#some of them are assholes some of them are weirdos
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springholly · 3 days ago
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Part 1
More Mouthwashing Alien AU? Maybe.
This is the very first sketch I made for it:
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The first sketch of the crew:
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- Just some simple headshots, trying to get the feel for the characters.
- I kind of wish I had kept Curly's longer hair to go with the late 70s aesthetic. Also, Anya is supposed to have a Ripley esque early 80s perm, that is why her hair is so big.
- These were done without reference so that's why some of them are a bit unclear as to who they are supposed to represent in the story of Alien.
More Anya:
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- Flamethrowers are a pain to draw.😔
The aftermath of the chestbursting:
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- I really enjoy how Curly's corpse turned out in the fourth panel. I've never drawn a character from that angle before.
How the facehugger impregnation was supposed to go:
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- I originally wanted Jimmy to cause Curly's infection to parallel him causing the crash. It would've been an intentional act that would've incapacitated Curly from the story just like in Mouthwashing.
- I however realized that the facehuggers don't exactly cause memory loss (don't believe even Curly is a big enough doormat to let that one slide)
and that Ash (Jimmy's parallel in Alien) wasn't out with the others investigating the signal.
- Thus, I decided to scrap it.
AU infodump:
- The characters are still space freighters working for Pony Express. (Yes, Polle the cat is a company provided luxury. Of course he'd be named Polle.)
- The characters still retain their personalities, for example, Anya isn't as outspoken and headstrong as Ripley, she's more stoic. And Jimmy is still the same demeaning asshole, not a sly british weirdo like Ash.
- Slight dialogue changes to fit the characters' voices better.
- Unlike in the film, Ash (Jimmy) isn't the last minute newcomer, instead it's still Daisuke (Brett). I wanted Jimmy to have the status of being Curly's best friend for plot reasons.
- The ship the crew are in is still called the Tulpar, but it's interior aesthetics follow the retro-futuristic look of the Nostromo.
- In this AU Pony Express has gone under far before the crew is informed about it. Of course, it has been bought out by Weyland-Yutani, and Jimmy has been programmed to join the crew and get into the captain's good graces.
- Weyland-Yutani know about the xenomorphs and want to study them, the crew is to be possibly sacrificed to retrieve the necessary info.
- The crew find the alien signal coming from LV-426.
- Curly is hesitant to approach due to possible danger.
- Jimmy appeals to the fact of them all losing their jobs anyways. Maybe whatever they find could prove to be a big payday?
- Curly yields to make Jimmy happy, thus dooming them all. They go and investigate.
- Curly gets facehugged and falls into a coma, the others (Daisuke and Swansea) want to bring him back in but Anya (like Ripley) wants to uphold the quarantine protocol.
- Jimmy (like Ash) breaks the protocol, putting them all in danger but appearing as a hero to the others.
- The same stuff happens. They study it: acid blood? Yikes! We are not getting that thing off Curly's face.
- It falls off on it's own, dead. Curly wakes up, all's well that ends well. Except for when he begins convulsing at the breakfast table and then promptly births a chestburster right from between his lungs.
- Panic ensues. At some point Jimmy deems the others too much of a danger for the mission and (for a few other reasons too) tries to kill Anya. Swansea saves the day and accidentally severs Jimmy's head.
- Turns out he's an android! They plug his severed head back online and learn what his mission was all along.
- Fuck that guy, we're blowing up the ship.
- Scratch that, Anya is blowing up the ship because everyone else dies.
- Our final girl escapes with the cat and all's well that ends well.🎉🎉🎉
Take a breather, I know that was a lot. I will write some more for this later, going more into the characters themselves and their relationships.
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solarballs-confessions · 2 days ago
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In the new episodes, everyone is talking about Planet X being an asshole, or Uranus being manipulated. But no one is talking about Neptune being actually kinda fucking depressed. Like, he’s losing his best friend because Uranus wants to have a “better life” or some shit. Don’t get me wrong I don’t blame Uranus for his actions, if I had a name that literally meant “asshole” I’d wanna change it too, but the way he’s trying to do it is making him drift away from Neptune. Uranus is willing to put the whole solar system in the risk just so that he doesn’t get made fun of anymore and that people can acknowledge his existence, but Neptune can see that it’s not worth it, and this puts their friendship in risk.
