#so uuuh life happened and kept happening

[cheery-space-lizz]

It's been 84 years but here is my contribution to the @supercorpzine v5!! (+ a lil close up)

Anyway forever grateful for being allowed to partake in such a beautiful project

Have a some sunsety gays stealing a kiss midflight 😌

[0bticeo]

lurk | feyd-rautha

part one of five. (part 2.) (part 3.) (part 4.)

summary:

feyd-rautha. 

there he is, strong arms spread wide, dual blades stained black, basking in the glorious aftermath of combat. at his feet, atreides soldiers. dead.

you unsheathe your blade, the dull metal grinding against its sheath.

it is kill or be killed, and you intend to live.

wc: 2k

tw: blood. death. non graphic description of gore (this is a gladiator fight). mentions of eugenics. fighting as foreplay. reader may or may not have a blood kink. knife kink??? reader is more refined than feyd but don't let it fool you she's a freak. uuuh hubris? probable inaccurate handling of dune lore, esp with the voice (forgive me for the creative liberty of assuming the mother of the kwisatz haderach should be a freak. as a treat.)

many, many years ago, the sisterhood deems you ready for the gom jabbar. you enter the room, your mother a looming shadow, hands folded in her sleeves, head bowed before a long figure cloaked in shadows.

it doesn’t sit right with you, this intrusion in your mother’s parlor. how dare that old witch make a servant out of your mother in her own house?

“kneel.”

you do. you fall to your knees. before you, a phalto green box. in it, pain. at your neck, the gom jabbar, its deadly poison whispering into your ear.

it tells you about sweet, sweet little death. it tells you the reverend mother will not put your life in danger. not when you’re the culmination of nineteen generations of careful planning.

you are to be married to a harkonnen and bear the kwisatz haderach.

so you raise your head and put your hand in the box, eyes boring into the old crone’s. you see something flash in her depthless eyes. you think of the calm before mother-storms, the stillness of the air before pounding rain. 

it’s rage.

pain shoots through your hand. fire that burns and charrs and eats away at your flesh, consuming one layer of skin after another until you’re sure it reaches the bone below. you almost scream. instead, you bite your lip until metal-blood stains your tongue. 

you will endure this pain. you will not let fear consume you — you have nothing to fear, you shall not die, not here. fear is the mind killer. pain is the mind killer. you will let it wash over you and face the eons of bene gesserit knowledge standing before you.

through gritted teeth, you ask:

“am i human enough, oh wise one?”

you were. otherwise you wouldn’t be here, years later, rotting in a harkonnen cell. 

(there are things that have been kept a secret from you. you have been raised following your mother’s footsteps in the weirding way. the reverend mother denied you a place under her tutelage with harsh words and a harsher look. you’ve caught wind of her thoughts in shimmering fragments of dreams — what has jessica done?)

it will matter, in the end, that your mother decided to give your father a son. already, you’ve seen it, behind the web of your eyelids, the lone silhouette of your brother, blood of your blood, rising, rising.

he will gather them, the fremen, from the burning sands of arrakis, and rise, blade glinting under scorching sun. lisan al gaib, they already call him, hushed whispers lost in the shifting sands of dunes. 

your hand falls to your womb, empty still. 

they were scared, the bene gesserit. the atreides line was growing too powerful, too fast. you — the promised daughter, skilled in the way, with tongue and mind sharper than your blade — are to be bred and deliver the one.

but in came paul — beloved little mouse of a younger brother. too smart, too observant, too skilled, too much. your mother’s defiance, your mother’s love for your father led her to commit the unthinkable and defy the order.

it retaliated.

you’ve been betrayed. that, you’ve seen coming. so did your father. so did your mother. even your brother felt it, in his very bones, the low thrum of wrongness. something was bound to happen. something was bound to shake you to your very core. 

something happened.

the harkonnens came. house atreides fell. you can still smell it, the stench of death, the bloodied sands beneath your feet as you struck and struck.

all must die, and so they did.

you feel it still, the blood coating your hands, your forearms, dripping from your blade, the old scar on your forearm burning righteous fury. 

they caught you, in the end. you, who willingly put a target on your back, allowing your brother and mother’s quiet escape. you, beaten down, bloodied. grinning, voice warping the harkonnen rats’ perception.

“you will not see me as i am.”

the atreides have been set up. offering arrakis has been nothing but a convenient way for the emperor to get rid of your bloodline.

you scoff; in the quiet depths of your cell, your fingers dig crescent moons in your palms.

you’ve been taught to read behind veils upon veils of lies. the truthsayer suggested the eradication of your house. painted you a threat.

being able to breed the kwisatz haderach won’t protect you.

so here you are, eldest daughter of duke leto atreides and lady jessica, older sister to paul atreides. here you are, sitting with your back pressed up against the wall. cold seeps into your marrow, reaching bone. rage simmers low in your gut. you quell it. nurse it until it becomes a living beast eager to feast.

you will need it.

your body fails you. your sight is blurry, your hands tremble. they should not. duncan would have hit the back of your head had he been there. he isn’t. (dead.) breathe in. breathe out. focus what’s left of your attention on the too small bowl of food that’s been given to you, on the glass of water. empty, both of them. 

poison isn’t a problem — not with your training, not with the constant shifting and turning of lethal molecules within you. there. prana bindu — precise alteration of the body’s vitals. you will bear your condition for a time, weakened, but alive.

you clench your fist and slam it against the wall. pain surges through you, burning through your joint. good. if fear is the mind killer, pain clears the fog clogging your brain.

here goes: you’re rotting in the cell of your hereditary enemy, malnourished and poisoned. you’ve heard the guards, their off handed comments when they thought you too drugged to understand. your cell is below an arena. you will need to fight. perhaps, they’ll pit you against your men. the atreides house, dying by its own hand. fitting. 

you’re neck-deep in trouble.

the door slides open. two guards come in, all dressed in black. harkonnens. harkonnens everywhere, and you cannot do a damned thing as they pull you up, pushing you out of your cell. they’re laughing. those bastards are laughing.

one less atreides scum in the known universe — good riddance!

you will tear into them and rip out their spine with your teeth.

they drag you in a maze of hallways, each darker than the last. you’re ascending, a catabasis of twists and turns and sliding doors. there’s a low thrum in your gut. louder and louder with each step is a pulse. a chant. a name. 

the guards press a blade in your hand and push you forward.

the door slides up. shadows part. you blink with a low hiss. light pours down on you, all-consuming, blinding. sands stretch before you, unnaturally white.

the arena.

thousands upon thousands of people gaze down at you. the voice surges forward, eons of your foremother speaking through you.

“you will not perceive me as i am.”

something trickles down your nose. blood. you’ve overdone it. the voice isn’t meant to be used against that many people, not for long.

you wipe it off.

it will have to hold for the time of this fight. the harkonnen won’t rest until the atreides are completely and utterly wiped out. deceit is your only chance at survival.

the thought makes your blood boil. 

good thing the crowd is screaming for it. they're all screaming for it. a pulse. a chant. a name.

feyd-rautha. 

there he is, strong arms spread wide, dual blades stained black, basking in the glorious aftermath of combat. at his feet, atreides soldiers. dead.

you unsheathe your blade, the dull metal grinding against its sheath.

the noise alone has him turning towards you, head tilting to the side. he’s assessing you, na-baron feyd-rautha harkonnen. he glances up. for a split second, you follow his gaze. above, looking down upon you, is baron vladimir harkonnen, gargantuan mass of flesh.

you want him to collapse. to watch as his bones break under the weight of monstrous grease. you make out the movement of his lips.

happy birthday, nephew.

he’s on you before you can react. your blade raises. steel meets steel. you clench your teeth. his strength surpasses yours. you won’t yield, not to him. but by god is the bastard strong. you’ve got your hands full with just parrying his blows, the force of them echoing in your very bones. your feet slide on the sand below. any more and you’ll lose your footing.

his blades meet yours, again and again, their serrated edge slicing the corrupt air of the arena. they slice through you, too. a vicious cut on your bare forearm has you reeling back, your blade and sheath raising to parry.

this is bad. there’s only so much you can deal with in your decrepit state. fighting to survive isn’t an option — you must kill or be killed.

.

.

.

you draw in a sharp breath.  

watchful eyes bore down upon you. bene gesserit. the reverend mother herself has come to geidi prime.

something at your side — you let your guard down. there’s a flash, a metallic clang. feyd-rautha gazes down upon you, apex predator with your death written in the greedy sands of the arena. here, you’re precious prey. 

rage grips you by the throat and has you baring your teeth.

there you are, blades intertwined with harkonnen scum, a breath away from his lips. they part in a slow, assessing grin. you feel more than you see his appraising gaze raking over you. you, unyielding, matching him blow for blow, blood drip drip dripping down. under the black sun of geidi prime, it, too, has turned a velvety black.

from above your crossed blades, you raise your head and meet his eyes — twin pools of dark, abysses made to consume you whole. time slows down. you want to drown in the marrow of him and feel the warmth of his flesh beneath yours, lost in rapturous agony. something settles in your gut, low and warm.

you call it fury.

you pivot out of the way and nick him, a thin cut splitting open the skin of his cheek. he laughs. slashes at you with deathly precision. you duck, squatting down, leg springing forth, slamming at the back of his knee. he falls. catches you by the ankle and drags you to him.

you snarl. 

“let go.”

how utterly pathetic of you. his grip falters. you hear his blades fall to the ground. you twist, pivot until you’re straddling him, blade pressed against his throat.

there you have it. internal carotid, right below the sculpted edge of his jaw. five minutes until death. five minutes, with his lifeblood coating your hands, soaking your robes, sinking down to your skin beneath.

your hand cramps on the handle of your weapon, in a mockery of rigor mortis. nervous impulse. the tip of the blade pierces tender flesh, drawing a droplet of blood. you follow its path down the column of his flesh, until it reaches the edge of his collarbone.

his hands surges forward, seizing your forearm in a vice grip, yanking you towards him. you feel his breath on your lips with his next words.

“do it.”

his voice sends a shiver down your spine. low, gravelly, it calls for blood. if you don’t spill his, yours will be drawn. yet, you do not move, eyes riveted to his face, to the vicious impatience carved in his features. if you kill him, you’ll be hunted and put down like a dog. 

he shifts under you, the nervous twitch of a beast untamed. even through the hard edges of his ritual armor, you can feel the raw power of him.

you feel his thumb trace the edge of an old scar, up, up your forearm, a flash of black teeth and then— 

pain.

there’s something in your side, serrated, razor-sharp, twisting. your hand raises to your side. warmth trickles down your fingers. his hand wraps over yours, warm, blood a silky black against the porcelain of his skin.

he watches you, twisting the blade until yours fall to the ground, bloodied hand coming up to your cheek. you lean into it. welcome him, as his thumb smears blood across the edge of your parted lips.

“you fought well, atreides.” 

he pulls out the blade.

you fall.

taglist: @kpopnstarwars @jaiuneamesolitaiire

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Ur writing is so easy to dive into I desperately need more!!! Is there more???? What happens to this awful wet cat of a woman next?????????????

uuuh. this.

in reference to this, for anyone who finds this just incomprehensible.

It turned out that she wasn't going to be left alone to rot in peace.

It turned out that she wasn't going to be left alone to rot in peace.

On Jessie’s disgustingly cheerful, rainbow-spangled doormat (an impulse purchase from a previous June that currently pissed her off every time she looked at it) a cupcake, a birthday card, and a note torn from a yellow legal pad were waiting for her.

The cupcake was chocolate topped with a mountain of blue buttercream frosting and edible glitter, and if Jessie's day kept going this badly it was probably going to end up being her dinner.

The card, also coated in glitter, wished her a happy birthday and was signed with a flourish from Uncle Ray. Ray wasn’t related to her in any biological sense of the word, but he’d been a friend of Jessie’s father since before Jessie was born, and that had to count for something. It was like her brother always said: family wasn’t about who you were related to, it was about who was there for you.

Uncle Ray was also, unfortunately, the owner of the building Jessie currently lived in and therefore her landlord, which was currently counting for way too much.

On the note he’d left her a hurried, shaky-handed explanation: he was sorry to miss her, hoped she was having fun on her birthday, and as a gift he’d be waiving May’s rent, which they both knew perfectly well was extremely overdue. However, he warned, he expected the money for June right on time at the start of the month, and if she failed to deliver they were going to need to have a very serious talk about Jessie’s status as a tenant moving forward.

And then, because Uncle Ray was Uncle Ray, he’d given her a little wiggle room: a PS, informing her that Mrs. Hoang said her dishwasher was acting up again, and that he’d happily credit the repair towards Jessie’s account if it meant he didn’t have to call in his idiotic repairman. Jessie didn’t understand for the life of her the psychological warfare that was going on between the two of them, or why Ray didn’t just fire the poor dunce if he hated him so much, but she wasn’t going to turn down the opportunity to get paid for hanging out with Mrs. Hoang. Jessie loved old people, and Mrs. Hoang was a hoot. 

She pretended not to see the second maintenance job he offered her, fixing up a dryer and a washer in the basement that had both started spitting people’s quarters back out at them when they were done running. It had taken Jessie a long time to figure out how to make them do that, and she wasn’t one to foul up her own handiwork. 

Alright. Alright. This wasn't good, exactly, but she had somewhere to start, something to keep her occupied instead of completely falling apart. If she didn't give herself a little task right this second she would probably do what she had been doing for days at a time ever since Jonas left: wallowing in her own misery, eating weed gummies and jacking off, listening to true crime podcasts and shopping online until it was time to microwave something for dinner. If the morons in the Brig could see her like that they would cream their standard issue sweatpants. She decided to implement a new rule of personal conduct: whenever she found herself doing something that would make Whirligig feel like she was winning their friend breakup, Jessie had to cut that shit out immediately.

With that in mind, Jessie dragged herself to the bathroom to shower off the morning’s disgrace and wash her hair for the first time in, arguably, too many days. When the hot water ran out, something that she would be holding her uncle accountable for, she toweled off and crawled into a ratty tank top and snowflake-patterned pajama pants. A laundry day outfit for sure, but a.) it actually was laundry day, thank you very much, and b.) she deserved some time in soft clothing after spending the night packed into her catsuit like a can of spam. Then came the first of several trips up and down too many flights of stairs, because despite the criminal lack of an elevator Jessie was determined to throw all of her heaps of laundry into the wash at once. It was sort of a dick move, monopolizing all the washers like that, but she couldn’t wait around all day and her neighbors would forgive her when they realized that all of the machines would spit their change back out now. What, like Jessie had enough quarters for that many loads of laundry? In this economy?

Then she shuffled to the second floor to see Mrs. Hoang, who didn’t care that she was in pajamas and insisted that Jessie stay to have some soup before she started fiddling with the dishwasher. It was a damn good soup, extra spicy bún bò that filled her up so well that she was glad she’d neglected to eat her cupcake. Jessie ate it without saying much, offering a sympathetic ear and supportive scoffs while Mrs. Hoang talked about the convoluted feuds she kept up with various shopkeepers and other elderly women in the neighborhood.

