#so they allow themselves happiness when it comes to them and thats what im doing

[benadril]

I can like feel myself getting better ever so slowly

[bibleofficial]

lol uni accom sent an email saying that theyve ‘received many complaints from staff students & guests’ & it just makes me laugh but they DID include a place accommodating me feeding them at the end of the car park which is fine bc that is all i wanted to be fair. this was ALWAYS ABOUT POWER like 😭😭 it’s deadass so miserable living here we are all postgrad students so 22+ but we literally have room inspections 2x a semester like we’re fucking 12 to make sure things are ‘clean’ as if the building isn’t as old as our parents & literally falling apart. they restrict u so much like u can’t have a kettle in ur room …. but those guests can ??? ur putting a like 3 inch suicide bar on my window ? that i PAY FOR ???? girl … ‘it gives ppl anxiety & diseases …” & ???? having no fucking security here gives ME anxiety & these mfs are givin ME diseases shut the fuck up !!! THE ASBESTOS IN THE WALLS CAN HEAR U & IT’S LAUGHING

[strangersynth]

bc you have things to say doesn't always mean you needa say them let alone it also doesn't always mean it's your place to say them kwim

[bcolfanfic]

need more about the bucks' baby micah, headcanons or blurb i want more!!! (please, and when you have time ofc)

for ref

doing this in headcan0ns list form bc im tired from the time zone switch back to the states

the bucks do, as reffed in that blurb, turn the car around from going to wisconisn to go back to wyoming. end up having to get a hotel somewhere for the night so they don't drive more or less 20 hours roundtrip themselves into an early grave. but yeah.

swing josie by gale's sister’s house on the way back to sheridan. don't explain all the details but have to give her *some* explanation when they go from headed them to wisconsin to now suddenly back in wyoming.

maybe don't explain that this baby is her biological sibling right away but just. say that someone they know needs help with their baby, and that they gotta go back because they don't want him to be in the hospital by himself. pretty word salady but they're exhausted and she's five so. it is what is for the time being.

get to the hospital and get scrubbed in to down to the nicu with natalie to go see him. john's head still feels like his head is still in in spin-mode to the extent that he's not really processing everything fully.

but gale sees that itty bitty baby in his little nicu incubator with a little tube in his nose and is just. distraught.

has to sit down after a minute because its making his chest hurt. he just can't fathom how little he is and how he's in *danger* and how connected he already feels to him.

he gets reallll "woowoo" about the fact that he finally brought up wanting another kid to john all of 20 minutes before they got the call about him. feels like he somehow already intrinsically knew about him before he actually knew.

so kinda the reverse of how it was with josie- gale instantly feels bonded to him and john has a little bit of a harder time.

loves him so much already, is worried sick with all the preemie health stuff he's got going on. its just hard to process how fast everything is happening. if him and gale had sat down and decided to go the infant adoption route that'd be one thing.

in that case he'd have a lot more time to work through his hurdles re: being scared of having a baby, of being responsible for someone's life from scratch etc etc. but here he only had the drive back from wisconsin.

calls his mom a lot. calls curt a lot. that helps.

lil guy doesn't have a name for the first week of his life lmao. they just call him buddy and baby boy and then john is sitting up w/ gale one night and asks if he's given any thought to his name.

they land on micah curtis. micah as a riff off of michael the archangel, and curtis after their best friend (:

curt cries when he finds out. sweet man.

john's mom comes out from wisconsin and when she's there at the hospital that's when both the bucks go to gale's sister's house and have to explain to josie- the best they can- the full details.

poor peanut is so conflicted about Everything. has been confused about not seeing either of her dads in the same room for almost two weeks. is excited about having a baby sibling- but confused about why if he's /her/ sibling from her mom why she can't see her mom.

just a lot of Big Feelings, which gale and john handle the best that they can. good dads <3

i think it finally really Clicks for john when micah is doing okay enough that theyre allowed to hold him. looks at that lil guy in his lil nicu baby beanie sleeping on his chest and just. yeah. big thats my son, i would do anything for you feelings.

john gets really into sitting by his lil incubator and reading to him. nice way to bond that isn't super overwhelming. makes gale heart happy to watch. his boyssss.

this is getting super long lmao so ill cut if off here. but i wove micah- and rachel and i have developed a looottt of lore about him as a teenager/young adult (specifically re: him and wyatt- helen's baby with nash/ev's step son). so feel free to come prompt me to yap more!

[howlsofbloodhounds]

Delta anon here again and I am loving these most recent posts. I have many ideas now.

For one, if Color was distressed enough about not knowing how Killer is doing, I feel like Delta and Epic would let him call - under the exception that they are allowed to listen in. Color obviously protests this, but they refuse to budge. Because although they do want Color to recover from the abuse and manipulation he's going through with Killer, they also know how bad his panic attacks get when he thinks a loved one is dead. But the immediate minute Killer starts guilt tripping, one single word about it, one of them physically takes the phone away and hangs up while the other restrains Color from stopping him. No hesitation.

And if he sneaks out? Oh, buddy. You have an engineer for a friend. You bet your ASS that Delta somehow managed to put a location chip on him somehow - phone, hoodie, pocket, you name it. He managed to put it in - and incredibly well hidden. So if Color sneaks out? Once they wake up and realize he's gone, they follow Delta's tracker straight to him.

Obviously once they get Color back (and once Delta and Beta are allowed their time of beating the shit out of Killer and probably psychologically fucking him over a bit, too), they first check to make sure he's ok. Then they launch straight into scolding him for it. Because really, what the fuck? We understand that you're worried for him and that you miss him, but that wasn't ok. You need to be ok with not being able to peek over Killer's shoulder (hypervigilance) 24/7 to make sure he isn't doing anything wrong. You can live without him and he can live without you.

Now this is probably about when Color starts trying to defend Killer, or get out of it somehow. They shut that bullshit down instantly.