In the new episodes, Neptune, despite loving (Platonically) and caring for Uranus, he never acknowledges his new name choice, he always calls him “Uranus”. I feel like it’s not just because he’s used to the name, but also because he sees Caelus as a different planet, in Neptunes eyes, Uranus and Caelus are two separate celestial bodies. One of them is caring, and will be best friends with Neptune and no matter how weird he is, and the other is selfish, does only what’s best for himself, and sees Neptune to be a weirdo. In Battle of Planet X Part 1, when Neptune tries to go over to Uranus, you can obviously tell that when Uranus refuses to come over to hang with the other planets, that Neptune is sad as fuck about it, he just wants Uranus to be his friend again. You can obviously hear Neptunes misery when he says “okay.. mate?”.
HE IS FUCKING DEPRESSED! And when the next episodes come out, I bet he’s going to be even more depressed and sad. And can you blame him? If you’re best friend, whom you have known for years upon years, leaves you for someone else, acts like a whole new different person, and treats you like you’re the weirdest person ever, YOU WOULD BE DEPRESSED TOO! I think that Neptune is actually the smart one in this situation, he knows that Uranus isn’t just doing this for a “new name” or whatever, but it’s also partly for revenge against how all the other planets treated him, Neptune saw right through him. Neptune knows that even though if X wins, it will largely benefit him, but at the cost of all the Rocky planets and Jupiter’s and Saturn’s sanity. He honestly doesn’t give a fuck if he is smart or dumb or whatever, he just wants the others to be happy and safe. Neptune genuinely cares about the other planets, and would give up any opportunity to make himself happier just for them to be safe. Yet Uranus is the opposite right now, he would do ANYTHING to be even a little bit better off in the solar system, He doesn’t care if the Rocky planets lives are at stake or if people are losing their mind, he wants what’s best for himself. And this is tearing their friendship apart.
I genuinely hope that in the future episodes that they become friends again, these two are the best duo ever! (Or at least they were…) I hope that Uranus realizes that it’s not right to put others safety at risk just so you’re happier, I feel like that if he had this realization, he and Neptunes relationship would be fixed, and Neptune would be not depressed. I’m honestly really excited to see where all this will be headed in the next few episodes, and I just hope that Uranus gets his shit together and realizes that he doesn’t need a new name and orbit to be happy. WE NEED THESE 2 BLUEBERRIES TO BE BESTIES AGAIN!!!
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salutethesargeant · 14 days ago
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Nah I'm sorry but the pregnancy announcement after George confirmed that Max said that he would smash his head against a wall. No one is gonna say anything bad about a father to be. That was such a perfect PR move.
And it's marketable. Baby merch immediately popped up on his site after. I've physically seen people excuse his threat towards George (which under no circumstances would ever be normal?? even if anyone else said it) to get all cheerful (called it 'alright' because he's 'morally grey' ?? that's a real human being, not a fictional character) about the baby and also using it to defend Kelly too. (I'm not going in that rabbit hole more, but she doesn't deserve defense or a fanbase)
Does everyone fall for pr that easily? Apparently so. Average F1 fan sucks up to the worst type of (European) man so easily and falls deep for their curated, predatory parasocial relationships. Media training, media acting (DTS), fandom-curated content, and rpf have you all acting like everything is a movie. Like everything is fine and sunshine.
Holy shit I need a breather.
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musubiki · 1 year ago
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tiny limochi appriciation
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just-an-enby-lemon · 1 year ago
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Somedays I just go back to my silly idea of writing a fic where Scarecrow kidnaps Jonathan Sims during Sims visit to america - prefencially after Jon was already kidnaped by Trevor and Julia (everyone can abduct Jonathan Sims with very little effort).
Now I have a lot of reasons for that but mostly Jonny Crane deserves to know the world is controlled by fear entities and that he can even join one (or more since the division is rather arbitrary) and I NEED to write an universe where Elias can just contact Batman but doesn't until he realizes he might just lose the whole archive and a bit less the staff (except for Tim but at this point Tim barely counts as an employe for how little work he does) since Martin accidentaly discovered Jon was kidnapped AGAIN and Elias was hiding it AGAIN so now he, Georgie and Basira are making a questionable rescue plan and Daisy and Melanie begrundgly join for their girlfriends sake.
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marypsue · 2 years ago
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If I were lucky enough to attract a loyal following of goths, I would simply not slag off the subculture in interviews in a desperate and pathetic attempt to get the mainstream to consider me a real artist. RIP to every musician goths have ever loved but I'm different.