As usual Mrs. Hoang left the TV on while she talked, the news turned down to almost nothing. She hardly seemed to notice it was on, but Jessie’s eye was caught when the puff pieces dissolved into a scene from downtown earlier that day. Nothing too shocking, by Rustbelt’s standards: Ricochet, red and self-righteous, duking it out with some new nobody on the scene, disrupting downtown traffic earlier that afternoon. Jessie ran the numbers, and figured this must have taken place not long at all after she was ingloriously dispatched from N.E.X.T. Had Ric already known? Was that why she was in such a hurry to send Jessie packing? It was nice to imagine there was a reason rather than her archenemy being an asshole, but she knew it was more likely the latter. 

In any case, the new kid hardly seemed like he was worth it. Sure, he was putting on a show. Whatever his trick was, he managed to shatter every pane of glass out of the sparkling facade of the Van Houten Charitable Foundation, a window virtually made of buildings, and send the shards surging across Central Square straight at Ricochet. She was fine, of course, boinging away to safety like the world’s bitchiest little frog, but the cars and businesses around her were definitely going to need some TLC. Hopefully they had powers insurance; you’d have to be a fool to live in Rustbelt without it. And this was a crystal clear claim, in Jessie’s inexpert opinion, caught on camera from multiple angles and everything.

But the actual so-called villain? Pathetic. Amateur hour. Nobody knew his name, for one, because he hadn’t bothered to announce himself, so the chyron at the bottom of the screen could only refer to him as “mystery criminal.” Hardly inspiring stuff; nobody was going to be shelling out for merch of Mystery Criminal. And he hadn’t even bothered to get a decent outfit together, instead showing up in ratty black skinny jeans and a green hoodie like he was fresh off a shift at Hot Topic. He was wearing a backpack, for fucks sake! The only points Jessie would give him were for the fact that he’d at least had the presence of mind to keep the hood up, which was concealing his face to an impressive degree. None of the security cameras or cell phone footage seemed to have gotten a clear look at his face, so at least that was something.

Still, she wasn’t impressed.

“I can’t stand it when these wannabes come crawling out of the woodwork with no direction, no goals, no panache, no nothing,” she said to Mrs. Hoang. “Like, you’re not a villain just because you have powers. If you’re not going to put any artistry into it, you might as well just put your hand in your pocket to pretend you have a gun and go rob a 7/11.”

“Well, not everyone can be as professional as you. You’ve got the passion for it, more than anybody I’ve ever met in my life.” Mrs. Hoang said from beside the kitchen window, where she was on her second cigarette and blowing smoke rings. She was a pack a day kind of broad with a voice to match, and Jessie admired the old-school panache even if she shuddered to imagine the state of Mrs. Hoang’s lungs.

The compliment made her blush. “Thank you. You really mean that?”

Mrs. Hoang shrugged. “I’ve met every type of criminal they make, right? And nobody’s having more fun than you. There are kingpins living in palaces on their own tropical islands who don’t like what they do as much as you do. I think you’re made for this.”

“God, thank you. I’ve been kind of, like, second-guessing myself lately.”

“What? Since when?”

“I don’t know. Like, this morning?”

Jessie gave Mrs. Hoang the abridged version, leaving out details here and there that made her seem extra pathetic—namely, the thing about Ricochet’s secret identity. Jessie didn’t mind painting herself as a victim of N.E.X.T.’s bullying, but she didn’t want to implicate Jonas in anything. The two of them had to present a united front always; that was one of their rules. Still, she was pretty sure she got across exactly how fucked she was, which was why it surprised her when Mrs. Hoang simply shrugged her bony shoulders again.

“You’ll figure it out,” she proclaimed.

“Yeah but, like, how?”

“Well, that part’s not my job. What, you think I’m going to train you? You think I’m trying to be your fucking Mr. Miyagi?” Mrs. Hoang cackled so hard at her own joke that she made herself cough, pounding her chest until she got it back together. “Look, you’re a great girl. I’d let you marry one of my grandsons.”

“You said you’d disown them if they married white people!”

“Eh, I’m getting desperate with this one. He’s a good boy, smart, but he’s got no direction. No ambition. All he does after work is go home to play his video games. I think girls scare him.” She looked at Jessie meaningfully. “He’d be an easy husband, is all I’m saying. He works in tech, makes lots of money that you could spend however you want. And a tough girl like you could really sort him out.”

“I really appreciate it, but I’m not marrying your cringefail loser grandson. That feels wrong, somehow. Like, extremely wrong. I feel like you’re trying to sell him to me.”

“See? You’re a good girl,” Mrs. Hoang said. “But you’re also an eel. That’s the point I was getting to. You’re slippery. You’ll wiggle around and bite whoever you need to so you can survive, because you have to. What else would you do? What is there for you, if not being a villain?”

That wasn’t a rhetorical question; she had a hard look to her face like she actually expected answers. So Jessie scrambled, trying to come up with anything else she might feasibly do to pay the bills.

“I mean, sales? I used to do that.”

“Where’s the last place you were a salesgirl?”

“This snooty-ass jewelry place in the mall. Mostly selling engagement rings and stuff. I kind of hated it, and they ended up firing me for, you know. Stealing an engagement ring with a big honkin’ diamond in it.” 

“You can’t work sales, girl. You love to steal.”

“Okay! But what about, like, waitressing?”

“You’ve done that before?”

“No, but I know how restaurants work. I can hold things. I’m good with people. How hard can it be?”

Mrs. Hoang waved her cigarette scoldingly in Jessie’s direction. “First of all, you apologize to waitresses. That’s skilled work. You can hold things, but what are you going to  do when some tight-ass starts yelling at you for not bringing her shitty kid enough chicken strips? And your feet hurt, and half your dipshit coworkers didn't show up for shift, the head cook is on meth, and nobody's tipping worth shit?”

Jessie tried and failed a few times to come up with what was probably the right answer, and ultimately landed on something a lot closer to the truth. “I don’t know, call in a bomb threat and go home early? Jesus Christ, that sounds like a nightmare.”

“Apologize to waitresses!”

“Sorry, waitresses.” She rolled something around in her mouth, unsure if she should say it at all, then figured it couldn’t hurt to dig herself in a little deeper. “There’s this other place that’s, like, super shady and hires girls who don’t even have to serve the wings, they just walk around in costumes. So like models, basically. It’s superhero themed, and they just have all these girls there to hang out dressed up as the slutty Halloween costume version of heroes and villains and stuff. I figure they might hire me on the spot if they realize who I am, because having the real Frostbite is kind of a get, right? And then I get paid to just, like, hang out with other cute girls and take pictures with people like a character at Disneyland.” Not that Jessie had ever been to Disneyland, but she gets the idea. 

“Okay, so what’s stopping you from doing that? Go apply right now.”

Jessie groaned. “But, like, I know that the first time some guy gets too grabby I’m going to break his fingers and get turbo fired. And also there’s a chance that they’ll tell me I’m too fat to play Frostbite, which is, like, you know. Obviously I’ll just have to burn the entire restaurant down, which is probably illegal.”

Mrs. Hoang nodded like this was all going about as well as she’d expected. “Anything else?”

“Well, like, I have the crafting thing, right? Like, I take some commissions and stuff. I could pivot to do that full time?”

“No. Never try to make a hobby your whole life. You’ll end up hating it.” Mrs. Hoang nodded to the soup simmering on the stove, making a face. “I like to cook. You know what happened when I tried to start a restaurant?”

“You ended up having to burn it down, change your name, and leave San Jose forever.”

“And kill my second husband.”

“You killed your… I don’t know if you’ve ever told me that part before.”

Mrs. Hoang shrugged, as if to say that sometimes second husbands had to die and there was nothing that could be done about it. “He was more of a business partner than a husband, really. Not a lot of love. Sometimes it’s the partner that’s the problem, you know what I mean?”

“I’m not killing my brother,” Jessie said flatly.

“No, no. But you don’t need him, either. You’re smart, tough, quick-thinker. Go find someone else to do crime with you. You want to hang around with pretty girls in costumes so much, go find some yourself. Every big villain I see on TV, he’s got some lay sidekick in a sparkly little outfit. Why not you?”

“I mean, those girls are all union. I can’t afford moll rates.”

“So don’t hire a professional, dumbass. Get a friend,” Mrs. Hoang said. She flicked a little ash off her cigarette derisively. “You remember how to do that?”

“Yeah,” said Jessie, who wasn’t actually sure of that at all. When was the last time she’d made a friend? There was Whirligig, which had obviously been an ass-shattering disaster. Even before it broke really bad, there had never really been a lot of love between them. Then there was Xochitl, who Jessie actually liked and had still managed to completely blow her chances with. That one was still so raw that she couldn’t even joke about it. God, why couldn’t Xo have just yelled at her like a normal person? It would be so much easier if they could just hate each other now. And she’d made a hell of an effort with Night Noir when they did that little crossover job in the fall, but all that had gotten her was the worst ghosting of her life. 

Maybe she didn’t actually know how to make a friend. Maybe she could start by finding a henchperson and figure it out from there. She didn’t really need a friend friend, right? A partner would suffice. Anyone to fill the Jonas-shaped void while Jessie figured out how to go it alone. Sure, she and her brother had been a team. But anyone could watch her back, right? That was hardly skilled labor.

“You really think I can do it? Run my own shit?” 

It was a question for herself as much as for Mrs. Hoang, one of the biggest things that had been pinning her into inaction for the past few months even as it became increasingly clear that she needed to do literally anything. The solution was obvious, really; there was no other path Jessie could take. But the prospect of figuring out how to do it all alone, of having to stand without Jonas’ support for the first time in her life, was scaring her shitless. 

Mrs. Hoang sighed. “What do you like about it? Being a villain?”

Jessie hadn’t expected another question, but this time she was immediately ready with an answer. 

“It’s fun. I mean, it’s hard and stressful and it's kind of scary, but it’s never boring. Every job is a different challenge, and I really like that. And things actually happen. At most jobs you do the same thing over and over again every day to try and keep everything the same forever, right? If you do everything right, nothing really changes. Best case scenario, some months you sell more stuff than last month. But if I do my job right I get to go home with a diamond the size of my ass cheek, because I was smart enough and tough enough and ballsy enough to take it when nobody else was. And there’s no CEO or boss or board of directors who get to take a cut or give me a bad performance review or anything. Nobody can fire me. Nobody can tell me what to do. I’m free to do whatever I want.”

She stumbled a little on the last part, because it wasn’t exactly true anymore. Ricochet very much had told her what to do, had even taken away her freeze ray to really rub it in, and Jessie had no fucking idea what she was supposed to do about that. She had spent years thinking of Ricochet like a yappy little dog, irksome but easy enough to kick away when she got too annoying. And now it turned out she wasn’t scared of Jessie and never had been, and Jessie’s head was still spinning.

Mrs. Hoang cleared her throat, snatching Jessie’s attention back. “You know how you look, when you talk about it?”

“What?”

“You talk about being a villain like you’re in love. You get this look on your face like my third husband used to get, back when we were falling in love.”

“The one in Rikers?”

“God bless him.” Mrs. Hoang crossed herself in the wrong order, cigarette trailing a smoky crucifix across her chest. “Listen to me: you look happier talking about crime than most people do talking about their own children. We all have to work until we die on this bitch of an earth, so if you can make money doing something you don’t hate, why would you let that go? Because your brother’s not around? Your brother’s a bastard. You don’t need him.”

“Hey.”

“I know you love him, but you’re a smart girl. You can love someone and know they’re a bastard. That’s my third husband, too. You’re tough. You’re a survivor. And you never take no for an answer. So why the hell are you waiting for an old woman to tell you that you can do it?”

“You’re right. Oh my god, you’re so right.” Jessie stood up, awkwardly smoothing out her pajama pants. Suddenly she was feeling hideously underdressed, embarrassed to have even gone outside of her apartment like this. She had a reputation to maintain. “Thank you so much for this. What time is it? I need to get moving. I have to get my life together.”

“Eh eh, hold on.” Mrs. Hoang snapped her fingers impatiently. “You need to fix my dishwasher first. It’s making that noise again. I can’t stand that shit.”

“Oh, fuck. Sorry. Hang on.” Jessie immediately redirected that energy back into the kitchen, yanking open the dishwasher and dropping straight to the floor. “Seriously, thank you so much. I really appreciate it when you let me pick your brain like this. You don’t happen to have a cringe pushover granddaughter, do you? I’d marry her in a heartbeat.”

“Nice try. All of my granddaughters are brilliant and mean.”

“God, that’s hot.”

“I’m very proud. I’ll pack up some leftovers for you, okay? I know you’ve been sad without your bastard brother around. It’s hard to eat when you’re sad. You should have come to see me sooner, so I could feed you.”

“I’m really sorry,” Jessie told her, and meant it. “I’ve been in kind of a funk, you know? But I’m trying to shake it off now. I promise.”

That was an understatement. What remained of the afternoon passed in a blur, with Jessie cramming in as much as she could to make up for lost time. She actually put away all of her clean clothes when they were done drying instead of leaving them to rot in the laundry basket, got dressed in a proper functioning outside outfit, and styled her hair and slapped on a little eyeliner and lip gloss for good measure. Then she went to see Isaac, the sweet Zimbabwean grad student across the hall. She’d been letting him use her Wi-Fi since he moved in and had knitted him a scarf to get him through the winter, and he’d always sworn he owed her a big favor for it while Jessie swore that he didn’t owe her anything at all.

Well, the times were a-changing, and Jessie was coming to collect. 

He was surprised to see her but didn’t refuse when she asked to go to the grocery store, or ask questions when she insisted on going to the fancy one that was well outside of their neighborhood. Jessie recommended, as delicately as possible, that he stay in the car while she shopped, and if he suspected that she’d stolen every single item in her overstuffed cart then he was polite enough not to say anything about it. It was a risky move, for sure, but if Jessie had learned anything as a child it was that even the worst circumstances seemed a little better when you at least had a full pantry, and she needed to save the last of her dwindling cash for bigger and better things. 

One-Eyed Polly’s was cash-only, after all, and somehow it always came back to One-Eyed Polly’s.  

According to family legend, everything had actually started there for Jessie, specifically in the middle stall of the women’s bathroom where her mother’s water broke. Yes, her mother really was the kind of bitch who was still hanging out at the local bad guy bar shooting the shit and hustling people at pool while she was nine months pregnant. Explains some things, doesn’t it? 

Anyway, Jesie spent her childhood obsessed with the idea of the place. It was a mythical location in her little kid brain, like the White House or the North Pole. God only knew what actually went on in there, but her imagination was filling in the gaps in the most lurid way possible. Polly’s was where Dad went to find work when every other lead dried up and the family was getting desperate, their saving grace. Dad would slink off to Polly’s when the power was about to get turned off, and he’d come back flush with confidence and enough money that the family wouldn’t have to worry for a few more months.

