#someone goes 'hey lol you should do this thing' and by god we'll make it happen in some form if it is at all conceivably possible

[inseparabiles]

#highkey envy everybody in the tags#who gets asks like 'please write piss kink yesterday'#where the fuck are you getting your freaks from#high society life has made me so prim and proper#got my pinky up when I drink my fucking tea

would you like write smut like that? is that why you haven't because you don't get asks like that and you would if you did? asking for a friend

It's genuinely. Like don't get me wrong we do like writing our genfic, we do love our all of that that we're doing anyway and people seem to like reading, but it's like

I guess it's been oddly branding? And I don't know if it's that people now take that brand as a "well you wouldn't do this thing and asking it of you would be weird and I'm going to respect your implicit boundaries by not doing it" or if it's more like "we, the audience that you have, want this specific thing that you're already writing and when you part from it it's HIGHKEY WEIRD and OFFPUTTING" or a mix of both but

would we like to get the kind of unhinged requests that we're seeing all over the tags? Get slapped in the face with an ask that's just so out there? Write explicit for the sake of explicit without having to find a better excuse for it? Yes. God. Yes. We would.

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for trying to eat a golden cow me and my crew found on an island after I attacked my captain for sacrificing 6 of our men?

Okay, so—I'm an adult man. I've been away at sea for a long while, twenty years in fact. The reason I left so many years ago was because I was sent off to fight the Trojans in a war. It was tense, and anxiety inducing as shit—but somehow we won because our captain managed to get us through it all. My captain (who I'll just call O for this story) is someone I've known for a long time. He's the brother of my wife, and we've been close for a very long time now. But, like.. okay, hold on, let me just keep explaining.

So, after we win the war—and after he apparently drops a baby off a tower because the mighty sky God Zeus told him to, we head out at sea. But I find out we have no food supplies. So I go to tell him we ran out. His response—'Oh, no worries! Let's just watch where the birds fly and see where they go so we can find somewhere to hunt food'. I think—'Okay, okay, kinda reasonable'. We find an island, and one of our scouts (who I'll call P) says he sees an island in the distance. But we see this weird glowing shit that we think is fire? So I decide to suggest we raid the place just to make sure there's no time to waste. But O refuses, and decides to straight up head into the island with P alone so they can find food themselves and so no one ends up dead. I'm thinking we don't actually know what's gonna happen, but.. hey! Hey, he's the captain here, right? Better to trust him. So he goes in. He comes back. Apparently these weird ass fucking alien things told them there was a cave to find food, so we search for it. We find it. We head inside. There's a bunch of fucking sheep everywhere, but hey! Free food, right? So we kill one. Then this MOTHERFUCKING CYCLOPS comes out. Not even kidding! Not even kidding—it comes out, and is like 'You killed my sheep.. it was my favorite.. blah blah blah'—and proceeds to LITERALLY ALMOST KILL MY CAPTAIN!! IM THINKING—HEY! MY CAPTAIN WILL GET US OUT OF THIS! AND HE TRIES! HE OFFERS THIS THING WINE THAT IT TAKES FOR SOME REASON, TELLS IT HIS NAME IS 'NOBODY', AND IM THINKING—MAYBE WE'LL GET OUT OF THIS! HA! NO! NO, IT PROCEEDS TO MURDER SEVERAL OF OUR MEN WITH OUR CLUB. SO WE'RE FREAKING THE FUCK OUT! BUT WE ATTACK ANYWAY. LONG STORY SHORT, P FUCKING GETS CRUSHED AND DIES. WE ESCAPE. BUT HEY, WE NEED FOOD EVEN THOUGH ALL OUR FRIENDS ARE DEAD, SO WE GO BACK IN AND BLIND THE THING! IT STARTS LIKE CRYING FOR SOME REASON?? AND THEN WE HEAR THESE OTHER DISTORTED VOICES WHO TURN OUT TO BE OTHER CYCLOPSES! WHO ARE THE LITERAL SIBLINGS OF THE CYCLOPS WE FOUGHT. I'M PANICKING AND THINKING WE SHOULD RUN, BUT NOOOOO.. turns out the Nobody thing ended up working though because the other Cyclops bitches left. So we go to get the sheep and leave. But then the captain turns right back around for some reason, and starts LITERALLY YELLING AT THE THING!! HE EVEN SAYS HIS NAME, THE NAME OF HIS KINGDOM, AND BASICALLY ENDANGERS EVERYONE JUST CUZ HE WAS BEING LIKE 'HEY BITCH LOL GET FUCKED YOU GOT SPARED BY A KING'. BUT I DONT SAY ANYTHING CUZ I GOTTA BE LOYAL, RIGHT??

I.. I don't even think I can say everything he did here to be honest. This man did so much shit! He willingly goes up to this weird ass island in the sky and gets help from a wind god who keeps whispering to all of us to open the bag—and I try to resist, but I can't cuz of the weird ass god magic shit, so I open the bag! We get blown all the way back to the 'Land of the Giants'. TURNS OUT THE MOTHERFUCKING GOD OF THE SEA HIMSELF IS THE CYCLOPSES DAD! HE KILLS HUNDREDS OF OUR MEN. BUT WR STILL HAVE THE WIND BAG SO O OPENS IT AND WE LAND AT THIS ISLAND THAT BELONGS TO A SORCERESS WHO TURNED OUR MEN INTO PIGS!! O GOES TO SAVE THEM EVEN THOUGH I'M LIKE 'Dude you're gonna fucking die you don't even know what she can do' AND SOMEHOW SUCCEEDS!! WE GO TO THE UNDERWORLD. I SEE P AND O'S MOM IN THERE. IM TRAUMATIZED. AND AFTER WE SEE THIS WEIRD ASS DRUG DEALER LOOKING PROPHET GUY, O SUDDENLY HAS A ANIME VILLAIN ARC MOMENT AND SHOUTS ABOUT HOW HES GONNA BE A MONSTER NOW. WE SAIL OUT. WE FIND SIRENS, SO WE KILL 'EM! BUT HE ORDERS WE 'CUT OFF THEIR TAILS AND LET THEM DROWN'!! CUZ THATS TOTALLY A SANE THING TO DO!! AND THEN WE SAIL THROUGH THE LAIR OF SCYLLA. I ADMIT I OPENED THE BAG CUZ I FELT KINDA BAD TO BE HONEST. O IS LIKE 'Ay man it's cool just take this torch real quick', SO I DO! SIX OF OUR MEN, ALL OF WHICH WERE HOLDING TORCHES (I THREW ONE DOWN WHEN I REALIZED WHAT WAS HAPPENING), PROCEED TO LITERALLY DIE. SO WHEN WE LEAVE AND I REALIZE HE JUST KILLED OUR MEN, I'M LIKE 'HEY MAN WHAT THE HELL???'. HES LIKE 'NAH BITCH I CANT SAY ANYTHING', SO I'M LIKE 'DUDE FUCK YOU' AND I START FIGHTING HIM! ONE OF OUR CREW MEMBERS STABS HIM AS HE LITERALLY THROWS ME TO THE GROUND. AND AFTER HES OUT, I HAVE TO CONVINCE EVERYONE NOT TO KILL HIM. WE FIND AN ISLAND WITH COWS. WE GET THERE AND TIE HIM UP. THEN WHEN O WAKES UP AS IM ABOUT TO KILL A COW, HE HAS THE AUDACITY TO BEG ME NOT TO KILL IT EVEN THOUGH WE HAVENT HAD FOOD IN SEVERAL WEEKS! I'M DESPERATE AT THIS POINT, RIGHT? SO I DONT LISTEN AND STAB IT. HE STARTS YELLING AT ME AFTER, SAYING WE'RE ALL DOOMED. WE RUN BACK TO THE SHIFT AS THE SKY GOES CRAZY WITH THUNDER. ZEUS SHOWS UP! I GET BLASTED CUZ O CHOOSES US TO DIE INSTEAD OF HIMSELF. AND NOW IM STUCK IN THE UNDERWORLD WRITING THIS..

God.. I feel like I'm talking to a therapist. Point is—am I the asshole?

[golbrocklovely]

i cannot stand incompetent ppl/doing extra work bc someone didn't think ahead

(rant about work below lol)

so last week, on wednesday, i had to change the apparel section around bc we are having a refresh, so to speak. basically we are putting out all new fall-esque items, even tho it's literally 90 degrees out everyday. so i spent basically my ENTIRE shift working on my section by myself. even stayed an extra hour to really finish up. i only spent one hour not doing that, and that was bc we got a truck in and i had to break that down with my coworkers. but the rest of the time, i was spent moving things around, hanging up so many clothes, the whole nine.

no one helped me. even tho i had a manager that was basically just walking around and doing other smaller sections. in a way i was glad to be left alone bc it makes it easier for me to lay everything out and really make sure it looks good. plus, i had this planogram to follow, so really i just needed help hanging things up. but i did fine on my own.

i come in today, the ENTIRE section has been moved around and changed. only two walls didn't get changed, but even then yes they did because shelves were removed, for some reason.

so immediately i think "oh god my manager S did this" bc she has a tendency to try and space things out and change shit around even if the both of us work on things, get it set, and make it look good. or if i've worked on it myself in the past, she will come over on a day i'm not in and change it around. and look, she's the merch manager. i get it's her job to change it. but genuinely imo it never looks better when she does that. not only that, but we are literally following pictures. if it's not set right, it's corporate's fault.

but all i could think in my head is "why the fuck did she change everything??" everything was set! i followed the photos to a T. hell, we actually got all the product in, which is a first bc the amount of times we will have a set change only to not get half the product is almost always. so i was confused. in the layout corporate gives us, they don't account for two walls in that section, so those always end up being random shit. we're allowed to move things around, be flexible. but i mean every. single. wall. was changed.

i'm now pissed bc why the fuck did i do all of that if it wasn't necessary?? all that work i spent was not important then.

S ends up coming up to me and saying "hey did you ever get the pics for the set change?" and i just look at her very confused. bc…… yeah? now granted, she wasn't the one that gave me the set to do, it was instead J, my gm. so okay, i can believe she doesn't know i already did it minus the fact that the entire section is different.

i tell her i did it on wednesday. S goes to give me planogram for the set, but tells me that they haven't dropped yet in the system (J also had told me this but ended up giving me pics of the set design anyway.) basically the set isn't technically due for another week or two, but since we got everything in, it made sense to put it out now.

S tells me we'll worry about the set later bc, and i quote, "J did it last week, so it should be fine".

