he fumbles around to take care of it

and yell as he eventually grabs it with his hands (he’s panicking a little too hard to get a tool)

and yell as he tries to open the door and throw it outside

this is assuming he doesn’t find a slipper nearby. if he has a tissue or something he’ll smash the bug over and over until it’s pulverized

and he’ll STILL be yelling while he does that

the job gets done but at what cost

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

🐑 Fulgur Ovid: 6/10

he’s not a 6/10 because he dislikes bugs. he’s neutral towards them, not really creeped out by them but not a fan either

he’s a 6/10 because he’s a dick about taking care of them for you

here’s how it usually goes: you summon him to save you from a creepy crawly. he’ll inspect it and go “really, you’re scared of that little thing? look at it closer, it’s just a bug”

and once he quits fooling around he just swipes it up. his fingers are solid steel which allows for Precise Bug Snatching

but he’ll act unsure and go “i think i got it. here, reader, look inside my hand and tell me if you see it”

or even the dreaded move where he pretends he’s bringing the bug closer to you so you have to see it

and THEN once he’s outside he’ll open his hands and go “wait i think i lost it” just to get a rise out of you until he confirms yes, it’s safe and out of the house

if you’re legitimately terrified then he doesn’t even bother with the jokes. just point out the bug and close your eyes, and he’ll be washing his hands while you stare back at a smudge on the wall before you can even get out a sentence

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

🔗 Sonny Brisko: 8/10

somehow both a gentle soul and a complete menace

he's very matter-of-fact when you point them out. "it's just a little jumping spider, no big deal ¯\_(ツ)_/¯"

in fact he's almost adorable with how he quietly talks to the bugs and coaxes them to crawl on his hand so he can get them out of your way

and then he prods and begs you to take a picture of the bug bc it's a cool little guy

surprisingly knowledgeable and can identify bugs easily, so once he's got one in his hands he'll show it to you and tell you some facts about it

which is very sweet except for the fact that it's still a nasty bug and you want it out of your face!

he'll lightly tease you over being so scared of a little bug while he takes them outside. and if it's a pest-eater like a spider he'll hide it in a dark corner out of your sight

overall very kind to bugs and thinks they're friendly

which is why it throws you so hard that sometimes after he coos over them he just FUCKING SMASHES THEM IN HIS PALM?

NO HESITATION AT ALL??

WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM???

also when the bug is taken care of he'll sneak behind you and lightly tap his fingers up your arm like a creepy-crawly and then laugh when you get scared. what a shithead

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

🔮 Uki Violeta: 15/10

the very essence of "i'm not locked in here with you, you're locked in here with ME"

it's like watching a cat hunt an unaware mouse. he's so quick about it

and he's so good at it too?? he'll find the bug, swat it, and throw the remains away in less than a minute on a good day

doesn't even act like it's a big deal either, he just goes back to what he was doing before you asked for help

he uses tissues or shoes on the big ones like roaches, but anything small, he's surprisingly good at crushing them with his bare hands. this is especially funny when he has acrylics on bc those nails never get dirty nor in the way

spiders get the relocation pass, and he'll insist they stay inside, just out of sight

non-zero chance if you complain about it, he'll go on a lecture about how spiders are how you prevent other pests from invading the house

honestly you only see this side of uki once. the bugs are too scared to show their faces after this stint

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

✧. ┊ masterpost ✧. ┊ kofi

[aubreysheadspace]

Hello! This is my first time requesting something like this so I’m a little bit nervous <:3 But anyway can I request the omori faraway gang (including Mari) with a partner who is just in LOVE with snakes. Like they have several snakes at home, both big and small. She knows all these facts about snakes and how to take care of them. Just a reader who absolutely loves sneks :3

MAIN CAST WITH A READER WHO LOVES SNAKES

OMG SNAKES LOOK SO COOL but I’m absolutely terrified of them honestly . THIS REQUEST IS CUTE THOUGH??? hope u enjoy ! (Spoiler alert: they’re all a bit afraid)

this man SUNNY has definitely never seen a snake personally, i mean he has no reason to after all, he lives in a town! either way he’s probably afraid of them without even realizing it

once he visits your room full of snakes.. he doesn’t move from his place. he’s petrified. you might need to help him walk from his spot at the front of your door.

conclusion: he’s never coming over, which sucks but hey, the man’s afraid after all. sure he had a snake give him daily allowance in his HEADSPACE, but that was in his mind!

AUBREY grew up in FARAWAY TOWN, so she also had no experience with a snake. nobody owned a pet snake until you moved into town (last time i checked). she always listened to when you spoke facts about snakes.

it was weird that you knew so much, she clearly didn’t take the hint that you probably owned one. so when she came over one day… let’s just say AUBREY saw the life flash before her eyes. (exaggeration)

conclusion: she was TERRIFIED at first, but of course you let her know your snakes weren’t venomous. at one point she even held a tiny snake in her hands, until she got too frantic and tried to shake it off. she’s also not letting them around her pet BUN-BUN at all, her bunny is not food for your snakes!

BASIL is a fond of all animals just like he is with plants, but snakes and other scarier animals are just.. scary to him. they are fun to read about.. but to actually meet one in person? he’d die from a heart attack for sure.

even thought that’s the case, he loves hearing all about your snake facts! your conversations are like a deal being made. you give snake facts, and in return basil gives you plant facts. it’s a win-win on both ends. so when he finally comes over and meets all of your snakes..

conclusion: he fainted, well almost. he tried to keep it cool but flinched at every one of them that tried to move. eventually he starts calming down and sees that they’re kinda cute! just.. just don’t ask him to feed them with a dead animal or he’ll actually pass out.

while KEL moved to FARAWAY TOWN when he was just a kid, he had grown accustomed to the town and never expected to meet any strange wild animals. if he did, he would totally go, "woah look! a cool looking bear!"

KEL loves when you rant to him about the snake facts you have up your sleeves! he thinks snakes are so cool and awesome, it’s like he doesn’t even think he’s gonna meet any..! until the day you invited him over.

conclusion: give him time to process the many snakes in your room. he’s gonna think they’re so cool! he definitely the type who goes up to one of them in their glass tank and taps the glass to say, "hey little guy!"

HERO is probably a guy who would pass out the minute he sees an wild animal roaming the streets. thankfully he never had to deal with an exotic animal in his life until.. you came along!

he’s a guy who would ask questions about the things a person is interested in, and would allow them to ramble, so of course he does it with you and your wild facts about snakes! when you asked him to come over, he doesn’t mind and happily says yes! i mean, what could go wrong?

conclusion: you might’ve just given him a new fear. spiders are still his number one enemy but snakes might be in his top 20. of course he tries to like them for your sake but.. it’s hard for him when they’re constantly making noises at him like they wanna bite him..

MARI is someone who’s a fan of regular pets like a cat than exotic ones like a snake. she doesn’t judge though, because it’s MARI after all! you can talk to her about anything and she would always listen!

so of course when you talk about snakes with her, she loves all the snake facts you bring to the table. she’ll even surprise you with a snake fact the next day, she researched it in hopes you enjoyed it! even after all this, she never expected you to actually have snakes in your house until the day she came over..

conclusion: she’s very … flinchy around your snakes at first, so you might wanna help her with that. eventually she’ll grow to love your snakes and start to think they’re adorable the more she focuses on their cute face!

[return-of-a-space-cowboy]

🧚‍♀️ Anon

I have spiders on the brain, help (I’m thinking about Driders, lots and LOTS of them) 😭

Drider Johnathan would be so scary, mating season is coming and he’s busy with preparations as he wants everything to be perfect only to be surprised to see a Human! (He’s only ever seen Males) So he begins to quietly stalk until he gets the chance to pounce his next prey!

Only to be surprised that this human is a Woman! (He becomes embarrassed and begins to apologize as he’s never encountered a ‘Young Lady’, showing his gentleman side)

He ignores Darlings struggles as he takes her to his den to make it up to her with some supper and to check to see if he accidentally harmed her (He becomes fascinated by how small and dainty she is compared to him and his kind, as Females are known for being bigger, but he’s an exception since he’s as big as a female *Real Spider Biology, in most species the Females are mainly bigger than the males*)

OR

Darling and Drider Johnathan met when they were children?

Darling got lost in the woods, only to be found by Johnathan (Who was only a bit bigger than her) who wants to help her because he’s trying to become a Gentleman!

Darling was fascinated by his appearance as she’s never met a someone with so many legs! (They’re covered in blue fluff)

Darling and Johnathan became friends during the years, with JoJo getting big and strong as an Ox (Keeping their friendship a secret) as he gifted her many animal pelts during the years as well as offerings of food like meat and berries (As part of a mating ritual)

However when Johnathan learns Darling is engaged and getting married he becomes upset (No doubt thinking she’s being married against her will) so he intends to find the man and get rid of him (Turn him into his dinner) and take Darling away and off into his Burrow (A big cave) where they can start a family together!

I can see Johnathan be a Goliath Birdeater as a Drider (As well as Joseph and Jotaro being Goliath Birdeaters too because of their size)

I’m having another weird idea for a Drider Johnathan or Risotto (I’m picturing Risotto as a Great Huntsman Spider for a Drider)

Oh boy, one thing about. I hate spiders, too many close calls with spiders. And huntsmans, don't even get me started with those bastards who just like to drop right in front of you for no reason.

But I love my monsters!

I can't say much on species as even looking at pictures gives me goosebumps.

Warnings: NSFWish, non con elements, Somnophilia

I like the first idea of him seeing darling in the middle of the forrest. Now I propose a language barrier. He sees that darling has already been injured and takes her back with him. He's trying to calm her down as he takes her back to his den but she doesn't understand a word he's saying and vice versa.

Only when he uses his webbing to close up a big cut does she somewhat understand what's going on. Still she's terrified.

She does through her hiking bag to grab her phone only to find it smashed beyond function. Eventually she offers dried berries to try and gauge his temperament. Unfortunately he takes this as a sign of courtship. He denys them as darling needs them to heal up, but inside he's a giddy mess to have such a cute human propose to him. He's working like crazy on preparing his den for her as well as making sure she's healthy.

Then one night he undresses her and wraps her tightly into his web while she sleeps, something that was customary due to how aggressive female driders could be, not that he was afraid of her hurting him.

He takes his time to trail his hands over her, admiring her form. If any of his kind found out about this he'd be labeled a creep but he didn't care.

[heartfelttickles]

Ticklish Terrors

Note: This is my first ‘long’ fic so I’m aware it’s not amazing haha but I do hope you like it! If there’s anything that can be improved then feel free to let me know, bc I am by no means an expert haha… hope you all have the best day :)

Fandom: Heartstopper

Characters: Nick and Charlie

Words: 1500

Story: Nick and Charlie are watching a movie when Charlie discovers a secret about Nick.