Delta calls it as it is. It's abusive, toxic and manipulative. And although Color hates it - deep down, he knows they're right. He won't ever admit it to himself, but he knows that if Delta or Epic were somehow in this situation, he would call it what it is, too.

Epic takes a gentler approach, knowing Delta can definitely speak for the both of them, so he focuses more on making sure Color is ok at the moment and isn't getting too upset. He steps in when needed, but let's Delta do the most of the talking. Because Beta is telling him exactly what to say and how it's abusive. Because unfortunately, poor Beta knows what an abusive relationship is like.

Color, of course, would probably try to flip it - he'd try to play therapist again, asking how Delta/Beta knew about abuse, why did they? Yeah, that wouldn't fly either. That also gets shut down very quickly.

The road trip would last a very long time. The bigger a fight Color puts up, the longer it lasts. And then some on the way back. Because like hell are they gonna be letting Killer near right now. They love Color way too much to just sit on the sidelines and watch him be abused and manipulated by a mass murderer.

Oh hello again delta anon so happy to see you!! /gen

Also may i propose some bits of Ekko vs Jinx for either Cross vs Killer or Delta vs Killer.

cuz like. the exhausted walk, the death glare and sneer, the unhinged giggle, and “ooohhh..look who it is! the boy SAVIOR!” either that or ekko can be murder/dust protecting color & delta all the possibilities. or just good old delta protecting color & epic.

(But for my own sanity im gonna say it doesnt manage to ever come to this type of confrontation. please i cant take it i need them to go back to being themselves!! 😭) (thats a lie i love the drama of it all lmao)

and of course delta put a tracker on color lmao. get chipped idiot.

and like..imagine that color has a hard time putting seeing himself as completely blameless simply because killer made him into a forced perpetrator. and hes like i said that or i did that and i hurt him and delta & beta have to remind him of not only the context surrounding all of it—how killer pushed and pushed and manipulated—but also point out that killer and chara and nightmare had this exact same shit going on.

if color can claim killer wasnt to blame for what chara and nightmare made him do, then how can he be to blame for what killer made him do. breaking that cycle baby hell yeah.

oh i wonder how itll all end. Will it keep escalating, will it just be a period of enforced no contact between color and killer until killers able to get it together. or will color and killer run off eventually.

aw god imagine colors interactions with stage 1. id imagine he didnt have a clue what’s going on really—what would he ever think this was okay? where did the logic come from?—and also id imagine hed have missing gaps between the memories of color comforting him and the memories of color punishing him—why? what happened? whywhy? this cant be real what did he do?

because through it all stage 1 would immediately jump to the conclusion that he did something. he cant say why—he doesnt understand, what was he thinking? he cant connect with his other stage’s logic—and yet theres also this sense of..fear. around color.

which is thinks is fucking stupid hes the reason it even happened at all. and the whole thing sets stage 1 back entire leaps and bounds in his process and he keeps his mouth fucking shut and tries force himself to deal with the guilt and shame and misguided fear and ooh all the drama.

hmm does anyone have any ideas for what happens with stage 1 or what just happens next 🤔

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

I have to ask where to fefeta and Erisol fit into your theories. Obviously fefeta exploding due to to two different people trying to apologize to her then arguing caused her to explode, and probably hint that the two halves are pitch for each other. But what about Erisol, why out of all alpha sprites, he is the most stable? What does it say about Eridan and Sollux? And a possible relationship of theirs or lack of one

Is Erisol the troll-sprite embodiement of Terezi’s and Gamzee’s shitty relationship. Absolute fucking disgusting codependence that allows them to wallow in their self pity. If that’s the case Eridan would be like a comfortable blanket for sollux, but not a good relationship

Why did Skaia give Eridan a quest that is knew Eridan would royally fuck up due to being raised as the next orphaner and thus have a trigger finger on anything big and white. Is Skaia stupid? Could Eridan come back to it at a later date and find that his quest is now to help the angels rebuild? Is it because Skaia accidentally made Satan and tried to set its most powerful aspect to beat it, overriding character development for hope players?

Answering these one by one:

For my thoughts on Erisol and Fefeta, see this essay and this essay.

It's hard to say why Gamzee brought the trolls back; I have an ask in my inbox positing that he's trying to set up pitch relationships (which I like the thought of) - I'm still rereading this part of the comic, so it's not super clear to me, either. I don't want to speculate when I can't be sure of my opinion.

Lastly, we don't actually know what quest Skaia gave to Eridan. We know that Eridan received prophesies from the angels of their lord, whom he believes he was meant to defeat, but it's unclear if this was his planetary quest, or some side thing he had to deal with, similar to how Feferi has an overhanging prophecy to "unite the two races" and Karkat has his to "bring equality and forgiveness between all bloodlines."

However, what we do know is that free will > predestination within this setting (predestination only exists insofar as characters paint themselves into corners with their own choices, but it was still their CHOICES that created those corners, and not the machinations of fate and destiny), and Eridan is the one who chose to give up his destiny of defeating LE:

GG: im pretty sure hes from the future! CA: wwhy GG: because he said hes my grandson … CA: that gun i just gavve you is somethin of a hatchright to the kid CA: happy i could play a role in your dirty stinkin lineage GG: like an heirloom? i guess it could be … CA: i kinda think thats wwhy i found the gun in the first place CA: but noww im forsakin it because fuck i just found a better destiny than my old crappy one wwhich i nevver got any appreciation for anywway

It wasn't an insurmountable challenge for him and his team, it was just one that they failed because they couldn't/wouldn't address their personal problems in time, and that he voluntarily abandoned. Moreover, if we assume that, indeed, Eridan's classpect quest WAS to defeat LE, then we can still see a fairly clear character arc set out for him: Eridan's main emotional conflict stems from his inner hope being in anguished conflict with the despair and anxiety he feels toward the future that Alternia laid out for him - orphaner, empress's sea dweller, nobility. As a hope player, his struggle lies in believing in things. It's encapsulated in the way he decries magic as stupid and fake and dumb and bullshit, but he FUCKING LOVES MAGIC, since he collects shitty wands and has no less than 6 wizard statues in his respiteblock.

