#sobbing violently over this pic

[buckys-estrella]

just needed to share this pic with y’all

@fanboygarcia @rae-gar-targaryen thought you’d might like this🫶

[viartiart]

Since pride month is sadly ending, may I offer you some medieval fantasy lesbian ZoSan for the road?

[almostempty]

he knows (lucien x f!reader)

(lucien x f!reader) | wc: 3.2k | other fics | pic from here

UH HEY! I’m just gonna drop this here and scurry away to finish the other lucien one shot that i also started today, ….and then i’ll return to finishing divorced dad rock joel, and responding to all of the lovely people on here–but, like, i really just need this guy in the most emotionally unavailable and fuckable way, i hope one of y'all gets me

tags/warnings/thots: 18+/explicit, smut, toxic ex/fuckboy lucien, sex instead of communicating or processing emotions, angst but we fuckin’ and that’s the whole plot, we hit raw in my fics bc of my imaginary latex aversion or something, crying, biting, dom lucien vibes (? i never know when that’s the right tag), big dash of pls sexy man fuck the feelings away, tell me if there’s something i should add  

– no editing, no thinking, wrote this in a fever dream while staring at one of the new gifs all afternoon, idk his character! I haven’t watched anything! i just saw the chains and the face and let the horny devil in charge of my sole brain cell take the lead, aka he's my barbie, i was trying to challenge myself to just do something short like 1k- but, uhhhh it’s only 3! 

seeking feedback though (as always) so i can improve!! tell me all ur thots pls! 

“I know,” Lucien argues, “but I never meant to hurt you.” 

“I don’t care anymore.” You speak plainly. Small and quiet. Without conviction. Apathetic. Honest. 

“Anymore?” 

“Baby, please.” He looks at you with those stupid round eyes. He’s effortlessly put together like the wrinkles in his silk shirt were approved by a team of stylists to give him a hint of carelessness. Your incessant attraction to an emotionally unavailable man, it pulls you toward him like a bitter fate. Your therapist, Angie, says you need to learn how to find healthy attachment attractive, but if you shudder with disgust at the thought then what’s the point? 

“Just listen to me,” he continues, talking in circles. Apologizing without taking accountability. Explaining away everything. His behaviors, words, decisions. Apparently, he floats through life at the whim of others. Like one of those ugly deep sea creatures, he tempts you like a glowing lure in the dark. Your eyes glaze over, everything shifting out of focus as you dissociate in your living room. No matter how numb you are, he calls to you. 

You aren’t listening to the words. They don’t matter. It doesn’t matter if his tone is sincere or if it’s thick with flattery and empty promises. It’s more basic than that. Simple. The timbre of his voice. Unique to him. Imprinted in the chambers of your heart. A sharp ache spears through you, and something cracks. A fat, hot, tear escapes. With your shoulders drooping, staring at the ground, the tear falls, splashing on the floor. 

When you look up, meeting his eyes, it’s over. Lucien pulls you close, wrapping his heavy arms around your frame, bracing for the crescendo, keeping you steady. Tears stream endlessly, flooding down your cheeks, sticking to your face and his neck as you bury your face into his warm skin. He’s still trying to placate you, speaking nonsense, thinking he can comfort you. Thinking he knows why you’re upset. Thinking he understands you. 

When your therapist asked you to define love you had described it as being understood. Being seen. Being known. Being considered and prioritized. 

Lucien thinks he knows you. Thinks he understands you. Does he think he loves you? 

Following this line of thought hurts. Splitting you open, a raw beating heart, glistening, thumping, full of life, or a meal fresh and hot for a carnivore to tear into with its sharp fangs. Plump muscle, rich and dark, bleeding out, helpless. Snapping back into reality you shake, a violent sob racking your diaphragm as the pads of his fingers massage the back of your neck. Soothing. Coaxing. 

You want it sharper. Rough. Violent. Distracting. Painful. Anything. With wet lashes, swollen eyes, and ragged breath you become fixated. Licking the salty tears from the dip where his neck meets his shoulder, you can feel his muscles and tendons beneath the flesh. So human and alive. He strokes his hand down your spine, attempting to pacify you, but it sparks something lurid and ravenous, instead. 

You graze your teeth along his neck. “What are you doing?” he mutters the question over the top of your head. Maybe he does know you. “What do you need?” He growls, lowly, the hand he traces your spine with trails lower this time. He’s gluttonous and torrid. A hair-trigger to shift from his concern for your pain and the hole in your heart to a sordid desire to mollify you with his fingers and his cock. 

Maybe it’s a perversion, the tangled experience of despair and desire, the duet of anger and arousal, the sick escape using sex to skip over the emotional suffering. But it’s exactly what you want. It’s the root of the fucked up toxicity. Of everything wrong between you. He does know. He does understand. The same heat that flickers in your core sparks in his. 

Voracious and brash. You bite down, sinking your teeth into his neck, igniting a wildfire. An untamable beast. Again and again and again. Biting, sucking, kissing. His skin tender and raw, your lips wet and swollen. You run a hand along the back of his neck, tugging into his hair, anchoring your grip, and pulling a husky groan from his throat. 

“What do you need?” Lucien repeats, this time with a sharper edge. He detaches you from the safety of the crook of his neck. His two hands. Unnecessarily large, warm, and steady brace either side of your jaw, his fingers wrapping behind your neck. He holds you in front of his face. Vulnerable. Messy. Heat radiates from your cheeks. You release a shaky breath. 

“Don’t make me say it.” It’s a whisper. Pleading and demanding at the same time. 

The cocky smirk that spreads on his face is sickening. It makes you want to slap him, to hear the crack of your palm against his cheek. It makes you want to surrender. Soft and pliable, ready to please and earn praise. It makes you want to scream. To bite him so hard you draw blood. To fuck him until he can’t talk. 

You tell him all of it. Exactly what you need, what you want, what you refuse to say. You tell him all through your kiss. The hunger in your lips as you press them to his, the violence on your tongue, the desperate and vulnerable need to be cared for in the soft moans that rise from your chest, from your heart, from the blood in your veins. He chases all of it. The punishment and pleasure. 

He backs you into the kitchen, caging you against the counter like a scene from a movie. Impervious to whatever protest you make as he clears space, blindly sweeping his arm over the counter before lifting you onto it. The edge of the counter digs into your soft thighs, but it doesn’t matter. You’re ready to drown in the vanilla musk and bourbon-spiced scent of him. The bass in his voice that makes your eyes fall shut and your head tip back against the cupboard behind you. The bruising pressure of his grip that he knows you crave. 

“Baby,” he croons. His words are soft and gentle. As if he propped you on the counter to tend to your wounds. But his hands show no mercy. Roughly ridding you of your clothes. Dropping them into a pile on the floor. He’s ruthless with you. In ways you can’t be with yourself. In ways other lovers could never master. Harsh without being cruel. Deliberate without a plan. 

He lets you tug his shirt over his head. Skin to skin the intensity is primal. “Fuck,” is all you can manage to say. The heat is overwhelming, prickling your nerves and sharpening every sensation. Lucien toys with you like it’s his favorite game. Alternating. 

First, palming reverently at the flesh, sweeping his tongue over your hard nipples, and teasing the wet skin with his hot breath. 

You let him make the decisions. Take the lead. You’re done arguing, done thinking, done with the guilt of letting him in the door, done with acting like you’re any better than him. You brace yourself, one palm flat on the counter, the other resting on his shoulder. Taking whatever he gives. 

He switches up. Everything becomes pointed and precise. He sucks marks into your skin on the underside of your breasts. He pinches and flicks the pert bud of your straining nipples. The contact of his fingers, tongue, and teeth sends white-hot jolts of electricity straight to your cunt. He bites down hard enough to make you choke on a moan. Your whine fills the room, twisted with pain and pleasure. 

“You poor thing,” he purrs. Your face is still wet from your tears. But now they’re tears of frustration. “Just a mess.” You reach for his belt, impatient, but he stops you. He’s not done looking. He lifts one of your legs, propping your foot onto the counter and posing you obscenely in front of him. His gaze makes your pussy throb.

He’s torn. 

Studying your face. Everything unsaid in your eyes. The anguish and rage. The acerbic disdain. The nearly imperceptible longing. 

Admiring your sex, spread open for him. Shining with your arousal. Swollen, slick lips so sensitive for him. Your core, fluttering with anticipation, achingly empty without him. 

He holds your chin between his thumb and curled forefinger. His eyes swirl with lust and something you can’t quite place. “You have no idea,” he rasps. “No idea how much it fucking kills me to see you like this. And knowing I’m the reason why.” 

You don’t know if he means it breaks his heart to see the way you suffer or if he means the sight of you dripping on the counter has him so hard it hurts. You don’t know which you’d believe anyway. He’s not hard up to find someone else to torment or to fuck. That thought makes your throat dry. 

“I can’t stay away from you,” he traces his fingers down your soft inner thigh, closer and closer to where you need him. “How could I?” You tip your head to the side, your limbs and head feel heavy, drunk on a cocktail of everything you love and hate about him all at once. 

“Then don’t.” 

Your reply makes him smile again. He’s so handsome when he smiles it’s infuriating. “You could scream at me, kick me out, hate me–but you still let me touch you, you need me to touch you. Why do I love that so much?” 

“You like feeling important.” You let your snarky comment out without thinking. His question was definitely rhetorical. A few emotions flicker across his face before, a dark little smirk curls the corner of his mouth. 

He feeds off of your challenge. “There she is.” 

“I never left,” you snap, frustration spilling over. He laughs, loose and easy. 

“Listen to me,” Lucien says, low and velvety. Subduing you with the tension and proximity. “I know. You want me to use you. Like you’re my toy. Until you can’t keep those beautiful eyes open.”

“Yes.” 

“I know.” He echoes. Then he closes the gap, kissing you with affection. Holding himself back, but you aren’t reserved. You’re greedy; you want it harder. He just said he’d ruin you, why is he being so gentle? He pulls back with something sincere in his eyes. A whimper falls from your lips, pouty and baffled. 

“Gonna fuck you like I’m trying to ruin you, baby.” 

You narrow your eyes at him. Sometime soon, hopefully? You don’t snap again, answering with another yes. 

He leans in, breath fanning hot over your ear. “But, we both know that tonight you’re the one using me. Ruining me. I’m your toy.” 

Your breath hitches at that. You mouth I know in response, not even able to whisper it. He doesn’t need to hear you say it. He nips your ear lobe and you loose a surprised cry before gasping out his name. 

He’s swift now. Purposeful. Undoing his belt, shoving his pants down and revealing his cock. Reflexively your hips tense and shift. Just looking makes you salivate. He runs his thumb over the bead of precome, drawing it along his length. 

He knows how you want it. His fingers can coax you to an orgasm in no time, but you don’t want that. You want the resistance, the stretch, the dull ache, and intensity as your muscles work to let him in deeper. Nobody makes you feel the way he does. Full. Complete. Mindless. 

It could be pornographic, vulgar, raunchy. The way he pushes your inner thigh further open with one hand while he uses the other to languidly stroke himself. The way he grips himself so tightly like he’s punishing himself. The way his jaw hangs slack and he mutters under his breath about how badly you need him. 

To you, however, it’s a profound admission. A candid confession. The more he goads you the more it solidifies that he’s the one that needs you. That it flows so easily from him because he’s really talking about himself. 

“You say you don’t care anymore, but look at you now, baby.” He shifts closer, at counter height you’re aligned perfectly. He glides the head of his cock up and down the folds of your soaked cunt. You shudder and moan, mesmerized by the sight. 

“It’s almost sad how much you need me, like you can’t breathe without this,” he keeps talking. 

He demands that you watch, as if there was a chance you could stop, as he lines up and sinks into you. You groan in unison. You’re so tight, he draws back out. Repeating the same motion, feeding his cock into you deeper and deeper each time. Your hot, plush walls pulse around him, adjusting. When he finally meets the end of you, he hums, pleased. “You feel that?” 

You bob your head, nodding, agreeing. “Yes.” Your voice is breathy. “Perfect.” You grind against him as if you could take him any deeper, begging him to move with your needy display. It’s wholly overwhelming as is, every nerve within you alight as his cock kicks within you, tensing with the same craving to move. 

He takes your hand in his, nestling your fingers around him. Somehow he feels even larger than he looks, like he shouldn’t be able to fit inside of you, but here you are feeling it and seeing it for yourself. Slowly, Lucien tilts his hips, almost pulling out of you completely before plunging in with force. He keeps up the tantalizing pace, guiding you to touch yourself. He watches your fingers with rapt attention, bracing a hand on your hip to keep you in place as he drives into you with another snap of his hips that edges you closer. 

He gradually speeds up, a master at tempering his desire. Your hip flexor aches as you hold yourself in place but it doesn’t matter. You find your rhythm as he holds steady at a pace that has him landing brutal thrusts that force the words out of your lungs. Soft oh’s and fuck’s pour out of you, under your breath, adding fuel to the fire blazing between you. 

Lucien savors your chanting and the image of you fixed in place, taking him eagerly. Your fingers move with urgency, chasing the release that looms closer and closer. Your mind is blissfully blank, reduced to something animalistic, removed from the burden of your history. “Don’t stop,” you plead, “I’m so close.” 

He doesn’t stop. He fucks you at the same pace, all the way through it. As you contract around him, when everything pulls taut and snaps within you, crying out his name, when it’s too sensitive and you whip your hand away, and as you shudder and breathe deeper and deeper. As the ache in your legs from being spread wide open returns and your ass feels numb where the edge of the counter digs into your flesh. Another tear spills from the corner of your eye, but you can’t say what it’s from anymore. 

When you fidget, he stops moving, letting you readjust. A sheen of sweat glistens all over your chest and you’re suddenly acutely aware of how loud the slick noises between you are. How easy it is to get lost in Lucien's hot and heavy magnetism. You know you were falling apart before he propped you up on the counter, but you’re sure you’re a complete wreck now. 

Lucien pulls out but then leans against you, pinning the length of his cock between you, hot, slick, and messy against your sweat-damp skin. He floods your senses, all you can see, hear, and smell. Caging you in his hand find a possessive hold on you, one wrapped around the back of your neck, one wrapped tight around your thigh as you hitch it around his hip. 

“You feel good?” he asks. You hum in agreement. You do feel good. You know he’s not done yet, and smile wide, still hungry for more. “How good?” he asks and you know there’s something coming next. 

“So good.” You trail a hand between you, drawing a line down his chest and back up to cradle his cheek in your palm. Something about the prickle of his facial hair along your palm feels so natural, domestic, and sweet. You’re tempted to kiss his cheek, nuzzle against his ear, and ask him to take you to bed. But you can’t. You’ll never have that. Instead, you bait him. “I think you’re holding back though, I know you can fuck me harder than that.” 

