#so the short and sweet of it is I Think It's Funny. And They'd Be Terrible Together. Which Is Why It's Funny.

[writinginpinkpink]

a wish come true.

dad'sbestfriend!jim hopper x fem!reader

warnings: age gap (reader is 21 and Hopper is in his 30s-40s), cheating, masturbation, low smut, just yearning for a big bearded man.

author's note: in my journey of trying to write smut, still don't like what i got so i just showed a snippet.

masterlist. | requests opened! | one shot!

You wanted him. You yearned for him. For the past three years, the chief of the police department had been your last thought before sleep and the first when you woke up. For three long years, he was the one you thought about when your hands slipped between your thighs.

But he would never want you. Maybe that was what made you want him even more. The forbidden nature of it—the fact that he was your dad's best friend. The secrecy, the dirtiness—it only fueled the fire.

But enough was enough. You couldn’t spend another summer pining after a man who probably still saw you as a little girl.

That’s why you decided to date Tommy Thompson. He was quiet, shy, and gentle. He probably loved you, and you might’ve loved him back—if your heart wasn’t already consumed by someone else.

Tommy was sweet, with his crooked glasses and nervous smile. He said he didn’t want to take your purity away. But right now, you couldn’t care less about that as you pushed him toward the outdoor bathroom, letting your towel fall to reveal a white bikini that left almost nothing to the imagination.

He froze like a deer caught in headlights, his mouth agape and his wide eyes fixed on you.

"W-what are you doing?" he stammered, standing up straighter and fumbling to adjust his glasses.

"What do you think I’m doing?" you teased, a sheepish smile curling your lips as your finger trailed down his chest, tracing his abdomen and stopping at the hem of his shorts.

"Wait," Tommy said, grabbing your hands, his breath already shaky. "Are you sure?"

"Of course, baby," you murmured, biting his earlobe, your hands moving downward with intent.

But then, he stopped you again, his grip firmer this time.

"I can’t," he said, gently pushing you away.

"What do you mean?" you asked, glancing at your reflection in the mirror behind him. Doubt crept in. "Is it me?"

"No, no, no!" he blurted, shaking his head frantically. "It’s not you, I swear. I’m just...nervous. I can’t," he admitted, looking down. "Literally."

You followed his gaze. "Oh."

Wrapping your towel back around yourself, you turned away, a mix of frustration and pity swirling inside you. Maybe this was the reality of dating boys, you thought, stepping out of the bathroom and leaving Tommy behind.

As you walked past Hopper, deep in conversation with your dad, your mind wandered to him—how he would’ve reacted. You imagined him pushing you against the sink, his hands rough, his voice dark and teasing. "Dirty girl," he’d growl in your ear. "Dirty, dirty girl...moaning my name while your dad’s just outside the door."

The fantasy sent a shiver down your spine, snapping you back to reality just as Tommy emerged from the bathroom, his hands shoved deep in his pockets.

"I think I’m gonna go," he said quietly, his face flushed with embarrassment.

"Yeah, sure," you replied, standing up to walk him out. You didn’t blame him for wanting to leave.

"Don’t be too hard on yourself," you added softly, your tone gentle as you kissed him lightly on the lips. "It’s totally normal."

And with that, he left, leaving you alone with thoughts you knew you shouldn’t be having—but couldn’t seem to shake.

-

Those stupid blue jeans, so tight around his thick thighs. You couldn't help but notice how they clung to him, every curve visible.

I wish they'd squeeze my neck, you thought, taking a slow sip of your grape juice. Funny how, even at 21, your dad still refused to let you drink wine at dinner.

To him, you're still his precious little girl. And you might look the part—perfectly curled hair, a touch of light lip gloss, eyes wide and innocent as ever. With your appearance, Daddy would never suspect how his darling princess would cry herself to sleep, longing for just one moment with his best friend.

Just once. He'd be your first. How romantic, under the moonlight, a cigarette dangling loosely from his lips as his hands moved across your body—

"Isn't that right, Y/N?" your mother suddenly chimed in, laughing as she tossed her head back. Hopper grinned behind his glass, taking a slow sip of his wine.

"Oh, yes..." you murmured, offering a small smile, unsure of what you had just agreed to.

"Now, if you’ll excuse me," Hopper said, placing his napkin atop his empty plate after lightly dabbing it against his lips—his gorgeous lips. "It’s getting late, and a storm seems to be rolling in. Best I hit the road before it gets worse."

"Oh, please, no!" your mother protested, rising to her feet and motioning for him to sit back down. "We couldn’t possibly let you leave with a storm on the way—not when we have a perfectly good room to spare!"

"The woman’s got a point, man," your father added, standing as well and placing his hands on your mother’s waist. "Come on, it’s not like you’ve never stayed over before," he said with a warm smile.

You swallowed hard, clasping your thighs together as the thought crept in: How will I sleep tonight knowing he’s just a room away? You could already feel the heat spreading, imagining him so close. Would he hear you? Those little gasps as you touched yourself under the covers, whispering his name over and over again. Maybe he would. Maybe he’d even like it.

"I don’t know..." he muttered, scratching the back of his neck as his eyes darted around the room. Then, his gaze landed on you. "Maybe you’re right," he said with a soft smile. "Maybe I should stay over."

Your heart skipped a beat. For a moment, you were sure he’d changed his mind because of you. The thought sent a thrill through your chest, almost enough to propel you upstairs to dial Beth's number, ready to spend the night analyzing every possible meaning behind his decision.

But you didn’t. Instead, you rose from the table with a calmness you didn’t feel. "Good choice," you said with a quick smile, before turning toward your mother. "Mom, I think I’ll get ready for bed," you added, stifling a fake yawn. "I’m so, so tired."

Your parents practically tripped over themselves to send their little princess off to rest, showering you with affection as you headed toward the stairs. But Hopper didn’t move. His eyes stayed on you, different from the doting gaze of your parents. It was sharper, probing, as if he saw through your sweet, innocent act.

And you wondered: Would he like what he’d find underneath? The dirty, deprived version of you?

When you entered your room, it felt like stepping back in time. Not much had changed since you were a kid—the same plushies neatly arranged on the shelves, the same faded wallpaper, the same dresser with its slightly chipped paint.

Your eyes landed on a framed picture resting atop the dresser: you and Tommy at the county fair. He was grinning from ear to ear, a cotton candy stick in his hand, while you offered a polite smile, a lollipop clasped between your fingers.

You remembered that day vividly. You’d sucked on that lollipop with all the exaggerated intention you could muster, one of many futile attempts to push Tommy into breaking his shy shell. It hadn’t worked—of course it hadn’t.

But the thought made you wonder: Would it have worked with Hopper?

Would he have roughly told you to stop? Or maybe grabbed you, dragging you into some dirty, hidden spot to take you right then and there? Perhaps he’d wait until you were in his car, his large hands slowly unknotting the delicate strap at the back of your dress, unraveling you bit by bit.

You exhaled shakily, your hands moving almost instinctively, mimicking the imagined actions of Hopper. Your fingertips ghosted over your collarbone, tracing downward.

Maybe he’d have made you suck his thumb instead, you thought, biting your lip as your hands brushed over your chest, teasing yourself. Maybe he’d play with your nipples, his touch rough and claiming.

You stumbled backward, your knees hitting the edge of the bed before you fell onto the mattress, legs instinctively parting toward the door.

The door wasn’t locked. Anyone could walk in. He could walk in.

You closed your eyes, the fantasy consuming you. He’d slap your ass and your pussy, growling, "How dare you touch what’s mine?"

You were so lost in your thoughts that you almost missed the soft knock at the door. But the sound of a forced cough snapped you out of it. Panicked, you scrambled to cover yourself, your hands darting to shield your exposed body.

“No need to stop what you’re doing, sweetie,” Hopper said with a sly smile, casually running a hand through his hair. “Just came to tell you your mother’s asking if you want dessert... but it looks like you’re already preoccupied with something else.” His grin widened, clearly enjoying your sudden, flustered reaction.

“It’s not what you think!” you blurted out, your cheeks burning.

“Isn’t it?” he asked, quietly closing the door behind him. The lock clicked into place, sending a shiver down your spine. He tilted his head, his eyes roaming your body as he slowly moved closer. “Because I’m thinking someone’s little princess isn’t quite as innocent as she seems.”

“I was just... changing,” you stammered, frozen in place as he stepped nearer. His presence loomed over you, his knee pressing into the mattress beside you as he leaned down, close enough for you to feel the heat of his breath against your skin. “I wasn’t doing... you know... that.”

He laughed softly, his voice low and teasing. “I don’t know what you mean. Why don’t you tell me?”

Your breath hitched as he licked his lips, his gaze never leaving yours. His hands slid behind your back, firm but deliberate, pulling you closer as he gently eased you down onto the bed.

Hopper hovered above you, his weight pressing into the mattress as he leaned closer. His hand trailed along your side, deliberate and slow, making your breath hitch. You didn’t dare move, unsure if you wanted to push him away or pull him closer.

“You’re shaking, sweetie,” he murmured, his voice low and rough. “What’s got you so worked up?”

“I-I’m not,” you stammered, your voice barely above a whisper, but you knew he could feel the tremble in your body beneath his touch.

“Oh, I think you are.” His grin widened, his thumb brushing along your jawline as he tilted your face up to meet his. “And I think I know why.”

Your heart raced, pounding so loudly you were sure he could hear it. His lips hovered near yours, just close enough for you to feel their warmth.

“You’ve been thinking about me, haven’t you?” he whispered, his voice dripping with smug satisfaction. “That’s what all this is about, isn’t it? All those little thoughts you’ve been hiding, all those things you want me to do to you.”

You couldn’t speak, couldn’t deny it. The truth was written all over your face.

“I bet you think about it all the time,” he continued, his tone taunting as his hand slid lower, grazing your hip. “When you’re lying in bed, pretending to be so sweet and innocent. But we both know better, don’t we?”

His words made your head spin, a mix of shame and excitement coursing through you.

“Hopper, I...” you started, but your voice faltered.

“Shh,” he whispered, pressing a finger to your lips. “You don’t have to say a word, sweetie. I already know everything.”

He leaned down, his lips brushing your ear as he spoke, his voice sending shivers down your spine.

“Now, why don’t you show me just how innocent you really are?”

As Hopper leaned in closer, his eyes flickered to the bedside table. A picture of you and Tommy stared back at him—his arm around your shoulders, his awkward grin almost painfully sweet. Hopper’s expression darkened as he reached out, grabbing the frame and turning it facedown without a second thought.

“That kid?” he scoffed, shaking his head as he returned his gaze to you. “You think he’s a man?” His lips curled into a smirk, his voice low and dripping with disdain.

“Hopper, he’s—” you tried to defend, but he cut you off with a sharp laugh, silencing you.

“I don’t want to hear about him,” he said firmly, leaning in so close that his nose brushed yours. “Because after tonight, you’re going to understand what it means to have a real man.”

Your breath caught as his words sank in, their weight sending heat coursing through your body. Hopper’s hands, strong and rough, slid to your hips, gripping you firmly as he towered over you.

“That boy couldn’t even begin to handle you,” he continued, his tone taunting, but there was an edge of something darker—something possessive. “But me?” His thumb brushed the bare skin just above your waistband, and you couldn’t suppress the shiver that followed. “I’ll ruin you for anyone else.”

[bunny-jpeg]

Hi I’m sorry if your not doing the bakery anymore! But if you are can I please have a nanaimo bar and a tiramisu with a side of bubble tea served by Max Verstappen?