He never told Jessie much about Polly’s when she pressed, or anything else about his work. From Jonas she had gathered that their dad, gentle and bumbling as he was, had been an enforcer once, what Jonas scathingly called dumb muscle. It made sense, physically; Jonas and Dad were built exactly alike, tall and broad and sort of looming huge no matter what they did to seem smaller. But Dad didn’t do that anymore, not in years. These days he kept his head low, mostly serving as a driver, but he still wasn’t sharing any details. 

In young Jessie’s mind Polly’s was a nightclub like the ones on cop shows, dark rooms with throbbing music where sexily-dressed people writhed through smoke and neon lights. The villains would lean up against the walls, watching the crowd with a sharp gaze until they found just what they were looking for, and then they’d smile and beckon the lucky hench who’d caught their eye. You. And the crowds would part to let the chosen one through, everyone envious of whatever trait had been enough to deem them worthy. 

Admittedly it was hard to picture her deeply uncool dad in such a setting, but it must have worked out somehow. 

She didn’t actually get to see what Polly’s was like until she was thirteen, and that was still too early as far as Jonas was concerned. Before they went in he’d given her a whole lecture in the car, his knuckles white on the steering wheel even though they were parked.

“I’m going to walk you up to the bar and have you sit with Maudie, alright? She’ll take care of you.”

“Will she make me a drink?” Jessie asked. She was avoiding looking at her brother because she didn’t want him to see how excited she was, or that she’d been experimenting with eyeliner and mascara. He wouldn’t care that she was wearing makeup, but he would want to know where she got it and he’d probably guess that she’d also been experimenting with shoplifting. Best to annoy him on purpose so he had something else to be grouchy about.

It worked perfectly, and he made a sound of deep distress like he thought she was being serious. “You can’t drink. She’ll find you a chocolate milk or something, and then you’ll hang out with her until I’m done with my meeting. Don’t talk to anybody else, okay?”

“Why not?”

“Stranger danger, Jess, come on. People are freaks in here.”

“You’re here.”

“Because I have to be, alright? I don’t like it.” Jonas rubbed his eyes, looking tired. He’d looked tired since he moved out of their parents’ house, so much that Jessie worried about his health. She swore he was starting to get gray hairs, even though he’d only just turned twenty-one.

“What am I allowed to do?”

“Have a nice conversation with Maud. Tell her about how good you’re doing in school.”

“I’m not doing good in school.”

“Then you better come up with something nice to talk about, because you’re not doing anything else. Don’t even look at anybody too much, people get twitchy if you start doing that in case you’re a snitch.”

“Am I allowed to piss?”

He looked strained, the way he always did when she swore for no reason. “Have Maudie go with you.”

“Seriously? I’m not a baby, I can go to the bathroom by myself.” Jessie couldn’t even imagine what kind of trouble he thought she would get into there. In health class they’d said that people hung out in strange bathrooms to offer kids drugs, but that seemed stupid to Jessie. She would probably take a drug if it was free, just to see what it was like, but someone giving something away for no money seemed like a stupid idea to her even though she’d gotten detention for saying it.

Anyway, Maudie wouldn’t let something like that happen in her bar.

“I know you can wipe yourself, doofus, but you’re also gonna meet someone and start talking their ear off,” Jonas was saying. “Don’t do that.”

“Gaaaaawd. Why don’t you just leave me in the car if you’re so worried about it?”

“Because that’s child abuse. Any more questions?”

She could have asked questions forever, if he’d let her, but she was getting antsy and didn’t want to make him late, so she zipped her lips and shook her head. 

Jonas steered her inside with a big hand on her shoulder, his skin a little chilly even through his stupid little driving gloves. When they stepped through the door Jessie’s hopes momentarily soared, then immediately crashed and hit the ground like a dead seagull. Where was the pounding synth and the sex appeal? This was just a boring room with worn-out furniture and a pool table and completely normal lighting shining down on a scratch-up wooden floor. The most notable features were a jukebox blasting old people rock that made Jessie think of her dad and an ashtray smell that made her think of her mom.

Her brother steered her straight back to the bar, where a graying butch was waiting with a dusty can of grape soda that had clearly been dug up from somewhere deep in the bowels of the basement.

“Heya, tyke,” Maudie said, unsmiling.

“Heya, dyke,” Jessie said, with a shit-eating grin. She swung herself up onto one of the barstools, kicking her legs eagerly. “How’s it hanging?”

“Same old.” Maud turned to Jonas, somber. “Recluse is already waiting for you in the corner.”

Jessie swiveled all the way around her stool to have a look, and was delighted to see a menacing figure occupying the big booth jammed into a corner at the back of the room. She was wearing a lengthy trench coat that was bulging in the back, with long, bristling black spider limbs poking out at angles that didn’t seem like they should work. 

“Holy shit,” Jessie said, right before her brother spun her forcibly back around to look at Maud.

“Do not,” he said. “Please. I’ll be right back.”

He patted the top of her head and left, hunching his shoulders the way he did when he wanted to look even bigger and wider. Maudie sighed, long and slow.

“How’s school, kid?”

“Stupid. I wish it was summer.” 

“Yeah? What are you going to do when school’s out?”

“I don’t know. Watch TV. Who’s Recluse?”

“Trouble. Mind your own business.”

“Why’s Jonas talking to her?”

“How am I supposed to know?”

“Does she owe him money?”

“How about I put this pop in a margarita glass, huh? Would that be fun for you?”

“Can I have a little paper umbrella?”

“We don’t do those here. You get the fancy glass, take it or leave it.”

“Take it.”

The grape soda tasted musty, the carbonated fizz warm on her tongue, but Jessie sipped it anyway to be polite, swirling it the way she saw women do with wine glasses on TV. Her eyes were swiveling over the glass, trying to get a look at anyone else inside without being obvious about it. There was mostly nothing to see except a lot of sad, slouchy men who looked like her dad, but over at the dartboard there was a woman that Jessie wanted to look at forever.

There were some men with her, too, but she was clearly the center of the situation. Tall and leggy (in the normal way, not like Recluse), pale and dark-haired, face filled with all kinds of exciting piercings that Jessie hadn’t previously realized were even possible. Her outfit was all black, shiny black boots and a black cropped t-shirt and tight black pants that rode low enough to show off a skeletal stomach and jutting hips. God, even her belly button was pierced. Her whole body was like a knife, nothing but sharp edges and bits of metal. As Jessie watched, the pointy woman flipped a dart backwards over her own shoulder and hit a perfect bullseye, never even glancing at the board.

“Stop,” Maud said sharply.

“Stop what?”

“Looking. Thinking. Whatever you’re doing.”

Jessie leaned across the bar, conspiratorial. “Who is she?”

“Too old for you.”

“Maudie! That’s not what I meant!” Jessie said, blushing in a way that strongly suggested otherwise.

“Like hell it’s not.” Maud rolled her eyes, cut a glance over at the sharp woman, and spoke out of the corner of her mouth. “She calls herself Flechette, like machete. You’re not supposed to pronounce it like that, it’s French, but she’s mangling it on purpose. Dumbass. She’s been hustling those saps for the last fifteen minutes, taking them to the cleaners, and if I was dumb enough to gamble I'd say they’re about to start catching on.”

“Hey,” said one of the saps, right on time. “How the hell are you doing that?”

“She’s a freak!” one of his friends declared, which was followed pretty immediately by sounds of terrible pain.

Jessie didn’t turn around fast enough; hardly anyone could have. By the time she could see what was happening Flechette was already twirling a pool cue like a weapon and pulling off a series of improbably high kicks and sharp elbow jabs. The guys she’d been soundly beating were hardly amateurs—they all had the look of professional enforcers, dumb muscle to the bone—but their lumbering punches never had a chance to land.

Maud whistled, loud and sharp enough to split right through the fracas “That’s enough. You know there’s none of that bullshit in here.”

Flechette froze at once, except to deal one more swift kick to a man trying to drag himself up from the floor. She dropped the pool cue and held her hands up, wide open to show that she was done being a threat. It was a choice though, Jessie thought; this woman was entirely in charge of how and when she was dangerous. Maudie had always seemed unshakeable to Jessie, stubborn and stern as a stone statue, but what could she have actually done if Flechette didn’t want to leave? The baseball bat beneath the bar wouldn’t be much use against someone like that. 

It didn’t matter. Flechette flashed a smile like a shark and made for the door, pausing to throw a wink back at the bar. Maybe that was meant for Maud, a final little taunt to remember her by, but Jessie liked to imagine that it was meant for her. She was watching with her jaw dangling to the floor, not trying to make any secret of it. When Jessie told the story later she would always editorialize, hinting that Flechette must have sensed a kindred soul in her that day, spotted another villain’s star rising. 

In any case, nobody ever saw Flechette around Rustbelt again. From there on out she started climbing the ranks as a mercenary and assassin for hire, eventually working for A-list baddies all over the world. She upgraded from darts to razor-thin daggers that could find their mark from nearly any distance, thanks to her superhuman aim, and her services were sufficiently in demand that no prison could keep her contained for long. Somebody more powerful was always eager to break her out and have her killing in their name.  

In the meantime, the door of One-Eyed Polly’s slammed shut at the exact moment a giant hand gripped Jessie’s shoulder and made her jump.

“It’s time to go,” Jonas said, low and urgent. “Come on, Jess. Say thanks to Maudie.”

“I didn’t even finish my drink,” she said, knowing immediately that it was a stupid thing to say.

“Maybe next time.” Maud’s face was tight, and she was already whisking the margarita glass away. “Take care, kids.”

Jonas steered Jessie straight to his awful van, completely silent until he was back in the driver’s seat and gripping the steering wheel. He hadn’t taken off his gloves, but Jessie could imagine his knuckles turning white. That was a bad sign, considering the van wasn’t even running.

“I’m sorry you had to see that,” he said quietly.

Which confused Jessie for a moment, because she had assumed that she was in trouble. An apology was unexpected.

“It’s okay,” she assured him. “It was cool. She’s badass.”

“She’s not a role model. Nobody in there is.”

“What about Recluse?”

Jonas groaned, lowering his head to the steering wheel as well. “You shouldn’t even know her name. No, she’s not a role model. She’s a psychopath.”

“What about Maudie?”

“She’s on thin ice,” he said, which would normally make Jessie chuckle and point out haha, ice, but he clearly wasn’t in the mood. And she wasn’t either, because Jonas was treating her like a baby and that ticked her off, so she did something rude.

“Well, what about you?”

That made him raise his head, at least, and she immediately regretted pushing him, because Jonas looked more exhausted than she’d ever seen him in their entire life. He was getting dark hollows under his eyes, and he seemed skinnier and more raw beneath his baggy clothes every time she hugged him, and that hair that was going gray. 

“I don’t want to be there either, Jess. Don’t think for a second that I do, alright? This is pragmatism.”

“What does that mean? Come on, I’m failing English. I don’t know words.”

He reached into his jacket and withdrew a fat wad of bills clipped together, slapping them down on the center console. It wasn’t forceful, not enough to make Jessie cringe or scare her in any way—he was always careful about that, conscientious to be gentle with her since he had always been so much older and bigger. But she could tell he wanted to make a point about it.

“It means that I’m being smart and doing the thing that will make me the most possible money, even though it sucks.”

“Why, though?” Jessie pressed. “You don’t have to do it if you hate it so much.”

“Jess, come on. I’m trying to take care of you, okay? Dropping off groceries every week is expensive, and driving you around is expensive, and I’m…” He paused, rubbed a hand over his eyes. “Look, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about this. I didn’t want to bring it up too soon, in case it didn’t pan out, but what if you came to stay with me instead of Mom and Dad?”

Her heart skipped, and she immediately clamped down on that feeling before she could get too excited. She had to play it cool. “But you said I’m never allowed to visit your place.”

“Well, I’d have to get a new place. With no housemates, so I’d have to pay the rent and security deposit and everything by myself because it would be just me and you. But I think I could do it.”

Jessie swallowed hard. “Do Mom and Dad know?”

“No. But I think I could make them understand, if it was what you really wanted. And that’s another thing I’m saving up for, getting a lawyer if they try to fight about it. So that I could legally adopt you or something, if I have to. If you want me to.”

“Adopt me?” Jessie repeated. It sounded silly, thinking of Jonas as her parent instead of her brother. He was too young to be her dad. But it made sense, didn’t it? Mom made sure she had food and clothes and all that, but Jessie had never felt like her mom loved or even her. Dad loved her plenty, but he was responsible for losing all their money and getting the lights shut off at least as often as he was responsible for fixing it. Jonas was the only one who had ever managed to love her and take care of her. 

“If you want,” he said again. She’d never seen him so nervous. “You don’t have to. But I know Mom and Dad have been getting worse, and I don’t want you to have to stay there if you don’t want to. You should feel safe at home. And I’ve never forgotten what you said that night at the park. I shouldn’t have left you alone.”

She knew exactly what he meant; there was only one night at the park for them. The night they’d been eating ice cream sandwiches and watching fireflies when the sky opened up, when time slowed to almost nothing and snapped back to a different world, a world where her brother was a walking blizzard. 

“It’s okay,” Jessie told him, even though it sort of wasn’t. She’d gotten used to it. “But I would. I’d live with you. It’d be cool.”

Jonas didn’t smile often or easily, but right then he looked happier and more relieved then she’d ever seen. Maybe even excited, like he had been worried she would say no and pick their parents over him. “Okay. Yeah. We’ll make it happen, Jess. I’ve been saving up as much as I can, and I think I’m close. We won’t be anywhere very nice, but I’ll find us somewhere. We’ll make it happen, okay?”

Jessie’s heart was racing, all the excitement of One-Eyed Polly’s already forgotten in light of this new development. She had to make sure this was for real, had to make this as close to legally binding as she could. “You promise?” 

He extended a little finger and she grinned, tied their pinkies together to seal the promise like they had since she was little.

“I promise,” he said. “You and me against the world.”

[zero-is-nebulous]

Uuuh here's my art dump for the reverse omens au I made

I can't remember which artist came up with the moth demon Aziraphale but credit goes to them, I just liked it and decided to run with it (I'll see If I can find them to drop a name sometime l8r)

Text ver under the cut

Aziraphale - really a quite terrible demon (original temptor)

Moth broach

Walking stick

Same outfit p much

Hair pattern silly

Majic man style coat

Eyes...

Moth antenna

Raphael - bored Archangel, human expert and healer (Crowley)

Outcast Archangel

Azi's pocket watch

Moth pendant

Devious smirk

How 2 draw skinny jeans?

Shoes...

Snake tattoo

(Text pages at the end, typed out below)

The story goes like this...

