#so you end up in a total alternate reality | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

arcanewhoosh · 9 days ago

Note

hiii how are you? I hope ur doing well!

I dont know if your requests are open or not so if they aren’t feel free to just ignore this :)

i was wondering if you could write a jinx X female reader (if not female gn is totally alright whatever you’re comfortable with) a soulmate au with jinx where it’s the reader who goes to the alternative universe instead of ekko, but instead of just going to one universe, the reader ends up going to multiple ones. she/they find out that jinx is her/their partner in every universe, in every timeline, in every possibility, making them soulmates.

I actually made a post about this idea, asking if anyone could write it, but I also wanted to ask you as well because I just adore your writing so so sooo much. I could honestly read your work for hours without getting bored or tired.

I Think We're Kind of Made for Each Other

This work will be posted (with an additional scene) on AO3 here. Please note that the work posted there will be tagged as Explicit

24.3k words

Proofread? Y/N

Relevant Tags: JinxXReader, Female Reader, Soulmates AU, Multiple timelines, Violence, Major character death, Suicide, Self-Harm, Alcohol consumption, Original side character, Canon compliant, LoL characters

When the anomaly at the Hex Gate transports you and your friends across realities, you're forced to confront the different lives you live in each one. But will you be able to accept a hard truth when you face the only constant thing in every timeline?

A/N: I just wanted to say, that this has to be my magnum opus. I don't think I can write another oneshot this long. To be fair, the idea had been floating in my head for a while, so when the request came, I kinda went crazy. And to think I thought I could write this in a day lol.

Nevertheless, I had a lot of fun writing. I highly encourage you to read some of my other stuff, purely because there are a few references in this story.

Please enjoy. And if you like it, feel free to share with your friends.

One

The feeling of wetness on the side of your face wakes you up—your entire left side, actually—as a dull ache starts to throb in your head. Barely register the rain pelting down on you, as you open your eyes and try to catch your bearings.

There's a loud ringing in your ears, but you can make out muffled shouting and gunfire, the sizzling in the air followed by a boom. It triggers the fight or flight response in you, but everything is hurting and you can't remember how you even ended up here. You should be doing something right now, but for the life of you, you can't figure out what.

Your hand wipes at your ear as you open your eyes to inspect it, an unsurprising streak of red on your fingers is starting to smear as the rain continues to pour. Your vision swims for a few seconds, and you figure a concussion is going to be added along with the possible ruptured eardrum in your list of injuries.

Thankfully, your gaze focuses on the sight in ahead of you. The familiar bridge dividing Piltover and Zaun, cracked and blown off at sections. There are armed people hiding behind a barricade on your side of the bridge, shooting at enforcers at the other end of the bridge.

You plant your hands on the concrete and try to push yourself up, getting to about knee level before a sharp pain in your foot knocks the wind out of you and fall back down. It only occurs to you now to look down and inspect the rest of you. Banged up, caked in dirt and blood—Whose blood was that?—and your clothes torn at odd places. Your foot is still there, and it's not dangling off at an awkward angle, at least. You grit your teeth and try to move the injured limb. The pain wracks through your body, but your foot moves nonetheless. Sprained, not broken; good.

An explosion next to you pulls you back into reality and starts up your sense of urgency as you crawl away to cover. You hide behind a fallen pillar and try to get your bearings. A number of people run past you, all carrying guns and explosives from what you can make out—Why are we in a gun fight with the Pilties?—all ignoring you as they erect more barricades and set their weapons up. It might be the adrenaline, but you can't for the life of you remember how you ended up in this situation. What the hell were you doing here?

You close your eyes and try to block out the pain from your head and ankle, willing yourself to recall the events prior this firefight.

This was all planned. Carefully planned over the course of years.

The painstaking effort it took to build weapon factories in the fissures to stay out of Piltover's radar.

the underground hand-to-hand combat classes.

"You know, you say we should feel like we're all one people—"

Expanding Zaun southwards to facilitate growth for the future.

"Is that a wild rune?"

"I have no idea what that is."

Noxus antagonizing you for trying to build a better city for your people.

"No, don't touch it!"

"Ekko--"

Your thoughts are interrupted when a pair of hands grab you by your shoulders. Your eyes snap open at the figure in front of you, her pink eyes all too familiar with you. She looks worried—about you, no less—and affection blooms in your chest the same time a feeling of repulsion comes over you. Jinx, you try to say, but you're still reeling from your injuries and your attempt to recall what had just happened, and you're not able to utter a word. She's speaking, but you can barely make out what she's saying because of the ringing in your ears. You try to read her lips, but your mind is too hazy to make sense of her words.

She realizes that you're not understanding her at all, and she spots the blood still coming out of your ear. She gingerly wipes off some of the blood with a gloved hand, and you instinctively—instinctively??—lean into her touch. She pulls out a small vial with a needle at the end of it. The pink glow of its contents immediately tells you that it's shimmer, as Jinx takes off the cover with her mouth and spits it out to the side.

"No." You say. At least you think you do, you can't really hear yourself. You hand grabs her wrist holding the needle, but she's faster and leans her hand away just out of reach from you. She grabs your own with her free hand, and gives you an apologetic look. You're not sure why, but you can almost tell that she's trying to say this'll help, I promise.

The smile alone is enough to make you relent, and a part of you is bewildered at the fact. Still, you put your hand down and let her stab the needle into your thigh, its contents seeping through.

You lurch forward at the sensation, but she catches you and holds you as you tense up from the high that shimmer delivers with it. You grab onto her as you wait for the effects to subside.

"It's okay, you're okay, I've got you." She whispers into your hair. You relax, slowly but surely. Besides the fogginess you still feel, you're a million gold coins. You gently push yourself away, taking a look around, your sense suddenly heightened. A short side effect of shimmer, if you remember right.

"Jinx." You finally manage. "Are you okay?"

She scoffs, but you know that it's not out of hostility. "Don't you think I should be asking you that?"

She has a point. A part of you wants to contradict her for the fun of it, but this isn't the place, or time. You peek over the side of the pillar, the barricades are holding strong, even gaining ground over Piltover. The momentary safety provided by cover is enough for you pull Jinx and yourself on your feet.

Her face if covered in dirt and grease. She was supposed to be working on Fishbones, away from the front lines. "You're supposed to be on higher ground."

"I'm not gonna sit on my ass while you're all here risking your lives. Besides—" She pushes a rifle onto you. "Fishbones is ready. Once the Noxian's ship is even an inch within range, they're done for."

You shake your head. "You're better if you're--"

"No." She starts. She has a determined look in her eye, the same one she sports when she wants you to drop an argument. And you drop it, every single time.

"I'm just as good as a shot as you. And we're winning." She gestures toward the bridge, where the line of enforcers and Noxians troops are slowly but surely backing away. "We'll need as many boots here as we can. You said it yourself, the hardest part is gonna be holding the line once they call for negotiations."

Your grip tightens on the rifle. You were so close to freeing Zaun. Wait what?

Freeing Zaun? No, you needed to save your tree, with the firelights, and all the refugees. You needed to find Ekko, and Heimerdinger, and Jayce. Jinx… Jinx was the enemy. She killed your friends before, blown up your safehouses, let Silco flood the streets with shimmer—

"The Noxians ships are here!"

You both turn to the east side of the bridge, and spot the fleet approaching. Their pace glacial because of the narrow path on the water. They start deploying smaller boats filled with their soldiers, headed for the small docks on your side of the bridge. You turn back to Jinx, her eyes are still trained on you. She takes a breath, and opens her mouth to say something--

"Cap! We're armed and ready!" A blob of pink hair catches your attention; it's Vi, waving over to you from a distance away. "Give the signal!" You look up to the rooftops above her, a group of people rolling three launchers forward, all trained on the large vessels in the water. The blue glow coming from the HexTech gemstone running through lines on the launchers they were all hauling. One for each ship.

"This is it." You say as you grab Jinx's arm. "Go take cover."

"And leave you here? Fat chance."

"Jinx."

"I'm staying." This stubborn little—You sigh, now was not the time for a petty argument. You were about to give the go signal for a possible war-ending—or war escalating—attack. You settle for pulling Jinx with you as you zigzag towards where Vi is, bullets flying everywhere.

"We're armed and ready." She says as she crouches next to you. You know you can't delay the command, but a pit settles in your stomach as the weight of your decisions starts to sink in. The number of lives that'll be lost from this.

But you don't have the luxury in time, not in war. All you have is the culmination of your split second decisions and the consequences that follow.

"Tell them to fire." You state it with such calmness that it surprises the three of you. Vi nods, nonetheless, and gives the signal to the fighters on the rooftop.

In the few seconds that the high pitched screech of the launchers resonate through the air, the battlefields becomes silent. All eyes trained on the rooftops of Zaun, then the Noxian ships.

The first rocket hits a ship. A loud bang is heard as it makes contact, followed by a muffled explosion as smoke starts to billow out of the ship. The vessel stops moving, and a line of soldiers dressed in red start abandoning ship as fires start erupting out of doors and windows. The other two ships follow the same fate. A loud bang, an explosion, the smoke, and people desperately trying to get away.

You stare at the horrific sight in front of you. There are no sounds from the guns firing from each side, no bangs from projectiles being launched from mini Hex gates. Everyone has stopped whatever they were doing and were now watching people on ships, trying to escape the inferno quickly building up.

Your head throbs, and you stumble as you try to walk towards the bridge. Jinx catches you as you fall to your knees, your head suddenly as heavy as lead, the ringing in your ears returning, louder this time. Jinx is trying to tell you something, but your vision begins to blur, and you feel like you need to just… shut your eyes for a few moments.

-----

Two

"Hey, Ms. Port Master extraordinaire? Hello?"

The snap of fingers brings you out of your stupor. You blink a few times before clearing your throat.

"Sorry." You try to flash a smile to the woman in front of you. Her eyes scrutinize you for a brief moment, seemingly trying to figure out what was going on in your mind, before her infuriatingly attractive smirk adorns her face.

"Didn't peg you for a lightweight."

You snort as you take a sip from your glass. "I'm not a lightweight."

"The zoning out is kind of a dead giveaway."

"I wasn't zoning out. I was lost in your eyes."

"You weren't even looking at me."

"I had to look away cause I was getting lost in your eyes?"

She lightly punches your arm—damn she's strong—before leaning against the counter of the busy bar. You sit close to each other, citing the noisy atmosphere and the hindrance that would cause during your conversation, but you both know better. You wanted to sit close because she was, pardon your French, too fucking attractive. Hers, you weren't sure yet, but you'd be able to find out eventually.

"I'm guessing you don't get lost in all of your customers' eyes, too?"

"Just yours." You’re not a lightweight, that much you’re certain. Tipsy, however, you very much are. If the brazen flirting wasn’t making it obvious enough.

"And you weren't out last night with some poor girl who also had engine troubles?" You put a hand over your chest.

"You're breaking my heart here, blue." The feigned hurt in your voice does little to deter the eye roll that Powder gives you. You let out a laugh as you put your hands up as a mock sign of peace. "Hey, I swear I was trying my best to be professional earlier, but I'm off the clock now, so I can flirt as much as I want."

"Oh, we're flirting?" You furrow your brows at her.

"Was that not clear?"

"Nah, not really."

"Do you platonically get lost in people's eyes?"

"Maybe. How do I know you don't take girls here every night? I could ask the bartender."

"Go ahead, he's an unbiased party. Besides," You shrug. "Even if I did, I'm a regular here so he wouldn't snitch on me."

"Don't put words in my mouth you muppet." the burly man working behind the bar walks towards the two of you, refilling your drinks. He winks at Powder. "Don't worry love, I'd sell this one for a sack of potatoes--"

"Hey!"

"But." He says, a thick eyebrow raised at you. "Lil' missy here isn't a revolving door of lovers. In fact, I don't reckon' she's ever brought someone here. Or landed a date, actually—" Powder snorts into her drink, and you take it as a sign that it's time to usher the barkeep away.

"Okay, thank you Ed, for the refills. I think there's some people asking for you over there." Ed laughs as he lumbers over to the other side of the bar. You keep your eyes on him until you're sure that he's occupied, before turning back to Powder. "I do in fact, get dates. For the record."

"Oh, of course, I totally believe you."

"I mean it."

"Completely believe you."

"Okay, now you're just messing me." Your ego is a bit bruised at Ed's interruption, the shit eating grin on Powder's face isn't helping either. But she's smiling, and for some ungodly reason, you consider it as a win. You shake your head and take a longer sip from your drink, why the hell were you so sappy all of a sudden?

"Okay, okay. Sorry, toots." She nudges you with her shoulder. "No more teasing."

You raise an eyebrow at her. "No more bruising my ego?" She shakes her head and crosses over her heart.

"Nope. Serious questions only, from this point forward."

"Oh? Like what?" You turn to her and prop your chin on your hand.

"Like…" She bites her lip and looks at a random spot on the wall of drinks across from you, momentarily in thought. At this point, you're not even trying to hide your staring. She doesn't call you out on it when she looks back at you, but a small smirk plays at her face. “You’re drunk.”

“Just as drunk as you are.”

“I’m not drunk yet.”

“You’re literally slurring your words right now.”

“…I’m tipsy.”

You do your best to hold back a chuckle. “Hi tipsy—“

“Gods, please don’t.” She groans and hides her face in her hands. “I was just starting to find you attractive.”

“I thought we were done bruising my ego?”

“The dad jokes make you free real estate.”

“Okay, alright.” You laugh. Gently prying her hands away from her face. “Just ask me your question.“

She relents, but doesn’t let go of you as she sets her hand down the counter. “Hmm…”

“Did you grow up here?”

“Here? No, I only came here about five years ago. Looking for my great perhaps and all.” A momentary ring in your ear causes your breath to hitch, but Powder doesn’t seem to notice.

“Where are you from?” She continues, her eyes slightly glazed but reflecting her curiosity.

“I’m from—“

The Free Nation of Zaun

The Undercity

Why the hell would I tell you?

“Hey.” Jinx gives your hand a gentle squeeze. You do your damn best not to yank your hand away. “I’m sorry, you don’t have to tell me.”

Bilgewater, you’re from Bilgewater.

“No, it’s okay.” You squeeze her hand back before she has the chance to pull away. "Could you give me a second?"

You wait for her to nod before you push yourself off the stool and make your way to the bathroom. You quickly lock the door and rest your head against it. The ringing in your ears returns, and your breathing becomes ragged. "Where the hell am I?" You look over to the bathroom mirror, and you're surprised to see the figure standing in front of you.

Your hair is different; your face—you look healthier? Not someone who grew up in the Undercity. You walk over to the sink, planting both hands on either side, scrutinizing your features further. It's you alright, somehow. Only it's also not.

Born in Bilgewater, left for adventure, ended up here working at the port.

"No." You shut your eyes as you shake your head. "I was born in the Undercity, I'm a firelight, we came across a wild rune and… now I'm here. I need to find Ekko, and Jayce, and Heimerdinger." You repeat the words a few more times, just to make sure you don't forget. The sound of water flowing out of the faucet as you turn a knob offers little comfort, but the cold sensation of the water when you splash your face helps.

You're about to turn and exit the bathroom when you spot something on your arm. A small thing, peeking out of your sleeve. You gasp as you pull your sleeve back, the web-like patterns of the wild rune threading a line over your forearm.

You needed to find out what was happening, and why you've already encountered Jinx twice, every time you did whatever you were doing. Were you hallucinating? Did you just hit your head and was currently having a really trippy dream? You decide to think this over once you shake off Jinx, Powder, whoever she is. Easier said than done, since you kept acting like some lovesick fool.

When you return to the bar, Jinx is still there. Her back is turned to you, but her shoulders are slumped in a way that you can immediately tell that she's not in a good mood.

"Oi." Ed flicks your ear, ignoring your protest. "What the hell are you doing, making that sweet lass upset?"

I wouldn't use sweet to describe her.

"Sorry, I—uh, I'll fix it."

"Damn right you will. You come across someone like that once every lifetime." He pushes you toward the bar, before going back to clear a table.

"Sorry about that." Her head whips up in surprise, clearly not expecting you to be back. "Lost myself for a bit there."

"I…I thought you snuck out, honestly. It's no big deal, happens sometimes." She shrugs, her shoulders tense. She's trying to be nonchalant about you suddenly excusing yourself, but she was still slurring her words, and her gestures were becoming uncoordinated, so it wasn't really working. She looked more upset the more she tried to play it off.

You reach over the bar and grab a pitcher of water and a glass, filling it up and handing it over to her. "I'm really sorry about that."

She glares at the glass before reluctantly downing its contents "S'fine." A few beats of silence pass, and you unexpectedly feel guilt start to bubble up in your chest. No. No. No.

“I grew up in Bilgewater.”

"Huh?"

"You asked earlier, where I was from? Bilgewater. Terrible place, really."

She folds her arms on the counter and rests her head on them, closing her eyes. “Why’d you leave?”

“You get sick of the smelly pirates? Though, I do have to give them credit, their wild stories of adventure and conquest is what made me leave in the first place.”

"You didn't just join some random ship?"

You chuckle. "And get myself killed for some dumb mistake? No thanks." You refill her glass with water, before picking up your own and swirling the brown liquid around. You recall working in a bar, up in the higher levels of Bilgewater, where adventurers spent the coin that they made from their exploits, before begrudgingly having to go back down and gather a crew to earn more. A vicious that kept repeating itself. Sometimes, if they were lucky, the whole crew would survive, but those instances were few and far in between.

Memories. You realize. These are all your memories, or, whoever you are here, at least.

A properly functioning Hex Gate was capable of transporting ships across continents in a split second. Does this mean a magically screwed up one could transport you to a different life entirely? Was it because of the remnants of the anomaly on your arm?

You shake your head, this was stuff that Ekko was good at, not you. You needed to find him, fast.

But first, take care of this one.

As if on cue, you hear a light snore come from next to you. Jinx is knocked out, clearly not bothered by how she's awkwardly hunched over the counter. You sigh, you have no idea how to get back home, but you decide to handle that issue tomorrow. Right now, you had a drunk Jinx to take care of.

Thankfully, you remember where you live, because having to haul around a drunk Jinx was difficult enough. Small victories though, as you realize that this is better than being stuck in the middle of a battle field. You settle yourself on your bay window, looking over to Jinx's sleeping form on your bed. Tomorrow, you'd start figuring out a way to get home. For now, you'll try to get your first wink of sleep in Gods know how long.

-----

Twenty-eight

In the indiscernible amount of time that has passed—for you, at least—you've come to realize the following things:

You are not hallucinating, nor did you hit your head, you are, in fact, jumping through universes and different versions of yourself.

The first hurdle you had to get through was getting your bearings when you'd get thrown into another universe. It took a few tries, but eventually, you were able to come to your senses immediately after jumping to the next plane of existence you were in. You always repeated the mantra you made back in the second jump you did, the last thing you needed was to forget where you came from. The thought of aimlessly wandering through universes, feeling like you've lost your mind, you can't even imagine how terrible that would be. You needed to find the others as soon as you can.

The length of stay always varied and timelines can repeat, but there are always miniscule variations.

This was still a working theory. You've only repeated a timeline once, but you had enough wits about you to realize that some objects were a different color to their preceding counterpart, or that instead of Ekko explaining something to you, it was Scar. With how long you'd stay, there were a few instances when you'd only stay for a few minutes, but the rest spanned to about a week at the longest.

Somehow, some way, you and Jinx are connected in some way, shape, or form. In every. Single. One.

The last one was especially jarring, considering you had never even met Jinx officially back in your universe. Sure, you’ve had run-ins with her because the Firelights would frequently be trying to intercept shimmer routes, but you don't think barely surviving one of her chompers counted as an introduction. On top of that, she was your enemy back home, but in every single jump you've had so far, the two of you had a somewhat established relationship. This was good, in a way, because at least you didn't have to be on your guard constantly while you tried to figure out a way to get home.

"I can hear you thinking from over here."

Speak of the devil.

You ignore the comment from your friend. Emphasis on friend. In this universe it seemed, the both of you were Academy students in Piltover, mercifully platonic. You decided to do your best to study wild runes and HexTech when you could, but it proved to be difficult when you were distracted by that Other You's feelings for Jinx. At least this place gave you access to a literal sea of books and a clear enough mind.

"Hey, don't ignore me." Jinx opts to lightly tug at the top half of the book you're reading, and you can see her blue eyes peek through the space. That's right, no shimmer exposure in this universe.

"I'm studying." You deadpan, hoping she'll leave you alone. You get a mock imitation of your words, instead.

"No you're not, none of our classes are even looking into dusty old books about runes." She has a point. Truth be told, you're supposed to be studying about ethical practices in the field of body modification for utility uses. Which was close to nothing, really. But you can't really tell Jinx why you're reading about runes, now, can you?

"Have you ever heard of this thing called supplementary reading?" You shake the book off of her fingers, and go back to your futile attempt to learn about magic. Not that this book was any use, there wasn't even a list of runes and their definitions on here. The girl in front of you leans back on her chair and lets out an exasperated sigh.

"Ugh, you're boring. Let's go do something fun!" Her foot kicks at your shoe from under the table, and you have to lift both feet up to avoid her kicks.

"Hey! Not everyone can sleep through every class and still get high marks, Jinx." You scoot your chair out from under the table to put distance between the two of you. "Some of us have to actually study."

"What's studying without any field experience?"

"Pipe down. The librarian is gonna kick us both out, again."

She sticks her tongue out at you, but lowers her voice. "Come on, I'm dying of boredom here!" She splays out her upper half on the table, arms toppling over some of the papers and books you—Very neatly!—stacked for reference.

Your mouth forms a thin line, her rowdy, and playful personality had become apparent to you once you went through a few more universes. She'd get pissed if you ignored her for too long, but the structured environment of the Academy hindered a her from having any outbursts. So you opt to continue reading your books instead of taking the bait, quashing any urge from the You of this universe to make a side comment about her behavior.

She continues with her ranting about you not having any fun or having a stick up your ass. Her jabs get progressively more offensive, but that's how her and the Other You here interact. It's not fun for you yourself, because you didn't have the patience to make a jab at her without losing your cool.

You rub an eyebrow with one your hands, before gripping the book, willing yourself to focus on the next few pages in case they provide any useful information. You try to tune out the other girl, who has thankfully gone quiet.

You move book to book, thankful that this version of you could read and absorb information so fast. Sadly, you couldn't find anything about wild runes. Looks like Piltover was strict about distancing itself from magic as much as they could.

You don't look up from your book until you hear a grumbling from in front of you.

"What was that?" You close your book and pile it onto the Useless pile--which was all of them, really--and raise an eyebrow at Jinx, whose arms are crossed and is looking off to the side.

"doyouwannageticecream" You blink.

"Jinx, I'm not gonna understand a word you say if you keep grumbling like that."

She rolls her eyes. "I said, do you wanna get ice cream? or something."

Huh, how random.

"I made you upset earlier, and ice cream makes people feel better so..."

"I wasn't upset" You were.

"Yeah you were."

"I was annoyed."

"I know your annoyed face from your upset face."

"There's a difference?"

"So you were!" She slams her hand on the table, and is met by an irate librarian shushing her. You're once again taken aback by how different each Jinx behaves from the others. Where you were sure your universe's Jinx would have shot that poor woman, this one sheepishly rubs the back of her neck and throws a peace sign at her. If you weren't exposed to your universe's Jinx, you would have found her behavior cute. But you were exposed, so it absolutely isn't, and you're not going to play along with her to make her feel better.

"Thank for the offer jinx, but I'm not really in the mood to get ice cream." Good. "...and I'm not mad at you, or anything." You swear the last part was added in by Other You. Nonetheless, this seems to work as Jinx relaxes, resigning to making paper airplanes with the notes you had made while you went back to reading.

"Wanna break into Giopara's lab?" She starts.

"No."

"I think you'd want to—"

"No."

"If you say so." the singsong tone in her voice and the in caring shrug sets off alarm bells in your head. She's baiting you again.

Your eyes narrow at her. "You're being weird."

"No I'm not. I just thought—seeing as you're all interested in runes all of a sudden--you'd want to look at Giopara's vast book collection on that very subject."

"How the hell would you even know that?"

"Cause," She shrugs again. "He keeps saying I'm not living up to my potential and tries to make me read more Hex Tech origin stuff."

Your mouth hangs open, but you manage to close it before Jinx calls you a blubbering fish. "Wait a second. You're saying you've been reading about runes and Hex Tech?"

"Yup."

"So you know that the books here in the library are useless?"

"Mhm."

"And you've been letting me waste my time reading through them like an idiot?"

She sits back in her chair and crosses her arms. "They're not useless. They're just... Not useful."

"You're such a dick sometimes." Your remark is loud enough that the librarian to shush you as well. You whisper a sorry before turning back to Jinx.

"And you always have a stick up your ass." She whispers loudly.

"Yeah cause someone has to keep you from getting yourself killed, or worse, expelled!"

She snorts. "Really toots? Getting expelled is worse than getting killed?"

"The chances of getting expelled are higher with you, unfortunately."

She leans forward conspiratorially, a grin on her face. You don't notice yourself mirror her. "So come with me to break into his office, so I don't get expelled. Don't you want to read all those rune books? He doesn't even keep track of what gets taken out of there."

"Then why don't you just borrow them during lab hours?"

"What fun is that?"

"Jinx!"

"We'll be quick, five minutes, tops. And you'll have your dumb rune books." You grit your teeth. On one hand, You could just ask her to teach you what she knows. But you've known her—Other You!—your whole life, so you're a hundred percent sure that you'd have to pry that information out of her cold, dead, hands. On the other, Jayce's head was so far up in his own ass that Jinx was probably correct in saying he wouldn't notice any missing books.

I also don't know when I'll be yanked into another universe. There was also that.

"How sure are you that you can get us in and out that fast?"

"A million percent. Dude forgets to lock the door sometimes." She's already standing up and shoving all of your notes into your book bag, your eye twitches just the tiniest bit, before your head snaps up to look at her.

"How do you know that?" You ask as you start carrying the books to the book trolley.

"You're asking too many questions here. Less talking, more walking. Go, go, go." She ushers you out into the hallway, and the both of you start walking towards the east wing of the academy. The sun had already set, so there were much less students loitering. Still, the both of you err on the side of caution and stick to the lesser used hallways where the custodians had already turned off the lights.

You eventually find your way to the front of Jayce's lab, and Jinx wastes no time kneeling on front of the door and pulling out what looked like tools and shoving them into the door knob. This is definitely not her first breaking and entering.

"Where the hell did you get lockpicks?!" You do your best to keep your voice down, the allure of learning about runes slowly dissipating, panic replacing it.

"What did I say about less talking?" She whips around and raises her eyebrows at you, right as she turns the doorknob and opens the previously locked door.

"We're so fucked."

"You know, if we weren't stretched for time, I'd be celebrating you breaking your curse word quota for the day." She yanks her tools out of the door knob, and pushes you into the lab.

The room is nearly pitch black. Thankfully, the unlit hallways were enough for your eyes to adjust to the darkness. The low light from the moon streaming through the windows the only thing helping with your vision. Somehow, Jinx is able to navigate just fine.

"Okay, how often do you actually break in here?"

"How often is underground robot fight club again?" Robot fight club. The only thing Jinx is willing to wake up early for. Wait a second—

"Jinx!" You don't bother lowering your voice. Hoping that the closed room would be enough to muffle any sounds from coming into the hallway.

"What?"

"That's twice a week!"

"Where did you think we were getting our parts?"

"You said you knew a guy!"

"Clearly." She gestures around the room, where there were plenty of scattered machinery parts. Your face pales slightly; this Jinx was going to get You expelled, surely.

"You made me an accessory!"

"And now you're committing the crime. Congratulations, you've been promoted." She opens another door and theatrically gestures at the room. "Your little rune books await, oh great stuck-up one."

You roll your eyes at her and enter the room without any fanfare. Immediately you see that the all four walls of the room are lined with bookshelves as high as the ceiling. In the middle, a large wooden table with charts and books scattered across. Jinx stops next to you and nudges you with her shoulders. "Told 'ya. Worth the risk, right?"

"That's still up in the air."

She scoffs. "You totally think it is."

You don't want to give her the satisfaction of a reaction, but you don't even notice that you're grinning back at her until she puts an arm around your shoulders and waves her hand flippantly at the shelves. Other You's stomach does a backflip.

No. Absolutely not.

"So what are we looking for?"

You once again quash whatever physical reaction you're having. Now was definitely not the time. You walk out of her arm's reach and resort to looking around the spines of the books, already trying to spot their titles. "Wild runes."

There's a beat of silence before you hear her walking around the carpeted floor. "Wild runes huh? Yeah, I think I've seen a few of those around. Don't think I read them, though."

"That's fine." You start rifling around the shelves. Reading through anything that looked promising.

Jinx is the first to break the silence. She usually is. "So what are these books for, again?"

"I told you, supplementary reading. Also there isn't much to read on out ethics class so might as well fill my time with something fun."

Jinx doesn't reply, and you're happy to keep on reading through your books until you get a nagging feeling that you've just done something wrong.

You turn around to look at Jinx, who was plopped down on the floor and half-heartedly pulling books out, before seemingly placing them somewhere else at random. You mentally kick yourself when you notice that her shoulders are slumped. Opting to put the book search on hold, you walk over to her, hesitating for a moment before sitting down next to her.

"You know you can tell me stuff, right?" Her voice is quiet, and it's unsettling that you have the sudden urge to comfort her.

Yes, yes of course. This version of you felt completely at ease with Jinx. But you can't afford to be distracted by affection that wasn't even yours to begin with. If only you could explain that you've been universe-hopping and that in every single one of them you were in love or falling in love with her, and that you were trying to at least stall in this one so you could get as much information as you could before you got dragged into a different timeline again.

You can't, not really. But you know better than to try to lie to her.

"I think there might be another side to Hex Tech that we haven't discovered yet."

She stops rearranging the books and turns to you slightly. "What do you mean?"

"Like... Equal and opposite reactions."

"You think Hex Tech might have negative effects?" You feel your guilt lift at the curious glint in her eyes as you nod.

"Something like that. It's just a theory, though. I don't have anything to back it up."

"Well," She stands up and heads over to a shelf at the far wall. Pulling out an old looking tome. "I think this is just the book you're looking for." She blows off dust from the cover, coughing lightly from the cloud that forms. You quickly stand up and walk toward her, looking over the tome.

My ticket home—

"I don't care if they think I'm hogging too many testing hours, my methods actually work."

The door in the other room slams shut, you and Jinx immediately crouch down and move to turn the light off. Your eyes barely have time to adjust before Jinx pulls you over to the window.

"Are you crazy? We're on the second floor!" You whisper as she tries to pry it open.

"Less talking, more helping." As if on cue, you hear ruffling near the door. Less talking, more helping.

You help Jinx open the window, one hand still clutching the tome. You pray to every God out there that Jayce actually won't realize he's missing a book. The both of you swing your legs over the edge, and you grab onto the wall, suddenly feeling very nauseous. Jinx on the other hand, is grinning like a maniac.

"Aim for the bushes."

"Aim for the wha—"

You're unable to finish your sentence as Jinx pushes you out the window. You were wrong, the chances of getting killed might actually be higher than getting expelled.

While this was the first time Other You was getting pushed out of a window, this was fortunately—and sadly—not your first. Your instincts kick in and you're able to land on your feet, using the momentum to tuck and roll safely on the ground. All with the tome still clutched on one hand.

You're about to give Jinx a piece of your mind when she mouths catch me and you panic and free up your hands, just in time for her to land right into your arms. Sadly, however, strength doesn't carry over between universes as well as technique. Your knees buckle and you fall backwards. You barely have time to recover before Jinx is tucking the tome under her arm and pulling you up to your feet, already running away from the building.

You follow suit, quickly discovering that cardio was also not transferrable between timelines. Still, you keep running until your legs are burning and you see the dorms come into view, only stopping once you're both safely hidden at its side entrance.

You somehow beat Jinx to the door, your hands on your knees as your chest heaves. She comes to a stop right next to you. Planting a hand on your shoulder and using you for support.

"That was—"

"Fucking stupid."

She slaps your shoulder and laughs, commenting about how she likes this new, cussing, version of you. You take a second to compose yourself, huffing before standing to your full height, ready to give her a piece of your mind. Instead you stop short, your faces only a few inches apart. Thankfully, she seems just as surprised at the proximity, enough that she drops the infuriating grin on her face.

Her eyes flit to your lips, then to your eyes. A pointed look in hers. A challenge more than an invitation, really.

Your mind goes haywire.

There are many, many—actually so many—reasons why you should not, at all, kiss Jinx. Different timeline or not, you, specifically you, cannot do it. It would be the greatest betrayal to your people, your friends, everyone you know and love, your moral code, your promise to take down Silco's empire and clean the Undercity, Ekko, Heimerdinger and Jayce; have you mentioned your friends?

A tug at the front of your shirt, her biting her lip to stop a smile that reaches her eyes anyway, and your resolve begins to slip.

You can feel her breath on your lips.

"Stop thinking."

You will swear on your grave that it's the Other You that grabs her and closes the gap.

-----

Ninety-five

Timelines can have profound disparities from each other, but they could also have nearly miniscule, insignificant ones as well. This means that you could jump from one timeline where you were wearing a blue shirt, then a red one in the next, with everything else staying the same. Be a firelight in one, and next thing you know, you're an enforcer.

Sometimes, the big and small changes can mix things up. While they haven't been a huge inconvenience to you in the past—present, future?—they sure as hell were now.

Exhibit A: You're an enforcer.

Exhibit B: You're thrown into the mix on the day of the bridge explosion.

Exhibit C: Instead using a chomper to blow herself up, Jinx rigs the underside of the middle of the bridge with explosives.

At this point, ninety-five jumps in, you should really learn to be more vigilant when it comes to tackling unpredictable situations. Not that you can fully put yourself at fault, of course. You just wanted to make sure Ekko and his friends survived.

…And arrest Jinx so she didn't blow herself up. Then nothing else!

So why the hell am I lugging an unconscious Jinx into my apartment? You wonder as you set Jinx down on your bed. The panic and anxiety of the Other You understandably building up, seeing as she and Jinx haven't met yet. That and you're an enforcer harboring a wanted fugitive. And she killed Other You's friends, so the grief and anger are really making things confusing.

You roll Jinx onto her back, checking to see if she has any injuries. There's a deep cut on her side—courtesy of you while you were fighting—but nothing you couldn't stitch up yourself. Granted she doesn't wake up and shoot you, first.

Lumbering over to your bathroom where you kept your first aid kit, you flip the lights on. There's a semi-concerning pool of red on the front of your jacket, and your undershirt. You turn to the mirror, and spot what looks like a gash right under your breast. No big deal, it'll stop bleeding on its own. Must've been a sharp part of the bridge that nicked you as it collapsed, or maybe you cut yourself while fishing yourself and Jinx out of the harbor. Something I can fix later.

You grab a chair and settle on the side of your bed, taking out your suturing kit and disinfecting your hands. This shouldn't take too long, but that was never the problem. The problem was what would happen after Jinx wakes up.

You initially thought of just taking her to her hideout, but you ran the risk of running into Silco's people. While you could've just left at the docks—well, you don't really have a reason to not have left her at the docks, now do you?

You shake the thought out of your mind and get to work on closing the cut. It wasn't bleeding as much, but leaving it alone could get it infected, plus it would take forever to close.

Not that I care. You futilely tell yourself. As if saving her from dying, carrying her back to your home, and stitching up her wounds were normal activities between an enforcer and a fugitive—a fugitive of your creation!—on any given day. You weren't even originally planning on stopping her from dying. You know she comes back, pumped full of shimmer and allegedly a thousand times faster. Your only concern was getting Ekko to safety, but then one thing led to another, and you had your gun pointed at her as you were telling her she was under arrest. Everything should have worked out fine, if only the bridge didn't blow up.