I love your writing so much!

bakery menu

want to suggest your own order? send it now! i am adding more prompts to the list!! i'd love to hear from you! i do really like this, i feel like daddy kink hasn't be suggested enough! also, i think ya'll really like when i write max! which thank you so muuuuuch! i love writing him. i have made him a bit more of a dom than i usually do, i am a sub!max truther lol.

nanaimo bar ("who's my pretty girl? c'mon say it.") + tiramisu (“my little slut to ruin.”) + bubble tea (daddy kink)

cw: smut/pwp, daddy kink, collars, oral sex (m receiving), dom!max, mean!max, "kitty"!reader, dirty talk

max never really liked to watch highlights or old races. the race itself felt like it was imprinted on his bones, memorized in his muscles. but for a boring sunday night during the off season, he didn't mind a gin & tonic and sitting in front of the couch watching them back to back online.

he wasn't alone. over the last six months he has had such a cute little companion. a little girlfriend. you were stunning, funny and over all sweet. you were perfect and most of the grid adored you. but max felt that if they knew what you two got up to in the off-season, they'd be even more endeared to max's little kitty.

you were a good girl for daddy today, so you got to snuggle with him on the couch. he laid out with you on top of him, your head on his chest as you linked your fingers with him.

"you had such a good day today, kitten." he said quietly as he rubbed your head with his other hand. earlier you had your head in his lap as he drank through two g&ts. but now you two were just cuddled up.

you looked at him and replied with a slight smile, "thank you, daddy." then closed your eyes when he want in for a kiss.

he smiled into the kiss and held your head close to him. bunyou still tasted like the lingering bubblegum of your lip gloss. but that was smeared all over his lips by now.

you were in a red bull t-shirt and panties. the shirt did nothing to cover the swell of your ass from him. he kissed the side of your head and you leaned into his touch.

"who's my pretty girl? c'mon say it."

"i am." you said as you looked at him with the sweetest expression, "i'm your pretty girl." you rubbed up against max.

he reached down and groped your ass before he kissed the roundness of your cheek. he could feel himself getting harder in his shorts.

he chuckled, "i ruined you. my little slut to ruin." then kissed your face some more. he loved the feeling of you against him. you really were the prettiest thing he had ever seen.

from the moment he saw you at the pool party. your laughter ran through clear as day, and max knew that he wanted, if not, needed you.

"does daddy need something taken care of?"you asked as you rubbed up against max. you heard his breath hitch in his throat.

"you little tease." he said as he squeezed your hand, "why don't you make yourself useful then?" then rubbed his cock up against your front.

you could never say to no to him, just as much as he couldn't say no to you. you lifted your head and exposed the shiny black leather collar that you wore during your 'fun time' with max.

you slinked off the bed and kneeled then watched him plant his feet on either side of you, giving you a full view of his clothed cock.

"you're nothing without me." he said as he rubbed your cheek, "you're just good for keeping my cock wet, pretty girl." his words burned in your brain and made you core hot. you watched him pull his hard cock out of his pants and you leaned in to give the tip a proper, wet kiss.

he stilled for a moment before his hand was in your hair and guiding your mouth fully onto his impressive size. max could be a mean daddy dom sometimes, talking down to you in a patronizing way.

but, fucking hell did it make you hot all over. it was like being dragged over hot coals. it hurt but it left you yearning for more.

max guided your head up and down his cock and growled, "pretty little slut, i've ruined you for other men, haven't i? guess you can't leave now, stuck with me.' he gripped the hair near the scalp and rolled his hips a little up, nudging his cock further.

your eyes closed but you were met with a firm, but not hard, smack on the cheek. you opened your eyes and looked up at him, mouth still full of cock.

"eyes on me. i'd hate to punish you tonight, you were doing so good." he lightly scolded, he even went as far as to wag his finger in your face like a isolate animal.

you moaned and rubbed your thighs together as you continued to orally pleasure him. his cock was a nice weight in your mouth as you felt the fat tip nudged against the back of your throat.

you took it all in stride, you enjoyed the feeling of his cock in your mouth. he was simply so good in your mouth. if he wasn't bullying your throat, he was bullying your pussy. he was making his kitty moan and paint, occasionally squeal and squirm.

but max kept his kitty on a short leash. (sometimes literally).

he loved the sight of you in a collar and on your knees. your bright eyes shined at him as you continued to suck him off. he continued to move your head up and down.

"you look the best like this." he admitted, "on your knees for your daddy." he chuckled, "if i wasn't so protective over you, maybe i'd invite norris or leclerc over. see what i get every night." he yanked on your hair a little, "but it would take a long for me to watch you suck someone else off. you're meant for me." he said as he tapped your nose.

you nodded obediently, like a good girl and moved your head. the grip on you was tighter and the heat pooled in your gut. you felt spit down your chin and onto your breasts from having your throat nudged at.

max sighed and closed his eyes for a moment as he really let you pleasure him. he could feel the heat in his gut and he started to tense up.

"you feel so good." he said, "you're so good for me. that's it, take all of me." he groaned as he really started to shove his cock into the back of your throat. it choked you a little with each hard thrust.

he cursed under his breath as it really started to light up parts of his brain. he groaned before he pulled his cock out of your mouth easily and jerked it a few times before he came all over your face. spurts of cum landed on your cheeks and down your lip. he almost came twice from the erotic image.

if only his phone were closer, he could have a little something for when he was on the road. but for now he'd have to settle with watching you eagerly wipe the cum off your face and lick your fingers and palm.

you looked at him, breathing heavily. you looked like such a perfect kitten for him. you said to him, "did i do good, daddy?" your tone was so honest, it made his cock twitch.

"of course you did. you're always a good kitty for daddy." he chuckled as he rubbed the top of your head, "you'll always be good enough for me."

he'd eventually get up and get a damp cloth for you to wipe your face. then he'd put you back where you were before and cuddle you up in his arms. safe and sound, like a good kitty.

[meowzfordayz]

how they speak up for you — mitsuri, shinobu, kyojuro, sanemi, muichiro

Author’s Note: short and sweet, and hopefully a lil funny too. 😆

how they speak up for you — mitsuri, shinobu, kyojuro, sanemi, muichiro

Kanroji Mitsuri x Reader, Kocho Shinobu x Reader, Rengoku Kyojuro x Reader, Shinazugawa Sanemi x Reader, Tokito Muichiro x Reader

Word Count: ~800

CW: explicit language, mild sexual content

Emergency Request Fulfilled: could you write comfort for when Their S/o like absolutely hates speaking up for themselves, like someone could be walking all over them and they'd be like "Oh, its fine" bc conflict= worst enemy? I would like to request Muichiro (love him sm) and Sanemi if that's okay, and the rest you can decide (-if you want to add more.)

~faqs~

Mitsuri will be all over the situation (in a good way, ofc 😌)

“Baby, didn’t you want your drink hot?” —> she’s already staring daggers at the barista who made your drink 😒

“Hm?”

You do your best to conceal the pinch of your eyebrows, as well as the goosebumps raising on your arms 🥶

“I thought cold drinks made you cold, and you don’t like being cold?”

… “Hm?”

She’s not buying your nonchalance 🙃

“That’s it.” Uh oh. “I’m getting you your drink made right.”

😳🫣🫠

“Nonono, Mitsuri, it’s fiiine.” 😭

Arms crossed, her lips purse, eyes narrowed as you weakly grin and take a big sip 😄

“If you won’t let me get you another one, then at least wear my sweater?”

🤯 “Okay!” 🤭

So maybe she’s wearing a cropped tank top underneath — you’re only a mere mortal after all 

— #oops my thirst made an appearance 😅

Short girlfriend = scary girlfriend

And that’s a compliment 😎

Shinobu doesn’t need height, bulk, or a dick to defend you

Her scathing tongue and unnerving stare are plenty

Not to mention, she’ll go full Karen if need be, but the more eloquent, calculating, deceptively sweet version 😌

She can make anyone feel like a complete idiot in 2-3 sentences, give or take 

Which does include you, but you don’t argue too often 😅

Basically:

It’s highkey hot when she speaks up for you 🤭

But it may or may not make you cry when her sharpness is directed toward you 🥲

Fortunately, you in distress is also one of few things that immediately softens her — at least, when she’s the reason for it 🥺

Kyojuro always tries to solve your problems for you

Not bc he thinks you’re incapable, and not w/o your expressed consent/prior communication

But he just hates seeing you unhappy, uncomfortable, unsafe — really anything that isn’t grinning and laughing

He understands there’s a time and place for more difficult and painful emotions, but why on earth wouldn’t he go out of his way to ensure those times and places are as few and far between as possible????? 🤨

So, obvi, he more than willingly goes out of his way ☺️

“Do you want me to say something?” his quiet breath warms your ear, softening the frustration growing in your chest

“I dunno,” you sigh, gesturing hopelessly at the person who’d just cut you in line, “We’re all going to the same place anyway.”

“True,” he shrugs, “But that was quite rude and noticeable of them.”

“Do you want to say something?” you tease, elbowing his side with amused fondness

“Not if it discomforts you.”

“It wouldn’t discomfort me,” you mumble, cheeks darkening nonetheless, “You’re so cute.”

Albeit, you aren’t sure whether to feel proud or embarrassed when he somehow intimidates the person who cut you into leaving altogether 😅

On one hand, you know Sanemi has your back ☺️

On the other hand, you aren’t 100% positive that that’s a good thing 😬

“I swear, does that bitch even know I exist?!” 😤

… 🫣

“I bet she doesn’t! Otherwise she wouldn’t dare treat you like-” 😤

“And this is why she doesn’t know you exist.” 🥲

“Pardon?” 😐

“Sanemi, I love you, and I so appreciate how ready to go to war you are for me, but-”

“Ooh darling, you have no idea. Go to war? I will be the war for you.” 😤

“So sweet,” your eyes roll, “How about you just let me handle it?”

“And how are you handling it?” he scoffs, “With smiley face emojis?” 🙄

…

“You deserve kindness and honesty. Not her manipulative bitch shit.”

“I’ll block her.”

“You what?!” 😳

“Would that suffice?” 😅

“Actually… yeah.” Sanemi is very surprised. Gushing now, “I’m so fucking proud of you.” 🥰

It’s kind of alarming when Muichiro speaks up for you

Bc you get a faint taste of what he was like before he’d really opened up to love 😕

And that Tokito Muichiro is sharp and cold as steel w/ a -139% tolerance for bullshit

Impossible to impress 😬

But your Muichiro hugs you when you’re feeling low, rests his chin on your shoulder while you do your best to draft a stern, confident text msg to your asshole ���friend”, and is more than happy to tell you what he would do were he in your shoes

… you usually ignore his advice 😅

Buuut sometimes he reaches over and hits SEND before you can stop him 🫠

“MUI! I was going to delete some of that!” 😭

“Nah, it’s great as is.” 😎

[heartfullofleeches]

Resending the ask with the right pronouns this time 👍

How would Jasper react with a darling who would want to stuff them full of their eggs? (Can be taken as suggestive or not:3)

Jasper would act like it's so scandalous when the reversal is all they ever think about. They'd agree because they can never say no to their love's desires and it'd not like they haven't had the same thought before- A hybrid like Mouse Darling would be naturally smaller and the thought of someone short and sweet like them trying to stuff Jasper full of eggs makes its brain feel funny.

-

Mouse Darling: Jasper! Do you want my eggs? :D

Jasper: Y-Your eggs? How perverse- I didn't think you were that type of person, mousey... Nor did I think that was possible for mice.. Toys, maybe?

[Mouse Darling holds up an omelet they made]

Jasper, disappointed: Oh...You meant those eggs. [Sighs] A snake can dream.

[itriedwritingandhereiam]

I recently wrote an interaction between Chloe and Damian for a fic (it was really short albeit) and before that, I'd never really thought about their friendship. The best part about it was that it was 16 year old Chloe & 12 year old Damian and that just made it even better.

They booth have this certain vibe to them, equally bitchy/snarky (in the most affectionate terms) and would not hesitate to kill a bitch for the loved ones. I think they'd have a mutual respect, some fun banter and enjoy having a go at each other. They're so funny.

Essentially:

Chloe *disdainfully: Wayne

Damian *scrutinizing: Bourgeois. Still chasing after mother dearest, Claudia?

