#some with fidds and some without :))

[noodles-and-tea]

How does Ford react to Fidds taking Stan with him on a creature hunt? A sea based hunt at that.

He gets a lil jealous

[wormspoodle]

posting stuff i haven't posted here before the year ends or something

[keen-eye]

McGucket: i’ve abandoned my own professional aspirations and have been neglecting my wife and our young son to be with help you make yours come true, i’m utilizing my mechanical genius just for you, here’s a gourd and an axolotl that remind me of you, here’s a snow globe of our lab, here’s six-fingered gloves I knitted for you, i’ve stayed by your side despite being repeatedly traumatized by these terrifying monsters, i’ve put my mental and physical health in jeopardy for our project, i’ve built a memory erasing device so that I can fix my anxiety and continue helping you, *erases your memory* forget I said that, here’s a thesis paper I’ve written for you so you can publish your research and end this dangerous and isolating endeavor, i've sacrificed so much, did I mention I left my wife to be with you

Ford: *keeps truth about project a secret*, *throws gourd away*, *puts you in harms way*, *dismisses your fears*, *frustrated by your lack of commitment*, *takes you for granted*, *breaks snow globe*, *suspicious of your intentions*, *questions your loyalty*, *releases axolotl*, *prioritizes and trusts a triangle over you*, *accuses you of betrayal*, *calls you weak-willed*

(^ imagine the vine boom after each one)

[dimonds456]

Gonna say something controversial.

Ford Pines is a nuanced character who is neither good nor bad. Absolving him of his crimes is actively a detriment to his character and does a disservice to the storytelling of Gravity Falls, but defining him exclusively by his mistakes without taking the time to understand him is a purposefully bad faith take that actively makes your enjoyment of the show worse.

He is neither a good or bad person, because "good" people and "bad" people aren't real. There's just people. And people fuck up sometimes.

If no one fucked up and if no one held onto those fuckups sometimes out of sheer desperation, the world of fiction would be way more boring, unengaging, and dull.

Ford Pines is a mess and I don't want him to be sanitized or demonized. I just want him to be a mess.

Thank you

[pix-writes]

Gravity falls AU idea I've had

Bill cipher is just some (charismatic, psychopathic) guy, except! He runs a cult at the time that Ford is deep in his research in gravity falls.

I'm calling it the Ciphertology AU (if someone comes up with something better I'm all ears tho)

Rest of it under cut (mentions tbob and same level of dark content as is in the book/website, just as warning) ⚠️

So, the university contacts Ford to ask him to investigate the psychic claims that this group deep in the forest, not too far from the falls, has. Ford grumbles that he isn't much of a people person to carry out such research but he's the one nearest to the area and they've agreed to send over Fiddleford, since they're friends and as his assistant he can act as an objective observer (since he didn't study parapsychology) and it pays well.

They both inadvertently get sucked into bill's cult in different ways! Ford is drawn in by his seemingly high intelligence and helpful nature, assured within himself that he wouldn't be fooled by fraudsters or fakes due to his background/intelligence, ends up treating Bill reverently (his 'muse' and one he trusts, because it fills the loneliness he feels, especially because before he began interviewing ciphers group, he felt guilt for not contacting his brother) before coming to a fast and cruel awakening that he's not who he says he is! Bill isolates him from his parents and tries to make him believe he's the only one who understands him, he obstructs his work being sent to the university too.

Meanwhile, poor Fidds had been pulled into addiction from the cultish hippie use of drugs in the group, but ended up slipping into mental health issues and realising that his friend is being manipulated and leaves. tries to persuade Ford to leave, trying to convince him that bill's evil but it doesn't go well ofc and he leaves and tries to set up a counter protest with a load of other people in gravity falls to get rid of the cult, which ends up kicking him out when he has a mental breakdown. By this time the FBI is alerted and they have the cult on their watchlist.

Ford is tortured, similar to how he is described to in tbob and journal 3 (except probably without the possession side of it, haven't decided if that's something he'd be able to do/is real in this au) and he's kept at the isolated cult camp against his will. But he does manage to get hold of a phone and call his brother. Stanley to the rescue! He isn't told fully just how bad it is but sensing bullshit, he high tails up to the falls as fast as possible ❤️

Stan is horrified by the way Ford's been treated and angry that he's still making excuses for the group (poor ford is so sleep deprived so the coercive control is going to take a little while to be unconditioned from) and quickly manages to get him out of there!

Takes a while, and not many people believe the stan twins story, but eventually Bill is caught for other crimes and is sent to a max security psychiatric hospital (basically a prison). (Stan and Ford in the aftermath keep close eyes on the cult from a distance to try and get justice.)

They end up forgiving each other and settling their home base in the falls, since now the rest of the town either hates bill or wants to forget he existed. Stan sets up his own tourist business in the falls whilst ford heals and eventually he ends up working as a lecturer and travels about to a few different colleges in the area for work. After the trial where Cipher is put behind bars decades later, the stans make their childhood dream happen and go sailing around the world for 2-3 years!

Oh, and Ford ends up reconnecting with Fidds, as after some time his son Tate tracks him down and gets him to a place where he can recover and be treated for his mental health. Their contact helps them both get through the trial because now they can finally talk to someone else who experienced the cult. Maybe they even contacted some others who were also drawn into the cult who were victims?

Dipper and Mabel come for the summer like in the show, except now they know of their two eccentric grunkles, though the whole cult story is kept from them for a while (they end up finding out somehow).