That anxiety and despair won in the comic, and he went on a killing spree because he felt he had nothing left to live for; in a hypothetical scenario where he DOES manage to grasp his powers and destroy WITH Hope rather than destroying Hope itself, then the opposite would be true: he defeats his anxiety and despair, asserting a new belief for a better and brighter future, shooting a beam of "make impossible things possible" through LE's otherwise unconditionally immortal heart.

[karin-miyoshi]

Do you think yuyuyu is ableist?

sheesh, talk about a loaded question

definitely opens up a lot of rabbit holes. ill give my opinion, but note im not the most educated on the subject itself so giving a definite answer is outside my scope.

ill put a read below, but for me, i personally think it isnt, but can be easily misinterpreted as is on a surface level.

tldr, ableism is discrimination towards those with disabilities.

the character in question most of the time when it comes to these topics is tougou, who uses a wheelchair in season 1 due to losing function in her legs. there are never any distasteful jokes made about this, and the show constantly shows various handicap friendly services throughout the show. something even more surprising is that these are never the core focus of the scene or pointed out, its always well integrated into the world as if it were normal (important).

just skimming through s1, we have:

wheelchair assistance integration for both cars and stairs

special swim courses for the disabled, not separated from the rest of the class

beach wheelchairs and separate assistants

now while we can assume a lot of these were due to her previous service as washio sumi, i dont think that would really be fair to the production team putting these in, and it really feels like theres a lot more heart than "yeah we put these for the big shock value realization later on". even after regaining function in her legs near the end of the season, tougou's priority was always towards yuuna and her recovery.

onto the next topic, which is the show taking away and then returning these characters functions throughout. whats important to consider here is what is considered tragic, is it the characters living without these certain functions, or is it the act of losing these functions themselves?

"It'll definitely improve. I mean, we haven't done anything wrong." (Fuu, s1ep9) again, no distasteful jokes made about their disabilities, and fuu even plays it off with her sick eyepatch. her worries instead stem from the loss of itsuki's dream, in the form of her no longer being able to sing. thats the key factor here, being punished for doing what is right, losing the ability to do what you could do before, losing the memories of the time you spent with your friends. (thats another thing i see with a lot of these arguments, they always bring up physical disabilities, but ive never seen one actually talk about ones regarding memory, arguably the most precious thing to them). tougou flat out doesnt remember sonoko at all despite being comrades in arms before, and understandably freaks out that the same might happen with her and yuuna.

now, understandably, the ending to s1 seemed super rushed, and them getting their bodily functions back seemed rather sudden. this put a lot of people off, and was really only explained in s2, which many didnt watch.

people should be allowed to grieve if they lose something important to them, and should be allowed to be happy if they get it back. personally, i dont think people realize the weight of their words when they say, "oh i wish karin wouldve stayed deaf, itd be really cool to see the club members learning sign language for it" or "yuuna in a wheelchair was really cute, i wish we saw more of it." yeah its a cool idea i guess, maybe something to see while theyre stil recovering, but forever? in a chase to see more representation, i hope they realize what they are wishing onto others eventually (even if fictional). while many with disabilities are satisfied with their life, they should be able to wish for better if they wanted to, its not like theyd wish their circumstances on anyone else, right? shouldnt the same apply here, to the girls who've actually lived both with and without disabilities?

just my two cents, hope this wasnt too hard to read! theres a lot more i could write up, especially regarding sonoko, but thats a whole other discussion i should probably save for another time

[anonymocha]

Medbleu headcanon medbleu because you made me like this one more (Ex Balloon Party Baby Blue believer)

Baby Blue is KLS representation (I think) how cool. It's a very rare condition where people get so tired all of the time and will be asleep from weeks to months basically. Her way with living and coping with her illness has made Medicine Pocket a lot less morbid about their own condition and enjoy life more.

Baby Blue is more calm while Medicine Pocket is more limbic. Even though Baby Blue struggles between reality and her unending dreams, she has sleep-talked Medicine Pocket out of doing all kinds of awful things to themselves by slowly repeating back their answer to 'what are you doing'. Medicine Pocket wants to be someone she can depend on; they are more careful and steady when thinking of Baby Blue

Medicine Pocket, in turn, keeps Baby Blue safe when she is unaware of her surroundings. It was really crude at first but after they figured out it was impossible to change her condition they became more protective rather than bothered by the constant dreaming.

Baby Blue has a hundred nicknames/petnames for them. Medicine Pocket isn't confident with coming up with these names but she gets so happy whenever they come up with a new one. Blue's favorite name for them is 'Puppy'.

very wholesome..... Baby Blue requires Medicine Pocket to sleep with her for at least 6 hours a day. She can be little a clingy when Medicine Pocket comes home.

also also Blue mistook Medicine Pocket for a wonderlandshark at first and after she presumed them as such they had to step out of the room to try not to cry and explode thats True love .

📣Good Night USA

This is so important to me you have no idea ooouuuhhh 😭😭😭😭😭 I never thought of a proper proper wholesome dynamic between them to this extent and now I am enlightened…

This is a LONG post you have been warned. The MedBlue brainrot is SUPER REAL.

OK I CAN IMAGINE BABY BLUE CALLING THEM PUPPY IN THE SWEETEST SOFTEST SLEEPY VOICE EVER FULL OF GENTLE LOVE AND ADORATION… IM GONNA CRYYYYY AND MELT AND EXPLODE… Mental support Baby Blue is real (both in a meta and metaphorical sense).