#apparently the mark of a True goth musician is to react with horror and contempt to the whole idea of being associated with - ew - GOTHS#like seriously. these people support your artistic endeavours both financially and through word of mouth#even when you're consistently just the hugest asshole to them in public#goths are some of the most loyal enthusiastic and appreciative fans you can have#especially if what you make is at all 'weird'#if you're really so worried about appearing creatively bankrupt you should worry more about putting down your core fanbase of weirdos#to try to look aloof and smart and ~unique~ and ~artistic~ to an audience that won't appreciate you#because they've already pigeonholed you as 'one of THOSE freaks'#'oh but nooooo the goth scene is too samey-samey and full of slavish followers' like...most large categories of people?#if it bugs you so damn much that there's so little variation (hah!) in goth tho#then maybe try taking the position it's offering you on a silver platter and steering it in new and interesting directions?#adding some diversity to the aesthetic and artistic gene pool?#instead of just bitching and pissing and moaning about the mainstream not thinking you're a ~unique creative individual~?#...unless maybe you don't actually have anything new or creative or original to offer???#and doth merely protest too much??????#anyway we should all be so lucky as to attract a loyal following of goths#this is a rant that's been brewing for a LONG time#andrew eldritch do not interact
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unnerving-presence · 1 year ago
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sometimes i get slightly annoyed that wesker isn’t popular on re tik tok but then i remember tik tok leon fans exist and i thank the lord they haven’t gotten their hands on wesker yet
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devotion-disorder · 2 years ago
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at work trapped in a room with coworkers that ive only had tangential contact with im this close to biting my tongue off to unalive myself
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theprinceandthewitch · 2 years ago
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What I love about Bad Little Boy is that it's a character episode centered on Marceline. We get to see how she views herself, Finn and her relationship with him, a little bit of her relationship with PB and we even get to see how she views Finn's and PB's "friendship". [She was completely right about Finn's and PB's relationship.]
Oh and that we get confirmation Marceline is a whole ass bisexual, because Bad Little Boy is clearly about her feelings for Finn. [Say what you will about that. I'm taking whatever bisexual representation I can get]
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snekdood · 2 months ago
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nigel would have been so fucking mad, but more than that- so fucking disappointed in you if he was still alive, jake.
#i hope the guilt of hurting all the black people you know in your life haunts you till you rot.#the fact you think its okay to be the pos bigot you are now is bc all you ever got for what you did to me was a slap on the wrist.#too many people let you get by with doing too much fucking shit.#i hope you jump off a cliff atp. im tired of holding out hope for your decency as a human. ik you dont have it.#even as a kid you were talking about how you know how to manipulate women to get your way. that alone tells me everything about#how you think. you dont care about shit. you never cared about your black friends.#it was all for clout. and now that you're not in school anymore you dont have to keep pretending to care bc you dont need the clout#anymore. everything you ever fucking did was for clout.#if you really cared about me like you pretend to why did you act like i was inherently defective? why did you act like i was gross and#weird? why did you convince everyone i was lame but to 'tolerate me' when you could have just presented me normally without shitting on me#and even still- in spite of your efforts to convince your friends that im some gross weirdo they should avoid and only tolerate-#two of them still wanted to fuck. so.#the reason you present me as below you is because of the clout. you know im nicer than you. you know i dont have to rely on being#an asshole bigot to be funny like you. you know i actually have some fucking talent- so you gotta act like theres something inherently#wrong with me to put me below you bc god forbid anyone threaten the status of your self erected pedestal you stand on.#im not the reason you have no talents or hobbies. i literally gave you my electric piano bc i thought you actually cared about shit for#once but no- you did THAT for clout too. you're such a fucking narcissist its so painfully obvious.
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probablybadrpgideas · 8 months ago
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Number of Goblins, ranked
One Goblin - That's just a goblin. He's probably just getting his groceries or something. Leave him alone, you asshole.
Ten Goblins -- That's a fairly normal amount of goblins. There's generally around ten goblins in any given situations. They're just here for aesthetic, so you know it's a fantasy world. Remember to tip them when you leave.
One Hundred Goblins -- Ok this is too many goblins, but this is a reasonable amount of too many goblins. Like, this is maybe an army of goblins or something? My point is that they're probably here for a good reason. Best not to mess with them, they're likely load-bearing in some way.