He scoffs, unamused, blowing a hot puff of air between you. His fingers dig deeper into your thigh, applying the kind of pressure that stirs arousal low in your belly. 

The dark glint in his eye gives you butterflies. “I will, Baby,” his rumbling voice is innately sensual, but the condescension in his tone makes you tingly. You’re so close to him that you can feel his heart beating in his chest, you can feel the same pulse thrumming in his cock, still flush against you as he slants his lower half along yours. He’s all things heavy and firm, strong and sculpted, yet fitting so naturally against you. You need more, wriggling and squirming against him, you can’t contain the restlessness. 

“You know,” he says slowly, drawing your eyes back to his. “You can keep trying to move on, but no one else will ever know you like this. No one else will ever ruin you the way I do. You can tell me you don’t care anymore, but you’ll never let anyone else in the way you let me. They won’t touch that part of you, the one that’s mine—because it’ll always be mine.” 

It trickles through you slowly until your blood feels like it’s boiling. They’re tears of anger now. It’s like a sick double entendre. 

“I know,” your words are steeped in every emotion cascading through you. 

You don’t know if it’s worse that he’s right. That there’s a Lucien-shaped mark imprinted on your heart that will never fade. Or if it’s worse that he doesn’t even know it applies to him just the same. That he always comes back because he’s trying to fill the same void. 

Maybe he does know. Maybe he does know and this is all he can do to make it up to you. 

Maybe that’s why he leads you to your bedroom and lives up to his word. 

Why he fucks you so hard you see stars. Why he doesn’t stop even after he comes deep inside of you with a possessive always gonna be mine. Why he litters your skin with more false promises and confessions. Why he gives you so many orgasms you lose track. 

Maybe that’s why he’s still there when the sun starts to peek through your window. Why he fucks you slowly when you’re too tender and exhausted to take him any harder until you’re floating in limbo between a dream and reality. Why he stays there, just cradling your back into his chest and listening to the rhythm of your breath. 

Maybe he does know. 

PLEASE COME YELL WITH ME ABOUT THIS FICTIONAL GUY BC I NEED HIM IN A SUPER NORMAL WAY or tell me if my writing was incoherent or if you can't relate to the toxic ex that is still the best fuck of your life (cruel and twisted fr)

dividers by @/cyberangel-graphics

tags for the babes that let me annoy them with my thots <3

@lovely-vamp-princess @gothcsz @auteurdelabre @adoreyouusugar @swankyorange @itwasntimethatdidit40 @ivoryandflame

@magneticecstasy @indiegirlunited @syd-djarin

[dazed--xx]

SKZ Reaction: He hurts the reader II (Hyung Line)

A/N: this is for @slayhyunjin one of my favorite followers and I’d like to say a friend now. Merry Christmas hun you wanted them to make up and I did what I could but please remember in part one Minho was a Yandere so his is technically a good ending in his mind but I will have the Maknae line out soon so get the cutest most fluffy Jeongin pics ready cause that was what was promised 😭😂 but anyway I hope y’all enjoy this and it makes y’all a little happy to see that I’m alive and still writing.

Masterlist Part 1

Chan:

Your phone had been ringing off the charts since you had left your shared apartment with Chan. You stared at the waves of the ocean as the sea breeze kissed your tear stained cheeks. Your fear had dwindled in the hours you had been sitting here on this empty beach. You bite your lip, maybe you did misunderstand. You knew Chan almost better than you knew yourself; which is why you know he’d never cheat on you. You know that she probably did fall or even if she purposely fell Chan was probably innocently helping her up because that’s the type of person he is. Well, you thought he was…that is until that lamp whipped past your head and was sent crashing against the wall. Guilt filled you as you remembered the way Chan pleaded with you not to go. He knew you had nowhere to stay, you weren’t from South Korea though you had lived here for almost 5 years it wasn’t easy for you to make friends as a foreigner wether you fit in or not. You didn’t fit with most of the things that happened around you in this country and without your relationship with Chan though, living here was apart of your dreams growing up, you would have never made the leap into moving here without him and his support. Tears filled your eyes once again as you remembered the only people you have to talk to would probably immediately send Chan over to your location. You hate yourself for wishing he was actually here, you hate how much you feel like you need his insight in what you should do but you did know he’d probably think of an answer logically without including his own emotions into whatever advice he’d give you. You sigh heavily as you lift yourself from the sand and make your way back to your car. Your phone in hand as the special ringtone you had set for Chan blared through the speaker. You almost chuckle to yourself at the irony; he finally called you right after you thought about how much you needed his help. You were relieved to see the comforting texts from his members after they had called but for those few hours you had been gone Chan hadn’t once called you. Pressing the green button you lift the phone to your ear hesitantly as you sit yourself in the drivers seat. .

You almost let out a sob as you heard his tear laced voice ring through your phone “Y-Y/N?” He questioned as he sniffled. You hear him struggling to catch his breath between his sobs “Y/N if you’re there you don’t have to say anything but please just listen..” he pleads, you could tell he was trying to calm his breathing “I-I’m so sorry, I know what you saw with that trainee looked really really bad…b-but I swear I don’t even know that girl. She is—was just a backup dancer for the Case 143 concept but since she made you and me uncomfortable we all agreed she can work with Itzy or Twice.” Your heart clenches at his caring nature which is why the girl still had a job in the first place. “But Her actions and my behavior wasn’t okay and I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that and I don’t want to make any excuses like I was angry because that doesn’t make it okay. I should have never gotten that violent, I should have just let you cool off and came to talk to you when we both had calmed down and. For that I’m so sorry and if you don’t want to be with me anymore I’d completely understand honestly I think you shouldn’t be with me anymore because what I did isn’t okay and I know that and i deserve for you to leave—ITS NOT LIKE YOU HIT ME OR ANYTHING!” You exclaim almost fuming at the way he was describing himself “it doesn’t matter. What I did was wrong and I don’t want you to justify it either. I was wrong to do that it makes me sick to my stomach knowing I could have really hurt you. Thank god I didn’t but what if I did? I wasn’t paying attention Y/N you could have gotten seriously hurt what would have happened if it hit you—but it didn’t” you cut him off once again, as tears rolled down your cheeks “Chan are you breaking up with me?” You hear a whimper release from his lips “Why would you want to be with a guy that almost hurt you physically?” He questions “you even said you wanted to get your stuff and leave me because of all this” he cries “why wouldn’t I want to protect you even if it’s from myself? I love you more than anything in this world and that’s why I don’t want you to forgive me because the idea of you getting hurt by my own hand makes me disgusted I can’t even look at you without feeling like shit knowing I really fucked this up” your heart cracks at the pain and guilt laced in his tone “you want to know why I do want to forgive you?” You ponder “You do?” He asks bewildered you give yourself a small sad smile before answering “yes, because if you were really the type to hurt me physically you wouldn’t feel like breaking up would be the best option, you think about things rationally and always put how I feel or could possibly feel first. You genuinely show that you care about me and it makes me know you’re a genuinely good person and that’s why I love you that’s why I want to be with you. Things were…intense to say the least but I do want to work things out soon maybe not today maybe not tomorrow but I do want to work things out with you and move on from this with you as your girlfriend” the line goes silent for a second “okay..b-but can I ask you something?” He asks hesitantly “yeah anything..” you reply instantly. “C-can we move on from this with you as my fiancé? I really didn’t want to propose like this but I really really want to marry you and I can’t imagine us breaking up without me at least asking you s-so that y-you do know my intentions” You can hear the hesitation and love in his words the question really throws you for a loop “C-can I answer you when I’m ready to come talk? I do want to be with you but I’d like to be proposed to properly I don’t want to remember the way we got engaged like this even though the answer is and will always be yes but for right now it’s a maybe later I love you Channie I’ll see you in couple days I promise..” you reply lovingly. You can almost hear the smile on his lips as he responds “I’d wait for you forever don’t worry I’ll see you soon my love and I’ll do it right next time I promise..”

Minho:

The smell of mildew filled your nose, the feeling of your bed is different. Your eyes are burning as they adjust to the fluorescent light, your eyes widen in shock. This isn’t your room. You look around in a panic as you throw the foreign blanket off you. You look around the room, you didn’t see a single window. The only furniture that was there was the bed you were seated on and a chair across the room facing where you were once sleeping. Where were you? You lift yourself from the bed and make your way toward the door, noticing your lack of pants and shoes you rush toward the door trying to twist and pull on the knob before slamming your fist into it repeatedly “HELLO?! HELLO?! IS ANYONE THERE?” You call as you continue to pound your fist on the door. Panic filling your body in a tidal wave you hear footsteps coming toward you “HELLO?! Who’s there?! PLEASE HELP ME!” You hear the person stop infront of the door as you try to open it again. “Hello?!” You call once more to the stranger finally realizing how much of a bad idea it was. You had no clue who was on the other side of that door. It could be the person that put you here. Were they going to hurt you? What did they want? You questioned to yourself, bile rose in your throat as you heard the slight ‘click’ from the lock and see the knob turn “W-wait!” You shout the door doesn’t move “A-are you going to hurt me?” You question pressing your ear to the door only to hear silence in return “please answer me” you plead the stranger knocks once “d-does that mean yes?” You question fear filling your tone. They knock once again “Does that mean no?” You hear two knocks in response “O-Okay…why am I here? Where am I?” You hear a heavy sigh on the other side of the door before they force it open.

Your eyes widen in shock and relief washes over you, as you’re greeted by your boyfriend. “Minho!” You exclaim tears almost streaming down your face as you rush over to him and wrap your arms around his neck burying your face in his neck “Thank god! Why did you do that why didn’t you answer me I’m so scared right now and you couldn’t just tell me what was going on? What happened why am I here how’d I get here? Where are my clothes?” You question as you pull back noticing the stoic expression on his face “I took them” he states matter of factly. “W-why?” You question slowly removing yourself from from him “so you can’t leave of course” he smiles sinisterly. Your mouth hanging open in shock “what? You did this to me so I can’t leave?” He smiles once more the light that always sat in his eyes now gone their almost soulless. “Min what’s going on? Something seems off” you question nervously as you take a step back away from him “you think it’s okay to break up with me? I think it’s quite okay that I prevent that. You told me to not come back to see you anymore. I can’t just let that happen, it’s okay you just have to stay here; I’ll take care of you baby, don’t worry.” He says taking a small step toward you as he placed a pout on his lips “can’t you hug me again? I wasn’t ready so I really didn’t get to hold you like I wanted” his hand caresses your cheek “what do you mean I just have to stay here? What about my apartment? My job? My friends and family?” You question. Minho smiles sickeningly “That’s the best part baby everyone already thinks you’re either dead or missing at the very least. It’s okay I made everything look very believable and it won’t be linked to me or anything I am really sorry that I did have to collect your blood a little, I know you’re scared of needles that’s why I put those pills in your drink so you would sleep through it cause I know you’d be scared but, because I needed everyone to think you’d died in the ordeal but you can’t even feel it can you? I really did a great job right baby? Now we can be together and nothing is wrong anymore everything is fine. I mean it will suck to have to act really sad around my members knowing you’re alive but I have to so they don’t think something is wrong didn’t I do good baby? I’ll always do great things for you and now you can be free from those burdens, I’ll take care of you. You can live here it’s a house I know about that’s underground you can walk around it as you like. I’m sorry I locked you in here but you were sleeping and I didn’t want you to possibly sleep walk or anything because that was one of the side effects—you’re fucking crazy” you cut him off in shock at his admissions. “What the hell is wrong with you?” You growl. Fear grows in your stomach as his façade drops the smile quickly gone from his lips turning into a straight line.

“Fine then I guess you can’t go around as you like. And if you try to run I’ll cut your Achilles tendon look I don’t want to have to do it this way but you’re not giving me a choice so go lay on your bed and think about what you said to me and fucking fix it when I come back with food for you. I love you so I don’t want to have to leave you in here for too long, but I am an Idol you know? things like random world tours can come up and be there for months on end so who would take care of you if I decide to leave you here while I go? Either figure out if you want to be truly like the old you and die in a bloody gory death. If you be good and listen to me like you used to then I’ll be just as good to you. I don’t want to hurt you nor does the idea appeal me honestly it makes me nauseous but I’ll do what I have to. Be good lay down and just let me love you the way only I can. There’s no one else for you anyway it’s us for the rest of our lives babe and if you have a problem with that, well I’ll take Stockholm Syndrome even if it’s your own brain tricking you into loving me again just so you can dissociate from this. I’ll take it but if you act like this again we will have an issue.” He threatens tilting his head to the side taking a step toward you “Do you want there to be an issue?” You shake your head in response “O-of course not, Min I-I was just surprised by what you said. I’m just mad you had to use a needle on me but I really appreciate all the effort you went through, y-you did well I promise. Im not mad at you im sorry for trying to break up with you I won’t ever do it again but Min I don’t want to stay here let me go with you.” You force out, you felt like throwing up at the softness of your tone. “I’m sorry baby you have to stay here but if you’re really not mad come here give me a kiss let me hold you.” You pout at his words “p-please min I don’t want to be left here don’t leave me here please I’ll be good ill listen to your rules can’t I just be with you all the time? C-can’t I just live with you? I’m scared please Min” you plead, you felt disgusted with yourself begging him but you could tell he’s unstable and you didn’t know what he was truly capable of but you knew this was not going to end well if you didn’t listen to him. Bringing yourself closer to him you place your lips on his feeling his arms wrap around you and you could almost pretend like things were how they used to be.

Changbin:

Waking up in a panic you look around the room, almost worrying when you didn’t find Changbin sleeping beside you. The events from the night previous replay in your mind as you lift yourself from the bed. A sharp sting spreads throughout your back. You groan in pain, the door shooting open at the sound. “Y/N, are you okay?” Changbin rushes into the room in a frenzy. You stare at him bewildered, “yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?” You question almost sarcastically. You finally notice his disheveled state, the ghost of the trails of tears that streamed down his face. The scabs and bruises on his knuckles, you’re eyes widen in shock seeing his hands. Almost like a reflex you rush out of bed and grab his hand “What happened?!” You question worriedly taking his hand in yours .“I’m an asshole….” He states with a pout on his lips. “What? What happened to your hand Binnie? Are you okay?” He removes his hand from your grasp. “I’m a disgusting person…I was mad that I-sigh- I was mad that I hurt you s-so I punched the wall” you’re eyes widen “YOU PUNCHED THE WALL?!” You exclaim. “I fixed it after I made a hole in it. I have to paint it but it’s fixed” he murmurs. “DO YOU REALLY THINK I CARE ABOUT THAT FUCKING WALL? ILL DEMOLISH IT IF I WANTED TO WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?” You growl at him anger growing in your gut at the idea of him hurting himself. “I deserved it.” He states matter of factly. “Honestly I deserve worse. I’m sorry, but when you were sleeping I checked on your back and put some ointment on it but it’s a really big bruise. S-seeing it….I wanted to die. I hate myself for doing that to you. I got really mad at myself and it just happened. I’m so sorry, you don’t understand how much I said it when you were sleeping but I need you to know I’m really sorry and that it won’t happen again because-sigh-Y/N I think we should break up.” He sobs. You stare at him. “What? You want to break up? W-why? I won’t be clingy or harass you anymore I love you I don’t want to break up” you cry.

