#so please always feel free to send me an ask if I’ve used terminology I shouldn’t or whatever else

[traumasurvivors]

If you have trauma as a result of dealing with delusions and/or psychosis, your trauma is valid.

Trauma is largely about how you feel and how something impacts you. And even if you know something isn’t “real”, it doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t real. And it doesn’t change how real it feels to you.

[gladiatorcunt]

# RULES - ♱ ♱ ♱

“They're angelic symbols, passed on to mankind by the archangel Gabriel.”

+ general ::

♱ 18+ , no minors may interact. ageless blogs will be blocked. for blank blogs: if you have an age in your bio and you don’t seem like a bot, i’ll let it slide. tws will be tagged accordingly but lmk if i’ve missed any. requests are open and if you’re not sure if i write for a fandom/character, just ask. do not copy, repost, or translate my work anywhere. all writing is my own. dm’s and asks are also open

♱ dark fic & non dark fic topics welcome (specifics below but since i’ll definitely forget stuff, feel free to ask. will be more dark content focused overall though)

♱ no ultra specific requests (reader’s full appearance or background, basically outlining an entire fic that you should maybe write yourself, etc.)

♱ mainly smut reader inserts including those that vaginas and/or dicks w/ different terminology for specific parts being used on occasion (please understand that my readers won’t be neurotypical or all that extroverted as it’s hard for me to get in the headspace to write that. and also that having a certain style of dress, feminine or masculine, doesn’t mean that that reader is a man or a woman. & gn pronouns doesn’t always mean nb it just means a general they/them that anyone can read and imagine themselves in.)

♱ plus sized reader is the only physical trait i will typically involve (other than glasses sometimes) bc i’m plus sized (no hate to people who aren’t plus sized, i’m just tired, and i write for myself at the end of the day)

♱ i can’t shut up so requesting other parts is fine but please do so respectfully and with the understanding that it might not be a priority or that it might not happen

♱ trying to work and go to school so i don’t have a posting schedule. i also do not take requests atm but ideas/thirsts/suggestions are fine with the understanding that they may never see the light of day

♱ i reserve the right to not fulfill a request or write something i said i was going to if life gets in the way, i’m just not feeling it, or it’s a topic/fandom/character i don’t write for

# REQUESTING & ASKS - ♱ ♱ ♱

“One for every sin. So quite a few.”

[dune, the boys, elden ring, wuwa, & original content]

+ i won’t write ::

♱ extreme physical abuse (character enjoys hurting reader in whatever non sexual way or vice versa), cnc (triggering for me and not how i personally cope), scat, degradation, hardcore humiliation, whipping, exhibitionism where people are actually watching, cheating (character on reader), torture, hardcore bdsm, choking to the point someone passes out, anything involving frogs (same reason), child abuse/csa (reader can have a past that involves those things but no explicit descriptions), love triangles (they’re either poly by the end or not, i’m not into the tsitp type drama), pornstar au (not for me), blindfolds/object gags, pegging, unrequited love (let me be delusional), characters or reader making the other(s) jealous on purpose or because it’s funny (just a personal pet peeve), orgasm delay/denial, dom reader (will write this on occasion but it’s never a sure thing), only character x character

+ i will write ::

♱ pregnancy (either in the baby trapping way or otherwise), non dark fic topics, dub con, toxicity aside from cheating & physical abuse & bullying, obsessive/possessive behavior, oviposition, yandere, manipulation, kidnapping, gentle & slightly harder non con, wax play, psuedo-incest, rpf (no underage people obviously), knifeplay, face slapping, incest (ONLY WHEN IT COMES TO HOTD/ANY TARGARYEN YALL PLEASE-), omegaverse, vomit, pain play, monster/creature stuff, bondage/leashes, characters or reader as hybrids, age gap (no underage stuff anyway between minors but also no age gaps involving minors), au/s, female characters, oc x reader, etc.

+ don’t send messages about ::

♱ the crow remake & bill skarsgård (i’m 50/50 on him objectively but don’t push it, messages that focus more on him are fine i guess. it’s more the remake itself.)

♱ hades game spoilers, god of war ragnarok spoilers, honkai star rail spoilers, arkham knight trilogy spoilers, baldurs gate 3 spoilers, gotham knights spoiler, assassins creed odyssey and origins spoilers, borderlands presequel spoilers, persona 5 spoilers (or anything i mention currently reading or watching or playing

♱ deeply personal trauma/info that can doxx you (asking for advice is fine), i’m sympathetic but i’m a stranger on the internet. also nothing about hating kids or marriage or people in relationships, at my core i’m an obsessive romantic that wants to get married and have kids someday.

♱ asks that pretend to know me irl or be one of my mutuals, i am paranoid and i will believe you. anything about drugs (other than weed) and mental health medication/anti psychotics unless i’m asking for advice. no selfship stuff unless you’re my mutual, (you can interact obviously i just don’t wanna be messaged about it too heavily). and no hate towards subliminals or reality shifting

♱ any nightwing ship (and the dickbabs cheating thing) that’s not dickkory or him x me, i do not play about that man. so therefore, no nw slander unless i started it lmao.

♱ any anti spirituality or predatory/bigoted christian behavior (those spam sounding ‘you’re going to hell but jesus can save you’ youtube comments) . also no fear mongering when it comes to politics, and no ‘but voting for kamala won’t do anything’ (if you’re in the us just don’t vote for trump idgaf).

♱ meeting my faves irl (esp hayden christensen), i’m so happy for you objectively but my eyes will twitch out of my head.

♱ lewd things directed at me, no strong flirting if you’re not a mutual i’ve known for a bit, any vagueness that my ND brain could not pick up on (say what you mean and i’d appreciate tone tags).

♱ cw dc shows (other than smallville) & disney star wars (check my about me for the shows i like), any strong love for han solo (he’s just a guy to me and also atton rand clears).

♱ eddie munson, tengen uzui from demon slayer, or eren yaeger (sorry, also don’t ask about stranger things or attack on titan in general). also no drake meat riding (i’m a kendrick fan)

♱ the stereotype that southern people are dumb/etc. any hate towards people in extremely rural areas specifically (don’t call me a redneck that gives me the biggest ick)

♱ the whole scott/logan/jean/her clone/emma thing. my main x-men ships are cherik, scott/logan, logan/nightcrawler/storm, mystique/hank, logan/storm, jean/storm, logan/nightcrawler, rogue/gambit, & bobby drake/johnny storm.

♱ anything overtly negative and pessimistic, including sui ideation and/or you having a GENUINE psychotic break or mental breakdown. (i wouldn’t recommend a hotline immediately but if you don’t have a trusted person in you’re circle to talk to they can maybe get you through that moment.)

♱ a demand for a follow4follow type relationship, ‘i’ll reblog your fic ONLY if you’llreblog mine’, any obviously conditional support for example: don’t follow and then once i’ve followed back or reblogged with your posts, unfollow me.

♱ batman being an abusive dad & damien slander, anything having to do with slade or trigon (teen titans trauma, also don’t ask about teen titans go), the ric grayson plot, dc live action movie flash & aquaman (justice league 2004 aquaman is my fav aquaman)

♱ anti anakin/hayden’s acting slander or overtly pro jedi opinions, DO ask me about star wars lore & it’s universe in general bc it’s my number one interest.

♱ larian studios meat riding, hate towards ascended astarion and the people that like him, any mention of that one writer who’s name starts with a w, durgetash/gortash, any astarion ship that’s not him x tav or x reader (esp him x gale), downplaying wyll’s treatment, hate towards evil route players.

♱ pro daemon targaryen sentiments (or disrespectful hotd fandom war behavior of any kind). i’m team green but i love characters from both sides and also it’s not a real war!

if you’re uncomfortable with any of the above topics, filter the tag/content so you won’t have to see it from me

- gladiatorcunt 2023 ++ intro.

[ceterisparibus116]

How would you go about writing a character who has a profession you’re unfamiliar with? For example, I’d love to write and see more of Lawyer Matt in fanfiction, but I never studied law and I don’t know where to start, the terminology, what cases could actually look like, etc. Do you do a lot of research beforehand? (Also, since you’re a lawyer, perhaps you could give me some legal advice per fanfiction writing? 😊) Also a huge fan of your work 😃

Hiii! This is such an awesome ask, tysm. (Because I too want to see more Lawyer!Matt in fanfiction, lol.)

This is going to be an incredibly long answer because I basically want to give you as much information as possible, and just share as much information as possible for anyone else who’s interested. Some of this is pretty technical; others are just facts I share in the hopes that you can get a sense of a "day in the life" or a lawyer or law student, or even maybe get a plot bunny based on something.

Also, for the record, if anyone wants some of my law school notes on a given topic, I’m happy to share. And feel free to shoot me asks/dms if you have specific questions! (And please do NOT feel the need to read the whole document before you send me asks. The document is just in case it helps you; you can ask me about anything and I won’t be like “Hey read the document first.”)

[That said, I legally can’t give you legal advice. Please don’t ask me about actual legal problems. This is just for fics.]

[Fellow law blogs, please feel free to suggest edits/corrections.]

Anyway, here’s the index, so to speak. I recommend using ctrl + f to navigate to different sections.

Websites

Vocabulary/terminology

Civil procedure

Trial

Criminal procedure: investigation

Criminal procedure: adjudication

Evidence (trust me this stuff is cool and will make you seem super smart)

Tricks for making trial scenes cool

Law school stuff (for those sweet, sweet law school fics)

*NEW SECTION* Day in the life (for figuring out what Matt and Foggy are up to on normal days at the office)

WEBSITES:

So first off, here’s a site that has TONS of legal information presented in a really accessible way, since it’s designed for non-lawyers. It also goes beyond just saying “here’s what X is” to sometimes saying “here’s what X looks like in real life.” Anyway, the cite is findlaw.com, and you can google “what is an arraignment findlaw.com” for example to get some great insight. Seriously, I highly recommend just poking around the site. You’re sure to learn stuff.

This is also a good cite for general legal information: Cornell Law School’s Legal Information Institute.