Aziraphale, thinking that keeping the diffrent between right/wrong from life is silly. He believes it's the right thing to do to introduce it to the humans. He is past looking to the all-mighty for morality, and really just does what he thinks is right. He disguises himself as an angel to offer the fruit to Adam + eve, and then discorporates the angel of the Eastern gate (unnamed angel, soon to be demoted for being bested so easily) to give the humans their flaming sword. He watches them go from the top of the Eastern gate, now non-disguised

Archangel Raphael is bored, hating how heaven is run but not wanting to ask questions after the fall of their last 'example'. He loves his stars, and wishes the world would be as interesting as them. He often visits the garden, so he sees Aziraphale on the wall and, bored, goes to be nosey

Crowley: the principality for this post taking a break?

Aziraphale: looks it, doesn't it? Whoever they were, they did quite an awful job. The humans are already a mile beyond the wall. Perhaps heaven is doing it all wrong then, hm?

It turns out, demons are quite talkative. And interesting

Crowley: hm, so you're saying you don't know what happened here?

Aziraphale: not a single clue. I suppose that's to be expected though, no?

Crowley: oh? What makes you say that?

Aziraphale: well, it's as she said. I'm not quite meant to ask questions. Her plan is ineffable, after all

Crowley: ineffable?

Aziraphale: quite. Silly, isn't it?

Crowley: I never said a thing, uh,

Aziraphale: Aziraphale

Crowley: Aziraphale

Crowley: how tf did u get captured by the Spanish inquisition?

(Dressed 2 the nines)

Crowley: I'm gonna myrical u outa this bc I have a heavenly duty but let it be known I think you're one of the dumbest motherfuckers I have ever met

Aziraphale: teehee

(No longer a fashion icon)

Crowley: dramatic ass demon

Sorry this is so terribly layed out tumblr kept changing it after I posted

[sentofight]

"Um…" it's a hesitant start when the conversation topic trickles down into nothing, perhaps purposefully so as their responses became shorter. Something seemed to be on her mind, and as such, that something ended up gnawing on their mind. Another few seconds pass, unsure of how to word their concern, if they should word their concern, but in the end, they take a breath. "Are you alright…? You've been looking at your phone a lot, and you look kind of restless… If there's anyplace you need to be then it's fine with me if you go there, don't worry about me. But…if it's something else, then I don't mind listening. As long as you are fine with sharing, of course." ( HELLO YEONG

Oh, where to begin? The bombing of her family house? losing the last of her family? knowing something she wish she didn't know? Realizing that her life could be ... fake?

Did ... grandma loved me? Did she really loved me like her own? or was it the guilt of what she had done to me? Caleb! What about him? Did he know? Was his death in vain, too? All these questions keep prying on her mind the moment she let her guards down.

What is she?

Even Zayne kept that a secret from her.

Who can she really trust?

No ... she is too cruel on them if she thought they never loved her or cared for her. She knows it is true. No one can fake that much love she felt for the past what 8 years or more? Grandma raised her like she was her own and Caleb was there as her irreplaceable big brother. Zayne, well he was there for some part of her childhood then their fates decided a little detour before they come back into each other's life.

Digging into what had happened was the only thing that kept the gears in her mind working. Who and why would someone deliberately bomb her house. All clues lead to one .... one and only--Onychinus. If she is going to get answers then the best way is to find their leader and well, extract her answers from him. one way or another.

She was waiting for a confirmation from one famous artist to take her into where she could find more about Onychinus when Akira's voice rang to snap her out of her trance.

"--Ah! Oh, um ... sorry," hiding her phone into her pocket, she clasped her hands tightly. What was she doing ... she was out with a friend and look at her, ruining the mood.

"Sorry, you were kind to arrange this trip and here am I, thinking of something else beside how to eat these wonderful velvet cakes!" there was a forced grin plastered on her face. A blind person would tell how much she is trying to force a happy and excited vibe.

There is no need for more people to get involved. She didn't even tell Tara about this not even Jena, her boss. Akira is a civilian and what would do him if he learned about this? He'll just worry endlessly about her. I mean ... he is now but the less he know the better. In case she failed, that's a probability, he wouldn't be in danger.

"Come on! Let's eat and continue with the course, yes? We still got uuuh... the cat hat tricks shop to see! Aren't you excited? I heard that the cat cafe in the market district is actually there, too! Miser Vilho brought some of his cats into this magic show! aaaa!!! I hope he brought Vitalis~ He does not like me for some reason but I like him~ hehehe."

unprompted | <3 i love you <3 | @flovverworks

[mrsfrecklesmarauders]

Sirius was so excited to move in with Remus. Suddenly everything felt real. It was happening. Sirius was going to have his own place. And he was going to share it with the love of his life. It was even more exciting that it was Alphard's old apartment. How many times Sirius wished he lived like his Uncle. It that a flat full of history, where so many things and parties had happened. Alphard surely had many memories there. Now it was Sirius' turn to make some more.

Sirius had been scared of leaving Hogwarts and not seeing his friends everyday. Scared of the Marauders breaking up. But Sirius wasn't scared anymore. Growing up didn't sound so bad actually.

"I'm really going to miss you, love"

Euphemia said as she helped Sirius pack. It had been incredible to spend a few years at The Potters. They had made Sirius feel welcome. They had treated him as part of the family. With The Potters, Sirius felt the love and care he hadn't received from his own parents. And now it was bittersweet to leave. But Sirius had to. He didn't want to be a burden anymore. Not matter what Effie or Monty said, Sirius wasn't actually their son.

"I'm going to miss you too, Effie" Sirius said, overwhelmed by Effie's words.

"You know... This will always be your home" Euphemia smiled "No matter what"

Sirius looked away and kept packing. Otherwise he was going to cry.

"Thank you very much for everything. I really loved living here for a while"

Sirius wanted to hug her. Effie had been so patient. She had listened to Sirius. She had comprehended him. With Effie, Sirius knew how it was to actually have a mother.

Sirius' body ached for a hug. Especially if Effie smiled at him like that. But Sirius was containing himself.

"It's definitely not fair!"

Luckily James crossed the door interrupting them.

"I wish I could move in with Lily" James sighed "But she says it is too soon..." he added "Is that my hoodie?"

Sirius grabbed it.

"It's mine now"

"Well it is too soon, James" Effie said, referring to the other thing "And it's different. Sirius is just moving in with his friend. Not his girlfriend"

Sirius was frozen. He hadn't had the opportunity to tell The Potters about him and Remus. Sirius actually didn't know how. Their opinion was very important to him. And it had been hard to tell his friends and the people his age. He imagined It would be worse with adults.

Sirius and James looked between each other.

Maybe this was the opportunity to tell Effie. When Sirius told her about his Uncle Alphard, she didn't judge. Perhaps she would take it well.

"Actually... Effie..."

"Yeah... Sirius' actual girlfriend is disappointed it is not her Sirius is moving in with"

James said it so quickly that Sirius didn't have time to stop him. And when he said it, Sirius was shocked.

Effie looked between the two.

"Actual girlfriend?" she looked at Sirius "Are you dating someone, love?"

Sirius was going to kill James Potter.

"Ehhmm..."

"Yeah Marlene..." James nodded nervously.

"Marlene McKinnon?" Effie asked.

"Eh... We are just getting to know each other better" Sirius explained nervously as well.

Fuck. Sirius had been willing to tell Effie about Remus but James had fucked it up. Now Effie was smiling so widely that Sirius didn't want to break the spell.

"That's lovely!" Effie exclaimed happily "Marlene is such a good girl. I've known her since she was little... I always thought she would end up with James"

Marlene was an absolute lesbian.

"Eew... I mean I'm in love with Lily" James said trying to avoid Sirius' intense gaze.

"But I guess the heart wants what it wants" Effie smiled.

Sirius faked a smile.

"Uuuh!..." Effie added "How about we invite your girls for dinner this weekend?"

"What?" James asked.

"Yeah I was planning to invite sweet Lily over" Effie added "Why not invite Marlene since she is with Sirius?"

"I... I don't think..."

"Lovely!" James screamed "Mummy... I am hungry. Can you tell Maaike to prepare us something?"

"For God sake's, James. Why don't you tell her yourself?" Effie tutted.

James picked up a random clothing from the floor.

"I'm helping Sirius pack"

"Bloody hell, this kid"

Effie buffed with her hands on her hips. But she left the room but not before giving Sirius a big smile. Sirius smiled back.

When Effie was gone, Sirius have James a hateful look.

"What the fuck, Potter?" Sirius snapped "Marlene?"

"I panicked!"

"Marlene is a lesbian!!" Sirius said as James hushed him "And I am with Remus... I am moving in with him... I love him"

"Okay..." James tried to calm Sirius down. He closed the door so they could speak more freely.

"I know my parents pretty well...." James sighed "And they are good people and excellent parents... But they are a bit old fashioned"

Sirius was surprised.

"What do you mean?"

James looked down.

"They grew up in a different time... They are a bit old..."

Sirius rolled his eyes "They are fine"

"You haven't heard them talking about gay people" James added embarrassed.

"What have they said about gay people?" Sirius asked.

"It's mostly Fleamont..." James explained, now sitting down in Sirius' bed "He doesn't particularly fancy seeing boys holding hands on the street or men acting feminine.. He gets nervous around all that. He doesn't say anything. He just tenses... I've seen it"

Sirius sat down as well, mainly to process what he was hearing.

"And Effie just expects the boy and girl romance only. She has a misconception of what being gay actually is. The only gays she knows are the ones from salons" James sighed "I've been impartial about the subject but ever since Marlene came out and you and Remus started dating... I notice these things more. I get more pissed about them.... I'm sorry. I am just protecting you. I don't want you to be upset about how they would react"

Sirius was silent. It wasn't fair. James was open about his relationship with Lily. And his parents even teased him about it. But Sirius couldn't be honest about who he actually fancied.

Sirius was tired of hiding away. Sirius was tired of constantly being worried about other people's opinions. At Hogwarts Sirius was seen as a completely new person since people discovered he was dating Remus. Sirius was tired of giving explanations about his sexuality, even though Sirius didn't know it himself.  And expected to be weak and feminine only because he fancied a boy.

Sirius loved being with Remus. He was absolutely in love him. But how hard it was to actually date him. Only because they were both boys.

"We are going to find a way to tell them, Pads" James added with a worried expression "I promise"

Sirius sighed "It's okay..." It really wasn't "I just don't know who is going to be more angry with you, Prongsie, Remus or Marlene?"

************

"James did what???!?"

Remus wasn't happy when Sirius told him the news over the phone later that night.

"I was going to tell them, Moony" Sirius said "But apparently, even The Potters are homophobic... Nobody is safe"

Remus sighed.

"They are very important to you, Sirius" he said "If you want to tell them, you should. Even if they don't agree. They have to know every part of you in order to fully accept you"

"James says we are going to drop the bomb tomorrow at dinner" Sirius explained "He is going to help me. We are going to easy the way in with lots of wine for Mr. and Mrs. Potter..."

Remus chuckled.

"You need to be there, Moons"

"I thought this was a couples' dinner night?"

"You are my actual boyfriend. And I want you to be there" Sirius said "So I can hold your hand when I tell Effie and Monty who I am actually head over heels for.... And brag about it"

"I love how confident you are getting... And it's making me horny"

Sirius chuckled.

"Love you, Pads"

Sirius' heart skipped a beat everytime Remus said it. Sirius loved Remus so much, he didn't understand why this was seen as a crime, as a bad thing. It didn't matter that Remus was a boy. Actually it didn't matter what gender Remus was. Sirius was in love with Remus Lupin.

And that was it.

"I love you too" Sirius said "Does this mean you are coming?"

Remus laughed and Sirius smiled, wishing he could be next to Remus and kiss the side of his mouth while he laughed. It was his favorite thing to do.

"If you want me there, then I'll be there"

Sirius smiled.

*******************

Fleamont finished telling his story, and everyone laughed and clapped. Fleamont always had the best stories to tell. They weren't only interesting, but it was the way he told them that made them funny. He made voices and all. James definitely got Monty's sense of humor.

But Sirius couldn't enjoy it. Because he was nervous. He was trying to find the right moment to stand up and tell Effie and Monty the truth. But he never dared. Effie kept looking between Sirius and Marlene and smiling. This was so hard.

"Is it okay that I invited Remus?" Sirius had asked when dinner started.

"Oh no problem, love" Effie answered smiling at Remus "The more the merrier" she said. Sirius almost grabbed Remus' hand in front of her

"Is Marlene coming?" she asked and Sirius' stopped. Remus was sad.

"She is coming later"

Wasn't it obvious that the person he wanted here was right next to him? The whole time Sirius hadn't even looked at Marlene. Marlene was only his friend. And she was a lesbian.

"Sirius... Hey, Sirius!!"

Sirius only reacted when Remus tapped his shoulder.

"What?"

"I was asking you the smash potatoes, you freaking.... I mean, are you deaf?"

Marlene wasn't acting particularly as Sirius' lover. And The Potters were not stupid.

Sirius passed the bowl to Marlene.

"Thank you..." she smiled "You wanker" she added whispering.

James giggled nervously and stuffed more food in his mouth.

"The food is great" he said with his mouth full "Is so great, isn't it?"

James was even more nervous than Sirius.

"Yeah..." Lily smiled, changing the subject "Is this an Arabic dish, Effie?"

"Yeah it is actually..."

As Effie began explaining, Sirius leaned to whisper in Remus' ear.

"I'm sweating... I think even my genitals are sweating"

"Stop saying things to make me horny"

Sirius chuckled. They both giggled silently.

"I'm nervous too" Remus added "Here... Hold my hand"

Sirius grabbed Remus' hand under the table. Fingers intertwined. It was incredible how Remus made Sirius' heart beat fast but at the same time, he made him feel more calm.

"They are going to accept us"

Sirius sighed.

"Because you make me happy"

Remus smiled.

"And you make me happy"

"So Marlene..." Effie said, gaining the attention towards her "How long have you and Sirius been dating?"

Sirius dropped Remus' hand out of instinct. Marlene chocked with her food. Then she laughed.

"Oh no Sirius and I...." she shook her head.

"They are friends trying to figure things out!" James exclaimed and then chunked a gulp of water.

Marlene narrowed her eyes. She looked between Sirius, Remus and James confused. Sirius squeezed Remus' hand harder.

"Wait... Is this why I am here?" Marlene asked

So she didn't know?

"Oh my God!"

"Didn't James explain it to you?" Sirius asked. James had been the one to call Marlene.

"No... No he didn't..."

All eyes went to James. His cheeks were full of food and he stopped chewing when he noticed. Lily sighed beside him.

"Okay... What is going on?" Fleamont raised an eyebrow.

"What? Nothing..." Sirius tried to smile.

"We might be old but we are not stupid" Effie tutted "Would you tell us what is happening?"

Nobody moved or said anything for a few seconds. Sirius knew he had to say something but he was kind of frozen. He was still squeezing Remus' hand.

James swallowed his food. And he stood.