…………….huh?

what do you mean J did it last week? I DID IT LAST WEEK, AND J IS THE ONE THAT FUCKED THE WHOLE THING UP.

look, i've known for a while now that i need to leave my job. i need a better paying one, even if it's retail, bc this place has used up every last bit of nerve i have left in me. but this might be the final thing that does me in, genuinely. bc one, taking credit for something I did pisses me off to no end. and two, J did not do the set, bc she moved everything around in the worst way. so i'm telling yall now, and my managers tomorrow, that if i get told "hey so J did the set wrong and we need you to put it back correctly" i'm telling them no. i did it correctly the first time, this is now J's, or S's, or any other managers', problem to deal with. i'll hang up clothes if you want, bc i can do that off the floor and in the back away from customers. but PHYSICALLY moving anything around for a set planogram that i already did a whole week ago… not gonna happen.

to top all of this off today, i had to break down the truck. we get five pallets in, over 200 boxes of shit to sort thru and separate. i have two other coworkers that help with the truck. they are nice, but you have to basically tell them four times where things are supposed to go on the uboats and it just gets exhausting, especially when i'm already fucking annoyed. two of the uboats were already filled with product, and all we had were three empty ones. ended up having to leave things on the pallets and just fill the uboats with certain things and not others.

the one almost filled uboat they ended up putting product on even tho i told them not to... whatever. not my problem. it was all for the same section anyway.

S, my manager, has basically stopped helping us with the truck. she goes and finds other shit to do now, and particularly today she chose to start taking stuff from the back for one of our sections and forcing more product out bc we are having inventory soon. of all the days to do this "purging", idk why she chose now to do it instead of any day of the week we don't get a truck. not only that, but the merch manager not helping out BREAKING DOWN THE MERCH makes no fucking sense to me, but i digress.

we get one set pallet this time around that is filled with style and toys. the rest of the pallets are filled with other shit. one uboat is set aside for toys. a girl that usually works on candy comes into the backroom and says "hey, S wants me to work on toys". i tell her "okay, well we haven't gotten to toys yet so you'll have to wait." she nods and walks away and goes into this back common room area. not even a full two minutes goes by and she comes back out and starts talking to my coworkers, and she then repeats "S really wants me to work on toys now".

……did we not just have this conversation like a whole fucking minute ago??? did you think i was able to break down a pallet that fucking fast???

at this point, i was snippy and every single person on this planet was getting on my last nerve and i just said "well she's gonna have to wait for you to do it, idk what to tell you", she being S. my coworkers laughed, but since i had music playing, i couldn't tell if they were laughing bc of how i said it or if it was bc i was complaining about S.

then this coworker asks if i need any help, i say no. she rolls her eyes at me and laughs, and then she moves on to asking my other coworkers. and they all work on A SINGLE PALLET together. three of them worked on one pallet. while i had already gone thru two and ENDED UP DOING MORE than them. three of them did two pallets, altogether. i did three pallets by myself. when, crazy concept, it would have been better if they all did a pallet a piece.

i really got to start remembering i only get paid a very small amount, and to stop working above that small amount. bc at this point i'm just being abused at my job lol

[jelliezellie]

hey :) I just finished your Tendou x Reader oneshots- theres so many chapters lol

anyways tendou is my comfort character. can you write some comfort? I haven't been feeling useful lately. And all of my hard work goes unnoticed... idk but I'd love it if you made a tendou comfort :)))

-🍙

omg 🍙, i'd love to!!! thank you so much for the request.

Remember that, as people, we don't need uses. We're not objects and should never be treated as such. You're not a robot. You're a person with human feelings. Anyway, enjoy the comfort! :)

Tendou's Tissues for Your Issues

You dragged your finger across your keyboard, truly feeling each and every key. Every bump, every notch. After a while, you began to feel the letters, too. That was when a tear slipped out. "Damn it," You whispered, staring at the blank page of work you were supposed to be doing. You wanted to complete it; you truly did. But you were so tired. No, tired wasn't even the word for it anymore. You were burnt out from all of your hard work, all of your efforts going unnoticed. Your boss, your teachers, hell, even your friends didn't notice how hard you were trying. How you were hanging on for dear life.

A pair of arms wrapped around you. "What?" You nearly jolted out of your seat. You were so focused on the paper that you didn't notice Tendou walking in.

"Are you okay?" He asked, kissing your forehead.

"I'm so tired, 'toru."

"Ah, trouble in paradise? Is there anything I can do?"

You leaned into his arms. "Just hold me for a while, please?"

He nodded and examined the paper you were stuck on. "Science?"

"The worst form of it - chemistry."

"I knew someone who was into chemistry. I doubt he'd talk to me now."

"Someone who bullied you?" You questioned. You were always protective of Tendou, and he was protective of you. You both looked out for each other because you knew that nobody else would.

"Nah," He mumbled, "But enough of that. You need a break."

"I have to finish this. It's due tomorrow."

"Nooooo~" He sang, pulling you out of your chair. "Let's go to the kitchen! C'mon, I made chocolate. It's a new recipe."

You followed him sleepily into the kitchen, where he picked up a spoon and dipped it in the chocolate sauce, then put it in your mouth. "Even I haven't tried it yet. You're my guinea pig here, so tell me how it-"

"OH GOD!" You spat the chocolate out. "Did you use salt instead of sugar or something?!"

"No-?"

"Then why did it taste like the ocean just threw up in my mouth?!"

"uhh- oh." His eyes landed on the salt and sugar. "Yknow, maybe I made a mistake."

"You think?" You asked, laughing.

He sighed and began getting rid of it all in the sink. "I sure am an idiot, huh?"

"Maybe you need to call your chemistry friend."

He laughed and pulled you close. "Wanna make some cookies instead?"

"Sure. But only my favorite!"

"You think I'd make anything else?" He reached in the fridge and pulled out the pre-made cookie batter. "Let's get started. And forget about your homework, we'll work through it together later."

You smiled at each other and he flicked some of the remaining chocolate on your face.

"EW!" You shouted, wiping the disgusting thing off of you. You threw some at him and he got some in his mouth. "Oh god, that's terrible!"

"That's what I said!"

[tardytothepardy]

Fruits Basket - Vol. 20

I want to try to break the book into three main chunks. The last time I did that, it was easier to write about. So uh, the first chunk has to do with Tohru and her feelings about Kyo, and Kagura's reaction, the second chunk is Akito and Ren's past being revealed (it's totally a mess but it's to be expected), and the third chunk is about things unraveling.

Ok cool let's do it. (The picture was at the end of one of the chapters, I just liked it a lot idk) (also tumblr needs to increase the character limit for the alt text, it's only 200 characters, which goes by quick. twitter has like,, 420, which is more manageable)

Tohru came to Kazuma's house to visit Izusu, and Kagura came to confront Tohru about something. What possibly could it be (as if I didn't say so in the beginning)? Kagura was talking about it a bit with Kazuma, and he said he just hopes that Tohru's feelings don't come from a place of pity (which is a mild "oof" point for Kagura, because that's mostly why she loved Kyo), because Kyo has had to deal with people either flat out hating him, or being nice to him out of a sense of pity. Even Kazuma admitted (earlier in the series. I don't remember when but I remember reading it) that part of the reason he took in Kyo as a child was because he was making it up for how he treated his grandfather, the previous Cat. Over time, those feelings fell away, in favor of genuinely caring for Kyo's wellbeing, but Kazuma doesn't seem to be the one who would forget about stuff like that. (Also it turns out that the previous Cat's partner basically stayed with him out of a sense of pity, as well)

It turns out that Izusu and Tohru were talking about the same thing, and Tohru worried if her feelings for Kyo were selfish, because she wanted nothing to take Kyo away from her, not the curse, not the Sohma family, nothing. Kagura then bust into the room, smacked Tohru across the fucking room it seems, and said, "Then fucking tell him that!!" (direct quote, 100%) Izusu yelled at Kagura for hitting Tohru, asking what right she had for doing that, but given Kagura's nature, it doesn't seem completely out of nowhere. She just got pretty emotional in that moment.

For Tohru, it seemed to knock the right screw loose for her, and she thought back to when she was talking about her father to Kyo, and if he said really anything against what she was talking about, she apparently would've just zipped her lips and pretended she hadn't said anything, and moved on, but he didn't. Which is pretty nice of him to do, honestly. Anyway, when she came to again (because she got knocked out from Kagura's emotion-packed slap), Kyo was sitting there, because Kazuma had called him, ("Hey dude so there was a smackdown here and Tohru got knocked out lmao" is how I'm imagining the call. kjdhkfgjh can you imagine Kazuma saying "lmao" I can't) but Kyo didn't ask about the fight (which was a Wise Lesson from Shishou™), another nice thing for him to do, though in my opinion it would be a pretty easy thing to explain.

Ok, so now onto the second chunk, which kinda has some of the stuff in the third chunk later on but whatever. Story flow, it's pristine today.

It starts with some of the,, maids? or something that are in the Sohma house (they never get names so far as I can tell, and I don't really know what to call them, but at one point someone referred to one of them as a maid, I think? Idk.) talking about Ren, and wondering why Akito still let Ren wander around freely like she does. Another said that Akito can only do so much, because apparently there is a crowd of people in the house that are "Ren-followers", and if she had Ren be completely contained within an area, there's a chance that those followers might start some shit, which would be a headache to deal with. One of the maids said that Akito has been sick (or holed up in her room) for too long, and the rest of the Juunishi are doing nothing to help, which does not help with Ren, who spouts out stuff about how the Juunishi doesn't really care about Akito at all. The maids seem to have a particular thing against Ren, because they view her as an unsuitable woman who somehow managed to become partners with Akira, the previous God, I think, but also the father of Akito.

Speaking of Akito, she has a box. That same box that Ren tried to use Izusu to get back. Something about that box has to do with Akira, and it seems important to both Akito and Ren, though honestly at this point Akito is probably just holding onto it out of spite for Ren, I wouldn't be surprised (I, too, am a petty bitch. I understand the mindset). She asked Kureno if he has any idea what is in it, and when he says he doesn't, she simply says, "Father."

Now we jump over to Ren and Shigure, who are also talking about about that elusive box. Apparently Shigure was tasked to get the box, but obviously he didn't succeed. He said (thought? He didn't say it aloud, it was one of those thoughts thing--- anyway) that he didn't really care, he didn't even want to touch that box, much less even look at it, it was no loss to him. Out loud, he says that it would be inappropriate for him to hold it, and Ren agrees, saying that only she can have it, just like how only she could have Akira, when he was alive. Are you already sensing where this is heading? Well, I'll say it anyway.

