#some of these characters are severely underrated and I think us artists should make it a point to draw the starcanpulpwrecked women more

[ricky-mortis]

Starcanpulpwrecked women doodles

[xxxhellfireravenxxx]

Thanks for the tags @maybirdie and @nerd-artist

1. ride or die ship (your otp): Big surprise it's ereloy! I have never been so focused on a ship before and I am not mad about it at all.

2. most annoying ship: I am not a drama-llama, I really don't have beef with other ships, this is what the fandom is for. We should all be free to ship our ships without others putting us down!

3. second favourite ship: I have several, I fully blame two-minutes for getting me into Kotallo/Talanah! Big fan of Zo/Varl, Morlund/Abadund and Avad/Ersa I also ship Abadund/Clipboard lmao

4. favourite platonic relationship: I love the relationships that Beta forms during Forbidden West, I really hope she is a bigger part of Horizon 3. Each of the gang teaches her life skills and how to navigate the world.

5. underrated ship: I don't have an answer for this one!

6. overrated ship: No drama-llama here!

7. one thing i would change in canon: I would love to have seen more of Ersa, the comics were amazing but I'd love a game set during the Liberation, learning more of Erend and Ersa's story with Dervahl.

8. something canon did right: I played HZD on a whim, my brother mentioned it to me as he thought I would enjoy it. I was so confused while I played. What happened to the old world? Why had humanity gone back to a tribal existence and what did the machines have to do with things? I was completely hooked, gripping story and lovable characters mixed with a thrilling story. Perfect.

9. a thing i'm proud of creating for the fandom: I don't particularly think I've created anything spectacular for the fandom, I'm just a hobby artist who enjoys drawing these two idiots! There are so many fantastic creators that I love screaming about.

10. a character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): Erend. He's been my favourite character since the very beginning. He's a lovable goof with a cheeky smile and I am very blessed to have the tasset glitch to enjoy and share with my friends!

11. the character i relate to the most and why: I don't relate to any one character specifically, I see a bit of myself in Petra, Talanah and Aloy. I'm very strong-willed with a sarcastic sense of humor and a dirty mind!

12. character(-s) i hate the most and why: I have a list of characters I want to shoot in the ass with an arrow, these include Sylens, Tilda, Dervahl, Helis, Vuadis and Nil. Among many others.

13. something i've learned from the fandom: I joined the fandom back in June 2022, I finally felt confident enough to post a AU ereloy fic on AO3. What followed was an invite to join the Two Minutes discord server and meet some fantastic and extremely talented folk! I've learned to be more confident in myself and my artwork, having that feedback has helped me improve and its wonderful to be able to scream about my favourite blorbos!

14. three tags i seek out on ao3: All the sex. Sensual Fingerblasting, Sexual Tension and Explicit Sexual Content.

15. a song i strongly associate with my otp/favourite character: Hear Me Now by Bad Wolves ft Diamante. It makes me think of Erend struggling with drink and his grief after Ersa passed, Aloy arriving in Meridian and bringing him out of himself. There is a very strong undertone in this song of the whole 'friends to lovers' which is one of my favourite tropes, especially with ereloy.

tagging: No pressure tags!! Sorry for repeats! @maybirdie @sorbetowl @chib95 @littlelionpaw @hothotpot

[flowers-for-flamingos]

Dear animation companies,

If you aren’t going to go all out like the toa crew did and animate your 3D shows with as much love as was given to Trollhunters and 3 Below and soon Wizards, than don’t even bother!

Instead, make them 2D animation because I can’t tell you how much better it would look. I don’t UNDERSTAND! 2D is my favorite because you can do so much more with it than you can with 3D animation.

Now don’t get me wrong, I love 3D animation and I’m not saying that I don’t like when it’s used. The whole ToA series is some of my favorite animation of all time! I’ve raved about how much this show has done for being a television show with movie level animation so many times and, honestly, probably will never stop. But a lot of 3D animated shows should have considered making their poorly animated 3D into well developed 2D. (Cough—miraculous ladybug—cough) I’m saying that 2D animation is criminally underrated. And as someone who wants to become an animation artist it makes me horribly sad when people’s work goes unnoticed.

Have you noticed that when companies make 2D animated shows that they aren’t shown or advertised as much as their others and I don’t understand why!

Let me give you 2 examples that I have watched thoroughly and meticulously.

Tangled: The series is a 2D animated show that continues Rapunzel’s adventures after finally reuniting with her parents. They even got the original voice actors back in the game! This show is AMAZING and if you haven’t watched it already I suggest you do. It delves into the lore of the sundrop flower and Gothel’s history.

This show got bad advertising and even worse time slots, almost like Disney was trying to get it to fail and I DON’T KNOW WHY! The animation is stunning and smoothly drawn and gets better throughout the seasons (even though people sometimes think that 2D animation can’t improve) and you get loads of Eugene Fitzherbert scenes! All of season 2 has pretty much a new scene almost every episode, and the characters are drawn with such detail and care! Why would you put it in the background?

Another 2D animated show that is so underrated (and sometimes severally hated) Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! This show has some of the best and some of my most favorite 2D animation by far. If you haven’t even heard of this I wouldn’t be surprised. It doesn’t get a lot of advertising. It’s a different take on the tale of TMNT but I love that about it. It’s more lighthearted to match the 2D animation! But it’s got the same dark plots as previous TMNT! But all these turtles have gen z humor and are the most sarcastic of the group and maybe it’s just me but I latch onto those characters and instantly love them.

Like this GIF doesn’t even BEGIN to do this show justice. The opening sequence is one big long continuous shot! It’s GORGEOUS!

The fight scenes are something else entirely. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve backed up episodes to rewatch 10 seconds of action because it’s so beautiful! From the character design to the coloring this show is at the top of my fav 2D animation list. Even stuff happening behind or in the background is animated so beautifully and smoothly! Like Mikey rocking on a playground horse behind everyone else! I could go in and on about this (and I might in a later post) but I think you get it for now!

This rant was supposed to be short (they always start that way) but it turned out to be incredibly long so my bad, but please go watch all of the shows I just listed here because they deserve attention! And rottmnt might not survive sooooo......

Thank you :)

[saintgale]

I’m just. Venting a little about stupid art things.

It’s super frustrating to me when popular artists complain constantly about not getting enough views/likes/engagement/whatever on their art. Like, I get it. Especially once I guess someone has gotten used to a certain amount of interaction, be that likes or comments or whatever, but here I am still bitterly happy if I can get like. 10 likes on an art post. (Which, thank you so much to those of you who do, it’s like each and every one is a little smile that lights up my day, and I appreciate it very much.) Here and there I will get one that “blows up” to me (these are fanart posts, and I’m only talking like, a few hundred notes, which for me is a mindblowing amount), but it’s disheartening and discouraging when I put so much time, so much into making art and there’s nothing to show for it.

I know I shouldn’t, and I do not, make art to get engagement on my posts, and I have long ago given up the “gauging my self worth on how much interaction I get,” even though that mindset is STILL lodged into me (”you don’t get engagement on your artwork because your artwork is bad”), that I am not good enough, that I will never be good enough, that my art sucks. At the end of the day I’m drawing things like my characters because they make me happy, but damn if it wouldn’t be nice to be at a place, like those popular artists, who constantly have people asking about their ocs and reblogging their oc art and all that. I know it’s not going to happen to me, and that’s okay. But when I see people with like, consistently hundreds or thousands of interactions on their content, who have thousands of followers, and then are like “I’m underrated” and all that, it’s like, then what does that make the rest of us “invisible” artists?

I will make a small disclaimer up front that I’m not upset at their success (if anything I’m happy for it), it’s not anything like that, it’s more frustration at myself as to why I can’t reach that, and frustration that the consumer media culture has made it so that nothing is ever “enough.” (And I get that wanting to still grow and improve is perfectly valid.) But the whole phenomenon of making someone who has tens of thousands of followers and constant interaction with their content feel as if that still isn’t “enough” is really awful, for them and for everyone else who can’t “make it” like that.

And look. I know my art’s not “great.” It’s certainly not “professional” quality or anything like that, and I constantly struggle to find what I like about it or to just refrain from putting myself down about it. And part of the reason is the shit like this, the feeling that “no one likes it” and that it’s “not good enough” to get interaction or commissions. And I know, I know deep down that’s not true, that on the technical side I am the same skill level as some of these more popular people, then I think, well there must be something wrong with what I’m doing or something wrong with me.

It’s like. You pour your heart and soul out into trying to make things and trying to improve and you throw it out there and it just sits there. And rots.

It just kills you inside. And yes, there’s that stubborn part of me that persists and will always persist, that I make art for me, I make art because I like to, I do not make art to measure my self-worth or my success, I do not make art to try to beg for interaction, I make art because it makes me happy. But at the end of it all, it’s still a slap in the face. It still hurts, you know?

Especially when you try, and you’ve been trying for years, and it’s never amounted to anything. Years, and there must be something wrong with me, because I’m still stuck here, in the same place, I think with even less interaction than I used to get (I think that’s just because some people have moved on, and some people just left bc of the whole tumblr bullshit thing, which is totally understandable and okay), but what do you do after that? There’s no hope left, really. It’s just the feeling that you’re going to be a nobody forever, that no one cares, no one will care, that your art will always suck, and there’s nothing you can do about it no matter how hard you try. (So why try anymore?)

Also another thing I’m just salty and bitter about that’s somewhat related: not being able to sell commissions when I see popular artists around similar skill levels charging even more than x2 my prices for some things and getting commissions constantly/people asking about them constantly. (Which I know of course doesn’t mean people will buy in that second scenario, but it’s still so frustrating.) This goes also to adopts, which I don’t do and don’t buy (no money even if I wanted to lol), but I see the “popular” designs go for several times the amount of designs with similar detail and all that, the only difference being they’re done by smaller artists. Which, yeah, I also know right now the whole world is fucked and we’re all trying to just scrape by and keep ourselves afloat. And buying art is a luxury, I know that and I think artists absolutely should be charging more for their work. It is just, again, frustrating and disheartening, that I can’t even make a decent living wage on things even when I do sell. (And, again, then it just goes back to the stupid little voice in my head that goes, “Dratz, your art isn’t worth that. No one wants to pay that much for your bad art.” And I know that’s all bs but it still stings and persists.)

Which, again, thank you from the bottom of my heart to those who do commission me. I appreciate you all and love drawing for you!

I really hope this doesn’t come off as me being ungrateful for all that I do have--I am very humbled and of course immensely thankful. Sorry I’m just not good at articulating my thoughts and feelings.

[lovemesomesurveys]

[zombiebandido]

Can you recommend any Neil Gaiman to me, aside from Stardust or Good Omens? I’m not familiar with his work.

What's the best concert you've been to, if you've been? Jonas Brothers and Green Day.

What's the funniest screenname you've ever seen? I’ve been on the internet since I was like 9 years old, I’ve come across many.

Is there an animal you like that most people don't? I don’t think so. Most people don’t seem to dislike giraffes, which are my favorite animal. <<< Same. And doggos.

Is there an animal that you think is overrated in terms of how it's liked? No.

Is there a time period you think is underrated? I’d love to bring the 90′s back, that’s all. <<< I’m in.

What about music? Hmm.

Do you find yourself listening to music that's a bit more esoteric? No.

What are your three favorite books and why? I’m gonna give you my three current favorite artists instead: AJ Rivers, Willow Rose, and Mary Stone. They’re murder mystery and psychological thriller authors with tons of books and I’ve really enjoyed the many I’ve read from each of them.

What about authors? ^^^ Do you have any likes you wouldn't tell someone until you got to know them? Hmm. I think things would just come up over time, not because I’m waiting to tell them.

Do you have a favorite language? Spanish.

What about a place you've always wanted to visit? I’d love to be able to travel all over.

What's something someone does or says that just makes you laugh? Tell me a lame dad joke. I’m a sucker for those. <<< lol I am, too. I came across a compilation post recently on here that was pretty great.

Do goldfish crackers ever make you sick, or is that just me? I’ve never had that issue.

Do you have a favorite art style? No.

Do you have a favorite myth/fairy-tale? There’s several I find interesting and enjoy.

Who is your favorite person aside from family? Alexander Skarsgard. ;)

Do any of your pets (if you have them) have weird quirks? My doggo is very quirky. She’s such a goofball.

Do you listen to music from anywhere besides America? Some.

Have you ever "quit" a site and came back to it more than once? I don’t think so.

Do you have an "odd" fascination with anything? Hm. I don’t think I have any “odd” fascinations. 

What is the thing you want most at this moment? I’d really like to just feel decent today so I can enjoy a nice Easter with my family.

What was the last book you read and what was it about? I’m currently reading, “Cold Highway” by Mary Stone, which is the 4th book in a series.

What was the worst book you've ever read & why? I can’t believe I ever read the Fifty Shades of Gray books. *facepalm*

Do you have a favorite breed of dog or cat? Which? Labs and German Shepherds are awesome.

If you like any anime/manga, what are some titles you recommend? --

What do you think about school in general? I think it’s important to get an education. <<<

What's the hardest thing you've been through, & what did you learn from it? The accident that made me a paraplegic and everything that resulted from it ever since.

What are three "unrealistic" things you want most? Good health is the most unrealistic. 

What are some of your favorite foods? Ramen, garlic parm and lemon pepper boneless wings from Wingstop, and scrambled eggs and biscuits smothered in country gravy.

Where do you like to buy your clothes? Boxlunch and Hot Topic. 

Do you take any daily vitamins? No, but I definitely should be.

Who are three of your favorite fictional characters of all time? There’s so many to choose from, though.

If you had to give the world a pre-existing mythological/fictional being, what would it be? Superheroes, maybe? 

When buying Slurpees, if you do, do you get only one flavor or mix them? I always liked mixing Coke and cherry together.

Do you have a favorite 7Eleven food? I liked getting snacks and drinks from there, but I never ate their pizza or hot dogs or anything of that sort.

Do you have any desire to learn (a) foreign language(s)? Which? I’d just like to be fluent in Spanish.

If you could have any career, "realistic"-ness aside, what would it be? I still don’t know.

What are three memorable movies from your childhood? Mary Kate and Ashley movies, Disney movies, and The Rugrats Movie. Ha, I know I cheated by grouping some together, but whatever.

Do you, personally, put a space after ellipses, or not? No.

What do some of the things that inspire you have in common? I haven’t felt inspired in a long time.

Micky D's sweet tea, y/n/other? I used to like it when I was younger. I couldn’t even tell you the last time I had it, though. 

What are three of your best (non-physical) qualities? Blah.

What are three of your worst (again; non-physical) qualities? Blahhhh.

What is one of your firmest beliefs? My belief in God.

Do you ever question things until you're unsure of even the silliest thing? Sometimes.

Do you have anything that keeps you from doing something you'd truly enjoy? My health.

What are your three biggest pet peeves (personality-wise) in others? Arrogance, close-mindedness, and people who just jump on the bandwagon with certain things without doing their own research and forming their own opinions, not even really knowing what the issue is, they’re just following the crowd. 

Do you work to fix your faults? Or at least, admit to them? I’m quick to own up and admit to all my faults, but do I do I shit about them? ...

What are three of your best physical qualities? (NOT EYES!) Blehhh.

What are some of your greatest aspirations? I don’t have any. :/

How do you hope the world will change, if at all? I wish we could see less division and violence.