I’ve also straight-up bookmarked this site: penal code. It’s all the crimes in New York, including not only what the crimes involve but what the penalties are. THAT SAID, be sure to also check out what Findlaw.com has to say about the crimes, because the site ALSO includes defenses to crimes. Just – always go to Findlaw.com at some point in your research. That’s my advice. :P

Another thing you can do is just google a question and look for search results from law firms. ESPECIALLY if you google the question and add “New York” and then look at results from New York law firms, as they’ll speak more to what New York law is like. (However, very few people will care if your legal elements are specific to New York, so that’s not a biggie unless you, like, wanna show off.)

Oh, and here’s a guide to New York’s rules of evidence in case you wanna get fancy and start throwing rule numbers around(WHICH IS LITERALLY SO COOL PLEASE WRITE MATT DOING THIS I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER). What I’m talking about is how an attorney at trial can object to something by saying, for example, “Objection, irrelevant,” but they can ALSO object by saying “Objection, [rule number e.g. 4.01]” and it’s just so fun and smart and makes you feel like a wizard casting spells. Also it’s a good trial tactic if you don’t want the jury to know what you’re upset about. Like, if you say “Objection, more prejudicial than probative” than all jurors who know what “prejudicial” means are gonna sit up like “Oh??? This hurts your case? Oh???” and you def don’t want that.

VOCABULARY:

I’m now gonna take a sec to walk through some, like, Law 101, since it’s hard to google stuff like “arraignment” if you don’t even know that’s a thing. I’ll bold words as I go through so they stand out in case you or anyone else wants to make note of them to research more later. And I’ll start with some important vocabulary.

[Interjection: as you explore legal concepts, you can also google “[concept] jury instructions” and find an explanation of the legal issue designed for jurors. Again, it’s ideal to search for New York jury instructions specifically, but if that doesn’t work, don’t sweat it.]

In general, lawyers can be referred to as “Counsel” or “Counselor.” (As in, “Are you ready to proceed, Counselor?”) Lawyers on the same side are co-counsel. Lawyers against each other are opposing counsel. Lawyers also refer to each other by their “side” (e.g. “the prosecution says X,” “the plaintiff misstates the fact,” and “the defense is clueless.”)

In the United States, the legal world is basically split into two categories: criminal and civil. Criminal is a narrower area of law; civil includes everything from property transactions to immigration to family law (although immigration and family law often have their own “courts” like “family court” and usually have some unique rules). It gets a little confusing in that there’s some overlap between criminal and civil; “assault” and “battery,” for example, are both torts (civil offenses) and a criminal offenses.

In a criminal case, you have the prosecutor/prosecution against the defendant/defense. The prosecutor is a government-employed attorney who represents the state (in state crimes, where the prosecutor might also be simply referred to as “the State”) or the US government (in federal crimes); the defense attorney can be either a private defense attorney paid for by the defendant (the person accused of a crime) or a public defender(paid for by the government). Defendants are guaranteed the right to an attorney, which is why public defenders are so important. That being said, even private defense attorneys can be “conflict” attorneys, which is where there’s a conflict of interest between the public defender and the defendant; in such instances, the court will instruct a private defense attorney to act as a public defender.

[This is cool because it means Matt and Foggy, despite being private defense attorneys, can still take a public defender role, which is something I’m really excited for in a future fic. Anyway.]

In a civil case, you have the plaintiff against the defendant. The plaintiff is just an ordinary person (or group or entity) who was allegedly harmed by the defendant. In the civil world, plaintiff and defense attorneys are private (e.g. paid for by the client rather than by the government).

There are two key parts to any case: legal issues and factual issues. Factual issues are questions like “Who did what?” and “Why did they do that?” and “Was that reasonable?” whereas legal issues are those like, “Was the contract valid?” or “What was the standard of care?” (which is specific concept from negligence that you can google if you want). The judge rules on issues of law (also including the admissibility of evidence) whereas the jury rules on issues of fact (basically asking, “What do we believe happened?”). However, the judge can also be a fact-finder if it’s a bench trial.

[This is important to keep in mind because the way you present a case is very different if you’re speaking to a judge who (presumably!!! But definitely not always!) knows the law at least as well as you do, vs if you’re speaking to jurors who sometimes neither understand nor care about legal nuances of a case.]

Also: evidence is broad: anything from physical evidence (like a gun) to digital evidence (like pictures or footage) to witness testimony is evidence. All evidence must be admissible to be presented before a jury. And speaking of evidence: if one party objects to evidence (because they want the evidence excluded) and the judge overrules, that means the judge DISAGREED with the objection and the evidence can be admitted. If the judge sustains, that means the judge AGREED with the objection, and the evidence is excluded. (Idk why Matt, in S3, “sustains” his own objection. I think they meant to say “overruled,” since that would be more in line with Matt’s self-deprecating humor (and Charlie Cox’s sort of sheepish delivery) to disagree with his own objection? Idk.)

Every case, whether civil or criminal, is made up of counts(also in criminal cases called charges). Counts are basically “things for which a person is liable” or “things that are illegal.” For example: battery and assault are both counts/charges. Every count is made up of elements. For example, the elements of assault (in both civil and criminal law) are: 1) intent; 2) reasonable apprehension of harmful contact; and 3) causation. The plaintiff/prosecutor has to prove ALL THREE ELEMENTS to win their case. If the defense pokes a hole in just one element, the plaintiff/prosecution loses. (Sometimes elements are also called prongs, but this is usually when “elements” are used in another context besides referring to counts. So, like, in Constitutional law, there are tons of “tests” for things, and the elements of a test is called a prong. If you have satisfy a prong, you can also be said to have met a prong. E.g. “Only three out of four prongs were met.”)

By the way, the counts come from statutes. Civil and criminal statutes explain what the law is. Statutes are passed by the legislature. It is NOT appropriate for a judge to ignore or change statutes (no matter how much they may dislike them). Judges merely INTERPRET statutes.

Besides the attorneys, the parties/clients, and the judge and jury, other cool people to take note of are: the judge’s clerk (this is the person who swears in witnesses and handles the judge’s calendar – do NOT offend the clerk as they will certainly let the judge know if you’re a jerk) and the bailiff (security in the courtroom). Some judges also have law clerks who are very, very special (jk – just, I’m currently a law clerk) who are lawyers fresh out of law school who basically help the judge research, decide issues, and write opinions (which are written documents announcing a holding (e.g. whether the judge is granting or denying someone’s request) and the reasoning behind it).

If a proceeding (like a hearing or a trial) is on record, you have to have a court reporter to write down the transcript. Traditionally, the court reporter sits in the courtroom and types everything on a special computer. Some modern courtrooms do remote court reporting where the court reporter is somewhere else and transcribes as they listen.

If anyone important to the trial speaks a different language, you have to have an interpreter. Some interpreters have a device that lets them speak directly into the other person’s ear and translate simultaneous to whatever’s being said. Other times, the court interpreter talks like everyone else: this means other people have to pause to let the interpreter speak. (Example: the judge says, “We are here for a hearing in the matter of State v. Jones.” Pause. The interpreter then interprets. Then the judge keeps going.) The interpreter repeats exactly what is said without any personal commentary. If the interpreter needs to speak on their own behalf, they indicate this by referring to themselves. (E.g. “The interpreter requests the attorneys slow down.” This happens a lot.)

A case can be referred to as a case, a matter, an action, and a suit (if it’s civil), distinguished by the name of the client. “Case” is the broadest term and it’ll probably never sound weird if you use it (anything from a casual “I’m working on Smith’s case” to a formal “We’re here concerning the case of Smith v [whatever]”). “Matter” is a phrase most often used by judges, I think. When they call the case, they might say “We’re here for a hearing on the matter of Smith v. [whatever]”). “Action” and “suit” usually refer to what type of case it is (“The Smith case is a civil action” or “The Smith case is a civil suit” but it would sound weird to say “the Smith action” or “The Smith suit”).

Cases are named according to the parties. The plaintiff or prosecution is named first. (So in “Smith v. Jones,” Smith is the plaintiff and Jones is the defense; in “State v. Jones,” the prosecutor is the State and Jones is the defendant.) However, in appellate cases, the appellant who files the case is named first; the other party is the respondent. So if in the civil case of “Smith v. Jones,” Jones loses and then appeals, the appellate case would be “Jones v. Smith.” Also, cases are usually italicized (sometimes underlined). So the proper way to write it would be Smith v. Jones and Jones v. Smith. When attorneys are familiar with a case, either because it’s famous in their field of law or because they’ve been relying on it during a particular case, they’ll refer to it either by the first name (“Smith” or by the defendant in a criminal case (“Jones”) since otherwise every criminal case would just be “State”).

Jurors have a little room called the jury room where they go to deliberate. Normally, jurors can go home each day (like at 5pm), but if the trial is particularly important and/or there’s high publicity, jurors may be sequestered, which means they’re put somewhere like a hotel where no one from the public can reach them. The goal is to prevent them from hearing things about the trial that might be legally inadmissible. Juries are provided lunch, usually pizza or sandwiches.

The judge is said to be “on the bench.” Attorneys might “approach the bench” to talk to the judge, or the judge could be said to “take the bench” when they start being a judge.

A mistrial is when something goes so wrong that you have to have the trial all over again. Some examples of things that could cause a mistrial: one of the attorneys saying something they shouldn’t or one of the jurors doing independent investigation and sharing what they learn with the other jurors.

Evidence that a lawyer intends to use at trial is called an exhibit. Every exhibit is marked for identification purposes, usually something like “Plaintiff’s Exhibit 1,” which is what it will be referred to at trial. More on evidence below.

Each case can only be brought within the statute of limitations. If the statute of limitations “runs,” it’s too late to bring the case. This is true of both civil and criminal cases. The statute of limitations for some civil issues might be only 2 years; the statute of limitations for some criminal offenses might be 10 years, or there might be no statute of limitation at all. (The rationale is twofold: justice and efficiency. Justice because it’s unjust to make people to live the rest of their lives with small infractions hanging over their heads; efficiency because it’s inefficient to try to bring a case through the system years after the infraction occurred, when witnesses may have moved or died or evidence is gone. Statutes of limitations can also be “tolled” (basically, the countdown doesn’t start) for various reasons. Please hit me up if you have questions; I am PASSIONATE about this topic.)