Chloe: Still breaking peasant arms and hushing it up with Daddy's money?

Damian: That's rich coming from Daddy's girl.

Chloe: I'd peg you as a mama's boy but I heard she's not in the picture

Damian: Barbie Bitch

Chloe: Himbo's bastard

Damian: Gum under the table

Chloe: Last season's pair

Damian: L

Chloe: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮

Damian: ╭∩╮( •̀_•́ )╭∩╮

Chloe: Just wait for Vale to sniff you out you little gremlin. Front page news, feral child of billionnaire play boy flips off over seas heiress.

Damian: Would you prefer they find you in a ditch

Chloe: I could squish you with my pinky half pint

Damian *proudly displaying self restraint: ( •̀ - •́ )

Damian: The snack table seems rather crowded, go spill wine on the red head with obnoxious laugh and I'll smuggle some hors d'oeuvres.

Damian: She stole my pencil in sixth period yesterday and vengeance will be sweet.

Chloe *who is totally up for petty revenge ad snacks: Get me a cannoli and we have a deal

Damian: Bet

[macking-cheese]

My brain has turned to mush bc of this big green insect and their stupid parents (Piston, oc by @numberonetribble )

First pic: Bee's just glad no one died lol (he'd also be proud if he wasn't about to have a spark attack worrying abt his kid flying off the track)

Bad Influence Breakdown my beloved,,,,

Bonus bc I thought this was funny as hell (I photoshopped the profile)

It's me I'm friends lol

Haha secret!

Bonus bonus bc I meant to post this before we got a confirmed weapon design for Piston

I hc that with the story behind Bee's scar, it's like, more than surface-level. Long story short, optic gutted out, not all internal damage was repairable, nor was the replacement optic 100% compatible. Just the pros of being stranded on Fuck You planet in the middle of Go Die galaxy. So he kinda just has to deal with it, and bright lights n certain stimuli tend to corrupt the sensory input and cause Not Good Happenings TM (totally not projecting an epileptiform disorder onto the guy, haha definitely)

Now, I know that Piston has a tendency to be disrespectful and "I do what I want", however in my heart I like to think they'd probably feel bad after accidentally hurting someone close to them, especially if it's something more serious (idk that's just my mindset with the family dynamics and I think it'd be sweet)

[fruity-fruition]

I LEGITIMATELY COULDN'T STOP THINKING OF THIS STUPID PJSEKAI MOVIE I HAVEEE TO YAP ABOUT IT.

I'll keep it spoiler free until the border section!!

Oh my GOD I truly didn't expect it to be as good as it was. Granted... I'll be honest... My expectations were prettyyy low. I mean, they have to juggle twenty (20) characters, excluding the virtual singers. That was a highly demanding task and I thought I'd enjoy it purely because I get to see my stupid little guys on the big screen.

And while I do admit some units got brushed off more than others, they handled it so much better than I imagined!! The focus was definitely on L/N but VBS and N25 was definitely prominent. unfortunately I have to say WxS got the short end of screening... MMJ too... It was a little disappointing in that aspect but there were little scenes that were REALLY really sweet. Minori and Tsukasa made my entire theatre laugh without fail oh they're so stupiddd.

Im going to go on about some characters that I remember the most screentime of!

Ichika: You could definitely FEEL that she's the it girl lmao!! I have to admit that she was kinda worrying me a bit at the beginning due to the repetitive nature of the same thing being brought up but she really shines through! Ichika my girl you were awesome... And there was a scene with her that genuinely made my stomach drop and my heart clench oh my godd the sound cut off on that scene and her reaction held tension SO WELL.

Akito and Ena: They got? A shocking amount of screentime? Not complaining at all btw! They were awesome!

Minori: Ohhh she was so unbelievably cute oh my god Minori you rock. I wish you had more screentime but honestly, out of the MMJ, she and Shizuku probably got the most

Kanade: Had this kinda funny scene that really stuck with me because of how casual she is about it and how sweet she was.

Emu: ???this one LEGITIMATELY shocked me. She would've been lower than Rui if it weren't for THE scene that really caught me by surprise! I didn't expect the movie to bring it up, but I was really happy to see her character story bleed into the movie, especially since it made sense with what they were planning to do! It was also super sweet....

Tsukasa: Honestly, I think out of all the unit leaders, Tsukasa got the worst deal. Rivalling Minori but only losing by a margin. I was kinda sad because he is my favourite but the scenes that he was in were really well executed! When he meets Miku for the first time was legitimately funny. He could NOT catch a break at all in this entire thing, my guy was getting jumped bro. There was also a scene, similar to Ichika, that made my stomach turn in so many different ways.

But honestly, the gap between screentimes isn't all that jarring! It's just unfortunate that if you haven't played the game and gotten attached, you'll probably have a harder time caring about any of them since the movie is forced to jump front and back.

It sounds like I'm critiquing it a lot but I really DID enjoy it!! I was so shocked at the montage of all the failed Miku calls and I legitimately didn't think they'd go that far. Granted, Mafuyu was already pushing it but man! It was still heavy. The movie handles its sorrows and emotions really well and even though they keep jumping front and back, they get you to care a LOT about what was happening, even to the side characters.

And oh my GOD don't get me STARTED on that one Miku and Kaito scene I love them so so much!! I really like the idea of sibling Miku and Kaito and that scene genuinely had me in shambless :(

My experience!!

I'm too broke to cosplay lmao so I ended up doing a closet cosplay of Tsukasa's school uniform! No one noticed but it was very important to me... I also DIYed Nene's old butterfly thing on my headband so that was great!

ALSO DEFINITELY BRING A FRIEND ALONG. I brought a good friend of mine (Ena and Kohane enthusiast) and bro I'm pretty sure the blood circulation in our hands were cut off by how hard we were gripping each other. The sharp inhale every single time our favs appear added go the experience

Oh it was honestly the best movie experience I've ever had. My country is a pretty well mannered (and boring sometimes) country, so we never really do those yelling and cheering during movies. And I'm SO grateful for that because being able to hear all the unit songs without cheering I think added to my hype. It just felt more immersive!

But ohh as soon as the after show started, people started talking and cheering on the virtual singers. I've never been in a movie theatre with people hyping the performance up so it was definitely fun! I locked eyes with another Tsukasa fan and showed her my Tsukasa and Nene plushie and they showed me their Tsukasa nui from a far!! It was so nicee :((

After the show, everyone started trading shikishis that they wanted! I heard someone trading Len for Movie Miku, some trading Minori and Kanade. It was such a friendly vibe I was so unbelievably happy. Tsukasa is one of the more famous characters so I didn't expect anyone to want to trade it with me, so I was already pretty content with my Ichika bc she's rad as hell too.

IMAGINE to my surprise, when me and my friend walked out, we saw this guy about to throw away his Tsukasa shikishi. I PANICKED. I LEGITIMATELY DID and yelled out "DO YOU WANT TO TRADE?"

This guy turned to me, looked at my Ichika, and nodded so fast. As soon as he got his hands on it, he giggled (squeaked. I really couldn't tell what noise he made), and literally JUMPED in joy. LIKE. LEGS TUCKED, JUMPING WITH A YIPPEE.

I LITERALLY DONT KNOW IF HE HATED TSUKASA, LOVED ICHIKA, OR BOTH BECAUSE THAT WAS SINGLE HANDEDLY THE FUNNIEST AND CUTEST THING IVE EXPERIENCE. I hope he knows I'll be thinking about him a lot.

Also someone yelled out "THREE HUNDRED GEMS" after the aftershow and I thought that was a pretty good bit.

Entering spoiler category!!

They fucking killed Hatsune Miku. I literally cannot believe they straight up deleted her from the SEKAIs. They killed Hatsune goddamn Miku. That was CRAZY to me.

Broo... BROO THAT SCENE WHERE WONDER KAITO WAS HOLDING ONTO WONDER MIKU'S HAND AND THEY WERE PULLED APART FROM EACH OTHER, MIKU BEING CLAIMED BY THE DARK. BRO THAT SCENE GOT ME BADD

THE MOMENT SHE APPEARS BACK AND KAITO JUST LOOKS SAD AND GUILTY FOR LETTING GO. I LOVE THE WONDERLAND VS SO MUCH.

Also, everyone else boarding their SEKAI up and running from the corruption, but N25 just sat there and accepted it? That was metal as hell like it my god.

I will NEVERR forget how haunting it was to see Tsukasa stare horrified behind the camera as the 8pm fireworks went off behind him. That was SO TENSE.

AND THE SUDDEN SOUND AND MUSIC CUT OFF WHEN ICHIKA ENTERED THE RUINED SCHOOL SEKAI. GOD, THE ARTISTS NAILED IT.

Speaking of Tsukasa, I also find it really interesting how he first introduced Miku to Wondershow. The bit where he met Miku was played for laughs, but he was somber when he introduced them. Idk if I'm reading too much into it and it's just the continuation of the bit, but it seemed like Tsukasa had already heard Miku's dilema and was already somber when he brought her there. Idk, that kinda hurts to think about.

Overall, LOVEEEEED THIS MOVIE AND EVERYTHING SURROUNDING IT. It's so whimsy and cringey and such a love letter to the fans :(

[azurem]

"you've loved me for that long? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I did. Multiple times."

"Oh..."

JJDKDDKD that's so funny😭😭😭😭 I could see Ink being confused and Nightmare just. Yknow. -99 psychic damage.

However! For the dynamic I have for them this wouldn't make much sense outside of like. A gag. Mainly because I materialize Ink's denial not as ignorance but rather as a wish that everything was a lie. Like.

They'd know that whenever Nightmare tells them that he loves them he's being truthful. Like, they know in a visceral way. But they, in their heart, cannot accept this information as real. Nightmare's love isn't meant to be more than a box of text for him: he's still a character. Sure it's sweet and all but Ink feels that it shouldn't be much different than getting a random love confession event in a videogame. Nice and all but still not real.

Like. Ink would know that he is loved but the idea of letting himself be loved would be. Kind of undesirable. It'd just make his work harder. He can't love back as much (he can express favoritism, he can say Nightmare's his favorite character, but he can't accept the truth that Nightmare is someone he loves. He'd try so hard to limit his """base character liking""" as smth strictly hmmm character-real person bond only to hit the wall once he finally admits that it's not that type of thing anymore)

Like. For Ink is not a "catching hints" or a "belief" thing, but rather an internal thing because of the walls he placed in between himself and the "others".

So it'd be like hmmm

"I think I love you."

"...Ink, we're married."

"I know. Isn't that... just. Ah. I love you, Nightmare."

"...Ah."

Nightmare wouldn't suffer through this kind of drama cuz his period of suffering was explosive. Very painful but it was like. Very short in comparison to Ink's. He'd feel that the way Ink told him his Iloveyous has changed and would. Hm. Think about it sometimes.

[fairytales-and-folklore]

My Mind Turns Your Life Into Folklore (I Can't Dare To Dream About You Anymore)

The Owl House » Huntlow

featuring art by the lovely @the-leftover-rice [1] [2] ♥️

Title: My Mind Turns Your Life Into Folklore (I Can't Dare To Dream About You Anymore)

Author: fairytalesandfolklore

Fandom: The Owl House (Masterlist)

Relationship: Hunter | The Golden Guard x Willow Park

AO3 Rating: Teen & Up (a complete collection of author's notes, inspiration credits, content warnings and tags can be found on AO3)

Summary: The Golden Guard sees a glimpse into his future, his wife and children the spitting image of the pretty plant witch standing in front of him at this year's Covention, asking him to show her how to use a crystal ball.

She looks so familiar, but Hunter can't quite figure out where he knows her from, only that his future self is positively smitten — and honestly, it's not hard to see why. In the vision, she glances up at him, cheeks dimpling as she fixes him with a fond smile, and leans in to press a soft, sweet kiss against his lips that ignites a heat like a roaring fireplace inside his chest — both versions, current and future, affected. With a jolt, Hunter realizes why she looks so familiar — this woman, this absolute angel his future self adores with all his heart, is an older version of the witch currently standing in front of him, soft hands splayed over the edges of the crystal ball, dwarfed by his own clumsy, gloved hands wrapped around them. With a gasp, Hunter pulls back, thankful she can't see how utterly spellbound he looks beneath his mask.

