#so yeah that In Between. same as ''yes i practiced piano for several years no i can't accompany you or even easily learn a song'' | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

moonlitcelestial · 25 days ago

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Chapter 18

Beyond the Lens - Logbook Videographer!Reader x OT8 Ateez

W/C 12,065

🎥 Series Masterlist 🎥

☽ Masterlist ☾

Inspiration Pictures

Pinterest Board Masterlist

Previous Chapter (Chapter 17)

Disclaimer: This story is purely a work of fiction. It is not meant to assume or mock anything about Ateez, Atiny, or anything relating to what I do not know about being a videographer. This story will follow several of the events that Ateez has done in the past year for Golden Hour Part 2, that being said I will not be able to include everything.

Contains she/her pronouns.

The logo in the center is mine. Please do not reuse or copy.

I strongly recommend looking at the inspiration pictures and the Pinterest boards linked above (which will be updating as the story goes on).

General Warnings: slow burn, cussing, conflict, angst, fluff, and obliviousness.

CHAPTER WARNINGS - Cuteness

Let me know what you think! <3 Moonie

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

You had played all of their songs that you knew and had moved on to showcase the other things you had under your belt. Some of the things you played were mashups flowing into several pieces without stopping, some movie soundtracks and some more classical pieces. Most of the time Hongjoong was sitting as close to you as he possibly could without interrupting your flow of music. That was until you decided to play something you knew would get them riled up. You started the notes of one of your favorite Stray Kids songs Back Door. As soon as Wooyoung recognized the tune he started yelling and marching over to you.

“Yah! Yah! None of that!” He grabbed your wrists from over your shoulders and you held back your giggle.

“Y/n-nie, No playing other oppa’s songs you should know better.” You turned to look at Hongjoong and he was surveying you like a predator would.

“They're not my oppas,” you snarked looking up at Wooyoung who was practically glued to your back. He was looking at you and you could see the twinkle of mischief behind his dark eyes.

“Yah, Y/n-nie” you heard Yunho from behind you and Wooyoung.

“Yes?”

“Don’t be a smartass.” You let out the laughter that was sitting in the back of your throat.

“I’m being truthful,” you said between giggles “they aren’t my oppas if I am older than every one of them.”

“Even Chan?” You heard Seonghwa ask from the corner of the couch he was perched against.

“Yes, even Chan.” You responded with a small huff. “Besides it's not like I am having an affair” you muttered under your breath. Only Hongjoong caught it and clicked his tongue at you. He knew exactly what you were doing now.

“Don’t be a brat Y/n-nie” You moved your eyes to look at him and his dark look was enough to shut you up about it. You nodded and Wooyoung released his hold on your wrists before making his way back to where he was on the couch.

“Jagi?” You turned yourself around on the bench to look at San who was sitting with his arm around Yeosang on the green couch.

“Yeah Sannie?”

“How did you learn all of these songs without having the sheet music?” Most of the eyes fell toward you with curiosity in their gazes. Hongjoong and Mingi both seemed particularly interested in the answer you were about to give.

“I have a penchant for being able to play things by ear, my Granny also taught me some techniques, I also may have inherited perfect pitch from her as well. Really it's a toss up between that having a little over fifteen years of experience playing, and being around a pianist for longer than that. I actually used to fall asleep best when I listened to piano music, or just music in general.

“Wait, so you can hear something and know exactly where it is on the piano?” Seonghwa asked while looking between you and Hongjoong. He must have been able to do the same.

“Pretty much,” you shrugged and looked over to Hongjoong who was smiling at you.

“So the intro from Ice on My teeth is something you could do without having music if I sang it for you?”

“Yeah, that's something I can do, ninety percent of the time I just listen to the song and learn as it plays anyway.” San got up from his comfortable position with Yeosang and was immediately replaced by Beans. He came closer to the piano and sat on the seat Hongjoong occupied a few minutes before. He started singing the intro to Ice on My Teeth, you briefly wondered if it had been stuck in his head and he wanted to get it out. As soon as he finished you looked at the keys of the piano.

“Can you do it again?” He hummed it again and you immediately went to the notes and played the small intro.

“Wahh,” You looked over your shoulder to see Mingi grinning at you. He seemed to be utterly entranced by you if the sparkle in his eye was anything to go by. Your eyes swept over the other boys and they were all wearing small smiles.

Turning back to the piano you caught Hongjoong’s stare. The brown in his eyes was deep and entrancing, he really tended to speak with his eyes. The way the lights twinkled in them was like stars; which is becoming one of your favorite sights. It made you happy that you could see this unguarded part of him, one that wasn't afraid to look at everyone in the room with absolute adoration; even you.

You turned back to the piano with a blush at the intense eye contact you had initiated. Smiling down at the keys you briefly wondered what spending all of your time like this would be like, not having to worry about the responsibilities of the rest of the world. You felt a hand on your chin, it gently brought you to look at Hongjoong. He was smiling at you, which made your heart absolutely melt; he was so beautiful like this. He leaned in and pressed a lingering kiss to your lips. You felt the pace of your heart pick up and the blush rush to your face; you couldn't stop the grin from spreading across your face as well. You tried to look down again but the hand on your chin quickly stopped you by tightening just a little. He kept eye contact with you until you remembered the polaroid folio you had stashed in your bag upstairs. You let out a noise of excitement before jumping up out of his grip and running out of the room and up the stairs leaving behind eight very confused men who followed you up. You took the stairs two at a time to get to your duffle in your room. You grabbed it and started rooting around, pulling out the black tennis ball you set it aside on the bookshelf. Digging farther you finally felt the edges of it. You made a squeal of triumph and did a small dance before getting up and making your way back down the stairs. All of the boys were standing in the great room watching you as you came down the stairs.

“Come on, let's go to the nook, I have something I want to share with you!” You grabbed the closest boy to you which happened to be Yeosang as you rushed past them. He let out a noise of surprise as you started dragging him toward the nook. Settling a large pillow behind you, you opened your arms and made grabby hands at them. Yeosang was watching you with an amused smile before he cuddled up to your left side followed shortly by Wooyoung on your right. San settled himself by Yeosang and Jongho was by Wooyoung. Mingi grabbed Seonghwa’s hand and led him to settle by Jongho. Both of them leaned on each other while Yunho and Hongjoong did the same on the other side. Each of them was making themselves comfortable leaning on each other; making one giant cuddle pile.

“So, y’know that I had my polaroid and was taking pictures during the MV,” They nodded their heads at you. “Do you guys want to see them?” (Polaroid reference Pics this is only some of them) They immediately burst into excited chatter, Wooyoung was speaking so quickly next to you that you couldn't quite understand him.

You opened the polaroid book to the first picture of your team, all of them had seen that one so you just moved past it. The next picture was the one you got of Seonghwa standing next to a lamp in his resistance outfit. Taking it out of the folio you handed it to Hongjoong and he gently took it before smiling widely. All of the boys craned to see the picture he was holding out.

“I didn't even see you get that! It looks so cool!” You smiled at Seonghwa who was looking at the picture closely. Hongjoong tried to hand it back to you but you shook your head at him, he reluctantly kept it whilst trying to hide a smile. Turning the page you went to the next picture which was the first group shot. You handed around the folio and watched with a smile as they almost fought over it. Mingi and Yunho were exchanging kicks at each other like four year olds while Seonghwa and Hongjoong tried to avoid their flailing limbs. Once the folio made it back to you you went to the next picture. This one was one you snickered at before taking it out and handing it to San. Wooyoung missed it entirely until it made its way back around again.

“Yah! What's this?! Why did you take this?.” He hid himself in his hands at the picture of him squatting in front of the mirror taking selfies. Everyone was laughing and the picture made it back to San who, like Hongjoong, tried to give it back to you which you wouldn't accept. He smiled at you and squeezed your leg in appreciation. The next picture was the one you caught at the end of the day of Hongjoong. You took this one out and handed it to Seonghwa who burst into loud laughter. All of the boys were interested to see what the eldest was clutching to his chest. Once he recovered he showed everyone and Hongjoong was trying to hide from embarrassment at the superman pose.

“How were you quick enough to even catch that? I only did it for a second!” He almost wailed.

“Photographers lightning quick reflexes Joongie. I’m good at what I do for a reason.” You smiled back.

Seonghwa looked at you before tilting his head in a silent question if it was for him. You nodded to him and looked back down at the folio. The next two were from the sitting group shot. You took one of them out and handed it around the group. They all started a yelling match to fight over it; you could see the smirk on Hongjoong’s face as he pulled the I'm the captain card. Mingi reluctantly handed it to him and you snickered at his pout. The next one you had in the folio was one that you caught of Jongho. You handed the little book around the group and all of them cooed at the maknae at how good looking he was holding the pocket watch. You joined in and by the time it got back to you his face was beet red from the compliments.

Turning the page you got to the ones that made you fawn over Mingi; and his hands. You took one of the two shots and handed it to Yunho, who looked at you in shock. You laughed at his expression and he almost kept it to himself without letting the rest of the boys see it. That earned him a small smack on the leg from Hongjoong. As soon as he handed it off the boys were freaking out about how hot Mingi looked staring at the camera putting the ring on. You were glad you kept one because you knew they would have fought you over it. Yunho made a show of tucking it away and you snickered before moving on. As you flipped the page you realized this one was after you gave Aurora the polaroid. You took in the picture, it was a close up from behind you while you filmed Mingi dropping the lighter. You were grinning and Wooyoung snatched the folio from you because you were taking too long.

“Wahh that's an amazing shot! Look at our treasure getting a video of our princess!” He handed the folio around to the rest of the boys who were smiling at you. You made a mental note to do something for Aurora as the folio got back to you. Turning the page you saw a cute picture of you and Jongho side hugging. You handed the book to Yeosang who was smiling at the picture. As it made the way around the circle the poor maknae was being teased again.

“Yah, you don't like affection but it's okay from her?” Wooyoung pouted as he received the folio. You held back the laughter bubbling up your throat at his expression.

“She doesn't push my buttons every second of every day like you do, and she asked before touching me.” He sniped back. Wooyoung looked up at you and you stuck your tongue out at him.

“I'm just his favorite.” Most of the other boys made noises of complaint at the comment. You looked to Jongho who was smiling at you, he gave you a small nod which made you grin even wider. Snatching back the folio from Wooyoung, who was holding it hostage, you turned to the next page. This one had to have been one of your favorites, it was a shot similar to the one with Mingi. You were in the foreground of the picture and Yunho was in the background with his head tilted back, the flames were outlining your silhouette and making him glow. You had half a mind to skip this one so they wouldn't try to take it but Yeosang had already seen it and was absolutely enamored by it. Which prompted San to reach over him and take it from you. Hongjoong and Yunho both leaned over to inspect the picture. Yunho was immediately a blushing mess as San and Joongie complimented him. The folio got passed around and all of the boys were amazed by it. Mingi tried to take it out of the folio but you grabbed it before he could.

As you turned to the next page you were met with the funniest picture of all of them so far. You threw your head back as you burst into laughter and clutched the book to your chest. All of the boys were wearing puzzled looks at your outburst. When you recovered you handed it around and all of them were pouting and protesting at the looks on their faces in the picture. Aurora had captured the moment you picked up the Tinkerbell moth, each of them were either staring at you with shock, disgust or awe. As soon as you had the book back you knew this one was getting stashed in your wallet. Flipping the page you were met with another comical picture. This time you snickered and handed the folio to Wooyoung who you knew would tease Seonghwa.

“Yah, Hwa hyung did noona embarrass you?” He jested holding out the picture. You were withholding one of your business cards from a very red faced Seonghwa. It must have been after you called him pretty. All of the rest of the boys burst into laughter as they inspected the picture. Seonghwa was absolutely mirroring the red face of the picture right now. When it made it back to you you flipped to the next one and your jaw dropped. Aurora must have either gotten in the water with you or was at the very edge of the fountain. You were in the bottom of the picture squatting getting the recording of the boys walking across in front of the flame. Jongho gently took the folio from you and exclaimed at the amazing picture. All of the other boys straightened and started squirming to see the picture. As soon as they saw it they all started bickering to see if they could get the picture. Hongjoong looked toward you and immediately knew you would want to keep this one. He snatched the folio from Yunho, who was being the most vocal about wanting it, and handed it back to you.

Flipping to the next page you were met with a very similar picture, only this time it was of you laying in the pool with the boys walking and Mr Song standing with his phone out recording you. You gasped and dropped the booklet out of shock before immediately picking it back up and investigating it closer. Moving your glasses out of the way you brought the photo as close to your face as it could get without distorting it; which ended up being only just beyond your nose. This time around the boys let you take in the picture before taking it from you.

“I can't believe she caught this, I am totally going to have to do something for her now.” Running a hand down your face, you readjusted your thick framed glasses over your face. You handed the book to Yeosang after fixing your glasses where you wanted them.

“What's that our treasure?” Hongjoong held his hand out to see the folio. San handed it to him and he inspected it closely like you did.

“Mr. Song was recording me in that picture. He actually posted a video of me stating how dedicated I was, it went viral within the photographer and videographer communities, and I am sure throughout some of the modeling and kpop companies with how much he has done.” All of the boys looked up to you and were wearing large smiles, you could feel Wooyoung wiggling around like he was trying to suppress the urge to bounce around. Just when you thought he had it under control he practically tackled you into Yeosang. He was hugging you so tightly you let out a breathless laugh.

“ ‘M so proud of you my rose.” He murmured to you, squeezing you even tighter. You wrapped your arms around him the best you could and Yeosang wrapped himself around the both of you giving you a gentle squeeze. Very few people told you that they were proud of you, it struck something deep in your chest hearing it; especially from someone who means so much to you.

“We are all proud of you Kkulbeol (Honeybee)” He left a kiss on the top of your head. Wooyoung squeezed you one more time which prompted a squeak out of you before letting you go and straightening up. As the picture made its way around the group you couldn't help but to smile at everyone who was as invested in this as you.

When Wooyoung handed it back to you, you flipped the page and immediately melted. You looked back up to all of your boyfriends before looking back down at the folio. You knew they had seen this one as they were the stars of it; Aurora must have handed the polaroid to them immediately after you went to change. All of them were in their MV outfits holding out finger hearts and beaming for the picture. At the bottom of the picture in the small white space was a heart with Ateez written next to it in what looked like Hongjoong’s handwriting. You looked back up to the smiling men and back down to the picture. This might be tattoo material down the line. You tried to say something but all of the thoughts flew out of your head as soon as you saw the picture, the butterflies had also made a rapid return to your stomach. Yeosang and Wooyoung were smiling at you while they leaned closer. Seonghwa leaned over Mingi and Jongho and gently took the folio from you. He held out the picture to show everyone and all of them immediately understood. Without any words having to be exchanged you moved onto the next picture.

This one was definitely one that would receive a lot of teasing. You took the spare out of the folio and handed it to Wooyoung. As soon as he caught sight of what it was he dramatically swooned while clutching it to his chest. Jongho had to practically wrench it from his hands and immediately went red at the picture of San sitting pretty and shirtless in his fur coat holding his barley tea. Shortly after he handed it off to Mingi.

“So hot,” Seonghwa murmured to himself while leaning to look at the picture with Mingi. You burst into laughter and looked at San who didn't realize it was him just yet. When it made it around to San he immediately flushed red and was waving his hands out in front of him trying to stop the teasing compliments. You flipped to the next page and showcased the next picture of him hanging from the chandelier. All of them immediately teased more, San was absolutely red faced, he was hiding from all of you by the end of the giggle fest.

The next one you flipped to was of Mingi standing in front of the large mural and looking like a god. You took the spare out and handed it around the group. As soon as Yunho got it he claimed it. You turned the page and were met with the pictures of Hongjoong squatting in front of the statues with that horrendous bow. You took one of the two out of the folio and handed it around.

“Yknow, that bow was absolutely atrocious.” You said as the picture made it to Hongjoong. He looked up at you with a smile and his eyebrows raised. Some of the other boys started snickering at the brash words.

“The only thing I could think of while you were wearing it was if I could get away with pulling you closer to me with it to kiss you.” Fuck why did you say that. The rest of the boys burst into bigger laughter while some of them agreed with you. Hongjoong’s face flushed while he looked down at the picture before handing it off to Seonghwa who was the last to see it. When it made it into Seonghwa’s hands he tucked it away with the other picture he had.

“You were thinking of him like that before you even were in a relationship with us,” you turned to look at Yeosang who was smirking at you. You felt the heat rush to your face and you immediately sunk into yourself away from him and into Wooyoung who was cackling. You tried to make yourself as small and hidden as you could behind Wooyoung.

“You had a crush on us,” Wooyoung teased, leaning back onto you. His entire body was shaking with his laughter.

“Shut the fuck up,” You got out from behind him so he couldn't lean on you any farther. Bringing your knees up closer to your chest you crossed your arms and let out a huff. San was the one to reach out to you and squish your cheeks as you pouted. You smacked his hand away and glared at him. The rest of the boys burst into laughter and started cooing at your embarrassment. You started moving to get up so you could leave. Just as you were scooting to the edge of the nook you were blocked by Yunho and Seonghwa; who were stretched out across the bottom of the large bed. An arm wrapped itself around your middle and yanked you back to your previous spot.

“You can dish it but you can't take it can you?” Yeosang was close to your shoulder as he asked. You chose not to dignify him with an answer, in choosing to do so all of the boys cooed at you again and got as close as they could to you. You started trying to push them away from you at one point you shoved Wooyoung’s face away from you while he was making kissy noises at you.

“She's so cute when she's flustered, we should do this more often.” Your head whipped around to look at Yunho. If looks could kill, he would be a dead man. His smile was cute but it held a little bit of menace behind it. The butterflies in your stomach were having an absolute field day, it almost was enough to make you nauseous.

“Alright I think she's had enough.” You glanced at Hongjoong who was watching you. He was holding out the folio that had gotten moved around in the commotion. You gently took it from him and opened it to your previous spot. The next picture you had forgotten about. You took the spare out of the folio with a snicker at the sight of a silly photo making you feel just a little better. Yunho immediately started laughing at his own expense when it got to him. The picture was of him while he was trying to be a mime behind the picture fame. Mingi snatched the picture from the last person who had it and kept it. You grinned at him and moved on. Yeosang’s pictures with the chandelier were next, you took the extra out and handed it to Jongho. His face immediately lit up and he tried to gatekeep it. With a light smack from Seonghwa he shared the picture. All of the boys were complimenting Yeosang who was hiding his face in your shoulder. You looked down at him and could see the red on the tips of his ears. Leaving a kiss on the back of his head you continued. The next ones were some of your favorites, just because of how Seonghwa was posed; and because he was iconic. Taking the more candid of the two out you handed it to San first. You knew he absolutely loved this kind of style. His eyes immediately went wide as he took in the picture of Seonghwa sitting on the car in his heels with his cute man bun.

As it made its way around the group most of the other boys were complaining about the pain of heels and how they don't know how Seonghwa does it. He responded with a smile and a shrug. You knew Mingi’s pictures were next, his form was perfectly silhouetted while he was standing on top of the car. All of the boys made noises protesting him standing on top of the car which was met by a laugh from you. They were expressing the thoughts you suppressed while he was actually doing it. He was smiling and giggling at the teasing remarks from the rest of the boys. After the teasing fest you flipped to the next page and smiled at the picture of Jongho standing next to the piano. Yeosang snatched the picture from you which shocked you as he had been fairly calm the entire time. Turning to look at him he was smiling at the picture and tried to keep the other boys from taking it from him. Wooyoung had reached over you and gave him a smack, holding his hand out expectantly.

“Be nice,” if Yeosang wasn't going to stand up for himself you would have to do it for him, he was too sweet for his own good. The rest of the boys started ooing at Wooyoung like children after you lightly scolded him. He looked at you like a kicked puppy and you pinched his cheek. He tried to smack your hand away but you were quicker to pull away which resulted in a smack to himself. Yeosang let out a snort and you snickered as well. The picture finally made its rounds and most of the boys were babying Jongho. The maknae was hiding himself on Mingi’s shoulder as the picture made it back to Yeosang. Flipping the page you were surprised to find this picture. Aurora had a penchant for knowing when to pull at your heartstrings. The picture was of you playing the piano in front of the boys who were all leaning against it. You could see some of the people in the background who had frozen in time while you played. Tearing your eyes away from the picture you handed it around.

The boys were thoroughly inspecting the picture of you. Turning to take each of them in you let a small smile worm its way onto your face. Yeosang was just leaning on you content, as was Wooyoung. San was laying on Yeosang’s hip as he laid down, Hongjoong was leaning on his arm on San. Yunho was laying with his head on Hongjoong’s stretched out legs; Seonghwa was doing the same with Mingi. Jongho was sitting close to Wooyoung but mostly leaning on Mingi. All of them were just smiling and radiating happiness.

When the polaroid booklet made it back to you you turned the page to see Yunho’s beginning shots with the sucker. This one you knew they would fight over so you handed it to Yunho first. His responding smile was contagious and sent shivers down your spine. As it made the rounds the boys were loudly debating who would get the photo, but what they didn't notice was Jongho tucking it away. He held eye contact with you and held up his finger to his lips, you nodded and started to move on. When you flipped to the next picture you smiled adoringly at the one shot you got of Yeosang covering his blushing face with the tennis racket. You showed it to him first and he suppressed a smile and hid himself in your shoulder.

“The director complimented him and this is what happened.” you handed it to San after he hid from you. As soon as he had it in his hands he started smacking Yeosang. His cuteness aggression was in full force while looking at one of the most bashful members caught in the picture. When the other boys saw it they started cooing at an embarrassed Yeosang, who was digging his head farther into your shoulder like you could absorb him.

“That is all of the ones I have, plus the ones you guys got when I was taking them.”

“Y/n-nie?” you turned to look at Yunho, “Thank you for sharing these with us, we really love that you did this for us.”

“Yuyu, I loved being able to do this for all of you. It brings me immense happiness to be able to bring anyone joy. It's part of why I chose this job. For me it’s not about the pictures or videos I capture. It is the memories that are beyond the lens.” Looking over all of their faces they were watching you with an intense sense of understanding. You could see a lot of what they do in what you do. Creating to inspire.

“Do you ever look at a picture and think back to what was happening then and what led up to it?” They nodded at you and some of them looked at the polaroids they were holding onto. “That's what I strive to invoke, the emotions connected to the pictures and videos. That's what I did today with these pictures. I evoked all of your happy memories leading up to the pictures and helped you create ones after showing you them.”

“You are something else Y/n you know that?” Smiling down at yourself you made your hands busy with the folio to keep from picking at your nails. Having this much attention on you could be pretty nerve wracking. Wooyoung squeezed your arm a couple of times for comfort. All of them were watching you with smiles, as soon as you met their eyes they were satisfied you were okay and pulled out their phones. You pulled yours out from the pocket of your dress and checked it. There were a few emails from some people that you had been conferring with about traveling to help with their model shoots or commercials. Those emails were something you could deal with later when you got back into the office. You also had to plan for the trip you were going to be taking the day after Yeosang’s birthday.

“Oh, I forgot to mention, the day after Sangie’s birthday I have to go on a business trip for about a week and a half to France for Mens Fashion Week.” You didn't even look up from your phone while you confirmed the booking of your hotel.

“You're going to Men's Fashion Week?” You looked up at Hongjoong who all but threw his phone at your words.

“Yeah,” you tilted your head at him. “A few of the brands I have worked with are requesting my presence for some of their photoshoots and shows. Specifically for the Comme des Garcons Homme Plus Show, I've been working with them for a couple of years now.” His eyes got wider if that was even possible. Seonghwa was laughing in earnest now at your confused look.

“I'm going to that show! I was invited as a VIP!” He was almost shouting with excitement.

“Really now?” You let a grin worm its way onto your face.

“Shutterbug!” his large smile was contagious and had made it across most of the other boys’ faces; yours just got wider.