...And that's as far as I've got with this idea! I think there might be room for Bill to escape and the pines family coming across him during a future summer? Like maybe because of Ford's involvement with the cult he still has possession of some of Ford's journals/information after he escapes/is set free? Idk. What do you think?

[thelastspeecher]

Fun Fact #1: String players and pianists tend to have long fingers. Not because those instruments attract people with long fingers, but because the repetitive stretching of fingers required to play lengthens players' fingers over time.

When the adult tasked with helping Angie with her powers in Pollution Powers AU finds out she can play fiddle and piano, she is tasked with practicing those instruments to work on her power control as it impacts her fine motor skills. Angie didn't bring her fiddle with her to the school, but there's a piano there, so she practices piano while she waits for her fiddle to arrive. The first time she sits down to play, she practically has a panic attack at how much her fingers stretch.

Fun Fact #2: Vocal pitch is determined by size and thickness of vocal cords. Lower voices have larger, thicker vocal cords, while higher voices have smaller, thinner vocal cords.

Once Angie gets some general control over her powers, she's given exercises of higher difficulty, one of which being adjusting her vocal cords to change her vocal pitch. She's able to give herself a crazy vocal range by using her powers, without changing her outward appearance whatsoever.

[fordtato]

Alex Hirsch will imply or say through text and subtext of books about FiddAuthor and BillFord, while Dan Povenmire and Swampy Marsh will just have Perryshmirtz moments on Chibi shorts and tiktoks... and you know, sometimes I'm glad I get to live in this world. (I made this weird train of thought connection through the ending joke in Bill's interview in the book.)

SPOILERS: Look, no matter how one feels about it, Hirsch used terminology associated with romance and breakups throughout nearly every interaction between Ford and Bill. "Attracted-to," "will-they-won't-they," "were we even partners?," starting a conversation after a fight with "Can we talk?", calling Fiddleford a "third wheel," etc. - THESE ARE QUOTES.

Also, Bill uses language that is INCREDIBLY tied to abusive relationships when talking to Ford: "who else will make you feel like this?" etc.

Hell, Bill goes on a drunken bender after the breakup. Mabel calls Ford Bill's ex, and tells him to "get over" her Grunkle.

I've seen some discussion on the timeline on whether or not it's problematic to make BillFord canon and my thoughts are: this book DEPICTING an abusive pairing (or at least using language that echoes an abusive relationship), and then framing it through the lens of an unreliable abusive narrator is not the same thing as glorifying, romanticizing, or supporting the pairing. The people reading this recognize that Bill is a villain and not to be trusted, you know? It isn't even shades of grey, it's 100% depicted as the most ruinous thing in Ford's life. Hell, I think it's just very compelling writing. I love this. I think it's so interesting. Books should be able to tackle this.

And then the Fiddauthor fodder. The FIDDFODDER. He handmakes Ford two xmas presents, and makes nothing for Emma-May??? HE COMES BACK FOR FORD AFTER HIS FIGHT WITH HIS WIFE? AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES IN COLLEGE? AND FIDDS MADE 5 PROTOTYPES TO HANDKNIT FORD GLOVES??

The book also has a reference to Ford possibly being ace. Ford has nightmares about a pop quiz asking him what he's attracted to. He answers "planning and preparation." So, I have layered feelings about these tongue-in-cheek references to asexuality without just SAYING asexuality, you know? Like when it's wrapped in a joke, I think it affects how meaningful it is, but I'm not ace, so it's up to ace people to decide how they feel about this. But I do think it's interesting.

At the very least, this book adds queer undertones to the way Ford and Bill interact. Book of Bill gave more queer undertones in the TEXT, not just subtext, to how Ford interacts with others, and while that experience is translated through an abusive relationship, it's still there.

Y'all, this man is queer. I can't believe I'm not seeing everyone talking about this. Ford is queer. I don't know how to define his relationship with Bill Cipher, but it isn't straight.

[softersynths]

How did Shifty feel about Ford and Stan fighting?

Does he take a side? Or does he stand to the side, and hope they work things out?

Also weridmagedeon…?

Does Shifty ever end up having at least a decent relationship with Ford or Fiddleford or both?

How does he feel about his…would they technically be his niece and nephew? Uh—second cousins I guess? American family naming conventions are confusing. I say this as someone who is half.

Also do you have sweet moments to share about Uncle Stan and Shifty/Nicky?

I want to draw a lot of this but for now I'll answer in text........

Shifty reacts like a kid watching their parents argue: with worried helplessness. At least at first. He missed Ford terribly, but Stan was a father to him for much longer. When Shifty learns that Ford intends to kick Stan out at the end of the summer, it causes a great deal of friction between them. He’s no longer the clingy pet that Ford left behind, he’s a person who loves Ford’s brother deeply, which Ford struggles to understand.

As for weirdmageddon... I think maybe he ends up with Soos for most of it. When they reunite with Stan and the refugees at the shack, Shifty is able to reconcile with McGucket, and they help build the shacktron together.

Post-canon he has a good, if occasionally strained, relationship with both of them. Negative feelings and memories are difficult for him to let go of. But he still wants family in his life, and seeing the process of Stan and Ford (as well as Tate and McGucket) reconciling helps him a lot.