Another piece of vocabulary that’s small but comes up a lot and is nice to get right is: motion. In this context, a motion is a noun: attorneys file a motion asking the court to do something. The verb is “move,” as in, “I move for a continuance.” I bring this up because Matt in Season 2 suggests that they “motion for a continuance” which is just…not quite right. (But I get why the writers did that; “motion for continuance” sounds more professional than “move for a continuance” – it’s just wrong, lol.) (Continuance, by the way, is just a delay. Like pushing the date of a hearing or a trial back.)

Attorneys file briefs in support of motions (and arguments, like appellate arguments, which is when one side appeals a judge or jury’s decision). Briefs usually include a statement of the facts of the case and an analysis of how the relevant law applies to the facts. The law is case law (aka rules found from other opinions). Precedent is case law that is binding on a judge (for example, U.S. Supreme Court case law is binding on every judge), whereas case law that is not binding is just persuasive. (Like, Pennsylvania case law is not binding on a New York judge, but it’s probably more persuasive than, say, California case law, just because Pennsylvania is closer and as such has more in common with New York.) A LOT of an attorney’s time is spent researching case law on legal databases. The two most common databases are Westlaw and Lexis. (Westlaw fans and Lexis fans are bitter rivals. Lexis is better. Fight me.)

Payment from a client (so not prosecutors or public defenders who are paid by the government) is either by retainer or as a contingency fee. This is where a lawyer receives a percentage of the money the client wins at trial or in a settlement. It is unethical for private criminal defense attorneys (like Matt and Foggy) to be paid on a contingency fee. Private criminal defense attorneys are paid on a retainer, which means the client gives the lawyer a certain amount of money up front, and the lawyer uses that money to fund the case (pay for their own time in research and preparation and pay for other expenses, like hiring investigators or expert witnesses). This is why it is said that a client has retained a lawyer or that a lawyer is on retainer.

Let’s zoom out again to civil and criminal law. There are two main differences between civil and criminal law. One is the outcome. A guilty verdict in criminal law results in imprisonment and/or a fine to the court, and potentially the revocation of other privileges and rights. However, a verdict of “liable” in civil court can result in an injunction (the court ordering someone to do something or stop doing something) and/or fines paid directly to the victim. (Criminal offenses sometimes result in restitution to victims, but not always. Mostly that’s just if the victim had to pay for hospital bills, or if the criminal stole something from them.) [Please note that it’s super important to remember that civil suits aren’t JUST about money; injunctions are very powerful, and although defense attorneys like to act like civil plaintiffs are only interested in money, that’s not necessarily true.]

The other main difference is the “burden of proof.” The burden of proof is the amount of evidence needed to prosecution or plaintiff needs to prove their case. Most civil cases must be proven by a preponderance of the evidence, which just means the jury (or judge in a fact-finding role – but I’m just gonna talk about juries for simplicities’ sake) needs to be convinced that the plaintiff’s version of events is “more likely than not” true. [Note: some civil issues actually have to be proven by clear and convincing evidence, which is higher than a preponderance but no one really knows how exactly to quantify it.] Criminal cases need to be proven by “beyond a reasonable doubt.” [Note: it’s beyond a REASONABLE doubt, not beyond any doubt someone could possibly come up with.] “Beyond a reasonable doubt” is the HIGHEST burden of proof in the United States, which is because the consequences of a criminal conviction can include the deprivation of the defendant’s liberty, and the United States (…uh, theoretically, anyway) prioritizes liberty so highly. [Don’t get me started, then, on why it’s so absurdly stupid that immigration cases don’t need to be proven by beyond a reasonable doubt, even though the consequences could be deprivation of liberty or worse. It’s horrible.]

One more thing that I know will come up in fics: attorney-client privilege is NOT the same as attorney-client confidentiality. However, both apply not only when a client actually is a lawyer’s client, but even when the client is merely a prospective client. (No, Karen did not have to pay Foggy to secure either privilege or confidentiality. But it was a sweet gesture.) The difference is: Confidentiality is much broader; privilege is only evidentiary (which means it relates to admissibility). Confidentiality prevents a lawyer from sharing client details with anyone who’s not on the case (including the lawyer’s friends, family, etc.); privilege only prevents a lawyer from sharing client details in a legal proceeding. Both confidentiality and privilege can only be waived by the client.

With that said, on to how trials (and cases) actually work.

CIVIL PROCEDURE

Broadly speaking, the progression of a civil case is as follows:

- The plaintiff’s attorney files a complaint with the court which explains how they believe they were wronged by the defendant (this involves counts [aka bad acts, like “breach of contract” or “theft” or whatever] and the factual allegations supporting each count, and ends with a plea for relief [asking for injunctions or money or in some cases declaratory judgment which is basically where the judge just rules on what something is, like “This is a valid contract”])

- The plaintiff’s attorney files someone to serve the complaint on the defendant (so the defendant has “notice” of the allegations against them)

- The defendant files an answer in which they can do several things, such as admit/deny allegations contained in the complaint and/or raise certain defenses and objections commonly known as 12bdefenses and objections (such as “improper service” aka “dude I never got notice of the allegations” or my favorite “failure to state a claim for which relief can be granted” aka, basically, “I don’t know what you’re talking about??? That’s not a law???”)

- The defendant can also file a counterclaim (saying “actually, Plaintiff, YOU hurt ME”) with their answer and raise any affirmative defenses they think are available to them (such as, for example, “consent” which is a defense to battery; so for example if I take a karate class and get hit in the face and then I sue the instructor, they can claim that I consented to the physical contact)

- Note: if the defendant fails to answer within a certain amount of days, the plaintiff is awarded a default judgment in their favor. Yay for them

- Okay but assuming we get past the initial pleadings stage (the complaint, answer, counterclaim, etc. are all “pleadings”), we get to the fun part: discovery! Discovery is where the attorneys try to collect facts. They can do this through requests for admissions(basically you just send a document saying “admit you did X” and the other side either admits or denies), interrogatories (you send a list of questions like “How old were you when you signed the contract” or “list what you believe you consented to” and the other side has to answer), depositions(sitting a witness down and examining them under oath), requests for physical/mental evaluations, “requests for documents and things” (like, “give me all the emails between X date and Y date” or “give me a copy of the security footage”), and subpoenas (which is how you get discovery from non-parties aka people outside the case).

- Note: the other side can also object to your discovery requests, e.g. saying you’re seeking privileged information (such as information protected under doctor-patient or attorney-client privilege) or saying your discovery is too broad or something. But if the judge (who, again, handles legal/evidentiary questions and so handles discovery disputes) says “No you gotta answer the discovery requests” and the other side fails to do so, you (the requesting party) can file a motion to compel discovery where you ask the judge to order the other side to answer your requests.

- Also note: some discovery HAS to be provided; these are mandatory disclosures. One thing that is mandatory to disclose is the name and contact info of everyone you expect to call as a witness. In real life, surprise witnesses should not be happening, and if you fail to disclose a witness to the other side, the judge might not let you call the witness at trial.

- As you collect evidence, at some point you might file a motion for summary judgment. This is where you say there are no factual disputes left, and so the only question is whether one side wins as a matter of law. This means the judge can decide the issue on legal grounds without sending the case to the jury. Summary judgments are disfavored in US courts because, frankly, there’s almost always a question of fact, which means the case needs to go before a jury.

- Okay, if we get this far and summary judgment isn’t granted (and neither party settles which is where they reach their own agreement outside of court, which can be the result of just negotiation between the parties or of formal mediation and/or arbitration), we get to the fun stuff: TRIAL!

- Trial starts with jury selection aka voir dire. Jury selection is such an underrated part of the case (although I really appreciate that Daredevil gave us a hint of that with the Frank Castle trial). First the judge weeds out jurors by asking about issues that’d be true in all cases (like scheduling conflicts). Then the plaintiff’s attorney followed by the defense attorney each get to briefly introduce themselves and explain their perspective on the case, and ask questions designed to a) find jurors they think will agree with them, and b) find jurors they think WON’T agree with them. They can also use their questions to try to frame the case a certain way and signal what they want jurors to look for during the trial. After the questions are done, the attorneys can make an unlimited number of challenges for cause (asking to exclude certain jurors for articulable reasons like “This person’s obviously biased against my client’s gender”) and a limited number (usually 3) of peremptory challenges (excluding certain jurors for no apparent reason – although the other side can object if they think it’s motivated by racism or sexism).

- Note: in New York, civil trials only have 6 jurors (and one or more alternate jurors in case something goes wrong).

Trial:

Tbh I'm continuing my explanation of the civil process, but most of this also applies to criminal trials as well (just substitute "prosecution" for "plaintiff"):

At various points prior to the jury being seated, attorneys can file motions in limine basically asking to admit or exclude evidence ahead of time. This saves time during trial. The judge may decide they need to have an evidentiary hearing to determine whether it should be admissible.

Once the jury is seated, the judge will go over some rules with them (tbh you can google scripts for this if you want, or you can just skip that part), and then the plaintiff gets to give their opening statement in which they lay out what they intend to prove. What’s important about an opening statement is that the attorney can’t argue the case; all they can do is spell out what they will prove. So instead of the plaintiff saying “This is totally wrong!” they’ll say something like, “The evidence will show that this behavior was illegal.” See the difference? (Foggy, uh, doesn’t do a great job at the don’t-be-argumentative-in-opening-statement thing, tbh.)

The defense attorney gives their opening statement next.

After opening statements, the plaintiff gets to call their witnesses. No matter how many witnesses are called, it goes like this: plaintiff direct examines the witness, defense cross examines the witness, and then plaintiff can re-direct and defense can re-cross(repeat ad nauseum until the judge gets annoyed). Same story with each subsequent witness.

Direct examination means the attorney who calls the witness must ask open-ended questions (basically what, where, why, when, how questions). During cross-examination, the attorney who did not call the witness can ask leading questions which imply an answer (e.g. “You like chocolate, don’t you?” and “Isn’t it true you love cats?”). The attorney who calls a witness can ask leading questions of their own witness only if a) it’s foundational (e.g. “Your name is Karen, isn’t it?”); b) the witness is a child and the judge gives you permission; and c) the witness is hostile and the judge gives you permission. THE FACT THAT A WITNESS BECOMES A HOSTILE WITNESS DOES NOT MEAN YOU GET TO TURN AROUND AND GIVE A SPEECH TO THE JURY, MATT. It only means you get to ask leading questions of the witness.

