#someone plz give me mental support
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realmyth · 3 months ago
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I am not mentally prepared for tomorrow
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greensagephase · 4 months ago
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Just realized how much I love the way you write your Miguel. Like instead of oversexualizing, making him animalistic or just straight up a dick (even tho he kindof is sometimes, let's be honest-)
I just love how you dive in his current trauma (not too long ago his mom got zombified like marvel give bro a break plz), include trust issues and his mental problems, while not breaking his character. You made him stubborn, a little proud, but still show slight vulnerability, and so many unsaid words. Hell, you might be one of the best Miguel writers I've ever seen on here!
I love the slow burn in NC, it makes Miguel seem more like a real person, with unbearable trauma and trust issues, who's main way to 'cope' is "by leading a society of Peter Parkers who can't pay their rent on time" (from the ATSV artbook), and as someone with a mental health too similar to Miguel's I can see myself in him (THAT'S A COMPLIMENT) with a slow build of trust
While I sometimes do enjoy a bit of smut, most of the time, it's too fast. Too quick, like- CALM DOWN LADIES (and gents), I DON'T THINK MIGUEL'S GONNA EAT YOU OUT ON THE COUNTER IN THE KITCHEN LIKE EMPANADAS
ALSO DID U KNO HE'S BI???
Hiii, Dino!!! Thank you for the ask, pookie!! 🥰 Also, I'm sorry for taking a few days to answer your ask. I took a few days off tumblr due to life :))
But omg, thank you!! I appreciate the kind words so much, and I’m happy that you love NC!Miguel and the slow burn! 🥹 Also, I’m glad you appreciate the acknowledgement of Miguel’s issues, traumas, and mental state within the fic. I’m no expert; no psychologist nor professional writer, but as the story expanded, I decided that I’d like to dive into Miguel’s story a little more, this being a Spider-Man Miguel fic after all, and one that’s attempting to portray Miguel as realistic as possible (or at least the way I see him and think he’d be like), so that entails including his issues, traumas, and mental state, too.
I know this has led to some chapters being a little delicate, overwhelming, and/or sad (and I’m sorry to anyone who has ever felt down or cried reading NC because they resonated with this content, or the emotions got a little too much. This has never been my intention ):), but I believe it’s important to address, especially because his issues, traumas, and mental state overall are big contributors to his behaviour and mindset in ATSV. As I said, I’m no expert, but just from what I learned in college and have learned throughout the years with personal experiences (seen close people dealing with similar issues like those Miguel has faced and is facing), I know healing from such traumas is important to move forward with life. I also know it takes time, which is a big reason why this fic is a slow burn.
I want Miguel to find himself in a healthy and positive mindset, learn to trust others, and know that he is worthy of love and friendships before he finds himself in a romantic relationship. I’ve yapped too much, but I’m glad that you appreciate that, even though these can be sensitive themes/discussions. Thank you! Also, I’m touched that you can see yourself in NC!Miguel and how he slowly begins to allow himself to trust someone. I hope that as the story progresses, you can continue to see yourself in him in a non-harmful way (I never wish to portray mental health negatively nor disrespect/offend someone)! 💖
And hehehe, your comment about the smut and empanadas has me laughing! 🤣 But I hope you can find more fics with a slower pace regarding that aspect though! I know there’s awesome and talented writers who continue to write for Miguel on here that feed my delusions about this man and post very regularly (thank you Miguel writers - ily 🥰), so keep your eyes open and support what you enjoy reading!!
ALSO, yes, but also no?? I saw a tweet a very long time ago of Oscar Isaac apparently saying Miguel was bi, but idk if it’s canon because I haven’t read any of the comics 😞 (all the plot lines within NC that align with the comics have been researched from other sources). Is it confirmed in the comics? :))
Thank you so much for the ask!! I hope you’re having a great day/night, Dino!! Pls take care!! 🫶🏼💖
Alondra❤️
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hi ppl. Welcome to my lil corner of the internet i guess.
About me
I go by Show & Scar & Dino & those could change but I love them 🥰
I use he/him pronouns, some neos idk
Minor
Links
☆ @shketchark is my side blog for art & general creative stuff
☆ @Arlieosaurus-the-2nd is mainly a "reblog/random shit" alt account (I linked it cause it wouldn't do it itself)
☆ @namehelp is my side blog for names & giving ppl names through asks :] (long hiatuses are prevalent, depression is a bitch, ill always answer asks though, it will take a while, im sorry for this ;>)
☆ Heres my pronouns.page and my pronouns.cc with a dump of my flags & pronouns & stuff (the 2nd 1 is most extensive). Heres a post w/ my lables (linked) that is occasionally updated
☆ my new carrd to be added soon
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Favorite posts (links embedded in text)
☆ MMIP Zine
☆ Essay on being Native & Aro
☆ Art of my favorite Indigiqueer fictional son :>(Marshall for short lol)
☆ proximiplatonic/intaplatonic coining post
☆ STOO/Kiwi coining post
☆ april fools boop-o-meter
☆ aro ford hc & aro ford + bi mable hc
☆ village accent
☆ floating orb/void wish
☆ DONT BE GUILY OVER TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF (message to me)
☆ finding $30 after complaining I didn't have money for book of bill
☆ 2020 protest art
☆ election day
☆ election day vent
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DNI/ppl i want to block me (plz :] )
Block me if you are: homophobic, transphobic, aphobic, a queer exclusionist, racist, ablist, a proshipper, radqueer, or a terf.
Block me if you voted for trump
Fuckers who don't respect triggers
NSFW blogs
Adult ran accounts are mostly fine but as long as its not NSFW, but I still examine caution around accounts run by adults
If you don't like me, just block 🤷 I couldn't care less
I'm online to be happy & for good experiences so I block liberally
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fyi
☆ you may notice editing/rewording on this section. This is cause i have extreme anxiety & fear confrontation- or just fear of interaction honestly. Therefor i fear making strong statments, even about myself & things im passionate about, & feel the need to explain everything (hence this whole paragraph. I'm making baby steps on this). I'm online for positive experiences, whilst I do that i attempt to educate myself, but things are multifaceted & require research & talking to people & motivation/depression dosnt often allow me that energy. I'm ultimately here to turn my brain off & escape. I have alot going on & my brain only takes so much. Editing this was just for my own mental security as someone with life long untreated anxiety & dosnt show change in my stances.
☆ I stand with Ukraine 🇺🇦 & Palestine 🇵🇸. I honestly dont support any state or gov, I support people, not an entity. I don't think the innocent should be killed on either/any side, I don't support killing innocent people in general. I don't post about them alot but thats my opinion & I'll stand by it. Ik having some flags in my bio doesn't do shit, this is just an fyi cause I don't really post about it & don't want ppl misconstuding me. I just use tumblr as an escape & dont feel educated enough to speak on the matter more than this & the occasional reblog. That and I don't want saying some shit wrong about such an important issue to bite me in the ass.
How you can help Palestine while being a child/minor
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ssuperficialspacecadett · 2 years ago
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W o w
2 more stellar chapters!!!!! I can’t wait for our fav receptionist to try out being a ring girl! (Is the asshole guy gonna try something and we get to see Frankie/the guys jump in? Bc protective men is 😭😭)
Anyway I love love love how you wrote the guy’s relationships with each other!!!!
If and only if inspiration strikes, I would love a scene from a “guys night”
Either before our girls comes into their lives or after, just then having fun and being them 🥹 bc I feel a lot of fics over look the importance of their friendship esp in regard to Frankie like Frankie fics will sometimes act like he has had no support until the girl comes in his life but yours just shows how much they all love each other
Doesn’t gotta be long (or even at all!) maybe just a nice lil thing 🥰
Ily have a wonderful day!!
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Best Friends, Beers, and Bets - Through the Scope Drabble
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Rating: everyone (just the boys being silly and goofy together)
Word Count: 1K
Notes: hi everyone ! i know i have been gone for a hot minute and i am deeply sorry about that. there has been a lot of not so fabulous things going on in my life and in my mental state that has left with with little motivation to write. the worst part is? im 3/4 done with chapter 11 ... like girl plz just finish that hoe DAMN ! but i found the motivation today to write for this lovely ask i received a little bit ago (: i love the idea of getting to take a peak inside how the TF boys are before Estrella came into the picture. so a very big thank you to @romanarose for this !! chronologically, this takes place before chapter one.
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Frankie, Will, and Santi sit together in the back of The Barrel at their usual table. The bar isn't particularly full this evening, but the comforting hum of conversations emitting from the regulars fill the empty chairs. They talk and laugh amongst each other as they wait for their last member to arrive: Benny. It had been only four days since his receptionist quit, but the hurt was apparent to everyone. Usually, she was the one to help him clean up after they close the gym down for the evening. Both of them managed to get it done relatively quickly too. Unfortunately, in her absence, Benny had to do it all himself. The other guys had repeatedly offered to give him a hand in the evenings, but Benny refused. He said that he had it covered and that they should just wait for him at the bar. Not wanting to press him further, the trio would retreat across the street. 
“Here he is! We all thought you fell into the washing machine and couldn’t get out.” Santi claps Benny on the shoulder as he makes his way to buy a round for everyone. 
“You were 15 minutes slower than yesterday.” Will says, tapping his watch while his brother takes a seat next to him. 
“Gee, that makes me feel great! Fish, do you want to rub salt in my wounds too?” 
“I’m just happy you’re finally here, man.” Frankie’s eyes convey sincerity. “But you’re going to run yourself ragged doing all that clean up by yourself. Why don’t you let us help?” 
“Yeah.” Santi rejoins the table and passes out the bottles. A few seconds of silence go by as each man takes a moment to wash away the stress of their day with deep gulps of chilled liquid. “We are offering to help you clean. It’s not like you’re forcing us.” 
Will nods in agreement and tips his bottle in both Frankie and Santi’s direction.
“I just hate the idea of y’all doin’ work I’m completely capable of.” 
“It doesn’t make you any less of a man if we help you clorox a few work benches, Benny.” Frankie says gingerly.
“I know, I know. To be honest with y’all?” Benny scoots closer into the table. “It’s kinda lonely there without someone to talk to in between clients.”
“My bed is going to be kinda lonely too if it makes you feel any better.” Santi offers. 
This manages to get a laugh out of the very tired looking Benny. “Oh is it now? Poor you.”
“Poor me is right! Your receptionist may have kept you company during the day but she kept me company during the night. Now that she's quit, that means I have to as well.”
“That’s not what that means at all, Pope.” Will says with a raised eyebrow. “You can still see her even if she doesn’t work at Brass Knuckles anymore.” 
“Well she also started talking about getting exclusive…”
“And there’s the real reason!” Will laughs. 
“Can we get back to my issue?” Benny begs. “What do I do? No one has answered the ads I’ve posted online. I don’t know how much longer I can handle juggling training clients and taking care of the in between tasks.”
“What about good old fashioned paper flyers? You could give some to me to hang at the auto shop. Will could take some to the VA?”
“Absolutely not.” Santi says with conviction. “I will not have a man take this job and ruin my chances of meeting another beautiful woman.” 
“Fine.” Frankie rolls his eyes. “What about a bookstore or a coffee shop? Does that sound better to you?”
“That’s not a bad idea, but do people even read those flyers? I know I don’t.” Benny shrugs.
“Well you’re not the one that's desperate for a job. I would just make sure you print out the ads on bright paper so it catches peoples eye.” 
“That’s not a bad idea either.” Benny says to his brother. “Still, who knows how long it's going to take before someone calls about it?” 
All four men are quiet as they brainstorm possible solutions to the problem that's currently plaguing them.
“I’ve got it!” Santi snaps his fingers. “I bet you that you can’t find another receptionist within a week of the last one leaving.” 
“Pope, what the fuck?” Benny looks shocked.
“Yeah, why are you actively saying he can’t do it?” Frankie questions. 
Santi only chuckles and Will shortly joins him when he puts the pieces together in his head. 
“You cabrons aren’t listening to me. I bet you that you can’t find another receptionist within a week of the last one leaving. You’ve never backed away from a bet as long as I’ve known you, Benny.” 
“He does love to prove you wrong, Pope.” Will has his arms crossed over his stomach and they rise and fall easily as he begins laughing again. 
A look of realization settles over the two other men.
“Alright, I’ll take you up on that.” Benny and Pope shake hands across the table. “You’re a dick though. She’s been gone for four days now. I only have three days to find someone else to hire.” 
“Damn.” Pope takes a sip of his drink. “I guess you better get your ass into the printer shop tomorrow and make some flyers. If you don’t, drinks are on you when the clock runs out.” 
Will and Frankie cheer knowing that no matter how this bet ends, they will be getting free beer. 
“What happens if a man calls before a woman does?” Benny looks smugly at Pope. “I’m not goin’ to tell him no if it’s in my three day window of search time.”
“Won’t happen. I can feel it in my bones.” 
“Even if, what did you say before, a beautiful woman calls about the job, that doesn’t mean she’ll want to immediately hop into your bed.” Frankie states playfully.
“You think she’s going to want to hop into yours, Fish?”
