#some of the lines from this are haunting me

[and-the-times-we-had]

Fully agree with the original assessment that Feanor and his decisions haunt the narrative in a significant way, but sometimes I think that this idea is overstated. He is important, no doubt, but I wouldn't call him a protagonist. He's also not the only character to make life altering decisions that affect others long after (truly Finwe could be argued to be unparalleled on this front). Honestly, I'm not sure that there is a character in the Silmarillion that can truly be said to be the protagonist (no, I don't think Fingolfin and his line are protagonists either) because it is simply not that kind of story on the whole. Individual parts of it have their protagonists (Beren & Luthien and Turin come to mind), but no character or even group of characters jumps out at me as the overall protagonists in this book. And given that it is supposed to be a history/mythology, that seems only right. History isn't made of protagonists, and no one is the main character even if they do a lot of important things. They're just individual actors in the long and winding path that the story takes, which is why it can and does continue on without them.

All that being said, I'd like to address some of the points made in the above reply to the original post.

I think that the idea that "everything of importance done by the Noldor in the actual war against Morgoth is done by the children and grandchildren of Indis" is not exactly accurate to the text. Sure, Fingolfin and his children and Finarfin and his children are very important in the fight against Morgoth, but it is untrue to say that they did everything of importance (with the evident implication being that the Feanorians did nothing of importance). I'm also unclear about what your definition of "the actual war against Morgoth" refers to specifically (i.e. which battles qualify).

I would disagree that Feanor dies pointlessly (or that it is embarrassing, tbh); he thinks (incorrectly, due to ignorance about Morgoth's forces in Angband itself and his overzealous wrath) that he has a chance to take down Morgoth then and there based on the fact that he and his forces have just spent the last 10 days reducing Morgoth's forces to "no more than a handful of leaves". This doesn't really seem that ridiculous to me from his perspective. He's mortally wounded fighting a host of orcs and several Balrogs (including Gothmog!) all on his own. That hardly seems pointless or embarrassing, in my opinion.

I'd also argue that while Fingolfin's duel with Morgoth is dramatic and heroic, it's not really climactic either. Despite him managing to injure Morgoth, Fingolfin doesn't really accomplish that much more than Feanor does against Morgoth in the grand scheme (though his death isn't pointless either). The Quenta Silmarillion goes on for 100 more pages after said duel, and even the "Of the Ruin of Beleriand" chapter itself goes on for several more pages detailing how Morgoth's forces continue to gain control over areas of Beleriand after Fingolfin's death.

Honestly, I think that both of their deaths are tragic (which yeah, they are both under the Doom, that seems like how it should go) and I have a lot more to say about some of the similar language that is used to describe them both in the course of these battles but that feels like a separate post. For the purposes of this post, I'll just say that both Feanor and Fingolfin are great examples of powerful figures who are just as vulnerable to the march of time and history as any other character.

Moving on, I do think it would have been significantly more difficult if not downright impossible for Nargothrond and Gondolin to come into being and exist long enough in peace and safety for Beren and Tuor to arrive and set those events in motion if the Sons of Feanor had not had/been a part of major victories earlier on in the story. And they are a big part of several key early victories. The text says that the Battle-under-Stars was "renowned in song" and that the Noldor were "outnumbered and taken at unawares" but that they "were yet swiftly victorious". That "the orcs fled before them, and they were driven forth from Mithrim with great slaughter, and hunted over the Mountains of Shadow". They were so effective that the orcs who were attacking Cirdan and the Falas had to come up as relief only to be swiftly taken out by Celegorm and his host. I will once again mention the "handful of leaves" thing. Morgoth is said in the text to be "dismayed" by the outcome of the battle. Feanor's death, while influential, is basically the only negative outcome of this battle for the Noldor. And I don't think it's out of line to postulate that a least a small part of the reason Fingolfin and his people are able to essentially walk off the Helcaraxe and into Mithrim unopposed (in the Silmarillion version, not the Shibboleth version) is because of the success of this early battle (the other major part being the rising of the Sun causing what remains of Morgoth's servants to flee into Angband). Also, the fact that the Feanorian host inadvertently helped to relieve Cirdan has wide ranging positive consequences considering the role he plays in later events, even if it wasn't their intended goal.

Fingon saving Maedhros absolutely does help the Feanorians since it helps the Noldor  as a whole end their strife and unite, but I don't think it's because Maedhros is only one with "a demonstrable ability to negotiate". It's possible that Maedhros is just the only one who is actually able to transfer the crown. None of his brothers are canonically the King while he still lives as Morgoth's captive. The Feanorians also don't seem to be actively antagonistic to Fingolfin's host just prior to the rescue. The text has them moving to the south of Lake Mithrim of their own volition to avoid strife and says that "many of Feanor's people indeed repented of the burning at Losgar, and were filled with amazement at the valour that had brought the friends whom they had abandoned over the Ice of the North; and they would have welcomed them, but they dared not, for shame". It is Fingolfin's host that felt (understandably) grieved and angered when they arrived and faced the Feanorian host ("no love was there in the hearts of those that followed Fingolfin for the House of Feanor, for the agony of those that endured the crossing of the Ice had been great, and Fingolfin held the sons the accomplices of their father. Then there was peril of strife between the hosts.")