———————————————————————————

It was a cozy, Halloween afternoon at Nick's house. The air was filled with the warmth of a crackling fireplace and the sweet scent of freshly baked pumpkin pie, courtesy of Charlie. Nick and Charlie, sat on the living room couch, enjoying each other's company and intently watching the latest horror movie – Nick gripping Charlie’s hand every time a jump scare happened.

“Oh my gosh, who knew rugby lad Nick Nelson was scared of horror movies?” Charlie jokingly remarked when his boyfriend squeezed his hand for what felt like the hundredth time.

“Hey..” he lowered his voice, still playful, whilst poking Charlie’s side, earning a yelp and a slight giggle “that was uncalled for, there’s no need for this many scares- why couldn’t you let me watch a Marvel movie or something where I don’t feel on edge for 2 hours?’ A slight tinge of red growing on his face.

‘You know I hate Marvel movies and this is just a bit of fun, it’s Halloween of course we have to watch a horror film - it’s an unspoken law.’ Charlie justified his movie choice. Nick simply flinched again when another haunting note was played on the organ.

Nellie, afraid of the loud noises, curled up beside them. “This is just cruel, you’re scaring Nellie now, how dare you terrify my dog’ Nick looked down at Charlie with a cheeky grin as Charlie sassily rolled his eyes.

Nick absentmindedly scratched Nellie behind the ears, and she wagged her tail in bliss. The ‘rugby lad’ shifted his focus back to the movie when Nellie leaned towards his side, her nose sniffing around, in an attempt to find the comfiest place to rest her head. Feeling her nose poking around over his side caused Nick to squirm slightly - his hand flew up to cover his mouth but even that couldn’t stop the muffled giggles from tumbling out of him.

Charlie, never one to miss an opportunity for a good laugh, was quick to notice Nick's amusement. He turned to his boyfriend with a mischievous grin and an eyebrow raised – noticing his lover’s shoulders bouncing up and down with uncontrollable giggles.

"What's got you laughing, Nick?" Charlie asked, his curiosity piqued.

Still chuckling, Nick replied, "I dohont knohow what it ihis, but Nehehellie ihihis snihihiffing mehe. Ihit feheheels so weheheird.’

Charlie's eyes twinkled mischievously as an idea sparked in his mind. Scooting closer to Nick, he playfully wiggled his fingers in the air- Nick’s giggling subtly increasing, which unfortunately for him, Charlie noticed.

"Oh, so you think tickling is funny, huh? Because you’re already giggling more with just my fingers giving near you. I think I’m going to have to test my hypothesis that teasing makes you even more ticklish than usual!" Charlie declared, before pouncing on Nick gently, tickling his sides mercilessly.

Nick immediately burst out into hysterical laughter, squirming and trying to escape Charlie's ticklish assault. His joyful laughter filled the room, echoing off the walls, blending with the crackle of the fire.

‘Aww Nick, does this tickle? Are your sides ticklish?’ He taunted - fingers increasing their speed and exploring every inch of his sides – relishing in the increasing cackles he elicited from his boyfriend. ‘Wow. You’re reacting like this just on your sides when I know you’re more ticklish elsewhere. I wonder what will happen if I just happen to….I don’t know…. Go here?’ Charlie’s devilish fingers spidered into the hollows of Nick’s armpits, drawing out a squeal from the burly lad as he clamped his arms down, thus trapping the notoriously nimble fingers in one of his worst tickle spots.

‘Chahahar stohohop teheasing…. I cahahant…’ is all the older boy could get out as he attempted to thrash himself away from tickles.

‘Aw you’re so adorable like this you know…. But you do realise my hands are trapped here? I would like to have my hands back if that’s okay with you? So be a good boyfriend and lift your arms up for me?’

‘I chahahant – I knohohhow thahaht trihihick’ Nick giggled out, cheeks turning a flushed shade of red.

Charlie simply sighed theatrically. ‘Okay have it your way, I can do this all day, I’ll just stay in your ticklish armpits for eternity.’

After many, many, many attempts, Nick finally mustered the ability to lift his arms enough to release Charlie’s fingers. Charlie finally relented, allowing Nick to catch his breath, but remained on him. Unbeknownst to them, Nicks mom had witnessed the latter of the attack – a grin on her face hearing Nick’s laugh.

‘It’s been a while since I heard you laugh like that Nicky, darling’ she finally broke the silence.

Almost in synchronisation, Charlie’s head whipped around, and Nick’s head popped out from the side of Charlie – juxtaposing expressions of both embarrassment and their residual smiles.

‘Don’t forget Charlie, his inner thighs are his worst spot…’

‘Oh really’ Charlie, grinning back at her before she left, whipped his head back to face his boyfriend and was able to secure himself on Nick’s waist, hands evilly hovering near his thighs, ready to test out this newfound information.

‘Mom you’re such a traitor… Char – Chahar wahahait.’ Nick’s hands shot out trying to push Charlie’s hands away from his thighs, not being able to stop the anticipatory giggles that tumbled out.

‘enjoy the rest of the night darlings.’ She exited the room swiftly - cup of tea in hand, wide smile of joy plastered on her face.

‘I’m dyyying to see this now’ Charlie playfully exclaimed, locking eyes with Nick’s who attempted his classic golden retriever puppy eyes. Any other scenario, Charlie would have caved immediately… not today.

One squeeze was all it took.

‘CHAR- NOHOHO’ An onlooker would have thought he’d been struck by lightning with the intensity of his reaction from one squeeze.

‘Oh…..my….gosh….. you really are adorably ticklish, have I told you?’ Charlie teased, slightly shocked at how ticklish his boyfriend actually was. Without giving Nick a chance to answer he used both hands to squeeze the tenderly, ticklish inner thighs.

‘AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH CHAHAHAHHAHAAR………. NOHOHOHOHO’ Nick positively screamed, head thrown back, back arched, legs violently kicking and thrashing from side to side to escape the ticklish torment from his lover.

‘Aw nick, tickle tickle tickle’ Charlie cooed. Another squeal escaped Nick.

‘The teases definitely make you more ticklish…. Somehow that’s possible… does this tickle sweetheart? Tickle…. Tickle… tickle….’ Charlie enunciated every ‘tickle’ that he spoke with alternating squeezes on his thighs, tears of laughter forming in Nick’s eyes.

He finally let up once Nick’s laughter turned silent. Red faced and breathless yet still giggling with a wide smile on his face – still looking at his tickler boyfriend with the adoration he’s had for him since their first meeting.

Charlie sat next to nick once again, rather proud of his playful victory of proving his hypothesis right.

‘I think you’re the most ticklish person I’ve ever met Nicholas Nelson’ a mischievous glint in his eye as he teased his red-faced boyfriend.

‘You sure about that?’ Nick questioned, his playful energy surging back to him. ‘So it seems tickling is the weapon of choice today then, huh?’ He paused, waiting for Charlie's response.

Charlie's expression shifted, realising he had fallen into a classic trap. "Oh no, what have I done?" he exclaimed dramatically, pretending to gasp.

Without giving Charlie any time to react, Nick lunged forward, expertly targeting Charlie's ticklish spots. His nimble fingers danced across Charlie's ribs, and Charlie erupted into laughter squirming and wriggling, gradually slipping further and further down the couch.

‘NIHIHICK STOHOHOP’ Charlie cackled.

The room filled with the joyful sounds of their laughter, mingling with Nellie's barks of excitement as she joined in the fun. Nick couldn't help but laugh along with Charlie, feeling their bond grow even stronger with every ticklish retaliation.

‘Come on Nellie, you tickled me, now it’s time to help tickle Charlie’ Nick playfully exclaimed to the cheery dog, who simply licked Charlie’s face and settled beside him.

After another few minutes, Nick finally stopped tickling Charlie, both boys left breathless and feeling an indescribable joy radiating between them. They sat back on the couch, leaning against each other, recovering from the tickle-induced euphoria.

‘ I think we've had enough tickles for one day, we still have a movie to watch’ Charlie said, grinning widely.

Both lads locked eyes on the TV only to find the credits rolling in the movie – much to Nick’s delight. Unable to control his smugness of not having to watch the horror movie, Nick glanced at Charlie. Almost telepathically, their hands attracted each other into a tight hold – maintaining their eye contact of admiration and affection - when they both softly uttered the words ‘I love you’ followed by the most endearing of smiles from both lads. A passionate kiss sealed their phrase, followed by Nick’s choice of romantic movie.

As they sat there watching the new movie, the room enveloped in a cozy silence, Nick and Charlie relished in the warmth of their relationship. Laughing together, sharing playful moments, and creating memories like these reminded them that this is the love they both deserve.

[halfmoth-halfman]

la douleur exquise

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x GN!Spider!Reader Word Count: 2.6k Warnings: canon-typical violence, fluff, whump, slight body horror

It isn’t easy being one of Miguel’s best agents. He’s a hard man to impress and even harder to get close to, but somehow you’ve managed to do both.

You take pride in your friendship with Miguel; it’s not something easily accomplished and more often, a feat people are too afraid to try for. You get it, he can be intimidating, but you’ve gotten a glimpse beneath that rough exterior. He isn’t some terrifying monster waiting to attack at any given moment.

If he was a monster, he wouldn’t take time out of his day to make sure you eat three meals a day.

He wouldn’t ask for your advice on handling anomalies, much less listen as intently as he does.

He wouldn’t let you literally hang around his office and annoy him to no end during your downtime.

You know Miguel’s a good man. Is he a little too stern with the others? Yes. Does he take his job too seriously sometimes? Also yes. But you couldn’t imagine you’d be any other way if you were in his position.

He’s a good boss and a good friend—quite possibly your best friend—someone you trust with your life, and you’re about ninety-eight percent sure he feels the same about you. At least, you hope so. It’s that, or you’ve suddenly become really bad at reading people.

“Widow, come in.”

Speak of the Devil.

“If it isn’t my favorite boss,” you smile, looking down at your watch just in time to see Miguel roll his eyes.

“I’m your only boss.”

“Still my favorite,” you laugh. “What’s up?”

“I need you to meet up with Jess. Lyla—”

“Oh, wait, let me guess! Lyla detected another anomaly, and you need your best spider-person to get the job?”

Miguel doesn’t even look at you, too busy with whatever’s on his monitors, as he lazily shrugs, “Yes, actually—”

“Wait, really?”

“—But he’s stuck on Earth-13122, so you’ll have to do.”

“I walked right into that one, didn’t I?” you sigh, smile still playing at your lips. You catch the quirk of his lips, the tight swallow as he fights down a laugh.

It’s a shame; he has such a nice smile.

“Jess will fill you in on the details,” Miguel continues, back to business as usual.