Flash back to Kureno, he's thinking about Akira, from when he was younger and Akira was still alive. He remembers Akira as very beautiful, in a fleeting way. Akira was sickly, all the time, and sad. Everyone knew that he wouldn't live for very long. But since he was the head of the house, of the family, it was imperative that he find a partner and produce an heir. That person was Ren, who was one of his care-takers. The rest of the staff (or something??) didn't like that she was going to be with Akira, it seemed unsuitable, but she was the only candidate. She was the only person who recognized how lonely he was, is what Akira said as a defense when people objected. And so, they were married. The older members of the family despised it, the younger thought it was the beginning of a new change, a new era. Ren said (because this section is flipping between Kureno and Ren) that it was only them two (haha grammar): Akira and Ren, they were all who mattered. She was everything to Akira. So when she had Akito, well, that muddled things. Because now there was another person that Akira loved: his own fuckin child. That's right. Ren got jealous of her own child because Akira loved his very own daughter. That's,, that's something. Shortly after that, Ren decided that Akito would be raised as a boy. Or maybe it was while she was still pregnant. At any rate, she said it was because it would be unsuitable for the head of the family to be a woman, but we all know the real reason: it's so that Akira wouldn't be loving another girl, even though that other girl was his daughter. Jfc Ren is a handful. From Kureno's memory, it seems like even as a kid, Shigure recognized that.

Back to Shigure and Ren, Shigure says that he feels sorry for Ren, probably thanks to all that upset she has. She says the same, that the Juunishi have had to deal with the abuse that Akito has dealt to them simply because of that "bond", and that there's no way that anyone could honestly love Akito. Shigure also comments that sometimes he thinks that if Akito had been raised as a woman, she'd look exactly like Ren, which instantly pisses Ren off. She just starts screaming about "Who do you have to thank for Akito being born! I'm the reason that (insert angry comment about how she's the only reason why x happened)". I'm kinda glad she isn't in the series much, this is exhausting. I know she's in the book later, and maybe a bit more in the next few, but jeez. It's a lot.

Anyway, let's end the chapter with Momiji having his curse be broken. The end is near (for the Juunishi, not this post lmao).

The second that the curse breaks, Akito knows it (that's probably the bond. I doubt it's some kinda "we'll be friends forever uwu" kinda thing, it's just kinda an awareness of each other, or maybe just God's awareness of everyone) and races towards Momiji, begging him to not leave. Now that the curse is broken, Momiji is confused as to how those thoughts he had prior for Akito were even there, now that he sees Akito clinging onto him, whimpering and panicked. Momiji waves her away, saying that he'll keep it a secret, and that Akito should go rest, wasn't she feeling sick earlier?

We pan over to the school, where Haru is asking Yuki if he's noticed anything off about Momiji. Haru can't place it, but something seems off, maybe not. Kyo ends up running into Momiji walking down a hallway, and asks him about it (he overheard the others talking about it), and Momiji just out and says it: his curse broke. He said he imagines that Tohru would be happier about it if it were Kyo's curse that broke, and that he (Momiji) lost. (I guess he lost in some unspoken one-sided competition of "getting" Tohru, because y'know she's not her own person who is capable of deciding these things for herself or anything)

Later, Momiji goes back to the main Sohma estate, to apologize to Akito for how he acted yesterday, but also to say that he won't be staying there any longer. Akito takes it like a champ, slapping Momiji across the face and insulting him, saying that he's a traitor, he has nowhere else to go, his family either doesn't remember him or hates him, he'll never be happy! and Momiji's just like, "Yeah lol I already feel lonely", that he can't be with the person he loves, and he no longer has that One Thing that previously connected him to most of the other people he's close with, and that there's no going back. He does say though, that it's not Akito's decision or place to say whether Momiji will ever be happy or not, because he might not be happy now, that does not mean that he won't ever be happy in the future. He then asks Akito how long she will stay at the house, thinking that eventually, everyone will come back to her, that no one will be happy without her. What if it's actually her that is most afraid-- Akito isn't down for an analysis, she just tells Momiji to leave.

Let's now go down memory lane, down a nice and happy time, especially for Akito and Ren: Akira's death and it's after effects. Happy times. (apparently i was wrong, the thing i said was the third chunk that wove in nicely with the second was just the second chunk, i think this is the actual third chunk)

Akito is thinking back (on a rainy morning, extra points for setting the mood) on her relationship with her parents. With Akira, it was nice, he always was kind and caring, telling Akito that she is what everyone has been waiting for, and that she thought she was the one Akira loved the most. With Ren, however, she was always cruel, from the start. She always glared at Akito, she was always mean. Akito hates her. We're brought back to the day Akira died, where Ren bursts into the room, asking why she wasn't notified sooner, why Akira had to die alone. One of the attendants said his condition worsened too quickly to call Ren close by, but also that Akira hadn't died alone; he died with Akito by his side. The attendant said that Akira's will had been passed onto Akito, she was now the head of the family. Ren was angered at that, there's no reason for Akito to still be around now! She only tolerated her child being around because Akira liked her, but now that Akira is gone, there is no one to love or care about Akito. Akito said that wasn't true, that all of the Juunishi will love her, because of their bond. (Which is basically what Akira said. He put most of that stuff into her head, and she doubled down on it whenever Ren said anything against it, which might as well be every single time they were around each other)

Back to the present, Kureno comes in the room to talk about something, but Akito interrupts him, saying that she was happy when Yuki was born, as the Rat. It was mostly just something she used to prove Ren wrong, and she used it as long as she could (much to the deterioration of Yuki's mental health). She thought back, over the years, to all the bad things that had happened, how she tried so hard to keep everyone close, and how all of them had, one by one, come to "betray" (cough cough, try to live their own lives, cough cough) her. After Shigure and Yuki left to their present residence, Ren said that they had given up on Akito. When Akito again mentioned their bond (which, really, now that I think about it, has basically been the singular thing straining to keep everything under control. Akito's sole sense of identity was being God, she's never had anything else.), Ren waved it away, then challenged that if any of the Juunishi can go out into the world, experience it in all it's freaky magical ways, and not be taken in by it, and instead return to Akito, then she will have been proved wrong, Akito's claims this whole time will have been correct. If they failed to, however, Ren said that Akito would have to give up the Sohma name. But Akito believed it, she truly believed she was right, that nothing big enough would come between her and the rest of the Juunishi (Tohru has entered the chat). She had to believe it, she just had to. But now, it's evident, between how Haru reacted upon learning about Izusu, Momiji's demeanor after the curse broke, the general way that the rest of the Juunishi float away from Akito, that it isn't true, and with that, she has nothing to hope for.

Upon this realization, Ren bursts into the room, knee-length hair floating around her, eyes crazed, knife in hand, demanding for Akira. Demanding for that box, and whatever contents were inside. In response, Akito fuggin yeeted it at Ren, she didn't give a shit. It flashed back to right before Akira died, and he soothed Akito by saying that, despite dying, he will always be with her. He wanted for Ren to be happy. He wasn't upset that he was dying so soon, he knew that he was just a man who was going to die, but he was happy that he was able to have a child, and to have had that child with Ren, and since that child was special, it was proof that their relationship was a special one. Back to the present, Ren scrambles to the box, tears it open hungrily to find,,, nothing. The box was empty. It'd always been empty, said to have held Akira's soul, but it was mostly just something to help Akito with Akira's passing. Suddenly, Akito grabbed the knife that fell from Ren's hand, poised to stab Ren but then--

Hiro's curse broke. Ren can thank that bond she always scoffed at for saving her life. But hey, now Hiro can hold his baby sister, which is nice. Yay for family moments.

Boo for Akito, because it's just really grinding in that the curse is quickly falling apart, and there's absolutely nothing that she can do about it. Ren taunts Akito, asking if she was trying to kill her. The attendants blow up, one yelling at Ren for making such a scene, taking a knife with her, and another scolds the first for giving Akito that box in the first place, it's stupid! The first attendant said that Akito knew from the start that it was empty, common sense would say that much! (idk man it could've held one last letter from Akira to Akito, a letter wouldn't affect the weight of the box significantly, it's not common sense)

Akito leaves the room, and Kureno follows. Akito says that it was both common sense but also not, that there wasn't anything in the box. She wanted to believe there was a chance that something was in that box, some kind of invisible energy that would help her. But even after opening it, seeing that it was empty, she still held onto it, knowing there wasn't anything. And that was her common sense, that's what she thought. She'd never been given any other way of thinking, of living, so why and how should anyone expect differently? Kureno says that she can start learning now, that that was what he wanted to talk about earlier, that she can't stay here, she'll never be able to move on, to which Akito cuts him off with "Fuggin now, bitch?? You're saying that now?? That doesn't help me! It would have helped in the beginning! But not fucking now!" (which btw is true. i doubt akito was even allowed to go to a public school, that she was schooled within the estate. i really believe that she's never really been outside of the the properties that the Sohma family owns) Then she stabs Kureno, with that knife she's been holding all this time. She reasons with it saying that Kureno's "halfway kindness" has been killing her this whole time, that it can't be fixed by Kureno saying that maybe Akito should go touch some grass. As Akito is running from the scene (more like haggardly stumbling), she continues thinking that it's Kureno's fault, it's not on her, until she remembers what Yuki was saying at the New Year's gathering about blame. It doesn't really fix anything, it just momentarily makes you think that you're not in the wrong. *record scratch* What if it's Akito's fault, then? All of this? What if it's her fault? What if it's the fault of the person who made everyone change? What if it's Tohru's fault?? (dun dun dunnnn)

Meanwhile, back at the other Sohma house (Shigure's house?) Tohru has some confessing to do. Before that though, Kyo has some confessing to do, though not about the same thing. He tells Tohru that he knew her mom before she died, and that he was the reason she died. He tells her that they met when he was really young, and how they had kinda become friends (in that way that people become friends by talking often, but Kyo never told Kyoko his name, because he had some weird thing about having a name so similar). That all fell apart the day that Tohru went missing. He promised that he would find her and rescue her, but after finding that Yuki had done it (the evidence was The Hat), he lashed out, and never talked to Kyoko again. Years later, when he was at the crosswalk, who was beside him but Kyoko, who he recognized instantly. He wasn't sure what to do, whether to say something to her or hold back. He was totally able to grab her arm, get her out of harm's way, but he didn't, he was too scared. (plus yaknow the whole cat thing) He beats himself up about, still to this day. He does the same with his own mom's death. It was his fault that his mom killed herself, she couldn't stand having such a monster as a child. It was too much for her, and she couldn't take any longer. (It wasn't. I won't say that his mom wasn't put under strain for having Kyo, for knowing that he wasn't human, that he turned into a weird monster if his bracelet was taken off, but from what we've seen of his dad, it was probably at least 85-90% his dad's fault. He was too caught up in the politics of the Sohma family, ashamed of the fact that Kyo was the Cat, the worst out of them, that he couldn't even salvage having one of the good freaks to have as a child of his, and he took it all out on his wife and later his son.)

