#so this is a thing which has occurred to me on several occasions

[apparitionism]

Court 2

Hi @amtrak12 —here, on the occasion of the B&W-meeting anniversary, I have the next part of your @b-and-w-holiday-gift-exchange gift, which is turning out overall to be a slower-than-slow unspooling that has something to do with lawyers and arguments and ownership. Herein, the plot thickens. Or maybe just clots, or perhaps congeals. Anyway, events—or “events”?—occur. Following, sort of, what happened in part 1. (Contributing to my usual sluggish pace is the fact that it’s been a rough several months, for me at least. I hope everyone’s holding tight to whatever helps...)

Court 2

Leena stumbles. She is sitting in Artie’s Warehouse office, waiting for Claudia to finish some database update or other, and yet her entire being manages to lose its footing. To stumble.

“Are you okay?”

The question from Claudia startles Leena out of her first response to the lurching sensation: trying to ascertain whether she should have been more attentive, all day, to the background hum of artifactual grumbling. They always want attention, artifacts do, but has today been—and is this moment in particular—about attention? Or has some hapless item found itself in genuine distress?

“Seriously, are you okay?” Claudia asks again, again startling Leena, enough that instead of what would usually be a measured “yes,” she voices an awkward “huh?”

“You look like somebody kicked your puppy. Or wait...” Claudia squints. “More like your puppy did a thing and you don’t know if you should give it a treat or say ‘bad dog.’”

“You do cut right to it,” Leena says, because Claudia has.

“I’m discerning.” She squints again. “Is that what I mean? Myka would know.”

“Even if it isn’t, you are. And yes, she would.”

Claudia beams, likely on both accounts. “Thanks! Probably. So what’s up with your puppy?”

“I can’t tell,” Leena admits. “Something dramatic. And the real question is, which puppy?”

“I can’t help here. First, because I don’t know what we’re talking about, and B, because I was never one of those kids who wanted a puppy. But mostly because my helping skills are pretty much always under construction.”

Don’t run yourself down, Leena would admonish, but whatever those artifacts are up to is the more pressing issue, and anyway Claudia generally shrugs off explicit direction to acknowledge her value... unless, interestingly, it’s Myka who delivers it. So she goes slightly more opaque and functional: “Come with me. We can both figure out what we’re talking about, and maybe you can hammer at those skills.”

“Where are we going?”

Leena closes her eyes and concentrates on the disquiet, trying to orient. “Container aisle,” she determines. “Can’t narrow it down more than that.”

They reach the floor and walk for a bit. Then Claudia says, like she’s been thinking about it, “Container aisle? I’d rather go to the Container Store.”

“Need more organization in your life?”

“In Pete’s life.”

Leena waits for it.

Claudia delivers, “Because when I go to steal DVDs and games from his room I’d like to able to find them.”

It’s not the best. Leena waits again. This time, Claudia doesn’t deliver, instead saying, with a little mournful pout, “What’s the container aisle for, anyway? Boxes? Bottles? Tupperware?”

“Some of all of those. Generally, artifacts that hold. Catch and hold, or just accept to hold.”

“Hold. Hold... stuff?”

“Yes?” Leena isn’t sure what Claudia means by “stuff.” She’s often a little unsure about what Claudia intends words to mean, and she suspects she’s not the only one. Except for, perhaps, Myka? And possibly Steve? Still, Claudia does flummox Steve...

“But everything holds stuff,” Claudia says. “It’s what makes a thing a thing. A thing is just a stuff container.”

“Philosophy. Impressive.” Leena says it quietly, so as to keep Claudia’s ego in check, yet she’s delighted. However: “Things are stuff containers mostly by an accident of metaphysics. The aisle stores things designed for holding.”

“So this is the aisle we’d put the Warehouse itself in. If we could do that kind of freaky recursion function... or does that only work the other way, where it’d be recursion for the Warehouse to hold the containers?”

“The aisle’s already itself holding more than one Joseph Cornell box. That’s enough recursion for me.” Leena keeps her tone casual, but she’s further delighted that Claudia is so obviously thinking. Seeing connections and associations: it’s what she’ll need. For the future... Leena stops herself; she doesn’t want to be disturbed, today, by the future. There’s enough to puzzle out in the present, given her stumble, given what now seems to be an increasing disgruntlement in the artifacts’ hum.

And given the fact that the container aisle always gives her pause, for she does have particular friendships here. Certainly those Cornell boxes; artifacts that have true auras thrill her, especially when said auras have been so meticulously constructed. Leena wishes she could have met Cornell, could have sat him down so as to parse his ability to engineer these compact works of acquisition, accumulation: little Warehouses, all of them. Only a few are actual artifacts, but that’s more than most artists could dream of generating. If they ever did so dream... but it’s better that they don’t.

She also casts a regularly kind eye (and ear) on the Wurlitzer 1015 jukebox, because it’s a favorite of Mrs. Frederic from her past, and any window into Mrs. Frederic’s (relative) youth is inherently interesting; this jukebox likes to play the Marcels’ 1961 “Blue Moon” unprompted, and Leena has never gathered sufficient nerve to ask if it might have been a tendency of Mrs. Frederic herself to select the platter that catapulted the constellation of record and container-player to artifact status.

And then there’s the—

“Oh my god,” Claudia says, loudly but more deadpan than seems warranted, given the... unexpected situation? absurdist tableau? catastrophic scene? that now confronts them, and Leena blames her rumination on her aisle-friends for having distracted her from the sensory tsunami of auras that threatens, in this overpowering instant, to drown her.

****

“The artifact currently belongs to a... let’s call it a museum,” Artie is saying. “Well. ‘Belongs.’ I suppose we should say, ‘resides in.’ Hence the case. The argument.”

“Is this about repatriation?” Myka asks. It’s what she associates with museum objects and court fights—but in the next instant she sees she’s let slip from her grasp the idea that she’s supposed to be waiting, inferring. She seizes, freezes. Can everyone see the “oh no!” thought bubble above her head?

Luckily, no one seems to notice, so she forges on: “If so, I think I’d be more convincing making the case for it. Than Helena, I mean.”

“Why?” Helena asks.

“Because you’re British,” Myka says, but she can’t stop there; a babble is building, and with no dam in sight, she burbles on, “so no offense, but there was a lot of honestly indefensible taking and holding of other cultures’ stuff. And you’d be likely to bring that whole thing to mind... so, really, it’s because you sound British.”

“English,” Helena corrects.

“A distinction without a difference,” Myka says, and this time she achieves a levee; she congratulates herself on for once being succinct. Clichéd, but succinct.

“Now I’m offended.”

Oh god. “All I meant was—”

“I’m teasing.”

Her smile fills Myka’s vision. And the prickly pleasure Myka finds in being teased, in being the object of Helena’s smooth humor, fills her soul.

Artie’s voice breaks in, a buoyancy-deflating puncture: “It’s possible she’d be more effective. Implicitly acknowledging the error—no, the criminality—of colonial ways.” He gives Helena another pointed look.

This one’s nationalized, generalized, and Myka tries to dispute it that way: “Americans aren’t angels.” She realizes—too late?— that she’s undercutting her own initial reasoning. No saving that now. “But also, arguing that whatever museum I’m pretending to represent should keep it? I’m not comfortable with that.” As the words leave her, a that’s right shiver—unexpected, unusual—ripples her spine.

Artie says, “And the Warehouse cares intensely about your comfort level, so... oh wait. No. It doesn’t.”

Pete glances at Myka, then says, “Let her off the hook, man. I’ll do it.”

It’s sweet.

But she wants to strangle him for it—because adversaries. She should have kept her mouth shut. A good rule to live by, as she thinks about it. Wait, but is saying she should have done something actually a rule? She can’t live by something she should have done, can she?

“You’ll lose,” Artie says... answering her thought? No, reproving—informing—Pete.

“So what?” Pete says. “Then H.G. wins and we all come home.”

“Let me rephrase: you’ll look like you intended to lose. Judges get tetchy about tanking.”

Claudia mock-gasps. “Oooh, might get disbarred.”

“And then I’d be crying.” Pete says, brushing away imaginary tears. “If I was barred in the first place.”

Artie says, “Your tears won’t move a judge, who might throw the case out entirely, and then where would we be?” He doesn’t wait for an answer: “Without the artifact.”

“If nobody wins, everybody loses,” Claudia intones, sounding like the Delphic oracle. Or Socrates? Something classical, obfuscatory. Obstructionary?

“Not the Elgin Marbles,” Myka says next. “Please, no.” Other than their classicality, she isn’t sure why she’s brought the  into the discussion... is it simply that it’s the biggest repatriation case she knows of—maybe even literally? Now as she thinks about it, though, surely it’s too big. Artie wouldn’t want to generate that kind of publicity, would he? She and Helena wouldn’t be able to fake their way into a case like that, would they? Then again, the two of them in the news... what news they would be...

“Agreed,” Helena says. “Please.”

Myka hadn’t expected the immediate backup—though she’s unsurprised to learn that Helena knows of those disputed rocks—but she’ll take it. She wishes she could reach out a hand and... what? Stroke Helena’s arm in thanks?

Well, why can’t she? Nothing classically obstructionary stands in her way.

So she does.

Helena slides a look her way, not with surprise (of course not); rather, with some cognate of the that’s right ripple.

Which in turn produces a recursive ripple, a catch-hold-echo of right... right... right...

“Artifactually inert,” Artie says as it fades. “As far as we know.”

“Better safe, though,” Claudia enthuses, “so let’s bring those babies in! Pete can carry ’em.”

Pete snorts. “Not even with these guns. Big rocks carved pretty are still big rocks.”

Since when does Pete know anything about the Elgin Marbles? But Myka is being uncharitable. Probably. And besides, she would rather let them have the dispute, for it lulls her back into her earlier reverie, that compelling scenario of she a judge and Helena an advocate... no: a supplicant.

Her reverie... but that not-really (if-only) supplicant interrupts it, saying, “So, not the marbles.” This makes it clear that Myka’s continued expressions of ignorance about “it” have not mattered in the slightest... apparently “it” was never identified? Neither Artie nor anyone else is holding a file, which Myka chooses to interpret as positive, for who could, in such absence, have read anything about whatever’s at stake?

Myka is safe.

And yet she’s not safe at all, for Helena chooses that moment to reach out a reciprocal hand toward Myka. It finds her right biceps, setting off electrical sparks and short-outs and terror—Artie will see! Pete will see! Claudia will see! and as the worst disaster: even Helena will see!—then trailing down to her elbow, fortunately a less sparkily reactive location.

Still. she is not safe at all. Because, among other potential catastrophes: what if Helena tries something like that in court?