I also disagree that the Feanorians become secondary to the story after the abdication. They are dispossesed of the Kingship and the Silmarils, not of narrative importance, and they actually do quite a bit between the time of the abdication and the Nirnaeth. Just after the abdication, for example, the Noldor (including the Feanorians) are said to be united and it is said that they had "set a watch upon the borders of Dor Daedeloth, and Angband was beleaguered from west, and south, and east; and they sent forth messengers far and wide to explore the countries of Beleriand, and to treat with the people that dwelt there". Maedhros is said to be willing to take the chance that "the chief peril of assault should fall upon himself" by placing himself at Himring and he is said to remain in friendship with the houses of Fingolfin and Finarfin including when he and Maglor attend the Mereth Aderthad.

I would say, though, that the most clear example of the fact that the Feanorians do play an important role in the fight against Morgoth is the role they play in the Dagor Aglareb and the Siege of Angband. The text says that "Fingolfin and Maedhros were not sleeping, and while others sought out the scattered bands of Orcs that strayed in Beleriand and did great evil they came upon the main host from either side as it was assaulting Dorthonion; and they defeated the servants of Morgoth, and pursuing them across Ard-galan destroyed them utterly, to the least and last, within sight of Angband's gates". Then the text says that "the princes took heed of it, and thereafter drew closer their leaguer, and strengthened and ordered their watch, setting the Siege of Angband". It is the Siege that truly allows the kingdoms of the Noldor to flourish in safety and peace and the Feanorians are very much contributing to that Siege by holding the line on the entire Northeastern part of Beleriand. In fact, the two times that Morgoth does attempt an attack on the Noldor during the Siege, he aims those attacks at Hithlum. He doesn't do this because he thinks that Fingolfin is a bigger or more important threat but because Maedhros's constant vigilance makes Fingolfin and Hithlum the easier target.

I do agree that Morgoth regards the Oath of Feanor as being useful for his purposes in the time period post Nirnaeth. Anyone involved with the Silmaril or the Oath at that time does a fantastic job of playing into Morgoth's desires for division among the Eldar.

To return to my initial point, I think the fandom tends to center certain characters (Feanor in particular) more in its discussions of the text than the text itself might do. I hope that everything I laid out here goes to show how multiple characters can contribute to the flow of events without any of them being the protagonist specifically.

It never ceases to amuse me that Feanor’s narrative arc ends like THAT.

like this guy is built up to be a genius in 2384739847 different ways, charismatic as fuck, insanely spiritually powerful, made the magical artifacts the book is named after, he’s got Sexy Protagonist Energy for days, you’re only like a few chapters into the actual story of the Silmarillion, so you’re like “yeah, alright, this guy’s our guy, i can’t wait to see what crazy shit he gets up to in Middle-earth, what kind of character development he has–”

and then he gets to Beleriand, tries to fight Satan, and IMMEDIATELY dies. like. Battle #1. he beefs it. literally spontaneously combusts.

AND YOU STILL HAVE MOST OF THE REST OF THE BOOK LEFT. absolutely ICONIC of tolkien to kill his main character in the first third of the story, and then despite elves being able to return from the dead, he literally never does, not even post-canon. NO ONE ELSE CAN PULL THAT OFF. this is SUCH a power move.

….on a more serious note, Feanor’s decisions and motivations leave a huge impact on every other character, almost every other plot point in the entire story can be traced back to what he did, and killing him off not only increases his narrative importance to those he left behind but also makes it impossible for any character to actually confront him or reconcile with him. he’s a ghost throughout the whole rest of the story, but he’s haunting everyone in myriad ways, through the Oath, through the Silmarils, through his sons, through the repercussions of the First Kinslaying, through the unrest of the Noldor and the rebellion against the Valar, through everything.

So like. Feanor might die as soon as he sets foot in Beleriand, which is hilarious from a narrative standpoint - but only at first glance. Because he’s still there for the rest of the story. You can’t escape him, no matter how hard you try.

[itsseohannbin]

hard bangchan thoughts || dark romance

disclaimer: every single time I come across this photo of bangchan, I am absolutely wrecked with the most vile, dirty, inhumane thoughts, so please enjoy this as it's been on my mind for LITERAL WEEKS now and I can't stop.

Warnings: hard thoughts. swearing. established relationship. smut. unprotected sex. voyeurism & exhibitionism. mentions the titles and contexts of several intense dark romance books that are not suitable for younger audiences. (i.e gun/knife play, somno, stalking, kidnapping, bondage. etc etc) (if you choose to research these books, please do so at your risk as they include some pretty heavy and intense topics.) roleplaying (??). I think that's it. let me know if I missed any!