One Thousand Goblins -- This is probably a goblin town, in which case this is really more a case of One Human, which is a completely different list only available on goblintube. If not, all these goblins are lost. Return them to the goblin town. The orcs are worried.
One Million Goblins -- A million goblins? I'm not sure I've even seen a million things in my life , and now there's a million goblins? That's, like, all the goblins. Why are you at a convention of all the goblins? Are you a goblin? Actually, no, that would make sense. Yeah, that's probably what's going on here. Sorry you had to find out this way.
One Billion Goblins -- Ok, look, at this point you have clearly been sent to a future time where humanity is extinct and goblins have inherited the earth. I can think of no other explanation for a billion goblins. This sadly means that you're the weirdo, and you have to go be a cryptid now. At least you can find a phone and read the goblin creepypastas about you.
One Trillion Goblins -- How? What is happening? This is more goblins then there are birds, and they'll all in your house? How is your house this big? Wait, forget the goblins, how is your house this big? Are the goblins here to guillotine you? Probably! Move out of your stupid mansion and let the goblins have it, you weird rich bird-hoarding freak.
One Quadrillion Goblins -- One quadrillion? I'm only like 80% sure that's even a real number! Luckily, you won't have to deal with a quadrillion goblins for long, because soon they'll collapse together under their gravity, forming a far more manageable single planet-sized goblin. Picard's not gonna be happy about this one!
More Goblins -- Fuck off, you do not have more then a quadrillion goblins. Why are you lying? Are you worried I won't like you if you don't claim to have an implausible number of goblins? Don't worry. Your worth is not dependent on your goblin numbers. Go back to the actual number of goblins secure in the fact I love you, no matter how few goblins you have <3
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leatherbookmark · 1 year ago
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was all \( ̄︶ ̄*\)) about poasting on a kpop community on dw, but then i noticed an introduction post! yay! i love introduction posts! except oops, you gotta introduce yourself with a name, like normal people do. stressing
#shrimp thoughts#so this might be a shock to some. but shrimp is not what i'd consider a name. it's like a jokey nickname that i started to use towards#myself and then just went along w/ it. i COULD crowdsource but i'm incredibly picky and i don't want people to feel bad#i also could yknow just come up w/ something on my own but what's the guarantee that i won't grow to dislike it/feel that it's not “mine”#anymore. i'm your typical overly sensitive shy kid irl so when i tried going by eliza in uni it was like one teacher makes a face -> i get#self-conscious about being the only weirdo who doesn't go by their given name like a normal person -> when people naturally get confused#or call me by my given name i'm hurt but correcting them feels like an asshole thing to do so i don't (until i do something extra like#ignoring when someone calls me by my given name and going 'did you mean me? that's not my name >:/') AND SO i'm just scared that#people will see the glaring red HIGH-MAINTENANCE AND SELF-OBSESSED neon sign floating above my head if i pick another name#after having made All This Fuss already. even though no one here knows me irl so. yeah#talking about yourself in terms of who you are and how do you want people to refer to you is so embarrassing#like telling them “lies” feels -- again -- high-maintenance and self-obsessed but while i'm fine w/ family/old friends calling me by my#given name i Would Rather Not actively introduce myself with it if possible... ach! such is life.
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signedsfs · 3 months ago
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I've got some great fuckin news
Once again got a bee in my bonnet to spend a night doing obscure fandom research to make a point, so. For all those people who keep making the annoying, "Tim keeps '''stealing'' other peoples' names" comments -- have a table.
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Everyone with a check mark has used that codename at some point in DC's 80+ year continuity -- Elseworlds and alternate dimensions/timelines count, adaptations (movies, video games, cartoons, etc.) don't unless they've got comic book tie-ins, and neither do in-universe dream sequences/illusions/fantasies/other narrative elements that are objectively "not real" within the boundaries of the fiction.
A purple marker indicates an element that only applies in Elseworlds or alternate timelines. Yellow is for the originator of the legacy title. Star symbol is for borderline cases/extenuating circumstances/it's open to interpretation (with some further elaboration below).
The "other" column is just there to account for people who've held lesser or non-legacy titles, like Renegade, Wingman, Arkham Knight, Drake, Redbird, Talon, Deadman, Black Bat, Orphan and Catwoman.