Also: if each side has two attorneys (co-counsel, like Matt and Foggy) only the lawyer who direct-examines the witness can respond to objections, and only the lawyer for the other side who crosses the witness can make objections. So if Matt direct-examines Frank Castle, and Reyes cross-examines him, then Reyes can object and Matt can respond; Tower CAN’T object, and if Reyes objects, Foggy CAN’T respond.

Once the plaintiff has called all their witnesses, they rest their case (or, more technically, rest their case in chief).

At this point, the defense can motion for a “judgment notwithstanding the verdict” more commonly known as a “directed verdict” in which the defense basically says, “Look, the plaintiff had their chance to put on their case, and they failed to prove the elements. We don’t even need to call any witnesses; the plaintiff has the burden of proof, and they failed to meet that proof.” The judge then considers all the plaintiff’s evidence (“in the light most favorable to the plaintiff” since the plaintiff is the non-moving party, which basically means if there’s a slight uncertainty the judge should resolve it in the plaintiff’s favor) and decides whether the trial should continue. If the judge grants the directed verdict, defense wins; if not, they go on to the defense’s case in chief.

For the defense’s case in chief, the defense calls their witnesses, and the cycle is inverted: defense direct-examines, plaintiff cross-examines, and then defense re-directs and plaintiff re-crosses, etc. etc. Then the defense rests their case in chief.

Once all the witnesses have been called, the judge will give the jury their jury instructions, which explain the law the jury needs to understand so they can apply it to the facts. For example, the jury instructions will include explanations of every element of every count.

Then the plaintiff gives their closing argument. This is where the plaintiff explains why they think they proved their case. A good closing argument carefully walks the jury through the elements of the counts and shows why each has been proven by a preponderance of the evidence (or, if you’re the defense, why any given element has NOT been proven). Then the defense gives their closing argument, and then the plaintiff gives their rebuttal (a shorter argument countering the defense’s main points).

After this, the jurors are separated from the alternates by lot, and the jurors are dismissed to deliberate. During deliberation, they can review the evidence to their hearts’ content and even send out questions to ask the judge.

After deliberation is over, the jurors are brought back to give their verdict. The foreman (or foreperson) is the juror who announces the verdict.

Note: some trials may be bifurcated. For example, in a breach of contract action (action is another word for lawsuit, basically, and “cause of action” is the reason why you’re suing; e.g. “breach of contract” is a cause of action), the first half of the trial will be to decide whether there was a contract that was breached, and only after that trial and only if that trial decided “yep the contract was breach” do you move on to the second half, where you prove damages (what harm the plaintiff experienced as a result of the defendant’s breach of contract).

Whichever side loses might file an appeal, which sends the case up to the appellate court to determine if the trial judge got something wrong. An appellate case does not involve calling witnesses; instead, the only things the appellate judges can consider is whatever has been preserved in the record (a written transcript of what happened at trial + admitted evidence). The appellate court might affirm the trial court (basically “Yeah you got it right”) or overturn it, or even affirm in part and overturn in part.

(Note: in a criminal case, the prosecution can't appeal a loss due to double jeopardy; see below on that. But the defense can file an appeal.)

So that’s basically your standard civil case, from start to finish!

CRIMINAL PROCEDURE: INVESTIGATION

There are two categories of note: pre-trial and trial. Trial is basically the same as in the civil case (jury selection, opening statements, examination of witnesses, closing arguments), so I’ll focus on pre-trial.

Please be aware: in light of the current state of the US, some of this might be saddening, angering, or otherwise triggering to read. I fully acknowledge that not all police actually follow the rules as outlined here. However, reading this might help you be more aware of your own rights. That said, please do not read if you would find this section upsetting. This is why I split the “investigation” section from the “adjudication” section.

Pre-trial criminal procedure is ruled primarily by the 4th Amendment of the US Constitution, which guarantees US citizens the right from unreasonable searches and seizures by police. The teeth of the 4th Amendment (and the 5th, 6th, and 14th Amendments) comes from the exclusionary rule. The exclusionary rule holds that any evidence collected in violation of these amendments is “excluded” and cannot be used to prosecute a defendant.

What is reasonable for police depends largely how much information they have that you are engaged in criminal activity. The lowest recognized level is reasonable suspicion. Reasonable suspicion is more than just a hunch or a guess – it requires specific and articulable facts that you (or your things) are involved in a crime. Facts that could give rise to reasonable suspicion are: evading the police, nervous behavior or furtive movements, association with criminal organizations, matching a description of a recent 911 tip, and traffic violations. (Note: being in a “high crime” area is a factor that’s not enough by itself, and could be enough with other factors. Yes, that’s racist.) The next level up is probable cause: a fair probability under the totality of the circumstances that a crime is afoot and this this person or thing is involved.

Now, what can a police officer with reasonable suspicion actually do? They can stop and frisk you and they can do an inventory or administrative search. What can a police officer with probable cause do? They can arrest you and do a full search. (Note: if they have probable cause + “overall reasonableness” they can intrude by “extraordinary means.” Examples of extraordinary intrusions are: unannounced entry into home, entry into a home or office without a warrant, physical penetration of the body, and deadly force.)

However, despite all this, the 4th Amendment does not apply unless the police actually searched or seized you or your things. So it’s crucial to be able to define and identify searches and seizures. A search is when a government agent uses a sense to get information. Yes, all the senses. The lowest level of search is the stop (a “seizure” of a person). A stop occurs when a reasonable person would not feel free to terminate the encounter. If a reasonable person would feel free to leave, then it’s just an encounter, not a stop. Note, however, that if police take advantage of a confining situation (like cornering people on a bus), that’s not a stop unless the police created the confining situation. However, ways that police CAN stop you are: show of authority to which you as the citizen submit, intentional touch (no matter how slight), and taking and withholding an item you need (like your wallet or a transportation ticket).

Other information to know about stops: officers are NOT required to inform you when you’re free to leave. They MAY ask about immigration. (Yeah. Yikes.)

How do you know when a stop has become an arrest? Consider these factors:

Duration of the stop

Level of intrusiveness (including dog sniffs that add to the time of the stop)

Drawing a weapon

Handcuffing

Placing you in a squad car

Moving you

Next level up: frisk. A frisk occurs when an officer has already stopped you and now pats down the outer clothing (and may include groping). A frisk requires, first, that the stop preceding the frisk is legitimate, and, second, reasonable suspicion that the suspect is armed with a weapon. Anything the officer can tell by plain feel is contraband may be seized. If the officer has to manipulate the thing they’re touching to figure out what it is, then they’ve gone beyond the scope of a frisk and they can’t admit whatever they find against you.

If the search reveals contraband, then there’s probable cause to seize the contraband. And to seize the person.

Which brings us to: arrest. An arrest is the ultimate seizure of a person. It requires probable cause. Arrest also allows an officer to do a full search incident to arrest, which means the officer can search your person to make sure you aren’t armed. This includes going into your pockets, which is why it’s more intrusive than a frisk. An officer can also search the area around you; however, the search can’t extend beyond your wingspan: the area you can reach with your hands. (In a car, your wingspan includes the area of the car you’re in, e.g. the driver’s area or the passenger area. Except they can’t search your car after they’ve removed you from it UNLESS they are searching for evidence of the crime for which you were arrested in the first place – so, like, if you’re arrested for a traffic violation, there’s no point in searching the car, but if you’re arrested for suspicion of drug use, they can search the car because you might have drugs or paraphernalia in the car. A search of the trunk requires separate probable cause.) Note: if an officer issues a citation, the interaction is terminated, and they can’t then do a full search.

Really, really, really bad news: if an officer has probable cause, the officer is allowed to use pretext to make an arrest. So for example, a racist cop might arrest a Black man purely because of racism, not because this particular officer actually cared about probable cause that the Black man was engaged in crime. But as long as the probable cause exists, it can be used as a pretext for the arrest.

Okay, but what about search of a place? A search of a place is not subject to the 4th Amendment at all unless there is both: 1) a subjective expectation of privacy and 2) an objective expectation of privacy. Subjective means the property owner actually expects privacy (as indicated by taking steps to make something private; leaving your windows open shows you don’t have a subjective expectation of privacy with regard to anything that can be seen through it). Objective means we as society recognize this as a valid thing to keep private (so, like, even if you subjectively feel that anything on your roof should be private, there’s no objective privacy because we as society recognize that it’s perfectly normal for people to see things on your roof). Also, if you knowingly turn something over to a third party, you have legally demonstrated that you don’t have a subjective expectation of privacy. This is why, for example, the information contained on an envelope is not private, whereas the things inside the envelope are. Also, note: police don’t have to avert their eyes from something the public can see. There’s a twist with technology, though. The general rule is, police can’t use technology that a regular citizen can’t. So police can use, for example, binoculars, but they can’t use, like, thermal imaging searches (without a warrant) since most of us don’t walk around with thermal imaging devices.

A more modern twist is the mosaic rule. What if police can collect enough disparate data about you to form a mosaic? Like by looking at cell site data, tracking your GPS, etc.? Is that okay? Not if: a) the data was collected individually and then added together; b) you surrendered it passively; and c) the data collection is so pervasive that it can’t be said that you knowingly assumed the risk of its collection. So no, police can’t look at your GPS data, even if it all goes through third parties at some point, because each blip is separate, you didn’t intentionally give anyone your GPS data, and almost everyone has GPS such that it’s not reasonable to say people sit down and think “Hmm, how can this data be used against me?”

Another important thing to keep in mind is the importance of warrants. The 4th Amendment includes the warrant requirement. A valid warrant for search or seizure (including arrest) must be issued by a neutral and detached magistrate and describe with particularity the place, person, or thing to be searched/seized. Also, it’s important to note that warrants can’t be stale, which happens if too much time has passed between the alleged criminal activity and the issuance of a warrant.