Once her cut's been stitched up, and you change the bandage on an injury on her leg. You do a once over to check if she has any other life-threatening ailments. Once you deem that there are none, you decide change into a clean set of clothing. After slapping on a bandage over your cut—also bleeding a lot less—and putting on a sweater, your eye catches the mark the wild rune left on your forearm. You're reminded about another discovery you made: The mark was slowly fading.

You hypothesize that it had something to do with the number of times you were jumping through timelines. Did that make it a timer? Or was it a limited number of lives that was counting down to zero? And what does that mean when it runs out? Will you be stuck in that timeline forever? Or will it return you back home?

Learning about Hex Tech and runes was proving to be difficult jumping around to different timelines every few days. You'd have to pick up right where you left off every jump, and even then your access to resources was limited depending on the timeline. Not that you were making any progress, anyway. You were convinced that you needed to be a proper magic user before you could make sense of what you were learning.

You put your first aid kit away and head back into your room. It's not without difficulty, as you feel the adrenaline rush you had back at the bridge slowly ebb away; you're surprised it even lasted this long in the first place. But now you needed to rest a hand against your dresser for support, a feeling of lightheadedness starting to take over. Staying steady was actually becoming a bit difficult.

The hand you're using for support shifts to the side, as you struggle with your balance, and tips over a small container. The familiar rattling of pills catches your attention. You pick up the bottle and rattle it again before reading the label. A nagging feeling at the back of your mind is telling you that you've forgotten about something.

...Iron supplements. It read.

Uh oh.

"Fuck"

You suddenly feel like the best course of action is to close your eyes for a bit and sit on the floor to collect yourself, as you vaguely register the pill bottle clattering onto the ground.

Five seconds. That's all you need and you'll be back in tip top shape.

One.

Two.

Three.

A weight on your stomach, pushing out all the air you're trying to breathe in.

Four--

Click.

Your eyes open blearily, barely registering the barrel of a gun right in front of your eyes. Your gun, in fact. Panic and dread start to fill your senses, and for the first time since you hopped into this plane of existence, you agree with Other You's

feelings. If this was any of the preceding timelines, you would've been confident that Jinx wouldn't harm a hair on your head.

But not in this one.

You look past your gun and spot blue eyes staring at you. Some of the panic you feel dwindle when you see the curious look in her eyes—you can read her like a book at this point—and the slack of her grip on the gun. At least she isn't planning on shooting you immediately.

"Hello." You croak out, your voice hoarse from sleep. Oh no, were you a mouth breather in this timeline too?

Her hold on the gun straightens; your attention is immediately rapt and trained only on her. "Silco got you in his pocket, or something?"

You hesitantly swallow. Saying yes to buy yourself time was certainly one way to do it, but on the off chance that this was a test, that was a one way ticket to getting a bullet in your cranium.

"No."

The tip of the gun leaves your vision for a second, but you're spared no relief when you feel it jammed under your jaw. Wrong answer, then.

She comes into full view, sitting on your stomach—so that's why you couldn't breathe—boots on either side of your chest. "So what, you some kind of sicko? Saving poor 'ol me, patching me up? Or are you one of those delusional Pilties that think you can save some misunderstood girl from the Undercity?" Her head tilts to the side, a lilt in her voice as she says the last part.

"No." You struggle to get the next words out. "I swear." Your hand ball into fists as she jams the gun in deeper. Wait a second, my hands are free. I can take her do—no. No. I am not going to escalate the situation.

An oversight, or a challenge?

"You had a clear shot at me, you didn't shoot. I try to blow you up, you fish me out of the harbor and stitch up my wounds." Your eyes flit to her bandaged side She leans her face closer to yours. "Why?"

Well you see, I think we're kind of made for each other. You're tempted to say, but you doubt she's in any state to believe you. In any case, you'll actually come across as some sicko. Not that Other You would have shot her, either. You could feel the hesitation on her end when you had the gun trained on Jinx. If Marcus hadn't pulled his gun on Kiramman, she might have, but she thankfully had some sense of justice, and seeing the sheriff's true colors come out was enough to view everything with more scrutiny.

You have an inkling feeling that Other You would still end in the situation you're currently in. One way or another.

"I…I don't kno—"

"Liar!" The butt of your pistol connects with your temple, and you're nearly knocked out again. The room spins, and you're barely able to focus on Jinx again before her nails are digging into the skin on your cheeks, forcing you to face her. There's frustration written all over her face, but you know that she's just trying to make sense of the situation, if her shaking hand is any indication. Your fault, really, Other You is confused as hell, too.

She moves a foot back, and shifts so that her knee is carrying her weight—you're half thankful that it's not on your stomach anymore—as she leans forward. Her face closer now.

Your eyes focus back on hers. A mix of emotions swimming on those pools of blue; frustration, hostility, anger. But you also see panic, vulnerability, regret, and confusion. Her grip on you face loosens marginally. And then it hits you.

She didn't want to hurt you.

One thing constant in every timeline that you've been to, is the almost magnetic pull you felt towards her; the need to always have her in near proximity, and the sense of calm that would come over you if she was. And try as you might, you couldn't ignore the wave of affection that you would feel while you were with her.

Is it possible she feels this as well?

It's a risky thing to test, especially since you didn't know what would happen to you if Other You died. But it is kind of your own doing at this point.

You say nothing, hoping that she'll fill in the silence.

Her hand continues to shake, but you can tell that her anger is already wavering. You almost miss her asking you why again, she probably meant to keep it to herself.

"I don't want to hurt you either."

Risky. But you don't have a lot of options left.

She lets out a breath at your words, the gun retracts.

"Who are you?" Her voice is quiet, unsure.

Your soulmate, apparently. "Nobody." You answer semi-honestly. You were, technically, she hasn't had the chance to know you in this timeline yet.

She shakes her head and looks away. "No you're not." The softness of her tone catches you off guard. Her hand moving away from your cheek to clutch the collar of your sweater, doubly so. "You…you're familiar."

"Like we already know each other." Her eyes meet yours again, the surprise in them evident. She said those same words to you in a few past timelines. You always thought they were just little variations in those particular versions of her, but now…this just supports your hypothesis that she also cycles through the same sensations you do.

Your eye catches a faint streak of light manages to slip through your closed curtains, providing a miniscule amount of light into your dark room. "It's morning." You muse out loud, looking back at the still speechless girl on top of you. "Enforcers are going to be everywhere. You need to get out of here."

Her sense of urgency is seemingly stirred by your words, and she pulls you up along with her. Confusion still litters her features, you hope the smile you offer her is enough for comfort.

"Can you walk okay?" her mouth opens and closes a few times, still at a loss for words. You decide to push your luck, slowly reaching a hand over to touch her free arm. "Jinx."

Her brows furrow. The question of your knowledge of her name accusingly reflected in her eyes.

"I heard Kiramman say it, at the bridge." Thank goodness she actually did. Otherwise, this would've been very confusing for Other You in the future.

"I—" She starts. "I have to go."

You nod. "There's a fire escape out the bathroom window. Hold on—" You go to your dresser and pull out a hooded coat, moving to drape it over her, only to stop short when her shoulder tenses. Her eyes are trained on you, a slight air of hostility between them. You don't push to put on the coat, but you don't lower your arm either; waiting for her make the decision for you.

Her eyes flit around the room, seemingly trying to find her words around your home. She lets out a sigh, her shoulders drooping slightly. You take this as a positive sign, and gently place the coat over her shoulders. You see her hand tense around your gun, not in a threatening way, instinctively.

You slowly back away from her to give her space. She looks away from you as she slips her free hand into one of the sleeves, before grabbing the gun and slipper her other arm into the remaining sleeve. It's a little big on her, but the size and the addition of the hood is enough to hide anything that could immediately identify her.

There's uncertainty in her eyes when she looks back at you; she hesitantly lifts the hand holding the gun, the barrel clutched in her hand. "This is yours."

You shake your head. "As much as I hate to say this, you might need it."

She mutters an oh before holstering the gun in her hip. You gesture to an open door and lead her into the bathroom, pulling the window open and checking if there was anyone in the alley below. The sun was slowly but surely rising, it's rays already illuminating the dim streets in the main road.

"Coast is clear, stick to the alleys and you should be fine." You stand aside and let her climb out, her hand resting on the windowsill. The look she gives you tells you that she's trying to find an ounce of deception in your features. But she won't find any, not when it concerns her, not ever.

"I'll…I'll get you your gun back."

"Don't worry about it." You shrug. "I'll find you."

You see the ghost of a smile on her lips as she turns around and climbs down the ladder, disappearing into an adjacent alleyway.

"I always seem to find you." You mutter to yourself.

-----

One Hundred Sixty-Eight

The familiar smell of grease and burnt metal fills your nose as you enter your old workshop. Jayce had been kind enough to hand you the keys after you had asked if you could see the old place. Don't go too crazy he said. You rolled your eyes at his comment, of course. It wasn't as if you were going to steal anything as a souvenir; maybe draw something inappropriate on a whiteboard, sure. But as you drew closer to the lab, you spotted Jinx's car, and well, now you were going there for two reasons. You should have just turned around and not indulged Other You's—not yours!—thoughts. The length of time you spent in each timeline was getting longer on average, and you had to make the best of it while you could, especially with the mark slowly fading with each pass.

You walk towards the wall of the shared space, everything was still as messy as you—Other You—remembered. Diagrams and papers still littered table tops, probably permanent coffee stains on tables. But the hanging photos were new.

The first one was of Viktor and Jayce when they first started working on Hextech, just two young adults that barely knew what they were doing. The second one was of you three right after they had officially hired you. The third one was Jayce, Viktor, Ekko, and Jinx. Your eyes stray back to the middle photo, the one with you in it. The moment felt like lifetimes ago.

It's strange, looking at the person cheekily smiling back at you, already older than you in your original timeline. This body felt terribly tired, like the Other You here went through the ringer trying to get here.

The sound of a chair screeching and shuffling around one of the rooms grabs your attention. Your eyebrows furrow. Jayce didn't say anything about someone else being here, especially nearing midnight. You cautiously make your way to the room, trying not to make too much noise in case they'll think you're an intruder. The door is ajar, letting light seep through the darker main floor. There's a pull in your chest again, and you're reminded of your second objective here. Other You had wanted to speak to Jinx earlier, but couldn't because there was a line of other people that wanted your attention. By the time you broke free from the others, Jinx had already left.

A familiar warmth fills your chest. It looked like she had gone straight back to work after the party, still in her dress, heels discarded on the side, twirling a pencil as she looked over notes. Her headphones were on, and the couch she was lounging on was turned away from the door, so you doubt she'd hear or see you moving around.

You open the door fully and lean against the frame, deciding to wait until she notices you standing there. Not like you'd go unnoticed long, she probably felt the tugging too.

It's not even a minute before she stops what she's doing and turns around. There's a split second where surprise crosses her features, but she quickly recovers, raising an eyebrow at you instead.

"Come crawling back to the slums have we?" She says as she takes off her headphones and leaves it at her neck. She wears her hair down nowadays. It's also shorter here, only reaching the middle of her back. It's refreshing to see, and you find yourself brushing off the question of whether or not the older Jinx in your timeline would cut her hair the same one day.

"Something like that."

She scoffs, turning back to look at her work. Her words are friendly, but there's tension in the air. You're not sure if you should move into the room, or leave.

"Don't stand there like a creep, come sit." She pats the space next to her. There's no edge to her words either, so maybe the tension is coming from you. You're aware that there's a significant amount of history between her and Other You, but you're not sure whether this is the time or place to be settling past issues. What you do know, is that you shouldn't wait any longer before sitting down next to her.

There's a metal box in the coffee table in front of you, next to where Jinx has propped up her legs. "It's a prototype for a gemstone case." She says before you can ask. She takes the small box and twirls it in her hand, small prongs are protruding on the inside. "The goal is to make sure the gemstones only work if they're in these. So we can start using them for the more dangerous jobs around here; stop people from stealing them, since you have to break the case to get the stone."

You take the box when she offers it, testing the weight of it in your hands. "Did you go straight here after the party?"

"Not much to do there for me." She shrugs. "I'd rather work on this. Besides, you went here after the party, too."

"Fair point." You set the case back down on the table, and watch Jinx place it on a small stand to the side. "You work until midnight often?"

The corners of her lips quirk into a smile. "Talis is drowning in debt with the amount of overtime he has to pay me." You're about to laugh along with her, till you remember Jayce's comment earlier. Jayce you little—

She nudges you with her shoulder. "You're thinking again, that can't be good."

"Jayce."

"What about him?"

"Some dumb comment he said earlier when he gave me the keys to here."

"Oh?" A mischievous look in her eyes. "What did my boss say, exactly?" You grimace. This isn't fair, she fully knows Jayce said something completely out of pocket.

"Nothing."

"Bull. Tell me so I can take it out of context and bully him into giving me a raise." At this comment you actually laugh. You don't doubt that Jinx has probably done that at least once already. Jayce's tendency to say things without thinking is the worst thing to have when working with someone like Jinx.

"Tell me." She nudges you again, this time with a little more force. "Or else."

"Or else what?"

"I'll kick your ass." Just like that, the tension in the air lifts. You remember the times this version of yourself was at odds with Jinx, only to make up after spending a few minutes together. It's terrifyingly so easy, how fast she can disarm you—literally and figuratively—like it's nothing. How she beckons you over and you oblige with desperate speed. But Other You isn't as experienced in resisting Jinx's charms—ie your souls being tied together, apparently—so you still have the audacity to push her buttons.

"Aren't you too old to be threatening to kick people's asses?" She leans back, mouth agape, you snort at her expression, but the entertainment is short lived as a throw pillow connects with your face. You huff, genuinely surprised that she'd hit you. She throws her head back and barks out a laugh at your expression.

"Can't believe you're still a brat at thirty."

"Watch it, buster. You're the same age as me."

"You know what they say about growing up being a choice." You duck this time when she swings, grabbing the throw pillow next to you and decking her in the face with it. For a second you think that you hit her too hard—and these throw pillows were notorious for being harder than regular pillows—but the second you drop the one in your hand, she tackles you.

You're momentarily disoriented as your back lands on the seat. Jinx hits you a few more times, before she pins you down with the pillow, legs on either side of your waist, chest heaving. You sink further into the couch as she leans in close.

"Take that back."

The logical side of you knows that you should just say sorry, but the prideful side of you refuses to relent. "Which part? Growing up being a choice, or you being a bra—" The pillow thuds against your face. "Ow! Hey! Those things hurt."

You sit up to grab her wrists before she can land another blow. She pushes you in response, getting herself pulled down with you in the process. You lean a bit to side to stop your heads from hitting each other, Jinx pressing flush against you. The last thing Jayce needed was one of his employees getting a concussion because of a pillow fight. Though, you could use that as an excuse to get rid of the old throw pillows, but that would come with the price humiliation for you and Jinx. Not to mention relentless teasing from your other friends.

You shake your head at the train of thought. You were thinking too much about this, you really should have just turned around earlier.

The sound of her laughter brings you out of your musings. The way her chest rumbled with each breath. She rests her head in the crook of your neck, it doesn't even occur to you that you've let go of her hands, instead moving your them to her back and keeping her close—so she doesn't roll off and hurt herself, of course.

You yourself were out of breath, and probably flushed—because you were getting older and tire easy, nothing else!—as you felt yourself laughing with her.

When she lifts her head to look at you, she makes sure that she's still close enough that her lips brush against your jaw. The both of you know it's a proven and effective way for your mind to go blank, for you to focus solely on her. You keep telling yourself you be able to resist it, eventually. You never do.

The logical part of your brain once again reminds you that it's not a good idea to be this close, to prolong the time you two are in close proximity to each other. That you need to prioritize finding a way home, that there are people that depend on you and that this is irresponsible behavior. But for some reason, you find yourself not wanting to listen for once.

Maybe it's just because your souls might be tied to each other. Maybe it's because you spent the last one hundred sixty-seven timelines watching other versions of yourself being in love or falling in love with her. Maybe it's because of the Other You here, and her relationship with this Jinx. The both of you are older in this timeline, you've known each other longer, know each other better, seen each other grow together and apart, only to find your way back to her, over and over again.

It's not just that, though.

It's the softness in her eyes whenever she looks at you, the way she brushes your hair out of your face. It's every time she checks on you if she senses that you're not alright. It's her knowing what you want to say before you say anything. How immersed she gets in her work, drowning out the rest of the world while she works on a project. Every morning that you've had to wake up next to her, watching her sleep peacefully. It's her temper, and how passionate she gets when arguing over something. It's finding her doodles and notes that she's left for you every single timeline. It's the urge to find her when you end up in a timeline where she isn't immediately by your side.

It's her, all one hundred sixty-eight versions of her, and every version after. Honestly, how many variations of yourself do you have to watch love this girl before you finally admit it to yourself?

Too many.

"Got something to say to me?" The corner of her eyes crinkle as she smirks at you.

It's how she knows you.

"I love you." You breathe out. She doesn't try to hide her surprise this time, or isn't able to. She blinks a few times, and you smile at the fact that it's her mind going haywire for once.

You take advantage of her being momentarily stunned, sitting up, keeping your hold on her so she actually doesn't fall over. She instinctively grabs onto your shoulders for support.

"It's getting late." Her eyebrows furrow at your words.

"You just told me you love me, and now you're dipping?"

"I mean…You haven't answered, and I'm getting sleepy. Plus, the bed at the hotel I got is really ni—"

She doesn't let you finish as she yanks you into a kiss. You happily oblige, sighing and pulling her closer. Sadly, it doesn't last long as she breaks the kiss with a start, pushing your shoulders back when you try to chase after her lips.

"You really need to learn when to shut up sometimes." You take the hint and stay quiet, trying to bite back the smile already forming on your face. She rolls her eyes at your expression, having trouble hiding her own smile.

She doesn't need to say it back, not really. You understand that she hasn't seen Other You in a long time, and although the latter felt the same, your confession was more of a selfish move for yourself, really.

You can wait. As long as she wants, as long as she needs.

Her eyes flit back to your lips, before returning to your eyes. The mischievous glint returning.

"What's this about your hotel room having a nice bed?"

---

Two Hundred Fourteen

Meetings at the Firelight hideout weren't unusual.

In fact, a lot of your meetings with the group were often held here. Especially once Jinx had found out where you lived. So when you received a message from Ekko asking you to head over there because they had gotten a tip about a shipment of Shimmer, there were no alarm bells ringing in your head. A rookie mistake on your part, really.

To be completely fair, you had taken advantage of the two months you were here. You've never stayed anywhere over ten days, and the fact that you still had some semblance of the mark on your forearm meant that you were still going to get pulled into a different timeline at some point. But in the meantime, you started tinkering with equipment you could use to build your own Hex gate. The only thing missing was a gemstone.

Also in order to be completely fair. You were busy with Jinx, who you were slowly trying to convince to leave Silco's employ entirely. Which was a complicated thing to tackle, because you were an independent contractor that often worked with the Firelights. This meant that when she started showing up to your home unannounced, you had to switch up your dead drops and meet up points with the group, if only to keep the peace while maintaining your most consistent client.

And now you're in this predicament.

Surrounded by Firelights, plus Vi and Caitlyn.

You had hoped, foolishly, that this was as similar to your timeline as it was gonna get, at least with the limited amount of jumps you probably had left. You were lucky enough that Other You here and Jinx had met previously, and already kickstarted the inevitable chain of events that would have brought them together. You thought you had time before Vi and Jinx would meet, which was due in a few days from now.

You thought a lot of things, but at the end of the day, that was all they were. Two Hundred timelines in, and you still had trouble dealing with unpredictable situations.

"Piltover is one bad day away from sending enforcers to find Jinx."

"Damn, I hope they find her, then." Ekko groans, clearly not in the mood for the clueless act. Caitlyn steps forward a bit too abruptly, you draw your gun, everybody draws their weapons. Caitlyn glares at you, daring you to make the first move. You're a good shot yourself, but you know from past experience that there was no way you'd beat her in a gunfight.

"Hey—hey! Easy!" Vi gets between all of you, arms up, trying to lessen the tension. Ekko nods at his people—your people—and they lower their weapons. You shake your head for a second, before lowering yours. Other You was being protective and reckless, you had to control yourself. The last thing you want to do is hurt your people.

Caitlyn keeps her rifle trained on you, you maintain your glare towards her until she puts her gun down. "This is pointless." She looks towards Vi. "I say arrest her, and lure Jinx out."

"Can't arrest me if you're out of a job." Caitlyn narrows her eyes at your response. Fuck, wasn't supposed to know that.

"What, you think I don't have eyes and ears topside?" You're fairly sure that she'll buy your bluff, purely because there's no other explanation for you to know that. Thankfully Vi calls for everyone's attention.

"Look, we won't get anywhere arguing." She looks over to you, a silent plea in her eyes. You feel terrible about all of this, of course. You know she's just trying to find her sister after years of being locked up unfairly, in Stillwater no less!

"I know you care about her, and that you're the reason she's been quiet the last few months." It takes a bit of effort to keep your face neutral, your mind already working to figure out just how exactly they knew about you and Jinx. Had you become careless these past few months? Was she careless?

She moves a bit closer to you, arms in a placating gesture. "But if she doesn't return the gemstone, or worse, Silco gets his grimy hands on it, then Piltover will flood the streets with enforcers, and it'll be another civil war."

You wish you could tell them that Piltover wouldn't be able to handle the Undercity now, not with shimmer already being weaponized.

"I don't know where she is." You answer truthfully. As close as you two were these last couple of months, you didn't make it a point to know her whereabouts at every single hour of the day.

Caitlyn interjects. "Six enforcers are dead because of her, even more people wounded. Are you really going to protect someone who was willing to kill so many people in cold blood?" She makes a move to grab you, but Vi holds her back. Your jaw clenches. You thought you had swayed her enough that she wouldn't have gone through with the Progress Day attack.

Vi looks over to Ekko, who has mercifully stayed quiet. There's a disappointed look on his face, either for your involvement with Jinx, or your indirect betrayal on the Firelights, you're not sure. He nods over to the other FIrelights, who all lunge at you.

You try to fight back, easily sidestepping to avoid the first person to lunge, then using their momentum to launch them into the next person. A third person tries to hit you with their club, and you narrowly duck under their swing, springing to push them off their feet, and make your way to the door. On any other day, this would've been a fun sparring session, but sadly it wasn't any other day. And this was quickly becoming a one-on-seven fight.

Ekko grabs you from behind and bear hugs you. You feel the air being pushed out of your lungs as you struggle out of his grip. You drop to your knees, using his temporary loss of balance as leverage, and swing your body forward, he stumbles enough that his grip loosens, and you throw the rest of him over your shoulders. You turn around to make your way to the door again, before a fist connects right on your jaw. That's right, Vi is here, too

You quickly fall to your knees, the room is already spinning. you pitifully try to maintain your balance while on all fours, hanging onto a nearby chair for support. Two people grab you by the arms and begin to drag you away, you try to pull your arms free, but are met with a kick to the gut. You relent, letting them drag you into a dark room.

Their version of a holding cell, tying you down and taking your holsters and your coat. You're still a bit disoriented, but you're lucid enough to recognize Ekko's shadow when he approaches you.

"I'm sorry it has to come to this," He starts. "But if Silco gets his hands on Hextech, the Undercity will lose a lot more people. Good people."

You feel your chest ache at his words. You've been fighting for the Undercity your entire life, that's the last thing you want. But never in a million lifetimes would you betray Jinx. "You have to let me find her, Ekko." You plead.

"I can't trust your judgment on this."

"Try." He purses his lips, for a second you think he'll let you go. You weren't as close her as you were in your timeline, but you hope that your reliability in this one is enough to convince him.

He sighs, and the spark of hope you have is snuffed out. "This is for the best." He stands up and leaves the room, two guards replacing him.

Normally, you would be flattered. Two people guarding you even though you were already unarmed, and it doesn't even look like they're changing shifts soon. They don't take your eyes off of you either, so you pass the time counting the seconds. They probably already left to go find Jinx, which meant you had to give them at least a half hour head start before you could try to escape.

The minutes pass by quickly, and once you're nearing the thirty minute mark, you start prepping your escape plan.

They took away your coat and your holster with your weapons, but they didn't take away your belt. Which was a good thing because you actually needed it to pull your baggy pants up, but also because you had jammed a blade in between the leather. A knife was also welded into the buckle, built to quick release with the push of a button.

You carefully start to pry the blade out of the leather, being mindful not to cut yourself. You successfully get your knife out, quietly cutting your hands free. your next order of business was your feet. You'd have to time it with taking out both guards, who were both about six steps away from you. If you were lucky, you'd be fast enough to cut your feet loose and take them down at the same time.

You hedge your bets on yourself, and quickly lunge forward, cutting your feet loose in one swift motion. Both guards stand up, and you toss your knife just close enough to one of them that they freeze. You grab your other knife from your buckle, meeting the one still running towards you halfway. You slide downwards, jamming the butt of the knife into his knee, then following up by clocking him in the jaw with it as soon as he falls down. The one that was momentarily stunned launches himself at you, but you expertly roll out of the way and jump from behind him, putting him in a headlock. You tighten your hold, hoping to knock him out quickly. He struggles for a few moments, before his arms go limp, and you let him fall to the floor.

"Not bad." You say to yourself, impressed. You take the keys off of them and their mask, hoping it'll help you sneak out. Thankfully, you find that your stuff is just in the next room, and you hastily put your gear back on before sneaking out to find Jinx.

She wasn't in any of her usual haunts, or any of your haunts for that matter. You realized halfway through your search that she was avoiding you as well. It made sense; you had gotten her to stop with the over the top antics for Silco, and you were sure she knew that you didn't want her to continue working for him anymore. So this… whatever this was, you were probably not supposed to find out. Unfortunately for her, you're keenly aware of at least some of the events about to transpire. Which meant you didn't have a lot of time left; maybe the timeline of events was sped up somehow? The butterfly effect tended to go crazy, who knows what got kicked into gear when you showed up here?

You're halfway to giving up and going straight to Silco when you catch sight of blue smoke come off of one of the taller buildings in The Lanes. A flare?

"She told me that if I lit this up, she'd find me."

"Anywhere?"

"Anywhere. She promised."

Your feet are already kicking the ground before you even register it.

She had to have heard about Vi being back. How the hell did you forget? The most important thing you didn't take into consideration before running around the Undercity like a headless chicken. Of course she would find out. If they had met Ekko this soon, that would've meant that this timeline had an entirely different flow from yours.

So much for considering variations in the timelines.

The entrance to the old building is bolted shut, so you start climb up pipes and rooftops, anything to get there before the others did. Your arms were burning, but you sure as hell preferred that than having to fend off Vi and the others if they got there first. From the last time this happened, Jinx did not have the best reaction.

You're barely able to shout her name once you get half onto the roof, but you push yourself up and run towards her, swatting the flare out of her hands. Her shock lasts only a second before she rams you in the stomach with Pow-pow. It only occurs to you now that you're still wearing a firelight mask.

"It's me, it's me!" She recognizes your voice before you can even take off the mask. Her hostility quickly dissipates, before being replaces with hesitation.

"I—What are you doing here?" Her tone is accusatory, but it's only half meant. You know she's nervous because she thinks you haven't heard about the Progress Day explosion. You pull her into a hug, hoping to provide some comfort, if any, to make sure she doesn't have a panic attack.

"I'll explain later, okay?" You say as you pull back, cupping her cheeks. "We need to get out of here."

There's a smidgen of doubt at the back of your mind that she'll go with you, but thankfully, she nods as you lead her off of the roof.

The both of you head to her hideout. Not the safest place to go to, but your house was definitely the worse option. You're not even there for a minute before you start questioning her.

"Did Silco ask you to do this?" You say as you set down Pow-Pow on a table. She looks away from you, the shame on her face evident. Your gaze softens at the sight, and you remind yourself that this is Silco's fault, not hers.

"Hey," You walk over to her and gently turn her chin to look at you. "You don't have to go through with what he has planned, alright? I'll return the gemstone, Tell them I found it rolling around in an alleyway."

Fear flashes across her features. "I can't." She pushes herself away from you. "I need to finish what he asked me to do. Then we can…"

You're tempted to reach out a hand and hold her, but you stop yourself short, afraid that you'll scare her away. "What is he asking you to do? I'll do it, just…don't go back to doing the dirty work."

She smiles at you sadly. "He wants me to build something with it." Her launcher.

"Jinx." There's a sudden urgency in your voice that catches her off guard. She doesn't know what'll happen if she makes it, but you do. You know who dies, and what happens because of it.

It's instant, how she recognizes what you want to say, just by looking at you. She walks back over to you and pulls you close, until your foreheads are touching. "It'll be okay."

There's a sincerity in her eyes that nearly convinces you. If you hadn't brought with you the knowledge from your own timeline. Your chest aches for her, how sure she is that things will be fine. "We can just drop this, Jinx." You say softly. She shakes her head.

"No. I can't."

"Why not?" There's a storm brewing behind her eyes. You know she doesn't want to do this. Maybe if you just—

"You just have to trust me."

"I do trust you." You pull away from her, ignoring the instant guilt you feel when you see the hurt flash across her face. You run a hand through your hair in frustration, your hand rubbing the side of your brow. "It's Silco I don't trust! We can just toss the stone into the harbor and call it quits—"

"I told you, I can't!"

"Why?!"

"Because I can't risk it!" Tears prickle at the corners of her eyes. It takes you a few seconds, silence stretching between the both of you, before it dawns on you.

She was doing this for you.

You shake your head. "No. You are not going to do something you don't want to because of me."

She smiles at you sadly. She wasn't going to budge.

A lightheadedness starts to come over you, and you grab onto the desk for support. All of those timeline you had to go through, only for you to cause one to go through the same path yours did. No, you can't let it happen here. There has to be some way to stop all of this.

A pair of arms grab onto yours, grounding you. "Easy there, jelly legs."

You look up at concerned blue eyes, and a thought occurs to you.

"What if we leave?"

She blinks, taken aback by your question. "What?"

"Leave. Start over. Away from the undercity, from Piltover, everything."

"We can't just leave." She tries to look away from you, but you lean towards her.

"What's stopping us? I can get us an airship. Didn't you say you always wanted to ride one of those things?" For a second, you see hope in her eyes. You want to think that she's imagining a simpler life with you—Other You, you quickly remind yourself—away from everything that's ever caused the both of you pain.

And then It's gone, and she backs away from you. "You should go." She turns away from you, idly looking at her notes.

Anything she wants, anything she needs. Your jaw clenches, but you're dead set on this solution. It's the only way to keep everyone alive in this.

"Tomorrow, at the docks. I'll have an airship ready."

Tomorrow couldn't come sooner.

It could, actually. Because the time between you leaving Jinx's hideout and waiting on your newly acquired airship seemed to have passed in the blink of an eye. And now you were pacing around the outside, waiting for her to show up.

You shouldn't be this nervous, you know she'll show up. It's nearly guaranteed that she'll show up, nothing's stronger than the bond between the two of you. There's a slight pang of guilt as you consider that you took advantage of this, eliminating her choice in the matter entirely. But it'll be fine, this was the best way to avoid a war.

It isn't long before she shows up. She always does, but you feel the weight of the world lift off of your shoulders anyway. You waste no time running towards her and enveloping her in a hug. She holds you just as tight. You know how much she's leaving behind by agreeing to this, her whole life, her memories of her family, everything.

"We'll be okay." She whispers into your ear. You will be forever thankful for how well she can read you.

You pull away just far enough so you can plant a kiss on her forehead. "As much as I want hold you like this." You start. "You'd best get on the ship so I can untie it."

She chuckles a bit before pulling away—not before placing a chaste kiss on your lips—and disappears through the door. You move to hurriedly untie the cleats for the ship.

This is it. You're almost out.

"Stop!"

Almost out.

You whip around and see Ekko, along with some of your Firelight friends. You pull out your gun, absolutely loathing the possibility of having to use it on your own people. The thought of them harming Jinx does little to quell your inner turmoil.

"Just let us go, Ekko." You plead, pride thrown aside. "You and I both know it was Silco who put her up to it."

He shakes his head. "We can't do that. Not when Piltover is threatening to knock down our doors."

"So you're giving up one of your own?!"

"You think I don't understand what that means?" He steps closer to you. "Everything I've done was to help our own. Do you have any idea what it's like having to give up someone you grew up with, to save hundreds more?!"

"So don't give her up, let us leave!"

"She killed half a dozen people—"

"She had no choice!"

"Everyone has a choice!"

"You would've blown up a hundred enforcers if one of them threatened someone you loved!"

"It doesn't change what she did!"

"She only did it because Silco forced her to! Why hell aren't you going after him?" You lift your gun and point it at Ekko, who doesn't back down. All of your Firelight friends lift their own weapons, and you notice some of them gliding around in their hoverboards.

You always wondered what would happen if you died in a timeline.

Maybe it was time to test it out.

"Don't do this." There's hesitation in Ekko's eyes, but the both of you know that there's only one way left for this to end.

His eyes pull away from yours, moving to look at something just behind you.

You hear her call out your name, and you turn, oblige, anything for her.

She smiles at you, The softness in her eyes only reserved for you.

"I love you."

Dread seeps into your bones. There's no reason for her to say it with such finality. You know she loves you, she always does, she always will. You say it back just so she knows that you'll love her in every one, too.

"Take care of Vi for me, okay?" You nod dumbly and she turns around, walking back towards the airship.

The sound of a gunshot echoes across the docks, you think it's you who's been hit, the way the air is knocked out of your lungs, the way your ears start ringing, and everything goes numb.

"It's okay, you're okay, I've got you."

But it isn't you who falls limp onto the floor. It isn't your gun that clatters to the ground. It isn't you who's no longer breathing—not in this timeline.

“I was just starting to find you attractive.”

You stumble towards her, all but falling to your knees.

"Stop thinking."

Tears start to blur your vision as you try to reach for her hand.

"It's like we already know each other."

Your breath catches in your throat, you gently pry the Hextech gemstone from her fingers.

"I love you."

A sob escapes your lips. You can't let anyone see her like this.

"We'll be okay."

Your hands shake as you pull off your coat, draping it over her like a blanket.

You don't hear Ekko tell the Firelights to stand down. You don't hear him tell the Firelights to swear to silence.

You found Jinx before she could escape. You were the one who shot her. That was what they were going to tell everyone.

And you—you sit there, holding her hand, as everything else around you falls apart.

-----

Two hundred fifteen

"You need a top up for that, love?"

"No—" A shaky breath escapes your lips. "No, thank you."

How cruel must the gods be,

"Okay, you need anything else?"

To drag you through hell, then bring you back to the start?

"Love? You alright?"

The tears register a bit late, and you quickly wipe your eyes, meeting the concerned gaze of the man behind the bar.

Vander.

"Allergies." You blurt out. "They get pretty bad this time of year."

An eyebrow is raised, clearly doubting your poor excuse. You place your hands on your lap, safely out of his view, just so he doesn't see how much they're shaking.

"That so?"

You let out a nervous chuckle. It's taking everything you've got not to randomly break down at The Last Drop in the middle of the day.

"Yeah, yeah. I uh—I think I'll go blow my nose outside, actually."

"Hold on now—"

Whatever Vander says falls on deaf ears as you slide out of your chair, heading for the side door.

A wave of nausea starts blankets over you as you reach for the door and quickly step outside. You try to take a steadying breath, but there's a painful tightness in your chest, and all you can manage are a few stuttered gasps. Your vision starts to swim, legs collapsing from underneath you—the image of her blood spraying in the air replays in your mind—and you lean against the wall for support. Try as you might, a choked sob forces its way out of you. You clamp your hand over your mouth to keep your cries quiet, as your shoulders violently shake.

She died. Because of me. Because I was brash and reckless.

I shouldn't have tried to run.

I should have waited for things to die down.

I fucked up.

If I hadn't interfered, she would still be alive.

It's my fault.

"We'll be okay."