Point being: the people who have actually gone through the most legacy titles in this family are Dick, Babs and Jason, tied with 5 each (again, not counting "other;" if we counted those separately Dick would've had by far the most). Tim is tied with Steph AND Helena Wayne, so unless you're whining about them "stealing other peoples' names" you're just wrong, and they're all only one higher than Damian, Carrie and Bruce.
This is a legacy family that passes their codenames up and down the inheritance line. It's what they do. It's not a legitimate criticism to level at one character and not the others. Please get over it.
EDIT: I realize after posting this that I missed some colors on the table, mostly with Babs' Elseworld only roles (Batwoman and Nightwing) but I'm too tired to go back and correct them; refer to the info below for more details.
---
Further elaboration on some of the lesser known/niche cases:
- Bruce uses the Robin ID in Superman & Batman: Generations
- In the second half of Thrillkiller ‘62, Babs cuts her hair and dons the Robin costume worn by her deceased partner Dick to get revenge on his killer; however the only name ever used for her in the series is Batgirl
- Cassandra was a member of the Robins orphan gang from Dark Knights of Steel.
- Duke was a member of the We Are Robins gang, as well as the aforementioned DKS orphan gang, and has appeared as Robin in a couple of Elseworlds, including I believe a White Knight spin-off.
- Cass was Batwoman in one of the versions of the Titans Tomorrow, as was Bette Kane, depending on changes to the timeline.
- Babs is Batwoman in the Batman ‘66 comics and in the 1980 story “The Secret Origin of Bruce (Superman) Wayne”
- Earth-3 Steph is Batwoman in Young Justice 2019.
- Helena Wayne is Batwoman in the possible future story Last Rites
- Tim is a member of the Batgirls vigilante/little league baseball team in the DC Bombshells universe, as is Cullen Row. Some call them the “Batboys” instead. I call those people cowards.
- Helena Bertinelli wore the costume that would later become Cass’s signature Batgirl look during No Man’s Land. However, she was more often referred to as “The Bat” and her Batgirl status is up to individual interpretation.
- Dick didn’t originate the Nightwing name, it started with Clark in the Silver Age.
- Steph has never been Nightwing. The panel where she appears in the costume is a Black Mercy illusion that happens only in her own mind. It’s a dream sequence.
- Barbara was Nightwing in the Smallville Season 11 comics.
- Terry was briefly Nightwing in volume 4 of Batman Beyond.
- Damian briefly became Nightwing after accidentally killing Dick in the Injustice series.
- Dick is Oracle in the “Eight Wonders of the World” version of Earth 2 (aka the Black Superman dimension)
#batrant#I don't have to rant just to drop a great fic link but....the original post#in this house we love....tables. we love graphs. we love data and facts and autism#anyway becoming a Tim Drake fan is the worst thing that's ever happened to me send help#how come when other characters get misinterpreted they get Benefits or at least Shallow But Positive Caricatures#but I get 'tim is boring he's just there he doesn't do anything'#'tim is just a sexist asshole he's not even that good' 'tim is so pathetic he has beef with a 9 year old for literally no reason'#'tim is incapable of doing anything ever' 'tim is just a tiny bruce (derogatory)' 'tim deserves Every Bad Thing actually'#'tim is overrated' (where???) 'I see him everywhere' (sHOW ME WHERE...I WANT TO LIVE THERE) 'they make him too perfect' (I DOUBT IT)#'they make everyone coddle him' (maybe he Deserves It after getting Decades of NO CODDLING AT ALL)#'he doesn't have a Thing' (bitch he IS the thing) 'he stole everything from Dick' (Dick also 'Stole' shit from Tim#Robins literally share so much shit across media that some people don't know there's more than one)#(...cannot believe I read with my own eyes that DICK was the first Robin with pants.....IN KINGDOM COME.)#side note: Tim started calling his shit Redname BEFORE Dick became Red Robin. so I've decided that shit was always meant to be his :)#side side note: DAMIAN GOT NAMED AFTER TIM'S FUCKING CAR BUT WHO'S TALKING ABOUT THAT???#people think Tim's a self-insert but he has.....traits that are. definitely not something you would give a normal blank self-insert#like even from his Intro...were most comic readers little stalker freaks that wanted to travel alone to a hero's civilian home???#little weirdos that wanted to watch their heroes with binoculars?? and break into their old apartment to look for clues and steal shit??#did readers want to be the first and only Explicitly Unwanted But 'Needed' Robin that Defined just how Bad everyone was doing??#did they beg to be parentified and made responsible for grownass adults' violent outbursts despite not being Trapped in the situation???#were readers inserting themselves on That???? Tim sometimes has relatable shit Happen To Him but his Reactions.....#he is not a blank self-insert. he is not there to have a good cathartic time. he's there to suffer and be a punching bag.#also...I know it's Fanon that Tim stalked them Nightly (a fanon I will Always engage with god bless) but like#he Did get Concerningly Clear Close-ups of a Fast-Paced Fight for his 'first time'. he Did have info that he couldn't get from the news.#he Did have a concerning amount of ease with crossing state lines alone to 'follow' Dick Grayson.#and he was sure fuckin quick on that shutter button for someone who had No interest in photography/Never Once stalked his heroes up close.#I don't necessarily think he got rescued by Jason or eavesdropped on a bunch of important events or anything but like...I just think.#he lived in Multiple Residences within Gotham. not in Bristol. he didn't have to bike anywhere to see them. I'm just fuckin saying.