Enjoy! [lower case intended. not proof read]

everytime i see this photo of chan i'm brought back to the same scenario in my head that i've been having for months? years?

like, you and chan decide to go on a little bookstore date where you purchase some starbucks and walk around a popular bookstore chain, both of you browsing and exploring and just enjoying the relaxing atmosphere. at some point, the two of you get separated, chan going off to look through the graphic novel section while you bee-line right to the romance section. or more so, the dark romance section.

you've always been a lover of dark romance novels. you've read your fair share of nasty, vile, intense books, like haunting adeline, the ritual & the sacrifice, and so much more. you use the trigger warnings at the beginning of each book as a checklist that covers all your favorite topics to read about, no matter how crazy or intense they are.

so, hours later, when chan has finally decided on the books he wants to purchase and take home, he comes looking for you. as per usual, he finds you curled up in a chair on the second floor of the building, in the corner near the dark romance section. he greets you with a kiss on the head, but you barely register his actions, too engrossed in the newest instalment from your favorite dark romance author. chan just chuckles, shaking his head as he sits down across from you, sipping on the remains of his drink while he watches you with dark eyes. and he watches you so intensely its amazing how you don't look up to meet his fiery gaze.

he never understood your obsession with the genre. it was too intense for him, too out of bounds for his liking. he's read over your shoulder one too many times to understand what kind of shit you're into, and although he loves you dearly, he could never bring himself to subject his brain to that type of rot. but there's something about the way you're reading so intently now, the nail of your thumb between your front teeth, eyes scrunched forward in concentration. something about the way your legs subtly shift together, as if you're trying to adjust yourself into a more comfortable position, but chan knows better. you only fidget like this when you're really nervous or really turned on, and based on the way you're hiding a cheeky, embarrassed smile behind the cuff of your sleeve, he can only assume its the latter. and that's where his obsession then starts.

he's not obsessed with reading the books, but obsessed with finding out which part in these books is giving you such a physical reaction. he's determined to find out just what is making you squirmy and horny every time you have a relaxing reading night together. so chan does his research. he takes note of all the books he's seen give you that reaction and he researches them. he downloads previews of the chapters, blushing with embarrassment when he reads some of the stuff these books have in them. like being fucked with the barrel of a gun, or being stalked in the safety of your own home. chan is so intrigued and so confused and disturbed at the same time. of course, he would NEVER do anything of this to you, that would be too far, but he wants to plan something to get that type of reaction out of you, to make you moan his name and not zade fucking matthews'.

so that's how you ended up here months later, spread out on the bed with chan slowly and roughly dragging his long, thick cock against your tight walls, the ridges and veins driving you insane with each passing minute. he's got his eyes locked on you, and yours on him, the eye contact making you preen and break under the pressure. little ah-ah-ahs sit at the tip of your mouth, but you can't let them out, not unless you want your mother to hear what's going on on your end of the phone line. she's yapping in your ear about the family barbeque she's been planning for weeks in advanced, and you're really trying to listen and be encouraging, but it's getting really hard to focus when chan is fucking you so slowly, so deliciously, his large, muscular body hovering over you and caging you in.