It was his turn to be shocked “Y/N I hurt you. I gave you a huge bruise on your back. I put my hands on you which is something I never thought I’d do. I can’t be with you knowing I did that and honestly I’m disappointed you would just let it go. Don’t make excuses for me, don’t try to justify it because there is no justification. I can’t redeem myself from this—yes you can—No I can’t you may be able to forgive me but I won’t be able to forgive myself. Look at your back Y/N! Actually fucking look at it I look like a domestic abuser. It makes me fucking sick!” He snaps. Your heart feels like it’s being ripped right from your chest and dangled infront of you. “Bin I love you I don’t want to break up we can figure things out. We can fix this. My back will heal” you go to grab his hand again “but the trauma from it won’t. Not right away.” He states sadly as he takes a step back. You let out a whimper “please we can work through this I love you. I know you’re going to be disappointed that I want to forgive you. But look at you right now I know you wouldn’t do it again you look like you hate yourself right now. You are beating yourself up already why would I pour salt on that wound I’m sorry but you’re not breaking up with me I’m the one that got hurt I’m the one with the bruise on my back so I’m the one that gets to make this decision and we’re not breaking up.” You see the disappointment on his face “Y/N.—no we’re not breaking up if that’s what you want to say then I don’t want to hear it” you argue placing your hands on your ears. A pout etched onto your lips as you stare at him with tear filled eyes. You shake your head at him. A small sad smile spreads across his lips. “Okay. You win we won’t break up. Im happy you’re quite stubborn and strong willed when it comes to people you love. But I am disappointed you would forgive someone that hurt you physically…” His tone is soft and caring. You feel the anxiety of a break up dwindling as you wrap your arms around Changbins neck placing soft kisses against his cheek. “I love you, you’ll forgive yourself in time with me by your side okay?”

Hyunjin:

“It’s just a sprain. Rest it for 48 hours and take your anti-inflammatory. And keep the splint on for a week or two as it is only a Grade 1 sprain. Come back if the pain gets any worse or if it seems like the swelling isn’t going down.” The doctor informed as he handed you your discharge paperwork. You nod along before making your way out of the hospital. You’re not excited about going home, the drive here was excruciatingly painful but at least your wrist is splinted. You couldn’t believe how Hyunjin reacted. How could he hurt you like that? The thought of the events earlier in the afternoon made you fee nauseous, how could the guy you loved for the past year choose his crazy ‘best friend’ over you? You had allowed Yerim’s antics to go on for too long based on her friendship with Hyunjin. Pulling into your driveway you’re quite pissed to see Hyunjins car still there. Meaning they were both still here. Your blood boiled as you forced yourself out of your car locking it behind you as you make your way to the door. Before you could enter your code into the pad, the door is forced open. You’re greeted with the sight of a disheveled Hyunjin. Tears streaming down his face, his sobs growing worse and worse with the glare you had directed at him. You roll your eyes as you shove past him, seeing his suitcase that was once under your bed now in the living room right beside the couch a complete lack of Yerims presence lingered. “W-wait! Please…” his whimpers between his sniffles as he wipes his face on his sleeves. “Wait for what Hyunjin? You weren’t supposed to be here when I got back remember? It seems your friend knows how to listen properly but you can’t.” You growl your mouth pulled into a harsh line, as you clenched your jaw. “I-I know but how could I just leave? I tried okay? I tried to listen to you I packed my stuff even though I didn’t want to I just—I couldn’t leave knowing you’re hurt. I couldn’t leave knowing that I may never get to see you again and I know it’s selfish but I have to try to fix this. I didn’t know what Yerim said but if it’s anything like what she tried to do then I’m sorry I never realized. I’m sorry I never knew the things Yerim did to you…b-but I do now! I swear I know the truth now and I’m sorry I should have never pushed you I should have listened to what happened.. a-and I would have probably done worse to Yerim if she said the things to me that she said to you.” He cries as he makes his way over to you stopping right infront of you he tries to caress your cheek. You flinch at his action, and a pout forms on his lips as he hesitantly places his hand back at his side “how’d you find out?” You question your eyes finally meeting his “cause there’s a reason I never told you”

His eyebrows scrunch together “does it matter how I found out? And why? Why would never tell me? How long has she been harassing you with that bullshit because that’s what it is. It’s bullshit! I never once slept with her. I never once told her I loved her, she was my best friend and I saw her like a sister and when she tried to throw herself on me when you had left I just lost my shit and realized what was going on.” He explained with tears streaming down his face. A heavy sigh is released from his lips and his current state is enough to send your heart into the morgue. “Jinnie—She was fucking pissed that I supposedly was choosing you over her but she doesn’t realize how many times you probably feel like I chose her over you. You should have told me but that doesn’t excuse what I did to you and I’m so fucking sorry Y/N. I really am, a-and if you let me I’ll make it up to you. Yerim is gone she’s out of my life she means nothing to me if she could try to ruin something that she knows I’ve dedicated myself to. She knew I wanted to marry you. She came with me to pick the ring for when I proposed but in the end even her attempts didn’t ruin anything. You knew she was bullshitting. In the end, I ruined everything but I will fix it. I’ll make it up to you I want to be with you I love you and I’m so fucking sorry” He cut you off dropping to his knees and holding your good hand in both of his “if you forgive me for this it will never happen again. I’m so sorry that I pushed you. I’m so sorry I let my anger get the better of me because you are right I heard her tell you those things and I heard you defend me and I don’t know I couldn’t think and I got mad. But if it makes you feel any better I pushed her too probably a lot worse than I pushed you and I told her I want nothing to do with her anymore I think she got the message cause she slapped the shit out of me and left” you’re eyes widen at his confession your hand instinctively lifting his face inspecting his cheek seeing the fading red mark. “I’ll fucking kill her she did what?!” You growl “she hit you?” You rush past him grabbing your keys only to be halted by Hyunjin grabbing your hand “it’s fine I deserved it for what I did to you” he comforts, your eyebrows raise “yeah and if anyone deserves to hit you it’d be me not her and I didn’t nor would I want to hit you let alone allow some slut to do the same thing to MY boyfriend. Don’t try to stop me cause I’m going to fuck her up Hyunjin” you notice the way his face lit up “Am I?” You shake your head at him in confusion “are you what?” He bites his lip as he stared at the ground “Am I still your boyfriend? What I did was really really bad…and I don’t feel like I deserve to call myself that anymore since you told me to leave” you look at him feeling a little guilty, whilst you did indeed tell him to pack his shit and leave you are kind of relieved he didn’t listen. While you didn’t enjoy the fact that he pushed you, his loyalty and the love he has for the people around him is what drew you to him in the first place. If Yerim wasn’t such a bitch and didn’t antagonize the issue then this wouldn’t have happened and yes, while he shouldn’t have pushed you he thought he was protecting his childhood friend.

“I’d like to think you still are…I-if you still want to be—more than anything I want to be your boyfriend more than I want to be an idol at this very moment” he cuts you off looking at you with hope. You bite your bottom lip and wrap your arms around his neck. You hear a sigh of relief release from his throat as he holds you against him as if you’d disappear when he let go. “Thank god….I love you so much I’m so sorry you won’t regret this I promise” he cries as he buries his face in your neck. You smile slightly pulling your head back to look at your sad puppy of a boyfriend pressing your lips against his. He kisses you passionately before you pull away “But if I ever see Yerim it’s on sight. She doesn’t have the right to put her hands on you just for rejecting her. She’s going to get her ass whooped and you won’t be able to stop me…”

[hearts-4-vicky]

thinking abt Giselle tying up g!p reader to the bed and sitting on your face! Gigi would have to tie your waist down to the bed bc you can’t stop humping the air trying to find any type of release. Gigi would be so mean, suffocating you with her pussy while she degrades you and tells you that you’re not doing it right! Tears would be falling down your cheeks as you mumble out a barely audible apology while you were tongue fucking her hole and sucking on her clit. She would tell you it’s okay because you’re just her dumb baby! When she finally cums in your mouth and all over your face, you feel like you were in heaven! Your eyes rolled back and you came untouched, making a mess of your pelvis! When she got off your face you would tell her thank you with her slick and cum smeared over your face, Gigi would call you a pervert for cumming untouched :( She would stuff your mouth with her lactating tits and ride your overstimulated cock until you were shooting blanks!!

anon, angel, do u wanna kiss????🙏CUZ UR MIND OH MY GOD

warnings: dom! aeri, sub! g!p reader, mommy kink, aeri being mean :(, aeri being kinda nice towards the end?, squirting, overstimulation, face sitting, pussy eating, aeri slaps ur balls, cum eating, lactation, reader is a loser, A BIG LOSER, reader is stupid reader is sensitive asf😭, reader sobs cuz shes a stupid sensitive loser, (y am i bashing reader 🙏💀) pregnancy mentions, aeri takes pics

i feel like gigi would come outta nowhere, full on naked, n ur dick just JUMPS but like cant even blame u🙏 her tits would be leakin a bit, pussy WET n u cant even react bc she just rips off ur clothes n tying u to her bed posts!!!!!! ur so confused cuz shes never did smth like this b4?? “aeri what the fu-“ “shut up whore, its mommy to you.” and suddenly ur mouth is shut (only open to eat mommys pussy😘) and ur thinkin w/ ur dick😝 aeri gets on the bed, pussy hovering over ur face with ur mouth still shut tight, not knowing what to do?? finally, her pussy meets ur lips n u do… nothing??? youve never been with a girl before, only watching twitter porn videos (you can only watch 15 secs b4 ur cock just explodes 💥💥💥💥💥) getting impatient aeri brings one of her hands to your jaw, forcing u to open ur mouth n shes suffocating u with her puffy pussy, grindin on ur mouth, plushy thighs barely able to block out the sounds of aeris moans😍 “Use your- ah- tongue stupid bitch” (im giggling i want her so bad) stickin ur tongue in n out gets aeri to let out a satisfied sigh but she takes notice of the precum leakin out ur tip n starts giggling???

UGHHHH aeri would js be so MEAN to u

“You getting off to this slut? Mommy hasn’t even touched you and you’re already close? Fucking pathetic.” aeri leans over to give your balls a few hard slaps, stopping when ur cock begins to twitch🥺 she moves her hand to the place where your shaft meets your tip and has a firm grip on it, making you whimper and start to sob “You’re stupid if you think you’re gonna cum before me” aeri moans out as she starts to grind harder on your mouth😝 you’re sobbing so loudly now bc ur overwhelmed n aeri is jst being mean to u:((( but ur sobs n whines send vibrations to aeris core n she squirts all over ur face!!!🥺🥺🥺 so focused into her orgasm she lets go of your dick and you cum so violently, humping the air, getting your cum everywhere

aeri gets off you, letting you speak “‘m sorry mommy! p-please! please don’ leave your slut! wan’ taste m-mommy’s milk please….” you sob out, giving into your mommy so easily🥺🥺 aeri doesnt respond as she turns around, slams down on your cock, bouncing up and down quickly, shoving her leakin nipples in your needy mouth🥺 and yeah! she does fuck you til ur shooting blanks into her warm pussy🥺! but since you’re cummin so much she teases you “You, fuck- want mommy to get pregnant baby? You gonna share mommys milk with our baby?” your eyes widen, shaking ur head thats trapped in her tits to protest “Words, baby, mommy wants to hear you use your words” aeri whispers to you, never slowing down her pace❤️ she pulls you away from her spit soaked tits so you can answer “no mommy! don’ wanna- mmh!share your boobs with no one else!!” cumming in the middle of your sentence was so embarrassing for you but aeri didnt care that much💋 she gets off your overstimulated cock, causing you to whine loudly “Oh yeah? With how many times you came in me theres no way we aren’t parents yet. If only there was some way to prevent that…” she trails off before climbing back up so her pussy is near your face again. “Maybe you should be a good little slut and eat your cum out of mommy’s pussy.” aeri smirks seeing you nod vigorously, so cute, all for her🥺

“Good girl” is all aeri needs to say before sitting on your face again, you’re so eager to eat her again! even if you’re eating your own cum in the process!! aeri can’t help but snap a few pics of you being so pussy drunk and sends them to the aespa group chat🥺 not even a minute goes by before she gets a notification from the gc,

“Aeri-unnie, can we share her? please?:(“

“Ofc ning❤️ come home quick k?”

I WAMT HER SO ABDF OH MY GOD ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY

anyway first ask done😍❤️

bye my loves stay safe💋💋💋

[starlost-mochi-x]

reader x changbin with some angst involving readers birthday (like people forgetting) and binnie comforting them

here you go anon <3 also i couldn't find matching header pics but whatever (don't look at it for too long and it'll be fine)

lamplight - seo changbin

pairing: seo changbin x reader

summary: your friends forget your birthday and changbin finds out

genre: fluff, idol! au, angsty, reader cries a lot, sad boi hours, not proofread as per usual

a/n: comments, likes, reblogs appreciated <3 divider from @wonjuii

You huff and slide down the closed door, trying to fight the tears welling in your eyes. The bedroom is dimly lit, the only source of light coming from the lamp in the corner, and a cast of warm, golden light spills onto the surfaces in the room.

It's a cool night, it's raining heavily outside, and Changbin is home with you. Your schedules are free and you're off work for the weekend too. These combined things should have made you happy, but instead you felt as if you were the most insignificant, useless person in the entire world.

Unimportant, unappreciated, unloved.

You can hear Changbin pacing down the hallway, muttering something frantically to himself in Korean. You know he's worrying about whether he did something wrong, and it only makes you feel worse; that he's upset, and that he was trying to take care of you when you got home, but you had shoved him aside and slammed the bedroom door behind you without so much as a hello to him.

You were just so upset about how your friends forgot your birthday and it made you forget about the one person who cared more about you than anyone else in the entire world.