Read On AO3 | Read On Tumblr:

As Golden Guard in training, it's Hunter's responsibility to ensure that all of the stands for this year's annual Covention are running smoothly — so imagine his frustration when he rounds the corner to patrol the wing dedicated to the main nine, and discovers that the Oracle stand has been completely deserted. 

Fear prickles up the length of his spine as he glances around wildly, searching for a sign of where they might have gone, when his gaze lands on a witch smiling brightly up at a poster advertising for the plant coven, and all thoughts of Belos and potential punishments fall right out of his head.

She looks to be around Hunter's age, if the Hexside uniform is anything to go by — green sleeves and leggings, indicating she's studying plant magic — with short dark hair tucked back behind her ears, and bright green eyes framed by a pair of round-rimmed glasses. Cute is the word his useless brain supplies him with, though he's not sure why that's a necessary observational detail. Hunter's tongue suddenly feels too big for his mouth, a rush of heat making the inside of his coven scout mask almost stifling.

"Excuse me," he says, frowning when his voice cracks. "Would you happen to know where the attendant for this stand has gone?"

The plant witch turns to look at him, blinking at him in surprise, as though she's not used to being noticed, before turning to glance in the direction of the empty stand.

"I think I heard them say something about food poisoning before they rushed off to the bathroom," she says with a small shrug, her voice sweet and raspy in a way that makes Hunter's heart do a funny little somersault inside his chest.

"Though you'd think, given their focus, they'd have known not to eat the spider-crab cakes," she jokes, and Hunter surprises himself by huffing out a laugh.

"Well then, as the official guard of this Covention, it's my job to ensure you get the full experience," he says, puffing out his chest in an effort to appear confident and impressive. The plant witch smiles at him, and Hunter's face heats another ten degrees.

"So, oracle magic," he blunders on. "I— admittedly don't know much about it, but I think it involves crystal balls?"

Hunter glances down at the object in question, sitting in the middle of the table between them, dark purple mist swirling inside it like a slow motion cyclone.

"I think you have to be touching it," she says, taking a tentative step forward and reaching out to place her hands on either side of it at the exact same moment that Hunter does, fingertips accidentally brushing against one another's.

All at once, a vision unfurls inside Hunter's mind, clear as if it were a memory — an image of himself, maybe ten, fifteen years in the future. He's curled up on a couch in the middle of a cozy little living room bathed in soft earthy hues of green and gold, an exotic collection of potted plants covering nearly every available surface, hanging plants suspended from the ceiling like verdant chandeliers, reading aloud from a storybook to a little girl that's snuggled up beside him.

The girl, who couldn't be more than four or five years old, has light blonde hair pulled back into two short braids, freckles scattered across her chubby, sun-kissed cheeks, and a pair of big, round-rimmed glasses perched on the bridge of her button nose. She's giggling, asking him to do funny voices, calling him papa. His future self happily obliges, reading out the next passage in a deep, booming scary monster voice that has the little girl roaring with laughter, beaming up at him with that same gap-toothed smile Hunter sports now.

Just then, a figure appears in the doorframe leading from the living room to the kitchen — a woman close to his age, with bright green eyes and a kind smile, spitting image of the little girl nestled in his arms, only with much darker hair — a soft shade of black that ignites in hues of midnight blue and forest green as she passes by the sunlit bay window. Tucked into her side is a baby boy with a fluffy mop of that same soft black hair, Hunter's signature forelock dangling between a pair of dark red eyes identical to his own.

The woman strolls over to the couch and settles in next to him, curling up under his other arm. She looks so familiar, but Hunter can't quite figure out where he knows her from, only that his future self is positively smitten — and honestly, it's not hard to see why. She glances up at him, cheeks dimpling as she fixes him with a fond smile, and leans in to press a soft, sweet kiss against his lips that ignites a heat like a roaring fireplace inside his chest — both versions, current and future, affected. 

With a jolt, Hunter realizes why she looks so familiar — this woman, this absolute angel his future self adores with all his heart, is an older version of the witch currently standing in front of him, soft hands splayed over the edges of the crystal ball, dwarfed by his own clumsy, gloved hands wrapped around them. With a gasp, Hunter pulls back, thankful she can't see how utterly spellbound he looks beneath his mask. 

"Whoah, that was so cool!" she exclaims. "I think I just did oracle magic!"

"What, uh…what did you see?" Hunter asks, trying his damnedest to sound politely interested, in spite of the desperate curiosity that has his heart threatening to beat right out of his chest.

"Well, it was a little blurry, so it was kind of hard to make out, but I think I might have just gotten a sneak peek at my future family!" she says happily, bright green eyes sparkling behind her black-rimmed glasses (huh, Hunter muses, in the future, they're gold.)

"I was in the kitchen, holding this adorable little baby boy in my arms, when I walked into the living room and saw a man curled up on the couch, reading a book of fairytales to a little girl I kind of just instinctively knew was my daughter. I can't explain how I knew they were my family, it was just this intrinsic feeling, you know?" she asks, and yes, Hunter thinks, swallowing thickly, he knows exactly what she means.

"I couldn't really see his face, but from what I can tell, my future spouse is a looker — tall, fit, same adorable fluffy blond hair as the little girl," she giggles, and oh, there's that funny flipping sensation in the pit of his stomach again. 

"It looked so nice. I can't wait to meet him someday," the plant witch — Willow, his brain supplies, a detail plucked from the future vision — exhales on an idyllic sigh, and Hunter forgets how to breathe.

"So do you think you'll consider a future in oracle magic?" he asks, trying desperately to keep his voice from shaking.

"Nah. Cool as that was — if it was even real — I think I'll stick to plants," Willow says with a cheerful shrug. "Thanks for the demo, though! I've gotta go catch up with my friends, but it was nice meeting you…"

"Hunter," he says without hesitation, and then wonders why he'd just given out something so personal to someone he barely knows.

"Hunter," she says, and warmth like a roaring fireplace spreads throughout his entire chest. "I'm Willow."

Willow.

"It was nice to meet you. Thanks again!" she calls over her shoulder, waving goodbye as she rounds the corner, headed in the direction of the auditorium. 

Hunter stares after her for what feels like hours, unable to shake himself out of his trance. His entire being has been shaken to the core. He'd seen everything so vividly, felt everything so potently. His future self was happy, so blissfully happy. Tired, but a good, satisfied kind of tired, and far less so than the kind of thankless exhaustion he feels now on a regular basis. It terrifies him how desperately he wants that future, how much he already wants her. Willow. The plant witch. His future wi—

Hunter's smile falters, giddy anticipation ripped out of him like cannon fire through the hull of a ship. Because the reality of it is that he can't. He can't want that. Hunter's future was already sealed long before he met her. He's dedicated his life to serving the Coven, serving Belos. The Titan has big plans for him. He can't let anything get in the way of that. It doesn't matter what he wants.

Later that evening, Hunter visits the head of the potions coven, and asks for an elixir to make him forget what he saw today. As he lays in bed, potion in hand, he thinks about her one last time — her bright green eyes, her kind smile, the sound of her laughter, the way she'd made him laugh so easily — with a bitter pang, Hunter realizes just how much of a rarity that is.

He doesn't even know her, but already adores her, in love with the potential of their future together, the life they've built together, their little family. A nice, happy, normal life. Something he can never have, bound as he is to the Emperor's Coven. He's not allowed to want anything else, nor should he. It's an honor to be granted the coveted title of the Golden Guard, to be chosen as the Emperor's right-hand man.

…isn't it?

Before he can change his mind, Hunter downs the potion in one grimacing swig, falls asleep, and forgets.

• • •

One year later, he's sitting in the cafeteria at Hexside, brand new schedule folded up under a stack of second-hand textbooks as he stares a hard line into the crystal ball propped up on the table in front of him. Hard as he tries, he can't seem to make anything appear in the swirling purple mist, and he's this close to dropping Intro To Oracle Magic when Willow walks in, takes the seat opposite him, and asks him what he's up to.

Hunter glances up at her, heart catching in his throat as she levels him with a smile, a soft pink hue blossoming in her dimpled cheeks, finger twirling around a lock of hair that's come loose from one of her braids. Cute, his stupid brain supplies, and feels his face grow hot, urgently telling it to shut up.

He's known the Captain for several months now, would've thought he'd eventually become immune to the special brand of heart-racing, heat-rousing, brain-fogging madness she stirs within him, but it only seems to worsen the more time he spends in her company. 

Once he's remembered how words work again, he tells her that, now that the coven system has officially been disbanded, and it's no longer illegal to study wild magic, he's decided he wants to study a little bit of everything, colorful Hexside uniform matching his honorary little sister Luz's — only, he can't seem to figure out how to get his crystal ball to show him anything.

"I think you have to be touching it," Willow says, and then immediately frowns, trying to figure out why this exchange feels so familiar. 

Hunter understands. He can feel it, too. Like déjà vu.

Willow shakes her head as if to clear it.

"Here, I'll show you," she offers, holding out her hands for Hunter to take. "We can do it together."

• • •

Twelve years later, Hunter is in his living room (though with the sheer amount of plants lined from wall to ceiling, it's really more like an indoor garden, he muses fondly) chasing around a little girl with light blonde hair pulled back into two short braids, sunlight glinting off the frames of her gold-rimmed glasses, the space between her two front teeth prominent as she shrieks and giggles in her efforts to evade capture.

"Gotcha," he says, scooping his daughter up into his arms and settling her back down onto the couch, adjusting Winter's glasses so that they're perched just so on the bridge of her freckled nose, before turning to the last-read page of her favorite storybook, a birthday present from her Uncle Gus.

He's in the middle of doing his best scary monster voice — a skill he picked up watching Auntie Luz and Amity read to her cousin Azura — when Willow strolls into the living room, greeting him with a kiss as she settles onto the couch beside them, little Caleb softly dozing in her arms.

[amerricanartwork]

So, I'm looking at your arti and gourmand art (absolutely fucken love the two, you draw them so adorable) and I got hit with an Intrusive Thought that I simply must share:

...

Arti bench pressing Gourm

Firstly, glad you enjoy my Artimand content! I just think they'd make such a funny yet sweet couple, and I love drawing them!

And now I'll address that thought to actually explain a little headcanon I just so happened to be pondering recently along that subject!

It's on the subject of where Arti's greater strength comes from. See, unlike other designs that show Arti as being bigger and seemingly more muscular than the average slugcat, I actually like to imagine her as a little smaller than average (about 2'10", to be exact; average is 3ft.), for both more humor and narrative significance. However, this begs the question of why she's the only slugcat who can dislodge regular spears, which implies she's stronger than average too?

Well, my conclusion was that it was a combination of adrenaline-based strength with the fact, by the time her campaign occurs, she's been in and still remains in very frequent intense combat scenarios, so she gets far more opportunity to train her muscles than even regular carnivorous slugcats. It's especially so if her needing to carry around scavenger corpses to pass through Karma gates is canon and not just a game mechanic.

However, if that were the case it would also mean this extra strength would only exist before she gets with Gourmand. Afterwards, I imagine she loses much of it and reverts to more Hunter levels of strength due to 1. no longer being constantly filled with pure fiery rage and an almost instinctive urge for vengeance, 2. being in a much safer environment where she no longer has to fight troupes of scavs every cycle (I imagine she over time reconciles with them too, but that's something for later), and 3. much of her lost muscle at the time of meeting Gourm being replaced by fat as his eating habits awaken her own bigger appetite.

So long story short, given the big size and weight difference, she might have been able to lift Gourm before becoming his mate if she were that angry and determined enough. But unfortunately, there's no chance of her bench-pressing him after she settles in with him. And I'm sure she'd be at least a little mad about it, too.