"Okay... God dammit. I lied... I lied... I said so many things... I... This is all on me... Okay?"

Sirius rised from his chair without thinking about it.

"No, Prongs.... It is me who has to explain this"

Effie and Monty turned their eyes towards Sirius. And he felt a knot on his throat.

Sirius looked at Remus and he gave him such a comforting smile that Sirius felt more confident.

"I... I am not dating Marlene..." Sirius started carefully "I am actually... I am dating Remus..."

It was pure silence after that. It felt like time stopped for second. Effie was observing them in a serious expression. And Fleamont was thinking of what to say. Everything was awkward until Marlene added.

"And I am... into girls, by the way..."

"Oh" Effie smiled embarrassed "Why didn't you tell us that? Why did you lie?"

"To be fair, I didn't know this was happening..." Marlene shrugged "I just came here for the delicious food"

"It was me" James added "I lied for them..."

"Why did you do that?" Fleamont asked.

"Because I didn't know how you were going to react" James looked down embarrassed "You are a bit old fashioned"

"Are you calling me old?" Fleamont asked, which made everyone laugh breaking the tension.

"You're kind of old" James whispered.

"Look how disrespectful your son is, Effie" Fleamont tutted.

Effie smiled.

"To be honest we've been suspecting about Sirius and Remus for quite a long time now"

Fleamont nodded to confirm it.

"Really?" Sirius asked.

"You shared beds everytime Remus stayed here, your face lit up everytime you talked about him, you were closer, the two of you...you invited him tonight.. I kept telling Monty there was something between you two"

"Effie insisted on making this dinner party to uncover the truth" Fleamont added.

Sirius and Remus smiled embarrassed.

"What we didn't expect was Marlene liking.... Liking girls" Effie added.

Marlene's cheeks turned red.

"I do tend to give surprises" she smiled.

"So what do you think?" Sirius asked curiously "About me and Remus... Do you fancy the idea?"

Effie and Monty looked between each other.

Yes, they knew about them but it didn't mean they accepted it.

"You do tend to be homophobic" James added.

"James..." Lily protested.

"It's true"

"Homo... What?" Fleamont asked.

"It means people that hate on gay people" Remus explained "Not that you are... Or anything"

Fleamont sighed "I have to admit I am new with this whole thing. Sometimes I see it as an odd thing... It is because I am not used to seeing... that kind of people... as often... Effie is more open about it"

"The important thing is that you are happy, loves. No matter who you date" Effie smiled "Sorry if we ever made you feel bad or unwanted..."

Remus shook his head.

"I've always felt welcomed here, Mr. and Mrs. Potter"

"Effie and Monty, please"

"Effie and Monty..." Remus smiled embarrassed "Sirius... Sirius loves you as if you were his parents..." Remus smiled at Sirius ". So impressing you is not only important to him. But to me as well. And I just want to let you know that I love him, and I am not going to hurt him. So you don't need to worry about it...."

How could someone be so perfect and make Sirius feel so many things at the same time? Remus hadn't spoken much tonight. But everything he had said had been perfect. And it felt incredible. Sirius knew he could never properly introduce Remus to his real parents. But this, what Remus had said had been the perfect thing he could've said to them. Fortunately Effie and Monty were the closest thing Sirius had to parents.

So Sirius kissed Remus now. He couldn't take it anymore. And he had been wanting to do that all night.

"Oh!" Effie exclaimed.

Fleamont cleared his throat uncomfortably.

"Surely times have changed" he said.

Sirius broke apart embarrassed.

"Sorry"

Remus was smiling. Then Sirius smiled. And everyone smiled. They slowly began laughing. Until everything felt normal again and everything was fine.

"Not to be homophobic or anything but it is quite disgusting when you do that" Marlene said.

"I think it is adorable" Lily smiled.

"I prefer that than James drooling for Lily all the time" Fleamont said making everyone laugh.

Lily blushed embarrassed.

"Oh shut up, old man" James protested.

"You disrespectful brat..." Fleamont tutted.

Sirius was so happy and relaxed now. He could be free with Remus. At least around The Potters. Which was good, because he was planning on visit them a lot.

Sirius grabbed Remus' hand, on top of the table now and he felt a rush of adrenaline. It felt so good.

Remus smiled.

"I love you" he mouthed.

Sirius smiled too.

"Love you more"

Remus looked so happy as well. They had hidden for so long. This was a relief.

"Now that we know about you two..." Effie said "we will have to talk about boundaries, and that sharing of beds..."

Sirius and Remus weren't the only ones that went red. Fleamont did it as well. And he moved in his seat uncomfortably. Perhaps it would take him some time to get used to it. But he was trying. He was definitely not like Orion.

"Effie, we are living together..."

Effie gapsed "And we definitely have to chat about that..."

Remus laughed. Sirius smiled because he was happy. His real parents would never accept Remus. They didn't even care who he dated and what made him happy as long as it didn't stain the Family name. Too late for that. Effie and Monty were like parents to Sirius. Sirius was happy that at least them accepted him for who he was. And that was more than enough.

[rapha-reads]

The Star Beast

[SPOILERS AHEAD]

DOCTOR WHO SAID NONBINARY RIGHTS AND GENDER NONCONFORMING RULES!!!!!!!!

So. DoctorDonna is BACK. With a trans daughter, an absolutely wholesome husband, and a mellowed out mother!!!! What a BLAST that was, seeing her on screen again! It's what she deserves! FIFTEEN YEARS we've been asking justice for Donna Noble, and RTD delivered!!!!

(Also, is it me, or has Catherine Tate NOT aged at all?)

I'm super excited, that first special episode was awesome.

The Meep was terrifying and hilarious, even when they were being all cute, my very first reaction was "yeah, no, don't trust". Shoutout to Miriam Margolyes for the voice acting, that was perfect!

I loved that the Wrarth Warriors were so polite and official posh, with their look, it was super funny and interesting to watch and hear.

Oh, shoutout to our new UNIT liaison officer, Science Advisor 56 Shirley Anne Bingham! She sounds like the life of the party. I hope we get more of her (and her badass wheelchair).

I hope we get to see Wilf, it's so good that he's still alive, Bernard Cribbins is missed.

"Something that a male-presenting Time Lord wouldn't know to do" sent me OFF, lmao, also thank you RTD for all the references to Thirteenth, she WAS amazing and she deserves to be remembered.

Rose Noble is amazing and precious. She's going to grow up and be a brilliant, badass, amazing woman. That moment when she tells the Meep she feels lonely because she feels different hit right in the feels. Also her face when the stupid schoolboys bully her and call her deadname. [Personal aside: I argued with my mother today in amongst other things because she insists on calling me my full name version, which I don't like, instead of the diminutive, which is my chosen name - and she said "I named you Raphaelle, with the 'elle' ('she' in French, which, nope) at the end, very important", and that made me flinch so hard; please don't gender me, it's Rapha and that's it. Anyway, I'm glad to see more trans and nonbinary rep, especially in Doctor Who.]

Moving on.

If I had a nickel for every time the Doctor questioned "why this face", I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.

DAVID TENNANT. Welcome back, Sir! I have to admit something: when everyone and especially people who kept shitting on Twelfth and Thirteenth got all excited about David Tennant coming back, I got a bit disheartened, because I felt (and a lot of people explicitly said) that it would overshadow and discard Capaldi's excellent work and Jodie's run, and I wasn't as excited about David as most people. BUT I gotta admit it: it is AMAZING to see David back in action as the Doctor, with the added weight of the Doctor's past three regenerations! He knows the character, he knows the history, he knows the universe, and it SHOWS. I love that he's older, wiser, grizzlier, more prudent, they got burn so many times, and yet still ridiculous, goofy, prone to fondness and kind to his bones... Yeah, that's the Doctor again.

And now onto the real star, the one true MVP... DONNA NOBLE. Most important woman in the universe. Brilliant, sassy Donna!!!! I looooove that amnesiac Donna gave away the money, and that it's the first thing she rails against when she gets all her memories back. It's just. Prime Donna stuff. All at once incredibly kind and driven to help, but also down to earth and practical. Yeah, yeah, helping others, of course, that's the priority, but also, damn it, take care of myself too, ya know? She's SO relatable!! Love that she adores her daughter and that's her calling. Remember when she felt so lost and aimless? Now she's got her objective: being a mother to an amazing daughter. Oh, and, uuuh.... Wrecking the Tardis every time she sets foot in it. Oops! Can't wait to see where they land!

Oh, oh, the Tardis! Not sure I'm a fan of the new design, tbh. Too white, too empty. I hope she's not going to stay like this too long. Pretty sure it won't, given that she's already on fire.

And on the last thing for this first episode: I do hope we're getting actual ties-in with the 60 years history...

Onto Wild Blue Yonder!

[cyberpunk-20xx]

Thinking of how Kerry's portrayed as much more openminded and flamboyant in comparison to Johnny but...Actually he's got more than a little bias now I think about it. He has the potential of being this glamourous queer but uuuh yeah no not yet in canon.

Both he and Johnny look down on Lazrpop like typical macho rocker guys do on any electronic music that sounds too peppy/not gritty enough

Like

I believed it was bcus lazrpop was more of a sellout music at first but that makes no sense

Kerry is the living proof that you can absolutely do rock and be a sellout

And then there's Judy, who's a fan of Lazrpunk. We're even reminded of Johnny's disdain about it when he comments on it, completely ignoring the paradox- why would a Mox like something that is actually just corpo shit? I think this is yet another time where Johnny underestimates stuff that he just doesn't relate to.

Anyway, the artwork he reacts to in her room is an obvious reference to Daft Punk. Who are the furthest away from capitalist that a musical band can be these days, honestly. I don't think that reference is accidental.

So I'm kinda running with the idea that Kerry really just... Kept on hating on stuff like what the US Cracks did because he took it at face value, which is really typical of the rocker type that doesn't question the hypermasculinized growths in what rock is.

Kind of like dudebros who hated on PONPONPON when it first came out cus it was too girly for their taste.

And looking at everything we see happening to Kerry when we meet him, it's obvious he was so deep in shit he had blinders on. He keeps spiraling, his choices are questionable at best, even if the outcomes are good if we help him.

I love that about him. Makes me so fucking soft, in fact.

I love that we get to meet him so jaded when he seemed so much softer in Johnny's memories. Makes me believe that this is part of how Johnny impacted him, even in death, but even moreso, that this is a man corrupted but still standing. Just like Rogue, the reason why Kerry wasn't crushed by Night City is because he played by the rules, losing a part of himself, but gods at least he's still here.

Barely, but still.

And then we see him believe again as V and the Us Cracks help him to, which gives him new perspectives. Because Kerry always had power, even moreso once he becomes filthy rich, but he also lost the meaning in most of his life. A change of pace and style tends to help with that. Idk look

[intrepidradish]

Ooooh hell let's talk about Grayza too. She's awful! I don't know which writer left the table for this character to escape containment without a single sympathetic angle. It's like a bunch of men brainstormed for 5 minutes on what an example of a fascist sexually liberated woman would look like and created a tits out woman with pencil thin brows. (Being that I know a few doms with pencil thin brows even twenty years after the 00s, that's the only accurate part of her portrayal and it does make my blood run cold. Nice work.)

But let's humor the concept for a moment, they didn't even commit to the bit. This is Farscape! The definition of committing to the bit. If Grayza is a dominant woman that seduces her underlings with the pheromone trope, than how come she doesn't have Meeklo in a speedo? How come everyone is fully clothed? If we're going to reference the raunchy, fear-of-powerful-woman, sci fi tropes here, how come she doesn't carry a whip? How come she's not attended to by sexually slaves? Literal zombies, yaknow?

They could have really taken it up a notch. She could have been a horse girl (references the female cop tropes too). Jim Henson alien horse puppets? The fucking balls of a woman to have a huge pet on a command carrier. She could've delivered her weird pheromone through a heel spur (foot fetish). She could've had her male slaves dressed for ponyplay. She could've seduced women too. She could've had like vacuum beds and kept her slaves organized for her whims. Like jeezus. Just commit to the bit.

But if we don't humor the idea of Grayza, what's her deal? Okay, so in the 60s when a lot of men were writing science fiction stories, rape and women were a pretty oft talked about phenomena. A lot of these stories theorized that in a sexually free society, where women stopped being so fucking frigid, rape simply wouldn't exist. MAGIC SPARKLES. Because, of course, in the minds of some dudes, sexual violence simply doesn't happen to men (wrong) and the issue with rape is not an issue of autonomy but an issue of culture (also wrong). We have rape in our society because we aren't free thinking enough about fucking everyone nasty. Uh-huh. Okay. Very wrong.

Right, so this is actually fun stuff to reference in modern sci fi because it is so laughably stupid. But Farscape doesn't really tackle it. It only introduces it, and then drops it entirely. In the first episode of season 4, Chiana finds Crichton on Elac, and admits that she tested her future sight by gambling, was caught, brutalized, and raped. Oh. That's terrible! Crichton doesn't really care. Okay. Hm. The only time this is referenced again is when Chiana is acting aggressive to others and Crichton is like "oh give her some space." ... Okay. Well, I find that vaguely disappointing of everyone.

This rolls into Arnessk, which is all about rape. Crichton is raped that's pretty clear. I've spoken a little about Scorpius's abuse too. I don't think people view Grayza's treatment of him as rape, but in the kink community, just because someone likes torture and pain doesn't mean they enjoy it from everyone. I think its pretty sad that Scorpius gets tortured, is like 'this is fine because I'm enjoying it', and then he gets all his motor controls taken away with drugs. I'm not sure I can call it rape, but it is a violation, and it can be considered a sexual one knowing that he often experiences pleasure from pain. I know the kink aspect gets confusing for some people, because 'well he said he liked it' but... I also think Scorpius makes do with terrible situations and has his entire life. Just because someone can manage trauma (can he? has he) doesn't mean he should continue to experience it.

Uuuh, so. Crichton also doesn't get any time to process his rape...at all...? He gets a drug from Noranti to forget about Aeryn, but... wouldn't it make more sense, from a storytelling point of view, to interweave that harrowing experience with Grayza into why he might be distant from Aeryn? Instead, maybe he's drugging himself to cope? Instead, it's just ignored, and the fear Crichton had for Scorpius (his abuses are numerous) is never the same fear he has for Grayza (always deferring to the fear of getting caught but never the fear of having his mind taken away).

We never get much insight into Scorpius, since he doesn't share feelings, but it's also a constant theme in this season that he exposes himself to pain, bad situations, death because he can handle it. Even when those situations do hurt him (and not in like a sexy fun way either). No one questions this. It is seen as pretty helpful...*narrows eyes*

In Twice Shy, a woman who is being sexually abused by traders is taken on Moya. It turns out she's another spider lady, and she's eating people. This is a weird one too. This is also the only time Chiana kisses another woman (do it more, you cowards). The sexual victim turned dangerous predator is another one of those old pulp fiction tropes. Just a disappointing episode when viewed in this transparent light. The spider dies, etc etc.