And the book ends on that cheery note. (Why do I say stuff like that why I am I like this)

[orange-waterfalls]

The Deal

Illinois x gender neutral!reader

@lawfluff-evil ty for the prompt

A/N: It got to be way too long so I split it into two parts lol. Rated T for cursing. Second part will be posted soon, probably.

Word Count: 1.9k

Part 2

"Oh hey, sorry if you fell in love with me. They always do…" and just like that, Illinois saunters out of the cave, leaving you with a rock and a banana. Cocky bastard you think. You look at the items in your hands, wondering what the hell you're supposed to do now. Some dust must have made its way to your nose because you sneeze. The rock turns to dust revealing a diamond inside. You gape, inspecting it for a moment before turning to the banana. You did get them from the same place…

You peel it.

Lo and behold, it's not just a banana, it's a golden banana. You ponder leaving and keeping all the treasure for yourself. Well, he didn't do anymore than you. Besides, he's the one who left you. You decide against it because, sadly, deep down, you're a good person. You run towards the exit, where Illinois went, hoping to catch up with him. You're far behind him, it seems, because you don't find him even after you exit the cave, where you find Mark. His suit is tattered and dirty and he's panting like he was just running for his life. Which… he was… technically. He looks up at you and glares.

"Thanks a lot, buddy, where the hell were you while I was getting chased by a sentient Boulder?!" He yells. You hold up the diamond and the gold. He raised his eyebrows.

"Forget everything bad I've ever said about you," he laughs and limps over to you. You wince at the sight and start to feel bad. "Where'd you find this?" You point to the cave. He laughs.

"We'll be rich! At least something good came out of the heist!" You furrow your eyebrows. Mark notices this and his smile falters a bit. "What's wrong?"

"I want to find someone," you say.

"You met them in there?" He asks. You nod. "Did he come out this way?" You nod again. Mark sighs. "Well… you brought this back… I guess it's the least I can do." You smile and throw your arms around him. He laughs and hugs you back. "Alright, don't get all mushy on me, now." He pulls back. "What does he look like?" You stare at Mark for a minute. He looks behind him, not knowing exactly what's happening. You bring your hand up and point to him. He points to himself. "He looks like me?" You nod. Mark crosses his arms in front of his chest. "Well, if he looks like me, how is he so special?" You tap your leg for a moment before answering.

"You know Indiana Jones?" You ask. Mark nods. You raise your eyebrows, expecting him to connect what you were saying. Mark laughs.

"He's Indiana Jones? Aw, are you a fan? Is that why you wanna see him again?" He teases. You glare at him and punch his arm. "Ah! Sorry sorry!" He stops laughing. "So, what's his name?" You pause, knowing what he's going to say as soon as you tell him, and he waits for your answer. You mumble incoherently. "Sorry?" He cups a hand around his ear and leans towards you. You take a deep breath.

"His name's Illinois…" you say. There's silence for a moment before Mark bursts out laughing. You almost start laughing too, but keep your composure.

"Illinois? Really?! Did he pick it himself?" He asks. You break and laugh as well. You both stand and laugh like idiots for a minute before stopping.

"So, uh… where exactly are we?" You ask. Mark shrugs.

"Something happened at the car… I think we teleported… somehow…" you punch the bridge of your nose.

"What even is today…" you sigh, annoyed. Mark chuckles and pats your shoulder.

"I know, I know," He consoles, Well, we should try to find society. Maybe we'll find your new boyfriend on the way" he teases. You scoff.

"One thing that I'm absolutely sure of is that he is not into me," you cross your arms.

"How do you know?" Mark asks. You clear your throat as you mimic Illinois' accent.

"Oh, and uh, sorry if you fell in love with me. Heh, they always do," you roll your eyes after you finish. Mark giggles.

"Oh no! He said that to you?" He asks sympathetically. You nod and sigh. He grabs your arm. "I am so sorry. But, if he doesn't like you, why do you what to find him?"

"Well, I wanted to return this diamond since he's the one who found the rock it was in," you explain. Mark stares at you like you're a crazy person. He takes a deep breath.

"That is uncharacteristically noble of you and I think we shouldn't," he says quickly. You gape at him.

"Mark!" You say accusingly.

"Well, he's the one who left before he found out! And he seems like a dick!" Mark sets his hands on his hips.

"He is a dick," you mumble angrily.

"Exactly! So… we can just… keep them! And sell them! And then we can be rich! Right? Wasn't that the purpose of robbing a museum in the first place?" He tries to convince you to keep the treasure. You sigh.

"No, Mark, we are good people…" you pause and Mark stares at you blankly. You start again. "We are… relatively fair people," he raised an eyebrow at you. You groan. "Ok we fucking suck. But this feels right! It's the right thing to do! Please, buddy? Pal? Friend?" You beg.

"Ugh, fine," Mark groans, "but I will use this against you at a later time." You smile and hug him. He tries not to, but grins and hugs you back. "So, which way should we go?" He asks.

"Oh, no, no, no," you chuckle, "you're not throwing this one onto me. You decide this time, sir."

"Oh. Uh… alright…" he rubs the back of his neck and looks around for a minute. "Uh… this way!" He points to the right of you, where there's a forest. You look at him weirdly, but follow him anyway. You two walk through the forest until you find a trail that leads you to a small village. You go up to a person.

"Excuse me, but, where are we?"

"Tijuana," the woman says. You feel like you've heard that before, but…

"Let me rephrase, what country are we in?"

"Mèxico," she answers. You turn to Mark.

"Mexico, Mark. We're in Mexico." You say.

"That's awesome. That's wonderful. That's great." He laughs, an angry tone in his voice. How the hell are we in Mexico?!" He yells. A couple people turn their heads, looking at him strangely. You set a hand on his shoulder.

"Easy, buddy. It's alright." You see a flash of red and look to the side of you. You see wheels as well. Your eyes widen. You walk to the car and see that it's the same one you used to escape from the museum. "Mark." You call.

"What?" He snaps.

"I found the car," You state. His eyes widen as he runs over to you.

"Holy shit, thank God" he sighs.

"So, I think it'd be about a two hour drive back to L.A., but we would need more gas…" you comment. You turn to the people that have gathered to see what you're doing. "Hi, um, is there… is there a gas station around?" A boy goes inside one of the houses and brings back a can of gas. You raise your eyebrows. "Oh, no, we couldn't-" He pushes it towards you.

"Tomas! Tomas*!" He pressures. You turn to Mark, who shrugs his shoulders. You hesitantly take the can from the boy.

"Gracias**," you thank. The boy nods and smiles.

"Oh, uh have you guys seen a guy? Looks kinda like me but with a hat?" Mark asks the people.

"Sí***, he went to the bar," A man explains and points to said bar. You and Mark walk over. You go inside and see that the only people inside are Illinois and the bartender. It makes sense, it's still pretty early. Illinois notices you and smirks.

"Well, look who came back?" He teases. "Miss me too much?" You stare at him, unamused.

"No." You say angrily.

"Sure you didn't." He chuckles. "Look, bud, i already said I was sorry if you fell in love with me. I also already said I was married to the adventure." He explains. Mark leans over to you.

"I'm not gonna lie, he is suave," Mark admits. You punch his arm. "Ow!" He whines.

"I didn't come back because I love you." You say, which is… partially true… but mostly false. "I can back because that rock you left me turned into this," Mark holds up the large diamond. Illinois' smile falls a bit. "And that banana I got wasn't a banana," you hold up your gold. Illinois looks at you two before regaining his composure standing up from the bar stool.

"Well, since that rock was found by me, you can hand it over here, partner," he holds his hand out for the diamond. Mark doesn't move. Illinois looks at his hand and back at Mark.

"Well… they were the one who actually found out it was a diamond… you, you cocky bitch, left. I feel like they deserve to keep it." He states. You look at him, smiling. He could be a dick, but he was still your best friend. Illinois blinks and scoffs.

"Oh, is that so? And who might you be?" He asks, putting his hands on his hips.

"I'm their best friend," he claims, "and I think they deserve this more than you do." You look at Illinois, worried. You didn't know if he was violent or not. He didn't seem like it, but you can't just assume. He squints at Mark, and then laughs.

"Ain't you a lucky one?" He turns and says to you, "That's some friend you got here. Tell you what, we'll go on another adventure. We'll split whatever treasure we find, but whoever finds treasure first gets to keep the diamond as well." He suggests. You look at him. He's arrogant. He knows he's gonna win. So do you. You could just walk away and keep the diamond, but you do want to spend time with him. Get to know him better. You're already in love, might as well ride the train till it stops. You take a deep breath.

"Alright," you agree, "let's do it." You reach out to shake hands. Mark stops you.

"You sure about this?" He asks, "We can just… go home. Head back to base. We don't even have to keep the treasure, we can just leave." You knit your eyebrows. He turns fully towards you and puts his hands on your shoulders. "I don't want you to get hurt. Please." Your eyes soften and you smile at him. You put your hands on his shoulders.

"I'm pretty smart, Mark, and I can take care of myself. I'll be fine." You try to convince him. He still looks worried. You hand him the golden banana. "Either way, we'll still have this." He smiles.

"Yeah… alright. Sure," he finally gives in, "but you better not die on me." He warns. You nod. You turn to Illinois, who still has his hand out for you to take. You shake it.

"Deal." You agree. He smirks.

"Let's get going."

---

*Take it! Take it!