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{tag list: @cutesyscreenname @rsquared31 @smol-beb @bitchwitch1981 @avastrasposts @hoeslingz @saltybutteredtoast @javicstories @c-justhere @pimosworld @modernperplexity @beboldbebravethings @mxtokko @moonliqhtszn @tanzthompson @megcads @myloveistoolittle @casa-boiardi @jitterbugs927 @partyofone3413 @pedrit0-pascalit0 @golden-library @pati-et-vivere @mashomasho @lilmizmoz @angstylittlepascal @sofiparallel @selflcontrol @adriennemichelle98 @painitemoondust @pedritosgirl2000 @tpwkmera @romanarose @missbabyjay @missgurrl }
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levitheeldritch · 2 years ago
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About me!
Strawpage (Last upd: Jan 10, 2025)
Here's my strawpage! It has my (future) commission info, general info, boundaries, other socials, and my works, along with a more detailed content usage page.
ATTENTION DONATION ASKERS!
I cannot give you money as I am a minor without a job, nor do I have a large following to share your donation asks with. Asking me will Garner nothing, I apologize. This goes for everyone. Please do not waste your time on me.
Age, Dni, tags, sideblogs, content usage, and general blog warnings under cut.
Dni:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Basic dni criteria, no bigots, racists, terfs, radfems. Also, Zionosts. Anyone pro israel in the war.
Pro/darkshippers + supporters (no, I don't care if you ship two characters with no chemistry or from separate media. I do care if they are related, nonconsensual, or it's pedophilic, or you defend it by saying "it's just fiction". As someone who sustained trauma from the proship community, I don't feel safe around you). This also includes Loli/shotacon. I don't care if it's anime, you're still a pedophile. Neutrals/no stance are ok, as long as you don't hold the same idea that media is ok, no matter the contents, just because it's fiction.
Anti Endo (While I understand skepticism, seeing the way a lot of you talk about Endos is just... No thank you. The brain works in weird ways, saying something is "Impossible" just isn't a good excuse to call other people "scum" or whatever).
MDNI accounts (Less of a DNI and more of a DNF. If it's just one or two posts you interact with, then whatever. We're not talking about dick, so it's fine.)
Please tell me if I accidentally followed an 18+ account, I didn't check!
16! My birthday is April 14th!
Byf---
This blog may contain themes not suitable for sensitive audiences. I tend to write about topics relating to depression, mental health, and horror. I draw these topics, as well as gore, blood, (Very very rare) suggestive art, and nonsexual nudity. All should be properly tagged, I use all the TWs and CWs I can, but let me know if I forgot something!
I sometimes have processing issues, or may misread something. Let me know if I get confused! I also have an anxiety disorder and some sort of paranoia disorder, so please be patient with me.
Plz don't expect any art requests to be answered! I'll do it if I like it, but no promises!
Tags---
My sona: any posts with tags: "Sona". I have several different Sonas, so they'll have different names. Specifically: Omen, Levi/Leviathan, Camo, Rorschach(Rors), Lucid, Leri(Riri), and Doc Sol/Pavlov, LV!, Arson.
My non- reblog tags are in the post so you don't have to scroll to find my stuff
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Wips: #Goopingwips
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Writing: #Goopypages
This isn't a tag, but I do have a list of a group of suspected fake Palestinian fundraisers in my ask box. I can't exactly give any money to actual Palestinians in need, but I can warn others to not give money to the ones pretending to be Palestinians.
Also, please don't repost or use our art without our permission! Ask first, my Dms are open! (Reblogs don't count, obviously.) If you use our art for something simple like a discord pfp, you don't have to ask, but credit is required.
Edits? Using it in a video? Ask first.
Reposting it? Unless I did the art for you, and I say you can, nogo. Absolutely not.
Translations of my (future) works, or reposting them to sites used by those where Tumblr/bluesky is not accessible? Dm me about it!
Sideblogs:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
EDENISBURNING-official blog (project): @edenisburning-official
Reblog account (EXTRA THOUGHT CONTENT‼️‼️❗❗❕❕‼️❗❕) @levireblogs
No man's sky account: @leviathan-among-the-stars
Art only account: @leviathans-garden
Not a sideblog, but instead one I help post on: @firefox-archive
Anyways, hope you enjoy the stuff we post! Stay sparkly, and stay safe.
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(This account is system friendly! And xenogender friendly. And other human/therian otherkin friendly. And a kink safe space (although, we will not talk about things like that very often)).
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alyjojo · 2 years ago
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May 😽 2023 Monthly - Cancer
Whole of your energy: 9 Wands
You always have the readings with the most symbolism of any other sign, with things like numbers and patterns, it’s never just black/white, what’s out here is what it is. Like Aries for example, squares your sign, almost never any of this with them, it is what it is & straight to the point plz - nobody got time 😆. You could be dealing with one for me to say that. You know, not everyone speaks this intuitive language. In fact, it’s rare. High Priestess energy. Your energy. It’s a gift for you, and a curse for those around you that don’t get it.
9 Wands is someone who has gone through battle after battle after battle, they’re freakin exhausted. Close to the finish line, almost at the end, but they’re weary and wounded, they need a break. They aren’t giving up though. This all pertains to finances over anything else, a career. Possibly a King of Pentacles, if a person, but for most he represents a business owner, career, stability, a “boss” mentality, being financially successful & abundant. Many of you have lost jobs, with 10 Swords, or something huge has hit you financially and you just can’t get ahead of it, it’s like nothing you do changes or has changed this situation. Wheel of Fortune very much feels like it’s just representing Jupiter in this reading, it’s ruled by Jupiter, and it’s been in Aries since last May. The past year may have felt like beating your head against a wall and not getting anywhere, financially or in your career. You may have felt unlucky. You kinda were. This whole reading is talking about your perception of things needing to change, because Jupiter is getting ready to move into Taurus.
What’s going on in May:
8 Wands:
You could be traveling to see family, or they’re traveling to see you. You could simply be telling them everything is GREAT, when it’s not, and hasn’t been. That message is repeated later. You put on a happy face for the public, for your Insta feed or whatever, but you’re the battle weary soldier, which shows you feeling like you don’t really have support, which is kind of on you…trying to save face or something. 10 Swords, this needs to end, will end 💯 The faking it bit anyway. Be honest, Truth is your first Oracle card. This card being followed by Queen of Cups rev explains WHY you are bullshitting your family/friends/etc.
Queen of Cups rev:
This is you, but she’s out of her element. Normally a very loving, kind, nurturing and friend to everyone sort of personality, in rev she’s overly emotional about everything. Taking things personally. Imagining up situations and slights that aren’t real. A lot of assuming things when they don’t actually speak up to find out the truth. Out of fear of the worst, but you assume the worst anyway. There are worse things with her but I don’t really get them playing a role here, for most, just overreacting and heavy emotions. For some, this could be fear of a family member manipulating your situation, decisions, or emotions into doing what they want, so you don’t tell them the truth. For at least one person, it’s because you know they’re right. Could be a parent. For others, you just know your people 💯 I do get that whatever this is, would be with the best of intentions. When someone sees a Tower coming, they want to avoid it, this could be someone like “get out of the way, do this!” or the family situation itself and an over reactive person is the Tower you’re trying to avoid (or at least this is how you perceive it).
The Sun:
This is a card of happiness, and that is what you’ve desperately tried clinging to with 4 Pentacles. You avoid truth, avoid people in some cases, you’re highly emotional over the truth because you don’t want to see all sides of something. Good AND bad. Which…everything is good and bad in ways, that’s life. You get a dog, you love your dog, dog does irritating things sometimes. MINE does 😆 You’re so resistant to “negativity” that you’ve become resistant to BALANCE. Clarity. Truth. The zodiac signs in this reading, I don’t see actually mattering, this is a very personal reading where no other signs may even be involved. They’re all opposites. Which shows opposite perceptions to everything, opposite experiences. A Capricorn and a Cancer can both look at a bowl, the Cancer is going to get all nostalgic about a bowl grandma had that looks just like it and 🥰memories🥰, they have to have it now, while Capricorn is like “wow what a waste of money, I can get a bowl just as good for a 1/4th of the cost somewhere else, a bowl is a bowl.” Just an example, Cap is a money sign, their points are often frugal. And a lot of your angst is money related. It’s a repeated message of the intuitive one earlier, no one sees things like you see them, others don’t have that DEPTH, that’s why you’re you. But the input of others isn’t wrong either, because other people can see what we can’t. Maybe that bowl is $500, and Cap is right.
In your case, The Sun is about recognizing that you need to release control, negative perceptions or beliefs you’ve built up over the years, stubbornness, possessiveness, jealousy, all internal things. If you’re someone that isn’t frugal and just throws money to the wind wherever, whenever you want, then you have to recognize that. Because the focus is money, dealing with money people that give it to you straight is probably your best option. Those kind of people don’t care about emotions, there is no emotion in “you have to save money”, facts are facts and numbers are numbers with these people. The King of Pentacles in fact. It’s black or it’s white, there is no grey area with money, you save it or you don’t. You spend it wisely or you don’t. Justice shows recognizing truth, and the need to cut off what no longer serves you, for your highest good. Things that cost too much. Pushing away people with solid advice just because you don’t wanna hear it. Emotions in practical situations. Damn I feel like a lecturing parent, exactly the type you’re like ahhh shut up!! 😂 Moving on now 🤦‍♀️
9 Swords:
The good stuff! Just kidding, 9 Swords is being intensely stressed tf out, full of anxiety, worries, these things constantly being on your mind at ALL times. I’m not trying to make light of this (maybe just a hair, it’s intense), there’s a deeper message in the next row. All of this is over money. A new job possibly, if you’ve lost one. It’s only an Ace, you’re over here trying to be a King. Where is the money going to come from next month, the month after? But it’s not a surprise, it’s routine, you avoid the Towers. And avoid change. Which avoids growth. Much of this is self inflicted is what it’s saying, except for those who have lost a job. Maybe more than one. For most of you, this is telling everyone you’re perfect, things are great, putting on a show, but the reality has been grim, very difficult, full of stress, all of the time. You need to communicate your reality, the truth. It is only then that this all changes for you. More so, you accepting the truth yourself. There is a feeling of you trying to swim upstream in violent currents…you’re gonna drown, unless you RELEASE. Keep your head above water, try to float, moving closer to the shore or calmer waters. Where the people are. The only energy here that is not an opposite is Pisces, some of you may have Pisces North Node or Pisces in your chart, because that path is very similar. You have to release the exacting, detail oriented, picky af control of Virgo, trust the universe, and go with where it takes you. Resisting is futile, it’s willing or it’s forced. It’s an act of trust and sacrifice, things WILL change outside of your control, that’s what Wheel of Fortune is, Pisces/Jupiter energy 💯, but you have to believe it’s the best thing for you in the long run 🙏
Just a note that Pluto Capricorn has been opposing you since like 2007/8. It’s just changed to Aquarius, for a short spell. Cancer’s symbolic 8th House (rising’s actual 8th). Things will change, over time, and money plays a big role in 8th dynamics.
6 Cups & Wheel of Fortune:
Actual positive message 🥰 You’ve grown used to the way things have been for a long time for you, much of which has been a struggle. That’s all changing now, and the negative perceptions inside of you, thinking you’re unlucky, others are against you, the world is your opposition (Pluto has been 7th). When planets are in the 7th, there are instances where they are real, and some that are projected. You have to be honest with yourself on who your “enemies” really are, and who you’ve just perceived them to be. I’m getting that your family is not one of them. Maybe one person is difficult. And maybe not anymore, because things are changing. Jupiter is entering Taurus on May 16, conj. Uranus through the 25th, a very lucky financial transit for all signs that vibe with Taurus, including you. It’s a good week to put in effort towards a new horizon with this Fool connected to work. You could get lucky. Saturn has moved to Pisces, also fortunate for you with the trine. Pluto isn’t opposing you anymore, though he’ll be back to tie up loose ends through next year. Delay is saying blessings won’t happen all at once, this is a process, and North Node will be squaring you soon, making it difficult to see what’s “meant” for you, whether you’re on the right path or not. Trust, and go where the currents take you. Become aware of how you’ve made yourself stuck, how others have made you stuck, this has been a karmic or destined cycle of some kind where you’ve felt victimized at some point, and it’s held back your growth. That’s going to end, the Wheel keeps turning and it’s becoming more favorable for you to win, be rewarded for your efforts, a new and better job could be on the horizon. But first, self truths and what feels like shadow work. Abundance for an Oracle is a very good sign.
For a very small percentage, there is a karmic situation where you didn’t give to someone else and now they’re not giving to you. Could be a family member with 10 Cups, and communication is necessary to clear the air and set The Wheel back in motion in this relationship. Or someone felt trapped and victimized and now you do, or have. If it’s family, it’s definitely a karmic connection/experience.
Signs you may be dealing with:
Gemini & Sagittarius, Taurus & Scorpio, Aries & Libra…Pisces on its own.
Oracles: ✨
21 Truth
An honest desire to know and speak the truth produces beneficial results.
64 Actualization
You will achieve your full potential by virtue of your creativity and your honest pursuit of truth.
62 Delay
Confront the natural tendency to delay the finishing of a creative endeavor.