“Songbird!” You raised your eyebrows at him, he was bouncing around and Yunho was laughing at how much he was making him move. You got up and stood to walk off the mattress of the nook making sure to carefully avoid the limbs of the other boys. As soon as you made it off the nook you stood there looking at him with a tilt of your head. He took the hint and clamored over Yunho to throw himself at you with excitement. You wrapped your arms around him and laughed as you steadied yourself.

“I get to see you in your element! I'm so excited!” He separated himself from you and settled his hands on top of your shoulders, slightly shaking you.

“I can tell Songbird, but you have already seen me in my element plenty, I literally basically work for you at this point.” He made a noise of disgust before rolling his eyes.

“You don't work for us you work with us there is a huge difference. I meant in your element like you not focusing on us.”

“Ohh, I see. Either way I'm excited too! I can't wait to see your outfit for the show, I'm sure it will be amazing.” He was absolutely beaming at you at the mention of the outfits he would be wearing.

“It's going to be interesting for sure, of course if you are wearing what you normally wear I am sure we will be almost matching.” That was an odd thing to mention.

“What is it that I normally wear, Joongie?” You already knew the answer, you just wanted to mess with him a bit. His eyes widened and his face turned a cute shade of pink at your teasing question.

He took his hands off your shoulders and started waving them in front of him to make sure you understood that he didn't mean to offend you in any way. “I mean like if you wear your black formal clothes like when we first met ‘cause it is more of a professional setting you know? Or just black in general like you normally do.” You let out a small snicker at his rambling and heard a few snorts of laughter behind you.

You cupped his cheeks in an effort to calm him slightly, “Joongie, I’m just messing with you. Generally photographers wear all black when they are out for shoots anyway.” He let out a sigh and closed his eyes leaning into your touch. You smiled at him and left a kiss on his forehead before stepping away and moving back to the large cuddle pile on the nook. He followed shortly after you and let Yunho cuddle up to him again.

All of you were content just laying out on the large expanse of the nook. Some of the boys were just scrolling on their phones and others were petting the giants who had made their way around. Mocha was laying on your legs while Yeosang and Wooyoung were leaning on your shoulders watching TikTok videos with you. Before too long you ran across Aurora’s repost of the video of you that Mr. Song took. She captioned the video ‘The dedication is unreal VisionsbyOnyx, kqentertainment, Ateez_Official_’ with a large amount of hashtags. She had only reposted the video a few minutes ago. You liked and reposted the video before two boys leaning on you could quite register what it was.

“Yah! Is that you?!” Wooyoung inquired loudly next to you, which startled the rest of the men surrounding you.

“Yeah that’s me, and there’s you and the rest of the boys,” Yeosang gently grabbed your hand and brought the phone closer to his face to watch the video again. His face broke into a smile and he looked up at you adoringly.

“Let me see! Let me see!” San was reaching toward you making grabby hands at your phone. You chuckled and gave it to him.

“Wahh Jagi! This is so amazing!” He beamed as he showed the video to Yunho and Hongjoong. Both of them lit up as they watched the video.

“Don’t gate keep it! We want to see too,” Mingi was motioning wildly with his hands at Hongjoong who had your phone. He rolled his eyes and handed it over.

“Our Treasure! That’s so cool! I still can't believe that you laid in a pool of water to get that shot!” Seonghwa was smiling as he kept watching the video.

“It’s part of my job to get the shots no matter what. Remind me one of these days and I will show you the pictures I got while I was strapped into the back of a moving car for some of my motorcycle and car shoots.” (Here is a reference of the kind of photography I am thinking Bellakshoots)

“Wait what? You did what?” Your gaze fell to Hongjoong’s shocked one. All of the boys were looking at you like you were absolutely nuts.

“I've done many miscellaneous and slightly dangerous shoots especially during my college days when no one had the balls to do it.”

“You have to show us those soon!” Yunho was smiling at you as the words flew out of his mouth.

“I will, It is a lot though so we might have to carve out a day to do it.”

“Deal!” He and Wooyoung responded in unison. They both looked at each other and started giggling. You shook your head at them and motioned for your phone back. Jongho gently gave it to you and you resumed doom scrolling. Most of the other boys had resumed what they were doing and all of them had some kind of contact with you, either a hand on you or laying on your legs; whatever they could get. The warmth of everyone and the tiredness from all of the excitement of the day was finally starting to wear on you. Your eyelids were getting droopy and you tried so hard to stay awake but you couldn’t.

★☆☽ O ☾☆★

“They’re asleep.” When the words were whispered by San everyone turned to look at where you, Wooyoung, and Yeosang were huddled together. Your head was leaning back against the window and the boys were slumped against your shoulders. Your phone was softly playing a photography video over and over again. Yunho got up and the rest followed quietly and gently to make sure not to disturb you guys. As soon as all of the boys extracted themselves San and Jongho shifted you three to be actually laying down instead of leaning at an uncomfortable angle. Seonghwa grabbed one of the blankets that was in the large basket and covered all of you, even Mocha, who seemed content enough to start purring as soon as it was over her.

“I know we haven’t known her for very long but it feels like I have known her for a lifetime. I am really happy we have the opportunity to take care of her and love her.” Yunho turned to look at Mingi who was watching the entire thing with a small smile. His eyes spoke volumes as they looked back at him. He took a step toward Yunho and immediately wrapped him in a hug. Relaxing into it Yunho gave him a pat on the back and a kiss to the side of his head. Mingi must have needed to put that energy somewhere else so he wouldn’t squish them. As soon as he pulled away he grabbed Yunho’s hand and led him out of the room to the gaming room. Yunho watched as Mingi grabbed a controller and plopped onto the large beanbag which almost swallowed him. Snickering, Yunho grabbed the other controller and settled next to him.

As they browsed the options of games San and Jongho made their way in holding hands. Jongho settled onto the couch and San immediately curled up to him. watching the Maknae still get flustered after all this time was one of Yunho’s favorite things. His face was red as he tucked an arm around San who pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. Jongho lightly slapped him on the shoulder and turned to look at the two on the beanbag for help.

“You chose one of the clingy ones to hang out with, don’t look at me like that.” Yunho was smiling at the two of them, even after getting flipped off by Jongho. Mingi let out a snicker and finally chose a game. Most of the afternoon had continued like this. The boys had made themselves at home within your home.

A short while later there was a slight shuffle across the floor of the great room. All of the boys that converged into the gaming room leaned to look out the door to see Wooyoung rubbing his eyes with a sleepy smile. As soon as he spotted the rest of his boyfriends he made his way over and crawled into the space between San and Jongho. The former laughed as Wooyoung tucked himself as close as possible to the two of them.

“What are we going to do for dinner?” Everyone turned to look at Seonghwa. Some of them snickered at his question.

“We could go and get things to prepare noona food, or she has told us many times that we could poke around and make something if we wanted.” Wooyoung sleepily responded before he yawned.

“I like that idea, a repayment of when she made us something this morning. I think there was a shop not too far down the road, one that is maybe a few minutes drive.”

“I'll go get changed and head out then," San detangled himself from Wooyoung. Wooyoung whined up at him until San gave him a small peck in the lips. As soon as he did Wooyoung got up to go with San, the rest of the boys watched as they left.

★☆☽ O ☾☆★

You woke up to the smell of food and an arm wrapped around you. Peeking up to see who it was, you found Yeosang smiling down at you. He had placed his phone down to his side to pay complete attention to you.

“Hi, did you sleep okay?” He tucked some of your hair behind your ear. You responded with a sleepy smile and tucked yourself closer to him burrowing into his chest.

“Yeah I did, I haven't fallen asleep in the nook in a long time. Also you didn't have to stay with me, you could have gone to be with the other boys.” His arms wrapped tighter around you and he placed a hesitant kiss to your hairline.

“You were comfy against me, I couldn't move and disturb you especially knowing your shitty sleeping habits. You are just as bad as Joongie hyung” You let out a snort and reached out to lightly smack his side. He let out a chuckle and tucked you closer to him, if that was even possible. You listened to the general chatter coming from the kitchen, most of the boys must have been in there.

“Dinner is almost done, is she awake?” Yunho questioned from the general vicinity of the arch between the kitchen and nook. You picked your head up from Yeosang’s chest and looked over to him. As soon as he realized you were already awake a smile lit up his face. He stepped closer and sat at the edge of the nook placing a hand on your leg.

“Youngie and Minki made dinner for you to repay you for breakfast. Dont worry Hwa hyung made sure to not let them completely destroy your kitchen.” You let out a huff of laughter at the thought of Seonghwa following the two around the kitchen cleaning up after them. Sitting up and moving away from Yeosang you moved closer to Yunho who was still smiling at you. Yeosang followed you but got up and walked out toward the kitchen. You stretched your arms above your head and let out a small squeak at the way your bones popped. Yunho got up and offered you a hand to help you. As soon as you took it he gently tugged you up and into his arms. You relaxed into the hug wrapping your arms around him and you felt him rest his head on yours. His heartbeat was steady under your cheek.

He pulled away from you and gently grabbed your face, running his thumb over your cheekbones. His hands took up most of your cheeks and his fingertips rested on your neck. He leaned into you and gently put his lips against yours. You closed your eyes and leaned up into the kiss, lightly grabbing his shirt to keep yourself steady. Your heart stuttered in its rhythm, the gentleness with which he held you was earth shattering. He held you like you were his whole world while he poured everything into the kiss. You let your hands run up and down his back which prompted a small shutter from him. Smiling into the kiss you stepped closer to him successfully slotting yourself as close as you could without breaking the kiss. Once you broke apart you opened your eyes and watched him as he put his forehead against yours smiling softly with his eyes closed. When he opened them his dark eyes sparkled with love. You couldn't stop the small smile that made its way onto your face.

“You are so beautiful when you smile Haebalagi,” you tilted your head at him in a silent question.

“It means sunflower in English. Sunflowers always face the sun and I want to be your sun, the one that always makes you smile; with the exception of the other boys and your team.” Your smile only got bigger as you put your face in his chest. His responding laugh warmed your heart as he wrapped his arms over your shoulders again; one of his hands coming to rest on the back of your head. You felt him start to sway with you. God damn. Just about twenty four hours ago you would have never thought this is where you would be.

“Yuyu, everything okay in here?” As soon as you heard Mingi’s soft voice you peeked your head around Yunho to look at him. He smiled widely at you and walked into the nook. You watched as he walked past you and settled himself behind you wrapping his arms around you and Yunho. Your mind immediately thought back to the first time this happened. You really should have seen this sooner, the way they held you hasn't changed but the feelings between the three of you had. Sighing happily, you settled back into their embrace, Yunho was sharing a small look of absolute pride with Mingi above your head. You just stood there for what only felt like seconds before Wooyoung had started yelling across the house summoning everyone.

The three of you perked up as soon as you heard someone snap a picture of your group. Peeking around Yunho’s shoulders for the second time in a few minutes you saw Hongjoong with a large smile on his face. The smile you wore never quite left your face; it only got bigger as the time went on. Mingi was the first to step away with a kiss to the back of your head, Yunho did the same but with a peck to your lips. You stood there for a minute in shock, it still felt like a fever dream. One of your hands made its way up to your face, your fingertips lingered against your lips. Hongjoong approached you and held out his hand for you to grab so you could go to the other room. You gladly took it and noticed how perfectly his hand moulded against yours. He gently tugged you out and toward the back porch where the rest of the boys were.

Something about how quickly and easily they settled into your house made your chest tighten with adoration. All of them were chatting and waiting for you and Hongjoong to join them; just like this morning. The only difference was the fairy lights you had strung across the ceiling were twinkling giving the porch a warm glow in the twilight. As soon as the rest of the boys saw you their smiles made the room even brighter. There was a seat open next to Jongho which you took with a small smile. Hongjoong took the seat across the way from you between Yunho and Seonghwa. There was already a plate of food ready for you and Jongho scooted it closer to you. When you took the first bite the flavors burst across your tongue, this was easily the best food someone made for you; other than your mother. You looked at Wooyoung and Mingi and smiled wide.

“Thank you for making this, it is absolutely delicious.” Wooyoung being Wooyoung smirked and threw his hands out in a dismissive motion. Mingi beamed at you with a small blush covering his face.

“We got all of the things from the small shop down the road, and we replaced some of the things you used on us this morning.” You looked over to San who was wearing a small smile. You had completely forgotten to show them the greenhouse, they could have used some of the things you had instead of spending their own money on you.

“You really didn't have to do that, I was more than happy to make it and use the things I had on you guys; you are my boyfriends after all.” A weight settled on your leg toward your knee, looking down you saw Jongho’s hand resting there. You looked back up at him and he was looking at you already, as soon as your eyes met his he looked away. You gently grabbed his hand letting yours rest on top of it. His hand squeezed your fingers that had settled themselves on his palm.

“Aish, we wanted to, and it was the perfect excuse to get to know your kitchen better. If I have my way we'll be cooking together more often.” You looked at Wooyoung who was smiling wholeheartedly at you.

“You just want to have more space than the dorms to cook, don't be so coy.” You looked at Yeosang and burst into laughter; he really was a sniper with his comments. He huffed at the two of you and returned to eating. The dinner continued with small chatter from the boys between bites. Jongho’s hand was a steady presence throughout the dinner, it made you happy that he was getting more comfortable with you.

A little while later while you were settled on the couch in the game room watching the boys play one of the co-op games you had. You were leaned back against San’s chest with his arm wrapped around your shoulder. Yeosang was on his other side leaning his head on his back quietly watching the others play. Seonghwa was lying across the couch with his head in your lap and his legs on Hongjoong who had a hold of your hand over Seonghwa’s stomach. You were smiling down at Seonghwa’s relaxed face as you combed your fingers through his long hair. A shout startled you and you turned to see what happened. Mingi was caught in a death loop as the others kept trying to get him to move. A snicker left you before you could suppress it. All of their heads whipped up to look at you, each one of them was squinting at you like you had cursed at them.

“Go on, keep embarrassing yourself, it's entertaining.” Yunho hid his smile at your response. Mingi rolled his eyes at you and turned back to the screen. Wooyoung and Jongho both smiled at you and turned back to the screen. You watched as they continued the game after Mingi got himself out of the loop.

“When do you guys need to head back?” You asked, turning back to looking at Seonghwa and Hongjoong. Seonghwa opened his eyes and moved his head to look at Hongjoong.

“We can spend one more night here, tomorrow we have a mid morning schedule we need to get to.” He squeezed your hand with a small smile.

“That works perfectly that way you don't have to get out and navigate while it is dark.” Your mind wandered for a moment before remembering you needed to show them the greenhouse. “Oh speaking of it being dark, I have something that I would like to show all of you whenever they get done with this round. Seonghwa nodded against your thigh and closed his eyes again, basking in the attention you were giving him; just like Toothless does. A few minutes later the boys had completed their round and paused the game. As soon as they did, the four of them got up, Yeosang was the first to separate himself from the pile on the couch. Seonghwa sat up and stretched, Hongjoong reached over to smooth out his hair which was a little ruffled from you running your fingers through it. You stretched out your legs and your knee let out a large pop, you winced and straightened it back out. San was looking at you with a small tilt of his head.

“It's just my shitty knees, nothing to worry about.” He nodded at you and got up. Jongho had stepped in front of you to help you up. Smiling up at him you took it and offered your other to one of the boys still seated on the couch. Seonghwa ended up taking it and smiled as you tugged him up. As soon as he was up he let go of your hand and helped Hongjoong up. Once everyone was ready you started leading them out of the room toward the front door where their shoes were.

“We have a little bit of a walk to get to where I am taking you so you might want your shoes instead of being barefoot like I generally am.” All of them muttered as they went to find where they left their shoes. When all of them were ready you slipped on your well loved black studded birkenstocks. You would have to get them some slip ons to have around here. You led the boys to the back door and outside, a hand found yours just as you passed the threshold; you turned to look back at Jongho. You smiled at him and made your way out into the backyard. Following the curve of the pool you went to the small walkway lined with firefly lights toward the back behind the hottub. Making your way out over the small path you took them down toward the greenhouse.

The boys followed you diligently through the winding cobbled path. The lanterns were casting a warm glow through the trees as you led them farther away from the house. As soon as you got close enough to see the large weeping willow you paused to make sure all of the boys were with you. Jongho was the first to catch sight of it, his eyes sparkled as he looked at the lights. He turned to look at you and back at the tree. When the other boys got into range and almost ran into the pair of you you heard several shocked gasps. Looking over their faces you snickered at the shock and awe. You led the boys farther down the path and past the koi pond. Jongho had let go of your hand to explore the rest of the area which was lit up with various fairy lights and lanterns. Some of them had stopped to look at the water and let out shrieks as they noticed the fish.

Shaking your head at them you moved toward the greenhouse which they had yet to see. They couldn't quite see the greenhouse because it wasn't lit up and the other lights were only bright enough to light up the small area around them. The dark colored greenhouse only stood out to you because you knew what to look for and had been down here many times at this time of the night. You walked into the greenhouse and turned on the lights taking in the smell of fresh soil and plants. Most of the boys shouted in awe when you turned the lights on within the greenhouse. Every one of them moved toward where you were standing in the doorway. All of their eyes were shining as they took in the expanse of plants and things scattered about.

“This is where I get a lot of the produce that's up in the house. Most of the strawberries I had were from here, I only bought some frozen ones to go into the daiquiris. This wing is for fruits and herbs I can grow in the greenhouse.” you motioned to the left wing.

“This wing is for the vegetables” you motioned to the right wing looking over the several things that were ready to be picked. Hongjoong let out a noise of disgust before retreating out of that wing and toward the fruits.

“The center is just for some of the plants I dont keep in my office. I also have several fruit trees that I have amassed over the years outside.” Wooyoung was bouncing around like a kid in a candy shop. He immediately spotted the watermelons and went over to inspect them. The rest of the boys had spread out amongst the greenhouse looking over everything and touching most of the leaves.

Your mind started to wander at the possibility of having a large picnic out here. The large picnic blanket would be set out under the willow tree. You could see Wooyoung and Yeosang out here picking some of the fresh vegetables and fruits. Seonghwa and Jongho would be picking apples and some of the other things. While the other boys sat and watched the koi. You were startled out of your thoughts when someone grabbed your hand. As you focused back into reality you saw San standing in front of you with a smile. Finally letting yourself listen to your intrusive thoughts you poked his cheek where his dimples were showing. Just as you did so he burst into small giggles which were contagious. The both of you were giggling at each other, further listening to your thoughts you leaned in and pressed a hesitant small kiss to his cheek right where his dimple was. You watched as his smile turned bashful and his face turned a cute shade of red.

“Awwww look at how flustered he is, noona you made him turn red.” Snickering at Wooyoung’s comment, you moved around San and walked over to the fruits hoping he wouldn't see your blush too. After a couple more minutes of letting the boys explore you started to head back to the house. As you meandered down the pathway you were smiling at the humming and chattering of the boys behind you. A few of them had run past you chasing each other which you shook your head at. You made your way up to the house to see the three goofballs lined up on the cat tree staring into your soul. As soon as you walked into the house all of them scattered their nails scraping across the floor in their haste to get away.

“We should probably get to bed soon,” you said plopping onto the couch next to Mingi and tucking your legs under you. The rest of the boys had made themselves comfortable on the other couches. You watched as Beans and Mocha were running across the pedestals on the wall. The two of them were running all over the place and Toothless was just behind them. When the children started getting hyper it meant they were working off their energy to go to bed. The boys were watching with worried looks as the giants were running across the wall and ceiling. Toothless had jumped from one of the pedestals on the ceiling to the large treehouse with a loud thud which made the boys jump who weren't paying attention to him. You snickered as he leapt off the treehouse and took off up the stairs almost careening into Yunho who had just come out of the bathroom. He let out a yelp and jumped over Toothless so he wouldn't collide with him. Yunho looked at you with a raised eyebrow, which made you lose it. You had doubled over on the couch at the look of confusion and shock. As he was walking to make his way over to you Mocha and Beans both almost ran him over too.

“Aish you crazy cats,” he muttered as he approached the couch.

“When they get like this it's best to just sit still and keep your feet up off the floor.” As you said that the other boys moved to tuck their legs up under them or to rest on the others. They heeded your warning in perfect time because Mocha came in chasing Beans around the small table you had in the middle of the couches not a second later. Yunho leapt over the back of the couch and settled himself next to Mingi as the girls took off again.

“If you give them a few minutes they will calm down, this is their night time routine before we settle down for bed.” San let out a laugh at the fact which made you smile at him. Shortly after you heard the scraping of claws against the wood floor and you watched as Toothless ran away from Beans. You leaned forward on the couch knowing exactly what he was going to do. He leapt up onto the back of the couch and ran across it which scared both Yunho and Mingi. As soon as he made it toward the edge of the couch he leapt off it and ran around the cat tree with Beans. Several of the boys let out laughs at the absolute absurdity of the giant's chaos. It had already been a few minutes of this, not to mention however long they were doing this before you got back to the house.

“Alright, since they show no signs of stopping I am going to go get ready for bed, maybe if I settle down they will too.” You stood up and stretched, most of the boys had muttered some form of goodnight before you made your way up the stairs. After you made it to the middle of the landing, Toothless ran into the back of your legs at full speed and knocked you over. You caught yourself on your good knee before resting your other one on the floor with your hands coming down to balance you. You turned yourself around to lay on your back as the giggles overtook you. Fucking 23 pound monster. The loud thud of you catching yourself before hitting the floor startled all of the boys downstairs which prompted them to run up the stairs to see you laying on your back on the floor giggling. You looked up at each of the concerned men surrounding you.

“Are you okay?” Yeosang crouched down next to your prone position on the floor. You nodded and fell into another fit of giggles.

“It happens all the time, he will run into me and then disappear. Sometimes I swear he does it just to fuck with me.” Just as you said that he wandered into the room like nothing happened. San immediately moved to him and scooped him up. You watched as he gently scolded the giant cat in his arms. Wooyoung moved over to pinch his back feet which made him squirm. San ‘tortured’ him with a few kisses on his head and put him back down. As soon as he was back down on the floor he walked up to you and headbutted you like he normally did when this happened and walked away. San offered you a hand to help you up and you took it. You dusted yourself off and smiled at all of the men. Seonghwa had his hand on his chest like he was still trying to recover from hearing you hit the floor. Mingi, Yunho and Jongho were watching you with a quiet intensity. You caught Hongjoong looking you over to make sure you really weren't hurt. San and Wooyoung were just smiling at you which you returned. Yeosang stood back up to his full height and settled his hand on your lower back.

“Come on Y/n-nie lets get you to bed so the crazies will calm down too.” Yeosang started escorting you to your room. Most of the boys scattered and made their way to the rooms they claimed attempting to avoid the giants as they ran around. When you stepped into your room and turned on the light you saw Toothless laying on the large tree in your window. You stepped up to him and started petting him.

“Did you really have to go and embarrass me in front of my boyfriends like that you little shitlin.” (this is an actual thing I call my cats, it is a mixture between shithead and gremlin) He chirped at you in answer and Yeosang snorted. You let out a small chuckle at him and walked away toward your walk in closet. Yeosang had made himself comfortable on the chair at the end of your bed. You closed the door and ruffled around for another sleep set, the one you had worn this morning would have been fine in any other instance but after cooking in it you were sure it smelled like food. You grabbed your low battery sleep set and threw it on. Once you were finished you stepped out into the main portion of the room to see Yeosang had changed into some shorts and a tank top. He looked up at you from his phone and smiled.

You grabbed the remote off your shelf on the bedframe and turned to the star lights that were embedded into your ceiling. After you made sure they were the perfect brightness and set the sleep timer you walked over to turn off the big light. Yeosang let out a small gasp as you turned off the lights; you smiled at his wonder. You made your way back over to your bed and crawled into it. As soon as you were comfortable you opened your arms in an invitation to Yeosang. He set his phone off to the side and moved over to you and crawled into the bed with you. You were situated on your back and he hovered over you giving you a small peck on the lips before he settled on top of you with his head directly over your heart. This was the first time you got to hold him and not the other way around when you cuddled. He absolutely melted into you as you started running your hands up and down his back giving him scratches here and there. Eventually your hand made it into his hair and he let out a small noise of contentment. You listened as he hummed a small tune, his deep voice was reverberating against your chest and it shot an arrow straight through your heart. His voice was so beautiful and unique, you could just sit here and listen to it for the rest of your life.