But, of course, Gourm still loves her regardless!

[mitskicodedwukong]

🍭 SWEET TOOTH 🍭 || Macaque x Reader

» sweet tooth (cavetown) « 0:45 ─〇───── 4:07

╔⏤⏤⏤⏤╝🍑╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗ AUTHOR'S NOTE ╚⏤⏤⏤⏤╗🍑╔⏤⏤⏤╝ ➤ This is reposted from my old account, @nothyenlowz :3 ➤ This is a oneshot. ➤ This is romantic. ➤ Reader uses she/her and is a cat demon, so she has cat-like features/behaviors! ➤ Described the clothes but tried to keep it simple/vague so ppl could add more details if they'd like! ➤ I wrote this quite a while ago and I think I picked foods sort of randomly (I looked up dinner foods I think lol) so if you're reading this and you're like wtf is this dinner... I'm so sorry </3 ➤ I kinda lost the plot a few times I think,, and I got super into the shadow story,, hope this is good!! Also sorry if I switched tenses at some point, it happens rip. Also also if the kiss scene is bad I'm so sorry, I'm awkward asf LMAO. ➤ TRIGGER WARNINGS include use of "name" (couldn't avoid it, sorry </3), profanity, a little bit of angst, referenced toxicity, and referenced murder. ➤ Word count: 3,451

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

❝ A sweet tooth for you, I'm wide awake .❞

Your tail vibrates excitedly as the timer goes off, alerting you that the mango pudding is done chilling. Grinning widely, you almost run to your fridge, throwing open the door and crouching to pull the cooled dessert out. You take a deep whiff as you wander back to the counter, shutting the fridge door with a bump of your hip. It smells heavenly, and an experimental shake of the pan leads you to believe the sweet treat has successfully set.

You set down the pudding and turn to the dishes, rinsing them in the sink and leaving them in the basin to be properly washed later. As you scratch a particularly stubborn splash of dried pudding from the whisk, you look over at your oven, squinting to read the numbers displayed.

5:47.

"Ah, shit," you hiss under your breath, finishing up with the whisk and nearly tossing it into the basin.

I'm going to be late! you fret as you pull off your apron, throwing it upon the counter as you rush to your bedroom to pull on your outfit: a simple white turtleneck over a soft long-sleeve and high-waisted pants, complemented with long socks and short, buckled heels. Once you finish with your outfit and additional accessories, you grab a basket on your way out of your room and quickly fill it with cutlery, cubed mangoes, sugar, and of course, the pudding.

You pause for a second, ears flicking about as you try to make sure you haven't forgotten anything. Your time is cut short as another alarm sings out on your phone.

You squeak, shoving your phone into your pocket and spinning on your heel as you race out of your home, narrowly keeping the basket from slapping against your side.

──────────────

You're fairly certain the only reason Macaque doesn't snap at you slamming the dojo doors is because he heard you coming.

He's curled up on his couch, a hefty book in his lap—probably about something medicinal or historical if you had to guess. Your eyes flicker to his face, scowling as you see his signature smirk, golden-brown eyes scanning your hunched-over figure in amusement.

"Look what the cat dragged in," purrs the demon.

"You—hah—think you're soooo funny," you grit out, shuffling to the couch with a glare.

"When aren't I?" Macaque asks.

The monkey slaps his tail across your face before you can recite the "a" portion of your alphabetized list.

"How come you're so late today?" he teases. "Normally you're here before I am."

You roll your eyes and give a half-hearted bite to the demon's tail, barely grazing the fur, but he pulls it away with a narrowed gaze anyway. You give him a dramatically sweet face, fluttering your lashes as you set your basket on the table.

You make a lazy gesture at it. "I made something for us."

"Oh?" Macaque asks, cocking an eyebrow. "How romantic, starlight."

For a split second, you consider letting your embarrassment at the implication get to you. But then you decide if Macaque wants to be a little evil, you may as well join him.

"Only the best for you, moonflower," you coo back, revelling in the way the black-furred monkey's face heats up around his spiked mask. You immediately laugh at his blush, far more elated at your ability to fluster the stoic demon than you think is normal, adoring the way his ears wiggle as though trying to hide his face.

"Laugh it up, kitty," he grumbles, reaching out for the basket.

You lunge forward and smack his hand before his claw tips so much as brush the handles. "Nu-uh! That's for after dinner, loser."

Macaque frowns and squints at you, shaking his hand and blowing on it dramatically. "What are you, five?"

"Out of five~!" You sing-song, scooping up the basket as you jump to your feet. "Now get cooking, Macaroni."

──────────────

When Macaque announces the food's almost done, you decide to raid his wardrobe for pajamas.

You zoom up the stairs before he can say a word, but to your surprise, he doesn't make so much as a sigh as your thundering footsteps fade into his room.

It's weird. Normally Macaque always whines about you snagging his clothes, complaining about the pastry stains or endless amounts of cat hair that ends up on them—which is a small price to pay when you're constantly making him yummy treats!—but tonight he's oddly quiet.

Come to think of it... he's been acting off for a while.

You noticed it last month. Your time spent with the monkey had turned more... hm, physical. He seemed to have a sudden interest in training, teaching you how to make certain foods, dancing, even cuddling, interestingly enough. And amongst his standard sarcasm and snark, he was complimenting you a lot more, too. You'd even started finding little trinkets around your house! So unless someone else with a penchant for purple aesthetics was breaking into your house to leave you jewelry and pretty flowers, it had to be Macaque.

But simultaneously, Macaque seemed to be... distancing himself. A canceled plan here and there, an excuse to leave the room every now and then, a strange new sense of secrecy within the demon, as though he was guarding something from you—like he was afraid of you coming too close all over again.

It was so confusing. If you allowed yourself to consider the possibility that the demon had fallen for you of all people, what were you supposed to make of his behavior? That he found the notion of liking you silly, or maybe he hated it, and he was torn between making a game of it or completely pushing you away?

The thought strikes you right in the chest, your bottom lip falling victim to your sharp teeth.

Just recently you'd come to terms with just how much you really like the monkey—how much you love the sound of his voice and the way he drags you into trouble and his devotedness to you as a friend. It'd been an catastrophic realization, really, one that left you tossing and turning in bed and damn near ripping your fur out.

How could you be blamed? Macaque was hardened like stone in the aftermath of his past, making him closed-off and apathetic; a "lone wolf" in spite of his nature. It'd taken so, so much time and patience to get to where you two were now, laughing and poking fun at each other in his dojo, his safe space.

The last thing you want is to lose everything because your silly heart loves tragedies.

"Starlight!" Macaque's sharp call comes from downstairs, making you jump. "The hell are you doing? I said dinner's done!"

"Ack—I'm coming, just a minute!"

You quickly throw on a loose shirt and shorts, struggling a bit with the hole for your tail before finally settling the limb and bounding out of the room. Immediately, an aroma of deliciousness hits your nose. You almost stumble down the stairs due to the distraction, righting yourself with an embarrassed flush (boy, are you glad Macaque didn't see that) and carefully making your way into the kitchen.

Your eyes widen at what you see. A large bowl of chǎofàn sits at the table, neighbored by a plate of tángcù lǐjǐ and another of xiǎolóngbāo. The scent is divine, and you would call the meal a gift from Buddha if it weren't for the smirking demon leaning against the counter.

"Like what you see?" he asks cockily, tail sweeping against the ground in a lazy sway.

"No way you just made all of this!" you exclaim, grinning.

"Maybe I'm just that good," replies the black-furred monkey with a wink, fetching two plates and some silverware out of various cupboards and drawers.

"Not that good," you snort, grabbing your basket from the fridge. "Come on, what's the trick this time, moonflower?"

The demon falls strangely silent at your question. You raise an eyebrow at his back, waiting for a response. Finally, in an uncharacteristically small voice, Macaque says, "I've been preparing."

There's more to it. There's definitely more to it, but you'll be merciful and not push any further.

You set the basket down on the floor and take the plate held out to you, happily filling it up before moving to your seat. Macaque joins you on the opposite side, silent save for the short scraping sound of silverware against glass. The uncomfortable silence threatens to spoil your appetite, and you spend a few quiet minutes praying that the demon across from you will say something.

"Is it good?"

Thank Buddha, you think, immediately put at ease to hear his voice.

"Duh," you say, swallowing another forkful of delicious food. "Your cooking is some of the best I've ever had."

"Oh really?" Macaque leans forward on his elbows, hands laced under his chin, and you feel your face warm ever-so-slightly. "Then where do I rank, starlight?"

"Top ten at least," you tease, reaching for more chǎofàn. Macaque unlaces a hand to pick up the bowl and pass it to you.

"At least," he chuckles. "Well, eat up. I have a play to put on."

"A play?" You repeat, cheeks round with rice.

Macaque nods. "Yes." Quickly, he adds, "for you."

You very nearly make a quip about the romance of dinner and a show, but seeing his tail tense and thud against the floor makes you reconsider.

Instead, you smile. "I'll be there."

The monkey snorts. "Where else would you be?" Then, "if you stand me up for rice and chicken, I'll never make it again."

You fake an angry grumble. "Don't you have to go prepare, smart guy?"

He blinks. Once. Twice.

"Oh," he says, simply at first. Then his eyes widen. "Oh, yes! I have to—there are things I have to—I'm going now." Macaque cuts his rambling short and just barely avoids sprinting out of the kitchen like his tail is on fire.

"Don't—" you cringe at the sound of something falling, followed by a quiet yelp. "—hurt yourself on the way out..."

──────────────

You sit amongst soft blankets and pillows, tails curled around your knees as you wait for the play to start. The light of Macaque's lantern bathes the dojo in a violet hue, shadows dancing with the sway of it as Macaque gets into position. The monkey's innate shadow powers and connection to the artifact make it easy to manipulate it and the dark for his purposes, so part of you is confused that Macaque settles himself so far away from you. You reason that maybe the demon's just feeling extra dramatic for this story.

Or maybe this is it, you think.

You don't know what that means—your stomach twists all the same.

"Welcome viewer, to a shadow play the likes of which have never been seen."

You smile at the signature opening line, a soft purr rumbling in your throat as you listen closely, ears perked in Macaque's direction.

"Here we follow another tale about the tragic Warrior." Macaque's voice reverberates around you, and you watch as a simplified silhouette of hi—ahem, "the Warrior" manifests from the shadows. "Though this story is unlike the others—for instead of our Warrior bearing yet another arduous chapter of life, perhaps he has found his happy end.

"Everyone knows the tale of how the Sun came to betray the Moon. But what very few have to come to learn is that it was the Moon that brought on such a tragedy. You see, many centuries ago, the Moon could only see their dark side—blemished, indecipherable, and lacking in light. So often the moon thought of their dark side and wept, believing that if it was all they saw, it was all anyone could see. And then the Moon realized something. They were the Sun's only companion, their only friend, so surely, surely, the Sun would give their light to them.

"And at first, the Sun did everything they could to show the Moon just how bright they could be. The Sun taught the Moon everything they knew, and the Moon took that knowledge and taught it to others, becoming a beloved warrior. And when the Moon became the Warrior, they changed the Sun into a Hero—a well-shaped, perfect vessel of holiness and goodness.

"The Sun allowed this because they loved the Warrior, so they locked themselves within the Hero. And while the Warrior loved the Hero very much, they were so blinded by love for their light that they didn't see what they were doing to their beloved Sun.

"Years passed and the Warrior had taken almost every bit of sunlight. Only their heart and a small sliver remained, which the Sun branded on to the Hero's golden cudgel and hid beneath stone so the Warrior could not find it. This angered the Warrior, who still could not see what they'd done to the Sun, for they were so hidden within the Hero. He said, "my Hero! Why do you hide your light from me? Is it not mine, too? Have I not helped you shine?"