13 Abundance 💰
Abundance takes on many forms: material possessions, friendships, excellent health, emotional stability, unique experiences…
When you lock yourself into a narrow view on what defines abundance, you lose out on the whole picture of what it *could* mean. Open yourself up to as many forms of wealth and abundance that are possible and watch your blessings multiply. Always remember that focusing on what you do not have is a sure-fire way to feed the energy and make that your truth. Every day watch for signs of abundance from the universe - acknowledge and be thankful, thus encouraging the continued flow of energy. Remember the universe will always provide you with what you need.
We enter into May as:
Pink From Pinkton 💗
“I am more than I think I am.”
Pink shows us the process of self-awareness. Are you trying to recapture a past moment that no longer fits? You may have outgrown something, and while it can be a challenge to admit it, being fully who you are is much more glorious than trying to fit yourself into the past. If you are presently upset or struggling with a difficult situation, it may be because you are trying to make something work when it simply can’t. You may be seeking to keep something far less than what you deserve. With self-awareness and discovery comes a new obligation, using your new knowledge. New ideas, projects & opportunities can only come if you stop blocking them.
What is to be learned in May:
Kelly the Green Dragon 🐉:
“The tempter is as guilty as the thief.”
When the need for something outweighs our desire to maintain integrity, we are out of balance. There are several factors to consider, first, are you being honest with yourself? Are you really giving everything you have to give in this situation, or are you just giving up? Are you expecting things to just come easily to you? Consider the motives behind greed, what has left you feeling cheated? Are you sure others let you down, or did you have a sense this was going to happen and ignored the signs? Have you mislead yourself? No matter where we are, we need friends. It could be time to cultivate some new friendships, things may be easier if you ask for help. Don’t be disappointed if it doesn’t come from where you want it to. Often, assistance comes from somewhere we least expect.
Green may be a lucky color 💚
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thisisanedblog69420 · 6 months ago
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OH LORDY ABOUT ME
18+ ONLY. IF YOURE UNDER 18, BLOCK ME.
Name is AM or Lunar. Idk. Call me whatever you want. She/her pronouns plz. 24 years old
Bi / pan / queer whatever you wanna say. Idc, not straight. If you're not LGBTQ+ friendly, leave. I'm white but you can gtfo if you're not BIPOC friendly too. Sorry not sorry, homophobes and racists NOT welcome.
Drunkorexic
Don't care about my stupid fucking weight as much as I stupid fucking should. Welcome to having an ed for over 5 years. I give so much of a shit but am too goddamn lazy to care. Had like 2-3 tumblrs that got offed. Oops.
Masters student and special ed teacher
I have an amazing partner who loves me regardless of weight. He knows about my ed and may make me eat. We love him for it. He wants a healthy gf, not an anorexic one. He's the best and just wants me to be happy / healthy, and is the most supportive and best thing in my life. He is not the toxic partner you see in ed blogs. Say anything bad about him and you will be blocked
I have a degree in psychology. I am not a mental health professional. Do not treat me as such. You may come to me to send memes / get support, but if you are actively in a mental health emergency I am not comfortable or qualified to handle that. Please contact your doctor / a mental health professional / a hotline. Not me.
I AM NOT PRO. THIS DISEASE FUCKING SUCKS. I NEED AN OUTLET. PLEASE DO NOT REPORT. JUST BLOCK. THIS IS ISOLATING AS FUCK AND I NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO.
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dreamyaqua · 3 years ago
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What type of boyfriend would stray kids Hyunjin be like and maybe his ideal type he would go for pls?
Hey how are you ? Can you make hyunjin as your boyfriend and his ideal type plz 💜💜
Could u do a post about ✨Hyunjin ✨ ideal type of girl pls? Like physically <3
I hear you guys~ Finally I'm posting an update that was highly requested. Here we go with Hyunjin - I'm sorry it took me so long to get this done. I hope you'll still like it!!🥺💗
✧・゚:*Hyunjin as a Boyfriend✧・゚:*
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Pisces sun ☀️ Virgo moon 🌙 Pisces mercury 💬 Pisces venus ♀️ Aries mars ♂️
Hyunjin is a very sensitive and emotional boyfriend who will love his partner unconditionally
He's not the type of person who enjoys staying on the surface, he will look deep into his partner and fall in love with what's on the inside
Having his venus in Pisces means that he's got the most self-sacrificing venus sign and he will not hesitate to help out those he loves
He has true empathy for the wellbeing of his loved ones and will be as sweet as possible and try his hardest to keep his partner happy
He pays attention to details and has an understanding and adaptable nature which would make him quite flexible and therefore he'd be a very understanding, considerate, and compassionate boyfriend
Being loved simply makes him feel complete and he's got a natural talent to make you feel loved and appreciated without even trying
He's a generous and caring boyfriend but he can also get loud and crazy and be humorous
With that being said, he loves physical affection, PDA, and cuddles and he'll likely take you on the most romantic dates ever
He's also very artistic, so among those romantic dates, he'd love to have artsy dates with you, maybe do "photoshoot" sessions or go to the beach
He's not the type to flaunt or show-off your relationship, although he wants others to know how happily in love you two are
He thrives on fantasy and wanting to create a love that is like a fairytale - being loved by him would probably be an otherworldly feeling
With that being said, though, he can get easily persuaded or a little delusional, so please don't ever take advantage of him or play with his heart
He's a true romantic at heart and also quite clingy, he'd love to spend A LOT of time cuddling with you and just holding you and being held - I'd guess his predominate love language is physical touch
He seeks to get completely swept up in love, mental and physical intensity and immense emotions would be important to him
Another thing I could see is him wanting to share his passions with you and he'd definitely also want to share his music taste with you
He might get a little stubborn sometimes since he does like to do things his way and he might have a bit of a temper, but if his anger flares up, it's likely to die down quickly again
I could also see him enjoying to get a little competitive with you - when playing games for example
all in all, a super sentimental and sweet boyfriend who will be your knight in shining armour
✧・゚:*Ideal Type✧・゚:*
Hyunjin craves creativity and security in a relationship - he wants to feel needed and be appreciated for everything he does to help
Very important would be a partner who reciprocates his feelings/actions and loves him just as unconditionally as he'd love them
Someone who is giving and wouldn't just take advantage of his kind nature
He has a peaceful relationship in mind, therefore he'd be attracted to someone who's sentimental and gentle and who would hold him when he's sad
He also thrives on dreams and fantasies and has an idealized fairytale type of love in mind - so he'd find someone who's tender-hearted and can turn his romantic ideals into reality highly attractive
He'd find traits like empathy and kindness very appealing and he needs an equally as understanding partner as himself, who's also always there to listen to him and who thinks and communicates in imaginative ways
His ideal type would be someone he can count on, someone who supports him and his passions, work, etc.
On the other hand, he's also attracted to passionate people who've got something going on for themselves - share your passions with him, he'd love to hear
I could also see him being attracted to an artistic person, someone who's into art or who plays an instrument or sings could be very appealing to him
He might also find someone attractive who leads an active lifestyle, combine this with his artistic nature and I could imagine him being into someone who can dance just like him
What's really important to him is that his partner doesn't make empty promises and that they're honest, otherwise he might feel taken advantage of
Also someone who's open with their emotions and whom he can connect to
It's also fine if they can be just as loud and crazy as him, he admires people who are dynamic and down for a challenge but they should be humble and not full of themselves
Last but not least, I feel like he'd be interested in someone who's got a clean and neat appearance, someone who seems organized and helpful and has a soft aura about them
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shingia · 4 years ago
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Could I request Kuroo, Bokuto, Tsukishima, Sakusa, Miya twins, and Tendou with a reader who used to self harm but was sober for a while, only to relapse after they left bc of a huge argument then please and thanks? Sorry if that’s really intense tho. And thank u for being so nice🙂💞
[𝐓𝐖] 𝐒/𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐀𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅-𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐌
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ok i reaaally hope this is what you expected. i didn’t know what kind of ending you wanted but i decided that you, my friend, needed comfort, so i gave you comfort because you deserve it ❤️️
i hope reading this will make you feel better! kisses on your nose ❤️️
type : (strong) angst | word count : 4.4K
warnings : mentions of self-harm, depiction of depressive behavior (plz do not read if any of these might trigger something, i want you all to be safe <3)
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⇀ 𝐤𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐨
« fuck you, kuroo. fuck. you. ». those were the last words you had told him. they had hurt, but they were nothing compared to the last words he had told you, the words that kept playing over and over in your head as you slowly felt yourself drift to your old habits again : « i’m done with you ».
was it your fault ? did you push him over the edge ? you had many questions to ask kuroo, but he wasn’t there to answer anymore. so these thoughts were left spiraling in your head as you started to lose balance between love and pain. because his love used to be the cure to your pain. so now what ? what were you supposed to do other than going back to your old habits ? you couldn’t think of any answer.
on monday morning, you woke up thirty minutes earlier because, first of all, you needed some time for the swelling of your eyes to go down, and second of all, you needed to mentally prepare yourself to see kuroo again. it had been two days since your fight, and he had not manifested himself once. it seemed to be well and truly over ; and that thought had been the main cause of the collapsing of your mental strength over the last two days.
during your first period, although you were avoiding his gaze, kuroo couldn’t help but cast glances in your direction. because he knew you better than anyone, and he could only imagine how hurt you were.
but he really started to get suspicious when he noticed you were not raising your hand to correct today’s homework. he had helped you with that last week, and you had told him that you felt confident enough to propose your correction to the class ; which rarely happened. so why weren’t you raising your hand ?
he had a bad feeling about the answer… he didn’t care about giving you quick glances anymore, he just stared at your arms until one of your movements would make your sleeve reveal just a few inches of your skin.
and he was horrified to have his fears confirmed. the cuts that he had so often kissed while holding you in his arms were back. and he knew it was all because of him. and although his first thought was that it was not his job to heal them anymore, he couldn’t bring himself to act unbothered.
he had loved you for long enough to know that you needed him right now. or maybe he still loved you ? it was not clear, but it didn’t matter right now. what mattered was that he needed you to listen to what he wanted to say, even if that was the last thing you accepted to hear from him.
« y/n, we need to talk » he told you once you got out of the classroom. you looked up at him ; his face was unusually austere. he carefully grabbed your shoulder and took you away from everyone else. 
« i can’t… i couldn’t walk out of there pretending like i didn’t see what your arms looked like » he started. « now listen, i know i fucked up, but i still care. and you still matter. whatever our relationship is doesn’t define you and most importantly, these don’t define you » he pointed at your wrists, his brows furrowed with concern. « so please, i’m begging you, keep in mind that i’m always here if you need to talk. always. and if you don’t want to talk to me that’s fine, but in that case, please find someone else. for the sake of everything we've been through together, don't let everything you’ve accomplished go to waste » and he wrapped his arms around you in the strongest hug he had ever given.
⇀ 𝐛𝐨𝐤𝐮𝐭𝐨
it had already been a week. and bokuto had absolutely no idea what to do. call you ? text you ? probably not. what would he even say ? « hi, sorry for slamming the door in your face after screaming at you for fifteen minutes. am i still your boyfriend ? » awful idea.
and while bokuto was pondering every option he had left to get in touch with you, you were left in the darkest place of your mind. and you hadn’t felt like that in a few months. because bokuto used to always be there, his number on speed dial whenever you feared you would relapse. and thanks to his unwavering support, you hadn’t. but was there anything in this world that was truly unwavering ? you really started to doubt it. and now that bokuto had left you, what could carry the pain away ? whatever the answer was, you were in no condition to think rationally about it.
you remembered how he used to celebrate every improvement in your mental health, how strong of a cornerstone he had been for you. and just the fact of not knowing where you guys were at after your fight was enough to make you feel like you were drowning again.
you were overflowing with emotions that you thought you couldn’t control, and apart from holding on tight to bokuto’s chest, you only knew one way to feel better.
you loved him, you really did. but after a week without hearing from him, you started to think that maybe his feelings were not as real as he pretended they were. and how could you not blame him for that ? for letting you down so fast ?
curled up in your bed, tears were streaming down your face ; because you felt weaker than you had promised yourself to be. you were exhausted, in every sense of the word, yet there was still a tiny bit of strength left in your body that made you grab your phone and open your conversation with bokuto. the last message was a bitter pill to swallow : « no problem babe, i’m always here for you ». it was just a week ago but it felt like an eternity had passed. your fingers started slowly typing on the screen and immediately hit sent, knowing that you would second guess your message if you re-read it. « can we talk? », just three words, it was the maximum you could get off of your chest right now.
but bokuto did not answer. for the simple reason that he was too busy catching his breath in front of your door. he frantically knocked, not stopping until you opened it.
