#some people need their sanity
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maximura · 21 days ago
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royalarchivist · 28 days ago
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Bad: I don’t think people understand the effect QSMP had on some of the streamers in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. [...] Imagine that you were given a friend to play Minecraft with — like your best friend — BUT if this person dies, if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Can you imagine what that’s like?
Bad: If you did not live through the QSMP, if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience the Eggs were. They were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with.
Bad: I’m not saying I regret it. To this day, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again. [...] I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, it was just that fun.
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Earlier today during his stream, Bad shared his experience and thoughts about the Eggs and the significant emotional (and traumatic) impact they had on him and his fellow QSMP members.
This clip a very edited-down version since his commentary was ~13 minutes long, so I highly recommend checking out Bad's VOD if you have the time. (Timestamp: 47:36 - 1:00:14)
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
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Bad: To be fair Chat, I really think the QSMP... I don't think anyone really can relate to it, Chat. It's something that's so... I've told people this before, like– but it's hard to understand. Right? Like...
Where was I? Sorry Chat, I'm losing my train of thought. Look, let me explain Chat– here's the dealio, ok? Here's the dealio, and this is what I mean when I say like, it's important to keep this in mind, Chat. Ok? It's important to keep this in mind:
I don’t think people understand the effect that the QSMP had on like, some of the streamers, in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. This is the analogy I’ve given to every person who I’ve like, shared this with. Imagine you meet somebody– [He hears a strange noise] What the fudge was that? Did you hear that?
Anyway– Chip! The story I was just relaying to Chat, Chip, was this: I was sharing this story with them, I said–  I was giving them an analogy. 
Imagine Chat, for example, imagine that you were… playing Minecraft, with like– you were given a friend to play Minecraft with, Chat, like your best friend, and [unintelligible] were like, “Hey, you get to play Minecraft with this person, right? BUT if this person dies – they’re currently your best friend, Chip – but if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Ever again.” Can you imagine what that’s like, Chip?
I don’t think a lot of people understand like, what that does, right? I’m not gonna say that like, it creates this situation, Chip, that like, messes with your head, but it– Chip – but it totally, totally does, Chip. It messes with your head! It literally puts you in a position where you’re second-guessing and thinking about everything, Chip! You’re thinking about EVERYTHING Chip! Ok? And that’s the problem, Chip– is you turn into a paranoid monster because of it, Chip! Like, you don’t understand Chip– I was- I was so afraid of every dirt block, I used to carry a shovel with me Chip, and I would specifically right-click dirt blocks that looked suspicious because mines, Chip– mines could not be shoveled! Like, I was crazy, Chip! But here’s the problem, Chip: that craziness is still there. I’m genuinely like–
I remember thinking Chip, that I would one day– I was like, “I’m going to move past–” here, let’s go up here, Chip. I remember thinking one day Chip, I was like, “I’m gonna move past the underground base, one of these days. You know, one of these days, I feel like I’ll be able to grow and achieve the desire to build a base that doesn’t have to be underground.” But I don’t think it’s possible now Chip, because I think… I just don’t know. I feel like the paranoia– there’s still like, residual leftover trauma from that situation, Chip.
But here’s the problem Chip: I don’t think I don’t think– I don’t think people understand it. Like, I just really don’t. But I also don’t blame them Chip, ‘cuz I don’t think it’s possible to fully understand it if you haven’t lived through it. Like, if you did not live through the QSMP… I’m talking about the QSMP, I don’t- I don’t know if that was obvious– if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience like, the Eggs were. Right? I don’t think people realize it. Like, they were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with, Chip. So, it’s just one of those things that–
[He’s interrupted by a loud rumble of thunder above them]
Did lightning just strike here? Is it thunderstorming out…? But anyway, Chip. That’s the food for thought.
But that’s the problem– Like, every time it rains in Minecraft, I have to like, look at the sky, and I get this weird, like, second--hand vibe because of the trauma. The trauma, Chip! The trauma is real! But that’s the point– I’m not saying I regret it. I, to this day Chip, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again. 
[He falls down] Dangit, don’t come over here Chip, ‘cuz I’m coming back up! Ok.
I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering  and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, Chip, it was just that fun. I really wi– I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible, Chip, to give people that same energy, like that same experience. You know what I mean, Chip? I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible again. Like, EVER.
Because… because like, one: I will say on one level Chip, I will say on one level, like– it’s sort of emotionally like… It’s emotionally devastating, and I think to actually go through that– and this is where like, if I ever do end up going to a– see a therapist, if I ever do end up going to see a therapist at any point, I’ll talk it over with them and be like, “Hey, what do you think about this?” Because I genuinely think on one level, like– it’s created this fear of forming attachments because of like, how things can go. You know what I mean? Like, the fear of getting attached to something and then potentially losing it. Like, it’s- it’s a genuine thing. I think people forget about that.