"The Hero replied, "I hide nothing from you, my Warrior, certainly not our light. I simply have no more to give you."

"The Warrior was displeased, and this displeasure, coupled with the dimming Sun, poisoned their light until nothing remained but a thin halo around the two of them.

"This terrified the Warrior—to see that they were so close to becoming the Moon again, so close to being consumed by their dark side, that they demanded the Hero give them their heart. Only this time, the Hero refused.

""You are not a hero," spat the Warrior. "And you are no longer a warrior," whispered the Hero. The Warrior was very angry, so they attempted to swallow the Sun itself. They peeled away the Hero's stone body to reveal the blazing heart beneath, fully intent to rob them of every last bit of light they had, even if it meant they'd never shine again.

"The Sun broke free of the Hero's perfect body, and, using the light on the golden cudgel, banished the Warrior to a place of no light. No stars. No song. Only darkness.

"A place where the Moon could no longer hide."

While you've never heard the story portrayed this way, you find it heartbreakingly easy to tell he's talking about his death and descent into Diyu. You fiddle with your hands, pressing on the paw pads as you stare, watching the Warrior turn into wisps as a glowing mass of shadows (the Sun?) form into a tendril and strikes them.

It's almost too much to watch, your brain caught up in what preceded Macaque's death. Is this why he's been so nervous? It would make sense—this version of the tale makes him vulnerable to say the least, and it's oozing with painful, regretful honesty. The truth has never been easy for him, so you can't imagine the strength it's taking him to preform this.

The scene changes, shifting in a quick montage.

"For centuries, the Moon rotted in their anger and sorrow. So angry were they that they allowed themselves to be hung from strings like a simple puppet, used as a weapon to harm undeserving victims."

Flashes of burned and otherwise destroyed villages wrap around the dojo, all with a chained Macaque hovering above, eyes burning. The last image you recognize as the Monkie Kid and his group. A shadowy tendril wraps around the kid's limbs, attached to him in a similar way to Macaque's chains. Your stomach twists.

"Even when the Moon finally relinquished their fury and reconciled with the Sun, they still could not find it in them to shine. They'd ruined the Warrior many years ago, and they still couldn't believe the Moon would be any good.

"...or so they thought. One day, the Moon came across a maiden. She was gentle and wild; unapologetic, unwavering, and bold. She was a mountain who stood unblinking before the weight of the Moon's darkness.

"The Moon thought they were doomed to break her, as they so often did to strong things. But then the Maiden produced a mooncake from her robes, split it in half, and said, "Would you share this treat with me, pretty Moon?""

A feminine silhouette appears before the Warrior, dressed in a flowing hanfu and flowers. Most interestingly, the Maiden has tufted ears and a long, fluffy tail just like—

Your face erupts in a shocked blush as understanding dawns on you.

The first time you met Macaque, you'd been out selling mooncakes. It'd been a good day, and by the end you had a single treat left, which you fully intended to scarf down while watching the sun set. But then you'd seen him, leaning against a bridge and watching the reflection of the sun in the river, and he just looked so sad, you thought a mooncake would add a little brightness to his face.

A pity cake it might have been, but you think it was one of the best pity cakes you've ever dolled out.

"The Moon took the Maiden's gift. Together, the two ate at their cakes until they were naught but crumbs and the sun had long set. Before they parted, the Maiden smiled at the Moon.

"And the Moon glowed.

"The Moon glowed so bright that moonlight showed through the craters in their skin, that the stars came down to twinkle in their fur and the sweetest dreams whispered in their ears. For once, the Moon was something shining, something bright, and at last they understood: they had needed someone to glow for, not because of.

"For weeks, the Moon and the Maiden continued to meet. The Moon continued to glow, feeling more and more like the great warrior they once were. But what is a warrior without a home to return to?

The shadows merge into a single ball, gliding towards you and settling before you. The ball reforms, revealing Macaque kneeling in front of you, your hands held gently in his. But what really catches your eye is his glamour—or lack thereof. His six ears, the reason for his namesake, unfurl from his head like flower petals, glowing with shades of blue, pink, and purple that illuminate both of your faces. His fur lengths, shaggy and a little rough-looking; a white halo of fur surrounds his face, shimmering in the soft light.

His eye, blind though it may be, is milky and spotted like the bright side of the moon and you can't help but think it's the most gorgeous thing you've ever seen.

"And now to discover how this story ends," he says softly.

"Macaque—" you begin, only to fall silent when he squeezes your hands.

"I know I'm not a hero," Macaque says. "I think I might always be a little... bad—a trickster, a bit of a thief, a bully every now and then; a shadow of something good. But you make me feel... real. Like I can be something more, something people can love without getting hurt, and I haven't felt that in a long, long time, starlight."

You blink, feeling something wet tease the corner of your eyes. Your heart thumps in your chest, tail unfurling from your knees and reaching out. Macaque meets it halfway and they curl around each other like ribbons.

"I love you," Macaque whispers. Louder, he says it again, and you shiver when he says your name. "I love you, and if you'll have me, I'll be yours for as long as you want me."

Your mouth feels dry, your body nearly numb with—what, shock? Excitement? Happiness? Exhaustion because you're feeling all the things?

Probably.

But still, your heart swells at the confession and your hands slip from his to cradle his face and you say, "I love you too, Macaque."

Macaque grins, eyes shining wetly. His hands go to your cheeks, thumbs brushing under your eyes. His ears flap against your hands for a second, and then he whispers, "can I kiss you?"

Your heart nearly explodes. But you give nothing away as you utter a soft, "yes."

You're not quite sure what to expect when his lips meet yours. Fireworks, or maybe like a puzzle piece is shifting into place. You think you can safely say you feel neither, but you do feel both of your growing smiles, until you're pulling away to laugh and Macaque follows suit.

When your giggles die down, you pet the demon's ears again. "You wanna have dessert now?"

The black-furred monkey huffs, leaning into your touch. "In a minute," he murmurs, and then he's bringing you back to his lips.

❝ I like you—say it back .❞

[cdragons]

You lived on the Cut, but you knew your situation was far better than most of your friends.

While you were by no means a Kook, your family had enough money to be comfortable. Sure, it wasn't a beach mansion with 10 bedrooms, 8 baths, and a decked-out pool - but it was more than enough.

Your parents had full-time jobs that paid the bills, put food on the table, and gave you a roof over your head. Most importantly, they could comfortably afford Costco executive memberships for both.

At first, they were skeptical about paying so much for a membership fee, but when they saw the annual 2% rewards on qualified Costco purchases - they were sold.

The only Costco on the island was in Kitty Hawk, which was about a 15-minute drive without traffic. Because of your parents' schedules, the only times they had time were on the weekends. They always took you with them, of course. Weekends were the best part of the week, not because you got out of school but because you got to go to Costco.

Your parents made it so fun, too! Costco was your own little amusement park - your parents let you ride in the shopping cart as you waved to fellow shoppers, your family tried each and every sample cart dispersed throughout the store, and you got to have a giant slice of pizza and soda from the food court!

Not only that, but the people at the exit would always draw a balloon on the receipt after they checked the cart!

The moment you were able to get your driver's license, you wanted to get a membership, too. You paid for it with the money you saved up from years of babysitting, working at the Kook Country Club, and even helping out with the Wreck.

You loved the store so much. Even when the Pogues would ask you to join them on the weekends, you told them you couldn't go because you had to go shopping with your parents.

Finally, JJ (your amazingly sweet, sexy, funny, wonderful boyfriend who you had a crush on since the sixth grade) wanted to find out what was so dang special about this "eXCluSivE" warehouse store that it meant he had to be kept away from his (out-of-his-league, gorgeous, smart, sunshine smiles) girl (who he's been in love with since the third grade).

Luckily, your dad had a job that was gonna take up the entire weekend. Your mom and you could have gone, but your dad was the heavy lifter of the family - you two needed him for the real heavy stuff.

That's where JJ comes in!

You and JJ were lying on the hammock the afternoon before the trip when you asked him if he could join you and your mom to Costco because they needed help loading stuff into the house afterward.

"It's nothing too crazy, but mom's been getting a lot of night shifts lately, and I don't want her to strain herself more than she already has to. I'll treat you to whatever you want at the food court!" What kind of heartless monster would JJ have to be to refuse? God, he wanted to smush your cheeks between his palms and kiss every part of your face from then till the rapture. Besides, your folks have been so good to him since he was a tot. Which is pretty much exactly what he did. "Don't worry, pretty mama; papa J'll get it done."

...Listen, he still thinks it's weird your parents fork over so much money just to shop at this one store when there's a perfectly good Bobby Heyward on the Cut. Buuuuut, he'll go along with anything you do if it means he gets to see that 1000-megawatt smile you shine his way.

The next day, you and your mom pick JJ from the Chateau, and JJ's never seen you so excited, ever. You're practically hopping like a little bunny, and he would've pulled you onto his lap if your mom wasn't there.

"I can't wait for you to see it! You're going to love it! Everyone's so nice, and the food there is so cheap, you'll never want to leave." JJ couldn't help but affectionately roll his eyes at your excitement. Anyone else, he'd think they'd lost their marbles or hit their joint too much - but for you, it was nothing short of adorable. "Baby," he kissed your cheek. "S'just a store - ain't gonna be Disney."

...He was wrong...he was sooooo wrong. JJ's jaw fucking dropped at the sight of the massive warehouse since your mom pulled into the parking lot, all the way to when they entered the store when she pulled out her card for security to check.

You had to physically shut his mouth out of fear he'd eat a bug.

JJ was starin' at everything like he was at Disney, and he really might as well have been. He begged your mom if it was alright if they could walk in every aisle to see it all. Your mom raised a brow before seeing the absolutely adoring expression you had on your boyfriend.

How could you help yourself? He looked so cute, all excited!

She agreed, and immediately, JJ went to the electronics sections and plopped down at the TV with the biggest screen and the best graphics he'd ever seen. From there, he found the section in the beginning where the coupon and sale items were located and immediately gunned for the discount toothpaste and razors.

"Baby! They give you a pack of 30 here! "...I don't think your peach fuzz counts. And do you even brush your teeth every day?" "Uh, 'scuse me - I will for these prices. And don't think I don't know how many of these bad boys you n' Kie go through each month. Your cooch will never be growing out of its jungle with these bad boys."

The food and household sections are his own damn paradise. He tries every sample and goes back for more, and the workers treat him like he's a freaking golden retriever puppy.

"Babe, babe, babe - this place gives you two loaves for ONE SET! ONE SET! LOOK AT THE CAKES AND MUFFINS! Oh shi- we need to bring Pope. He'll lose his rocks for this."

Sees the prices for the Kirkland products and immediately insists that anything else is "boUgIE."

"5 BUCKS FOR A PACK OF 40?!" "It's 3.99 if you're a member."

Immediately goes and loads two packs into the cart. You warn him not to let Kie know that you and your family voluntarily bought plastic water bottles - he does not care.

"(Y/N), she can crucify me upside down n' shit; we're not missing out on this deal."

He sees the $5 rotisserie chickens and physically stops the cart. You slam into his back and barely have enough time to grab onto his shirt to stop him from getting another cart and filling it up with chickens.

"We don't need so many chickens!" "THINK OF ALL THE STUFF YOU CAN MAKE!" "We'll get one for you for now and come back another time!" "But-" "I'll even let you sit in the cart!"

Finally, you and your mom got everything from the shopping list (along with a few other things upon JJ's request), and you three could finally head out for the checkout.

Just when JJ thought he couldn't love Costco more, he finally saw his heaven...the Costco food court.

$2 slices of pizza...$1.50 for a hot dog, and a free refill soda combo...$3 smoothies...$2 soft serves...$9.95 18-INCH PEPPERONI PIZZAS????

...Fuck the Wreck, this was officially the best restaurant on the whole fucking island.

Your mom gives the green light for you and him to get a table, and JJ practically jumps on the first empty table (there were still grease stains and ketchup spills from the previous seaters) and sets his stuff down. His giant 6' body is leaning over smaller frame as he watches you press the buttons on the order kiosk.