I also like how she’s, in her own way, helping to keep the researcher in check. Someone has to keep her safe, therefore they also should keep themself safe so that they can be there for her. Yes, they love their job and the delightful dangers it brings with it. But they also have a person dear to them waiting for them. Also, in my headcanon, Medicine Pocket shelters a lot of supposed-to-be-experiment dogs at Laplace so they got to get it together for their pups, too (I imagine Baby Blue napping together with their puppies at the Laplace fields occasionally… Puppy tea party… Somft…). They want to take care of her and their pups, be dependable, and protect them. They used to think that this protection comes at the cost of their own wellbeing but NUH UH. Baby Blue's presence and words remind them that there are dangerous thresholds that they don't need to cross, no matter how 'logical' it seems.

She wants them to sleep with her an adequate amount of hours, therefore they cannot fuck up their sleep schedule by pulling impulsive all-nighters (I’m guilty of this too whoops). These two would get! Cozy! And Baby Blue would softly sleeptalk nonsensical but calming tales from her wonderland to help them sleep. I assume bedtime stories aren’t a very common thing in their childhood, especially when they got taken away with the beagles. So Baby Blue's whimsical, imaginative antics would be like taking back tiny but meaningful pieces of their lost childhood, stolen by a life of cold, clinical, and dangerous research. After they started sleeping with Baby Blue, her warmth and comforting stories allowed the researcher to get not only much-needed sleep, but also sating a yearning. A yearning for coziness and unconditional peace they likely brushed aside for a long, long time through the span of their childhood to teenhood.

On Baby Blue, a lot of people likely gave up on her. Doctor after doctor after doctor shook their heads and raised their hands after examining her condition. Teachers, friends, and even strangers are bewildered by her, calling her crazy, and treating her as more of a 'case study' or 'phenomenon' than an actual person. Those who did stick around her for a while couldn't stand her constant dreamings and tendencies to isolate, they either took it to heart or found themselves drifting away from her. It took her a while but she convinced herself that she was used to it, wonderland and its dwellers were her true friends after all. But at the same time, I feel like she would still realize that she's living in two worlds, and recognizes her loneliness in one of them. She tried to not think about it for a while but it likely bit at her some nights. Medicine Pocket may be the only doctor insistent enough to stick with her for longer than many others before them thanks to their stubbornness and curiosity. That's enough to get her attached to them, to say the least.

I WOULD LOVE TO SAY MORE THINGS ABOUT THESE TWO (such as her wonderland and their research on it, Baby Blue getting curious on Medpoc's research which led to them infodumping, more Baby Blue interactions with Medpoc's pups, Medpoc protecting Baby Blue from weirdo doctors at Laplace, etc etc) BUT I MAY NEED TO SLEEP GOODNIGHT INDONESIA 🔊THANK YOU ANON FOR THE ASK FEEL FREE TO SEND ME MORE OMG THE MEDBLUE BRAINROT IS REAL!!! I want to write a fic abt these two SO BAD. I want them to BE HAPPY!!!

[soulofamy]

i would honestly go as far as to say that project soul would be missing a really good opportunity by NOT pairing maxi and setsuka up tbh. yes i know that they have never met before but hear me out

first and foremost, both of them had their families taken from them and are now on revenge quests. both travel solitarily in order to accomplish those quests. and then if you want to bring the old timeline into it, both of them actually accomplished their quests and then realize just how unfulfilled and lost they feel now that they dont have revenge driving them. they both decide to create drastically different lifestyles for themselves in order to find new purpose, with maxi becoming a hermit in the mountains with edge master in order to reign in the evil inside him and setsuka moving all the way to turkey, changing her name, and adopting any orphan she can find

in the old timeline though, i think that they both suffer from a storytelling perspective because yes they have interesting story going on but project soul really has no way to tell us about it because they are both traveling by themselves. whenever we see maxi its always with kilik and xianghua, which canonically makes no sense because he was separated from them for so long and didnt remember them anyway.

i think it would actually make so much sense and be to the benefit of both characters to have them meet, travel together, and then eventually form attachments to each other. i think on the surface they would work well together because maxi would find setsukas origin to be so fascinating. maxis whole entire thing before his family died was adventure and becoming worldly and well traveled. setsuka quite literally embodies all of that in the circumstances of her birth. and then setsuka can take comfort in maxi because maxi, unlike everyone else, would not regard her as a freak. she might actually be able to take comfort in the fact that he admires her for what makes her unique

then when we go deeper into what would make them work so well, i just imagine that they would be able to sympathize with each others motivation so well. they would validate each others desire for vengence and probably even help each other out. maybe if theyre in town and maxi hears whispers of mitsurugis whereabouts he could tell setsuka about it as a plan for where they travel to next. maybe they train together to keep their fighting skills sharp.

but i also dont think that a pairing between them would be complete sunshine and rainbows either. if they go down the path of maxi spiraling because of the soul edge shard inside of him again like they did in the last timeline, i imagine that it becomes a bit volatile as time goes on. maxi just kinda becomes aggressive without meaning to be or is so bent on his own revenge quest that he neglects her. ultimately i do think that they would separate because of it, which would still allow them to each go on their own paths (maxi being a hermit, setsuka moving to turkey). but then when all the dust has settled and maxi and setsuka could both be a healthier place where revenge is no longer their motivator and instead, training and guiding the next generation is, i think that they could eventually come back together and be happy

anyway thats just how i would personally do it, im curious to hear what other people think