In practice, prosecutors submit an affidavit of probable cause in which the cop explains why they think a warrant should be issued. Based on that, and that alone, the judge determines whether the warrant should be issued. However, defendants can challenge a warrant that they think is insufficient (or that they think was issued by a biased magistrate) at a Franks hearing. HOWEVER, even if you can prove that cops lied in an affidavit, the warrant might still be valid unless the lies were necessary to the issuance of the warrant. Nowadays, there are apps that let prosecutors send warrants straight to a judge’s phone to be signed, which means prosecutors can get a warrant signed, like, at midnight or something as long as a judge is awake, instead of waiting for business hours. These are called telephonic warrants.

Note: even with a warrant, officers can’t just break into your home or office. They have to announce themselves first – UNLESS: 1) you’re seeking a person and there’s a high likelihood the person will run; 2) you’re seeking evidence and the evidence is evanescent; or 3) there’s a danger to either the officers or the public.

Also: if officers have a valid warrant to search your home or office, they can usually go ahead and detain you, since a detainment is considered a lesser intrusion then the search.

Now, once the officers are in the home or office, what can they do? They can search only in paces where the thing (or person) they’re seeking could reasonably be. So if they’re searching for, like, drugs, they can search basically anywhere. If they’re searching for, like, a giant gun, they can’t go poking through tiny little drawers. But they can also seize anything in plain view: anything they can see (without having to move anything else) and immediately recognize as contraband.

Can officers ever intrude in your home or office without a warrant? Yes, if there’s an exigency. Valid exigencies are: Risk of fleeing felon (gotta go in here to catch the guy about to run away); Hot pursuit of felon (guy we’re already chasing runs into a house); Safety (there’s a bomb in there); Evanescent evidence (like, we’re looking for tiny little papers and we just heard someone flush the toilet three times in a row), and a catch-all category of any other type of emergency.

If there’s no exigency, and no warrant yet, officers might “freeze” the situation by staying outside the building or walking alongside a person until they get a warrant.

Now let’s transition from search and seizure to interrogation. This is where more of your rights as a suspect/defendant kick in, starting with your rights regarding confession.

Probably the most famous rights are your Miranda rights. The trick is, Miranda rights only apply if there is custodial interrogation. This means you have to be both 1) in custody, and 2) being interrogated. The test for whether you’re in custody is: would a reasonable person in your position feel they were not free to terminate the encounter? This is an objective test, so it doesn’t matter what you actually feel; what matters is what a reasonable person would feel. (That said, your age does matter, as does difficulty with the English language. But other things that I think should matter, like prior bad experience with police, don’t necessarily matter.) Factors that suggest custody are: whether the atmosphere is “police-dominated,” the location of interrogation (home suggests not custody; police car or station says probably custody); whether you transported yourself to the interrogation or if police brought you; whether you are allowed friends/family/“allies” in the room with you; your age; whether you were threatened with prosecution; the time (generally, 2 hours suggests custody); whether the questioning is aggressive/deceptive/accusatory; and whether you are arrested immediately after interrogation.

The test for whether you’re being interrogated is: did the police use words or actions (other than those normally attendant to arrest/custody) that OFFICERS should have known were reasonably likely to elicit an incriminating response? So this is a subjective test from the officer’s point of view. However, if an officer confronts you with potential evidence of a crime, even without speaking, that can sometimes count as interrogation.

Now let’s say you are in custody and you are being interrogated. What do your Miranda rights mean? If you are being custodially interrogated, you must be advised of your right to silence and your right to counsel during interrogation. If you invoke silence, the outcome is: police must immediately cease questioning you, but can resume questioning you after a “significant pause,” and can also question you on a different matter. If you invoke your right to counsel, police must immediately cease questioning you and can’t resume questioning until either your attorney arrives or you reinitiate conversation. Note: just staying silent is not enough to invoke silence. Also note: saying vaguely “Should I get a lawyer?” or even “I think I want a lawyer” is not enough to invoke counsel. To avoid confusion, your statement must be clear and unambiguous; best to clearly say: “I am invoking my right to silence and I am invoking my right to counsel.” You can, however, waive your Miranda rights as long as the waiver is knowing, intelligent, and voluntary. Meaning you must have been given your Miranda rights, understood them, and then waive your rights clearly (by talking) without having been coerced. The burden (or responsibility) is on the government to demonstrate that you waived your rights.

In addition to Miranda, you can also challenge the admissibility of a statement under the Due Process clause of the Constitution if you can demonstrate that coercive conduct overwhelmed you, leading you to make a coerced statement. (Note: this applies even if you’re not in custody.)

And then, of course, there’s the 5th Amendment. The Fifth Amendment holds that you can’t be made to incriminate yourself. But you can only assert the Fifth Amendment if: 1) you are subject to government questioning; 2) you have a real and substantial fear that the testimony will incriminate you; and 3) you actually assert the privilege by refusing to testify. (If you testify, you’ve waived the right.)

Police might off you immunity in exchange for your waiver of the Fifth Amendment. Use/testimonial immunity prohibits the use of your testimony (or any evidence derived from that testimony, like if the police use your statement to inform their investigation) against you; however, the government can still prosecute you based on other evidence as long as that other evidence has no connection to the testimony you gave under use immunity. Transactional immunity is much stronger because means police can’t prosecute you at all on the subject of the testimony. (So Ray Nadeem testified under use immunity, meaning if police found evidence unconnected to his testimony showing his work with Fisk, they could still prosecute him for conspiracy and other things. But if he’d been given transactional immunity, all his interactions with Fisk would be shielded.)

And then we get the 6th Amendment. Not to be confused with your right to counsel under Miranda, which kicks in with custodial interrogation, the 6th Amendment right to counsel only kicks in once the formal adversarial process has been initiated by formal charges, an indictment, arraignment, or a preliminary hearing. However, the 6th Amendment does allow you to kinda look back in time to see whether you had an attorney at all “critical stages,” potentially including custodial interrogation.

Now, if evidence is collected in violation of the above rights, that evidence is considered “fruit of the poisonous tree” and must be excluded, unless the police can show inevitable discovery: that the evidence would inevitably have been discovered even without using unconstitutionally-obtained testimony.

But let’s say the police have enough evidence (or think they do) to formally charge you. They will then book or process you. This is where police get certain information out of you, take mug shots, etc.

Now what?

CRIMINAL PROCEDURE: ADJUDICATION

If the case is federal, not state (like, the crime occurred across state lines or on federal land), you’ll get a grand jury. The prosecution presents their case to the grand jury, and if the grand jury is convinced there’s enough evidence to go forward, the “target” of the grand jury (who doesn’t even know it’s happening) will be indicted. Note: the prosecution has no obligation to submit exculpatory evidence (evidence that suggests the defendant’s innocence), and the defendant has no right to counsel at the grand jury, or even the right to be present.

If it’s a state crime, you’ll be arraigned, usually within 24 hours of being charged. At the arraignment, the judge reads the charges against you and informs you of the maximum potential penalties, and you announce whether to plea guilty or not guilty. A guilty plea waives your right to a trial as you admit to guilt. (Note: an Alford plea means you admit that the prosecution could prove your guilt, but doesn’t admit that you actually are guilt.) A not guilty plea preserves all your rights and means your case will continue through discovery to trial, similar to in a civil case. If you plea guilty, a date will be set for sentencing, when you will receive your actual sentence.

Regardless of whether you plea guilty or not guilty, depending on the severity of the crime, you might be taken into custody in jail. You can try to bail out of jail by giving the court a certain amount of money in exchange for your temporary freedom. Bail hearings consider whether you are a “flight risk” (meaning you’re not likely to return for other hearings or for trial) or whether you are a danger to the community. If you’re a flight risk or a danger, you probably won’t get bail, or it’ll be incredibly high.

Discovery is mostly similar to what you see in civil trials, except certain evidence is required to be turned over to you by the prosecution: this is Brady material. Brady material is evidence that is favorable (to you as a defendant) and material to the case (evidence that creates a reasonable probability of a different outcome at trial). Unfortunately, Brady evidence by the government only violates Due Process if the government acted in bad faith.

At any point even up to during trial, you can take a plea deal. A plea deal is an offer by the prosecution to potentially dismiss certain charges (or enhancements, which increase the underlying sentence because you’re a repeat offender or you used a deadly weapon or for various other reasons) and argue for certain lower penalties in exchange for your plea of guilt.

The Sixth Amendment also offers you another right: the right to a speedy trial. In New York, you must have a trial for a felony within six months of your not guilty plea, or else your right to a speedy trial has been violated – unless delays are your fault. (Like if hearings keep getting delayed because you fail to show up.)

When you’re at trial, you again have the Sixth Amendment right to counsel. Your counsel must be effective; otherwise, you have a claim for ineffective assistance of counsel. To prove ineffective assistance of counsel, you must prove both that: 1) your lawyer was ineffective (fell below reasonable standards); and 2) you were prejudiced (the outcome would’ve been different otherwise). Note that courts assume attorneys are effective.

Another key part of a criminal trial is the Confrontation Clause of the U.S. Constitution. This clause gives you the right to “confront” witnesses who present testimonial evidence against you – not testimonial broadly in that it’s “testimony,” but specifically in that it’s a statement made in a situation where a witness would expect it to be used as evidence in a criminal trial. So, like, a 911 call is not testimonial, but a statement made to a police tip line is testimonial.

If you go to trail and win, then you can’t be tried again for the same offense (by the same “sovereign”) under the double jeopardy rule. Sovereign in this context refers to the government. So if you commit a crime that’s both a state and a federal crime, the state prosecutor and the federal prosecutor can both prosecute you without violating double jeopardy.

If you go to trial and lose, you’ll go to sentencing. At sentencing, the prosecutor will argue for a certain sentence, and the defense attorney will argue for a certain sentence, and you’ll have the right to make a statement as well. Also, any victims (who have the right to be present) also have the right to make a victim’s impact statement. Then the judge imposes the sentence within the maximum confines of the law. A sentence will usually include, at minimum, a certain amount of time to be spent in jail or prison, as well as a fine. However, both the time incarcerated and the fine can be suspended. If the jail/prison time is suspended, you’ll be put on probation, where you can basically live normal life, except that any violation (any violation) of your probation will result in the imposition of your sentence. Your sentence might also include other fees to the court, restitution paid to your victim, certain limitations (like not being able to drive a vehicle) and certain mandates (like having to get a job).