“No problem, boss.“ Giving a mock salute, Miguel disappears, and you’re left gazing longingly after his visage. A small sigh escapes you, heart aching at his absence.

So, maybe Miguel isn’t just your best friend. Perhaps you’d like him to be something more, but you’ve been holding on to that hope for years with no indication that his feelings for you run deeper than platonic. It hurts having to deal with that fond pinch of your heart every time you see him, but you’ve resigned to dealing with it.

“You done pining yet, or do you need another minute?”

You damn near jump out of your skin at Jess’s voice, whirling around to come face-to-face with her.

“Oh hey, Jess! I didn’t see you there.” You try to laugh it off, looking everywhere but the woman smirking at you.

“Sure,” she teases. “You were too busy making eyes at—“

“Miguel said something about an anomaly?” you cut her off quickly. She gives you one last look that says you’ll definitely be talking about this later before shifting into business mode.

“We got a report about an unusually strong anomaly,” Jess explains, tapping away on her watch. “Due to the conditions of the universe he’s stuck in, Miguel thought you’d be the best for the job.”

A swirl of inter-dimensional orange mixes with the lush tropics of your universe’s floating islands behind her.

“He…did?” you ask with a tilt of your head.

“His exact words were, and I quote, There’s no one better suited for the job. He asked me to come along to help you.”

“No, he didn’t,” you scoff. It isn’t unusual for you to be one of the first ones called to deal with anomalies, but it’s certainly not normal for you to take point.

“You can ask Lyla,” Jess shrugs as the portal blinks opens.

“Why? What’s up with this universe that I’m needed, specifically?”

Jess’s mouth quirks into a knowing grin, waving you over with one foot in the portal.

“You’ll see.”

“I thought you said it was one anomaly!” you scream at Jess, tucking and rolling down another massive sand dune to dodge an incoming swing from the amalgamation of muscles, tendons, and cybernetics that make up the anomalous Lizard.

“There was!” Jess shouts back, kicking off the undead Electro, who looks a little too much like an oversized Frankenstein’s Monster for you to take him seriously.

“Obviously not!” you huff. The unforgiving sun bears down on the four of you, the golden light of this universe’s eternal sunset reflecting off the molten sand. The grains scratch at your suit, visible heat waves rolling over the endless desert.

You duck from another swing of The Cyber-Lizard’s tail, sliding across the sand as he gives chase. You can see the heated sand pulling the moisture from his skin every time he touches it, the coarse epidermis cracking and splitting open.

Miguel was right about one thing, you think. The burning sunset colors of your suit shift with the sands, your skin absorbing every heatwave that rolls by to energize you. There really was no one better suited for the job.

The next time Cyper-Lizard leaps for you, you turn and run, trying to get closer to Jess and the Zombie-Electro. She holds her own well enough—you’d expect nothing less—despite having to abandon her bike to the difficult terrain of this universe.

“Jess, get down!” you shout, sliding down a sand dune toward her. She crouches down, and you launch yourself off the dune, soaring over her.

Zombie-Electro takes the opportunity to attack, one arm extending with a horrendous groan. The jagged bolts of electricity keeping him hovering in the air spark and stretch up his stitched-together body, preparing to launch from his hand.

You beat him to the punch, shooting a web that blocks his hand as you collide with him mid-air. He groans and swats at you, but you’re too quick, attaching to webbing on his hand and crawling around the length of his body.

You’re a chaotic blur of sticky silk, oranges, and reds, webs shooting from every direction as you wrap Zombie-Electro into a massive cocoon, trailing webs around him and shooting off the sticky fibers to tether him to the sandy ground.

Using his head as a springboard, you launch off of him, landing gracefully next to Jess.

“Not bad,” she laughs, staring up at your makeshift monument to watch your webs solidify.

“All in a day’s—“

“Move!”

The blunt force hits you first, the searing pain of heated metal sinking in a second later as Cyber-Lizard’s tail slams into your torso and launches you into the air.

You hear Jess shouting, and your watch beeps. The sand sparkles, a flash of orange across the ocean of molten gold beneath you, and something pulls you out of the air.

You land at the base of your Zombie-Electro tower, or rather Miguel lands with you held firmly in his arms.

“Oh hey, boss,” you say airily. “Fancy seeing you here.”

Though you can’t see his face, he groans, and you know he’s rolling his eyes. Miguel sets you on your feet, waiting an extra second to make sure you can stand on your own.

Pain blossoms across your torso, but your suit works fast to absorb the heat from Cyber-Lizard’s tail and use it to relax your muscles.

“I’m good, promise,” you wheeze, leaning against one of your web pillars. “Go help Jess.”

“Stay here,” Miguel commands before taking off.

“Yeah, no problem,” you nod, waiting until he’s joined the fight to slide to the ground and collapse against your webbing. “I’ll just hang here with my new friend.”

Zombie-Electro groans, a slight shock of electricity traveling down your webs to zap your shoulder.

Your peace doesn’t last long, a massive roar—more the sound of metal screeching against shredded vocal cords—echoing across the dunes. You barely have time to react, getting to your feet—ribs screaming at you in protest—just as Miguel and Jess come flying toward you.

Jess recovers easily, bracing herself and sliding across the sand to stop on your left, while Miguel collides with the harsh structure of your webs on your right.

“Welcome back,” you laugh, holding a hand out to Miguel. He takes it with a huff, using your body as an anchor to jump to his feet. “Think we should call for back—“

“No,” Miguel snaps, and you exchange a look with Jess.

“Miguel—“ You step forward, reaching out to him, but pain shoots up your ribs, knees buckling. They’re quick to catch you, Miguel wrapping an arm around you to keep you upright, and Jess keeping your head from hitting the web-scaffolding.

“We should—“

The familiar shiver crawls up your spine, settling into your brain, the chittering hiss echoing in your mind.

You react a split second before Jess can, the surge of adrenaline giving you the added strength to shove Jess and Miguel away from you as Cyber-Lizard’s claws tear into your back.

You react on pure instinct and survival.

Both hands braced against your web scaffolding, your suit expels all its collected heat in a massive blast. Cyber-Lizard roars as the heat hits the alloy of his cybernetics, the metal already beginning to melt.

He stumbles, but the base of your webs liquify under your touch, and you use the tacky silk to pull him into you just as the entire scaffolding collapses.

Everything feels…heavy.

Distant.

A constant ebb and flow of consciousness like you’re trapped underwater, waves crashing over you whenever you break the surface.

You’re awake, but you aren’t; still present in your body, aware of your surroundings, but unable to move or react.

You hear people talking around you, sometimes quietly, sometimes urgent. There’s beeping and whirring and occasionally the phantom pain of something pinching into your arm.

It all settles into quiet, and you’re left with your scattered thoughts and a gentle pressure in the palm of your right hand.

Thirst is the first thing to hit you when you wake up.

Your throat’s too dry to make noise, but your eyes peel open and instantly move to take note of your surroundings.

You’re back at HQ, lying in the infirmary without your mask.

Guess the anomalies were taken care of.

You feel the dull ache across your body, and you’re sure you have a collection of bruises and bumps to take care of. You can already feel the heat of your suit encasing your skin and working to help you heal. You wiggle your toes, roll your shoulders, then flex your hands. Everything’s working fine, except…

You flex your right hand again, feeling that same solid pressure in your palm. You squeeze, putting as much strength as you can muster into it.

What is—

“Stop it.”

Your head snaps to the right, ignoring the pain that shoots down your neck. Miguel sits in a chair beside your bed, eyes shut with one arm crossed over his chest and the other…

You turn your hand, fingers lacing through his as you squeeze again, far more gently this time.

He opens his eyes, peering down at you with his best stern look. It’s hard to take him seriously when he looks so tired, with deep bags under his bloodshot and swollen eyes, and stress lines more prominent.

“You look like shit.” You rasp out a laugh. Miguel raises an unamused brow, giving you a blatant once over as if to say have you seen yourself. You roll your eyes, carefully turning your head back to look at the ceiling.

“Did you catch—”

“Yes.”

“Is Jess oka—”

“Yes.”

“You’re mad at me.”

“Furious.”

You nod, eyes sliding shut as you wait for the inevitable lecture. You wait a few seconds, then ten, then thirty. When Miguel doesn’t speak after a minute, you chance another glance at him to find him staring down at your linked hands with a look of blatant worry on his face.

“I’m okay,” you say softly, thumb running hesitantly across the back of his hand.

This is uncharted territory for you. Of course, he’s been worried about you before, but nothing more than asking if you were hurt after a mission.

He says it so quietly you almost don’t hear him.

“You flat-lined.”

Oh.

“I’m sorry.” It’s the only thing you can think to say. Miguel scoffs out a laugh, turning to look at you with a shocked expression.

“You’re apologizing? For almost dying?” he asks in pure disbelief. You shrug, eyes focused on the ceiling. He shakes his head, muttering something to himself that you don’t catch.

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to say,” you mumble. Miguel sighs, hand sliding out of your grip—you already miss the warmth—as he leans back from you. A hurricane of emotions swirls inside you: shame, embarrassment, anger, heartache.

You could accept him being mad, but the least he could do was thank you for saving his life.

Your bed dips, and suddenly Miguel is hovering over you, large hands cradling your face and claws gently scratching against your temples.

Your mind goes blank, unable to look away from the intensity of his earthy brown gaze.

“You’re supposed to say, I’ll be more careful next time, Miguel,” he says, stern and low.

“I’ll be more careful next time, Miguel,” you repeat, blinking up at him.

He leans closer, voice soft, “I won’t put myself in harm’s way again, Miguel.”

“I won’t put myself in harm’s way again, Miguel.”

He leans closer again, inches away from your face.

“I promise to never leave you, Miguel.”

Your breath hitches, and you bring your hands up to lightly caress his. You know what he's gone through, the things that he's lost, the distance he's put between himself and any sort of real connection. It had been one of your main reasons for keeping your feelings to yourself, content to treasure your friendship.

You never imagined that he pictured you as anything more.

“Miguel—” he stills at the sound of your voice, “—I promise to never leave you.”

You barely get the words out before his mouth is on yours, years' worth of swallowed feelings and tension pouring out.

If this is a dream, you never want to wake up.

Miguel pulls away first, pressing his forehead to yours with a long exhale. “You know you’re not going on any missions for a while, right?”

“I could use a vacation,” you laugh, leaning up for another peck on his lips. “Spend some time with my favorite boss.”

He shakes his head, looking down at you with nothing but unfiltered affection. He kisses you again, quick and chaste, before leaning up to kiss your head, lips murmuring against your skin, “Get some rest.”

You nod, and he pulls away, standing from the bed. You expect him to leave, to head back to his office, but instead, he takes the seat next to the bed and leans back.