Throughout all of this, Grayza doesn't get any more depth. She's seen using Braca a few times. She doesn't even have sex with him, just lies that they did, but why? Why. Why. Why. Make her scary or something? Do anything with her. But no.

Lots of thoughts this morning.

[universallytravelerpirate]

ok! kinda late to this but I still wanna do it so...

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)? mmmmm not gonna lie, the pissa brainrot is very powerful, my n1 bbg qMissa of course, with qPhil a comfortable n2 (also pepito, love how people write Pepito)

lighter or matches? I don't really care... but if I have to choose then those lighters with very fun designs!

do you leave the window open at night? depends on the time of the year, right now yes I do, but when autumn and winter come then no

which cryptyd being do you believe in? I don't really believe in any, but my grandparents say they heard La Llorona once!

what color are your eyes? Brown

why did you do that? because its funny. Or I was lazy and didn't think of the consecuences long term.

hair-ties or scrunchies? tf is a scrunchies. OK that is just a hair-tie but fancy, so I guess any?

how many water bottles are in your room right now? 1, not in use tho, the water tastes like metal blegh.

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee? I don't drink coffee, so I'm gonna say cold chocomilk.

would you slaughter the rich? depends on where you draw the line

favorite extracurricular activity? looking at funny man in my screen talk gibberish

what kind of day is it? a lot of clouds, but sunny at the same time :) I like it

when was the last time you ate? literally 2 minutes ago, yummy cake

do you love the smell of earth after it rains? yeeeeeee

are you a parent? (all answers qualify) Lots of Cats (help/j)

can you drive? not yet, but I did drive a moped once, pretty fun

are you farsighted or nearsighted? only person in my house that doesn't use glasses letsgooo B)

what hair products do you use? shampoo and condicioner, the usual

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails? oooooh I would love to

do you say soda or pop? Soda

something you’ve kept since childhood? a lot of my plushies and a book

what type of person are you? uuuh kid that always sits near a window and looks deep in thought, but in reality is just playing with dolls in their head

how do you feel about chilly weather? yep, awesome, love it, 10/10

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing? seeing the stars in silent and from time to time I'll say something random

perfume/body spray or lotion? perfume, but I don't usually use it

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times? a lot of weird shit I say to random people (also the tiem I showed helluva boss to my teacher lol safe to say she did not like it)

about how many hours of sleep did you get? uuuuuuuh 7+? no idea

do you wear a mask? nope

how do you like your shower water? hot, but not boiling

is there dishes in your room? 1 bowl and spoon

what type of music keeps you grounded? I usually hear music to be in my head or as bakground, so no idea

do you have a favorite towel? no... but I do have a favourite blanket!

the last adventure you’ve been on? my exams finally are over!! I consider that an adventure with how long it took

is there a song you know every word to by heart? uuuh maybe "from now on" from the gratest showman

what’s your timezone? Summer Central European Time

how many times have you changed your url? not once, tried it, but I am very bad at being unique with names

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years? yep, my irl best friend :D

a soap bar that smells good? uuuuuuuuh idk, soap flavour is good on its own

do you use lip balm? trying to use it more

did you have any snacks today? sweet snacks ye

how do you take your coffee? I don't lol

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site? Whatsapp and mobile games

what’s your take on spicy foods? trying to build a better tolerance, but I like it!

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it? maybe Elon Musk to end the stupid shit

can you remember what happened yesterday? yep, burgur and Minecra

favorite holiday film? Nightmare before christmas!

what was the last message you sent? "Aquí también hace fresco"<- talking about the weather with a friend in another country rn

when did you first try an alcohol beverage? this year with family

can you skip rocks? nope

can i tag you in random stuff? of course!:D

talking about tagging, I am gonna tag

@changeling-ash and @bagely :D

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[flannelshirtandjeans]

wyatt for the oc ask please ^_^

Thank you! 😊 Warning for mentions of past SA and disordered eating / body image. Please take care of yourself and skip this if you don't wanna see mentions of that and the recovery.

Full name: Wyatt Epping

Best friend: Ordell Taro

Sexuality: bisexual

Favourite colour: Teals and aquas

Relationship status: uuuh at what point? xD I guess "currently" as an adult, happily in a committed relationship; not married.

Ideal mate: someone who's patient with him and his traumas, and his need to take stuff slow. Someone who doesn't want kids. Someone who's willing to try even when it's hard, someone who he can rely on and who can also rely on him. Someone who he can relax and have fun with.

Turn-ons: whispering in his ear, caring, praise (but don't... talk to him like he's a dog)

Favourite food: creamy salmon soup, chocolate mousse, various stir-fries

Crushes: several throughout his life. 😂

Favourite music: a lot of the classical music he used to dance to in ballet school, particularly that in Nutcracker, and Romeo and Juliet. Otherwise a fan of like light and airy stuff, (despite being in a rock band for a good while lmao - he enjoys it, but in his free time opts usually for calmer stuff).

Biggest fear: never healing from trauma, and never being able to form meaningful long-lasting relationships out of being scared. He proves this fear wrong, eventually. Moreover, being afraid that something similar might happen again one day.

Biggest fantasy: to live by a lake with his love and not have to worry about money or health, have a little garden.

Bad habits: kind of an addictive personality, so it's easy for him to fall for his vices and become addicted to unhealthy habits, so he tries to steer clear of them. Helpful to the point of stepping on toes or being annoying, or getting grumpy if he can't help. Short tempered when tired and/or drained from too much socializing.

Biggest regret: going to the house party where he was assaulted. He couldn't have known but still regrets it - it ruined his life for a good while.

Best kept secrets:

Last thoughts: like, what his last ever thought is before he dies??? EVER??? THAT'S SAD. Um. "Have to remember to buy coffee tomorrow."

Worst romantic experience: Getting back into dating after his SA in general. He was not a very good boyfriend at the time, and some people were horrible matches for him.

Biggest insecurity: outside of SA trauma-related insecurities, Wyatt used to be pretty insecure about his body during his ballet years, to a point of flirting with disordered eating (which his family did their best to address and help him avoid). He was and is just built differently from most of his peers in ballet, where the ideals are... unhealthy pretty often. Those ideals would have been impossible for Wyatt to meet even if he tried because he's just built sturdy, strong, and wide.

Weapon of choice: n/a

Role Model: his mom, who is one of the strongest kindest and most like... determined and loving people he knows, and who sticks to what she thinks is right with passion.

[willwrite4mora]

Diluc x Reader: Date with a Hero

"And he saved a group of adventurers from a horde of hilichurls last night! He's just so amazing!" you were gushing about your crush, the Darknight Hero, again. "And so mysterious," you said, drifting off into your own daydreams.

You were sitting at a table in the tavern near the bar with your colleagues Amber and Kaeya. Amber rolled her eyes in annoyance, having heard you talk about the Darknight Hero a million times already. Kaeya only smirked and let you continue rambling on.

"I wonder if he's single," you mindlessly gushed.

Kaeya started laughing. "Oh, he might be. I know someone who knows him."

You perked up. "You do?" you asked in disbelief.

"Oh yeah, Diluc knows the guy. Right, Diluc?" he turned around in his chair to look straight at Diluc who was cleaning glasses before being interrupted. He jolted in shock, not expecting to be called out like this. He glared at Kaeya as soon as he got over his initial shock.

"Wow, I knew Diluc had many connections, but I didn't know he did to this extend!" you exclaimed in surprise. Diluc just stayed silent, still glaring at Kaeya.

Kaeya just laughed again. "He sure does! I bet he could set you up on a date!" he said and continued his laughter.

Diluc's cheeks hot red. He tried so hard to stay calm, but Kaeya was trying to test his limits again. He was sure Kaeya knew about his crush on you, and this was just his stupid little way to make a fool out of him.

But you looked just too happy to resist. "Would you really do that for me?" you asked hopefully. He tried to hide his blush from you by hiding the lower half of his face behind a hand. He stayed quiet and looked away.

When you got no answer, you felt your heart sink. "Oh, I see," you said, disappointed. "I don't think the Darknight Hero would like me like that anyway. I have nothing to offer..."

Diluc's heart broke hearing you talk about yourself like that. He quickly tried to regain his composure. "I could set you up," he blurted out.

Your smile returned. "Really? Thank you so much!" you said.

Kaeya was laughing again, but Diluc decided to ignore him. "I'll prepare a luxurious dinner for the two of you at my winery. How about tomorrow night?" he asked.

"Yes!" you answered full of enthusiasm. "I'll be there at six!"

Diluc nodded. "I'll send the message," and with that he continued his work behind the counter. You continued enthusiastically conversing with Amber about your upcoming date while Kaeya couldn't seem to catch his breath laughing.

The following day at six, you were knocking on the front door of Diluc's mansion. It was a huge place, perfect for a romantic dinner. You had dressed up nicely for your date and you had done your hair and makeup as well.

A few seconds later, Diluc opened the door. "Ah, Y/N, please come in. The Darknight Hero hasn't arrived yet, but he let me know he'll be here soon," he said. He stepped out of the way for you to walk inside. Then, he closed the door behind you.

He led you into a large dining room with a large table of which only two seats at one end were set up. A candelabra with three burning candles stood in the middle between the two plates. Diluc pulled out a chair for you, directing you to sit down. He pushed the chair back as you placed yourself on it.

"Dinner will be served soon. Just a little patience," he said, before walking out of the room.

It was quite. You sat in silence and only heard the clock tick and your own heart hammer. You were so nervous to meet the amazing hero of Mondstadt. After a few minutes, you heard footsteps in the hallway near the dining room. Your heartbeat sped up.

The door opened and you looked up to see a mysterious man with an owl mask on. He really came. You were at a loss for words, only able to mutter out, "Darknight Hero..."

He looked into your eyes at the mention of his name. His flaming red hair was pulled back into a high ponytail and his clothes were black. That was probably to increase his stealth in the night, but damn, did it also simply just look good on him.

"Yes, I am the Darknight Hero," he stated simply before taking a seat on the chair opposite of you. He spoke with a familiar voice, but you just shrugged off the feeling.

"So Diluc does know you personally! He never ceases to amaze me," you were thinking out loud. "I can't believe he got a real mysterious hero to go on a date with me."

He chuckled and you blushed at the wonderful sound. "I wouldn't want to miss this opportunity for the world. Fine dining with a girl as pretty as you is a rare opportunity," he charmed.

You swooned. He was such a smooth talker, sweeping you off your feet with just a few words.

A few maids stepped in with plates filled with different different dishes and set them down on the table between you. One of the maids brought in a tumbler of water and another one brought out a bottle of grape juice, filling the Darknight Hero's wine glass with it.

Once the maids stepped out of the room, you asked, "do you like grape juice more than wine?"

"I certainly do," he answered. "In fact, it's one of my favorite drinks."

You were thinking to yourself. "What a coincidence. I think that's Diluc's favorite as well."

"I-is that so?" he stuttered. He tried to avoid your eyes as he was speaking. "That certainly is a strange coincidence."

"It sure is," you said, before getting some food from the buffet the maids provided onto your plate. The Darknight Hero sighed in relief as you apparently didn't press the issue any further.

During your dinner, you two were talking about Mondstadt affairs and the like. After a few more bites, you were starting to crave some wine. You gulped down your food and said, "I think I know a wine that would go really well with these dishes. I think I'll go ask Diluc if we could get a bottle."

You got up from your seat and the Darknight Hero quickly got up as well. "Y-you don't have to ask!" he said with panic in his voice.

You were confused. "Nonsense. I can't just raid his cellar without permission," you tried to argue. "I'll go to his office and just ask. It will only take a second." You got up and quickly made your way out of the dining room, then up the stairs. Once you were outside Diluc's office, you knocked on the door.

And you waited a good few minutes without an answer. You could hear some noise behind the door, but you didn't know what was happening. "Diluc?" you asked concerned.

Seconds later, Diluc opened the door. He looked a bit disheveled. There was a small branch stuck in his hair. You felt a cold breeze come in through the open window. "Hello, Y/N. How can I help you?" he simply asked.

You stared at him for a second. "Since when do you wear your hair in a high ponytail?" you asked. You didn't think you've ever seen him with his hair up like this.

Diluc starteled, feeling his head for where he wore his ponytail. It was indeed high up. He cursed quietly, then straightened his posture again. "I sometimes do when I'm doing paperwork," he quickly said.

"Oh, alright then," you said. "I was wondering if we could get a bottle of wine from your cellar. I know one that would be great with our dinner. If you don't mind, that is."

He nodded. "Of course. Follow me." The two of you took off to the wine cellar.

Once inside, Diluc lit a candle. "Which one?" he asked.

You told him which bottle you wanted and he took it out of a large rack for you, handing it over into your hands. "Thank you so much!" you thanked him enthusiastically. "Now back to my date!" You turned around and ran up the stairs, back to the dining room.

The Darknight Hero wasn't there anymore, though. Your heart sank. Did he bail on you? He wouldn't, would he? You thought you were getting along with him just fine. You sat down on your chair, feeling defeated.

Then, through the open dining room window, in came your date. He also had a twig stuck in his hair. His mask was on a bit crooked and he was missing one glove. You were happy to see him, though, and got up from your spot in order to help him in. Not that a strong hero like him needed your help.

"Oh my! What happened?" you asked. "Did someone attack and did you have to leave?" You sounded so worried.

The Darknight Hero hastily shook his head no. "Please, don't worry. I uuuh... I just wanted to... see if the weather was nice enough for a walk," he improvised.

"A walk?" you questioned. Then you smiled at him. "What a romantic idea!" You clapped your hands together before turning around. "I'll go tell Diluc we'll be off. He's probably still in the wine cellar," you said, before turning around and making your way out of the room.

The Darknight Hero groaned loudly, but you kept going. Once in the cellar, you couldn't find Diluc anywhere. The candle was still burning. You decided to put it out before making your way back up. Once out the door of the cellar, you saw Diluc standing in the hallway, seemingly out of breath.

You ran up to him. "There you are, Diluc!" you exclaimed as you got closer. His hair was still in the high ponytail and the twig was also still stuck. He had no gloves or jacket on. You wondered where those went. Anyway, you continued to inform him, "the Darknight Hero and I will be taking a walk around the estate. I just wanted to inform you before leaving the mansion."

Diluc huffed loudly. "That... is alright..." he could barely speak between pants.

Then you noticed something that stuck to his shirt. You came closer and stepped to his side, taking a good look. Once you saw what it was, you plucked it off.

Diluc was confused at first, then saw what you were holding. It was the mask of the Darknight Hero. He just stared at you wide eyed, not sure what to say or how to get himself out of this mess.

You looked up at him and held up the mask for him to see. "Care to explain?" you asked accusingly.

He gulped. "Well..." he started, but he really didn't know what else to tell you but the truth. He took a deep breath before finally saying, "I guess you could say I've been leading a double life of sorts." He looked away guiltily, scratching with one hand behind his head.