**Thank you

***Yes

Pardon my Spanish, I'm on my second year lol

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Savannah

Jac: [Later than the Jesse convo, so drunker too, but still in the clerb] Jac: Total success, yeah? 🎉🍾💃 Savannah: 🙌 Jac: Are you having a good time? Savannah: YES! Savannah: I'm so glad everyone is nice Jac: it is such a relief Jac: so not like high school Savannah: ^^ we can stop waiting for the lives we want now Jac: yeah Jac: it's started Jac: and nothing is in our way now Jac: or no one Savannah: thank god Jac: You look beautiful Savannah: I was thinking maybe it's too much Savannah: if Sienna likes it Jac: 😂 Jac: You could pull off anything Jac: but I like it too Savannah: it's for you Savannah: I promised 💗 🌷 🌺 🌸 💗 Jac: You did Jac: my own uni wardrobe is lacking Jac: next time Savannah: it's REALLY not Savannah: you look perfect Jac: am I still sleeping over? Savannah: of course Savannah: unless you don't want to Jac: I do Jac: just checking  😊 Savannah: I know I stole ALL the blankets but I'm so sorry & I so won't do it again if you stay Jac: That's not what it is Savannah: do NOT use this moment to tell me that I talk in my sleep because I will die Jac: you're a total 👸🏾 in sleep too, don't worry Savannah: you're an 👼🏻 always Jac: do you have a drink? Savannah: Jordan was supposed to be getting me one but it's been forever Jac: I'll find him Jac: try to Savannah: We'll just get our own, I don't need a man Jac: 👏 Savannah: 🥂 Savannah: find me ✨ Jac: Might get distracted by the disco ball Savannah: you're supposed to only have 👀 for me Savannah: SO mean Jac: You know I do Savannah: 🥰 Jac: Do you think any of the lads are cute? Savannah: oh my god! That means you do! Savannah: who do you like? Jac: no it doesn't Savannah: it does, J Jac: I'd tell you if it did Savannah: I'd tell you if I thought anyone was cute Savannah: & them Jac: True Jac: just checking Savannah: I think Maddie is BEYOND cute Savannah: love that outfit Jac: She seems fun too Savannah: [goes to dance with whoever this girl is] Savannah: okay, she's really fun Jac: 👍 Savannah: come dance with us Jac: one sec Jac: [going outside or wherever] Savannah: 🥺🥺🥺🥺 Jac: I'll be right back Jac: got to talk to Dale Savannah: you've got to dance with me Jac: [gotta be at least 5 minutes before you do, have some resolve] Savannah: [excuse us maddie there's a moment about to happen here] Jac: [casually politely blocking you out here no offense] Savannah: [gotta be done soz] Savannah: [when they're both hot so you know lads who aren't even from their course gonna get involved] Jac: [at least you can swerve them more freely in a sassy manner] Savannah: [and we can sacrifice maddie to one that's she's vaguely into so thanks] Jac: [go get yours gal] Savannah: [leave them to their shameless gay vibe] Jac: [try to get out your head gal you can do it] Savannah: [we all know she's accidentally making this so ridiculous difficult for you rn] Jac: [we're not any more sorted than we were lbr ladies] Savannah: [tea] Jac: [so productive] Savannah: [making you come to the toilets with her so she can fix her makeup/admire herself because of course] Jac: [just admiring her too tbh] Savannah: [likewise because now is the time for a shameless hair touch like lemme fix that for you and all the ensuing compliments because Savannah is me] Jac: [😳😳😳😳] Savannah: [when she's inherited her father's complexion so obvs the bae sees but she thinks it's adorable 'you feel things so deeply, I love that about you'] Jac: ['one of us should appreciate it, like' 🙄 at self] Savannah: ['of course I appreciate you, you've always been everything to me' be gayer please gal] Jac: ['almost everything' 'cos you drunk enough that that can slip but then you nudge her like 😏 lol lol total bants] Savannah: [when that hurts your heart so much it'd be obvious on your face for a split second at least before you cover it with your own 🙄 at self like I can't believe I like boys ugh] Jac: [reflectively putting your hand on her shoulder like no it's okay, I'm sorry and covering that by finally being like 'at least you don't like Jordan] Savannah: [taking that hand and positioning her arm so you can look at her tattoo that matches yours like you're relieved she still has it, also without thinking about it but then being like oh shit so you just have to say 'I like being single' even though she did not ask and it's not true] Jac: [when we know you better than that, babe so the really? is on our face v hard but we not being judgy with it and we show that by touching her tattoo lightly] Savannah: [the 'rude' is on her face but playfully we're not actually offended but we shrug because she does mean that she doesn't wanna date another Milo for so many reasons, cos that was a time in both their lives we know] Jac: ['he's probably having such a shit time' in a comforting forget him way, 'cos of course you know what she think of, at least who] Savannah: [she's so not above being buzzing at the prospect/hoping he is so such a happy face again] Jac: [lols] Savannah: [putting your lipgloss or whatever it is on her cos it's nothing too dramatic where she'd be like no and we can pretend that's why you're shamelessly staring at her cos that idea struck you to do a makeover moment and not cos you're gay] Jac: [not at all thinking about the other way you coulda put that on her, nah, doing a kissy face like tah] Savannah: [tucking her hair behind her ear/playing with it like you're so concerned it could get stuck to this gloss okay] Jac: [having to yeah HAVING to take her hand to get her out 'cos bathrooms in clerbs are always packed like come on] Savannah: [she's clearly about it] Jac: [go dance some more] Savannah: [that's what we are here for, a chance to be gay af without either of us freaking out] Jac: [mhmm, live and let live ladies] Savannah: [it's like expected of straight girls at this point so] Jac: [we all hoe dance at the clerb] Savannah: [god bless, come through with that drink jordan, where you been?] Jac: [who are you where are you so many questions also making him go get you one too shamelessly like thaaaanks] Savannah: [when you a bad bitch like your mother] Jac: [don't be making enemies though gal] Savannah: [someone should make an actual move on either of them tonight but I can't decide which way round I want it] Jac: [hmm, there's a case for either way isn't there] Savannah: [because it could be a girl in Jac's case cos don't need an A+ gaydar to be knowing which would be awkward and freak her out but obviously it could be a boy too which would #confirm Sav thinking she's not gay but obviously it'd hurt her heart if some boy or girl is all over Sav and she thinks she's into it so] Jac: [i say let it be a girl and jac for the freakout we can probably use that the most] Savannah: [it has the henchest legs in terms of a idea I agree] Jac: [hoot] Savannah: [how do you want it to happen like are they still dancing or what's the craic] Jac: [I think they go back to their tables to be social a bit and this girl pops off] Savannah: [love that, what type of lesbian are you gal, what would be the most awkward? butch maybe] Jac: [yes like undeniably so lol] Savannah: [I have such a mental image rn] Jac: [a fuckboy who is probably gonna give feminist rants in your lectures, marlene hello lol] Savannah: [her more butch cousin because k-stew is still too soft] Jac: [ruby rose] Savannah: [mhmm] Jac: [just shooketh like how did you know #exposed over here] Savannah: [meanwhile your bae is oblivious talking to whoever else] Jac: [when a girl has never and you can't outright run or anything 'cos these your classmates] Savannah: [like you could run gal but you gotta be subtle about it you can't just be like I need a piss RN cos then she might think you wanna hook up in the bathroom lol] Jac: [oh no no, keeping this convo dry sweaty] Savannah: [at least you can always say you're not out if she won't take the hint because it's against gay law to out someone so] Jac: [bye ruby rose] Savannah: [you can run now if you want gal] Jac: [if she's the kind that can be chill enough to be friendly and not totally in your face, you should stay, 'cos trying here for that new rep] Savannah: [#growth] Jac: [don't wanna be alone again at any cost] Savannah: [so sad and so true] Savannah: I'm doing my best to be a social 🦋 but I miss you Jac.: Come and save me then Savannah: [does but does the thing where they end up sharing a chair like oh hey, you're lowkey on her lap gal neither of you are smol enough for this] Jac.: [when you can fully get into the bit 'cos you are just tryna let this girl know you're not interested, sure babe, like Sav is touchy-feely anyway but she'd be less so naturally but playing with her hair rn] Savannah: [😳 but her skin tone is not giving her away so we're fine] Jac.: [needlessly whispering/loud whispering 'cos clerb in her ear instead of tryna shout to the whole group 'cos we sending a message here ok] Savannah: [we know she doesn't need any encouragement to join in with that because that's shamelessly a vibe for them anyway like soz Isabelle] Jac.: [we've not changed that hard and have no intention to really lmao and can't fault you] Savannah: [more dancing like you've just gotta cos THIS SONG but we know why really] Jac.: [we know the vibe] Savannah: [just dancing til you're actually knackered and do need to sit back down for a bit] Jac.: [is there anything else we wanna/do we wanna let anything go down/however small it might seem] Savannah: [the temptation to make it even gayer is so real but it's like the L bomb dilemma of like is now the right time/do we wanna prolong the agony longer but I feel like something needs to happen] Jac.: [this is day TWO, freshers is intense by default everyone thinks they're gonna be friends forever, and the way most people do it you're like drunk the whole week, so I feel like something could reasonably happen/should, even if we then take however many paces back] Savannah: [you gotta do it Savannah it's your turn to put yourself out there gal] Jac.: [we can all pretend we don't remember lol #doitdoit Savannah: [I just can't decide if I want it to happen at the club or when they're alone having their sleepover moment cos pros and cons to both] Jac.: [like the tension is high in both scenarios but maybe have enough wherewithal to not let your classmates 👀 'cos they so close as is people will be like OH YOU A COUPLE, although, we COULD do that if we wanted, hmm] Savannah: [Savannah just like yes she's the love of my life, Jac like I AM SO CONFUSED] Savannah: [but in all seriousness I am leaning towards the sleepover because if they're alone and then Savannah is like well that didn't happen, Jac's just like did it happen though, like am I actually losing my mind/dreaming really vividly here like] Jac.: [I vibe, you can go harder but deny as hard] Savannah: [exactly because you know they're gonna go really hard this has been such a long time coming] Jac.: [mhmm] Savannah: [plus I love the cinematic visual of them having no makeup or sassy outfits on when this happens like you're really making yourselves vulnerable here aren't you gals] Jac.: [and in a single bed, of course, Jac having literally not slept in hers, like] Savannah: [she hasn't yet, that actually kills me] Jac.: [y'all could've shared if you been knew at this rate lmao] Savannah: [I also like the idea that they don't stop because they get interrupted or any of the things we normally throw at people but because Savannah actually says that she wants to/isn't ready to go any further than this because they do have good communication and also it shows that like she did wanna do what actually happened even if she does deny it later] Jac.: [That was literally the vibe I had too so same page] Savannah: [yet more vulnerability cos you have to be like can we stop but you're not scared to] Jac.: [and at least that's some clarity so Jac is going to be the opposite of mad about it, obvs] Savannah: [y'all had and lbr still have so much trust that it just makes sense] Jac.: [the last thing you want/wanted was to ruin the friendship that's the whole mood we're not being reckless out here] Savannah: [snuggle and be soft in that small bed ladies] Jac.: [live your best lives, we'll worry about it tomorrow] Savannah: [unrelated but cos I just looked up their heights I 100% vote that Sav was as tall/taller than her last boyfriend and he was annoyed about it because he is not Jimothy] Jac.: [you gotta be confident to own that so yes 100% no heels for you gal] Savannah: [Ty can be taller cos basketball boy so you could've worn them then #thegoldenage] Savannah: [okay so I'll write what we said here for future ref 1. Jac wakes up and her bae is gone so she's freaking out thinking that Sav is for obvious reasons but 2. Sav has only gone to get coffee or tea or whatever because that bitch and that gay so she comes back with breakfast and Jac's gone so she's like ??] Savannah: Where did you go? Jac.: I thought you wanted me to be gone Savannah: Oh boo no! It was supposed to be a nice surprise Jac.: Oh Jac.: well Jac.: that's embarrassing then Savannah: I can just bring the 🥐 to you Savannah: the ☕️ will probably get cold so I will be drinking it on the way, sorry Jac.: I'm sorry, that was weird Jac.: got out of the practice of this whole friend thing, clearly Jac.: that sounds good, you can see the inside of my dorm, I definitely owe you by this point Savannah: You don't even need to be sorry, I literally should have woken you to say I'd be right back but you looked SO adorable Savannah: though I'm not sure how I didn't already by like making my secret escape Jac.: but it was a good surprise Jac.: feel like a total 🥳💩 now Jac.: I'll use my time to ponder how to make it up to you Savannah: I can think of another one, it's fine Savannah: to be honest the ☕️ isn't that good anyway Savannah: [spoiler alert it is good and she's lying to make her feel less bad lol] Jac.: I do need caffeine though...what state do you think the kitchen will be in 🤔 Savannah: I love you but I don't think I can go in there for you Jac.: 😂 Jac.: I won't penalize you for being productive and getting out of bed to forage Jac.: that would be beyond rude Jac.: I'm gonna buy a kettle for my room, definitely Savannah: Literally any excuse to go shopping again is endorsed Jac.: I'm down Jac.: these rooms are so old-fashioned by default, there's no such thing as over decorating, it's a decent challenge Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: I'm so upset we aren't roommates Jac.: Nat is in David Russell and it's so clean and modern looking in comparison inside Jac.: AND they've got doubles Jac.: but that's the price we pay for the more traditional experience again Jac.: I know, if only we HAD known Jac.: next year, we can share Savannah: I get the appeal but I personally do NOT want to be reminded of home Jac.: I feel you, plus that's like where EVERYONE lives, social 🦋 or otherwise, I want my peace and quiet sometimes Savannah: A bigger bed would be AMAZING though, I can't sleep in the curled up in the foetal position every night of my life Jac.: I won't be there taking up space every night, it'll probably feel doable then Savannah: Baby, I hate to do it like this but you're only average height Jac.: 😂 Jac.: oh, I'm sorry, it's those extra FOUR inches that make all the difference Jac.: what about Dom, he's gotta be like 6'5, spare a thought for him fully hanging off the end, like Savannah: Obviously they do Savannah: but yes, at least I'm not planning to have a sleepover with Dom any time soon, I'm sure he's BEYOND relieved Jac.: No one could be relieved about that Jac.: you're such a thoughtful host Savannah: if we weren't literally in Scotland I'd almost believe the 🌞 came out then Savannah: but it's just you warming my heart Savannah: being the sweetest ever 💛 Jac.: Even if we DON'T wanna be reminded of home, the culture shock of constant 🌞 would be too much Jac.: you deserve 🍧🍨🍦🍰🎂🍭🍬🍫🍩🍪🍯 Savannah: Well, I'd acclimatise for you, obviously Savannah: & develop a sweet tooth Jac.: You're perfect how you are Savannah: I'd look even more perfect with a tan though Jac.: I'd look even more like my mother Jac.: which is arguably the same thing but Savannah: & not a bad thing Savannah: Your mum is so pretty Jac.: I know Savannah: your whole family is a different level, honestly Jac.: 🎁 and a curse, I guess Savannah: like the Cullens if any of them were actually cast hot in the film Jac.: 😂 Jac.: how hard can it be to find perfect clone-looking actors, really Savannah: 😄 Savannah: thanks for not being a vampire, even if we are in the perfect ☁️ 🌧 climate Jac.: as far as you know Jac.: might only wear my fangs on weekends Savannah: excuse me, I know all your secrets Jac.: Perhaps Jac.: 😏 Savannah: 🥺 Jac.: Awh, baby Jac.: 'course you do Savannah: I can't believe you're making me walk right now 🥱 Savannah: can we PLEASE go back to bed Jac.: we should, if we're hitting sinners tonight Jac.: apparently it's carnage Jac.: sports lads, and girls, are always mental Savannah: I don't think I'm going to that Jac.: Not your scene? Jac.: A night off isn't a terrible idea, even if you have to keep that 🤫 from some of our more... enthusiastic classmates Savannah: Even if I didn't desperately need to apply a hair & face mask, I need the reminders of jock types less, I did my time Jac.: How true Jac.: Somehow Tyler would've been more annoying if he also had a brain that wasn't 🏀 Savannah: Don't be mean, he was really not that annoying for a boy Jac.: That's what I'm saying Jac.: his lack of opinions was welcome Savannah: are you going? Jac.: I was gonna Jac.: but I'm not fully sold either way Savannah: oh, so you want me to convince you to stay with me Savannah: okay Jac.: My hair is obviously looking SO glorious without the mask so Jac.: yeah 😉 Savannah: I told you, I'll think of another surprise Savannah: something to do that's more worthy of us Jac.: I believe in you Jac.: ☕🥐 and the rest Savannah: I won't let you down, baby Jac.: Never have Savannah: Well, once Jac.: I'd let you down first Savannah: it's no excuse though Jac.: That's well in the past Jac.: now we have a future Jac.: you've just got the morning after blues Jac.: you need to come back to bed Savannah: you're right Savannah: [show up gal cos it only takes like 12 minutes] Jac.: [has definitely cleaned up this kitchen so they can sit up the table and have their breakfast, also put a tea on 'cos duh] Savannah: [when you can blame how happy you are to see her on the fact you've had 2 caffeinated beverages] Jac.: [we know you getting a big hug 'cos feels so stupid/so relieved that what you thought had happened hasn't] Savannah: [casually dying any time she's affectionate with you because not a touchy feely bitch like you are and of course that's the only reason okay bye] Jac.: [have your gay breakfast gals] Savannah: [we chatting about the night but so casually avoiding what happened at the end like] Jac.: [lol this is all so fine and dandy] Savannah: [truly] Jac.: [if you're both committing to it, it'll work for now ladies] Savannah: [and you clearly both are for your own reasons] Jac.: [mhmm] Savannah: [case in point just going back to bed like that's fine] Jac.: [lmao and we all know you ain't going out tonight girl] Savannah: [we all know you're going on a date] Jac.: [yes we'll have to find somewhere appropriate] Savannah: [yeah gotta be aesthetic] Savannah: [we can skip to that if you want cos we also know when you wake up you just living that pampering life] Jac.: [makes sense to me] Savannah: [okay so picnic is first is there anything we wanna ref happening during that other than them being happy nerds? like obvs you're gonna have to snuggle for warmth that's a given] Jac.: [clearly someone has taken that pic for them 'cos her face so I like to think some extra hoe was like OMG YOU'RE SO CUTE lemme] Savannah: [100% an american] Jac.: [lmao absolutely] Savannah: [thinking they a couple like you're not ready for that convo random gal] Jac.: [don't need to go into it with you, they should also do some gardening, those nerds] Savannah: [oh shit yes obviously you have to start a garden together] Jac.: [even if they just get rid of the dead stuff that's been left and prep it for spring, we'll look up the situ of what to plant 'cos when they go to the botanical gardens etc they can buy things and get inspo] Savannah: [I love that for you ladies] Jac.: [we know the vibe, it's gonna be cute af, nothing is gonna be said/done 'til you go out and get some alcohol] Savannah: [yeah hence I'm trying to find an aesthetic restaurant for you to get on the wine lol] Savannah: [okay gotta hit up the balgove larder flower shed and farm shop for supplies because aesthetic af and they have an insta we can steal from even if we don't eat there] Savannah: [I think the rav looks v aesthetic and they have cocktails as well as a wine list so] Jac.: [sorted, babey] Savannah: [okay so obvs we are gonna try and do posts but is there anything you wanna ref here as happening/do when they are drunk enough] Jac.: [we could talk when we get back, like just do dialogue and actions] Savannah: [I think that's a good idea, who's dorm are we saying?] Jac.: [probably Jac's] Savannah: [has kinda been your base for the day so that makes sense]