****

Pete’s stalking the Warehouse aisles, looking for Myka; she’s been down lately, and he hates it when she takes off like this, like she needs to hide in a cave and lick some wounds she’s trying to pretend she doesn’t have.

But also: he has a vibe.

Sometimes, if a vibe isn’t too insistent, he can shove it onto the Vibe Bench. When he was a kid, he used to talk them away like that, saying it out loud: “Ride the pine, vibe!”

This one he can’t make sit down, and honestly? It comes down to how Myka-vibes sometimes remind him of Mom-vibes, the way they scream IMPORTANT!

Which is why he doesn’t really grok where he’s finding his way to, and that’s why he’s genuinely shocked, practically out of the vibe, by what he sees when he takes a hard turn into the aisle that’s clearly today’s Vibe Hub: it’s H.G., standing there like she belongs or something, like she’s never been gone, like she can just hang out and it’s no big deal.

But it’s definitely some kind of deal. “What are you doing here?” he demands.

She looks like she wants to bite him in half, but she wraps her arms around herself like she’s keeping that in check, like otherwise she’d actually do it. “Conducting a symphony,” she spits. “Weaving a tapestry. Piloting a dirigible. As if any answer could satisfy you.”

She’s totally not wrong. It’s almost funny how totally not wrong she is.

But then he notices that she’s unfolded her arms, that she’s gesturing at the floor. He looks down, down at that cold concrete Warehouse floor, and nothing nothing nothing is funny or even almost, because there, lying there out cold, is Myka. His vibe charges back into the game, and rage takes over: “What did you do?”

TBC

[hangingslothcentral]

whenever i start a new project, i find myself going on a little journey across the internet looking for advice on starting new projects. i know how to do it, but i'm always curious about other people's ideas. most of the stuff i read is aimed at new creators who don't know how to get things off the ground at all.

one thing that strikes me about it is that there isn't really any consensus about how to start something, and i think that's really great! there's a million ways to approach a problem, and (short of solutions which harm or exploit others) none of them are wrong if they're the one that's working best for you.

still, a significant number of the articles i read position themselves as having The Answer for how to make a thing. i think a lot of people sorta feel they have to frame their advice like this in order to give the impression that they know what they're talking about.

sometimes as i'm reading i get gripped with a sense of panic about it, a feeling of 'oh no i'm doing things WRONG', or concern that two ideas about new approaches which I've found would be interesting to try cannot be applied at the same time to the same project.

but! advice between one article and the next isn't necessarily going to carry over or map on perfectly. many pieces of advice about starting projects is going to be contradictory based on your sources. it makes me wonder how many people get caught in a loop of trying to take ALL the advice, even when it would be impossible to do so.

sometimes ripping out your whole process and starting from the ground up is the best thing you can do, creatively, but in many circumstances, taking the pieces of advice which will most meaningfully help you redirect your existing skills whilst leaving behind the things that don't serve you? that's also a valid and worthwhile thing to do!

drawing on the knowledge and experience of others is an important practice whatever stage you're at in your life as a creator of things. learning new methods and techniques can help you develop your own practice and sharing knowledge is incredibly important. just remember that there are many ways to solve the same problem, and part of what makes your creations unique are your approaches as an individual. it is impossible to take all of the advice! do continue to seek it out, and also know that you're not disrespecting it by deciding it's not something which will help.

above all, keep creating stuff!

--- Eira xxx

[jakei95]

This will be the last update about the accusations against Nyx and me from last year and recent months.

VERSION EN ESPAÑOL:

I cannot force everyone to forgive or believe us, but I would like to provide a closure from our part on the events following Hopeless Peaches' false accusations last year, and a few more that have been reappearing this year, once more.

In recent months, we resumed communication with CrystalFlame, one of the victims of the Glitchtale server. Crystal acknowledged that the accusations against us for allegedly being sexual towards minors and bribing her to remain silent about our "crimes" were entirely fabricated by these people. It was never our intention to hide our past mistakes with money. The separate donations Nyx and I gave to Crystal were solely intended to help her.

Regarding the conversations on Skype in 2017, neither Nyx nor I ever forced the minors present to engage in sexual behavior for our entertainment, nor did we sexualize them in any way. There were inappropriate conversations between adults, in which they should not have been involved, and we recognize our mistake in being negligent and not caring enough about them. I must admit that Veir also disgusted me, and I reacted foolishly by not confronting him or by saying things he liked just to make him leave me alone. I deeply regret this. Although we have apologized to Crystal for this, I also want to apologize to the minors who were there, even if they don't want to know about this anymore, and to the entire community for this huge mistake. Since Nyx and I stopped using that chat short after our irl meeting that same year, plus our detachment to the members of GT, we have changed our views significantly both in public and in private, creating a healthy community for everyone. I will add more details later regarding my experiences with NSFW material, for which I have also been accused of being a depraved person.

I disagree with how Nyx tried to explain how these behaviors were so normalized, but he never intended to endorse the toxicity and unpunished crimes occurring in Latin culture. Nyx acknowledges this, and we discussed it again privately with Crystal. We apologize once more to our Latin members who might have been offended by this take, which could have been better explained. Nyx and I said a lot of things out of fear and frustration, which caused more harm and distress rather than solutions due to the explosive harassment we faced because of the false accusations by Hopeless Peaches and their group. I won't go into too many details because I have chosen to keep my mental health private, but this wave of harassment severely impacted my mental and physical health, and I am currently undergoing treatment to manage the aftermath.

However, I want to take full responsibility for causing Nyx to act out of emotion rather than with a clear mind in a desperate attempt to protect me, as Crystal ended up in a very complicated situation during the harassment wave created by Peaches, making her believe that our lives were in her hands and dependent on her choices. This was not only inappropriate but also unfair, considering Crystal was going through a lot at that time. Nyx and I poorly worded many things both publicly and privately. We should never have let our emotions take over while trying to defend ourselves. We could have handled the situation more maturely. None of these mistakes will be repeated ever again. Crystal has also admitted her mistakes. Many things would have taken a different path if dialogue had been the first option instead of public statements, but both sides have learned a lot.

With all this, I don't want to hear anything about Glitchtale, its creator, or its still-active members. Nor do I want to hear about Hopeless Peaches or their community, or what's left of it. My purpose on the internet is to entertain people with my art, and on the rare occasions I interact publicly, to maintain a calm and healthy environment, as I have been doing for years. My boundaries with fans are very strict and defined. It may sound ambitious or silly to many, but for a long time, I have wanted to make a difference and show that not all artists with a large audience are people who hide dark secrets and seek to harm others. I just want to tell stories and brighten people's days.

People have become used to seeing random individuals or public figures being exposed daily for horrible acts and behavior, which is very depressing. However, when those accusations are false, it is sometimes too late to undo the damage. No one likes to be pointed at and accused of something they didn't commit, especially when those accusations are serious, like harming another human being.

Some people today are confused and believe that I am actually Camila, and that Nyx is Veir, that my husband has been dating minors despite us being married, and that I defended my "pedophile" partner and protected other groomers. People are not only mistaking us for other individuals, but we also don't have anything to do with that other than the 2017 Skype chats. We have been put in some sort of black list from parts of the fandom due to misinformation or because some people seek an excuse to justify their dislike for us by wishing we had harmed real children. This is sickening, sickeing and frustrating if you actually think about the victims not only in fandoms but everywhere. So, please, I beg you to distinguish between names and what has actually happened. Even if you don't like us, don't seek or wish for us to be monsters just to feel proud of yourselves.

I feel I could regain some peace in my heart by having the opportunity to talk to Crystal about all what happened and ending in good terms. This should be the end of the whole controversy regarding the Skype Chat and the GT Server.

Now I would also like to take the opportunity to talk about other accusations still aimed at me to this day, which I once explained on a Twitter thread that was eventually deleted due to unnecesary arguments between fans. I'm being accused of being a horrible and irredeemable person for drawing a comic in my early years in the fandom that insinuated a non-consensual act between Cross and Dream.

Before any explanation, I want to emphasize that I still feel immense regret and shame for creating that nsfw comic, even if I didn't feel comfortable doing so, I still made the decision as an adult and shouldn't have done it in a space where there were minors and people who might find that material triggering. Even though it happened many years ago, it was not right, and I will apologize as many times as necessary.

I haven't had any contact with the creator of Dreamtale since 2017, so I'm unaware of her current viewpoint about this topic in general, but one thing is certain: both of us don't want to be associated with that ship between our characters and want to move on. We want it as far away from us as possible. I don't want anybody to harass her over this situation.

During that time, I was in an unstable relationship with the creator of Dreamtale, with whom I used to roleplay privately. This, along with being pressured to make the ship "canon", led me to create the comics for that ship. Among them was the infamous scene for which I'm accused of supporting rape. This content and private interactions reached a point where the entire situation made me uncomfortable, along with the toxic attitudes in our relationship, I ended up closing the blog, though not before writing a summary of what would happen next in the story -that didn't have any other sexual moments, to clarify-, simply a closure for those who enjoyed the comic. Not long after, we broke up.

After this experience, I began to realize that any NSFW content, both fictional and real, made me very uncomfortable. This is connected to future members of the fandom, like Veir, who tried to sexualize me, and later, ex-friends whom I wanted to please for their support during my growth as a content creator by drawing them private NSFW commissions. I ignored my discomfort, believing I was doing the right thing and that I could trust them, but what happened later finally made me understand that I personally cannot tolerate any of this content.

This group of people shared these private commissions among themselves. One of these people was someone I considered a close friend and was even my Discord moderator but began abusing their power towards other members, trying to escape the consequences just because of our friendship. They even tried to offer me money to remove a character from another artist who would appear in my animation as a cameo, just because they both had personal issues. I decided to end our friendship because I saw no changes or improvements on their part and I felt i was being used as a power tool for them.

It wasn't long after this that I found an alt account of them, posting these private NSFW drawings, tagging me to attract attention as a form of revenge for cutting ties with them (They also got Nyx's phone number to trying to get in contact with me despite what they were doing). These images spread last year among a few people who, unaware of the background, used them as a reason to question me as an artist. However I explained the rest of the story before it became more public, and I appreciate that they listened to me first, however, the damage was already done.

In March of this year, I made a thread on Twitter explaining this and my reason for not supporting or consuming NSFW content. I want to stay away from this whole debate. I don't want my words to be used to attack others. My reasons for not enjoying this are because I had people around me who caused me a lot of harm with this matter, it triggers me, and I don't like any sexual topics around me, even as an adult reaching my 30s. I simply don't like it, I'm not interested, and I want my feelings to be respected. I'm very aware that more than half of my audience are minors, and I know how to behave and what to show in my art, but there are still others looking for any excuse to call me or my husband horrible things. It has happened before with accusations of transphobia for making Frisk and Chara from Xtale male instead of non-binary as they are in the canon version. I have been called a pedophile for portraying Frisk and Muffet from XTale in an innocent romantic context, even though there is no age difference, just because is not following, again, the canon (which with all honesty, I'm not aware if it has been confirmed she is a child or not). I have been accused of racism because of the characters' skin color, and so on.