Your fist connects with the wall. The blooming pain in your knuckles provide a welcome distraction from your thoughts. So you punch the wall again, then again, and again, until red starts to coat the once grey cement. Anything to block out the image of her dying. Anything so you don't see her lifeless body when you close your eyes.

You only stop when you can no longer close your hand into a fist.

You hear the door open behind you, someone stepping out to puking on the side. Poor sap.

There's no way to make any coherent conversation with whoever this drunk person is. So instead, you gingerly cover your injured hand with the uninjured one, and push yourself off the ground.

You stiffen when you see who's throwing up in the corner.

Ekko.

What you'd do just so you could speak to him again. You miss your home, your friends, your people, your tree. Hell, even the grimy smell of the tunnels headed there.

When he's done heaving his guts out, he turns around and flops onto the floor, looking up when he notices you, and you lock eyes.

There's a disoriented look in his eyes, one you're extremely familiar with.

The door swings open again.

"One can't go shouting from the rooftops about being thrust into parallel dimensions without—Oh!" Heimerdinger shuts his mouth when he catches sight of you. He tucks the book he was about to hand Ekko under his armpit. "Hello there miss!" He chuckles nervously. "Quite a day we're having, isn't it?"

No.

No way.

"Ekko? Professor?"

It's Heimerdinger who recovers first. "Oh how wonderful!" He exclaims as recognition flashes in his eyes. "It seems the anomaly which dislodged us from our proverbial reality, also scattered us throughout time!" He throws his hands up, dropping Ekko's book to the ground. "But we're all here now, so everything is fine."

Ekko lets out a sigh of relief, before standing up and dusting himself off. "Man, I thought I was going crazy." Heimerdinger shuts the door again and begins explaining what happened to him while he was in this timeline.

Their conversation barely registers with you; tears once again well in your eyes. You walk forward, barely trying to contain the sob that comes out of your mouth as grab Ekko and pull him into a hug. You don't even try to stop yourself from shaking while you're crying into his shoulder.

The Firelights were a tightknit group, but you were always the less emotional, sometimes cynical one. So Ekko is understandably surprised and concerned when you're clutching onto him for dear life and bawling your eyes out. He holds you and rubs circles on your back either way, and lets you cry.

The door swings open a third time. Heimerdinger lets out a surprised squeal.

"Oh—uh sorry."

You flinch at the sound of her voice. Quickly pulling away from Ekko, you step back a few paces, and wipe your eyes. Your eyes stay glued to the ground, you can't bring yourself to look at her. Jinx's final words start replaying again in your head. There's not much you can do to distract yourself but to try and move your injured hand. It works, and the immediate pain keeps your grieving mind at bay.

"Hey, your hand." She speaks up again.

Fuck.

"It's nothing." You put your injured hand behind your back, grimacing as the pain shoots through you. "I…slipped."

A poor excuse, really. You're sure all three of them can see the blood stain on the wall, but you're not looking at any of them. So who knows, maybe they didn't see it.

"I uh—have something to do with Ekko and Professor." You keep your eyes low as you send a pointed look to Heimerdinger. He shrugs in response. "So we should really go—"

Ekko thankfully mutters in agreement with you, but Powder doesn't budge. "Ekko! Your friend's hurt, and we have a perfectly stocked first aid kit here."

As if on cue, you hiss as pain shoots up from your hand.

"See?"

"Perhaps it would be better if you allowed Ms. Powder to take a look at your hand." You let out a defeated sigh. Not like you can blame either of them—they don't know what happened to you.

Powder tries to reach for you, but you step away and start walking to the door. She thankfully takes the hint and guides you all through the bar.

------

You're all ushered into the back room that serves as a storage area for the staff, which just meant Vander's children. Powder sets you down on a chair, while Ekko and Heimerdinger whisper in hushed tones in the opposite corner of the room.

Against your request, it's Powder who cleans your hand, and dress it in bandages. She's also the one to put a bag of ice on it to help with the swelling. You're the one blinking back tears or wiping your eyes, claiming it to be pain from your hand.

She's the one to make small conversations, that you give curt replies to.

She's the one to ask you about yourself, that you shut down immediately, claiming to be uncomfortable with personal questions.

She's the one that reaches out, you're the one to pull away.

You still can't look at her, so you settle on staring at whatever interesting item is off to the side or on the ground.

Eventually she gives up, and leaves you with Ekko and Heimerdinger while she goes back to work, claiming she'll be back in a bit.

"What happened to you?" Ekko rushes over to you as soon as the door closes, concern written all over his face. He gestures to your bandages. "And what happened to your hand?"

You shrug tiredly. You could really use a nap right now. "I jumped through one too many realities."

Heimerdinger pipes up. "One too many?"

"Yeah, like, multiple ones…" Your eyebrows knit at his question. "Have neither of you…"

"No." Ekko shakes his head. Moving his chair to sit next to you. "How many realities have you been to, exactly?"

You blink. "This is two hundred and fifteen."

"Two hundred and fifteen?" Heimerdinger drops his banjo and rushes towards you. "And you're still mentally intact?" He drags a chair towards you and hoists himself up onto the table. Pulling out a pen light, he starts shining it on your eyes. "Your pupils looks normal, and I don't see any burst blood vessels…" He continues ramble to you until Ekko steps in.

"Professor, give her some breathing room."

"Oh right, my apologies." Heimerdinger scratches the back of his head sheepishly as he puts away the pen light.

"Okay then." Ekko sits back in his chair, leaning a bit toward you. "So, does jumping through different realities make you beat up a wall and cry?"

Fuck.

"I…I'm fine."

A sigh escapes your friend's lips as he crosses his arms, a frown on his face. "I've never seen you cry, then suddenly you're a sobbing mess."

You let out a shaky breath at his words, muttering a complaint.

"Look, I can't imagine what could have happened to you in over two hundred timelines. I can't even imagine how much time passed for you—"

"Five years, and a few months?" Ekko's eyes widen at the revelation.

"Five years? No wonder you're acting different." He puts a hand on your shoulder. "I can't help you if you won't talk to me—"

"Yeah, well maybe I don't need help." You quip, shrugging his hand off your shoulder. The expression on his face doesn't turn sour. If any, it becomes sympathetic.

"A friend to listen to you, then." He sends you a small smile, and you immediately regret snapping at him.

You tear your eyes at him to stare at the door Powder went through. "It's…illogical and kind of absurd if we're being honest."

"If I may, my dear. We're in an alternate reality where our lives are drastically different." Heimerdinger says as he picks up his banjo. "I think we've long departed the realms of logic and coherence."

You're hit with a sudden appreciation for your two companions. The familiarity, and the fact that you finally have people to speak with about your timeline jumping, makes you feel less alone after so long. And Heimerdinger is right, you're long past logic, so why not explain to them that you think you're meant to be with one person for eternity?

You run your uninjured hand down your face. "Do either of you believe in soulmates?" Ekko and Heimerdinger exchange looks, before turning back to you with puzzled expressions.

"Soulmates are a thing?" Your friend asks.

You sigh, trying to find the best way to explain. "I'm not exactly sure." A lie, and you know it. "No, wait, I'm sure. Soulmates are a thing, at least for me. I can't confirm for anyone else."

A look of realization hits Ekko. "Jinx... Wait, Jinx?"

"Yeah, that was my reaction too." You say as you pinch the bridge of your nose.

"So you're saying, you're soulmates with one of the Firelight's biggest enemies?" His eyes are wide, you can almost see the gears in his head move.

"You know, enemies to lovers stories are usually a huge hit."

"You don't even read."

"A lot can happen in five years."

"Alright, children, settle down!" Heimerdinger puts his hands up in a placating manner. "I for one, would like to know how you came to find this out. How fascinating! To know your soul is tied to someone." Yeah, fascinating.

"So, how did you find out?" Ekko nudges you with his elbow. You throw him a scowl in response, before rolling your eyes and looking over to Heimerdinger.

"Every timeline. It was always her." You think back to the first time you jumped. "I remember the first jump I did. I was hurt, and she came running over. I remember feeling safe around her; I was only there for a few minutes before I got dragged somewhere else. And then, every jump after, I was either with her already, or at some point headed there. There was never anyone else."

"Was that all? Relationships that kept spanning across timelines?" The professor asks.

"No, not just that. I felt—" Feel. "—this pull towards her. There were times that I'd know where she was if we were close enough to each other."

"How intriguing." Heimerdinger starts pacing the room. "Never in my long life would I have guessed the existence of soulmates. And I've lived a very long life!"

"So something happened in the last one, then?" Ekko cuts in. Your jaw clenches, the reminder hitting you like a bucket of cold water.

"She died, in the last one. Shot herself, to protect me." His mouth falls open at your words, eyes widening slightly.

A heavy silence falls over the three of you; Heimerdinger sighs and walks over, giving you a pat on your knee. "Loss is already such a confounding and jarring experience. I can't imagine it what it felt like to lose one you're destined to be with."

"I didn't even have time to deal with it. I got pulled here right after it happened." Your run your good hand through your hair. "I feel the grief, but I also feel how happy the me in this timeline is when she sees Jinx."

"You coexist with the version of you in this reality?" The professor cocks a bushy eyebrow. You nod.

"Yes, it took a while to get used to. Even longer to manage."

"Well, if that isn't a shining example of your mental fortitude, then I don't know what is!" His enthusiasm softens as he gives you another pat. "You'll make it through your grief, I promise you that." He throws you a reassuring smile. And you feel your spirits lift a bit.

"You and Jinx, huh?" Ekko rubs his chin thoughtfully. "You know, I could see it." He yelps as you punch him in the shoulder with your good hand. "What? I'm trying to be helpful."

"Well you're not."

Heimerdinger ignores yours and Ekko's antics, curious eyes looking at you in anticipation. "So dear, tell me about these realities. Were all two hundred of them different from each other?" You shake your head.

"Not all of them were different, some timelines have very miniscule variations from each other, but are still the same with everything else that's there." You look up around the room. "I've been to this reality at least thrice."

"Incredible!" Heimerdinger exclaims, jumping up from his seat. "And how many unique realities have you been to?"

"Seventy-one, I think?"

"Was there a pattern you followed?"

"No, I just got jumped from one to another."

"How long were you in each reality?"

"I—usually a little over a week."

"Were there consistent behaviors between timelines?"

"I can hear you thinking from over there."

"Got something to say to me?"

You wince, shaking the memory away. "How big did the variations get?"

"Okay, jelly legs."

"Easy there, jelly legs."

"I don’t—"

"Oh, what about the people! How different were we from ourselves?"

"Okay, professor! Breathing room?" Ekko cuts in. Heimerdinger mutters an apology for his excitement. You pinch the bridge of your nose with your uninjured hand and sigh. So much for a distraction. "You okay?"

You nod despite obviously feeling the opposite—if Ekko of Heimerdinger notice, they mercifully don't bring it up—and sink a little further into your chair.

"Let's take a step back from the reality hopping, alright? We still need to figure out how to get home." He looks towards Heimerdinger, who's taken to plucking a tune on his banjo. "Professor, you said that Hextech doesn't exist here, which means there's no anomaly?"

"Precisely."

"Which just means we need to figure out a way to make our own Hextech." The both of them turn to you.

"I'm afraid once just can't go about creating their own Hextech, my dear. Without Jayce's notes, and the crystals—"

"Powder has a stash of them."

"—Excuse me?!"

"—A stash?"

The corner of your lip twitches, and you almost smile. But the crushing reminder that comes with Powder's name quickly grounds you. "She has them at her hideout."

Ekko's eyebrows furrow. "And you know this because…"

You shrug. "She told me, in the other timelines."

"Even so!" The professor gets in between you and Ekko. "Tampering with the Arcane is the reason we're in this very predicament! Who knows what mayhem we'll cause if we try to do it on purpose." Heimerdinger nods over to you. "It's a miracle we didn't have any physical side effects from changing realities."

"Well…" You say before you can stop yourself, causing Heimerdinger's eyebrows shoot up. "I had this thing on my arm." You pull the sleeve of your shirt up, revealing only the faded outline of the mark. "When I first noticed it, it was only my second jump—it was the same pattern as the one on our tree. But now," You run your hand over the faded outline. "It's just this. It was fading every jump I had."

Heimerdinger walks over and pulls out a magnifying glass. "Incredible. To think that the anomaly attached itself to you… Did you take note of any side effects?"

"There weren't any. I was disoriented the first few jumps, but eventually I got used to them."

"Well, if anything. This is a damning reason for us not to further meddle with the Arcane." He pockets the magnifying glass and huffs, Ekko and yourself understandably in disagreement. The latter stands up from his chair, frustrated with the professor.

"We don't belong here, professor. We have people who need us!" Heimerdinger tuts at Ekko and picks up his banjo, idly plucking the strings.

"You two just need to give it time."

"I've been jumping around timelines for five years, I've had more than enough time. I want to go home." The chair you're sitting on screeches as you push yourself off of it, and you start pacing the room. "Besides, I don't know if losing the mark means I stop jumping. I have a little over a week at most. The least I can do is get the both of you out of here."

A frown tugs at Ekko's mouth. "Wait. You mean there's a chance you can't come home with us?"

You sigh. "The conservative answer is yes. Look, we can recreate the anomaly here. We just need the—"

"Am I interrupting smart people discourse?"

You jump at Powder's words, and quickly retreat beside Ekko, eyes glued again to the ground. You don't miss the concerned look your friend gives you.

"Of course not, Ms. Powder." Heimerdinger starts walking to the door, much to yours and Ekko's chagrin. "You two take some time to get situated, clear your minds, and come find me afterwards."

Ekko shrugs from the corner of your eye. "I should get going."

You whip your head around to stare at your friend. "What?"

He puts his hands up. "I have to go uh—look at that thing you told me to check out."

You narrow your eyes at him. Did you miss some code word that was agreed upon? Ekko sighs as he walks behind Powder, you abandoning your quest to avoid looking at the girl in favor of figuring out what the hell your friend is saying.

"You get the thing you told us you needed, and then we can meet back with the professor."

"What?" Ekko looks at you pointedly, then at Powder.

Oh. The Gemstones.

Realization seemingly crosses your features, as Ekko promptly says his goodbye and shuts the door.

Leaving you with Powder. Did they not listen to your grief-filled monologue?

"Well, at least you're finally looking at me." She lets out an awkward chuckle. "Or at least, my general direction."

It's unfair, really; seeing the love of your life die in front of you one second, only for her to stand in front of you—alive and breathing—in the next. Her eyes still alight, curious, inviting.

And you, the mess of you. With your confusion, shock, grief, guilt; melding with relief, and the urge to hold her. The self-conscious look on her face already tearing down the walls you had just put up to protect what was left of your sanity. You couldn't even get away if you tried—and you've tried—because she'd follow you somehow, or you'd inevitably find your way back to her.

The bond of your souls demands to stay intertwined.

"So, do you need help with whatever you were getting?"

You blink. "Huh?"

Her lips curl into an amused smile. "Ekko said you had a thing you needed, that I totally believe exists by the way."

The easiness of how she speaks to you feels like a pair of hands wrapping around your throat. But it was between the friendly approach, or the concerned approach. The latter meant she'd ask why you were crying, so you'll just have to take this one and run with it.

"Uh, yeah." The words come out scratchy, there's an ever-present heaviness in your chest as you look at her, smiling at you. You clear your throat in an attempt to collect yourself. You found Ekko and Heimerdinger, and you have a week to get them—and hopefully yourself—home. You just need to push down the grief until then.

"You know anything about intradimensional travel?"

------

"So let me get this straight. You think you can create a way to transport anything from point A to B at light speed?"

"Not light speed, that's an entirely different can of worms." Powder rolls her eyes at you, leaning back into her bean bag chair.

It surprisingly took no effort for her to take you to her hideout; she even introduced you to Vi. A part of you wonders if this is because she felt sorry for you, but you can't really complain if it brings you closer to the energy crystals.

"Alright hotshot, what is it then?"

"It's more like—" You wince as you try to gesture with your injured hand. "—teleportation." You slouch into your own chair, resting your hand carefully on your stomach. "With magic."

She scoffs. "Can you do magic?"

"Nope."

"Pfft. Get a load of this guy, sis." Your eyes flit to Vi, sitting in her corner. "Sorry." There's a hint of embarrassment in Powder's eyes when you look back at her scratching the back of her neck. Only a second of confusion before you remember that you're a stranger to her here. "You must think I'm weird, talking to a plush of my dead sister. Which I'm not—I mean, I am talking to her. I meant the weird part, but if you ask my brothers they'd probably say I am weird—"

"I don’t think it's weird."

Another roll of her eyes. "Sure you don't."

"I think it helps." You say firmly, sitting up as best you can in a bean bag chair. "Talking to someone who's died, it keeps their memory alive, keeps me sane. Makes me feel like…everything's still normal, even though it's not."

Her eyes soften at your words; an expression you've seen thousands of times. One that used to give you comfort, now also draping you with the blanket of grief and guilt.

"You lost someone."

You tear your gaze away from her, choosing to stare at the drawer you know the energy crystals are stored. "I got her killed."

There's a shifting from Powder's side, and you turn to find her dragging her bean bag next to you, before flopping down and sighing. A few beats of silence pass before she speaks.

"When my sister died, I blamed myself for a really long time." Her eyes glisten as she looks at the altar she made for Vi, distant. "Back when things were harder for us down here, we did odd jobs from tips we'd get from Ekko."

A story you've heard hundreds of times, every version a bit different than the one before, but you'd listen every single time.

"There were these crystals. They looked valuable to me, so I took 'em. Didn't realize I dropped one and I guess it hit something." She sits up, hugging her knees towards her chest. "Next thing I know, half the apartment's blown up, and Vi…she put me under her so I'd be safe." You hear a sniffle as she suddenly looks away, not so subtly wiping her eyes. "We stopped doing jobs after that, focused on making things better here."

"I'm sorry." She snorts.

"Hey, I'm trying to comfort you, not the other way around." She puts her legs down, knocking her knee onto yours. "Anyway. My point is, she would've hated it if I spent the rest of my life blaming myself for what happened. If I just decided to be miserable all the time." A shrug, and she's standing up and stretching. "I sure as hell wouldn’t want her to blame herself, anyone of my family or friends really, if I was the one that died protecting them."

Forgiveness, handed out so nonchalantly. Completely unaware of the weight of her words. You almost hate feeling the weight lift off your shoulders; her forgiveness hadn't been earned, could never be earned. Not for Jinx.

But she still has the same soul.

"Alright, how exactly are we making your non-magic magic machine?" She says as she offers you a hand.

Still the same soul.

"We'll need to clear out some space." You say as you take her hand.

-----

Zero

"How fucking long were we gone?"

"Professor Heimerdinger…"

"There's Noxian's everywhere. What the hell's going on—Ekko!" You grab your friend by the shoulders, shaking him. "We won't have time to mourn the professor if we get sliced in half. We need to get home."

Ekko blinks a few times, before taking a deep breath and nodding. "You're right, you're right." He peeks his head out of the alleyway you're both hiding in, spotting Noxians soldiers pushing people out of their homes. "Why are they all here?"

"Beats me, but this can't be good." He ducks his head back in, unconsciously tucking the Z-Drive closer to him.

"We're you in any timelines where this happened?"

You nod. "Yes, but they were never in the Undercity. We were the ones taking the fight to them and Piltover."

The both of you stick to the wall as a group of Noxians soldiers march past, headed deeper into the Undercity. There was no way the both you could sneak back to the tunnel lines with that many eyes moving around. A curse is muttered at the thought, you needed to know how much time passed, and how much had changed in your absence.

"If only we could've gone back right after we left here." You rub your face in your hands. "I must've messed something up with the runes—"

"Hey, what happened to getting home being the top priority?" Ekko elbows you lightly on your side. "We can refine your rune work later," He points up to the roofs. "If we can't avoid getting to the tunnels from the ground, we'll have to cross the rooftops."

"Rooftops." You nod.

The both of you start climbing up pipes that are sticking out of the ground and around the buildings. Eventually making it onto a balcony, before jumping across the top of a smaller building. It provides you with a clearer view of the Undercity, still looking the same from where you are, despite the obvious changes occurring on the ground. The neon glow from various establishments, the ever present whir of the vents running through the streets, the gloomy allure atmosphere. Hell, even the smell was the same.

Ekko lands next to you, dusting himself off before surveying the skyline. "It's like nothing's changed from up here." He muses, reiterating your thoughts. You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding.

"We made it back...We actually did it." He looks over to you, putting a hand on your shoulder.

"Welcome back."

"Welcome back to you too, Ekko." He snorts, giving your shoulder another squeeze before letting go.

"Alright, let's head home." Ekko starts moving towards the next roof, and you follow suit. Each step you take giving you more confidence. Son enough, the both of you are running and leaping across rooftops.

You greedily breathe in the air, not caring at all that most people would consider Undercity air to be polluted. This was home. After spending five years trying to find a way back, who the hell could judge you?

"Hurry up!" Ekko shouts from ahead of you. Grinning, you lean forward and start kicking the ground harder.

"I'm just giving you a head start!" You say as you easily speed past Ekko, who huffs and matches your speed.

For a moment, you forget about all of your worries. You forget about the two hundred and sixteen jumps you did, all of the panic you went through, all of the memories you made, the lives you lived. It's just you and once of your closest friends, running through the rooftops of your city—your city. Not a variation of it in some other timeline. It's the place where you grew up, the place you're trying to fix and make better for the people. You run past familiar stores and landmarks, feeling your nostalgia grow by the second. It's a freeing sensation; leaving for years, then coming back home. Seeing everything be both familiar and new at the same time.

There's a billowing of dark smoke from your periphery. You almost miss it, but you turn your head and spot the smoke growing steadily. Unconsciously, you turn and start heading to where the smoke is. Ekko calls out to you, but starts to follow when he sees it as well.

You stop dead in your tracks when you find the source of the smoke. Dread starts to build in your chest.

The Last Drop, engulfed in flames.

There's no thought process involved before you jump down and enter the burning building, telling Ekko you'll meet him back home. You don't even heed Ekko's calls as you slide through a doorway before it collapses behind you.

-----

Your hands feel around for your gas mask hidden inside your coat, a sigh of relief as your eyes stop watering and you're able to breathe. Navigating The Last Drop is easy enough, you've been here plenty of times in the other timelines. But the problem wasn't finding your way around, it was figuring out why you decided to jump in in the first place.

Was it the thought of someone being stuck inside and needing help? Or was it the feeling of dread creeping up on you?

The sound of crackling wood fills your ears as you look up, a supports beam starts to collapse. You quickly duck out of the way before it falls, having no choice but to push in deeper into the bar. You start to think—hope—that no one is inside, since you haven't seen a single soul as you went from one room to the next.

You feel the pull before you register that it's her.

But this one is different, stronger. Enough that you almost stumble forward, as if it's somehow physically pushing you closer. You feel it wrap around your heart, clutching it tight, almost painfully so. The feeling of longing rushes over you, not the small waves that you felt in the other timelines, but a raging current, crashing through you and sweeping you towards her.

You wonder briefly why the feeling was much more intense. Was it because you were in other timelines? Did your soul know that they were Jinx, but they weren't your Jinx? Will she also feel this when she sees you? If this is what every other version of you felt when they were with their Jinx, their Powder, no wonder they can't keep themselves away from her.

She hasn't even seen you yet.

She has her back turned to you, hands limply at her side. Her hair jaggedly cut short, just above her shoulders, which are slumped in defeat. An almost instinctive need to comfort her enters your mind, but you push it down. The first thing you need to do is get her out of here.

She doesn't react violently when you pull her towards you, telling her that you had to get out of there. Does nothing when you pick her up and bring her out the side of the building. The same alleyway where you two would sneak off to steal kisses in one timeline, and mourned the loss of her in another. She's too stunned to do anything really. Maybe she felt the pull, maybe she was just surprised that someone had gone in to fish her out. But she doesn't do anything as you set her down and take off your gas mask. Nothing when you look over her, covered in soot and grime, to search for any injuries.

The second you meet her eyes, you know, you're sure, that her soul is letting her know who you are. That she's suddenly fallen into that same raging river that you find yourself in right now.

The surprise in her eyes softens, the same look you've seen thousands of times, that you'd try to find wherever you are.

The pull makes itself known again, probably ecstatic that you've found her in your own timeline. Not that you wouldn't have, anyway. Not even the omnipotent force that created every timeline to ever exist can keep you from finding her.

CRACK

But maybe a broken nose will.

You stagger backward. A hand over your nose, eyes wide from shock and confusion. She's polite enough to not say anything after she punches you. She awkwardly stands there and watches you curse as you push your nose back into place, wiping off the blood with your gloved hand. Yup, definitely broken.

At this point, two hundred and sixteen jumps after, you should really learn to be more vigilant when it comes to tackling unpredictable situations.

You keep a hand on your nose, one hand up on surrender. She still has her hand closed into a fist, but there's a shocked look on her face.

She Blinks a few times, before a look of frustration is on her face. "Who the hell are you?!" Her eyebrows are knit together; if your nose wasn't broken, you would find her confused frustration adorable.

"I thought you needed help." Your voice comes out nasally, and you can almost feel the bruises start to form.

"I don't need your stupid help."

Stubborn.

"Well who just stands inside a burning building?!" She huffs crossing her arms over her chest. It's now that you notice she's missing a few things from her usual outfit; her choker, the string marking the X on her top, her gloves—and had she been crying?

"First of all, stop looking at me like that, you creep. Second, it's none of your business."

"I literally just saved your—" The sound of clanking armor, and boots hitting the ground cuts you off.

You grab her hand without thinking, and pull her farther into the alleyway, away from the fire and the soldiers that have started to gather. Again, she's surprised, but doesn't protest. She doesn't let go even after you've stopped running.

"We need to get out of here. I have a safe house but it's a bit far. If we start moving now—"

"My place is closer." She tugs at your hand to get your attention—your eyes flitting down the same time as her—and you both realize that they're still clasped together.

You wait for her to let go of you, throw your hand and call you a creep again. For a moment you think she actually will; you see the conflicting emotions in her eyes. But she still doesn't.

"Just... follow me." She says tiredly, nodding down a road and half dragging you to her hideout. She only lets go of your hand when there's a tight squeeze into a tunnel and it would be too awkward to walk in side by side.

Neither of you talk the entire way there. You don't ask her where her hideout is—not that you need to, you could get there with your eyes closed at this point. She doesn't ask you how you can easily navigate through tricky the walkways and hidden passages.

At first you think she's still processing how she's feeling, but you remember the tear streaks, and the way her shoulders sagged as she looked at The Last Drop burning down. You wonder again how long you've been gone, what had happened to her in the meantime. Even now, she has her head down as she walks. Her demeanor completely different from the last time you saw her.

"I can hear you thinking from over here." She says nonchalantly. She sounds tired, her irritation from earlier long gone. "I'm not leading you to some murder house, if that's what you're wondering."

You shrug out of habit. "I know, I trust you."

Her head tilts up just a bit as she stops walking. She turns her head slightly to the side, just enough that she can see you from the corner of her eye. "You shouldn't." She doesn't wait for an answer before she starts walking again, and you're left to follow her in silence the rest of the way.

There's a hesitation in her step once you reach her hideout, stopping right in front of her desk, hands balled into fists. She tries to take a steadying breath, but it comes out shaky and uneven.

You take a look around her space, noticing how brighter everything is. Not like the other timelines where you meet her as Jinx, not like Powder's either. The space was more cleared out, lights had been added, a makeshift fort had been put over her couch.

She picks up something small on the desk, you recognize it as a smaller version of the robots you two made in a few timelines. Her eyes are distant as she turns it over in her hand, before setting it back down on the table. She doesn't look back at you as she speaks.

"Why'd you help me back there?"

"I would've helped whoever was in there regardless."

She scoffs, turning to face you, leaning against her desk. "Figures with you people."

"What's that supposed to mean?" You ask as you walk closer to her.

"You're a Firelight." You halt in your tracks just a few steps away, a puzzled look on your face. She's never figured that part out in any of the other timelines, either. "I've seen you before." She adds. "You always have your stupid mask on, but," A shrug, as she looks off to the side. "I recognized your eyes."

It's almost funny.

You spent the last five years learning that your soul wanted to be with Jinx, and this entire time, she's probably known hers wanted you.

There's a myriad of questions that pop up in your head, but Jinx is still upset about something, and figuring that out was more important.

"Why'd you burn the place down?" She crosses her arms at your question, keeping her gaze on the ground.

"I was breaking the cycle, or whatever that means." She sits down on a chair, and starts tinkering with a chomper on the desk.

"What were you gonna do after?"

"Haven't figured that part out yet."

"What about—"

"Coast should be clear by now, you can leave if you want." Her tone maintains the same aloofness she's had this entire time, but her shoulders are tense, her movements as she works on the chomper almost robotic.

Even though you’re guaranteed that your souls are entwined in every possible timeline, you find yourself at a loss for words. All the bravado and confidence that you’d carried with you with every other version of her, gone out the window. You really shouldn’t be worried, you know she’ll love you, she always does, she always will. Even when she's kicking you out.

Only this wasn’t the Jinx fighting for Zaun’s liberation, wasn’t the mildly annoying Academy classmate that got you into trouble, nor was she the Jinx that waited for you for years to be ready to come back to her.

This was your Jinx. And you know something is wrong.

"Do you want me to leave?"

Her hands stop moving, but you can see that her grip on her tools has tightened, her knuckles going white.

She knows you. Longer than you've known her in your timeline. You're not leaving her knowing that. So instead, you finish walking the last few steps to get to her, your hand hesitating slightly before resting on her shoulder.

The dam breaks, as she drops her tools, hands closing into fists. "You're not safe here." Her voice cracks as she speaks. "Everyone around me—" She clamps her mouth shut and looks away.

Things start to fall into place. "You lost someone."

She lets out a bitter laugh. "I've lost a lot of someones." You see her blink a few times before she turns to you, shrugging off your hand in the process. "So you best get out of here, toots. I'm no good for you."

"I don't know, I think I've survived you enough times." She shakes her head, turning back to the abandoned chomper.

"You have no idea what you're saying." You sigh, getting down on a knee so your eyes are level with her. She's taken aback by your actions, her eyes reflecting a cautious but curious glint in them.

"I do, actually." A questioning look is the only response you get from her. "I'd explain, but I'll have to ask you to not to think I'm crazy."

Her gaze softens, just a pinch.

"Have you even met me?" Yes, you want to say. I've met you two hundred and sixteen times, and I'll gladly stay here until my knee is sore just so I can explain to you how.

"Not yet," You say instead, you extend your hand. "But I'd like to."

Destined souls or not, you're aware that you're pushing your luck. A smidgen of doubt starts to form in your mind, when she does nothing but stare at your outstretched hand. You can see the conflicting emotions in her eyes. Whoever she lost, it was enough that she doesn't want to keep anyone close to her anymore. A sentiment that you can understand, given that you wanted to stay away from any variation of her after you lost her once. But you don't want to leave her, not like this, not when there's a gnawing feeling in your gut that she's not okay enough to be left alone. So you hold your breath, standing by your decision.

Her eyes flit back to yours, and you hope the determined look in your eye is enough to sway her.

"You're gonna regret this." There's a pleading tone to her words, as if she's begging you to turn away and leave her. Fat chance, really.

A soft, reassuring smile. "We'll cross that bridge when we get there."

She searches your eyes for any trace of doubt, or deceit, but she will find none.

Her hand reaches out to yours, and you wonder if she feels the same spark of electricity that shoots through you when your hands touch.

"Grab a chair." She says, but inconveniently doesn't let go of your hand. "You down on a knee is too intimate."

You laugh, and for the first time since you've met her, you see her relax, a smile on her face.

"Fair enough."

And she listens. About Ekko seeing the anomaly on one of the leaves of your tree, the three of you breaking into Jayce's lab, heading to the Hex gate, you idiotically reaching out to the anomaly. You show her the faded outline that the anomaly left on you, and she gingerly traces the mark with her finger.

You tell her about your first jump, how your mind struggled with the Other You, as you crawled your way to cover. How you she came and saved you. You don't outright say that you're soulmates, simply because you don't want to scare her off. Not even if she probably already knows. She doesn't say anything when you first mention you two meeting, but you see her figure it out by the time you're telling her about your eighth jump. Her eyes narrow, but she lets you continue. Patiently listening as you explain, part by part, that in every reality, in every timeline, it's always you and her. It will always be you and her.

You're able to coax a laugh out of her when you tell her about your misadventures as academy students, she even teases you for being a stickler for the rules. She argues with you when you tell her that you always beat her in hand to hand combat "I could beat you any day, toots." Denies it when you tell her that she tended to sulk if you didn't give her attention, when she's be uncharacteristically thoughtful.

She holds your hand when you tell her how you lost her, how she sacrificed herself for your safety. Squeezes it when you tell her that the next version of herself is the one that pulls you out of your grief.

You explain the pull you feel when she's around, and how much stronger it feels when it's her. She interrupts you, then. Confirming that she had already known about it for a few years, right after she first saw you in a firefight. There's a blush on her cheeks as she confesses that she'd always tried to not hurt you after, and that she'd randomly seek you out to mess with you from time to time.

Eventually, she tells you how long you and your friends have been gone. What's happened to her since, about the attack at the Piltover Memorial, Vi and Caitlyn coming after her. How she met a little girl named Isha, and the strange little family she had formed with her and Sevika. You don't miss the sad, faraway look in her eyes when she recounts the adventures they had, their own little robot fight club, them making over her hideout. How they made a good situation out of everything, despite the Noxians and enforcers occupying Zaun.

You're surprised when she mentions Vander, and the short stint of happiness her and Vi had when their little family was able to reunite. She chokes up when she tells you how short lived it was, how she had been reckless in allowing Isha to come with them, that she finally understood why Vi told her to stay out of a fight all those years ago.

You hold her close to you when the tears come, and she shakes in your arms.

By the end of it all, you're both lying on her couch, and she's passed out on your chest. The physical and emotional exhaustion from the last few weeks finally catching up to her.

You spend the time processing all the information you learned; about the war, Viktor, Jayce. How there was a lot more weight now to the sacrifice Heimerdinger made for you and Ekko. You're sure he's already rallying people to join the fight, but from what Jinx had told you, Zaun won't fully unite until she's on board, too.

She's tired of it all, but she'll probably relent if you ask her. But that's an issue for tomorrow. Right now, you settle on holding her close.

And if only you hadn't asked her.

If only you had kept your mouth shut, and let her rest.

If only you hadn't put her in danger, again.

Your lungs burn as you run through smoke, not caring if your eyes can barely see anything, or that your legs are screaming for you to stop and take a break. You can't, not when you didn’t try hard enough to stop her, not when you could've asked her to stay instead.

You make it to the Hex Gate, the smell of burnt metal and wiring fills your nose and brings you to a coughing fit. You still shout her name, at the top of your lungs, hoping that she'll hear you. You start to lift debris and stray slabs of concrete. There's only a numbness in your hands as you cut and burn them while digging our rubble. Not a care in the world that there could still be explosive hazards in the area. The only thing on your mind was Jinx.

The desperation starts to build with every passing minute, the pull in your chest is painful, screaming at you to find her. Even as the smoke slowly clears, the momentary reprieve from searching blind not stopping you from your erratic search. You continue to clear the rubble, your hands smearing blood on every piece of debris you touch. This does nothing to bother you, though. You'd paint every inch of this room red before you stop looking for her.

You collapse to your knees, grabbing onto a large piece of rubble for support. This wasn't how things were supposed to go. Just when you find your way back, when you finally have her with you. Five years and hundreds of jumps, only for you to lose her again.

You lay your head against the concrete, as the tears start streaming down your face.

Then a cough, the sound of shifting debris and rock hits your ears.

You bolt upright, ears straining to listen. For a few seconds, there's nothing, and you almost thing that you're getting high from the fumes. But you hear a groan, then you're feet are already kicking the ground.