Like, at the end of the day, everything was RP, right? On the server. You know what I mean? Like, everything was RP, Chip. BUT at the same point, even though it was RP Chip, it was still like– there the reality of you were still playing like, with another person, and you were still getting that experience, and it felt like you were genuinely attached to someone and you didn’t want anything bad to happen to them. It was GENUINELY stressful, Chip.
But at the same point, I don’t regret it, and I don’t think it was a bad experience. I’m– 
Sometimes in life Chip, you go through stuff, and maybe you have a certain amount of like, things that like, can happen, that you’re like, “You know what, maybe this wasn’t a good thing that this happened,” but at the same point, you still aren’t necessarily upset about it, because… it’s like growing as a person, right? Here’s the thing Chip; even bad situations, Chip, can lead to an overall good outcome. Like–
Even if you’re going through something bad Chip, just because a bad thing happens doesn’t mean that only bad things have to come from that. That’s one of the things I tell people all the time, Chip, is that if you go through a bad situation, you can learn from it, and you can use your experience to help others. And you can be that– you can be, at the worst-case scenario, you can be someone for other people who are going through that same experience to lean on when they go through that.I think there’s a certain amount of comfort that comes from that; from knowing no matter how bad your situation is, you’re not the only person who’s experienced it. You know what I mean?
#Badboyhalo#BBH#Bad#QSMP#January 8 2025#Edited#I know folks are going to add their two cents on this subject in the tags / comments / replies (and as always you're welcome to do that)#But for the sake of my sanity please don't be an asshole to any of the CCs / ex-admins / fellow fans / anyone else. Thanks#Most folks here don't need a ''Don't be a dumbass'' reminder but I had to block someone for that earlier and it was a bit disappointing#This is going to be a Tumblr exclusive clip because I don't trust Twitter to have common sense or common decency about this topic#Tumblr exclusive#Anyways business aside – that black line on the side is just part of Bad's stream btw. He just Has That#Took too long for this to render otherwise I'd edit it out because it's annoying#I'm just realizing this screenshot doesn't even have Dapper OTL but it's the best one I have so I gotta work with what I got#Honestly; I still miss QSMP dearly... I love the core intent of the project and the multicultural exchange#I love all the language barriers that were broken and I loved all the stories that were told and watching beautiful friendships bloom#But I am still so angry and disappointed about how things ended and all the poor communication and the admin situation as a whole#It's a complicated feeling#I agree with pretty much everything Bad says here#It's ironic that he uses that analogy because I've said almost the exact same thing when explaining why losing any Egg was so devastating#We weren't just mourning for the characters. We were mourning for the admins too#I'll never forget that last stream with Tazercraft and Richas; and Pac ending stream in tears#I wish they'd done away with the Egg life system. I wish they'd done a lot of things differently#If the project ever does come back in some shape or form I hope they are more transparent about things and have better communication#I dunno how I'd feel personally. They would have to do a lot of work regaining people's trust#And frankly I don't think they'll ever regain that trust from a large portion of the community#I remember near the start of QSMP I saw a comment from a fan that simply said ''QSMP; please don't leave me feeling bitter''#I think about that comment a lot
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year ago
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I love you smile lines and worry lines and grey and white hair and wrinkles and purple spiderweb veins and the process of aging and living in a body that is standing the test of times. I love you experiences that make you wiser and stories that make you laugh, and every little process that happens to get to the point where you have so many memories because you have the fortune to be here and be so radiant
#positivity#pro aging#also i hate you 'anti aging' scams that capitalize on fear of aging. death by 1000000 papercuts for ye#saw a hair video where they restored the salt-and-pepper colour in an older clients hair and it looked SO GOOD at the end#i love when people throw in the towel and embrace their aging however that looks#it isn't productive to shame people who are ashamed of aging and i just want to. celebrate aging#in a world that simultaneously venerates youth and adulthood and hates BOTH you need to find some sense of freedom#as a Young Adult(tm) please please PLEASE older folks seeing this/following me know that i look up to you#older folks i need you to know that your worth NEVER diminished when you added a new number on your birthday cake#and your body and mind and soul NEVER lost worth because it started to creak a little at the joints#and i might be wrong about this because i'm still young but it can be SO tempted to miss your youth when you feel like...#...you've somehow LOST part of yourself by growing older. and so much of aging is about change and some things don't stay the same...#...and that IS scary and i will never once fault somebody for that. but please don't fall into the trap that because you've aged that...#...you somehow have forever lost fundamental pieces of Who You Are and you could never come back from that...#...for your own sake and sanity you deserve to find comfort and solice and understanding in who you still are...#...because you are still - at the core - the same. you can never take this away from yourself#and i know this might ring hollow because i just don't get what it's like to be older#but i have looked at my elders and felt awe at their age and their experiences#and i know what that is like and it's awesome. i just wish more older people knew that so many of us look at you with awe...#...and - if you can believe it - some of us ENVY your age or experiences or even body#i'm watching an 'older' content creator (older by internet standards 🙄) and i envy him for how eventful his life was#i envy that he experienced a different world - one that i have only heard about from my dad because i was too young to remember it#and i admire this person for their wisdom and thoughts because they've come from his experiences living in a Different World#it's that type of stuff that makes me unafraid to keep on living#inspired by following somebody like. twice my age posting about their excitement abiut growing older and !!!!!!! YEAHHHHHH#didn't realize they were closer to my dad's age but that's so cool???????????