[rogue-barnes-16]

RUSSIAN ROULETTE (Destroyer fic)

Request: just watched Destroyr too nd I'm thirsty for a fic nd saw you're taking requests from it. Can you do a fic where chris goes undercover with the reader instead with erin and when the Russian Roulette shit happens the reader does something to stop it nd chris confronts her later or smthng || idk it's a messy request sorry. || Pls make it anon??? || lol srry XOXO

Pairing: Chris x reader (Destroyer)

Genre: angsty (?) idk how to describe it

Tags:

Permanent taglist: @notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @sinviix @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125

Warnings: not actual spoilers (that's a warning), tension, makeout, language

A/N: first of, I feel like I should make this clear again THIS DOES NOT CONTAIN SPOILERS BUT IT IS BASED ON A PART OF A SCENE OF THE MOVIE. Also, DAMN I enjoyed writing this. Also, it soothed the pain caused by the movie (thanks Nicole Kidman, you lovely human being, for destroying my heart). Anyway, enjoy <3.

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

I lay down on the sofa, giving Chris a brief glance to check on him. A while ago, I could have just asked him since all the party noise would have covered our voices, but it all had gotten really quiet.

People had slowly left, and in the house there were just a few people left. Silas, sitting on the armchair; Petra and that other girl, checking their messed up makeup in the mirror; Toby, playing some random video game; Chris, sat right behind Toby, and Arturo, who was coming my way in the moment.

"look what I found" he shook the pack of beers on his right hand, a mischievous grin on his face.

"reinforcements" I extended my hand for him to give me one. "nice, I needed it" I opened the one he gave me and took a sip.

When Arturo made a hesitant attempt to sit besides me, I moved my leg for him to have more room. "looking gorgeous today, Y/n" he said, half cuddling me.

Arturo was kind of pinning over me, I knew it. I sometimes, if I was in a playful mood, would lead him on. He knew I 'was with Chris' —even though we weren't actually together—, so there was nothing else apart from teasing and light flirting.

Chris, however, to pretend, most of the times would play the jealous boyfriend card, but right now he was distracted.

There was someone who was noticing it, though. Silas had his eyes on us, and, if I only had noticed it before, I would have stopped.

But I hadn't.

I jumped at the loud thud that sounded right besides me. When I turned to it, I saw a small gun on the floor.

"Arturo" Silas called the boy besides him. He tilted his head to the gun with a sick smile on his face. "let's see if your time has come?"

The room, now silent, was filled with anxiety and tension.

I tried playing it cool, but the fear in my eyes gave me away. I knew I was being too obvious when Chris decided to intervene.

"fuck it, Arturo" he said carelessly, not looking at anyone, but at the joint he had just rolled. "don't do it" he added, lighting up the joint before giving it a puff.