Smaller pieces of rubble start moving around, and you quickly claw away it, clearing everything away until you catch sight of a hand. You've never been happier to see chipped nail polish in your life.

You ignore the ache in your arms as you lift every piece of heavy rock, until Jinx has enough room to grab onto you and you pull her out.

There's a deep gash on her side, a few cuts, and bruises already forming. She starts coughing, but there's no blood. Good. She's breathing, alive.

"You regret meeting me, yet?" She manages a smile, and your heart soars.

"No, not yet, at least." You wipe your eyes with the back of your palms, sniffling.

"Hey, hey, easy." She puts a hand on your chest to stop you from picking her up. "Your hands are bleeding."

"You have a gash on your stomach."

"I heal quick, you don't." She shoots you a warning glare when you try to pick her up again, and you relent.

"I thought I lost you again." The tears well up in your eyes, and her glare softens. She pulls you closer until your foreheads are touching.

"Sorry to disappoint," She starts. "But you're stuck with me forever."

You fail at stifling your laughter. "Sounds like a good deal to me."

She cups your face in her hands, running a thumb across your cheek, and you instinctively lean into her touch.

"Help me up, yeah?"

You oblige. You always do. You always will.

#arcane #arcane netflix #jinx x reader #arcane x reader #arcane jinx #arcane jayce #arcane vi #arcane caitlyn #arcane ekko #jinx #ekko #heimerdinger #Caitlyn #Jayce #Vi

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writingthroughmyass · 5 months ago

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Service Animal (Part one)

My mans Logan Howlett X Reader (afab)

Part two here

WARNING: This is soooo self insert it's not even funny. I get weird migraines that present like absent seizures and thought it would be nice to get a warning beforehand by my favourite babygirl Logan (like my own personal service animal). This is gonna be in three parts, it's mostly finished and ends in smooshing so be ready for that ;)

UPDATE: turns out my migraines are actually mini strokes :)

The after effects of using your power was kicking your ass.

In a daze, you made it to your private room and went straight to your bathroom. You felt the nausea rising up in your throat and quickly opened the toilet lid to throw up.

The multiple alternate realities of what could have happened tonight flashed before your eyes. Ororo, Jean, Scott, Logan, all collapsed on the floor, dead. Their screams played in a relentless loop in your head; you were dissociating badly. Your surroundings melted away until there was nothing but the countless ways they could have died if you hadn't bent reality to avoid it.

Always. It's always like this.

Gradually, you begin to return to your body, only to realise there was someone in the room with you, holding your hair back.

Terrified, your body snapped up from its kneeling position to face the intruder.

“Woah, hey, it's just me. Calm down.”

“L-Logan?” you slurred, suddenly feeling self conscious of the smell of your breath.

“I knocked and called out but you didn't answer. So I came in to check on you.”

You eyed him, feeling suspicious of how out of character this was for him.

“Why are you looking at me like I'm lying? I'm not totally heartless,” he said defensively.

“Why'd you come in the first place to see me though? I thought you were pissed with me,” you grumble.

When you'd overdone it with your powers, Logan threw a hissy fit and yelled at you for going too far. While you knew it was out of care, it still rankled you that he was acting as if you were a child. You knew what you were doing.

“I… just had a bad feeling,” he said quietly. “Y'know how I've got my heightened senses. I could tell something was off with you.”

“I'm fine. Just need to rest. This is normal for me.”

You turned around to the bathroom sink and grabbed your toothbrush. You gave your teeth and tongue a quick clean, wanting to just wash all the blood off your body so you could sleep.

It felt like you had a raging hangover from drinking Everclear all night.

When you turned from the sink you noticed Logan was still there.

“Uh… need something? I wanna get ready for bed and pass out.”

“Yeah, I need to know you're okay,” he says.

“I told you, I'm fine. I'm going to shower so please leave.”

Your patience was wearing thin. But you were also aware that some of it was nervousness coming out as aggression. You couldn't deny the attraction you felt towards him, although his attitude left much to be desired. His behaviour tonight was quite frankly really sweet and it was psyching you out. You were already in the midst of losing touch with reality and his actions were so contradictory to his usual self that it was causing you a psychotic break.

“You're not listening to me,” he ground out, losing some of his own patience. “I'm telling you that something is wrong with you.”

You stared silently at him, mouth slightly hanging open.

“Okay, that came out the wrong way.” He was ruffling his hair in agitation. Cute. “What I'm saying is- I'm… ah…”

“Please, Logan, I just want a shower so I can go to bed…”

“Look, I'll just wait in your room and I'll leave once you're in bed safe, ‘kay,” he says, turning to the door and walking out, shutting it behind himself.

Fuck.

You just wanted to be alone so you could have a good cry. You were incredibly confused about what in the world was going on but now you were really getting scared. And Logan's words were not helping.

What if he's right and this time your connection with reality has been completely severed? But what else were you supposed to do? Let them all die? Even with your special training with Charles, your power was so unruly and chaotic that it was terrifying. You had to be careful or there would be no way back.

You got undressed and turned on the shower, stepping inside. It was only once you were under the hot stream of water that you realised you'd left your pyjamas in your bedroom. You groaned aloud. Fuck, now you'd have to walk in front of Logan in nothing but a towel. Why the fuck was he here? You wished he'd just leave.

You watched the dried blood wash away from your skin, turning the floor of your shower a bright red.

You felt your stomach drop and your head turned fuzzy. The sound of your shower disappeared. The safety of your surroundings melted away.

Scott, his eyes gouged out from his head. Ororo’s limbs crumpled every which way, her eyes clouded over not because of her powers but because she was lifeless. Jean, her neck holding on to her body by a thread, her cranium blasted open and her brain dripping down her face.

Logan, on the ground, ripped to shreds, his Adamantium bones showing through his torn flesh. And the wounds weren't healing.

It was always like this. As if you were being punished for playing god. It was as if all the horrible realities you prevented from happening still lived on but solely in your mind, driving you insane. It left scars of trauma on your psyche, Charles had told you. So you had to be careful in how you used your powers or you may become completely untethered from reality. A fate worse than death.

Vaguely, you could hear yourself mumbling and gasping and swallowing loudly, trying to find some kind of equilibrium in the mess of your mind.

You were trying desperately to connect back with your body but at the same time you didn't want to because it only meant having to fight this same battle over and over again.

Seeing your friends die before your very eyes in hundreds of thousands of different ways, experiencing each traumatic story to its conclusion. Only to have it all unravel into a reality where none of it happened, but the whiplash makes you doubt this reality too. It's always too good to be true. You feel it in your bones that you don't deserve this. That the way you twist reality is wrong and one day it'll catch up to you in the worst possible way.

You feel water running down your face and remember that you're in the shower. You try to ground yourself and come back to your body. You hear the water splashing, feel the ground beneath your feet, the solid embrace around you.

You try to move but you can't. Finally, you snap fully to your body. Your mind is groggy, feeling like you'd been hit by a truck. But there's the unmistakable warmth surrounding you, dense and as unyielding as brick.

Your face is roughly yanked upwards and you open your eyes.

“Fuck, finally! Are you alright?”

You stare blearily, mouth open and dry from the adrenaline that had been pumping through your body just moments ago.

Bright hazel eyes. Huh. So pretty. You'd never noticed.

You realise you're not supporting your own weight. You're finally aware that Logan has you in an embrace, holding your body up, one hand around your waist and the other on your jaw as he looks into your face. The water on your face isn't from the shower, you realise. It's your tears.

“Bloody hell, please say something,” he says angrily. You feel some of your own anger flare up in response. What's his problem?

“Fuck,” you croak.

You feel his chest vibrate against yours as he laughs, suddenly aware that you're as naked as the day you were born and this man is fully clothed standing in your shower, getting his white singlet wet. Giving you a bear hug…

Your brain short circuits as you try to come up with words, feeling your whole body heat with embarrassment.

“W-what are you doing in here?” you manage to slur.

“Helping your ass,” he says roughly. “Can you stand?”

Fuck, good question. Can I stand??

“C-close your eyes first,” you demand.

“Bit late to be feeling shy now don't you think?” he teases with a wink.

“Just close ‘em!” you yell at him.

He laughs before complying.

You extricate yourself from his arms, turning off the shower, then navigate carefully around him to exit the cubicle. You grab a towel and cover yourself, making a mental note to grab a clean one later since this one was definitely dirty now.

“Okay, open your eyes and get out, please.”

He turns to look at you.

“Don't think that's a good idea, bub.”

“And why is that?” you huff impatiently.

“What if you collapse in the shower again?” he says matter of factly.

“I've been having these things for a long time. I've managed to survive so far so don't stress about it.”

“It's different now though, isn't it? You've been having these for a long time, you said so yourself, and they're only getting worse instead of better.”

You sigh heavily in frustration. You hated that he was right.

“So what exactly are you suggesting?”

Your heart was beating like crazy. He better not suggest what you think he was going to suggest.

“I'm sure old Chuckie boy wouldn't mind lending you his shower chair for the night,” he smirked.

You laughed out loud despite the tension in the room. He always managed to make you laugh.

“Yeah, I'm just going to wake up an old man in the middle of the night to ask if I can borrow his shower chair,” you joked, lightly slapping him on the shoulder.

He laughed along with you then you both shared a few moments of comfortable silence. Only for him to break it with-

“My other suggestion is to shower with me so I can make sure you don't faint and hurt yourself.”

You stared at him distrustfully.

“Hey, look, I'm not being a pervert, it's just the only solution I can think of on the fly,” he placates, hands raised as if to say I'm innocent and unarmed.

“Right…”

You stopped to think for a second, your muddled mind trying to make sense of the situation.

It made you especially uncomfortable that you didn't exactly have your full mental faculties about you.

But Logan was a good friend. You'd fought beside him many times before and you saw that you could trust him. But… he was still a man. A man much bigger and stronger than you.

“Can I trust you?” you asked falteringly. What a stupid idea to ask the opinion of someone fully in power over you.

“I promise I won't do anything without you wanting it. This is entirely your choice.”

You looked him in the eyes, trying to find a trace of falsehood in them. But you only saw honeyed eyes, dripping with conviction. The same conviction you'd seen many times before when he was protecting those he loved.

You felt yourself feel a little calmer.

“Okay… but you better not break your promise. Or I'll sick Charles and his shower chair on you.”

“I won't. I just want to keep you safe,” he said in a low, serious voice.

You felt a fluttering behind your ribs. Fuck… I'm about to shower with this incredibly attractive asshole.

“Okay… you get in first,” you said.

“Yes, ma'am,” he said a little too cheerily.

You turned around to give him privacy to undress. You heard the rustle of his clothes then a thump as he dropped them on the floor of your bathroom.

Should've known he'd be a slob…

You heard the shower turn on and you braced yourself for what was to come next.

You turned towards the shower, keeping your head down and eyes averted. You removed your towel and stepped into the shower, still not looking at Logan and ignoring his presence, which was hard to do in your little shower. Thankfully he was turned away respectfully.

You stood behind him, turned away from his body. You took your soap and began to lather it over yourself as you usually did when you showered.

“Would you like a hand with your back?” Logan spoke up.

You paused as you weighed up the question in your mind.

“Sure,” you said quietly, trying to keep yourself calm.

This is totally normal. We're just friends having a shower. Together.

You turned your back and heard him applying soap to his hands. Slowly, gently, as if you were made of glass, he began to rub your back, starting with your shoulders. You felt yourself give an involuntary shiver.

“Are you cold? Do you need the water a bit hotter?” he asked you.

“No, it's fine. The temperature is okay with you?”

“Yeah, bub, just perfect.”

His hands felt massive against your back. He massaged your neck for a few seconds before moving down your shoulder blades towards your middle back.

“Did-did you want me to do your back too?” you asked, trying to hide how nervous you were.

“Since you're offering, sure,” he said gruffly. You turned towards him at the same moment he turned away from you, unfortunately catching a glimpse of his insane fucking abs, but thankfully managing not to make eye contact.

You soaped up your hands and began with his neck, trying not to notice how thick and muscular his traps were.

God… this is hell but also heaven.

You ran your hands across his ridiculously broad shoulders and down his middle back, avoiding going too low lest you caress his stupid, tight ass.

“I'm going to wash my hair, okay?” you told him, unsure of why you were asking permission.

“Don't know why you're asking my permission.” Fuck. You were being weird. “But I can do the same right?” he responded, holding in laughter.

You felt your face go hot.

“D-do what you want,” you said petulantly.

You took the shampoo bottle, squeezing what you needed for yourself before handing it to him over his shoulder, which he thankfully kept turned to you in respect.

You both washed your hair in silence. You already felt a bit better. You dreamily thought of your bed as you rinsed the shampoo from your hair.

You then grabbed the conditioner and squeezed some into your hand.

“Need the conditioner?” you asked Logan.

“What for?” he asked, confused.

“For your hair, duh.”

“Nah, I'm good. Haven't had to use it so far in my life, won't start now. Need a hand with washing your hair?”

You knew he was trying to be helpful. But it felt so, so wrong. Like overstepping your relationship as friends. But then again… would you ever get the chance again to have an incredibly sexy man wash your hair for you?

“Sure,” you said stiffly.

Silence, then his hand moved around you to grab the bottle from you.

“Ah-” you already had some conditioner in your hand. You were about to tell him but decided to keep quiet as he worked on your hair.

His fingers… so thick and strong yet gentle through your hair, over your scalp. You couldn't help but to close your eyes and enjoy the sensation.

It was over too soon and he stepped away from you again. You tipped your head to rinse your hair, giving your face a quick scrub with water while you were at it; fuck your skin routine, you were going straight to bed.

“I'm going to step out first,” you informed him.

He grunted in reply and you stepped from the shower, grabbing two clean towels from your bathroom cupboard. You covered yourself with one and half turned your body to Logan, gaze still averted from his direction.

“Here ya go,” you tried to say cheerily, offering the towel to him.

“Thanks,” he said and grabbed it from your hand. You quickly moved to the door.

“Wait until I say you can come in,” you said before closing the door behind you.

Fuuuuucccckkkkk.

This was not helping you to relax at all.

You dried yourself quickly and threw your pyjamas on.

“I'm done!” you called through the door.

He stepped out with his towel wrapped around his stupid, slutty waist. You could see his happy trail adorning his abs. His enormous pecs, his dog tags resting in the dip of his gorgeous chest.

“Hey, bub, my eyes are up here,” he teases.

You swallow thickly and glare at his stupid, smirking face.

“Have I ever told you I hate you?” you retort, only succeeding in making him laugh.

“How are you feeling now?” he says softly, suddenly serious.

“I'm… exhausted. I usually sleep a lot after an episode.”

He nods in understanding.

“You'll be okay if I leave?”

This gives you pause. If you were being honest to yourself, you'd say, “Please stay. I don't want to be alone tonight.”

But you weren't honest with yourself.

“Thanks for looking out for me, Logan. I really appreciate it and sorry for putting you out. I'll be okay. You can go to bed now if you want.”

He looked at you in silence. He stepped towards you, so close that you had to look up to keep eye contact. You could feel the warmth radiating from him. Fuck he runs hot.

“You mean it, right? You're okay to be alone?”

You stared at him, a little bit dumbfounded. Was he able to read minds or something?

“Yes, I'll be fine. I'll be in bed so I can't exactly fall,” you chuckled.

He didn't laugh with you. Only watched you carefully.

“Okay. I'll respect what you say you want,” he says carefully.

Again, this is so out of character for him that you second guess yourself whether you're in reality or not.

You watch as he turns to the bathroom and grabs his clothes from the floor then goes towards the door to the hall.

“Hey-w-wait-y-you're not going out like that are you?” you stutter in disbelief.

He turns back to you.

“What else am I going to do?” he asks incredulously.

Clueless.

“Put your clothes back on,” you retort.

“Ew, you're a bit of a slob, aren't you? They're dirty and covered with blood and who knows what or who else.”

You deadpanned.

“What if… what if you stayed here for the night?” you blurted out without thinking. You flinch at your own words.

Logan pauses with his hand on the door knob.

“I don't exactly have my pyjamas here with me,” he says slowly.

“I've already seen and touched you naked. What's the difference?” you hear yourself say.

What the fuck am I saying?

“I-I mean, surely I have something that can fit you,” you amend quickly. His face seems to go slack in surprise.

“Wow. You really want it, huh?” he smirks at you.

You ignore the heat that overtakes your whole body.

“N-never mind! Fuck off already,” you say sourly.

“Hey, I'm just joking,” he laughs. “I can definitely stay if it helps you feel better.” He smiles at you and you feel yourself melt a little bit.

“It… it would. Help me feel better, I mean.”

Having him near you would help remind you that this is real, you justify.

“Alright then,” he nods to you. “Some clothes would be great.”

“Ah, sure, give me a second.”

You quickly go to your wardrobe to locate the loosest pair of pants you own. He'll just have to sleep shirtless, there's no way you have a top that will fit over his broad shoulders.

You find a dark grey pair of trackies and turn back to him.

“Try these.”

“Thanks,” he says as he takes it from your hand.

As he moves back to the bathroom you jump into bed to wait. Your bed never felt so fucking good.

You've barely settled under the covers when Logan reappears from the bathroom, his hair still wet and dripping down his neck. You do your best not to stare.

He moves towards you and lifts the covers to slip into bed with you.

This is just a sleepover, you tell yourself. Like when you have a friend over for the night.

Logan slots himself into your bed alongside you and you become suddenly aware of how small your double bed is. The frame creaks loudly from the weight of him and his Adamantium bones.

“Comfy?” you ask.

He turns in the bed so he's facing you. A smile slowly makes its way to his face and you find you can't breathe for a second.

“Yeah, definitely,” he murmurs.

“Alright, sweet, g’night then,” you say quickly, turning away from him to still your beating heart. Fuck, I hope he can't hear my heart right now.

“Are you sure you're ready to sleep? Your heart is beating pretty fast,” he points out cooly.

Mother fucker.

“So… you have heightened senses right? Kind of.. like a dog?” I'm not thinking straight, why am I trying to piss him off?

“Thought you were going to sleep,” he grunted. The sound of his gravelly voice did something to you. But you ignored it.

“It just kind of reminds me of those service dogs, y'know the ones that can sense when their owner is going to have a seizure? I mean, I know I don't have seizures exactly, but I guess it presents sort of like one.”

“What are you trying to say?” he asks gruffly. He doesn't like it when people compare him to dogs. You're just grateful you can't see the look on his face right now.

“I'm just wondering how you can tell? What is it exactly that you're sensing? It's always interested me,” you say honestly.

He grunts again and goes quiet before answering.

“I can smell it. Can't even explain what it actually smells like. But that's how I know, although it isn't always accurate.”

“That's really interesting.” And you mean it. It really is interesting… although the implications concerning his sense of smell have you a little bit paranoid…

“So that's why I'm telling you to listen to me when I fucking tell you to stop with your powers. You could've killed yourself tonight,” he grinds out, anger in his voice.

“Logan… you need to understand where I'm coming from. You all died tonight. Like literally, right before my very eyes, you were all dead. What do you expect me to do?”

You feel tears pricking your eyes, the lump in your throat is choking you.

“I… I can't talk about this right now okay?” you tell him, trying to keep your voice steady.

“Okay… okay, I'm sorry,” his voice softens. “Please, just get some sleep, okay? Guide dog’s orders.”

And just like that you're laughing again, feeling a tear running down your cheek to your pillow. You were so grateful to have him in your life. You were also grateful he couldn't see you crying right now.

“Alright, g'night, puppy,” you tease.

“‘Night,” he says softly.

A minute passes and you can already feel yourself starting to drift off. You smile to yourself, knowing that you have your own personal “service animal” to keep you safe tonight.

#logan howlett #logan howlett imagine #wolverine x reader #logan howlett x reader #wolverine imagine #wolverine #Logan being cute and worried and caring uwu #I saw dp and wolverine and fell in love dont know why it took me seeing his hairy 55 year old abs for this to happen #I never crushed on this man during xmen but idk he fucking got to me in that movie ok #i stan a guilt ridden man with low self esteem put your penis inside me right now #ass writes stuff

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suzukiblu · 4 months ago

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Thank-you sentences for derpsheep behind the cut; weird amnesia Timberkon. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

“You can recognize their heartbeats?” Bernard asks incredulously–that is a very creepy and invasive thing to recognize about someone, much less be passively listening to, what the fuck–and then frowns. “Wait, got back from where?”

“Long story,” Superboy mutters. “Alternate realities were involved. It sucked. But I got back here, and it’s supposed to be right, and there’s people I recognize, but there’s . . . different people, too. And no one here recognizes me. And I thought . . .”

“That you were either totally insane or just stranded in the wrong reality for no discernable reason with no idea how to find the right one?” Bernard assumes.

“That, yeah,” Superboy says tightly. “Definitely that.”

“Good news, I guess, if you are insane, it’s a shared delusion, and if you’re in the wrong reality, so am I,” Bernard says. “Because again, I definitely remember you. And Hawaii. And Superman being dead. And like, all that shit in general. Also you kinda died that one time too? There was a statue, I’m pretty sure. Actually I think there were two.”

Superboy’s smile is tight and humorless, and he digs his fingers into the inside of his wrist. Bernard has no clue how a dude in such severe and obvious distress can look so fucking good about, like . . . literally everything he’s got going on over there. It’s a lot of “everything”, is all. Superboy is a lot no matter what, obviously, but still. Like, extra a lot. Secret bonus levels of a lot.

A lot.

“I mean, there used to be,” Superboy says, and the pained smile he’s wearing turns–bitter, kind of.

Fuck, Bernard feels so bad for this dude. Like so many levels of so bad.

“Don’t take this the wrong way but I need to google some shit,” he says as he digs his phone out. Tim is clearly taking his sweet-ass time in the bathroom, and since he isn’t actually in there waiting for Superboy, it’s gotta be a Bat thing, which usually gives him a good fifteen or twenty minutes of fuck-around time before Tim makes it back with the weak excuse du jour. Or, like, three and a half weeks, one very memorable and kinda fucking awful time that Bernard had spent wondering if jumping into the timestream was how vigilantes ghosted you. “And maybe check some forums or something.”

“I don’t think ‘is this weird dude at the boba shop crazy’ is gonna pop up on Bing, man,” Superboy says, still wearing the same bitter smile. Bernard wonders why he didn’t just go to the Justice League and explain himself to them. Like, they’d probably believe him, right? Or at least they wouldn’t instantly not believe him; they’d check things out or whatever.

Alternately, though: half-Kryptonian full-telekinetic with Lex Luthor’s DNA and Superman’s face who doesn’t even know if he’s crazy or not.

So like . . . that seems like an awkward conversation to have with Superman, maybe, Bernard allows. Or just fucking agonizing and terrifying and wildly, wildly likely to end in one of those stupid misunderstanding-based super-fights and, like, maybe also getting drop-kicked into the Phantom Zone because said stupid fight would be against Superman and that is, apparently, what Superman usually does with supervillain Kryptonians. And probably Superboy is having some very understandable issues about getting drop-kicked out of reality right now, if that’s a concern he’s had. Which–the Phantom Zone isn’t the same thing as an alternate reality, as far as Bernard’s aware, but also what the fuck does he know about the Phantom Zone?

Bernard googles, in quick succession: Superman’s death, the Phantom Zone, and Superboy. He gets a ton of articles and photographs and blog posts with absolutely zero trace of Superboy in a single one of them, a lot of contradicting intel about what the hell the Phantom Zone actually is, and also some blurry candid photos of a ten year-old in ripped jeans and an S-shield hoodie that he’s never seen before in his life.

. . . so that’s weird, yeah, Bernard observes, blinking down at his phone.

“Huh,” he says, brow furrowing. “Hey, should I know this kid?”

“Did you literally just google ‘Superboy’?” Superboy asks, which is notably not an answer to Bernard’s question.

“Obviously, yeah, the entire internet is in my pocket, why would I not do that,” Bernard replies reasonably, still scrolling through random photos of this completely unrecognizable kid. Said kid continues to look like a total fucking stranger and Bernard continues to have zero clue who he is or why he’s wearing the “S”. Another clone, maybe? Like, an even mini-er mini-Super? Bernard can’t see his face all that clearly in any of the pics, still, but he’s at least got Superman’s coloring, it looks like.

“Because Tim would give you shit about it, probably, I don’t know,” Superboy lies, because he very obviously does know. Probably better than Bernard does himself, come to think of it, which is kind of a weird thought but also, like, an obviously objectively true one. Superboy’s spent a lot more time with Tim than he has, even having been, like . . . unrealitied and all.

God, that is still so disturbing a concept, too.

#timberkon #bernard dowd #kon el #conner kent #superboy #wip: weird amnesia timberkon #derpsheep

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spnscripthunt-inactive · 10 months ago

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The Supernatural Script Hunt came from humble origins, a handful of fans banding together to collect and preserve our fandom history, making as many scripts as possible accessible to fans worldwide. Since acquiring our first script over five years ago, and then branching out to involve so many fans supporting the work in the years since, it was always our intent to give it all back, and then some.

When we began this project, the fandom collectively had six scripts from five episodes and a single network outline. In the five years since we bought our first script to add to that collection, we are ending the project with a total of 163 scripts from 147 episodes, casting sides from 50+ episodes, 50+ call sheets, arenas from 18 episodes, and other related documents. A complete list of items in our collection is on the SupernaturalWiki, for a closer look, click here.

The time has come for us to offer everyone a final chance to own their very own priceless souvenir of the show and cast we all love so dearly. In doing so, we also want to honor the largest (hopefully!) legacy of our fandom: using our collective power for good. Which is why we're offering up some very special scripts (and a few other items!) in our collection in a raffle to benefit Undue Medical Debt.

Our initial goal was to raise at least $10,000 so we can erase at least one million dollars in medical debt. We've met that goal, our stretch goal is to get to $20,000 so we can erase at least two million dollars in medical debt.

How Undue Medical Debt Works:

You make a donation. They use data analytics to pinpoint the debt of those most in need: households that earn less than 4x the federal poverty level or whose debts are 5% or more of annual income.

Undue Medical Debt buys medical debt at a steep discount. They buy debt in bundles, millions of dollars at a time at a fraction of the original cost. This means your donation relieves about 100x its value in medical debt.

Together we wipe out medical debt. People across the country receive letters that their debt has been erased. They have no tax consequences or penalties to consider. Just like that, they're free of medical debt.

For every $10 you donate to Undue Medical Debt, you will 1) be erasing about $1,000 in medical debt and 2) be able to enter our raffle to win one of the items listed below.

Our Campaign Page

Our Raffle Site

Donated by Eric Kripke:

'Pilot' - "Original pilot that got tossed out -- whole different story -- enjoy this alternative reality Sam and Dean." Signed by Eric Kripke, Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, and Samantha Smith.

2.22 'All Hell Breaks Loose: Part 2' - Yellow Revisions. Signed by Eric Kripke, Jensen Ackles, and Jared Padalecki.

3.16 'No Rest for the Wicked' - Goldenrod Revisions. Signed by Eric Kripke, Jensen Ackles, and Jared Padalecki.

4.01 'Lazarus Rising' - Pink Revisions. Signed by Eric Kripke, Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, and Misha Collins.

4.22 'Lucifer Rising' - Production Draft. "My director's copy - rare! Enjoy!" Signed by Eric Kripke, Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, and Rob Benedict.

5.01 'Sympathy for the Devil' - Pink Revisions. Signed by Eric Kripke, Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, and Rob Benedict.

6.22 'The Man Who Knew Too Much' - Production Draft. Signed by Eric Kripke, Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, and Mark Sheppard.

Donated by James Stoteraux and Chad Fiveash:

Gotham Knights - 'Pilot' - Double Yellow Revisions. Signed by Misha Collins, Oscar Morgan, Olivia Rose Keegan, Navia Robinson, Fallon Smythe, Tyler DiChiara, Anna Lore, Rahart Adams, Chad Fiveash, and James Stoteraux.

Gotham Knights - 1.13 'Night of the Owls' - Production Draft. Signed by Misha Collins, Oscar Morgan, Olivia Rose Keegan, Navia Robinson, Fallon Smythe, Tyler DiChiara, Anna Lore, Rahart Adams, Chad Fiveash, and James Stoteraux.

Donated by Natalie Abrams:

Gotham Knights - 1.11 'Daddy Issues' - signed by show creator/episode co-writer Natalie Abrams, director America Young, and Misha Collins (Harvey Dent/Two-Face). Two copies donated, two winners. Thank you @deanismybuddy (twitter) for making this happen.

Donated by Jennifer May Nickel:

Signed Gotham Knights costume sketches (8.5" x 11" prints), four winners.

1.08 Harvey Dent tux

Rebecca's 1.13 dress

Duela's 1.09 grenade costume

Carrie/Robin's super suit look

Donated by Robbie Thompson:

The Winchesters - 1.01 'Pilot' - Final Shooting Script - signed by Robbie Thompson and Jensen Ackles.

The Winchesters - 1.13 'Hey, That's No Way to Say Goodbye' - signed by Robbie Thompson and Jensen Ackles.

Thank you to @SadieWit (twitter) and Gabe Garza for making this happen.

Scripts Not Donated by Creators:

3.15 'Time is on My Side' - Production Draft signed by Jim Beaver at Creation Tour: Burbank 2024; Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki at Jus in Bello 14; Steven Williams at Crossroads 8.

14.14 Ouroboros - Production Draft - donated by @_ninalynne_ (twitter).

Gotham Knights - 'Pilot' - Pre-Production Draft signed by Misha Collins at Creation Tour: Burbank 2024.

Walker - 'Pilot Script' - signed by Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles, and Richard Speight Jr. at Jus in Bello 14.

Walker: Independence - 'Pilot Script' - Revised Network Draft - signed by Jared Padalecki at Jus in Bello 14; Mark Sheppard at Crossroads 8.

The Winchesters - 'Pilot' - 4th Network Draft signed by Jensen Ackles at Creation Tour: Burbank 2024; Richard Speight Jr. and Rob Benedict at Jus in Bello 14; Jim Beaver and Alexander Calvert at Crossroads 8.

Audio/Visual:

Supernatural: The Complete Series Blu-ray - donated by @HanmeiCui (twitter)

Dick Jr. and the Volunteers' "Fistfights and Hug-Outs" CD - signed by Richard Speight Jr. at Jus in Bello 14, donated by @Julie_Fleming and @EmilieDK87 (twitter)

Rob Benedict "Leave The Light On" CD - signed by Rob Benedict at Jus in Bello 14, donated by @merenwen76AO3 (twitter).

"Saturday Night Special" CD - signed by Louden Swain at Creation Tour: New Jersey 2024.

Autographed Photos and Posters:

Crossroads 8 "Supernatural" cast poster (A3 size) signed by Misha Collins, Mark Sheppard, Julian Richings, Alexander Calvert, Jim Beaver, Rob Benedict, Steven Williams, Corin Nemic, Todd Stashwick, and Cindy Sampson. Donated by @AilesduSoleil (twitter).

Crossroads 8 "The Boys" cast poster (A3) signed by Tomer Capone and Karen Fukuhara.

Autographed photos from Crossroads 8 donated by @AilesduSoleil, @Julie_Fleming, @PurpleNurpleSPN (twitter):

Rob Benedict, Alexander Calvert, Tomer Capone, Misha Collins, Karen Fukuhara, Corin Nemec, Cindy Sampson (multiple winners)

Books:

Hardcover edition of Good Omens - signed by Neil Gaiman and Mark Sheppard. Thank you to the staff at The Golden Notebook in Woodstock, NY for being extremely helpful and kind.

Hardcover edition of Death (2022) - written by Neil Gaiman, art by Mike Dringenberg, John Totleben, Mark Buckingham, and Chris Bachalo. Signed by Lisa Berry.

Family Don't End with Blood - signed by Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles, Misha Collins, and Jim Beaver, donated by @FangasmSPN (twitter).

There'll Be Peace When You are Done - signed by Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles, Misha Collins, Alexander Calvert, and Sebastian Roche, donated by @FangasmSPN (twitter).

Supernatural 15 Seasons: The Crew Member's Souvenir - two copies, two winners. Donated by @HanmeiCui (twitter) and [anon].

Fan Arts and Crafts:

"To Be Continued" t-shirt made and donated by @shitannamakes (twitter), signed by Jensen Ackles at Creation Tour: Burbank 2024.

The Winchesters canvas print (16 x 22.7 in) designed by BobbysIdjit (tumblr, Redbubble) and signed by Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, and Richard Speight Jr. Donated by Denim-wrapped Nightmares, a Supernatural Podcast.

Curse boxes made and donated by @TheGreenCooler (twitter):

6" x 4" x 4" - red and white

8.5" x 6" x 5" - brown and black

Supernatural and AKF themed decorative pillar candles made and donated by @TheGreenCooler (twitter):

4x3 inch short decorative pillar candles set: "Sam and Dean initials"

5x3 inch decorative candle: #AlwaysKeepFighting "Good morning Starshine. You're still here today."

5x3 inch decorative candle: #AlwaysKeepFighting "Hopeful Daisy"

5x3 inch decorative candle: "Men of Letters"

5x3 inch decorative candle: "Carry On Wayward Son"

5x3 inch decorative candle: "We Are Home"

6 x 4 decorative candle: "Impala on a Hunt" (pic 1) (pic 2) (pic 3)

Rare Actor-Specific Items

AFK pin designed by Phil Sgriccia in 2015 for Jared Padalecki, "only Jared had these pins unless he gave them to you" - donated by @slammtam (twitter)

Jared Padalecki autograph at Creation Austin, donated by @KLFSPNcons off her Gold badge (Row I).

Raffle closes on Sunday, June 30 at 11:59pm (EST). Winners will be drawn by a random number generator, we will submit the names to Undue Medical Debt's development staff to confirm the donations match the caps submitted to us on the Google Form, and we'll contact winners by Saturday, July 6 2024. Winners will have 72 hours to respond, and will be required to provide their physical mailing address and to cover the cost of shipping (for scripts it's currently $9.85 for priority mail insured inside the US, international rates and non-script rates to be determined as necessary).

PLEASE NOTE: IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 YEARS OF AGE AND WISH TO DONATE, PLEASE ENSURE YOU HAVE PRIOR AUTHORIZATION FROM CREDIT/ACCOUNT HOLDER.

As Castiel once told a patron of the Gas N Sip buying a lottery ticket, good luck!

Thank you to our con helpers, we never could have pulled this off without your help: abeautifulswan, AilesduSoleil, deanismybuddy, EmilieDK87, FangasmSPN, HanmeiCui, jennysun23, Julie_Fleming, KLFSPNcons, kreespa, kaurie_mac, marywinchstr, merenwen76AO3, MiaAW90, MysterioAmber, PurpleNurpleSPN, RMelton76, rowwyaboat, SDeeg13, shandataber, SuperWiki, zerbehunter

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highdefhoetry · 11 days ago

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interrogation.

disclaimer: although this is mostly fluff, the author is an adult & this is their kink. minors dni, do not like, do not reblog, do not follow.

cw: tickling, playful interrogation, verbal teasing, slight yandere/overprotective vibes because caleb is caleb

Thump. Thump. Thump.

Your heartbeat quickens as he stares down at you with a gentle, yet eerie smile. You shift in place, rustling the bed sheets beneath you as you try to break free of the hands pinning your wrists down. Despite your best efforts, there’s little you can do now to escape. Caleb has always been stronger than you, and now he’s got you trapped, he won’t let you go so easily.

“So, pipsqueak,” he leers down at you, smirking. “You gonna tell me where you were last night?”

You pout and shake your head, earning a small chuckle from your childhood friend.

“Not budgin’, eh? That’s alright. I have ways of making you talk.”

His playful tone makes it hard to take him seriously. But when his free hand drifts to your side, right above the curve of your waist, a strike of terror shoots through you as the implications of his words finally sink in.

No! Not again! Anything but that!

“Begging already?” he scoffs, his amethyst eyes focused on yours. “But I haven’t even started my interrogation yet.”