Who are three (fairly known) people you find very intriguing? Hmm.

What are three things that make you the happiest? God, my family, and trips to the beach.

What is/are your view(s) on god, religion, spirituality, or relations to? I’m a Christian.

Are you arachnophobic or scared of spiders in the least? YES.

Do you play WoW? What do you think of it either way? Nope.

What kind of computer do you have? Windows 7/Vista/XP/Other? I have a MacBook Air, which currently runs on macOS Sierra.

What are you good at? Nothing.

What career do you hope to have? I really don’t know. :/

Are you taking any interesting classes in school/do you not attend? I’m finished with school.

If you don't attend, are you taking any "lessons" for anything? Nope.

A book/piece that has had an exceptional impact on your life? The Bible.

If you know of pandora.com, what is your favorite station? Actually, I was listening to Pandora recently for the first time in years and came across this 90s, 2000s, and Today’s Hits station that I was really enjoying.

Have you ever "lost" a friend in any way? How did you deal? Yeah, I’ve lost a lot of friends. Some were harder to deal with than others.

Any music recommendations? Check out that Pandora station.

What are at least three of your biggest fears? Losing my loved ones, death, and never getting better/getting worse.

Most recently read book that you liked? I’m currently reading, “Cold Highway” by Mary Stone, which is the 4th book in a series. 

Do you have a piece of jewelry you don't like to take off? No. I haven’t worn jewelry in a long time.

Do you have a favorite quote? Why is it your favorite? I have many. Any odd pastimes you have? I don’t consider any of my pastimes odd.

Are you quirky in any way? (Name them please). My eating habits, for sure. I’m just really picky and particular.

Have any practices you aren't opposed to but wouldn't do yourself? Uhh.

Political standing?

Do you have any piercings/what do you think about piercings? I just have my earlobes pierced.

Do you have a favorite material? My soft, fuzzy throw blanket.

What are three names you'd name a pet if you HAD to get a pet right now? I don’t know. I’d have to see them and see what vibe I get.

Do you like to listen to dorky/amusing music? What would be considered dorky and amusing music?

Coffee vs. Tea vs. Energy Drinks: Order from favorite to least favorite. Coffee, energy drinks (only the Starbucks Doubleshot coffee energy drink), and tea.

Do you like more "fruity" sweets or "savory" sweets? Uhh, I like cupcakes, donuts, brownies, cookies, muffins, and cheesecake type of sweet.

What do you hate the most? My health, myself, and where I’m at in my life.

What genres of music are your favorite? I like variety.

Do you believe in true love? Yeah.

Do you believe in love at first sight? If yes, why? No.

What are some of your favorite clothing accessories? I just wear leggings and graphic tees.

If reincarnation exists, what sort of person would you want to be next? What are some things you believe strongly in? My faith.

Where's your favorite place you've been? Beaches and Disneyland.

What sort of books and movies do you like? Horror, psychological thriller, mystery, and YA for books, horror, psychological thrillers, drama, superhero films, some sci-fi and fantasy stuff like Star Wars, action, adventure, and romcoms for movies.

What's your favorite thing to do on a rainy Saturday? I don’t do anything different, but I do love when it rains.

Is there a book you've read that really touched you? Yeah.

Do you have a favorite artist? As in a painter? No.

PC or MAC? Mac.

What do you love doing? Spending time with my family, reading, scrolling through Tumblr, catching up on social media and trending topics, surveys, listening to ASMR, watching YouTube, watching my favorite shows, drinking coffee, sleeping...

If you could create the perfect world for yourself, what would it be? All my loved ones would be there, good health, money wouldn’t be a concern, happiness, I’d have a house on the beach, I’d be comfortable and relaxed and at peace... stuff like that.

Do you think that fate plays a part in people's lives? No.

Are you religious, spiritual, atheist...? I am a Christian. 

What are your opinions on the media? There’s the good and bad. It can be pretty brutal and problematic, for sure.

Do you think that people throw the words "love" and "hate" around too much? Yes.

What is your favorite piece of technology that you own? My laptop and phone.

What's a piece of technology you'd like to own? I have what I want at the moment. 

Are you afraid of technology developing to where we're too reliant on it? Oh, we’re waaaay past that point.

Does it bother you when people do things to fit in with a certain crowd? When they’re doing problematic things. 

Hot or cold? I’d much rather be cold. I like being wrapped up in a blanket, wearing hoodies/sweatshirts, and drinking hot coffee. Being hot is just miserable.  Do you think that Bzoink should extent the character amount for questions? I don’t use Bzoink.

Do you have a favorite combination of complimentary colors? A lot of colors look nice together.

Do you know why all the young people who have nice cars always look grumpy? I don’t think I’ve noticed that.

What's your favorite odd ice cream flavor? I don’t like any odd flavors. What’s with you and odd stuff?

Where do you like to get your ice cream? I’m not a big ice cream person, but the store is fine, ha. It was nice going somewhere like Cold Stone or something as well, though. I haven’t had ice cream in years, though.

What's your opinion on stereotypes/labels? Labels can be useful in some cases.

Do you ever use random word generators for Bzoinkoids?

Do you believe that history repeats itself? Absolutely. There’s proof of that.

Would you rather learn from your mistakes or just undo them? Ha, it’d be nice to be able to undo them.

What was the most interesting class you had in school? I always enjoyed English. And then of course I found a lot of my psych classes interesting. Do you write? If so, what? Nope.

Do you have a favorite website? Tumblr and YouTube.

Do you think that the quality of TV shows is going down? No, there’s so many good shows.

Do you have a favorite culture? Learning about different cultures is interesting. What was a story you heard as a child that really affected you? Hmm.

Who was your favorite grade-school teacher and why? Mr. McG, my 4th and then 8th grade teacher. He was everyone’s favorite. He made learning so much fun and really cared about his students.

Do you think that the world will end? How? Yes, how the Bible says it will.

Do you believe in Global Warming? Have you researched it? Yes.

Do you prefer piercings or tattoos? I only have my earlobes pierced and I have zero tattoos, soo I can’t say I’m big on either one.

Do you remember your dreams? Very, very rarely.

[recentanimenews]

FEATURE SERIES: My Favorite One Piece Arc with Steve Yurko

  I love One Piece and I love talking to people who love One Piece. And with the series going on 23 years now, there is a whole lot to talk about. As the series is about to publish its 1000th chapter, a true feat in and of itself, we thought we should reflect upon the high-seas adventure and sit down with some notable names in the One Piece fan community and chat about the arcs they found to be especially important, or just ones they really, really liked.

  Welcome to the next article in the series "My Favorite One Piece Arc!"

  My next guest in this series is Steve Yurko, co-host of The One Piece Podcast, a podcast with a subject you can probably guess. He's also a former storyboard artist for Rick & Morty and is currently working for Netflix Animation. As a ride-or-die Sanji fan, Steve chose the Baratie Arc, where Luffy and the gang run into an East Blue restaurant with a cool chef that loves to cook and kick.

  A note on spoilers: If you haven't seen the Baratie arc yet, this interview does contain major plot points. Watch the Arlong Park arc starting RIGHT HERE if you'd like to catch up or rewatch!

    Dan Dockery: So a friend tells you, "I'm done with the Syrup Village arc and I'm not sure if I want to watch this next one. I think I might be tapped out on this whole One Piece thing. In one sentence, how do you get them to stay and watch the Baratie arc?

  Steve Yurko: The Baratie arc laid down the foundation and created the formula of the One Piece arc as we know it.

  That's pretty good!

  Yeah, I’d say that, when I first started it, One Piece was my third favorite. I was more of a fan of series like Shaman King and Naruto, but after Baratie, things shifted. It was a turning point for me. I would hope that it would do the same for anyone who’s, say, previously apathetic towards the series.

    How old were you when you first read it? Or watched it?

  It feels weird to say this, but my introduction to One Piece was Chapter 1. Like Dragon Ball Z, the first episode I can remember watching was, like, Yamcha training on King Kai’s planet, and I’d get Goku and Yamcha confused and stuff, because I had just dived in. So for me to start a story like One Piece from the beginning is kind of rare. I was 15, I think.

  So, we're jumping into Baratie, and we first see the guy with the brass knuckles, Fullbody. He's trying to act cool on a date and he's being mean to everyone else. And then we have Sanji being typical Cool Sanji and Fullbody acts up and Sanji just tears through him. How did you react? Did you know immediately that you'd like this waiter?

  Well, I don't want to alarm you here, but my first thought was “Sanji’s cool!” I’d seen images of him before, and I saw his black suit and blond hair and I figured, “Oh, another crew member, probably. Looks distinct enough.” So I often have to look back and wonder “Did I like him because of his edgy coolness?” but I think now it’s because there were more layers to him. Like, he definitely stands out from the other Straw Hats, but he also has this distinct fighting style with cool reasoning. He’s a cook and he doesn’t want to bust up his hands trying to punch people in the face, so he uses his feet. So, he does like these cool capoeira kicks, which only gets better as they go along because I feel like so many anime characters, the stronger they get, the more they start to fight the same with fast volleys of punches and laser blasts. So Sanji’s kicks are a great way to differentiate himself from the main cast and other anime heroes. 

  So, then we have Luffy, he shows up by damaging the Baratie. Enter: Zeff. Full disclosure: In my infinite naivete when I first watched One Piece, I thought Zeff was going to be the new crew member. And then I thought Gin was going to join the Straw Hat crew. And then when Sanji finally joined, I was like, "This guy? Really? Dark horse candidate over here."

  You didn’t know yet?

    I guess I hadn't watched the first ED yet — when the crew slowly shows up and stands beside one another.

  You saw Usopp’s silhouette appear and thought, “Eh, I’ve seen enough.”

  "That must be all of them."

  It happens.

  So, you meet Zeff, and you learn about Sanji and Zeff's relationship, and we get a big One Piece flashback. What do you think of that? Because it would become a staple of the series to kinda pause, see what happened to an important guy, and then come back.

  Such an incredible story and so gruesome and terrifying. Sanji’s original flashback is so underrated because it could happen to anyone! Like, you’d have to go out of your way to get stranded on an island, but going days and weeks without food or any real comfort? I think people underestimate how traumatizing that would be. And then Zeff losing his leg because he hacked it off for food, it’s brutal. Just thinkin’ about that, I feel it in my shins. Because that almost happened to me with a minor injury. I let a minor injury get infected, and I could’ve been close to losing a leg.

    Wait, what? Gahd.

  I was doing box jumps at a gym, and my shin hit the corner of this wooden crate.

  Yeah, those things have no give in them.

  Absolutely. And at the time, I thought it was just this dark spot on my shin. And I figured it was, ya know a bruise. So I let it be. And then I picked at the scab and I realized “Wow, that’s a little deeper than I thought. I guess I’ll go to the doctor if it gets worse.” And I kept going to the gym, wearing pants over like this open wound. And my left leg is so swollen. So I went to two different doctors, as the first one did tests and then sent me to another one. And when this doctor saw me, the look on her face said “Oh, this is bad.” So I laughed out loud about how dumb I was and the doctor turned to me and said “This isn’t funny. This IS SERIOUS.” It had gotten infected with bacteria and it was spreading, and she just took a sharpie and drew around the infected area, and gave me antibiotics and was like “You have to keep this elevated, and if the redness goes outside of this line, go to the hospital.” But luckily, I recovered, even though the doctors were like “Honestly, we thought you’d go to the hospital.” So when Zeff severs his foot with a rock, how does anyone not feel that? 

  Do you think that's one of the reasons Luffy is fascinated by Sanji at first? His mentor, Shanks, lost his arm and was cool about it. Zeff lost his leg and was cool about it. Basically twins.

  That’d be an interesting conversation that we never got to see. Just two dudes talking about how weird it is that both their father figures did that, with only Luffy thinking it’s cool. 

    Don Krieg's ship gets blown in half by an incomprehensibly cool character, Mihawk, the first Warlord to appear in the show. You see Mihawk arrive — what is your reaction to him? Because it's not a case of "The villain of the villain is my friend," but rather "Oh, he did that to the villain? I hope he does not do that to us, as that would suck."

  It’s almost like the good guys meeting the bad guys, and then a tornado comes in. But here’s the thing: I missed the issue of Jump where Zoro fought Mihawk. So I assumed that Zoro had just won. The greatest swordsman in the world shows up and Zoro beats him. Boom. The climax of his character arc has been achieved. Nothing left for Zoro. 

  He just did it.

  I didn’t find out until so much later that Zoro lost. I wasn’t quite aware of what made for a captivating story yet. At that time, an obstacle appears, an obstacle gets taken out, ya move on. I almost want to apologize to Mihawk. 

  I love how One Piece does this though. They do it with Smoker and Aokiji and the like. It reminds me of The Witcher III when you go off the path a little bit, and you're at a Level 4 and then a Level 39 Gryphon swoops down and decapitates you. It keeps the "power levels" interesting.

  Luffy starts up Breath of the Wild and goes right for Calamity Ganon. But Mihawk is like the analogy for the Grand Line. He represents it, without revealing too much. Mihawk is like a Pizza Hut demo disc of danger.

  I really like that. And no one knows, to this day, exactly how powerful he is. Over 20 years later, and we're still wondering how he matches up against Shanks or Blackbeard or whatever. One Piece has so many characters where Oda hasn't shown his full hand in regards to them, yet we're totally emotionally invested in them. That's good storytelling.

  He’s doing something right. And I love that Mihawk has a little character arc here, too, where he shows up nonchalantly slicing up Krieg’s ships, probably doesn’t expect much, and then he’s taken aback by Zoro’s gusto, because he hasn’t seen anyone like that in a while. And he slices Zoro down. But he respects him, when in the beginning, he clearly didn’t respect anyone around. Mihawk wants to see him be better and try to take him down one day. For him to willingly build someone up like that is rare. Like Frieza wouldn’t do that.

    So, Don Krieg — what were your opinions of him at the time? Because he's a really bad guy surrounded by more morally grey guys like Mihawk and Gin.

  What I like about the East Blue saga is that every main villain is an antithesis of Luffy and what makes Luffy a truly great captain. Buggy is all about treasure. Kuro is about ambition and the fortitude to be a pirate. Krieg is about might and strength, and Krieg thinks he has both of those because of his weapons and armor. But Luffy has willpower and ambition and doesn’t let the world change his views. Luffy is incorruptible whereas Krieg is willing to poison his own crew when stuff starts going south. Krieg isn’t fondly remembered, but he really serves his purpose in the story.

  So, after Krieg is defeated, Sanji turns down Luffy's offer to join the Straw Hat crew. Now, he knows this is a bad idea. He's not gonna find the All Blue floating around on the Baratie. Why doesn't he go immediately?

  Well, he knows it’s a bad idea but he’s completely misinterpreting Zeff’s sacrifice. He feels that since Zeff sacrificed his leg, he has to repay him by working for him indefinitely. But the reason that Zeff did that was because he wants Sanji to live on and chase his dream. That’s why Zeff took pity on him in the first place. He’s an older, worn-down man now, and he stopped chasing his dream. And now he wants to see Sanji or someone get a win. It lifts his spirit to see Sanji and live kinda vicariously through him. 