A fresh wave of guilty tears pools up in your eyes and you clap a hand over your mouth to muffle the sobs, squeezing your eyes shut as if it'll somehow alleviate the crushing pain in your chest. How could you have hurt him like that?

There's a gentle knocking at the door and you jolt, accidentally slamming your elbow back into the solid surface. Groaning quietly, you cradle your arm in your hand and try to quieten your crying.

"Jagiya?" Changbin asks timidly from the other side of the door. "Please open the door, I can hear you crying."

You sniff and wipe a sleeve across your nose, scrunching your face up in mild disgust at the wet trail it leaves behind. "I'm not crying."

You hear a gentle sigh and the sound tweaks at your heartstrings, knowing Changbin can see right through your feeble, defenseless lie.

"Jagi, I could hear you crying from down the hallway. I didn't mean to make you upset, I just want to hold you. Please open the door?"

You sigh sadly and sniff one more time before crouching and opening the door. Changbin's knelt on the other side, the line of the threshold the only thing separating you two. You look up at him, feeling like a watery, pathetic mess, and all Changbin does is smile softly, the action making your heart flutter even through your sadness.

You lean forward and crash into his arms.

He holds you like that for a while, only moving to sit against the bed with you on his lap. He doesn't say anything, just quietly shushes you and rocks you, stroking your hair and wiping your tears. After your sobs quieten down, you look up at him.

"I'm sorry I brushed you off when I came home, it's just-"

He shushes you gently. "It's okay, I could tell you had a bad day."

You shake your head violently, feeling regretful and guilty. Changbin cups your cheeks with his warm, slightly calloused hands and kisses the tip of your nose.

"What happened, jagi?" he murmurs.

You sigh. "My friends forgot my birthday."

Changbin laughs incredulously, shifting you in his lap and sitting more upright. "Who dares forgot my jagiya's birthday, huh? I want names!"

"Binnie-"

"Jagi, if they forgot your birthday then they're not your friends, okay? Dump them," he settles back against the bed, tucking a stray lock of hair behind your ear.

You frown, sniffing quietly. "But didn't you forget Minho's birthday a while ago? How come he hasn't dumped you?"

Changbin laughs again, the high-pitched cackle making your mouth tweak at the corners. "Because we're in the same group with the guys," he flexes his muscles, "and besides, I have appearances to keep up with."

You giggle and lean against his chest. Changbin leans down and kisses your forehead, speaking quieter but with a grin.

"Speaking of Minho and the guys, they're coming in half an hour to celebrate, so go and get dressed and look all pretty, okay? I bought you something, it's hanging on the back of the bathroom door."

You shoot bolt upright in disbelief.

Changbin simply grins. "Happy birthday, jagiya."

a/n: awwww

[aventoru]

my only one

character(s) : gojo satoru

warning(s) : hurt/comfort(?)

a/n : it's choppy and not the best but i said what i wanted to say. also only by lee hi inspired this. also i miss gojo:(

“satoru, you’re so pretty,” you look down at the jujutsu sorcerer lying on your lap. he glances up at you, a cute boyish grin adorning his face. “you really think so?” he smiles even more sheepishly now. “hmm of course,” you tap his nose affectionately. “well i think you’re prettier,” he reaches up and gently caresses you cheek.

despite the sweet compliment, you digress.

satoru is pretty when he cooks breakfast for you in the mornings. you can’t help but flush when he places the dish in front of your, a cute pink apron tied around his waist.

satoru is pretty when he feeds the stray cats in his way home from work. he kneels down and strokes them lovingly, the white cat’s fur matching the hair on his head. he went as far as slotting his glasses on the creature and snapping a pic for you to see. (‘i found my long lost twin!’ he gushes to you over text.)

satoru is pretty when he takes care of his students. you’ve witnessed him encouraging and pushing them to their limits to curate strong allies. but what he really wants is to give them the childhood he never had. and desperately so.

satoru is pretty when he cries. sometimes, when he’s reminded of the best friend he lost, he leans on your shoulder as silent tears cascade down his porcelain face. on days when life gets rough, satoru collapses into your arms and sobs. despite his shoulders shaking violently, he stays quiet. you can only hold him tight and stroke his hair soothingly.

and strangely, during moments like these, you somehow feel reassured. reassured by the fact that even when satoru is put on a pedestal and praised by all, he is no god. and you are the sole witness.

you think satoru is prettiest when he shows you he’s human.

and he’s your only satoru.

[chaoticbardlady99]

She’s My Religion- Part 4: Makes You Believe in Something Above (Astarion x F! Reader)

Synopsis- Shadowheart, Isobel, Halsin, and Dame Aylin work to heal you. No one is certain you’ll willingly come back from the land of the Dead. Astarion begs for you to come back to him and he wants to spend forever with you.

CW: mentions of gore, violent themes, mentions of SA, mentions of attempted SA, mentions of grief

*not my pic* reach out if it is yours so I can give you credit!

This is barely edited- my mental health has been ❤️🙈✨horrific ✨🙈❤️

The last thing you remember was hearing Astarion screaming and crying- it broke your heart to hear his painful transformation.

Giving up has been the easiest feeling in the whole world- you didn’t know if you were dreaming or in the Heavens, but being embraced by your mother and father as you let the warm glow of their love sink into your non-existent bones, you didn’t know if you cared.

Your father was still your father and your mother was your mother again. They were both still madly in love with one another, but they miss you terribly.

You asked if you were temporarily here. Your mother smiled and said, “only for now, my Heart.”

You broke down in front of both of them- told them your fears and how scared you are to return to Astarion. You don’t want to be forced into vampirism and you certainly don’t want to be a consort.

Your parents told you that fate is a fickle thing and it’s better to embrace it than run from it- they won’t allow you to give up.

You were so angry- they let you be. You lit fires in the Heavenly grass and you screamed until you couldn’t scream anymore. Both of your parents held you as you sobbed- telling you that you’ll be okay.

After, you decided you weren’t going to squander your last little bit of freedom and time with your parents for Gods knows how long. You will not continue being angry over something you have no control over. You will figure it out- you will be okay.

You laughed, cried, hugged, and talked together for what was probably seconds in the mortal world, but hours in this beautiful space.

Your soul feels broken and healed all at the same time when your consciousness hits you like a wagon and you are still in the Szarr palace. Except you aren’t lying on the ground anymore (you think); the air smells of Astarion and the aroma is intoxicating. At least he still smells the same, but you thought you would be far more blood thirsty for waking up as a Spawn and that Astarion would be a lot less hysterical.

Your body hurts- being only halfway between death and life is a painful balance. All of your muscles are taught, but also loose and heavy at the same time. Your skin is numb, but also still stings with every single mark Cazador had cut into you.

Astarion is holding you up against him while Shadowheart is working to heal you and Gale finishes reading the Revivify Scroll. Astarion’s silent tears are falling into your hair and trailing down your face.

“Don’t leave me here alone,” he whispers pleadingly for only your ears to hear, “I didn’t do it- I didn’t Ascend. You were right- you were right the whole time. I dislike you for it, but it’s true.”

You hear him take a shaky, choked breath- your body still not quite awake enough to show any sign of real change in your condition.

You are in complete shock. He didn’t Ascend? It is all he had been talking about for the last three weeks! It’s what he had wanted so why didn’t he do it.

“I’m so so sorry, my Love, ” he continues to beg quietly, “I want you to come back. I need you to come back to me. I don’t want to be in this world without you.”

He pauses for a second and gently kisses your cheek- exhaling unevenly.

“And then have you beat the shit out of me when I decide to come join you because ‘that absolutely is not what I wanted you to do!’”

His soft impression of you, the broken laugh, and the words themselves make your heart feel like it’s going to shatter. You are fighting to make your breaths more noticeable or move your arm- something to tell Astarion I’m here! I didn’t leave you! You aren’t connected enough to your body right now to use the tadpole so that’s not even an option.

Your body is still so weak- Shadowheart is struggling to find out which poison it is and then you hear the voice of Isobel and the sound of Karlach’s clunky armor in the air as Isobel begins to talk to Shadowheart and Halsin about what they have done so far- what has worked? What hasn’t? How long have you been down? Do you have a reason to refuse to come back?

Everyone responds with a resounding no, but you hear Astarion interject.

“Yes,” Astarion’s voice cracks, “she does have a reason to refuse to come back.

“She didn’t want me to Ascend,” he says solemnly, “and we fought about it and I told her it was over. I was coming back to talk to her about it- try to make her see the reasons I needed to Ascend. To try to explain to her that I was doing it for her too.

“I never would have thought Cazador would hurt her like this. He was always so protective,” he manages to choke out after a long pause, “she’s lost her whole family and now she thinks her life is at risk because of me and my obsession with power. Why would she want to come back?”

“Fangs…”

“No,” he screams, the sound echoing through your body, “don’t try to tell me how much she loves me, how she wouldn’t just leave me! I broke her heart. Tav’s family is dead, gone, no more. It’s not even guaranteed some of us will still be alive at the end of this thing and if I thought my best bet of being free was dying because I thought my EX-boyfriend became a power hungry Demi-God Vampire Hybrid- I WOULD CHOOSE STAYING DEAD TOO!”

At least he gets it, but it’s not his fault though. You had made a conscious decision and you knew it was likely you wouldn’t come back. You had been so certain that you had done the right thing this time- you let him go to be what he wanted to be and to find a consort that better suited what he wanted out of life. You were going to be Tadpole free and happily reunited with the people you care for.

You are hoping that he doesn’t resent you- what if you forced him to make a decision? Did he go into your mind? Was he aware that you had chosen to give up and Gods you hope that isn’t the reason he chose not to Ascend because you could not live with yourself if your selfish decision made him deny himself what he wants.

As you try to connect to your tadpole again, you hear Isobel ask for your arm and then feel her stab you with a needle before the world goes dark.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Astarion clings to you in your shared bed as you sleep peacefully in his arms. Isobel had told everyone she had figured out it was Topor- how? Astarion had no damn clue, but you began to look better immediately after she gave you the injection and you’ve been sleeping since.

Astarion had been worried about you sleeping for so long- Isobel, Shadowheart, Halsin and Gale had to come together to convince him that you are entirely okay, but your body had just been through significant trauma- emotionally, mentally, and physically.

Dalyria told him that Cazador had attempted to force himself on you, but you fought him so hard and for so long (even going as far as escaping for a brief moment) that Cazador gave up- resigning to waiting until you were a compliant spawn. So he gave you the Topor to kick start your agonizingly slow and painful death. Isobel said you maybe only had about an hour and a half left when she had arrived- praising Karlach for getting to her so quickly.

Astarion had actually hugged the tiefling (and for a very long time too) after Dame Aylin took you away to help Isobel clean up and stitch your deeper wounds before attempting to heal them. Karlach had been thrilled, but she also told Astarion that she is really proud of him for not ascending and for releasing the spawn into the Underdark. Oh and no hard feelings for the outburst.

Actually- that had been everyone’s words to him today. No one wanted him to Ascend and maybe he would have been miffed prior to today, but Astarion has finally discovered what all those writers have been saying- love and companionship are the most powerful forces across the planes. Astarion could never have killed Cazador or saved you if he hadn’t met any of his companions.

Everyone wanted to know what changed and he would just shrug- said it didn’t feel right. The actual reason is far more private.

Astarion didn’t change his mind because you had ultimately given up- he knew Ascending meant he could bring you back as his Spawn. The hungry, lustful power offered by Mephistopheles had been entirely too tempting and he is grateful he had disrespected your mental privacy in that moment.

Astarion has been told by Cazador for two hundred years how genuinely unlikeable and weak he is. The lure of the ritual had tried to push him to show Cazador ‘just how weak he truly is’- it was practically begging him to complete it.

Astarion could not be more grateful that Shadowheart announced your possible impending death. He wouldn’t have taken the time to cross your boundaries and explore your mind- just resorting to turning you into something you didn’t want to be because that bloodthirsty Ascension would allow him to have power and you wouldn’t be able to leave him. You would have been unhappy at first, but he would keep you safe- that had been the Magic’s justification.

The love you feel towards him is even more all consuming than any evil power would ever be. Your thoughts- even in your grief- were full of warmth, love, and happiness for him despite how gut wrenching it was to hear your mental distress at the idea of him Ascending.

Astarion realized that he would not be able to feel that with you again if he ascended. He would never truly know what it feels like to be loved ever again- he’d be too busy wanting more power and possessing your entire being like Cazador had wanted to do.

If Cazador could do this much damage to you- what would he be capable of? Astarion would have you physically, but eventually, you would turn into a ghost of yourself- abused and empty. Just like Sebastian and the other unfortunate individuals who had been unlucky enough to cross his path.

Or you’ll be like him and eventually find a way to kill him so you can be free. Either way he ends up losing you.

Astarion thought that he would feel relief and happiness when he finally killed Cazador, but he actually felt heartbroken when the man dropped to the floor. It pisses him off even now, but Halsin had said something to him afterwards that had somehow been beneficial.

“It’s okay to grieve your chains after you have spent so long learning to love them- to survive them.”

So he sits here and grieves the last shitty 200 years while holding your sleeping form because you make him feel steady and you keep him on the ground. The hint of your perfume and the clean linens is soothing. You are softly snoring and the sound fills his heart with glee.

You are here and you are alive. He doesn’t have to grieve you or himself and that’s all that matters to him at the end of the day.

There is a quiet knock on the door as Isobel, Dame Aylin, and Shadowheart walk in. They tell him they are going to do a group healing prayer over you that should help you feel better and stronger much faster than if they continue to heal you individually.

It was clear it was a ceremony that was “need to know” and Astarion was promptly kicked out of the room. Realistically the whole thing took about 10 minutes, but Astarion felt like he had to wait for hours for them to be done.

When they are finally done- he races back into the room and makes sure not a single hair is out of place. Astarion worries that he’ll be a nervous wreck if you are out of his sight for a while and he hopes you understand.

Astarion tidies up your stuff in the corner of your shared room (the couples were finally told they need to get their own lodgings) when he hears you gasp for air before you frantically look around the room as quickly as your exhausted body can from where you are- your limbs and neck figuratively glued to the bed.

You haven’t seen Astarion just yet, but he wants to assume he might be the one you are looking for and he’s right. Your eyes land on him and your lip is trembling as you look at him- tears drenching your cheeks instantaneously.

Astarion drops your armor, hastily gets into the bed, and holds you while leaving gentle kisses on your hairline. You hold onto him like you are afraid you may never see him again. Your hands are weakly twisted into his shirt and he can just barely hear you begging him not to leave you between heavy sobs.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he whispers, “unfortunately for you- I’m never allowing you to leave my sight again, Darling.”