"Two hot dogs...one pepperoni - no, make that two - no, three - fuck it, get the whole pie...holy shit, they got churros?!"

After you pay and grab the receipt, you two wait by the window for your food as JJ is buzzing with the biggest smile you've seen on him since you two got together. A couple of onlookers are staring at the two of you - some with skeptical expressions, others warmly chuckling at his excitement.

When your number is called, the mountain of food you ordered requires only the most delicate and careful balancing acts for you two to get back to the table where your mom was. Thankfully, she cleaned the table and got the napkins before you all sat down. She volunteered to fill the sodas - Coke for you and her, Mountain Dew for JJ.

The noises he makes while eating are borderline pornographic and make everyone around your immediate vicinity uncomfortable. Parents, grandmas, kids, and employees are giving your table the BIGGEST side eyes; meanwhile, you're just eatin' your pizza and sippin' your soda with the straightest poker face. Occasionally, you turn around and stare at your blonde menace with the most lovestruck expression in the history of ever, and you're just so happy to be the one to give him this experience.

While he's on the john, you snuck away and bought the prettiest bouquet you found in your price range. Afterward, you went back to the food court kiosk and sorted a chocolate soft-serve cup just for him! The look of pure, unadulterated adoration on his face when you gave him the bouquet alone made you wanna cry tears of joy, and when you showed him the ice cream cup - he immediately picked you up and spun you in a circle with everyone watching.

Your mom was 100% recording the whole thing and sent it to your dad.

At the exit, you asked if the lady could draw a balloon. She looked over, confused before she saw your golden retriever puppy of a boyfriend and even drew a smiley face on the balloon. It goes without saying JJ keeps the receipt in his wallet.

Literally the happiest person on the Cut, he's skippin' everywhere, all day. Nothing can bring him down, not even the fucking high prices Mike Carerra charges for one fucking drink at the Wreck.

Keeps the receipt so he can brag about how much your family saved to the other Pogues. John B and Pope do not believe him until they scroll through all dozens of pictures in JJ's camera roll of every glorious thing he saw at Costco.

...They beg you to include them next time.

This is for all the JJ girlies who want some fluff! Let me know in the comments what you think, and reblog if you enjoyed reading it and want more!

Tagging: @ethereal-athalia, @dipperscavern, @instructionsnotincluded, @darlingchronicles, @ruerecs, @excbambi , @jjsfavgirl , @bre99 , @redhead1180, @markno

[b4mpyre-k1zz3s]

hiii :D could you please do jackass guys x fem goth reader headcannons (if you haven't already)

like if they'd think its cool, would they be into the music, politics and style of it, ect.

thanks sm + happy halloween 🖤

Jackass Guys X Goth!Y/N

Johnny Knoxville X Fem!Y/N, Bam Margera X Fem!Y/N, Steve-O X Fem!Y/N, Chris Pontius X Fem!Y/N

Warnings: Suggestive content

An: You have NO CLUE how long I have been waiting to get this ask!!! I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it here, but I am a massive fan of goth music (though I don’t really dress the part), and as such have a decent catalogue of knowledge on this subject!! I would be overjoyed to write for Goth!Y/N if there’s anything else you would like to see :)

Johnny

Literally the definition of confused but supportive.

After he checked our a few bands you liked, he was left with more questions than answers,

“Are you alright? I mean, if you need somebody t’talk to, I’m here!”

Despite needing to be assured that yes, you were fine, Johnny has his own experience with counterculture, notably the punk scene (he was responsible for the Ramones and the X-Ray Specs getting on the soundtrack for the TV series!)

So he would more connect with you on an ideological perspective than on mere aesthetic!

You can expect a lot of couples trips to thrift stores, with Knoxville eagerly helping you look for things you could alter.

Holding up this floral, grandma skirt he found buried in a rack, your boyfriend inspected the garment,

“Y’know, I bet this’d look really sharp in black…”

If you do trad makeup, you best believe this mf is going to to Halloween stores Nov 1st to get you ARMFULLS of white foundation

The clerk at the counter recognized him and asked if he was going to use it for some stunt, to which he replied with an adoring smile,

“This is for my girl! Real sweet- she does this makeup stuff like you wouldn’t believe…”

Bam

You cannot tell me this mf wouldn’t live for dating a goth girl!

Bam would definitely be into whatever music you listened to, but more so the more metal/industrial side of the goth scene.

He already listened to stuff like the 69 Eyes and Cradle of Filth before you met,

So, given how similar your tastes were, he was kinda curious as to what else a chick like you was into.

Bam flipped over the London After Midnight CD you fished out from your personal collection, “So…these guys’re like HIM?”

It was a half lie, but whatever. After that, your boyfriend was hooked.

Since then, Bam was always jumped at the chance to dip his toes into whatever you were into like an overly excitable puppy XD

“Hey- hey, Y/N. Y’think you could try doin’ my makeup sometime?” He was wholeheartedly expecting something like corpse paint,

However, Bam had one of those 80’s movie post-makeover montage moments when the end product looked more like Brandon Lee in The Crow.

You borrow his scarves, he takes your belts, and two of you share accessories and eyeliner to the point you aren’t sure what you bought and what he’s left in your possession.

Though sometimes, Bam’s idiot friends would dog on him a little, but he never let it slide ;)

“What bat cave did she crawl out of, dude?”

Bam grinned as he replied to Rake’s dumbass remark, “Y/N is hot as shit. Maybe if you brushed your teeth once in a while, you wouldn’t have t’go lookin’ for chicks in caves.”

Steve- O

Given that a lot of what Steve does relies on shock value, he would take every opportunity to show you off and the black lipstick kisses you leave on him!

It’s a funny sight at movie premieres- him, in cargo shorts and sneakers, next to you in your patent leather heels and silky black skirts.

However, he really doesn’t know very much about the subculture, which leads to some awkward moments,

“No, Steve. I’m not a dominatrix…”

He tried to spin the question around, chuckling as he flashed a smile, “But if you were, I wouldn’t judge. Who am to turn down a lady in leather?”

“I’m not!” “Well, if that changes…”

Does not have a clue about the music either! You showed him a photo of Nik Fiend and he asked you if he was, ‘like GG Alin’,

You’re still trying to figure that one out...

But he’s still the same, sweet guy he’d be dating any other girl!

God forbid this man finds out you write poetry…Steve would spend hours gushing over your work.

Not that he really gets the deeper meaning- he’s fascinated with your word choice and how you play with language.

“Dude, this is, like- really deep shit…” His eyes went wide as he ogled some stream of consciousness dreck you accidentally left out

“Oh, thanks!” Smiling, you waved a dismissive hand, “I mean, it’s’ just a first draft…I think this line reads kinda trite, and-“

“You should totally publish this! Hey, I got this publishing guy- he can hook you up!” See? Just too sweet…

Chris

As cliche as it sounds, Chris won you over with his musical skills;

He picked up a few of your favorite songs on guitar, and the rest was history!

Pontius had a vague idea of the stuff you listened to, but his knowledge ended at Samhain and Type O Negative.

Like most guys would be, he was immediately fascinated by your look,

“Woah…” Holding up a black silk corset he found in your closet, Chris grinned, “Hey, Y/N? Can I try this on for a sec?”

And on the topic of corsets, he loves watching you get all dressed up! Makeup, hair, shoes- its a spectacle, and he’s always in awe of it :)

Also he doesn’t mind getting a chance to look at you naked

Chris goes to shows with you all the time!!

Much like Johnny, he’s also had a decent ammount of experience in the alternative scene, so he definitely knows all the cool clubs in whatever city you live in ;)

“You look all graceful when you dance- like a sexy bird…” Well, how could you not be flattered by that?

You look so cute together even if Chris is a stark contrast from most guys at the clubs you frequent XD

Well, except that one time he picked you up in eyeliner and this goofy, Jerry Only style faux hawk,

You could barely make it to his car without collapsing from laughter.

“Hey! I wanted to be supportive!” Pontius chuckled, unable to keep a straight face himself at the absurdity of this situation

[thistlerock]

Fabian being the most popular kid in school and the captain of the bloodrush team (since freshman year?? I feel like we don't acknowledge enough that this is insane) and also a straight a student is already incredibly funny to me but the fact he personally killed toxic masculinity (in his opinion) and is, in my opinion, at least a little queer, makes it even better.

Like GOD he's so stereotypical teen movie big mouthed rich jock but he's also not that at ALL and he respects women and he loves his friends so much and he's genuinely such a sweet kid and I love him. I like to think there were guys (especially on the owlbears) who, for maybe a week, were like wow Fabian dances now that's gay (derogatory) (and for the record I know he was flamboyant before but BEFORE he was still trying to be a macho champion guy so it was different but now he's /just/ flamboyant) but Fabian exorcises the toxic masculinity and homophobia out of them. How does he do it? I don't know. It's magic. He's magic.

Im a qpr Fabriz + romantic Mazey/Fabian truther so its extra funny to me that Fabian is like this. Incredibly cool popular hot guy that everyone likes and probably a lot of people are attracted to that throws banger parties and his girlfriend pulls out twister at said parties and doesn't drink (good for her) and is apparently considered unattractive (i like to think this is a. Fantasy racism thing? The less human or elf like a race looks ((like orcs, or goblins, or, well, minotaurs)) the worse off they are) and he also has a fucking loser "boyfriend" (I think they'd prefer the word partner but why would other ppl know that) who YES has a glow up in junior year and is semi-popular but he's certainly not who you'd except Fabian Aramais Seacaster to kiss. Also I'm pretty sure Riz is mostly popular amongst people who are objectively bigger Highschool hierarchy losers than him on the basis of being younger and not being part of the most impressive adventuring party in school lmao.

Speaking of Fabian and Mazey she's taller than him thank you very much. Tall beautiful athletic girlfriend and scrawny short king partner Fabian is the happiest polyam bisexual in the world /j

[angelltheninth]

Another Place for Pleasure

Pairing: Bathin x Fem!Reader

Tags: nsfw, smit, sex in public, against a tree, creampie, rough sex, clit stimulation, almost getting caught

Word count: 0.7k

Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters | Commissions

A/N: I said I would give you a horny fic. Here it is.

"You want to fuck here? Against the tree?" He was already walking towards you with an erection that didn't look like could wait for you to find an empty room. "But this your friend's garden isn't it? Won't he be mad?" The hard bark of the tree pressed against your back as he kept approaching.

Bathin's eyes were almost a dark gray color now, even more excited about the fact that the two of you could get caught very easily in here.

"Mad? No, maybe annoyed but serves him right. He's always annoying me." His hands reached under your little skirt and eased your cute panties to the side. "Moons? Oh baby, you wore these just for me hm? Is that why you didn't want me to peak into your bathroom? You humans are so sweet."

"You a lot for me, you take me to all sorts of places, so I wanted to buy something that would match with you." You reached up and rubbed the little crescent moon tattoo under his eye, watching his eyes flutter closed as his hard cock sank into your glistening pussy. "I thought they'd be a nice surprise but… never expected you to surprise me with this."

He didn't stop pushing until your hips were pressed together and his other hand grabbed your thigh, spreading it just a little more so he could roll his hips in a downward and then upward circle that pushed his cock until he bottomed out and you wrapped your legs around him to give him more room. Bathin didn't wait for a signal, he immediately started moving, a guttural moan leaving your lips as he kept looking longingly at your clit. How he wished he could touch it.

His hands trembled with the need. "Let me." You breathed against his lips and kissed him right as your fingers touched the sensitive bundle of nerves. Short, deep thrusts were his response. He couldn't help himself, bottoming out every time he felt your cunt tighten around him again. "You like that?"

"Mhm. Like everything about you. Like how tight you get when you think we're gonna get caught." It excited him so much, doing it in high-risk spots. As if he had a bucket list he had to fill and he wanted to do it with you. "I want to feel you come around my cock. Can you come for me baby?"