Long fingers wrap themselves around your ribcage, tapping them gently and causing you to jump slightly. He’s barely touching you, but it’s the anticipation of what’s to come that makes you squirm. His cocky smirk grows as he watches the panic overtake you.

Isn’t this what always happened? Childhood memories flash through your mind, scenes that played out countless times when you were kids.

“Heeeey, did you eat the rest of grandma’s cookies?!”

“Where’s my black hoodie? Did you take it again?”

“You better give back the missing parts of my model plane, or else!”

Caleb would pin you down, ask a seemingly innocent question about something silly, then tickle you until you came clean with the truth. Back then, it was one of your favorite games to play with him. Sometimes, you’d be extra troublesome on purpose just to get him to do this to you. Other times you did it just to get his attention. He always played along with it back then, so it was no surprise that he was playing along with it now.

“If I remember correctly… your ribs are pretty ticklish.”

Caleb’s voice brings you back to reality, along with light clawing of your ribs. You howl with laughter and try to twist away, but are unable to break free of his grasp. He alternates between poking, prodding, and pinching, all of which make you giggle wildly. His face lights up with amusement as he watches you struggle.

“Aha! I was right. You always went crazy when I did this to you. Now, what about your underarms? Are they still super ticklish, too?”

His hand suddenly climbs upwards, scribbling the sensitive area that is your armpit. He laughs when you let out a loud shriek and stays there for a few seconds longer than you can handle, enjoying the pitiful little sounds he’s eliciting from your lips.

“Oh, man, this must reeeeeally suck for you. You know, this will all end if you just tell me what I wanna know.”

You splutter out something provocative that’s somewhere between a “fuck you!” and a cackle, which only spurs him on more. His nails tickle a path from your bicep back down to your pit, then back up again until you feel like you’re losing your mind. All while his voice coos in your ear, whispering playful threats with a gentle breath that tickles you even more. You can barely get out a word now, you’re practically screaming.

He stops for a moment and lets you catch your breath. You’re totally worn out and weak from all the struggling, so trying to break free is useless. But your few seconds of mercy ends quickly as his interrogation continues.

“You ready to talk now, pipsqueak?” he grins. “Or am I gonna have to get a little meaner?”

He doesn’t wait for you to respond. You feel his long fingers brush across your stomach, circling your belly button. Your giggles reignite, although they’re a bit more subdued since he’s taken a lighter approach. His nails trace your skin in random patterns, barely grazing you yet eliciting flurries of giggles with every touch. He hits a particularly sensitive patch of skin on your lower belly and lingers there for a bit, savoring the way you squeeze your eyes shut and bite your lip.

“If I knew any better, I’d say you were enjoying this,” he teases, slipping a finger into your navel. You arch your back and squeal, and he laughs at your expense.

“Yeah, you definitely are. Looks like I gotta up the ante a little bit.”

His light caresses turn to purposeful strokes, quickening in pace as he tickles every part of you he can reach. The way he moves from one spot to another is so fast you can’t brace yourself and end up shrieking each time he switches things up. The worst comes when he squeezes your hips, with his thumb in your thigh crease and the rest of his fingers digging into your plump skin. The squeal that escapes is so loud that it’s downright embarrassing.

“Aw, is this the spot? Riiiight… here?”

He tickles that damn spot over and over again, never slowing down, never granting mercy. Your begging is renewed, and you’re unable to hold out any longer. You finally relent and tell him that you’ll talk, that you’ll tell him anything, just please stop! You can’t take it anymore!

“Alright then,” he clamps his hand on the top of your thigh and gives it several firm squeezes. “Talk.”

You try your best to answer him through your frantic laughter, but you can’t get the words out with the way he’s kneading into you.

“Hmm? What was that? Sorry, can’t hear you through all this noise.”

Asshole! You try to hurl insults at him, but your words turn into incoherent babbling. He torments you like this for a while longer, then finally lets up and gives you some respite. Breathlessly, you explain your whereabouts the night before in detail, knowing he’d probe you for them if you kept things too vague. You leave no room for further questions, desperate for release. When you’re finished, you lay there with bated breath praying that he’ll accept it. Then finally, after a few seconds of deliberation, he lets go of your wrists and gazes down at you with pure affection in his eyes.

“Really? That’s all? And here I thought you were out doing something you weren’t supposed to. Why didn’t you just tell me, pipsqueak?”

He smiles wide, cupping your cheek for a moment before tickling under your chin. You laugh and smack his hand away, and he responds by ruffling your already messy hair.

“Still just as bratty as ever. Listen, if you want my attention that badly, just ask. I’m always happy to oblige.”

He flicks your nose with his finger, then flashes a smile at you. A warm, familiar that you have always loved, and always will.

#tickling #caleb lads #caleb x reader #lee!reader #ler!caleb #dividers by cafekitsune

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sepublic · 1 year ago

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Interesting that pop culture portrays Van Helsing as an experienced, seasoned vampire hunter, when it's pretty clear in the novel that this is his first go around with the whole thing, his first confirmation they actually exist, and in other words he's basically winging it and hasn't necessarily thrown a punch in his entire life (Which means he can’t just throw hands with Dracula, he needs research and backup to organize the perfect trap where they won’t be instantly killed). VH doesn’t always know what’s going on, he’s figuring things as he goes along; Like yeah he's HEARD of vampires, but it's never been anything prominent to him.

If anything, his past with vampires is probably similar to a lot of readers; Familiar with the concept, knows some of the details but not all of them, and definitely presumes them fake. He sees something going on with his patient and is like Haha damn that's just like a vampire, wouldn't it be crazy if... And then he slowly starts settling into conspiracy theory mode when more and more dots show up to conveniently connect, as he does the obligatory Protagonist Searching Stuff Up bit and realizes Mein Gott!!! It might be a vampire!!!

But then at the last second VH reminds himself, Now hold on, have I actually SEEN this vampire??? But it won't do anyone harm if I added some garlic flowers, right...? And then it just gradually escalates from there into full-on paranoia and dread that vampires exist and VH needs to desecrate the dead, and then he finally gets confirmation when he sees an Undead Lucy. What the fuck.

I think there's an argument to be made that Van Helsing was doubting himself just as much as Seward and the others initially did, if not more so, and he can’t even talk to anyone about it; So there’s an elation where you finally talk to others and realize it’s really happening, you’re not crazy.

This just ties into the theme of recording that which you did see, which is indisputable, because it’s evidence and proof. So you can be certain you aren't totally insane, and can distinguish facts from assumptions and theories if necessary; Especially when one needs to consider other explanations for the same symptoms. There’s a relief confirming what is and isn’t real to dispel self-doubt, like there was for Jonathan, who also suffered from Dracula’s gaslighting distorting his perception of reality.

I think all of this makes Van Helsing's actions and secrecy a lot more understandable when handling Lucy; If you hired a doctor and he suddenly started bringing up vampires, you might be inclined to think he's insane, doesn't know what he's talking about, and has read too many vampire stories and probably believes in 'alternative' medicine. Van Helsing still has an image and reputation to uphold here, and if it's gone, he can't actually be there to help Lucy if he turns out to be right.

That isn't to say he isn't without critique, especially in later portions of the novel, but you can kinda see where this underdog stance of "I'm right and the others around me are wrong" gets vindicated and thus develops into a bit of arrogance later down the line; Particularly, in presuming his disagreements with Mina to be no different than his secrecy with Seward and Mrs. Westenra.

In the end, VH could be described as a character who wonders if he's in the novel Dracula (compared to Jonathan who knows he's in a horror story of some kind but can't name the genre), but then has to remind himself this is reality... If this is a story, it’s probably just some medical drama. And when VH does accept he's in the novel Dracula, he assumes his character development and the lessons he learns are straightforward.

#dracula #dracula daily #van helsing

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teencopandthesourwolf · 1 year ago

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LOVE YEW

on ao3 HERE

“Here!”

Stiles slams something down on the coffee table to the left of Derek's (Stiles's) laptop.

Derek is searching online, only a little psychotically, in the hope of finding a store that sells these very specific organic coffee beans he tried in a hipster coffee house recently. Derek isn't a hipster—he isn't—he just likes nice coffee, is all. Really, he should have asked the barista to find out not just the brand name but their supplier's address too because this is driving him insane. Maybe he is insane? More likely just incredibly shit at the internet, but he thinks he'd prefer to plead insanity if challenged.

Derek unknits his eyebrows and looks down at… a green thing. It's sort of feather shaped and has many spindles with bronzed edges.

It's a leaf.

His eyebrows knit themselves back together as he blinks down at the thing a couple of times.

“It's a leaf,” he says, because he doesn't know what else he's supposed to say.

Then he looks up—and back and forth at Stiles who is now pacing the apartment and alternating between clicking his fingers and flicking his thumbs and shaking his arms out at the sides of his body; his stimming can get pretty extra when he's anxious.

Derek's frown deepens with immediate concern. He must've really been deep in it with the infuriating Google searching to not have noticed the smell of Stiles's distress when his mate first arrived home.

“Hey, what's—”

“Yes, Derek, it's a leaf. It is a leaf that I brought all the way home. For you. From the cemetery.”

He's still pacing.

“Okay, well do you want to tell me—“

“It's an Apology Leaf. Obviously.”

Obviously.

“And, Derek, do not laugh, because—"

“I won't but could you just—“

“—this isn't funny. I'm ridiculous, I know, and I know that that's funny. But this? This is decidedly deeply unfunny, alright? This is totally not at all funny, Derek. It's like, a thing without one tiny ounce of humour in it, as in not the slightest bit funny in a gazillion sombre years. Do you hear me?” He inhales deeply, holds the breath, then blows it out harshly via puffed-out cheeks as he clicks and flails some more.

Derek hears Stiles and is of course prepared to wait for him to explain whatever this is, because Derek would wait for Stiles until the end of time, if he had to. Although that's not likely a thing to happen in any reality as this is Stiles who can't go for longer than fifteen seconds without talking. But still, Derek thinks it's the sentiment that counts.

“You, Derek Hale, are good, and someone as good as you deserves somebody far, far better than a ratbag like me. Hence the leaf,” Stiles now tells him in a rush of even more confusing words, his chemo-signals tinged with shame for some worrying reason Derek is yet to discern.

Stiles glances over anxiously from his place of animated, mysterious penance—and then looks away again just as quickly while still trying to wear footprints into the recently painted varnish on the wooden floor of their new apartment.

Derek is clueless as to the cause of Stiles's meltdown, but neither things are a first. Stiles struggles sometimes—just like Derek does, who has plenty of his own outbursts (albeit more moody than vocal) that Stiles has to Private Dick his way through.

Derek is also trying his best not to worry too much about thinking that this is somehow his fault, so now sets his mind on attempting to marry these seemingly unrelated things in his head.

He thinks about the facts he's been presented with:

What is, at an educated guess, a Pacific Yew leaf.

and

Stiles's rather unhinged and self-deprecating dig at himself-slash-compliment for Derek.

...Yeah, no, he's not getting better at this game any time soon.

“Uh,” he says helpfully, and Stiles rolls his eyes in that Do I really have to do everything myself around here? way of his which, rude.

Good job Derek loves the kook.

“It was just sitting there, on top of my mom's gravestone when I got there,” Stiles says quietly, incredulously, gesturing at the innocuous leaf.

Then he's off again with the pacing.

“And I knew, straight away, I knew,” he says, getting louder again and laughing in this accusatory sort of way, pointing somewhere into the ether, eyes manic.

Derek scratches his nose. He hopes he will soon know, too, because honestly, he's kind of blindfolded in the dark here.

“She was obviously telling me what a dipshit I was! What a douche I am! A massive ass-hat! Total loser!”

“I mean, that's mostly fair, but maybe total loser is a little strong.” Derek will often speak Stiles's language when Stiles is freaking out, using humour to try and ground him.

Stiles carries on as if Derek hadn’t said anything.

“And I was like, Come on, mom, give me a break, will you? and she was like Seriously, Mischief? You really wouldn't let the special person in your life, your special little guy—”

“You can just say boyfriend, Stiles.”

“—come with you to the cemetery to visit me? Like, as if with that leaf she was reminding me that you are the one person who actually gets this shit, which, I do know. Of fucking course I know. And then—get this—I swear to God, Derek, I felt her literally slapping me upside the head! No fucking word of a lie, man. Like, thousands wouldn't believe me. Millions. They'd say that it must have been the wind or my incredibly vivid imagination. But I know, Der. I know that it was her,” Stiles continues with the confession without stopping for breath.

Derek has thought it before and he'll think it again: the kid's lung capacity is seriously impressive.

“And I also know that I totally should've said yes when you asked me if I wanted you to come with me to the cemetery this morning. Because the thing is, I did want you to. I really, really did. But I just… I just…”

Stiles starts slapping himself on the forehead with both his hands and Derek has had enough of that already. He gets up off the sofa and walks over to Stiles, catching those slim wrists in his grip, gentle yet firm.

“Please don't,” Derek says, imploring Stiles to stop. Derek can understand frustration, but can't stand Stiles hurting himself.

Stiles deflates a little. He then takes a step towards Derek and leans in, resting his forehead against Derek's, their noses lining up like penguins.

“I just—I should have said yes to you when you asked because I honestly, truthfully wanted you there. It's just that I've only ever been there with my Dad. And even then, not as many times as you might think. Not even Scotty has been there with me. It's just a place—it's usually something I do alone. You know?” Stiles' front teeth worry at his pretty lip.

And yes, Derek does know.

So he says, “Because you feel guilt, right? Even though there isn't a thing in this universe or any other that you should feel guilty about.”

Guilt just for being alive.

Slightly cross-eyed with the proximity and angle, Stiles looks at Derek in a way that says he knows just how much Derek knows about this stuff.

“Yeah. Yes, exactly. And I guess I didn't know how to be that with somebody else around.”

“But Stiles, that's completely—”

“No, Der. It isn't, actually. Because you're not just somebody else. It's you. And I'm in love with you.” Stiles finally takes a breath while Derek's heart is busy swelling to twice it's size. He will never tire of hearing Stiles Stilinski say those words to him. “And I absolutely should've trusted in that. In us.”

It is, of course, completely fine that Stiles went to the cemetery alone to visit his mother, but Derek also gets where the kid is coming from. He too takes a breath, now, a big one, because this kind of stuff doesn't come as easily for him as it does Stiles.

He swallows his nerves and pushes on.

“I love you, Stiles. And it's alright that we're not perfect. Neither of us are. Us—you and me—we're both just… Finding our way.”

After a moment, Stiles adds, “Together.”

They smile at each other like huge dorks.

“Yeah.” Derek breathes, and his heart might just burst.

Derek scents Stiles, and Stiles breathes deeply too, now. “Thanks,” he says, then Derek kisses him, just as deep and for a long while, because it's his favourite thing to do in the whole damn world.

Eventually Derek pulls back, runs a thumb over Stiles's mouth and says, “You know what?”

Stiles's brow lifts inquisitively.

Derek lets go of Stiles's wrist and takes his hand instead, leading him back to the sofa and sitting them both down squarely by the coffee table where he had been sat fruitlessly Googling not so long ago.

“I believe you,” Derek says.

Stiles frowns. “Huh?” It's his turn to be confused.

“Millions wouldn't, but I believe you, Stiles. About your mom.”

He reaches across and picks up the Apology Leaf, cradling it for a brief moment in his palm before nudging at Stiles's hand and urging him to take it, which he does.

Derek then grabs the laptop, side-eyeing his previous Google search—WHO NEAR ME SELLS PHOENIX ROAST ORGANIC COFFEE BEANS THAT TASTE LIKE HOME—and forcing himself not to get instantly sucked back into that particularly vexing nightmare, while also trying his best to angle the screen away from Stiles who, if he saw, would fall off the sofa laughing at Derek's admittedly pathetic research skills.

Not everybody is a… Technophile? Cyberpunk? Derek has no fucking clue about any of this shit.

With Stiles now passing comment on the aesthetic qualities of the Apology Leaf, Derek uses both index fingers to tap out the words of the thing he wants to look up, taking no notice of Stiles who is trying his annoying not-very-best to smirk at Derek's sorry efforts in Derek's periphery. Clicking through a few different links, this time Derek manages to find what he's after without any trouble, amazingly. He then hands the laptop over to Stiles, who carefully places the leaf down on the arm of the sofa beside him before fully taking the computer from Derek.

Stiles purses those pretty lips of his as he scans the information on screen, squinting a little.

“Uh, well yeah. It's like you said, Der; It's a leaf. From a Yew, according to this.”

Derek rolls his eyes. “Your mother's ghost is infinitely more clever than you.” Stiles's squint deepens further. “Stiles, she is absolutely spot on about this. Just—scroll down the page a bit, dumbass,” and he ducks his head and smiles, seeing as accusing Stiles of Internet-related Dumbassery is really fucking funny because, irony.

Stiles tuts but does as he's told.

Derek gives him a minute to read the passage on the website he found. It says:

The Yew tree can live for many, many years. It has deep connections with magic and the universe. It was regarded as the protector of the soul by the ancient Greeks. You’ll find this tree planted at many burial sites throughout the world as it’s recognized as a guardian of the dead.

It is believed that Odin (from the Nordic legend) hung himself from the Yew for nine days and nights. It’s symbolic of its everlasting and regenerative properties and is often associated with transformation and change after a difficult time. The Celtic tradition honours the Yew tree for symbolising death and rebirth.

Stiles is smiling this gorgeous, open smile by the time he's finished reading, and Derek makes an unrealistic wish to be able to keep it there forever.

“So, you were right,” Derek says, “when you said that she knew. You were just a little mixed up about what, is all.” Derek takes another deep breath. “What your mom knows is that you got the chance to begin again, Stiles. After all the shit we went through, you actually got to start over. With somebody who will absolutely protect your soul with their life.”

Stiles suddenly blinks furiously, like somebody just threw salt in his eyes.

“And you knew it, that she knew... something,” Derek smiles back, lovingly, before that smile turns a little wry. “It's just that you were kind of—now, how should I put this…?”

“No. Do not do it!” Stiles shouts—instantly catching on because he'd easily be the brightest bulb in any box—and he's pointing again, at Derek this time. “Puns are my stupid thing, you charlatan, and I can and will sue!” he warns, outraged yet smiling again as he wipes at his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt.

“—barking up the wrong tree,” Derek finishes, his smile now positively wolfish.

Stiles shakes his head and narrows his eyes, but he's chuckling, too as he says, “You do remember that it's you who's the canine in this relationship, right, 'wolf? If anybody's going to be making barking sounds, it's you.”

“Speciesist,” Derek quips.

Stiles pokes his tongue out. Then he's quiet for a few seconds (but definitely no more than fifteen).

“You know, I really was wrong when I said you deserve better than me. We actually absolutely deserve each other, Hale. Because it turns out we are both humongous assholes.”

After a moment, Derek grins more.

“Well, I would have answered that with I love my asshole, but you had to go and use the word humongous, and there's no way I would say that about my asshole—even though I would have technically been talking about you when I said it, seeing as it's actually you that is my favourite asshole.” And he pulls a rare, goofy face, just for Stiles, who laps it up. “Also, thinking about it, I would also have to say that loving my actual asshole is, in fact," he points at Stiles, “your job.”

Stiles dramatically slaps a hand over Derek's mouth.

“Oh my God, Derek, stop! My ghostly mother could be listening in to us right now! Jeez, dude, have a little decorum, won't you?!” And if Stiles saying that isn't ironic, Derek really doesn’t know what is.

“Sorry, mom!”

Grinning even more, Derek pushes Stiles's hand away from his face.

“Hey, wanna know the coolest thing?” he asks.

“Why in the name of anything sacred did you bother posing that as a question, Der? Like, when would I ever say no to that?”

Derek leans over and kisses Stiles again, soft and languid this time. The boy's lips are dry and warm and he tastes just like autumn.

Stiles hums and smiles into Derek's mouth as if he really, truly does love Derek.

After another glorious moment, Derek pulls back, looks at Stiles and says, “Yew trees aren't even native to this part of California.”

for @greyhavenisback my beloved <3 sorry i'm a dipshit, douche, massive ass-hat and a total loser, sometimes xp

(i got the info on tree symbolism HERE btw)

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yeet-noir · 2 years ago

Text

Wait people actually believe Gabriel was redeemed in the end? He manipulated people up to his dying breath and wished to be seen as a hero. I know the ending seemed strange, but it definitely did so purposefully. This was a set up for the conflict next season not a wrap up of his arc.

I get the initial shock, but this show never held back on the abusive nature of Gabriel. In season 5 alone the total shift of Gabriel was idgaf about my son’s happiness and being mad at his lack of control he has on him. The last thing he did was control Adrien’s perspective of him. He went from wanting to be with his wife to being completely power hungry. His power hunger lead to Gimmi granting his desires.

And if that still isn’t enough to comfort people just remember that every season ends with a set up for the conflict that will follow in the next season:

Season 1 finale introduced Lila as an antagonist interested in the Miraculous and Marinette’s personal life which lead to Lila’s arc start which more so carried out in later seasons.

Season 2 finale introduced Mayura and Ladybug, Chat Noir the other heroes had their first epic fight beyond the scope of villain of the week. This lead to the introduction of sentimonsters and Mayura’s arc which heavily carried out in season 3.

Season 3 finale was another epic fight, but this time against Hawkmoth and Mayura. Master Fu’s identity becomes compromised leading to him passing down his guardianship to Marinette. This introduced Marinette’s guardian arc and season 4 heavily focused on her struggles with being one and maintaining peace with Chat Noir. This season also ended with both the love square “moving on” from one another which in turn caused season 4 to focus on their alternative ships.

Season 4 finale ended with Ladybug loosing the miraculous after being swindled by Felix. Felix offering a trade off with Gabriel for the Peacock miraculous. We literally ended with Ladybug having a mental breakdown and Chat Noir comforting her. This introduced the Monarch arc. Season 5 dealt with the consequences of this mistake.

So what I am trying to say each season finale ends with something that makes you wonder what will happen next. It never ends with a final conclusion only introduction to the next big arc. Seeing a weird reality where Gabriel is remembered as a hero despite us seeing him as villainous as ever to the very end isn’t his conclusion it’s a new arc.

#miraculous ladybug #ml #gabriel agreste #monarch #ml recreation #ml recreation spoilers #ml analysis #mine

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female-hysterics · 9 months ago

Note

Stormkobra-5 asked:

sets food down carefully* Fuck or die scenario, you say?!?!

Okay, picture THIS!!!

You and Steven have been been crushing on each other for MONTHS, okay??? And neither of you have made a move yet because you’re both Shy As Fuck™️ or smth, and you end up trapped in some ancient Greek tomb on a mission— my nerd brain is thinking of stories where stuff like this actually happened in some myths I can’t remember which ones atm but— after decoding the inscriptions on the temple that state the victims must either consummate OR get crushed by a ceiling of spikes that descends if they don’t within like an hour or two or smth 🙂🙂🙂 Indiana Jones style traps I guess XD

IDK I haven’t thought of any actual scenarios tbh just the PORN—

Alternatively, I offer you Steven trying an aphrodisiac and he turns into a total dom, and I’ll leave your imagination to run wild 😈😈😈

Oh jeez... 🥵 I honestly don't know which one I like better.....🥴

Dom Steven has my heart SO

Steven taking the aphrodisiac innocently, not realizing what it is, and by the time you do realize what it is he is gone. His eyes are both soft with adoration and burning with pure lust while his hands effortlessly strip you of your panties and yank your shirt and bra down enough to free your breasts.

"I just have to feel you, love. Let me just come inside your tight little cunt, take the edge off, yeah?, and then I'll fuck your throat like a good girl," he all but growls in your ear while bending you over his desk, sending a small tower of his books toppling over, and your head is spinning at his words and you are positively dripping for him.

He does exactly that, fucking you deep and hard until you are seeing stars until he spills inside you with a hurt sound deep in his chest, and then you are on your knees with his hands fisted in your hair and his cock buried in your throat while you drool and choke and moan his name. Steven seems to twist you in every position possible, even some that leave you flushing in embarrassment, but he is ravenous for you. His touch desperate, words filthy as he grunts them into your flesh, and you can't help but notice how hot his skin is. How his hands tremble against you, how his eyes are glazed, and this heart is fluttering like a hummingbird in his chest. You are worried for him, but with each orgasm he drags from you your brain become more and more fried.

Everything eventually becomes a blur at one point and you are lost in a sea of heat and euphoria. When you come back to reality you are a sticky naked mess, body limp and laying sideways on the destroyed bed with Steven curled up behind you, and you dimly realize that he was still holding himself inside you. His breathing was even, skin cooled down to a more reasonable temperature, and his heartbeat is a strong steady beat.

"Was a bit rough, wasn't I?" He suddenly whispered against your shoulder and your throat is raw as you try to croak out a response.

You feel him twitch inside you and then he slowly starts to roll his hips in slow sensual waves that make your eyes roll back in your head. His hand moves up from where it was resting on your breast and curls around your throat gently, tilting your head back until you could pant against his open mouth, and you didn't even have the energy to grasp at his arms as his hips continued to snap against you deep and slow. He groaned against your lips.

"A little longer, love. Let me fill you just a little longer."

#Steven Grant #Moon Knight #marvel cinematic universe #steven grant headcanons #steven grant x reader #oscar isaac headcanons #oscar isaac x reader #Oscar Isaac #the void answers

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thisgirlnamedblusy · 5 months ago

Note

heyy, at first I wanted to say I love your works so much! You're so talented with your writing...

Anyway could you write something like G!PDonna x maid reader where y/n was a girl from the village who ran away but got lost and Donna saved her, y/n started working for her for free just to have a place to live and gradually they got closer until Donna realized that she was so in love with her And she starts to be very possessive, but she doesn't show it because they still are not dating and one day Some young vampire comes to visit to pick up something and starts flirting and Donna goes crazy.

They end up in a big fight and Donna ping y/n against a wall and feelings will be revealed....maybe some vanilla smut at the end...

Thanks! And also sorry for my English...i'm still learning<3

Yess!!!! Thank you for you kindness and for your request!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!!! :))))))))

To be her maid

Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem, Maid! Reader

Warnings: G!P Donna, smut, Minors DNI, slightly dark themes, possessive Donna

Word count: 8,793

Summary: To leave and die, to stay and love, what a decision...

N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours!!! I love you all!!! :))

Your parents were right: no one could ever leave the village.

Wandering through the forest was always a risk, getting lost in that tangle of trees and snow would be easy even for the bravest of explorers.

But you were not brave, nor an explorer. You were just a villager, an ordinary girl who lost everything, who had no reason to stay in a place like that. Your family was gone, the Black Gods, who Mother Miranda defended, had abandoned you.

With nothing to fight for but your own life, with nothing to thank the Gods for, your only way out was the most risky: escape.

You didn't know what leaving that sinister village could bring you, what a girl like you could do in an unknown world. But, finding out, was much better than waiting for the darkness to consume you.

A small backpack and a desire to escape was your only luggage. Not even your old home had had mercy on you. The outside world offered itself to you as an alternative you couldn’t refuse, or rather, as your only alternative.

A few more hours of walking, and you would be free.

But your illusions outweighed reality, your desire to live outside that darkness eclipsed your situation. You couldn't escape, and deep down, you knew it. Turning around wasn't an option, guiding yourself by the dark lights of the village would only bring you more suffering, you had to continue.

Some growls behind the bushes made you stop and look around. It could be a dog, a forest vermin, something totally harmless. You swallowed as your eyes danced through the forest, looking for a different pattern in the movements of the branches, something that would tell you where those growls were coming from. Everything seemed so calm that it could only be that calm before the storm.

“Calm down, (Y/N), it's just the wind,” you whispered, forcing your legs to walk again. Your reassuring words wouldn’t take long to lose their effect.

One step, two, three... Footsteps in the snow that sounded closer and closer petrified your body again.

“Okay,” you whispered again, taking a map out of your pocket, one that indicated the path to freedom beyond the domain of the dark deities, of Mother Miranda, of the Lords...

The snow made it difficult for you to orient yourself, but your movements resumed automatically, moving away from the noise and deviating from the path. The faster you walked, the faster those footsteps in the snow seemed. Reality was stalking you, although you refused to believe it.

A furious roar diverted your gaze from the bushes. It was not a man, nor a wolf, it was a monster. One of those chosen by Mother Miranda to protect the village, to protect your insignificant lives, stood before you with a bloodthirsty gaze.

Lycan, that was its name, the name the Gods gave to that poor villager whose blind faith drove him to become a beast.

You breathed heavily, but fear made you back away. Those bloody eyes stared at you as the cold steam came out of its jaws. You didn't want to go back, but you had to find an alternative route.

Behind you, more monstrous creatures waited to devour you, to punish you for your audacity. They only growled, watching you, waiting for the best moment to attack you.

Your voice dried up and your body trembled with terror. You had nothing to fight for, but many reasons to live, to not let fear consume you, to flee, to escape, to earn that freedom.

With your eyes you looked for a corner, a gap in the bushes that you approached slowly. The growls of the beasts confirmed their displeasure, and they were the signal you needed to start running.

You fled without a destination, unable to look back.

Your strength weakened after a short time, they didn’t get tired of chasing you. You seemed safe, but you still heard their roars. After taking a breath, you continued running forward, until the path became rocky and then, nonexistent.

Your feet found no ground to support them and your body fell into the void. You rolled down a steep slope, covering your head. No, you couldn't end up like this.

With a thud, you fell to the ground. The creatures roared, but apparently, they couldn't see you.

“Oh...” you lamented, getting up from the penetrating cold of the snow, looking around. “I think I have lost them...” you whispered, scanning the clearing with your gaze. There was only an old tree surrounded by rock walls.

Not managing to recognize the place, you took out the map again, looking for something similar. You didn't find it, you were lost.

“What is this?” you asked, approaching an object hanging from the tree, something that looked like a hanged person. Of course, it wasn't, it was just an old doll. “A doll?”

Before your reasoning could begin to draw conclusions, a cloud of snow came down the wall you fell down. You hadn't lost them. The lycans would never stop until they got their prey.

With no time to react, you ran again, the roars were getting closer. In front of you there was only one way out: an old wooden bridge. You couldn't even stop to take a look at the map, even though you were convinced you had seen that bridge somewhere.

It didn't matter anymore. The wolves were chasing you even through that unstable wood. The other side was anything but a safe place. Not even the heights or the instability seemed to those beasts to want to stop.

Your clumsiness caused you to stumble again, falling to the ground. You felt claws pulling at your leg, the satisfied growls of those beasts dragging you into their jaws. (Y/N) had met her end.

“No!” you screamed desperately, kicking that lycan in a last attempt to save yourself, one that you knew was useless. “No, no, no!”

You could already feel the breath of that monster, that anxious panting to devour your flesh but, suddenly, your leg was released with a gasp of pain.

You opened your eyes to check what had happened. The four creatures that were chasing you had moved away, looking at you with impossible, terrified eyes. Agonizing cries came from their jaws as they slowly retreated across the bridge.

“What…?” you asked in a sigh, crawling backwards through the snow, watching how suddenly the monsters seemed to fear you. Fear a villager? No, it couldn't be possible.

The beasts growled again, retreating faster, more frightened. At your side you saw a black shadow, one that passed by you without paying attention, that stood at the end of the bridge, looking at the lycans.

A black dress, a black veil, a stoic figure standing before you. It took your frightened head a while to understand, but not long enough to not be able to react.

There was only one person, one woman who could fit those characteristics. The lycans were not the most dangerous thing in that place. In front of you, with her back turned, was one of the Lords, the youngest, surely the most feared: the doll maker, Donna Beneviento.

The beasts retreated even further, fleeing in terror from that imposing presence. They feared her, those beasts feared her, and so did you.

Since it seemed that the lady in black had ignored your presence, you decided to take advantage of the opportunity to retrieve your backpack from the snow and back away slowly, without attracting attention.

“That's it, that's it! Get out of there, you rude mutts!” a shrill voice made you shrink in place, but you couldn't stop, you had to get out of there as soon as possible. “And don't come back! Donna, Donna, what are the lycans doing here?”

The lady simply shrugged, emitting what seemed like a sigh. Unintentionally, you had stopped in your attempt to run away and when you realized, it was too late.

“Hey, hey! You!” The lady turned to your position and that sinister puppet pointed at you effusively.

You shook your head, finally reacting, standing up and running away again clumsily.

“Hey! Where do you think you're going, stupid?” the doll shrieked while you looked at it terrified.

Fear made you do something stupid, made you look back, at that woman in black instead of at the path ahead of you. The worst mistake of your life.

Your body collided painfully with a tree, causing you to get seriously dizzy and fall to the ground.

“Ow…” you complained, looking at the cloudy sky, your head throbbing in pain and slow steps in the snow getting closer and closer.

That dark figure came closer, looking at you from above. She didn't say anything, she didn't do anything. She just watched you.

“Hey, stupid! Were you trying to go through the tree with that big head of yours?” the doll said, putting itself in your range of vision, harassing you with that sinister look.

You turned around scared, leaning your back against the tree, running as far away as possible from those two dark figures.

The doll, whose name was Angie, returned to the arms of its owner with a comical movement, looking at her curiously, and then at you, repeating that gesture several times.

“What are you doing in my territory?” the doll spoke again, but with a much deeper, much darker voice.

You were terrified, you couldn't move and the words didn't seem to want to come out of your mouth.

“What are you doing in my territory!?” the puppet shouted again, without losing that different darkness in its voice. It was the lady who spoke, you had no doubt.

“I... I...” you murmured, hurt and scared, raising your knees to your chest, like a protective shield that you knew didn't exist.

“Don't you know what happens to stupid little girls who dare to come here?” Angie said again, with that voice that wasn't Angie's, while the lady bent down to look at you more closely.

“Y-Yes I do, my lady,” you were able to say, looking away from that black veil, from that dark figure, the figure of death itself.

“Oh, so you know…” Angie murmured, as the woman stood up again. “Then you must be stupid.”

You shook your head, closing your eyes, awaiting a fate even worse than death.

“Do you know who I am?” she asked again, in a darker tone. “Answer!”

“Lady Beneviento,” you said in a small voice, lowering your head, burying it between your legs. “Please have mercy on me.”

“What are you doing here? Speak!” she shrieked, enraged by your lack of communication, one that it was due to the fear you felt.

“I didn't want to come here, my lady… I…” you sobbed, joining your hands to beg for forgiveness. “I, I, I was being chased by some lycans and I ran, I fell and… I didn't know I was in your territory, I swear.”

“Did you get lost?” she asked, in a confused tone. “Are you lost?”

“Y-yes…” you sighed. “I fell down a hill and ended up here… I didn't know where I was, I was just, I was just trying to escape and…”

“Why were the lycans chasing you?” she asked in a calmer tone, without letting the doll go from her arms.

“I-I don't know, my lady,” you said uncertainly, knowing that it was not possible to deceive her.

“Perché menti?” a different voice asked, hoarse, a whisper coming from that black veil. You opened your eyes and shook your head again, kneeling on the ground.

“I didn't understand you, my lady, but please. Don’t, don't kill me... Please...” you begged with a sob, clasping your hands tightly together.

“Mm,” the lady murmured, looking curiously at the doll. “What do you think, Angie?”

“That she's stupid!” the doll shrieked, this time, with her real voice. “She's lost because she's a fool.”

“Please...” you sobbed again, trying not to open your eyes.

“Get up,” the doll ordered you, again with that dark voice. “Get up!” she shrieked, when she saw that her words had no effect on you. “You're coming with me.”

Unwillingly, with your whole body shaking, you obeyed.

You followed the lady through the forest until you reached a small clearing, one where you were forced to go up in an elevator, in absolute silence. Once up there, the vision in front of you made you shudder. A beautiful waterfall gently ran down a cliff, guarding an old mansion, one you had seen before, the Beneviento House.