He works from his watch while you nod in and out of sleep. Exhaustion finally catches up with you, and the last thing you see is Lyla appearing on his shoulder with a wide, teasing grin, laughing, “About time.”

some spider facts!

✧ reader is based on the noble false widow spider, more specifically, the genus Steatoda Nobilis!

“Oh hey, Jess! I didn’t see you there.” You try to laugh it off, looking everywhere but the woman smirking at you.

✧ false widow spiders are known to have poor eyesight!

A swirl of inter-dimensional orange mixes with the lush tropics of your universe’s floating islands behind her.

✧ false widows were originally found in warm, tropic areas before spreading across the united kingdom and the us! they are also known to be ambush hunters, often going after flying prey from high up!

Miguel was right about one thing, you think. The burning sunset colors of your suit shift with the sands, your skin absorbing every heatwave that rolls by to energize you. There really was no one better suited for the job.

✧ false widows are often a combination of burnt red and orange colors, and can survive and thrive in extremely dry and hot areas without water!

You’re a chaotic blur of sticky silk, oranges, and reds, webs shooting from every direction as you wrap Zombie-Electro into a massive cocoon, trailing webs around him and shooting off the sticky fibers to tether him to the sandy ground.

✧ false widows often use the "attack wrap" against prey where their silk is quickly wrapped tightly around their victim

“Not bad,” she laughs, staring up at your makeshift monument to watch your webs solidify. *

✧ false widow cobwebs are similar to sticky fibers, while their scaffold silk is exceptionally strong! i embellished here a little to make reader's webs able to transfer between the two as they need it!

[still-breathing-au-p3r]

It’s not like he meant to eavesdrop. You can’t even really call it eavesdropping if they were talking right out in the lounge where there are always people, can you?

He hadn’t said anything last night, or all day today, because he’d been hoping that talking with Amada about it would get Minato to go to the hospital on his own. Since they didn't have school today, it'd be the perfect opportunity, too.

He didn’t. Junpei did, along with Fuuka and Yuka-tan. Sanada-san had come by later just like he always did, and he’d still been there when the rest of them had left. Minato never showed up, and he hadn’t been at the dorm when they’d gotten back.

Junpei’s set himself up in the second-floor lounge with a volume of a manga series he’d been meaning to get around to, but he’s basically just flipping through the pages instead of really reading it. The more he thinks about it, the more it pisses him off.

He thought Minato and Aragaki-san were tight– Minato’d always seemed to be hanging around him, helping him cook or garden or walk Koromaru or whatever. They spent so much time together in September that one would think they were as close as him and Sanada-san. Aragaki-san had apparently even talked about how sick he was to Minato, so he must have trusted him– even if he had left out the part about why he was sick.

Was that why? Could Minato really be that pissed that Aragaki-san had lied to him? He can understand being angry, but that’s a really stupid reason to just throw away a whole entire friendship like that. And it’s not like anyone else in S.E.E.S. is all that good at being truthful anyway. Hell, even Kirijo-senpai had lied to them for a while! 

But Minato hadn’t seemed bothered at all when Kirijo-senpai eventually spilled the beans. He didn’t seem bothered about a lot of things, actually.

Why is this so different? Or was it just another reason entirely? Whatever the big damn issue is, Junpei vows to get to the bottom of it.

So, when Junpei sees Minato try and slink past towards his room, he snaps the manga volume shut and goes after him.

Minato turns only halfway towards him, and he looks at the knob on his bedroom door instead of Junpei.

“Of course I care.” 

Minato’s face barely looks different than it always does and he’s not even any louder than normal, but Junpei still takes half a startled step backwards because there’s more feeling in his voice right now than Junpei’s ever heard before and it’s– kinda alarming? Even in the middle of a fight with shadows, Minato’s never sounded this fired up.

“I’m too scared to go,” he says. He almost sounds like his normal ‘nothing’s ever bothered me in my life’ self again, but with something off about it. Like he’s hanging on for dear life and still slipping anyway.

“Scared?” Junpei asks. “You?” Minato doesn’t get scared of things. Not even when he really should be.

Minato replies with a slow, barely visible nod. “In the alley, when we were waiting for the Dark Hour to be over so we could call for help? That was the most terrified I’ve ever been since– In a long time,” he says after a tense minute of silence. “But then seeing Aragaki-senpai like that– hooked up to all those machines… It was worse.” 

His grip tightens ever so slightly on the doorknob and it rattles, because his hand’s started shaking a little. “It reminded me of– of–”

Minato trails off, and Junpei gets the feeling he’s probably never going to get the end of that sentence. For once, his permanently neutral expression has shifted into something Junpei can almost call horror. His eyes are kind of glassy and Junpei suddenly wonders if he’s about to faint and if he’ll have to try and catch him. “I want to go, but I can’t. I can’t do it.” 

Shit, man. This is the most he’s ever heard Minato talk at once, and of course it took something terrible. Whatever it is that’s got Minato like this, it’s the kind of afraid that runs a lot deeper than just ‘oh I’m scared of spiders’ or even ‘oh I’m scared of hospitals.’

He still doesn’t like it, and he still kind of wishes that Minato would nut up for their senpai’s sake, but he also does get it. And he knows that pushing about something that’s apparently this serious would be a dick move.

“Okay,” he says. Minato doesn’t react. “Um. I’m sorry man.” Minato still doesn’t react. “For. Y’know. Getting so heated without even talking to you about it. And for sayin’ you didn’t care about Aragaki-san.”

“It’s fine,” Minato says to the doorknob. Junpei isn’t sure if he actually means it or if he’s just saying it because that’s what you’re supposed to say after an apology. He thinks Minato isn’t really sure either. “…Anyway. Night.”

He finally pushes his way inside his room without another word. Junpei winces when he hears the click of the lock. 

Okay.

Yeah, he deserved that. 

He’ll definitely have to think of a way to make up for being such an ass.

[karniss-bg3]

So, I don’t mean this in a request way, bc I know those are closed, but I had a daydream where Tav is TERRIFIED of regular spiders of all sizes. They struggled really badly with the phase matriarch and the spiders in the goblin camp. But Kar’niss doesn’t spook them one bit!

So I imagined the group walking down the road and suddenly there’s a tarantula sized spider that crosses the path and Tav screams and dives underneath Kar’niss to be caged under his legs.

And everyone else laughs at the reaction, but Kar’niss is so confused????? Like “True soul, we are a DRIDER, and you are not afraid of us. Why do you hide from a small spider?” “KAR’NISS I TRUST YOU, NOT THAT SPIDER!”

Bonus: to speak to Tav he leans forward with his drow torso and looks at them upside down so he look really silly.

This scenario applies to a good portion of the Kar’niss fandom in general. I can’t count how many “Kar’niss has cured my arachnophobia” posts I’ve seen but I’m not mad about it. I suppose it helps when a humanoid is attached to the creature we find creepy or frightening. They can talk back and communicate their intentions. Spiders are a bit more...unpredictable.

I’ve never considered myself arachnophobic but Kar’niss definitely elevated my interest in spiders ten fold. I feel I have a better understanding of them now than I ever would’ve and I’ve come to appreciate nature’s pest control. I’ve fallen down a rabbit hole of watching jumping spider videos and I’ve become obsessed. I’ve even contemplated getting one as a pet but two things have stopped me from having a fuzzy friend.

1) I have a cat and if the little guy ever escapes she will activate murder mode and that’ll be the end of itsy bitsy’s whole career.

2) Jumping spiders tend to live one to two years on average. I don’t think I am emotionally equipped to handle that loss with such frequency. I’d become a blubbering, inconsolable mess for days on end mourning the eight legged pal I spent years bonding with. No can do.

I could imagine Kar’niss being perplexed by Tav’s fear of spiders for two reasons. One being the aforementioned situation that they are hanging around a drider willy nilly no problem. The second, Kar’niss comes from a society that worships and pampers spiders. To him they are as normal as dogs and cats are to us.

“True Soul, why do you fear the spider but not us?”

“The spider might bite me but you wouldn’t.”

“Erm—how much do you know about driders?”

Cue the bosom buddies to lovers story arc. Kar’niss learns to love himself and Tav discovers that spider bites aren’t as bad as they once thought. *wink wink*

Also the mental image of Tav getting sent to spider leg jail anytime they did something stupid does amuse me. Considering most of the Tav’s I make are classic himbo types they may as well situate their sleeping bag under him and get comfortable. Yet another moment where I wish I learned to draw.

Thanks for the ask!

[deathmetalunicorn1]

Wonder how Buddha, Shiva, Hades, and Qin Ham Shi would react to a human fighter that uses their opponents fear against them? Totally won't be making an oc that does that nope

-You had been ‘blessed’ with a unique ability, the ability to project other’s fears back onto them.

-You used this ability to your advantage, taking out cruel and evil people when you were on earth, many calling you a vigilante or a hero, but many called you a monster for using fear.

-In Valhalla, you didn’t use your ability often, as you had no reason to, but it was always there, just in case you did.

-That all changed when Ragnarok came around, and Brunnhilde wanted you to fight for humanity. While uneasy about it at first, you agreed, planning on using your ability only once, so you wouldn’t put your opponent through any unneeded psychological abuse.

-Looking into his eyes, after removing your aviator sunglasses, you were instantly able to know his fear and your form shaped, your body being covered in shadows before you emerged as a giant (icky, nasty, disgusting, hairy, yucky) spider.

-The girly shriek that left your opponent was almost comical as he tried to run from you and with one well-placed kick with one of your eight legs, you were announced the winner of the shortest match in the tournament.

-Many of the gods were mad at your ability, finding it unfair, while many of them had been using their own abilities against opponents.

-You returned backstage and your eyes lit up and you ran over, leaping into the arms of your lover who hugged you back, a chuckle leaving him, as he knew you were going to win your match.

-Buddha- He grinned as you made it back to his private room, “So what was it like having that many legs?” you snorted softly in laughter before giving him a grin, falling onto his sofa and he crawled on top, resting his head on your chest, “Weird, but it’s not the first time I’ve been a spider.” He shivered in disgust, not liking them either which made you grin. Buddha knows you would never use it on someone who wasn’t attacking you, you had only used your ability once or twice in Valhalla, when someone tried to kill you, one was a stalker of Buddha, pissed that you were dating him, and you scared the bejesus out of her, and the other claimed you weren’t a strong person and didn’t deserve to live. You played with his hair, taking it out of his bun which he scowled at, as his bun is rather hard to put up, before he melted into you, cuddling you close.