« oh my god, are you okay ?! » he exclaimed, patting your entire body like he wanted to make sure you were well and truly there. and once he had made sure of that, he pulled you against his chest like he wasn’t planning on letting you go ever again. « did- did you… » he ventured to ask, not wanting to finish his sentence precisely because he was afraid of your answer. but when he heard you let out a muffled sob against his chest, his fears instantly got replaced by guilt. more than he had ever felt. « you’re alright, i got you. i got you now… » he murmured, his hands stroking your back tenderly. « we’ll get through this together, ok ? we’ll show the world how strong you are. because i know you are. »
⇀ 𝐬𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐬𝐚
yes, sakusa had run away. and he was glad he had. because he knew how hurtful he could be with his words, and he had enough respect not to inflict that to you. but as he made his way back home, doubt started installing in his head. what if he shouldn’t have left you after your fight ? he immediately shook the thought away. no, you were good now. you were better. nothing like who you were when he met you.
and sakusa could be very convincing when he needed to, including with himself. that’s why he didn’t get in touch with you for the next three days, because he thought you just needed some time for yourself.
but when he received a worried text from komori when he got out of the gym after practice, he changed his mind within seconds. « i just saw y/n, something felt off. maybe you should check on them ? ».
sakusa felt a wave of guilt descend upon of him. of course he should. it was his fucking job to offer you his help, even when he thought you didn’t need it. and especially when he knew what you had already been through. he cursed himself all the way to your house, where he could only imagine how lonely you felt. not wanting to waste any more time, he pulled out his phone to call you. and heaved a relieved sigh at the sound of your voice : « hey, are you ok ? like, right now are you doing ok ? » he asked hastily. 
you sat on your bed and rubbed your strained eyes, fiddling with the cloth of your t-shirt. « i- yeah, i’m good… » you lied. « i’m at your door, open up please, i gotta see you » he said before hanging up.
you knew sakusa was not going to take no for an answer. so, after wiping your tears and putting on a long-sleeved hoodie and sweatpants, you went to open the door. 
« hi… » you uttered quietly. sakusa didn’t dare to move. he had been so determined to get to your house, but now that you were standing in front of him, he wasn’t so sure of what he was supposed to do.
you decided to be the first to break the silence,  « i’m okay. and i’m sorr… » « sorry. about everything. » he pre-empted you. seeing you like this made him fear the worst. so he gently grabbed your wrists like he wanted to hold your hands, when in reality he just wanted to confirm his thoughts. and when he saw you stiffen at his touch, he knew he had guessed right. « come here » he whispered before going in for a hug. but you pulled away at the last second. « can we… go to my room ? i- i feel better there » you asked timidly.
he didn’t even answer and simply wrapped his arm around your shoulder before taking you to your bedroom where you immediately curled up on your bed. you didn’t want sakusa to see you like this, but you were in no position to fight back anymore. quietly, he laid beside you and pulled you in a warm embrace, just tight enough to let you know that he got you now. 
when he noticed you were trying to find something to say, to explain yourself, he shushed you with a kiss on your shoulder. « you don’t have to speak if you don’t want to. but i want you to listen to me very carefully : don’t ever think that you’re back to square one now. you’ve dealt with this before, you’ve grown and you can do it again as long as you promise yourself to get back up. and i won’t leave your side. you deserve so much more than what you give yourself, and i’m here to remind you »
⇀ 𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐦𝐚
tsukishima’s pride was important to him, everyone knew it. the only thing he valued as much as his pride was probably you. but during your arguments, the scale always tipped in his pride’s favor, you simply could not compete.
but surprisingly enough, it was you who had told him to go away after getting in the most heated argument you had ever had. and he didn’t have to be told twice : you had shattered his beloved pride, and he was not going to stay here begging for your mercy.
he still loved you, but he also had no problem ignoring you at school. yet for some reason, this argument didn’t sit well with him. well, no arguments ever sat well with him, but today felt different. 
ignoring you was one of the most hurtful things tsukishima could ever do to you. he had helped you through so much, and suddenly becoming a stranger to him was slowly bringing you back down.
« it’s just one time, i won’t relapse » you thought the first time you tried to cope with the pain the way you used to. but you feared it wouldn’t be just one time. you were diving into what you had said goodbye to ; but now that tsukishima was ignoring you, there was no one to stop you from falling, right ? 
well, that would have been true if he hadn’t kept a discreet but attentive eye on you. which is why he knew very well that you had gone back to your old habits. and he needed to do something about it.
but he wasn’t good with words, and he feared that actions would not be enough this time. he needed something more permanent, something that you could keep with you all the time. so he decided to do something he had never done before, and gave it to you as soon as it was done…
receiving a letter from tsukishima was definitely not something you expected. but what was written in it was even less expected.
« i’m not the best at this kind of stuff, but… i really need you to stop being so hard on yourself. i know it’s not something i usually say, but i fell in love with you because i learned to love your imperfections. and you have to start doing the same about yourself. please. and if you need to be held, to be listened to, i’ll be there. but i wanted to write something because i want you to be able to read this as much as you need, as much as you want. i want you to get better, but even more than that, i want you to want to get better. you can do it, i believe in you more than you can think. please come to me if you need it. i love you ».
the tears that streamed down your face had a salty taste, but for the first time in a long time, they tasted like hope as well. and the next time you came face to face with yourself and your thoughts, your eyes found find their way back to the letter, and you knew that there were people that still believed in you, counted on you, loved you. tsukki was just the first one of a long list. (<3)
⇀ 𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐮
he had been there through everything. more than you would have imagined. which is probably why you felt desperately empty ever since he got so angry at you that he left without looking back. but at the time, it simply had not crossed his mind that you would suffer so deeply from his words.
but you did. a lot. and that was the reason you found yourself crying on your bedroom floor, not even able to be mad at anyone but yourself.
still oblivious to the true damage, atsumu thought he could get back to you by pretending like nothing had happened. he often did that because, to him, what was in the past belonged in the past. except that today, and in your situation, it could not work.
« wanna grab something to eat ? » was the first text he sent you. and you didn’t feel like answering, so you didn’t. « are you still mad ? i’m not <3 » was the second one. but you still didn’t feel like answering. maybe it was your fault ? maybe you were overreacting while you were just supposed to play it cool like he did ? but you would have played it cool if you knew how to.
when atsumu decided to go to your house, it was initially to apologize in person. he had not planned on seeing you looking the way you did, which was a heart-wrenching reminder of the dark period of time you had gotten through together. but here he was, standing in front of you, feeling more helpless than ever. he knew too well the look into your eyes, one that he hadn’t seen in a long time. 
he dropped the pack of snacks he was holding in his hands before cupping your cheeks. « oh no, no, no. i fucked up, didn’t i ? i am… so so so sorry. c-can you forgive me ? » he stammered, absolute panic in his eyes as he took you in his arms. why would i have to forgive you ? you thought. i’m the only one to blame. 
but atsumu seemed to also hear the things you didn’t say, and he refused to let you feel guilty for anything. ever so gently, he took your hands in his before placing the softest kisses on your wrists that were still covered by the sleeves of your hoodie. « i probably won’t ever forgive myself for leaving you alone. but promise me you’ll always come to me if you need help, or any kind of support, hugs, kisses… you name it. i’ll be your coping mechanism, and i’ll be the best you’ve ever had »
and he kept holding you for a long time, at least until he felt your breath become steady again. and if you thought atsumu was doting before, prepare yourself to be even more amazed now.
⇀ 𝐨𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮
fighting with osamu was not frequent, fortunately. but when fights occured, it was bad. really bad. he tended to think that you could endure as much as atsumu when it came to harsh words ; but you couldn’t.
kind of like his brother, samu had a tendency to leave the past behind and pretend like nothing happened when he got in touch with you after a fight. and that’s what he did a week ago, after one of the biggest arguments that you had ever had.
too happy that he seemed to still want to be your boyfriend, you didn’t have the courage to tell him how you had gone back to your old habits during the time you were on bad terms. but as they said, old habits died hard, and your destructive thoughts were still very present even when things seemed to have gotten back to normal.
yet samu was not blind, and he noticed that you were acting a bit more distant since last week, since your fight. but he still thought that your problems could be solved by just keeping on pretending like everything was ok. and eventually, things would turn out ok by themselves, right ?
you were laying on his bed, turned on your side as you scrolled on your phone. usually you would have had an arm swung around him, but you didn’t want to take any risk, so you kept your distances. 
« hey, come closer baby. we’ve barely cuddled today » he told you before lazily wrapping his arm around your waist.
feeling nervous, you swallowed the lump in your throat before putting your phone on the nightstand. « i’m going to sleep, samu », you said, stretching your arm to turn off the light.
but he was quicker than you and gently grabbed your arm, careful not to apply any pressure on it. his eyes widened, he had barely seen your wrist but it had been enough to notice that the scars were recent. he put two and two together and looked at you dead in the eyes ; you looked ashamed, and it broke his heart. « when did y- was it because of me ? » he asked, his voice faintly shaking. you pulled away from his hand and held your arm against you, sinking in the pillow. « no, of course not. it’s nothing » you breathed out, looking away to avoid his gaze. but he was quick to make you face him again, with a slight pressure of his fingertips on your red cheeks. « there’s only one thing that i hate more than seeing you in pain. it’s knowing that i caused this pain. let me help you, y/n. please. you deserve to feel better. i’m sorry i didn’t give you as much love as you gave me. and i’m sorry for behaving like an asshole when you needed me. just… fuck, i just love you ».
tears started prickling the corner of your eyes, but he saw you trying to hold them back. with the most gentle look in his eyes, he proposed to turn off the light if it made you feel better. and you nodded ; you knew that you’d eventually had to have a face-to-face conversation with him. it was the only way to get better. but right now you just wanted to be held without thinking about what he’d see. or wouldn’t see.
so he turned off the light and let yourself get comfortable in bed before wrapping you in his embrace once again. his soft breath against your neck was obviously not enough to make all your pain magically go away, but it let you know that he had your back. and it was all that mattered.
⇀ 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐮
« i don’t want to do this anymore, y/n ! » tendou had yelled, making this sentence the peak of your argument. six words, and they were on replay in your minds since four days. you couldn’t believe that almost two years of relationship had ended so abruptly. but you had to face the truth : tendou had enough of you. and obviously you linked that to the turbulent start of your relationship. you knew it hadn’t been easy for him to deal with your self harm when you had just started dating. yet he had managed to make you feel so much better that you had been sober for about a year, all thanks to him. but maybe you hadn’t been grateful enough ? maybe that was why he had decided to end things now ?
the only thing you knew for sure was that he was gone, and you felt like you had lost your anchor.
you had spent the weekend in your dorm, and it had been a painful weekend. so painful that you did not get out of bed on monday morning ; it was just too much to handle. deep down you knew that you were not handling your problems the right way… and escaping reality was not viable.
but little did you know that tendou wanted nothing more than to see you again in the hallways and finally have a heart-to-heart conversation with you. and when he didn’t see you in class, he started to freak out. he knew how it was to feel alone and rejected ; and he started to fear that he had caused you to feel exactly that. so he did not follow his friends to the cafeteria at lunch and headed to your dorm instead, hoping that you’d open the door.
and you did. thank god you did. but panic started bubbling in his chest when his eyes laid on your face.
« alright, come here » he told you with a forced smile before pulling you in his embrace. truthfully, he didn’t feel like smiling, but he knew that the last thing you needed was to think you made him feel bad. when he was with you, his main goal was to cheer you up, he’d deal with himself later. « angel… did you do it again ? » he asked, his tone being the furthest thing from judgmental. you muttered a quiet apology, your face buried in his white uniform jacket. but something lingered on your mind. angel ? it sounded right, but you knew it wasn’t. not anymore. « don’t apologize ! the only person you owe an apology to is yourself » he whispered against your ear. slowly, he put his hands on your waist before bringing you to your bed where he sat right next to you, still refusing to take his hands off of your body.
 « tendou, you don’t have to do this… » you muttered, knowing that you weren’t supposed to be this close anymore. « i’m your ex, you don’t owe me anything ».
he immediately looked down to meet your eyes, an eyebrow raised in confusion. « your ex ? wh- you think i broke up with you ? y/n, when i said that i didn’t want to do this anymore, i was talking about fighting with you ! i’m sorry, i should have texted you these last few days, but i thought you wouldn’t want to talk to me »
a tear rolled down your cheek. tendou’s words sounded like heaven right now. maybe you weren’t alone after all ?
« now, do you need me to get you something ? band-aids ? anything ? » he asked, caressing your hair with his right hand. you nodded your head no and kept your head buried in his neck, like you were waiting for his scent to go to your head. « i know you’ve been through a lot, and i’m proud of you no matter what. but, you know… even though i have enough love for the both of us, i’d really want you to have enough love for yourself » he said and placed a kiss on top of your head, waiting for you to say something. but he sensed that you were not ready yet. and he was ok with that, the last thing he wanted to do was to pressure you. it was going to be a long path, but you had already done it, and you were going to do it again. and he’d be there the whole time.
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ok so if you’ve read until there it probably means that you needed comfort (i hope i have given you enough) : so if you are in this situation yourself, PLEASE don’t be afraid to ask for help, you can and you will get better. i’m rooting for you like saeko roots for karasuno ❤️️
@toworuu (didn’t forget about you ^^)
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Text
The Brother’s Reaction to MC having a Nightmare
bAby
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this gif... holy SHIT 
Lucifer
Whether you started the evening snuggled up under his chin or all alone in your room, he’s an extremely light sleeper since he’s got to keep an ear out for Mammon being stupid at 2 am
So when you start to move restlessly and/or whimper and cry, naturally he’ll awaken and see what the issue is
Lucifer will sit up and gently rest a tentative hand on your trembling shoulder, so as not to startle you
His presence only seemed to make it worse! Your tears got bigger and your cries got louder, your breathing became more uneven until you woke with a start, your own shrill scream scaring you into a frightened, crying ball in front of him
Boi is at a loss…
Was this his fault?