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iknowicanbutwhy · 9 months ago
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Puyo/Madou, meet ISAT. ISAT, meet Puyo/Madou. I'm sure you have everything in common and this is not at all a completely random crossover of my two current interests
#dont look at Salde for rhe love of my sanity do not even percieve Salde i dint kwno what ifmf doing g#art#fanart#ISAT#puyo puyo#in stars and time#madou monogatari#kitscribbles#sig puyo puyo#schezo wegey#arle nadja#ringo ando#sig really do be sig no last name#prince salde#their ages are different in this one. oldest to youngest - schezo > arle > sig > ringo > salde#you see that stubble on Sig thats baby stubble. thats unfortunate facial hair on a teenager#sometimes it works out for people still in their teens but not sig#Ringo is!! Perhaps a bit too young to travel!! She's basically a foreign exchange student#i have to admit all the roles and dynamics in ISAT are NOT 1:1 in this AU#i have it all mixed up#when i say sig and schezo are besties i mean theyre both awkward with people they just happen to have an understanding. also sig bullies hi#Sig is he/they here!! I dont usually mess with canon genders (hella respect those who do) but honestly i just like it for Sig...#I still need to learn more about Salde but imma just go ahead and say that Salde is kid gender#Was tempted to hide Sig's lil hair thingies under his hat but then was like. Why would i do that#favorite joke in all this is that Schezo tried so hard to Change that he fucked up his own speech patterns and now socializing is. well#sig didnt shave before the loops and now he has to do that every time or suffer the teasing of his friends at some point in the house#thanks guys im going insane over here and youre laughing. going nonverbal now#How does Salde balance a fish on their head? uhhhhh well you see. have you ever balanced a massive bag of frozen peas#Salde doesnt cook but there's money in that fish. Nobody feels comfortable enough to ask a kid for cash but they WILL reward good behavior#in puyos and time
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skunkes · 3 months ago
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biggest downside of not having many experiences or meeting many people is not having anything to feed into the art machine
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chirpsythismorning · 6 months ago
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Nick himself said that his knowledge is confined to the leaks prior to s4, the s4 scripts from his verified source (likely within a source) and basic knowledge most fans paying attention have been able to formulate about s5 based on what has been released officially/unofficially, trends from Netflix and common sense.
He is saying based on all that, he doesn’t think byler is happening. 
And if we think back to what the Duffers themselves shared in the 4x09 script, it literally implies Mike’s monologue worked, and that it was entirely genuine. This tells me that the script the Duffers released for Emmy consideration, is not that far off from what Nick saw for himself. 
I think it’s likely Nick got something that the average below the line worker might manage to get their hands on if they tried hard enough. A copy they know they have to water-down to prevent these very situations from happening.
Unfortunately for the Duffers, it just so happens that they didn’t scrub their watered down copy hard enough.
Unfortunately for Nick, he admitted that it’s possible and even likely that the production will release things that aren’t exactly accurate with the sole purpose to lead fans sleuthing astray, without realizing it may have ironically already happened to him. 