  So, the second time I ever cried over One Piece was during Sanji's goodbye and Zeff's "Don't catch a cold." The first time was when that little dog was trying to protect his dead owner's shop in Orange Town, but that's a different story. But this shot of Sanji on his knees thanking Zeff with all the cooks surrounding them is so iconic, and Sanji's acting like it's a gift that Zeff gave him that Sanji could never repay, while as you said, Zeff just wants Sanji to be happy. What did you get out of that? I assume that you're a human with human emotions.

  I cry every time I watch that. When I first saw it, I was like “How? How is a series this good?” And there’s so much to that ending sequence. Because the Baratie is built on this rough, angry masculinity. Just these dudes being mean and fighting each other and customers all the time. There’s never a time or a place for lending a shoulder to someone else. No emotional embraces of any kind. Just everyone berating everyone. No one can open up — just stupid man babies. And then you get to this moment where Sanji is leaving and they’re all trying to be cool while playing it off. Especially Zeff, who can’t give a legitimate goodbye, but rather a “Don’t catch a cold.” But there’s so much to that statement and the facade crumbles. All these grown men start bawling. 

    I've never thought about it that way. There's all these little hints of kindness, like feeding the bad guys, and it's a masculinity powder keg. And then Sanji, in an ultimate display of putting his heart out there, bows to the man who saved him and the keg explodes. That's really cool.

  ONE PIECE LIGHTNING ROUND!

  Favorite One Piece character?

  Sanji

  Favorite One Piece villain?

  Enel

  Favorite One Piece moment?

  March to Arlong Park

  Favorite Straw Hat Crew pairing?

  Luffy and Zoro

  Favorite moment of the new Wano anime arc?

  Soba Mask’s debut

  If you could eat one Devil Fruit, what would it be?

  Whatever Kanjuro’s fruit is

  Moment that made you cry the hardest?

  Sanji leaving the Baratie

  Moment that made you cheer the loudest?

  Straw Hats at the Tower of Justice standing across from Robin

  One Piece location that you'd like to live in?

  Whole Cake Island. Ya eat well, ya know, you can survive Big Mom

  Favorite fight scene?

  Sanji vs Mr. 2, of course

      Stay tuned for the next installment of "My Favorite One Piece Arc" as we speak with Botchamania creator Maffew about his favorite One Piece arc: Alabasta!!

        Daniel Dockery is a Senior Staff Writer for Crunchyroll. Follow him on Twitter!

  Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features.

By: Daniel Dockery

[myncisworld-2point0]

[NOTE: This article is from 2014.]

According to some people, Mark Harmon is best known to his fans as Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs on CBS’s hit drama series NCIS. Those people are wrong, of course, because he’s always going to be Freddy Shoop, a summer school teacher in over his head in 1987’s appropriately-titled Summer School. Harmon turns the ripe, young age of 63 today, and it’s clearer than ever that this man is in possession of a map that leads to the Fountain of Youth, because Harmon ages with grace, am I right, ladies? In fact, while it’s no wonder why this actor was named People’s Sexiest Man Alive in 1986, it is rather shocking that he never received that accolade again, specifically in 1987, when the most important work of his career was released.

The coke-fueled era of the 1980s in Hollywood was filled with more high school movies about slackers and smartasses than anyone actually needed, especially when it came to featuring students who looked like they were older than the teachers. Summer School was always perhaps the most underrated of the decade’s tributes to slackademics (trademark pending) because what it lacked in the typical star power of, say, a John Hughes film, it more than made up for in creating arguably the most creative collection of “teenage” dipshits than any film of the genre. At the same time, it showed that Harmon, who was probably best known at the time for his role as the HIV-positive Dr. Robert Caldwell on St. Elsewhere, had a strong sense of comedy, while also confirming (along with her debut on Cheers that same year) that Kirstie Alley was much, much more than just a really attractive Vulcan.

Summer School isn’t just some cult classic that people love to mention whenever someone randomly asks, “Hey, whatever happened to Dean Cameron?” It was actually well-received at the box office, earning $36 million in theaters on what I assume was a budget of a few rolls of nickels and someone’s baseball card collection. Critics, however, were a little more mixed on this mindless comedy, as Roger Ebert gave it one-half star out of four, which sounds a lot better than one star out of eight, so you know what? I’ll take it.

Maybe in the movie business we could coin the term vaporfilm, for movies that zip right through our brains without hitting any memory molecules.

“Summer School” is a movie like that, a comedy so listless, leisurely and unspirited that it was an act of the will for me to care about it, even while I was watching it. This movie has no particular reason for being, other than to supply employment for people whose job possibilities will not be enhanced by it. (Via RogerEbert.com)

Here’s a tip for all of you aspiring film critics out there, courtesy of King Ebert – if you’re watching a movie with a title as lazy as Summer School, and the opening of the film features a school’s teachers trying to haul ass after the bell on the last day of the semester so they don’t get suckered into teaching the titular course, get up and walk out. Leave the movie for those of us who love to watch stupid movies and go to the next theater to watch and analyze La Bamba. Perhaps that’s why the fan reviews of Summer School on Netflix seem to be so glowing, as I only found three that were two stars or less. In fact, here’s the worst of them all:

Nothing but trash. Nothing worth seeing. Degenerate teens in bad need of harsh discipline. It’s depressing to think that so many young people actually enjoy this trash. This movie is immediately available from NF while so many more interesting ones languish in the ‘saved’ section, or in ‘short wait’, ‘long wait’, or ‘very long wait’ status. Just one more nail in the coffin of American culture, or lack thereof.

Thank God Armond White weighed in. The majority of people, myself included, fondly remember Summer School for what it is – a fun, stupid movie that was meant to make us laugh, while perhaps also rubbing our noses in the awesomeness of 80s California if we didn’t live there. But I’ll take this analysis one step further by laying out these 10 very important lessons that I took away from Summer School after watching it this morning, in paying tribute to Harmon, a man who was Kevin Costner before Kevin Costner was Kevin Costner.

Always put sunglasses on your dog.

Fact: 100% of movie posters that have dogs wearing sunglasses on them are movies that I’m willing to at least watch. The movie could be called This Dog Dies from Space AIDS, and I’d still be curious to see why that dog is wearing sunglasses.

Always have an escape plan.

When everybody else is hauling ass from the faculty parking lot at the last second, there’s no reason that you shouldn’t already be packed for your trip to Hawaii. I don’t like to point fingers, but Mr. Shoop’s girlfriend is clearly at fault here. All she had to do was pack the car for him, and he could have jumped in and taken off for the airport. Instead, Kim kicked her man while he was down and not only snatched her ticket to Hawaii from the pocket of his rad flowered shirt, but she also told him to drive her to the airport. I don’t mean to offend anyone who is overprotective of fictional characters, but I hope that Kim was eventually fed to the volcano gods.

Also, let’s consider this a lesson within a lesson – would you walk away from your teaching job right now if someone handed you a winning lottery ticket for $50,000? I say no. Just pass all of the morons while you spend the class time reading up on investment opportunities.

Never be afraid to encourage the creativity of your students.

https://youtu.be/-5Pku48YPFo

The true sign of a teacher’s efforts in a classroom is how far the students are willing to go to show others their appreciation of his work. In Shoop’s case, once he resigned because his students were greedy little pricks, those same students objected to a new teacher taking over the class by staging a gruesome and horrifying murder scene, complete with two of the students wielding chainsaws, declaring themselves psychopaths and thus taking credit for the violence. Of course, I can’t stress this enough, no high school students should ever think about trying to recreate this scene today.

On a side note, and I hate to nitpick true artistic masterpieces, if you’re going to have a severed hand pull a dude’s tongue out of his mouth and slap him with it, it’s really important that he not blink. Damn it, people, we need accuracy.

Being a male teacher in California in 1987 was probably terrifying.

https://youtu.be/farC0cWkpvc

Between Summer School and Revenge of the Nerds II: Nerds in Paradise, 1987 was a huge year for Courtney Thorne-Smith. Hell, both movies came out in the same week in July, when she was just 19 years old and poised to become the next big things in terms of girls that all teen boys wanted to marry. Unfortunately, her movie career never really panned out, as the last live action role she had on the big screen was as Natalie in the Carrot Top hot fart Chairman of the Board. Her TV career was obviously a lot better, but that’s neither here nor there. Having her play a lovelorn surf goddess crushing on Shoop probably lured a lot of guys to the teaching profession, only to have them learn the hard way that prison sucks.

Additionally, there was the foreign exchange student Anna-Maria Mazarelli, who would grow up to win our hearts as Alotta Fagina. Was it standard procedure for foreign exchange students to be shoved into remedial English classes upon arrival? Sure.

It’s important to support fine arts programs.

https://youtu.be/u0kF24ceZMI

When I write about how hilarious it was how Hollywood tried to make us buy that some actors were teenagers when they were clearly at least a decade older, Ken Olandt is really Exhibit A. The guy who played Larry, the sleeping student by day and male stripper by night, was actually 29 when he was portraying a 17-year old, which is pretty hard to pass when very few teenage boys A) look like that and B) are hired to shake their dongs in strip clubs. Still, glaring age gaps and statutory and employment laws aside, it was nice to see that Shoop was so cool about Larry’s awesome after-school job. That is until he was busted by his mom and presumably spent the next decade in therapy.

It’s not lying if the company ripped you off in the first place.

The first time that I ever saw Summer School, I was convinced that the part about writing letters to companies to get free stuff would work every time. I spent a lot of time trying to write letters to the companies that made my favorite toys, so I could convince them that the action figures and especially the vehicles that I couldn’t afford had been broken. But then I realized that I might be called on my BS, and guys in suits might show up to my home demanding to see the broken toys, and then I’d be screwed and sent off to prison for lying. Ultimately, owning Krang’s fortress wasn’t worth a life spent in prison making license plates, which is how TV and movies taught me that license plates were made.

Jail in California looks very scary.

I still don’t know what the guy with the mustache is doing with his hand, but it’s really scary and I don’t want to ever have someone do that to me, so I’ve chosen to lead a life on the straight and narrow. Thank you, Summer School, for teaching us that jail is filled with scary perverts who want to do bad things to shirtless men on roller skates.

No matter the risk, steal your boss’s girlfriend.

https://youtu.be/B7ZTNm5o780

Vice Principal Gills was a pretty big bite in the ass, so we had to cheer for Shoop in pursuit of Robin Bishop, because Shoop was the coolest and his girlfriend had only recently taken off for Hawaii without him. Sure, Robin was kind of stuck up because she questioned the legitimacy of taking students to something as awesome as a petting zoo, which produced adorable moments like this:

And she also wore a denim shirt tucked into a different shade of denim skirt, because it was the 80s, but she had a good heart and she just wanted what was best for all students, even if it meant agreeing to a date with Shoop to get there. Also, Gills looked like a total goober-douche, and there’s no reason he should have been with Robin.

Education can be a compromise.

https://youtu.be/LzdoMQL_jR8

Is Alan Eakien one of the most underrated teen nerds of cinema? I say yes. That kid may have been dumber than rocks compared to his genius brothers, but he negotiated circles around Shoop. In exchange for a slightly-above-half-assed effort from less than half of the original class roster*, Shoop’s couch was set on fire, his goldfish murdered and car wrecked, bookending that whole going to jail for the two D-bags thing. Things could have been considerably worse, too, because Robin could have tried to get him banned from teaching for the rest of his life for allowing a female student to live with him.

But ultimately Shoop sacrificed so much for the sake of helping a few of his students learn some lessons about life, since they didn’t all pass their exams. Is he a good teacher for that or was he just an idiot being taken advantage of by other idiots? Especially idiots who looked like this:

Being an idiot isn’t all that bad, so long as you’re not a total idiot.

https://youtu.be/8fvhchY0UmY

Hey, in the end, some of those kids passed their exams, and the most important of them all was Pam, because that meant she could move on and not try to make it so Shoop returned to jail. This guy went from being just a run-of-the-mill bro’s bro gym teacher to making an impact in the lives of some kids who looked like they were grown adults. Sure, he couldn’t even talk a 17-year old out of stripping, and he allowed some of his students to treat the foreign exchange student like a sex model, but Freddy Shoop probably learned more than anyone.

Also, he totally stole the douchebag Vice Principal’s girlfriend, and Wonder Mutt found Bobby again in the end, so this really was a movie with a beautiful and happy ending.

[bookishable]

harry potter opinions

not all of these are unpopular

dumbledore should have been in slytherin

the only reason people ship dramione is because they think the actors are good looking, if the characters had been played by actors who aren’t conventionally attractive people wouldn’t ship them

draco and hermione are just not compatible at all

fred’s death was the worst one

the golden trio belong in gryffindor because they use the traits they have from other houses in order to be brave (harry has ambition to survive and a strong sense of self-preservation, ron’s loyalty helps him defend others “if you want to kill harry you’ll have to kill us too”, yeah thanks for ruining that movies, and hermione often uses her intelligence to find solutions and work a way out of a situation)

kreacher is more likeable than dobby

on balance the order of the phoenix is the worst film

i agree that the sorting system should be based on the traits you value most not the ones you have, and if this is canon then it should have been made clearer in the books

snape is not a good person but one of the best characters

it’s pointless to compare james and snape to figure out who is a worse person they had totally opposite lives

slughorn is a better example of a flawed but good character/person than snape

luna embodies ravenclaw house more than any other character

it sucks that ravenclaw has only luna as good character representation, we had cho who became a bigger character, but so many people in the fandom hate her and her relationship with harry ended badly from his pov

harry potter is the most underrated character in harry potter which is a crime

kreacher’s tale should have been in the films

percy, fred, george and ron could all have fitted in slytherin fight me

the best portrayed character in the films was snape

most of the hogwarts professors were also very accurate to the books and well acted, especially mcgonagall, sprout, lockhart, flitwick and madame pomfrey (although she should have had more lines from the books)

oh and also filch

daniel radcliffe looked most like harry potter in prisoner of azkaban

charlie and ginny fit in gryffindor the most out of all the weasleys

ravenclaws are probably the ones who procrastinate the most

peter pettigrew is such an interesting character

dean thomas needs more appreciation

ron and hermione are simultaneously the best couple and the most annoying couple

pettigrew should be viewed as a true marauder not just someone who tagged along with the other three because that’s what made his betrayal so terrible

regulus black deserved better

fleur delacour is underrated but i’m glad to see she’s starting to get more appreciation now

i could write a 300 page essay on how amazing harry and ron’s friendship is

it annoys me when people make harry potter as vines videos and just stick the name padfoot over any video of a dog even if it has no relation to sirius

most of harry’s escapes were due to luck and i love that he acknowledges that

but this doesn’t make him any less brave or skilled

the deathly hallows is the best book

the idea that mary poppins is a witch is more canon than hogwarts being a school (which isn’t saying much because honestly the only thing the students learnt there was that they lived in close proximity to several things that could kill them)

dumbledore is a better person than everyone makes him out to be

aberforth dumbledore is underrated

the best house pairing is slytherin and hufflepuff

harry should have named his children sirius, remus and ruby (rubeus), but i totally get why he used his parents and dumbledore’s names even though i can’t accept severus or luna

i still love harry and luna’s friendship and i guess since ginny was close friends with her too they both chose her name

jk rowling is not a bad person, yes she has done some controversial things, but people should be more appreciative of the world she created and how she encouraged generations of children to read

harry and hermione’s friendship is so precious

i love ron because he is a realistic character and a great guy

the crimes of grindelwald should have been named ‘the rise of grindelwald’

people need to stop complaining about characters being portrayed as poc in fan art, these artists dedicate their time to creating something and it’s their choice how they interpret the characters

also i’m sure lots of artists don’t design them this way just to encourage diversity, it can simply be a stylistic choice and some probably just prefer to draw them this way

not all slytherins are obsessed with the colour green omg

same applies to the other houses and their house colours, i just see the slytherin one more frequently

voldemort’s movie death is atrocious

but cool use of cgi i guess

ginny and ron were ruined by the films but not the actors

so was the entire weasley family a little

arthur and bill should have been in ravenclaw

molly should have been in hufflepuff

the whole “calmly“ thing doesn’t really annoy me, but i do think that dumbledore was too angry generally in the fourth film (maybe this was purposeful for the character i just prefer book dumbledore)

this leads to my conclusion that goblet of fire is the second worst film

i actually liked crimes of grindelwald, but i thought the first film was better because it was quite different to the harry potter series

however,, even though cog was very plot heavy, bear in mind that they are setting up for 3 more films. the first has to be simpler to set the scene and kick off the franchise, just like philosopher’s stone. the next film will naturally have more to it. it was dark because grindelwald played a bigger part. this is just like the chamber of secrets film (a lot of people dislike it) which was also plot heavy and had a different feel to it. people need to give it time, there’s 3 more films

jk rowling needs to write a new children’s book with a new universe to harry potter, and leave the harry potter franchise alone after fbawtft. it’s fine as it is. she still has the talent to create something great

the books are infinitely better than the films

even though i disagree that all the weasleys belong in gryffindor, i support the idea that they all have the same values and would probably choose to be sorted into gryffindor over the other houses

[disappearinginq]

Tag Game

Tag Game

I was tagged by both @amandagaelic and @waitingforthestarstofall

1. What was the last movie you watched in theaters? I think...either Little Women or Knives Out (for the second time). 

2. What’s your favorite game to play? One that I call Murder Mansion, but I think is actually called Betrayal at House on the Hill or one called Bang! - mostly because it was the most hilarious introduction to a game I have ever had where I got to play a trigger happy unlimited round packing Sheriff who everyone was trying to kill and my besties from the dawn of time were in fact my loyal deputies. 