A couple of minutes later San walked into the room, he glanced up at the ceiling. “Wahh, that's so cool!” He stopped just short of the end of the bed and took in the rest of the lights. You were just smiling at him, he turned to look at you and smiled back. He crawled into the bed on your other side but before he could lay down completely, his eyes caught on something above your head.

“Yah, is that Hetmongi and Ddeongbyeoli?” You picked up your head and turned to look up toward the headboard by your pillows where you knew they were. Yeosang was looking up and caught sight of them. The grin that split across his face was smug as he looked back at you.

“Yeah, the rest of them are sitting on the shelf just above my head. I'm honestly surprised you didn't clock the large dragon plushie first.” San’s eyes moved around the bed until he caught sight of the large black dragon plush that was close to Yeosang’s side. His eyes continued up and saw the rest of the Aniteez sitting pretty on the bedframe’s shelf you put your glasses on. He was very pleased with himself as he picked up Ddeongbyeoli and replaced him with Sandeoki on the bed. You rolled your eyes at him and opened your arm to him so he would settle against you. He settled on his side next to you tucking himself under it. He and Yeosang were both smiling at each other and exchanged a sweet kiss before cuddling farther into you.

“Goodnight my sweethearts,” you murmured, taking off your glasses and setting them on the shelf.

“Goodnight our treasure, we had so much fun with you today.”

“I had fun with all of you too, we definitely need to make this a habit whenever we can.” Yeosang nodded his head against you, you could tell he was losing the battle with sleep. His breathing started evening out and you left a kiss on the crown of his hair before turning to look at San. He was looking at you with his eyes half open and a sleepy smile. You returned it and cradled his head closer to you so you could leave a kiss on his forehead. He melted into you and finally closed his eyes. You stared up at the ceiling watching the lights twinkle like stars.

How the hell did you get this lucky? These men had shown you more love in the past day than any other prospective relationship had or any relationship for that matter. You thought back to Hongjoong’s words yesterday.

You feel like the missing piece we never knew we needed. We are pursuing you. You are the person that we want to have with us from now on. You. Not anyone else. You. We want you through the light and the dark. We want you through everything.

Maybe it was finally time to put your trust into someone else, to let them care for you in the way you had for yourself all this time. Maybe you could finally let someone else in. You had taken a large step into the unknown with these men and right now it felt like one of the best decisions you have made in your life. You had always been on the outskirts of everything and now it was your turn to be loved. Being able to see and feel the love surrounding you was something foreign and you knew it would take some getting used to. Finally it was your turn to get something that you deserved, something you yearned for. You let your happy thoughts and their steady breaths carry you into dreamland.

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

Next Chapter (Chapter 19)

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katyspersonal · 3 years ago

Note

6 for Micolash, Gehrman, or both (depending on your preference + if this got asked already lmaooooo)

(Ask from this ( x ) meme)

6) Psychological headcanons (tastes, fears, talents, regrets, how they deal with anger, just anything that comes to mind on the topic)

Oh all right... xD I did not expect to get to talk about these characters, but naturally I’ll choose both of them since there are only so many times I get concrete questions!

(For Micolash)

Whereas having plenty of charisma and sly, fascinating appear, he is not actually as ‘chill’ and composed as one could think! He is as much in struggle with anger issues as he is able to mesmerise with his lull-like tone. That is normally. Wearing his cage reduces it significantly, the effect of it on his behaviour is similar to sedating medicine or strong calming herbs.

So, normally, Micolash is quite splitting between roughly ‘a sentimental, sensitive, gentle, dignified intellectual willing to give and receive nurturing (especially in terms of education)’ and ‘a callous, vain, unceremonious, snappy, demanding crazy scientist that only wishes full devotion and worship’. It is however not as easy as to draw clear ‘two states’! His moods (and wishes) shift somewhat chaotically, sometimes hitting severe childlike neediness or complete apathy, too.

No, seriously, he can be hard to understand. Now he is almost yelling at the patient for being ‘pathetic’ and ‘useless’ and (righteously!) scared and tells them they should try to be like Adeline, next day he will hold this same patient’s hand and sob to them about how much he wishes to soothe their emotional suffering if they let him. Or he will mock and tease a close friend about something important for them, and later act bitter if they appear distrustful. Or he will cherish a tiny bug, and then switch heads of a dog and a crow between each other.

He is very good at playing piano. Yes, this one is simply inspired by a deranged piano in his theme, love it a lot. Naturally he is a huge bookworm. He ended up knowing a lot about everything as well - nature, history, literature, all that. Needless to say knowledge about ‘normal’ world soon turned to be useless in his eyes, however he sometimes still ruminates about it fondly.

He has permanent ‘lagging’ in terms of habitual skills - constantly forgets how to tie shoelaces, switches up between cursive and print font chaotically while writing, will not eat or drink until someone reminds him (or rather finds him passing out from starvation), sometimes will catch himself puzzled before staircase or a doorknob trying to remember how to use these... In fact, Nightmare of Mensis nature is a big relief for him, as ‘magic’ practically carries him everywhere (and even lets him run with untied shoelaces and not fall!). In the waking world? Yeah he is often helpless in tiniest things. However even in the Nightmare he’d need help in removing his Mensis Cage if he was to want to remove it because... yeah he forgets how to do it. :’)

Upon meeting new people, Micolash tends to close the distance very soon, sharing too much and developing strong attachment too soon. That lead him to making very intimate friendships fast, however not many are comfortable staying once he shows his “ugly” side too, so ironically he combines that with trust issues and clinginess. Over years in Byrgenwerth as he matured from young student guy into late adult and moreso man of medicine, this had progressed into becoming a huge control freak and manipulator - that was extremely useful when he started School of Mensis, however, so no pain without gain I guess?

He really loves it though when he finds someone who talks a lot; as much as he enjoys lecturing (and simply listening to his own voice xD), he likes to relax just once. He might not say much but he is actually paying attention to everything, even if person is ranting about some nonsense that doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things.

Back in Choir he was almost never wearing Blindfold Cap. All in all presence in the Choir was not pleasant for him - starting from lacking direct eye contact that he needs, personally, ending with the very concept of entrusting one’s mind and will to the ‘stars’ instead of aspiring for becoming one able to find this way. That’s his philosophy. That is also what he believed he was guiding his followers to, failing to realise he ironically himself became a very oppressive leader.

He developed the habit of becoming very distraught and anxious if he is not seeing nightmares for a few nights, fearing it is a sign of something divine ‘abandoning’ him. He believes objective reality could never be peaceful and beautiful and it is always ‘sweet lie’ no matter if a human or a God gives it, finding comfort in horrors and uglyness as result.

For as long as he himself remembers, Micolash is woefully bad at appreciating what he is given until too late, as he overlooked Rom’s unconditional love and respect before she moved onto listening to others (mostly Great Ones), or Damian’s devotion and fatherly patience before Damian started to fear him, not just for him- Heck, he wonders if he disregarded potentially good friendship from Archibald and Izzy too, sometimes. Watch him nevermind Wet Nurse who is by his side and only have his eyes on Kos now, lol!

If he wishes for someone to get beaten, he usually always has someone he can command do that instead, as he watches and gloats, maybe giving ‘advices’ sometimes. However if he is to raise his own hand at someone - he believes they should consider it a very big honour.

As little opinion as he has on the Choir, or people who remained Byrgenwerth students after Healing Church broke away from Willem, sometimes Micolash is stuck feeling sad and cold and yearning that back then they’d been more accepting of him. Deep down he is very lonely and still wishes for genuine love even if he had cast away every chance in the name of knowledge and transcendence.

Speaking of love, he is very bookish and nerdy and it is nearly impossible to flirt with him as he redirects everything to the smart facts and ‘bigger’ things! One might think he doesn’t have an inch of sexuality in him! ...Except for the fullmoons. This is when he becomes extremely sensual.

He tends to feel move vulnerable with women specifically though. This stems from the fact that he doesn’t do mocking laugher before ‘Oh, majestic~’ if you play as female Hunter! In fact, being a woman and angrily yelling at him is the most guaranteed way to wipe the ever-present smug smile from his face, he will feel uneasiness and pit in his stomach that he can’t explain. He just really doesn’t want women to be mean with him, he is in fact desperate for a motherly or mom-girlfriend attitude (with Kos as a peak of this dreaming), though he will try to keep his Big Guy Who’s In Control facade at his best ability.

(For Gehrman)

Gehrman is a strange mix of callous and gentle as well, but unlike Micolash, Gehrman doesn’t suffer from his feelings shifting chaotically! Instead, his curse is that he cannot express his tender side (or even realise it before too late). In younger (?) years, if he was to like someone - he could outright cherish a napkin they dropped like a relic, write a diary page all over with their name, craft them the best gift ever (that he would never actually give) but once that person actually talks to him - the dumbest, the most insensitive shit would leave his mouth! You never know if he is a jerk or just an idiot! He is only in touch with his caring and loving side when he is all alone, which... defeats the purpose.

However, unlike with Micolash that cherishes every single living being (until he doesn’t), Gehrman is consistent in his attitudes. He cherishes only and only and ONLY human life, disregards any of whatever monster/beast/mutant/Kin/God/whatever. This is the dark side of him; though there is something respectable about how much he’s devoted to defending the humanity, but it was number one cause of conflicts between him and Old Hunters that regretted Fishing Hamlet massacre or started to doubt purpose of the hunt.

Nuff said, he is top notch craftsman, with weapons or inventions or clothes. And he is never tired of having to detalize everything - in fact, the more details the better, as he loves to get lost in physical work! In modern era he of course would disdain mass production of whatever... and have a right for it, because he hardworking enough to replace a wholeass assembly line! xD Screw sewing machines as well, he will sew everything with his own hands! Wonder how he is able to accept printed books instead of writing every single one with a pen? xD /j But yes he likes to create things. I like to think that ridiculously elaborate embroidery of Willem’s clothes is his work. And Willem tried to stop him to the more minimal design, but Gehrman was too absorbed to listen.

Although being stuck in the Hunter’s Dream had weakened him mentally, overall Gehrman is an extremely tough guy. To a fault, actually - he bottles up a lot, doesn’t admit his fears and and doesn’t let even close friends to see him cry. Something akin toxic masculinity. He just gotta be a killing machine and a reliable worker rather than a human being, he gotta, you don’t understand! The good part of it is that he is very composed and level-headed when he is angry, he could never snap.

He hasn’t really learned a thing from ‘How to pick up fair maidens’. Think of every possible gag along the lines of ‘person writes a reminder on their palm and reads it all wrong’ or ‘person memorizes a cheesy flirting line but when they say it - the mix up words making it sound like something dumb or awful instead’. Unreal contrast to Micolash’s charisma, huh? Gee I have a blast still comparing these two.

His biggest regret in life is that he failed to be a reliable emotional help for Maria when she needed it during her crisis. He could never forgive himself for it, however he represses these feelings deeply. His second biggest regret in life is eventually animating the Doll through a ritual in the Dream, because loneliness started to drive him insane and he needed an assistant! At first he was feeling very disgusted with himself, to the point of sickness, as if he tainted his most precious memory for a selfish reason. But well, it was for the sake of the hunt too - he was mentally falling apart and sooner or later would have allowed some hunter to kill him to be free! Someone to take turns so not every hunter is on him would be helpful. He still doesn’t know Maria’s soul was summoned within Doll since she remembers exactly nothing, however he feels a bit guilty he failed to explain her how to be more humanlike because... well, he himself doesn’t really know that! He is a little scared of her, too, to the point of not being able to fix the manufacturing errors he made with her face since his hands were shaking too much that time. It just feels too much like touching face of Maria herself, and that is NOT allowed in his eyes, and never will be.

As a jaded Old Man (TM), naturally he has many stories from his life to share! In fact, ones before the whole mess with the dungeons and the hunt and the ascensions are almost equally as interesting! He tends to focus on particularly morbid and violent ones though, lol he doesn’t go to many parties xd

He is in fact waaaaaaaaay more ‘educated’ than expected, and he used to be just as curious as an average high-ranking Byrgenwerth staff! He used to be a teacher there, in fact. After all he did have interest in ascension too when he went at Fishing Hamlet. He also did invent at least two kinds of meteorite-cut weapons with unique properties, he discovered how to use crystallised old blood to enhance weapons, heck, trick weapons themselves as concept are his! He always finds the coolest ways to utilise the most useless materials. Basically he has every kind of talent as a pay-off for little social skills ahaha.

He’s been quite reckless from childhood, and had great instincts. His first ever kill count happened when a rabid dog charged towards him and his first reaction was to grab a sharp metal road and ready to fight it, instead of running. Bullies trying to mess with him as a ‘quiet weird kid’ would end up leaving him alone and declaring he was “crazy” - he never showed signs of fear, as if he was actually ready to die any moment? But maybe he was! Secretly, Gehrman found some dark joy in it when the hunts became a regular thing; the side of him that had him question whether he’s been a ‘callous monster’ all his life finally was useful!

Speaking of which, despite tender feelings that Gehrman possesses, he has less than average morality and through his life only adopts bits and pieces of it based on reaction of others - if it is strong enough. Like how he never felt in the wrong about Fishing Hamlet until something ‘moved’ in him seeing how much Maria, whose opinion mattered for him, was horrified and broken about it. Lives of innocent fish people? pfffffft! Disappointing a person he was trying to impress, however? Oh god oh fuck. ‘Protecting humanity from inhuman things’ is the one consistent principle he can hold onto as it is simple and direct, but finding evil within humanity is... complicated.

#bloodborne #micolash host of the nightmare #gehrman the first hunter #ask replies #bloodborne headcanons #thank you for the ask!#i love to talk about these characters!#they are very contrasting however both have sides that are not supposed to coexist haha

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yourlocalfictionalenthusiast · 4 years ago

Text

IN LIFE, IN DEATH..

Part Two

Part One

Warnings: swearing

‘Carefully, you reached towards the piano and tried to touch a vase of flowers but they passed right through your fingers. Your entire hand went numb then a tingly feeling spread throughout your body.

Well, two things were for sure.

You were definitely back, but you were definitely dead.’

“(Y/n)?”

Alex appeared by your side, pulling your hand away from the vase that you couldn’t seem to stop sticking your hand through.

You had been so distracted, you didn’t realize that the girl had come back until you heard her scream. Alex covered his ears and shouted over the noise.

“Please stop screaming!” He shouted.

She did, but she kept eyeing the four of you suspiciously.

She was holding a cross out as she slowly stepped into the room. Her eyes were still wide with fear but she stood her ground. “Who are you and what are you doing in my mom’s studio?”

Luke gave her a look of confusion as he stepped forward. “Your mom’s studio? No, this is our studio.”

He yelped as she came at him with the cross. He jumped up on the piano and slid across the surface. “The grand piano is new, and-”

Luke cut himself off suddenly and in a fit of excited giggles, he ran towards the other side of the room. “My couch!”

You watched as he ran his hands over the worn leather, a dreamy look on his face. Despite the situation, you couldn’t help but laugh a little. After your time in the dark room, it was comforting to see some things never change.

Luke’s eyes flickered up to the ceiling, his eyebrows knitting together as he inspected the lights and chairs hanging down and you were reminded that more things had changed than stayed the same.

You decided you couldn’t take it anymore. You had to get to the bottom of this. And to do that, you needed the boys to focus for more than a few seconds.

“Boys, can I see you over here for a minute?” You said, gently leading Alex and Reggie away and gesturing for Luke to follow before turning back to the frightened girl.

“Excuse us for a second.”

You gave her an apologetic smile and shuffled over to the other side of the garage with the boys in tow. Once you got far enough away, Luke frantically whispered. “What is going on? How did she get her stuff in here so fast?”

“Maybe she’s a witch. I mean, chairs are floating on the ceiling.” Reggie exclaimed. You could feel Alex glaring at him as you placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“There’s no such thing as witches, Reg.” You said.

“You sure? Cause I used to think that there was no such thing as ghosts.”

Alex nodded reluctantly. “That’s fair.”

“Okay,” Luke butted in, “So, we’re going with witch?”

“No!” Alex scoffed. “We’re not going with witch. Look, she’s just scared. Let someone with a softer touch handle this.”

He turned towards the girl and approached her slowly before practically yelling in her face. “Why are you in our studio?!”

“Real soft, Al.” You whispered to him before extending your hand out to her, wincing at the awkwardness once you realized that like the vase, you probably couldn’t touch her either.

“I’m really sorry we scared you. I’m-”

Before you could finish, she jabbed her arms forward until the cross went clean through your chest. The tingling sensation came back in full force and you resisted the urge to shiver.

“Oh my gosh! How did you do that?” Her eyes were wide and unblinking as she stared at you.

“Clearly she doesn’t get it.” Alex said, turning back to the boys and then back to her, obviously exasperated. “We’re ghosts, okay? We’re just four ghosts who are really happy to be home.”

“We’re actually in a band called Sunset Curve.” Luke explained, his tone full of pride like it always was when he talked about the band.

“Tell your friends!” Reggie piped up with his signature line and you snorted. It was nice to know that even in death, Reggie was still the best hype-man.

“Last night was supposed to be a big night for us.” Luke said. “It was supposed to change our lives.”

“I’m pretty sure it did.” Alex interjected.

“This is freaking me out!” The girl shouted, keeping one hand held out towards you with the cross and the other pulling something out of her back pocket which she began frantically tapping on.

“What is that?” Luke asked, and the girl rolled her eyes.

“It’s my phone.” She cursed herself and shook her head. “No! Stop talking to them. They aren’t real. There is no such thing as cute ghosts.”

Reggie flashed her a dopey smile. “You think we’re cute?”

You rolled your eyes and Alex leaned forward. “Who are you calling?”

“I’m googling Sunset Swerve.”

You couldn’t help the surprised giggle that escaped your mouth as the boys groaned in unison. “Sunset Curve!”

Over Alex’s shoulder, you could see the bright screen of her phone as she pulled up an article. At the top was your professional band picture you had taken a year before the Orpheum. Luke was goofing around and playing Alex’s leg like a guitar while you stood by his side, sticking a finger in Bobby’s ear.

“Whoa.” She muttered. “There is a Sunset Curve and you did die. But not last night.”

You tried to keep your composure as she turned to look at the four of you, the fear in her eyes replaced with a small trace of sympathy. “25 years ago?”

“What? No, that’s impossible. After we floated out of the ambulance all we did was go to that dark room where these two cried.” Reggie gestured between you and Alex.

“Well, I think we were all pretty upset.” Alex said in his high pitched voice that usually made you laugh, but the mention of the dark room made you remember your moment with Luke. You turned around to look at him only to find him several feet behind you, eyes focused on a spot on the wall just past you.

The fact that he was still avoiding you didn’t escape you, but you forced yourself to swallow the sad feeling and focus on the issue at hand.

“But that was just for like an hour.” Luke said. Despite the tension between you, the sound of his worried tone made your heart ache. “We just showed up here.”

The girl sighed. “I’m just telling you what my phone says. You died in 1995 when you were 17. It’s now 2020.”

“So, this is the future?” Reggie asked.

Your head was spinning. There was no way it had been that long, right?

“It’s really been 25 years? I’ve been crying for 25 years, how is that possible!?” Alex shouted. You rubbed his back softly.

“You’re an emotional person.” Reggie shrugged.

“I am not!” He said, his high-pitched voice coming back as he pouted.

Just then, an unfamiliar voice chimed in. “I thought you were too afraid to come out here.”

You turned around to see a kid standing in the doorway, smiling as he came into the room. “You talking to your ghost friend? Is he hideous?”

“He can see you.” Alex snorted, bumping Reggie with his shoulder.

“No, he can’t.” The girl blurted, receiving a weird look from the younger kid.

She asked him what he wanted and he rolled his eyes. “A normal sister for starters, now stop being weird and come eat.”

The girl blinked at the garage doors her brother had just exited from before looking back at Alex. “He couldn’t see you.”

“Well, yeah. That’s kinda how ghosts work.” Alex said.

The girl huffed and marched towards the doors, spinning on her heels to face you again. “Look, I’m sorry for what happened to you guys, but this isn’t your studio anymore. You have to leave.”

“Wait.” Luke took a step towards her. “We didn’t get your name.”

“It’s Julie.”

“Cool.” Luke smiled. “I’m Luke, by the way, and this is…”

“Reggie! Hey.”

“I’m Alex, how’s it going?”

“I’m (Y/n).” You waved to her awkwardly as Luke stretched out his arms and made a little ‘tad-da’ sound.

“Okay...” Julie said before disappearing out the doors.

“Julie seems nice.” Reggie said brightly, making Alex sigh.

“Did you miss the part where she kicked us out?”

As you patted Reggie’s shoulder, your eyes drifted up to the loft where you could see the outline of more instruments. “Alex, aren’t those your drums?”

Alex followed your gaze and poofed up to the loft. “All of our instruments are up here!”

Luke immediately shot up from the couch where he had been sulking and faced you and Reggie with a mischievous grin on his face.

Half an hour later, you had your instruments set up in the middle of the room. Once it all came together, you could almost convince yourself you were back in the old studio having a normal band practice. The boys must have felt the same way because before you know it, you were singing as loud as you could as Luke played the opening of ‘Long Weekend’

You got lost in the music, smiling and dancing around. Even though it felt like it had only been a few hours since you sang at the soundcheck, it had been 25 years. It was as if everything you didn’t get to feel in all that time started pouring out.

You felt like you were floating - and not in the ghost kind of way.

It wasn’t until you heard Julie’s annoyed rambles that you came back to reality. You stopped singing and the boys followed, though Luke couldn’t resist doing an extra few riffs on his guitar.

“The whole neighborhood can hear you!” Julie yelled. “I thought I told you to leave.”

“Wait, people can hear us play?” Luke asked. Your stomach fluttered with hope as Julie sighed.

“Yes! And so did my dad and my brother.”

Alex stood up from his drums. “So, only you can see us, but everyone can hear us? What kind of ghosts are we?”

Luke gave him a fistbump. “Who cares, man? People can hear us play!”

Suddenly, the door swung open and a man stepped in.

Julie smiled nervously. “Dad!”

“Hey, I was just making sure you’re okay.” He smiled.

“I’m fine. I just had to turn off the CD player.”

Julie’s dad nodded before turning around and looking at your instruments. “Is this the junk that was in the loft?”

“Junk?” You and Luke scoffed. His eyes flickered to yours but you looked away as the man started tapping on Alex’s drums with his fingers.

“Hey, man! Tell him to stop touching my drums!” Alex complained. Julie just shrugged as the man pointed to the CD player.

“I liked that song you had on.”

“Sweet! We’re Sunset Curve.” Luke cheered.

“Tell your friends!” Reggie said as if he could hear him.

“It’s just an old CD I found.” Julie explained.

Her dad smiled. “Well, it’s still nice to hear you listening to music again. Out here you can play whatever you want, whenever you want.”

Something in his voice was a little sad even with the smile on his face, and you noticed something seemed a little heavier about Julie too. You got the sense that the conversation wasn’t just about music.

He stretched his arms and they went straight through Reggie and Luke’s chests. They both shivered but smiled brightly.

“That’s nice.” Reggie said, which made Julie sigh in frustration.

“Stay out of this.” She snapped and her dad gave her a confused look and started to apologize. Julie shook her head frantically.

“No, no. Not you. You know what? Just give me a minute.” She grabbed her dad’s arm and started leading him out of the garage.

Before he stepped out, he gave her a squeeze on the shoulder. “We’ll figure out this music program thing.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

He gave her one more reassuring smile before he disappeared out the doors.

Julie paused for a moment, seemingly lost in thought. You were just about to ask if she was okay when she whirled around and glared at all of you. If you weren’t already dead, you’re pretty sure that her stare would’ve killed you.