Being hated in a fandom as an artist with a big following is supposed to be normal, but, to what extent?

I know I should ignore those comments and move on, but I still don't understand why it hurts so much that people want to discredit my efforts as an artist and as a person by believing they have found some dark secret in me… I really can't understand, I just want to live in peace.

My art is my only escape from negative thoughts. Nyx is my only support in real life. I have been working on how to deal with online criticism and harassment, but it is really hard when people tell lies in order to ruin a life, especially when those lies try to make us look like disgusting human beings. This puts me in a lot of distress, mostly because I hate conflict and prefer to be left alone. I want to be a role model in this community by not getting involved with problematic people and toxic environments. Even if there are people who don't like my work, I want to show that there is still a bit of decency and common sense in the art community.

For this reason, this will be the last time I talk about this because I want to focus on what makes me, my husband, and my audience happy. I want to set an example, and I want people to read this, try to understand our position, and give us a chance.

Once again, we deeply regret the mistakes we made in the past.

[myun-saidthoughts]

🧷 ✧ ˚. ᵎᵎ 🎀 8th + 12th House Synastry Astrology Observations:

I have known this boy since summer of 2021 and our dynamic to this day is still weird and unique. So I want to state specific scenarios that have occurred between us.

(I'll update with more observations as time goes on)

His Moon and Venus are in my 8th house, these planets make many tight aspects to my inner planets and those planets also aspect my 5th and 7th house ruler.

My Moon is in his 12th house and it also tightly squares his Neptune, my Moon also aspects his Lilith, 5th and 8th house ruler.

🌸 Staring at one another is very likely. The more avoidant you are the more uncomfortable you may feel with how reactive/how easy it is to care.

🌸 When things are romantic or there's been consistent flirting (without commitment) you two might share this unsaid loyalty to one another. At outings or parties you may make sure to not speak to other people while they are in the room.

Ex: Once at a party a girl was hugging him, the second I made eye contact with him he pushes the girl away, runs in the opposite direction, then comes up to me 5 minutes later to ask me a random question.

Ex. Once he was dating a girl and as I walked up near them (they were dancing), he pushes her away and waves at me and he's done this in other occasions.

Ex. When things were good with us (meaning zero commitment but felt good because of cute conversation) I made sure to not give other boys attention when he is in the room; it felt like a innate reaction within me to do that?

🌸 When we don't appease one another through the above examples the relationship feels more intense or more emotionally charged. It's like us being severely independent and careless with one another increases the tension and somehow creates more awkwardness. For me it feels like i'm fighting my own deep wishes; my heart vs my ego. (We have a Libra MC/Moon/Venus in our composite chart)

🌸 I don't even have his phone number and it feels like I am his ex.

🌸 I have never hung out with him one and one and we've never had sex yet it feels like we have had an intimate intense relationship.

Story: Throughout the years we would always run into each other and he was always more afraid of commitment, he has had two girlfriends but for some reason he's never pursued me on his own. Instead he stares and gets jealous when his friends talk to me.

🌸 Jealousy is very likely even if you're not a jealous person; if you're attracted to them you will get jealous over them/if their attention is towards another.

🌸 Once at a party I walk up to him to say hi but I had to leave the second I got there and as I hugged him he blurted "You're leaving?!" Just by my hug he knew I was upset to go without me saying anything.

🌸 Once at a different outing he was talking to another girl and I kept staring. As I saw them talk I then abruptly (and in a sad manner) walked away and he unknowingly shouted "Wait!"

🌸 What he feels; I feel. When there's an emotional disconnect I can feel the energy shift.

🌸 Staring is so likely. I can't help it. I just have to look at him. Gun to my head my eyes are locked in.

🌸 There's intense expectations that you hold for one another. You expect a certain energy, action, reaction or behavior from them; when it's not met you will feel a low.

🌸 When you are with them and the expectations are met, the high they can give you feels like a drug. I was once high for three days off a cute interaction we had.

🌸 I always wished he would just pull me in and kiss me, I once verbally told this to my sister; I said "I want him to want me so bad that he just grabs me, pulls me in and kisses me." Weeks later, while he was drunk he word for word restated that exact same sentence to me while holding my face. (He said "the second I saw you all I wanted to do is grab you, pull you in and kiss you, can i kiss you?)

🌸 I sometimes can't tell which my feelings are mine vs his. Its cloudy and I ask myself if what I feel is what he feels all the time.

🌸 You'll feel their thoughts and then talk yourself out of knowing "their mind," you'll brush it off and say how illogical it is to "know" what they are feeling.

🌸 The relationship is a constant tennis match of caring to letting go, sometimes you're so certain with moving on and then something, anything can pull you back in.

🌸 I have posted on my social media certain songs, playlists, quotes that were covert messages for him.

🌸 I carefully curate my snapchat stories in hopes it'll make him think of me or want me.

🌸 Idealizing is very common. He places me on this impossible pedestal, and I have said out loud that he "is everything I could ever wish for" and I don't even know him!

🌸 If there's a miscommunication or mishap there will be this deep need to fix the dynamic between you two.

Once my sister yelled at him because he was avoiding conversation (as he does usually) and 2 weeks later he throws a party. I know it sounds insane that he would have a party just to fix the weird dynamic but when I arrived he and his roommate made eye contact and he looked at his roommate saying "Walk with me so I can say hi to them" and the roommate knew immediately and smirked at me while passing.

🌸 I pull open a soft spot in him, I can just tell when he looks at me. Especially when we were talking more.

🌸 It feels safe when I hug him, once he just laid his head on my shoulder and that behavior came so naturally from him.

🌸 When his ego isn't involved he is more open with his feelings.

🌸 Once I grabbed his hand and he looked into my eyes and leaned down to kiss me; it felt so effortless as if we've done this before (we haven't).

🌸 I am SO emotionally unavailable, I always worry about PDA but in this case I dont care who see's me, I openly and willingly showcase my desire and it's so easy to do so. I just don't feel sick or worried about others seeing me be romantic with him, with others I fear when people perceive me with a boy romantically.

🌸 Not saying hi or not talking to him feels so much worse than if I went out of my way to say hi.

🌸 I always worry about making him feel pressured to say hi, I want him to feel ease with me and not worry or be burdened; he feels the same way towards me. (He's told me he doesn't want to pressure me to say hi)

🌸 In recent events and due to zero contact or communication I overly acted nonchalant and I acted like I didn't care but still that is the furthest of how I truly feel. Outwardly I avoided eye contact to make him feel more comfortable or less burdened but it eats at me. I act like I don't want him (to make the connection seem less intense) but I deeply do. He acted the same way towards me and mirrored my behavior.

🌸 I feel like I have to act carefree even when i'm not receiving his attention to make the connection feel less intense; but my body and facial reactions say otherwise no matter how hard I try.

🌸 One night at a party I impulsively went up to him and kissed him without words. He then looked at me, pulled me in and kissed me again. (Again with no words being said to either of us)

🌸 So many unsaid thoughts, feelings and desires. Never once have we ever verbalized our feelings for one another or about our connection and I have known him for 3 years.

🌸 Other people can see and feel the tension between us two.

🌸 I dream of him almost every single night (I am the planet person in the 12th house synastry).

🌸 My dreams showcase his soft and loving manner even when if in "reality" his actions are cold and dismissive. I receive such soft attention in my dreams and I don't understand why; it doesn't mirror his behavior in my waking life therefore I can't understand if it's my deep wishes or his subconscious wishes.

🌸 I had dream of him telling me "You make me feel more than any other girl I've met" and even in my dream I was confused by that statement.

🌸 The second I don't say hi or vice versa tension rises and it becomes more awkward in some manner. It's like not acknowledging one another causes this weird tense dynamic.

🌸 His ex hated me because she knew how he has liked me first. I found out she still viewed me as a threat to their relationship even when I didn't speak to him for 9 months?

🌸 Once he was blatantly drunk and after not seeing him for almost a year he still confessed how attracted he is towards me. He newly broke up with his ex (who hated me) and weeks after he confessed his attraction.

🌸 I have never dated him, and he gets more jealous with me than anyone else he's romantically officially been with. When his friends talk to me he feels threatened, angry and acts annoyed.

🌸 Once his friend was drunk and was non-stop talking to me saying how cute I was, 2 minutes later he runs up, grabs him by the neck and tells him to stop. The friend then avoided me after.

Story: Since he was jealous (and since we're not dating) he tried acting like he didn't care about that occurrence so you know what he does? I stare at him, he stares at me, then walks my way, stops, and turns at the girl next to me to start a conversation. Right. In. Front. Of. ME. Then I walk up to him after and he AVOIDS me. He hates that he gets jealous so to counteract that feeling he acts overly dismissive to "decrease" the emotional charge with us. It doesn't work.

🌸 We mirror each other's behaviors constantly.

🌸 He views me as this "perfect" person but that stops him from ever choosing me because he feels that he can't live up to the partner I deserve. (How do I know this? I just do)

🌸 The second and I mean very second there's a emotional block between you two the deep seated desire for them becomes less intense.

Ex: If you also share 12th house synastry with them, parts of their actions will feel like subtle hints that are meant for you. In essence, you want to believe that you are more important to them than others and you feel like you are. But once something comes to light or if you were shown that what you thought to be wasn't the case; this realization creates emotional distance and the desire for them (in that moment) shrinks. It feels as if the importance that you thought your presence gave them suddenly means nothing, and that feeling creates a instant "I'm never speaking to them again mentality"

🌸 With 8th and 12th house synastry, there’s a part of you that feels you’ll never compare to anyone else they encounter. Even if you two never dated, there’s a deep sense that the way they feel when they’re with you is unmatched and it's something you intuitively will feel. It's likely that there will be no set actions or verbal affirmations to confirm this knowing.

🌸 The emotional charge you feel when they are in the room with you can be so intense others around you can feel the unspoken desires you two share.

🌸 The intensity of this connection swings between unspoken loyalty and complete avoidance—one extreme driven by the fear of showing disinterest, and the other by the fear of being a burden. If you’re not preoccupied with displaying your loyalty to them in a room full of people, you find yourself avoiding eye contact or minimizing conversation to maintain a facade of “normalcy”—a normalcy that doesn’t truly exist in this connection.