#byler#stranger things#8flix#it would take an eternity to cover everything about scriptgate properly#there are just so many aspects of it that are unknown or are known but just not thoroughly understood bc 8flix has existed for some time#even prior to that fateful dry summer back in 2022#and including scripts beyond just st which made 8flix seen as a reputable source for scripts across the board#personally i've found myself back and forth on it#was nick sus for telling fans a script was dropping hour by hour and then going radio silent for days only to not release a script at all?#yes (and all while using the loophole argument that technically people donated to 8flix and got a complementary script with that donation)#were the st writers fishy for saying they'd release a script for a scene but would then need at least 2 business days to post each one?#also yes#are we really doubting that they have secrets in their scripts that they have to remove/shift a bit for the generic all-access version?#if so.. why?#I think very few people see the version of the script that the duffers have#shawn likely has it plus his own notes with it bc he also contributes ideas and runs it by the bros for his episodes and more bc he's an EP#maybe other key-players with that sort of control over the production could have more honest scripts i.e. the writers room#outside of that you have the main cast who MIGHT get those scripts + additional notes on their characters as discussed separately one on on#but beyond that scripts are meant to be vague#it's supposed to be 1 minute of screentime = 1 page of script#quite frankly multiple versions of the scripts exist and we're getting the barest of them all... minus a few slips here and there...#I could go on forever but i wont for my sanity bc the reality is we don't know for sure what happened and we probably never will#i'm more interested in seeing how this all pans out#nick has come out for vindication at least once this summer and last summer since 2022#i'm getting hefty slap on the wrist vibes here which if anything just makes this all so much more insane bc i mean... the implications?...#is it giving bad blood? is it giving enemies to lovers?#maybe nick will give us more vague hints when the next dry summer rolls around
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frenchfry99 · 7 months ago
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"Summer weather is at it's most! Get yourself a cold drink and keep your hats on, darlings! >BD 🌞🔥"
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Zoom in for quality!
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Bonus (real late) pride month thing I made of Daria and Sean! Lovebirds? Lovebugs? We've got one of each I dunno
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Cropped vers cuz yeah!
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chaos-bringer-13 · 5 months ago
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My brain just hit an old hyperfixation (is this what it's called? I hope I used the word right) and oh dear am I losing my mind now. I need to write a story I think. About this one old guy. He's unhinged. There's so much information about him and yet not enough. I want to explore his character so much. He's definitely a criminal - at least he was one - and I'm 95% sure he can do actual real magic, and he's a musician and an artist and an actor and a magician and a philosopher and a traveler and a conman and so much more and also I think he's some kind of immortal. Maybe he just has a VERY long life. It's strongly implied he was a pirate at some point of his life. He started a cult by accident several times. My conspiracy theories about him include him being a secret god.
He's also a freaking round blue raven. Someone save me from my mind.
#seriously why is he so cool#he's like. a ball.#he's ROUND#if no one stops me I'm gonna make an au and introduce all my mutuals to a russian cartoon that lives in my head rent-free#it has an obviously mysterious old man and an old woman who seems to be very normal but actually has some weird past as well#and they're in love you can fight me on this THEY. ARE. IN LOVE.#there's a disastrous scientist who keeps forgetting to sleep and is kinda cute in a nerdy way#there's a mechanic guy who lives a bit away from everyone surrounded by tech and he's actually unhinged#he's a single father btw. he made a robot baby because he was lonely. it's very important for his character.#I WILL ship the scientist and the mechanic because no one can stop me <3#there's a local farmer who was a famous disco dancer an archeologist and a VERY famous actor in the past. he doesn't care about it anymore.#he was like. Captain America actor kind of famous. or Superman.#and then he just committed a bunch of crimes for his new friends and left to live in a village far away from big cities#all those people with very suspicious past raise a bunch of children together#absolutely inseparable adhd and autism best friends boys who I think are capable of destroying the world#and toxic teenagers couple:#a girl who honestly needs to figure herself out first before dating anyone and a poet boy who is SO deeply in love with her it's not okay#the farmer dude also has a rebellious teenager niece who visits him sometimes#and the mechanic's kid is usually in space but sometimes returns and I am not ashamed to admit that I cried during some of those episodes#I am going to think about them. they are so important to me.#I am going insane.#also yes they are all round animals. if you're wondering.#someone just tranquillise me already or something. it's 5 a.m. and I am losing my sanity
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valkyurii · 3 months ago
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it’s funny how things have gone full circle with malenia. she was so hated when the game first came out, but then people grew to like her. then the dlc came out and now people hate her again lmao
#i mean it’s hardly surprising given what we now know#she did all that awful shit and wasn’t even charmed#like i see people talk about how stupid miquella is because of this plan to essentially trap radahn#but that also makes malenia look stupid af too#‘go to caelid and kill radahn so i can marry him’ ans she was like sure#miquella wanted the one guy in the lands between who loves war and fighting to be his consort for his age of peace and compassion…#what a genius he is.#makes me wonder why he even needs some heavy weight to keep order for him when he can just charm people into submission#was radahn just there as a ceremonial position?#oh wait i forgot miquella thinks he’s super kind so that’s why he wants him#miq learnt about the gravity magic horse thing and swooned#honestly still can’t get over how incredibly stupid the twins look after the dlc#i think people like to imagine malenia was charmed just because it makes it all look slightly better on her part#like they are just making excuses for her#but holy shit the fact she was all but willing to fucking die so miquella could bag radahn..#what a thing to die for lmao#and he was apparently present after the battle? but didn’t do anything to help either radahn nor malenia?#instead he was helping a random redmane?#he obviously knew malenia had bloomed but ultimately didn’t care i guess#kind of like ‘oh well if she’s still alive when I get back i’ll deal with it then’#honestly wish miquella had just died in that cocoon at this point#tbh he doesn’t really do much in the dlc anyway they could have made it more about messmer and marika#hell bring melina into it please that would have been more interesting at this point#we didn’t need the dubcon incest plot micheal you could have left that one in the drafts#i gotta get this out of my head it’s driving me nuts#seriously need to move on from this game for my own sanity
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melmedardasworld · 2 months ago
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Can't stand some of ya'll crosstaggers and take your weird takes seriously...