“He liked our song!” Luke yelled.

“He doesn’t count. He’s a dad.” Alex said.

Julie stomped her foot. “Why can’t you just be normal ghosts? Go haunt an old mansion or something! I heard Pasadena is nice!”

She stormed out and Alex whistled. “I think she’s warming up to us.”

“I’ve always wanted to go to Pasadena.” Reggie said.

“I feel bad.” You admitted. “I mean, if I was her, I’d probably be pissed too.”

“I don’t think-” Alex started, but before he could finish, Luke poofed out of the garage.

“Rude.”

It was quiet for a few seconds before you heard Luke’s voice just outside the studio. You pointed towards the doors and Alex and Reggie nodded.

You closed your eyes and focused on where you wanted to go. Within seconds, you were standing on the pavement of the driveway, facing Julie as she and Luke talked.

“Look, I’m sorry we came into your life.” Luke said. “But what I just felt in there actually made me feel alive again.”

He looked back to the three of you and you nodded.

“We all felt alive again.” Luke sighed. “So, you can kick us out if you want. But we’re not going to stop playing music. I mean, we can play again! That’s a gift that no musician would give up. You gotta know that. I mean, clearly your mom is into music.”

Julie’s look shifted from understanding to sadness. She took a deep breath. “Was. She passed away.”

Luke exhaled. You could tell he was beating himself up a bit as he chewed on his lip. “I am so sorry.”

“Yeah, we didn’t know.” Alex said. Reggie nodded solemnly behind him.

“It’s okay.” Julie shoved her hands in her pockets and looked at Alex. “You haven’t seen her anywhere, have you? Like from wherever you’re from.”

“Uh, no. I mean you’re kinda the first person we’ve seen.” Alex said.

“Yeah, but she’s not dead so that doesn’t answer her question.” Reggie piped up, making Alex roll his eyes.

“I think she knows what we mean.” Alex turned to Julie. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

Julie’s gaze fixed on her shoes and she shrugged. “Thanks. Sorry I got mad. You guys are kinda good.”

“Kinda?” Luke scoffed. “That’s just 25 years of rust getting dusted off.”

“Yeah.” Reggie agreed. “Do you play piano too?”

Julie shook her head, a sad smile on her face as she stared through the studio’s window. “No, that’s just my mom’s stuff in there.”

“No way! She’s an amazing songwriter.” Luke said.

“She was.” Julie tore her eyes away from the garage. “Wait, how do you know that?”

Luke shrugged. “There’s a song on the piano, if that’s hers…Your mom was really talented.”

You nodded and Julie scanned all of you one last time. “I guess, if you need a place to stay…you can stay in there.”

You all cheered and Julie rubbed her temples. “This is just too weird.”

“Thanks, Julie.” You said. The other girl gave you a weak smile before she disappeared behind the gate leading back to the house.

An hour later, as you paced around the garage, you got an idea. Your hand flew to the front pocket of your jeans and you turned to Alex. “Hey, Al. I’ll be right back.”

Before he had a chance to ask why, you had poofed away.

It didn’t take long before your feet landed on the doorstep of the house. You wandered inside and it took a full minute of searching before you arrived at Julie’s bedroom door.

You tried to knock, but your hand went straight through the wood. You cleared your throat. “Hey, Julie?”

“Come in.” Julie said.

Carefully, you stepped through the door and into her bedroom. It was decorated a lot like the garage, with bright lights and pretty paintings. Julie sat in the middle of the room on her bed, and even though you probably couldn’t sleep anymore, you wanted nothing more than to lay down and take a nap.

“Hi. I’m sorry to bother you.” You fiddled with the zipper of your jacket. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry about your mom.”

The friendly smile she had wavered before she nodded sadly. “Thanks. I’m sorry again for freaking out back there. I guess I just still kinda think of it as her place.”

“Don’t be sorry!” You told her. “Believe me, I wouldn't have handled it as well as you did.

I know we’re a lot to handle sometimes. And by ‘we’ I mean the boys.”

You both laughed and Julie shrugged. “They’re not so bad. As far as ghosts go I would’ve expected them to be a lot scarier.”

“It’s really nice of you to let us stay. But I’m sure we can find somewhere else to go. I wouldn't want to intrude on your mom’s space.”

“No!” She said, sitting up slightly against her pillows, “I think it’s what she would’ve wanted.”

“She sounds like an incredible person.” You said.

“She was.” She nodded. She took a deep breath in, “It’s just kind of hard to talk about her sometimes.”

You nodded. “I understand. My dad died before I was born. All I really have of him are a few pieces of clothes and this picture.”

You reached into the pocket of your jeans, pulled out a polaroid picture and handed it to Julie. It was of your mom and dad on the day they got engaged: your mom showing off her ring and your dad unable to stop smiling as he kissed the crown of her head.

It had been on you since the day your mom gave it to you with a box of his old things. The sight of your mom made your heart wince, but you weren’t ready to think about that yet.

Julie smiled as she stared at the picture then pointed to your jacket. “Is that his?”

It was a dark blue hoodie with sleeves that were a little too long for your arms so you had to bunch them up to fit your hands through.

“Oh, uh. No, this is Luke’s.” You explained, trying to fight the blush spreading across your cheeks. “Or at least it was before he waged a war on sleeves.”

Julie laughed again, and you couldn’t help but feel a little lighter.

“Anyway, I know it’s not the same,” You took the photo back and shoved it in your pocket. “But I do know what it’s like to miss someone, and if you ever want to talk about how much it sucks, I’ve been told I’m a pretty good listener.”

She nodded, a grateful smile on her face. “Thanks, (Y/n).”

You nodded and waved goodbye before poofing back into the garage.

Between working at Cece’s, going to school, and making music, you never had much time to make friends when you were alive. Especially girl friends.

But you were starting to think that maybe you could have one now.

July 1994

“Slow down!”

You yelled over the noise of the crowds, your tone sounding a lot less intimidating than you wanted due to your laughter as Luke dragged you up the boardwalk.

He responded with a smirk over his shoulder while he waved through dozens of excited carnival-goers. The smell of fried food, funnel cake, and fresh ocean air flooded your senses as you tried to stay on your feet. The pace was almost dizzying, and your body was buzzing from the excitement.

You hadn’t realized where he was taking you until you saw an array of flashing neon lights spinning above you. The Ferris wheel.

“Seriously, Luke?”

“It’s tradition.” He beamed, fidgeting excitedly as he got in the line. It was not lost on you that he was still holding your wrist in his left hand. “I mean, can you even remember the last time we did this?”

You didn’t. But you weren’t going to prove Luke’s point for him.

“Next, please.” The ride operator gestured for the line to move up and before you knew it, Luke was shoving you into the cart. It was a faded red one with a ‘7’ painted on the side.

“You know, it’s okay to admit that you only dragged me over here to avoid everyone seeing me kick your ass at Skee ball.” You joked.

The ride started and your cart was lifted into the air while more people got on.

“Excuse you, I dragged you over here because I wanted to spend time with my best friend.” He said sincerely, but you could see the mischief behind his eyes. “Or maybe I wanted to do this!”

Luke suddenly jerked forward, then pulled himself back, making the cart wobble.

“Luke!” You gripped the support bar and glared at him. Once your heartbeat righted itself, you shoved him with your shoulder. “You’re hilarious.”

“About time you admitted it.”

The ride spun around a few times before slowing to a stop just as you reached the top. The sun was gone now, but there were still soft streaks of pink in the sky left behind. The noise of the carnival faded out beneath you and the playful mood shifted into something different as the sky began to darken.

“Are you cold?” He asked, looking back at you for the first time in a few moments. Something in his eyes seemed softer, but you tore your eyes away before you could figure out what it was.

You shook your head and tried to hide the fact that you had goosebumps from the cool night air. Despite Alex’s reminders, you had forgotten your jacket in the car. But you were too stubborn to admit that you needed it, especially knowing how much Luke would tease you for it.

“Dude, you’re shivering.” Luke laughed and rolled his eyes before shrugging his jacket off his shoulders and wrapping it around you.

The material was warm and soft against your skin. It smelled faintly like cinnamon and laundry detergent and suddenly your head felt dizzy all over again. "Thanks, Lu."

You weren't sure what gave you the confidence for your next move, but you ignored the screaming voice in your head as you slid over and tilted your head until it rested on his shoulder. It was something you’d done before out of comfort, but you felt out of your element in this moment.

Some hair on the top of your head ruffled as he took a deep breath and you could hear the soft smile in his voice when he spoke.

“Anytime.”

There was a moment of anticipation, like just before a big drop on a rollercoaster. Neither of you dared break the silence for fear of shattering the moment and the feeling that came with it. Just as it seemed like maybe it would last forever, the Ferris wheel suddenly moved forward and the moment evaporated.

"So." You said, trying to distract yourself from the fluttering in your stomach. "How much do you wanna bet that I actually can kick your ass at Skee Ball?"

Taglist:

@ifilwtmfc @instabull

Let me know if you want to be added!

#luke patterson #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson imagine #julie molina #reggie peters #alex mercer #jatp fanfic

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firstofficerwiggles · 4 years ago

Text

Only for You

Pairing: Mandalorian x female reader

Rating: G

Warnings: None

Summary: You like to sing and it ends up bringing you closer to the Mandalorian. Events take place sometime between Seasons 1 and 2. It’s pretty much fluff with a teeny bit of story.

Word Count: ~4600

Author’s Note: Inspired by the Adele version of Make You Feel My Love, I use several of the lyrics in the story but I did make one small change to make it fit the SW universe. Also in my SW universe, all Earth music is readily available by some magical means, don’t overthink it.

P.S. To everyone I tagged, I did a presumptive tag here since you were on my list for Dress Code and I thought maybe you’d enjoy reading this too? I’m sorry if you aren’t interested and just let me know if you don’t want to be tagged for any future works.

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The soft sounds of you singing to the child drift through the Razor Crest up to the cockpit making Din smile under his helmet. Ever since you came aboard to be the caregiver for his little foundling, life has been filled with music and boisterous sounds. It’s a nice change from the lonely silences that previously filled his days. He never really listened to music when he was alone, it just wasn’t something he was used to, but now he knows he would miss it if you weren’t singing all the time.

“Heeey, hey baby, I wanna know-ow-ow, if you’ll be my guy.” You sing to the child causing him to giggle and coo at you. You swear he is even bopping his head along to the rhythm of the song. You’re preparing the evening meal, dancing around the Crest’s hull and singing to your little green charge as you do. Thank goodness Mando doesn’t mind how much you sing and generally create a ruckus in the ship. From outward appearances, your primary worry should have been Mando’s dangerous lifestyle and the bounty on the child, but honestly, when you first started this job, your primary concern was about being way too noisy for the taciturn bounty hunter. You feel like you can’t help it though because you were raised in a loud household with three brothers where everyone was always talking, laughing, shouting, and generally being rowdy. Later, you were away at school living with hundreds of other students constantly surrounded by racket, the perfect environment for your noisy nature. Not to mention, you’ve always loved to sing and were known for being that one (slightly annoying) friend that was always humming a tune or breaking out in song like you were in a musical.

You were fortunate to be sent to a school with a great arts program and you relished your music classes. You had dreamed of someday being able to have a career in music, but as the war grew closer to your corner of the galaxy, those aspirations quickly faded. By the time you left school, you were lucky to find the odd teaching job as a tutor and the closest you’d come to having any sort of musical profession was singing and playing the piano at the local cantina a few times a week for tips. It had been fun for a while, but it wasn’t how you had envisioned your life. Playing the same requested songs night after night while increasingly drunk men hit on you loses its charm real fast. When your older brother, another bounty hunter, had told you about Mando needing some help with childcare, you had jumped at the opportunity for something new. So far it was proving to be the most rewarding job you’d ever had. Not only was the child unbelievably adorable, you’d also had the opportunity to travel to many new places and gain experiences that would have been impossible back on your home world. And while caring for the special alien baby was your main task, you found yourself helping out his father as much as you could too whether it was simply cleaning up around the Crest or making sure that Mando ate something on a given day. You had seen that he frequently put everyone above himself, going for long stretches of time without seeing to his own personal needs. He seemed to appreciate everything that you did for him, always quick to thank you even for the smallest of tasks.

You checked the timer on the food and saw that there were just a few more minutes until it would be ready. To keep the baby from getting fussy, you pick him up and spin him around a bit singing to him again, “So won’t you, please, be my, be my, be my little baby, my one and only baby...” It’s silly but you love singing songs to him with the word “baby” in them even if they aren’t traditionally songs for children. You are mid twirl with the child when you realize the Mandalorian has come down from the cockpit and is watching your little performance. You feel your cheeks heat up, a bit embarrassed that he has caught you being such a dork, but then he puts you at ease when he chuckles, “You two look like you’re having fun.”

“Yes, time for dinner and a little dancing,” you reply with a smile, twirling the child one more time causing him to erupt in happy giggles.

“Good, I’m starved,” Mando wanders over to the food, “Smells delicious. You’re too good to us.”

You put the baby back down and turn back to the little stove to dish out the stew you’ve made. You try not to think about the fact that you made this particular dish because Mando seems to like it so much. You couldn’t be certain but it looked like he licked the bowl clean the last time you made it. Mando moves to take his bowl up to the cockpit so he can remove his helmet and eat in privacy, but then turns to you to say, “I’ll let you know when it’s ok to come up for lullaby time.”

Ah yes, lullaby time, as if you would ever forget. It is the highlight of your day, and you would love to imagine that the same is true for Mando even though he’s never given any indication of the kind. When you first started this job, you had tried to give the Mandalorian as much space as possible not wanting to pester him in any way. As much as you could, you had stayed out of the cockpit treating it as his own private domain. So the first few times you put the child to bed, you stayed down in the hull as you sang him a few songs to help ease the little womp rat into sleep. But, after a few evenings alone like that, Mando had managed to be downstairs, tinkering away at little odd jobs while you put the baby to bed. At first you didn’t really think he was paying much attention to your singing, but by about the fourth night you realized he had been cleaning the same blaster over and over, and you began to suspect that he was listening to you as intently as the child. A few days later, he suggested that you come up to the cockpit for the child’s nighttime routine, saying “Maybe looking out at the stars will help him feel sleepy.” You had agreed, but, you had to admit, that it was more because you were curious about spending more time with your employer than finding a way to help the little one fall asleep faster. Mando had been the one to coin the term “lullaby time” as a way to let you know that his helmet was back on and he was ready for company. Your heart almost melted the first time he said it, and now you lived to hear him call down to say “Ok, you two, it’s lullaby time.”

In the cockpit, Din is gulping down his dinner. He knows he should probably slow down, savor his food a bit more, but truthfully he’s eager to spend more time with you and the child. He’s thought about staying down below with you both when he eats, but tipping the helmet up each time he wants to take a bite of food or a sip of a drink is a pain and he can’t risk the chance that one of you will see too much of his face. Din would never admit it out loud, but lullaby time is his favorite part of the day. It’s the one time he gets to spend time with you and the child just relaxing and enjoying your presence. Plus the fact that he gets to listen to your beautiful voice is a special bonus. At first Din would just watch you hold the child and sing to him, but now he’s a more active participant, often taking the child into his arms, rocking him gently as you sing to the both of them. He’s even started to ask you more about the songs you sing and where you learned them. It’s been a nice way to start conversations with you, to know more about you, something else he is eager to do.

When Mando calls down to you, you beam down at the baby and tell him happily that it’s time to get ready for bed. Scooping him up, you climb the ladder to the cockpit and you can see Mando already holding out his arms for the little one. You adore how affection this hardened warrior can be with his adopted son. You settle in the co-pilot’s chair as you start to sing some of your favorite songs. They’re all love songs, not really lullabies, but they are soft and dreamy and create the right mood for the evening. You’ve sung about four songs when you notice the child’s eyes are closed and you can tell he’s almost asleep. You’re about ready to collect him from Mando so you can put him into his pram for the night, when Mando asks, “What’s that song you sing about feel my love?”

“Make You Feel My Love?” you ask, “Is that the one you mean?”

“Yeah,” he replies, “you didn’t sing it tonight.”

It’s not exactly a request, but you understand what he’s hinting at. He’s asked you the name before, so you suspect he remembers the song fairly well. Even though the child is practically asleep now, you sing it for Mando, feeling touched that he must enjoy this particular song to want to ask about it.

When the rain is blowing in your face

And the whole world is on your case

I could offer you a warm embrace

To make you feel my love

When the evening shadows and the stars appear

And there is no one there to dry your tears

I could hold you for a million years

To make you feel my love

Din listens to the beautiful words and the haunting melody as your voice sings to him about all the ways you would show him that you care. He watches your lovely face as you sing and he imagines that you really mean what you are singing, that you’re singing it just to him, that you really would do all of that for him. When you get to the line I could make you happy, make your dreams come true he feels his heart lurch at the truth in those words, knowing how much you already make him happy every day and acknowledging that if you were ever truly with him, it would be like a dream come true for him. As the song ends, he sighs, both contented at hearing it but also saddened to come back to reality. Din won’t let himself believe that a woman like you could ever really love him so unconditionally. His life is too turbulent, full of violence and hardship, and what woman would want to saddle herself with that?

Even though you’re not privy to Mando’s true feelings, you somehow feel that you could tell how much he enjoyed hearing that song and so after that evening, you are sure to sing it as the last song every night. Usually the child is already fast asleep when you sing it, so each time it becomes clearer to you that you really are singing it just for Mando. As the days and week progress, lullaby time has come to be followed by conversation time since you have taken to returning to the cockpit after putting the child to sleep in his pram. At first you mostly spoke about your own life, answering Mando’s questions about where you learned to sing, what else you learned at school, and what life was like with your three crazy brothers. Yet, little by little he has begun to tell you about his own past, sharing stories about his training in the Mandalorian fighting corps and his earlier years as a bounty hunter.

The more you find out about Mando, the more you’ve come to develop real feelings for him. So when you sing that there’s nothing that you wouldn’t do for him, that you want him to feel your love, you know you really mean it. If only you could bring yourself to tell him in your own words, and not only in the song. Nonetheless, if you’re honest with yourself, you have no indication that Mando shares your feelings even slightly. While he does seem to enjoy spending time with you, and clearly he likes Make You Feel My Love, truthfully he could be thinking about anyone when you sing it or it could be that he just likes the music and the company, it’s not like there’s someone else here. Sure he’s always polite and kind towards you, but he’s like that with lots of people, as long as they’re not a threat. You’ve seen how quickly he can make friends, despite being an intimidating wall of metal, his quiet charm and respectfulness draws people to him in an unassuming manner. Perhaps you’re simply another friendly admirer swept up by his intriguing aura. So you do your best to keep these feeling to yourself, maintaining as neutral an expression as you can when you sing to him and doing your utmost not to embarrass yourself by sharing too much and potentially ruining the friendly companionship you’ve managed to cultivate.

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“I don’t think this will take too long, and you two can probably get something to eat while we’re here.” You and the child have accompanied Mando to a cantina on an icy planet where he has a meeting with a potential client. It was too cold to stay on the Razor Crest with its meager heating system, and thankfully this place is warm and doesn’t seem too seedy. The bar top looks well-polished and there’s even a piano in here, hinting at a nicer atmosphere than most of the hole-in-the wall joints you’ve been to with Mando. The only unsettling thing is how everyone in the cantina is staring at your odd little group, the silver warrior, the alien baby in his floating pram, and you, the woman looking about with curious eyes. You have never quite gotten used to the way that Mando can silence an entire room just by entering it, but he seems unperturbed by the stares. He spots his client, an older looking gentleman, and moves toward that direction, but a group of patrons have decided to intervene first.

“What’s your business here, Mandalorian?” A tall, florid-faced man demands. He seems to be the unofficial leader of the group, as the rest of them are looking to him as the voice of authority.

“It’s not with you.” Mando is never one to mince words.

“We don’t need you coming in here and causing trouble, I’ve seen how you Mandos get.” A much shorter man, with clearly a death wish, sticks his finger towards Mando’s chest plate almost poking him.

“Not here for trouble.” Mando’s voice sounds gruffer than usual and it sends a shiver down your spine.

“Well you Mandos never drink in public, so what are you doing in a cantina?” The short man sneers at him and ugh, the way he makes Mandos sound like a dirty word irritates you to no end.

Not one to be baited into confrontation, Mando says nothing in reply, but merely tilts his helmet at the man, and you can feel the annoyance in his gesture.

“This a decent place for decent people, so why don’t you just turn around and get out of here?” The tall man suggests with a malicious tone to his voice. This place might look at little nicer, but the patrons sure are nasty. You look around and see more men standing up, and the tension in the room is palpable. You know Mando could really use the work, but the last thing he needs is to get into a fight just trying to land the job.

You have no idea what possesses you, but before you know it you’re saying “But if we leave now, you won’t get to hear me sing!” And you stride confidently over to the piano, plop yourself down on the bench, and begin playing out a jaunty song, a popular tune from your cantina back home. Despite the fact that everyone is now staring at you like you have lost your mind, you press ahead and start singing as if this was always the point of being there. You smile brightly at the room as if you are having the time of your life performing for them. Magically, your ridiculous ploy works and the men back off, a bit startled at first by the abrupt change in energy in the room, but as they beginning listening to you sing their animosity seems to drain away. Several other patrons are nodding their heads along with the music and light conversation picks up again. Mando gives you a small nod before finally making his way over to the client. You let the music flow and continue on to another song, keeping everyone’s attention on you. By the third song you feel more relaxed and grateful that you’re able to help Mando out in this way. A waiter comes over from the bar with a drink for you as you end a song, “That was smooth, what you did,” he gives you a little wink.

“Hope your boss doesn’t mind,” you say with a smile.

“The drink’s from him, he said he didn’t realize I hired a singer for tonight, but he’s real pleased with you.” He gestures to the man tending bar.

“That’s good,” is all you can think to say in response.

“Do you know She’s Always a Woman?” he asks. You nod smoothly and start the song and you glance over at the bartender again and see that he’s smiling widely, must be a favorite of his.

After that, a tip jar finds its way over to the piano and patrons come up to add to it and make their own requests, even the tall man comes over to give you a few credits and ask for a song. His cronies are now back to their drinks and none of them even seem to register that Mando is still here. The more you sing, the more you get into the fun of performing for a crowd again, making them forget their troubles and letting them take some time to enjoy themselves. When you glimpse towards Mando and his client, they also seem to appreciate the music. The client has a happy smile on his face and while you obviously can’t see Mando’s expression, his relaxed posture indicates an improvement from earlier. He doesn’t seem to be in a hurry to leave for once either.

Looking at the pleased faces and jovial manner about the cantina now, Din is impressed with how you managed to transform this place from hostile to welcoming in a matter of minutes. The client appreciated your help too as he was worried about hiring a bounty hunter in the first place, never having had a need for such services before. Fortunately, the client’s explanation of the job was fairly straightforward and it looks to be an easy bounty. Din is careful to repeat back all of the pertinent details to the client and the man seems satisfied in his abilities to find the quarry, which is good because his usual laser-like focus has abandoned him and he can’t stop himself from glancing repeatedly over to the piano and you. Normally, Din wouldn’t hang around and socialize with the client, but the opportunity to see you perform like this is too good to pass up. He knew you were talented after hearing you sing for him and the baby for so many evenings, but seeing you shine like this is a luxury. Din watches keenly as different emotions play across your gorgeous face as you shift from happy, upbeat songs to the more expressive and dramatic love songs. You are always beautiful to Din, but seeing you like this is special, like you’re glowing from within and it makes you all the more precious to him. He’s not crazy about the fact that you’ve clearly captivated at least half of the men in the room with your beauty and talent, but he knows you’re leaving here with him and it makes him feel rather smug. As Din listens to you sing a love song about how you think about the man you love night and day, he indulges in a fantasy where the song is about the two of you, especially when you sing about spending your life making love to him. It’s easy to imagine especially when you keep looking over at him with such an outright flirtatious expression during the song.