I think the first time they 'meet' after McGucket gets his memory back, Shifty calls him 'Uncle Fiddleford' without really thinking about it, and all of McGucket's paranoia gets blown out of the water. His wariness of Shifty dies when he meets him with a clearing mind and sees, in place of a monster, a frightened, lonely young man - one whose feeling of loss, and confusion over his identity, he deeply relates to. McGucket's guilt and Shifty's bad memories make them hesitant to reach out to one another (and McGucket's erraticisms still startle Shifty after 30 years of avoiding them) but after Stan and Ford leave for the Arctic, they spend a lot of time catching up. They could potentially get to the point where Shifty is calling him 'Pa' rather than 'Uncle Fidds'.

He loves the twins, and wants to be liked by them. The 'Nicky' identity is invented by Shifty and Stan once they learn the twins will be staying the summer, explicitly to be a "distant cousin" that their parents "forgot about" (him being anything other than a Pines never even crossed their minds). He's distant at the beginning of the summer bc he worries about revealing himself, but becomes like a big brother to them both as he gets more settled into the role. His modus operandi when interacting with them is “what would Stan do with me” - and then he does that. A lot of riding on shoulders and affectionate noogies. He tries to steer them away from Gravity Falls' weirdness with little success. He bullies Dipper a little too. LOL.

As for sweet moments...... As a kid, Shifty would occasionally turn into a dog (or some other furry animal) and sleep next to Stan in his bed. Stan kind of misses it (he would never admit this). Shifty can also turn into inanimate objects (albeit living ones) and in the first couple winters frequently turned into scarves and coats for Stan to wear. Yes, Stan found it strange and clingy - but when you’ve spent months freezing in your car, you’ll take what you can get. Stan also teaches Shifty a lot of best practices for shoplifting and identity fraud. Which he uses frequently. lol

[jubileebloom]

As much as I appreciate the people defending Ford in the wake of TBOB's release, and discussing the importance of avoiding victim-blaming and being aware of a person's environment, there's something specific that rubs me the wrong way about some of the things I've read.

The thing about abuse is that takes agency away from its victims. This is actually something that broadly applies to different forms of trauma, as I've just been going over in one of my classes on Adolescent Development. My professor for that class specializes in trauma-informing and training, so she has an entire unit on trauma as part of the syllabus, and one of the things she emphasized was that giving people agency and control over their own choices is critical to helping them recover from a traumatic event.

When it comes to Bill's possession of Ford, the lack of control is even more literal. Ford literally has his body puppeted by a demon, and his mind altered as well. Others have taken agency from him to a lesser extent—Stan limiting his choices in education, Fiddleford potentially using the memory gun on him, as another analysis post I can't find did a really good job of breaking down—but it's not as all-encompassing as Bill's abuse, and Stan and Fidds both make better choices later in the series. Bill refuses to.

But I'm getting off topic. My point is, Ford's loss of agency is one of the most crucial pieces of his character arc. It's why he lashes out so strongly when he returns home, against his will, to find that his identity has been stolen. It probably factors into his need to be the "hero", to be the one to defeat Bill. And even though he ultimately isn't that "hero", and he does let the Mystery Shack continue to operate, he does ultimately get more of a choice in the matter. He chooses to go along with the plan. He chooses to go with Stan on their long-overdue adventure.

But there's something else he does too. He apologizes.

Why is that so important? Because in regaining his sense of agency, he also undertakes the accountability that goes with it. He isn't solely to blame for everything that happened to him, or even necessarily every choice he made, but he did make bad choices.

And that's the thing that bothers me about some Ford analyses and defenses. Some people go too far and say that Ford isn't to blame for anything that he's done. Not only is that untrue, but it is once again stripping him of his agency. He is an adult capable of making his own decisions, and ergo capable of making bad decisions. And we need to accept that, without infantilizing him or blaming everyone else around him.

One of the things that compels me so much about Gravity Falls is that is generally does strike this balance pretty well, of personal agency vs. external circumstances. (There's also an excellent analysis post out there somewhere about Dipper and Mabel's agency, how the show doesn't force them to fix the problems of their predecessors or burden them exclusively with saving the world, but does still let them have agency and power in the fight and in Stan's recovery.) There are so, so many things that happen to the main cast that are mostly outside of their control, and also bad decisions that a lot of them have made that cannot be excused, at least not fully, by their circumstances.

And the beautiful thing about that agency is that these characters are also able to use it to become better people, to regain control over their lives, to take back power after it was taken from them. But you have to let them, and that includes letting them be people who messed up, owned up, and worked to make it better.

In fact, I think the reason that Ford is so quick to own up to his mistakes when it comes to Bill is because that's one of the ways he's taking back his power. He's incredibly stubborn when it comes to holding other grudges, but with Bill, he readily admits to Stan and Dipper separately that he's made some "terrible mistakes", to use his words. And he isn't to blame for falling for Bill's manipulation—Bill was the one actively manipulating—but no, he should not have summoned him to begin with. That doesn't make him deserving of anything Bill did to him, but by admitting to the mistakes he did make and working on a way to defeat Bill, it's letting him take back some amount of control in the whole situation. He can't make Bill change his ways, but he can own up to and correct the things he did wrong.

He does overcorrect a bit; I do think he blames himself too much for "falling for Bill's flattery." But generally, I like how he also doesn't try to blame Bill for every single thing that went wrong with the whole portal deal, like he (initially) did with some other situations, especially everything with Stan.

Anway. Let Ford make mistakes. Let him be wrong sometimes. Let him have his agency.