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crookedteethed · 2 months ago
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18+ slight smut (unprotected piv), sex tapes, mentions of anal, jealous!reader, weirdo behavior
⋆ ★ thinking about how dad!rafe constantly gets hit on by slutty moms and how you have to come in and set them straight : (
Rafe loved his baby girl, but he would bash his fist into the wall if he had to listen to Somewhere Over the Rainbow get played as he watched his little girl prance around in her ballet class one more time. 
Don't get him wrong, Rafe loved spending the daddy-daughter time with his little girl, and it was something (even more) persuasive about your daughter wearing an adorable pink tutu that made him agree to get ice cream after Every. Single. Class.
It was the other parents (and The Best of Oz) who made it so insufferable—not just the other parents—the moms. 
The dads were particularly cool. They typically sat there like Rafe, hunched over into a man's spread, aggressively typing on their phones. 
But the moms--no--the fucking moms always wanted to talk, but not just talk, flirt!
The moms were like cougars, always purposely sitting down next to Rafe, peering over his shoulder, debating whether they should talk to him. 
When they finally do muster enough courage to talk to him (the ones that do), they typically say some dumb shit, like: 
"My heart always goes out to single fathers; it does. I’m single, too. We should grab a drink sometime.”
It was only Cynthia Fucking Allen that asked Rafe dumb shit like this. 
It was dumb because she knew that Rafe wasn't a single father and knew well that you two were happily married. 
The other moms were never as Bold as Cynthia. They typically just tried to talk with Rafe to talk to someone as attractive as he was—which Rafe didn't mind.
Cynthia was a cougar because she didn't fear rejection. She'd never turn down an opportunity to make a pass at Rafe--whether it was inviting him over to dinner or trying to set up "supervised playdates” (which Rafe had always turned her down) or going as far as complimenting his derrière in his khakis.
And though Cynthia's constant badgering was becoming a nuisance to Rafe, Rafe never needed to cut into Cynthia because deep down, Rafe had felt bad for the woman.
Rafe had once heard from you, who heard from one of the other mothers that Mr. Allen, Cynthia's husband, had filed for a divorce. So maybe she was just trying to get her groove back or something, Rafe thought.
Shockingly, you were the one to snap and cut into Cynthia for her nuisance behavior, finally. 
It was a stupid and risky idea, and you don't know what had come over you, honestly. It was something the Queen Bee would do in a raunchy teen movie. 
You had sent Cynthia a video of Rafe full-on fucking you. 
And I mean, you went all out. A tripod was set up and everything. 
It was an 11-minute length video of Rafe fucking you in two positions. 
For five minutes straight, Rafe took you from behind--your plush ass dangling off the edge of the bed as Rafe pounded into your sopping loud cunt, standing up, with his thumb occasionally pressing into your asshole.
With each thrust from Rafe's hips was met with your ass, causing the skin-on-skin slapping to fill the room. 
And then for another five minutes, he fucked you in missionary--with your legs pressed to his sides, Rafe sucking and biting your neck and cursing in your ear about how this is "Your dick."
You had made sure to include a minute of Rafe jacking off and cumming on the folds of your pussy and onto your clit. Then, you told Rafe to hurry up and grab the phone and record him fucking his cum deep inside of you because you were the only one indeed that owned Rafe's cock, and seemingly Cynthia needed to be reminded of that.