🌸 I’ve noticed that I tend to trigger his jealous tendencies. A few weeks ago, I was at a bar, and at that point, we hadn’t even said hello to each other. I happened to be standing next to a random guy (it was a small table), and he immediately asked his friend who the guy next to me was. The friend, who we both know, turned around, looked at me, and then answered his question.

Another time, we were at a party, and again, we hadn’t really spoken at all. He looked over at a random guy and said something, to which the guy responded, “Ohhh, this girl?” while pointing at me. He just froze and didn’t turn back. It’s like he talks about me to everyone else—just not to me.

🌸 If you are very physically attracted to them, the want or desire for them can arise VERY quickly. You could verbally say "I'm over them" but the second they look visually attractive or if their actions cause emotional closeness, the want for them will reappear again.

🌸 I saw him last night and he was with another girl, when he is drunk he becomes more accustomed to not showing attention to other girls when I'm around. We made eye contact and he backed away from her but it was like he doesn't even realize or understand why he does these things? We've never dated and we haven't talked at allll in basically months. I miss him a lot and wish I had the chance or courage to talk to him more. I can't even remember if I said hi. :(

[mushroomates]

gimli headcanons:

likes doing laundry. finds it soothing

history nerd!! loves reading old tombs/biographies of his ancestors

is incredibly intelligent. beats frodo in chess. would beat gandalf but gandalf cheats. has been in a stalemate with aragorn for two and a half years.

well mannered but chooses to forgo his politeness to make a point. especially around elves.

does NOT like horses. not just riding them, which is canon, but actually dislikes the animal itself. the reasons why include (but are not limited to) :

he does not like being not on ground. he does not have a fear of heights so much as a fear of… feet not on ground. as evidenced by refusal to jump, treehouses, and well, horses

he does not like their faces. they are long and have eyes on the side like prey. gimli thinks this is deceiving as horses are very large and can kick in someone’s skull. not his skull.

gimli believes that in a one on one match with a horse, he could easily win. he has thought of several, very specific, scenarios of this and has a detailed plan of attack should this situation occur.

they so easily turned against their home for an evil overlord (read: sauron stole all the black horses from rohan) and therefore cannot be trusted. as a rule, anything that willing you let you ride it cannot be trusted. they can’t be satisfied with this life. they are plotting something.

believes he would be great at drums. it’s just hitting things hard and he’s pretty strong.

ok, another thing about horses: they are fragile to a ridiculous extent. you breath wrong and it breaks. they have bad bones and bad blood flow in their legs, and their legs are all that they’re used for. he doesn’t understand why humans invested so much time into horses when they’re genetically bad at what they are meant to do. he’d feel bad for the horses if they weren’t so awful.

drinks coffee, not tea

takes great with the up keeping of his gear. he sharpens his axes, polishes his boots, shines his armor and waxes his mustache. that’s not gear, but he takes great pride in looking groomed and caring for his belongings.

has an axe for every occasion. battle axe? do you want throwing or slashing. a day on the town? have you seen this intricately carved masterpiece that also is a weapon? digging a hole? PICKAXE. cutting a cake? how about an axe???

hates the rain because it ruins his hair and beard. also loves the rain because it ruins legolas’s hair and clothes.

will eat anything. has a great tolerance for spice. contrary to popular belief, dwarves are not shy of seasoning but are very cautious around other races in fear of poisoning their friends

will also eat some rocks. salty is his favorite (halite, hanksite, glauberite) but also likes to add chunks of chalcanthite to his food for a slightly sweet yet metalic flavor. this is also slightly (SLIGHTLY) poisonous as evidenced by sharing his trail mix with boromir

also calls dirt the “local seasoning”

will taste dirt to try and get a feeling for the land. this tells him the acidity, weather, possible wildlife, and also pisses off legolas

actaully genuinely likes the taste of dirt. (note: if you desire to eat clay/dirt that is a symptom of iron deficiency. for gimli, he eats spoonfuls of the stuff like their supplements because as a kid it was fed to him like multivitamins)

OK SO HEAR ME OUT: lack of sunlight can cause really low hemoglobin and ferritin (a blood protein that contains iron) sooo being constantly in dark caves can cause some forms of iron deficiency. because dwarves are conscious of their young, dwarf children often grow up not often being in direct sunlight.

the solution? dirt. dirt contains iron and other tasty minerals that are good for the body. charcoal has natural antioxidants. so does clay. am i saying that momma gimli (unnamed) fed her son ash and clumps of dirt? yes. also bits of broken pottery. it’s good of the immune system.

fr tho clay/dirt/charcoal are the dwarven multivitamins. you have a tummy-ache? here, have a rock. i truly believe this was scientifically proven by dwarves and only FOR dwarves (plz do not eat dirt)

fuckin loves mushrooms. has a mushroom log at home. whenever dwarves find some fungai in a cave they go feral

likes dogs. thinks it’s great that they dig holes. thinks it’s fantastic that the bury things in holes. absolutes loves when they get muddy, and then shake off all water and dirt all over you.

when he came back home with the name lockbearer, a lot of the dwarves thought it was really cool and he has some sort of elven puzzle that requires a code to unlock something. imagine their surprise when he rocks up and is like: no, even better. HAIRS. three of them.

enjoys making mudpies- made them as a kid with his cousins, (mostly with rock slurry) and continues to, even even as an adult.

made them on the fellowship with the hobbits. taught them all about the best types of dirt and the water-to-soil- ratio needed.

while cutting up slices of his pie, he offered one to boromir, who in good nature, took it, clearly thinking it was just part of the bit.

poor boromir was locked in a stalemate after gimli cut his own slice, and began eating it.

to his credit, boromir did brave a few bites, but had to stop once he nearly had a mouthful of maggots

“protein”

gimli is like crazy good at hair. can braid quickly and efficiently in elaborate styles

picked up eleven hair style techniques in lorien (quicker than legolas) and was forced to relay them to the elf through twine as there is no way he’s letting grubby elf fingers to touch his glorious mane that’s been decades in the making

would ask for a drink “on the rocks” and get slightly upset if it did not come back with actual rocks

[jesters-throne]

More Max content!

This took 5ever but I'm super happy with it, all things considered. The amount of times I had to reference the j3 book was insane.

Enjoy a bit of lore on how Max and Ford met from Ford's perspective! :)

Click for quality and transcript under the cut!

Credit to Anomalis for the Tendrilis font and @/tsunamihomes for the Ford font!

Page 1

My Research Partner

I have been logging my unusual findings in Gravity Falls for quite some time now. However, I've neglected to log the finding of my current research partner! Who would have thought that someone else would be conducting the same research as I in this town? Not me, that's for certain.

My first sighting of him was in the local library. Admittedly, I have a habit of borrowing an, in his words, "egregious" amount of books at one time-something the librarian, Mrs. Softcovur, never seems to mind, but M certainly does.

Our first interaction was over [crossed out: several] an overdue book. M is a stickler for punctuality, something I often lack in. Of course, I apologized and assured him I would bring it in tomorrow as soon as possible. All he had to say was "bless your heart," which I've come to find out means the exact opposite depending on the context it's used in.

Our first meeting outside of his workplace occurred in one of the many forests of Gravity Falls and gave me quite the scare! His footsteps are...eerily silent. It just so happened that he was conducting a bit of fieldwork in the same area I was. Attempting to, at least. M had his nose buried in a leatherbound journal littered with sticky notes and bumped right into me! The scream he let out could put a banshee to shame, truly.

I couldn't believe my ears when he explained that he was researching the anomalies of the town! How wrong I was to think that I was alone in my endeavors. With much enthusiasm, I asked him to join me in my own research. I'll admit that it took a bit of convincing but, luckily, he agreed.

Page 2

These past few weeks have been remarkably insightful. M has ethological knowledge that is not only intriguing but proving to be quite helpful, at least for the more beastial oddities. I'm even more optimistic about my Grand Unified Theory of Weirdness now that I've got the aid of someone with similar passions. He insisted that I needn't credit him for his contributions but I'll have none of that. Together, I believe we can make history! His efforts won't be in vain, not on my watch

Notes Next To Ford's Drawings

Rocks: I can't remember a time he hasn't had at least one rock in his pocket. I've started a collection of rocks he's given me.

Portrait: Bears a striking resemblance to George Harrison sans mustache! [In Tendrilis: "You're a terrible flirt. ~ M"]

Pile of Hair: Sheds like a DOG!!! [crossed out: Possible lycanthrope gene?]

Sketchbook: He's so guarded about the damn thing!

Snic Snacs: Carries these around with him wherever he goes [crossed out: and consumes them at an alarming rate.] (I steal a handful on occasion when he isn't looking.)

[iamnmbr3]

you know what's sooo stupid to me that it's almost bound to drive me crazy?!

The fact that whenever i see you sharing tom riddle metas about how traumatized he was and trying to look from his pov, i think that FUCKING MAIN VILLAIN, lunatic voldemort who was a reason for so many deaths and did everything to achieve his end is vastly understood. bellatrix, the cruelest witch(after umbridge lol), who knows nothing but voldemort has a not lil fandom

BUT jkr says Draco doesn't deserve fans' love & THERE IS NO GOOD INSIDE HIM (says about the guy who despite his environment and his own desire couldn't be bad & cruel..even if coward, still he didn't do several things in spite of his fears) so we shouldn't be that attached to him!!!!

And many people agree!!!! Like is Draco the only bad guy here? Is he actually a bad guy?

Like🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯

(i don't have any problem with you guys talking about tom riddle or bellatrix having fans, just the injustice of it makes me insane)

First off, thanks for your patience in waiting for an answer to this ask! Second of all, I think two things are going on here. On the one hand, we have the fandom response to the series. On the other hand we've got JKR's response. While it's true that Tom Riddle and Bellatrix both have their fans (most of whom acknowledge the problematic things their faves have done - and indeed find their flawed actions and complexity to be part of their appeal) within fandom spaces the same is very much true of Draco. He is an extremely popular character within fandom. On AO3 he is the third most tagged character (after Harry and Hermione), drarry is the number one most written about ship, and dramione comes in at number 3. So I think in fandom spaces Draco gets a lot of attention and there's generally an interest in and understanding of the fact that he's a complex and grey character and not by any means a one-note bad guy.

However, JK Rowling does not seem to share that view at all. She's been very dismissive of his character and of fans who like him on a number of occasions and indeed seems irritated by his popularity - even though it is driven by writing choices SHE made. She claims Draco never got a redemption arc even though she herself wrote that he ultimately changed his opinions and behaviors...aka had a redemption arc. She seems to be someone who has a great deal of trouble admitting she was wrong and who is also very threatened by anyone having a different interpretation or view of something than what she wants. So I think she's especially bothered by people responding to Draco - particularly because she's on such shaky ground. Most Bellatrix fans admit she was a die-hard Death Eater - and indeed that's something they embrace about her character - so that's probably not as threatening to JKR as people pointing out that Draco changed his mind is. I think she also hates drarry.