[artisiumstudios]

PART TWO

Part one (OMG I FIGURED OUT HOW TO DO THE LINK THING WITH WORDS LMAO)

Anyways people want context so here it is:

Separation at birth AU (name is a work in progress) where Filbrick Really didn't want twins and lies to Caryn saying that only one of the twins made it out. Here he decides to keep Stanford because he thinks that maybe he can use his deformity (having 6 fingers) as an attraction, especially considering his wife is a psychic. So Stanley is given away and Filbrick is the only one who knows about this. Until now. so a couple of things:

Stanley: Despite him always being portrayed as being a people person and very charismatic, which he is when he wants to be, he was actually a loner as a kid since he struggled a lot in school (dyslexia). Without Stanford, Stanley had no one to help him out academically, not to mention his "adoptive" parents were quite neglectful resulting in him feeling like an outcast and even joining a biker gang during his early teenage years (13-14). Until he met Fiddleford Mcgucket, his only real friend (and more) who helped him which lead to him actually realizing that he was actually very intelligent. Which ends up with both of them going to West Coast because of it (both as engineers, Fidds for computers and Stan as a Mechanic) (also Stan does have glasses but he either refuses to wear them or just wears contacts.)

Stanford: Has a role much like Gideon, where basically he is some sort of psychic and is called the Psychic Sixir (yes spelt like that) and becomes a rather famous tourist attraction for the Pines, even resulting in getting a couple of commercials. Unfortunately, he hated the role he had to play. Yeah he was famous but he was a social outcast especially with his peers. His only sanctuary were books and an old boat he found in the beach. Ford is still very smart, and while he had always dreamed of sailing away on that boat he found and repaired growing up, it was far too lonely and his parents (specifically Filbrick) would never allow him to, so his best choice was leaving to a high leagues school. And here we are

anyways thats all I got now.

Next

[ckret2]

Do you have any theories about the "Better World"? Or headcanons about this parallel universe?

I've seen some people theorize that it's a sham somehow—that actually Ford turned into a villain or he's secretly being possessed by Bill or he died and Fiddleford didn't want to say so or it was all an illusion or something like that.

I don't think that's the case. I think it'd undermine the narrative importance of the Better World if it weren't real.

For it to work in the story, Ford has to really, actually see his own ideal perfect alternate life—the life where he got everything he (thought he) wanted, where he got to benefit from all of Bill's lessons and still kick Bill out when he became inconvenient, where Stan helped out on Ford's own terms and never hindered him again, where Fiddleford remained his assistant with his sanity intact, where Ford got the fame, the money, the research institution...

Ford has to see that—and still end his narrative arc by proudly showing off a picture with the Mystery Shack family and saying that that's what his happiness looks like.

If the Better World is somehow fake, then it means Ford didn't really decide he's happiest with family rather than with "success", because he never actually got to see what his life could have been like if he'd succeeded. If the lesson is "you fool! the kind of success you wanted was never possible in the first place!" then he didn't choose between family and fame (an important, emotionally poignant choice), he only chose between family and fruitlessly chasing a fame he never could have achieved (which is a much easier, obvious choice. I'm not deeply touched that a man chose to let go of his ambitions for the sake of his family if the narrative tells me his ambitions were unattainable in the first place).

So I think the Better World is exactly what Journal 3 says it is.

I only have one headcanon about the Better World that's outside what we see in canon:

While the "meeting your duplicate will destroy you" thing may or may not be true (it wasn't true in Dimension MAB-3L, but different physics might be at work), the real reason Fidds didn't at least try to set up a video call or something between the Stanfords is because Better World Ford is can-barely-get-out-of-bed depressed.

The Better World is where Ford achieved everything he thinks he wants; and I think, if he got what he thought he wanted, he would have learned that no amount of world-changing discoveries, academic success, public praise, award ceremonies, or glowing speeches made on his behalf would ever make him feel like he's made it—and so he kept going and kept going and went higher and higher until he reached as high as he could possibly reach and discovered there's nowhere further for him to go and still he isn't content with his life.

And he'll never feel like he's made it until he feels like he's loved and accepted—unconditionally, with or without the scientific achievements.

And he'll never feel unconditionally loved in a world where he never sees his closest family again.

(I think this is similar to what happened to Bill. He's achieved what seems to be some sort of godhood and he's not happy. He runs a dimension and he's not happy. He has a gang of zealous followers and he's not happy. He finally invades Earth and takes over Gravity Falls and he's not happy—we never see him partying with his Henchmaniacs. And if we'd seen Bill's own Better World—if he'd taken over the universe—he still wouldn't have been happy. And he wouldn't have understood why. What MORE can he do?)

But Worse World Ford can't see the Better World as a cautionary tale. This isn't his Scrooge-with-the-Ghost-of-Christmas-Future moment. He has to see only everything he ever wanted—he has to see that he WON, and yes, he REALLY DID win, he really did accomplish ALL THOSE AMAZING THINGS—and then he has to realize for himself that he wants his family more. He made his choice out of love for his family, not out of fear of the alternative.

[thesituationship]

Hmm i'm seeing a lot of mixed opinions in the billford community about fiddleford. I want it to be known that I love fiddleford because he's a problematic king.

In a way, the portal trio's story is about control and autonomy. And I looove how fiddleford and bill directly parallel each other in that respect. See, both fiddleford and bill are scared of losing ford. Because, although ford is smart, brave, kind, he's also defiant, reckless, independent, unsupportive. Both characters desperately want ford to follow them, to trust them. But, at separate points in the story, they both realise that ford is a wild card. And that makes them feel uncertain, powerless.

Both fidd and bill become so desperate that controlling ford seems like the only way to feel some security. With fidd, it's removing his memories. With Bill, it's possession. They both violate fords autonomy and both ultimately fail. Because they realise too late that, although control removes the need for trust, it also destroys trust. Ford is literally kept close but emotionally pushed away.