"it's none of your business Chris" Chris replied at Silas' statement with a gesture of indifference while he let out the smoke. "C'mon Arturo, grow a pair. Don't wanna play?"

I knew things were about to get worse than expected when Arturo got up and grabbed the gun from the floor.

"there he goes" Silas commented, letting out a dark chuckle. "c'mon, come here and look at me in the eye."

I stole a glance at Chris, who was subtly staring at me with almost unnoticeable nervousness in his eyes.

"Wait" all of them turned to me. "he doesn't wanna do it." before Silas could protest, I gave him a knowing smirk "doesn't have what it takes"

"sweetheart, it's done" Silas made himself more comfortable before looking at Arturo again. "someone gotta play now, so go ahead"

I wasn't going to allow that to happen.

"I wanna play." I stated, standing up. "and I definitely got what it takes" I made my way to then, noticing how Chris' breath hitched, making him swallow the smoke and causing him to cough. "c'mon give me the gun"

Arturo gave me the gun, not before looking at Silas for approval. "Okay sweetheart" the man sitting before me let out a chuckle. "same rules. Gun against your head and eyes on me"

"Silas, c'mon" Petra, who had stayed silent until then, spoke with a trembling voice. "don't- babe, let's drop it."

"Nope, babydoll" the man replied. "c'mon Y/n, make the roulette spin, will you?" it took me a second, but I managed to made the cylinder spin without looking at it. "atta girl."

"baby, quit it" I heard Chris voice, but I didn't really listen to it. "leave it, c'mon" I took a deep, shaky breath, and, when I felt my eyes watering, I pulled the trigger. "Y/n!"

Nothing happened.

I exhaled, tossing the gun to the floor and shutting my eyes. "Y/n, sweetheart, you're nuts." Silas started to laugh, giving me a surprised look. "it was loaded. You can't let people tell you what to do like that" everyone started to chuckle lightly too.

"it has three bullets inside" I turned to Chris, who was holding the gun with the cylinder open. "holy fuck" he managed to feign a laugh and I exited the room, feeling my whole body shaking.

"Chris, go get your crazy girl" Silas said, not able to stop laughing. "go and fuck, she'll calm down!"

I heard heavy steps behind me before a large hand grabbed my forearm, dragging me into a dark room. "what were you thinking" Chris hissed, shutting the door. "what the fucking hell, Y/n?"

"he-" I chewed my lip harsh enough to draw blood, while my back rested against the wall. "there was three bullets, you said it yourself. I knew there was a trick."

"so what?!" he hit the wall besides me, taking a shaky breath "it was damn obvious there was a fucking trick. That's not a reason for you to play the Russian fucking Roulette"

"what if he had killed himself?" I asked, hugging myself in a vain attempt to refrain my goosebumps.

"better him than you"

"Silas gave him the gun because of me. 'cause he was flirting with me" I explained "I didn't want his death in my conscience" I replied, gripping my forearms.

"yeah? Well I didn't want a bullet in your fucking skull and I almost got it" he bit back, choking on the last few words. "do something like that again and you're out"

"you can't fucking do that" I stated. "we're undercover, you can't make me leave."

"fuckin' bet, baby" he growled, trying to pass by me and open the door. He couldn't, though since I put myself between him and the door. "move your ass out of my way, Y/n"

"you really wanted one of the criminals we're chasing to get killed?"

"I swear to fucking God Y/n-"

"Tell me" I shoved him back for him to get away from the door "that you wouldn't have done something like that if you thought it was the right thing to do" when he, instead of replying, growled under his breath with his eyes on the ceiling, I repeated, "fuckin' tell me you wouldn't-"

We heard the door's lock clicking open and I panicked, afraid someone might have heard us.

"fuck"

I took a glance at the door, which was being opened.

"shit" When I turned to Chris again, I barely had time to process that he, with his hands gripping my hips, was backing me against the wall before hurriedly crashing his lips against mines.

"Hey guys- Okay" Toby stood there, holding onto the door frame, for a long minute, watching us making out. "they're fine!" he yelled, turning back to the room where everyone was. "I think they're gonna fuck!- sorry for the interruption, I'll give you some... Privacy"

With that, the door closed again and we were left alone in the dark. It was only when we were sure we were safe, that Chris let go of me.

We stood close to each other, breathing heavily. From my current angle, the moonlight made the tears in his face gleam.

Those tears that I didn't even know were there. Those tears that kept running down his cheeks nonstop.

"what are you fucking looking..."

He went silent when my arms wrapped around him, gripping the back of his jacket with both of my hands.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry" I whispered. "but I don't regret it. It was the right thing to do. Arturo didn't deserve that shit, you know it"

"you didn't either" he circled my hips, pulling me flush against him, like I was going to banish. "Goddammit, Y/n. You didn't either" he muffled a brief sob by burying his face deep into the crook of my neck. "God fucking damnit."

"nothing happened, Chris" I mumbled in a shaky breath, bringing him impossibly closer to me. "I'm fine"

"you scared the shit out of me" he muttered under his breath, letting himself rest against me. "I was so fucking terrified-"

"we're alright" I whispered, pulling away to wipe his tears.

After a beat of silence, he leaned on me an planted a tender, careful kiss on my lips. And it was easy to tell that this one wasn't feigned. This one had Chris' actual feelings on it.

"what was that?" I muttered, slightly confused.

"two weeks deep into this and you already put your life on the line three times" he explained with his jaw clenched. "I'll better come clean 'bout my feelings before you do something stupid and get yourself killed." I nodded, not really knowing what to say. "you... Don't have to- we can just keep pretending, it's fine with me" he cleared his throat, fidgeting with the hem of my jacket. "but, just in case, I needed you to know"

I nodded again without letting any word escape my lips. He waited for an answer that didn't come, and after a few seconds, he cleared his throat again and walked to the bed.

I frowned at him sitting on it. "we should wait a bit." he explained "they think we're fucking so-"

"it's gonna make it more complicated" I blurted out, half wining because, damn, I wanted to be with him. To actually be with him.

"why?" he questioned, resting his elbows over his thighs. "because we'll get too attached? Because we'll get hurt if something happens to the other?"

Those questions made me angry because they were, in fact, the reasons I was going to give him. Now that he had said them out loud, I realized they were stupid reasons.

We were already too attached to each other. We would get hurt anyway if something happened to one another.

"Y/n, I need you to say something"

I walked to him, sat on his lap, and caressed both of his cheeks with my hands. "Okay. Let's do this" I replied, pulling him into a kiss that was, by no means, meant to be rough, but ended up being it.

"Listen" he pulled away for an instant to take off his jacket and mine. "don't you fucking dare to play the Russian Roulette ever again."

"Okay" I pulled the tee off my body and tossed it to the floor. "I won't"

"promise you won't do anything stupid" he demanded, leaning to kiss my jaw, just to pull away to throw his shirt besides mine.

"I promise"

"Good" he cupped my cheeks, bringing me closer to kiss my lips. "cause I'm not sure if I'll be able to stay undercover if something happens to your reckless ass"

[funny-relatable]

your kinda obsessed lol

Host: *places bag of wash-off punk tattoos on the counter* Yeah, I want to return these. I tried using some but they just gave me a really gross rash and I figured that I need the money back to go to the hospital since my mom kicked me off our health plan and... oh. Hey, Hel.

Co-Host: *stares silently from across the counter*

Host: Fancy seeing you here at Hot Topic... hehe...

Co-Host: I work here.

Host: Bullshit! Since when?

Co-Host: Since we graduated high school. You know this.

Host: ...Alright, I know, but I didn't come here to see you. I legitimately want to return these tattoos.

Co-Host: Okay.

Host: You don't have to act all weird about this. Just give me my money back for the tattoos and I'll go along my way.

Co-Host: Sure.

Host: ... *awkwardly rubs arm*

Co-Host: We don't sale this brand of wash-off tattoos.

Host: ALRIGHT, I DIDN'T GET THE TATTOOS FROM HERE! I just wanted to see you. I miss you. I miss us. I miss hanging out. I don't even remember why we broke up, to be honest.

Co-Host: You cheated on me tons of times and I kept forgiving you like an idiot. You never took anything I said seriously. You pretended our relationship was a game, and then you let a weird fleshy thing grow into a clone of yourself instead of getting rid of it like you promised me you would.

Host: That's all in the past.

Co-Host: Not really.

Host: *slams fists on counter* You're being over-emotional!

Co-Host: Eh, whatever.

Host: *knocks tattoos onto the ground* I can't fucking stand you! You're the worst! *storms out of the Hot Topic*

Host: *returns to collect the tattoos* Bitch! I don't even like you! Also, Hot Topic is for poseurs! *storms out again*

Host: *peaks back to make sure co-host is looking*

Co-Host: *waves nonchalantly*

Host: *slinks away, downtrodden*

Co-Worker: What the fuck was that all about?

Co-Host: Just my ex. ...She has issues.

Co-Worker: I mean, I could tell. Are you alright?

Co-Host: Yeah, she doesn't bother me. She's like a kid, y'know. Besides, her life is pretty fucked up right now.

Co-Worker: Maybe you should get, like, a restraining order.

Co-Host: I don't need one. Besides, I doubt she'd worry about it anyway. I'm going on break. You've got the register, alright.

Co-Worker: Sure thing, Hel.

Co-Host: *goes to backroom of the shop*

Co-Host: *hyperventilates*

Co-Host: *vomits into a trash can*

Co-Host: *has vivid memories of murdering the flesh mass*

*elsewhere*

Flesh Mass: Eh???

Maid: Is there a problem, ma'am?

Flesh Mass: I just got this weird feeling that someone was thinking about me.

Maid: I was thinking about ma'am, ma'am.

Flesh Mass: Okay, I don't care. Are you recording?

Maid: Yes, I am recording, ma'am.

Flesh Mass: Okay watch this. *slices an axe into her arm* AAAUGH! FUCK! It didn't even slice it off! It just hurts like fucking hell! Oh my god! Jesus! Why the fuck did I do that?

Maid: Does ma'am require assistance?

Flesh Mass: Yes! Pull it out!

Maid: *pulls the axe out of the flesh mass's arm*

Flesh Mass: AAAUGH! Fuck!

Maid: Does ma'am require medical attention?

Flesh Mass: No, no. It'll heal itself. Oh my fucking god, that was a stupid idea... hey, have you heard of the deep web?

Maid: Yes, ma'am. I access it daily to assist master in obtaining illicit materials.

Flesh Mass: Fuck yes! Do you think this will go viral? What if one of those horror youtube channels covers it? What should we name it? It has to be something simple, but edgy and modern like... axe.avi. Or axe_chick.avi. Or axe_arm.chick.avi. Or... uhh...