3. Chocolate or vanilla? Vanilla, if I must only pick between those two.

4. What’s the last show you binge-watched? Yellowstone or Locke & Key

5. Do you have any pets? Oh dear. Yes. Three cats, two horses, and three dogs (though technically I might own a third horse, who knows at this point?).  

6. What’s your favorite fairy tale? Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves. 

7. Who’s your favorite superhero? Batman - not the one that they keep portraying as an abusive asshole like Howard Stark, but the one who legit went to court to keep Jason Todd as his son and dipped out from being Batman and Bruce Wayne social obligations when Jason needed him and collected orphans and tried to make sure they wouldn’t turn out like him. 

8. Who’s you favorite Disney Princess? Pocahontas or Tiger Lily probably, though I was never really a fan of the princess movies. I liked Treasure Planet and Great Mouse Detective where there were zero romantic subplots or princesses. 

9. Where’s the first place you’re going to go after the social distancing is over? ALASKA. BECAUSE THAT WAS THE PLAN BEFORE THIS HYAH! SHITSHOW! 

10. Cookies or Cake? Cookies. I am weirdly not a fan of cake. 

+ 10 questions from @teenwolf-theoriginals:

1. which show could you watch over and over? Lucifer, Daredevil (and add-ons), Republic of Doyle

2. favourite song lyric? " I choose my eyes wide open/And my heart half-broken every time/Over the gilded golden shackle/And the reassuring sentimental lie.”

3. favourite season of your favourite tv show? Lucifer season 4, Daredevil Season 1, and...whatever season ends with Jake Doyle getting kidnapped and locked unconscious in a shipping container bound for Mexico

4. what never fails to make you smile/happy? Cirque De Sewer videos on Facebook (ren fair comedy show with cats and rats and a former ballerina). 

5. how are you doing with all that’s going on in the world (virus, having to do social distancing, etc)? I feel really weird saying this, but the quarantine is working out freakishly well for me. My sister, who hasn’t lived nearby since 2010, came to visit for our mom’s 70th birthday just before the travel ban, so she’s been here for a little over 2 weeks now, which is the most I have seen her in 10 years. We live in a small town on a farm, so I have a lot to keep me busy outdoors without having to go to public outdoor places. My job is 100% capable of being 100% remote, we always buy from the warehouses when we have coupons so we have plenty of food and paper goods, we have puzzles out the wazoo to keep us busy when the weather is bad, we have a huge garden every year so if this keeps up we’ll have all our own food and eleventy billion movies and crochet projects, etc. I’m also a hella hermit normally, so this is not really all that new. Little mad I can’t go help a friend paint their house, but eh. Small price compared to a lot of others.  

6. we all love new music to listen to, name an artist that is underrated/you think people should check out? Janet Devlin. Irish/English folk singer I found on Spotify. 

7. tv show or movie? TV show. I love the level of character development that can happen when given the opportunity. 

8. favourite holiday? Thanksgiving. All the food. And less work than Fourth of July, because July means I get roped into directing the town parade and half a dozen other things because my parents get me to. 

9. a song that describes you? “Psycho” by Ava Max. 

10. describe your tumblr in three words? Themed = for chumps.

+5 questions from @macspaperclips

1. What is your favorite hobby? Crocheting, or writing

2. What is your favorite book? Or/and a really good book you’ve read recently? Six of Crows duology - a heist series that I got sucked into thanks to fan art and then finding out the main male lead can’t stand human touch and I was like SOLD. 

3. What is your favorite Ship that will never happen (Or hasn’t happened yet)? Not a shipper. I hate ships, because inevitably, ship wars ruin everything. And in some cases, really make me question sanity or mental health of some people. Said I didn’t like a female romantic lead, next thing I get is death threats, and I am totally the type to back track a URL, hunt you down in the real world, and brain you with a hammer. It’s not good for my anger management. 

4. If you could spend the day with any living celebrity, who would it be?  Harrison Ford, because it would be on his ranch in Jackson Hole. 

5. The best worst movie you’ve ever seen. A movie that you know objectively is trash but you can’t help but really enjoy it. The new Robin Hood with Taron Edgerton, or the Four Musketeers.

My questions (answer these if you’re tagged, then come up with some questions of your own, and then tag people):

1) What is your MBTI and/or Enneagram Number? MBTI - I had to look this up - INFJ or ENFJ, depending on how you want to interpret that first letter. 

2) What TV episode is your all-time favorite? The Hay Burner on Bonanza, 

3) What does happiness mean to you? Lack of desire

and tagged on because I was in fact tagged by two people @amandagaelicquestions: 

1) If you’re a fic writer, do you reply to every review? And if so, how long do you wait? I have only recently started getting over my weird phobia of responding to reviews (I also am rather new to AO3 and it was a little hard or impossible to do in FFN.net), so some stories in the smaller fandoms like Magnum, I have tried to respond to all of them, and it takes anywhere from a day to a month, but in Lucifer...oh dear. It’s daunting, and I keep freaking out because I haven’t finished the behemoth that is Damnatio despite it being years, so I don’t want to respond back to everyone saying “I HAVE NO IDEA WHEN I AM FINISHING THIS” in between severe writers’ block. 

2) What color Starburst is the best? Of the original? Pink. Of the options of outward packaging? Blue. 

3) Skittles or M&Ms? M&M’s

4) If you were to learn any new language, which one would you choose and why? Bold of you to assume I would learn only one. I am actually taking...four lessons through Duolingo? Irish, Welsh, Spanish, and Hawaiian (Was learning Navajo, but I made it to food and WTF....nope, kicked my ass). 

My questions: 

If you could be anything else, what would you be? 

If you’re a fic writer, what would you guilty pleasure fic idea that you won’t write because you don’t think anyone else would read it?

Is there something you wish you knew more about, and if so, what is it?

tagging: @dragonnan, @rohanrider3, @sofasurf, @buckky, @ariaadagio, @get-whumped, @itsjustdg 

If you’re busy or otherwise not feeling it - as always, feel free not to play. If you weren’t tagged, I also mean you. You can come play too. 

[shadowron]

Harlequin: The Immortal Elf Metaplot-Railroad Adventure (1st Edition). Part 0: Introduction

Finally, after long last, we arrive at Harlequin. If these early adventures of Shadowrun were a television series, then Harlequin is the two-part season finale.

Wait, not two. Eight. EIGHT.

Figure 1 (above): eight.

There are eight mini-adventures in this one book, consisting of a set of linked adventures about a centuries (millennia?) long feud between 2050’s answer to Richard Dawkins, Ehran the Scribe, and 2050’s answer to The Joker, the eponymous Harlequin.

For those readers about to make a Batman reference, this adventure predates by two years the existence of the character of Harley Quinn, so frag off.

While only danced around in the early material, it was later confirmed that, yes, these two elves are Immortal and were around at the time of FASA’s perpetually underrated yet in some ways superior to D&D game, Earthdawn, set thousands of years in the past.

Do you even quench, bro?

Incorporating metaplot into adventures is always risky, especially in a game like Shadowrun, which has a rich, thick metaplot – like slabs of crunchy peanut butter on freshly baked bread. You cannot write a cyberpunk/fantasy game in the early future without considering the consequences such transformations will have on society, and it’s easier for players to make an instant connection to a known race/culture/profession than it is to absorb such information whole.

Looking at you, Exalted.

Adventures will always have connections to the larger game world, but too much connection and it starts to feel like a Choose Your Own Adventure type story – the players only have the illusion of free will, because in the end, whatever Happens in the world will Happen. This was the route Shadowrun took with many of its later full adventures – publishing a location sourcebook (always good) along with an adventure that requires that sourcebook – and it’s annoying, because if any supplement requires too many other books as prerequisites, that’s going to shut out a huge chunk of players who simply don’t have the money to invest.

The perfect format, I think, was what they did with the Native American Nations Vols. 1 & 2 – each book was half adventure and half sourcebook. Maybe will have to talk about those next.

Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt! Lightning bolt!

But back to Harlequin – which while not having a requisite accompanying sourcebook, does put the players on a Plot Railroad that choo-choos them through eight (EIGHT!)-

Figure 6: Still Eight.

-linked adventures. The overall plot is simple: Harlequin is seeking revenge on Ehran for the former cutting off the latter’s ear several hundred years ago (you know, back when Magic wasn’t present in the world and there shouldn’t be elves in the first place). The connections between them are invisible at first, but by the end, the players are outright TOLD they’re pawns:

"Everything you have been asked to do has struck at some basic part of Ehran's existence. His Past, and Future, Loves and Hates, and Physical and Spiritual selves. By striking at each of these, I have proved his vulnerability to my power.” 

-Harlequin, being kind of a douche

It would be one thing if the players were able to pick up clues along the way, so that they have the chance to piece together the story, but…

This refrigerated container holds the collection of "Elven" ears the runners obtained in the previous adventure, but don't tell them that.

The GM is explicitly told not to do this. And did I mention the railroading?

Without a word of greeting, the man on the other end plunges right in. "You have the flower? That is very good. Mr. Johnson would like to meet with you for one more run…”

You stare at the ceiling as the line goes dead. It looks like you're in this one whether you want to be or not.

Are your players unhappy with this? Too fragging bad!

By now the team may be a little upset with their employer. If they are hesitant to take the job, conspire against them... Make sure the team is hounded, no matter what they do or where they go.

“That's what I love about role-playing games--being told exactly what to do,” Hank Hickey.

Okay, so I probably need to change the tone of this post right now, because you’re probably getting the impression that I don’t like the adventure – which is FALSE! I had a BLAST going through this as a player (in a previous cycle of magic), and think it stands up well. While being honest about its above faults, let’s talk about what it does well:

Mini-adventures

Some places have called Harlequin a “mini-campaign” since the included mini-adventures (as they are called in the book) are not meant to be all run back to back, but instead interspersed with other missions, so that the tenuous connections there are between them are that much harder to pick up on. If you were to run the other published adventures that came before, supplemented with a few scenarios from Sprawl Sites (which contained, using this scale, micro-adventures), you easily could run for months before reaching the conclusion.

The mini-adventures are good for another reason: they’re necessarily short, so that they hopefully could be completed in a single gaming session, as opposed to many for a full-blown adventure. They also contain what should be at the heart of Shadowrun anyway: complete and self-contained jobs that aren’t (at first glance) connected to anything else. They get hired to steal a rare flower, they steal the rare flower, deliver the rare flower to Mr. Johnson, end of mission. No one double-crosses them, the Mr. Johnson isn’t killed, the flower doesn’t animate and eat them Little Shop of Horrors style. Do the job, move on to the next one.

Getting out of Seattle

Seattle is my favorite city that I’ve never actually visited, thanks to Shadowrun. The first adventures were wise to stick to that locale, to establish a place that feels like home, but eventually you’re going to want to go out and visit the rest of the Sixth World. By Third Edition there were “Shadows of (insert place here)” books for most of the globe (notably absent: Africa and Central/South America. There was a mostly written Shadows of Latin America that was never officially published, so that’s something), but this was the first exposure to rest of the world, where the players get to jet off to…

…the castle of a mad troll noble in Bavaria, Germany!

…the deep dark darkness of the Awakened Amazonian rain forest!

And…

Columbia, Missouri!

Fraggin’ exotic, the Show Me State is.

Honestly, more exciting than any of those places is just the idea of the Street Samurai trying to sneak his Uzi onto the plane. Because you know one of the players will try.

Multiple Writers and Artists

In keeping with trying to throw the players off the scent of how these mini-adventures are connected, they were written by 8 different writers and 7 different artists, so that even if you needed to copy some artwork to show the players, there would be no reason to suspect they were from a single source.

Each mini-adventure was based upon a particular Theme, as alluded to in Harlequin’s douchey description above, so let’s get through them…

[zareleonis]

My Star Wars Top 10 of 2018

This year I fell massively in love with Star Wars, learned more about a galaxy far, far away that I ever expected and started this blog, first to liveblog Star Wars Rebels, and later to share my thoughts on whatever new (and old!) Star Wars media I came across. In honor of what, in my mind, was a really fun year for Star Wars, I wanted to share my top 10 list of my favorite Star Wars things that came out this year, across different kinds of media. Read more because it’s really long :P

Honorable Mention: Flight of the Falcon multimedia series (by multiple authors and artists)

Okay, if I’m honest, this gets honorable mention spot, mostly because I felt like putting it in top 10 when it’s really a BUNCH of comics and books would be totally cheating :P One of the more fun things to come out of Solo: A Star Wars Story, this series of loosely connected books and comics whose main connecting factor is the Millennium Falcon (and Bazine Netal’s hunt for it!) is an absolute joy. Cavan Scott knocks it out of the park with the ridiculously fun Choose Your Destiny: A Luke and Leia Adventure. IDW Comics does what’s it does best by bringing together some exciting and unexpected pairs of characters for the last couple months of Star Wars Adventures. In Lando’s Luck Justina Ireland gave us the coolest darn Princess in Star Wars since Leia, Rinetta Gan. And they’re not even done yet, with 2 more comics and Pirate’s Price left to go!