“MC, darling, what has gotten into you? Are you alright?”
“L-Lucifer?” You whimper, watery eyes roving aimlessly in the darkness “L-L-Lucifer?! Where are-”
Wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close, he reassures you: “I’m here, right here princess,” “I’ve got you, it was just a dream MC... nothing to worry about.”
Strokes your head, smoothing your rumpled hair and supporting your back while you hide your puffy, tearstained face in his collar and cling to him for dear life until you calm down
You’re still shaking when the usually stiff demon presses a kiss to the crown of your head and begins to rock from side to side, murmuring gentle, reassuring words in your ear
“Nothing can hurt you as long as you’re in my arms, MC.” “Deep breaths my love, deep breaths…”
Mammon’s vivid scary stories before bed had obviously been a bad decision, Lucifer decided as he dabbed your cheeks with a kleenex
his poor, sweet human having nightmares about silly campfire tales…
How endearing, yet upsetting
He’ll carry you to the kitchen bridal style and hold you close after getting you a glass of water, then carry you back to bed and tuck you safely against his broad chest for the rest of the night making a mental note to hang Mammon upside down from the banister the following morning
Mammon
He woke up from his dream about goldie who had read “∞” on the ATM and opened his door in answer to the frantic knock to find his favorite human crying
You rushed into his arms, burying your face in his chest to hide your shuddering sobs, nearly sending the now blushing Avatar of Greed off balance in your haste
“Jeez, human! Wha… What happened? Why’re ya crying like that?”
No, like seriously, plz stop crying babie or he’s gonna cry too
Returns the hug, holding MC firmly as he regains his footing and manages to shut the door behind you
“MC, sssh, I’m right here! You don’t hafta worry, ok? Luckily you’ve got the best demon on the job to make ya feel better! Hug me as hard as ya need, ok?”
*forehead and cheek smooches*
Lets you curl up in his lap until you can talk to him without stuttering or choking on tears
Holds you the whole time, almost as if he’s afraid to let go for fear you’ll cry again
“Bad dream? What was it about?”
“Th-Those characters from Levi’s horror game w-were eating you alive and I c-couldn’t move!” You whimper tearfully, “You were begging me for help a-and I couldn’t do anything to save you from them because every time I moved th-these ropes got t-tighter around my neck a-an-”
First of all, he’s horrified that Levi showed you those games when he knew they gave you nightmares. Unfortunately, you had to if you didn’t want to be called a normie for the billionth time that week
Second, he, the great Mammon, begging a mere human for help? Yeah right
Even though he knew in his heart of hearts that that would definitely be the case
“They’re not real, remember that. And if you still think those freaks are lurking in the dark, come find me and the great Mammon will protect you!”
You can't help but giggle and hug him more tightly, knocking him back onto his pillow
Neither of you felt like moving, so Mammon pulls the sheets up over your shoulders and you snuggle together until the morning comes
At the breakfast table, Mammon doesn’t hesitate to screech at Levi for giving you nightmares while cradling your tired, sleep-deprived body against him
Leviathan
Doesn’t hear MC’s knock at first, he’s too absorbed in the 14th episode of I Was Eating Avocado Salmon Sushi at a Hundred-Yen Revolving Sushi Restaurant When Suddenly I Was Thrown Back in Time a Thousand Years to the Heian Era, Where I Was Selected to Be a Personal Chef for a Princess and Was Later Chosen as a Possible Candidate to Be Her Husband… Now someone Please Tell Me How That’s Even Possible
As the knocking gets louder and more frantic, the otaku finally notices and pauses the anime, goes to the door and opens it a tiny bit
Just enough to see the teary-eyed MC, hugging their waist in discomfort, shivering in fear, and looking left and right down the hall for danger
“... Yeah?”
“L-Levi? C-Can I come in? *sniff* I just had a really scary dream-”
“I-uh… Ummm I g-guess,”
He lets you in and on a whim, places a tentative hand on your back
He expected you to push him away, but when you choked and rushed into his half-open arms and buried your face in his chest, leviachan.exe has stopped working
EXIT
What was he supposed to do with his hands?!?!??
MC was crying and he was just standing there like a normie? Wh… WhAt wOULd HenRy dO?
“MC, h-hey, it cant’ve been that bad… here, um let’s s-sit down a-and you can talk to me. Sound good?”
He feels you nod and leads you to his large gaming beanbag chair and you get squooshed against his side, shivering and sniveling, but warm and safe
Levi dries your face with the edge of his shirt and after a few moments of comfortable silence, you begin to explain your dream
The slimy creatures scaling the walls of the House of Lamentation with their slimy entrails dripping whitish goo in their wake. Eight spindly legs to each monster, sixteen sinister red eyes, and countless rows of gleaming fangs ready to take a chunk out of anyone who came too close
They managed to get into the house and they chased you and the brothers, but the otaku had tripped over a fallen suit of armor and a spider creature made its move before he could get away
At that point, you’d woken up absolutely terrified and rushed to see if Levi was ok
“But you’ve played horror games with me and we watched My Sister and I Found a Spider and Took It Home, Realizing Soon After it Was a Demon Who Eventually Escaped From the Glass Jar We Used for a House and Ate Our Toes, Transporting Us To Hell Where We Were F-”
“Yeah… I know… B-But it wasn’t that bad. I was reading one of the books Satan recommended. It was a really well-written horror story and it had very realistic pictures. I just can’t seem to get those gross monsters out of my head:(”
Your voice slowly trailed off and Levi realized what he had accomplished
You… You weren’t crying anymore!!
Also, you weren’t breathing really hard or shaking too much! Had… had this yucky otaku really calmed the human down?
*gasp* he was rubbing your back too!? And you hadn’t slapped his icky hands away?
You… you were ok with this? B-Being all snuggled up together on the beanbag chair?
“L-Levi, I-I’m ok now. I’ll leave you alone… I hope I didn’t wake you up…”
“N-No!”
“Something wrong?”
“No… I-um,” (he couldn’t let you get away now! This was perfect! He had you all to himself!! No WAY was he gonna screw this up!!) “You c-can stay a little longer if you’d like… I-I was in the middle of I Was Eating Avocado Salmon Sushi at a Hundred-Yen Revolving Sushi Restaurant When Suddenly I Was Thrown Back in Time a Thousand Years to the Heian Era, Where I Was Selected to Be a Personal Chef for a Princess and Was Later Chosen as a Possible Candidate to Be Her Husband… Now someone Please Tell Me How That’s Even Possible… Do you maybe want to stay and watch?”
“You don’t mind? I don’t want to intrude-”
“No! It’s fine!”
And so he fumbled with the remote and hit the play button, but couldn’t focus on a single word the protagonists were saying
You. Fell. Asleep.
On. Him.
Uh
“Maybe… Maybe MC doesn’t think I’m a… ‘yucky otaku’ after all… But don’t get your hopes up, Levi.”
Satan
He fell asleep in his chair, book resting on his chest when he heard a short, quick (almost frantic) string of taps on his door
Being a light sleeper (just like his papa), he immediately woke up to hear your voice on the other side of the door
“Satan? Are… Are you awake? *sniffle*”
It was you
What could you possibly want at this hour?
Upon opening the door, your body crashed into his own, but not before impulsively throwing your arms around his neck and breaking down on his shoulder
“M-MC? Are you alright?”
No, you weren’t
Judging by your stormy sobs and trembling figure, something must have shaken you up horribly for you to act like this
The sweet MC he knew usually kept their cool
He leads you to his big armchair and sits you down, careful to keep a firm hand on your back for support, both emotional and physical
Your eyes were wide and glassy, pupils darting to each corner of the room looking for monsters, bad demons, giant bugs, etc.
Finding none, you finally make shy eye contact with the blonde demon who has kept his arms close about you and dabbed your endless tears away until you were calm enough to speak
“MC, did you have a night terror or something?”
“*sniffle* M-hm. I-I’m sorry S-Satan, I was just so scared I c-couldn’t stay in my room all alone and you were the first person I thought of. So… I ran here. Did I wake you?”
“I fell asleep in my chair again MC. So I would have awakened during the night anyway,” He replied, “Plus, I don’t mind at all. I’m… I’m happy you came. What was your dream about?”
“It was really twisted… are you sure you want to know?”
“You’ll feel better when you talk about it and I’m always up for a story.” He smiled.
He sat back in his chair tentatively resting your head on his chest as you began describing the terrors from only minutes before
“Asmodeus and I, we watched some of those cringey teen romance movies this afternoon and somehow they morphed into a really scary dream. You and I, the rest of your brothers, the angels, Solomon, Diavolo, and even Barbatos were playing spin the bottle for some reason and I landed on you, but when I kissed you, you turned to dust! Th-Then when I landed on Mammon and Beel, the s-same thing happened again, but no one seemed to notice! Th-”
Noticing you were getting worked up again, Satan rubbed soothing circles into your back, hushing you gently and assuring you that everything was fine and ‘innocent’ kissing games weren’t actually deadly
Unless they were
But he didn’t mention that to you at that moment
Instead, he cradled you in his lap and read to you until your eyelids began to droop once more for some much-needed sleep
Being the good boy he is, he tucked you into his bed
BUT
Before he could walk back to his chair
“Satan, aren’t… aren’t you gonna lay with me?” You ask, tired, sweet voice ringing in his ears, “I-If you don’t mind that is. I mean it is your bed, after all, I didn’t mean t-”
He’s blushing up to his ears at your request, but nonetheless rolls onto the mattress next to you and you snuggle up close and fall asleep almost instantly
“As long as you’re here with me, you’ll be safe MC.”
Asmodeus
Why… Why was he up so early? What was that noise? Wait… Where were you?
He could’ve sworn he fell asleep with you in his arms
Sitting up groggily he looked around after rubbing the crust of sleep from his eyes
Something was moving and whimpering next to him, caught in a snare of fluffy blankets
The fearful cries of “Asmodeus! Oh, Asmo please don’t die! No, no, no, NO!!” broke the sweet demon’s heart
Your ragged breathing turned to a blood-curdling scream and you shot upright, but the blankets blocking your vision increased your tearful unease tenfold and you began struggling even harder against them
Taking action, Asmo tugged at the sheets, doing everything he could to help you
When your face emerged from the heap, you took a great gasp of air and immediately began sobbing your heart out
Asmo paused, knowing it unwise to approach someone who’d just escaped the clutches of a nightmare, but he couldn’t just sit there and stare at you!
Luckily, you chose that moment to look around
Your eyes met his amber ones in the semi-darkness and you tackled him, wrapping him in an impossibly tight hug
“A-ASMO!”
“Darling, wh-”
“Oh my god! I thought I killed you! I r-ruined your pretty face! You just sh-shriveled up a-and-”
“Sweetheart, hey~” He murmured, closing his arms around your back and cradling the back of your head in his hand, “Don’t cry anymore, Asmo’s here…”
His gentle comforting coos as he rocked from side to side brought your tears to a halt and soon you were able to look him in the face
Your glassy, frightened eyes had almost a look of reverence when you ever so slightly cupped your palm over his cheek, afraid he would crumble away at your caress once more
When he didn’t, you let out a shaky sigh of relief and visibly relaxed; shoving your face in his shoulder and wrapping your legs and arms around him so he couldn’t escape
It was quiet for a moment
Asmodeus settled his forearms around your waist and said
“Dearest, are you alright?”
“I… I don’t know.”  You fisted his shirt in your palms and looked at him, “That was a really vivid one.”
“Tell me what it was about!” He smiled sympathetically and stroked your cheek, “I have bad dreams sometimes too, MC. If you tell me yours I’ll tell you a few of mii-iiine!”
You couldn’t help but crack a small grin as his sweet tone and nod
“Yesterday Beel told me about the one time he touched Satan’s favorite plant. He’d seen Satan pet the stalk and petals before and he wanted to do it too. (Satan is a plant dad, fight me) But when he touched it, it shriveled up and died on the spot. I… I had a dream where I touched you and you shriveled up! I tried to help you, but every time I touched you, you screamed in pain! Then… Then you died in my arms and I woke up.”
:(
You clung to the demon as he moved, lost in thought. Settling back into the abundant pillows and tugging a sheet over your shoulders, he began to speak
“That sounds absolutely terrifying! What would you do without me?”
“Asmo…”
“I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” He nuzzled your cheek and hugged you tighter, “Why don’t we find a way to help you forget about it? I have a couple of suggestions… if you’d like to hear them~”
Beelzebub
He’d only been gone for a minute… or four… maybe five…? Right?
Why were you writhing around like that? You sounded like a lost little puppy and… were those tears?
“MC? Are you awake?”