Your laughter comes out as a painful wheeze and Astarion runs circles into your back as you ride out the pain. You snuggle into Astarion’s chest and a sigh of relief escapes your lips. Astarion thinks you may go back to sleep, but then you tense up ever so slightly and he almost misses what you say to him next.

“You didn’t give up on what you wanted for me- did you?” Your voice is small and troubled, “I don’t want to be the thing that kept you from having what you wanted.”

“Yes and no, but not in a bad way,” Astarion says, not wanting you to worry any longer, “I realized that Ascending meant losing myself and you- even if I did bring you back to life as a Spawn, you would have been miserable and unhappy.

“I also realized that my love for you and your love for me is far more valuable to me than all the power in the world. If he could do all of those horrible things to you- what would I be capable of? It just clicked. I realized to Ascend would be to destroy what we have and I wouldn’t be keeping you or me safe- I’d be keeping us captive by selling my soul to Mephistopheles.”

You are so quiet that Astarion thinks you fell asleep, but then he feels your tears begin to stain the fabric of his sleeve.

“I wa- I-,” you are struggling through your tears, “I was so sure I was losing you forever or I was going to be stuck with him forever. I never thought this would be the end result.”

“I, for one, am much happier with this result.”

“Me too,” you smile brightly at him, your voice sounding less retired and rough.

Astarion just takes in your face looking at him, tracing your features with his hands. You are only in your undergarments and lots of medical wrappings due to the amount wounds Cazador had inflicted upon your body.

They must have just cleaned and changed all the wrappings though because the scars that were more superficial are no longer wrapped- just bright red ish purple scars.

The deeper ones on your sides are the ones that had worried Isobel. She had to heal, stitch, heal, and then stitch again before the wound itself finally stayed close. Halsin had been able to cast something to prevent you from waking up during the process and Shadowheart had poured something into your mouth so you wouldn’t feel the pain.

Dame Aylin had shook her head and looked at him.

“After a century or five, it stops weighing on your soul so much- the torture and the pain,” she slowly looks at you, her eyes sad and empathetic, “but that first time? You will never forget that.”

Astarion is probably the only one who knows your Step-dad is a horrible pig, but Astarion had already taken care of that. He also can’t deny that Cazador’s torture is a thousand times worse than anything Bridil could do.

You begin to trace Astarion’s features with your fingers and it jolts him out of his thoughts. Astarion leans in and begins to kiss your lips slowly- taking his time to breathe you in.

There is a question on Astarion’s tongue, but he isn’t sure if he should ask just yet. He wants you to know that he is asking out of readiness and not from a “I thought I almost lost you forever”. Not that he doesn’t want to- he just wants to make sure it’s perfect and not rushed. Astarion has been thinking about this question for a long while now- you are his partner, his best friend, his family.

Astarion has waited for what feels like a lifetime to find someone like you and he wants to spend a whole eternity more with you. He just hopes you’ll say “I do” because Tav Ancunín has a very lovely ring to it.

[tonydaddingham]

ok it's not actually as epic✨ as i thought it would be but here is my episode-title prediction but it's very rough and in note form and no doubt is all over the place and pls feel free to discuss in the replies and ill amend accordingly,,, PLUS i need to go through it again in more detail cross referencing my sideburn theory bc some things might actually belong in other episodes and yeah im exhausted from the sheer speed at which i pulled this together fucking enJOY

(note: now contains mention of the leak, proceed w caution)

1. THE ARRIVAL

main storyline summary:

OKAY SO LETS START with this article on mr g's blog - scroll to the last two paragraphs - potentially see pre-fall heaven or the immediate moments before/after the fall which when you consider the opening credits begin with crowley climbing out of the pit/aziraphale descending from heaven, AND the BEAUTIFUL (this isn't being discussed enough imo) fall sequence in the hillywood parody, im tentatively suggesting that we might have a cold open of the fall

✨✨MURIEL PERSPECTIVE ON THE FALL?????✨✨

sosososo in the trailer obvs crowley and muriel are jn heaven and muriel says "you're a demon!!! // im going to get into so much trouble!!!" so WHAT IF DURING THE FALL THEY SMUGGLED CROWLEY OUT OF HEAVEN TO AVOID THE CONFLICT???? and crowley took like the back staircase down so he didn't fall so violently and got to keep his wings and *GUNSHOT* ok so im only like maybe 5% certain it's a flashback after ive rewatched that bit of the trailer oooh maybe 26 times but sTILL imaGINE yeah don't think this anymore, send me an ask if you want to know why bc i cba to write a post explaining

and then presumably a segue? into the first few events ive listed in this post about the start of the second coming idk it might actually be a flashback in another episode hmm yeah actually that seems more likely but anyway

then - present day, gabriel arrives on earth, lost memory/human, "something terrible" in the box that he was meant to deliver to aziraphale (?) that going by that second coming (SC) post i think literally contains jesus

ok update after the gumshoe az pics: so if gabriel is connected to the pub, and by the extension the jukebox, it must be the record that arrives in the box with the address attached, and aziraphale starts looking into it from there????? idk see ep 2

crowley gets evicted, then crowley and shax interaction in the park

presumably an introduction to maggie and nina, plus the "naked man friend" clip

discovery of gabriel at the bookshop, and ensuing argument leading to crowley summoning lightning, and the boys going no contact sob

2. THE CLUE

main storyline summary:

*edit because my draft didn't save properly and ive only just noticed - believe that this ep has the job minisode

SO following the newest pic release of crowley and aziraphale and the record, which ive gone off about here, i think that the skip doesn't quite happen yet BUT aziraphale obvs has the record which i think god has sent him as a clue and then goes to find crowley to talk about it ✨A cLuE✨ but crowley tells him to fuck off

also crowley is a bartender

THEN we have a present-day time skip, gabriel being a very good assistant in the shop

again after the SC theory i think that gabriel lost the box and instead god somehow sends aziraphale the record and address as a clue

aziraphale (unsure of the genesis here) starts researching the jukebox and the everyday song, presumably buys the record from maggie

aziraphale in the bookshop, looking at the jukebox articles, crowley storms in, "im back" see below!!!

THEN second time aziraphale approaches crowley, pub drink ft crowley in jeans and a nice top™ which i think is actually his work top™, then the clip ✨a cLuE✨

crowley and shax in the bentley having a heart to heart, and i worry that she essentially tempts him into luring goob out of the shop so hell can get to him and crowley can get back his precious 😭 peaceful 😭 existence with aziraphale EDIT FOLLOWING THIS!!! I think she definitely tells him to get chummy with aziraphale again

AND NOW we have the "im back" scene

possibly the beelzebub clip from them in hell? possibly an interaction between them and shax? beelzebub manifests as a fly and plays a game of tag in the bookshop with goob, trying to make up for their failure in losing track of jesus

at some point the other angels come to the bookshop to interrogate aziraphale for if he has seen gabriel, believes he's lying, and resolve to send in their ✨top agent✨

3. I KNOW WHERE I’M GOING

main storyline summary:

✨MURIEL MY BELOVED✨

whole "cup of tea" scene, plus crowley removing plants from the bentley "why don't you go by train? you love trains"

possibly muriel feeding back to heaven with her report about aziraphale, his grumpy friend, and his assistant 💓

aziraphale off up to edinburgh in the bentley, possibly crowley has stayed behind to babysit gabriel? (i feel like the 'are you a bookseller too? / not even at gunpoint' interaction was a bit foreshadow-y)

UPDATE: WHY IS GABRIEL CONNECTED TO THE JUKEBOX MYSTERY?? WAS THE RECORD IN FACT IN THE BOX??? AND ITS SOMEHOW LINKED TO HOW GABRIEL LOST HIS MEMORY??? IM SO CONFUSED

still confused but see above SC theory

was the resurrectionist address already taped to the record when it arrived in the box? NOBODY KNOWSSS

UPDATE 2 re: the meme template prime just gave us: so what IF AZIRAPHALE goes to the pub, asks if theyve seen goob, the pub owner (who is in the meme) says "shhhhh I have some intel meet me at the graveyard at 6", aziraphale goes and they show him a pic of gabriel in the pub like removing the everyday record from the jukebox? bc gabriel removed it and that's why the jukebox is now stuck on that song??? AGHHH now I'm wondering if the pub people got a video of the graveyard fight or a pic of the box or something and that gives aziraphale the indication that the whole thing is centred around the second coming

shax possibly knows that crowley is there, and calls the bookshop? or crowley calls heaven to narc on gabriel? OR aziraphale calls him from the phone crowley possibly lent him and idk but a conversation along the lines "hey crowley so i think a fight with demons caused goob to lose his memory and lmao but i think he also lost jesus!!!

either way crowley uses aziraphale's phone specifically and is obviously looking intently at something

and lastly again i think this has the resurrectionist minisode - fitting given that they decked out a pub in edinburgh with resurrectionist signs etc so that probably triggers a flashback for az when he goes there for the jukebox mystery

4. THE HITCHHIKER

no official press photos for this one as far as i know , but possibly????

main storyline summary:

first, *SLAMS HAND ON TABLE* 🚨40s MINISODE🚨

i think however that this is where muriel is back on earth, potentially rooting around greek street trying to be as nosy as possible

and crowley now loaded in with info hot off the press (lmao aziraphale) knows that the second coming is involved and realises he needs to get into heaven to find out more info which is so james bond of him what a legend

and then WELL WHADDAYA KNOW muriel turns up and therefore im wondering if the above is from crowley's pov - muriel spots him in the shop and gets a tad excited

then - bless their soul - muriel gets coerced into helping crowley infiltrate heaven, or he follows them back to the heaven entrance they're using, and jumps in the lift with them last minute (ie the hitchhiker)

god knows why he's going to heaven in disguise but he's living his best life bless*

ALTERNATIVELY see ep1 about the muriel/crowley scene

5. THE BALL

okay i admittedly have no idea on this wtf happens in this one

do they DANCE

is aziraphale checking off a GUESTLIST for their disco ball?????? WHAT IF ITS MAGGIES BIRTHDAY OR A FUNDRAISER AND THATS WHY THERES RECORD GARLANDS ON THE SHOP IN THE OPENING SEQUENCE????

rap battle

a lil SMOOCHY SMOOCH??? (NOT the leak one, a different one)

6. EVERY DAY

✨everything goes to shit lmao✨

i can't even be bothered write out everything that happens in this episode because i think we can guess the bare essentials - crowley is on the throne in hell, demons attack the bookshop, metatron appears and declares war, aziraphale sharts himself, DEMONS destroy said bookshop and aziraphale's FUCKING HOME

i do feel like EVERY is in here because i reckon aziraphale finds out crowley was betraying him to hell, even if for a good reason, and crowley desperately tries to make aziraphale see that it was "for us, for you aziraphale!!!!", SNOG, and aziraphale tells him to get fucked bc now he can never trust him, crowley said hed never lie to him "obviously, you're a demon" from s1, and the cliffhanger is them being on their OWN own sides @azirafuck back me up here

Update 19/07: and what if aziraphale can't forgive crowley and literally tells him he can't forgive him... and fallssssss?

like I'm SORRY but i need heartbreak like THIS

IF AZIRAPHALE FALLS THO IM GOING TO KILL EVERYONE ON EARTH AND THEN MYSELF💓✨

ACTUALLY MAYBE THIS???? IM GOING INSANE NOW

[toms-cherry-trees]

Withered || Arthur Shelby x Reader

Summary: You have given all the love you have, but love needs to be cared for to bloom

Word Count: 3390

Warnings: Angst, mentions of murder, blood, drug usage and alcoholism

Author’s note: My submission for K’s lovely celebration “Tales From The Flower Garden” with the prompt “You thought I was a savable man” Again CONGRATULATIONS MY SWEET MUNCHKIN K FOR YOUR MILESTONE YOU DESERVE THEM ALL and I put up so much of me for this to makeup for my failure for your last celebration that I even put together some pics to make it more in theme. Love ya lots darling!

The loose petals heaped around your feet upon the wooden floors. Pink, peach, pure white and cream. You had been toiling over that floral arrangement for hours, but your tenseness and your wandering thoughts had robbed you of your concentration, jittering hands having reduced the soft buds to denuded and wilted stems. Behind you, the antique grandfather clock’s bells chimed, taunting you with the unforgiving pass of time, which seemed to move twice as fast that night. The black carved hands marked midnight on the golden clock face. Arthur had promised to be home in time for dinner.

The table remained set in the dining room, the fine silverware and dishware all laid out, perfectly polished, awaiting for those who would not sit at the table that night. The candles had melted halfway through before you had the heart to blow them out. A crystal vase held a marvellous bouquet of your best roses, red and white in full bloom. A red petal had come loose and laid over the white tablecloth like a blotch of spilled blood. 

The housekeeper came to you at least five times, inquiring how much longer the cook should wait to warm up the plates and prepare the rest of the dishes. You kept dragging on what you already knew until a quarter past ten, when you instructed her to bring you a cup of tea and some biscuits only, and to have the staff dine on everything that had been prepared already. At least the food would not go to waste.

You continued to fiddle unceasingly with the weakened stems, hoping that arranging them in a certain way would hide the ruin of the flowers, perfection on the outside to hide the ruin behind. But it was a hopeless cause, and no amount of skill or attention could undo the disaster. 

In a rapture of frustration you smacked the vase violently, as if that piece of green tinted porcelain had become the source of all your discontent. The ornament crashed down obstreperously, sending sharp shards and greenery in every direction of your sitting room. The fury morphed into panic, and you quickly swept the evidence of your riotous act behind the drapes; much like you swept your woes under the carpet to be hidden until you forcibly stumbled upon them again, having blissfully forgotten their existence when not faced with them. 

That fleeting but fierce outburst helped decompress your anger like steam escaping from a teapot, leaving you empty and strangely deflated. All energies left you abruptly, and your legs threatened to buckle under the weight of your body and your worries. You slumped backwards, half sitting, half crashing into a nearby armchair. Your tired eyes went over the spilled water staining the floorboards white, the astray pieces of vase and leaves you had not picked up, and the dent left in the wood by the crashing porcelain. Slowly, gradually like a withering carnation, your body began to slouch, until your elbows rested on your knees and your chin buried in your chest, face hidden in your trembling hands, muffling a saddening mixture of sobs and heavy sighs. 

The clock in the corner chimed again. 