10. Star Wars: Scum and Villainy: Case Files on the Galaxy’s Most Notorious by Pablo Hidalgo

What an awesome and fun book! So much great art, and Pablo Hidalgo always gives 100% with his work. It’s such a creative concept, following Tan Divo and and his descendants, as they report on the criminals and rebels of their day. I completely geeked out over how it gave soooo much neat new information about characters and organizations from ALL OVER the Star Wars universe. It’s an absolute blast!

9. Solo: A Star Wars Story: Tales from Vandor by Jason Fry

This book is AMAZING. Even among the “replica journal” style books that Studio Fun puts out, it stands out as super unique, written from the point of view of the Midnight, the bartender at The Lodge on Vandor (where Han meets Lando), as if he is telling the story to a guest. It’s such a fun outsider’s point of view of Han and the other characters of Solo. The best part though, is the parts of the book that are just a shameless love letter to Star Wars Legends, with nods to stuff like The Wookiee Storybook, LEGO Star Wars: The Padawan Menace and several novels. Jason Fry’s love for the franchise really shines through.

8. Star Wars: Poe Dameron by Charles Soule and penciller Angel Unzueta

This year we said a bittersweet goodbye to Marvel’s monthly Star Wars: Poe Dameron and goodness gracious it was good. Between the Legend Found arc that was to be the original ending and the final The Awakening arc, where Black Squadron is reunited after The Last Jedi, this comic really touched my heart. The last couple pages of issues 25 and 31 still make me cry. :’)

7. Solo: A Star Wars Story directed by Ron Howard and screenplay by Lawrence and Jon Kasdan

THIS MOVIE IS CRIMINALLY UNDERRATED AND I’M MAD AT EVERYONE WHO LET IT FLOP. I’ll admit I wasn’t exactly desperate for a Han Solo Backstory Movie, but Solo was just AWESOME. Just some good, raw, Star Wars-y fun that you can’t help but smile the whole way through. It might not be groundbreaking, but it introduced some super cool characters in L3-37, Qi’ra and Enfys Nest, gave us Maul’s grand triumphant return to the public at large and has INCREDIBLY charming performances by Alden Ehrenreich and Donald Glover as the Han and Lando we all come to love.

6. The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! by Tom Angleberger

If Solo, is good, this kid’s book written to accompany it is even better. I mean, Chewbacca meets K-2SO meets Tooka cats meets teenage bounty hunter/librarian?? On a planet with scary monsters and a spooky evil Force user? Also Cassian is there?? And the daughter of This Funny Hat Dude from Return of the Jedi? Hell yeah!!!!!

The book is hysterical, ridiculously fun and I can’t recommend it enough. I just have to say if you do get it, try and grab the audiobook it’s got a full cast of voices for the main characters including Marc Thompson giving his best Shyriiwook as Chewbacca. I laughed so hard I cried at the narration and a K-2SO’s lines done out loud. You won’t regret it!

5. Star Wars: Women of the Galaxy by Amy Ratcliffe and eighteen awesome artists!

THIS is one of the coolest Star Wars books out there and a celebration of all the women we know and love (and sometimes hate) in a galaxy far, far away. It’s such a wonderful collaboration, created by all women (& non-binary) artists and author. I love that it’s got characters from practically everything—movies, books, comics, video games, you name it! We even got to see characters like Jas Emari for the first time which makes me SO HAPPY. it’s one of the books I come back to all the time just to flip through it and enjoy the illustrations.

4. Star Wars Resistance created by Dave Filoni and executive produced by Athena Yvette Portillo, Justin Ridge, and Brandon Auman

I LOVE RESISTANCE SO MUCH!! I didn’t quiiite know what to expect with the new animated series, but was super excited and it hasn’t disappointed one bit. It’s such a fun show and really enjoyable to have a Star Wars show that is almost just ‘slice of life’ compared to the others. The animation is so cool to me and the characters really cute. I’m ridiculously charmed by all of them, especially our main man Kazuda Xiono and really hyped to see where these characters go. It’s more happy and fun than anything, but I know it will break my heart to pieces soon enough (KAZUDA XIONO. HOME PLANET: HOSNIAN PRIME). I hope more people give it a chance because it really is awesome!

3. Star Wars Adventures: Tales from Vader's Castle by Cavan Scott and various artists

LET THIS BE MY LOVE LETTER TO CAVAN SCOTT AND ALL THE COOL AND AWESOME STUFF HE’S DONE WITH THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE!! I was soooo excited when these came out because it’s such an AWESOME idea, I mean? Star Wars Horror story one-shots connected by a wider plot??? YES PLEASE AND THANK YOU. Doubly so when they star Lina Graf, of the Adventures in Wild Space series by Cavan Scott and Tom Huddleston. I was soooo excited to see her again and it’s amazing to see how she’s grown from a young kid to a brave and capable pilot and Commander in the Rebellion.

Then the individual stories are just awesome. It was a joy to see Kanan and Hera back together again after Rebels (or, well, pre-Rebels). The Dooku story was just amazing and such an enthusiastic tribute to Christopher Lee as Dracula. The Frozen inspired Han and Chewie story was also pretty great and I LOVE that it referenced the events of The Mighty Chewbacca in the Forest of Fear! And, my personal favorite story, the spooky ewok story featuring a young Chief Chirpa and Logray was brilliant and I enjoyed getting a closer first-hand look at ewoks (something we don’t have much of, at least in canon!). All in all just an absolute masterpiece in my book and a great reminder of why IDW Comics’ Star Wars stuff has been so freaking awesome.

2. Join the Resistance: Attack on Starkiller Base by Ben Blacker and Ben Acker and illustrated by Annie Wu

I’M BACK AT IT YELLING ABOUT WHY MORE PEOPLE NEED TO CARE ABOUT THESE WONDERFUL, CHARMING LITTLE KIDS’ BOOKS!! This was such a perfect end to the J-Squadron kids’ story. To me, this series is such a hidden gem and I really hope more people give it a chance. It was wonderful how all the characters’ stories closed out. I loved seeing Jo finally openly defy his parents, Mattis putting his faith in the Force and his friends, the return of Klimo, AG-90 and Dec fighting as brothers but growing stronger for it, and Lorica becoming the hero everybody thought she was. There’s so many fun cameos, from Rey, to Hux to Poe and Black Squadron, with the backdrop of the actual climactic battle in The Force Awakens.

And, one thing I really want to talk about that I love, is how the book (in tandem with the first two) give us the first gay character in a Star Wars kids book, with Dec Hansen. I wish they could’ve said it a bit more explicitly, but we actually got the kid and his friends talking about it in the books? And, with most of the LGBT characters falling more on the “scum and villainy” circles of the galaxy, it’s so refreshing to see a brave and unambiguously heroic gay teenage starfighter pilot trainee. Like, holy shit that actually happened!!!! ANYWAYS READ THIS SERIES I LOVE THEM AND YOU SHOULD TOO.

Oh, also, Annie Wu’s illustrations are AWESOME and I hope she does more Star Wars stuff (Pirate’s Price, out in a week!)

1. Star Wars Rebels created by Dave Filoni, Simon Kinberg and Carrie Beck

I don’t think there’s way I could place anything but Rebels at #1. This show changed my life in so many ways and I’m just. ridiculously thankful it exists. without Rebels, I wouldn’t have this blog, I wouldn’t be up to my ears obsessed with Star Wars and I there’s so many friends I wouldn’t have either. It’s touched my heart in a way that.... gosh I don’t know if I can even think about anything that resonates with me quite in the way Star Wars Rebels has. Pretty sure most if not all of my followers have seen Rebels, haha, but if you haven’t. You won’t regret it. Well, you might. It hurts. I hate to say, but it does. But even if the end destination leaves you heartbroken and uh prone to randomly bursting into tears about it, you will never regret the journey. Everything I learned and experienced with Ezra, Kanan, Hera, Sabine, Zeb and Chopper is beyond precious to me and I’m thankful it exists because it made my year in so many ways.

[earwaxinggibbous]

Eminem - Worst to Best

So I was watching theneedledrop and thinking I could do this too. That’s all the prefacing you’re gonna get.

I know it’s hard to believe I can judge Eminem from an objective standpoint considering I’m such a big fan that I ranked Kamikaze as my favorite hit song of 2018 (my actual favorite song was probably When You Die by MGMT or Stop Smoking by Car Seat Headrest for the record) but I am able, physically, to have negative opinions even about the rap god himself.

My only rule is that this only includes his full-length studio albums. Infinite won’t be here due to my lack of knowledge regarding it, but everything else is fair game. This will be heavily opinion-based.

Let’s go and start from the worst!

9. Revival (2017)

Initially I was gonna put Encore below this one. After all, in my opinion, there’s nothing egregiously awful about Revival in my mind. It just sort of existed to me, like that dead roach that stayed in my high school’s gym for over a month before disappearing without a word about it. 

It wasn’t until I gave a few of the tracks a re-listen that I realized Revival has nothing going for it. This is Em’s sellout album, the one where he collabs with Beyonce, Ed Sheeran and goddamn X Ambassadors in the vague hopes that it’d get him a hit. Songs that don’t bother having clever writing because all they need to do is slap a semi-important pop singer on the hook.

It’s easily Em’s most ballsless album. In a universe where Kill You and Same Song & Dance exist, there is no need for Framed, Em’s almost saddening attempt to return to his Slim Shady roots even though, let’s be honest, the years of Shady are long behind us.

I’m not saying I need Em yelling slurs and talking about murder every five seconds, I just want him to be, for lack of a better word, the most authentic version of himself he can be. And this really isn’t it to me. No amount of politics or wordplay can hide that this is a sham of what an Eminem album should sound like. I don’t need diss tracks, or songs about serial killing, I just want him to say what he wants and not hold back.

Everything about the album is weak and tired. Every song melds into one another, without thought or purpose, only broken up by the celebrity hooks that define them. It’s the blackest mark on Em’s discography, and easily his worst album to date. Not even worth sneezing at.

8. Encore (2004)

I guess we shouldn’t let Em do whatever he wants...

Encore has the opposite problem that Revival does, and it’s a problem I empathize with. Encore is essentially word vomit in album form. It’s the musical equivalent of Jack Kerouac’s spontaneous prose, loud and incoherent and kind of gross. It’s what happens when ambition goes unchecked, and Em just leans a little too far into what the media says about him.

This was also deep in the throes of Em’s drug abuse problem, and it shows. This album feels like a bad drug trip, sludgy and gross and heavy, in a way that makes it hard to move your arms and legs. With these absolutely god-awful sung choruses on songs like My First Single, Eminem dares you to make less sense than him as he rambles like a crazy person through song after song, only taking breaks from his half-attempts at comedy on tracks like Mosh, Like Toy Soldiers and Mockingbird, which try to be serious. But it’s hard to be serious when you’re essentially getting choked in a soup of valium and regret.

I don’t hate Encore like I do Revival, because in some ways I can understand where it comes from. It’s trying to do the same sort of thing its predecessors did, with silly songs and serious ones. But the funny songs are so weird and frankly gross that it quashes any attempt of seriousness. It’s like Eminem thought the only way to make his songs better were to take what his detractors hated about him and turn it up to 11. Songs like My First Single are complete nonsense complete with gut-churning sound effects and a shitty beat, whereas Just Lose It, a song I’m ashamed to admit I enjoy, fills itself with baseless offensiveness and weird reference humor to function. And that was the big hit single off of this album.

Really I think Just Lose It was the best way to sell this album. What says Encore more than a song insisting that Eminem diddles little boys? FACK would’ve been in place on this album, which is not a compliment.

7. Recovery (2010)

Recovery shares a lot of problems with Revival, a lot of radio-bait songs featuring pop artists that have no business being within ten feet of Eminem. But I’ll admit its singles were far superior to that of Revival. No Love was far superior to anything Revival spat out.

I just kinda don’t care about this album. Other than how Love The Way You Lie was permanently ingrained in the cultural consciousness around 2010, I have very few thoughts about it. I remember hearing most of the singles when I was in elementary school, and they were all just kinda fine. Space Bound was okay (other than that coked up line about love being ‘evil’ spelt backwards) and Not Afraid was sincerely underwhelming considering what it was going for.

It’d been diminishing returns for Em for years, so I’m not shocked he needed some time to get back on his feet. But there’s just not much to say about Recovery. I feel like Em was a lot prouder of it than anyone else.

6. Kamikaze (2018)

At some level, I feel like Kamikaze set itself up to fail. And it did pretty well in spite of that.

The album’s main selling point was that it was dissing everyone. Shady’s gonna name names, I remember hearing, as this album dropped right the fuck out of nowhere in the late summer of 2018. Diss track drama has never really been for me, since oftentimes it pits artists I like against one another over petty bullshit. And hearing that Em slammed people simply for disliking Revival only made me more nervous about what Kamikaze’s outcome would look like.

I’m glad to say it was not nearly as bad as I was expecting.

I’m sort of on the fence about this album. While I think it is punchy, and pretty fun lyrics-wise, it definitely doesn’t hold a candle to any of his older stuff. It doesn’t even really hold up against MMLP2. It’s less that I enjoy this album, and more that I enjoy the possibility of Eminem managing to pick himself up after Revival and move into the new age while still being himself.

Easily the worst moment on this album is Eminem calling Tyler the Creator the f-slur and even implying he’s pretending to be gay, which he has since apologized for. However, the scariest thing to me that the line represents is the possibility that Eminem’s personality is too anachronistic. That in an era of young-adult trap rappers with very experimental homemade beats, there’s no longer room for a famous, albeit angry man in his 40′s being backed by a studio. It’s the years of Soundcloud, where anyone can be a rapper, and someone as old and frankly polarizing as Eminem may never truly have the limelight again.

Em’s style has simply fallen behind the times and he will never be content with updating himself, because that isn’t who he is. And while I love that about him, I think it might speak disaster for his career.

I like the songs though.

5. The Marshall Mathers LP 2 (2013)

Now we’re getting into the good shit. The Marshall Mathers LP 2 starts off with a bang, the first song being Bad Guy, a direct sequel to Stan and an incredibly powerful sequel at that. Eminem asks questions about his fame, his identity, and most notably, he fucking gets murdered at the beginning of this album.

MMLP2 strips off all but one skit. No Paul Rosenberg cameo on this one. This was him getting serious after the relative failure of Encore and Relapse. This was, frankly, what Recovery should’ve sound like. With Berzerk being a fun sort of party hit, Rap God is what really got him back on the map. The song asserts his lyrical dominance. It is a brag track, and it earns that right.

Despite it being of incredibly high quality, this is nowhere near Em’s best work, which speaks highly for his track record. The fact that something this well-made is comparatively mediocre when put next to the top four is incredible to me. This album is more of a revival than Revival was. It’s Eminem reaching out of the dirt after being buried and yelling “Hey, I’m not dead yet!” It’s the hearbeat running through a comatose body as they return to consciousness.

But when it comes down to it, I love what this album represents to me more than its content. Aside from Berzerk, Bad Guy and Rap God, none of the songs really stand out either way. It’s all good, of course, but none of it can match up to his older work. Regardless, this album means a lot to me on a spiritual level. Whenever I listen to this I feel like a proud parent, and Em is my son who just completely crushed his elementary school talent show.

It’s a good feeling.

4. Relapse (2009)

At this point it was sort of like picking my favorite child. My number one is obvious, but deciding how to order these three was trouble.