Under the guise of performing, you let yourself look at Mando with all of the desire and love you’ve been keeping under wraps for so long now. You’re careful to let your eyes roam around the room, flirting with the other patrons too, but every time you turn back towards Mando you let your gaze soften a bit more. As the evening wears on, you let yourself sing all of your favorite love songs, telling Mando how you feel with each one, promising that you’ll love him forever, that you’ll never let him go, and how he’s the only one for you. You know you’re just pretending that he understands why you’re singing each one, that they’re all for him. The only song you can’t bring yourself to sing is Make You Feel My Love. It seems too personal, too private to perform in front of all these strangers.

The crowd at the cantina starts to thin out and you know you’ve been here much longer than Mando originally planned. You decide it’s time to bring this interlude to an end and thank your audience for their attention, playing one last song to say good night. When the music ends, you stand and take a small bow to the round of applause. You collect your tips and an additional unexpected payment from the bartender, along with several requests to come back again soon. Mando is back at your side and he places a hand at the small of your back guiding you out the door and into the snowy night. You expect him to pull away once you are out of the crowd, but he stays close to you.

“Thank you for that impromptu performance.” He deep voice rumbles in your ear as you head back to the Razor Crest, “It was a welcome distraction from those idiots and I appreciated not having to get into a bar brawl.”

“Anything to lend you a helping hand,” you reply warmly.

He nods, and then says, “You’re really very talented. You could do well for yourself, singing full time in a nice cantina or a casino somewhere.”

“Tonight was fun enough, but I’ve had my time singing in a cantina, it gets old faster than you think,” you tell him, “besides why would I give up the best job in the galaxy?”

“The best job in the galaxy?” Mando scoffs a little at that.

“Sure it is! I get to travel around all over seeing all kinds of planets and people, take care of the most adorable magic baby ever, and spend time with his amazing father.” Oops, did you just say that last part out loud?

Mando is quiet for a beat, but then he says, “You’re the amazing one.”

You’re too shocked to say anything more than a mumbled, “Thanks” and hurry towards the Crest.

Once aboard you check on the baby, but he’s already asleep, so all you do is tuck his blanket around him a little more and then climb up to the cockpit where Mando is readying the controls for take-off. Even though you’re still a bit embarrassed by your unplanned compliment earlier, his response has made you curious. You sit quietly as you leave the planet’s atmosphere and the ship makes the jump to hyperspace, the whole time racking your brain for the right words so that maybe you can finally give Mando a clue about your feelings. You’re about to give up, when he says, “You didn’t sing Make You Feel My Love tonight.”

“Ah, no, no I didn’t.” Maker, you want to tell him why, but the words are frozen in your throat.

“That’s my favorite song.” Mando finally admits to you.

“I thought it might be,” you say, “that’s why I sing it every night.”

“But not tonight?”

You take a deep breath. He’s giving you the perfect opportunity and you gather all your courage as you tell him, “It felt too personal to share such an intimate song with all of those people. When- when I sing that song, your song, it’s only for you.”

“My song?” You swear his voice gets deeper when he tries to clarify what you mean.

“Yes, that’s how I think of it now.” You look at his visor where you think his eyes must be, trying to silently confess to him what that song means to you.

“My song.” Mando repeats, before asking, “Do you know why it’s my favorite?”

“No, I- I really don’t. I just knew you liked it when you asked me about it a couple times.”

He’s quiet again for a moment and you wonder if he’s going to elaborate when he finally says, “It’s my favorite song because I imagine that you really mean what you’re singing, that you’re singing it to me for real.”

“I am singing it to you for real,” you finally confess, “I mean every word each time I sing it for you.”

“You are? And you do?” Mando seems genuinely surprised, “How- How is that possible?”

You smile at him and because you feel like you might as well go for it, you stand up coming closer to him and then you reach down and take his hands in yours, “It’s possible because you’re such a wonderful man, you treat me with respect, you’re kind, you let me be my annoying, loud self as much as I want--”

“I don’t think you’re annoying,” he interjects.

“And see, that, right there, you always make me feel good, you just make me glad to be around you, it’s one of the many reasons why I fell in love with you, why I am in love with you.” The words come tumbling out of your mouth and your chest feels tight, but then he squeezes your hands.

“I’m in love with you too, have been for a while,” he says softly. Then he tugs you closer to him until you’re sitting in his lap with his arms around you. He holds you close to his chest, and you can’t imagine how this could be any better, until you hear his rich baritone voice sing the last lines of the song to you,

I could make you happy, make your dreams come true

Nothing that I wouldn’t do

Go to the ends of the universe for you

To make you feel my love

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Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it.

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged for any future fics!

Tag list: @sleepwithacommunist @im-the-nerdiest-of-them-a11 @rueblogsthings @mackycat11 @tv-zepeda @remmyswritings @mudhornchronicles @boomtownboy @mandosboobiez @hoodjarin @haley7242

#the mandalorian #the mandalorian fanfiction #the mandalorian x female reader #din djarin #din djarin fanfiction #din djarin x female reader

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thatblondeperson · 5 years ago

Note

So I learnt from that Tim Drake Guy's tumblr that Steph is a bully and abusive with Tim is that true. I ask since I know you seem to agree with a lot of the thoughts expressed on that blog. Can you help me find some examples of Tim/Steph comics. I was going to get YJ but the same tumblr blog says it's bad

So I want to preface with some very solid advice I've learned from being in fandom. It's really hard to learn anything from any blog because so much of it is opinion based, that the line between headcanon and canon gets far too muddied too often, and there's also always going to be biases that come from very personal spaces. It's important to take everything that every blog says ESPECIALLY in the DC fandom, with a very large grain of salt because half the fandom really doesn't actually seem to source their information with anything other than out of context panels, shitposts, or their own perfect ideals of what they want to gleam from the pages of each comic. It's all interpretive, and I'm sure that sounds a little bit petty, but I'm adding myself in here too because I have my own opinions separate from others, despite my firm ideology in staying as close to canon as I possibly can.

As far as that blog, I actually strayed away from them because I no longer agreed with a lot of what was being said. It got to the point where it was getting very unnecessarily negative all the time, and I want no part in this ship war that drives practically every bit of drama in the Tim fandom. I think that there is a lot of merit to some of the opinions on that blog, and they're clearly an expert on Tim in many ways. I knew them personally, so I can attest to that. But I think they also read only what they WANT to read on every page, and I think that makes for a lot of gaps where misinformation can leak in. That got filled with a lot of straight up wrong assessments of Stephanie Brown, and unfortunately that blog was already prime traffic for antis to spew unnecessary hate, so once the blog itself got on board, I tapped out.

No, Stephanie is not an abuser or a bully. I think tumblr throws around the word abuse far too casually. At most, Steph teases Tim, but never to a malicious or purposefully hurtful extent. She pokes at him, just like you would with a best friend. He barely even protests. A simple "Steph..." every now and again, but he even teases her back often and jokes with her. She's not an abuser, in fact, she herself is a victim of severe abuse in her childhood. Her flirting at the beginning of her and Tim's relationship is a bit intense, but she's 15, and doesn't know how to catch his attention. Her boyfriend was clearly way older than her and did not treat her well, her father abused her mother, and she was sexually harassed by her father's friends. She's never seen a healthy relationship to know how to act. Once they get together, she mellows out and is actually very compassionate and kind with Tim, and especially supportive.

A lot of haters throw around all this terrible stuff she did.

They say she stole Robin from Tim. He stepped away from the mantle, and she thought she caught him cheating, and Bruce opened up the opportunity for her.

They highlight a time when she almost blew Tim up. Bruce told her to do something drastic to force Tim to be a better Robin. Should she have thought it through? Yes. But she was young, and still desperate to prove herself.

Steph is a loose canon throughout a lot of her appearances. She doesn't always think before she acts, and that is one of her major flaws. She gets into trouble often, and that causes a lot of tension between her and Tim, often from him becoming overprotective of her.

Steph starts out fairly cynical in the beginning and softens up over time. After the explosion stunt with Tim, she does get her act together and she goes through a fantastic character arc where she really improves upon herself. She becomes a beacon of hope, but she really already was one. She's always been a source of light for Tim. She's a constant tether for him throughout their relationship, and she constantly bringing him back to reality. I think their dynamic is really great, and it does hurt me a lot how often she gets dragged through the mud now. It's tumblr, what can you do?

It's also interesting to me how often Steph is called out for being the unhealthy one, and they never talk about how Tim was the shitty boyfriend way more often:

Kept his identity from her but didn't respect keeping hers private

Kissed her when he was dating someone else at the time (he's actually kinda known for subtle two-timing, but this is hardly brought up by fans)

Essentially stalked her for a while

Often told her she needed to stop being Spoiler (overprotective nature yes...but still)

Interesting how the relationship is only toxic because of Steph. Hell she even gets shit for getting upset that Greta straight up tried to kill her in Young Justice, because they think it was selfish of her that she was desperate to learn Robin's identity. Yeah sorry...murder vs wanting to know your crushes name? Which is worse?

I'm also not going to sit here and demand that everyone love Steph. It's ok that people don't like her, I could give 2 shits, but if they're gonna spew hate, I'd prefer it be rooted in truth. Some of what I see written about her is just so so wrong...there's a trend in anti culture to even write her as Tim's rapist which YIKES. That's so beyond a healthy amount of dislike for a character.

Anyway, comic recs!!!

Detective Comics 647-648. (First appearance of Steph/Spoiler with classic "love at first brick" moment.)

Robin 57-65 (First date issue which is the cutest thing ever. Robin does a little flip at the end because he's so happy. And the chronology of Steph being pregnant which Tim was supportive of the whole time. Super sweet)

Robin 100-104 (Steph gets sick and Tim brings her soup. Lots of cute domestic moments, and you get more into Steph's past)

Robin 111 (more about Steph's past with Tim being super supportive, also the infamous piano issue which is a personal favorite of mine)

Robin 116 (very cute moments after Tim forgets his bday and everyone, Steph included, surprises him)

Robin 119 (supportive bf Tim, strikes again)

Robin 120 (Steph being an amazing supportive gf)

Batgirl 8 (Steph's run, where she and Tim collide again for the first time in a long time. Awkwardness and tension ensues, Tim tries to make a move)

Red Robin 10 (more crossover, very fun. More awkwardness and tension)

Convergence Batgirl (Not the best run, but a nice bit of closure for the pre flashpoint universe. Very sweet and wholesome.)

There's way more that I could list but I'm awful with issue numbers tbh. I know the stories, but I don't have the catalogue memorized. Better people than me have probably made a masterlist of TimSteph comics lol

I don't think you should let any blog turn you away from any particular series. I think if you wanna try out the new YJ, go for it!! I'm very cynical to anything published post 2011, but YJ is the only thing I've consistently read that's NEW, in years. I find it fun. Is it the best? No, not by miles, and it gets stuck with a lot of nonsensical filler often. But it's still a very cute and fun run.

I hope this ask gave you a lot of good info! I also recommend the very long post that should be just below this that goes into a lot of fandom misconceptions about Stephanie brown with more picture examples to highlight everything. Thanks for the ask, anon! I hope you have a lovely time reading these comics and hopefully many more!!

🖤💜❤😊😊😊❤💜🖤

#TimSteph #stephanie brown #tim drake #robin iii #robin iv #spoiler #batgirl #red robin #dc comics #batfamilly #batfam #personal #ask tbp

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some-dr-writings · 5 years ago

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SHSL Barista Shuichi x Reader One-shot: A Very Mysterious Birthday

Shuichi rather groggily awoke up that morning. Though taking a glance at the standing desk calendar atop his bedside table perked him up faster than drinking a latte with several espresso shots in it, like the ones he’d often make for himself every morning. It was his birthday! You, his partner, the SHSL Detective said you’d spend the whole day with him. It was rarer for such a thing to happen. You were rather busy with most everyone constantly requesting your services.

You were so busy, you two even met when you were working. You were looking for an ex-friend of some person who had cut contact with them and wanted to reconnect. You met him at the Hope’s Peak cafeteria as he worked, requesting a drink since you had stayed up the night prior investigating, needing more energy to keep going just a little longer. Shuichi was immediately intrigued by you, he had heard of you and how you were often found collapsed and being sent to the nurse’s office, never resting when you had work to do. At first, he chatted with you to try to stall you, so you’d rest just a little longer but all too quickly the pair of you were deep in conversation of your pasts. Shuichi told you how he kind of worked as a detective, working with his uncle at his detective agency. Of how he’d often go on coffee runs for his uncle and other detectives. He quickly saw how expensive constantly going out for coffee became so he opted to get the proper equipment and started making coffee for everyone at the office. Some of the detectives started bragging about how great his drinks were and soon the office became a detective agency and coffee house hybrid with people dropping by solely to buy Shuichi’s coffee. Shuichi didn’t truly throw himself into being a barista till he solved a case he regretted solving… he didn’t go into detail about that, instead explaining how because of that incident he sort of escaped and gained the courage to look people in the eye again through serving them coffee and making light banter to lift their moods when cases got especially dark. From that day onward you’d go to the cafeteria for a coffee break to get a drink from your favorite barista and eventual boyfriend.

He so excitedly started texting you but got no reply. This was not too surprising. You often left your phone on silent or vibrate when working on a case, and he knew despite how true to your word you tried to be, you always got tangled up in cases, focusing solely on them. He wasn’t surprised if in the night you had gotten a text relating to a new case and started working on it. He was admittedly a little disappointed, but he couldn’t help but smile to himself imagining how you were likely so passionately dashing around or snooping through a book.

Much to his surprise though, when he opened the front door, he saw you there. You were sound asleep, sitting on the ground, leaning against the wall right beside his door. Your head drooped forward, a lollipop stick sticking out of your mouth. Your signature dark, forest green trench coat was draped over yourself like a blanket. “Y/N?” He raised a brow as a lopsided smile drew on his lips seeing you so peacefully there. He kneeled down beside you, gently shaking your shoulder. You slowly awoke, slightly raising your head and blinked a few times. “Hmm? Ah, morning gorgeous.” You chuckled seeing how his cheeks instantly flushed such a bright red. “… You need to wake up. Here-” Helping you to your feet, he led you inside. “Get inside and I’ll make you a drink.”

You sighed, smelling the delectable aroma of coffee brewing, though you were used to the smell since it always lingered in Shuichi’s clothes and on his hair, you never grew tired of or noseblind to the sent. You loved the light thud of the mug against the small wooden table as it was placed before you. The steam that raised up, clouded your vision and tickled your nose was delightful. As you brought the mug to your lips, you spotted the latte art was in the shape of a heart. You were going to say something but stopped, seeing Shuichi was taking a sip from his own drink, clearly trying to mask his blush being that of the heat, not the slight embarrassment and excitement from making that simple design for you. Deciding it was too soon to fluster the poor boy you decided to let it go, instead gently smiling, letting him know the gesture was appreciated.

Propping your elbows on the table, you leaned forward a little getting just a smallest bit closer to your boyfriend who sat across from you. “So, what does the birthday boy want to do today? I know it’s Monday so classes will be on, but we can just skip, it’s not like the school will care or it will effect our grades much.” “Hmm… I haven’t thought much on it actually. I’m just looking forward to being with you today.” “Aw. I’m glad you enjoy my company so much. But I believe we should do something special. Something you like but don’t get to do often, something like that. We could go find some unknown library and snoop through for some obscure novel, you only have so few unread novels left.” “Yeah, that would be nice.” Shuichi looked past you to the wall blocked by tower after tower or cardboard boxes that reached the ceiling, filled to bursting with books. “Honestly, I wouldn’t mind going for a walk in the park, or a lunch date.” “Ah, when I was helping Tanaka search for his lost dog the other day, I heard of this new sushi place that opened up. It’s a little on the expensive side, but from what I gathered it’s well worth the price! Though we’ll have to make sure Hanamura doesn’t find out, you know how he get’s when people go out to eat on school days when he’s in the kitchen.” “Ah, maybe we could ask him to make us something and we have a picnic at the park.” “Great thinking! We can eat after finding a new book!”

“Yeah, but I’d still like to go to class today.” You paused for a moment, taking a sip of your drink. “Really? I know you like studying, but… why not make an exception. We can just ask Kiibo or someone else for notes.” Shuichi glanced over to his bed before getting up and taking the notebooks off of it. “Well. You said you’d be with me all day. I know I take notes for you when your working, but I can’t even remember the last time you even showed up to class. Was it the first day?” Oh, damn it. This was not going as planned. And knowing how altruistic Shuichi was, he was not going to let this go till you went to class for at least half the school day to make sure you were not falling behind on your studies. Shuichi then passed the notebooks to you. “Uh, thanks. But today is your birthday. Let’s celebrate today and I’ll come to class tomorrow.” “… No, I… I’d like to spend my birthday like this. I care about you; I don’t want you to start falling behind. A great gift for me is to just see you’re still doing fine.” How… HOW WERE YOU SUPPOSED TO REFUTE SUCH A KIND SENTIMENT!? “Shuichi… You’re much too kind.” UGH, AND EVEN JUST SEEING HIM SMILING SO TENDERLY WAS MELTING YOUR HEART! HOW DID YOU END UP WITH SUCH AN AMAZING GUY!? But exactly because he was amazing, you had to make his birthday great! “Well, I’ll keep true to my word. If you go to class, I’ll follow you.” “Thank you.”

“After coffee, why don’t we get some breakfast? We have to eat something other than candy you know.” He lightly pointed the treats tucked away in one of the many hidden pockets of your trench coat. “Of course, I know! I only go for the sugar rush when I can’t get any good caffeine.” you said as you took out a box of pocky, munching away on the chocolate covered sticks. Shuichi simply stared at you. “… Sometimes!” “Let’s get an actual meal, Y/N.” “But! Before that… Wanna play a game?” For a moment Shuichi wondered what kind of game you had in mind before noticed how you simply held one end of a pocky stick between your teeth. “O-OH! Uh-umm…” You stood up, playfully ruffling Shuichi’s hair before making your way for the door. You stopped, seeing he wasn’t moving. “How come you’re still sitting there? I thought we were going to get breakfast.” Shuichi quickly followed after you, thinking about how to get you back for always making him blush so much from your light teasing and compliments.

Hand in hand you walked towards the school. The chilly wind picked up the red, orange, and yellow leaves tossing a splash of warm color into the cool, cloudy sky, a tinge of pink dusting both of your cheeks. Though you had been dating for a little over a year now, holding hands still sent your hearts a flutter. Both of you though it was a little silly, but you loved it all the same. As the pair of you were discussing about what to have for breakfast, Kaede came charging towards you two, calling out your name. “Akamatsu, is something wrong?” “Yeah! Someone stole the grand piano from my lab!” “… You… what? The grand piano, was stolen?” “Y/N, please, I need your help finding it.” You glanced to Shuichi sheepishly. “Y/N, it’s fine. Let’s go investigate.” “Really, you sure?” “Yes.”

Just as Akamatsu said, the piano was stolen. The small stage in the middle of the room looked rather empty without it. You kneeled down getting a closer look at the stage. “I don’t see any scuff marks, so it doesn’t appear it was forcefully pushed around at any point.” Shuichi ran a hand along the door frame. “I don’t see anything odd here. Akamatsu, when was the last time you saw your piano?” “Last night, right before the school was closed. I was practicing as usual, then the closing bell rang, and I left for my dorm to sleep for the night.” As Shuichi questioned Kaede you quickly fiddled with your phone, checking if any of your classmates had seen it. Shuichi paced over to your side. “The only time someone could have taken it was last night, after the school was closed.” “Hmm, some are still texting back but it seems no one’s seen it, at least as of yet.” “Hey, normally only staff is allowed after school, right?” “… Yeah, you think of something?” “Students can get into the school if they’re injured, to get to the nurse’s office, so it’s possible someone used that as an excuse to get into the school.” True, true.” “But… why would someone steal a grand piano in the first place?” “True. If we knew the motivation, it could be a clue as to where it could have gone.” “Akamatsu, was there anything special or different about the piano?” She crossed her arms and closed here eyes, thinking for a moment. “It’s not the piano itself but Oma threatened to place a prank in the piano for stopping one of his pranks the other day.” Taking a quick glance around the pair of you realized there were no clues to be found, the only lead you had was that statement.

Holding hands, fingers intertwined the pair of you went searching. Kokichi had yet to text back so you doubted he’d respond if you had asked where he currently was. At best he was only slightly cooperative, so you didn’t expect much. Since it was still the morning, the pair of you decided to see if you could catch him at the cafeteria. “Saihara, my favorite barista! Where have you been all morning?” The chef stopped waving from his open window before smirking, his eyes landing on you. “Oh- Y/N, I see. Don’t mind me, you two have fun now.” “Hanamura! Actually, we’d like to talk with you.” Shuichi eagerly dragged you over to Teruteru who looked a bit more smug than usual. You immediately grew worried he had something planned. “Have you seen Oma this morning?” “Why in fact, I have. He was with Gokuhara speaking about something. Going to a park I think?” That took you by surprise. “A park?” “What was it again?... Oh after breakfast they were planning to go to Showa Memorial Park.” “… You have got to be kidding me. The largest park in Tokyo, one-million six-hundred fifty-three thousand square meters.” Initially you were shocked but thinking on it… “That’s actually smart. Not only is the place massive there are also museums and sports facilities, there’s endless places to hide, likely taking us all day to find him, assuming he even bothers to stay in the park and not leave before we can find him.” “It’s also at the edge of Tokyo, it will take a while to even get there.” The pair of you looked to one another understanding the case would come to a standstill if you didn’t go there to search. “A date at the park sounds like a lovely idea! Wait right here a moment you two.” Before Shuichi would protest, Teruteru already ducked back into the kitchen. Quickly Teruteru was already back with a hand basket full of food in plastic containers. “Now off with you two. Make sure you have lots of fun now! Maybe Y/N will have a surprise for you tonight, Saihara.” You quickly dragged Shuichi away before Teruteru could make more obvious implications.

After a rather short train ride the pair of you were at the park. Even just standing at the entrance of the place one could see just how gorgeous it was. The ginkgo and maple trees were absolutely covered in those fiery leaves as well as the ground. The wind picked up, the sounds of chimes and rustling in the air rang out. The greenery was still lush, making the place look so lively. Shuichi could not believe you were looking at your phone instead of that view. Wait… “Y/N? Why are you on your phone? We’re investigating.” “Oh, I was seeing if I could contact Oma.” You quickly switched off your phone and slipped it into your pocket. “He still hasn’t responded since I asked about the piano. So, now we’ll just have to search this entire giant place.”

And so, the pair of you walked around, taking in the never-ending gorgeous sights. “… Maybe we should come here for a proper date some time. It’s gorgeous.” Shuichi glanced over to you, loving the aw in your eyes. “… It is… but not as gorgeous as you.” “Shuichi, that is the most clichéd line I have ever heard.” You gently shook your head while smiling. “It may be clichéd, but it’s true. To me, at least. I love you.” Your cheeks flushed hearing those worlds. “Sh-shush! We have an investigation to be working on.” “I love you.” He kept saying those words over and over, pulling himself closer to you. He himself was blushing, but seeing you so happily flustered from his tender words made it impossible for him to stop. “T-this is payback for earlier, isn’t it!” “… Maybe.” “Damn it, Shuichi!” “I love you.” You melted hearing how softly he said those words. “Lunch break!” “Huh?” “We need a lunch break!” You quickly dragged Shuichi off the path and onto the grassy area, making sure you were leading the way as to make some distance between the two of you, and to hide your blush. You needed a moment to cool off from Shuichi’s sweet antics. “Tch. It’s no wonder I have a sweet tooth, I have the sweetest boyfriend ever. How could I not develop a taste for the stuff.” Though you were mumbling to yourself Shuichi still caught your words, feeling his heart beat just a bit faster at the sentiment behind them.