-Shiva- Once in his private room you beamed and ran over, leaping into the pillow pile with his three wives who were instantly smothering you with affection before Shiva joined the cuddle pile, resting his head on your lap. Parvati was leaning against your arm, “Your match was over so quickly! But I’m glad you’re not hurt!” you thanked her, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek before Durga spoke, “Can you control the size of whatever you turn into?” you shook your head, “Nope, I turn into whatever will scare people the most, so if it’s a spider, I’ll be the biggest spider I can!” Shiva laughed warmly, cupping your cheek tenderly, “And you were pretty terrifying!” you threw your hands up in a cheer, making them all laugh, finding it funny.

-Hades- He knew he had nothing to be afraid of from you, as you didn’t use your ability willy-nilly, like to get your way or something like that, you only used it when fighting serious opponents or threats. Hades knew this and knew you could be terrifying when you wanted to be, not so much from what you change into, but more along the lines that no matter who it is, even him, you can tell what they’re afraid of. You have so much blackmail, so much power, knowing people’s hidden fears, but you choose not to use it. Hades let you sit on his lap, turning him into your throne, cuddling up to him as you pouted, “My match ended too quickly!” he boomed with laughter, patting your head, “That’s what you get when you use your ability straight off the bat.” Your pout deepened, but then lessened after he pecked your cheek.

-Qin Shi Huang- Had a feast waiting for you, all the food still piping hot since your match literally was only about a minute long, most of it being taken up by your transformation. He sat you down on his lap, celebrating your win by feeding you, telling you what all the dishes were, since you had trouble sometimes with Chinese food, telling what is what. Zheng knows you would never use your ability for evil, which you easily could do and that honestly scares him as you would be unstoppable, but finds it relaxing that you don’t, giving him a small sense of relief. He couldn’t lie to himself, if he had such an ability, he would be using it to his advantage anytime and anywhere he could, grinning as he believed himself to be a super villain, but that’s why he’s happy you have it and not him.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Holy crap I’m loving your writing! Im especially obsessed with Ken and the ranch owner

I’m wondering if you’d be willing to do an fem human reader x Ken where the reader gets a bit sick, nothing too serious but Ken absolutely freaks out and thinks the reader is dying or sum (he learned about death from Stero Barbie. Also spiders. He’s terrified of both) and the reader thinks it’s a bit funny so she’s like “yeah I’m dying” but then he gives her the most terrified and sad kicked puppy look and she has to explain that it’s just a cold lol

Awh thank you!! Im glad that ppl still love my barbie movie stuff even though barbie summer has come and gone 💔

........

There were only two things that Ken feared after beginning his new life in the Real World:

One is the mortality of humans, as Barbie told him all about how fragile their lives were and the two paths they were given: either growing old and dying peacefully in their beds, or some terrible occurrence cutting it short long before their time on this earth was up.

The second was spiders.

He especially hated the spiders.

You only recently discovered he had that fear after finding one of those 8-legged critters in your house--or more specifically in his room, where he came barreling out from as though he accidentally set something on fire.

At first, you thought he really did start a fire until he dragged you back into there, begging you to get rid of the "strange beast".

You had no clue what he could possibly be referring to....and then he pointed to the corner, where a little cellar spider sat completely unbothered, weaving its web.

In that moment, you realized you may have turned him arachnophobic, considering you did show him one insect-themed horror movie this past Halloween. He kept freaking out over it potentially growing horse-sized or injecting venom into his bloodstream when he was asleep.

But despite you assuring him neither of those things could happen (and insisting that the spider was more afraid of him), Ken refused to go into the room until it was gone.

You find it hard to fathom that this same doll who led an entire revolt, came to terms with his own identity crisis, and bravely made the transition to humanity....was totally inconsolable in the presence of a tiny bug.

Then again, maybe showing him that movie--and allowing Barbie to explain why arachnophobia was among the top fears humans had--was a huge mistake.

Regardless, you made it your mission to get rid of the critter.

Oddly enough Ken insisted that you didn't actually kill it, but you found you it sweet that he valued its life despite it scaring the shit out of him. So you contained it in a cup, putting a napkin underneath it before releasing it outside.

After that, you mentioned how most people usually killed spiders and other pests that invaded their home.

He looked wildly uncomfortable at that fact, before he began talking about some rather... concerning things: like if the spider knew how short its lifespan was, how easily it could have been crushed, if it feared death or if it was even aware of it at all-

Before he could derail and start rambling about death itself too much, you stopped him, asking if he was feeling alright.

And he went quiet for a moment, before smiling and giving you a kiss, reassuring you he felt better.

Yet even as he left the room, he still appeared awful tense.

It was that day where you worried that it's more than just spiders he feared..

.......

"Babe, what's wrong? Are you sick??"

"...unfortunately, but it's nothing serious. Just a stupid cold I caught at work." Sighing tiredly, you sat up in bed, seeing Ken walk into the room.

He looked nothing short of horrified at how drained and exhausted you sounded this morning. "A-Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I don't want you to catch anything, so I'm sorry...but no kisses today."

"Then..what about tomorrow?"

You just rolled your eyes, drinking some tea you made for yourself. "Maybe, but we'll see if I wake up."

Although it was meant to be a little joke, your foggy brain forgot how seriously the blond often took jokes, and he rushed to your bedside, kneeling down.

His eyes were wide as he took your hand. "If you wake up??? Are you dying??"

Putting down your mug, you sighed once more, trying to figure out a way to remedy this situation before you upset him too much. "No....I mean I just feel like I'm dying, but.." You paused, noticing the tears coming to his eyes. "Ken?"

Now that he was a lot closer, you could see the utterly terrified look on his face--as though you kicked a puppy right in front of him.

Yep, it was already much too late. He was upset.

"I-I know tomorrow is not guaranteed for anyone, but you have to get through this, [y/n]! Please..I can't lose you, too...not when you've done so much to help me." He was extremely close to crying, his lips trembling.

Your heart sunk as you placed a hand ober his own. "Oh honey, I was only kidding around when I say-"

"Why do humans joke about death so much? Don't they know y-you...you can't come back? That they have such short lives?? O-Or sure, some believe you can be reincarnated but that doesn't make it any-"

At this point, he was just blubbering nonsense, so you took him into your arms. And for a moment he fell silent, before burying his face into your chest, trying to calm himself down. "I-I'm sorry.."

"No, no..I'm sorry. You're right..I shouldn't be joking about death around you." Frowning slightly, you stroked his hair. "I promise I'm not dying. Not today, or tomorrow..not for a long, long time. This cold will pass and I'll feel better soon enough."

".....a-are these the irrepressible thoughts of death Barbie had?"

'Oh.'

It finally hit you.

He was going through the same thing she once did.

"Ken.." You had him sit up so you could see his face. Aside from it being a little red and his eyes puffy and watery, there were tear marks trailing down to the stubble that had formed along his jaw and chin. "Why didn't you tell me you were having those thoughts?"

Sniffling, he just shrugged. "I don't know. And... I don't know why I'm thinking them. Barbie could blame it on somebody who was playing with her, but...I can't. Because I'm not a doll anymore, I'm human....a-and...those were my thoughts alone." He shuddered, terrified at that realization. "I guess I just..didn't wanna scare you, b-but obviously it's too late for that..."

A small chuckle came from him, although it dissolved into a small sob as he wiped his eyes. "S-Sorry, I....I want these thoughts to just pass already."

"And they will." You nodded, squeezing his free hand reassuringly. "It looks like you're just experiencing them for the first time, and that's okay. They won't be all you think about. And you don't have to apologize for how you're feeling, as long as you're honest with me."

"Th-Thank you.." He sniffled. "I should be taking care of you, not the other way around. Do you need you anything? More tea? Meds? Anything at all?"

You smiled fondly, leaning forward to kiss him on the forehead. "You're all I need right now, sweetheart."

That response seemed to bring Ken's giddy old self back, as he smiled bashfully in return. He melted back into your arms when you wrapped them around him, and he listened to your heartbeat: the only assurance he needed that you were still living.

Eventually...those thoughts of death did pass him by, and he felt okay again.

[thompsborn]

i wish that i was homeward bound

chapter 17 - do the things that i'm afraid to do

It feels kind of like whiplash.

That’s the only way that Peter can think of to explain the past few weeks. Not because they’ve been insanely eventful—at least, not by his standards of eventful—but because it feels like the energy is drastically shifting on an hour-by-hour basis. Maybe it’s just the inside of his head that’s constantly whipping around at break-neck speeds. At this point, he’s used to shit being up in the air, but still. This is some uncharted territory.

The most familiar thing is the guilt. He’s been familiar with the taste of it on the back of his tongue for as long as he can remember, often wonders how he isn’t choking on it every time he breathes, but it’s been particularly bitter recently. Every time Gwen talks about his investigation, every time Harley mentions Spider-Man—every time he’s reminded of the fact that they’re involved, that he’s failed at keeping them out of it, that there’s no way to go back and make it so that things were different.

Most of all, every time he admits to himself that he’s kind of relieved.

(“I don’t like this,” he told her.

Gwen didn’t even blink, shuffling through the pages of her notebook with a restless energy. “I know,” she said. “But I don’t like letting you deal with it alone. We already had our drama over this, Pete, and I’m not backing down, so either we fight about it, or we work together. Either way, there’s no way in hell that I’m staying out of this.”

Peter felt off-kilter as he looked at her. His mouth felt warm with the memory of Harley kissing him not even an hour before, and his head felt unclear as he tried to think of the right thing to say that would get her back out of the investigation entirely. The best he could come up with was a flimsy and fumbled, “It’s not safe, Gwen.”

“No fucking shit,” she retorted, rolling her eyes. “I’m not an idiot. I know this isn’t safe, but it’s better to put our heads together. It’s smarter. We’ll figure it out faster like this.”

There were a few options that popped up in his head—details of how many people Marcus Lyman has killed, the fact that there’s at least one more mob boss guy that they don’t even know the name of, just how big these armies are—but something in his chest had settled, and instead he found himself licking his lower lip and telling her, “Harley knows. About the, uh—the investigation.”

She looked up at him, pausing mid page flip, and smiled, something warm and teasing. “Is that what you talked about after I called?”

“Uh, no.” Peter thought about telling her about what they actually talked about—about how Harley likes him, about how they kissed—but it didn’t feel like the right time for that. “But he knows, so he can help, too.”

For a moment, she didn’t move, only blinking at him—once, twice, three times. Then, sounding hopeful, she asked, “Does that mean you’re actually going to let us help? Without fighting us on it or telling us that it’s too dangerous all the time?”

That bitterness had crawled up his throat, threatening to block his airway and let him suffer, but he thought about Harley being there for him so much since finding out about Spidey, and he thought about how his day-to-day felt easier knowing that he wasn’t entirely alone the way he was before. Part of him was terrified and wanted to shrivel up and die at the mere thought of allowing the people he cares about to keep being involved, but another part of him was weak in the knees at the idea of not carrying the weight of it by himself anymore.