HOWEVER

it's where fiddleford and bill differ which is really interesting to me. Fiddleford is very clearly an anxious and insecure character. And we learn that it's his fear and uncertainty that causes fiddleford to violate ford's autonomy. Bill appears much more confident and powerful than fiddleford. But we realise it's a lie when bill begins to violate fords autonomy just like fiddleford did. That tells us that, despite his facade, bill is experiencing the same fear and uncertainty that fiddleford felt.

It's a really clever way of showing the depth in bill's character without having to explicitly say it. Alex Hirsch loves to write like that - writing the conflict clearly and simply, then writing a similar conflict in a way that would have been difficult to interpret if he hadn't already given you the tools to understand it.

It's good writing anyways ily fiddleford

[cricket-of-the-hill]

So what's the deal with Fiddleford McGucket? Why's he like that?

Fiddleford as a character is so FUN because he's so complicated and tragic and honestly a little pathetic. On one hand you have this absolutely brilliant scientist with the potential to have been the in universe Steve Jobs who figured out that the universe is a hologram and built an honest to betsy transdimensional portal (with Ford's help, yes, but let's be honest: as mathematically brilliant as Ford was, I think his intelligence laid more in the theoretical side of things, really doubt he could have actually built the portal himself).

On the other hand, we have this man who up and leves his FAMILY to chase after a college friend who calls him one day saying "hey, I'm out in Oregon building a portal to another dimension. Little help?" and he doesn't even think twice before being like "bet" and getting his ass to Oregon. And even if you take in the context clues that things weren't going well with his marriage before he left (as pieced together by the brilliant @divorcedfiddleford in this post), he still had his son and McGucket Computermajigs and he just sets all that aside for this guy, which... 😶

I am gonna write this whole post on the assumption that Fiddleford was in love with Ford, but look, even if that's the case it doesn't make any of his actions less unhinged. Break here, because the post gets kinda long 😶‍🌫️

So here's the thing: in the fandom, it's fun to think that Fidds knew about Bill and they had some sort of taunting rivalry/love triangle thing going on and that's really fun to mess with, but FIDDLEFORD HAD NO IDEA ABOUT BILL. Ford never told him! So even if Fidds leaves California thinking he's gonna have his hot girl summer/queer arthouse romcom where he reconnects with the love of his youth and they spend the summer working in this secluded house in the woods where they can finally live out their romance, what he actually gets is a fucking psychological horror thriller where the guy he loves and is kinda trapped with is either slowly going insane or straight up getting possessed.

Now, all that is 😵‍💫 enough, but it gets worse because instead of doing the normal person thing and getting the hell out of Dodge, Fiddleford stays. He continues to help Ford to build the portal despite how weird the other man is getting, he continues to go cryptid hunting even after the nightmare goblin almost eats him, even if Ford clearly doesn't appreciate the work he does (research assistant? Not even partner? Come on), and never reciprocates the kind of gestures Fidds has towards him (like the infamous double Christmas gift bonanza).

Here's where the duality of Fiddleford Hadron McGucket kicks in: the thing is that he is incredibly brave in some ways and obviously really smart but also kind of a coward and an idiot when it comes to his relationships with others. He'll hit Thee Krampus upside the head with his banjo one day to save his friend and run away to Oregon instead of discussing divorce with this wife the next. He will leave everything he knows to pursue this one guy, but he will never ever ever confess to feeling anything other than friendship towards him. He'll put up with Stanford's creepy as all hell behavior but will never confront him about it even as Ford loses more and more of himself into his project (so no little intervention not even to help this man he's giving so much up for). Like, what was he expecting to get out of all this? If he was never planning to confess to Ford or leave his wife, what was he going to do once the portal was completed? Just keep on bouncing between wherever Ford went next and his family? Did he really think his wife and son wouldn't mind him leaving them behind without so much as a thought?

Operating under the assumption that Fiddleford is a closeted queer guy from rural Deep Down South Hillbilly County Tennessee (said with love, I'm also from the south, but we all know what homophobia looks like here) during the '80s (height of the aids pandemic which would have made everything worse) one can maybe understand why Fiddleford is like that. Why he is so so so afraid and why he ultimately chooses to erase his memories rather than just go back to his family.

So picture this: you are in love with your best friend but you can't tell him 'cause best case scenario he leaves you out to dry and worst case scenario maybe someone finds your boots down by the river and lets your parents know (and we know Ford is sweet and fruity himself and with a thing for outcasts and would never. Fiddleford probably knows that himself, but let me tell you that when you grow up with that fear it goes deep. Because you've most likely seen people who are kind get absolutely bent out of shape when confronted with the mere idea of someone like you existing in their near vicinity). Eventually, you get married and have a son because that is what you were supposed to do all along and even though you love your son and maybe even love your wife everything feels wrong. They expect you to be something you are not, you can never let your guard down, never be yourself, not even in your own home. So then that call comes and it's like a golden thicket: you can leave, give it a rest for a little while, go see your friend, stretch out those inventing muscles.

As much as the fandom clowns him for it, I honestly don't even think he went out there with the intention of cheating (emotionally or otherwise). BUT I do think he was hoping something would happen. It's just that it all depended on Ford taking that first step because Fidds sure as hell wouldn't. And then Ford didn't because he was too busy doing the sin cos tan with his trigonometry homework, but if he had, we could have had a brokenback mountain situation on our hands, lads. Then Fiddleford could have just gone along with it, and done all sorts of mind parkour to convince himself that that's somehow less bad than "outright" cheating on his wife.