And yeah it strikes me as really unfair that she singles out Draco fans and claims anyone who likes him is just a girl who is confused due to being attracted to the actor (wow. way to be heteronormative, misogynistic, and a misandrist all in one go). Which is bizarre and problematic on so many levels and also especially weird when she has no problem with Snape fans or Regulus fans and doesn't seem to think that a similar problem could occur with people thinking Tom Riddle had a redemption arc just bc the character is canonically attractive and played by an actor generally considered to be attractive in the second film for example.

[yuesya]

Twin au anon again, it would be neat if cursed spirit au Shiki was attached to Satoru in an adjacent way to Rika and Yuta, maybe she grows with Satoru and protects him as much as she can, maybe she gives him an additional technique like the one she would have had, I'd love to hear more of your thoughts on this!

As far as the wider clan and the rest of the world is concerned, Gojo Satoru was born on December 7th. This was a truly joyous occasion for the Gojo Clan, the long-awaited birth of a child blessed with both the Six Eyes and Limitless-

Only a select few within the clan were aware that this event had been marred by the birth of a twin sister.

An ill omen, in the jujutsu world. Twins were seen as one singular entity. Neither would reach their full potential if this were not... corrected.

On December 7th, Gojo Satoru was born.

On December 14th, his younger twin was killed.

Muneyoshi was the one who'd committed the despicable deed with his own two hands. It was despicable, but necessary, in order to ensure the Gojo Clan's future. He'd held down the pillow over the infant girl's face and counted One two threefourfive-

...

By the time the infant had finally stopped struggling, Muneyoshi's hands had long grown numb.

... It had been the right thing to do. Muneyoshi had done the right thing. Hisayasu-sama had nodded solemnly when Muneyoshi reported back to him the next day, informing him of the cursed twin's death.

"Well done, Muneyoshi. Your family's sacrifice will be remembered."

There were no grave markers. No incense was burned, and no offerings were made. There could not be any tangible traces of any imperfections tainting the 'honored one.' As far as anyone was concerned, Satoru was Muneyoshi's only child.

Gojo Shiki did not exist. Could not exist.

("Muneyoshi, what did you do?! You monster, you wretched excuse of a husband, give me back my dAuGHTER-!")

...

It had been the right thing to do.

Gojo Satoru grows up brilliant and powerful. He is everything the Gojo Clan could ever have wanted in a clan heir, easily mastering his lessons with effortless grace. In retrospect, Muneyoshi should've become suspicious of this so much sooner, but it hadn't occurred to him at the time. He'd only taken it as a sign that he had done the right thing, severing the weights that would drag Satoru down.

What a fool he'd been.

In the end, Muneyoshi discovers it by complete accident. One night, he wakes up in the dark emptiness of his own room, feeling parched. On his way to fetch himself a glass of water, he notices a light coming from Satoru's room, which gives him pause.

Sleep is important, particularly for growing children. As much as it warms his heart to see his son working so hard to meet the expectations of his clan, it wouldn't do for-

"Yadda yadda ya, who cares about who killed whoever in the Muromachi Period?"

The man pauses his footsteps, frowning in confusion.

That was... Satoru's voice, there was no doubt about it. But why was he talking aloud to himself in the middle of the night, instead of sleeping? That was-

"I guess you have a point, but whatever." A frustrated, explosive breath. "Ha? 'Just go to sleep, if you're not interested in reading?' Hey, why do you think I'm staying up late in the first place? You're always asleep during the day!"

What?

A chill runs down Muneyoshi's spine. He can't sense anyone else in Satoru's room; the boy is sitting alone at his table. Then, who is he... talking to?

"Don't apologize, I know you're a little sleepyhead." Satoru's voice is affectionate, in a manner that's entirely uncharacteristic of him. "I guess it's a good thing that at least one of us is interested in this rubbish, so we can at least get lessons over with quickly. Counting on you for the next test, Shiki!"

Muneyoshi, only a half-step from opening the door to his son's room and demanding answers, freezes entirely.

That name. The name that's never been spoken aloud in this house, or in the Gojo Clan, the name that Satoru should not know-

Oh gods.

Oh dear gods, please don't let this be true. Please let this all just be a fevered nightmare. The implications otherwise...

(Is this the retribution for the sin of murdering his own daughter?)

Horror seizes Muneyoshi's throat in a tight grip at the thought, heavy and suffocating. His hand as it rests on the thin doorframe separating him from his children trembles viciously with dread terror.

... He doesn't have the courage to open it.

[musicalmoritz]

Do you have any Kousano headcanons?

YAYYYYYY FINALLY A BSD SHIP ASK :D SAPPHIC BSD SPECIFICALLY YES :D

• Okay since BSD isn’t my current hyperfixation this might be tricky BUT I was hyperfixated on it for like half a year not too long ago so I still have loads of info stored up in my brain to be dumped out

• Their first time meeting was when Kouyou was held captive by the Agency during the Guild Arc. They had heard of each other prior to that and being from rival organizations, they went in expecting to be enemies

• Their first impression was a rough one, but there was an underlying thread of chemistry. They matched each other’s banter very well, despite being used to having the final word at their respective organizations. It was a welcomed change

• And they’re both raging lesbians so like…hot lady who is my enemy…many thoughts occur

• It’s very much an enemies AND lovers dynamic, they meet up for secret rendezvous and then fight each other during times of conflict

• The tragic part is that they both like each other, that’s why it’s become an ongoing thing. That’s why they start going on secret dates in disguise, although they both claim to not enjoy it

• In another life they would’ve been soulmates, but their conflicting ideologies and rival positions force them to be enemies (because I like to make things overly romantic, sue me)

• They have a lot of insignificant things in common- favorite desserts, favorite books, etc. Those are important, but they’re also similar personality-wise and with their backstories

• I imagine Yosano dates around a lot and this makes Kouyou insanely jealous. They aren’t official so she technically can’t have a problem with it but it still gets under her skin

• So Yosano’s like “hey if you want to be exclusive just say that, there are no rules to this secret relationship thing” but Kouyou is too stubborn to admit she likes Yosano that much

• Yosano initially takes a very “your trauma is not my business” approach to their differing jobs but as things get more serious she starts to develop a slight savior complex. She goes from being completely unattached to way too attached. She wants to show Kouyou the light the way Ranpo and Fukuzawa did for her

• Speaking of which, there’s only one person who knows about their situationship and that’s Ranpo. He figured it out himself and mentioned it casually to Yosano one day, nearly giving her a heart attack. She knew he would find out eventually but it was very sudden. At least she has someone to vent to when things get especially confusing

• Higuchi and Gin eventually find out too because they catch them at the same lesbian bar

• Pretty soon it becomes an open secret

• I like to imagine there’s a big moment of confrontation between the PM and Kouyou that goes down exactly like the “how long have you been fucking Nate Jacobs?” scene from Euphoria

• Kouyou addresses Yosano as “Doctor” in public and “Akiko” in private

• Kouyou likes to use her mafia money to send Yosano anonymous gifts on a whim. Yosano always knows who they’re from

• Yosano’s favorite physical trait of Kouyou’s is her hair, Kouyou likes Yosano’s sadistic smile

• Speaking of which, Yosano definitely appreciates having a relationship where they get to beat the shit out of each other on occasion. It keeps the spark alive

• But on dates or in settings that are generally more intimate, Yosano is a total gentleman. She def gives all her girls the princess treatment. Kouyou is used to being the one to spoil women so this makes her very flustered

• They had one big fight about Mori and ever since then they made a silent agreement never to bring him up. When things are tense he becomes an elephant in the room

• In traditional “ADA member has a PM-related secret” fashion, Kunikida was the last to find out about their relationship

• This is so completely random but they remind me of Kermit and Miss Piggy. Yosano is Kermit

• Kouyou pretends to be severely injured every time the PM and ADA team up so she has an excuse to see Yosano

• Yosano sends Kouyou pictures of particularly bad crime scenes or injuries at random to jump scare her

• Kouyou likes classical music and Yosano is a metalhead

That’s all I can think of for now, thank you for the ask!!

[yandere-fics]

(Thank you sooooo much, I really doubted anyone would care about my writing this much, it's incredible! I hope you don't mind but I chose just a really bad cold as the sickness. I really really enjoyed writing this, let me know your thoughts!)

♡ How They Take Care Of A Sick Darling ♡

♡ Nora is not the best when it comes to caring for her darling, even when she was mortal she was in tip top shape so she is panicking a little bit when she wakes up next to you and you're unable to get up out of bed from how sick you are. Are you dying, does she have to go find The Boss immediately to prevent your death? When she finds out you're not sick she calms down but not by much considering her reason for living is still incapacitated in her bed and there is nothing she can do to help. ♡

♡ If she's not there and returns to you being sick then it's even worse! She needs camera's set up in the apartment and she's upset she hasn't been a good enough girlfriend for you to automatically call her the moment there's a problem, she promises to remedy this issue as soon as she can so eventually your first instinct will be to call her, she'll do better! ♡

♡ The Boss will just have to put up with her not doing her job for a week or two until she's entirely sure you're better. Nora is not a good cook, she's barely passable, which reminds her she really needs to practice for in the future in case you ever do want her to cook for you, for now though you will have to deal with her ordering food for you and spoon feeding you herself, don't you even dare try to pick up the spoon, she will swat your hand away and force you to allow her to care for you. ♡

♡ She'll prop a million pillows under your back because laying down all day long can't be good for you though if you insist on laying down all day, instead she'll roll you on you back and give you a massage to guarantee you don't get any bedsores, even though you literally haven't been laying there for very long at all. She's doing her best to not press down too hard but in all her stress she still winds up pressing down a bit hard. ♡

♡ Once you have recovered she's not letting you out until she feels like you have enough layers on because she can't risk you falling victim to these stupid mortal illnesses. Especially when The Boss refuses to give her any more days off for awhile so she wouldn't be there to take care of you as intensely next time and while The Boss did offer to send a doctor for you, Nora really doesn't trust having anyone else touch you. ♡

♡ Sawyer is very bad at this because she can't use her powers to get rid of something as minor as a cold. If it were something worse then she could snap it away but doing that for something minor carried the risk of accidentally messing things up severely so instead she was forced to watch you suffer while she could do nothing to stop it. She would have to get you on a strict regimen of vitamins and things like that quickly so this could never occur again. ♡