"So you're saying that you've been the Darknight Hero all along?" you asked.

"Yeah..." he admitted.

There was a short silence between the two of you before he continued.

"I know I shouldn't have abused my position as the Darknight Hero like this, but I've liked you for a while now," he said, cheeks getting red from embarrassment. "I know whenever you were talking about the Darknight Hero, your compliments weren't for me, though they indirectly felt that way. I felt happy that you liked me back, even though it was a different version of me... I hope you aren't too angry with me."

"I cant believe the Darknight Hero likes me back!" you squealed.

Diluc was confused for a second. "You're not mad at me?"

"Oh, I'm very mad, but also very happy," you said with a smile on your face.

Diluc smiled in return. "Then how can I make it up to you?"

"Continue our date," you demanded. "But this time as Diluc."

[depressedhatakekakashi]

Uuuh imagine Kakashi being able to not being caught during the Kyuubi attack (I think I remember his generation being told to not go help for some reason and being kept behind) and running to Minato and Kushina to help and getting half of Kurama inside him instead of sealed away with Minato and growing up with baby Naru bc of course the two halves are kept together so they can be better controlled in case anything happens

The younger generation is kept out of the fight, you are correct. It’s under hiruzen’s orders and Kurenai’s father tells them they need to live to protect Konoha in the future.

Kakashi is a stealthy, sneaky lil shit so i could see him getting away. I think the only reason he was caught was because he was with Gai and they were relaxing at the time; and hadn’t gone into fight mode by the time they were found and pulled aside.

So i could see him avoiding the jonin that were sent out to retrieve them and finding his way to Minato. Realizing that he can’t save Minato and Kushina no matter how hard he tries, but he can save Minato from having to carry half of Kurema and make sure Naruto isn’t left to beat this burden alone

It’s not the easiest choice for him to make, but he knows it’s the best he can do for the sensei he’s about to lose.

And yes, i love the thought of Kakashi getting to be in Naruto’s life. Not raise him (he’s 14 we’re not trusting a traumatized 14 yr old to raise a baby) but to be active and present in Naruto’s life. To make sure Naruto is not alone and has good training long before becoming a genin so that he can control the Kyuubi’s chakra a bit better

He’s still learning himself of course and doesn’t have all of the answers, but he’s there for Naruto

[blueflyingturtleontheway]

And since I’m here, Deneb, Aldebaran, Black Eye Galaxy, and Comet for another game, please?

Wkakejqkdkwksks I AM SO SORRY I KEPT YOU WAITING SO LONG

Deneb: Have you ever been out of your home country? 

Yup! I've been on some vacations abroad and actually even more so when I was younger then now. But yes, I can say that I've even travelled quite a lot.

Aldebaran: What’s something you care desperately about? 

Oooh hard question. I guess it depends what category are we talking about? I care a lot about my family, and I unfortunately I also care a lot about being like by people x) But I suppose in general in life I care about creating, giving something from myself to others and leaving an impression and even more when I can be a part of some group and if this impression can be really meaningful.

Black Eye Galaxy: Do you believe in love at first sight? 

In a way? I definitely believe that you can fall in love at first sight but I still think you have to work on it for it to last.

Comet: What’s your big dream? 

Phew I'm so glad it asks for a big dream not the biggest, because I couldn't choose one to give this title. But tbf I'm in general a very content person, I feel like all my dreams are pretty shallow. Like, I really want to write this one story, I also dream about finally writing a full on original story or do something with this one universe I've been developing in my head for years, but all of those things I'd l"ike to happen" but I'm not working very hard for them to do, so I don't think they count as dreams then? Okay but those thoughts will make me spiral into a ditch and we Do Not Want That™! So let's say that a big dream of mine is to uuuh oh to become a translator of culture of some kind! Be it books, movies or shows, written, dubbing or subtitles, it all just sounds fascinating to me and if love to do it in the future!

Thank you so much for this ask and again sorry I kept it in for so long x)

Ask game

[yandere-sins]

Birthday shinsou fic where his friends kidnap y/n for him??? Thank u(^^)

I like that, friends helping out their friend :D Thank you for requesting!!

»»————-———— ♡ ————————-««

“Where are we going again?” Shinsou asked, innocently enough to be believable. But Deku was clever enough not to bite the bait, putting his pointer to his lips, signaling they were sealed. Shinsou sighed internally, giving in to his fate of being dragged out of the dorms in the middle of the night - on his birthday nonetheless!

One would think that at least this day meant something. That he’d at least get a break from all the people nagging on him lately. Ever since the joint training they did, he became friends with everyone involved, and though they were pretty okay people to be around, their enthusiasm often struck a nerve with Hitoshi.

All the more, it bothered him that they kept him from doing something he actually wanted to. Especially because it was his birthday, people had been around him all day, giving him little to no chance to see you. The only time had been in the morning as you walked to your classroom, Shinsou sending a longing glance after you. But after that, his day had been packed, and now, that he had planned to sneak over to your dorm, he’d been caught by Midoriya, who promised to show him something great.

“What could possibly be so great-” Shinsou muttered, when Deku made a sudden stop, signaling him to stand right there before he went to check the door, they were standing in front of. “-that you need to show it to me right now,” he finished his sentence sighing. From what he could tell, they had snuck into a warehouse from the back entrance, following a long corridor to a room inside of it. Deku knocked at the metal in a certain rhythm, reminding Shinsou of knock-codes from old movies, and for a moment, nothing happened at all.

Until suddenly, the door opened up a small gap, bright yellow light falling into the hallway. “There you are - finally!” a familiar voice groaned, Monoma’s if he guessed right. With a mighty drive, the door got pushed open, Midoriya running in quickly to stand in position as three different voices called out, “Happy Birthday!”

It took Shinsou a few blinks to get accustomed to the bright light before he could see anything, the faces of Monoma, Midoriya, and Kaminari falling into his field of view first before something else grazed his vision.

You.

Bound up and pretty, stirring at the sudden commotion, you could only let out muffled words, head moving side to side as you couldn’t see what was going on behind the blindfold. Still, he’d have recognized you everywhere. To think he’d ever get to see something so beautiful as you, wrapped in red ribbon just for him, blew his mind. Hitoshi felt almost close to tears as you sat there on a chair, surrounded by a few more wrapped gifts.

“We thought we’d make you a special present this year,” Monoma snickered, his intention as sinister as he was haughty. Hitoshi could see it in his face that his friend was more than pleased with what he had done, already believing he would get the best friend award for that year. “Hope you like it, Bro!” Denki called out from behind Hitoshi’s darling, putting a hand on your shoulder and making you flinch from the sudden touch.

“It wasn’t easy, but we know how much you like [Name]!” Midoriya added, picking up one of the presents on the floor and pressing it into the hands of a still baffled Shinsou. “Open up!”

Hesitantly, he navigated his fingers to the ribbon - the same red, vibrant ribbon that you were wrapped in - the box opening up to reveal tightly wrapped ropes and a pair of handcuffs in it. “Oh. My. God.” Shinsou muttered. Any normal person would have realized latest now how crazy all of this was. Not only you served to him on a silver platter, no, but you also came with a wide selection of tools to keep you.

But not Shinsou, and not that night.

He was delighted.

“I don’t know what to say,” he admitted, looking from one boy to the other. Monoma grinned even wider, knowing the had hit the right nerves with the usual so stoic Shinsou, seeing his eyes shine and a sincere smile on his lips. Kaminari only shrugged as if all of this wasn’t as big of a deal as it felt to Hitoshi, and Midoriya had a bashful expression, relieved to have made his friend happy. “We knew you’d like this, don’t be sparse with the ‘Thank you!’s.”

“Thanks, guys... really,” Shinsou only mustered to say, and the three exchanged knowing glances, their hearts full with pride and joy from seeing him so unusual sentimental. “Well, that’s that!” Kaminari announced, picking up another present to stack on top of the other as he approached Shinsou, the other two guys setting themselves in motion too.

“We’re sure you want to have fun with your presents, and you know how it is... we gotta, uuuh...”

“Be somewhere too!” Midoriya finished Denki’s sentence, snickering knowingly.

“Do have fun, my Friend,” Monoma chuckled as he passed Shinsou, the three disappearing behind the door he had just come from, calling back their farewells without another glance back at the birthday boy.

Not it was only you and him. You still were as confused as you must have been when they brought you here. Three true friends, always looking out for him and knowing exactly what Shinsou could desire in his life. Slowly he rounded you, taking in every struggle you made, how your legs and shoulders moved as you tried to wiggle out of the tough restrains around you. They hadn’t even undressed you, still keeping you in your uniform, pure and pretty. Just how he liked you the best.

Subconsciously, he began to unwrap the second present Kaminari had given to him, this time ripping the ribbon off unceremonial. Out came... his Artificial Vocal Cords, polished and clearly enhanced by someone. They even went out of their way to fix the broken part on the side from when he got beaten in the last training, making them as good as new.

Letting the box fall to the ground, he put them on, knowing exactly why they had made it a big deal to present them to him now. His now free hands drove over the back of your shoulders, feeling your warmth against his fingertips and taking in the flinches of your muscles under his touches. You were so alive, so real, right there in front of him.

You never gave Shinsou much mind when you met him in the hallways. The closest he came to you was when he laid beside you at night, watching you sleep. But now you were there, and you were all his. Switching on the device to enhance his quirk, he positioned himself in front of you, both hands combing through your hair before settling at the back of your head, unclasping the gag in your mouth.

There was nothing he wanted to hear more right now than your lovely voice, especially if it was in response to his questions.

“How about you wish me a happy birthday, [Name]?” he asked, all too curious as what would be words that would force you to fall in love with him forever.

[erekiosuncreativeideas]

The Part-Time Puppeteer - Chapter 06

<= Chapter 5

Summary : Lukas gets to have a heart-to-heart discussion with an absolute asshole. Also available on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/23828971/chapters/81015496

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AAAAH I'M SORRY FOR THE TWO MONTHS HIATUS I HAD A WRITER BLOCK---

Anyway uuuh, new chapter, I have no idea if it's good or not but still, here it is. I did my best to offer you a longer chapter as a compensation, it's twice the length of the last one.

Happy reading ! Thank you for waiting all this time.

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Chapter 6 - “Oh. It’s you.”

The rest of the day had been… Quite blurry for the student. After coming back home, he had sat down at his desk, staring into space for… Minutes, hours, he hadn’t been able to tell. It was an understatement to say that he was in shock after what had happened. Even after everything, his mind couldn’t help but think this was just a joke, or that he had imagined the whole thing. But the script in his bag was a proof of the contrary. For a good while, the young man hadn’t found the courage to look back at it, as if it were some sort of cursed object, haunting him. But then, the Conductor’s words came back to him: “learn your text by tomorrow”. An order, a clear one, coming from one of his bosses. The student shivered as he remembered, soon bringing his hands to his face, massaging his closed, tired eyes. Oh, boy, why did he always get in that kind of situation… Even when he was a kid, he would often get dragged in things like this. He had thought this would get better as he grew up, but noooo, of fucking course it wouldn’t. Lukas let out a loud, long, exaggerated sigh, and stood up. He walked to his sofa bed all while dragging his feet and, once he was in front of it, it was like what was left of his energy left him. What a day . With another sigh, the student felt his body fall forward, and it wasn’t long before his face hit one of his pillows. Air was forced out of his lungs by the impact, though he did nothing but grunt in the fabric. Him? An actor? This couldn’t be right, this just… It wasn’t right. Sure, MJ was a jerk, but he still had the skills and the experience! In comparison, Lukas was just a law student- not a bad one, mind you, which only made it even more surprising to see him getting the role. It wasn’t like he had chosen the wrong scholar path, no, on the contrary, he was skilled in his major. But apparently, his bosses had seen something else deep inside that walking shell of anxiety… -“Uuuuugh...” his voice was low and tired. For a moment, he thought he was almost going to fall asleep like this, still wearing his clothes, but he reluctantly sat down. With a look full of weariness and unwillingness, the student’s attention went back to his bag, in which the script was. He didn’t want to learn the lines, and a single glance at his desk full of homework was a good way to understand why. But it seemed like his paycheck was now depending on it, as much as he would have preferred to remain a stagehand… -“Guess I don’t have a choice…” he mumbled, before moving his foot to reach for the bag, making it slide towards him, so he could open it. He supposed that he would be able to scribble down the answers to his homework during his lunch break… Or, at least, he hoped. And so, the young man spent the next two hours learning his lines, saying them out loud, so he could remember them. A good thing about his brain was that it learned pretty well from words and sounds. Thus, by saying them out loud, Lukas was pretty efficient in remembering them. Plus, truth to be told, those lines weren’t exactly as hard to learn as his law books… Not that it was a bad thing, far from it. At least, it made his job far easier. However, he wasn’t going to lie, there were a few parts that were harder to remember. Once he was done, the student hesitated on whether he should go to sleep (the reasonable option) or try to get some of his homework done. Sure, he was pretty tired, and the day had been filled by a lot of diverse emotions… But part of him knew he just wouldn’t be able to fall asleep knowing what awaited him the day after. He had always been very anxious, this was a secret to no one, and especially not himself… However, this whole thing was very new, and it made it all worse. And so… The student ended up staying up late until three in the morning, managing to get most of his homework done. One of the perks of being good at a subject was being fast. Of course, this would have given him much better results if he had worked on it seriously, without all the tiredness and all, but the context wasn’t really allowing him that.