No reply, just your continued whines of discontent and a steady stream of tears soaking the pillow
He dropped his snacks on the floor and carefully knelt on the edge of the mattress, putting a gentle hand on your forehead
Lucifer used to do that when he was sick, long ago when they still lived in the celestial realm. Maybe it would help you? Somehow? Hopefully?
The strangled sob that fell from your lips as you forced his hand away broke his big heart in two
Hold on, your eyes were closed! Wait, you were having a bad dream!
Throwing all caution to the wind (and not knowing the consequences of waking someone in this state) and began shaking you rather roughly, scaring you awake and making you bonk heads when you sat up too quickly
Now you were crying for more reasons than one
Your head hurt, two big scary hands had your shoulders in a tight grip, there was a large figure looming over you in the dark, your dream was still raging and replaying in your head, and it was really dark and uncomfortably warm
Even in the dim light, Beel witnessed the look of pure terror that crossed your face
You thought his heart was broken? Well it just fucking shattered
You were scared? Of him?
“MC, it’s just me! Don’t be afraid!”
He’d woken you up, but apparently he’d only made things worse…
Beel is vewy sowwy :(
Those lovely amethyst eyes…
“B… Beeley?”
“MC? I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, I didn-”
You silence the ginger demon by throwing yourself into his arms in unparalleled relief, afraid you hadn’t really woken up and the shadow of your favorite brother was just MC’s Nightmare, Continued
Happy you’re in his arms, he squeezes back with all his might and burying his face in your shoulder
“I just had the worst nightmare Beel. I’m so happy you’re here…” You murmur, wiping your nose on your sleeve.
“Is your head ok?”
“M-hm.”
The pair of you sit in comfortable silence for a few moments, Beel offers you a tissue to dry your face, but you can’t seem to stop crying
“MC, maybe if you told me about it, you’d feel better!”
His sweet, honest smile made you melt
But the contents of your dream… You looked guiltily toward the bed on the other side of the room where you knew the Avatar of Sloth was sleeping peacefully
“You… You promise not to tell Belphie?”
“What do you mean?”
“W-Well I dreamt about that time… you know… when he killed me? He gave me a hug before bed like he always does a-and I love Belphie’s hugs but I can’t help but think about... that. I feel bad, it’s the same as holding a grudge! I’m sorry Beel.”
*insert pikachu face meme* = beel
“Why are you apologizing? It’s not your fault you had the dream.”
“I know… I feel bad though. Did I wake you up?” You ask, changing the subject.
“Nuh-uh. I was already up grabbing snacks.” He pointed to the untidy pile a few feet away. “Maybe some TSL and food will bring your smile back. Don’t worry about your dream MC, the secret is safe with me. Plus, you’re only human and I guess being killed would be really scary for you. I didn’t protect you that time, but if anyone ever tries to hurt you again, I’ll be there before you can say Burgers from Akuzon, ok?”
The smile lifts your lips before he finishes his sentence warms his heart and puts a happy smile on his own as you give him a final squeeze and whisper
“Thanks a lot, Beeley.”
Belphegor
It is said the Avatar of Sloth could sleep through anything, even the loudest storm and the echoes of 4th of July from the human world
But when the precious human cuddled up in his arms every night begins to move around and/or whimper in fear, Belphegor is awake in minutes only to find you squirming away from him and begging to some invisible entity “Just… Just d-don’t hurt them! I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry, please don’t hurt me I-”
The seventh born is squeezing your hand and whispering encouragement in your ear, telling you you’re safe and that it’s just a dream
Slowly opening your eyes you look around, still terrified and jumpy from your vision, but the warm hand intertwined with yours and the comforting arm around your back, plus the familiar scents of the twins’ room slowly bring you back to reality
“MC?”
“Belphie? I-Is that you?”
“Who else would it be, dummy.”
You ignore the half hearted insult and bury your face in his chest, allowing your heart to reach a normal pace and his natural scent and warmth to wash over you
“Tell me about it. Sounded pretty scary.”
“I’m sorry for waking you up Belphie, I know how you hate losing sleep…”
“Just… Be quiet and tell me your dream!”
“S-Sorry… Um, so I didn’t know you too well yet and an angel came and took the precious grimoire, but me and Beel were caught up in it and there was this whole thing with Purgatory Hall and Luke and-”
“Your stories can put me right to bed you know that? Anyway, so what happened? Did Lucifer tear the angel’s head off?” He looked rather hopeful…
“Of course not! Lucifer was gonna make me choose who I wanted to save, either Beel or Luke and I didn’t want either of them to get hurt so I said ‘both’ and Lucifer got really mad and scary and in my dream he ended up hurting Luke and Beel and he would’ve gotten me if you hadn’t woken me up.”
“You’re welcome.”
“... *sigh* Thanks for listening Belphie.”
With a sigh of his own, he pulled you into his arms, resting his chin on your shoulder
“It was just a dream. You don’t have to be afraid, you know. I’m right here for you. Always.”
“Aww, than-”
“Forget I said that! Shut up and go to sleep!”
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jnixz · 3 years ago
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🥖 🗡 🛏 for ford Cruller, Compton Boole, and Otto mentallis plz
For this Headcanon Ask Meme 
----------------
🥖- Food headcanon
Ford
Can stomach anything, and will try anything that it borders on very strange categories and thinks its fine. Has a larger preference over simple dishes that are greatly exaggerated in its form, specially if he made it.
Despite Chef Cruller taking a week to make a burger, be it a joke or reality, he can actually make the meals appropriate for the campers' meal time. It's just that If you ask him for a Burger that he greatly delays in for some reason (Likely related to someone fond of burger, and particularly likes the way he made them. He doesn't quite remember why but he thinks they deserve the nothing more than a half-assed grilled patty because he keeps teleporting everywhere and messing up with the stove...). Otherwise, if there is a BBQ party happening, you could let him handle the grill. Post-PN2 he does invite people to have a BBQ party once Helmut's body has recovered enough to join in.
Compton
Had precious family recipes passed down to him that started his interest in cooking. Watching cooking shows actually help him improve on his skills. He likes to figure out how to make a dish he has seen on his own. He also like making new recipes for people he likes. He gets a bit of a heart attack watching with how his grandniece cooks and genuinely hopes that maybe he could help lessen the lethality of her recipes by cooking with her (and maybe even how to properly manage her animal assistants).
Otto
An absolute foodie. Would love to eat whatever his friend makes and gives genuine feedback on what they make. One thing that helped Compton open up to the group when he joined was Otto complimenting and supporting him about his cooking. He just get them from other people to not waste time cooking and spend more time science-ing! A frequent thing that helps him whenever he is working on a project or in a stressful situation is food. He can sufficiently cook on his own but doesn't think it is as tasty. May have teared up a little bit when Ford finally made him burger again.
🗡- Badass headcanon
Ford
Is still frightening even as Fragments and has fought off intruders who decided that he can easily be taken care of. Big mistake. This man is still threatening even without using psychic powers, and will use the power of everyday tools and experience of a hard-worker.
Ironically, being fragmented improved his proficiency in Teleporting and allowed him a unique expertise on the power. He can quite literally be in numerous places at once by combining it with the power of Projection. Of course he doesn’t always do this, unless he needs to actively interact with people on different locations. 
(Hard to explain what I have envisioned but this is basically me sharing that I totally have a fic wip where fragments face off intruders at the same time)
Compton
When he was an active agent, he is somehow very good at breaking into places. He can easily ask animals to scout for him and lead him to the best possible routes in missions. He is also very good at coordinating large scale attacks. He is also still have powerful blastokinesis, and has learned more how to control it. Still, he prefers not to use it unless it is necessary or when he is alone, minimum amount of possible casualties around him. He prefers zoolepathy since they can be more flexible in solving things without the use of force.
Otto
He doesn't often get called for missions as firepower, and would often be more on the support and technical side of things. However, he is very good at going undercover and often use his little sleight of hand magic tricks to precure things in the middle of a mission without anyone noticing. Speaking of Magic Tricks, he is also very good at diverting attention or causing distraction without casting suspicion on him (he can casually shrug it off as being an eccentric fellow with an amiable smile on his face). 
While he’d rather not fight, he does learn how to sucker-punch someone. He also often little trick to catch someone off guard and give him an advantage on situations
🛌- Sleep headcanon
Ford - other post
Early riser and had a pretty decent sleep schedule before everything went down. It broke down the more scattered he became. His body clock retains the early morning wake up hours, which is not a good thing when he gets his sleep interrupted all night.
Compton
If he doesn’t drink tea he might have a bit of trouble getting to sleep so he reads books instead. Very good at telling bed time stories. Likes to have background noise of some kind, usually music, to fall asleep to. snores but its the *snork mimimi* kind
Otto
Actually has a decent sleep schedule, although will sleep in late if he doesn't have any work to do. Likes sleeping in a cold environment accompanied by tons of blankets. Does a little bit of light reading on scientific papers before bed.
You'd be able to tell he is not in a good mood whenever his sleep schedule wanes due to being reminded of everything that happened. He'd go on to fiddle with machinery instead of sleeping.
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ratsoh-writes · 3 years ago
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hii!! i was wondering if i could get matched up with one of the wonderful undertale au skeletons? this is my first time doing one of these matchups and ive only recently been in the ut fandom, so here goes!
on the outside im a little shy and keep to myself and try to listen to the other person, but truly im like meeting people! i guess you could say im a bit of a shy extrovert/ambivert lol – i love hanging out with people but people are scary sometimes @_@ im the type of person that couldn't decide if they wanted to go out to the mall or play video games inside, though i have days where i kinda just wanna lay down and relax, life can be tiring. if i had to have a SOUL color, i think it would be green for kindness!
the inside of my mind is constantly the "hey so ummm not to be annoying but could you confirm that you still like me and have not decided to randomly hate me" meme. i always get so concerned about others opinions of me, and i have my moments with my anxiety where i worry excessively over something I've said and i apologize for saying that or bothering someone or even existing >_< i need a lot of reassurance and my self esteem has passed the event horizon of a supermassive black hole plz give me cuddles
i get crazy for anything having to do with video games or technology to be honest! im not an expert, but i like fooling around with games and even soldering or coding small electronics. ive fallen out of the habit, but i want to get back into it, but genshin impact has taken up most of my current attention ^_^; sports are alright, though my body doesn't like being outside (so many allergies + eczema + asthma). most of the time i have to do indoor activities, but window shopping in the mall or Amazon, reading fanfiction (like so much oml) and video games are my usual pastimes.
pet peeves and deal breakers? not many but i do have some strong ones. i don't really want to be with someone that actively hurts others maliciously, or is inconsiderate of my needs. ive been neglected and left to fend for myself emotionally a lot, and sometimes i just need to be with someone I trust. all my life ive been asked so many questions and given so many opportunities to lead that ie don't really feel like i can do that all the time, so I'd like to be able to have someone that's willing to guide me and help me since I've never had a romantic relationship before.
the most important thing to me in life is just making it through the day or week and just being happy. my health (mental and physical) has been declining so much over the past couple months, and honestly sometimes my brain says i won't be able to make it through the next day. i just want someone who's willing to support me and help me see what's so wonderful about this life to live :3
im 5' 1", Non-Binary demigirl (they/she) and im kinda thin, and i absolutely SIMP for anyone that is tall.
btw, your writing is so good and there's so much of it! keep doing what you're doing cuz it's so awesome and undertale skeletons are so cool! (and kinda hot)
happy Valentine's Day and i hope your day is filled with love!
I’ve got just the boy for you!
I’m matching you with….
Salt!! (Lustswap papyrus)
You are really his type. Salt loves the shy nerds and can’t help but to gravitate towards them. He likes the layers he gets to peel away as you become more comfortable around him. Salt is all about the chase, and you make the perfect mouse.
Salt sucks at video games. Just throwing that out here. But he will play with you. And it will be funny as heck. If you’re playing a team game, make sure he’s not on yours.
Salt is good for someone who needs a lot of reassurance. He’s observant and picks up on body language easily. He’s also good with his words and knows what to say to help settle the nerves.
Salt LOVES cringey fanfiction purely for the laugh factor. But sometimes he gets really into the romances and will fall into the trap of living a fandom without actually knowing the show lol. If you introduce him to the fanfics first, there’s a 50/50 chance he’ll start obsessing over your favorites with you
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luulapants · 4 years ago
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Teen Wolf and Perceptions of Character Age
There is a certain discussion that I find myself having (in different variations) over and over again with other Teen Wolf fans: how the age of the actors, compared to the age of the characters, affected the way we perceive and empathize with those characters. Studios have good reasons for not using actual underage kids in their shows - work hour restrictions, school arrangements, limits on racy/sexy scenes - but using adults in a show depicting younger teenagers drastically changes how we interpret their stories.
It’s easy to brush off with some of them, to think, “Oh, well it was a 19-year-old playing a 16-year-old. Not that big a difference.” But I’m going to challenge that notion with a few examples:
Erica Reyes:
Gage Golightly was about 19 when she played 15-year-old Erica. Erica was unpopular, struggled with epilepsy and medication side-effects. She was offered the bite, given the opportunity to make the life-altering decision to become a werewolf. She had no support in making that choice, and the consequences were fatal.