[evertidings]

big brained anon here from a's most recent analysis. i have smth for rylan. rem when i said 'comfortable sharing trauma in jokes rather than in serious situations because they dont wan to face those feelings for a second time', well based on Rylan's lines on the game "if i told you all of my secrets, I wouldnt have any part of me left." my girl/boy/person has trust issues 100%. they think that if they smile, and are able to make jokes about certain situations that make them uncomfortable, they can grow comfortable with the situations, meaning that they can hide who they are from the public, after all "give them enough to form a relationship with you, but never enough to hurt you". They're exhausted by their own game that they're the only ones hurting themselves (self sabotage) at this point, but they're either not self aware enough to acknowledge that or bury their feelings so far down that they dont have to acknowledge being self aware enough. that's why they play the game they do, how far they can flirt with someone or make someone hate them before they pull away, as stated in the book. it's because they dont know how to be in tune with their own emotions, that playing this game with other people's emotions is the only way they can indirectly handle their own. playing this game with emotions is the only way they allow themselves to feel, but it ends in more self sabotage because they bury it again. also, you mentioned they havent let themselves cry in a while. probably because letting themsleves cry means they have to let out all the emotions they've been hiding over the years, but thats so scary for them, why should we confront something when we've been avoiding it for so long? this is so long, and i was gonna try to write more, but idk maybe not. hope im somewhere on the right path lmao

okay this one’s so interesting to me because like, it’s half right and half wrong. and maybe i’m gaslighting myself but i’m kinda happy you didn’t guess it all because it means Rylan’s still kinda a mystery, which, is what i want them to stay as. at least for now.

i’ll say that it’s the ‘playing with emotions’ bit is what’s wrong here. i’m sure it wasn’t your intention but it kinda makes Rylan seem like sadistic haha which, they’re not. they don’t enjoy hurting other people. if anything, they almost take pleasure in hurting themself? or, how do i explain this. you could almost say it’s their version of a test. they like seeing how far they can go as a way to see how far they’ve come in blocking off their emotions. they’re nowhere near emotionally constipated as K, but after being hurt in the past, they perceive caring for people as a crux, so they basically want to see if they’ve ‘improved’ on that front.

but yeah, it’s definitely self-sabotage. and they realize this, but they’ve accepted that’s what they need. they’ve trusted people and been betrayed—it’s not something they want to go through again. and these aren’t, like, small betrayals like hanging out without you. to Rylan, they’re life-changing and they’d rather run than go through that again.

but yes !! if you have more analyses i’d love to hear them <3

[mediocre-noodle]

mom was watching HP: order of the phoenix while i was unloading the dishwasher so i got ✨ dallas ideas ✨

bc magic is more tolerated there, dallas doesnt have to age his body up. this means he can go around with years passing by and still look yk. 17-18 (the age he died :P) even though hes AT LEAST several hundred-thousand years.

when hes bored of traveling the magical world, he goes to hogwarts and roams the halls like the ghosts would. hes a well-known attraction and often looks out for the kids and helps w homework. you may also see him in classes.

^ he avoided the years that voldemort was in school so the bitch wouldn’t know what he’d look like.

^^ this is allowed bc when he first entered the HP universe, he asked dumbledore if it was fine (and gave a bit of info taht he was nonhuman). he did go to school for those 7 years though for the full ✨ experience ✨

so to add onto the ‘coming back when bored,’ he came back the year harry was entering his first year. lots of people were like omg its harry potter and then like OMG ITS THE RED CROW (or something.. idk yet. if the students know about him through a legend passed down from their parents and other people, most likely only a small group know his name.)

why is this important?? dallas is fucking protective and wouldnt let anything bad happen to harry istg. probably sees him as a younger sibling and relates to him a lot (saving to save the world trope i forgot the name). he’d pop up outta no where and be like ‘YOU WANNA ATTACK HARRY? MY BROTHER??? BITCH YOU THOUGHT!’ and then the enemies would be pissing themselves. (and harry would be like how tf did you know i was here??’)

wait omg harry sees a bit of his mom in dallas bc he has red hair and green eyes (will shapeshift to green eyes a lot to appear human.. wait what if dallas shifted to heterochromia green-yellow thatd be badass. wait^2 thats the sprite logo WHAHAHHD—) SOBBIGN I CANNOT.

skip is to dallas as dallas is to harry if you catch my drift (big brother figure) (RIP skip)

kinda wondering if dallas would interfere w the dursleys before hogwarts or after because uou have: 1.) before. dallas raises harry and harry is so more snarky and sassy. harry doesnt get abused or bullied or neglected ffs. he gets a caring brother figure and a found family (the syzygy (if you dont remember: aji, memphis, seraphina, and more to come)). less trauma probably. 2.) before. harry lives w the dursleys still but dallas randomly pops up in his life at certain points. theyre friends :] so when harry goes to hogwarts and sees dallas hes like :0 and then when he finds out dallas is like. immortal?? and not human (rumored to be—dallas never confirms it) hes like ‘???????? IM FRIENDS WITH AN IMMORTAL NONHUMAN SUPER-POWERFUL BEING???’ and then has to pretend to be chill about it and like he hasn’t met dally before. 3.) after. dallas befriends harry after he shows up in school bc he doesnt want pthers realizing soemthing is up. he feels bad about leaving harry to the dursleys though. he will often pop up during the summers and say hi :D 4.) after. dallas is like bro fucking finally harry is here!! lets go!! and has to pretend not to know what the dursleys are doing when harry opens up to them one night. dallas then basically sues the dursleys and gains uhh whats the word.. CUSTODY!! of harry. (why was i thinking child ownership ;-;). back to idea 1 where harry basically has a new brother figure and found family. he gets put in therapy, effective immediately. dallas will go too if that helps (god save yhat therapist. better get an NDA.) happy ending!

mkay thats all i have rn hope you enjoyed the meal teehee

oh and dallas is a ravenclaw

YESSSSSSS i havent cared about harry potter im years but i am EATING THIS UP!!!!!!! ABSOLUTELY NO CRUMBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

theres a rlly cool dynamic there i think cause like. harry is definitely a kind of ‘i dont need any help ill be fine’ and dallas is similar to that i feel? but in a way where he would know better and go ‘aintnoway youre pulling THAT one’ and forcefully help solve the situation

[heimdallsram]

Im such a sucker for your series 😭 its like my guilty pleasure, i can't wait to see their relationship develop,,, quick question (if thats all right,) do you have any tips on how to get heimdall's personality down? It seems like its a common wall that some of the fandoms writers are blocked by, i hope you can shed some insight on how you go about it👍

Of course! And I totally understand getting blocked by it, Heimdall is by no means easy to write; every scene he's in, it takes me a lot of thought. I'm not good with uppity, smarter than thou, asshole characters, but I usually do end up loving them regardless. I think it's a habit at this point, haha.