“Come in,” that dangerous woman whispered, not needing her doll to talk to you, pushing you roughly inside that dark house. “Come on, move,” she insisted, seeing how your body seemed to want to stick to the dusty wooden floor.

You were so scared that you didn’t even bother to scan the house with your gaze. You simply sat down on the indicated sofa while the lady did the same, in front of you.

“Now, silly girl, we’re going to have a conversation,” Angie explained, in that shrill tone. “My Donna is going to ask you some questions and you are going to answer them, is that clear?”

You shifted on the sofa, nodding cowardly, trying not to look up.

“And don't try to lie, stupid, stupid... We'll know,” the doll threatened, leaning on a small coffee table and pointing at you in an unpleasant manner.

“What will happen to me if I lie?” you asked nervously, looking for somewhere to hide, somewhere to escape.

Neither the lady nor the doll answered directly, but rather let the silence enhance the tension of that conversation.

“You don't want to know, fool,” Angie sang, getting down from the table when the lady gestured towards her, directing the doll to her lap.

You lowered your gaze again.

“First question: what were you doing in my territory?” the doll asked, with that strange distorted voice again.

You weren't sure whether to look at the doll, or on the contrary, look for the hidden eyes of Lady Beneviento. Either option seemed dangerous.

“I've already told you,” you said, knowing that at least in that, you could be honest. “I was being chased by lycans, I tripped over a cliff and fell.”

“Mm,” the murmur came from the black veil. “Why were the lycans chasing you?” she asked, again, through her doll.

“Because…” you stammered. That was a dangerous question, too dangerous. “Because…”

“Stop stammering and answer me,” the lady growled, in her own voice.

“It's okay,” you finally said. After all, there was nothing that could save you. “I tried to leave the village.”

“Leave the village? Perché?” the woman in black asked, not needing the doll. Maybe she was just as nervous as you, although it seemed unlikely.

“Per, Per…” you repeated confused, scratching the back of your neck. “Sorry?”

“Why, you fool? Oh, Donna, just kill her, she's even dumber than she seems,” the doll protested, moving from her lap and walking towards you.

“Because…” you said, letting your nerves go aside, preventing the lie from showing through your words. No, there was no need to lie anymore. You were in the house of death. “I had nothing left, my lady.”

“Explain yourself,” she murmured, crossing her arms, ignoring the tugs the doll was giving on her black dress.

“My, my parents died three years ago and…” you began to explain, somehow, a little more calmly. If you didn't lie, you would be safe. “They, they were devotees of the Black Gods, but they never listened to their prayers.”

“Continue,” Lady Beneviento insisted, with a clearer, more understandable tone.

“We lost our crops, the animals died of hunger, my mother got sick and... My, my father couldn't bear it,” you explained, feeling a shiver from those bad memories.

“But you're still here,” she corrected, with an impatient, melodic voice, just like those strange words.

You shook your head, sighing, looking at the grey sky through the window.

“A storm destroyed my house a week ago. I no longer have a family, a home, or anything,” you said sighing, remembering out loud your miseries, what led you to risk yourself, and escape.

The lady nodded with disinterest. At the moment, nothing you said seemed like a lie to her.

“Is that all?” she asked, after another tense moment of silence.

“Is that all? I think that's enough reason to want to get out of here,” you answered, annoyed by that insinuation.

“Enough reason to want to die?” she asked again, with a haughty tone, leaning slightly towards you.

“I don't want to die, my lady, I just want to get out of this place,” you said with a softer voice, repressing any impulse to scream, to protest at that apparent incomprehension.

“Let me tell you something, you unfortunate girl...” Beneviento murmured, getting up from the chair with that same dark elegance. “Getting out of here only means dying.”

“What else could I do?” you asked with a frown, with anger beginning to run through your veins.

“I don't know. Maybe instead of complaining, you could have looked for a solution,” the woman in black rebuked you, with that same hoarse, cocky tone, one typical of what she was, a Lord.

“A solution? Excuse me, my lady, but I think you haven’t understood my situation,” you said nervously.

“Mm, a girl like you…” she sighed, getting closer, with a slow step. “Do you know how to clean?”

“Yes,” you answered confused, blinking rapidly.

“Cook?”

“Yes, more or less,” you said with your voice getting weaker and weaker.

“Mm, then… Why don't you look for work instead of throwing yourself to your death? The castle always needs maids,” the lady asked, with a tone that seemed to hide some contempt for your sorrows.

“I don't like the castle, my lady,” you said, lowering your gaze, moving your legs nervously.

No, you didn't want to end up there, you didn't want to end up serving that lady in white, you didn't want your fate to be the same as your friends, some who, once they entered that place, would never return.

A sound like laughter escaped from the lady in black as she shook her head.

“Oh… But the castle sure likes you,” Angie commented, absent until that moment.

“Mm, okay, silly girl…” the woman in black sighed. “I'm tired of hearing you talk…”

“Can I go, my lady?” you asked, standing up hastily, not believing that you could get out of that place alive.

“Yes, go away, but I warn you…” she hissed. “If you try to escape from the village, you will die. So I recommend that you return to your ruined cabin. This time I won’t be there to protect you.”

Those last words entered your mind, unlocking a truth that you were not yet aware of.

You were about to die, those beasts had already caught you. They were ready to devour you. But they didn’t, Donna Beneviento appeared and the monsters fled. You thought she had barely noticed your presence, but you were wrong. Whether you wanted to or not, that woman had saved you from dying in a horrible way, she had saved your life.

“My lady,” you said thoughtfully, already walking towards the door, turning around slowly. “I haven’t thanked you.”

“Mm? Cosa?” she asked, crossing her arms again, moving a leg impatiently.

“Thank you, my lady,” you stammered, relaxing your expression. “You saved my life.”

A mocking laugh came from the doll, who tilted her head to mock you. The lady didn’t move, she simply nodded almost imperceptibly.

“Well, anyone can make a mistake,” she murmured, looking away. You couldn’t help but smile at those words. “Go away, you are disturbing me.”

You nodded, biting your lip and turning around again. The doll maker's words bounced around in your mind.

Yes, she was right, she didn’t have to lie to you, dissuade you from your attempt to escape. She only warned you of the danger you would have by doing so, why would she bother to warn you? What did Lady Beneviento care about the life of a stupid villager like you? Maybe it was not as terrible as everyone said.

Escape and die, stay and live. Two options that traveled dangerously through your mind. Staying could mean death too, dying of cold, of hunger… Escaping was just the prelude to a quick, but more painful death.

The trembling of your body and the inevitable death you would suffer with either of those two options forced your brain to work hard, looking for a third, one you didn’t think about too much.

“My lady,” you said, before crossing the door, with a frown. “I could stay with you.”

“What do you mean, silly?” Angie asked, with an exaggerated gasp of surprise. “Stay here?”

“Yes, I…” you said hastily, leaving your small backpack on the floor. “I could, I could be your maid.”

“Maid? I thought you said you didn't like being a maid,” the lady asked, with a curious tone, not too startled by your proposal. You didn't know if that was a good sign.

“No, I... I said I didn't like the castle,” you corrected with a nervous smile, you didn't know why.

“Do you like this house?” she asked, with a voice that betrayed distrust.

“I don't know, but... I think, I think it would be a better option than dying,” you sighed tiredly, making use of your last resource, your last desperate option. “You don't even have to pay me.”

“Don't you want money?” the lady asked, tilting her head curiously. “What kind of stupid maid are you?”

“I'm not a maid, I'm just a desperate girl who needs a place to live,” you said confidently, sounding as sad as possible, thinking that, if inside that dress there was something resembling a heart, maybe it would soften.

“A desperate girl,” Lady Beneviento repeated, darkening her posture. “Idiota.”

“There's no need to insult, my lady,” you said in a small voice, risking yourself again.

“Do you think your life is a disgrace, stupid?” she asked nervously, approaching you and grabbing the collar of your dress, making you gasp in fear. “Do you think you're the only one who has lost everything?” she rebuked you, with one hand tightly grabbing your clothes and the other traveling to her black veil, pushing it away with a brusque gesture. “Look at me... Look at me!”

“My, my lady,” you complained, finally discovering one of the biggest mysteries of the village, what was behind that black veil.

No matter how many times you looked at it, nowhere on that beautiful face could you see anything resembling a monster. Donna was a beautiful woman, really beautiful. You didn't even know why that was your first impression. You should be scared.

“I lost everything too, my family, my life! Don't think you're special, stupid girl…” the lady growled, letting you go in an unpleasant way. “Now get out of here, you don't want to work for a monster like me.”

“You're not a monster,” you said without thinking, letting your voice speak as it wanted, not how it should. “You, your face is fine, you have a very… beautiful eye…”

“Are you laughing at me?” she asked with a deranged look. You quickly shook your head.

“Um, Donna, Donna…” Angie interrupted, tugging hard at her dress, gesturing for Donna to pick her up from the floor. “Maybe it's not such a bad idea for this fool to work for us… Think about it, it's free…”

“Mm…” she murmured, fighting her own demons, some of which you had already heard about. “Va bene…”

“What?” you asked nervously, putting on your clothes, that were disheveled by her grip.

“What's your name?” she asked, breathing nervously, not bothering to cover her face again. You didn't know if it was because she was going to kill you, or because she liked your reaction. “Your name…” she hissed impatiently.

“(Y/N),” you said in a small voice.

She turned her gaze, nodding nervously, pointing at you with her finger.

“Fine, (Y/N) you will work for me. But don't expect me to thank you, I'm the one doing you a favor and I warn you,” she hissed, darkening that beautiful look. “Try to play me and you'll wish the lycans would devour you.”

You smiled in relief, nodding profusely. At least you wouldn't have to escape anymore. At least your life would start to make a little more sense.

At first it was difficult for you to adapt to this new life. Your dreams of going out into the outside world were still very present in your mind. Little by little, as time went by, they were only faint memories.

Living with Donna Beneviento was complicated, but bearable. You were able to see her delicate mental health, her crises, her anger without reason… Miraculously, you began to stop them and comfort that lady in black even though she didn't ask you to.

You were nothing but a maid, for you there were no more words than a thank you from time to time, or a whisper that you couldn't understand. Little by little, you also began to relax, to get used to that language that you didn't understand, to feel the presence of the lady in black as something comfortable and not threatening.

You would always be grateful to her, even though you were afraid to show it, to tell her. To her you were just a nuisance, but at least a useful one. Fortunately or unfortunately, the Angie doll fulfilled the social needs of a human being, giving you the opportunity to talk to her, even if it was just nonsense, or mockery of you.

Donna's mysterious gaze was always on you, you could feel it when she thought you weren't aware. She was always vigilant, always attentive to your movements. What at first you considered as a slight uncomfortable harassment soon became routine, soon your head turned towards her, outlining an increasingly sincere smile.

A smile that was not difficult for you to emit, the same smile you slept with every night, under the shelter of those rickety walls, under the shelter and protection of a Lord, one increasingly present in your thoughts, in your feelings.

“Excuse me, my lady,” you said entering the workshop with a hurry, carrying a tray with a steaming cup of tea. The lady didn’t turn around, she simply gestured for you to come closer. You weren’t expecting a greeting either… “Your tea.”

“Grazie, (Y/N),” the brunette murmured, seeming to be concentrating on two small garments, surely for one of her hundreds of dolls.

“Is everything okay, my lady?” you asked curiously, looking, as for some time now, for an excuse to stay by her side, even if it was only a few more minutes.

She just nodded, comically scratching her head. She seemed distracted, more thoughtful than usual.

“Go away, you're disturbing me,” she whispered, without looking at your face. You sighed in defeat and obeyed, turning around with a soft bow. “Wait, wait, come here.”

Her voice sounded hurried, nervous, while her hand again indicated you to come closer. You avoided smiling shamelessly, but obeyed elegantly.

“Can I help you with something, my lady?” you asked kindly, with a calm face, hiding the strong beating of my heart.

“Um, sì…” she murmured, getting up from the work table and abruptly grabbing a chair, placing it next to her. “Sit down.”

You nodded and did as she asked, intrigued.

“Tell me, (Y/N), what do you think it is?” she asked with a frown, extending what looked like a porcelain body towards you. You took it nervously, examining it in detail.

“A, a doll, my lady,” you said in a low voice, returning the object to her. She smiled mockingly, shaking her head.

“Una bambola… No, (Y/N),” she said, with a tired sigh, rubbing her eye and leaving that porcelain body standing on the table. “Dolls have clothes. Do you see any clothes?” she asked somewhat nervously, as if she was frustrated in some way.

You shrugged, trying to keep that kind smile.

“I'm sorry, my lady,” you apologized in a low tone. She suddenly looked at you and then looked at that lifeless doll.

“I always try to sew a suitable outfit for each of my little dolls, but with this one… With this one it's more difficult to choose,” she explained with a calm voice, looking at that doll from all possible angles. “I can't decide.”

“What are the options, my lady?” you asked, looking at a pile of fabrics that the lady had on the table.

“What you see,” she commented, crossing her arms. “Tell me what do you think.”

“Mm…” you murmured, taking each of the fabrics, looking at that empty doll to compare it with them. “I think gray would suit it well, my lady.”

“Gray…” she sighed, taking the fabric from your hands and comparing it to the doll's red lips. “Yes, it will do.”

“I hope I've helped you, my lady,” you said in a friendly manner. “Do you need anything else, my lady?”

“I'd like to ask you some personal questions, if you don't mind. I want to get to know you better,” she said, thus revealing the only reason for you to stay there.

You couldn't help but blush and bite your lip nervously as you nodded.

“Of course, my lady.”

“Do you like to read?” Donna asked, placing the fabric in the old sewing machine.

“Yes, my lady, I did,” you said, watching mesmerized as the lady sewed. Your heart was telling you strange things, too strange.

“It's funny, I haven't seen you pick up a single book in all the time you've been here. You can read the books you want, (Y/N),” she said, without taking her gaze off the cloth. “You don't have to ask for permission.”

“Oh, well, thanks, I… I didn't want to do anything without you… Well, nothing that could bother you…” you said nervously, moving your hands erratically.

“I don't mind if you read,” she whispered, barely paying attention to you. “I'd rather you do it than become one of those brainless maids at the castle.”

“Brainless?” you asked curiously, giving the woman in black the objects she pointed at with her gaze, without your presence being bothersome to her, something that made you smile more and more.

“Mm,” Donna nodded, cutting the cloth. “Unlike my sister, I value intelligence over pretty breasts.”

“Oh, um…” you said, laughing nervously. She looked at you with a serious face, as if she was surprised by your shock.

“Did I say something funny?” the lady asked, annoyed by your nervousness.

“Well, yes, my lady,” you said among laughs. She looked at you with her eyebrow raised, shaking her head.

“Although I don't know if you're really that intelligence... You wanted to get out of here...” she murmured cockily, with a haughty smile on her face.

“I had nothing to keep me here for,” you murmured a little more seriously.

She stopped, sighing.

“I feel you,” Donna whispered with a weak, different voice, as if her mood had suddenly changed, something that didn't surprise you. “I was also as stupid as you, you know?”

“My lady?”

“Before Mother Miranda adopted me, I thought the same as you, why stay in this horrible place? I had no family, no friends... I was completely alone,” she explained without you asking for explanations. You listened interested. “But I understood one thing, (Y/N), if you run away from your problems, they will follow you wherever you go.”

“That's very wise, my lady,” you commented, nodding slightly, agreeing with her.

“Donna,” she said in a brusque tone. “I can't stand you calling me that, I have a name, you know?”

“D-Donna, I'm sorry...” you apologized in a low voice, blushing. “I just mean to be polite.”

The lady stopped again in her work, looking at you with a sincere, almost embarrassing smile. That smile would give you a lot of trouble tonight.

“You were right, gray is the right color, (Y/N), maybe I need your good taste more often.”

“Oh, of course my la, Donna, you can count on me,” you said with an elated tone, one that you tried to calm down.

“I have to admit that it was not a bad idea to you to be my maid,” she commented with a lower tone, looking away from you strangely. “I don’t regret it.”

“Thank you,” you sighed, resting your elbow on the table.

“What about you, (Y/N)? Do you regret being with me?” she asked with a different tone, a more somber, looking at you out of the corner of her eye.

“No, of course I don’t, Donna.”

“Mm,” she murmured, sighing and returning to that gray dress that was slowly taking shape. “You can go.”

Before leaving the workshop, you turned your gaze towards the lady in black, who did the same, with a serious expression, looking at you briefly without saying anything before turning her head again.

A strange sigh came from your lips. Your legs trembled as you exited the elevator. You couldn't, you didn't want to feel those things, you wouldn't allow your heart to be wrong for the joy of having a place to live to mixed with those feelings that you shouldn't feel.

“Hey, maid!” Angie shouted, startling you as always, interrupting the rambling of your mind, of your feelings. “Come here!”

“What do you want, Angie?” you asked in a more casual tone, one that you knew the doll tolerated, maybe too much.

“I'm bored,” the puppet complained. “Come, play with me.”

“Play? Angie… It's five in the afternoon, I'd like to rest before making dinner,” you said in a tired tone, but walking inevitably towards the doll.

“Evil, boring maid!” she protested in her shrill voice. At least those shrieks blurred the thoughts about the lady in black.

“Oh… Okay…” you sighed defeated, putting a hand on your forehead. “We'll play, but just for a while, okay?”

A while, how naive.

Time passed while the doll and you played cards. It hurt you to admit it, but spending time with the doll was quite entertaining, even if she always, always cheated.

“21, I won again,” the satisfied doll said, taking all the buttons you used as currency.

“You're so lucky,” you commented amused, shuffling the cards again.

“I'm the luck,” the doll joked. “Hey, you're very funny, maid.”

“Oh, really? Is it funny to see me lose?” you asked ironically, shaking your head.

“Oh, yes, very much so, but… I'm actually serious,” Angie commented, dealing the cards with a comical gesture. You raised your eyebrows with a curious smile. “My Donna and I used to play… But lately she's being a boring fool.”

“Donna has a lot of things to do,” you commented, coming to the brunette's defense.

“Nonsense, she's boring, she never wants to play cards. She's always with those stupid dolls that are much less cool than me,” she said amused.

You couldn't help but laugh at those comments, but your laughter died down as soon as you looked up.

“She’s always: leave me alone, Angie, I don't want to play, Angie, I'm a boring fool who only wants to be with her dolls and…” the doll continued mockingly while you, amused, gestured with your head towards the lady in black, who listened to the doll's complaints in silence.

“Boring, huh?” the lady in black murmured, crossing her arms and causing an amused gesture from the doll.

“Oh, Donna, I hadn't seen you,” the puppet said, fleeing subtly. “I was talking about… Another Donna, an uglier and dumber Donna, not about you…”

“Donna, I…” you said getting up from the floor and shaking off your dress. “I'm sorry, I forgot dinner time and I...”

“No, stay,” she said, stopping you with an arm on your wrist. “I think you should know something,” she commented in an unsettling tone, bending down to the white veil of her doll and taking out a card from it.

“Hey!” Angie protested when her owner revealed her cheat.

“Hey, what a cheater,” you joked, frowning, but not really upset.

“If you're going to cheat, at least try not to do the same thing,” the lady in black commented, sighing and handing you that card. “Besides, who are you calling boring?”

“You, silly Donna,” Angie whispered, in a threatening tone.

The lady laughed unexpectedly, shaking her head and getting down on the floor, gesturing for you to sit next to her.

“Silly? We'll see about that... (Y/N), give me cards too,” she said amused, thus starting a different time, completely different.

“Good, good! Donna plays too!” the doll celebrated.

After that fun afternoon of games, things in the mansion changed completely. They weren't just whispers, just words of gratitude. Questions began to come out of her lips, doubts about your tastes, your concerns. Lady Beneviento had changed, and you didn't know why.

Talking to her was easier for you, just as it was easier for her to talk to you. It was an unexpected connection, two souls that seemed predestined to meet each other. Considering her a friend was too bold, but the feelings in your heart were worse.

It could be her beauty, her voice, her lavender scent, her smile… It could be many things, but what was certain was that you were attracted to her, a lot. At first it just seemed like a silly thing, a feeling of gratitude to the brunette. But, after months, after a long time exchanging smiles, thoughts, interesting conversations, you realized that it wasn't like that.

You were in love with her, hopelessly in love.

You thought about her all the time, even doing the most boring tasks. The smile that formed on your face when you imagined her beauty, her words, accompanied you day after day, even in something as boring as sweeping the old porch.

“Mmmm…” you hummed while you cleaned, with those thoughts always sailing through your head. The impossibility of the reciprocity of her feelings was still far from your mind, too far to start breaking your heart.

“Shhh. The maid's going to hear you…” a voice interrupted your delirium, a voice that seemed to come from the old path to the mansion and that you didn’t recognize.

You frowned to try to discover its origin but, after failing, you continued with your tasks. That place was certainly perfect for you to confuse sounds with sinister voices.

“Hey, you!” Angie's shrill voice interrupted that sinister calm.

The lady in black, covered with her black veil, holding the puppet in her arms, left the house in a hurry, walking away from you, as if she had seen something dangerous.

“Donna?” you asked without being heard, seeing, to your surprise, two boys coming out behind some bushes.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry!” one of them said, backing away as the lady approached.

“We just had to come here due to a stupid bet!” the other said, walking backwards.

“Get out of my property!” Angie shrieked, in that dark voice. “Porca puttana! Get out, get out!”

“Yes, yes we're leaving now,” one of the boys muttered, running towards the elevator, terrified.

“I'm sorry, my lady!” the other yelled, disappearing into the darkness.

You watched in astonishment at that scene, how the lady in black growled furiously, approaching where you were again.

“You, haven't you noticed that they were watching you?” Donna told you, freeing herself from the veil with a furious gasp.

You opened your eyes wide and shook your head, confused.

“Um, no, I... I was just, I was just... Sweeping,” you commented, nervous due to Donna's abrupt attitude, one that had become more frequent for some time now.

“Sweeping…” she muttered mockingly, breathing heavily and looking you up and down, suddenly grabbing your arm. “What is this? What are you wearing?”

“A, a dress…” you said, blinking nervously. “I asked the Duke for it the other day, don't you like it?”

“Mm yes, I like it…” she whispered, nodding, seemingly calmer. “Do you know who likes it too? That pair of vermin who ran away, (Y/N). They couldn't take their eyes off you.”

“Oh, really?” you asked amused, blushing at the idea of looking attractive to another person, something you weren't used to.

“Do you find it amusing?” Donna asked, with a stern tone again. “Cazzo, cover yourself up!”

“Should I cover myself up? I…” you said confused, looking at your cleavage. “Oh, well, it's a bit provocative, isn't it?”

“A bit?” the lady questioned with a frown and a dark look. “I don't tolerate anyone looking at you like that, understand? If you're going outside, cover yourself up.”

“Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know it bothered you,” you apologized, tying a button to be less… Provocative.

“It doesn't bother me as long as I can see you, understand? Only me,” she said nervously, playing with her hands.

“What do you mean?” you asked nervously at those words, ones she seemed to regret immediately.

“Ugh… Don't you have to sweep?”

You nodded with wide eyes.

“Then sweep, (Y/N),” she said, pulling you into the house. “But do it here, do you hear me? Where I can see you and…” she stammered, running away hastily, as if she had gotten into a mess of words. “Cazzo!”

“Well…” you sighed, scratching the back of your neck and looking at Angie. “What's wrong with her?”

“I don't know,” the puppet answered, leaving you with more questions than answers.

That attitude could seem like something isolated, but it wasn't. As time went by, those little meaningless outbursts began to be more frequent. It seemed like something in her head was telling her that she had to protect you, to keep you away from any danger, or at least that's how you saw it.

It seemed like a duality, an internal struggle with herself, a change of sad and dark looks, of smiles and threats that you couldn't understand, at least until that day.

The door rang, interrupting a quiet moment. Donna was reading and you next to her, in silence, exchanging the usual shy glances, ones that were always accompanied by a smile.

“I'm going,” you said, sighing, closing the book and walking towards the entrance. You weren't expecting the Duke, or anyone really, but still, you were the maid, although you seemed less and less like it.

“Hello... What do we have here?” a young woman, covered by a black cloak greeted you with a purr. You knew her, she was one of the three Dimitrescu sisters.

“Hello, Miss...”

“Daniela,” the girl said, interrupting your formal and elegant greeting. “Who are you?”

“Oh, I'm, (Y/N), Lady Beneviento's maid,” you explained with a fake smile.

You knew what they were capable of, but you didn't know she could leave the castle. Well, it was a nice day, the sun was shining, maybe that was why.

“Maid? Aunt Donna has a maid? What a surprise, she hadn't told us anything although... I understand why...” she whispered, looking you up and down uncomfortably, forcing you to step back.

“Well, here I am,” you said, faking another smile, without losing your composure. “Did you want something, Miss?”

“Oh, yes, I came because my mother had to pick something up...” the young vampire commented, entering the house as if it were hers. There, behind you, Donna was waiting for you, covered in her veil and in a nervous pose.

“Aunt Donna!” the girl exclaimed, putting her arm around the brunette, a gesture that Donna, of course, rejected. “Why didn't you tell me you had a maid?”

“It's none of your business, Daniela,” a nervous voice came out of the black veil as she pushed the fly girl away from her.

“Oh, please...” the young Dimitrescu joked.

“What do you want? I'm busy,” the lady in black asked, with an impatient tone. The girl smiled, winking at you.

“Of course you are...” Daniela mocked, circling you like a carrion bird. “I'm sure you're very busy...”

“What do you want?” Donna asked again, with a rougher tone, shaking every time the girl got too close to you.

“I've come for my mother's commission,” the vampire explained. “Although well... Surely if we put a bow on this beauty...”

“Don't touch her,” the lady said, roughly pushing the vampire, who laughed in amusement.

“Well, well... Calm down, Aunt Donna...” Daniela mocked. “Sharing is good manners...”

“Vaffanculo...” the brunette hissed, turning around to search for something in the drawers and hand it to the vampire roughly. “Your blanket, now get out.”

“Oh, why the rush? What's your name, sweetie?” Daniela asked, approaching you and putting her arms around your shoulders in the same way, with a sensual voice that made you shiver.

“(Y/N),” you said with a trembling voice. You could feel Donna's gaze staring into yours, and it wasn't a friendly one.

“(Y/N), how about we go for a walk? It's a beautiful day to enjoy good company...” the young Dimitrescu whispered.

You didn't even have time to answer.

Donna growled furiously, pushing the vampire out of the house.

“Hey, hey! Don't be selfish, Aunt Donna! Hey, at least let my mother…!” the girl protested, silenced by a loud slam of the door.

“Ugh, thanks, Donna, I was getting a bit nervous,” you sighed, with a relieved smile.

The lady in black turned around, furiously pushing the veil away from her face. There was anything but a smile in her face.

“Nervous, you say?” she asked in a dangerous whisper. “I didn't see you nervous.”

“Well, I…” you stammered. “I didn't really know how to act.”

“That's why you let that stupid girl touch you?” she asked, approaching you dangerously. She seemed out of her mind again, acting in a deranged way. “Hey, come here!” she shrieked, grabbing you by your dress when you decided that running away was the best solution to that strange behavior.

You, frightened by that look, tried to struggle with her, but you couldn't do it. With a growl, she pushed you against a wall, preventing you from running away.

“How long are you going to keep laughing at me?!” she asked, hitting the wall with a fist, making you shrink in fear, totally confused and scared.

“Donna… What are you talking about?” you asked with a trembling voice, with your eyes shining with terror.

“Don't play dumb… Cazzo… Are you interested in her?” she asked, pointing to the door. “Are you planning to flirt with all the girls and boys in this fucking village?”

“I don't know what you're talking about! I'm not interested in her, Donna,” you said in your defense, shaking your head. She laughed nervously, making the same gesture. “You're, you're very nervous… Calm down, please…”

“I don't want to!” she squealed, too close to you. “I've tried, I really have, (Y/N), but I can't, I can't stand it…”

“What are you talking about?” you asked in a small voice. “Donna, you're scaring me.”

“You’re scaring me, (Y/N)…” she hissed, with a dark look, putting a hand on your cheek, a shaky and warm hand. “Every night you appear in my dreams, I see you in the dark, in the light, even when you're not here… I see you…”

“Donna,” you sighed, seeing in those words something like a confession, one you didn't think possible.

“You… You're… You're mine… You're my maid… You can't leave me. I can't let anyone take you away from me…” Donna murmured, sobbing too, adding another hand to your face. “Don't you see how much I’m suffering for you?”

“Yours?” you asked confused.

“Yes… Mia!” she screamed furiously again. “No one has the right to touch you, not even look at you! You are mine, and only mine! I, I, I, I, I…”

“Donna…” you murmured again, ignoring the screams, keeping her words.

“I'm… I'm in love with you…” the doll maker finally confessed, making your eyes open in surprise and your words get stuck in your throat. “I don't care that you don't feel the same… You are mine and… No one… No one has the right to…”

Unable to do anything else, your body reacted in a desperate, risky way, bringing you closer to her lips, closing the distance with a messy kiss, one that would silence her complaints, her stupid paranoia.

Yes, you were hers, but for a long time, and you knew it, you wanted it.

“I'm yours…” you whispered on her lips, tasting the salty tear that ran down her cheek. Her breathing was still labored, but her screams stopped. “Donna, I'm in love with you too…”

“What?” she asked surprised, not being able to control the impulse to kiss you again, to pin you against the wall and run her hands through your hair. “But…”

“I don't want anyone else, I'm not interested in anyone else,” you said among increasingly wild kisses. “I love you, I love the wonderful woman who saved my life, your beautiful smile, you, Donna, only you, that wounded heart that reminds me so much of my own…”

“That… That's… Nice,” she said, with a calmer smile, with a subtle blush on her cheeks as she pushed the hair out of your face. “Do you feel that way about me?”

“Yes,” you said nodding, caressing the soft skin of her hands. “You don't have to be like that, darling... No one will take me away from you...”

“I'm like that because I love you, because I don't want to lose you,” Donna whispered, finally explaining that strange behavior, that latent possessiveness that was slowly becoming evident.

“You won't lose me, I promise,” you said lovingly, comforting the lady with your sincere words.

Donna smiled, but it only lasted a moment. Suddenly, her gaze darkened, pushing you back against the wall, filling your mouth with wild, out-of-control kisses. You couldn't do anything else but accept them, enjoy her lips on your skin, on your neck, feel her hot hands moving down your dress.

“It's not enough...” she whispered on your lips, her breathing as agitated as yours, running her nails down your legs, her gaze getting darker and darker, with a spark of lust shining in her eye. “You have to be mine, now…”

“Donna… What…?” you asked, when the onslaught of kisses resumed, when her body stuck to yours irremediably, when her hips began to dance with yours. You couldn’t complain, you didn’t want to.

The gasps came out of your mouth, your hands traveled over the black dress, caressing, scratching everything in your path. You couldn't and didn't want to refuse, not even when her slender fingers pulled at your underwear, when she lifted your leg and her gaze was locked on you again.

“I won't be able to bear you saying no to me, (Y/N),” the lady hissed in your ear, scratching your leg as she played with her dress, releasing her own arousal and rubbing it against your wet entrance, surprising you. “I disgust you…”

“No, no… I love the way you’re, I love your body…” you said immediately, starting to feel how her erection was getting closer to its destination as, in an improvised way, she entered you, stealing your innocence in an unexpected way. “Donna!”

“Taci…” she whispered, moving her hips abruptly, taking you wildly against the wall, without you being able or willing to do anything to stop it.

The pain only lasted an instant, the pleasure came soon after, a pleasure you had never dared to feel, the pleasure of seeing how your wet walls were conquered, how her shaft claimed you anxiously to the sound of hurried moans, just like her movements.

Clumsy kisses replaced the moans, those obscene sounds that echoed in the old hall. You were in paradise, right where you wanted, in her arms, with her inside of you, being part of her body, part of her, not wanting her to leave.

An unknown cramp tensed your body, forced you to scream, to hold on to the lady, to scratch her back, to lose control.

Well, it wasn't what you could define as something romantic but... When with an agonizing cry, her seed ran through your body, flooding it with a pleasurable heat, you didn't care at all.

“Mine… You are mine now…” Donna repeated over and over, pulling you down from the wall and kissing you erratically, pulling at your waist, at your shamefully wet body.

“Donna… I love you… I love you…”

#donna beneviento #donna beneviento x reader #re8 donna #re8 village #oneshot #requests

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fashionteahouse · 1 month ago

Note

Totally random but could you write like an alternate ending one shot with Edward and y/n from the the story please lowkey wanna see that play out

ooo sure okay 💜 hope you enjoy :)

out of your league - paul edward x reader (alternate version)

AN: for the paul lovers, all i have to say is, i’m sorry 😭 ! don’t read if you are a paul lover !

read out of your league part 21 for context :)

>>next

The solemn was great but you were sure that your decision was the right one. Your mind was like a tornado by the way thoughts kept coming through.

At the jet landing, Larry and his girlfriend gave you a quick but tight hug before getting into their own car that had someone holding the car door open for them.

A car was waiting for you as well, with Edward holding the door open. You get in the passenger seat and Edward swiftly puts your luggage in the trunk, making sure to keep his quickness at a human level.

The trip was silent but the sound that beat around the car from the busy city life was heard. Reality had set in. You made your choice. Your choice to stay.

The traffic was bad, your eyes were glued to the window. The sky was starting to darken even more than it was, cold rain started to patter softly. A flick of the windshield wipers was heard.

“How was LA?” he asks you softly, dying to make conversation as he noticed your reserved presence but, you jumped at the voice snapping you out of your thoughts.

“Huh?” you ask him in a small voice.

“How was LA?” he asks again.

“Horrible.” you say, not changing the volume as you speak in a small voice.

“Really?” he asks in slight astonishment. You huff out a small sigh as you watch the rain roll down your window, it looked really close to tears. You just silently nod.

After some time, he looks over to you, “Do you want to listen to some music?”

“If you want to, you can turn some on. I’m not stopping you.” you say in a whisper.

It was low like a hum, the music starts to play from his stereo. The classical song that you told him you liked. You give a slight incredulous look, “Really?” you ask.

His lip lifts up into a smile only just a little, as he looked to you. In a way, it did soothe you a bit. It helped clear the thoughts in your mind. Your sadness started to slowly turn into a tad of anger.

If Paul was going to make an ultimatum like that, you thought, “Fuck it.”

It simply wasn’t fair. If the shoe was on the other foot, you wouldn’t make him choose like that.

“Are you hungry?” he asks and you notice that the song had ended, what’s now playing is something he seemed to enjoy as you didn’t know the song.

You shrug.

“Y/N, we can’t start this again.” he says softly.

“At least let me…get settled in first. I just want to decompress for a second.” you say. He complies.

The route to your apartment was in your eyes as you looked through the windshield at the street. You get out and your luggage is already in his hand as you move inside of the building.

“I will be quick.” you tell him and he nods as he walks to the sofa that he knew for sure that Alice had picked out.

You sit alone in your bedroom on your bed with your jacket still on. You checked your phone. It was evening now. No calls, no texts, just nothing. You toss it to the side on the soft surface and look to the floor for a moment with a frown with slump shoulders.

Your eyesight begins to blur as tears splat on your lap. You don’t make any noise but a deep breath as your face feels hot. This was something that you wanted so badly.

A soft knock makes you collect the tears from your eyes with a soft sniff.

“Yeah?” you call out after clearing your throat.

“Everything alright?” you hear through the door and you’re already up and walking towards it. You open it and Edward’s face is painted with slight worry.

“Yes….Let’s go.” you say to him as you now have yourself together.

You stared at the bubbles that floated about in your untouched drink. You forgot what you ordered.

“You’re upset…Why?” he rings out softly.

“I made a sacrifice.” you say lowly.

He stared at you even though your eyes were glued to the cup in front of you.

“Do you want to talk about what it was?” he asks.

You don’t say anything at first, but the words were at the tip of your tongue. You raise your eyes to his intense but amber eyes as you began to speak. You had his attention.