The pair of you sat by a lake and a field of bright blue, purple, white, and pink flowers. Teruteru was Shuichi’s friend so he didn’t think the chef would lace the food with anything, but what Teru said lingered in the barista’s mind. He also found how quickly the food was prepared to be suspicious, there was even a small blanket and some utensils in the basket as if Teru had prepared this ahead of time. Perhaps his birthday gift to Shuichi was going to be setting him and you up on a picnic date? “Hey, Shuichi.” “Huh!?” He was suddenly snapped from his thoughts hearing your voice and feeling you lean your head on his shoulder. “Think it’s possible Gokuhara and Oma are out on the lake?” “Oh, there are rental boats over there… I think. It’s a bit hard to see.” “Let’s go check it out after this.” “Sure.” For a while after the pair of you simply lay atop the blanket, watching the clouds roll by occasionally snacking on one of your treats.

“It’s a bit wobbly, but you’ll be fine.” You stood on the boat, your arms outstretched for Shuichi, who nervously inched towards the boat, fearing toppling it over and sending you both into the giant lake. It wasn’t like either of you had a change of clothes. “Don’t worry, just hop on.” He held your hands with a viper like grip as you gently pulled him aboard. “See, we’re fine.” “… Yeah, we are. Sorry, for taking so long.” “It’s okay. Just enjoy yourself now that we’re here.” You both promptly sat down, you taking the oars. You rowed and rowed letting Shuichi take in the breath-taking sights. “Oh, actually I think now would be a good time to give you my gift.” “A birthday gift, for me?” “Don’t look so surprised.” You guiltily shrank in your seat a little, looking off to the side. “I knew it was likely I’d get caught up in some mess and not give you my original gift of staying with you all day, so I got you something to make up for that.” You searched through one of your inner coat pockets, taking out a rather large and thick book. There was no title on the front or back. Everything was blank except for the first few pages. The tops of these pages were labeled ‘Tokyo adventures’ Most of it was writings of others about adventures they had with Shuichi in Tokyo, there were even some pictures. “I know you have in interest in travel, so I thought I’d make you a travel journal. I know most others are probably going to get you something related to novels or coffee and I wanted to get you something more… personal? Something others don’t really know about you. I hope it’s okay.” Shuichi gently ran a hand over the cover before placing it in his lap. Then before you knew it, he was hugging you, burying his face into the crook of your neck. “Thank you, Y/N. I love it.” You leaned your head on his kind of hugging him back without actually doing so, fearing letting go of the oars and said oars sinking into the depths of the lake that lay below, leaving you two stranded out on the lake’s surface never to be found again.

The rest of the day was spent, continuing the search for Oma. You ran through trees, surveyed the lake, searched the museum, watched the flower beds, strolled through the bird sanctuary. The whole time Shuichi clutched that book in his arms, not letting it go for anything. It seemed so sudden when the sun set. You and Shuichi were walking under the cover of trees. “You’re awfully smiley Shuichi.” “Ah, w-well… I did enjoy myself today. I just wish we could have found Akamatsu’s piano.” “It’s entirely possibly she found it while we were out here. I’ll check with her.” You whipped out your phone, quickly blipping about on it. It was then a rather lovely tune began to play. It was one Shuichi recognized. It was a piano piece Kaede had showed him once. A very upbeat and happy song. Though it was an older song, and the names of songs like that tended to be very… “Piano! Y/N, the piano!” “Hmm?” Absorbed by hearing the instrument, Shuichi missed the small smirk that tugged on your lips. “I hear it over there!” Shuichi dragged you along as he raced towards it. Not far in the distance he could see lights flickering on, and a small crowd of people forming near a fountain. As he drew closer and closer, he saw the grand piano and- “Kaede!? Wait- everyone!?” All his friends and classmates were there, Kaede happily tapping away on the keys of the piano. They all screamed variations of ‘happy birthday’ as you and he burst from the wooded path. “I knew something was suspicious! It was clear the piano was not forced from the room so only someone who had knowledge of pianos could dismantle it and take it from the room. And Hanamura having a meal prepared for us! And how you were so relaxed all day despite investigating! You had this all planned!” You looked to the group. “Almost. I had the idea of throwing you a party, but Kaede was supposed to text me when the preparations in the classroom were ready. And I didn’t know Oma was going to lead us here.” As she spoke, Kaede kept playing. “Well, you two so rarely go out on proper dates we thought we’d alter Y/N’s plan a little so you could have just that! A present from all of us, aside from the other presents we got you.”

The evening was spent opening gifts, then sharing food and laughs. Though the party was celebrating him, Shuichi wound up brewing and serving coffee, he found making conversation was much easier when doing so. Unfortunately, there was a mistake and Gonta got decaffeinated beans, so no one was able to stay up all night. Not that it mattered since the park was closing soon.

You ended up falling asleep on the train ride back to Hope’s Peak. Shuichi pulled you close, nervously planting a kiss atop your head before taking out a pencil and writing about his day in his adventure journal. He also wrote of a dream of future adventures, a hope of traveling around the world, helping you solve cases with his detective skills and brewing coffee to keep you going… as your husband.

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thoughtsfromthevoid · 4 years ago

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Things my parents have said and done that terrify me (I have anxiety and depression, ADHD and currently have tics ((Or a Tourettes diagnosis they don't believe in)) from being so anxious all the time)-

-That if I keep coming home late (normally like 5-10ish minutes because traffic) I won't be allowed to go out at all. (I'm not even the one driving, and my friend(s) aren't doing anything to keep me out past that time.)

-"You're only the 357 thousandth teenager to pull the 'I'm down' all the time, its not going to change anything. Drama is drama." (Said because I've been severely depressed lately and not reacting to things like normal.)

-"There was a miscommunication between us (mom and dad) on what you're allowed to do at night." (Had to have me stop for a bit until I got on tic meds, it was very bad. Doctor told us to. I had been doing after school things and been on the meds for 2 weeks at that point)

- "Don't manipulate me into saying yes to things." (Accidentally said friends and I were going through the drive through at wrong restaurant which they wouldn't have said yes to)

-"Don't wake me up if the house is on fire." (Said not to me, but to other parent, out of frustration of being startled awake because they don't sleep well)

-Some more things I won't say on the internet

-Disagreed with my tourettes diagnosis so strongly because they didn't see the tics I referred to happening in the past and since they notice everything, it makes this invalid.

-Also said I don't have tics like others with tourettes and that they don't say random things and is more repeated and that I don't do that when I definitely do, said a wrong definition as well, even after research

-This morning I wasn't apparently allowed to talk when coming into the living room bc it didn't need to be said to them while cooking, not allowed to go in the kitchen at ALL during this time either

-Said every child who doesn't have to do the same amount of chores as me was a spoiled brat or had a ton of siblings when I was struggling with chores and schoolwork for a bit

-Constantly talks negatively about me behind my back to other parent thinking I can't hear when 90% of the time, I can, instead of having a conversation with me about it, its always me being in trouble. Also never sees my improvements and only the failures, it doesn't matter if im working to fix something until it's fixed

-Their autism being used as an excuse constantly as 'it just is this way' and whatever they saying always having to be the truth, even when it isn't. Its not the autism thats the problem, its the constant excuses because of it and toxic mindset and unwillingness to listen. They aren't the only neurodivergant one, I have ADHD. I struggle too. This doesn't seem to matter

-Getting upset when I talk too much and wanting me to be quiet, not wanting to know any of the details when im excited, even when its harmless, the overall frustration of it and wanting me to stop talking so often

-This is normally in effect especially when they are watching stupid (and passable) mindless tv, that I'm constantly triggered by. I constantly have to close my room door to not hear it while doing things like homework, is still always too loud, this is every day after school in the living room, or every weekend. I cant be in that room anymore basically because of it. They get frustrated when asked to pause it quite often, or when I ask for space when doing chores out there, because I hate them looming over me all the time, the TV also makes an unbearable noise for me recently as it is going to die soon of overuse, every time it is on, which stops me from watching basically anything out there or being in the room too long

-Not feeling comfortable enough to practice when parents are home because of looming, coming in while practicing when its not necessary, getting mad when i play things wrong and yelling across the house about it

-my room is my only space, one parent claims entire basement and sometimes I'm not allowed down there at all, even sometimes when I had to sleep down there to feel safe (unrelated issue but still) other parent has living room

-"I dont understand the want/need to go over there." Me asking to go to a friends house after school, everything needed to be done was done, after a really hard day and me feeling trapped in the house. Apparently I need a reason to go and hang out with friends. I do not feel safe going for walks or anything for other known reasons.

-Getting frustrated with my chair placement every concert in orchestra, never proud of me for anything like that either. (Or at least expressed to me) Makes me feel worse and worthless, to the point where I am considering quitting even though I love the instrument, the anxiety and depression now caused by these issues and pressures being put on me over the years is becoming unbearable. Pressure and anxiety lead to me quitting and hating piano after 8 years as well.

I'm really sick of being in trouble for things I can't control, or something I didn't do intentionally. If it was on purpose? Yeah, I get it. If it was something bad? Sure. I never do anything I think is bad, or know I'll get in trouble for. I don't want to be in trouble. I hate it. It makes me feel very afraid. I wish they would trust me more. I know my mental health is bad, but I'm not actively trying to do things wrong, and I do actively try to fix my mistakes. I wish they would really listen when I tell them these things, even be a little more lenient. I wish I was good enough, I really do try. I love my parents so much, they can be so very much amazing, but they can be toxic to me too. Even if the intent isn't there, it still is harmful. It makes me feel mentally unsafe in this household. I don't know whats going to be taken away at any moment. At least I feel that way. I want to move out. I really do.

#2 am thoughts #2 am writing #thoughts #adhd #neurodivergent #depression tw #anxiety tw #actually adhd #vent post #vent #rant #rant post #long post #frustrated #frustration #family tw #tics tw #ask to tag

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tsuki-chibi · 5 years ago

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Passionfruit (Novembr) Day 11: Headphone

Read the whole story on AO3: Passionfruit

————

“I still can’t believe I thought Chloé was Ladybug,” Alya said glumly.

Adrien tried not to visibly wince as he turned around just in time to see the look on Marinette’s face. She didn’t say anything, but her face - and her thoughts - spoke volumes. Alya being akumatized had been interesting, to say the least. In her determination to prove that Chloé was Ladybug, Hawkmoth had reached out to Alya to give her the power to try and figure Ladybug’s identity out. Lady WiFi had come too close for comfort.

“Someone like Chloé could never be Ladybug,” Adrien said, trying to send calming waves towards Marinette.

“Yeah, Ladybug is way too sweet and kind for that,” Nino said.

Marinette flushed, but some of her ire drained away to the point where she playfully nudged Alya in the ribs. “Besides, I think if Chloé were Ladybug, that’s a secret you’re best left keeping quiet about.”

“Right? Especially after that stunt she pulled with Juleka,” Alya huffed.

Adrien frowned at that. Yeah, that hadn’t been Chloé’s best moment. She’d gotten completely caught up in herself and what she wanted... which was pretty par for the course for Chloé, but Adrien was still disappointed in her because she’d been doing pretty good for the past couple of weeks. He hadn’t spoken to her since Juleka had been akumatized; Chloé knew damn well he was waiting for her to apologize to Juleka.

“We have more important things to talk about than Chloé,” Nino declared.

“Like what?” Marinette asked.

“Like my man’s birthday!” Nino said excitedly, hugging Adrien around the shoulders. “And the raging party we’re gonna have!”

“Nino, don’t get carried away. My dad didn’t say yes, and it’s unlikely that he will,” Adrien said. The bell rang and he got up, already thinking about his busy afternoon: he had fencing practice, then piano practice, dinner, and a late photo shoot. He said his good-byes and headed for the door.

“Make sure you ask!” Nino called after him as Adrien left the classroom.

‘Do you think there’s any chance your dad will say yes?’ Marinette thought as Adrien walked to the locker room to change.

‘Nope,’ Adrien thought with a quiet, bitter laugh. ‘I’ve never had a birthday party before. I wish I could’ve seen what Nino had planned... but I know my dad. He’s fundamentally incapable of doing anything fun.’

‘Your father sucks so hard,’ Marinette thought.

‘Tell me about,’ Adrien thought, sighing.

His prediction turned out to be accurate. Adrien was completely exhausted by the time he made it home to the mansion that night. The only bright, shining spot in the whole afternoon had been Marinette’s comforting presence. Tedious photo shoots were always made better when her soothing voice was in his head. Sometimes she’d read to him, or share funny things she found online, or they’d hash out the night’s homework together. She was always a welcome distraction.

He collapsed into bed and fell asleep pretty much immediately. Morning came far too early, and Adrien groaned as his alarm went off and he rolled over to half-heartedly swat at it. He stared at the ceiling for a moment. He could tell that Marinette was still sleeping; her presence was a low hum in the back of his mind, heavy with the kind of contentment that comes from an exhausted teenager finally getting to rest.

“Happy birthday, Adrien!” Plagg exclaimed, suddenly appearing over Adrien’s face.

“Thanks, Plagg,” Adrien said with a tired smile. “I wish I could say it was going to be a good one.”

“I have something that will make it better,” Plagg said.

Adrien eyed him warily. “It’s not cheese, is it?”

“Well, of course cheese makes everything better, but I’ve come to realize you humans don’t appreciate such delicacies the way you should,” Plagg said. “So no. It’s something else!”

He rose up in the air and started waving his paws around. Adrien sat up and watched him in puzzlement, eyebrows furrowed. He was completely unprepared for Plagg to suddenly rear back and hawk something right into Adrien’s lap. The whatever it was landed in a soggy green pool of spit. Adrien stared at it in dumbstruck horror.

“Miraculous birthday,” Plagg declared, looking at Adrien expectantly.

“Uhhhhh....” Adrien said. Years of decorum training prevented him from reacting the way he wanted to, which was a horrified shriek and a vault into the bathroom to shower. He sat there in silence, mouth open uselessly.

Plagg sighed explosively. “It’s a kwagatama,” he said, like Adrien was the one who was being weird. “It’s a symbol of friendship between kwami and their holders.”

“Friendship?” Adrien repeated, softening. The green saliva was magically vanishing, revealing what looked like the black half of a yin and yang symbol. When he gingerly touched it, he realized that it was soft and smooth to the touch. Like a polished stone.

“Making one is a lot of work. You should give me cheese as a thank you,” Plagg said.

“I will. Lots of cheese.” Adrien clasped the kwagatama in his hands and smiled. “Thank you, Plagg. I love it.”

“Whatever,” Plagg muttered, but it didn’t escape Adrien’s notice that Plagg looked incredibly pleased.

He didn’t have any cord, so he sent a text to Marinette and then got up to get dressed while Plagg devoured half a wheel of Camembert. He put the kwagatama in his pocket for now as he left his room, backpack slung over his shoulder. He headed down to an empty dining room to eat breakfast alone, as per usual. Of course, it was too much to ask that his father join him for his birthday breakfast.

Nathalie entered just as he was beginning and said, “Your schedule today.”

“Thanks. Say, did my father get back to you about my party?” Adrien asked, taking the tablet. He read the answer in Nathalie’s face before she even opened her mouth.

“He doesn’t think it would be a good idea,” Nathalie said. “Happy Birthday, Adrien.” She nodded at him and left.

Adrien sighed, hanging his head, and pushed his plate away. Suddenly, he lacked an appetite. He stood and wandered out to the car, where his bodyguard drove him to school. His stomach twisted when he saw that Nino was standing right there at the front gates, waiting for him. The thought of disappointing his friend hurt.

‘Happy birthday, Chaton!’ Marinette thought suddenly.

‘Thanks, My Lady. Just woke up, huh?’ Adrien thought, a small smile coming to his face.

‘Yup. Saw your text. What’s a kwagatama?’ she thought.

Rather than answer, Adrien pushed the memory of what had happened that morning towards her as he got out of the car. Nino rushed over to him, eyes lit up - only for his face to fall when Adrien glumly shook his head.

“Dude, seriously? Your dad sucks,” Nino said, disappointed.

“Tell me about it,” Adrien said, slamming the car door. They walked through the gates together.

“Can’t you like... insist?” Nino suggested. “Tell him he needs to be fair?”

Adrien scoffed. “Honestly, I’m not sure my dad even knows what fair means,” he replied.

‘Oh my god,’ Marinette thought at the same time. She was laughing. ‘Oh, Adrien. That’s disgusting.’

‘It was so gross,’ Adrien thought back.

“At least you can smile, I guess,” Nino said, looking at Adrien.

“Uh, sure,” Adrien said. He was smiling because of Marinette, but of course Nino didn’t know that.

Nino sighed and took a bottle of bubble solution out of his back. Adrien watched curiously as he twisted off the top and started blowing bubbles. He’d seen people blow bubbles before, of course, but it was never something he’d had the chance to do himself. Nino was so good at it, creating a perfect bubble with every try.

“What?” Nino asked, eventually noticing the attention.

“Could I try?” Adrien asked.

“Sure,” Nino said, surrendering the wand.

“Like this?” Adrien pursed his lips and blew, splattering the bubble solution all over the place. Nino laughed.

“Gently, Dude. Not so hard,” he said.

Adrien obeyed and beamed as a bubble formed on the end of the wand, slowly breaking off. He watched it float through the air until it finally landed on the ground and burst. But that was okay, because he could just blow another one. He did so, dipping the wand back in the solution and then carefully blowing several more.

“So what’s up with you and Alya?” he asked finally.

Nino reddened. “No clue what you mean.”

“Well, you’re soulmates,” Adrien said. “So...” He already knew from Marinette that Nino and Alya were keeping their bond firmly closed for the time being. He couldn’t imagine what that would be like. Having Marinette as a part of him was the best thing thing that had ever happened to Adrien.

‘You sweetheart,’ Marinette thought fondly.

“I dunno. It’s... weird,” Nino said, not quite looking at Adrien. “I don’t even know her.”

“Maybe you should try spending time with her. Alya’s pretty cool,” Adrien said.

Nino frowned. “Since when do you know Alya?”

“Just what Marinette’s told me,” Adrien said quickly. He knew Alya because Marinette knew Alya, and Adrien knew what Marinette did - but of course, he couldn’t tell Nino that.

“Maybe,” Nino muttered, shrugging and toying with his headphones. “She hasn’t exactly acted like she wants to spend time with me, so...”

‘Alya says the same thing about Nino,’ Marinette thought.

“I bet Alya feels the same way,” Adrien said.

Nino just shrugged again, and Adrien took the hint. Luckily, he had the perfect distraction. Marinette ran through the gates at that moment. He handed the bubble solution and wand back to Nino and hurried over to meet her. She threw her arms around him in an exuberant hug.

“Happy birthday, Adrien!” she cried.

“Thanks,” Adrien said.

“Here.” Marinette untangled herself and reached into her bag, producing a box. “This is for you.”

Adrien’s eyes widened. “You got me a present?!”

She grinned. “Of course!”

‘I’ve been working on it at night while you were asleep,’ she added mentally, her eyes twinkling. ‘And it’s been taking sooooo much effort not to think about it when you were awake.’

“Marinette...” Adrien was so touched he could barely speak.

“Open it,” she said, laying a hand on his arm.

He obeyed, pulling the wrapping off and opening the box. His eyes widened when he saw the handmade, knitted blue scarf carefully arranged inside. It was made of a material so soft that Adrien immediately wanted to buy several bolts of it just so that he could curl up and sleep on it. Marinette giggled at that and picked the scarf up, gently draping it around his neck.

‘Happy birthday, mon minou,’ she thought, and kissed his cheek.

So overwhelmed that he couldn’t speak, much less form thoughts, all Adrien could do was pull her into another hug. He gathered all of his feelings and pushed them at her, gratitude, affection, shock and bittersweet pain all wrapped into one. Marinette instantly wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him as tightly as she could.

#passionfruit #adrien agreste #marinette dupain-cheng #nino lahiffe #soulmates #gabriel agreste's a+ parenting #the bubbler #passionfruit november #miraculous Ladybug

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fromcrossroadstoking · 5 years ago

Text

Winters and the Problem of Quiet Days

Part 5 of Welcome to the 5061st. Part 5! That means we`re halfway through guys!

Tags: @gottapenny @itisjustmethistime @indigosandviolets @scarecrowmax

-----------------------------

July 22nd, 1400

If there`s one truth that every head of a MASH unit knows it`s this; a bored MASH unit is a dangerous MASH unit.

MASH units are like powder kegs. Steeped in trauma, disease, and death day in and day out. Surrounded by war. An ocean away from home. Under constant pressure to save the lives of begging, pleading, scared soldiers. The tension was bound to boil over. Especially when almost everyone was a draftee.

It had been a lesson that Colonel Dick Winters had learned the hard way.

Tension, fear, loneliness - it could be pushed to the side when there was work to be done. But on those quiet days? The days when the wounded weren't flooding in? All those terrible thoughts and emotions were front and center.

When Winters had first taken over the 5061st, he hadn't given the quiet days any thought. But it soon became obvious that quiet days meant drinking. And fighting. Fooling around. Excessive gambling. Rioting.

Oh yes, and he would never forget when they started a bonfire. Using all the furniture that wasn't nailed down.

Or when Sisk tried to jump from the roof using sheets as a parachute, nearly breaking his leg in the process.

Or when Liebgott and Grant took an ambulance for a joy ride and drove it straight in to a ditch.

Then there was the time someone (or several someones) dyed everyone`s clothes pink.

Of course, there was also the incident where everyone`s shoes were mysteriously filled with applesauce.

And then there were the boxing matches which resulted in far more injuries than he cared for.

There were a couple hundred other examples of what happens when the 5061st gets bored and Winters had made ti his mission to keep that number from getting much larger. He entertained them the best he could.

First it was the Officer`s Club he had built on base, which ended up being less of an Officer`s Club and more of an Everyone`s Club. And then there the movie nights. Unfortunately, it tended to be the same movie over and over and over again. Organized baseball games and races were popular for awhile. Picnics and homemade carnival games provided a nice distraction for a bit. Calisthenics were deeply unpopular (again, they were mostly draftees). He had even let them adopt a mascot - a goat named Radar, so named because he seemed to know before everyone else that choppers were coming and would start bleating frantically. And while Radar was universally adored by everyone, it appeared it was time for something new again.

Winters had already broken up three fights, had MPs escort four drunken individuals back to base from the local bar, mediated six arguments, and treated two medics who were injured when their homemade still exploded.

The 5061st was getting bored.

July 22nd, 1405

Trying to find something new to entertain the 5061st was not an easy task. After all, they were in the middle of Korea and there was a war going on.

Winters sat at his desk, leaning his head in one hand, while rhythmically tapping the pile of papers in front of him with his pencil.

He had nothing.

"Luz!"

The clerk appeared immediately from the front room, "Yes, sir?"

"Get me Nixon on the line."

"You got it sir!"

July 22nd, 1408

"I could let them get another pet."

"Dick, they've already got a goat. Plus you've let Luz keep how many animals now?"

"Just a bunny. And a turtle. And a hamster."

"You're going to be running a petting zoo, not a hospital, soon."

Winters sighed, "Yeah, well, I don`t know what else to do. They're starting to get nuts again. Heffron got his hand stuck in a jar trying to see how small of a jar he could fit it in to. People were placing bets."

"You're shitting me!" Nixon`s sudden bark of laughter filled the line, "Who won the bet?"

"Nix... "

"Alright, alright. You need something new, huh? Hmmm... "

There was silence for a moment as the two men tried to come up with something.

"Dick! I've got it! Have a variety show!"

"A variety show?"

"Yeah, you know, let everyone sign up and show off a talent of theirs. They'll be too busy practicing for the big night to go around getting their hands stuck in jars."

And that was how the first ever 5061st variety show came to be.

July 29th, 1200

Winters had to give it to Nixon, the variety show was a fantastic idea. The entire MASH was abuzz with excitement for it and many of them had signed up for the show right away. Even Father Powers signed up - apparently he was quite talented with the harmonica.

The show was only a few days away now and Winters could only silently pray that it would be a success.

August 1st, 1900

A small stage had been constructed out of scrap wood and crates. A banner reading "1st Annual 5061st Variety Show" had been hung. Chairs were arranged, snacks laid out, and people were taking their seats. Winters cleared his throat and made a quick welcome before handing over the show`s reigns to the emcee for the night, Babe Heffron.