Your cunt clenches and unclenches at his words, your cum dripping down Bathin's balls and pulsing cock. "I can if you come inside me this time. You made a complete mess of my bed last time and then teleported away."

"My bad." He chuckled apologetically, "I'll be sure to give you lots of cum to make up for it. Lots more than your cunt can take."

"Please." You started rolling back against him, "Give me your cum Bathin, give me your cock." Kissing him was all you could do to keep somewhat quiet. Too bad because you really wanted to let him know you were enjoying this, despite your earlier protests.

"Who's there?" Stolas's voice cut through your upcoming orgasm like a sword, your eyes briefly seeing him turn around the corner before you heard a mixed string of curses between him and Bathin.

The next few moments were a blur, literally as Bathin's powers activated and he teleported you away. What you thought was a ruined orgasm came back full force when you felt your back hit your bed and him crash on top of you, the impact causing his cock to slide in all the way, the pressure sending over the edge as his hips kept grinding, into yours, his cock releasing his cum inside of you.

You waited for the aftershocks and jolts to subside before you slapped his shoulder, "Hope that was funny cause I'm ready to die right now."

"And I will welcome you into Hell with open arms." At least you knew there was always a place for you to go. And if there wasn't Bathin would find one, and bring you there when ever you wanted. "Ugh, I can feel a chill going down my spine. I think I'm gonna sleep here tonight, don't feel like talking to Stolas right now." You didn't say it right there and then because he was still very much inside you but their friendship was quite adorable.

[moonydustx]

Hello! I just read law proposing to reader and it's so sweet like-- I wanna cty-

Anyway... what happens on their honeymoon? Would they dock at an island for like a week or so? Just so the two newly weds have some time alone? Or they'd keep sailing after the ceremony? Like- I imagine both happening but I wanna know what you think.

Hi dear anon, sorry for the delay in responding, I was sick this week and everything was delayed.

For me, there are two versions: the ones they would continue to navigate immediately after the ceremony, but I also think mainly that their friends would never let the honeymoon go unnoticed. I also like to think that even after the wedding was over, Law would take short days to spend just with his S/O, locked in the room enjoying each other's presence.

requests open | one piece masterlist

The proposal - the honeymoon (part 3)

Part 1 - Part 2

warnings: brief allusion to sex, but nothing explicit or detailed.

The archipelago filled the horizon more and more as Polar Tang approached. From afar you could see a huge park and what looked like the beach packed with people. You weren't yet used to the idea that came from the minds of Shachi and Penguin - which you soon discovered involved Nami, Robin, Ikkaku. The strong breeze ruffled the layers of the sundress you were wearing, it was also strange not to be wearing a crew jumpsuit.

"The bags are packed." Law's voice took your attention away from the destination you were arriving at.

"I mean, the suitcase. The only one." you grumbled. "What did they do?"

"I'm curious too." Law turned you back to contemplate the sea on the deck and taking advantage of the fact that you were alone, he placed quick kisses on your shoulder.

"Look on the bright side." You grabbed his chin, stroking the little beard that was there. "At least we'll have a few days just for the two of us."

"Ah, finally." He let his head fall under your shoulder, making you laugh openly.

The wedding had been incredible, including the banquet. You just didn't expect the amount of sake to be too much, even if you had ten Zoros as friends. As the night went on, you, Law and practically everyone else had more alcohol than they should have in their blood. The two of you left the party amidst whistles and jokes about the wedding night, but when you reached the room you barely had the strength to take off your dress, just as Law remained with his suit and tie turned in a funny way.

After that, you dealt with all the mess that a wedding can bring and finished restocking the Polar Tang before heading on your way. Combined with all the tiredness and accumulated responsibilities, you and Law still hadn't had the wedding night you'd dreamed of - not even 10 minutes of honeymoon.

"We're here!" you both heard Bepo scream and soon went to disembark from Polar Tang.

While you carried your small bag, Law dragged a not so big suitcase that carried some of the two of your clothes.

"Here are the keys and the address, there's a little map there." Ikkaku placed them both in your hands. "We left you a schedule and also some clothes."

"This is amazing guys."

"So, I'll see you in a week." Law asked and everyone immediately agreed. "Bepo is in charge. Any problems, and I mean any problems, just get in touch."

After a quick goodbye, the two of you headed towards the aforementioned address. Even though he wasn't much for public displays of affection, especially close to strangers, Law took your hand as you dodged fruit baskets and running children. The town fair looked lovely and you hoped you would have some time to explore it at your leisure.

"It seems to be here." the two of you stopped in front of a small wooden door. Law took the lead and opened it, taking the key from your hand.

It was a small but cozy house. As far as he could see, there was a small kitchen full of plants, a sofa and a den den mushi that transmitted video. A shelf with books and more flowers. In the distance you could also see two closed doors, which must have been the room where you were going to stay.

"I hope you like it. The fridge has some things ready and we left some things in the wardrobe too." his attention turned to Law, who had found a small note on the table. "What do you say we see what they got up to?"

"Sounds perfect to me." you took the lead and opened the fridge. Your bag was already thrown somewhere on the table, just as you could see that Law had already gotten rid of his bag.

Inside the fridge you found some alcoholic drinks, some fruit and a huge jar of chocolates that were your favorites. Further down you could see some bottles of wine too.

"Well, that's a great start." you put one in your mouth and approached Law, wanting to put a piece on his lips.

"I prefer this one." He took your lips in a quick kiss. You could complain, but it was undeniable that the sweet chocolate seemed much tastier when it was wrapped around his lips. "Delicious."

"Come on, we have a room to explore." you took his hand heading towards the closed doors.

"Indeed, we do" the malice in his words didn't go unnoticed and as much as you could feel your cheeks blushing, you also wanted to finally enjoy some time alone.

Behind the doors was a huge room. A dark, shaggy rug on the floor and a huge bed that could easily fit the two of you and leave room left. The window on the opposite side of the bed offered a beautiful view of the island, and you could even see the sea with your eyes.

"Wow, it's so beautiful." you laughed as you saw Law throw himself onto the bed and his body sink. "You look comfortable my love."

"Not only does it look good, it's actually good. Did you find anything out there?" he asked as soon as he saw you standing in front of the rustic and large closet that was at the other end of the room.

"I'm about to find out."

You opened the two wardrobe doors, finding some dresses that looked comfortable, hanging along with some other pieces. On the other side, some flowery t-shirts made of the same light fabric were piled up for Law. You also saw flip-flops, sunscreen, and some cosmetics.

"Just some clothes, some things… Wait." you bent down, grabbing a small black box from underneath what would be your side of the wardrobe.

Your surprise didn't go unnoticed by Law, who quietly got up and stood behind you, who didn't notice the movement. Inside the black box were several tiny panties - which most appreciate just threads and jewelry sewn together - some things that looked like lubricants, handcuffs and various other sex toys.

"Now that's interesting." Law's low voice whispered in your ear, making you shiver. One of his hands attached itself to your waist, while the other went to the box.

"I'm going to find out which one of them did this." you replied, feeling your body burn with shyness. However, the way you felt Law pull your body against his indicated what plans he had in mind.

"Leave that for later." his lips went down to your neck, while one of his hands reached into the small box. "I bet you'd look even hotter in this one." he held up a small white piece and handed it to you. His hand then went back to the box and grabbed the pair of handcuffs.

"What do you want to do?" your hands found his hat and slid down to where the dark strands of his hair appeared.

"Now that we're married, you're stuck with me." Again, his lips descended dangerously on the back of your neck. "I think it's time to make this more literal."

That morning ended exactly the same way as the evening of the same day and many other moments throughout the week. You still hadn't realized how much being confined inside a submarine could take away certain freedoms from both of you. The two of you woke up tangled up, soon after you were on the beach; You would go back to your room and decide to continue the activity with a view of the sea, then choose one of the small shops for dinner. Kitchen, living room, sofa, bathroom. You would make a point of thanking whoever had chosen the house.

The moon lit up the room and no matter how much sleep was present, you couldn't sleep. Maybe it was because of the small sadness that occupied your heart when you knew that it was the last night you would spend there and that the next day you would leave, maybe it was the noise of music coming from outside, but it was probably an uncomfortable noise coming from the kitchen.

As you watched Law, you could see that he was far away in the dream world. His tattooed back was lit by the moon and the only thing stopping him from being completely naked was a sheet over him. You stood up and put on panties - normal this time - and a black shirt that had been on your husband's body for a few hours ago.

You looked in every corner of the kitchen and found nothing, nothing that could be making such a mess at that hour. When you reached the sofa you then realized. A tiny black ball of fur, huddled next to one of the rugs, caught your attention.

"Oh no." You picked up what was supposed to be a small black cat kitten, on one of its paws there were some thorns. "Let me help you."

You first tried hard to remove the thorns, but were unsuccessful as the cat complained every time you touched the injured area. Soon after, you tried to find the litter he belonged to, but there was no sign of a cat around the house. Only one solution ran through his mind. You left the cat on the sofa and went in search of Law, you just didn't expect to find him already leaving the room.

"Everything is fine?" he asked, still drowsy, trying to understand your disappearance from the bed.

"We need to talk."

"Now?" he looked indignant, still yawning.

"I want to have a baby." As soon as the words left his mouth, Law's color seemed to leave him along with the sleep he seemed to be feeling. His mouth opened and closed a few times, searching for words. "No, not that. A baby, a kitten. He's alone, he's hurt and I don't know what to do."

"Okay… I understand" he accepted almost automatically, still stuck in his first conception of what a baby would be. "I just wouldn't go around informing anyone like that."

"I'm just a little anxious, help me, love, please." You pouted making the task almost irresistible for him. "I don't know what else to do."

"Let me see him." Law followed you to the couch and saw the little ball of fur bundled up. "Hey man, you don't look good."

"I tried to take it away, I tried to give it food, but he won't let me touch his paw."

"Wait for me in the room, maybe you don't like seeing it." Law asked and even though you were reluctant, you nodded and walked away from the two.

It took more minutes than you expected and you had probably already walked around the entire room more than ten times when Law opened the door, bringing the small cat and a small pot in your hands.

"Someone was hungry." He sat down and placed the kitten on the floor, next to the pot that looked like some crushed fruit.

"Thank you my love." you hug him, placing countless kisses on Law's head. "We need to buy food for him."

"Is he really going with us?" Law turned up, finding an expression that made it clear that the decision had already been made. "What will it be called?"

"I'll let you choose. But think carefully first." Law untangled your arms from him, just so he could place you sitting on his legs.

"Thank you my dear."

"For letting you choose the name?"

"Not only that, but for choosing me." He still held you close, as if he was afraid you were going to disappear. "For choosing to love me and of course, for growing our family."

-- Extra 01

"So, did you like the gifts?" Ikkaku took your arm and pulled you away from the others. The boys seemed more entertained by the little cat than by your return.

"Was you?!"

"It was and I hope you brought everything back because the owner of the house is a nice old lady, she doesn't need to know about these things."

"Well, I brought the toys and a single panty." you replied, the victorious smile was clear on your lips.

"One? Just one? Did you miss all the others?"

"I didn't lose them, they're just no longer usable." you responded as naturally as possible, laughing as you saw the meaning of the words reach your friend. "Actually two, the first one I think Law wanted to keep as a souvenir."

"Oh God, no, I won't think about that." She left apparently traumatized and leaving you laughing about the situation.

--Extra 02

You had already done your tasks in the command room, updated your medicine stock and it was almost lunch time. As you approached your room, you knew that Law wouldn't be that busy at this time and it would be a great time to have lunch together. You just didn't expect to find him holding the cat on the table, the small black cat resting on both paws, as if the feline were a toy fighting with two other action figures.

"And the warrior Sora took down the…" Law - and the cat - noticed your present. "I was just.. Sora and I were just having fun." He tried to find a justification, making you laugh even more.