♡ She already has cameras set up in the penthouse for occasions like this but she still feels awful that she didn't check the cameras for an hour coming back to see you lay in bed sick. She's out of the office so quick, not bothering to tell anyone why she was leaving for the day or giving them any instructions, once she's back at the penthouse then she'll figure out what she's going to do, for now she has to be by your side. ♡

♡ Sawyer can't just take a break for this so you're coming to the office with her. Don't worry she already called her people to make them put a bed in her office and there will be doctors there waiting to take care of you under her command. Highly trained doctors who know to be very careful or they will suffer a fate much worse than death. ♡

♡ Any touching will be completed by her at the instruction of the doctors, if you must be rolled over to adjust the sheets or you need a massage to help your aching joints, the doctors must tell her to do it and if they dare to try to do it themselves she will strike them down. This is the first time she's really taking breaks from her work to eat because she has to take a break to spoon feed you, there's no way she would consider allowing the doctors to do something so intimate for you. She's very attentive, she's just also very busy so she's trying very hard to balance her two responsibilities right now. ♡

♡ Once you're better she's getting a nutritionist and a fitness coach so they can advise her on what vitamins and things she needs to get for you in order to boost your immune system. If they can't help her make sure that you never get sick again then she'll pull some strings with the elves to get immune boosting items to ensure your health is at peak condition, she's never going to allow this to happen again although she actually didn't mind it too much. Caring for you was pleasant and she liked the bonding experience but not to the detriment of your own health. ♡

♡ Theanna is very good at this considering she was not the heir to the throne her whole life so when anything went wrong she cared for herself and never received a single bit of help on anything so when she was sick she had to sneak the medicines that her siblings with more backers were allowed to receive. Compared to that, caring for you with all her wealth and power at her disposal is a breeze so she's not stressing herself out. It's only a mild cold anyways plus it makes you so cute and weak for her. ♡

♡ Theanna is appalled to leave a meeting and have the head maid inform her that her favorite maid is sick. While she's grateful for the head maid caring for you while Theanna was busy, she would have rather she just barged into the meeting room and let Theanna know immediately. That's a new rule, from now on if anyone has news pertaining to her darling, they must come to her instantly, it does not matter where she is or what she's doing, they better tell her. ♡

♡ She can take a break whenever she damn well pleases, her advisors will simply have to put up with dealing with her crappy handwriting telling them how she wants them to handle everything for the day. It's super cute to see you squirm and whine about how she shouldn't take a day off on your account. You're so worried about how improper it is for the crown princess to take a day off all for a simple maid and she simply shushes you and questions if you're disobeying her orders. ♡

♡ She insists on doing everything for you even though she could just as easily get one of the maids or doctors to treat you. Instead she simply makes them deliver the medicine to the door and get the fuck away. She can't let them inside the room because she wants to be the only one who knows what you look like when you're so weak and vulnerable. In this state she can finally care for you the way she wants to without all your silly whining that it's improper and whatnot. ♡

♡ When you've recovered she's a bit bummed out that she can't push you around anymore and you won't let her take care of you again. She would have thought that getting sick would have helped you to realize how nice it is for her to take care of you. Well even if you won't let her continue to baby you once you're feeling better, she's going to insist on taking care of you because now she's realized how nice it feels to care for you and there's not a damn thing you can do to stop her. ♡

♡ Abigail is bad at this. Her family never gets sick, her bloodline is very strong plus where their manor is situated, is the perfect moderate weather all year long so even the civilians rarely get colds and such. She has seen people get sick since her arrival in the capital but she doesn't socialize much and her knights usually just walk any illness off and she never cares to pay enough attention so she wouldn't notice if they were sick anyways. She notices you're sick the moment your stance is even slightly off though. ♡

♡ If she returns from an important meeting to discover you are sick she will freak out that none of the other recruits stopped you from training. Sure she makes everyone else work through their sickness but you are obviously different so they should have known there's no way she would permit you to remain here while you are ill. She understands why they didn't inform her instantly but they still should have made you rest in her quarters and fetched a doctor for you. ♡

♡ She is unable to take too much time off work for this because it's not a fatal illness but this does make her grow to resent Theanna even more. She wishes she could go claim her title as duke now and just give up all this nonsense instantly because what good is being the top night if she can not take a break to care for her darling even if her care would be no help. ♡

♡ She'll have to make the doctor take care of you while you're resting and then you are permanently banned from the training ground because you are too stupid to know when to rest. If you fight the doctor or refuse to take your medicine because it tastes so bad she will storm into her room and force you to take it. At night when she returns she gives your aching bones a little massage in order to speed up your recovery. ♡

♡ When you're recovered she still doesn't believe you, you're permanently required to refrain from training. She can't believe you pushed yourself so hard in order to become a knight, it doesn't matter if you got sick for a different reason and weren't actually pushing yourself, or that all the other nights already constantly push themselves, she doesn't care, you matter more than any of that and it's time you accept your role as her lady. If you miss the training grounds then you can visit but only as her future duchess. ♡

♡ Veronia is great at it. She already takes care of sick animals occasionally when she's bored and has nothing better to do. Taking care of a sick bear is way harder than taking care of a little human who can't really stop her. I mean she's a strong seven foot dragon woman so like what are you gonna do, especially when you're sick and weak, your punches feel like she just got poked. Aww isn't she so cruel for laughing at you, she'll make it up beloved. ♡

♡ When she comes back to the cave and finds you sick she's panicking because she thought you would be fine while she went out to get food, she didn't realize you had kicked the blanket off of yourself as soon as she left so you had gotten sick in that time from being exposed to the air. She'll wrap you like a burrito next time to make sure you can't kick it off. ♡

♡ She can't really afford to take a break from guarding the territory daily but she'll make her rounds very quick so she can return to you. Plus all her hunting is necessary but she'll get much better at hunting this week since now she has to find ways to speed the process up much more. She'll be by your side the rest of the time though. ♡

♡ She has to admit, she's kind of into this. Though she wouldn't say it out loud because she feels bad for thinking this, she finds this extremely appealing to her fucked up defenseless princess versus dragon roleplay. Even if you said you were okay with it, she would never act on that desire because your body badly needs to recover so sadly she will just be a good diligent mate and try not to think about how good you look right now as she massages your back trying to ease your ache. ♡

♡ Once you're better she is taking you with her when she secures the perimeter, she will put you in an adult sized bjorn if she has to. Though she will eventually give up on that idea when she realizes it might make you nauseous, still she will unfortunately have to make sure you are awake when she patrols because she can't let you kick the blankets off again. You'll be fed and bundled up, plus set up with maybe some books or an activity before she leaves from now on. ♡

[ideas-4-stories]

I am still thinking about the buggy Anastasia au (also, I am not much of a writer, if this falls into the style of dming or a gay fiction podcast, that’s what I got in me, and tonight I’m a lil stoney baloney, that’s what else I got in me, so this will be a wall of text) and like, I had the intention of Buggy being out because I like trans fem Buggy and also mostly because the drama of the hunt for Dark King Silvers Rayleigh and King of the Pirates Gol D Roger daughter. They know she’s probably dead but they can’t prove it and they can hold onto that hope.

Shanks threw himself into the hunts for Buggy and can’t bring himself to believe she’s gone, he’s still doing his drunk pirate thing but, he’d do anything to find her, his crew would follow him anywhere to find her.

And Blue, starts to remember, as she gets brought along by Mihawk and Crocodile. She sees Shanks, just barely, and it triggers the beginning of her memories coming back, and sailing has been instinctive, since Buggy forgot and Blue began, so she’s becoming more of an active participant in her own kidnapping by the day. She’s commandeered a jacket from Mihawk, not his style at all but he’s been holding onto it nonetheless (it’s Shanks’, he hasn’t shared how or why he’s got it, or that it’s Shanks’ beside a somewhat bewildered comment to Crocodile, who honestly does not want to know about Shanks and Mihawks break up and thus did not ask) but Blue wears it because it’s comfortable and the sea is cold at night and it feels safe (and smells familiar, she can’t place how but it smells like the wind and the sun and Benn’s tobacco smoke and that smells like freedom and home to her, even now)

And, Blue didn’t believe it, that she might be Buggy, Blue was no one but a carnie and scared and alone and Buggy seems loud and flashy, but at a certain point, when she’s remembered more than anyone told her (Roger taught her and Shanks shanties, he started with Binks sake and Blue, Blues just always known the words, but, she’s humming along one night and it occurs to her, her dad taught her that, she knows it like breathing, that he smiled and sang and her other dad chuckled at him and loved it. She smiled and Crocodile asked what had her so happy and she tells him, and it’s just one of the several occasions he and Mihawk and a late night Blue-less meeting about) and she runs into someone else who calls her Buggy, that it must be true, and she’s still scared of it, but she stops trying to run from it all, because running home is far less scary. (Maybe the gang do run into Garp, he’s big and scary and a marine but he’s got a heart, and Garp the Hero’s known her since she was up to his knees, Ray’s and Rogers’ half feral brat who’s shy and anxious and has always been too clever for everyone’s good and he should arrest her, she’s a young and powerful pirate who’s only going to get stronger, but she’s Buggy and he wants to see her get home. Maybe it’a Shirohige or one of his crew, and pirate rivalry be damned they’ve missed her too. They get like 100% confirmation Blue is Buggy though. They haven’t gotten it from Shanks because Mihawk doesn’t wanna talk to him. Shanks is chasing them.)

Imma be honest idek for the timeline, maybe when Buggy and Shanks are like 18-19? Main ships Rayleigh/Roger/Rouge, she’s here and she also wants Buggy back, she just hasn’t come up, also I kinda lost the plot of the crossguild aspect but like

Anastasia!Buggy AU isn't something I needed, along with some other AUs that people have. For the timeline maybe if Roger is still alive, Buggy got lost around sixteen because that's probably the age she was when Roger was murdered, that's also something if Roger is dead, that would be a time that she could go missing.

Anyway, I love this so much! To me, Shanks and Buggy siblings in a way, so Buggy commandeered a jacket from Mihawk which was Shanks to begin with, is quite funny how Blue feels like she's safe in it. Because it reminds her someone safe and stuff.

There are so many ideas that can happen with this AU, like new characters that Blue met that can join in the Cross Guild, and maybe her circus has all her crewmates. They are just now fully a performing circus crew, that ain't pirates... unless they sometimes play as pirates

If you do more of these, I love to hear them!!!

[random-chaos-and-stuff]

Silly Game Time: Have you ever seen or heard a ghost (or what some might've considered to be a ghost)? If so, when and where?

Ohohohohohohoh I’ve been looking for an excuse to share some of this shit.

Short answer, yes, a while ago, twice at my house, and once on an island.

long answer is under the cut because I’ve been looking for an excuse to ramble about this stuff and it got a bit out of hand, aka horrifically long. So just be warned I guess.