So he gets to the cabin, right? And maybe things are good for a little while, like when they were in college. Fiddleford lets loose a little, Ford is happy with the company, they're friends! And I get the sense that they're the kind of friends that mesh really well, like their energies really match. As much as the fandom paints Fiddleford like a sweet cinnamon roll, that man is also a freak. He's out here building psychotic post divorce revenge pterodactyl robots and drinking abducted cow milk just to see what it's like. He's a bit unhinged! He and Ford are the two people in the world that can be like "I think the universe is a hologram." "Cool! Let's prove it mathematically, bro" and "I want to build a portal to another dimension. Just cause." "Catching a ride to your place with my toolbox as we speak, buddy." (My own personal head cannon is that Fiddleford didn't really become such a shaky jelly until the nightmare goblin got him. Like, he was never as adventurous as Ford, but I think before that particular traumatizing event he was all right for it).

Anyways, things are good for a bit, but the real world is still out there. Fiddleford has to make trips home every now and then, and every time he comes back it seems like something is different. A little off. At first it's nothing big, just a smile a little sharper than usual, a coldness in a look, Ford calling him "Specs" where before he was always a variation of his name. Then it's pointed comments that Fidds chalks up to a lack of sleep (is Ford even sleeping at all? Because he could have sworn for the past three nights he he has appeared in the same place Fidds left him when he went to sleep). Then it's a flash of yellow eyes, a maniacal laugh that Ford never used to make before, spells where he seemingly forgets how to use his body (bumps into things, tries to drink soda with his eyes?). As time goes on it starts to become more and more obvious that something is seriously wrong with this friend. And things back home are just getting worse and worse, Emma May isn't happy about Fiddleford skipping town so often, Tate wont stop asking for him, and look, was Fiddleford even making money while he was with Ford? He gettin' paid? Is Emma May back home trying to bring home the bacon while virtually single parenting? (How was Ford even supporting himself while studying anomalies? I can't imagine there's a lot of grants for that.)

But Fiddleford can't leave his friend and he can't really own up to how much messier things are at home because of this whole thing. So he keeps coming back to Gravity Falls, where he also can't really face up to Ford and either demand a clear answer as to what is going on or try to get him some help (an exorcist, maybe). Because if he does say something and Ford decides that he doesn't want Fiddleford around asking questions he's gonna have to go back home where after the Christmas thing he's honestly not sure he's really wanted anymore, not really sure he deserves it if he still was. So he keeps on doing his thing, telling himself "this is fine 🙂," while he sits in a room on fire with a bill-possessed Ford hanging from the ceiling like a spider and an disapproving Emma May looking in through a window.

I think the portal incident was what finally opened his eyes to the reality of his situation, in an ironic way. He destroyed his relationship with his wife and left his son for nothing. Left his own dreams and aspirations aside just to find out that when push comes to shove his opinion and well-being matter so little to this man he was ready to break the laws of physics for. He can't stay with Ford, and he sure as hell can't go back home, because that would mean having to face that he's done burned down all his bridges. So where do you go from there? Let me tell you, if I had the chance to forget the lowest, most selfish, stupid thing I did for a person who didn't even notice it, I'd do it in a second.

[fridgrave2-0]

I'm tired of pretending that I'm okay with ford being an absolute asshole towards fiddleford and basically abusing him.

first of all, yes, it's not ford's fault that he was manipulated (doubtful tbh) and abused by bill, but that doesn't give him the right to be a jerk who closes his eyes on his friend's deepest traumas. the traumas fiddleford got only because stanford completely ignored his warning and got fidds involved into bunch of shit. like his monster hunting which wasn't even the reason fiddleford went to gravity falls in the first place. he was there to help ford build the portal, not to be a part of ford's anomaly quest. and when fiddleford spoke out against it he was ignored because ford doesn't give a shit about anyone else but himself or his muse. fiddleford got traumatized physically and mentally so deeply that in the need to be able to sleep at night peacefully he completely destroyed his mind to the state that even bill was scared to be in there. and what stanford did? he (the one who couldn't care less about fidds warning him about gremoblin) critiqued fiddleford for using the memory gun and didn't even bother to apologize or say that he's sorry in the journal. god, what am I saying, he didn't even took fiddleford to the hospital after fiddleford feel from the sky through the roof of a fucking barn with a dozen of poisonous quills in his body AND A BROKEN ARM. ford described what happened to fidds in the journal, said he "took him home for a treatment" and the next two paragraphs on the other page is "good news the hyperdrive works" LIKE IS THAT THE ONLY THING YOU CARE ABOUT WHAT THE HELL??? "despite our fortune, I have become worried about my assistant... I myself have survived many monster attacks without trauma, but perhaps F is more sensitive that I realized". no shit sherlock, who would've imagine that seeing your worst nightmares and being poisoned can leave a mark on your mental state. sure it's just fiddleford, he's just overreacting because he's "sensitive"))) /src

ford was ignoring fiddleford's concerns all the fucking time that mcgucket was there with him, he took a superstitious and religious guy with anxiety into the forest with real ass monsters who's no one but ford is used to see. fiddleford was warning stanford about shifty and got kidnapped with his identity stolen by the shapeshifter because ford didn't listen. well, at least this time stanford had bothered to apologize for another traumatic event- ah no, next thing ford said is that when the portal is finished all the traumas fiddleford had been through were "worth it". ford just finds ways to make everything worse