he rocks his hips upwards experimentally, causing a hiccup to leave your mouth. chan's eyebrow raises in amusement as the horror takes over your face at the noise you had just made, embarrassment flushing your cheeks when your mom pauses her tyrant and asks if you're alright. 'honey, is everything okay?' she asks, concern lacing her tone. your eyes stay glued to chans, his hands squeezing your hips as he bucks his hips forward once more, almost eliciting a scream from your throat. 'i'm fine mom,' you struggle with getting the words out 'i'm just struggling with.... something at the moment.' chan reaches his hand down and inserts his finger into you alongside his cock, alternating his thrusts to match the opposite of his fingers movements. 'do you need me to let you go?' she asks, completely oblivious to the way your sweet, usually innocent boyfriend is completely rearranging your guts in the most glorious way possible. a 'yes' begs to fall from your lips, but you stop it when you see chan shake his head slowly. confusion passes over your features, his finger and his cock bringing you to feel a new level of pleasure. 'no?' you reply back. chan takes a moment to pull his finger out and wrap his large hands around your pretty throat, growling in your opposite ear 'you hang up and i stop moving'. at that, your orgasm crashes over you and you have no choice but to cry out loudly as the waves hit you like a tsunami. never have you cum so hard before. but omg you just came all over chans cock, crying out loudly with your mother on the phone. horror passes over your features once more and you can feel yourself beginning to panic when chan lifts the phone up, showing you the toggled mute button on screen. he then pulls all the way out and unmutes the phone, putting a finger to his mouth to shut you up before he slams back in, the vibrations from your orgasm only adding to the oversensitivity of it all. 'hello mama,' chan then puts the phone to his ear, his hips picking up pace as he begins to slam into your pussy recklessly. you can feel yourself getting brought over the edge again when he smiles down at you. 'what do you want us to bring for the barbeque?'

~~~~~

Taglist: @moonlightndaydreams @channieandhisgoonsquad @newhope8 @noellllslut @queenmea604 @kaiyaba @rxosies @bethanysnow

[sitepathos]

Hello. I really enjoy your story, "From Mold to Gold". The story is very well written that I could feel the emotions the reader is feeling. Please keep up the good work, but take your time. The real world can be overwhelming, and sometimes, writer's block can get in the way.

I was wondering if you have heard a song called "Thank You for Hating Me" by Citizen Soldier. When I heard that song, it made me think of your story. I imagine the reader going to a karaoke bar in Las Vegas to blow off some steam or something, and when they noticed the batfam there, the reader decided to show them how they feel (takes place after chapter 11). With this song, it would show that the reader is the bigger person form moving on from their past and growing into someone better. At the same time, telling the batfam to leave them alone and paint them in a bad light, even though everyone read The Daily Planet.

I thought this would be a good little one-shot or thought that I had. Thank you for taking the time to read this. Love your story. I can't wait for the next chapter.

#ask #from gold to mold

I swear, when you sent that ask, I was already halfway done with 12 and when I saw Vegas, I legit thought you had future sight, or something! I’m serious, I freaked out a little!

Also, I have to thank you for introducing me to this song! It’s amazing and I swear it could be the song of this entire series! It fits Reader to a T!

But as for your ask, you’d actually do amazing at a karaoke bar since the Megamycete has absorbed so countless people with musical abilities from across the ages, many of them quite talented at singing. If you wanted to, you could easily make a career of it if you wanted to.

But, if you were to perform “Thank You for Hating Me,” you’d definitely look them in the eye the entire time.

While you’re on stage, they can hear the pain, suffering, and hatred in every word. They knew they treated you wrong, but hearing you sing really drives home just how much they hurt you all those years.

Bruce would keep his emotionless mask intact (mostly), but he nearly cries when he hears the line “for making me feel I’m not enough.” It’s then he realizes that he really never took the time to get to know you. When he first met you, he was dealing with Jason’s death by burying himself in his work and he was too stupid to see himself in you that night in Crime Alley; and when his family grew, he still treated you like an outsider because he knew you weren’t fit to be a vigilante with them and you lacked the capability to aid them like Barbara. No matter what excuses he can muster, he made you feel like you were worthless and there’s no changing that.

Dick cries practically during the entire time. Seriously, this song just puts all his insecurities about his treatment of you on blast and he feels even more of a failure of a big brother. The title is what started it and he’s just blubbering, “I can never hate you, baby bird!” If there’s one thing in this life Dick holds dear to his heart, it’s his title as the big brother of the Wayne Family and you singing this song emphasizes that he failed and it’s haunted him ever since Alfred reminded him that you exist.

Jason, while upset over you putting your feelings about them in song form, feels closer to you as the song gives him a glimpse into how you see things. Ever since he learned that you were kidnapped (in his territory, no less) and were beaten to near death and then shot in the head like an animal, he’s been a powder keg just waiting to blow as it brought up all the memories of his death at the hands of Joker. To him, the two of you are kindred spirits, especially since you were brought back to life just like him. He also feels a connection to you when you say the line “for seething me off like a loaded gun” because he’s known his temper has always been his greatest weakness, even before meeting Bruce and when he hears the anger in your voice while you’re on stage, he sees a younger version of himself in you. He’s spent years running his mouth about how there’s no one in the family he can relate to and he was too fucking stupid to see how alike the two of you are.