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chipped-chimera · 9 months ago
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What I love about Tumblr is being able to curate your online experience.
What I DON'T love about being online in general (as this is not exclusive to Tumblr) is the presumption that as long as anyone has even a mildly popular account/platform is that they have to know and be on the ball making statements about every current issue under the fucking sun or they're somehow the devil.
Yes this is about Palestine. Look I am on the side of Palestine here but sometimes you just wanna go to your little space on the internet to catch a fucking break, not have people blasting an air horn in your ears every minute because you're not constantly talking about 'current issue'. And I shouldn't have to lead with 'I support Palestine' to say that without fear of getting fucking blasted.
If you're any kind of person who thinks it's okay to call for, encourage or participate in bullying people online for curating their own spaces, claiming they're being 'silent' on an issue just because they haven't said anything specific about it - fuck you, you're an asshole. Get off my blog.
It's people like you who are driving compassion fatigue. You're literally making things worse. You actually want to do something constructive? Get the hell off the internet, stop harassing people and actively DO something constructive. If you cannot do that due to personal restrictions, find another way to do something constructive online that ISN'T harassing people. Because harassing people doesn't do SHIT.
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mcalhenwrites · 2 months ago
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For every time that someone interacts with one of my crochet posts but has ignored all the reblogs on my writing, I'm going to write about 100 words and post them on social media. (Or write more than that and post less than I wrote.) Here's what I wrote just now: "Still, Sophie is a darling. Despite her weather-related affinities, that little girl shines in a household of people who succeeded in snuffing the sunshine out of a little boy with golden hair and bright green eyes." - from Cold ch 2, a Seasons side story
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musical-chick-13 · 2 months ago
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:) :) :) :) :)
#if anyone. ANYONE. even people who condemn Vigilante Justice and talk about [xyz thing that was apparently wrong with him]#straight-up openly thirsts over the shooter and talks about how hot they think he is on a personal preference level#I am blocking you and never speaking to you again.#is this petty? yeah probably. almost definitely.#but I've earned the right to be petty after seeing all these fuck-ass awful takes on literally every subject imaginable#we NEED to put more '''''ugly''''' people in public positions this is actually IMPERATIVE#the fucking leeway you will give ANY white man who you think is attractive jesus FUCKING christ#it doesn't matter!!!! how you look is a morally neutral thing!!!!!!! most people are not '''''hot''''' actually!!!!!!!!!!!!!#get a hobby!!!!! worry about something actually meaningful for once!!!!!!!!!!!#find a fictional character who's horrible instead!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#oh I forgot. we can't like horrible fictional constructs for any reason that's bad. we can stan literally anyone irl though.#murderers. fundamentalists. abusers. dictators. the guy formerly known as bren------s.#THAT'S all fine.#I can't believe I'm going to say this. I hate this phrase and I think more often than not it is used in very bad faith but: SOOOOOO many of#you for real need to go out and touch grass#like for your own self-preservation#and for the sanity of the rest of us#current events#tw: guns#my God I have blocked and unfollowed more people in the past month than like. the entirety of my almost-eight-years here probably#UGH. good-BYE#(once again asking myself if I should legit just deactivate but I would lose touch with a few people and also access to some of my#beloved fandom communities)
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iridescentis · 3 months ago
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helloooo i am alive ish is anyone else aliveeee broooo
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alligaytorswamp · 3 months ago
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fighting violent urges to write heated msgs all because i saw yet another cringe opinions coming from some local fools 🤕
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clementimetodie · 1 year ago
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