we all know that fiddleford has an addictive personality and that the memory gun is the biggest example of that. what we don't talk enough about is that ford at some point decided that sleeping is for losers, but didn't stop at himself and made fiddleford drink 13 fucking cups of coffee, not allowing him to sleep, what in the future made fiddleford a caffeine addict. ford is not only an overworking idiot who gladly damages his own health, no! he wants fiddleford to be the same and quote "gets frustrated" when fiddleford cares not only about his own, but their both basic needs. fiddleford had to work on the portal, get in the trouble with monsters because of ford, but also babysit this manchild to prevent him collapsing from exhaustion (which is more impossible than building a giant portal into the multiverse)

and here we are, the portal testing. once again (and as always) fiddleford did warned ford about everything. fiddleford was working without breaks for days to make sure if the portal will work, and when he found the flaws, he wrote a whole fucking thesis paper, putting all ford's research into a solid work (not taking even smallest credit even tho he was the one to build the portal. when fiddleford had his own theory in the university, ford helped him to only proof that fidds wasn't going crazy by checking the calculations and ford bothered to take the credit for the whole theory, but fiddleford who was a part and a victim of this monumental theory of weirdness didn't took it because he unlike ford doesn't care only about fame). but what did stanford do? he assumed that fiddleford wanted to steal his fucking fame and backstab him. ford didn't even bother to look at something fiddleford was making for three days without resting to make sure that portal won't hurt anyone in the town and that ford won't end up with empty hand if the portal was indeed a lost cause. stanford coldly dismissed fiddleford like they weren't friends, said that he doesn't really waiting fiddleford for the test of the device that fiddleford did built, and even knowing that the portal was dangerous fiddleford chose to come for the test

and then fiddleford got in the portal and it was the biggest traumatic event for him. it was the breaking point for him from which he couldn't stop using the memory gun. it damaged him so much, that he turned from that bright 30-y.o. man into the familiar to us old man mcgucket in the span of two years. his life was ruined for another 30 years, a half of his life he was a mad lonely guy who lived in the junkyard. the man who could've become someone like steve jobs but much better if only he didn't go to help stanford. his family could've been full, tate could have his father. the incident with the portal was the moment of no return for fiddleford, and what did stanford do?

when fiddleford got sucked in the portal, he thought only about the success of his work, that for fidds it was "a remarkable opportunity to confirm or deny the theory" (which he already did with his pre-test research). he didn't think that it was dangerous on the other side, that the portal wouldn't just disintegrate fidds on atoms. and when stanford saw him speaking in a non-human way, shaking and twitching in shock like fiddleford did after the gremoblin incident, ford decided it was nothing. when fiddleford warned him about the apocalypse because he was in the portal and saw it with his own eyes, ford, as always, didn't listen. he didn't just not care about fidds' condition — he diminished everything fiddleford was feeling and everything he witnessed only because it didn't fit in ford's believes which were based just on bill's words (and for stanford it's not something new to belittle things related to fiddleford. he wasn't taking fidds' dream of creating a portable computer seriously, believing that his weirdness theory was much more important)

and after this, stanford insults fiddleford and his family in the journal. he says that he doesn't regret their partnership (it's not really a partnership if stanford didn't count fiddleford as an equal) and friendship breaking up. "to think I considered him a friend!" I doubt he ever did. stanford doesn't know shit about being a good friend (or even a decent person) to someone who sacrificed everything for him. who did put his life aside to be with ford, who cared enough to stay despite stanford again and again putting him in danger, constantly waving him away and feeling no remorse for that. fiddleford was breaking himself for this guy, he canonically was going through "I am nobody to ford if I don't build stuff for him" (and in the end this is exactly what happened). fiddleford didn't tell ford most of his fears and concerns because he didn't want to bother him. fidds was constantly scared and kept in inside because he wanted to be a "better partner". "if I have an anxiety, I will pop anxiety pills", "I'm gonna get through this". and then he didn't

fiddleford was abused by stanford. he was to stanford that ford was to bill, in some ways even worse. it's fucking wild that fiddleford did forgive ford after 30 years of a neverending madness nightmare with his mind being destroyed so much as like it was the earth in the times of the dinosaurs after being hit by the meteorite. fiddleford had lost literally everything, he wasn't even himself for a half of his life and still fidds found the strength to forgive someone who is responsible for it and who used him with regular emotional neglect. and you know what? fuck this. ford would never forgive bill and fiddleford had every right to stay mad at stanford. ford needed to be stuck in the portal to get his head out of the ass and by that time there were only crumbs of someone who fiddleford once was

fiddauthor and billford both are about abuse and toxic relationships. it's up to you what you like to ship, but we need to acknowledge the fact that fiddauthor isn't some fluffy healthy thing where both are happy. fiddleford was never happy and stanford didn't care about fiddleford and his feelings. they made each other worse and ford ruined fidds' life. THIS is the real fiddauthor

[thesnakelord]

I thought of a hilarious idea for an Au while I was fist fighting a paragraph for UDaIO

so we know one of the side effects of bills possession is eye bleeding, but what if it was worse? like the constant damage to the veins and nerves are too much for Ford's body to repair and his eye starts to necrose and die. So instead of doing the sane thing and going to the hospital, he pulls out his eye and shoves that thing in a jar to deal with later.

You know, like any normal person would.