So for context my mom’s side of the family has a history of some mildly supernatural stuff happening, and being able to sense stuff and all that jazz. Not in like the Hollywood type of way, just occasional feelings of a presence, or seeing something weird out of the corner of their eye, or encountering something strange for a bit, stuff like that. Overall pretty mild. And lucky me, I got it too. Maybe not ghosts or demons in the traditional sense most of the time, but definitely something else on occasion. Most of them are harmless, or just curious, but some are more malicious and all of that stuff. You can usually tell the difference based off vibes. Now here’s the thing, if you can more easily sense them, they can more easily sense you, and tend to get curious and interact a bit more because of it. I’ve encountered a couple of weird situations, none of which I can logically explain away easily (maybe the last one was my brain playing tricks on me, but considering it was on an island where a murder occurred on the next island over and was known to have many ghosts on it and literal graves I don’t think so), and I’ll share the ones I can think of right now here.

So this first one I don’t actually remember, because I was a newborn at the time. But my mom has told me about it a bunch. She said that when I was a baby and had just been brought home, I’d sometimes start randomly crying in my room. Now all kids do this, but she said I sounded almost scared. I’d always stop a while later, and when they checked on me I was fine. But she said that she felt a weird presence in my room sometimes. Now one time my mom apparently was putting me down for a nap, and I was all fine and dandy, the room all warm, and I went to sleep, and she left. A minute later I started crying really badly, so she rushed in, and apparently caught a flicker of someone looking at me by my crib, and the room was no joke several degrees colder, like actually cold in there. She immediately grabbed me and left the room, before telling whatever it was to leave, because it was scaring me. Sure enough, after that it left, and didn’t come back. It had just been curious.

The next thing I remember encountering was when I was like 10 or 11, it’s hard to remember, and wasn’t really a ghost I don’t think, but it was definitely something else, and it was definitely not nice. It possessed a stuffed monkey toy, one that came with a car in the trunk for some reason, with that cartoony smile and black eyes. It was cute for a while, until one day, it just. Wasn’t. Its face didn’t change, but somehow it felt more malicious, and like there was something behind it that meant us harm. It was in my younger brother’s and I’s room (we shared the room at the time), and there were several occasions when it moved on its own. Every single night it moved a little closer to my brother’s bed, inching across the room every time, though neither of us had touched it out of fear. Finally one day it got too close, and I was scared enough to go throw it out in the kitchen trash (downstairs, and across the hall/house from the at the time family room, which is important later), thinking that it would be gone in the morning. But instead, that morning we found it on the desk in the family room, laying across one of his other toys, as if nothing had happened. (I later asked both my parents and neither one had removed or touched it.) So my brother and I were scared, and I went and put it laying down in the kitchen on the stove, which was completely empty by the way, and went to talk with my brother. When I went back in, it was sitting straight up, propped up against the cookbook on the stove, just… staring. That freaked me out really bad, so I did the only thing my kid brain could think of (based off the limited media I had consumed at that age and what I had) and did an exorcism of sorts. I figured that crosses repelled demons or whatever, right? So I grabbed some lavender cough rub (which ended up working really well), drew a cross on it, and pinned it in a bike helmet so it couldn’t move and hung it in the breezeway. Repeated the cross thing a few more times, until it no longer felt actively malicious, and threw that thing away. It never returned.

Another one was a more complicated one, but I remember it really well. I think it was when I was 12 or 13, again, hard to remember. It was on an island, which was known for among other things, apparently having MANY ghosts, for many reasons. But I was playing a game of manhunt (basically a game of hide and seek mixed with tag for those who don’t know) at night on the island with some other kids in the group I was in, and it was all dark. I had started to feel a bit nervous and also didn’t know how long the game would last, so I started heading back to the hotel area/lawn area with lights and people, the main meeting place where everyone generally is, and people went after getting caught or opting out of the game. I began walking down this path, and kept seeing little blobs of shadow moving out of the corner of my eye, so I kept going to get back to the hotel area, not running or trying to catch their attention (seriously if you don’t need to draw supernatural attention then you probably shouldn’t, it rarely ends well), until I stopped for a moment because I saw a HUGE blob of shadow leap over the path, behind a fence into a garden or something, and disappear. I began walking to a more defined path after that, and soon began walking along the gravel path. After maybe a minute or less of walking, I heard footsteps behind me on the gravel path (a very distinct sound) and soon picked them out from my own. After a minute I stopped and turned around to see who it was, but nobody was there. But I still heard the footsteps on the path, getting closer. That’s when I bolted and absolutely LEGGED it back to the lawn area, to the nearest largish group of people with lights, and sticking with them for a while, until some of my friends showed up, having been caught, and we sat on the hotel area steps for a while under the lights.

So yeah, I definitely have. That’s not all of them, but they are the most memorable ones

[captaincaptainfisher]

Hello! Welcome to the chapter of the growth records where I try very hard to write SOC as aro/ace without falling to the "he's a robot who doesn't understand normal biological stuff" trope. I pray I did ok (and please tell me if I didn't) (also sex mention ig)

Growth records, entry 15.

First, an update on the pups.

At a few cycles old, they have both opened their eyes and begun crawling around. They have made a few attempts to walk upright and even managed a few steps, but they're still rather unsteady on their feet. Their personalities have remained consistent. The blue one is loud and confident, exploring further into my structure and on occasion needing to be corralled back by Socks. The grey one is much calmer and quieter, sticking closer to his guardian and watching curiously when I work. I am still brainstorming names... I am determined to do better than Socks.

The pup grown from the white tuft remains in vitro. I can make out very little of its features from outside the machine looking in, but it seems to be a little smaller than the others were at birth. Its heartbeat is very weak, but slowly getting stronger... I believe it will survive to birth, but suspect some form of deformity or defect has occurred during development.

Socks has spent a significant amount of time by the machine lately, staring at the fetal pup. I hope, for his sake, that it makes it.

Now... onto some rather exciting recent events.

Socks has been exploring the structure with the pups, teaching them about life and the creatures there and *especially* about pole mimic plants. They've been learning rather quickly... just like he did.

At one point, he took them back through the portal. To see it? To learn? To meet their "source material"? I do not know. But...

Well, to add some context, he rushed into the portal after I made the discovery that the machine not only produced slugpups, but theoretically, could produce adults as well. Socks was halfway out the door already as I was wondering how this would work...

He returned several hours later with two identically grey pieces of fur, and as I attempted to put the machine to work, the reasoning for his haste became clear.

The machine did indeed do as I expected- sped past the fetal stage in a matter of minutes, zoomed through adolescence, and in a manner of hours, two adult female slugcats emerged from the machine.

Their bodies are mostly grey, with an identical purple stripe down their backs. Their fronts have a more interesting pattern that extends from their muzzles down to their bellies, with more stripes of the same colour on their arms and legs. One has these patterns in a light pink, the other yellow. They are very similar in body structure as well as in colour, both being a fair bit smaller than Socks (though he is rather larger than average, so I don't believe this is a trait of their sex) with short, round snouts and long, thick tails.

After a brief period of disorientation upon exiting the artificial wombs, they immediately began interacting with Socks with an air of familiarity and friendliness. They seemed to recognise each other, which has very interesting implications for the use of my machine.

Firstly, the way they act with Socks is enough to lead me to believe they have retained the memories from whoever the fur belonged to before Socks brought it to me. I'm going to have to carefully monitor the pups as they grow to see if they also remember anything of a previous life elsewhere. I'm also going to look over the blueprints of the machine again... There were several times during assembly when the reasons for doing things didn't make sense to me as I followed the instructions. Hidden in one of these confusing moments must be an answer to how an entire personhood can be transferred through only the DNA in a scrap of fur.

Secondly, the way they act with Socks is teaching me more about their species.... And perhaps what a neglectful caregiver I have been.

My only previous experience with romantic companionship was from observing the ancients and other iterators. I never saw much need for it. I had iterator friends, even an ancient or two I was close with, and their friendship was something that gave me the will and the way to keep going during some of my darkest moments. But I never had any desire to kiss them, or have them be one person more special to me than anybody else. Some other iterators built romantic relationships with each other, but as we're all stuck in our cans, it only seemed to make them more lonely missing each other.

In a similar vein of things, some iterators were created with the ability to copulate, and some were not. The ones that were had more frequent visits from the ancients, and I occasionally heard the ones that weren't wishing that they were. It always seemed odd and unnecessary to me. Like many, the Karma 2 mural was painted on my old structure, and I often instructed my overseers to avoid it so I would not have the strange visual.

I have mentioned before that I occasionally forgot that Socks required food when he was a pup, due to myself having no need for it.

In a similar way, due to my own complete disinterest, I never considered that he might desire a romantic or sexual partner. I thought of companionship, but assumed that I would be enough of a friend to him to cover that basis, though I never imagined we would form an actual bond.

But his excitement at finally having others close to his age to interact with... It tells me I might have been wrong.

He treats them both with similar levels of affection, and they have both quickly bonded with and assumed mutual care of the pups.

The one in pink seems very cheerful, and has been quite excited to explore my structure and play with both Socks and the pups. The one in yellow has been much more mellow (if you'll pardon the rhyme) and seems to get on well with the grey pup. She has been quietly observing me for some time... I have not yet given them the mark of communication, so I know she is not listening to me, but she seems to be doing her best.

I'm glad that Socks is not lonely anymore... Though I may have to make some accommodations to my structure for the increasing slugcat population.

And get better at thinking of names.

Recording ends.

[grislyintentions]

|| HSR Theory- Former High Elder (Dan Feng)'s Crimes ||

TLDR: Reviving the dead at a great cost to the populace and single-handedly damaging the 'rehatching' cycle) Content warning: Discussions of religious aspects (Buddhism)

In chinese mythology, dragons are believed to be among one of the first mythical creatures to ever come into existence. They are believed to be capable of a great many things, including the ability to affect weather, removing or causing plagues as well as calamities. I have previously touched on this on different occasions by giving the example of how they were said to have repaired the 'hole' in the sky together with the Goddess Nuwa.

A lot of chinese mythological content (Nezha, Journey to the West etc) produced also reference how dragon palaces are under various different seas, which we can also see in HSR. Dragons are depicted to all possess a core (heart) that stores the remnants of their spiritual power. Should it be damaged, stolen or destroyed, the dragons will either perish permanently or be significantly weakened/die depending on how one chooses to portray it.

The concept of purity is tied very much to water in chinese culture, where one cleanses off any traces of unhealthy spiritual energy. We also see a LOT of lotus motifs all over the area, which are also used as symbols denoting purity, for they often times rise from mud without any staining on them.