People will probably argue with me saying that Relapse is one of Em’s best, but fuck that. This album is severely underrated among the fanbase, and is an incredibly powerful listen. This album is an auditory representation of rock bottom, in the best way possible.

This is one of the only albums to really define a split between Marshall and Slim Shady, with Slim being a deep-voiced demon and Marshall being a fucked-up middle-aged man who just came staggering out of a rehab center. The way the characters play off of one another is beautiful, Slim trying to manipulate Marshall into his ways and wiles. This also easily has the most horrorcore-type sound and content out of any Eminem album, with Slim occasionally playing the role of a serial killer, such as on 3 am or one of the standout tracks, Same Song & Dance. Insane tells a story possibly regarding Slim’s father, or maybe representative of something else entirely.

One of my few issues with this album, aside from We Made You of all things being one of the singles, is that one of the best tracks is only on the deluxe edition. My Darling ties off the Slim and Marshall story in a nice little bow, plus Careful What You Wish For sweeping up all the themes and putting them in one place.

This album is beautiful, it’s cinematic in a way. It’s deep and powerful and incredibly, incredibly scary, with Em at his lowest point in his life and career. Sadly, it was not well-received critically, which I think is a shame. Clearly they weren’t seeing what I see.

3. The Eminem Show (2002)

Screw Revival, this is easily Em’s most politically powerful album yet. I listened to this whole thing on a boombox I got at Best Buy for 20 dollars and I felt like I had fucking transcended.

This album pulls out all the stops, immediately starting out on White America, a song so goddamn strong that every time little me heard it on the radio I immediately got down and lost my shit. I didn’t even understand what it was about, all I knew was that it was big and important. And it is.

While his first two big albums tried to be weird and threatening, The Eminem Show just wanted to be big, and talk about big things. Eminem fearlessly tears into heavily-charged concepts in White America, Say Goodbye Hollywood and Square Dance. Then on the flipside he aims the gun at himself on tracks like My Dad’s Gone Crazy, Cleanin’ Out My Closet and even Hailie’s Song. It’s a gut-punch of an album, this is where Eminem is truly fearless.

I’ll also say I feel this album is a little bit more accessible, weirdly enough, than Em’s earlier stuff. It’s much less crude and aggressive, but still carries his trademark style. It’s got the skits, he yells a lot still, but the topics are easier to swallow than his earlier albums. I’d say it’s a good entry-level Eminem album if you’re threatened by rape jokes and Em yelling the f-slur constantly. And unlike what Teens of Denial was for Car Seat Headrest, I feel like The Eminem Show manages to be that entry-level album without completely castrating Eminem’s lyrical content.

But even longtime fans can gain enjoyment from this album and how loud and proud it is, how fearless Eminem really is on this album. This one, more than anything, is the unfiltered Marshall Mathers experience. No filters, no jokes, just him and his daughter and Dr. Dre.

But easily the best part of this album is the DVD extras thing where you get a free episode of the Slim Shady Show. Fuck yeah.

2. The Slim Shady LP (1999)

The Slim Shady LP was Eminem’s first really successful work. It was also the first thing he ever put on a CD. Yeah, Infinite was on cassette only. And this album is fucking great. It’s a perfect debut for Eminem. It’s got his first big hit, My Name Is, and a myriad of other great tracks. It’s just good late 90′s rap, with fun beats and interesting lyrics. As much as I love SSLP, I don’t really like talking about it because... yeah, it’s good, I’m just never sure what else to say.

And that might make it sound like I like it less than The Eminem Show, but no, that’s not it. As much as I think political Em is great, I’ll forever prefer nasty rat boy Em any day. This is the Em that inspires me the most, the grody, crude one that reminds me of myself. Best tracks include 97 Bonnie and Clyde, Bad Meets Evil and of course My Name Is. This is also the only album where Ken Kaniff is played by Aristotle. There’s your fun fact for the day.

1. The Marshall Mathers LP (2000)

FUCK everyone else, I respect YOU!

The Marshall Mathers LP is a defining rap album. It’s lyrical perfection, the hooks are god-tier, and it is without contest the best Eminem album of all time. I doubt he’ll ever top this, and if he does it’ll probably break space-time. 

MMLP ticks all the boxes an Eminem album usually should. It’s quirky, it’s comedic, it’s dark, it’s angry, it’s violent, it’s everything I could want and more. But beyond that, it’s the thing that really proved what Eminem can do. He can tell stories, he can do lyrics, he can flow, he has good beats, he can murder his ex-girlfriend, he can get his own songs censored on the uncensored version of his album, he can do it all.

The songs on this just put me in a good mood. Even though they’re horrible, and I don’t mean they’re bad songs. The content is absolutely fucked, this album is not for the faint of heart. But it makes me feel represented, not for being gay, trans, mentally ill or short, but for being a fucked-up weirdo who lived a fucked-up life and just wants to scream and lose his shit. More than anything, this feels like an album that’s there for me, for better or for worse.

The standouts on this album in my opinion are the two “named” tracks, Kim and Stan. These tracks are incredibly disturbing, but they both mean a lot to me and are incredibly written and acted. The Real Slim Shady is still an amazing single with an awesome, hopping beat. I’m Back is incredibly solid, Criminal is cleverly contradictory, every track on this album is great without any misses. If there were enough words in the English language to describe how much I love this album, I’d probably use all of them.

This album couldn’t exist today. If this came out today, it’d probably be thrown to the wayside for a myriad of reasons. It’s too late 90′s, it’s too dark, it’s “problematic”, we have like 500 white rappers now, but for the record: Anyone who writes this kind of music today owes it to Eminem, ESPECIALLY all of the white rappers who insist they’re better than him. (Looking at you, MGK.) Even if he’s not doing that great now, even if you don’t like him, it’d be foolish to not acknowledge what MMLP did for rap. And not only was it influential, but it still holds up to this very day.

So there you have it. All of Eminem’s full albums (besides Infinite oopsies) listed from worst to best. Have any differing opinions? Leave a reply. Just be polite, you filthy animal.

[frederator-studios]

Grace Ellis: The Frederator Interview

Grace Ellis is among the most exciting comic and TV writers working today, and all from coffee shops ‘round Columbus, Ohio. The first comic she created, Lumberjanes, is a NY Times bestselling series, in development as a movie, and brought her home Eisner and GLAAD awards for her cat to try to knock over. Grace is currently writing one of the most magical comics of the year, Moonstruck, but still found time to pen some awesome episodes of Bravest Warriors season 4 (after she determined that the gig was not, indeed, a prank). Grace and I sat down to talk log-doodling, queer representation in comics, and the commonalities between Beth Tezuka and Captain America.

Having written Lumberjanes: were you a Girl Scout yourself?

For a little, until my troop disbanded! Lumberjanes re-connected me with my Girl Scout roots. The inspiration for a lot of the woodsy stuff comes from an outdoor camp I was part of. After college I worked for Autostraddle, the biggest online network for queer women. They host a weeklong sleepaway camp every year called A-Camp. It has a bunch of panels, talent shows, activities - really cool stuff. When I was a camp counselor one year in Big Bear, I made friends with an attendee, Shannon Watters, who’s a writer and editor at Boom! Comics. Later, she approached me about making a comic together.

Wow! So Lumberjanes was your very first comic... ever?!

Yup! The first issue of Lumberjanes was the first comic I ever wrote.

That’s amazing! Wait, backin’ up - what were you doing before?

My big kid job was journalism. I studied a mix of journalism, theater and women’s studies at Ohio State. After school ended I started pitching around and got a gig writing ads for Playbill. Then I got some work with Bustle too. I was doing sort of garbage writing: mostly TV recaps and some vaguely personal stuff here and there. Very little actual journalism. Then I got the job with Autostraddle when the site was still fairly new.

So you taught yourself both comic writing and screenwriting?

Pretty much! I was already familiar with story structure, so it was really about learning to adapt those elements to different formats, and take advantage of each medium. That comes with practice more than teaching. Every format is different. Like with comics, I go panel by panel, one at a time. I have to keep framing in mind while focusing on what’s happening in the scene, and what the characters are saying, because comics are super dialogue-driven. Writing comics is like trying to write the minimum in order to say the most. 

How did Lumberjanes develop from the first ‘let’s make a comic!’ moment?

We drew a lot of inspiration from Ms. Kitty Fantastic and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I developed the concept with Shannon and we started from just rough outlines of the characters. Then Brooklyn A. Allen came on and designed them. And after that we brought on Noelle Stevenson as a second writer. Working all together was really smooth, a cut-and-dry process. We only needed one Skype call per issue!

Which girl in Lumberjanes are you the most like?

Molly - well, I’m always told to answer Molly! She’s the timid and unsure one. But hopefully Jo as well! I like to think that I can be a leader.

How did you come to write for Bravest Warriors?

Shannon submitted me! Benjamin (Townsend, Story Editor) reached out. I actually forwarded the email to my lawyer right away. I was sure that I was getting scammed. I was so excited when it turned out legit!

(“Catbug! You don’t just bust in on someone when they're dukin’. Buddy... we talked about this.”)

Do you have a favorite character in Bravest?

Catbug is the most fun to write. Before pitching the Detective Catbug episode I wrote this season, I prepared by hanging out with a 5 year old. It actually helped! Catbug has the funniest voice, I just love writing him. But Beth is my favorite Bravest Warrior. Once I’d nailed down who she is, I really liked writing her. She kind of reminds me of Captain America: she’s unbeatable and refuses to stay down. And she’s unapologetically herself.

She truly is That Beth. How did you first start working on Moonstruck?

It actually started as a school exercise, with no plan to extend it! 2 years ago I was doing a program with Columbus College of Art & Design, where they partner their artists with pro comic writers. I was lucky enough to be accidentally (I later found out, secretly-totally-on-purpose) partnered with Shae Beagle. The assignment was to write a 5 page scene, with 2 twists; the first building off the second. That became the opening of Issue 1: the first twist is that we’re not in a normal human coffee shop - it’s full of mythological creatures. The second is that the girl we're following who seems totally normal… well, she doesn’t view herself as normal at all.

I’ve wondered why Julie is so insecure, when she’s surrounded by such a diversity of mythological people?

For Julie, it’s really this fear of losing control. She’s has a deep sense that in her werewolf form, she’s not normal. She’s not right. So she’s internalized some really negative stuff about what that means for and about her.

Are there levels of privilege and marginalization in this world around being human or mythological?

Yes - I’ve been working on how to represent societal privilege surrounding mythological and non-mythological people. A big inciting factor in Julie’s story is her falling in love with a girl, who - spoiler alert! - is also a werewolf like she is. But Selena has a totally different perspective on who she is. She’s comfortable with herself.

Your characters are so distinct - what is your process for nailing a character’s voice?

It’s a lot of time thinking about who the character is; how they’d react to things, based on their personalities and what they’ve lived. Living close to a college is a big help because I’m surrounded by people around the age of the characters I write. Overhearing conversations is often inspirational! I also pull a lot from real life and my own friends. I have the best time writing over-enthusiastic characters: the ones that are high energy, always on, and oblivious.  Julie, on the other hand - it was tougher to find her voice. She’s so timid, yet she also has this sardonic edge. It helped when I realized that she would say “Sorry” all the time. It’s her instinct to apologize for herself, even when she has no reason to! After figuring out something like that, that’s core to her character, I was able to grow her voice from there.

What do you find most challenging about writing? And most rewarding?

Being done is very rewarding! And feeling like you nailed it. The worst thing is when you don’t want to write. It’s easier now that it’s my job, because I have to do it. When I was an AV tech at a movie theater, I always wanted to write, but I wouldn’t do it. What’s tough is that I would rather think than write. Thinking is underrated. But the problem is, I know that I should write something - anything! - every single day.

Do you ever do any of your own art?

Nah, I’m not an artist. I draw sometimes. I’m a prolific log-drawer.

Logs?!

Yeah (laughs) I sometimes fixate on one thing and it becomes the only thing I doodle. Logs are that.

That is… oddly fitting! What is your creative process like?

It’s not very strict. My rule is that I leave my house every day before noon and go to a coffee shop. Then I just plug into it.

What do you like to do outside of writing?

Is there such a thing? Video games, especially during winter. Reading a lot of comics, plays and nonfiction. Biographies are great character studies. Currently, I’m reading a novel, The Blunderer by Patricia Highsmith. For writing pretty light and happy comics, I really do like books about heavy guilt and punishment...

Speaking of Patricia Highsmith - with her Price of Salt such a cornerstone in queer writing - what are your thoughts on representation and writing queer characters?

Oh yeah - we’re all familiar with the tropes. The sad stories, the coming out stories. They’re important in their way. But they aren’t what I need to write! I’m not a sad person, so I can’t just put that on. I write upbeat stories about characters who are already out and accepted. I’m a happy, out lesbian. So to represent those characters isn’t just what’s truthful to me - it also says to readers that hey, you can be a happy, out lesbian too!

Do you think there is a market for young adult media with queer characters and themes that didn’t exist a decade ago?

Absolutely. It used to be that anytime a writer put a gay or lesbian character in anything - let alone a main character - they were pigeon-holed as a ‘queer writer’. And a decade ago, that could severely limit, or even ruin, a writer’s career. Now, ‘queer media’ isn’t just a subgenre - gay and lesbian representation is coming into the mainstream. It’s a changing world. Lumberjanes did so well, it uncovered a whole market of tween, teenage girls and queer women. And there hasn’t been enough made for them! Backstagers, Zodiac: Star Force - a lot of the new comics coming out are riding on a wave of realization for the comic companies. They figured out that they were leaving money on the table when it came to queer female audiences.

What’s your advice to people who want to write comics or TV shows?

Write a lot. Write every day, if you can. It’ll make you a better writer. And put stuff on the Internet. It sounds scary, but it’s the best way to get your work seen. At this point, people are getting jobs off of Twitter. Networking is BS!

What is your Dream, or dream gig?

My dream is to write things that I’m proud of in many different mediums. A musical. A video game. A movie. I’m a really big fan of form. It’s an almost intellectual interest: the different things each format brings to the table, and how you work with each to find the best possible way to tell a story.

What are some of your favorite Things?

I loved Saturday Morning Cartoons. Recess, The Weekenders. I like weird slice of life children’s stories. Calvin and Hobbes is a huge favorite. LA Noir is my favorite video game. And one of my favorite comic artists is Alison Bechdel. She does a strip called Dykes to Watch Out For that is absolutely hilarious. ❀

Follow Grace on Twitter and Instagram.

Thanks for the interview Grace! We’ll no doubt be keeping up with you. Can’t wait for the great stories you’ll tell, across all the formats that strike your fancy!

- Cooper ❀

[mermaidsirennikita]

July 2018 Book Roundup

This was a bit of a slump month for me in terms of reading.  But wait!  I read so many books!  Yeah, but I savored very few of them.  Some were mediocre, and several were bad.  Very bad.  Standouts included Riley Sager’s “spooky summer camp reinvented” thriller The Last Time I Lied and the very satisfying conclusion to Kiersten White’s super underrated Conqueror’s Saga, Bright We Burn.  You win some months and lose some months--I hope the next one is better.