“Being here. Coming back here means I lose….him.” you say and you look down. He watched you.

The waiter comes before he could speak, he sets your plate down and you give him a quiet thank you after he says that the plate is hot.

“I’m sure you didn’t lose him.” he says to you as he slightly shakes his head.

“I did.” you say with such finality. You then take your eyes off of him before unwrapping the silverware. You stab your fork into your plate and you eat in silence without looking back up at him.

That night, you called and called Paul. There was no answer. No text back. Acceptance seeped into your body.

The next morning, Alice made you get out of bed. She wouldn’t stop calling to the point that it was your alarm. After getting dressed from your shower, you pull on your jacket and feel in your pockets. The sharp edge of the thin paper poked your fingers and you pull it out. You stared at the amount of 0’s that would change your life. This solidified that you are able to now be the artist without the starving part.

Alice sat with you in the office of a financial adviser at the private bank. You were quiet and let her do most of the talking.

“Do you want to draw later?” she asked softly when they had to answer a quick phone call. You look to her and she looked hopeful. She did nothing wrong and sketching usually made you pour out feelings that were deep within. You nod. She smiles excitedly.

“Okay and you’re good to go.” The fiduciary financial adviser says with a smile and you and Alice rise up.

“He didn’t answer at all?” she asks in disbelief. You told her that you haven’t spoken to Paul.

“No.” you say looking down at the sidewalk with your hands stuffed in your jacket pocket.

“Don’t jump to conclusions just yet. Maybe he’s in his wolf form and can’t answer.”

You sighed, “Alice, it’s the afternoon. He would’ve called me by now if not sooner…..” you say in defeat as you both walked.

Alice bells out a happy hello to her brother who is at his piano. The face on his was shocked that you had came in through the door right behind her. He gets up and walks over to you both.

“Where’s Jasper?” you ask to no one in particular.

“He went to visit Emmett.” Edward replies.

“You didn’t go?” you ask him as you took off your jacket. Edward almost immediately reaches out and you place it in his outreaching arms. He shakes his head.

“Come on!” she says excitedly.

She takes your hand and Edward watched as you disappeared with his sister.

The mannequin this time had nothing on it. A soft grin forms on your lips. You turn to Alice who is setting down plain white sheets on the large workspace.

“You didn’t make anything?” you ask surprised.

She just gracefully twirls as you stare at what she has on.

“Wow.” you just say and she just smiles.

As the sounds of pencils started to scratch into the room, she asks you, “So..Have an idea on what you would want to do for your birthday?”

You shrug, “Probably just treat myself out..Or something.” you say with uncertainty. That’s when her face stretched into a bright smile.

“What?” you ask her with a knowing grin.

“Nothing.” she says as she starts to color in the design she’s making.

“Yeah, right.” you say shaking your head with a chuckle and go back to finishing your own work. You didn’t care too much about drawing the clothes in a technical manner.

“So..What did you and Edward do for the two days I was gone?” you ask.

“We just did what we normally do. It was a bit boring to be honest.” she says.

“Really? I mean…You can guys can basically do anything.” you point out. This makes her laugh a little.

“But, I didn’t have anyone to do this with.” she says.

“Mm.” you say with a nod as you finish up with what’s on your paper.

It seemed as soon as you both got done, Edward appeared in the doorway.

“Look at what we made.” Alice says to him and waves him over. He enters and his eyes flicker to yours first. You put a hand over it. Alice nudges your hand, “Y/N.”

“It’s not as good as yours.” you say with a slight frown.

“Who cares.” she says with a smile. You let your hand up and Edward is now beside you.

“It’s good Y/N.” he says to you as he inspects it. You thank him even though you don’t fully believe him.

“Alright, you two. I have to hunt and by the time I get back, Jasper will be here.” she says to you both and you follow her out of the room.

“You’re not going?” you ask Edward after Alice had made her departure.

“I went when you and Alice were away.” he says. You nod. You cross your arms and your eyes go to his abandoned piano.

“What were you playing?” you ask. He doesn’t say anything immediately as he walks to the bench but doesn’t sit down.

“How about I teach you instead.” he says with a warm smile. You put your head slightly up and he chuckled at this.

“Come on, it’s easy.” he says as he gestures for you to come.

You flop down and stare at the keys. They were like a foreign language.

“I’m not going off of anything you say is easy.” you say as you turn your head to look up at him. He stared down with liquid gold eyes with amusement.

“A child can learn what I’m about to teach you.” he says as you turn back around as he stepped closer behind you.

“Place your fingers here.” he says and demonstrates with his own as he leaned his arms over your shoulder. You follow and you hold back your flinch from his fingers brushing briefly against yours. You sit up straighter with square shoulders.

His fingers press yours down and have you repeat the first sequence. You do so before he teaches you the next sequence and you do that before you start from the top.

“See?” he says as you play on your own. You never thought you would be able to play a song on the piano but, to be fair, it was easy. The notes weren’t complicated and the melody was simple.

After you play with ease, he suggest another set of notes to make it sound a bit better.

As you play around with it, you couldn’t help but softly ahh out at the fact that you were getting the hang of the instrument. He slowly reached back over and adds onto the melody that you were already playing. You both were now playing the piano together.

He retracted his arms and it makes you stop. You turn around and the prolonged eye contact that he gives you makes you nervous. You look down. He senses this and holds out his hand. You stare at it for a moment before taking it.

You shivered slightly as he held onto your hand and leads you to a room. His hand felt like a stone that you had picked up in cold weather.

Your body froze as you stared at the piece he had bought from you. It was nicely placed and it seemed to go really well with the room. You let your eyes travel about.

“This is your room?” you ask quietly and look to him. He nods. You hum a response.

“I can’t believe you bought it.” you say with a sly grin as you continued to look at. You had to admit, you were glad that your hard work didn’t go to waste.

“I just couldn’t resist.” he says. The room seemed like something was missing. You look around with furrowed eyebrows and he watched you.

He watched your face return back to neutral. He wanted to know what was on your mind as you were clearly thinking hard.

“What is it?” he asks.

“Oh..Nothing..” you say with a soft chuckle. It seemed embarrassing.

He brings out an encouraging grin, even subtly swinging the hand that was still attached to his, “Tell me.” You felt his thumb brush against the back of your hand. You look down and back up at him and his gaze back at you with a fond look.

“You don’t have a bed.” you say and he chuckles out and you continue, “But I forgot. You don’t sleep.” you say with a soft smile that came on your face without permission.

“You’re right.” he says to you.

“So like…Do you miss it?” you ask. You genuinely wanted to know. He leads you to a large plush chair that was in his room. He sits down and your hand is still attached to his as you look down at him. He tugs it slightly and you hesitate as you look at his lap.

You decide to sit on the arm of the chair, letting your legs and sock covered feet rest between his leg. You two are now close. You focus on breathing as you realize he never let go of your hand.

“I do now.” he tells you. You look at him in astonishment. You didn’t expect that answer.

“You do? I would figure that’s the part that didn’t really matter.” you say.

“Well.. I didn’t care too much for it..But…” he says but trails off. Silence fell in your ears and you look away from your piece that you were glancing at and look at his face.

“But what?”

“I wish I could dream.” he reveals in a voice that’s dripping in velvet.

“Hm…Fair…What would you dream about?” you asked him.

He then looks down a bit and you match his lax grin.

“Don’t leave me on a cliffhanger.” you say humorously.

“I don’t want to scare you away. That’s all.” he tells you softly.

“A little too late for that. I’m literally hanging with Dracula right now.”

He laughs out, even tilting his head back and you can see the glisten of his white teeth from the light.

“What do you dream about?” he asks. You shake your head and sigh a little, “Don’t change the subject.”

“If you tell me, I’ll tell you.” he says. You roll your eyes a bit, “You’re so unfair.”

“An eye for an eye.” he says with a grin.

You huff out a bit before you just shrug, “Random stuff really. I go on adventures in my dreams. If I were to make a movie about my dreams it would be a mind trip.”

He unclasps his hand from yours before reattaching it. You watch this.

“Come on.” you trail out encouragingly but softly as you see that he’s hesitating still. He swallows just a bit before speaking out, “This. Us. The things that we do.”

Your breath hitched. For some reason, you didn’t expect that to be his answer. You blink at him to see if he would joke or saying, “Just kidding.” but he doesn’t. He just waits for your reaction with his intense eyes.

“Wasn’t expecting that.” you replied with pursed lips as you were in thought. You get up, making sure to not let yourself stumble and wiggle your hand free from his.

You walk to a record collection of his and choose to look at that with your hands on your hips.

“I scared you away.” he states as he speaks over your shoulder.

You bark out a laugh, “That didn’t scare me.”

He picks up a record and you watch him as he shows it to you. He slides it out and placed it in the record player. You continue to watch him.

He turns back around to face you once the needle hits the track and the record spins. The melodic rhythm fills the room. He’s standing close in front of you and reaches down slowly to grab your hand again. This time you’re not shocked by the difference of the body temperature.

What you’re shocked about is the fact that he pulls you fluidly to him, he carefully placed your hands on his shoulders and he placed his on your waist. Feet started to move and you follow his. No words were said as the slow song played. It reminded you of a vintage romance movie. So much, that you swallowed from nervousness.

You see a mirror and you catch the reflection. It looked like a romantic painting. You didn’t know how to feel about that, as you didn’t know if you were overreacting.

You lightly huff out a tiny laugh and look down.

“What?” he asks as a small grin danced on his lips. You shake your head a bit, “I never thought I would…I don’t know…Slow dancing?”

“You haven’t done this with anyone else before?” he asks and you catch the slight surprise. You shake your head. Before you knew it, he lifts you a small twirl happens as you clutch onto him. You laugh a bit. He sets you back down on your feet with a warm smile, his finger slightly brushed the exposed skin from your shirt lifting a bit. Goosebumps appear and he takes one of your hands and hold it. He lifted you up as easily as one could lift a doll, placing you on your tippy toes on top of his feet.

He looks down at you and you look up at him. He looks content. As if he could look at you all day. Thoughts are empty as you watch him lean closer and closer slowly. You were almost to his height this way, so he didn’t have to move too far. He placed a kiss on your cheek. You jerk from surprise but luckily he holds you up in a firm hold.

“I’m sorry.” he whispers out, his eyebrows are knitted together.

“I…” you just say but you couldn’t think of anything to say. You were ashamed that a spark was felt on your cheek. You felt guilty.

He sets your feet to the floor and steps back. An apologetic look is on his face.

“I’m gonna use the restroom.” you quietly say with your head down.

In the mirror, the reflection reached and the fingertips touched the touched cheek. You let your eyes fall with your hand.

You reach into your back pocket and pull out your phone. There was nothing. Still no texts, no calls, or even an attempt to reach out. You shove it back into your pocket.

You walk out and you catch Edward brooding in his chair. His eyes lift up to you standing in his room. Your hands rest on your arms as you watch him.

“I’m sorry.” he says again and looked like he wanted to kick himself.

You shrug, “It wasn’t on the lips.” He doesn’t say anything but doesn’t take his eyes away from yours.

You sit back onto the arm of the chair, just like how you previously were.

You place both arms on your knees as you both stare at each other. You watch as he graced his fingers on your hand.

“You don’t know how good it feels to do this without my throat severely burning.” he says softly. You nod in understanding.

“I have to confess something.” he then says.

You take his hand fully. Hoping it was enough for him to spit it out. It was.

“I did have a breakup with Bella…”

You snort, “Why did you lie?”

“I felt foolish…That meant that I had to come to terms that I agreed to a relationship with the greatest prey a predator could ever come across. Her blood sang to me.” he says.

“What does that mean?” you ask.

“Her blood was like a siren to vampires. It smelled sweeter than most. More mouthwatering than most.” he says and sucks in a breath he didn’t have to take, “I couldn’t be with someone like that….It’s not like that with you.”

“My blood sucks.” you joke quietly. Edward forms a slight grin.

“I don’t even think of your blood. I just think of you and what you do.”

“Yeah, right. You’re only just saying that because I’m immune to your power.”

“Not completely immune. I can see the colors that try to merge with each other. I love your mind….With Bella I just read nothing. Pure nothing.” he reveals.

“Answer me this.” you say and he says to you, “Anything.”

“What did Alice see? Remember I asked you what else did she see? I know you lied, Edward.” you say.

“This will scare you away definitely.” he says with a nervous smile.

You throw your arms slightly up to gesture to your surroundings. You give him a humorous look.

“A kiss on the cheek scared you.” he teases. You then playfully nudge his chest.

“Stop being chicken.” you say as you wait for him to continue.

“She saw….Y/N can we please talk about something else?”

“Noooooo.” you say.

He huffs a bit but you patiently wait.

“She saw our future together. That’s all I will say.” he says and rises up. You follow him.

“Was it good or bad?” you ask him.

“Neither.” he answers and you both are back in the living room, “It was great.”

“W…What about…” you start but shake your head and sit on the large sofa.

“What about what?”

“Paul. Does that mean I broke up….With him?” you ask.

“With the way we were acting, I hope so.” he says with a bit of hesitance as he sits next to you.

“We….were doing something dirty?!” you ask nervously.

He chuckled, “Get your mind out of the gutter.” he taps your temple a bit in a playful way, You roll your eyes a bit.

Alice comes in right in tow with Jasper. Jasper smiles and says hello to you. You greet him back.

“Congratulations, Y/N. Your piece really was amazing.” he says to you. You smile and thank him.

Alice tugs his arm, tugging him away with a smile you knew all too well. Edward rises and you look up at him.

“They’re about to go at it.” he says with a slight grimace and jerks his head to the front door. This actually made you chuckle.

You get up quickly and he hands you your jacket. You both agree on walking.

Side by side, the pace match each other’s.

“I didn’t know how much I was impacted by your presence until you were only gone for two days.” he told you.

“What do you mean?”

“I thought I was going mad…Who told you to wrap me around your finger?” he says as the arm of his jacket brushed against yours. You didn’t mind. You weren’t focused on that, you were focused on with what he was saying.

“You’re annoying.” you say with a soft smile.

“I’m serious.” he says to you, displaying his own smile.

“Was I…Happy? In the vision.” you wonder.

“I’m guessing so. Do you smile when you’re not happy?”

You shake your head.

You both look at books. You both talk about what you both find is interesting. He takes you to get something to eat.

He steadily holds the spoon as you lean forward and capture it in your mouth.

“Is it possible for someone like you to overeat?” you wonder after you sit back in your seat. You didn’t want to say it out too loud in public.

“Yeah. It’s like a weird liquidy feeling inside.” he says with a crooked grin.

You raise your hand to get the spoon back. He didn’t want to give it back.

“I can feed myself.” you say with a grin.

“I..Like this.” he says with a content grin and waits for your reaction. When you don’t give him one, he scoops a bit of your food onto the utensil again and holds it out for you to take a bite. You only have to lean forward just slightly since you both were already in close proximity.

“What did you do while I was away?” you ask.

“The usual.” he shrugs. He continued to stare for a moment before saying, “It definitely felt like something….Or someone was missing.”

“You’re saying that to make me feel important.” you say with a grin.

His face is serious, “I’m serious.” he says. The spoon softly clatters back onto your dish. He takes your hands that are resting close to him on the table. Both thumbs scrape against the back on your hands. The butterflies that came scared you.

You retract your hands and look down.

“What is it?” he asked feeling confused. You don’t say anything but the waitress comes back over with a smile asking how the everything was, you let Edward answer as you take small bites of the rest of your food.

“Everything is fine. We can get the check.” he says to her but he doesn’t look at her. He just watched you.

She leaves and he calls your name, even going as far as covering the hand that’s still on the table.

“We have to stay friends. Nothing more.” you say with a shaky voice.

“So we’re friends. I thought you hated me.” he teases and as much as you didn’t want to, you laugh a little at his statement.

“I hate no one.” you say.

“If we’re friends, does that mean I can still see you?” he asks you.

You push your empty plate away from you slightly and just give him a glance. You lift a shoulder up slightly as you felt nervous.

“Am I that boring?” he asks plainly. You lean forward a bit, “No.” you say with a chuckle.

“I want to be honest. I know I lied to you about Bella and I’m sorry. You’ll get nothing but the truth from me.” he says.

“It’s okay. At least you told me before I found out in a different way. I want to be honest too. I don’t know where I am with Paul and I don’t want to complicate things.” you admit.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Go ahead.”

“Do you enjoy the time that we do spend together?” He asks as he holds your eyes in his.

You held it in. You didn’t admit nor deny. You both stared intensely at each other. The waitress then comes and gives Edward the bill back.

“Ride or walk?” he asks you.

You shrug as you look at him.

You ended up going home. The ride home had a tense cloud but it was expected. You call Paul again and again. You call one more time and he picks up the phone.

“Yes, Y/N.” The voice is annoyed.

“Hey.” you say into the line.

“What do you want.” he said flatly. It had no energy. You knew that you were the cause of that.

“I just wanted to check up on you.” you say in a small voice.

“I’m fine.” he just says and you wait to see if he would speak again. He doesn’t.

You finally say something, “I know you’re mad at me.”

“I’m not doing this over the phone.” he says impatiently.

“What you’re doing is being an ass right now. I just want to talk.” you say feeling frustrated.

“Talk? Talk for what? You’re going to always do your own thing anyway.” he says.

“You’re so cold and for what?” you ask him in disbelief as a pang hits your chest.

“Now, I’m cold.” he says sarcastically and huffs out a laugh, “I can’t do this.”

You stand up and grit out, “Can’t do what?” Your anger rise. You refused to believe that he was serious. “Can’t do what?!” you ask louder.

“What’s the point in trying to be with someone who always goes against you? Who doesn’t love you back? Who doesn’t seem to care about the connection that’s shared? I’ve tried Y/N. I’m tired Y/N. You want to talk about cold, it’s you. You know and I both know that you’re not even coming back.” he spits out.

“Unfair. You don’t love me. You don’t talk to someone you love like that, threatening breakup-“

“Save the bullshit. I did! I wouldn’t say shit like that to someone I don’t love. You don’t love me. It’s all one sided. You’re so fucking blind to see it. Wake up!”

“Did? So, the times that I went against everyone just to be with you, didn’t matter huh?”

“You know what I mean and you wouldn’t have to give a fuck about everyone if you knew what you wanted in the first place. One minute, you make it seem like I’m your priority and the next, you make it seem like I’m not. You don’t even know what you want.”

“I do. I do.” you say as the silent tears fall onto the wooden floor.

“You don’t.”

“I know what I want. I want someone who’s not going to control me. It’s like you’re ruining this for me on purpose. It’s always your way or ‘we’re done’ well guess what? Let me give you your way. I’m tired of you always threatening me. If you want us to be done, fine. We’re done.” you choke out and press the end call. You throw your phone down on the ground in an angry grunt.

The phone vibrates and you pick it up. You slide your finger on to the screen and he immediately starts talking, “First of all, no one is controlling you and second, just remember that it’s you who wants to end things shitty. Then, you’re gonna fucking hang up on me? Talking about how we’re done?”

“Oh, now you care!” you say as you pace, “I haven’t even heard from you! You can’t do this remember!” you say angrily in the phone, taking it away from your ear to speak directly into the speaker.

“I’m not fucking doing this. This is toxic. I fucking can’t.” he says.

“You’re toxic. You’re cancer. I cared about you and you didn’t care back unless you need your dick wet. That’s the reason why you want me home. This imprint is just an excuse for you and your wolf to dominate me.” you hiss out.

“Look at how you’re fucking talking…Cared?…..” he grits out.

“I’m not being stuck in La Push just to make you happy. You know what? Just because you can’t leave doesn’t mean you get to take it out on me! Us living together isn’t working. I don’t even want to come back….To your house. I want a boyfriend not a father!”

He hears your angry breathing as you pace.

“My house….You’re talking crazy. I bet you don’t have an answer on when you’re coming home. You’re doing this shit on purpose. You know that Larry said you can come home but you’re going off of some psychic leech who doesn’t give a fuck about you except for your blood.” After a beat, he speaks again, “You cashed that leech’s money, didn’t you?” he says menacingly. You didn’t recognize this person on the phone. He didn’t recognize the person on his line.

You not saying anything told him the answer.

“Bye, Y/N.” he says.

Click.

You stare at the screen. It cracked. You groan and throw it down again. But, harder. You slowly say on the bed, staring at the wall, your adrenalin comes down. Reality sets in. You realized your fuck up. Your face crumbled.

Face down, you angrily cry into your mattress. Your body and your shoulders shake. You never been this mad before. You cry about the cruel things that you said. You couldn’t take them back. You think about the cruel things that he said. He couldn’t take them back.

He told you he loved you, but you felt that there was no way he could never love you after tonight.

With a pounding headache, the morning light flashed you. Your phone didn’t work anymore. The screen was discolored and cracked, you couldn’t see anything on it. You just cried. You slept when you felt sad. You couldn’t explain the heaviness that you felt.

A knock scared you, making you jerk out of your sleep. You ignored it. They kept knocking.

Swinging the door open, you don’t say anything but stare at the person in front of you. They saw that you had on the same clothes from yesterday but they were wrinkled on your body.

They step closer and you step back and close the door. Their foot wouldn’t let you.

“I’m worried.”

“Don’t be.” you hiss out.

“Me and Alice tried calling you.” Edward says.

“My phone is broken.”

“Just please tell me what’s wrong. I won’t say anything and will let you talk.”

“I. don’t. want. to. talk.”

“Can I at least get your phone fixed?”

“I don’t want it anymore.” you say and leave the door and go to grab it from your bedroom floor from where you discarded it.

You walk back to his body and put it in his hand roughly.

“Keep it.” you say.

“You said we can be friends. Why won’t you let me help you as a friend?” he asks you as he peered down at you.

“There’s nothing you can do.” you say in defeat and looked down. He slides the no good phone into his pocket.

He places two hands on your shoulders and pull you to him. You frown a bit until your head is now on his chest. He just holds you to him without saying anything.

“How did this happen?” the worker asks you. You take in a small breath as you start to feel embarrassed, Edward places a hand on your back.

“I threw it down. I was angry.” you just say.

“The screen is absolutely no good. It needs a replacement.” the worker says as they inspect it some more.

“No need to fix it. I’ll just get a new one.” you mutter. You then follow them to pick it out. He gives you your old sim card and gives you the bag that contained your new device. Before you could pull your card fully out of your wallet, Edward’s chip is already stuck in the machine.

You both are in no rush. He carried your box after discarding the bag.

“You’ve done enough.” you say as you face him before going inside of your own place.

He placed a hand on your arm and it halts you. He searched your face for a moment.

“What really happened? Why were you upset?” he asks you softly.

You look up at the sky.

“I ruined everything.” you say flatly.

“Do you want to talk about it? I do have forever.” he says, trying his best to bring humor into it.

“No.” you say as you then look down. “I need to be by myself.”

You walk away.

You stared at the glowing phone in your hand. It’s the most you’ve been called from the pack. The most was from Sam, your stomach dropped at the fact. You turn your phone off. You didn’t want those emotions to spill out again.

The only that open in your art room was the window. You just let it out in there. You had no direction as you worked. It was all impulse.

A stretched canvas was covered by the time sky was dark. You didn’t care that your hands and your back was hurting. The theme was self hatred. The theme was self sabotage. The theme was loss.

You sit down and put your head to your knees, starting to cry some more.

When you woke up, you winced as you rose up from the hard floor. Your hands and fingers were stained by you didn’t care. The same clothes from a day prior were once again on your body.

You felt too ashamed to look into the mirror. Under the water, the same thought floated through your mind.

“What am I going to do?”

You sat on the bench, finishing a hot sandwich. Eating it on autopilot, you stared at the same spot in front of you.

You feel your phone in your pocket buzz and pull it out half heartedly.

“Yeah.” you say, lacking any emotion.

“Y/N, what the hell is going on?” the voice coated in authority.

“A lot. I don’t want to talk right now.”

“If not now, then when? We have to talk. Paul fucking snapped.”

“It’s what he always does. As soon as he doesn’t get his way. The one time I’m doing something for me it’s a problem. I’m here for work and I need to focus.”

A pause soon took place before Sam talked again, “There’s still a chance to resolve both of you guys’ issues. Now, you do have to come home so you both can talk and work it out. You’re his imprint.”

“His. It’s all about him, I guess.”

“Y/N, don’t be like that. This isn’t like you. It feels like I’m talking to a completely different person. What’s really going on?”

“Nothing! Oh, I know. Everyone’s trying to parent me instead of letting me live my life. My dream was to always do this. With or without Paul. I thought the imprint was about him making sure I am happy too?”

“It is. No one’s trying to parent you. However, Paul is in bad shape. I want you both to really get through this and not fall apart. Especially not right now.”

“Too late. We said too much that we both can’t even come back from. I’ll talk to you later.” you say. Sam calls your name but you hang up. You put your phone back into your pocket.

The next few days, seemed like a daze. You only remember bits and pieces. Like Emily calling you. That’s how you knew, it was definitely over.

As you got dressed for a dinner meeting with Larry, a knock hits your door. You open it and it’s Alice.

You both talk as she zipped you up from the back.

“It’s really over.”

“I’m sure it’s not.” she says, throwing your idea away.

“He got Emily to help him move my stuff out.” you say flatly.

Alice pauses and looks at you from behind before standing in front of you.

“Are…You okay?”

“Life keeps on going.” you say with a soft shrug. She then wraps her arms around you.

You watched as Larry talked loud with a man that he knew for years. He owned his own high profile gallery and wanted to know if Larry stumbled across any talent.

Larry brought you.

You didn’t drink leisurely. But you did tonight.

“I know she has something done. Y/N.” Larry calls to you. You look at him. He’s wearing a humorous smile, he was tipsy.

“You got something done?” he asks you and you nod and he laughs nudging the client who’s very pleased.

“Bring what you got into my office tomorrow.” he says. You nod.

What you brought, he liked. He actually vocally loved it. You forced a soft smile to be polite. He shook your hand and offered to buy it off of you.

“How much do you want for it?” he asks as Larry sits on the edge of his office desk, hands in his pockets. The man had an elbow resting on his hand as he looked at the work you did.

“Um…” you say as you look at it, “Whatever you can give me.”

He was generous. Too generous. Your eyes bulge out of your sockets at the amount of 0’s. Larry and the person who paid you, shook each other’s hand with a smile. They promised each other to catch up with each other soon.

Coming out of the office, you stopped past your apartment to get your book. You didn’t want to be stuck in the boxed home. The wind wasn’t blowing too bad.

You were entrapped into the storyline of your book. You hear faint movement from the small table you were sitting at. You look up to see liquid gold staring back at you. You look back down to the words.

“Congratulations on your piece being sold.” he says.

“Thanks.” you mutter.

Some time slowly went past as you tried to concentrate back onto your book but you just couldn’t. You get up and Edward thought you were leaving. You instead went to a table that had a puzzle laid out. You focused on that.

He slides the piece that you were looking for in your direction. You stare at it. You sigh. He doesn’t say anything.

“What do you do when you want to crawl into a hole and die?” you ask him quietly as you snapped the piece into place.

“I just go away for a while.” he answers.

“Maybe, that’s what I need to do.” you mused.

“Maybe.” he says back.

He speaks again, “I’m going to Ithaca again. Would you come?”

You look at him. He’s waiting for your answer.

“I have nothing else better to do.”

A night of sleep later, you watch the road in front of you as he drives on it.

You were surrounded by hugs and talks of how happy they were to see you.

“Surprised that Alice isn’t here.” Esme says.

“Her and Jasper decided to stay back.” Edward answers.

“How long will you be with us?” Carlisle asks with a smile as he looked down at the bag that Edward was carrying.

“It’s just for a breather.” Edward says.

“It’s not much, but thank goodness there’s a bed for you to sleep in.” Esme says as she guides you up the grand stairs, into a spare bedroom. It was very spacious.

“I appreciate this. Thank you.” you say.

“Just let me know if I can help you with anything.” she says. You nod and she starts to leave but you say, “Wait.” She stops in the doorway, eager to hear what you have to say.

You hesitate but her eyes were warm enough for you to feel comfortable enough to continue, “How….How do you get over feeling heart broken? This is the real reason for the getaway.” you say in a small voice. She steps in and has a sympathetic look on her face.

She extends her arms out and you step in them. She rubs your back as you hug her back.

“Just feel it and then let it go.” she says. You both step back and look at each other. You nod in understanding. She touches your arm in a gentle manner.

You sketch in your book with your knees up as you sat on the bed. It was causal. You let your mind feel and run through the memories of you and Paul. You let yourself feel the emotions and the feelings that wanted to overflow.

You hear your name being called and you jerk from being startled.

“Scared me.” You say to Edward’s figure in the doorway.

“You scared me. I’ve been calling your name.” he says.

You pause as you look at him.

“You have?” you ask. He nods. You watch as he moves closer into the room. He sits on the edge of your bed.

“You can talk to me if something’s wrong.” he says.

You set your book aside and you watch as his eyes couldn’t help but flicker to the open page.

“It’s not finished yet.” you say to him.

“I wouldn’t have been able to tell.” he says bringing out a soft grin. Nothing is said for a moment.

“See anything? Read anything?” you ask and point to your temple. He nods a bit.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” he says sympathetically. The way he says it made it seem like he was the one who hurt you.

“What doesn’t kill us really makes us stronger.” you say, chuckling a bit at the cliché.

“You are strong.” he comments quietly.

In the kitchen, you stood next to Edward as you watch him stand at the island as he pours piping hot water over a tea bag that’s resting in a tea cup.

He slides you the cup and the small bowl of sugar cubes.

It was only you and Edward in the living room after you had drunken your tea. It soothed your throat. The television wasn’t on. You both talked.

“So…He just moved your stuff out?” he asks quietly.

“Yeah. A friend of mine helped him and…Everything’s back at my family’s home.”

“How come you never really talk about your family?”

You shrug.

“I don’t know. Plus, they’re always so busy.” you answer. The times that they were there, they would be so tired from working that you felt bad to bother them. You knew it was so you could live comfortably. But, you missed that family orientation. The pack gave you that, but you didn’t know if that was even on the table still.

“Is that what made you like doing art so much?” he asks. You nod.

“I was a lonely kid. Art was always my friend.” you say.

“When you moved out, was it a relief to them?” he asks.

“Not a relief but, they were just glad that I found someone who made me happy.” you say. You look to him.

“You don’t have to answer, but since changing, do you miss your real parents?” you ask.

Edward mused, he spoke out, “Yes. But, I know that my mother was on her last breath begging Carlisle to save me.”

“She knew?” you ask surprised.

“I’m not sure if I’m quite honest.” he answered.

“Were you the only child?” you ask. He nods.

“This might be random but since you’re who you are…Are you able to have children with someone?” you ask.

“No.” he answers. You’re confused.

“I have nothing but venom through my body. Excluding the blood from when I feed.”

“Wow.” you say.

“Would you want children in the future?” he asks.

You shrug, “They’re a lot of responsibility. So, I’m not sure.”

“And expensive.”

You give him a look, “I think that’s the last thing you have to worry about.”

He makes smiles a bit, “Still, we can’t leave that part out.”

“What about you? Would you want children if you could have them?” you ask and he looks at you while you ask this question.

“With the right person.” he answers.

Rosalie enters the room, she takes a glance at you. “What are you doing still up?”

“It’s early.” you say.

“It’s the middle of the night.” she says.

“What? I can’t be apart of the party?” you ask. She grinned at this.

“I heard talks about children we can’t have.” she says as she sits down in a chair facing the both of you.

“You wanted a family?” you ask. She nods. You then find out that she’s a New York native.

“What part?” you ask.

“Rochester.” she says. You nod in acknowledgment. You all fall into casual talk and you see the sibling dynamic between Rosalie and Edward. The bantering between them were tossed back and forth.

You started to yawn. You rise up. Edward followed you with his eyes.

“Goodnight, Rosalie.”

“Goodnight. Or should I say good morning.” You both smile at each other.

You turn to Edward who’s watching you in a relaxed state. You lightly smother your hand on his that was resting on the arm of the sofa. You peer down at him as he looks up to you.

“Goodnight, Edward.”

“Goodnight.” he says with a warm smile.

You slept until you hear a knock on your door. You sit up and rub your eyes with the soft, warm blanket.

“Come in.” you say in your morning voice and yawn. You open your eyes from your yawn to Edward holding a breakfast platter.

“You didn’t have to do this.” you say as he placed the platter over your legs.

“It was nothing.” he says. As you ate, he asked, “Are you feeling better?”

You slowly chewed, “It will take time.”

Edward took your empty dishes and told you, “We should be back soon. Me and the others are going out to hunt.” You nod.

You get ready for the day, shaking your head at the fact that Alice snuck in some clothes. You then lounge while reading a book.

Your mind started to trail off and you started thinking of Paul again.

“Just let it go.” you say in your head as you closed your eyes.

But you couldn’t. You still felt the connection there.

You call Jared.

“Y/N, Y/N, Y/N.” he says as he picks up the phone. The voice wasn’t happy. He was disappointed.

You sigh a bit, “Hey.”

“You know you fucked uo right?”

“I know….Wheres Paul?” with deep shames

“He hasn’t been here in days. He won’t shift back.”

You sit up straighter, “Have him call me. I know I said things I didn’t mean and I really want to apologize to him.”

“I think…That’s not going to work.” he says.

“Why not?”

“He played back everything and I saw everything. Y/N, you really broke his heart. You’re all that he had. You of all people should know that. I really can’t believe you.”

“Yes.”

“Hold up.” he says and it’s silent. However, he’s still on the line. Your heart pounds in your ears.

“Yeah.” It was blunt. No feelings.

You open your mouth to say sorry, but you felt like it wasn’t enough. You close it back. You let out a breath that he hears. He then speaks again.

“Y/N. We have to be apart.”

Your heart felt like it was being squeezed.

“I know that you know that you know that your stuff is back with your family.” There was no ill intent in his voice.

“Yes.” you say.

“I’m going to let you do your career. I won’t hold you back. You do you and I’ll do me. Whether you hate me or not, I’m still your protector. You won’t have to worry about me stepping on your toes, Y/N.”

“I don’t hate you.” you whisper as you hold your head.

“But, I’m gonna go ahead and go.” he says and before you could finish saying okay, Jared was back on the line.

You don’t know how you stayed with your head down with your forearms on your knees, but you sit up when the room light turns on.

You blink. Rosalie stares at you.

“Everything alright?” she asks from the doorway.

“Time will tell, then I would know.” you say.

She furrows her eyebrows in thought. She took in the statement.

Edward watched as you followed Rosalie. You walked down the steepness of the wooden stairs into the garage.

You just look around as the shiny cars and she stops in between two cars.

“Which one is yours.”

“Both of them.”

“Nice.” you say.

You sat on a stood as you watched swiftly clean the car. Still slow enough to have something to do in order to talk to you.

“So it was Edward, then you, then Emmett, Alice, and then Jasper.” you say after she tells you about her. She told her truth. She liked being human.

“Yeah.” she says lightly as she treated the task with such diligence. However, it looked like an editorial photo shoot for a magazine.

“You learn any of this stuff in college?”

“From high schools and universities that I have graduated from of course. Electrical engineering, astrophysics, and business, degrees in all of them.” She says with a soft smirk, “Also, I help keep Carlisle up to date on the latest advancements since so I also studied medicine.” She’s proud of herself. She looks to you.

“Busy and brilliant.” you comment. You were impressed. She softly flips her hair without any hands, only a little at that statement.

“When my future car gets messed up, I know right who to come to.” you day and she laughs lightly.

“Or buy another one.” she says with a grin.

“Nah, I would just hold onto it. It has to be on its last leg in order for me to just buy another one.”

“I heard your birthday was coming up. Have any ideas of what you’re going to do?” she asks.

“No idea. Most likely spend the day by myself and treat myself.”

Her chuckle kind of caught you off guard as she looks at you.