Thus, Lukas packed up his college stuff for the next day and soon went to sleep for one very short night. Oh, well, not his first, far from it. Thankfully, he had a few sleeping meds he had kept from an old treatment, allowing him to fall asleep rather quick. However, this always came at a price- they made waking up a much more difficult moment, as his body was still very much under the influence of the medicine when that happened. And the next morning… Was no exception, especially since he only got to sleep for less than three hours. Fighting the urge to go back to sleep, Lukas managed to get up and prepare himself for college. New clothes, brushing his hair and teeth… It only took him a moment until he was ready to leave his small apartment. Oh, his face, however… It looked like it belonged to a rotten corpse, who had just come back to life… Somewhat. The trip to college was pretty ordinary, and so was his morning and afternoon, actually. He gave his teachers all the papers that were due, he aced one of his oral presentation despite looking like a dead man… No, really, this day was going well, which was surprising considering he was mostly surviving thanks to coffee and to the fear of collapsing in public. Yeah, no, he didn’t want any attention on him… Which was a funny thing to think about, because this was exactly what he was going to get with his new job! Once his classes were over, Lukas took the bus to his workplace, dread settling on his shoulders, heavier and heavier as the minutes passed. Oh, he didn’t want to get that role… Of course, he could tell his bosses, but there was a small part of him, deep down, that was curious about where this would lead him. Now, obviously, being a stagehand was a pretty classic job, one without risks… But this? While he was terrified of screwing up, especially since people would be looking at him… Yeah, there was something that prevented him from refusing this promotion. And, also, if that could piss MJ off, then it was a good bonus. The studio reception was calm compared to the day before and, for a moment, just a small moment, the student thought his shift was going to be nice. But ooh, no, he couldn’t have nice things- the moment he opened the door leading to the staff areas, he winced as many voices echoed around him. They were coming from all directions, through walls, doors too! It was a large cacophony in there, and people were running around, carrying stuff and bringing props for each shooting. Actions movies, dramas, comedies… Each type had its own part of the studio, but there was this central room linking them all together and, oh, this place was just a battlefield. Moving fast through the agitated crowd, Lukas tried to reach his accredited part of the studio- the children shows shootings. Avoiding props almost falling on his feet accidentally, sneaking between people carrying hot coffee, and bending down to avoid planks being carried around… He bumped into someone just before he got to open the door leading to his area. -“Oh, I- I’m sorry,” he stammered, quickly moving back, so he could apologize properly to the person he had bumped into. However, his eyes widened when he recognized the figure in front of him. Mike! The good twin. For a second, the latter’s face had alarmed him, as he thought he had bumped into MJ instead… But thankfully, while having the same face, the two brothers had very different hairstyles and fashion choices. The student let out a sigh- phew, he wasn’t sure he would have been ready for MJ’s bullshit right at the beginning of his shift. -“Oh, hey!” Mike seemed almost as surprised as he was, though his expression quickly changed to a warm, welcoming one: “Good to see you again- oh, wait, let’s, uh… Get inside,” he then mumbled, opening the door quickly so they both could leave the absolute war zone they were in. Lukas didn’t lose any time and followed the other like a shadow would, only getting the opportunity to sigh in relief as they found themselves in a much quieter place. Kinda ironic that the children shows part of the

studio was calmer than the staff hall... -“Hey,” he finally replied, now that the “battlefield” was behind them: “It’s good to see you too,” he answered trustfully, with a smile. He hadn’t seen the other since MJ’s outburst the day before, and getting the chance to meet him again was a good way of making Lukas’ day a little better and… Less chaotic. -“How are you?” he then asked, deciding to take a moment for a conversation with his only friend in the studio so far. Plus, he was… Worried. With what had happened the day before, and how MJ had thrown Mike’s puppet on the floor like it was nothing, he wanted to make sure everything was okay. -“Oh, I’m… Doing fine,” the other looked away with an awkward smile, which was an obvious sign that things had definitely happened yesterday. With how furious the actor had been when leaving the shooting, Lukas could very well imagine the latter taking his frustration on his brother. What an asshole. But, it was family business, and he couldn’t say anything about it, as a stranger. -“What about you?” Mike added quickly, visibly determined on changing the topic: “I heard you got the role, yesterday. Congrats!” The praise took the student by surprise, and he felt his cheeks reddening from the embarrassment. Oh, man, this was new, yeah… He wasn’t used to that kind of thing. His stance tensed up, and a sheepish smile took place on his lips. -“Oh, uh… Thanks,” he blurted out, and it was his turn to look away: “It’s… Really weird, I guess I’m just… Feeling a bit shocked, you know?” he turned his head back to his new friend and a nervous giggle escaped him. He was fidgeting, not really knowing how to respond to that. -“Ah, yeah, it’s your first time,” Mike nodded, remembering that Lukas had first been hired as a stagehand, not as an actor: “Don’t worry, children shows are the perfect way to start as a beginner. You know, with the public being less critical and all… I’m sure you’ll get used to it in no time.” The puppet maker was kind, trying to reassure Lukas and ease his anxiety. Too bad that his stage fight was skyrocketing since the moment he had stepped in the building again… Another nervous giggle left his lips, and he started to rub his arm, not knowing what to do with his hands. -“I suppose so…” he muttered, still smiling, though it looked less genuine: “It’s just that… I mean… Why me? I’m just a guy who wanted a part-time job. I’m not an actor, I don’t have any experience…” -“Well, from what I’ve heard, you were pretty good yesterday- oh, speaking about that…” Mike’s face darkened, as if he had just remember to mention something unpleasant: “I think you should… Avoid MJ, as much as you can, from now on. My brother, he’s… He didn’t take it well, I’m not gonna lie, and… I mean, you saw how he is with people, he’s not the best at being with others. Now, with what happened yesterday, I don’t think he’ll make your life any easier.” The student grimaced as he listened to his friend. Yeah… Yeah, he had seen that coming. With how livid MJ had been when leaving the set, it wasn’t surprising that the latter was going to make his shifts hell. God, he really hoped he would manage to avoid that jerk… -“Yeah, I… Kinda expected that,” he admitted, tilting his head to the side with a wince: “But, uh… Since he’s not part of the team anymore, I shouldn’t run too much into him… Right?” -“I wish I’d say yes, but…” Mike answered, his face showing conflict: “He has some other roles in the studio, and he might come see me now and then, so… Yeah. Be careful and do your best to avoid him. He’s not… The best person to be around when he’s like this.” “Oh, you mean all the time, then?” Lukas thought to himself, but kept his mouth shut. Not the best thing to say out loud, especially when it came to said person’s twin. Still, he couldn’t help but wonder why Mike was making so many efforts for someone that clearly didn’t deserve them… But, then again, he was a stranger, it wasn’t his place to say anything. -“Will do,” he assured his friend, before looking at his watch and- oh, shit, he was going to

be late. Apparently, it must have been visible from his expression, because the puppet maker let out a soft giggle: -“Oh, yeah, it’s time,” he looked up, as if he were trying to remember something: “Last time I saw the Conductor and DJ Grooves, they were in the conference room with some investors. You should go practice in the meantime… My workshop is open, if you want,” he offered with a shrug: “It’s a small room, but I’m normally the only one there, so if you wanna have some quiet, alone time to rehearse, well… I need to help the stagehands for some set repairs, so I won’t bother you.” The offer was a really nice attention, another one that did help to make Lukas’ day a little better. Considering his promotion, he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to help the other stagehands while waiting for his bosses, but… Well, practicing really wouldn’t hurt, especially considering how short his night had been. -“Thanks, I really appreciate it,” he gave Mike a warm smile, before pointing to a door on the other side of the room: “It’s this one, right?” he asked for confirmation. -“Yep, that’s the one! Just, uh… Please don’t touch anything, most of the puppets and costumes aren’t done, so they’re quite fragile.” Lukas assured him he wouldn’t, and even then, he didn’t have any reason to. At least, contrary to his friend’s twin, he knew how to respect someone’s work… And with that, the two waved to one another, before heading to opposite directions. The student walked to the door with a quick pace, wanting to get as much time as possible to practice. When he opened it, he was surprised to see that, yeah, the room was pretty small indeed, even smaller than what he had imagined. The place was full of puppets hanging from the ceiling, and the walls were covered in eccentric and colorful clothes. It was almost eye straining! Two out of the four corners of the rooms were used to stock supplies and different types of fabric, making the room even smaller than it originally was. Then, hidden in the third corner was a desk with a sewing machine on top of it. It looked like an old but durable one, the kind that would last years even if it was out-of-date. Other than that, the desk was full of smaller supplies, like needles, sewing threads, pens, pieces of paper, templates… It was like this room had no free space other than the center of it. Well, Lukas supposed this is where he would rehearse, then. Not like there were many other option… The young man closed the door behind him and made a few steps, his eyes looking all around him. He didn’t think it was possible to fit so many things in a single room, but, hey, he was wrong! He then shook his head- it was time to work. After clearing his throat, the student opened his bag and took the script out, flipping the pages up to the parts he had the most trouble remembering. Oh, jeez, he really was doing this, wasn’t he? This was so weird… But whatever paid his bills and his studies, he guessed. And so… He got to work. It was a lot easier to practice when there was no one around. No one to judge him, no one to mock him when he fucked up… Yeah, it made it all easier. Sure, he didn’t have any experience in it, but at least he had to admit it was pretty fun. Nonetheless, he still had no idea why the two directors chose him over an experienced actor like MJ… Like, of course he had noticed the latter was a huge asshole, but other than that, his acting skills were obvious. Maybe he was being used to give MJ a lesson…? This seemed like the most probable explanation. After all, MJ’s presence in the casting was supposed to bring attention to the show… And now, one of the most important roles had been given to a nobody instead. It didn’t seem like a good idea, marketing-wise. Law was his specialty, but that didn’t mean he was stupid when it came to other things. Lukas couldn’t believe he had been chosen for his “talents”, because he had none on that field. After a moment, he paused his practice, shutting his eyes and letting out an exaggerated sigh. Shit, this was distracting him. He couldn’t focus

on his lines. His acting skills, if he had any, were affected by it. It was like something was entering his mind from one side only to disappear through another. Memorizing the words was harder than he had thought it would be the day before, and he couldn’t help but grunt in frustration. Fuck, he knew he was able to remember those lines, he had learned much more complex texts before! This script was simple, so the young man put the blame on his short night of sleep. Furthermore, it was hard to memorize something only by starting the day before… He was about to start again when he heard the door opening behind him, cutting him short. The student turned to the direction of the noise, expecting to see Mike’s face and… Well, in a way, he kinda did. Except it wasn’t Mike. It was MJ, the evil twin. “Oh, fuck me,” he thought, paling up. For fuck’s sake, right after Mike told him to avoid his brother! Was it a joke or something?! Before he even got the chance to speak, MJ’s expression changed from a neutral one to one of utter disgust. Yeah, clearly, the other had expected to see his twin, but… Nope, Lukas had been the one in the room. “Lesson learned, never going back in that workshop alone,” the student told himself, though it was way too late to do anything about it. -“Oh. It’s you,” the actor spat, this time not trying to keep his nice mask on like he had been when they had met the day before: “The fuck are you doing here?” The celebrity’s eyes were glaring at him, all while examining him from top to bottom. It was… Very unpleasant, to be stared at this way. And being talked to like that? Yeah, no, Lukas was perhaps a shy person, but he didn’t want to let anyone walk all over him, especially not an asshole like MJ. Usually, he tended to flee conflict, but today was different. He was way too tired to deal with this shit. -“Yes , hello to you too,” he muttered as an answer, quickly putting his attention back to the script: “Your brother’s not here, but he told me I could use the room in the meantime.” Apparently, his tone didn’t please the actor, whose eyes narrowed in response: -“No kidding, I can see my brother’s not here, dumbass,” he shrugged and rolled his eyes: “I’m not blind.” Oooh, the insult didn’t fall on deaf ears, and it really rubbed Lukas the wrong way. He turned to the celebrity again, this time returning the latter’s glare: -“Well, good for you, I guess,” the student spoke louder than his previous mutter. His annoyance was much more visible, though he still remained polite: “If you’re looking for Mike, he’s with the stagehands.” -“Didn’t ask,” the actor retorted harshly. The other’s eyes then fell on the script, and his expression darkened. Well, shit, this couldn’t be good- and, just like Lukas had predicted, it wasn’t. MJ’s look of hatred was soon replaced by a mocking yet salty expression, one that the student really didn’t like. -“Aw, am I interrupting something?” the celebrity taunted him, leaning against the door frame as a smirk took place on his lips. -“Actually, yes. You are,” Lukas’ patience was running out. God, he wanted to punch that guy so bad… Well, not like he would ever do that, he wasn’t that kind of person. Still, the urge was there. In response to his honest words, the actor scoffed loudly, rolling his eyes again. God, that fucking asshole… -“What, don’t tell me you honestly think you have what it takes!” MJ’s tone had changed from a mocking one to a harsher, meaner one: “You have no idea how to play a role- lemme guess, you never had any theater courses before, hm?” At Lukas’ silence, the celebrity snickered bitterly: -“Yeah, that’s what I thought. You’re just a nobody, a guy who happened to be there at the right time. But you, an actor? Don’t make me laugh. You don’t know shit about acting.” Okay, now that was enough. Politeness was nice and all, but with this guy? No, nu-huh, nope, not happening. In an instant, Lukas’ attempts at remaining civil were thrown away through a window. No one could talk to him like that, and not even his anxiety was

going to silence him. -“Oh, I don’t know shit about acting, that’s right,” he talked back, his tone much more aggressive: “But at least I know how to be a decent person.” -“Excuse me?” MJ’s face showed a mix of bewilderment and fury, probably because no one ever confronted him like this in the past: “I didn’t steal someone else’s job!” -“Hah, that’s rich!” the student scoffed, raising his arms with a scandalized expression: “You lost your job! I didn’t do anything!” his voice echoed in the room as his anger intensified: “If you weren’t such an asshole, maybe you’d have kept your place in the-” However, the student didn’t even get the time to finish his sentence. The celebrity had dashed towards him, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, bringing their face close as an intimidating gesture: -“Watch your fucking mouth,” was the warning he got from the other, whose eyes were fixed on his: “There are so many things I could do to make your life a living Hell. I have a lot of strings I can pull, and if I were you, I wouldn’t risk that,” the actor’s voice had got lower, like a murmur, a clear threat directed to him. But Lukas was just getting so fucking tired of it. Enough was enough. He grabbed the celebrity’s hand and pulled it away, forcing the latter to let go of him. -“So, let me get this straight: you want to destroy me because I pointed out how much of a jerk you were to everyone? And you still think you’re the decent person out of us two? You might want to rethink that, buddy.” The response he got was yet another glare, though this time there was no spiky answer. “Of course I’m right, asshole, can’t say anything back, now, can you?” he thought to himself, pride swelling inside him. Man, this was perhaps the first argument he ever won… Holy shit, yeah, it was- and he didn’t even stutter! Maybe he needed to be tired more often- yeah, no, that wasn’t a good idea. Air was forced out of his lungs as he was pushed away, though despite the fear of being punched, it never came. The look of pure hatred he was getting from MJ was almost burning him and, for a moment, he really thought he would get attacked- being someone who had never fought anyone, he wasn’t really confident about his abilities to fight back. But all MJ did was to step back to the door, a furious expression written all over his face: -“You wanna play that game with me?” he spat: “Fine. But mark my words, stagehand, I will win.” And not even giving Lukas the time to retort anything, the actor stormed off the room and slammed the door behind him. It screamed “ I am mad, and I want everyone to know that”. Lukas, however, did not give a single fuck about it. Perhaps it was the tiredness speaking (and it was), but if the other wanted to fight, then Lukas would be ready. Well, he probably wouldn’t in hindsight, once his mind cleared up… But at the moment, the young man’s anger was making him blind to many aspects. One of them being that MJ was a famous person who was indeed capable of destroying him, and making him fail his studies with just the right calls. But this wasn’t something Lukas would realize before calming down. And only then, he would ask himself “why the hell couldn’t I keep my mouth shut like usual?!” Until that moment… The student kept rehearsing, though his anger prevented him from actually anything. Today was going to be a long day…

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Hopefully Lukas won't have too much trouble with this jerk of an actor :)c (who I love with all my heart)

=> Chapter 7