You did not move until a familiar sound snapped you out of your trance. Wheels on the gravel of the driveway, and the steady rumbling of a car engine. The mess of your hair, the wrinkles in your dress, your sweaty neck and the painful stiffness of your joints were compelling proof that you had fallen asleep in the chair. The sky outside had faded from a pitch black to a dark and stormy grey, uncommon but not impossible in those early days of spring. Birds chirped outside, the chickens and roosters cackled in their pens behind the house, and the dogs howled and jumped about to welcome your husband home. A house full of life, while you felt just like a hollow carcass. 

The front door creaked open. Normally you would be quick on your feet to greet Arthur home with a kiss on the cheek, while he would circle your waist with his slender arm and pepper your face with kisses, tickling you with his brush moustache and making you giggle like a schoolgirl in love for the first time. You’d take his coat and cap while he asked about your day, and you would fill him in with small talk about the farm, your painting and drawing and the latest tales from your two young children, William and Helene, with a third one due to join the family in the summer. Arthur would compliment the beauty and the aroma of the new floral arrangements you had crafted to decorate the various rooms of your home, even though he did not understand one bit what he talked about, but he knew how much the simple praises filled your heart. And all would be well.

But things had changed and so had you.

Arthur tried to enter the house silently, as if by making no noise he would just easily slip by and you would miraculously forget yet another broken promise. You peered around the corner in time to see him tiptoeing around the creaking boards, shoes in hand and drenched in what you presumed to be blood from head to toe. Perhaps you should have been worried, and in another time you would have been anyway, but you knew better; that blood belonged to others. Others he had slain with his own hand in the night he promised to be home early for dinner. 

Soon his eyes found you, standing in the foyer all dishevelled, eyes dulled by exhaustion and the corners of your lips downturned by disappointment. Your silent presence surprised him enough for him to drop his shoes, back straightening tight like a low rank soldier facing his war general. He wrung his cap in his hands nervously, his moustache quivering with the anxious flitter of his lips as he mumbled a hundred different apologies so fast and so quietly that it sounded like a low humming, words tumbling over each other as he tried to find the right thing to say to excuse the inexcusable. At last he fell silent, head dropped low, ears braced and heart clenched in anticipation of the impending arrival of your wrath upon him, raining like hellfire, a penance he knew he deserved for his transgression.

But the words never came.

The seconds passed and silence reigned the scene, broken only by the ticking of the clock and the whistle of the breeze entering through the ajar door. After an unbearable pause, Arthur looked up just enough to examine your expression, almost expecting you to be branding a fire poker, arm raised to strike. But the scene before him turned out to be much worse, and he wished he had not looked.

You looked so broken. So defeated. Your shoulders slumped, eyes reddened, aged decades in hours by worry and anger and sadness. Arthur hated your unhappiness more than anything in this world, yet he continues to be the source of all your grievances, then become racked by guilt, apologise and make half hearted promises of improvement that inevitably end broken, only to repeat the cycle over and over again.

Your husband stepped tentatively, forward, a hand raised as if to touch you, but halfway deciding not to push his luck and letting it fall to his side “Poppy” He murmurs, using his favourite pet name for you in honour of your favourite flower. You can hear the edge of regret in his voice, matched by the sorrowful expression upon his face. But you cannot swallow your rightful feelings to coddle his own.

“Save it” You waved your hand in exasperation, moving past him and out the door, not allowing him a chance to stop you.

Your wandering steps took you to your flower garden. In the first months of your marriage, when the future looked rose tinted and joyful and every day felt like a new honeymoon, Arthur had the best gardeners and flower experts come to your newly purchased estate to plant it for you and teach you how to care best for each individual breed, all of that just to celebrate your first month of union. Roses, poppies, carnations, lilies of the valley and forget-me-nots composed the rows of fragrant flower beds, their perfume mixing in the air with the scent of damp earth and grass. 

In the warmer months the garden filled with life, bees and butterflies fluttering about the vibrant buds, drinking the sweet nectar while your children admired them with wide eyed wonder. You loved to have picnics there, all the family lounging in an old blanket with a basket prepared by your loving hands with everyone’s favourite snacks. Arthur loved to lay his head in your lap during your pregnancies, his cheek pressed against the rounded bump and whispering hushed promises to the baby against your skin, never letting you in on the details of those secret conversations. The world looked so vibrant and lively, all filled with brightness and hopefulness and happiness; sheer, untrammelled happiness. 

But now grey skies hovered above you, the insects had hidden and the joy had passed. The world felt veiled in grey, dull and lifeless; even your cherished flowers having lost their shine. You walked through the rows of greenery, pulling your cardigan closer to your frame. A gelid drizzle began to fall, but you felt such cold from within that the droplets on your skin went unnoticed. The breeze grew stronger, loosened flower petals drifting across the ground and being swept away, some weakened flower stems snapping and falling at your feet. If left to the elements and not nurtured properly, the flowers withered and died. 

Just like love.

On one of the bushes, a flower stood out to you. A perfect pearly white rose in full bloom, rows upon rows of soft petals spread open and exuding a sweet aroma. The beads of water gathering on the folds gave it a special shimmer, as if dotted by little crystals. You reached to pluck it, but a thorn dug into your thumb, drawing a gasp from your lips. When you raised your hand to inspect the damage, a blood drop fell on the flower, the pureness of the white ruined by the crimson liquid. The contrast between your blood and the flower gave you a strange feeling, like an unexplainable tightening in your heart.

A pair of slender hands brushed down your shoulders, sliding over them a thick coat and pulling it close to your frame. It smelled of Arthur’s cologne, and you instinctively snuggled on it, feeling the softness of the fabric against your cheek.

“I hope this is not the blood soaked one you came home in” Your murmured, not turning to face him, instead focused on the bloodied rose.

“No…I grabbed one from the closet in the entrance” You heard the hesitance in his voice “You should go back inside… it’s getting cold and the baby…maybe get to bed with some tea and…” Even without seeing, you knew he was rubbing the back of his head, his face tense in concentration as he tried to read your temper and avoid screwing it up further. But things had already hit rock bottom on your side, so he could only go lower by bringing a shovel.

“I’m fine here” You snapped, arms crossed over your chest, your hands tucked under your armpits to warm your stiffened fingers “I need to be alone”

“Love, think of the baby” Arthur tried to gently guide you away from the flowers, but that gentle and caring touch of his riled you up like a bull before the red cloth. You turned around with such violence he stumbled backwards, appalled by the outburst of his usually sweet and amenable wife.

“I said I want to be alone. I need to be alone to think. Think of why I keep giving you second chances, over and over and over again, when I know you will stomp on them!” Your voice rose several octaves, your outraged words booming throughout the gardens and above the rustle of the wind “One night. Just one night I needed you to stay true to your word. But of course I am met with only disappointment. I always come in second place. We are always an afterthought”

His eyebrows knitted together in a furrow as he stepped forward, his gloved hands cupping your cheeks. You didn’t push away, but your eyes never met his “That is not true. It is not. You are my life, the kids and you are all I have, but Tommy…”

Tommy. Of course. What else could be the reason? Tommy never liked you much, thinking you did nothing more than lead Arthur astray from the family, keeping him tamed and calm when he needed him volatile and angry. But again, Tommy rarely liked anyone other than himself, so you never took the aversion to heart.

“You placed your brother on a pedestal so high that he stands even above the stars, and in your adoration for him you have become blind to the world around you. You would dig out the very Earth and catch rain with your hands for him, but would you do the same for me? Would you break a promise to Tommy to honour one made to me?” You did not need a reply, but you needed your husband to question himself on that. And the silence that followed gave you the answer you needed. 

“Do you know what day it was yesterday?” The tone in your voice had changed. The words held not only anger, but hurt. The bitter kind of hurt of a person with no tears left to cry, but with their heart still tightened in a painful coil. A tired pain which has been drawn out too long, which no longer burns but a sting remains everlasting, always nagging in the back and unable to be soothed.

“Friday?” He asked sheepishly

“It was our fifth wedding anniversary. Five years in which you’ve carried that golden band on your finger. In which I’ve given you my heart, my body, all have and I am. I have given you two children and another on the way. And you couldn’t give me one day of your life to celebrate with me”

A gelid silence lingered between you two. You saw the gears slowly turning in Arthur’s brain, his face drooping and eyes widening as the realisation slowly began to sink in. You noticed him silently counting with his fingers, going back and forth on months and days; but truth be told, you doubted he could even recall the year of the wedding had you not reminded him of the pass of time.

“Poppy” He attempted again, hands in your elbows to pull you close to him “I am so sorry, my love. I thought it was today and-”

“Oh please Arthur! After five years you should know me better than to think I would swallow such a lie” An humourless laugh escaped your lips “But again, what more can I expect from you?”

You saw how your jabs hurt him, and deep down you wanted him to be hurt. You wanted him to feel even a fraction of the grief you carried perpetually upon your soul. To understand what it felt when the person who held your heart dropped it and stomped on it with their heel until only dust remained.

You turned away from him, noticing how the breeze had become howling wind, and the gentle drizzle had thickened into a spring rain, the water droplets slipping past the wide collar of the coat and running down the curve of your spine. You crossed your arms over your chest, hands resting upon your shoulders. One might think it a simple gesture to keep yourself warm, but you actually just tried to keep yourself whole.

“You used to buy me flowers” Your eyes closed, evocating in your mind sweet memories of better times to help you steady your heart “You would come home with these massive bouquets and I could barely see your face behind it. They were so colourful and vibrant, and I would take so much care in arranging them in that Japanese vase we got for our wedding. And every time a petal fell off I would press it to dry and then store it. I have the first roses you gave me in a crystal pyx in my vanity. I had the flowers from my bridal bouquet dry pressed and framed. All little mementos of the happiest days of my life” The longing was palpable in your voice, your head tilted to lay on your shoulder as you saw those memories playing behind your eyelids like a movie

But soon those flashbacks faded, and the sweetness turned to bitter bile in your throat “I thought things would be alright. I thought that together, things would improve. You always said you wanted to be a better man, and I hoped I could turn you into one. For some months I thought I did” Your throat tightened and you swallowed the lump down to continue “But every time things seemed better, they ended worse than before. It is always one step forward and three back with you” You dabbed at your hot tears furiously, but they kept mixing on your skin with the freezing rain.

“When I married you, I never thought I would find myself dragging you to the bathtub to wash you clean of your own vomit and spilled gin. That I would have to learn every trick in the book to get blood off your shirts so the maids wouldn’t see them. That I could not let my own children run free around their home until I have made sure you didn’t left your guns or your fucking cocaine laying around”

You heard a thud behind you. Arthur had dropped to his knees, clinging to your skirts like a repentant sinner faced with the Doomsday.

“I can change. I will. This is the last time I fail you” Long fingers tugged on your clothes, like a scared child seeking comfort in his mother. Every fibre of your being urged you to pull him to his feet and embrace him, cradle him into you and promise him that everything would be well in the end. But you couldn’t, because not even you knew if things would ever be well again. Or if you wanted them to.

He noticed the little effect his words had on you, and redoubled his efforts “I-I…I will throw away the whiskey, and the snow and the opium and everything. I will never kill again, never carry a gun with me” His grip on you tightened, arms around your hips with his forehead pressed to your lower back. You felt his sobs against your body, the way he snuggled into you for warmth. In another time, the action would have moved you. But your heart had frozen, immune to hollow words and feeble promises.

“No, Arthur” The impassiveness of your tone caught him off guard, his grip faltering on you “I have given you all I had. I have bled myself dry to keep you afloat. But I can’t anymore. I cannot go on like this for the rest of my days” Your eyes fluttered open, teardrops beading in your lashes like crystals. “I used to think you could be saved”

“You thought I was a savable man” He fell back on the ground, his hold loosening until his arms fell limp at his sides. Your body felt cold without his touch, but even colder with it.

“Yes” You breathed out quietly

“But you don’t think I am no more”

Your eyes fixed again on the bloodied rose. The crimson had dried on the petal, leaving a stain that the pouring failed to wash off. The weight of the water forced the petals down, until they began to split and reveal the very centre of the flower, leaving it exposed to the elements. Some petals drifted in the wind, one by one, disappearing into the storm, until only the red one remained. But that one, too, eventually fell off at your feet, and then the rose was no more.

“No”

[magicalink]

❥Perfect Party

(Wanton pic of Huffman by @ kayysushi just for you to see how ripped he is in this au)

Taglist: Tysm to all who showed support for this series and sorry for the wait! @linn-a-a @butteerflyy

If I forgot you or wanna be tagged let me know!

Kunikuzushi had to endure another dreadful day of school.

At first he was content, tormenting students all over the corridors, abusing his position as the hallway monitor as usual. Asserting dominance, just like it always had been.

But then again, his happiness was ruined upon seeing you in his territory. There you were, the fly in his soup, wrecking his mental peace just by existing.

Just by invading his pond, by strolling with your girlfriends along the corridor. Seeing you revolted his stomach. Your disgusting aura of beauty and purity had to be illegal.

You were all so pretty, so shiny, so fucking perfect.

He watched you carefully from afar.

You were walking in between Barbara and Keqing, who were in the same class as you. He hated you blind.

Out of the three of you, Keching had the best grades. Barbara was by far the most popular, but at the same time the most uptight. But you. You were certainly the most beautiful.

At least, to him. And that made him even angrier. That despite how much of a nuisance you were in his life, he just couldn't get his eyes off of the hem of your short skirt.

It was simply unfair. The way you got everything in life. The grades, the popularity, the beauty. The approval of his mother. Unacceptable.

So he couldn't be happier when he heard the bell ring and you were late, still hanging around the corridor, chattering nervously.

An evil smile crept to his lips.

Finally! This was the golden day! He would be able to report the holy trinity of the school!

He enjoyed every second of seeing you nervously hurrying along the corridor to arrive to class, hoping to get rid of him.

But he was faster.

"What do we got here, huh?" He spat with a wide grin "Such good students, arriving late to class?" He said, pulling out his papers and pen, ready to file a report.

"Nooo!" Barbara cried, joining his hands in a plea.

Keqing huffed in annoyance upon seeing him.

"Oh, come on, Kunikuzushi, it's just two minutes, you could let it slide!" She tried to negotiate.

His smile got even wider and happier, his eyes shining evily like a madman while he wrote your report.

"Oh my, I wasn't expecting such negligence from such a proper person!" He laughed, savouring his own venom on his lips.

"Come on, Y/N, tell him something!" Keqin whispered, discretly jogging you with her elbow.

"Hum??" You mumbled, suddenly snapping out of your thoughts. You were too busy thinking about your recent romance and tonight's party, the topic you were discussing before he had caught you.

Upon raising your gaze, you found Kunikuzushi's, and the only thing you could say was...