Maid: One does not usually upload videos to the deep web if they want them to go viral, ma'am. That defeats its purpose.

Flesh Mass: Okay, then we'll start with liveleak and then move onto the deep web! We're going to be so famous.

Maid: *sighs* If ma'am believes so.

Flesh Mass: *arm falls off* ...Shit.

[borathae]

~Chapter 26~ I just want to say I LOVED this chapter so much. Them making up and all the fluff 😚👌💕 My heart really needed that. Also how you describe Namjoon in your story is exactly how i think he is in real life. Like always having some really well worded advice that sounds so well thought out but he didn't even have to think about it that hard, it just comes naturally to him. Where does one find a Namjoon? And the tea part? Excuse me? That was a whole movie moment. 😭 Eternity biiitch 😭 I had literally so many song options for this chapter but at some point I had to stop myself lol

🖤 My Everything - Ariana Grande

In this chapter or rather in the time between this & the last chapter oc accepts that she wants jungkook back in her life and said let's work on what we have bc it's far too powerful & special to just dismiss it because someone made a mistake which can be worked out. I think she always knew this but now she accepted it. "I've cried enough tears to see my own reflection in them and then it was clear, I can't deny I really miss it." I think oc realised this especially once jk revealed he needs time to think and that's when it hit oc that he might not come back and that she actually can't live without him. "To think that I was wrong, I guess you don't know what you got 'til it's gone. Pain is just a consequence of love. I'm saying sorry for the sake of us. He wasn't my everything 'til we were nothing. And it's taken me a lot to say. And now that he's gone, my heart is missing something so it's time to push my pride away 'cause you are, you are, you are my everything."

🖤 It's Gotta Be You - Isaiah Firebrace

I actually think this song represents both their povs. "I hear a million voices in my head telling me the things I should have said. I don't know why I let you go, oh I learned the hard way. Tell me it's not too late. Now my arms are open wide, they're hanging forever there, waiting forever, for you. I won't give up on you this time cause I ain't holding up, for nobody else. It's gotta be you."

🖤 Blind (Acoustic) - PRETTYMUCH

I can just see jungkookie laying alone in a motel bed pretending this is seriously over, crying himself to sleep and when he closes his eyes all he sees is oc. "I lose my mind before I see you and I separated, no I'm so scared to lose you, never choosing to let go. Love's so fragile, anything could happen, and we know. Hearts made of glass, but somehow we last. Yeah we made it, no I would rather be without vision 'fore I ever watch you leave. [...] I'd be better off blind. [...] When I close my eyes all I think about is you."

🖤 Here To Stay - Josh Devine

Jungkookie is here to stay 😭 "My heart on the line, so you'll never doubt the mountains I'd climb for us now. It's all about us now. I fooled my heart, let it break. I know this time we won't fade cause all my love's here to stay. [...] Through the dark fight our way. I know this time I can change. [...] I'm giving up everything for this, we'll figure it out I promise."

🖤 Call You Mine - The Chainsmokers & Bebe Reha

I'm sorry but that's literally their story if you replace bar with diner. "When we thought that we couldn't get higher things started looking down. I look at you and you look at me like nothing but strangers now. Two kids with their hearts on fire, don't let it burn us out. Think about what you believe in now, am I someone you cannot live without? 'Cause I know I don't wanna live without you, yeah come on, let's turn this all around. Bring it all back to that bar downtown when you wouldn't let me walk out on you, yeah. You said, 'Hey, what you doing for the rest of your life?' and I said, 'I don't even know what I'm doing tonight'. Went from one conversation to your lips on mine and you said, 'I never regretted the day that I called you mine'."

🖤 Fire Meet Gasoline - Sia

This is what I imagine playing when oc just can't take it anymore and literally throws herself at jk and they hug so tight he can't breathe 😭💖 "I ache for love, ache for us, why don't you come, don't you come a little closer. So come on now, strike the match, strike the match now. We're a perfect match, perfect somehow, we were meant for one another, come a little closer. Flame you came from me, fire meet gasoline. [...] I'm burning alive. I can barely breathe, when you're here loving me." Also "I got all I need, when you came after me"

🖤 Can't Help Falling in Love - Haley Reinhart / Kina Grannis

Those are two separate covers but I just can't decide between them. You know just the whole 'so you really want me to stay?' 'yes we complete each other' vibe. "Shall I stay? Would it be a sin if I can't help falling in love with you? Like a river flows surely to the sea. Darling, so it goes, some things are meant to be. Take my hand, take my whole life too. For I can't help falling in love with you."

🖤 Best Years - 5 Seconds of Summer

This relates to the last chapter where jk realised he wants to build a life with oc. And this just sounds exactly like something he would say to her when they're sitting together on the couch 😢 "You've got a million reasons to hesitate but darling, the future's better than yesterday. [...] Gave you a million reasons to walk away. But I'll build a house out of the mess and all the broken pieces. I'll make up for all of your tears. I'll give you the best years. [...] I promise, darling, you won't regret the best years."

🖤 Black And White - Niall Horan

Same as the previous song and also this is literally their story. "That first night we were standing at your door fumbling for your keys, then I kissed you, ask me if I want to come inside 'cause we didn't want to end the night. [...] Yeah, I see us in black and white, crystal clear on a star lit night in all your gorgeous colors. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life. See you standing in your dress, swear in front of all our friends there'll never be another. I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life. Now, we're sitting here in your living room telling stories while we share a drink or two. And there's a vision I've been holding in my mind, we're 65 and you ask 'When did I first know?' I always knew."

Okay, okay so I gotta go on and hurry up with replying to your messages fjsdfjas. Excuse my lazy ass, but I really want to take my time with your messages and saDLY online classes didn’t let me until now 😔🤧

Honestly I totally agree with you, this is highkey how I imagine Namjoon to be in real life as well. Also no joke, working on Namjoon was always so much. I really loved his parts in the story. They were so healing for me to write hahfhads 💜 

Also I am literally so happy that you enjoyed Chapter 26 so much, it is one of my favourite chapters from the story as well. It is just so healing and cute. Like that part when Kook makes her all laugh and Namjoon is all like “damn that bitch laughs really weirdly” but Kook is all like heart eyes for her. do yOU HEAR ME CRYING IN MY ROOM?? 😔😭💜

Imma put the rest under “read more” because your bitch has a lot to say hahHAH

My Everything - Ariana Grande

Your description just hIT me like a truck. HAHAHHA BYE I am laughing in pain 😭😭 Oh god I don’t even know what to add because you described it just so perfectly well 😭😭 I caN’t here I am cryIng at the first song you recommended 😔

It’s Gotta Be You - Isaiah Firebrace

Okay lis t EN I am :( I will literally start sobbing right here and now 😭 like omfg that part when he is all like “When you walked away my heart tried to replace ya with someone like you, but I could never find it. I don't want to find it.” if that isn’t the reader trying to move on with Hoseok but realising just how much she needs Kook. But also at same time it’s Kook all trying to pretend that they have broken up, but ending up crying every night because he misses her so much. I will now cry 😭😭

Blind (Acoustic) - PRETTYMUCH

Okay you just changed my mind, this is IT. This is most definitely Kook being all sad and heartbroken in his motel room. Nooo lisTEN I AM FAR TOO EMOTIONAL I AM SOBBING :( Okay but also this part, listen this part: “I'm so scared to lose you, never choosing to let go [...] When I close my eyes all I think about is you. This is real love.” if that isnt them being all like “I’ll never let go again” later when they are cuddling in bed :( 

Here To Stay - Josh Devine

Okay... why are those lyrics literally so damn accurate?? Help I am scared? They are literally so accurate hgnfgnan bYE 😭😭😭 also omfg I didn’t know this song and I freaking love their voices. They just HIT right 😭 I can’t jajsdj like every song you’ve recommended as of now made me cry (in a good way) 😭 like just that part “We'll figure it out I promise cause all my love's here to stay.“ I will throw myself away 😭

Call You Mine - The Chainsmokers feat. Bebe Rexa

listen anonie I wanna smooch you. I do not know how you always manage to find songs that just F I T so right, I am comBUSTING 😭😭 gosh this is giving me such hardcore memories of how it felt like to start writing this story (lil fun fact for you guys, exactly one year ago I started working on the Cocktail Trilogy 😔) I can’t this would fit so well to a lil flashback, showing all the amazing times they had together. Like them just driving down the coast, the reader has her arms around his waist while Kook is sneaking a glance her way and smiles. Like just imagine 😭

Fire Meet Gasoline - Sia 

Omg the moment you described 😭 this is it. I can imagine it so clearly. How Kooks eyes widen in surprise at first before they flutter closed. How he nuzzles his face into her shoulder and twists her sweater in his fingers so she would never leave again. How she is squeezing her eyes shut and twisting his hair to press him even closer. Now that they are finally together again it feels so right. The world could burst into flames all around them and yet they wouldn’t let go. Nothing matters for them except the other person. 

And now I made myself sOB again  😔😭

Can’t Help Falling in Love - Hayley Reinhart / Kina Grannis

OKAY LISTEN NO JOKE I LISTENED TO THE KINA GRANNIS COVER WHILST WORKING ON THAT CHAPTER! I love that song so much and holy shit the lines you chOSE YES!! 😭😭 this is song is them 100%, I don’t make the rules and I thank you for recommending it 😭😭

Best Years - 5 Seconds of Summer 

Anonie you are out to make me cry 😭😭 (first of all I love 5sos so much) HOLY SHIT LISTEN THIS IS TOO MUCH 😭😭 I can’t, I literally can’t. This just broke me HHAHSH 😭😭 like if that song isn’t the moment when he is all like “you won’t regret it I promise. I’ll make you so happy.” liKE HOLY FUCK MY HEART IS ACHING 😭😭 anonie seriously thANk YOU, you don’t even want to know how often I have listened to this song whilst working on Purple Rain. Good god, this just awoke so many memories 😭

Black and White - Niall Horan

ANOTHER SONG I CONSTANTLY LISTENED TO WHILST WORKING ON PURPLE RAIN 😔 anonie I can’t believe that three songs of my “writing songs” also made you think of Purple Rain. Fuck I can’t, I’m currently listening to it and I am sobbing HAHAHH 😭 like okAY listen, do you want to know which scene I always think about when I listen to that song? The one day when Kook took her to a junkyard and then when they later drove up a mountain to watch the city. And it’s that moment when they are both just like screaming on top of their lungs and then end up falling into each others arms because they are just so goddamn fucking alive when they are together 😔

Honestly anonie thank you. This playlist was such an emotional rollercoaster to listen to (in a good way). Holy shit it awoke so many memories and fuck, you just get me and my story 😔 thank you anonie, I really fucking love you 😔💜