Gwen watched him, quiet and patient as he opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again, the different parts himself battling it out, until—

“Yeah,” he told her, a gust of sound being carried on a heavy exhale as he gave up the fight within himself. “It scares me, but... I don’t think I can keep doing this alone.”)

[crazylittlejester]

I’m not kidding when I say I reread your introduction post over ten times in order to make sure I can send an ask about just about anything and I wasn’t doing anything I wasn’t supposed to, but I think I’m in the clear… hopefully.

Anyways, I wanted to ask how you think the members of the Chain would react to spiders, if that’s okay. I ask this because for the past two days I’ve been trying to clean my room, and I’ve come close to having full on panic attacks because I keep finding spiders. It got me thinking if any of them would be scared of them or not, and I’m currently too tired to try to create my own headcanons for this. Maybe one day I will, but how do you think they’d react?

On an entirely unrelated note, one of my fics involved a very brief moment where Blue and Shadow have a sort of fist fight/wrestle, and at one point Shadow threatens to bite Blue, but people in the comments keep thinking Blue’s doing the biting, and I don’t have the heart (or the courage) to correct them because it’s honestly something Blue would do. Don’t know how that’s relative to the ask because it’s not, but I have no one to share that with, and I’m sincerely hoping you don’t mind.

you’re totally and completely good, i really do mean people can send asks about anything, doesn’t have to be LU related at all, i just ask that people be kind and try to write clearly so i can understand, so you’re good don’t even worry about it :)

oUgh, i have two friends who love the little guys but they freak me out

Time i imagine would be scared of them, the big ones could probably have him shutting down, but the little ones he’ll just freeze and stare at them with wide eyes until they disappear and are no longer his problem or until someone else deals with it. he likes bugs, but not spiders

Warriors definitely has woken up to a spider on his face and screamed about it. My headcanon for him is that he grew up in the country side on a small piece of farm land in a little town, so he’s definitely seen more than his fair share of spiders, but I believe in my heart they freak him out

Twi has no issues with em, he can tell if they’re venomous and won’t mess with those, but the harmless ones? He’s found one chilling on a leaf before and coaxed it into his hand and then excitedly gone off to show Time, who forced himself to say “Oh that’s nice, kid” while screaming and crying internally, which Twilight was completely oblivious to because he was so excited

If they’re bigger than a finger nail, Sky’s terrified of em, but he can just ignore the little ones. Kinda the whole “if I can’t see it it doesn’t exist” policy

Hyrule ate one once and Twilight cried

Legend’s fine with them. No one knows if he’s telling the truth or not, but when Twilight brought one over he didn’t really react so if he IS deathly afraid of them he’s quite good at hiding it. He’s not enthusiastic about them, but he won’t run away screaming

Wild’s obsessed, he think they’re funky guys. He’s like Twilight where if he finds a cool one he WILL stop the group to look at it

Four is fine with them as long as he’s not the size of the Minish. He nearly had a heart attack the first time he encountered one when he was that little because it was like half his size

Wind SAYS he’s fine with them, but if one dropped on him he’d cry about it. He thinks they’re very cool though, and with Wild and Twilight being able to tell which ones are dangerous, he slowly becomes less afraid

OUGH THAT’S HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE, I do agree I think Blue WOULD bite someone 😭, but if it’s something that’s bothering you don’t be afraid to go in and change the wording so it’s a little more clear who’s doing the biting

Thanks for the ask!! I hope you have a wonderful rest of your day/night

[running-on-a-broken-record]

If I may… What are the Matt egos’ fears and how does the reader comfort them? (I’m a sucker for angst and hurt/comfort)

Yess absolutely! I, too, am a sucker for hurt/comfort

(I fricken love this ask)

The Detective: - Absolutely, 100% dying. - You mean to look at this man and say he doesn’t have any trauma whatsoever from being beaten to death? You’re wrong - As for comforting him (I imagine this as him having an anxiety attack or maybe even a panic attack), don’t touch him. Like at all. If he’s thinking about how he died before… probably not a good idea to add into that via touch. Even if it’s gentle, it can really mess with him - Using your voice helps a lot. Reassuring him he’s okay— that he’s alive— is the best thing to do in this situation

MadPat: - Ha ha a serial killer can’t have fears! - … yeah no. I know he goes to prison at the end of FNAF: The Musical, but I feel that before that, him being caught was terrifying - He’s not dumb, he knows how prisoners get treated. Much less felons like him - Aaaand he’s a child murderer. Definitely not looking so good for him - I mean, the obvious answer for comfort would be to make sure he won’t get caught, but if you’re not into that, just let him vent to you, or cry on your shoulder if he really needs it - He doesn’t cry often, but when he does, clinging to you and hiding his face in your shoulder as he just… lets it all out is all he needs

Mack: (Crewmate, head engineer, dictator) - I cant’t explain it, but I have the strangest headcanon that crewmate Mack has a horrible fear of spiders. - So, he sees a spider on the ship (don’t ask how it got there because I have no idea) and you just hear him scream, then run in to see him backed into a corner looking absolutely terrified - You are forced to be the Spider Killer of the relationship. But after it’s gone, he will 100% hug you tightly and thank you about a million times for getting rid of it - Head engineer Mack has a fear of failure, I think. Being overly prepared in case of a disaster? He’s scared he’ll forget something and someone will get hurt (or worse, die) and it’ll be his fault, because he failed them - When it gets really bad, it’s easy to tell, because he’ll shut himself off from everyone and throws himself into his work. Because he needs to succeed. At everything. And he can’t possibly fail if he takes every. Single. Precaution. - Take him away from working. Steal his engineering tools if you really need to, but please show him how much you love him, and that failure is a normal thing, because things happen, and that doesn’t mean he’s a bad person or that it’s his fault - Dictator Mack can’t possibly be scared of anything! He’s the leader of an entire colony! He holds absolute power over the lives of everyone! And yet he’s still afraid of losing you - He wakes up with nightmares some nights, afraid that you died in his arms and he couldn’t save you. It really messes with him when that happens - Hug him and let him cling to you like he’s afraid you’ll disappear and assure him you’re not going anywhere

The Hermit: - I’m hoping this makes sense (especially considering how he acts in AHWM) but… - I think he’s afraid of the unfamiliar. Like, someone gets stranded on the island and he gets very territorial because he’s afraid of people he doesn’t know - Especially if a stranger were to stumble across his cave. Absolutely not. That cave is a place of safety and comfort and familiarity - When he sees new people on the island, you usually have to calm him down and remind him that not all people are bad, and that more often than not, they’re lost and confused and just want to find a way back to where they belong - With your help, and a little bit of convincing, he tries to help them so he can have the island for just you two again.

WarfPat: - I really tried but I cannot possibly see WarfPat afraid of anything for some reason. Sorry :/

DarkPat: - Abandonment. - It’s why he tries to make himself seem intimidating and unapproachable. If people stay away, he can’t possibly lose them. It’s messed up logic, but it makes sense to him - And then there’s you, his lover, the one he’d risk the world for if it came down to. He’s afraid you’ll realize you deserve better than him and leave, because he can’t imagine a life without you in it - He tries to hide it from you, definitely, but you’re bound to find out. - All it takes is a little bit of reassurance. Tell him how much you love him, and that you won’t leave. He’ll be endlessly grateful for it, and for you

[massivedrickhead]

I hope i’m not late but i’m a sucker for protective Beca / only being a softie when it comes to Chloe, and this prompt seems like a perfect fit : “Are you afraid to fall asleep because you think you’re gonna have a nightmare?” so can I put the request in? 🥹 thanks in advance either way love your work

I'm honestly having so much fun with these prompts. I can't remember the last time I wrote and posted this consistently.

So thank you for sending this, and to everyone who's sent them so far!

16. “Are you afraid to fall asleep because you think you’re gonna have a nightmare?”

Prompt taken from here

Read on AO3

-

“Are you afraid to fall asleep because you think you’re gonna have a nightmare?”

Chloe rubbed her eyes and shrugged, avoiding looking at Beca. 

“Because it’s okay if that’s what it is,” Beca said. “You don’t have to be, like, embarrassed or anything.”

Chloe let out a soft laugh of disbelief. “Who still gets nightmares in their 20s?” Chloe asked, still not meeting Beca’s eyes. “What am I, six?”

Beca frowned. “Lots of people still get nightmares. I don’t think it’s got anything to do with age.”

“It’s stupid,” Chloe said, wiping away the tears that kept filling her eyes. She felt frustrated. Embarrassed. And tired.

So tired. 

“It isn’t stupid,” Beca said. Chloe rolled her eyes in response. 

“It isn’t smart.”

“If our roles were swapped would you be calling me stupid?” Beca asked. “Would you say I was embarrassing?”

“Of course not,” Chloe said.

“So don’t say it about yourself,” Beca said. 

Chloe shrugged again. “It’s how I feel,” she said. “I should know better than to be this freaked out over something that isn’t even real.”

“Sometimes fear is like that,” Beca said. “Take me and spiders. I know they aren’t going to hurt me, but I’m still terrified.”

The ghost of a smile appeared on Chloe’s face, and Beca took that as a small victory.

“You need to sleep, Chlo’,” Beca said. “You can’t keep going like this. Tell me how to help. What do you need?”

“I need to not be afraid,” Chloe said. “I don’t know how you fix that.”

Beca sighed and looked around the room, as if a solution to their problem might suddenly jump out.

“You’ve had them every night this week?” Beca asked.

Chloe nodded. “Always the same thing. I’m being chased through the house but I can’t run away fast enough. He’s always just right behind me. No matter where I hide, he finds me. And just before he kills me, I wake up.” Chloe shuddered just at the memory of it. She’d had it every night this week, and every time she’d woken up in the early hours of the morning and been completely unable to go back to sleep. She was running on three or four hours of sleep a night, and it was starting to take its toll. 

“What’s your usual bedtime routine?” Beca asked. “Do you, like, listen to music or anything, or are you one of those weirdos who goes to sleep in absolute silence?”

Chloe laughed. “Silence,” she said. “I put on my pyjamas, brush my teeth, read for a little while, and then I fall asleep. Only lately I’ve been pushing my bedtime later and later, reading for longer, until I literally can’t keep my eyes open. Then I fall asleep, have the nightmare, wake up, and just stay awake.”

Beca thought for a minute. “What if we switched up your routine?”

“In what way?” Chloe asked.

Beca checked her phone. It was pushing 10 pm now, which was a little earlier than either of them normally went to bed. “Get yourself sorted for bed and come up to my room. Amy is out with Bumper tonight.”

“Okay,” Chloe said, willing to try anything at this point. 

About 10 minutes later, Chloe was knocking on Beca’s bedroom door.