Tim, while feeling like shit during your performance, spends the time to analyze your singing and he ponders if you were always capable of singing like this (how could he have missed that?!) or if the Megamycete has given you the ability to sing like this? He also can’t help but feel targeted when you look him in the eye when you say the lines “to hide how much you hate yourself,” “go get some help,” and “cause you’re always gonna be alone.” It’s like you know all his insecurities and you know just how to pick at them. Of course, with how they treated you like you didn’t exist for years, it would make sense that you more about them then they previously thought. He’ll have to update his profile on you when he gets back home… after he gets done crying in the shower, of course.

Steph and Cass are both in the same boat because they both cringe at the line “for showing no love” because they’re both guilty of that. Steph used you when she first got to the manor, showing you affection for a week and then discarding you like some toy when she eventually got bored with you because you weren’t a vigilante and Cass didn’t give you a second glance when she deemed you weak and not a threat. Back then, you weren’t a part of the family or even a person to them and now, they’d give anything to go back and fix their mistakes.

Damian, like Bruce, keeps a mask on the entire time, but on the inside, he’s torn up. He knows when he first arrived, he wasn’t the friendliest person and his upbringing with the LoA didn’t have room for any familiar affections. He grew up with knowledge that he was the rightful heir to the Bat and the Demon, but when he learned of your existence, he felt threatened as it would make sense that the firstborn son would inherit his legacy and so he attacked you. And once he found out you had no training and no way to defend yourself, he went out of his way to demean you so you would never rise above your station and threaten his position as the next head of the Wayne Family. But, in recent years, he’s learned the importance of family and has slowly come to respect and build a rapport with each of his siblings… even Drake. But due to his arrogance, he scorned you, his only blood brother, and has no idea on how he’s going to fix it.

Will this change their minds about bringing you back to Gotham and convince them to leave you alone once and for all? Hell no. They’re too far into their delusions and there’s no way of bringing them out of it. All it does is just add fuel to the fire.

Also, people record this and post it online, one video titled “Forgotten Wayne Blasts Neglectful Family.” It gets 50m views within an hour of its posting.

[rainydonutfun]

Oh, I've been wanting to speak out about this for a long time. Robin and Slade's relationship. I would describe the dynamics of Robin/Terra and Slade as follows:

"She was Lola in slacks. She was Dolly at school. She was Dolores on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Lolita."

Why is Robin so fixated on Deathstroke?

Don't forget that Robin was raised by Batman and therefore Robin picked up some of his bad habits. Robin is a perfectionist who hates losing throughout the series. (Winner Take All). He is constantly training and striving to be better. Slade manipulates him by relying on these features of Robin.

"It's simple. There is good and there is evil. There are people who commit crimes and those who prevent them. Two sides of the same coin, opposite as day and night. There is a clear boundary between them, or at least it should be."

The first encounter between Slade and Robin took place in the series "Forces of Nature". There, Robin will first encounter rivals that he will not be able to catch. This will instill in him a sense of guilt for his mistake, and in each subsequent battle this feeling will become stronger and stronger.

"You and I are surprisingly similar."

Slade will use it. He will force Robin to distance himself from his team. Grayson will turn red to get close to the villain, which will cause distrust in the future. Slade will often draw a parallel between them, claiming that they are the same, thereby causing Robin to doubt his beliefs. He forces Robin to steal from Wayne Enterprises, which reinforces Robin's sense of guilt.

"We even think the same way.… I've been monitoring your biological parameters during the fight: heart rate, adrenaline, endorphin. You didn't even know, but at some stage you were enjoying stealing for me."

Consequences or "Haunted "

In episode 3 of the Haunted season, we are shown the consequences of Robin and his experiences. There is no formal Slade in the series itself. All we see are Robin's hallucinations that reflect his fears. Throughout season 3, Robin has the idea that Slade is alive. The Titans convince him that this is not the case. Grayson constantly checks the monitors, goes down to the basement to check Slade's mask. this suggests that he did not let go of the situation. And after poisoning , his movements are revealed .

He is afraid that he has become weaker, that he has not been able to defeat his enemy on his own, because at the end of season 1 he was helped by the Titans, and in the second by Terra. He's downright paranoid. (It's very similar to PTSD)

"No, Robin. I won't stop. Not now, not ever. I am the thing that keeps you up at night. The evil that haunts every dark corner of your mind. I will never rest...and neither will you."

In the future, Robin will remember this situation less often, but the limited effect will still remain.

Result:

Slade left a serious injury and undermined Robin's trust in his team. He's a manipulative and creepy person. His reciprocal obsession with Robin, an underage boy, worries me a lot too. It seems very frightening to me. But most of all, I'm probably scared of people romanticizing their relationship. Is literally an adult man and an underage boy!

Note:

I drew the art purely for this post. For the atmosphere :)

[jesncin]

Some inspiration for this comic and Hellblazer homework:

Noah repeats the "any hand will do." line from the Hellblazer Fear Machine arc. I thought it would be so fitting if Noah didn't even realize he was emulating his dad's kindness too. After all, Noah holding someone's hand to comfort them did happen in canon.

Astra Logue, the girl John damned to Hell when messing with demons he shouldn't have, ended up losing her arm in the Newcastle Incident. In the Critical Mass arc, John manages to free her and several other children's souls from Hell. Some versions of Johnstantine don't include this arc so that John's guilt over Astra is a constant in his life.

Either way, we purposefully left it ambiguous whether John and Astra are in Heaven, Hell, or something in between. What matters was allegorizing that forgiveness. We also didn't want Astra's arm to be "cured"- instead fully committing to her being an amputee. It didn't feel right to imply that she's an amputee in Hell but she gets her arm back in Heaven- especially when we're responding to the ableist ending of Dead In America. The disabled children John wronged forgiving him because "they're cured now" felt thematically hollow and ableist.

So!! I wanted this send off to feel as Mike Flanagan-core as possible. Which meant we needed a MONOLOGUE

John's speech is inspired by the poem "Good Bones" by Maggie Smith. I took the "realtor" angle and reframed it to fit John's silver tongue conman character. So it morphed to being about protecting kids from how cruel we know the world to be.

Speaking of over-protecting-! Yeah that's right, we are pulling an Uno reverse on that canon "curing Noah" ending. While I get that it wasn't directly John who "cured" Noah (it was Clarice), I tried to keep some essence of it by reframing it as John being so protective of Noah that he thinks he can change who his son is for the "better". But then John recognizes how ableist he's being to who Noah is.

In canon, from Hellblazer 2019 to Dead in America, Noah's disability is treated as an inconvenience to overcome. Noah's disability is the unintended result of John's magical shenanigans, so curing it is part of John's redemption. Instead we have it so that John's growth ends with leaving Noah the way he is. I even made a nod to the "Making things easier? Simpler? Why not?" line from canon but reframed it as a flaw on John's part.

For those not in the know, Noah's situation is that he lost his voice as a very young boy when his mom was attacked by a demonic entity. His mom has been in a coma ever since, and Noah steadfastly visits her "at least twice a week". Noah lived most of his life having to both hope but grieve his only parent for so long. This made it feel all the more fitting that he should be the one to send off John at the end. He's used to sitting by his mom, ready to say goodbye any day now.

Like John, Noah's placement in our story is ambiguous too. Afterwards Noah's left to his own devices, he wants to make it back home, and he's still a very vulnerable kid at the end of the day. Not everything is wrapped up neatly, and I don't think it should be. John's prepared him as best as he can, intentionally or not. It's all a part of letting go and being worried for their safety regardless.

[spoilers for Midnight Mass]

To bring the Flanagan vibes together, we pulled from Riley's death scene in Midnight Mass. Riley is so John-coded that I swear there's a hidden perfect John Constantine movie somewhere inside this series. Riley spends the whole series haunted by the young woman he accidentally killed in a drunken car accident. But when he meets his end, the young woman is there to welcome him sweetly. It's SO INTENSE haha. I've had a Johnstantine death scene saved in my pocket ever since, so I refitted it for Dead in America. We made Noah and Astra parallels of each other.

Despite being called "Dead in America" to hype up the death of its hero, John's send off never landed for me. I get that cape comic characters never truly stay dead, (especially when they make tons of money for the company) but I was hoping for an ending that at least felt emotionally final and convincing. Something that brought everything about John Constantine full circle. In canon, it's a bunch of events that accumulate into a larger event where John just happens to get the short end of the stick and rot away. He's sent off into the ocean by Swamp Thing, his new friend that he barely got to know (Nat), and his son he barely connected with (Noah) are just there.

This is me trying to visually express "Forgiveness is warm. Like a tear on a cheek" from Nell's speech in Flanagan's Haunting of Hill House. I didn't want it to have words. I Uno-reversed Flanagan's obsession with monologues you see.

Dead In America acts self aware about how anti-climatic and unsatisfying it is, but that doesn't magically make it good- y'know what I mean? I wanted an ending that actually said something about parenthood, being buried by your children, worrying if you prepared them enough to survive, worrying that they've emulated the worst parts of you, or that you've become the worst parts of your own parents. Something that called back to John's origin story as a guy who messed up and screwed over the life of an innocent kid. Dealing with having his own kid should be this ending piece to that tragedy. So here's what it looks like if Dead in America bothered.

A Father's Farewell: The End Of The Road.

Our take on Hellblazer: Dead In America's ending, focusing in on John's relationship with Noah, legacy, and parenthood.

[thefirstknife]

Bel, I needed a few days to digest the tablet of ruin. And one thing came to my mind nonstop: if the Witness was the First Knife, the Winnower is showing that we can be the Last, proving it right, as its most perfect argument.

I am still digesting it, not gonna lie. I'm definitely expecting more on the Winnower now that it's been officially and directly named as a speaker to us. It might make more sense as we go further into the episode, looking forward to revisiting everything at some point down the line.

This and the lore tabs featured in the newest grimoire are haunting me. Where do they fit? Are they from Heresy? After Heresy?

I'm still not convinced this is some "next big bad" setup mostly because everything about it so far has been so abstract and bizarre and I'd like it to stay that way, but I'm now more interested to see where it goes since it's no longer just some presumed narrator in a religious text. Really intrigued to see what they planned!