If you go to trial and lose, you can appeal your sentence, which triggers the appeals process, but I honestly don’t know much more about the appellate process other than what was mentioned elsewhere in this document.

And I think that’s good enough for now on criminal procedure!

EVIDENCE

The rules of evidence are HARD, but knowing this stuff at just a basic level will absolutely set your story apart from others. In my opinion, evidence issues are where you get to have a lot of fun and add more conflict and twists to your story, instead of just mechanically marching through trial procedure. So here goes!

Again, evidence can be, basically, things (objects, documents, recordings, etc.) and testimony. Evidence can also be direct(like footage of someone doing an act) or circumstantial (like bank statements showing the defendant deposited a large amount of cash the day after the alleged robbery). CIRCUMSTANCIAL EVIDENCE IS TOTALLY VALID AND YOU CAN TOTALLY WIN A CASE, EVEN A CRIMINAL CASE, ON CIRCUMSTANCIAL EVIDENCE. PLEASE DON’T HAVE A CHARACTER SAY “OH NO IT’S ONLY CIRCUMSTANCIAL EVIDENCE” OR I WILL CRY.

Evidence must be admissible in order to be considered by the jury. Inadmissible evidence may not be considered by the jury. If the evidence is inadmissible for ANY REASON, it’s out. That’s it, the end.

First, let’s talk briefly about things. Say you’re the defense attorney and you want to admit into evidence security footage that shows your client was nowhere at the scene of the alleged crime. Say you didn’t admit it prior to trial in a motion in limine, and want to admit it at trial instead. You gotta go through some steps:

Show the evidence to the opposing party (the prosecutor) before the trial

At trial, call a witness to the stand who can talk about the footage (ideally someone responsible for the evidence, aka a custodian, but anyone who can speak to the footage’s authenticity will do)

Ask permission to show a short clip of the video so the witness knows what you’re talking about

Ask, “Do you recognize this video?” (the witness should say “yes”)

Ask, “How do you recognize this video?” (the witness will explain they’ve seen it before)

Ask, “Is this a true and correct copy of this video?” (the witness should say yes)

Ask the judge to admit the evidence

[the judge will ask the other side if they have any objections, which you’ll have to deal with it]

If it’s admitted, ask for permission to publish the evidence to the jury (until you do this, the jury will not be allowed to see the evidence)

And ta-da!

Now I will focus on witness testimony because that’s the easiest example for applying all the crazy rules. At trial, a witness is calledby one side. The witness then takes the stand (sits in a special chair) and is sworn in (“do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?” “I do”), and then proceeds to testify under oath. Note: the witness can’t just start talking; they have to answer the questions posed by the attorneys.

Now let’s explore the admissibility of a given “piece” of testimony (a statement). Let’s say you’re the prosecution, and you call a witness who testifies: “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’.”

The threshold question is relevance: is the statement relevant? (“Objection, relevance” or “Objection, 4.01.”) Relevant evidence is that which makes a fact in consequence more likely than not. (Facts in consequence are ones that relate to either a) the legal/factual issues of the case, or b) the credibility of witnesses.) Irrelevant evidence is always inadmissible. This statement may be highly relevant if the store in question was robbed on June 16 and the case is about a robbery at the store; it may be completely irrelevant if the case is about an assault on a totally different day.

But just because evidence is relevant doesn’t mean it’s admissible. For example, the evidence is excluded if its probative value (aka relevance) is outweighed by prejudice, confusion, delay, or unfair surprise. (e.g. “Objection, more [prejudicial than probative]” or “Objection, 4.07.”) This is a balancing test which means the simple fact that either probative value or prejudicial effect may exist doesn’t resolve the issue; the judge has to ask whether the probative value is OUTWEIGHED by the prejudice. For example, “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’” may be a little prejudicial to the defendant, but the probative value is quite high, so it would be admissible. (But if the statement is something like, “Three years ago, I heard the defendant say he kicks puppies for fun” – that’s highly prejudicial and has zero probative value to the case, so it would be inadmissible.)

But what if our witness has a really sketchy past? Introducing the terrifying world of character evidence (rule 4.11), perhaps the only set of rules that rivals hearsay rules in terms of complexity. Briefly put: evidence that your witness did something bad in the past is NOT admissible to prove propensity (e.g. that they have a “propensity” for bad stuff). This actually comes up most often with defendants (like, if this defendant is charged with bank robber I can’t admit evidence that he was convicted of bank robbery before just to show that “Hey guys c’mon this dude is obviously a bank robber”). But prior bad acts ARE admissible to prove…literally anything other than propensity. Like knowledge. (For example, I can’t say the defendant robbed a bank before and must therefore be a bank robber, but I can say he robbed a bank with super high-tech security, so he has the knowledge required to rob this OTHER bank with the same or similar super high-tech security.)

Note: a fun way to write evidentiary sparring is as follows: Attorney A brings up the prior bad act (“Isn’t it true you robbed a bank before?”) to which Attorney B shouts “Objection! Rule 4.11!” to which Attorney A fires back with, “This isn’t propensity, this is for knowledge,” and after explaining why, Attorney B insists, “This is still inadmissible under 4.07!” and now we jump back to the more-probative-than-___ balancing test. It’s super fun. (Seriously. Fun.)

Now, our statement may be probative, and its probative value might outweigh the risk of prejudice or other problems, but it’s still not automatically admissible. There are several other categories of rules, all of which could exclude it:

- Privileges (like, again, attorney-client or doctor-patient) – but PLEASE NOTE that privileges are not absolute. This means privileged evidence is not guaranteed to be inadmissible; it can be admitted if it is important enough, like if there’s no other way this issue can be explored at trial. So without getting into spousal vs marital privilege (hmu if you want to know the difference but it’s deathly technical), let me just say that: sure, Matt and Foggy can totally get married and that makes it HARDER for anyone to ask Foggy to testify against Matt, but it doesn’t guarantee that Foggy would NEVER be made to testify against Matt. Their spousal/marital privilege is not absolute. Sorry to crush your dreams.

- Witnesses (which I’ll explain in more detail below)

- And the infamous hearsay (which I’ll explain in more detail below).

So, witness rules. Rule 6.07 is a good one to know: lay witnesses (who aren’t experts) can only testify to FACTS about which they have personal knowledge. If they start giving opinions, their opinions are inadmissible (“Objection, speculation” or “Objection, 6.07”) – unless their opinion is 1) rationally based on their perception; 2) within the limit of their common experiences; and 3) would help the finder of fact to either understand the witness’ testimony or determine a fact in issue. (So if you’re trying to admit the lay witness’ opinion, you’d ask the question to elicit the testimony, and the other side would object under 6.07, and you’d fire back with 7.03). However, remember that expert witnesses ARE allowed to speak outside their personal knowledge and give opinions – as long as the expert is properly qualified as an expert (under 7.01). This qualification usually happens in a motion in limine outside the presence of the jury. Also note: New York has special extra opinion rules for certain topics like abuse and sexual assault.

Anyway, because “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’” is not an opinion, your witness can make the statement even if the witness is a lay witness as long as foundation is laid/established to show that the witness was in fact within earshot when the defendant made this statement.

Moving on. What if your witness gave a statement to police a few weeks before trial, in which your witness said “On June 16, I heard the defendant say he was going to do nothing but play video games”? Oh no. This is a prior inconsistent statement (rule 6.15) because it’s a statement made prior to trial that is inconsistent with the statement made at trial. Inconsistent statements can be used to impeach a witness. (Impeachment is basically anything that questions the witness’ credibility.) Once your witness says “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’” you have “opened the door” to the defense using the inconsistent statement. Note: in a civil case, the inconsistent statement can be used for the truth asserted in the inconsistent statement (e.g. that the defendant said he was going to do nothing but play video games), but in a criminal case, the inconsistent statement can ONLY be used to say “Hey this witness said two contradictory things, maybe you should not trust them.”

What if there are no inconsistent statements, but about your witness’ sketchy past? Well, whatever is sketchy in the witness’ past is only admissible if it relates to TRUTHFULNESS. Crimes of dishonesty (like fraud or perjury) are good for that; other stuff like theft is not. (Rule 6.17). Note: this is similar to 4.11, but not the same, because this is only about truthfulness, not knowledge or propensity or other stuff.

Okay, moving on. Let’s talk hearsay, the thing that terrifies law students everywhere! Hearsay is an “out-of-court statement given for the truth of the matter asserted.” Out-of-court means it’s a statement that was made by someone who wasn’t on the witness stand at the time; “given for the truth of the matter asserted” means you (the person introducing the statement) is using the statement to prove what the statement says. The general rule is that you CANNOT admit an out-of-court statement given for the truth of the matter asserted (Rule 8.01). Also keep in mind: the person who said the out-of-court statement is the declarant.

So if your witness says, “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’” note that not all of that statement is hearsay. The hearsay is “I am going to the store.” See why? Your witness is on the stand, so what your witness says is not out-of-court until the witness quotes (or references) a DIFFERENT statement made outside of court. Your witness can say all sorts of stuff about what your witness saw the defendant do on June 16 – the only thing your witness can’t do is repeat what the defendant SAID. At least…not if you, the attorney, are using the statement to prove the truth asserted in the statement. For example, you can admit “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’” to show that your witness was around the defendant on June 16 or that the defendant had plans on June 16 or…anything else you can think of, really. The only thing you CAN’T do is admit “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’” to prove that the defendant actually went to the store on June 16. Also: in the example of your witness saying “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘I am going to the store’” the declarant is the defendant.

Or…can you? And here we get to tackle all the exceptions to the hearsay rule. Check them out on the above-mentioned guide-to-evidence website; I’ll just pull out a few fun ones.