When you sent the video to Cynthia, you set it on vanishing mode and made sure it was to be deleted as soon as she finished watching it, so if she ever mentioned it, it was her word against yours.
You never told Rafe about sending Cynthia your sex tape, and Cynthia never brought it up, but you knew she had gotten the message since she never bothered Rafe again afterwards.
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I am not the asshole, and I think this whole thing is stupid, but I was promised that if I sent my side of things to this blog I could pick the hotel for our honeymoon, and I am marrying a man who once tried to take me BACKPACKING of all things, so this ask has become a necessity. In light of that:
AITA (I'm NOT) for planning the seating for our wedding in a logical way?
I got engaged in June, apparently in part because of my partner writing in to this blog (I don't know how to find or link to his posts, but I'm the man who got the cat to bite him, if that rings any bells?). At any rate, for the past ten weeks, I've been in the beginning stages of planning our wedding with my fiance, whom I have been secretly attempting to remove from the planning process as much as possible. I have ALREADY been given a list of his must-haves, and I AM incorporating as many of them as our budget allows. This has NOTHING to do with the emotional side of the event, and EVERYTHING to do with the fact that this is an idiot with no real planning experience or taste who thinks he knows more than me.
For the most part, this has worked very well. I'm the one who's been collating all the contact information for things, so I just replaced all the emails for the tacky companies with false addresses, responded to his inquiries as the companies to say the date was already booked or the price was outside our budget, and let him filter his way to the ones I DO like on his own. I also made a fuss about being "willing to compromise" on the few things he's picked I'm completely fine with in the hopes I can use it to make him compromise later, and have been humming portions of the songs I want on the playlist in the hopes he'll think he came up with the idea to include them himself.
None of this is the real problem. The PROBLEM is that he is deliberately ruining my seating chart, by moving our horrible friend's seat when I'm not looking.
The man in question dated both of us at one point in our VERY early 20s (both ended BADLY), is generally the messiest person we know, and will almost certainly get sloppy drunk and try to make a speech IF he does make an appearance. I'm banking on the fact that he won't, because he's also ridiculously wealthy, and will almost certainly send us some very lavish gift in lieu of coming.
He is SUPPOSED to be sitting beside my fiances aunt, at the same table as his grandmother, his work friend, and her girlfriend, because all four of these women are stone cold terrors who I believe are more than capable of keeping him in line on the slim chance he does come. My fiance INSISTS they won't be able to have any fun if they're running interference all night, and keeps moving him to sit at the head table instead. You know, where WE are. I finally caught him switching the label magnets on my planning board last night, and confronted him.
I tried leveraging how much I've been compromising already, that he's almost certainly going to RSVP no, and that I shouldn't have to deal with him on our big night. My fiance said he knew about all the fake emailing and such, and told me, and I QUOTE: "Look, the mind game shit was hot when it was just about the colour scheme or whatever, but I actually care about this. So you can suffer with everybody else, or you can do the normal thing and not invite a guy you hate to our wedding, you weirdo."
I said that if I did that, it would take out half his groomsmen, he called me an asshole and said I should go explain this to "literally any rational adult" so they could tell me I was in the wrong, and now here we are.
Would you recommend calling my fiance's bluff, since he doesn't want the man sitting near us either? Or should I focus on ensuring he'll turn down the invitation no matter what, so the matter of where he WON'T be sitting can be a moot point?
What are these acronyms?
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The update
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bokunoheros · 2 months ago
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TAGS/WARNINGS: reader is gender neutral but afab, reader and katsuki are dating, everyone is 19+, orgy shenanigans, raw sex (reader is on birth control its okay guys), double penetration, creampies, oral (m. receiving), cum swallowing, handjobs, idk what else GENRE: nasty disgusting smut SUMMARY: your boyfriend asks what you want for your birthday, and your answer certainly surprises him. WORD COUNT: 957 🦊’s A/N: happy 20th birthday to meeee :3 this was a bitch to write btw its literally just some bullshit i cooked up i am so tired i literally gave up on this im So Sorry guys please have mercy // i actually wrote day 22 before this one lmao
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     “mmfh!”
     “shhh, easy pretty,” eijirou coos down at you, cupping your flushed face with one hand, his cock stuffed down your throat.
     currently, you were jerking off denki, trying not to choke around eijirou, with shouto fucking your cunt, and katsuki buried in your ass. to say you were stuffed full would be an understatement. 