I've heard this analogy before, and I'm sure it's been spread around Tumblr many times, but a character is like an onion. There's the thinner outer layers, the ones they only want you to see that are usually vibrant, run over with color, but that is merely an illusion. When you peel to the deeper layers, they get thicker, shorter, more full of flavor and less colorful--unappealing, to some, or unappealing to themselves? That's for the beholder to decide. And when you get to the core, it's the best part for cooking, or writing, in this instance.

So Heimdall is an onion, much like any other character is an onion. A good reference would be, and don't laugh at me for this, Kratos. Kratos did not end up the man he has become without struggle and sacrifice; Heimdall, on the other hand, has not had to sacrifice or struggle to get where he has in life (from what we know of him in the game) at all. He's spoiled, been brought up by nine mothers who, by all regards, gave him the love Odin did not--but as we all know, you seek what you cannot have, and for Heimdall, that is both Odin's love and approval, and also... the desire to be useful.

It is a simple desire, when boiled down to it, but isn't that what most characters want? What they will never have? Freya wanted Baldur's happiness, selfishly, and his protection, but in the end, she could not have what she wanted; Kratos desired peace, but due to his curse and desire to protect Atreus, he could not have it until he struggled once more; Odin sought knowledge over death and the afterlife, but he paid the price for it through Ragnarök and through his countless marriages and children.

Heimdall's shallow, vain, bully-like personality is only a small part of what we are allowed to see of him. During his fight, and death, we see more of him, but only a fraction: he does not want anyone to control his fate, when he lives or dies. This is probably largely due to the fact that Odin goes to the extremes to get what he wants, even using his children to do so. I would not put it past him to have something to do with Heimdall's closeness to Bifrost, but that's something for later.

Back on to the topic, though, Heimdall is complex. Add on to what we know of him and what we can see and analyze, he has serious depth that was not explored, as he was a means to an end, in a sense. And to a degree, he probably knew that behind his false sense of bravado. He has gone all his life serving Odin, never doubting him, the most loyal Aesir in all of Asgard. But that kind of loyalty will never come without a price. Heimdall has no life save to monitor humanity and the wall; he has no trust in those around him, save Odin, because he knows what they are thinking, what their intentions are; he opens up, momentarily, about Gulltoppr, but even then, it's the more shallow attention seeking version, because animals are, above all, honest. They cannot lie.

Can you imagine such an existence? Living with the knowledge that you have to know what everyone thinks of you, how they doubt you, constantly, without any way of controlling it? Heimdall would have to had learned that control, as nothing is ever innate. That kind of life breeds isolation, loneliness, and above all, once more, the desire to be loved, useful. His mothers are no longer in the picture by the time the game begins, so we can assume that Odin does not give him any attention as they would have. And we do not know, truly, if he was separated from them or left willingly.

So, forgive me for the rambling tirade, but my tips, with all regards to what I have said, would be this:

• Heimdall will have hidden anger and mistrust. How would he attempt to overcome that, if persuaded to do so? How would that affect him if he had someone to trust, a lover, a friend, involved?

• A father figure will have precedence when a mother is absent. Heimdall is loyal to Odin. How does he choose to reflect that loyalty? How does he deflect his doubt about his father even as the rest of his family suffers?

• Heimdall does not seem the type to consider Odin's other children family. Would he be deeply impersonal and snarky? The idea of a family would likely revolt him. Think of how he mocked Atreus to Kratos; this is the mocking of a wounded child who pushes his inferiority and experiences onto others. Heimdall will struggle with this.

• Odin, for whatever reason, inspires loyalty. Heimdall is the enforcer of that loyalty. How far would he go for Odin? What is he driven by? The answer is up to you.

• For the sake of fanfiction, would Heimdall be open to a partner/lover? I honestly do not think so. He has proven to be doubtful and mistrustful from the get go, but, but, but, he has shown to also be mischievous for his own gain. But with time, effort, and proof that you are not a liar? Maybe he would consider it, and for Heimdall I think that would speak volumes.

• In addendum to that: actions vs words. Heimdall is mouthy as hell. But notice, in the game, that his actions do not match his words. He taunts, jeers, yes, but while fighting Atreus, he is calm, waiting for openings, chipping at his esteem. While in the fight with Kratos, as he is close to dying, he is far from calm: he is not in control. His actions are wild, frenzied, but they are also alive, while brief.

• Heimdall does not come easy to write, especially if you are doing a deep dive into his psyche. If you are writing something short, concise, and purely self indulgent, I would say not to worry too much about his portrayal. Be accurate, to a point, but let your ideas take you away. If you want to be more serious, more dark and brooding, take the onion approach as I did. Think about how, at each stage, how he would reveal himself, be the tiniest bit more vulnerable.

• There is obviously creative freedom to be respected here. So, you can imagine Heimdall as you like, truly, but blending that line between Canon and fiction is... chef's kiss. You could take it anywhere: he may be secretly introverted within, unable to cope with living in a society like Asgard, so he seeks the wall instead; or, pushed aside for Thor and Baldur, Odin sees no use for him except to walk the wall and slowly exposes the doubt he harbors. Really, the possibilities are endless!

This is getting very long, as I seem to have a habit of doing, but my point is this: treat him like he's something new and undiscovered. Write him from a point of view that is solely yours, even if it may seem inaccurate. Look at him like a fascinating new creature that you wish to study, decipher, poke and prod at; figure out what makes him tick.

Figure out what secrets he harbors deep within.