Co-conspirator’s statement! (Rule 8.09.) Say this robbery at the store is actually a conspiracy (meaning multiple people agreed to commit the crime of robbery). Say you call your witness to say “On June 16, I heard Joe [not the defendant] say, ‘I am going to the store with [the defendant].” Now you can admit Joe’s hearsay statement (“I am going to the store with [the defendant]”) as long as: 1) Joe (the declarant) is a co-conspirator of the defendant; 2) Joe made the statement in furtherance of the conspiracy (e.g. to help the conspiracy); and 3) Joe made the statement in the course of the conspiracy (e.g. not after the fact when the conspiracy was over). Ta-da.

Statement against interest! (Rule 8.11) Broadly speaking, this is pretty simple: you just argue that the statement is “against the interest” of the declarant such that the declarant would not make the statement if it weren’t true because…well, it’s dumb to lie against your own interest. (Silly examples are, “Yesterday I stole money” or “I would love to kill someone.”) However, in a criminal trial, there are some fun twists to the rule in 8.11.2.

Dying declaration! (Rule 8.15) In New York, this exception ONLY applies in a homicide case. An out-of-court statement is admissible under this exception if: 1) the declarant genuinely believed they were imminently about to die, and 2) the statement concerns the cause/circumstances of death. (Note: it’s not required that the declarant ACTUALLY dies, as long as the declarant THINKS they’ll die.) (So is Ray Nadeem’s “dying declaration” admissible? Um, not all of it. Yes, he genuinely believes he’s imminently about to die, but a lot of what he says goes beyond the cause/circumstances of death.)

Excited utterance! (Rule 8.17) Hearsay is admissible if the statement: 1) was made while the declarant was “excited” (scared, thrilled, surprised, angry, etc.) and 2) is about the exciting event. Like if your witness says, “On June 16, I heard the shop attendant scream ‘That guy’s got a gun!’”

Forfeiture by wrongdoing! (Rule 8.19) Hearsay is admissible against a certain party if: 1) that party tried to prevent the declarant from testifying, and 2) the party’s actions were a significant cause of the witness’ decision not to testify. You see this a lot in domestic violence cases, where a defendant threatens the victim to scare the victim out of testifying. If this happens, you can use the victim’s statements even if the statements are “out-of-court” because the victim never takes the stand.

Present sense impression! (Rule 8.29) Basically, hearsay is admissible if the statement was made either describing something or shortly afterwards. Like if your witness says, “On June 16, I heard Joe say, ‘Look, [the defendant] is going to the store.’” The idea is that the declarant is basically narrating something as it happens, without enough time between the event and the statement for the declarant to think about lying.

Prompt outcry! (Rule 8.37) As far as I know, this rule is unique to New York, and I love it. It’s a specific exception carved out for out-of-court statements showing that a victim of sexual assault promptly reported, to be used to show: 1) that the victim is credible; and/or 2) to explain the investigative process.

State of mind! (Rule 8.41) Hearsay is admissible if the statement is made by the declarant showing how they are thinking or feeling at the time. Also includes physical state. For example, “On June 16, I heard the defendant say, ‘my stomach hurts.’” Also includes stuff like intent or plan (e.g. “On June 16, I heard the defendant say ‘I will go to the store’”) but you can’t use it to prove that he actually DID go to the store; only that he planned to or wanted to.

And, again, there are so many other exceptions. These are just some of my favorites

And that’s probably more than you ever need to know about evidence. Now you can have fun throwing the rules around to admit/exclude stuff.

TRICKS FOR MAKING TRIAL SCENES COOL

Here are some random tidbits to make your trial scenes stand out (in the right ways, and not stand out in bad ways):

Even when lawyers are arguing with each other, if they’re in court, they argue to the judge. Instead of saying “No, you’re wrong,” they say, “Your Honor, opposing counsel is wrong.”

Lawyers generally can’t approach the judge or a witness on the witness stand without permission. They should ask, “May I approach?” to approach the judge or “May I approach the witness?” to approach the witness.

In court, lawyers should refer to the judge as “Your Honor.” Some lawyers just call the judge “Judge” but in my opinion, that comes off as too familiar and potentially disrespectful.

A case should have a theme that the jury can easily understand.

Lawyers can totally use powerpoint presentations in their opening statements and closing arguments.

One mistake that will stand out if you include it in a fic is having either side in a criminal trial talk about penalties. Penalties for a criminal conviction are decided at sentencing. Mentioning penalties at trial can lead to a mistrial.

Another mistake that will stand out is having lawyers debate the admissibility of evidence in front of the jury. It’s improper for the jury to be exposed in any way to evidence that may not be legally admissible, and it’s improper for the jury to consider legal arguments. So if one side objects to evidence, they should simply say “Objection, [brief reason or rule].” Launching into their argument is called giving a “speaking objection” and it can get you in trouble. Sometimes just the brief rule or reason (like “Objection, relevance”) is enough if the problem is obvious. But if a lawyer wants to signal to the judge that they have an argument they want to give, they should say, “Objection, [brief reason or rule]. May I proffer?” Only when the judge says “Yes” can they make their argument. Before they do so, either the jury will be dismissed, or the attorneys will be invited to stand in front of the judge, and the clerk will hit a button that fills the rest of the room with a buzzing sound so no one else can hear what’s going on. (Again: if the judge AGREES with your objection, your objection is sustained. If the judge DISAGREES with your objection, your objection is overruled.)

A good objection argument has the following format: “[evidence to be proffered], [conclusion], [rule], [application of the rule to the evidence].” (Example is: “Your Honor, if permitted to testify, this witness will say she heard the defendant say, ‘I will go to the store’ on June 16. This evidence is admissible under Rule 4.01. Rule 4.01 states that relevant evidence, which is evidence with a tendency to make a fact in consequence more or less likely, is admissible. This statement is relevant because it makes it more likely that the defendant did in fact go to the store on June 16, which is a fact in consequence because the store was robbed on June 16, and this case alleges that the defendant participated in the robbery.” See how easy that is to follow? (I hope, lol.) However, most attorneys don’t argue so clearly, so it’s not necessarily realistic to write it that way. Unless you want to point out that your attorney is particularly precise/experienced.)

LAW SCHOOL STUFF

In the US, law school is usually 3 years long, though some people graduate faster by taking classes over the summer and others graduate later by going part-time.

Law school requires an undergraduate degree. So you’ve got usually four years getting an undergrad degree (like English or political science – probably the most common degrees for lawyers, but please note that “pre-law” is NOT an actual degree).

At some point prior to admission to law school, you have to take the LSAT (the entrance exam for law school). You don’t study for the LSAT; you practice for the LSAT. That’s because the LSAT is skills-based, not knowledge-based. It tests reading comprehension, logical reasoning, and analytical reasoning. Reading comprehension asks you to read a passage and identify main points, styles of argumentation, types of evidence, etc. Verbal reasoning basically does the same thing, just with shorter passages. Analytical reasoning tests your ability to problem-solve with the infamous logic games. Google them and you’ll see why they’re scary for most people.

With your undergrad transcripts, GPA, LSAT score, and personal statement, you can now apply for law school. If you’re a desirable candidate, you can expect to get scholarships, which is awesome.

Now, let’s say you get into law school. What’s that like? Stressful for sure. Also a lot like high school. You’ve got a relatively small group of people all taking the same classes together. Cliques and rivalries form. Study groups appear and then dissipate. Some schools get vicious (there are infamous stories of people stealing books from the library right before finals), but most schools these days try to encourage a more cooperative experience. That said, there will always be “gunners” which are the people who can be counted on to always want to answer questions in class. They usually sit in the front row. They are usually incredibly obnoxious. (I maintain that I was not a gunner because although I always wanted to answer questions and usually at in the front row, I wasn’t actually obnoxious? I hope???) Often, everyone thinks gunners will be top of the class, but almost invariably the top of the class is some person in the back who never says a word all year unless directly called on.

When you start law school, you are known as a 1L or “one-L” because it’s your first year. During your first year, you have little choice in what classes you take. Classes are usually those that will be tested on the bar exam (the licensing exam; more on that later). Check out this website for a roadmap of the Columbia 1L (and 2L and 3L) experience: https://www.law.columbia.edu/community-life/student-life/roadmaps.

Traditionally and generally speaking, the only law school classes that involve “papers” are your LP classes (Legal Practice Workshop classes) which teach legal writing. Students in these classes might have to write briefs or memos (short analyses of a case, written as if to a supervising attorney). Additionally, law school classes traditionally and generally only have one exam: the final exam. Yes, this means that aside from any points you get from attendance/participation, your ENTIRE grade rests on one (1) exam, which is usually closed-book and can last about 3 hours, comprised of one or two essay questions. You’re lucky if you get a midterm to give your GPA a buffer. (So no matter how much angst Matt and Foggy go through in law school, they CANNOT MISS A FINAL OR THEY WILL FAIL THE CLASS AND HAVE TO RETAKE IT.) That said, more modern-thinking professors recognize the issues with this approach, and may offer other tests, quizzes, and projects. In which case sure, let the angst get in the way of finals.

The bulk of your work in law school is reading textbooks full primarily of cases with little helpful explanations. It’s up to you to pull the important things out of cases (“important things” being relevant facts, the holding, and the reasoning behind the holding, and sometimes interesting bits from the dissent). Good luck doing that when the case is from the 1800s.

Whatever you pull out of textbooks is helpful for two reasons: prep for class, and prep for exams. Prep for class means knowing as much as you can about the cases so if you get called on, you can answer without everyone making fun of you. If the professor “cold calls,” that means they call on students in random order. Other professors might go alphabetically or have some other system. Professors in law school generally use the Socratic method of teaching, which means they teach through conversation. The questions are supposedly designed to make you think critically, rather than to make you look dumb. That’s up for debate.

Prep for exam means building an outline. An outline is your synthesis of all the most important cases. Though you usually can’t have your outline with you during the exam, the process of making it helps you not only review information but figure out how it all fits together (since law is notorious for having weird exceptions and stuff that only applies in specific circumstances). You can also possibly borrow outlines from other students, and usually there are a few outlines floating around that some student four or five years ahead of you created—but the fact is, you probably won’t learn as well if you just copy someone else’s outline rather than building your own.

The week prior to finals is usually called “dead week” ostensibly because there are no classes but really because everyone is dead. Or in the library. Or dead in the library.