“Come in,” Beca said. 

Chloe entered and found Beca sitting on her bed, also in her pyjamas, typing on her laptop.

“You’ve got a choice,” Beca said. “You can either get in with me or take Amy’s bed.”

Chloe raised an eyebrow and approached Beca’s bed. “Like you even have to ask.”

Beca smiled. “I don’t like to assume,” she said. “Okay, have you got like a TV show or movie that you’ve seen so many times you could probably say it word for word?”

Chloe thought. “Probably Friends,” she said.

“Any particular episode?”

Chloe shook her head. “Dealer’s choice,” she said.

Beca pulled up Netflix on her laptop and picked a random episode.

She shuffled over slightly so Chloe could get into the bed and get comfy.

“What are we doing?” Chloe asked once she was settled. 

Beca turned off the lamp on her nightstand and rested the laptop on her legs so Chloe could see the screen.

“We’re just watching Friends,” Beca said. She hit play and the episode started. “Can you hear it okay?”

“Yeah,” Chloe said. “It’s a little quiet.”

“But you can still hear it?”

“Yeah, I can hear it.”

The familiarness of the show began to wash over Chloe as she settled further into the bed. She let her head rest on Beca’s shoulder.

They carried on watching the show and Chloe felt her eyes beginning to close. She cleared her throat and sat up a little straighter, trying to blink away the tiredness.

“Okay?” Beca asked.

“Yeah.”

“Comfy enough?”

“Yeah,” Chloe said again, stifling a yawn. 

“Hey,” Beca said. “It isn’t bedtime yet, you can’t fall asleep.”

Chloe let out a snort of laughter, her head resting on Beca’s shoulder again.

“I feel like I’m being tricked,” she said. “Like that bit in Mary Poppins when she tells the kids they aren’t allowed to go to sleep.”

“No trick here,” Beca said. “We’re just watching Friends.”

“Uh-huh.”

They carried on watching in silence, one episode blending into the next, until Chloe was fighting to keep her eyes open.

“It’s okay,” Beca said, her voice softer than Chloe had ever heard it. “You can close your eyes. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

Chloe made a grumbling noise of disagreement and forced them open again. 

“You don’t have to sleep,” Beca said. “Just close your eyes and listen to the show.”

Chloe didn’t want to, but she didn’t have much of a choice. 

As she finally let them close, she felt Beca move beneath her, and Beca’s shoulder was replaced by a pillow.

It felt impossibly comfortable. 

Friends was still playing, so Chloe kept listening until it all started drifting away.

And then she was back in the empty Bellas house. Back in the darkness. Back to running away from this figure chasing her.

Only this time, she wasn’t alone. 

This time, Beca was waiting for her at the front door. Urging her forward, a hand outstretched, reaching for her.

Her hand closed around Beca’s and Beca tugged her, and they both started running.

Out of the house and away from the man.

Away from the nightmare.

She woke with a start still, but her chest wasn’t filled with panic like it usually was.

“Hey,” came Beca’s slightly raspy voice from beside her. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”

Chloe saw the laptop was still open on Beca’s lap, the light of the screen illuminating her tired face. It looked like she was working on a mix.

“You’re okay,” Beca said again. “I’m here.”

Chloe let out a shaky exhale as her shoulders relaxed. 

“I know you are,” she said, settling back down onto the bed and falling back to sleep almost immediately. 

[a-smol-cosplayer]

Okay here are more!! These are literally almost every ship friendly - wyler, wenclair, wavier, enid/ajax (what it their ship name?) ect plus just general friendship gang stuff :) enjoy 

//

Wednesday: We have no idea how many stars there are.

Ajax: I think there are 7.

Wednesday: …No there are more than 7.

Enid: You just said we have no idea.

Wednesday: We know there are more than 7.

Enid: Well apparently you’re a liar so I’m even more convinced it’s 7.

Ajax: exactly.

/ 

Tyler: So you're a thief.

Thing: I like to call myself a specialist in complicated acquisitions.

\

Enid: Wednesday, if I was the last girl on earth would you date me?

Wednesday: (confused) If you were the last girl on earth..

Wednesday: then I wouldn't exist??

Enid (internally): Is she not interested or am I just bad at this??

\

Bianca: you need a hobby.

Xavier: i have a hobby.

Bianca: staring at Wednesdays face isn’t a hobby.

Xavier: you’re right. it’s a profession and i excel at my job.

/

Wednesday: You deserve a reward for putting up with me.

Enid: You are my reward. 

*meanwhile* 

Tyler: You deserve a reward for putting up with me. 

Wednesday: True, you can be a really annoying sometimes.

\

Xavier: My brother says I'm a catch.

Bianca: Well, if I caught you, I'd throw you back into the ocean.

/

Wednesday: LOOK, I APPRECIATE YOU COMING ALL THE WAY OUT HERE TO SEE ME, BUT I'M KIND OF IN THE MIDDLE OF SOLVING A MYSTERY. CAN WE DO THIS ANOTHER TIME? 

Bianca:

Bianca: Are you seriously asking to reschedule a kidnapping right now 

\

Ajax: When I was little, I wanted Spider Man powers, so I found a spider and let it bite me.

Ajax: Later that day my parents took me to a doctor and I got diagnosed with ADHD.

Ajax: For years I was afraid that getting bitten by the spider, instead of giving me super powers, had given me ADHD.

/

*Tyler, wearing a blazer*

Tyler: Hey, Enid. Do you think I'm overdressed?

Enid: Depends on the activity. For a doctors appointment, yes.

Enid: If you're going to a casino, I'd add sequins.

*Tyler, returning in a tshirt and a cap*

Tyler: Too casual?

Enid: For an audience with the queen, yes.

Enid: For an evening of passing a bottle of fortified wine around a flaming trash can, you look great!

\

Wednesday: Why are you on the floor?

Tyler: I'm depressed.

Wednesday: Oh.

Tyler: Also, I was stabbed. Can you call an ambulance please?

/

Enid: Quick, take my hand!

Wednesday, grabbing his hand: Now what?

Enid: Nothing. I just wanted to hold hands.

\

Ajax: Bro, do you lift?

Xavier: Yeah dude, how did you know?

Ajax: Because you lift my heart whenever you're around.

Xavier: Bro.

Ajax: Bro.

/

Enid: Don't worry, no one else is gonna ask Wednesday out! You have all the time you need

Tyler: How do you know?

Enid: Because Wednesday is terrifying

\

Enid, about Tyler: He's covered in blood again. Why is it that he's always covered in blood?  

Wednesday: Well, it looks like it's his own blood this time.  

/

Bianca and Yoko: *pushing Wednesday and Enid under mistletoe*

Bianca: Oh, I guess you two are going to have to kiss now, that’ll be awkward!

Enid and Wednesday: *kissing casually*

Yoko: That was way too casual.

Bianca: Yeah…

Enid: Oh, did we forget to tell you? We’ve been dating for two months now.

\

Wednesday: Everything’s fine.

Enid: Wednesday, I know your relationship with the english language is strictly casual, but you- I- *deep inhale* ALLOW ME TO TELL YOU WHAT’S NOT FINE.

/

Bianca: what’s it like dating Wednesday?

Xavier: once I asked for water while she was pissed at me. she brought me a cup of ice, looked me dead in the eye and said “wait.”

Bianca: I see.

\

Enid: Hey, Tyler, can you help me carry this box?

Tyler: *Carrying the box effortlessly* Nothing is heavier than the weight of my internal torment.

Enid: I’m impressed but also concerned.

/

Enid: is something burning?

Ajax: just my love for you

Enid: Ajax, the toaster is on fire

\

Wednesday: Don't do anything I wouldn't do.

Enid: That doesn't narrow it down.

/

Xavier, to Bianca: Can you believe some people see Wednesday and aren’t immediately filled with absolute unconditional love for her?

Xavier: They don’t even get the urge to kiss her right there.

Xavier: That’s incomprehensible to me.

Bianca, drinking her third shot of whiskey: Yeah, we got it like 3 hours ago, Xavier.

\

Tyler: the moon looks beautiful, doesn’t it?

Enid: hm.. but do you know what’s more beautiful?

Tyler and Enid in unison: Wednesday.

/

Yoko narrating: This is Wednesday. Wednesday loves his personal space.

Yoko: This is Enid. Enid also loves Wednesday’s personal space.

\

Wednesday: I love murder mysteries.

Tyler, trying to impress her: I've been a suspect in four murder cases!

/

Xavier: Two years ago, I married my best friend.  

Xavier: Enid and Wednesday are still mad about it, but me and Ajax were drunk and thought it was funny.

\

Wednesday: when I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case? 

Bianca: what?

Wednesday: I wanna be on buzzfeed unsolved.

Bianca: can we go back the part where you said "when I get murdered"?

/

Wednesday: What the fuck is wrong with you??  

Tyler: What? No good morning?  

Wednesday: Good morning, what the fuck is wrong with you?? 

\

Ajax: are these brownies…special?

Enid: they are

[later]

Ajax: i don't feel anything, are you sure there's weed in the brownies?

Enid: they are special because i made them with love, you little shit 

/

Wednesday: You kill people for money?!

Tyler: I can explain!

Wednesday: And all this time I’ve been doing it for free like a chump?!

\

Bianca, holding up an antique bottle: Do you think this is whiskey or perfume? 

Ajax: *Grabs and chugs the entire bottle*

Ajax:

Ajax: Definitely perfume

/

Wednesday: I'm starting to reach the point at which even I don't know if I'm sarcastic or not.

\

Enid: Don’t climb on the table! It’s unstable.

Yoko: I'm unstable too it's gonna cancel out. Pemdas.

Enid:

Enid: THAT’S NOT HOW THAT WORKS. 

/

Wednesday: i didn’t mean to offend you.. but it was a huge plus.

Xavier: isn’t your dad a literal murderer?

Wednesday: what? are you upset that my dad spent eight years looking for me while yours doesn't even know you exist?

Xavier:

Enid:

the whole room: 

\

Tyler: You use sarcasm to distance yourself from people. 

Wednesday: And yet, you’re still here.     

/

Wednesday:

Tyler:

Wednesday:

Tyler: ur talking mad shit for someone in kissing distance.

\

Enid: FLIRT BACK GODDAMNIT

Wednesday: HOW

/

Yoko: Well, if you're not at least a little bit gay for your friends, then what kind of friend are you? 

\

Enid: You need to be nicer to people.

Wednesday: I am nice.

Enid: You just threatened to stab someone.

Wednesday: And I think it was pretty nice of me to give them a warning.

/

Enid: Did it hurt when you fell- 

Tyler: From heaven? Hate to break it to you Enid but im in love with wednesday—

Enid: No, I meant when you fell down the stairs. 

Tyler: ... 