Anyhow, this unfortunately rapidly increases the speed of his mental breakdown. he can't look in the mirror without seeing yellow taunting him, bill keeps telling him how they match even more now that they're both one eyed freaks, and his field of vision has been cut in half so he can't tell if anything is coming from that side.

by the time he gets around to sending the postcard, Ford's about 78% more twitchy than he is in canon. mans is sat in a corner, crossbow in hand, head turned so his remaining eye can see everything and his blind side is protected. bills still told him that he sending someone to steal his eyes and now he's watching the door like it'll attack him at any second.

So when Stan shows up and knocks on the door any trigger discipline Ford had, has long since been violently defenestrated. As such the moment he opens the door, he shoots his brother in the eye.

The both of them stand there processing this for a beat, before the screaming starts. Stan because he has an ARROW in his EYEBALL, Ford because he is responsible for the aforementioned Eye Arrow. Fun times for all! Stan then passes out from shock/pressure on his brain and is dragged inside so his brother can practice his non-existent medical degree. Ford is, of course, freaking the hell out. This wasn't part of his plan, none of this was part of the plan!

The first thing he does is call Fiddleford, and is sent to voicemail, as Fidds is off doing cult shit. He tries this a few times, leaving increasingly panicked and pleading voicemails. The second thing he does is decide he has to deal with this himself, because he can't call an ambulance, bill could have gotten to anyone there.

So, let me paint the scene Stanley Pines gets the pleasure of waking up to. He's laying down on the floor of what he thinks is his brother's house, in a lot of pain and unable to see out of one of his eyes, and is treated to the sight (ha) of said brother standing over him with an eyeball shish kabob in his grasp.

Who is also missing an eye.

He comes to some conclusions that, while understandable, are wholly incorrect. This is when the screaming starts back up.

[rayyanishere1]

"Studying? Yeah, Totally."

A Short FiddleStan Oneshot

(Part of the Loser Ford AU, but isn't relevant to the lore whatsoever lmao)

One night, Ford announced that he'd be at the library for a couple of hours.

"Knock yourself out, Sixer."

Once he left, Stan and Fiddleford looked at each other.

"Wanna..?"

"You don't even have to ask."

Stan led Fiddleford to the couch with only one motive in mind.

Forcing him to watch trashy television! They spent good money on that TV, and by God, they were gonna use it.

"Ladies and Gents, welcome back to 'Your Guess Could Be Royally Wrong!' The show where you don't win prizes, but you don't get punished, either. I'm your host, Zain Squalus—"

Ah, yes, gameshows. The peak of entertainment.

"Is this really what you wanna watch?"

"It's either this, weird chick dramas, or the news."

Welp, can't argue with that.

Fiddleford tried many times to make a move; pretending to yawn to wrap his arm around Stan's shoulder, not very subtly inching his hand towards Stan's thigh. Hell, he tried to go in for a kiss at least 3 times!

Without fail, something would make Stan dodge his advances. Oh, he suddenly has to shift a little in the opposite direction to grab something, oh, something shocking happened and he needed his whole body to react to it.

Seems fate was planning on cockblocking Fiddleford today. Not cool, man. Not cool.

During a commercial break, Stan left to get some snacks. That gave Fiddleford some time to think.

It was obvious that subtlety was getting him absolutely nowhere. He just had to be a little more direct, right? Yeah, that's definitely it.

Stan returned with a bowl of chips and sat back down. Now was time for Fiddleford's master plan.

He used every tactic he knew all at once. Wrapping an arm around Stan's shoulder, leaning in closer. Maybe he should also try getting Stan's mind off of this weird gameshow he was so invested in...

"You know, Stanley, we're home alone."

"I would hope so, yeah."

"And we aren't doing anything."

"Yes, we are! We're watching Your Guess Could Be Royally Wrong, the totally original gameshow based in Oregon."

"I just thought that, with Stanford gone, we'd be doing something else."

"...I don't follow."

That's Stan Pines for you, folks. The dumbest genius on Earth.

"Stanley..."

Fiddleford didn't know if he wanted to laugh, cry, or scream. Instead, he decided that his plan of being direct was the right way to go.

"Stanley Pines."

"That's my name. Am I in trouble?"

"You're going to be if you don't kiss me right now."

"Haha, what?"

∆∆∆

The TV buzzed on in the background as they practically devoured each other's faces.

"Fidds, if you were this—hah—pent up, you could've just told me.."

"I tried to! For an entire hour!"

"Wait, really?"

"Lord, yes! I suppose something was keeping you from noticing."

"Uh huh.."

Deeming the couch to be too uncomfortable, Fiddleford took it upon himself to bring them somewhere more suitable for their.. Activity.

He picked Stan up like he weighed nothing and carried him to the bedroom.

Many kisses later, the two were shirtless and all over each other. It was like they were trying to fit multiple days worth of making out into one session. To be fair, though, it wasn't often that they had alone time like this.

Stan pulled away for a moment, much to Fiddleford's dismay.

"Ford's been out later than usual. He could come back any minute..."

Just as he said that, they heard the front door open.

Oh, God.

They rushed to put something on, not bothering to check what they had grabbed. If Ford saw them like this, in their shared space, Lord knows they'd never hear the end of it.

"Wait, are you wearing my—"

Too late to change now!

A few lazy knocks came from the door before Ford went in. He didn't even look at them, he just dropped his bag on the floor and flopped face first onto his bed.

Stan sighed in relief. It was a good thing that Ford was so tir—

"Wait."

The couple tensed up, expecting to get berated for their "inappropriate behaviour." Instead, Ford just took his glasses off and put them on his side table before promptly passing back out.

That was close...