     “nngh—” your pussy flutters around shouto’s girthy length, and he groans beneath you. 
     “shit, honey—you’re so fucking tight—” he moans, hips rolling up into your drenched cunt. his words paired with katsuki’s relentless pounding and eijirou’s dick in your mouth had you drooling like a bitch as you try to jerk poor denki off, tears welling up in your eyes from the overwhelming sensations. 
     “nngh–! mmnngh,” you moan, one hand coming to tug at your boyfriend’s spiky hair, an action that has the blond growling and smacking your ass harshly, quirk popping off as his calloused palm makes contact with your tender flesh.
     you squeal at the impact, and it takes every ounce of self restraint kirishima has to not start fucking your face at your wide and teary eyed expression, and you accidentally grip kaminari’s dick a little too tight for comfort, making him moan in a masochistic manner, all while both your cunt and asshole clench around the dicks inside them.
     when katsuki had asked you what you had wanted for your twentieth birthday, the very last thing he had been expecting was for you to shyly, but with an unwavering sort of confidence, request a fucking orgy with some of his friends! you immediately followed up and explained that it wasn’t that you were bored in your relationship with him, but rather that you had always found them to be attractive, too, and you wouldn’t mind getting fucked by them just once. it took him a couple days to mull over the answer, and he ultimately decides sure. fuck it, as long as this wouldn’t ever happen again, right? 
    so, he found himself agreeing to your request on the condition that this was strictly a one time thing, which you accepted of course, as you understood your boyfriend still had a bit of an inferiority complex he was trying to overcome, and the very last thing you wanted was him thinking you wanted one of his friends more than him.
    which is how you found yourself double stuffed like an oreo and then some.
    “mmhhhng—” 
     “you’re doin’ s’well for us, baby,” kaminari slurs out, one hand tangled in your hair, nearly touching kirishima’s, as he bites his bottom lip at the feeling of your hand pumping his slick dick. 
     everything is just too much, and it’s all you can do to mewl around eijirou’s painfully hard cock, the vibrations traveling up his spine as he groans and bucks his hips forward, almost until your nose is flush against his dark pubes (he doesn’t dye them, weirdos) and you’re having to focus on controlling your breathing so you don’t gag like a bitch.
     “yeah, they’re doin’ fuckin’ great,” katsuki adds, one large hand gripping your hip as the other reaches around to play with your neglected clit.
     katsuki..! goddamn him! you think as your body tenses and back arches deeper than you thought possible. 
     your jaw is starting to get sore as well as your arm, and you briefly wonder what on earth you had gotten yourself into before that thought is quickly pushed out of your mind at denki’s announcement that he was close—of course he was, his stamina wasn’t that great to begin with so you sorta figured he’d probably be the first to cum, but what you weren’t expecting was for shouto to bounce off what the dumber blonde had said and admit that he was close, too. 
     it made sense when you took a second to think about it—although he wasn’t lacking in stamina, shouto was still a virgin before all this! (he doesn’t know what exactly compelled him to agree, but here he was anyway, in the middle of an orgy.) so it was only natural that he’d cum fast. not that you took the time to consider a factor like that, though, as you yourself were being worked up towards your first orgasm of the night.
     eijirou as well, you’re quick to figure out, based on the way his cock is drooling and twitching in the back of your throat, and you do your best to swallow around him while looking up at him with glassy eyes. your expression has the redhead biting his fist and groaning into it as you stick your tongue out to lick press against the underside of his cock. 
     it’s not long before kirishima’s cumming down your throat with a loud cry, just as denki jizzes all over your hand—some of it even landing on your face and in your hair. shouto’s not far behind either until katsuki yells at him not to cum inside—something todoroki blatantly ignores due to just how snug your pussy was, squeezing around him like a goddamn vice. how the fuck did that explosive bastard seriously expect him to pull out?
     despite having cum already, kiri makes no efforts to pull out of your mouth—not until denki’s shoving him out of the way at least, claiming it was his turn next. 
     “wa—ahh! wait! i— i ne–need a second!” you cry as katsuki suddenly spanks your cunt, making you jolt at the impact and wail his name—providing kaminari with the perfect opportunity to shove his dick in your mouth. 
     “hhmng—!” you whine incoherently around the new dick invading your hot mouth, and a chill runs down your spine when you feel shouto cum inside you—holy shit. 
    it was going to be a long fuckin’ night….
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