I hope this was helpful, anon! And if not to you, maybe someone else will get something out of this. 💕

[coveredinredpaint]

hi! my name is rex too and i think thats pretty cool

anyway, i was wondering if you had any tips on dressing feminine but like,,,, also being able to pass? or tips on being confident enough to not need to pass?

heyy that is pretty cool!!

im gonna be honest with you, i never really managed to pass before starting t. there were like 5 times ppl gendered me correctly but after that they immediatly "corrected" themselves. the only person who didnt was a toddler, i hope hes doing great.

all the tips and tricks ppl gave out never worked for me, never managed to figure out why, im thinking it was mostly my voice.

so i got absolutely no passing advice for you, but i can definitely tell you how to work on your confidence and say fuck you to societies ridiculous expectations

(it turned out longer than i distracted, i cant give concrete advice apparently my apologies)

tw: mention of bullying and some mental health stuff but nothing heavy

before i start i will say that it takes time. it takes time to learn and let go of this need to fit in. to learn to do your own thing even if you have to do it alone. to grow and learn who you want to be or are.

first we need to understand that expectations of how we should act or dress or look, whether based on our gender or not, are absolute bullshit. like straight up made up.

step one is kill the cop in your head. every time you judge yourself (or someone else) for something, ask why you care about that. most of the time its cause you have been taught in some way that what youre doing is not according to "the rules". this can be for the smallest things, like when i get really excited and stim about something i used to feel embarassed because "men dont act like that". sometimes i still feel that way. its not something you can just get rid of, so its important to actively affirm yourself that what youre doing is okay and that you are allowed to do what makes you happy.

dealing with yourself is already a hell of a challenge, but other people, that something else. i hope you live in an accepting area and i have heard many stories of people are queer fully accepted for it. but often thats sadly not yet the case. surely isnt for me at my school. there are people who are gonna make you feel like shit, who are gonna call you all the horrible things the voice in your brain calls you too. you are gonna wish you were "normal" sometimes, even if you dont really mean it.

going back to normal? going back in the closet? letting go of the clothes that make my feel better even on the most dysphoric days? fuck no, i finally started to get myself, my life back, im not sacrificing that for some teens whos names i dont even know. so you turn it around, no longer "why do they treat me like that" but "how dare they treat me like that" if they kick you while youre down you better bite their ankles and dont let go. most people who bully people who are "other" are terrified of what they see in us. we are living proof that their belief of how the world should work is very wrong. they call you a fag and a tranny? you better come to school next day in the gayest clothes you own. they call you an emo and bark at you? you better be dressed even more punk the next day. they may laugh at you, yell at you, even record you or push you around. it doesnt matter, they hold no power over who you are.

but please do not try and carry this alone. dont let yourself turn bitter. its is difficult to be treated like shit for simply existing. even when it doesnt hurt as much as it did its still exhausting. find someone to talk to, whether its a family member you trust, a friend, a mental health professional or other queer people online. its important not to suppress your feelings. get them out, by either talking about them or writing or making art or music.

know that its your life and you can live it however the hell you want. be kind to yourseld, be kind to others. if you are not where you want to be to right now you will in the future. cant really call it a life if you didnt live for it. it will get better, you just got to keep going and keep fighting.

[meet-at-tycho]

ahem.

no i fucking adore them both like WOW.. their laughter, i remember? one time i joined call with them and they were laughing when i joined from a joke and. it was the most beautiful sound in the whole world like i nearly dropped dead on the spot. it feels embarrassing to love them so much? but i do i really do!!!! like SORRY.. i cant help it, ive never been happier alright the least i could do is express it. its.

IT IS EMBARRASSING THOUGH, whenever im lonely i just pretend theyre with me. when im downstairs i talk quietly, to myself but in my head im telling them what im thinking about and my opinion on which fnaf game is truly the best okay like. when i sleep at night i pretend we have a sleep over because i think thats so sweet!!! infected my mind like a fucking PLAGUE actual vermin alright. SICKENING

i KNOW its. i know its weird and probably unsettling honestly but. ITS JUST HOW I COPE OKAY theyre so far away from me, i dont know if ill ever get to see them, yknow? NO NIGHT ON THE TOWN WITH MY BESTIES..... BREAK MY HEART its the worst. this is how i cope with that 😞 IDK like

MAN i could go on and on and ON about it, the way im constantly having fun? and even when nothings happening at all, im just happy to be there. happy to share the silence with them, happy to listen to what they have to say, hear about their days, their feelings ETC like

theyre the kind of people you feel like youve known yr whole life yknow? people who have just cemented themselves in yr life so certainly, people who are imbedded in my soul right. I KNOW IM BEING SAPPY but im allowed okay im SAD.. i see them in all the things i do, i mutter their words to myself, im literally constantly saying i miss them in the middle of conversations with my sibling, they get annoyed BUT I DO...

yknow whats funny? anytime i go downstairs with my other friends on call i completely forget which ITS JUST IN MY NATURE alright once i focus on something else im GONE okay im coming back 45 minutes later one of thems gone the other one is asleep like. OOPS.. i was analyzing fnaf to my sibling thats my bad. but with them? its at the top of my mind. cant stay and talk longer, need to go back upstairs they are waiting for me!!!

i think its cuz.. to me, every single moment is precious. admittedly i am still scared to lose them, its just.. instinct at this point. i want to remember every day i spend with them, every conversation and. GRRRRR. i love them so much 🥳🥳 THEY CALL ME CIRCUMBINARY THE WAY I BE ORBITING TWO PERFECT STARS like wow. OKAY...

arent i the luckiest guy in the world? to have not one, but TWO people who understand me so deeply, who go out of their way to know me, to spend time with me ? it makes me tear up when i think about it IM FUCKEDDD man its so over for me. ive always been an outcast, feel like i never fit anywhere but. i fit HERE, this is where i belong!!! thats how they make me feel every single day :]

knowing them has me seeing sunshine and rainbows for the first time in my entire life like. i worked fucking hard, i got myself out of hell but after that i was alone again... not anymore!!! happy.. im happy. all theyve had to do was be here and im more than content, all they had to do was EXIST!!!

stars align in the weirdest ways, but im glad they did 🥳🥳🥳 peace and love on the planet earf

[juzorei]

INTERNET BROKE, PEOPLE DIED THROWING THEMSELVES OFF THE WINDOW!