Babe made a surprisingly good emcee. He kept everything moving, told a few jokes of his own, and kept the energy high between acts. The acts themselves were... interesting. Some were very good and some, well, not so much.

Spina could not sing for the life of him but, oh, did he try.

Father Powers' harmonica skills were actually quite impressive.

Luz`s impersonations were, as usual, spot on. Although some of his jokes might have crossed a line or two (thankfully no higher ups were in attendance).

Talbert played a few songs on his guitar while everyone sang along.

Speirs performed a few magic tricks (Winters would have never in a million years guessed Speirs was an amateur magician).

Grant played the piano beautifully (another surprise).

Christenson made up some hilarious, yet very dirty, poetry.

All in all, there were about thirty acts and the night went even better than Winters could have ever hoped for. The entire 5061st seemed energized by the bit of fun and the mood of the whole camp felt lifted. Of course, Winters knew it wouldn't last. Walking back to his tent that night, the wheels in his head were already turning, trying to think of what to do next.

Maybe a basketball tournament.Or maybe I could find a way to get a pool. Or an obstacle course.

Letting out a yawn, he laid down on his bed and figured it was a problem he could solve in the morning. After all, they couldn't get bored that quickly.

Could they?

#band of brothers #Welcome to the 5061st #band of brothers fanfiction #dick winters #band of brothers fanfic #i wrote a thing

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angrylizardjacket · 5 years ago

Text

take me to your heart

Summary: Lola's never had a proper Christmas, and after this one, she still hasn't, but Tommy's a surprisingly good gift giver. Set during the tour with Roxie, but well after she's departed.

A/N: Written on my phone, v Christmas. Warning: Lola n Nikki give each other dirty gifts but the fic is sfw. Tommy-centric. Also idk if he's genuinely greek orthodox, he might not be idk

[run to paradise]

----

"Sharise wants to do something for Christmas," Vince sighs, his heels resting on the table of the tour bus. Lola, at least, looks up from her magazine with a frown, though she seems to be the only one paying attention.

"She's in LA."

"We'll be in Phoenix by then, its not that long of a flight," Vince answers quickly, and Lola goes back to her magazine. "I don't know what to get her."

"A six-pack and edible panties," comes Nikki's answer, half distracted where he was trying to write lyrics. Vince's expression, however, wrinkles.

"Have you ever bought a present for a lady who wasn't Lola?" He snaps, crossing his arms, and though he can't see Lola's amused expression, he hears her snort of laughter.

"Yes," Nikki responds flatly, finally looking up, "but incase you haven't noticed," he gestured around to the bus, which was filled only with the band, as well as Doc and Lola, "none of them are still here."

"That's correlation, man, not causation -"

"You know what? Fuck your five dollar words, man, I was trying to help." Nikki snapped, picking up his notebook in a huff and heading to the back of the bus. Silence fills the air, Vince sulking a little, Tommy just looking between Lola and Vince. Mick, who was trying to nap, sighs deeply and shifts in his uncomfortable seat.

"Is that all you've ever gotten for Christmas?" Tommy asks and Lola's response is surprisingly honest.

"Zero expectationsl, zero disappointments; drink, eat, fuck, like any other day." She does give pause there, the magazine rustling as her grip tightens just a little, and when she lowers it, there's amusement in her eyes. "Also, grape is the best flavour."

"What?"

"For edible panties."

"You guys are absolutely no help." Vince declares. Mick just laughs at that.

Lola's never been too bothered by not having a proper Christmas, she and Nikki live a pretty secular life when they weren't dabbling in Satanism, and the others were usually too busy doing their own things around the holidays to notice the pair's lack of any sort of traditions. Usually they'll buy each other booze, or some sort of joke present, but its never been a particularly sentimental time for Lola, not that anyone had really noticed her apathy enough to care.

Until now.

The holidays have always been a sentimental time for Tommy, and though he'd strayed from his Greek Orthodox roots, he still took it as a chance to show his family how much they meant to him, and now he was feeling like a fool for leaving his band-family out for so long.

What the hell could he get them that they didn't already have?

Nikki was easy, as it turned out. One quick phonecall home, his father spends about twenty minutes rifling through the junk Tommy had left from hia teenage years, and a poster, heavily creased and golden with age, is waiting at their next hotel, express shipped. Nikki didn't want or need any fancy packaging, so Tommy bought a big, yellow envelope and put the poster inside, along with a lighter he'd bought at a gas station. It looked cheap, a bit rough around the edges, but he was pretty sure Nikki would appreciate it all the same.

Mick was a little more difficult, seeing as he was almost guaranteed to throw out any joke gifts, or amything he didn't want. It feels like a cop-out, to just give him booze - expensive booze, mind you - instead of something sentimental. As luck would have it, Tommy finds himself scoring blow in an alley beside a pawn shop, and once the deal's done, he spots an iridescent alien-head keychain. He tapes the charm to the bottle of booze, amd slaps a bow on it, and is satisfied.

He and Vince have been exchanging Christmas presents since high school, as long as they were in the same town. Mostly they're joke presents. Tommy's had this year's picked out for months; a Malibu Barbie he'd repainted himself with Vince's stage make-up. Vince he didn't need to worry about.

Lola was a different story. She lived her life in the shadow of the band's, her existence, her belongings, were a patchwork of their leftovers; her creature comforts were consumables, and while she always took whatever she could wherever she was, it was because she could, not because she wanted things. What can you get for the girl who seems to want nothing, and still gets everything?

"Lola doesn't want things, she wants experiences, opportunities," Vince is the one who Tommy finally goes to for advice, and was the only one who Tommy knew would be actually helpful. They're in Vince's dressing room now, Tommy polishing off a bottle of Jack while Vince touches up his own eyeliner. Tommy's frowning, still at a loss, and he lowers the bottle. Their eyes meet in the reflection of the mirror, and Vince visibly hesitates before speaking again.

"Have you ever heard her play piano?"

Christmas rolls around and they're stuck in a hotel in Arizona. They're finishing the tour in LA just days before New Years Eve; the end is so close they can all almost taste it.

Sharise invites them all to dinner, well, she invites Lola when she learns that Lola's never had a proper Christmas dinner and 'the rest of them can come too if they want'. Tommy feels like Santa, laden with gifts, as he gets to the private room they had booked at the nicest resturant in town that was still open. He'd spent the morning organising Lola's gift, and was glad to have a break to eat before he gave it to her, or more accurately, took her to it.

"We were meant to bring presents?" Lola looks immediately panicked when he steps inside with a rather full backpack. She starts patting down her pockets as if hoping to magically find a pile of gifts there. "I didn't- I mean like I didn't bring them- its just drinks- nice drinks -" she clarified, but Tommy grins brightly.

"It's chill, Lols, I just saw this stuff around and thought it would be nice, its not a big deal," with that he laughed a little self consciously, "and dude, I'm sorry but I don't even have a thing to give you."

Lola can't help but be a little put out by that, still strangely childish in ways that continue to baffle Tommy, but he hopes she'll appreciate his gift, even if he can't give it to her with the others.

They do exhange gifts; Tommy gives Sharise champagne, and she seems more amused by his gift to Vince than Vince is. Vince, for his part, gives Tommy an ornate fountain pen, which has Tommy confused at first, while Nikki roars with laughter, pulling out an incredibly cheap ballpoint with a bow on it.

"You guys are fucking assholes," Tommy scowls once he realises, though by now even Lola's snickering. The scar from where Roxie had stabbed him several months ago begins to ache, just a little.

Mick, like Lola, doesn't have any gifts either, but he passes her a lighter and gruffly tells her he found it on the bus, that it was her's and that this isn't a gift. He does, however, smile at the keychain Tommy gives him, and in a few days, Tommy will see it looped around the handle of one of his guitar cases.

To no ones surprise, Nikki puts a six-pack and a pair of cheap, grape flavoured, edible panties on the table, and slides it gracelessly across the table to Lola wearing a shiteating grin. Mirroring his smile, Lola reaches into the inner pocket of her jacket, and flicks him a little cardboard package. Its unmarked, nondescript, and absolutely no-one at that table trusted Lola to have put something appropriate in that box. Everyone waits with a sort of morbid curiosity as Nikki shakes the box, giving pause before opening it.

"It vibrates." Is all Lola says as he holds up the bright purple cockring, smile on his face giving away how genuinely amused he was with it.

"Presents are cancelled," Sharise declared with faux exasperation, but Tommy's already protesting, holding out his own gift to Nikki.

Sharise hands Lola a small present as Nikki unwraps his. For Lola, its new black lipstick and eyeliner, and for Nikki, its an old poster of his band, London, and a cheap lighter. Nikki's expression is unreadable, blinking slowly at the poster, the room's gone quiet enough that everyone can hear it crinkle in his hands as he looks up at Tommy's smile.

"It's the one I used to have on my wall, man; my folks kept all my old posters, I thought you might wanna burn the shit out of this one." He gestures to the lighter, nervousness bubbling in his stomach, unsure of how Nikki feels about it, his face still a little shocked.

Little by little, Nikki's lips turn to a smile, a bright, beaming, genuine grin. He practically launches himself across Mick to wrap Tommy in a hug, fierce and bright. Mick grumbles, but Nikki just crows about how weirdly cool it was.

"Yeah, i figured arson and petty revenge are like, two of your favourite things," Tommy babbles, hugging Nikki back, quietly pleased with himself. Its a strangely endearing moment, and when Tommy looks over at her, he catches Lola's adoring smile as she watches them, but its gone quickly.

Dinner is fun, between the bottles of rum they finish off between them and the lines of coke they have for dessert, which Sharise mostly abstains from, they don't really get out of line. Except for when Nikki sets the poster on fire with the candle in the middle of the table, and he ends up getting kicked out.

Whatever, he was mostly done anyways.

After dinner they all go their separate ways, but Tommy catches Lola before she gets too far. She's tipsy, grinning in the cold night air, happy to let Tommy lead her where he may. Lacing her finger with his, her free hand swings the six-pack Nikki had gotten her, while she hums a tune Tommy recognises but can't place.

They come to a stop outside of the Hall where the band were due to perform the following night, their equipment bus parked and quiet beside the building.

"Nothing's in there yet; we're bumping in tomorrow morning," Lola says, her hamd still in his. Tommy just grins, pulling a set of keys from his pocket, jangling them enticingly.

"So we've got the whole night."

Inside, in the middle of the stage, lit by a single warm, golden spotlight, sits a grand piano. The whole building is empty, save for the two of them, and Lola's grip on his hand tightens. All words leave her, eyes going wide and surprised.

Walking forward, she heads towards the piano, but she doesn't let go of his hand, gently tugging him along with her. His name leaves her lips, a disbelieving, reverential utterance. The lid is already lifted and she carresses the keys with her free hand.

"You didn't have to-" she turns to him, expression awed, but he gives her hand a squeeze.

"Merry Christmas, Lols."

Stepping up to him, her hand is gentle on his cheek, far more gentle, more tender than he was used to her being. Leaning in, they kiss softly, in sync, fitting together as they always had, as they were always meant to. Pulling away, Tommy's grin is fond as he kisses the tip of her nose. Untangling their fingers, he gestures wordlessly to the piano.

Lola sits, hesitates, listening to Tommy's retreating footsteps.

"Where are you going?" She asks quietly, fingers dancing across the keys as she plays a quick scale.

"Vince told me-"

"That snitch." Lola laughs softly, before adding, "'told you I don't like an audience, didn't he?" Tommy agrees, still paused halfway to the door. Lola is quiet for a moment, and she stops in her movements, but then she starts up again, and Tommy's heart is in his throat as he hears thw opwning bars of the song he'd been working on for almost a month amd a half now. The song's not yet finished, but he'd know the opening to Home Sweet Home anywhere.

"Can you stay?" Lola's voice is barely audible above the music. "If you want to, I'd like you to stay." And she doesn't know the lyrics, so she keeps playing what she's heard him play a hundred times over.

"I didn't know you knew this that well," Tommy finds himself smiling, walking back to the piano, to sit down beside Lola where she's shifted over to make room for him. She's smiling too, genuine, actually a little bashful, and she's still playing when she admits her thoughts.

"It's shaping up to be one of my favourites."

#tommy lee #nikki sixx #tommy lee x oc #tommy lee imagine #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx imagine #vince neil #mick mars #motley crue imagine #motley crue #mgk #machine gun kelly #daniel webber #douglas booth #iwan rheon #the dirt #the angry lizard writes

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moonstruck-ffxiv-blog · 6 years ago

Photo

(That pic has nothing to do with anything, it’s me that tried to make my irl cat as a miqo’te)

Moonstruck: I Like RP Partners to Know

I like to be called: Mael

My favorite colors are: I’m very fond of pastels, especially pink.

Gender: I’m confused about that.

One thing you should know about me (or several): I started RPing at 12-13 years old on those BBC-type of forums. At first, I was on other’s people, then I created my own. My high school friends, to this day, still remember my primary character I had for years: Chaos, a chthonic devil-god with two dicks and two vaginas, that fucked himself, to create the demonic race. In those years, I was OBSESSED with the idea of evil and was trying to find a solution or explanation to it. It was through my writing I considered what it was - mostly with that OC, which was the most repulsive character I could ever create. A funloving, whimsy, joker-type outside, but a beast of every sin inside. There was no filter when I was RPing him. He was cartoonishly evil, which was the point. I think.

Thank Sobek King of the Nile I outgrew my edgelord teenage years lmao.

I work a lot of myself, ameliorate skills, learning,... I don’t have much time for hobbies anymore. Because of that RP, as much as I like it, is taking a backseat and I have to pick my partners pretty carefully.

I don’t like public RP events, they are all organized the same way, I find lazy and boring. If I had to choose between a public event or the Quicksand, I will pick the latter. In both cases I will stand around touching my dick for 3 hours but at least at the Titsand can hook up with someone and write ERP. That alone makes it not a complete waste of my time.

I play piano and try to get back into dawing. I practice every day and I’m starting to see the result which makes me pretty happy.

My favorite food is Frank’s Red Hot Chicken Wings Sauce.

I’m currently working on a book and trying to be a professional writer. Wish me luck!

PS: If you make me tea I will be your friend forever.

One thing you should know about my muse(s)(Or several): I do have 15 OCs on FFXIV and I don’t feel going through the whole list. I’m lazy, please forgiving me. I’ll probably go through my “Big Fives” as I call them in my inner monologue.

Louis: Louis is an extension of my alienation and loneliness. How he feels about being different and not belonging to anywhere is how I feel myself lot of the time. I have troubling connecting and understand people and so does he.

He’s a Nightkin and even if I initially present him as being “awkward and cute” don’t be mistaken. He is a killer and he is dangerous. He will exploit a weakness when he sees one. Yes, he will feel remorse about it but that won’t stop him for doing it.

Celestin: Hey do you know what happens when you shove one of those rockets you buy from the convenient store and you shove it into my ass? That character happens. His my own pride, exaggerated to the 9th degree; he’s my salt and my anger. He’s the asshole I become when I get hurt.

Celestin is a very proud man (one could say he has some kind of god complex - which is not completely false) willing to go to unimaginable heights for his goals. He’s Machiavellian: the ends justify the means. It’s all a matter if the sacrifices he does is worth it…

Ezrien: He started as a joke character which I assume. He still got a LOT to do but bit by bit, I’m building him. I would really want to explore more his drug and alcohol addiction, to get GRITTY instead of always be joking with him. Still waiting for the good person to unpack this box of worms.

I really enjoy Ez, and I enjoy him more since I made him and Rochel cousin. They are excellent foils to each other and bring me a lot of joy.

Narcisse: My sad elf prince (tm) and my attempt to try to make a “Lawful Good” type of character. He’s a knight, living to serve other people and get rid of evil on this world. He has a very black/white worldview (which is his weakness) and he’s… well, he’s kinda of intolerant sometimes.

I still have to figure him a lot but I really love his aesthetic. I feel he’s missing, I don’t know what, and that spark of oompf is what holding me back to really enjoy him.

Ephraim: My baby. Oh, do I love Eph hahahaha. When I created him I was “okay dude, stop doing fucking egdelords all the time. No dark, break the mold.” And I succeeded! He’s the softest, gentlest necromancer I ever made -and at the same time, breaking the trope of the ever-so-dark necromancer.- I really like how I can switch my gear with him, he’s an extremely versatile character. Yeah, his backstory is sad and I can still make dark stuff with him but I can do comedy and absurd plots. Which I absolutely adore. When I RP with Cecilia and Ruruka, things get so dumb so fast. I love it.

First language: French. I’m foreign and I tend to use sentences that work in French but doesn’t in English. I do think the way I structure my writing work in my main language but sometimes is lost in translation. When I’m tired I tend to revert back more often to French which can be hilarious… or horrible.

RP blogs/Main Blog I only have this blog so uh that’s it folk

Age range: under 13 | 14–17 | 18–22 | 23–25 | 26–29 | 30+ | 70+

Am I okay with NSFW?: yes | no | some nsfw

I’m not particularly “shopping” for porn; I do have more sexually inclined characters than others (Ezrien, Narcisse.) I don’t mind ERP neither I mind people that do it (either regularly or casually). However, I do find it pretty pointless most of the time. What I mean by that is, the consequences of characters having sex will be the same whether you describe or not every moan and cum shot. IN ANY CASE, I’ll be honest, I did write a loooooot of smut in the past. While I don’t really do it anymore (I barely RP at all lmao), I’m not 100% closed to the idea to dip my toes back into it. It’s all a matter of what’s my mood today, what kind of char you got and who you are.

Yeah dude I added some of my own because I find there wasn’t enough

OC friendly?: yes | no | depends

RP blog: does contain ooc posts | doesn’t contain ooc posts | occasionally contains ooc | Aesthetic

tagged by @ssytxiv

tagging @corbelleterrechant @nerd-ology @lovelyflyingfiend @lichface @avwalya @lulu-ffxiv @housefortempsknight @garlean-nonsense @vashzeibel

#I Like RP Partners to Know #ooc

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alittletournesol · 6 years ago

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Sing Your Soul {JongKey} part 3/?

(Happy birthday Laura ♡)

Part 3

Minho was a difficult guy when it came to allow new artists in his bar, however he also was the demanding kind regarding his selection criterions. If one received a proposal for a performance at the Blue Night, for sure it meant talent was there ; for a long time, people who were aware of his relationship with Jinki had thought the bartender was blindly favouring the singer. Since the latter could easily have his show once every two weeks, it wasn’t wrong of them to think that way, but the thing was…

“It’s not my fault if he can sing so well.” The tall man grumbled, changing gear with one hand holding the wheel. “The audience likes him anyway.”

“I’m not saying you’re doing him too many favours.” Kibum retorted on the passenger seat, lowering the sound of the radio to be heard. “I just think that dude from the States should have more performances at the bar. He’s quite good, I like his voice.”

“You mean Eric ? He’s having a few auditions lately, he wants to try getting accepted in an agency. I guess if he succeeds, he won’t have time anymore for the Blue Night.”

“That means you’ll have plenty of evenings for my target !”

“Come on, you shouldn’t wish for one’s dismissal. The station is near, let’s see if we can park somewhere…”

As the events planner had expected it, his best friend had had to admit the few videos of the subway singer were showing a talented guy. However, he had decided he needed to see a performance with his own eyes to really make his own opinion ; no sooner said than done, Kibum had quite forced him to pick him up at his place so they could go together to the station where the stranger sang. It took them a few minutes to find a spot to park the bartender’s car, everything being almost taken on a Sunday.

In the end, they would have to walk a bit to reach their destination but they didn’t mind considering what kind of prize was waiting for them at the end of the path. The oldest of the two was heading to the station hastily, his heartbeat growing faster as he approached the subway’s outdoors staircase. He completely ignored Minho calling to tell him to go slower, that they weren’t in a rush and he would eventually hurt himself by falling in the stairs or something like that.

“Are you even sure he will welcome us warmly ?” The tallest of them asked as he bought a quite useless ticket, which would only serve to allow him on the platform. “From what you said, he rejected you last time.”

“Just because he didn’t believe me.” Kibum replied, his voice tinted with hope. “But if you, the bar’s owner, is here with me, he won’t be able to accuse me of being a liar again.”

“Aren’t we a bit rude here ? I mean, the guy had enough of scammers and told you off because you were too straightforward, and now we’re literally hunting him.”

“You’re so making a fuss over nothing… we’re going to politely meet him, not assault and kidnap him or whatever.”

“Still, I think we could have done it differently. Anyway, I guess you’re the boss so just don’t whine at me if he punches you.”

Rolling his eyes, the event planner pressed his friend to buy his ticket faster, the other one retorting he couldn’t wait faster for it to be printed. Once the machine finally gave him his due, Minho had just the time to catch it before he was grabbed by his arm and pulled towards the gates. He refrained himself from snapping at Kibum, knowing that as soon as the latter had something in mind, it was better for him to not put a spoke in his wheel. And after all, this situation could also be beneficial for him…

When they eventually made it to the platform, it was obviously almost empty : not a lot of persons had to take the subway on a Sunday, even the trains themselves didn’t come and go as frequently as on a weekday. The display was announcing the next one in a bit less than ten minutes instead of the usual two to three minutes of spare time. But what was more surprising for both men was the fact that they could have thought about it earlier : why would an artist sing in an empty subway ?

The singer wasn’t there.

Kibum frowned and approached the corner where the guy habitually took his place, with his guitar’s case and his foldable stool. But the floor was clean as a whistle, nothing to hint that there might have been someone standing here in the past few hours. Had they come too early ? Or too late ?

“Well, I guess you scared him away.” Minho laughed. “Looks like he found another station.”

“That’s not possible…” The event planner muttered to himself before he took his phone, trying to look for a potential video that could have been posted earlier that day. “There is no trace of him.”

“Let’s just go home and come back on another day. The bar is closed on Tuesday, what do you think ?”

“No, I’m working until too late. Excuse me ?”

The bartender cocked an eyebrow as he watched his best friend being so desperate that he was asking random people about the subway singer. He somehow felt bad for him, it wasn’t in his habits to care so much about someone, to the point he looked really affected by the aforesaid person’s absence. He didn’t even know that guy, he might be a crush on him but was all of this truly necessary ?

“Kibum, you’re making a spectacle of yourself.” He stepped in when the other man asked a fourth person. “Just forget it.”

“Why does it have to be me every single time ?” The brown haired man sighed. “Can’t I have an ounce of luck in my life ?”

“You’re overdoing. Let’s just come back on another day and you’ll see your singer.”

“Are you looking for Jonghyun ?”

Both men turned towards the voice that had just spoken and were surprised to see a little girl holding her mother’s hand, the adult frowning at her child’s sudden behaviour. She was barely six years old, yet she seemed to know exactly what she was talking about. Before Kibum’s lack of tact could scare her, Minho smiled and crouched to be at her level.

“Hello, sweetie.” He softly said, kindly dismissing her mother’s apologies. “It’s fine. You said something about us looking for someone ?”

“Yes, Jonghyun.” The girl nodded. “The man with white hair who sings here sometimes, his name is Jonghyun. You’re looking for him, right ?”

“I think you’re right, do you know why he’s not here today ?”

“No, but I think he sings really well ! He sang the song of Queen Elsa for me once.”

The events planner couldn’t help but sigh with disappointment, earning a glare from his friend who thanked the little girl anyway and stood up.

“He sings here on weekdays only.” The mother suddenly said, stroking her daughter’s hair. “He still needs an audience so he opts for main lines stations on Sundays.”

“Oh, really ?” The bartender smiled. “Thank you, madam, I think you just made my friend’s day.”

“It’s nothing, I can see he’s a bit disappointed. Try going to Yongsan, last time I returned from a business trip on a Sunday, he was singing there.”

“Thank you a lot, have a good day. You too, princess.”

The little girl giggled at the nickname and both men watched her leave with her mom to wait for the subway. Minho waved at her before he turned towards his friend, crossing his arms on his chest and shaking his head.