Enid: You just laid there for 15 minutes

\

Wednesday: If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one.  

Tyler:…

Xavier:…

Enid:…

/

Wednesday: I went B and E without you.

Thing, offended: You went to a bed and breakfast without me?

Wednesday: No, B and E--breaking and entering.

Thing, even more offended: WITHOUT ME?!

\

Xavier, throwing a coin into a fountain: I wish for world peace.

Wednesday, glaring as they throw one in too: I wish for world war.

/

Wednesday: Can you perform under pressure?

Xavier: No but I could take a stab at ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’

\

Enid: You call yourself my friend, but where were you when my meme only had four likes?

Tyler: Making four accounts.

Enid, tearing up: Really...?

/

*at a restaurant* 

Enid: I’ll have the chef’s salad 

Ajax: *whispering* Babe that’s so rude, just order your own 

\

Bianca: Ah shit, I forgot.

Xavier: Forgot what?

Bianca: How do you expect me to answer that?

/

Eugene: *visibly upset* 

Enid: Eugene, what happened? I haven't seen you like this since you found out candyland wasn't an actual country.

\

Wednesday: Tyler, keep an eye on Xavier today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.

Tyler: Sure, I’d love to see Xavier get punched.

Wednesday: Try again.

Tyler: I will stop Xavier from getting punched.

/

Enid: This is such a bad idea.

Tyler: Then why are you coming along?

Enid: One of us needs to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

\

Bianca: What scares you the most?

Enid: Ghost.

Tyler: Loosing Wednesday.

Wednesday: The unstoppable marching of time that is slowly guiding us all towards an inevitable death.

Xavier:

Bianca:

Enid:

Ajax: Wednesday. I'm scared of Wednesday.

/

Wednesday tending to Tylers scratches: how would you rate your pain?

Tyler: zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

\

Wednesday: my mother taught me to think before i act.

Wednesday: …so if i smack the shit out of you, rest assured that i thought about it and am confident in my decision.

/

Xavier: Wednesday loves me. She just doesnt care for my general happiness or self-esteem.

\

Ajax: thank you, nature, for pre-slicing oranges for us. You didnt have to and you did anyway and that was cool of you

/

Wednesday: …enid, what are you doing?

Enid, standing on the couch: i live here too, y’know. i can stand wherever i want, thank you very much.

Wednesday:

Enid:

Wednesday:

Wednesday *sighing*: where’s the spider?

Enid: under the table.

\

Tyler: Why are you late?

Wednesday: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness.

Tyler: You overslept?

Wednesday: I overslept.

/

Wednesday: *angrily presses Tyler against a wall* WHO IS YOUR MASTER?!

Tyler: ...

Tyler: Are we about to kiss-

\

[ After directly disobeying the principles orders ]

Wednesday: Anyone else have the weird urge to lecture themselves?

Wednesday, as Weems: Ms Addams, what do you think you are doing?

Weems, appearing from behind Wednesday: Ms Addams, what do you think you are doing?

Wednesday: I conjured her.

/

Wednesday: were you dropped on your head as a child? 

Tyler: bold of you to assume I was even held

Wednesday: 

Tyler: 

Enid: 

Enid: Tyler, we’ve talked about this 

\\

Mkay thats it!! Y’all are eating these up and I enjoy making them so if u want more pls ask I will do so with the slightest excuse. 

[plitaka]

Okay so because I’m gay and mentally ill I have decided to take it upon myself to go through Kafka’s demo frame by frame and overanalyze the shit out of anything I find interesting

It’s insanely packed with blink or you’ll miss it details so buckle up folks- this is gonna be a ride

Right off the bat she starts off with the same coin she also ends the demo with. This isn’t something that’s been part of her character so far nor do I think it has any real significance, so she just brought it to be extra and torment the poor souls she’s planning to slaughter anyway. Annoying dramatic bitch

Also just to get this out of the way now, this is indeed the Belobog museum, or at least its assets. The floor of some of the inner rooms, the staircases, the chandelier and the big golden clock thingy are the same, and in one of the shots you can clearly see the portraits of the former supreme guardians which is. Makes you wonder if they just picked the museum for grand dramatic interior or if she actually had reasons to have business there.

This. This fucking part is probably no longer than 5 seconds and yet, even with the video on 0.25 speed I had to constantly rewind and pause to catch everything and it still probably isn’t 100% accurate. Also I had to cut out a lot things because Tumblr only allows 30 images per post but like, you get the picture

“What do you see” over and over again as images of Rorschach tests flash across the screen so fast you barely have a chance *to* see. Personally I mainly see spider like things and butterflies. Among them are images are some flashes of the robo guards, which to me give the feeling of them getting caught in her web, losing themselves and their control to her mind games and technique.

Something else worth nothing is that this sequence is kickstarted by her throwing the coin and ends with it still in her hand, just thought that was an interesting choice

Before moving on to the next point, however, I want to point out the obvious irony of her telling the guards “don’t be afraid”. Truly words to hear from the woman who is incapable of feeling fear. And what is the name of the demo? Dramatic irony. We’ll get back to that.

Anyway, after that we see the camera pan away from her and over the guards as she uses spirit whisper. The camera movement is accompanied by a single rose petal that starts from Kafka and flies over the guards, which kinda feels like the visual representation of spirit whisper, a gentle rose petal innocently brushing across them as if carried by an invisible breeze

I wanted to make a joke about how her bounty is as large as her strap but seeing as I’m restricted in the number of images I can put I’ll just state the obvious and say she has the largest known bounty of the Stellaron hunters. I’m going to guess the only one higher than hers is Elio’s.

can’t be 100% sure this is what’s going on here, but the imagery makes it look like she’s taking a nice calming stroll and playing Vivaldi in her head while letting the guards slaughter each other, either by controlling them with her strings or with spirit whisper

Dozens of hands reaching out for her, trying to grab her as she’s cocooned in a vulnerable state, pupils visible. I’m sure we’ll eventually get an ingame explanation as to what’s actually going on with her eyes, but for now I do think this is a VERY interesting time to show them. She’s in a compromising position, she’s cornered and vulnerable, but she’s confident and cocky and always, always in control. To anyone else this would be horrifying, but she can’t feel fear, why should she care. Like genuinely this is terrifying imagery that in media is more often than not used to showcase or symbolize sexual violence of sorts and personally makes my skin crawl. I don’t want to get too much into it here I think it needs its own separate post, so for now I’ll keep it short and say that up until now, her pupils have only been shown in situations where she’s at a physical disadvantage (held prisoner at the divination commission, whatever this is etc)

Something a bit lighter to focus on is what she’s saying; “the silk is too fragile to be a treat… unless you’re more fragile than the silk.” Symbolism aside she always seems to refer to silk when talking about fragile things, which we know are, in her opinion, the most beautiful. I really don’t think she’s referring to herself here seeing as the next scene demonstrates she’s far from fragile, so I think she does mean it in a much more literal way and is talking about a spider web; too fragile to capture humans, strong enough to capture its intended prey, this being weaker bugs. All in all she’s probably insulting them by comparing them to bugs weaker than a fragile silk web.

Nothing much to say about the fight scene other than that it’s incredibly choreographed and confirms that Kafka is strong enough to roundhouse kick a guy in the head (god I wish that were me) and do backflips in midair while firing her guns. Also the elevator counting down the survivors as their forces dwindle is fucking rad.

“Destiny has thousands of faces, why does it choose to wear this one?” In the context of the scene this reads to me as her mockingly lamenting the guards’ fate as she beautifully takes them down one by one, but it’s also one hell of a peculiar sentence from someone working for a guy who supposedly sees destiny and directs his followers according to that. She’s a nihilist, everything is predetermined in her eyes, she’s one of destiny’s slaves, but destiny also has thousands of faces? Is she really so nihilistic that even her own worldviews are contrasting in her eyes? As I’m writing this it makes me think of dadaism more than anything else. To quote from wikipedia: “an early 20th-century international movement in art, literature, music, and film, repudiating and mocking artistic and social conventions and emphasizing the illogical and absurd.” Kafka herself in an artist in many ways; she’s an actress first and foremost, always dramatic and theatrical, following a script to a T. But she’s also a musician, everything about her steeped in classical music and references. Anyway, dada is an absurdist nihilistic movement, and you know which real life author known for his absurdism lived and wrote parallel to the Dada? Franz Kafka.

Genuinely Idk where I was going with this I just thought it was worth sharing, MOVING ON-

Neat way of visualizing what I’m assuming is supposed to be her spirit whisper. Also I’m extremely stingy with images (thanks Tumblr), but if you slow down the video around 1:17 you could see that the shot of her katana very quickly flashes into another spider, just wanted to mention that.

These are all narrative screenplay terms that flash by in like a millisecond each after the big ult (that, btw, has a similar shot saying ‘intermission’ right before she casts it but it flashes by so fast and with such bright colors that I couldn’t take a proper screenshot of it) and shown on the Belobog Museum’s projector. The most interesting one here imo is Oneiric Structure; “a cinematic story using dream like visuals, exploring the structure of dreams, memories, and human consciousness”, very fitting considering how much of her abilitieseing how dramatic irony is yet another narrative device.

All these movie terms and framings, however, feel to me more like a wink to Kafka’s roots than anything else. This is the third time she’s been tied to movies somehow (the web event, one of her leaked messages that actually mentions how she’d hate for her life to be turned into a movie), and this is one time too many for me to stop denying that the inspiration for her character was at least in part Makima from Chainsaw Man. I won’t elaborate too much not to spoil the 3 people unfamiliar with csm, but this whole thing feels like a homage, a love letter to Fujimoto’s own love letter for cinema.

Also she *is* an actress following a script, so there’s that as well.

The demo ends with her taunting the one remaining guard with the very same coin from the beginning, flipping it in her palm and asking the guard to guess the ending with heads or tails, prefacing it by saying “sooner or later, the curtain has to fall”. To me this indicates that she sees life as kind of a one gigantic play, with no fear and no value for human life everything is a performance to her, it doesn’t matter beyond what’s happening on the stage in the presence. But also the way this is all framed makes it very easy to assume she’s actually talking about the end of the guard’s life, and asking him how he thinks this encounter between them will end, lol.

Another thing about the coin that Meadows mentioned “her flipping the coin over and over is both like, play with fate, a distraction (like, think in movies, you see someone flipping a coin your eyes are drawn to it and not the sleight of hand happening elsewhere), and ofc her clear obsession with vintage shit”

This has been it from me for now, too dead to properly edit through this rn so I’ll probably go back and add some details once I’m feeling better. Would also love for anyone to chime in with their own conclusions since this is just one person’s interpretation. Especially if you have more knowledge than me about classical music and have ideas regarding the use of Vivaldi’s winter