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Remember how bad you felt for Erica when she and Boyd were being shot full of arrows, begging Allison to stop hurting them? Well, now imagine that scene with Gage Golightly as she actually looked at age 15-16:
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Look at that picture. That is a child. Probably a child that thinks she’s an adult (I know I fucking thought so at that age) but a child nonetheless. Imagine that face being offered the bite. Trying to kiss Derek. Having the shit beat out of her as “training.” Being tortured by Gerard. Being killed by Kali.
Isaac Lahey:
Daniel Sharman was 25 when he played Isaac, who was 15-16 in S2.
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Again, we had some really harrowing, emotionally difficult scenes with him. His father abused him. He was offered the bite. Derek beat him as part of their “training.” Chris sent him, alone, into an arms deal with the Japanese mafia. His girlfriend was murdered. Now, I couldn’t even find a picture of Daniel at 15 or 16, but here he is at 17:
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How does picturing that face change Isaac’s scenes? His whole story arc?
Scott McCall:
This is a big one for me. Tyler Posey was only 20 years old when he played 16-year-old Scott, but the difference still made a stark contrast in the audience’s expectation of him as the hero of the show. I constantly see people wondering why he didn’t make better decisions, why his priorities weren’t right or why he reacted poorly in dire circumstances.
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This is the (admittedly youthful) face that we see going through all of Scott’s S1 challenges. He gets attacked by a monster, turned into a monster himself, has his life threatened by multiple adults, is put into multiple deadly situations within the span of a few months, and is thrust into a position of leadership as the protector and savior of Beacon Hills.
Here is Tyler Posey at 15 (couldn’t find a great 16 pic):
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I’ll admit that he was one of the more youthful looking actors in the early seasons. But by season 6, where he is supposed to be 18 (still younger than S1 Posey) but Tyler Posey was 26? When Scott was leading an army and clawing his own eyes out?
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What is my point?
My point is NOT that we need to re-interpret the entire story in the context of them being children. Because, clearly, the writers didn’t treat them like real children either. And that’s part of the problem. TV shows present us with teenage characters that often look, act, and feel like adults. When it’s convenient for the plot, of course. We get glimpses of immaturity when that’s convenient, too.
Having older actors gives writers permission, in a way, to write about children in situations that we, in reality, would never want to see a child in. Who would be able to stomach watching a 16-year-old Daniel Sharman being beaten? Or 15-year-old Gage Golightly being shot full of arrows? The show suddenly goes from exciting and suspenseful to outright horrifying.
Maturity-wise, how different did 18-year-old Lydia Martin feel from 24-year-old Jordan Parrish? Not very. So when you see part of fandom freaking out that it was an inappropriate and predatory relationship and another part of fandom like “Are you joking? No, it just... wasn’t,” it’s not necessarily because that second part of fandom would actually see that sort of relationship in real life and think it’s 100% okay. It’s because Lydia Martin wasn’t portrayed as an 18-year-old physically, emotionally, or intellectually. Holland Roden was 30 years old by season 5. They just put her in a high school.
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Similarly, there are people who think Sterek is an inappropriate ship. And I agree that it would be VERY creepy for these two to date:
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But that’s not what we saw. Dylan O’Brien was 20. Tyler Hoechlin was 23.
Some people have very clear mental pictures of what teenagers look and act like. When watching shows like this, they will project age-appropriate thoughts and expectations onto those characters. Others don’t have that clear picture. When you are that age, you don’t think of yourself as being young, and if you’re not around people that age afterward, you probably won’t develop a clear sense of what a 16-year-old is or is not. For those people, they’ll take these depictions at face value: adult-like people walking around a high school. It produces two very different watching experiences.
So when one person says Derek is a horrible monster for abusing children in Season 2 and another says that he was just training his army to prepare them for the real danger... that’s what that is. It’s not that one is right and the other is wrong. The first person was watching an adult beat children. The second person was watching a 24-year-old, pretending to be 20-mumblety-something or whatever the fuck Derek was, giving tough-love training to three people who, by function of appearance and how they were written, were his age and older.
(Side note: Derek was actually playing someone his own age, but only retroactively. Originally, his character was meant to be “a few years older” than Scott and Stiles but that was retconned due to the Kate Argent plotline.)
Oh and here’s Shelley Hennig at 17 vs 27 and playing 17:
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Here are some who I couldn’t find pictures of at younger ages, but whose age gaps from their characters are significant:
Sinqua Walls was 26 when he played Boyd, about a decade too old. There’s a whole mess of complicated implications with perceptions of black boys being perceived as “looking older” in that casting.
Crystal Reed was also 26 when she played 17-year-old Allison Argent, and was 29 by the time she left the show. Allison was still 17.
Keahu Kahuanui was 25 when he played Danny, who was 15-17.
Arden Cho was 29 when she started playing 16-year-old Kira.
Colton Haynes was 23 while playing Jackson, who was 16 or 17.
It is interesting that, starting in Season 4, they began hiring actors and actresses a little bit closer to their characters’ ages. Someone else write a meta on that, plz.
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greenygreenland · 4 years ago
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Sink or Swim: Kai x Reader [kinda angsty]
-tbh i had a tiny crush on Kai growing up
-i still swoon over him when he's cool but like, lloyd has stolen my heart
-you all live in yang's temple still
-as a note, i write for female readers because uhhh yeah plz don't be mad at me ;-; (and either way, you can always change the words around in your head if it bothers you)
Summary: Kai needs help. You're there for him, catching him before he sinks.
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Kai's got Lloyd, but who's got Kai?
Ninjago was filled with a variety of perils. Some were easier to see, such as destruction of any population within the premises of Ninjago city. Other times, it was minuscule, like a speck of dust. If you looked hard enough without blinking, you could see it. But most times it was invisible.
The sun was bright today, shining past the swiftly moving clouds as you clashed under its heat. Sparks flew as your katana slammed into Cole's, who skillfully parried your blows. You readied another combo, twisting to the right and faking a slash before spinning and striking to the left.
"Cole look out!" shouted Kai. Cole wasn't fast enough, and you knew it was because he wasn't used to using a katana. His hammer lay on the platform leading inside, right by Jay's side under the sunshine.
You suddenly realised Cole would be split in half if you didn't stop. But how could you when the inertia practically sent you flying towarss him? "Cole--!"
Clang!
Kai parried the attack. He hit your blade with so much force that it was sent flying across the courtyard, thankfully, clattering harmlessly on the ground. You heaved out a harsh sigh and slapped your knees. "That was close. Sorry Cole." He chuckled, giving Kai a good slap on the shoulder.
"For once our Hot-Head wasn't distracted by his 'oh-so-perfect' looks." Cole said. "How did you do that so fast?" Kai sheathed his sword with a shrug. It was odd to see him so quiet, especially around this time in the day. His expression remained relaxed, but it was void of its usual smug smirk. "I don't know, I just improvised."
You can't help the frown settling on your lips. There was an edge to Kai's voice, as if he had just returned from an unseen battle between life and death. He looked normal, yet the way he forced out a small laugh made you cringe.
"I'm going inside, think I might shower." he abruptly announced. "Don't train too hard or you might bake in the sun!" You watched as he fiddled with the strap on his sheath, twiddling it and running it between his fingers. He caught your stare and flashed a fleeting smile your way, yet it didn't feel genuine. "Kai--"
He pretended not to hear you and rushed through the temple doors. Your frown deepened. "He looks upset." Jay rested his cheek in his hand with a snort. "I'll say. He looked like he was thinking hard about something."
"But what?" Cole inquired with a sigh. "Nothing's been happening around Ninjago, shouldn't he be happy about it? He can play video games all he wants now, or, I don't know, talk to Skylor on the phone? Morro's gone and Lloyd's fine now." Zane raised doubtful brow. He took a seat by Jay and leaned his head back against one of the supporting beams. It was an odd sight to see everyone so deeply in thought again, especially since none of you should have been deeply in thought in the first place.
"Lloyd has not fully recovered." Zane notes. "He suffers from mental trauma and is regaining his strength as we speak." Nya hummed in agreement. She set her weapon down with a thoughtful nod and leaned against a supporting beam. "I don't know about you, but he seemed kind of sad. Why don't you talk to him (Y/n)?"
"Yeah, you're his girlfriend so you guys share a special connection." piped up Jay. You cam't deny that. Your relationship with Kai was special, so he told you certain things no one else had ever known about him. Whether it be about his past, or even what he dreams for the future, you knew it all.
Well except this.
You stood up, ignoring the low cracks from your aching body. "I'll be back." You pulled open the temple's doors, gently shutting it behind you as you surveyed the vast room. The main hall was empty, save for Sensei Wu who sat at a table drinking tea. He turned to you, eyeing your troubled expression knowingly. "Kai is in his room." he simply stated. You smiled at him gratefully. "Thank you Sensei."
You sprinted up the stairs, caring not if you skipped the creaky steps or walked right over them. It was quite tranquil in the halls of the quiet temple, yet somehow, it made you uncomfortable. "Kai?" You stopped in front of his door. "Kai--"
Sniffling. That was the first thing that caught your ears. Your fingers paused on the door handle, slipping past the cool metal as you continued to listen to the sounds. You knew what crying sounded like, but this? It was earth-shattering. The way he cried sounded exactly like raw agony. It was painful to listen to, yet you couldn't bring yourself to walk away.
If Kai was suffering, you had to be there for him like all the times he had been there for you, or Lloyd, or Nya and Jay and Zane and Cole.
Your fingers wrapped around the door handle. You gently knocked and peeked inside. He sat on his bed with his back facing you. His katana lay on the floor instead of of by his bed or next to his pillow like he usially did.
"Kai?" Your voice came out as a gentle whisper. "Are you okay?" His crying ceased so quickly that if you hadn't been standing outside listening, you would have thought everythimg were your imagination.
"Yeah." he steadily said. "I'm okay. I just needed to take a break after that spar. It got really intense." He laughed. It wasn't a happy one. If you knew what it felt like to have your organs ripped out, you'd describe it as listening to Kai fake his laugh and fake his happiness. He put on a brave face for the world, and perhaps that was because he knew people relied on him to step up when Lloyd couldn't.
You opened the door a little wider and let yourself in, softly closing it behind. "If something's wrong Kai, you can tell me." He sniffled quietly. "No, I'm fine." He laughed; you didn't miss the quiver in his voice. "I'm just a little tired."
"No, it's something else. I won't judge you, promise."
Kai sniffled and grabbed a tissue from his nightstand. He blew his nose with a shaky breath and tossed the tissue in the bin. For a good minute, he sat there in silence, slowing inhaling and exhaling rattling breaths. You made your way over to him and took a seat at the edge of his bed. He kept his back towards you as he sniffled some more, so you sat there, watching his shoulders quiver.
Slowly, Kai entertwined his hand with yours. He gave it a good squeeze, as if reassuring himself you were still there. You didn't want to say anything to him yet. If you did, you were sure it would break his already fragile tranquility. Thankfully, he made the first move.
"I know you wouldn't leave me," he began, "but sometimes I can't help worrying. What if we go on a mission and none of us make it back? Lloyd almost died, Cole's a ghost.... What if something happens to you? Or--or Nya and Jay or Zane?" He let out a rattling breath that spoke of all the battles you both endured. It was hard to believe you both survived every single one of them.
"Kai, we've lived this long." you said. "Why not longer? And even if one of us does die, life will go on. It always does in Ninjago, and it blooms again into something new." You squeezed his hand. "You're thinking about your parents too."
The quiet Kai stayed in was enough of an answer.
"I understand it hurts. You know, my parents died when I was very little. I don't remember how they looked like, but I remember what I felt. They made me so happy. It was short, but I found it again in you and the others. Even if something disappears, it's never truly lost." You smiled even though Kai would never see it. "Lloyd's still here because you saved him. None of us are going anywhere for as long as we can help it."
Kai's shoulders slumped. A sigh left his lips and he finally turned to face you. What strikes you the most about him isn't the puffiness under his eyes, or the bags and crinkle in his brow--it's the life that's been sucked out of his expression. His eyes were hollow, as if someone had completely wiped the emotion of happiness from existence. The deep frown tugging at his lips is even worse. It's thin, tight, and quivering.
"I-I'm sorry..."
You placed a hand on his cheek. "Kai." It's all you can muster, a name, a look of sorrow, and worry. Howw had you not seen this? How had you missed something so plainly put?
You gently pulled him closer, wrapping your arms around his warm body as the rain fell from his eyes. "You have nothing to be sorry for. If anyone should be sorry, it's me. I should be there for you, but I didn't notice. I love you though and I'm here now." you gently whispered.
"You're not alone Kai. You don't have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. We're all here for you and no one is leaving." His cries started out soft, but with each word that left your mouth, his whimpers grew, gaining and gaining in volume until a heart-wrenching sob ripped through his throat.
Tears gathered in your eyea and you allowed yourself to cry with him. It hurt to think about losing anyone, it hurt to see your boyfriend so battered, so beaten and defeated. What cure could you offer to remedy his pain you shared?