“You really need to take lessons to improve your communicating skills.” He commented. “You’re an events planner and that’s how you accost people ?”

“It’s easier on the phone, I don’t see their faces.” Kibum shrugged. “I guess we’re off to Yongsan then !”

“You are. I can drop you off there but it takes half an hour and I have an appointment.”

“You’re abandoning me ? An appointment, my ass. Just say you got a date with your boyfriend in some cheesy cafe where you’ll eat a same ice cream sundae together.”

“You know, you won’t be able to find yourself a boyfriend if you keep acting like that. Who do you share your sundaes with ?”

“I don’t share my food. Don’t avoid the topic.”

“You’re the one avoiding it but well. Yeah, I have a date with Jinki, happy ? I’m proposing to drop you off but you can also take the subway.”

“Come on, you can’t do that to me… Ming…”

“Practice your puppy eyes, it still doesn’t work on me. Just come, stupid, I’ll give you the bar’s business card so he will believe you. Bring him there one night and he’ll see.”

With these words, the bartender didn’t hide a smile as he turned around and walked away, immediately followed by his friend who curiously stopped whining.

Yongsan station was more crowded than Kibum would have expected, he who always tried to plan his travels on rather quiet days like Tuesdays or Thursdays. The young man was playing with the business card he had in his hands, as he made his way between people and their luggages. It might sound stupid but now that he hadn’t Minho to have his back, he felt a bit less confident to do the talking with the singer — Jonghyun, if he remembered the name correctly.

He had been so tactless on the last time, and he really didn’t know how to make up for it. Was handing the card like this actually a good idea ? Or was it just as straightforward as his first attempt… His best friend’s words resounded in his mind, about the he hunt and his communicating skills. The bastard was right. He could become rude in his way to talk and to just approach people, even if he didn’t mean it.

He was so lost in his thoughts he didn’t realize the constant hubbub in the place was now far away, replaced by the sound of fingers running on a piano’s keys and a voice accompanying the melody. This hit him right away, the timbre being so unique it couldn’t go unnoticed. Raising his head, he saw a bunch of people standing around one of the public pianos that had been placed in several main lines stations.

Sitting at it, Jonghyun was there with his perpetual dark outfit, his white hair free this time. He wasn’t focusing on the keys he was grazing, but his eyes were closed as he let his song and the music engulfing him. It was like he was alone, in his own home, without all those persons staring at him ; he was in his space, the space he created with the single sound of his beautiful voice.

Once again, Kibum found himself mesmerized by what was happening in front of him. He stopped walking and only looked at the silhouette he was seeing from the side, listened to the song. It seemed so easy, so natural, the way Jonghyun’s voice escaped his throat and caressed his fleshy lips when going out. As if the young man coud effortlessly sing every single note that existed, his vocal cords able either to alternate a low and a high-pitched tune, or to balance them to propose such a unique, incredible sound.

This guy had a real power, a gem in his throat that made so many people just stop by and listen, as if staring at a work of art in a museum. He was hearing art.

Suddenly, the station’s speakers loudly informed the travellers that the next train was standing at its platform and waited for them to board. As if the magic had been brutally interrupted, bringing everyone back to reality, the singer stopped as well and opened his eyes. Offering a smile at his audience, he bowed his head and his torso, muttering his thanks when someone was putting some money in the little bucket he had put next to the piano.

Kibum looked at everyone leaving the space to go to their train, remaining the only one to still stand here. He only woke up from his strange trance when he saw the singer stand up to pick his bucket up, checking it and smiling. There certainly wasn’t a lot, but the simple fact that there was something was enough for him to feel pleased. He seems in a good mood, the events planner thought, just go to him.

Swallowing with difficulty and with his hands sweaty, he slowly stepped forwards until he reached the piano. He didn’t have to talk because the other man looked up, their gazes meeting and making both of them freeze. And Jonghyun sighed, turning away and grabbing his bag, ready to leave.

“Wait !” Kibum heard himself say loudly, making the singer look at him. “Please, don’t go away.”

“Why ? Are you here to propose me something again ?” The blonde retorted, even though he remained gentle in his way of talking. “I told you I wasn’t interested.”

“Listen, I’ve been so rude yesterday, your reaction was quite understandable. I… I’m sorry ?”

“Are you ? You seem so.”

“Yes, I am. I’m told a lot about how tactless I am and well, you witnessed it. Can we… start again on a sound basis ? Maybe I can offer you some coffee ? Do you like coffee ?”

The singer cocked an eyebrow and remained quiet for a few seconds, pondering the proposal and observing the other man’s face. Eventually, the corners of his lips raised to draw a soft smile, and it radically changed his features ; the brunette’s heart missed a beat.

“I won’t mind a coffee.” He said before offering him his hand. “Kim Jonghyun. That’s me.”

“Yes I know.” Kibum bluntly said and blushed when he realized, shaking the hand in front of him. “S-Sorry, I was looking for you earlier and a little girl told me your name and… nevermind, I’m Kimbum—I mean Kibum. Kim Kibum.”

To his surprise, the blonde slightly laughed and seemed to forget everything that had happened between them the day before. With a hand, he gestured him to lead the way and the taller man just shyly smiled, complying as he headed towards the station’s way out.

A few minutes later, they were both sitting opposite each other in a coffee shop Kibum particularly appreciated. The latter was sipping his Americano and discreetly — he thought so — looking at the singer who was stirring his green tea latte. It had been a surprising choice for a drink, however the more he was observing him, the more the brown haired man thought it somehow suited him. They were silent, none of them knowing if they should talk first or let the other one broach a subject, and they definitely didn’t want to speak in at the same time like some romantic move cliché.

“So…” The events planner eventually said, immediately catching the other’s attention. “Do we talk business or…?”

“Why don’t you talk me about you first ?” Jonghyun asked, his soft voice added to his gentle tone sending shivers down Kibum’s spine. “This way, I will know the person I will perhaps deal with later.”

“M-Me…? I’m just the one planning all of this, not really the guy you could deal with.”

“I see no one else sitting in front of me right now. So, who are you, Kim Kibum ?”

The brunette cleared his throat, losing his usual splendor now that he was asked about himself, moreover by a man he found extremely charming. He took a mouthful of his coffee to earn some time, but the other one was so patient it was just making him more interesting.

“I’m a quite common man, actually.” Kibum ended up saying. “Planning events is my job, I got my own company so… I know how to recognize good opportunities when I meet them.”

“Am I a good opportunity, then ?” The blonde asked, a smile on his lips before he hid them with his cup.

“Can I say a very good one ? I hope it didn’t sound like I wanted to use you just for my business… It wasn’t my intention but you know, tact, all that stuff. I’m rather blunt.”

“Yes, I noticed that. Why me, though ? There are countless singers in this town’s subways, I’m not unique.”

“I think you are, because the way you sing sounds unique. I like music, but I’m complicated when it comes to my musical tastes and… well, it’s not easy to move me, yet you succeeded on your first try.”

“Did I move you ?”

“Listen, you moved me so much I looked for some videos of you on social medias and got drunk in a bar after you rejected me.”

“That’s… blunt.”

Jonghyun laughed and rested his chin on his palm, looking at Kibum with something new in his eyes. There wasn’t any suspicion anymore, but his pupils were sparkling, amused. The events planner smiled in return and felt his cheeks grow hot and pink as he realized he might have said too much in one go.

“You don’t seem as dangerous as I thought, in the end.” The singer commented. “I suppose I should apologize too, you must have thought I was the aggressive paranoid kind.”

“Let’s say you had a good reason.” The other man replied. “Though I didn’t know I looked like a scammer.”

“To be really honest, with your beautiful and professional outfit and your proposal right away… yeah, you really looked like one.”

“You found my outfit beautiful ?”

“I never got to wear something like that so I tend to appreciate these clothes on other people. You wear them well. But I think what you’re wearing right now suits you more.”

“That’s my Sunday clothes though…”

“They’re always the comfiest, that’s why I wear Sunday clothes everyday.”

Kibum’s smile grew brighter by minutes passing, his talk with Jonghyun taking turns he wouldn’t have expected. He learned some things related to the blonde’s passion for music : he had wanted to study it at university but unfortunately failed the entrance exam. He wasn’t someone stupid and had promised himself he would do better the year after, thus he had found a part-time job and had started practicing his singing in the subway.

At first, it had been for his own pleasure and a way for him to never lose his abilities. He even improved his guitar skills thanks to this, although he preferred when a piano accompanied his voice. Everything should have gone well for this young, naive man, but he had fallen in the trap of a few scammers, who promised to fulfill his dream. One after another, they deceived him and let him with a hole on his bank account, without any way to sue them because they knew how to avoid juridic reprisals. As a result of a few swizzles, Jonghyun had almost lost all his money and some his own mother had spent years to save for him.

He never forgave himself for this, and since he couldn’t live in his apartment anymore, he had promised his mom he would make up for his stupidity. All the money he had been earning thanks to his singing for some months, he had gave it back to her. Once his debt would be repaid, he would start thinking of a way to enter that university again.

“Why don’t you find a job that pays more ?” The events planner asked. “I mean… it can take quite a long time to gather enough money with only tips here and there.”

“I want to play music, and to sing.” Jonghyun honestly replied. “I wouldn’t be a good employee, being locked up somewhere would make me sad and I wouldn’t work well. I prefer to take as much time as it needs, and earning money this way. It goes slowly, that’s right, but since I have a roof above my head… I can tolerate it.”

“Is your mom angry with you about all of this…?”

“She was before. But she know how naive I am, so she eventually forgave me. She doesn’t really likes the way I try to repay her, she says there is no need, but I convinced her to let me do so.”

“I see… You know, if I wanted to propose you something yesterday, it’s because I’ve rarely heard someone like you. And… your style kinda matches my friend’s business so if you’re interested in a tactless guy providing some ideas… you don’t have to trust me, though, I would understand.”

“I think I can listen. And you seem more trustable than all these other cunts.”

“What about I show you instead of just talking ?”

With a smile, Kibum took the Blue Night’s business card out of his pocket. It was just like the bar : simple but giving this impression of intimacy, with shades of dark blue and purple as the background of silver letters. The blonde man took it, reading the few informations and pondering the proposal ; it still seemed truer than all the business cards he had been given before. Strangely, he felt attracted by the colors, the atmosphere that was promised by a simple piece of cardboard.

As he looked up, he found the brunette smiling at him.

“Just take the time you need to think about it.” He said while standing up, his cup empty and his hand rummaging in his wallet to put a bill on the table to pay for both drinks. “If you’re interested, come to this address next Wednesday at seven. I’ll book a table for two so it would be nice if you show up.”

“Is it a business proposal or a date ?” Jonghyun smiled. “I’ll see.”

The events planner’s face turned red and he stuttered some incomprehensible words before literally running away, hiding himself in his scarf. Sitting still, the singer quietly laughed and watched the other man leave hastily, bringing his cup to his lips. This business looked interesting.

#jongkey #jonghyun #key #kibum #shinee #multi shot #singing in the subway #live entertainment bar #onho

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sailor-cresselia · 6 years ago

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Zi-O 19 and 20: lol whoops waited a long time, might as well do them at once!

~We now bring you our Quiz Saga Liveblog.~

WhiteWoz’s Storytime Void is infuriating. Both because it’s so visually cluttered with all of the times displayed, and because the MULTITUDE of ticking sounds.

I love that the boys don’t have to stay still to transform. Seeing their transformation backdrops follow them like this, as their running, it’s great!

(I’m still pretty sure that Oma Zi-O’s bizarre chair is his transformation backdrop, by the way. At least, assuming that he’s not Another Zi-O.)

Is that a GOOGLY EYE on Another Quiz’s forehead?!

Sougo’s using the gun mode an awful lot lately.

“That monster is mine.” Yeah, it sure is, buddy. It SURE IS.

Hm, don’t think I noticed last time, but “The lessons of the past can’t be clouded by lies” is what’s playing over the shot of Rider Woz in the OP. Does that apply to the lessons of the future, as well?

Hey, Kamen Rider Quiz. You’re a little overpowered, there. We’ve already got ONE reality warper affecting our actions. We don’t need two, thank you very much.

I can FEEL the ‘We are not okay with this fight’ just RADIATING off of both Sougo and Geiz as this guy’s attacking them.

Geiz is still immediately here for the Woz’s nicknames, and Sougo’s getting a kick out of ticking off ‘his’ Woz. I love it.

The Another Rider and the Original Rider both existing at the same time… I haven’t seen the rest of the episode, of course, but I’d guess it’s a combination of “someone brought Actual Quiz back in time”, “Sequence Breaking”, and “The rules of time travel aren’t nearly as set in stone as they have been led to believe.”

(Yes, I’m sticking to that particular gun, come Helheim or high water.)

Sougo has a point – BlackWoz doesn’t come along for the fights, like, ever. He didn’t last time against Another Shinobi, not really. Not on his own; he was following Sougo to try and keep him away. So YES, Sougo’s calling you out on being out of character.

HI YES have I mentioned I really like when this season does ‘parallel version splitscreen’ shots? Like, during the Gaim arc with the two Sougos, and during “Fourze and Faiz” with Sougo and Geiz in the two respective time planes. It’s GREAT.

It’s a thing that the past few seasons have done, actually – these sort of split-views of characters. Ex-Aid used it a number of times for Emu and Parad’s conversations when they were fighting each other, particularly as Mighty Brothers XX L and R, where they went back and forth showing the suits in the ‘real world’ and the civilians in a mirrory, shadowy mindscape. Then, in Another Ending, there were several times during Genm vs Lazer that Kiriya and Kuroto were juxtaposed with their Rider forms. THAT was played a lot in the second half of Build – scenes alternating between having the armor and the civilian talking in the middle of a fight. To say nothing of the Takumi/Sento swaps, where they would sometimes change which actor was present when Takumi was talking. Sometimes. I really like that ‘form meets function’ aspect – remind the viewer who is under the mask, or who’s in the pilots seat, and it’s just really cool. The synchronized alt-selves talking is just another extension of that, be it a time-displaced Sougo or a Woz from a different timeline altogether.

… um.

Actually, whatever happened to “3 days from now” Sougo?

Suuuure, these are the only two options. Riiiight. “Take Quiz’s power (and totally kill your friend)” or “No More Mutants Riders.” Yeaaaah, we’ll get RIGHT on that, thanks Woz’s.

AHAHAHA NO. Uncle Tokiwa… ‘given how long it’s been stopped’ that watch is a Tragic Keepsake for Quiz, isn’t it? I mean, he’s from the future and all, so.

“Oh! Sougo, you have a lot of friends who like clocks! This one can stay for lunch too!”

“Um, uncle, no, this one has directly tried to kill me, actually, so maybe not-”

Ohhh. Right… Assuming the ‘riders lose their memories without their powers’ is true, which the characters all still believe is, even though i’m not so sure…

Taking Quiz’s powers while he’s… um, 2040 minus 2019 is…

Taking Quiz’s powers while he’s 21 years in the past is NOT a good thing.

“You will soon be forced to make some rather merciless decisions. Consider this practice.”

HEY WHITE WOZ. I’m not liking your expressions here. That’s waay more sketchy than someone who ‘supports’ their ‘savior’ has any business looking. Like, not even a creepy adoration sketchy, just. Plain creepy.

Oh no, that’s right, Another Quiz is Actual Quiz’s father. And now Mondo says that ‘he was talented, according to [his] mother.” Which means that in the proper timeline that he’s from… he never knew his father.

(Re-Ray plays quietly in the background)

Sougo has ZERO points. Poor Tsukuyomi only has three. Mondo quit it, you’re the GUEST here. Show some mercy on your poor, moronic host.

Geiz, what’re ya doing sneaking downstairs? (It could only be Geiz, because he’s wearing pants that fit.)

(gasp) GEIZ! You’re not wearing your harness! I was starting to think it was part of you!

(Congratulations! You didn’t do a violence!)

~skipping to the fight~

INSERT SONG: GEIZ TIME!

Okay, but really, when are they releasing these? And how many more are we going to get? Because so far I’m liking what I’m hearing, from this one and from Sougo’s in ep 16.

Not really sure what those sound effects are with your Ex-Aid armor today, though, Geiz.

Decade!OOO is Tajador. We want our bird.

BUT. Sougo’s movements are… eerily Eiji-like right now.

Hey, didn’t I say something about ‘when he stops being a knock-off, that’s when we need to worry?’ That would have been… right, last time was when I was watching the raw of episode 15. When Sougo was pulling off a pretty decent version of the Rabbit Tank Sparkling finisher. And then in 16, he was using Mighty Brothers XX pretty accurately, as well.

HM.

They go for the finisher, and the music stops dead when Hora freezes time. It’s disconcerting enough when that they do that with the background music. When it’s VOCALS that cut out, it’s terrifying.

Neither Geiz or Sougo are meant to take attacks from other Kamen Riders. It’s why Geiz was so poorly off after that curb-stomp Sougo gave him in the first part of “OOO and Genm.” It’s why Decade dealt so much more damage to both of them. And they just got hit with each other’s finishers.

WhiteWoz cares not for your puny ‘morals’ or ‘sense of right and wrong’ or ‘geiz’s growing realization that he’s not going to be able to go through with killing zi-o’.

WhiteWoz cares not for anyone.

Hey, Showy McSynth Pop? I don’t think it counts as winning if you hack the timeline to let yourself win.

So, Quiz’s backstory is breaking my heart. He just wants to see if his father actually loved his mother. That’s tragic. “Until she knows the truth, I don’t think my mother will be able to move on.”

About as equally tragic? Sougo’s line. “I think I understand.” said hesitantly, as he sits down, with restrained movements. Usually, when he’s Sougo (as opposed to Zi-O), the kids arms are almost constantly in some sort of motion. But he folded them and sat quietly down.

Sougo… what happened to your parents?

Geiz, baby, please tell me that the attack is at least partly a stunt? That you talked to Mondo before you guys came here?

Geiz??

(enter episode 20!)

We’re back to BlackWoz’s Storytime Vault! Hooray!

So: Sougo gets BlackWoz to help him and Mondo get out, via nifty Magic Scarf powers. Hora brings Another Quiz with her. And WhiteWoz is a total creeper calling them cowards.

The sunlight light overtaking Geiz and going into the 20 Rider Kicks logo is GREAT. Not only is it a great method for a transition, but it keeps us from seeing what Geiz is feeling – which it needs to, right now.

I’m pretty sure that was a sigh of relief from Geiz when Sougo and company left, after all.

The sequence breaking Another Riders seem to be a lot MORE painful to become than the Regular Another Riders… and those were already painful to watch. (Another Quiz’s eyes flashed red and blue briefly when he transformed, that’s nifty!)

Yup, I was right. The watch is a Tragic Keepsake. It was Mondo’s dads, and I think it broke today.

Sougo shows off his ‘Low INT, High WIS’ stats again. Did terribly at the quiz last episode, but can tell that Mondo’s not just here for his mothers sake. (Sougo, what happened to your parents?)

Geiz asks Tsukuyomi what Sougo would do. Well, he asks what “Zi-O” would do, and I eagerly await the day we get to see “Zi-O” become “Sougo” for him. Please let it happen. I’m still upset that nobody expect for Kasumi and Kazumin ever called Ryuuga by his name, this is almost as bad.

When she says that he’d try and prioritize Mondo’s feelings, he replies that “I guess we’ll have to fight. Make sure you tell him that.”

I don’t think that’s what you actually mean, Geiz. I think you’ve got a plan.

I hope you’ve got a plan. … one that you’ll be able to follow through on, because we know full well how that original plan is going.

And through these last two scenes – inside and outside of 9-to-5, the piano version of Over Quartzer is playing. It’s a thing of beauty.

Hm. “I guess we’ll have to fight”… Geiz, you were talking about you and Sougo, as opposed to you and Mondo, weren’t you? Because you went straight for Zi-O, not for Quiz. Clever boy.

Wait, when did you get Build?! I get that the watches are interchangeable, but you’ve been running Ex-Aid a lot lately, too.

(Now I kind of want to know if the Cross-Z and Genm watches are compatible with the Decade adapter…)

Sougo took a BEATING with that Build finisher, didn’t he…?

Nah, not as much as he could have… it looks like Geiz was pulling his punches, so to speak.

Sougo pulls the ‘which Woz are you?’ gag, and actually gets BlackWoz to refer to himself as such. Sougo gets a kick out of that, Tsukuyomi is dully surprised, and Woz is disgusted with himself.

Heehee… neither of them are telling their respective Woz’s what their own plans are. And neither of them are actually agreeing with their respective Woz’s goals.

Pity the respective Woz’s don’t acknowledge that last fact.

Sougo asks what Geiz would do… and when Tsukuyomi tells him that Geiz asked her the same respective question about him… that seems to tell Sougo everything he needs to know.

Low INT, High WIS. Sougo, you’re a deceptively devious little twig, aren’t you?

(WhiteWoz, knocking Hora down wasn’t necessary. Because I don’t believe for a SECOND that Geiz did THAT.)

Sougo, you deceptively observant little twig.

“So… Tsukuyomi said that Geiz asked her what I would do. I know I would let them interact. So, if he’s doing what I would do, then that’d be why he attacked me up there. So now I have to hold up his end of what he would do, and go straight to getting rid of the obstacle. So, I’ll take on RiderWoz, and let Geiz lead the father-son chat.”

So… The HeiGen Forever movie IS, in fact, canon, then? Because that’s the Double Ridewatch right there. And- pft – the Gaia Memory shoulder pads are temporarily little stick figures – pftHAHAHA! And they do the pre-transformation pose before attaching – this is absurd oh my god!

Of COURSE beating Another Quiz could work with Kamen Rider Quiz!

If a Riders power can only exist at one point in time; which still sounds fake, but I’ll allow it for now; the one that comes later seems to take priority. All the previous Another Riders were made after the Proper Rider already existed. That’s why the watches that our riders use had to be picked up in the present day – that way, they came into existence after the Another Rider did.

The exception to that is Shinobi, who didn’t exist at all yet, and was rendered impossible by being his own Another Rider.

In this case, Kamen Rider Quiz technically is the later iteration. He became a Rider in the future, and he’s here via time travel. So, chronologically speaking, Another Quiz came into existence in 2019, but Kamen Rider Quiz does not exist yet. So he can be considered the ‘replacement’.

SOUGO NO DO THE FINISHER IN THE LIGHT I WANT TO SEE IT PROPE-

wait it’s a Double finisher with CYCLONE JOKER? Maybe I don’t want to see it properly, Joker’s finishers are usually borderline body-horror…

Okay no, we’re good, it’s still iffy but it’s not nearly Joker Extreme levels of iffy, so we’re fine. I am A-OK with this finisher being a bootleg.

RiderWoz is OP. Sougo’s REALLY hurting after that.

Sougo and Geiz are. Not. Meant. To. Fight. Riders.

This scene with Mondo questioning his father is absolutely heartwrenching you guys. Made even more so by the piano version of Over Quartzer picking up where it left off earlier.

And then RiderWoz just has to come in and ruin everything. And use some TOTAL overkill on those attacks – oh GOD with actual lightning bolts and everything, and I had thought Quiz’s attacks were brutal when HE was doing them?

WhiteWoz cares not for your puny human morals or ethics.

Hey. HEY. What did those two watches just DO to Geiz? The bizarre vision thing is one problem as is, the electric shock is another, but something ELSE about that just effected him. Poorly.

WhiteWoz is in some serious trouble.

Hey. HEY. ProperWoz. What is that watch you just handed to Uncle Tokiwa? Why do you have Sougo’s upgrade?

I am glaring in the directions of BOTH Woz iterations. You’re BOTH super sketchy. But at least the first Woz is a more tolerable type of sketchy. At least he doesn’t seem to delight in other peoples pain.

SO I’m having fun with this again! Just have to hold out hope that they know what they’re doing with the previous riders, and keep going!

After all...

Mondo doesn’t seem to have lost his memories, now does he?

#kamen rider zi o #sailorcressy says

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