“What?” you ask.

“I doubt you will be by yourself.” she points out with a soft grin.

“Well….Definitely can’t go home for my birthday.” you say sadly.

“There’s more to do here than….There.”

“Im supposed to listen to the native who won’t show me around her city?” you tease and you saw her white teeth flash.

“I will show you around. But, me and Emmett are getting married again soon.”

“How sweet.” you comment with a sappy smile as you slowly spin while sitting on the stool.

As you move through the home, you hear Emmett’s loud booming voice.

“Come on!”

He was intently watching the television as people in hard helmets were tackling one another on the field with a brown football. There was a significance in the scores, you were guessing the team Emmett was rooting for was losing. You watched this until the announcer transitions into a commercial break.

He starts to vent to Carlisle about how it’s a shame that his team was losing to “horrible players.” Carlisle lip turns up only a little at his son’s frustration with the sport. He then turns and sees that you’re watching the scene.

“You seen that right?” Emmett asks you. You nod.

Carlisle chuckles as Emmett starts talking to you about interceptions and you just stare at him as you were never really into football. But, you still nod and hum out responses as he talks with his hands. The sound of the game resuming from break makes him then turn back around and watch the screen.

You feel something in your hand and you look down. Then back up to Edward’s soft expression.

“Esme wants to check up on you.”

He leads you through the home and into Esme’s workspace. Blueprints of architectural drawings were spread out on her desk. She looks up with warmth as she sees your face.

You move in closer as her maternal nature made you feel at ease.

“Are you okay?” she asks in concern. You nod.

“Did you think about what we talked about?” she asks.

“Yes.”

Edward looks between you two and he doesn’t hide his quizzical expression. Esme softly laughs at this as she takes a look at his face.

“This is girl talk, Edward.” she states to him. You didn’t notice that his hand was holding yours until he had to remove himself.

With him gone, you reveal your phone call to Jared. You kept it discreet as possible due to his super hearing, but you were thankful that she was able to read between the lines.

“I was all that he had. The guilt feels worse than the words that were being said.” you say.

For him to be their mortal enemy, she doesn’t show it as she genuinely says, “I’m sorry.”

Then subject smoothly changes as you point out her home renovation plans. You find out that’s what she likes to do.

“I have degrees in art and photography as well.” she says.

“I’m mad, you never told me you had a degree in art.” you tease and she chuckles.

“Yup. I’m so impressed with you though. You’ve never been to college but yet here you are knocking things out of the park like a pro. You really have a gift.” she says.

“Thanks.” you say.

“Edward has to bring you around more often so that we can have our own little art session. Maybe you can teach me a thing or two.” she says and you shake your head, “Me teach you?”

She smiles, “You’re doing something that I’m definitely missing.”

“An art session would be nice.” you say and she’s pleased with this statement. You look down at the blueprints of interior and exterior designs that were at her fingertips.

“I designed this home.” she says and you’re impressed as you really look around. You make note to take a closer look of the home when you leave her workspace.

“Did you design the home in Washington?” you ask. She nods.

“When I saw the house for the first time, I just kept thinking about how good the build was. It was impressive.” you say.

“I appreciate that. I actually would like to design a home for you.”

“No, no, no need.” you say but she overpowered your statement with, “Yes. And I want to.” with a smile.

“Why are you guys so…Welcome? Especially to me…A human.”

“I can’t speak for anyone else but, me and also Carlisle see how happy you make our dear Edward.”

Your stomach drops and you stutter out, “Oh, um…Me and Edward are just friends that’s all.” You say fidgeting with the small magnetic balls that rested on her desk.

“Well, you’re a good friend to him. He’s more lively around us instead of usual brooding self. Oh, you should see the look on his face when we ask about you.”

You nervously chuckle as the small ball clacked softly with the other one, her actions reminded you of a mother who was embarrassing you.

You ate a bowl of soup as you listened to Emmett get mad at the television that contained the players who tiredly walked with their hands on their hips.

“A loser team beat them. A team that doesn’t come close to their record at that!”

You softly chuckle as you know how that feels. You didn’t expect Edward to enter in. You nod your head in acknowledgment at his presence.

“And Esme wants me to bring you around more often.” he says as the bickering continues.

With a soft grin, “That doesn’t bother me.” You then look at him watching you and you continue with narrowed eyes, “You weren’t supposed to be listening in our girl talk.”

He taps to his ear, “You know I can’t help it.”

“You could’ve…I don’t know. Ran off somewhere.” You shrug as the spoon touch your lips.

“Run where?” he asks.

“Like I would know. You know this place better than me.”

“I want to show you something tomorrow.” he says.

“If it’s bad, I’ll pass.” you say.

A melodic chuckle rings out that makes you look at him, “It’s nothing bad. Why do you always think of the worst?”

“To brace myself for impact.”

“I impact you?”

“Not too much.” you say at his smile.

He takes your empty bowl away as soon as your spoon sets down. He comes back when you move off of the chair.

“Are you up for another match?” he asks you as you move into the living room.

“Another match of what?”

He puts an arm around you and steers you to the small table with the chess pieces sitting tall. You give him a look. He looks back.

“I’m not going to do you like that. I whooped you so bad last time.” you say and you couldn’t help but grin when you heard Emmett’s abrupt laugh.

“You were scared during the entire first part of the game. Don’t get cocky now.” Edward teases.

He sits down and you flop down at the small table in the corner.

He was in charge of the black pieces and you were the white.

“Ready when you are.” he says as you were supposed to make the first move.

You do so. He was relaxed. You stare as he move his piece without hesitation.

You move again and he moves after you.

You stare at the board in disbelief. Your jaw was dropped, he beat you in the matter of four moves. You didn’t know how it was possible.

He takes a finger to move your mouth up to close it.

“Keep the flies out, shall we?”

You nudge his hand which makes him laugh. You rise up and he calls for you to sit back down. You shake your head slightly and move to walk past him to the staircase but he lightly grabs your hand with both of his.

You halt your steps but you don’t look at him.

“I didn’t know you had a sore loser attitude.” he says and humor is coating his tone.

“Whatever. It’s still 1-1.” you say.

“I’ll go easy this time.” he says and this makes you look at him. He’s enjoying this. You playfully roll your eyes. You let him lead you to him as he softly tugs you. You peer down at him.

“It’s just a game Y/N.” he speaks out.

“You think I don’t know that?” you say to him. You feel his fingertips caress your hand as you say this to him. He doesn’t say anything as a warm smile dance on his features.

“Maybe we should end it here. I won so you got me back.” you suggest. You tried to keep your voice even as best as you could.

“You know you’re the only person I can play against fairly.”

He laughs at your loathing expression at the thought of another game.

“Please?” he bells out. You sigh as you look at his face.

“Will it get you to leave me alone?” you ask without any weight as you then take a seat across from him. Your legs brushed his and he didn’t mind. He instead set the pieces back on the right place on the board without rushing.

“I’m not sure about all of that.” he says with a crooked grin.

You both didn’t finish the game. He savored it out to the point where you resigned from the match. The amount of pieces you both had were equal to each other and you know that he did it on purpose.

“This doesn’t mean you win.” you say.

“It’s a tie anyways.” he says with a grin.

“I’m going to bed.” you say. You noticed that the others weren’t in the living room with you and Edward.

“It’s still early.” he says as you rise up and he rises too. He takes your hand again, “Watch something with me.” he persuades.

“Another vintage movie?” you ask as you let him lead you to the spacious couch.

“It doesn’t have to be.” he says.

“I was just teasing.” you say. He relaxes as you sit down next to him.

He was impatient as you ate breakfast the next morning. You raise your eyebrow at him as softly drummed his fingers on the table as you took your last bites.

“Ready to go?” he asks as soon as you put your dish in the sink.

“I just got done.” you say with your hands up defensively.

You didn’t expect him to lean forward and zip your coat up for you when you were finished putting your arms through the jacket.

You watch him as he then takes your hand, leading you outside of the home. Before you knew it, you were on his back as he ran with such blurred speed.

The wind wasn’t blowing as bad as you thought it would be. The landscape looked as if it were untouched. You greedily took it all in as you were sliding off of him.

You take steps forward as it was spacious. It looked as if it could go on forever and ever. The blooming plants made you forget that it was ever chilly outside.

You look to Edward, “How do you even-” you start but look ahead again as you answered your own question.

He interlaced his hand with yours and brought you down with him. You sat close next to him as you look at the joined hands.

Not taking your eyes away, “Do you remember what I said?”

“I could’ve ran off somewhere?” he asks you and you look at him as he grins. You lift the joined hands that never detached and nudge them against him and you say, “No. Not that.”

“Then what?” he says.

“That…You know….That we’re friends.” you say as you look down. You didn’t say it out loud loudly. A loud volume of words seemed to be out of place for a scenery like the one you were at.

“I know. My Dracula mind didn’t forget.” he says and you both breath out a soft chuckle.

He watched you however, stare at the hand that he was still holding. Your face was blank but he knew that you were thinking.

“Does this inspire you?” he asks you carefully.

“Anything does.” you say.

“So does that mean….I inspire you?” he asks. He meant it as a joke but his ears heard your heart thump an extra beat.

You instead stare at the distance. You didn’t see the happiness that danced on his face.

You look back down when you felt his hand let go of yours. He is sitting back with his elbows resting beside him.

You copy him. He turns his head to look at your face. It was pleased.

“Does this feel good? On your skin I mean.” you ask.

“The weather?” he asks in confirmation. You nod.

“So so.”

“Is that your version of my ‘it’s alright’ ?” you ask and you watch as his face is full of amusement.

“Nothing beats your ‘it’s alright’. You make it so obvious.”

“Is that so?” you ask sarcastically.

“Answer this then. What do you think about the time that we spend together?” he quizzes.

“Its……” you instinctively replied but you roll your eyes as his eyebrows raise with a smile. He was ready to laugh at you.

“It’s horrible. You’re the worst person to hang out with.” you say but his melodic laugh is being heard in your ears already.

“The worst person shows you the best places.” he comments as he stared at you.

“It’s not all that great.” you mutter but his amusement never faded.

He takes your hand again and lays down on his back. He placed your hand is placed on his hard chest. The chill of his skin made little goosebumps rise on your arm. You furrow your eyebrows as you stare at the soft material of his shirt.

“What are you thinking about?” he asks you as he watched you.

“I don’t know why it never occurred to me that you don’t have to breathe. Your chest doesn’t rise up and down like mine does.” you observe.

“We don’t have to. But, it’s uncomfortable for me.” he says.

“Uncomfortable, how?”

“It’s how I sense my surroundings. Plus, it’s a familiar action.”

You nod.

“You’re so warm.” he comments.

“You’re so cold.” you comment back as he then slides your hand up to his cheek. It felt like you were touching a statue.

You couldn’t help but to feel with your hand. He lets you. Your fingers trace the smoothness of his cheek before you slide them slowly down to his jawline. His blinking starts to slow.

You had to admit, the longer your hand was on his skin, the surface of it didn’t feel freezing. Your body temperature adjust to the touch. You peer down as your hand was now rising on his forehead. Slightly hooded eyes stared back at you with such intensity, in the pit of your stomach a wave of sensational energy violently fluttered about. Your hand slides up and disappears into his hair and you pull your hand away like it was fire. You didn’t expect it to feel like rich silk. Sitting up fast but nervously, you try to keep your breath even.

“Something wrong?” he asks as your eyes wildly look everywhere but him.

“Are you sure you weren’t dazzling me?” you softly ask with your eyes closed. You sit with your knees up to your chest. He sits up as well, he’s forearms rest against his knees. He’s very close and tilts his head to have a better look at your face.

“No. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

You don’t look at him.

“Is that why you’re scared to look at me?” he asks quietly but it sends a chill in your ear.

You slowly turn your head to his direction but your eyes are still down. Your eyes watched as he didn’t have to wear a jacket, traveling up his shoulder, that’s when seen a glint hit his exposed neck. It reminded you like a gem. You let your eyes travel up more, you mentally kick yourself for them to land at his lips, because when you look up into his set of eyes, his gaze is on yours as well. It’s very in tune. A look of yearning that almost scared you.

You were afraid to react, not out of fear, but you didn’t know how to react. Your breath changed its pattern when his hand slowly reached out. You eyes fluttered closed as you felt the soft but firm brush of the hook of his index finger traveling down your cheek. It was like he knew right where touch.

Without missing a beat, his finger hooked under your chin. A thumb follows, brushing across the bottom of your lip, which causes it to crack open just slightly. He hears the quiet but shaky that flowed out. You close the crack of your mouth and you blink. His hand now cradled the side of your face. You place a hand over his, matching your fingers up with his. It was as if he was trying to figure you out with the way he was looking.

His hand traveled down to the side of your neck. You keep looking ahead at him as he now holds the nape of your neck. Before you know it, he’s on his back from sitting up and your head is close to his chest. He holds you close this way. You place a hand on his chest, lifting your head lightly to look at him and he had a look of contentment. Your hand slides up his chest, all the way up to his cheek.

He turns his head and you close your eyes as you felt his lips brush the front of your throat. Your head moves down slowly as your forehead and now against his. Both of your eyes are closed, both of his eyes are closed. Noses touched.

You then open your eyes and sit up slowly. His hand falls majestically from the nape of your neck, now around your waist and you are on your side. You watch as his face looks and faces up to the sky. He breathes in and his eyes fall to a close.

You both take your time walking. You both brush against one another with the steps that were being taken.

He pushed open the door to the home that contained his family. Your arm is stretched from him tugging on your hand, the same hand he made sure to keep a hold of.

Your fingers are holding the white sheet on paper. The crease lines were still evident but you continue to stare at the drawing.

“You still have this.” you state as you continue to look at the photorealistic image in your hands.

“I keep it on me when you’re not around.” he states.

You’re eyes look up and a lax smile stretched on your features, “Like you miss me that bad.”

As you stand in front of him, paper in your hands, he’s sitting on the couch that’s in his room. His hands are on your leg as he looked up at you, “I even miss you when you’re asleep.”

His hand is smothered over your hand as it rests on the table. You ate the dinner that Esme learned to make. Her smile was big when you complimented it.

You sat against the headboard, knees up with your sketchbook resting in your lap. Your hand worked the page as you drew in colors. Putting your own twist to the field you saw today. The scenery being drawn gave you a sense of utopia.

You yawned as you felt your eyes droop. You turn off the lamp and drift off to sleep.

You felt something ticklish in your hand. You tossed and turned your head as you thought it was in your dream but your body gained consciousness. You blink open your eyes to see Edward’s fingers lightly touch yours.

You turn over and groan a little, “My mouth was open and everything.”

A light chuckle comes from him, “You’re fine.”

You sit up straighter on the headboard and he has a seat on the edge of your bed. He picks up the book that was resting beside you. You rub your eyes as he takes a long look.

“Is this the place we went yesterday?” he softly asks.

You pull the book from his hands as you felt a touch of embarrassment, you stuffed the feeling down as he looked at the new spot your set it at.

“It’s really good. You made it better than it actually is.” he says to you.

“No, that sight was amazing.” you disagree.

“That picture was amazing.” he says and you give him an amused look. You get out of bed.

In the sunroom, you lounged as you were focused in your sketchbook. You had received an email and Larry wanted to see if you could make another piece for his gallery to start the new month coming up, off to a great start.

You sketched of ideas but nothing seemed to stick.

You grunt as your brain ran out of ideas. It started to travel elsewhere. Your hands were craving something but you didn’t know what.

The others came back from hunting but Edward didn’t. You tried your best to not ask where he was, you felt like it would give something away if you did. You just didn’t know what.

That night, you helped Esme build minutare models of her interior designs that reflected her blueprint sketches.

You thought about making a minutare home like how you were helping Esme with but, you didn’t know how to amplify it. You wanted to make something so good that it shocked you.

“How was you and Edward’s outing yesterday?” Esme softly asks as she paints a mini chair in her hands.

“It was good, he showed me the most amazing field of nature where flowers bloomed. I drew what I saw. I have to show you.” you say.

“I would love to see it.” she comments as she sets the chair down to dry.

You silently paint a chair of your own until the question wouldn’t stop eating at your brain, “Where is he?”

“He told us he was making a quick trip. He told me to tell you that he will be back before you know it.”

You nod as you set down the chair to dry.

It was still early when you were woken up out of your sleep. You decide to use the bathroom and brush your teeth. You lay back down. You don’t want to head downstairs just yet.

You close your eyes. You hear the door creak open. You slowly open your eyes and see Edward smiling softly down at you. He’s sitting close to where you’re laying.

You sit your body up and before you could hesitate, you wrap your arms around him in a hug. He’s been gone for three days.

“Are…Are you alright?” you ask him as your chin rests on his shoulder.

His hand brushed your back, creating a chill down your spine.

“I am now.” he says.

You pull back and he watched you with a warm expression. His hand comes up to brush your cheek and your eyes immediately close with a flutter at the fact. You tried to calm your breathing from starting to shake.

You learned another song. This time you didn’t care about the trial and error. Your fingers flexed in the keys as you tried to play the full variation that he taught you. Edward sat next to you, his arm wrapped around your lower back with his hand resting on the outer part of your thigh.

Rosalie walks past, “You’re lucky Y/N. He acts funny when I ask to play his piano.”

“You play?” you ask impressed.

“She plays sometimes.” Edward brushed off.

“I’m the next musically inclined after you, Edward. Don’t start.” she seethed. A smile cracks your lips.

Esme allowed you to work in an art studio that she had. In under the condition of, “Please show me what you make.”

You forgot to close the door all of the way. As you paint the base colors on your canvas, you catch Edward walking in, in the corner of your eye.

You slow your movements, your mind focused on how you were being perceived.

His hands were in his pockets he watched you work without confidence.

“What about people watching you work make you nervous?” he asks.

You grip your wooden brush tighter in your hand as you blink at the material.

“I don’t know…It just happens to be that I do best when I’m alone.”

“When did you realize this?”

You turn your head at where he’s standing and grin, “I don’t know. Are you trying to distract me or something?”

“No. If I wanted to distract you, I would’ve done it by now.” he says. You roll your eyes playfully.

You kept smudging the colors, having to continue to redo sections over. You shook your head as you mumbled out disapproval statements. What seemed stressful to you, seemed like inspiration to him.

He sat in the room as he felt like it was a sight too see.

“Do you want to take a break?” he asks as he watched you wipe your forehead with the back of the long sleeve shirt you wore.

You shrug and turn the canvas around and stomp out. He follows you out. You stomp up the stairs. You try to close the bedroom door without looking but he kept it from shutting as he followed you.

You flopped across the bed on your stomach. Your head rest on your folded arms.

“Stop being so hard on yourself.” he speaks out.

“Edward, let me sulk.”

“Sulking isn’t going to make you finish.” he says with a hand resting on your back.

“It’s so bad, it would be a sin to approve of that.” you say in defeat.

“The only sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.”

He watched you sit up and look square at him.

“I know where you got that from.” you say.

He brings on a grin.

“Who?” he quizzed.

“Dostoyevsky. Now, this is a serious matter. I don’t want to work on my birthday.” you groan and lay back on your stomach.

”Pace yourself. Allow yourself to embrace your human flaws.”

“That’s not helping.” you say muffled as your face was down with defeat. There was silence. But your mind wasn’t.

He watched as you slowly rise and head back into the art studio as you left in. You cut up cardboard. You plug in a glue gun. You get to work.

Edward comes in right when you paint over the last bit of your newly designed piece. You feel him over your shoulder and is glad that the weight is off of yours.

“That looks like us.” he says.

“That’s because you want it to be.” you say to him but to be fair, you just did what you felt.

Esme stared at it in awe. The smile on her face looked proud in a way. It was so good, she gave you a hug.

You left the piece in there to dry and you tiredly rub your hands together underneath the running water. It was late into the night. You were able to head off upstairs for bed until you feel a hand tug your hand to guide you to the kitchen.

“I’m tired.” you softly whine.

“You haven’t eaten since early this morning.” he says. You ate fast so you can lay down.

However, your bedroom was feeling a bit hot due to the heat that blew from the vents.

“Do….” you shake your head and say, “Goodnight.”

Before you bury yourself fully under the covers, he steps away from the doorway.

“What were you going to say?”

“It’s a bit…Hot.” you say. Edward then steps forward.

“You need to cool down?” he asks carefully and you nod.

You didn’t know what you were expecting but he lay close to you. A much needed chill ran through your body as you lie on your stomach and his hand is flat on your back.

You woke up to a whisper. You couldn’t figure out what it said but your body shifts into consciousness. A hand runs down the back of your shoulder and you open your eyes.

“Happy birthday.”

“Thanks.” you say with a tired grin.

You sit up and stretch. You get his attention.

“See? Imagine if I didn’t get done yesterday.” you point out.

He grins and nods in agreement.

Before you could process anything else, Alice bursts through your bedroom and you smile as she wrapped her arms around you. The hug was firmer than usual as she was excited.

“Happy birthday!” she squeals.

“Thank you, thank you.”

She pulls your hands up and you’re up and out of bed.

“I have your birthday outfit. I’m going to go get it. Edward out.” she shoos off.

“Wait, Y/N. Just come with me I have to show you something.” he says.

“Let her get herself together first.” Alice says as her eyes roll.

You hold up a hand to Edward with a smile, “It will be quick. I’m just getting dressed.”

You stood in the mirror and you immediately got nervous. The outfit was good. Too good. It looked as if you could be in fashion week with the matching set. She tugged your hand to go downstairs but you resist.

She watched you as you sit down in a chair. You keep your legs together as you were wearing a skirt.

“You…Don’t like it?” she asks as you looked down. Your face didn’t show enjoyment.

You look up at her and you reassured her crushed face, “Alice stop it, I love it. It’s just…” you stop and she sits on your bed as she peered ahead at you.

“What is it?”

“I’m nervous.” you reveal.

“Don’t be. You’re about to be surrounded by people who can’t wait to celebrate your special day.” she says. You nod. A phone call makes your phone buzz beside you and you pick it up.

“Happy birthday, Y/N.” you hear and you smiled.

“Thanks, Emily.”

“Any plans? What are you doing?”

“I don’t know. I’m going with the flow of today.” you say.

“Well, I won’t hold you but, I miss you so much! I know you’re out there doing great things and I just wanted to say how proud I am of you but I know that you will get through anything.” she says. You knew what she was implying, you tell her you miss her too. You really did. You followed Alice down the stairs, the small clack was heard from the footwear Alice brought to go along perfect with what you had on.

Edward was waiting for you at the bottom of the stairs.

“Okay. I’m all yours.” you say. Without missing a beat, Edward says, “Look outside.”

You open the grand front door and outside sits a luxurious car with a present bow sitting prettily on top.

You turn and sees Edward’s smile directed towards you.

“Happy birthday.” he says again. You gasp and bend your knees slightly in disbelief, “Edward.” you say. He chuckles at your reaction.

“Edward, are you….Fucking kidding me?” you say with shock and he pulls out the keys, dangling them and you were in total disbelief as your hand closed around them.

You grab the keys and his hands, “Edward. This isn’t real.” you say. You don’t know if you’re trying to convince him or yourself. Alice had a camera at hand, smiling at the moment.

He peers down at you as he takes your hand and opens the driver door with his other hand.

You were overwhelmed. He watched from the passenger seat as you touched the steering wheel with such care. It was almost as if you were afraid to touch it.

He starts the car for you and the engine purred to life. It rode really smooth as you test drove it. You couldn’t stop smiling.

He soaked in the hug that you gave him as you kept telling him thank you. His arms were snug around your waist.

You received hugs and received “Happy birthday”s from the rest of the family.

Esme made you breakfast and held out your plate.

You slowly chewed and looked at Edward who smothered your hand that was on the table you say at.

“I can’t eat. I’m too excited.”

A crooked smile hit your way, “No, no. Eat.”

Your head was on his shoulder as you sat next to him on the piano bench. He played a happy birthday song with his fingers. It was just the two of you.

He held your hand as you both took slow steps in the museum you both were in. By the time you two were in an art gallery, his arm was snug around your shoulders.

He held you close as you entered the home and the Cullen family screamed, “Happy birthday.”

You let out a thank you as the room was filled with balloons and on the wall was balloons that spelled out, “Happy Birthday.”

Alice shoved her present in your hands.

“Sheesh, already?” you ask.

“Yes! Now open it!” she says. You rip it open and it was a black box. You crack it open and it was a Van Cleef bracelet.

“Oh my god.” you say in shock. You dangle it with your fingers as you take a look at it.

“Do you like it?” she asks.

“Yes.” you breathed out, “Alice, I can’t accept this-”

“It’s my gift to you! Happy birthday.” she says with a bright smile. You give her a hug and as Rose steps forward, Edward clasped the bracelet around your wrist.

“Here’s mine.” she says and you take it.

“I’m scared. We already started off strong.” you say and soft chuckles fill the room.

You crack open Rose’s gift and it was a necklace from the same brand.

“I got you the necklace to match with the bracelet.” she says. You thank her immensely and give her a hug. She carefully placed the necklace around your neck.

Emmett excitedly gives you your gift. You tear it open and you start laughing. A handheld game box was now in your hands.

“Thank you.” you say and give him a hug and he says, “I already added myself as a friend.”

“Of course you did.” you say with a smile.

Jasper hands you your gift and it was games to go with the game. You hug him.

Esme and Carlisle hand you a gift with smiles on their faces.

Tearing it open, you gasp and you almost started to tear up.

“You guys can’t be serious.” you say and they’re smiling.

“We feel like you should have something from one of the greats.” Carlisle says.

“One day, you will be up there with one of the greats.” Esme says and you shake your head.

“No.” you say and they disagree.

You have Edward hold the painting, you hug them both.

“Thank you so much.”

Rose, Alice, and Esme disappeared in the kitchen. Emmett didn’t waste any time to tell you to get on your new gadget.

Edward haves a seat in a chair. You feel him touch your hand. You look up to him and he tugs your hand to pull you to where he was sitting.

You slowly sit down and your shoulder leans against his chest as you and Emmett play together on your handheld game. His hand rests on your knee. You laughed at Emmett’s competitive nature.

Alice bounced out, her camera was in hand. You set the game to the side as Rose and Esme brought out homemade ice cream and cake.

“Smile!” Alice says with a smile. You give a polite smile and Edward wraps his arms tight around your waist and he slumps you to him. You both face the camera. The camera flashes and you rise up meet them as they walk to you with a lit up cake.

Happy birthday was being sung and Alice snapped pictures while singing in high octave that was above everyone else.

You close your eyes with a smile and then blew out the candles.

As you cut your own slice of cake, Edward taps you. You turn around a very large bouquet of flowers that bloomed strong.

Your hands go to your mouth as you gasp. He places them in your arms with a content smile. You set them down on a table and your arms wrap around him. He sways you side to side for a bit.

You both sit across from each other as he held the spoon out. He fed you the homemade ice cream.

“It was really great. Thank you.” you tell Rosalie and Esme and they both are pleased that you liked it.

Edward holds out a wrapped gift and you look at him. You both were sitting on the couch in his bedroom.

“You already got me something.” you say.

“I know but, you will like this.” he says with a hand on your back.

You pulled out a cd player that operated on both being bluetooth and wired. He watched as your smile grew.

“There’s already a cd in there.” he says.

You go to pop it open but he places a hand on your hand to halt you. You look at him.

“Just play it.” he says. You nod and you say, “Be right back.”

You grab your headphones and sit down back next to him. After connecting your headphones, you extend a headphone for him to stick on his own ear. He gladly sticks it in his ear and you click the play button.

You softly chuckle as the song was familiar. You were in shock.

You take the headphone out as the song ended. You look at him.

“How did you do this?” you ask.

He brings on a soft grin, “I pulled some strings.”

You pop open the cd player and lift up the cd, reading it out loud.

“Y/N and Edward piano duet.”

He sticks his hand in his pocket and pulls out a folded piece of paper, handing it to you.

“Now, what is this?” you ask him.

“Something I made.” he says softly.

“Before I read this, answer me something?” you ask him.

“Anything.”

“What’s your motive?” you ask as you look down.

“My motive is to always be around you. To get to know all of you.”

You breathe in as you unfold the paper and read the note in your mind.

Can feelings shared , be set to unfold?

Offering my heart for you to hold.

The sweetest music I have found

The ring of your laughter, such a joyous sound.

Wanting to learn your thoughts, dreams and fears

And to whisper secrets in your ears.

Breathing life into me with such ease

Drawing me to you compellingly.

Here I stand with a hopeful plea

To conquer this world, just you and me.

Your eyes travel to the bottom of the page, it showcased a drawing that he did by hand, it was with pen. Permanent.

Two figures were together, holding each other close, depicting such devotion.

You slowly look from the page, your heart rate was higher than normal. He was waiting for your reaction and you swallowed and refolded the paper.

“But, I’m a human.” you say sadly. You felt it couldn’t work.

“It doesn’t matter to me.”

When you don’t say anything a hand holds yours as he continues, “You showed me there’s more to my soulless life. You’re my angel.”

You were overwhelmed with emotion.

You tried to cloud your brain with activities to make yourself not think about what happened. You didn’t have a definite answer.

So you joined Alice as she danced. You would’ve thought it was her birthday as she had so much fun. Jasper couldn’t help but join his wife with a smile.

You blinked awake as you tossed and turned that night.

Edward was gone in the morning. You wondered if it was because of the day prior.

He came back right when it was time to leave, you had to drop your piece off to Larry.

“You can drive…If you want.” you say as Edward put your bags in the trunk. To be fair you didn’t trust yourself to be on the road.

He drove as you looked out of the window. You glanced at him as he was in his own head.

“Say something, please.” you say softly. The silence weighed heavy in the atmosphere.

He stared ahead and he seemed conflicted.

“I said everything I needed to say.” he says quietly.

You look down.

Larry chuckles richly as you unveiled the piece. Larry greedily looked as he walked around it. He claps his hands together before turning to you with a big smile.

He then gives you a present.

You look down in surprise.

“Open it up.” he says with a grin.

You rip it open and pull out a subtle but diamond studded watch. It dazzled brightly and you look at him.

“Happy belated birthday.” he says and you give him a big hug.

You come out, Edward hold the door open for you. You slide in the car and he catches the flashy watch.

“Larry gave that to you?” he asks. You nod.

“Did he not like it? You look a little down.” he says.

“He loved it actually.” you say softly chuckling. He hums a response. It’s silent again. When he slows to a stop in front of your apartment building, you turn to him.

“You can….Come up if you want.” you sheepishly say.

He thinks for a moment, before saying, “I didn’t eat today. I’m going to hunt.”

You nod.

“I’ll bring your stuff up.” he tells you and gets out.

Before he leaves out of the door, you hug him. Your head was in the middle of his chest. He looks down as he holds you back.

“Are you sure it doesn’t matter?” you choke out.

He takes a hold on your shoulders and looks you in the eye, “It doesn’t matter. I only want you.”

Your body feels hot at his words.

“Will…Will you come back?” you ask.

“If you want me to….Do you want me to?” he asks.

“Yes.” you say.

He leans forward slowly, you feel his cool lips touch your forehead. You close your eyes as he lingers on your forehead.

You hung your painting up in your living room, you step back and fix the crookedness of it.

The flowers sprouted out of the clear vase that Alice had set on the table.

You sat by the window in your bedroom as you sketched idly. You paused as you couldn’t help but flip back to the page of when you two were in Ithaca, the big field.

You stare at it. The buzz of your doorbell jumps you out of your thoughts. You rise up and walk slowly towards the door and unlock it.

You lie on your back, your head is turned in his direction. He watches you as he lies next to you.

His hand cradles your cheek and you both blink at each other. You slide your hand up to his, to hold onto your cheek. It was as if marble was touching you, but the hand cooled down your burning cheek.

Faces were close together as you both flutter your eyes to a close. Softly his lips brushed yours in a gentle way.

He pulled away but you chased for more. You both meet each other again, you hold him close so he doesn’t pull back fast.

His eyes squeezed shut as your fingers made him feel something that felt foreign to him. It was a rush. He knew that if he was human, his body would be filled with butterflies.

Next to you on your nightstand, a printed out picture of you and Edward from your birthday was faced up.

You both silently look at each other as you both lie close. You didn’t want to feel nothing else but the feeling that you were feeling right now. A wave of serenity. With that, the sappy smile was on his face was contagious, as you matched it.

It took some getting used to, but you found out that Edward was scared to open mouth kiss.

He didn’t know what would happen if you were to accidentally swallow his saliva, his venom. Alternatives had to be made. He didn’t mind the fact that you liked to kiss him on his face, not always on his lips.

Your contract ended, you sat in Larry’s office as he looked right at you. Edward sat next to you in a pair of sunglasses.

“So when’s the wedding?” Larry asks. The ring sat strong on your finger. It was Edward’s mother’s. You wore it with pride.

You look to Edward and he replies, “Next month.”

Larry looked at the two of you.

“So, what are you going to do Y/N? Are you extending it with me?”

You suck in a breath as you shake your head.

“We’re- I’m going to relocate.” you tell him.

“Okay, where? I even have a gallery in London. We made great business together.”

You nod, “Yes, I know. But, I need to branch out more. I don’t want to be stagnant.”

“You weren’t stagnant with me.” he pleads.

“It was nice doing business with you, but I got a better opportunity in France.” you say.

“Who’s representing you?” he presses.

“Nobody. I’m going independent.” you say. He accepts this but, he was sad to see you go.

You hold Edward’s hand as Alice shows you everyone she invited.

“Don’t you think we should elope instead?” you ask.

“No, silly! This is a celebration! Everyone has to come.” she says.

Edward turns to you, “If you want to elope we can.”

Alice’s face falls and you quickly say, “It’s alright. We can elope first and then have the wedding to the public.”

She brightens up and claps with excitement.

The climate was warm. Edward’s eyes came alive as you stood in front of him. The ceremony was small and in an intimate setting.

Carlisle married you both on your elopement. Edward carefully kissed you as he cupped your cheek and his family were the only ones who were in attendance. You didn’t mind since you weren't nervous around them.

The island that Esme gifted you both was where you both sat and looked at each other with anticipation.

He was the one who wanted to wait.

“The first time I want to make love, it will be with my wife.” he told you one night as you tried to feel him up. You understood.

Now, it was you who was nervous. He was the one who had to reassure you. You didn’t expect his cool skin to feel good against yours, but to be fair, the air in the bedroom had raised in temperature.

You suck in a breath as your legs were over his shoulders, he kept whispering how beautiful you were.

Your fingers twist in the sheets at the sensation. As he kept pumping, your body got used to it. Gasps of pleasure breathed out of your mouth. He was firm and it hit the right spots that has you trembling with ease. You then knew that he was perfect all the way around.

He didn’t last long but you didn’t care, he was a virgin after all.

He couldn’t get enough. The next morning, he held you close he rocked into you. The bed under you both gave out, you panicked only for a second but, he gave you a kiss as he told you, “Don’t worry about it.”

Kim whispered as Jared listened closely. He was sad.

Paul walked in. He changed, his presence was on edge, if people feared him then, they definitely feared him now.

“What’s going on?” he asks as they both went quiet as soon as he entered.

Kim worriedly looked at Jared.

“I’ll tell him.” he tells her. She nods and leaves out of the kitchen of the home her and Jared had gotten together.

“You might want to sit down for this.” Jared tells his friend.

“Who died?” he asks.

“Nobody… Kim ran into Y/N’s parents.” Jared says and Paul responds to your name. He still felt the feelings, your name still affected him. He felt one day you were going to change your mind.

“She okay?”

“I don’t know. She’s getting married and they asked her if she was going to the ceremony.”

Paul snorts, “Who’s the square?”

Jared watched as Paul contorts into a fit of rage, even that he’s never seen before. A mixture of hurt and betrayal was deep in his features.

When Sam went to look for him, the thoughts in his wolf mind was dark. He knew then that he went rogue. Paul had successfully detached himself from the pack.

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