WE BELIEVE IN P'AOF ! 😭🛐🤌🏼

This Ep was soooo sooo good. Actually I admit that I was worried if we wont get any more PatPran. But P'Aof just slapped my face and said "surprise mf!"😭🤌🏼❤ Thats why I love that man. WE CANT EXPECT HIS MOVES I SWEAR!

This was so cute scene. Them making breakfast and all. PRAN MADE OMLETE FOR PAT. YOU GUYS GET IT?! JUST LIKE NON MADE OMLETE FOR OHM IN SAFE HOUSE. Oh my god I dont know if it's sound crazy of me but I AM NOT LEAVING THE TINIEST BIT OF SIMILARITY OF PATPRAN AND OHMNON.

Planting and naming it Pat and Pran's love sprout and fist bumbing. I LOVE THEM. THEY ARE SO AAAHHHHHHH!!!! PatPran is simple yet they are very special. They have this something that only they have. I dont even make sense now. GOD I even doubt my existence after this.

I kinda had an idea that Pat and Pran will play themselves in the play as Tian and Chief. BUT HELL I HAD NO IDEA THEY WILL CHANGE THE ROLE. But common again!! ITS PATPRAN!!! Once again they just broke everything and said there is no top bottom in our relationship!! Sheesh I love that fucking so much!! AND MY BEST BOYS KORN AND WAI!! I am now sure that they are the biggest PatPran shippers. They volunteered to make sure that we are fed well with PatPran kiss.🤣❤ I love how Korn's and Wai's relationship got better to the point they became the besties🤣😂❤ Look at them giving a demo of kiss to PatPran😏😌❤

Yes I miss them so much already and Im gonna miss them forever. But Im so happy. This journey of love has been the best thing happened in my life. Sometimes ill wonder what if I never came across this BL world. I can't imagine that cuz I cant imagine a life without PatPran. I was at my worst when I met PatPran. They became my comfort zone and still they are. They will always be my comfort zone. I am happy that we got to see PatPran story. Im happy and thankful that they allowed us to experience everything with them. We laughed, cried, smiled, screamed and did so many things with them. They gave us a whole lifetime memory. And im gonna hold that memory close to my heart, forever.

Now it's time to send PatPran back to their own world. It's a goodbye yet not a goodbye. Thank you P'Aof, Ohm, Nanon, Jimmy, Drake, Love, Milk, Mark and every single one that made Bad Buddy happen. Everyone!

Ohm and Nanon made PatPran come to life at its best. Like perfectly. The best version of PatPran. Im saying this again that only they can do PatPran. No one else.

I LOVE YOU PATPRAN AND WILL MISS YOU BOTH!❤😭

[acaciapines]

What's your favorite relationship in the au? Or if that's too broad, top five relationships?

he he im taking top five lol. these are. somewhat in An Order but also not really dont think about it.

Luz and Mari: like, come on. i have to do luz and her daemon!! when i first sat down to start writing this fic and figured out what exactly was going to be the driving relationship at the core of the fic...it was the two of them. the owl house itself is so much about luz and coming to terms with who she is and how she GOOD and amazing even if what she wants and does isnt like, society-typical, and being able to externalize that between these two has been so so so fun.

King and The Collector: i wasnt supposed to love them so much help. but...man, i have fallen in LOVE with the relationship between these two, and how absolutely messy and complicated it is. they care about each other so much. the collector doesnt know how to show that. king doesnt know how he can after everything the collector has done. they are both so good and important to me

Luz and Hunter: okay. look. of course they were going to end up on here. what is there even to say about them? they go through so much together and come out the other side and dont really know who they are anymore, just that if they didnt have the other, they would, 100%, be dead. and thats...certainly a thing to hold.

The Collector and Firefly: firefly sees a sad child and says is anybody going to adopt that. and doesnt even wait for an answer. but being serious its so much fun to write firefly and the collector and their attempts to understand each other--firefly understands the collector in a way king cant because shes gone through something similar, and she very much sees a kindred spirit in the collector even if they dont know what that is yet.

Luz and Eda: thats her mom...thats her daughter...writing all the fumbles as eda attempts to be a good parent for luz and has to stumble through learning about humans, and luzmari trying to be a good daughter when theyre scared it means replacing camila, even though family doesnt work like that...oh its so GOOD its so FUN i LOVE THEM.

and of course, some of the many honorable mentions:

luz and amity! (teaching each other to be happy and live and be themselves and luz is only able to be herself bc of amity and amity is only able to be herself bc of luz and they were each the thing that allowed the other to finally stop repressing Their Respective Issues....girlfriends of all time....)

willow and gus and amity! (the layers to their friendships is everything okay. the messy broken friendship of willow and amity. gus befriending amity with none of that baggage and willow feeling hurt still but not wanting to ruin gus's friendships and amity not knowing how to make things better so she just pretends it never happened ITS SO FUN WHEN I FOCUS ON THEM--)

eda and firefly! (learning to co-parent with your owl curse is actually the funniest thing in the world)

amity, edric, and emira! (they are in no way a huge focus but i LOVE amity being a bitey baby sibling okay. no holds barred she WILL beat her siblings at literally anything. she will go for the kill w no prompting and its DELIGHTFUL)

firefly and raine! (firefly is SO salty that raine broke up with eda okay. shes so so offended on eda's behalf. but its okay they work it out and now raine has. two girlfriends? and one is an owl. this is fine)

katya, amber, and derwin! (the bats are so so silly and so so stupid and giving them a pov was the best choice i ever made actually)