[starlightshadowsworld]

The Armed Detective Agency as Epic the Musical Lyrics (contains Manga Spoilers)

Yukuchi Fukuzawa: Just a man

“I look into your eyes and I think back to the son of mine

You’re as old as he was

When I left for war

Will these actions haunt my days?

Every man I’ve slain

Is the price I pay endless pain?

Close your eyes

And spare yourself the view”

Edogawa Ranpo: Luck Runs Out

“Have faith friend we’ve come this far

‘Yes but how much longer till your luck runs out?

How much longer till your show goes south?

How much longer till we all fall down?

You rely on wit

And people die on it’ ”

Akiko Yosano: My goodbye

“Unlike you when someone dies I’m left to deal with the strain

What’s a title of a goddess if I’ll never sleep at night?

I’ll remind you I saw you as a friend

But now we’re done

This way your out of my head now

This way you won’t plague my life”

Doppo Kunikida: Monster

I’m surrounded by the souls of those I’ve lost

I’m the only one who’s line I haven’t crossed

What if the greatest threat we’ll find across the sea

Is me?

What if I’m the monster?

What if I’ve been wrong?

What if I’m the problem that’s been hiding all along?

Katai Tayama: Puppeteer

“But nothing could prepare us for the power that awaited inside

‘What did this palace hide?’

Sir since we left home we’ve faced a variety of foes from a wide range of places

Gods, monsters you know the roster

Hostile creatures that we could resist

But this was a hell of a twist because we are weak to a power like this

‘What was it?’

A woman”

Osamu Dazai: We’ll be fine

“I had a friend before and he was a lot like you

I helped him fight through war but he had his demons too

And then we grew apart

Then his light went dark

And so I thought maybe if I’d made a different call

Maybe if I hadn’t missed it all

Maybe he’d be fine”

Kenji Miyazawa: Open Arms

“You can show a person that you trust them

When you stop and lower your guard

Here we have a chance for some adjustment

Give it a try it’s not that hard

I’m telling you

This life is amazing when you greet it with open arms”

Junichiro Tanizaki: Odysseus

“He’s using the darkness to hide his approaches

We’re empty handed up against an archer

Our only hope is to strike him in the darkness

We know these halls the odds can be tilted

‘You don’t think I know my own palace?

I built it’ ”

Atsushi Nakajima: The Underworld

“All I hear are screams

Every time I dare to close my eyes

I no longer dream

Only nightmares of those who died

Nothings what it seems (nothings what it seems)

And here in the underworld the past seems close behind

This land confuses the mind”

Kyouka Izumi: I can’t help but wonder

“I can’t help but wonder what your world must be

If we’re like each other

If I have your strength in me

All this time I’ve wondered

If you’d embrace me as your own

Twenty years I’ve wondered

For so long I’ve felt alone”

[tinyozlion]

I'm continuing on my journey through the broader Gundam franchise, and I think War in the Pocket might be the best and most complete Gundam/MS/ real-robots genre movie one could make. It's feels like a perfect summation of the themes of the series, the world building, the atmosphere, the moral ambiguity, the horror, melancholy, and bittersweet hopefulness born out of grief and human perseverance. It uses the audience's awareness of danger and concern for the characters to passively build up tension the same way the best horror stories and classic tragedies do; it makes the stakes feel SO real and it delivers such an absolute gut punch with each fully-earned consequence. It's one of those perfect stories that fills in the all important empty space between major events and main characters that reaches its maximum poignancy because it takes place in the background of larger events that are already familiar. It answers the question "what was happening all the time, everywhere else, to everyone else."

I think if there's anyone watching gundam shows who finds themselves taken out of the story because they're hung up thinking like, "yeah but what would MS combat really look like if you didn't pull any punches?" (exactly as horrific and gruesome as most mechanized violence is, combined with the unique awfulness of space physics), or "what would it really be like to live on a space colony where mobile suit battles were a constant threat to your way of life?" (you'd become worryingly desensitized and resigned very quickly), or "what if the various scifi militaries operated with the same bottom-line utilitarianism that you'd expect them to?" (they'd make decisions that are uncomfortable to watch), then this will answer all those questions-- and offer a pretty clear demonstration why that level of graphic violence is generally hidden behind the fig leaf of clean, circular explosions. But War in the Pocket let's you know exactly what's being omitted, in a way that makes one uncomfortably conscious of human fragility in reality as well as in the fiction, as I think any anti-war story properly must. It is incredibly beautiful, brilliantly and subtly told, and fucking devastating.

Man. It genuinely shook me. What an incredible entry into the franchise and what an incredible film/OVA all on its own.

[symphonicsoul]

⋯✧・♪♫♪・✧⋯ 'Breathe Sitriini. He doesn't mean it. He doesn't know what he's saying.'

His brother's voice is in his ear again and he is resisting every urge in him to yell back. It's not helping right now when this child is doing what Soil is best at and that's going around in fucking circles.

How hard is it for the soil Souls to grasp that they say what they mean and there are no hidden meaning to it? Why is it every time he talks to one of these people he ends up in this extremely frustrating situation?

He doesn't even know if they do it on purpose at this point. How did Helakan negotiate with such creatures?!

"You just have to be the center of the fucking universe, don't you? You think the world revolves around you? Are ALL you humans like this because every one I've met seems to have the same fucking problem?!