There was no answer to that. And so you sat there, keeping your arms tight around each other as if either of you would disappear. Right now, it was sink or swim. You had to fight the ache and push forward, even if it felt like you were both drowning.
Please don't forget to reblog so this can reach more people! Thank you all for reading!
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katsukis-sad-angel · 4 years ago
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yes plz
omg can i plz get a scenario where some villains capture and torture (y/n) and then boom boom boi rescues them, but they still have nightmares about it so boom boom boi comforts them and cuddles them and tells him that he’ll protect them. sooooo swoony UwU
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Absoultely!!! Thank you so much for the cute prompt, I actually had some fun with this despite the actual prompt lol. I hope it’s what you were looking for!!
warnings: heavy angst, heavy fluff, soft baku for the soul, mentions of blood, gore, abuse, vomit, panic attacks, character death, bakugou and the reader are married, my trash writing
word count: 1K
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Seven months.
Seven months since your release from the year-long nightmare that continued to haunt you even as your husband held you firmly against his chest in your queen-sized bed.
It was hot. He was hot. There was just too much heat all over you, the weighted blanket, Katsuki’s muscled arms crossed over your heaving stomach, his chest pressed against your back for support, and the summer night outside… you felt like you were being suffocated in the measures taken to help you.
Katsuki immediately noticed your change in breathing and allowed you to squirm away from him and sit up before emptying the contents of your stomach into a preplaced bowl on the floor next to the bed.
He scrambled to sit up and grab your waist so you wouldn’t fall off the mattress in your lightheaded state. When you were finished, you started crying, the burning ache in your throat becoming almost too much to bear.
Gentle hands wiped your mouth and coarse thumbs wiped away your tears. He wanted to avoid a panic attack at all costs so he took you with him to get you a glass of water.
It must’ve been quite a spectacle, once a high-ranking pro-hero reduced to carrying his sobbing, mentally scarred wife into the kitchen of their apartment to get her a glass of water to soothe her protesting stomach and burning throat.
But if you could see his face, there was nothing but concern and determination in his now gentle vermillion irises. 
The images and words that flashed through your head weren’t helping either; a deeply scarred male pressing flaming palms to your skin, searing the flesh until it sizzled, no remorse, no hesitation, only ringing laughter while you screamed and pleaded for mercy. A small blond girl, nearly a child, dragging her knife along your naked body as she questioned you. But every time you refused to give her an answer, her wrist would flick and a cut would form on your thigh or your arm or your cheek and she would shriek with laughter at your cries. Being beaten with anything available until your bruised skin gave way and blood seeped out and puddled on the floor, dragging your body through pools of your own blood and vomit as you tried to get away from your next undeserved punishment, watching someone else use brute strength to break your fingers-
You tried to listen to Katsuki’s soft, encouraging words, you valiantly attempted to sip the water you were given, but the air pushing in around you was cold now and your tender scars weren’t having it.
“Come on babycakes, I know you can hear me,” Came his gruff, sleepy murmur, “Look at me, focus those pretty eyes on me honey, it’s just you and me.”
The heart beating rapidly in your ears, the bitter cold sinking hits claws into every pore on your body, the crushing thoughts of your woes… everything simply paused when you locked eyes with him.
Soon the warmth of his fingertips lifting your chin defeated the tyranny of the chill keeping you locked in place and a comfortable heat spread down to your toes. The cool water that seemed lodged in your esophagus, went down easily and you let him help you with another sip.
“Nightmare again?” He asked, pulling you into his lap, “What did the therapist tell you to do when that happens?”
His words weren’t hurtful or condescending in any way, he just wanted you to be able to know what to do while he was away. What if you had a panic attack while he was in the shower? What if he was at the store and your nap had taken a turn for the worst?
You wilted, guilt stabbing your heart as you noticed the bags under his eyes. “T-To look around, find all the things that are around me and compare them to the bad place. Then I’ll know I’m safe unless I’m not.” 
Your hoarse whisper and correct answer earned you a nod and a smile, “I know you don’t think about it, especially when you’re in the middle of an attack, but we need to work on them ok? That was the fastest time it’s taken you to listen to my voice and calm down though, I’m very proud of you.”
He squeezed your hands reassuringly, “You’re getting better babygirl, it’ll all be over soon,” He promised, “I’m so happy you’re here with me, I must’ve cried every day you were gone until I finally had you in my arms again. I love you so goddamn much, you don’t even know.”
“You’ve stayed with me, you gave up your dream for me, you haven’t given up on me and refuse to let me give up on myself… I never expected you to stay behind with me while your friends move up the ranks, I expected you to leave like anyone else with goals would. But you didn’t. And you’re here…” You said in a raspy murmur, arms locked around his neck.
“Sssh, don’t strain yourself bunny. Remember what the therapist said, breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth.” He responds, “Do three for me ok? Crying dehydrates you, you gotta stop.”
“I… I just love you so much.”
You miss the uncontrollable smile that pokes his mouth because he had your head resting over his shoulder, but you felt him squeeze you a little tighter, the simple action bringing a watery smile to your own features.
You spent the next half hour going through your breathing exercises, some physical therapy for your damaged muscles (also to help you sleep), and you watched a detective show in his lap on the couch while he braided your hair.
When it was over, your husband carried you back to bed and tucked you into his chest under a few sheets and settled down, thumb brushing your freshly washed cheek affectionately.
“Feeling ok?” He whispers and you nod, reaching up to twist your fingers into his hair and pull him down for a tentative kiss.
You giggle when he pulls away, cheeks tinted pink.
It had been so long since you shared an actual kiss.
“So cute,” He murmured, “I could never replace you, not for all the money Deku got when that All Might bastard died. You’re worth more to me than oxygen itself, got it?”
You nod and pull his pretty face down for another kiss.
Slowly but surely, you knew, but someday everything would be ok again.
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kenganparadise · 4 years ago
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Hey, Chief! I really suprised for founding someone who writes about Baki the Grappler. Me n my friends enjoy your writes and sincerely hope that you're continue! Can you plz write headcannons(and nswf if u want) about not so popular characters like Gaia, Yanagi or Sibukava. We will be so happy if you'll hear us)
Thank you for requesting some more unpopular characters!!! I loved writing these!! Thank you and your friends for your support!!
Gaia, Yanagi or Sibukawa SFE/NSFW HCs-
Gaia-
• Very sweet boy. He’s always so kind and respectful to his S/O. He treats them as his equal unlike some of the other baki characters (coughYujirocough)
• he’s very traditional. He brings his S/O flowers as often as he can and really just enjoys the smile on his S/O’s face when they receive them.
• He’s such a gentleman as well, always asks his S/O permission to kiss or touch them. he’s always good to the one he loves, whether he is Gaia or Nomura.
• he’s an expert in reading emotions and body language. So he can read what his S/O likes and Doesn’t like, whether they know it or not. he makes a mental list of things his beloved enjoys.
• loves the idea of going on trips with his S/O. due to his lifestyle he’d try not to take his S/O to dangerous places. But he’s want to show his partner all of his favorite locations. He wants to show his S/O all the things that make him happy.
• physical affection is his love language! You’ll always catch him making physical contact with his S/O. Whether it be holding hands, his arm around their shoulders, or even just sitting close to them. Gaia loves to have physical contact with his S/O.
• in the beginning, he’s kinda shy when it comes to kissing. He’ll lightly peck his S/O on the lips then turn away with red cheeks. But over time he becomes more confident.
Yanagi-
• he’s a confident man with lots of experience. He makes a fine lover. He’s got a soft spot for romancing his partner, though he’ll never admit it.
• He prefers a partner that’s closer to him in age and maturity. He hates people who are naive and childish. Also he prefers serious long term relationships over short meaningless flings.
• his love language is acts for service. He’ll silently clean his S/O’s home, do their laundry, or put their favorite take out in the fridge. He’ll do this silently however, his S/O might not even realize he did all these things for them.
• is a very good kisser. He could take his S/O breath away (lol) he loves taking his S/O by surprise, just grabbing them and passionately kissing his S/O. Till their lips are bruised, cheeks red, and struggling to catch their breath.
• his S/O needs to have an iron stomach. Because he will kill in front of them with no remorse. He will protect his S/O from danger, but he won’t change his lifestyle for them no matter how much he cares for them.
• remembers all anniversaries and birthdays. Gives his loved ones thoughtful gifts. Yanagi much prefers handmade gifts over store bought things. He has a few items his S/O gave him that he keeps close to him. He cherishes things like this.
Shibukawa-
• Gouki is probably one of the best partners in the baki universe by far. Shibukawa does not date, he only courts. In his younger days he would have probably preferred short flings, but now he only wants long term serious relationship.
• like Yanagi, he much prefers an S/O that is closer to him in age. But he needs an S/O with a good sense of humor. He wants someone to laugh at his dumb dad jokes.
• he much perfers and S/O with a strong personality, with interesting character. He doesn’t care for looks all that much.
• he loves calm domestic life. Though he’s always getting into fights, he loves coming home to his partner and letting them patch up his wounds.
• he quite enjoys getting into battles in front of his S/O. He adores showing off and proving to his partner that he’s still powerful even in his old age.
• he would prefer his partner to be taller than him. He loves hugging them and being able to bury his face in their chest. he would particularly enjoy it if his S/O had to lean down to kiss him.
• even though he’s quite dominant, he loves being the little spoon. He wants to be wrapped up in his partner’s warm embrace.
• loves kissing his S/O and is very good at it! He’d grab his S/O by their shirt and pull them into a rough kiss. He loves to pull his S/O in by their shirt collar or belt loop.
• he would really like it if his S/O wore traditional Japanese clothing. He would want his S/O to match his Style. It doesn’t matter if his S/O is Japanese or not.
• his favorite dates are picnics or walks around the park. He loves being in nature with his Beloved. He’d kiss their hands and tell them how beautiful and loved they are. He always searches for the fullest, most beautiful flower to put in his S/O’s hair. He loves those sappy moments like that.
🔞WARNING NSFW AHEAD🔞
Gaia-
• he’s got a super low Sex drive. Like a suuuuuper low sex drive. You’d think being a soldier and living with men all the time he’d be super pent up but no.
• When Gaia gets a little hot under the belt he will approach his S/O. He’d come up, hugging his S/O from behind. He’d nestle his hips into their. Slowly he’d run his S/O’s body. They’d pretty quickly get the memo. They take his hand a lead him to the bedroom.
• he kinda gets shy. Gaia doesn’t have that much experience actually.
• he’s quite slow during the act. If he’s on top his thrusts are slow but deep. He’d hold his S/O’s hand for sure.
• when he gets close to cumming his thrusts are so much quicker. He gets drunk on the sound of his hips slamming into his S/O. He loves that clapping noise.
• he prefers his S/O to be on top. His favorite position is the the lotus, to he can look into his S/O’s eyes and hug them.
• he always makes his S/O cum before he does. He hugs his S/O super tight when he cums. He whimpers when he orgasms.
• always stays up and cuddles with his S/O afterwards. Falls asleep after they do. 
Yanagi-
• Yanagi has a pretty average sex drive. He can actually be little selfish in the bedroom. He’s go sooo much experience. He knows exactly what he’s doing.
• I can see him being really into BDSM. Yanagi is really into Shibari. It’s an art form for him. He’d like an S/O he can practice on. He really likes tying his partner up.
• will never ever ever ever bottom. Nope. It’s never gonna happen.
• he likes using toys in the bedroom. He’d totally tie a vibrator to his S/O and just leave them for a while. He’s probably got a little collection of toys.
• probably has his S/O wear a vibrator in public. He’d have a little remote in his pocket and he’d control everything. He’s probably gotten his S/O into a couple embarrassing situation.
• likes being on top of his S/O. Even when not using toys he will absolutely be on top. He enjoys using his Strength with his S/O. He doesn’t need to tie them up to pin them down.
• he prefers clothed sex for sure. He thinks it’s so much hotter. He prefers to be fully clothed while his S/O is stark naked.
• Will 100% practice safe sex. He will always take extra precautions whether his S/O is male, female, or other. He will absolutely use extra protection if his S/O is AFAB. He’s not trying to become a dad.
• Would help his S/O clean up after sex then he’d probably fall right asleep.
Shibukawa-
• He’s a pervy old man.
• sex is never a serious matter. He wants his S/O to laugh and enjoy themselves. He’s probably crack a joke or tickle them to get his partner to giggle.
• I stated before he wants an S/O who is closer to his age. Well He finds himself attracted to people with longer hair, he likes running his fingers through their hair. He’d find it even more beautiful if they had touches silver (if they’re closer to him in age of course)
• he thinks is gorgeous when he’s on top and their hair is scattered below them. He would love to turn into a painting. He runs his fingers though it and tugs on it lightly.
• this man probably has a collection of really old pin up magazines form back in the day. It probably hidden somewhere in his house.
• he likes his S/O on top most of the time. He likes it when his S/O rides him especially.
• he likes burning incense and massage oils. He’ll join his S/O in their shared futon and make love all night.
• quite enjoys tender lovemaking in the morning. He’d roll over and kiss his S/O awake. He’d have a wide smile as their eyes flutter open. Then they’d make sweet love until it’s time to get up for the day.
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