My Plain Jane by Cynthia Hand, Jodi Meadows, and Brodi Ashton.  2/5.  A retelling of Jane Eyre, My Plain Jane sees Charlotte Bronte and Jane Eyre as friends at Lowood together, with Jane able to see ghosts and Charlotte desperate to get to the bottom of her secrets.  As Jane takes a job at Thornfield Hall, she is pursued by Charlotte and intrepid paranormal investigator Alexander, in a tale full of ghosts, secret wives, and romance.  I... really don’t want to say I hate this because it had its funny, cute moments that remind me of My Lady Jane, but... I kind of hated it?  It’s partially my own fault, really, because the book was exactly what it described itself to be.  But what worked when twisting history--My Lady Jane focused on Jane Grey--just doesn’t work when retelling a popular book.  Charlotte was quirky girl’d to the point of being twee; she also seemed into Jane Austen, which bugged me because she wasn’t.  And much of Jane’s side of things seemed like condescending fix it fic, in a way.  Don’t you know that Jane only falls for Rochester because she’s a romantic young woman with no life experience (and an obsessed with Mr. Darcy because I guess)????  Maybe I just like the real Jane Eyre too much.  Either way, I’m still going to read the next Jane book, but cannot recommend this one.

The Last Time I Lied by Riley Sager.  5/5.  Fifteen years ago, Emma Davis was the last person to see Vivian, Allison, and Natalie before they disappeared from Camp Nightingale--and the world--forever.  She accused a boy she liked of doing something terrible; and she vanished into obscurity, reinventing herself as an up and coming artist.  But she can’t seem to stop painting the girls, even as she covered them up afterwards.  Upon the prompting of the camp’s owner--and dogged by guilt--Emma returns to teach at the reopened Camp Nightingale, given three new girls to mentor.  Yet she still can’t seem to stop seeing the girls--especially the entrancing, manipulative Vivian.  Riley Sager does something with his books that make me really happy: he keeps on taking a classic teen slasher trope and making a whole book about it.  I loved the sexy-teens-in-a-cabin angle of Final Girls--and this book takes on the whole creepy camp thing, complete with a spooky lake and campfire legends.  He also throws in--for good measure--toxic, intoxicating girl relationships!  Because yes, Emma had a crush on a boy, but her world was really dominated by Vivian.  At one point, I thought that this book would be a 4 out of 5 because as much as I love the tone and atmosphere and the overall story, I wasn’t a big fan of how Emma’s hallucinations worked and the ending seemed rather predictable.  But that wasn’t the REAL ending.  And the real ending?  Just... yes.  The present storyline in this book is good, but the past--mostly Vivian, let’s be real, that’s a girl after my own heart--is fantastic.  

Bring Me Back by B.A. Paris.  1/5.  While stopped at a gas station with her boyfriend FInn, Layla goes missing. Twelve years later--after enduring a period as the prime suspect in Layla’s murder, despite the fact that her body was never found--Finn is engaged to Layla’s sister Ellen.  Out of nowhere, little signs begin appearing that lead Finn to wonder... could Layla still be out there?  WHAT A DUMB BOOK.  I didn’t realize that I’d read one of Paris’s books, the super underwhelming The Breakdown.  If I had, I wouldn’t have tried it.  God, this was fucking stupid.  Literally every twist you would think of, every basic “surprise” is here.  And then one that is so--but the real issue is Finn.  I don’t take issue with flawed protagonists, but Finn was more than flawed.  He was creepy (fine in certain cases) and stupid (never fine).  And for that matter, everyone else was so one-dimensional that it was impossible to sweep aside his shortcomings.  I skimmed this after a point, and I’m glad I didn’t waste any more time on it.

The List by Joanna Bolouri.  1/5.  IT GOT WORSE!!!  I won’t bother with a summary, because this is actually pretty fucking simple: a year (!!!!) after her ex cheated on her, thirty-year-old Phoebe still isn’t over it.  In an effort to revitalize her sex life, she makes a list of sexual experiences she hasn’t tried and wants to, and sets off to check them off with her best guy friend, Oliver.  Okay, admittedly, I should have known that this would be a diary book, which is a style I usually don’t like (with some notable exceptions).  Phoebe has the most annoying voice I have ever read.  It’s as if the author wants to mimic Bridget Jones, but doesn’t understand why people like Bridget and why she came off more as hapless but amusing, instead of just... a moron.  Phoebe is a FUCKING MORON.  She hates her job, she uses cutesy slang words (like, my least favorite cutesy slang words from the U.K.) and describes sex acts in the least appealing way possible.  But it’s not as if the author wants the sex to feel real, because aside from a few mishaps, Phoebe overall has great sexual experiences, even when you imagine that if this is the first time she’s doing them, it’d probably be more awkward.  Like... we’re supposed to buy that Phoebe LOOOOOVES anal after the first time she’s tried it, but she describes it as feeling like “she’s going to the bathroom, but good” basically.  HOT STUFF.  And she’s just a dipshit in general.  She and all of her friends are.  I knew this was definitely going to be 1/5 after Oliver made a joke about stereotypical “Native American” names (a joke that is somehow worse knowing that an author from the U.K. wrote it) but even before then, Phoebe is talking about her lack of sexual satisfaction with her friends all of whom are in their thirties and one of them... is like... humping a couch?  I don’t know why authors who write “sexual” books think that this is normal behavior.  I am in my 20s; I’ve been in weird situations; I know a lot of weird people.  Never has some dry-humped a couch in front of me... as a joke.... or in general.  Wow.  Stupid.

Choose Your Own Disaster by Dana Schwartz.  3/5.  Dana Schwartz’s memoir--detailing her struggles with eating disorders, mental illness in general, romantic travails, and finding herself as a millennial--is laid out in the style of a choose your own adventure novel.  While it’s certainly well-written and takes advantage of its gimmick, I can’t say this was as enjoyable as My Lady’s Choosing.  Obviously, they’re totally different genres, but...  I don’t know.  This wasn’t a fun read to me, even though I think it was important.  Some parts hit too close to home, which isn’t Schwartz’s fault, while other parts seemed overwritten, which is.  A mixed bag.

The Silent Companions by Laura Purcell.  4/5.  Shortly after marrying the wealthy and handsome Rupert, Elsie finds herself widowed and pregnant, sent away to the Bainbridge family’s country estate to wait for her baby to be born.  She’s met with eerie villagers and angry servants, as well as Rupert’s awkward cousin, Sarah.  All of that, however, she could deal with--what’s more unsettling are the violent events that begin occurring in the house, and strange painted “silent companions” that seem to pop up everywhere, their eyes appearing to follow Elsie around.  Perhaps most disturbing of all is the diary Sarah finds, detailing the story of Rupert’s ancestress, Anne Bainbridge--and her mute daughter Hetta...  This kicked off with a slow start; I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to get through it.  But about 50 pages in, things PICK UP.  Especially when we get into Anne’s diary, which is where some of the really creepy stuff takes place.  It’s a spooky, unsettling story that feels like it’s of another time.  If you’re a fan of “The Others”--which I am--I’d highly recommend the novel.  

Bright We Burn by Kiersten White.  4/5.  The final book in The Conqueror’s Saga sees Radu finally forced to make a choice for his future, as Lada’s conflict with him and Mehmed--and all of her enemies, really--finally comes to a head.  I can’t say much more than that, because... final book in the series, and all.  I really can’t recommend this trilogy enough.  Yes, a gender-flipped Vlad the Impaler story sounds weird.  But Lada is a great character you so rarely see in YA--a truly horrible female lead.  She’s awful.  Not a monster, but not really redeemable either, especially after this installment.  And I wouldn’t even say that Lada is the most complex character in the series--that goes to Radu, her brother who is a) gay b) a Muslim convert and c) in love with Mehmed, their childhood friend who is in love with Lada, who kind of loves Mehmed but kind of hates him because he’s about as horrible a she is.  I loved this poisonous triangle of scheming and bad people--Radu is significantly less horrible than Lada and Mehmed, but has his moments--and the world and the supporting characters, and the only reason this book didn’t a full 5/5 is because I think there needed to be more.  The conflict of the trio really petered out a bit for me, and it came down to Lada and Radu.  And I love Lada and Radu, but Mehmed was the kind of antagonist that got their asses in gear, and the book needed that extra kick.  Overall, however, this was a great conclusion--super satisfying, and quite bloody.

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones.  4/5.  Celestial and Roy are upwardly mobile Atlanta residents--she a rising artist, he a young executive--and just over  a year into their marriage when Roy is arrested for a crime he didn’t commit.  Sentenced to twelve years in prison, Roy writes to Celestial as their marriage gradually disintegrates.  When he’s exonerated and freed five years into his sentence, he returns to her.  But Celestial has built up a relationship with Andre, her childhood friend and the best man at her and Roy’s wedding.  The question isn’t just one of who Celestial belongs with--and whether she belongs with anyone--but of whether or not she and Roy ever would have worked out in the first place?  This is a DEEP literary book, y’all.  Not light reading.  And I can’t say it was super enjoyable?  I mean, this is one of those harshly realistic, love isn’t enough tearjerkers.  But it was very well-written, and it examined themes and questions that I don’t think you’d necessarily expect from such a relatively simple premise.  Of course, much of the novel does revolve around being a black man (or woman) in 21st century America--so I can’t critique that aspect.  The only thing I really can say as a criticism is that the older characters in the novel--Celestial and Roy’s parents, primarily--do essentially repeat themselves a good bit.  And again, I can’t say that I like everything every character did or said--but every action came from a very real place.  It’s a harsh one.

Give Me Your Hand by Megan Abbott.  3/5.  Kit is an ambitious scientist, hoping to gain a spot on a PMDD-related study led by her idol.  She’s the only woman in the running, and considered a shoo-in the the “woman spot”--until Diane shows up.  Diane and Kit knew each other when they were younger; and Diane told Kit a secret that derailed both of their lives.  With the weight of Diane’s secret on her mind, Kit begins to slowly unravel, questioning how she should handle a secret that has gone from being another person’s problem, to hers as well.  I’m not one of those people scared off by Abbott’s squicky, literary style of telling domestic thriller stories.  I’m used to her obsession with the female body and feminine mysteries in general.  I’m not sure why this one didn’t click with me.  The writing was still there, and on paper the story is something I should have liked--so I’m saying it’s me, not her.  It may be that the books of Abbott’s I’ve really liked have dealt more with the truly domestic sphere or something more mundane and universal than scientific studies?  I just wasn’t attached to this story or the characters.

The Death of Mrs. Westaway by Ruth Ware.  3/5.  Down on her luck tarot card reader Hal is shocked when she receives word that she is the possible recipient of an inheritance.  Her grandmother has died, and Hal is summoned to her home to hear the will being read.  The only issue is that to Hal’s knowledge, her grandmother was already dead--and with her mother gone, she has no way of knowing who this woman is.  Desperate for money, she goes to the Westaway estate, only to find that the inheritance may not be worth the risk.  This is a very standard mystery/thriller.  Kind of predictable.  I really don’t have much to say about it.  The book wasn’t bad but it didn’t thrill me, so it might be another me/my slump thing.

Love and Other Words by Christina Lauren.  4/5.  Macy hasn’t seen her childhood friend and first love Elliot for eleven years.  When they run into each other in a coffee shop, he’s an aspiring novelist and she’s a resident on the brink of marriage.  As the novel traces the story of Elliot and Macy’s past--and what he did to make her cut off contact with him the same night he confessed his love--Macy is confronted with a decision about her future, and owning up to who she is in the present.  A slump-breaker!  This is a really good romance, y’all.  Elliot and Macy’s chemistry is palpable.  You spend the whole novel worrying less about what drove them apart, and more about when they’re going to get together.  That being said, the best part of the book was definitely the past.  Their friendship felt genuine, which made the sexual tension buildup even better (speaking of: this is one of the few contemporary romances with legitimately good sex scenes).  The stakes aren’t quite as high in the present--it seems painstakingly obvious from the beginning that Macy can fix her issues in a pretty simple way.  And if she didn’t know that, I’d be a bit less annoyed, but she does.  Not much happens in the present, really--that’s just the payoff for what started in the past.  Still, this is a very sweet, sexy, and kind of heartwarming book that I would recommend to anyone who needs something that’s light without being TOO light.

Roomies by Christina Lauren.  3/5.  Holland is obsessed with a guitarist on the subway, and has been for about six months.  By a twist of fate, they finally meet, and through her connections she is able to get him a job opportunity.  The only problem is that Calvin--an Irish immigrant who’s overstayed his student visa--is in the States illegally.  So, out of the goodness of her heart and not at all because she wants to jump his bones, Holland offers to marry him so that he can get his green card.  What could go wrong?  Christina Lauren is, again, great at building up the sexual tension between her characters, and can actually write good sex scenes.  This is a sweet, fluffy, silly book.  I’d recommend it to romance fans.  It’s just not as substantial as Love and Other Words and the plot could have been stronger; I basically skimmed over that stuff because it didn’t really grab me, and focused more on the romantic bits between Holland Calvin.  A quick, nice read, but I’ve read better romance novels.

Lying in Wait by Liz Nugent.  2/5.  Andrew and Lydia, a wealthy couple who’ve fallen on hard time, have buried the body of a young woman in their back yard. Though Lydia desperately tries to keep the secret from their son, Laurence, he discovers the truth before long.  Meanwhile, their victim’s sister investigates Annie’s disappearance, struggling for answers.  Ugh, this hasn’t been a great month for me + thrillers.  This one sucked.  In theory, there were good ideas, and moments of good voice, but the overall execution was very poor.  The characters came off as caricatures, one of the worst things you can do in a thriller imo.  And ooooh, there was so much emphasis on Laurence’s obesity, Annie’s lack of education--it seemed lurid and borderline exploitative at times.  Hard pass.

[pixelrender]

My 5 genres of video games

I used to spend my time on a variety of games from AAA open world titles to small flash tower defense games. I’m still quite fond of many of these games and Kingdom Rush in particular has a special place in my heart as the smoothest tower defense game I’ve ever played. I got obsessed over niche genres from time to time too. I had a short period, in which I read many articles on hg101. Naturally, I got super interested in shmups back then. I still like to play a simple free shmup from time to time, but I avoid more difficult entries these days and I can’t call myself a hardcore fan of the genre.

For the longest time I was big on RPGs and Boiware in particular. I loved Dragon Age and I still plan getting my hands on Inquisition one day. I need to replay Mass Effect 2 and finally finish the trilogy. Baldur’s Gate is still on my shortlist of games to finish and Jade Empire is one of my favourite underrated games to recommend. There were other RPGs than those from Bioware too. Gothic 3 probably qualifies for the game I spent most time with as completing it took me half a year. I still like low fiction of Gothic series and admire compact worlds of the first two games and Risen. Oblivion is my favourite roaming game. The best part about it was bumping into a small settlement in the middle of nature and just be there. The last not least I should mention RPG Maker.  I developed few small games in it and I still sometimes work on three more. 2 of them are actual RPGs. I played and enjoyed many RM games, some of them epic fantasies. So, why is this genre only a honorable mention? I don’t find myself as attracted to it and its power fantasies as I used to. I don’t have time for sprawling epic and there are certain strategy games fulfilling my lust for medieval and characters better. The two basic premises of RPGs aren’t as interesting for me as they used to be. I don’t really care about hero’s journey narrative and I’m little bored with basic mechanics. For example leveling up can be such a chore.