"Hi"

He smiled in delight, thinking that for once in his life he was intimidating you. But the truth was that you were too worried about what could happen that night at the party with Huffman -your recent crush and possible future boyfriend-to pay attention to him.

Keqing sighed as a sign of surrender and she picked the report sheet from your step-brother's hand, with the most dignity she could. Then she gently tapped Barbara's shoulder to try and soothe her sobs, leading her in the direction of your classroom.

"You should be ashamed of yourself..." Keqing whispered between gritted teeth.

She realized you were still daydreaming so she pulled your arm to drag you with her. But she made your phone slip from your hand, falling to the floor.

Before any of you could react, Kunikuzushi picked it up and read the content of your screen.

"Sooo," he chirped maliciously "A party tonight? That's why our dear star students are running late? My, my, how shameful!" He laughed, pointing at the message with the invitation.

"You should mind your own business!" Keqin exclaimed, almost spitting fire at him while violently tearing your phone away from his hand.

"Damn, touch a nerve, did I?" He smirked, covering his poisonous mouth with one perfectly white hand.

"You shouldn't take what isn't yours." she frowned.

"It's ok, Keqing," you said, calming the waters just like always, gently grabbing your phone from her hand. Fortunately the screen was intact! "He just picked it up. Let's get going or we are going to arrive even later." you added, pushing both her and Barbara towards the classroom.

"Thanks Kuni," you said absent-mindedly "See you tonight"

Before he could scold you for calling him that annoying pet name, Keqing interrupted:

"Come on, Y/N, like anyone would have invited him...!"

Well that really angered him, so before he could explode you hurried them down the corridor.

"Bye!" You exclaimed apologetically, fleeing the crime scene dragging your friends with you.

You left a furious Kunikuzushi behind, frozen in place in the middle of the corridor. Damn, he wanted to scream and curse so badly! At Keqing for feeling so superior, and even louder at you for pretending not to be. For pretending to be ignorant and innocent, just like always!

You fooled everyone. Your friends, the whole school, even his mother.

But not him.

He was convinced that you were just as hideous as him. But that he was smarter.

Now he really was pissed. It was time for him to finally put his brain to use and decide on a plan to finally ruin you. To get you out of the game forever.

So the rest of the day he was so busy thinking on what the hell to do to you, that he didn't even bother to hear the whispers about where the party was going to be held.

He didn't want to go anyway. Not without a crystal clear idea of what to do.

When the final bell rang he hurriedly fled out of the classroom, alleviating his classmates who were already tired of his aura, which today was darker than usual.

When he left the school campus, he saw you walking out with your friends. Keqing stabbed him with her eyes upon seeing him, calling your attention.

You raised your hand to wave at him, but he ignored you and stormed away, crossing the street without even looking. Fortunately for him but unfortunately for the whole school and his mother, no cars ran over him and he continued his way back home, stomping furiously.

That annoyed him even more. How many times did he have to tell you off to stop you from asking to walk home with him? As if he was going to let that happen! By insisting, he was sure you were trying to make fun of him. You were walking on thin hecking ice already, was nothing ever too much for you?!

The truth was that you just wanted to say goodbye. But it didn't matter. He always lived like he was the victim of a greek tragedy. And just like one, he dramatically left the stage.

• ────── ✾ ────── •

When he got home he went straight to his bedroom and didn't even bother to say hi –or to check if there was someone in the kitchen or the second floor to say hi to. And there he stayed all afternoon.

You came home a bit late, because you went shopping with your friends, with the party in mind.

When you arrived, you went straight to the kitchen, where Ei was drinking tea while your mother Yae was making dinner.

"Hello! I'm back!" You said, leaving your coat gleefully by the door. You only carried your school bag and a single shopping bag with the dress you had bought for tonight.

"Good evening, Y/N," Ei greeted you with a little and modest smile, while sipping her tea.

"I'm making your favorite!" Yae exclaimed.

"Oh, you shouldn't have bothered, I was going to cook, I'm sorry I'm late" you said, a bit upset you didn't make it in time.

"Oh, don't worry" Yae answered, patting your back "You told me you were going with your friends today, so I was prepared. Besides, you've cooked dinner most nights this week, it was my turn already."

"Thank you," you smiled "I'll go take a shower while you finish cooking. I'm going with the girls to a party tonight..."

"I remember," your mother said "How are you getting there?" She asked.

"Oh, don't worry," you replied from the corridor after picking some clothes to take them to the bathroom "Barbara's dad is taking us and Keqing's mom is picking us up this time "

"Ok, I won't get worried then." she smiled while stirring the cooking pot.

You were simply the perfect family, and love and peace reigned upon your home.

Except for the little gremlin that inhabited the room at the back…

"Tell Kunikuzushi to at least come and set the table." Ei said rather bitterly, placing her cup of tea on the table with a dry sound.

"Ok!"

You went to place a knock on his door, the last one at the back of the corridor.

"Kunii~" you chirped, making him grit his teeth out of sheer annoyance "Ei wants you to set the table!"

"Don't call me that!" He shouted, harshly opening the door in front of your face "And dress properly!" He added upon seeing you had your shirt undone, his face even redder now because of the embarrassment.

"I-Im sorry…" you stammered, but he closed the door shut again "But don't forget to do it…" you insisted, and then you walked to the bathroom.

When you looked at your reflection in the mirror you realized your cheeks were slightly blushed. You huffed and bit the inside of your cheek while opening the hot water to set the shower.

Damn Kunikuzushi, always mad at you for no reason. Nothing you did was ever good for him!

You were just trying to act more like you were a real family, walking around the house in pajamas, casual clothes, etc. But he was always against the idea of collaborating in the family you were trying to make. And he made sure to remind you in every way. Especially by reminding you he would never see you like a sister...

A tickling feeling awakened inside of you, warming your body, but you repressed it, ashamed of it. Becoming aware that he saw you like any girl walking half-dressed around the house made you feel madly embarrassed. You had to open the tap of the cold water to extinguish it.

You covered your mouth with your hand.

Damn Kuni! Always doing his best to make everything awkward! He made you look like a pervert! Like you were trying to turn him on or something!

He was so mean, so unconsiderate! He was a really handsome guy, and you had done a great sacrifice by forcing yourself to look at him as a brother and not a man for the sake of this family project! He was ruining all your efforts!!

You breathed deeply and soaked under the cold water to get calm and kill down those indecent feelings. To try and forget what you just had thought, to not feel guilty about the dirty thoughts you had.

"I'm just desperately horny…" You told yourself. It was Huffman's fault. He had been doing his best to make you thirsty for him these past months.

The truth is that you felt really lonely and were desperate for physical affection.

You had only had one boyfriend. He was called Guy, and you went together to the school you attended before moving in with Kuni and Ei. You had a really good realtionship, but your complicated family lives prevented you from being together.

Tunner, Guy's father, was pretty old and had a delicate health, so he was so busy taking care of him and trying to cope with school that he didn't have time for you. You were also busy, because ever since your own father's death you were taking care of your sad mother, trying to make her happy, to help her with the family Shrine, and to have top grades.

You simply had no time for one another and shortly before you knew that you were moving houses and going to another school you both decided the best was to break up.

It was a peaceful break up. You stayed friends. You really cared about each other, and each other's families. But it had been a long time since the last time you texted each other…

Kunikuzushi was a really handsome guy. He inherited his mother's beauty. You were dazzled by him the first time you met him, shortly after your mother told you about her relationship with Ei and introduced her to you.

But he was forbidden territory. Your mom was deeply in love with Ei. It was the first time you saw her happy after your father's death. He was going to become your step-brother.

So, for the sake of your mom's happy marriage, you accepted it inmediately.

Plus, when you entered Kunikuzushi's school you learned the shocking truth about him: he was a total prick to the other students! In addition to this, there were plenty of fish in the sea...

You made lots of friends and shortly after you met Huffman.

He was handsome. Not as handsome as Kuni but still good looking. And, totally oposite to him, he treated people nicely and thus he was very popular at school.

There was spark between you. He flirted with you a lot and your friends approved him as a possible boyfriend. Even the uptight Barbara accepted him!

One day he kissed you in the parking lot and two weeks later you ended up having sex in his room when his parents were out. Needless to say, you didn't tell this to Barbara! Keqing was the only one who knew, and you agreed to keep it a secret from her bc...sex before marriage?? You weren't even his girlfriend! She could have a heart attack if she knew!

Well you didn't think marriage was necessary for having sex but you certainly wanted Huffman to ask you to be his girlfriend. You liked him and you wanted to know that you were important to him.

But ever since you hooked up, the relationship didn't advance any further.

He was distanced, but never fully away. He just kept flirting with you, making you desire him. You never got the chance to be alone together again.

So this night was the night.

You were going to see him at the party, and if he didn't have the courage to take the next step you were going to do it!

You were gonna kiss him! And you were gonna ask him out!

You smiled to yourself while rinsing your hair and all the sinful thoughts about Kuni out of your head, you wanted to make sure it looked perfect. You had your outfit planned weeks ago. You had everything planned. You had to look stunning and it had to be the perfect party.

So you encouraged yourself mentally while drying yourself with the towel, carefully getting dressed. You had to look confident. Huffman wasn't gonna escape from you this time!

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Author note: I swear the spice is coming up next chap I just had to set the scenery. Also next chap is almost complete so it won't be that long, the problem will come with the chapters following that one 😅

[mryellooo]

I just completed my own legacy challenge after over a year and 3 months and while violently sobbing because I loved this family so much I took this pic of all my heirs together

[2tiredgal]

Looking for someone 18+ to play any Papyrus or Sans! Most AUs welcome!

Warning! Roleplay will contain PTSD (from resets and abuse from his younger brother), Abuse (mentioned/ in past). If this still interests you message me on discord at 2tiredgal

Playing as FellSwap Pap who finds out he's pregnant. The most timid, anxiety ridden Pap I know of. This is due to his awful monster of a younger brother and his deadly universe. I'm looking for any versions of Sans or Papyrus. I will not take his own brother. I welcome any of our skelebois! I will be calling FS!Pap Hickory so if you play another Papyrus we won't get confused. Also, like I said before Hickory has been through some shit so his reaction all of this isn't going to be at all great. Another warning Hickory has a LOT of scars (aka cracks on him). Many scattered about all over his bones. The main two that are the most noticeable are the on on his skull (going above his left eyesocket down to his teeth which made him loose one of his fangs) and the one going across his entire ribcage (from his top left to his bottom right).

Reference Pics;

-------

Having kids was never something Hickory had ever thought he would do. Raising his brother had been enough for him, but also his universe was very unsafe for any child or infant. It was violent, aggressive, and everyone was always at each other’s throats. It wasn’t a great place to be which is why he never allowed his boyfriend to step foot outside of his house when the other came to visit. He was too frightened of some monster attacking them and they either ended up injured o-or worse!

They had been together for three years now going on this year. Everything was going very well until Hickory found out he was pregnant. It hadn’t been planned and of course! He was completely and absolutely petrified of how his boyfriend would react when he finds out! Would they leave him? Would they call him awful names? He didn’t know and he really didn’t want to find out! This is why he did what he did. He ran off from his house and his universe to hide from his boyfriend and his brother. God, he didn't want to his brother to ever find out about this! His reaction would be the worst! He didn’t know what to do okay?! This was something he had never planned on having happen to him in his life! Hickory just needed to get somewhere safe and calm to think!

Where he had gone was a place called Outertale. It had the most beautiful sky.. Going there usually helped him calm down so it was the best place to go when he entered into such a bad state of mind. It had been a couple of hours before the other had found him. He hadn’t moved from the spot he had sat in. His knees were tucked against his chest while his arms were wrapped around his legs. A soft, shaky sobs could be heard coming from him.

[witchofthesouls]

So how would a risk-carriage looks like?

Anonymous asked: Could you do a split twins carriage?

(And because I saw a super hot pic of Soundwave, here's a continuation of TFP!Soundwave with a carrying Con!SO. No valveplug here, though. Just some sad times and near death. No ones dies here.)

The dull ache in your chassis has been persistent for the past two weeks. The only relief was Soundwave fragging you into non-activity. Knock Out had said the sparklet is separating and getting ready to drop to your chamber. The datapad stated that separation causes minimal pain.

Keyword: minimal.

You’re not in “minimal” pain. It slaggen hurts.

Enough to drop you to your hands and knees or try to. The wrench and your only source of light disappear below as you’re stuck inside a narrow space between walls, only held up by specialized magnets that don't need constant input. Otherwise, you would have skidded down as well. 

You clutch your chassis with a sob. The phantom servo drips inside your frame and grips throbbing spark begins to squeeze-

Your vision pixelates from the burning agony, steam fills the space as your internal temperature suddenly skyrockets and there’s no cool air to vent, the SOS flares repeatedly on the public comm lines. Your breaking HUD is flooded by a rush of others trying to pinpoint your location, and multiple voices overlap on your comms as you struggle to remain conscious in the dark.

You shake violently, plating clattering on the walls, and as dust falls, it’s the entire space that’s shuddering. Somewhere above, a hidden shaft opens and light spills into the darkness.

The last thing you remember is the feeling of servos hauling you out by the collar.

__________

It's the beeping that wakes you, opening your optics is a herculean task, and the sight of the medbay ceiling with all the supportive equipment hanging down and connecting to your frame is the reward.

“Well. Well. Well.” Knock Out steps over and quips, tapping on your shoulder. “Look who decided to rejoin us.”

“You look like slag.” Your voice crackles with static. It’s true. Prickles of stress lines on his face, his long digits lack the usual maintenance, and his optics shine bright with the manic energy that’s usually speed-induced.

“Really!? What a fine thanks I get for saving your life.” He scoffs and kicks out a rolling chair from beneath the medberth and sits next to you. “And congratulations, sweetspark. Two newsparks for the price of one sparklet. With the added bonus of near burnout.”

The question burns in your throat and your intake clicks embarrassingly loud in the silence. Knock Out uses the medberth to brace an elbow and lazily rest his face on his digits, curled to keep the talons from scratching his finish.

His gaze shifts to focus on the monitors as you blink away the welling tears. A moment passes and then he tuts, looking back to you, particularly pleased as Pits and taps on your chassis, near one of the supportive cables.

“I got your spark back to acceptable parameters and replaced the scorched lines and circuitry. And your little bundles-to-be are well-rooted down below. The surprise one has a solid coat of nanites. So far, they’re stabilizing quite well given the circumstances.” He says airily. “So, by the way, you’re welcome.”

“Hey, Doc.”

“Hmm?”

“Thanks.”