If I fucking hated you, why the fuck would I follow you out into the hellscape I just got out of months ago?! Why would I leave my husband's side for some punk kid I hated?! You fucking Soil Souls can never just listen with your ears and always leave us going around in fucking circles!"

His hands are balling up in fists at his sides as he can feel his brother lingering close to his side and it's all the more painful because he knows the Solar King isn't actually there.

'Breathe Sitriini. You know getting this riled up isn't good for you.' The phantom sounds and that's when the symphony's eye twitches and he turns his head to snap at the ghost to his side.

"Shut UP Helakan. Nobody asked you. You aren't even HERE! You just keep following me around and haunting me and quite frankly this isn't the fucking time!"

'Sitriini please. I know you're angry but this isn't good for you. He's just a boy and he's lost just like you were.'

"When I was lost, I had Sielu and Sydän but now Sielu is injured and Sydän is dead. So spare me your lectures, Helakan. Everyone I loved including you and your son are gone now so forgive me if I try to spare a child from experiencing what I did even if he is a snot nosed brat about it."

'Sitriini I know what you're doing but you're going to hurt yourself. Sielu will worry even more if you don't come back soon.'

"I FUCKING KNOW that, Isoveli. I am doing my fucking best here, but there's only so much I can do when people don't just hear the words I say and listen. I'm not talking in circles here, brother, but the soil Souls always have to find another meaning in what we say. I don't talk in circles, I'm a fucking straight line!!"

He can see the phantom next to him sigh and drop his shoulders as he lingers in the air next to him. That sort of sigh where his brother would relent that was truly no arguing with him, even if allowing the man of orange to become so riled was a danger to his health.

His eyes are back on the child, with molten lava boiling in his vision.

"Don't just stand there. Start walking. I don't want to be out here all night. We're two days out on foot and I'd rather not make take it any longer than it has to be."

Ling's fingers are twitching the more Orange rants. He's really making him out to be some sort of monster, as if he's the one who caused all his suffering. He's storing some information to the back of his mind he'll have to look into later, but right now he's having an internal debate with himself.

And it's slowly starting to get loud. He can hear him telling him to give it a rest. This isn't how he was raised. He knows better. He needs to calm down. He should. Deep in the back of his mind he knows he should.

He stops walking and turns around to face Sinfonia with a glare. He hates this. He hates everything. He shouldn't be here arguing with some Mist Soul. He should be with Lan Fan in Xing, trying to become emperor. He should not be in Wonderland and suffering from the effects of it.

"You think I give a shit about the fact you're 'Mist based'? You think that's what the problem is? It doesn't matter to me whether you're a Mist Soul or a human, I don't care."

Because even if he was talking to another human right now, in this particular moment, he would be acting the same way. The only difference is he wouldn't refer to them as a colour, because humans don't have specific colours to define them. Mist Souls clearly do.

"But you do. You hate the fact I'm a human. You wouldn't treat anyone else like this, would you? No. It's just me because I'm a worthless little human." He takes a step forward. "Well, if you can't stand being around me, then go back by yourself. No one is expecting you to arrive back with someone. So go ahead, leave. You know you want to."

He steps forward again, stumbling just the smallest bit. He might regret all this later but he can't bring himself to care right now. He's just so tired. Whatever happens happens.

"Or are you afraid of being out there on your own again? Afraid that, by some chance, you won't make it back and you don't want to go through that alone. Is that it?"

[raticalshoez]

SECRET LIFE SPOILERS!!!

Some Secret Life traditional sketches of Session 6! My digital art was looking doodoo so I tried to fight artblock by going back to paper. MY CAMERA SUCKS THOUGH. Maybe I'll transfer to digital someday.

Edit: FUCK. I FORGOT JOEL HAS THE LIFE MERCH ON THIS SEASON.

Close-ups under cut!:

[bb-eb-db-bb-eb-b-ab-f-b-ab]

i’m going to ask something that no one is going to like. do we really believe kavik outlived yangchen

[vaguely-concerned]

I was just ambushed within the turbulent halls of my own mind by some headcanons about rye ingellvar's childhood that did 15000000 points of psychic damage to me and my heart personally and also made me almost sure of how I want to play it all at the end (very very differently from how I imagined going in!). some 'oh holy fuck this changes everything' rocking my own world bullshit going on in my neurons right now I'm reeling

[timothyslucy]

“you scared me." 🤝 “yeah i about had a heart attack.” 🤝 “i can’t lose you the way i lost her.”

the holy trinity.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

idk if theres any character trope that makes me more insane than the knight/guard dog…… the character who is eternally devoted and entirely loyal to one specific person to the point where its self destructive but they genuinely do not care even a little bit

[driftwooddestiel]

(video source here) one of the charlie clips of all time. literally whyd he do that 😭

[hermit-frog]

god the visuals and sound design in this movie, i want to scream. think that last time i've been this hyperaware of my own body was while watching the martyrs (2008). (my dad made me to watch it when i was in the middle school lmao yay trauma) it haunts me to this day. but my distress was caused by the visuals and the idea itself, while with the nosferatu movie, it's the sounds (visually, didn't find the movie scary). got so focused on his breathing that didn't even notice the soundtrack, which is unlike me. it's the ✨Count Orlok effect✨ jk, but if you've seen the movie, you know what i'm talking about. nosferatu, the chasing scene, possession… not going to lie, i was struggling with those parts because of how conscious my breathing felt, which made the whole experience suffocating and dizzying. have you ever felt claustrophobic inside your own body?