Now my choices are way narrower than they used to be. I still play other games and especially hobbyist and micro RPGs, which might enter my top 5 one day. These are the five genres I purposely follow, build up libraries or knowledge of their game design and talk about on Discord the most.

1. Non-linear platformers

I enjoy myself a good metroidvania. There’s only one thing, which makes a foggy, rainy better. It’s not alcohol. Also, I used term non-linear platformers on purpose. I enjoy sideview platforming and not every metroidvania’s that. There are many different movements and some of them are less fun and there are 3d games, which use Metroid inspired progression. Also, I haven’t played a single Metroid or Castlevania proper. I don’t have any excuse for the travesty. Ok, not being a console guy might give you an explanation of my situation. And with so many likes and clones on steam, I have enough to eat through without touching emulators.

I enjoy the genre’s level design in particular. I think that adding multiple layers and making souls inspired timing based combat or adding too many rpg elements rarely helps. Movement’s still the core. Upgrades/progression is at its best, when focused on obtaining new ways of movement and not stronger weapons. Clever boss fights are always important, but I prefer them to be a puzzle rather than an endurance competition. I have a huge, almost endless list of metroidvanias to play and to base my own one on.

2. Walking simulators

Sometimes I just need to turn off. Games in general are a good resting activity, walking sims and ambient games take it little further. And I usually feel enriched by playing them. I don’t feel like an overgrown child. Walking around studying original aesthetic of their creators. It’s a dialogue, in which I confront and reflect their approach to architecture and aesthetics They are definitely better enjoyed on a big screen with proper audio and smooth performance. They’re quite power hungry as even low poly ones are usually 3d. That’s a problem with my current hardware and software. In general I enjoy low poly and minimalist walking sims the most. They tend to focus more on composition.

Almost walking sims present you with a sense of wonder. You explore unknown and often massive lands. They should let you find your own way, but some of there are more focused and lead. Even if the land’s strange, it’s for the better when it rings a sense of familiar. Going cheap surreal isn’t the way. Landscapes in walking sims can be way weirder than Dali, but they should have their own nature. Walking sims are usually very slow. There’s no activity besides walking, maybe you can pick up an item. Sometimes, you follow a story. It’s hard to define a hard border, where walking sims end and other genres start. Gone Home is about something completely else than pure walking sims, but I still enjoy it for its pacing and ambiance. That brings it very close. Curtain certainly isn’t a walking sim, but the way you move around the apartment and then walk through a corridor to bend time is very much close to timeless scenes of walking sims.

3. Art games - game art

This is a difficult category to define. Art games are usually aiming for more than entertainment. They’re deeper with references to other media or filled with social critique. Having fun sometimes feels bad in them. Game art is even more difficult to define. To put it simply, it’s usually a piece of art using games as its medium. It can have a form of an interactive executable or weird modification of an existing game but the artistic concept is more important than it being a working game. In terms of mechanics, this is a diverse group and vague one, when it comes to game design. Here I can learn from areas more relevant in the real world. They often take on philosophy, ethics, politics, aesthetics and other fields I’m interested in more than in violence and loot.

Some game are clear art games. An easy example is Kentucky Route Zero, which despite it’s artsy nature is clearly defined by its mechanics and sense of progress. The other example from my favourite games would be Little Party. This one’s lighter on mechanics, but it tells a very subtle and civil story and it uses art and creativity more than being a product of it. Proteus would be my personal borderline example. The game’s about complementing and its island are small art pieces. This is actually very close to an ambient video installation and could be considered game art. 

4. Turn based strategy games 

Games my brain enjoys the most. I get satisfaction from solving. Solving concrete situations of strategy games is closer to me than abstract puzzles and logic games in general. Into the Breach is close to the latter in terms of mechanics but I love it, because it’s not cold, it makes me feel and every time I fail and an enemy hits one of the cities, I stop breathing for a moment. It makes me feel heroic to put one of my mechs in front of houses and almost sacrifice its pilot to save those lives.

There’s a huge influence of Heroes of Might and Magic. That game has many flaws, but its pace is perfect. Battles are usually either swift of epic. Heroes were my first love and I still fondly return to them from time to time. They’re not as challenging or complex as most tactics/strategy games, but they’re perfect rewarding fun. I only left them as my default turn based strategy to branch out. Series like Civilization and Warlock are building more consistent worlds. Especially in Civ its super fast turns and ties to the real world’s history make it a captivating game, in which you need to strategize on several fronts at once. Tactics are the second path I currently follow. There are closer to RPGs, but for reason your characters becoming stronger makes more sense here. It’s often because you can lose them and losing a level 10 character hurts more. I enjoy the small scale of tactics games too. The smaller the better. Again it’s a game design challenge of going further without sacrificing complexity.

5. Grand strategy games

I wonder how longer this one sticks. I love engrossing myself in Paradox games, losing track of real for weeks and becoming weirdo obsessed with my own history of the world. But it’s weird and disconnecting and you can’t talk about it with your friends, because explaining it is impossible. You can share some stories with fellow grand strategy players, but it’s not difficult to realize the weird nerdness of the company.

So, what’s so good about them? They simulate politics on a world-wide level with an amount of realism, which just feels right. You can change history, but only within borders set up by Paradox. For example you can conquer France as an Aztec, but it stays France. Shapes are the same, systems too. This shade of reality makes fiction in Crusader Kings, Europa Universalis, Victoria and other games much more easy to engage with. That’s also why I find Stellaris boring. Leaving reality, there’s nothing to compare your fiction with. It renders my choices irrelevant and different developments have same impact on me. Multiplayer probably changes this.

Civilization is far less complex than grand strategy games. It’s simple and easy to explain and to change. Yet it keeps certain connection to the real world and it has great modding scene. There isn’t an infinite number of expansions for it, which would make it bloated with features. And one run lasts a lot less. Civ isn’t a simulation, it’s still a very long puzzle. One day, I will only stick with one of the two. Now It looks better for Sid Mayer than Paradox.

Pictures are from following games: Caged Bird Dont Fly Caught in a Wire Sing Like a Good Canary Come When Called, Gunmetal Arcadia, Mura Toka (1 and 2), Morphblade, Victoria 2

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Stephen Markley's Playlist for His Novel "Ohio"

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Stephen Markley's Playlist for His Novel "Ohio"

In the Book Notes series, authors create and discuss a music playlist that relates in some way to their recently published book.

Previous contributors include Jesmyn Ward, Lauren Groff, Bret Easton Ellis, Celeste Ng, T.C. Boyle, Dana Spiotta, Amy Bloom, Aimee Bender, Heidi Julavits, Hari Kunzru, and many others.

Stephen Markley's novel Ohio is a powerful and timely debut.

NPR Books wrote of the book:

"Ohio isn't just a remarkable debut novel, it's a wild, angry and devastating masterpiece of a book. Markley's debut is a sprawling, beautiful novel that explores the aftermath of the Great Recession and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and a powerful look at the tenuous bonds that hold people together at their best and at their worst. [Ohio] is intricately constructed, with gorgeous, fiery writing that pulls the reader in and never lets go."

In his own words, here is Stephen Markley's Book Notes music playlist for his debut novel Ohio:

If I had to accuse myself of something it would be scattershot musical tastes over the course of a scattershot life. I forget how I encounter any given song or artist other than generally standing mid-stream of pop culture and trying to occasionally wade over to the fringes; I'm now almost always at the mercy of Spotify's algorithms because I don't take the time to seek anything out; I still have my entire massive book of CDs from high school, which is mostly 90s rap (Drag-On's Opposite of H20 anyone?). I can't really recall what I was listening to while writing the novel Ohio, but here's a list of what seems to have crept through my subconscious, possibly eking into the text in unexpected ways.

"The Stable Song" Gregory Alan Isakov

I've occasionally described Ohio as a ghost story where the ghost never appears (a designation I'm pretty sure I stole from Stephen King), but the novel is about being haunted--by people you've lost, decisions you've made, friendships you've forsaken. The characters each return to their hometown on the same night, and they all have on their minds and in their hearts something they've lost. This song, for me, always captured the essence of what I was trying to bring to the page, a sense of having drifted your whole life, but also having never truly left this one person, place, or moment.

"All Things To All Men" The Cinematic Orchestra, Roots Manuva

I stumbled across this due to the aforementioned Spotify algorithm, and I always pictured one character in particular, Bill Ashcraft, this drug-addled, alcoholic political activist cruising along to this song as he trips out of his head on LSD. It's a long, dense song that makes you feel like you're stumbling down a street corner at night, half-drunk, but with sudden vivid insight into the absurd joke of the political, social, and economic quagmire that is the American experience.

"Same Drugs" Chance the Rapper

I've heard people accuse this song of being schmaltzy, but if that's the case I gladly embrace it. I taught this to my students when we did a class on narratives in pop music because it's such a lovely, compressed, and efficient story about growing past another person and the nostalgia you feel for the bond that once existed between you. It has these little whimsical phrases evoking Peter Pan: "You must have lost your marbles"; "when did you start to forget how to fly"; "don't forget the happy thoughts;" "When everything we read was real and everything we said rhymed." It casts this whimsical note over our collective substance abuse, that you can only ever make it with someone if your tastes in self-medication align, and once that moment passes it can change everything between two people.

"Carry Me Ohio" Mark Kozelek

This one for obvious reasons, plus it namechecks rivers and landmarks I'm all too aware of from growing up in the area. Actually, I went through a number of titles for the novel before settling on simplicity for simplicity's sake, but this song sort of wakes you up to the poetry of that single word. It has something to do with the way your mouth moves when you say it, your lips going vertical, horizontal, vertical in rapid succession, and each sound is its own lost spirit.

"Darkness On the Edge of Town" Bruce Springsteen

A young woman once said to me, "I don't believe anyone can truly be a bad person if they love Bruce." That seems extreme, but I've never seen it proved wrong. People who only know Bruce from the big hits are missing a religious conversion in their lives. It's his darker stuff I've always been drawn to, and as a teenager dealing with the death of one of my closest friends, I found the most surprising respite in his music, which I basically listened to nonstop from 2000 until 2005. I love that he's this short story writer in a rock star's body and so many people across so many different classes, age groups, races, genders, and life paths see themselves in the tales dreamed up by this ratty-bearded kid from industrial New Jersey. "Darkness" was the first song of his I heard that made me sit up like, "What in the fuck is this?" Like many of Springsteen narrators, the guy in the song is wandering through his place in post-industrial America. He's keeping secrets, he's lost the woman he loves through some fault of his own, he remains defiant. Just play this and "Promised Land" at my funeral, please.

"All That You Have Is Your Soul" Tracy Chapman

During the gestation period of this novel I was hanging out with a young woman in my apartment and this song came on. She said something like, "Were you also a teenage girl crying with her friends at sleepaway camp in the early Nineties?" All I know is that as a guy trying to start for his high school basketball team in rural Ohio, I had to keep somewhat secret my abject love for Tracy Chapman and her brazenly unironic, head-melting tunes on justice, race, love, and loss. When writing the character of Stacey Moore, I had Chapman and that young woman in mind, because that night she said something else I really liked: "Sure, all you have is your soul, but we should all take at least a little bite of that shiny apple every now and then."

"Shelter From the Storm" Bob Dylan

This song has been sort of wrecked by its overuse as an anthem of the Baby Boomers' (see Cameron Crowe stuffing it into the end of Jerry McGuire), but Dylan remains, IMHO, simply one of the most mesmerizing writers of the Twentieth Century. I laughed and laughed at the literary world's hand-wringing after his Nobel win, and I laughed twice as hard when he plagiarized parts of his Nobel acceptance speech from Cliff's Notes, but it was nevertheless one of the most beautiful explications of what the journey of art, of literature, of creation actually feels like in the most tactile, heart-rending sense. Dylan is this utterly irascible, trickster figure, who will always defy and mystify his fans and critics. "Shelter From the Storm" describes the ramble we're all one, this bizarre, unhinged journey that never ends where you think it will, and maybe the one or two or seven people you meet along the way who are like, "All right, get in here. We'll make love and then go throw rocks at the trains passing in the night."

"Chonkyfire" Outkast

This is the final song on Aquemini, and it probably wouldn't make the top fifty in most fans' estimation of Outkast songs, but there's something inexplicable about the sound it creates. It's epic, it's full-throated, it's apocalyptic. My affinity for Nineties hip-hop mostly rests on the fact that that was the age I discovered this wild, uninhibited act of rebellion in musical form. I tended more towards the political or the lyrically interesting, but discovering Outkast, particularly Aquemini with Rosa Parks, SpottieOttieDopaliscious, and this final mind-blowing track--it felt like Indiana Jones figuring out the Grail was just these two guys from Atlanta.

"I Do My Father's Drugs" Joe Pug

Joe Pug's music served as something of a basis for the career of the character Ben Harrington, and I think he's one of the most underrated singer-songwriters alive. "My Father's Drugs" is one of his masterpieces, and though careful readers may be questioning my affinity for songs about drugs, this is really more about the cyclical nature of generations attempting to upend the status quo, of trying and failing, desperately, to change the conditions that have isolated, weakened, and demoralized us. It reminds me of protesting Dick Cheney's appearance at a Cleveland church in 2004.

"City of Refuge" Abigail Washburn

Abigail Washburn is one of those musicians you're almost afraid to tell anyone about because you want to selfishly hoard her honey and cigarettes voice for yourself. I don't even recall how I stumbled across 2011's City of Refuge, but it's one of my favorite albums of the decade. The title song and "Last Train" in particular always call to mind, for whatever reason, all the errant, directionless wandering of my mid-twenties, and that wanderlust definitely found its place within several characters of the novel.

"Youngstown" Bruce Springsteen

The original version on The Ghost of Tom Joad is, without a doubt, a masterpiece, but you really haven't heard "Youngstown" until you've heard him perform it live, say in Cleveland, Ohio, circa 2004 (same weekend as when I went to protest Cheney; sometimes the stars just align). When it's born into the world as a true rock song, it has a power and anger that the album version doesn't. It's not just that it's a story set in my corner of the world or that it so bitterly and accurately describes the sense of having the floorboards of your life and livelihood ripped out from beneath you a plank at a time by powers you don't control and men you'll never meet, but it bears a truly radical message. The narrator sings, "My daddy come on the Ohio Works when he come home from World War II/ Now the yard's just scrap and rubble/ He said, 'Them big boys did what Hitler couldn't do.'" I mean, Jesus Christ, talk about taking a full swing at the skull of the neoliberal order. What I love most about the song is its scope, traversing the history of a place from 1803 to the modern moment, watching the smokestacks rise and billow and then go clear. You can smell the coke and limestone, you can feel the rain coming down as the characters wander the scrapyard. It's a remarkable piece of literature and speaks to a universal story of exploitation that keeps repeating itself over and over again. How the story's always the same. It was that sense of history and fury and defiance that I always wanted to imbue this book with.

"Elevation" Hildur Guonadottir

The first civilian I gave the book to (someone outside of the long editorial process) claimed she read it in three days and was listening to this song as she blew through the final pages. It produced, she said, a pretty fantastic effect. Once I listened to the song, I honestly couldn't agree with her more. Very spooky.

Stephen Markley and Ohio links:

the author's website

Minneapolis Star Tribune review NPR Books review Wall Street Journal review Washington Post review

Ohio Magazine interview with the author Publishers Weekly profile of the author

also at Largehearted Boy:

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