“Thank me with a can of my favorite polish. Oh, and not dying any time soon.” 

_________

“You’re sure you can make it your hab?” Breakdown stares at the wall above your helm. He can’t meet your optics, not after Knock Out disengaged the support systems, and since you're carrying and had suffered from extreme complications, there's the necessary cable stuffed up your valve and attached to the gestation chamber entrance to directly feed the newsparks.

Of course, Knock Out would have the nurse take care of it. Necessary training and petty revenge for your comment on his less-than-stellar appearance. 

“I’m fine." You look and feel terrible, but your legs hold long enough for you to brace against the wall. Breakdown won't meet your gaze, but he keeps track of your field and watches for any more shakiness. "It’s just a few floors away and I'm going back to bed."

"If you're sure…"

"Absolutely. And besides," You lazily point up to cameras that are stalled at the medbay entrance. “Common area security.”

It's a slow venture to the elevator. The few Vehicons do a double take at your presence, their HUDs are most likely telling them that the Nemesis does, in fact, has a Chief Engineer, they respectfully nod before continuing on their shifts.

The elevator door opens and Laserbeak greets your sight; levitating as she immediately drops a cube in your servos and returns to the corner.

Perfect timing; a short distance away from the medbay and you already feel slight hunger pangs. You drink it, the added supplements leave a thin residual but a nice tang. 

It takes far more effort than you like to admit, but you finally reach your habsuite.

Laserbeak hovers for a beat before settling on a nearby cabinet, the one packed to the brim with neatly labeled mini parts and old tools. You’re going to have to check if the writing matches the insides, but that’s a far-future problem.

What’s more immediate is the crib blueprints: still on your cluttered desk and waiting to be properly rescaled to comfortably fit two passengers.

You should work on it, but you're physically done and emotionally wrung out…

“Don’t you need to go back? My comms are fully functional. The SOS worked perfectly.” The forced cheer falls flat and off-key. 

No answer.

The berth is a welcomed sensation with its actual padding and real sheets. The few rare indulgences in your life since you mainly sleep in the walls. At least, you had.

“I can’t work anymore. I've been taken off." 

High-risk carriage. Your badge is now outlined in vivid green for the severe medical restriction. Perhaps you’ll take on a supervision role… 

Still no answer from the silent watcher.

That’s fine. You’re fine.

You idly rub your abdomen, warmer than usual now that the newsparks are finally there. Too underdeveloped to have any limbs or make a true response, but the heat is a good sign. You press down, not too hard, but it’s enough to feel some discomfort in the protoform through the armor; indicative of swelling, your frame is in the process of reconfiguring to properly expand for their growth.

They’re fine.

(If you repeat it enough, perhaps it’ll come true.)

[titsuya]

# RANDOM SMUT HEADCANONS 2

this NSFW headcanon includes short drabbles of some of my other fave HQ boys!

STARRING: KOZUME KENMA, OIKAWA TOORU, SUGAWARA KOUSHI, SAKUSA KIYOOMI, KUROO TETSUROU all w/ f!reader

warning: oral (m. receiving), daddy kink, creampie, exhibitionism, mead dom omi <3, degradation & possessiveness (mostly mean dom omi), thigh riding MINORS DNI 18+

a/n: links (hopefully lead to visuals), couldnt link kiyoomis sorry but i have the pic if anyone wants to see 😼— BUT HOPEFULLY U GUYS ENJOY

part one here ++ ask me stuff ++ m.list ++ <3

KOZUME KENMA

“but—“

“i said, no. ‘m busy. i’ll play with you later.”

you pout at your boyfriend who’s neglecting you and your very wet and needy cunt. just so he can play some stupid game.

“but ken! you know it’s wrong to ignore your girlfriend in her time of need!” you exclaim, leaning into pepper kisses all over his jaw.

he simply ignores you, so you sigh almost admitting defeat, but then an idea pops into your head.

you slowly move your hands down to the wait band of his pants. you pull his pants down a little till his cock pops out and smile as he huffs.

you stroke his length up and down before lowering your head to take the tip in your mouth.

he’s not gonna ignore me after i make him cum in my mouth, you think to yourself.

you continue to bob your head up and down, his cock getting harder and harder by the second, growing in your mouth.

the soft clacks of his control come to a halt as he sets it down and groans. he pushes your head all the way down to his base causing you to gasp and choke.

“yeah? since you wanna be such a needy little bitch, how bout you take my cock whole and then i’ll see if you deserve to get fucked.”

OIKAWA TOORU

��fuuuck! that’s it baby!” he cries.

he’s always been a crier. he cries and slurs his words and moans and whines. it’s all so good it always makes you cum violently.

“daddy!” you sob. “it feels so good! i love your cock!”

you’re only moving because he keeps lifting you up and slamming you back down. the head of his cock giving your cervix the deepest kisses.

it’s almost painful the way you’re fucking him.

he moans prettily, “l-love your tight tight pussy, fu-fuck! taking me so well!”

you take hold of his shoulders and try to put in some work, but only end up grinding him making the both of you sob more.

you press your lips to his and give him a feverish kiss.

he gasps and breaks the kiss when you clench around his cock, “b-babyy, not gonna last much longer!”

“cum in me! cum, need it! please!! need it in me!”

he cries out your name loudly, his cock twitching right before his cum shoots inside of you.

you don’t stop, though, not until you’ve cum one more time. you’re doing your best bouncing on his cock, but then you feel his thumb on your clit.

“cum on this cock, ‘s all yours,” he mewls and you all but arch your back and release all over him, crying out about how good it feels and how much you love him.

“good, good, but i think i’m gunna fuck some more of my cum into you.” he huffs, flipping the two of you over.

SUGAWARA KOUSHI

“shhh, you gotta be quiet, baby,” he whispers in your ear as his fingers pinch the small bundle of nerves. “unless you want daichi to know, hmm?”

you shudder as his breath tickles your ear, “‘m sorry,”

“‘s alright, he’s coming back with the food, you be a good girl and eat, alright?”

you nod and let out a small whimper before daichi takes his seat and hands us our food.

you feel his fingers trail down to your drenched hole and feel them prod in.

you gasp when he shoves two fingers in, immediately clenching around them.

he simply smirks before looking at you, “everything alright, love?” he asks, pumping his fingers in and out of your velvet walls at a painstaking pace.

“y-yeah, just forgot to feed the stray cat outside today!” you give a faux laugh and suga gives you a teasing smile.

you’re trying your absolute hardest not to make a single sound, but it’s so hard when sugawara keeps fucking you with fingers.

“fuck,” you whine, placing your hand over your mouth and both men look at you. concern plastered on daichi’s face while suga looks like he’s about to bust out laughing

“d-daichi, can you grab some napkins, please?” you ask, trying not to stutter.

daichi looks between the both of you and raises an eyebrow, suspiciously, “sure… i have to use the restroom, anyways, so i’ll grab some on my way back…”

he quickly leaves and suga turns to you again, “aww, i think he found out, doll,” he says like it wasn’t the plan.

he removes his fingers from your tight cunt and wraps his fingers around them to taste your essence.

“k-koushi!” you whine at the loss of contact, “b-but!”

“you should’ve kept your mouth shut.”

SAKUSA KIYOOMI

“o-omi, please!”

he’s been drilling into you for an hour, cumming inside of you load after load. but he’s also let you refused to let you cum.

your pussy is past overstimulated.

“why don’t i call suna here, maybe he can make you cum,” he growls, slapping your ass. “since you wanna flirt with him so bad.”

you’re sure the shape of his hand his printed was printed into the now-red skin.

“don’t want him, omi! promise! please,” you cry. “just wanna cum! just wanna be good!”

he scoffs, “you’re just a desperate little slut. what good is it if i let you cum? you’re not gonna learn your lesson that way.”

he thinks he’s being a little too rough, but the immediate clench around his cock at him calling you a slut proves him otherwise.

you’re sobbing and he can’t hold back his shaky moan at the sound, cock throbbing as he’s still painfully hard inside you.

“i learned my lesson, omi! pleaseplease it hurts!” you mewl, “i can’t!”

he feels himself about to cum so he mutters out a nearly inaudible, “cum.” but you hear it behind all the squelching of his cock pounding your sopping pussy.

you press your face into the pillow as you scream out a muffled version of his name, clamping down and cumming all over his cock.

he cums shortly after with a loud groan and pulls out watching the cum leak out of you.

he clears his throat and puts his clothes back on, but before walking out, he turns to look at your limp body.

“remember that you’re my bitch, not suna’s, not anyone’s. mine.”

KUROO TETSUROU

“hey kitten, what’s going on here?” kuroo asks as he walks into the living room to see you pouting.

you pout some more, crossing your arms over your chest and ignoring him.

he sighs and takes a seat on the couch.

“come here,” he says. “tell me what’s wrong, kitten. i can’t fix it if you don’t tell me.”

you sigh, crawling over to straddle his thigh. “you left and didn’t kiss me or say bye. what if something happened?”

he coos, smiling at how cute you were, “‘m sorry, baby, i’ll be sure to do that next time. can i make it up to you?”

you shrug, shyly and his grin widens. his hands move to your waist and slowly, he begins to rock you on his thigh.

you gasp, softly, at the sudden movements, but decide to go along with it. your core, covered by the thin materials of your panties, already soaked.

you let out a soft moan when you start to feel the the friction increase.

“that’s a good kitten, letting me make it up to you,” he murmurs, basking in your beauty. “hopefully you forgive me,”

“a-ah!” you grind into his thigh harder, using it like it’s a toy. “i forgive you, daddy!”

the pressure in your tummy increases and after a few seconds, you cum with your head thrown back and hands gripping his shoulders tightly.

“good, baby, now how about i let you cum on my cock next?”

© all works belong to @titsuya 2021, please do not repost, modify, or translate any of my works on any platform

[livelle]

yo olii!! can i just say i really love ur writing and i have an idea which i think you might be interested in,,, its alr if not but could you write a tommy or ranboo x reader having their first kiss kinda like ross and rachels'? here's the link for inspiration

hope u have a nice day!! xoxo, 🦎 anon

a/n: THIS. REQUEST. 🦎 anon, I LOVE YOU WITH MY WHOLE ENTIRE HEART THIS REQUEST IS SO CUTE!! I’ve always loved their first kiss it was just my kind of romantic, and it fits my blog on here so well! Thank you for this lovely request, it made me so happy! I hope this is close to what you wanted, if not, I’ll try again! 💌

I want to thank you guys all so much for 400 followers oh my god!! Like, I genuinely do not deserve you. You guys are the sweetest, loving, most welcoming people to me and you have no idea how each and everyone of you makes me smile. Thank you for that. Thank you for the support, I am so thankful!!! In honor of this, I will try to post as much as I can this weekend. As you guys know i have been gone for a bit because of my busy schedule, and it still is busy, but I hope I can make something of it!

Mwuah!

^ this has been my fav pic of him recently, look at the pretty boy

‘FINE!’ ‘FINE.’

a Tommyinnit/ You!!

summary: you and Tommy have been best friends for what feels like ages, hanging out along with your friend group every day for the past few years. You had known he had feelings for you at one point, but when you finally returned those feelings, he was unavailable. You two fight about it, and then something happens.

NO PRONOUNS USED

ROMANTIC ( starts kinda angsty )

cw: yelling, discussion/ fight, emotional talk, kissing?!!!!

It was late, too late for you to mask what you were really feeling. So you didn’t. You were layed out on your couch, and your best friend Tommy was rambling on about how his day was, and about that person he’s been seeing lately. It kind of was your fault, you asked about it, but still. Didn’t need to hear about their cheesy date when you’re utterly in love with him.

‘Yeah and then I brought them home, it was so nice..’ he looked over at you. Ugh. You sighed, and rolled your eyes in annoyance. ‘What?’ He mumbled, he apparently noticed your response. ‘Oh nothing.’ you yawned. ‘Yeah no, what’s up??’ he asked, he wasn’t gonna let this go, you already knew. ‘It’s just, you’ve been talking about them all day. I’m happy for you Tom, but it’s pretty shit when I’m the one who’s head over heels with yo-‘ your tired eyes widened. No. You didn’t just let that slip out.

You turned around to watch his reaction, and his jaw fell open. Shit, you had ruined it all now. ‘What? What.. WHAT?!!’ He yelled out. ‘No,’ he started shaking his head, you could see his eyes well up with emotion. ‘NOW?! You, you tell me this now?’ ‘I- I didn’t mean to’ you tried, but he shook his head violently. ‘I’ve loved you since we met, four years ago. You probably noticed. And now, when I’m finally happy, you decide to say that?!!’ his voice echoed through your living room. ‘Then why didn’t you tell me?? We only hung out EVERY NIGHT, for four years!?’ you returned a frown at him. ‘You were.. you were caught up with other things, other people!! You obviously didn’t like me! And now, after all that time, you tell me?’ He spoke back harshly. ‘Well, I didn’t know then I had feelings for you-‘ you started, but got cut off by him again. ‘EXACTLY. And you have NO right to tell me this now. I’m happy with them you know,’ he told you, but the expression on his face and tears in his eyes didn’t back that up. ‘You know what, FINE!’ You screamed out. ‘FINE.’ Tommy spat angrily. He mumbled a few things before grabbing his coat and leaving, the door slammed, and the room left behind coldly.

You watched him leave through the glass pain in your door, and let your eyes wander through the soaked streets, rain falling down rapidly. You sunk down on the nearest chair and buried your face in your hands. You couldn’t help it; you let a sob leave your throat. Everything was ruined, it all got even worse. You sniffled. You wiped your cheek and stood up to go to bed, and have your breakdown over there. You were stopped by a pair of eyes looking back at you sadly. You looked out the door window, and there he stood again, wet blonde hair, and his blue eyes full up with guilt. Tom was looking at you, he had returned. He leaned against your door, and you felt yourself move towards it suddenly.

With shaking hands you opened the door. You looked up at him. Without words, he brought his hands up to cup your face and he kissed you. The kiss was a much needed one, one you both had been waiting for for years. And it was more perfect than ever.

There was no attention paid to the open door, it was only you two, your bodies together, and his lips on yours.

He let go, he smiled for a second, and moved back to capture your lips in a loving kiss.

You’ll figure it out, but this was good for now.

a/n: HEY GUYSS I needed some Tommy comfort and I could totally picture this so I loved writing this! I’m sorry that it’s so short, and it probably has typos but I’m in such a hurry rn so ttyl!

I love you guys with my entire heart, thank you for being here my god’s / goddesses <3

@milofroglover @oolovebunnyoo @kiss-me-more-whore @woahitsjj @ohlovejoy @marsmarsss