With all these factors in mind, allow me to also reference elements of Buddhism that I believe can be found within 1.2:

According to the religious belief, when people die, they undergo what is referred to as the "Samsara" cycle. Where they are thereby reincarnated, sometimes in a different form to live out another life and thereby gain wisdom through constant different experiences until their soul is ready to enter into nirvana.

Depending on the branch of buddhism and other religions that people fall under, some believe that before entering into the reincarnation cycle, the individual must first be removed from their former identity (so only their soul remembers the experiences of their former life).

Some believe in the legend of Meng Po (Lady Meng), who offers you a broth of oblivion made from herbs and pond water. Upon drinking it, the soul of the dead will lose memories of their previous life and be reborn as a 'blank slate'. Others believe the souls of the dead wade into the river where the waters will then cleanse them of the detritus of their former life.

Doesn't this remind you of the 'hatching rebirth' that the vidyadhara go through every few cycles? Doesn't this remind you of how Bailu heals others essentially with 'herbal water'? And how Dan Heng seems to have inherited memories of Dan Feng, whilst Bailu seems to recall none of her memories but also seem mostly stuck in the form of a child? Doesn't this also remind you of how followers of the Hunt seem to think immortality is a curse and how Yaoshi's followers have created abominable acts?

In chinese mythology, one is taught about the cycle of birth and death. Often times, there is a belief that interrupting that and trying to resurrect the dead is an act of unholy treason, a defilement of nature that often comes at a great cost.

Given all the aforementioned themes, I theorise that Dan Feng has likely brought someone back from the dead. However, something went horrendously wrong in the process, resulting in the damaging of the rehatch/rebirth cycle where one is likely supposed to retain their appearance and powers but not former memories of their life.

Given Bailu's form, I theorise that her former incarnation was involved in the process of trying to stop whatever calamity occurred and got severely wounded. Thus she is 'incomplete' due to the rebirth cycle being damaged.

[james5-doe]

The Netherworld Saga

I'm collecting the entire five-part Netherworld saga here, in anticipation of some possible artwork. I've added Dale's correct hair color. This is a peek at what could be Jedda and Rick's future on Earth N, a continuity created by @amanda-multifandom.

------

Chapter 1

Jedda knelt with Rick at Hadea's throne, waiting for an answer to why they'd been called. Rick's eyes were fastened on the queen's bare feet, which was the proper way to show respect. Jedda got to look at her mother's face.

Hadea was clearly in serious mode — even more serious than usual. She rested her arms along those of her chair. "Duncan MacLeod...has certain opponents. Many will rise in the days to come."

Jedda's brow twitched. She was surprised. "How did you even know of Duncan MacLeod?" And why did Hadea care about the guy? His struggles were occurring on the surface world.

"His clan and mine have history. A vow was made very long ago. There is a debt to be settled now." She paused a few seconds. "In order to assist him as best I can, I have to ascend to the rank of Empress. The title of Queen...shall go to another."

Jedda froze stiff, staring at her. This simply couldn't mean what she thought it did.

Rick began glancing between them both.

"I know that you desire to bond with...Jade..." Hadea said the name rather quietly. "But I may need your assistance soon."

Jedda had to pause to take all of it in. A part of her was utterly stunned by this. Another part of her wasn't smitten at all. She'd sensed she was going to live here someday. She was the Princess of the Netherworld, a title she'd been given when she'd met Hadea, when she was adopted informally.

But ruling here? Reigning as queen? She wasn't so sure she was ready for that — even if Hadea could help her prepare. "Mother..." she murmured. "Do you mean me?"

"It is the safest course of action now," Hadea affirmed. "Once MacLeod's opponents know who you are, once they have learned of the bond we share, they will endeavor to hunt you down. When the time arrives for you to join this fight, you will have better resources here. You shall be able to defend yourself — and to assist any others in need."

Jedda knew Hadea had a valid point, but she wasn't sure about this just yet. She and Rick had made certain plans above. They weren't quite ready to abandon those.

Where, exactly, would their future be?

----

Chapter 2

Rick felt tense — which wasn't bad. There was a good reason for that now. He held her hands, stroking them. "The first time I ever laid eyes on you — your little bare feet and your jungle skirt, messy hair spread above the leafy bra... Well, I reached a rather silly conclusion. I let my prejudice get the better of me." He took a slow breath. "But everything changed in the next few days. I saw you were smart, I saw you were skilled, and most of all, you were sensitive too." His eyes welled up. "And once I realized what was happening...I tried to deny it. I tried to ignore it. But that was a battle I was doomed to lose. I couldn't reject what I felt within."

He noticed her blushing as the words sank in.

"Jedda Walker..." He lowered himself. "There's nothing that I want more on Earth right now, than to have the honor of marrying you."

----

Chapter 3

Several Years Later

Netherworld Throne — 3:50 pm

Rick watched his daughter as she played on the floor, moving her dolls on a burgundy rug. Something was unusual about the scene: Dale wasn't adding dialogue today. On most occasions, to Rick's delight, Dale had the dollies talking to one another, demonstrating some of the things she'd learned — eloquent speech, personal manners, and even some basics of politics.

She had been quiet for the past few days. Rick hadn't figured out why that was. It always disturbed him when the kids were upset. Not when they were pouting, but truly upset. He had an obligation to shield them from pain.

He studied her lengthy, gold-colored locks, pulled right back in a cute half-up. He'd never seen a female as precious as her — except, of course, for her beautiful mom.

Leaning toward his wife, he lowered his voice. "So why is she being so quiet of late?"

Jedda adjusted her sparkling crown, curling her toes as she frowned a bit. She obviously had something painful to share. "She misses you, hon," she said in a whisper.

Rick felt a jolt. "What do you mean?"

He already knew. Over the last couple years or so, he'd done the very thing that he'd sworn to avoid. He'd made a child wonder why he worked so much.

Jedda smiled a tad — and only a tad. "She's not an infant, Rick. She's five years old. She wants to know a little more about her dad."

He stared at Dale, twitching a bit.

When he'd agreed to lead the Netherworld knights, he'd vowed to stay devoted to his kids and their mom.

But certainly enough, in Gordon tradition, he had let his duties take priority.

Things had been different for his father and mother. They weren't just spouses. They were a team. That had made it easier for them to commit — or less difficult than it might have been.

But Jedda was a queen. Rick was a knight. People like him had to be on the road. If he started living out there too long, he would be neglecting what mattered most.

Was it only Dale whom he'd come to upset? Were Chris and his wife feeling shunned as well? "Jedda," he said, holding her hand. "I promised that I'd be here for all of you..."

She smiled at him. A full smile now.

"And that's exactly what I'm going to do." He gave her a kiss. She kissed him back. Then he left the throne and eased down on the floor. "Hey, kiddo."

Dale grinned. She looked a bit cautious — as though she thought she had to protect her heart.

Rick eyed the floor. That definitely hurt.

Then he looked up, beaming at her. "Let's go out and play."

----

Chapter 4

Several Years Later

"What's wrong?" Dale asked, approaching the throne.

Her mother looked tense as she turned to her.

People liked to shower Dale with compliments. They called her astute for a nine-year-old — claimed she had the makings of a prodigy. Dale knew it wasn't really like that, though. She was no genius. She never would be. But she could read her mother pretty well by now. She always sensed when something was bothering her.

Her mom touched her brow. "A queen in the east — a foe of MacLeod's — claims she helped the Netherworld years ago. The time has arrived for us to pay our debt."

Dale scowled a bit. That didn't sound good. "What does she want?"

"Your brother's hand. She wants Christopher to move into her home, then marry her daughter when they come of age." Her mother grew quiet, eyeing the wall. She seemed to be in deep contemplation now.

What in the world was there to think about, though? Her brother simply wasn't a bargaining chip.

"Mom..." Dale felt a shiver within. "You can't be planning to agree to that."

"What? No..." her mother declared. "We told the queen to offer us proof of the debt. But even if she does, she can't have Chris. We'll simply find another way to pay her off." She stroked her chin. "There's something that's beginning to trouble me. The woman's been nothing but quiet since..."

Dale grew stiff. She eyed the door. "Speaking of Chris...where is he now?"

----

Chapter 5

There!" Dale yelled, spotting her brother.

Chris was on his knees in the green courtyard. A dark-garbed man was laying at his side.

A little dagger glistened in the fluttering grass. Splotches of blood were sprinkled everywhere — along the dirt, along the man, and most notably, on Chris's chest.

Dale froze a second, twitching in place. Someone had come to abduct the prince. This had resulted in a gory scene.

"No... No!" her mother called out, losing her crown as she rushed to Chris.

Her dad ran too, red in the face. He wore a look of horror that was foreign to her.

Dale hurried forth. She couldn't keep up.

"Chris!" her mother called out as she knelt.

Several guards were rushing to the courtyard now. Where had they been a few seconds ago?

"I'm all right, Mother," Christopher said, holding his eyes on the fallen man. Blood was splattered along his shirt. Sprinkles were mixed in his raven hair. "I grabbed his dagger as he picked me up."

The man had a gash right across his chest.

Her mother looked awed. Her dad did too. Both of them were too stunned to speak right now.

Her brother still appeared rather shaken as well. Only Dale was locked in reality.

"Chris," she said, touching his arms, "were there any others?"

"The other one ran."

Dale spun around. "Soldier!" she called.

A guard came and knelt.

"See that the outside walls are secured. We have to ensure that the partner is caught."

"Right away, highness," he said before moving.

Her mother looked proud as she turned to Dale, then she leaned down and hugged Chris at her side.

------

Rick took a seat on the side of the bed, claiming the spot right beside his wife.

Jedda rubbed the muscles near the sides of his neck, soothing his skin as she often did.

He let his stare linger on the carpeted floor. "He's nine years old, and there's blood on his hands." He'd never, ever, wanted that for his son. The people behind the abduction would pay. Both of the intruders gave their bosses up.

Jedda took a breath. "I had a bit of blood on my hands then too — back when I was Christopher's age, I mean."

Rick was confused. She'd never shared this.

"I had to strike an animal down in defense," Jedda revealed. "It left me upset...but it wasn't the same. It wasn't comparable to what Chris went through."

Rick looked away. "He's gotten so quiet."

"It's all sinking in. That's the way it was after my first time." She paused a moment. "I had just turned fifteen back then."

"I thought you killed the animal when you were nine."

Jedda hesitated. "I wasn't referring to the animal."

He eyed her again, deeply surprised. He loved this woman, and she loved him. They'd opened their hearts on so many occasions — but there were still things he didn't know about her.

He kissed her head. She stroked his cheek.

Then she stood. "I'm going to go check up on Chris again."

Rick remained quiet as he watched her leave.