Also, you get spring break (a week), Thanksgiving break (a week in November for my non-US followers), and winter break (usually about three weeks from mid December to mid January), as well as summer break off.

After exams, rankings are posted. Everyone is ranked. Rankings are crucial in getting good externships during law school, and good jobs after law school. Top 10-15 are pretty much set to get clerkships if they want them (clerkships are, again, where you work for a judge for a year or so after law school). (Disclaimer: I wasn’t actually in the top 15% but idk my judge liked me.)

Note: applying for externships and jobs both pretty much involve submitting your transcript, résumé, letters of recommendation, and the big one: a writing sample. (Also: the importance of letters of recommendation is a great reason to visit office hours and befriend professors.)

While in law school, you might engage in extracurricular activities. Here’s what Columbia offers: https://www.law.columbia.edu/academics/experiential.

Note: technically, I think Columbia only offers “moot court” programs, rather than “mock trial” (or “trial team”). Moot court is appellate advocacy (where each side writes a brief and then gives an oral argument before a judge) whereas mock trial is trial advocacy (where each side gives opening statements, calls witnesses, and gives closing arguments). Appellate advocacy is great practice for appeals (obviously) and oral arguments at hearings, but mock trial is better practice for, well…trials. And in my humble opinion, having done both, mock trial is WAY more fun. So I personally choose to ignore reality and imagine that Matt and Foggy did mock trial instead of or in addition to moot court.

In a mock trial, you’re given a case file (sometimes just called a “packet”) which includes the civil or criminal complaint, witness statements or affidavits, and exhibits. Each team is responsible for knowing the packet inside and out and building their cases based on what’s contained inside. You’re not allowed to bring in extra information from the real world unless it’s common knowledge.

You’re also on a team, usually with just three other people. You must be prepared to present both sides of a case. For each side, two of you play attorneys and two of you play witnesses; you switch roles when you switch sides. (So Matt might be a prosecutor and a defense witness whereas Foggy would be a prosecution’s witness and a defense attorney.) There are two ways an individual can partner with a teammate: by being co-counsel or by being an attorney-witness pair. (So if Matt is a prosecutor and he calls Foggy as his witness [in that he direct-examines Foggy], Matt and Foggy would be an attorney-witness pair [and probably Foggy would be Matt’s defense attorney when the team switches to play defense]; alternatively, Matt and Foggy could both be prosecutors or both be defense attorneys, in which case they’d be co-counsel.)

Note: some mock trial competitions only have two competitors. Both teammates are co-counsel for both sides of the case, and the witnesses are played by volunteers. In this kind of competition, you only get about 15 minutes to “prep” your witness (whom you’ve never met) before the competition actually starts, unlike in the other version of mock trial, where your witness is a classmate with whom you’ve practiced for months. This version of mock trial is honestly a lot closer to real life, and could be a fun twist if you’re writing a mock trial fic.

Which , listen, academically speaking, mock trial was the highlight of my law school career. I absolutely love it. If you want to do a mock trial fic, PLEASE hit me up. I will gush about it.

While in law school, you can also get practical experience at clinics by helping real people in different areas. Here are Columbia’s clinics: https://www.law.columbia.edu/academics/experiential/clinics.

You can also do externships! Sadly, these are almost never paid. Here are Columbia’s externships: https://www.law.columbia.edu/academics/experiential/externships. Also, you don’t usually do internships or externships AFTER law school. So I choose to believe Matt and Foggy interned at L&Z in their 3L year.

Lots of law schools have something called “bar review” which just means everyone goes to a bar together and gets drunk. Clever, right? Yeah, law school is notorious for alcoholism. Actually, the whole legal profession is notorious for alcoholism.

At some point during or immediately after law school, you have to pass the MPRE, aka the ethics exam for lawyers. It’s a joke.

After completing 3 years of law school, next begins the worst month and a half of your life: studying for the bar exam. The bar exam allegedly tests minimum competence but that’s just dumb. The problem is, the bar tests many different areas of law even though you as a lawyer will certainly not practice in all of those areas in your life, and will certainly not practice all of them at once. Also, it’s dumb because most of the bar exam tests memorization, and although memorization is important, it’s far from the most important thing in the real practice of law. Unless you’re literally at trial or at a hearing, you can always look up a statute or cases; you don’t have to have it memorized. Here’s a breakdown of the components of the bar exam, including a fun (and by “fun” I mean “horrible”) schedule: https://www.newyorkbarexam.com/new-york-bar-exam-format/.

Anyway. The New York bar exam is widely known as one of the most difficult in the nation. It’s two days long. Oh, and results aren’t posted until 3-4 months afterwards (November if you take the July exam; May if you take the February exam). The waiting is torture. And the pass list is public, so everyone who knows you took the bar can see immediately whether you passed or not. Which obviously is not fun. If you fail, you can take it again. Downside: the bar exam is ridiculously expensive, both to take the test itself and to buy all the test prep materials because guess what, law school didn’t actually teach you all the absurdly technical things you’ll be tested on.

Actually, okay, look. If I’m being honest, I found the bar exam super fun, but that’s because I prepared well and don’t get test anxiety. It’s not impossible to have fun on the bar exam. Just…most people don’t. And the bar itself is still mostly stupid. Plus, you have to start applying like four months before you take it and the application process is huge and frustrating and made me cry.

Once you pass the bar, you are officially licensed to practice law in that state (or in any states with whom licensing is reciprocal). If you aren’t licensed to practice law…you can’t practice law. This includes giving legal advice of any kind to anyone.

Any kind of ethical infraction can be reported to the bar association in your state. For Matt and Foggy, that’s the New York Bar Association. If your misconduct is bad enough, you might lose your license and have to wait a while to try to get it back. Matt should totally have lost his license by now. So should Foggy, since ethical rules require Foggy to report known ethical violations of another lawyer (Matt). But anyone else could file a bar complaint against Matt and Foggy too, even including their own clients.

Even after law school, lawyers are required to take a certain number of credits of continuing education (referred to as CLEs). CLEs can be hyper legal-specific (“Here’s the breaking news in the world of patents and intellectual property law!”) or more about social issues (implicit biases, trauma-informed interviews, etc.). I haven’t done this yet, but a CLE could be a cool plot device for informing Matt and Foggy (and the readers) about some issue you happen to care about.

Day in the Life

If you’re wondering what our characters are up to on a normal day at the office, wonder no more!

A ton of legal work is reading. You have to read police reports, witness statements, depositions, affidavits, and motions and briefs filed by the opposing party. You also have to do legal research, which means reading statutes and case law.

Not technically reading, but lawyers also spend time reviewing other types of evidence, like pictures, video files, and audio files. (Sometimes this can be a hassle if technology decides not to cooperate.)

Generally, if you’re not reading, you’re probably writing. You might be busy writing questions for witnesses or an outline of an opening statement or closing argument, but the bulk of pre-trial work will be writing motions, replies, and responses.

Motions are documents filed with the court asking the court to do something. Replies respond to the other side’s motions. Responses reply to the other side’s reply. (I know that’s confusing.)

Three important motions to be aware of in a Daredevil fic are motions to: suppress, strike, and compel.

A motion to suppress is a motion asking the court to exclude evidence for Constitutional reasons: usually because the evidence was obtained in violation of the Fourth, Fifth, or Sixth Amendments.

A motion to strike is a motion asking the court to exclude evidence because the evidence violates a rule of evidence. For example, if the prosecution calls an expert to talk about the results of a test that was run (maybe a test to determine if the substance found with the defendant is an illicit substance), the defense will move to strike the testimony if the testimony violates Rule 702 (the standard for experts).

A motion to compel is a motion asking the court to force the other side to provide evidence. For example, the defense might move to compel the prosecution to provide statements made by the defendant.

Each motion will include a “fact” section (that lists the relevant facts of the case), a “standards” section (that sets forth the standard of review by an appellate court), and an “analysis” section that usually begins by outlining the law (statutes and case law) and then applies the law to the facts.

A lot of time spent in the office is spent outlining, researching, and drafting motions, replies, and responses.

Other time is spent discussing the case with colleagues. Other perspectives are always helpful for identifying holes in the case and more persuasive ways to argue the case.

Lawyers also will bring witnesses into the office to prep them (which basically means discussing with them the strengths and weaknesses of their testimony and running them through practice questions, particularly practice cross-examination questions). It’s important to note that prepping is not the same as coaching, which is unethical. Coaching is when a lawyer tells a witness what to say or what not to say.

CONCLUSION

Oh my gosh. I think that’s everything. Actually, I’m sure it’s not. I’ll be back to add stuff as I think of it. But for now, I hope this is helpful. Again, let me know if you have questions or want to know more about specific things, and I'll try to keep updating this as I think of other tidbits.

[shig-a-shig-ah]

Hey mootie I was wondering if your requests are still open, and you were comfortable if you could do Shiggy with a Trans man s/o who has a ridiculously high sex drive. Just nothing takes the edge off. Just the s/o can go several rounds and it concerns Shiggy. I don’t have anything else to add other than I just wanna get raw dogged by my husband 😔👊🏻 feel free to ignore if you don’t wanna do this. I just am thirsting hardcore for my fav villain boss again.

Moot I could never ignore this, I fucking love it too much and I am very flattered and touched you thought to ask me for this. I focused a little more on the ‘high sex drive’ and ‘raw dogged’ parts of this, but I think I got the concern in there too. I seriously had so much fun writing this one <333333333

» pairing: shigaraki tomura x transmasc!reader 

» cw: insatiable horniness, thigh riding, penetrative sex, some AFAB terminology, teeny-tiny mention of HRT. 18+, minors DNI. 

» a/n: I am not transmasc, exactly, just tried to draw on what I’ve heard from several transmasc people about being on T and being super horny all the time. So, please feel free to let me know if there’s any language I should adjust, or additional tags I should add that I didn’t think about! 

» wc: 1.3k 

The dream you were having is already slipping away when your eyes flutter open, but you make no effort to cling to it. The way you feel makes clear it was another one of those dreams, the ones you keep having that are yet another symptom of the hormones you're flooding your body with on a weekly basis. They leave your skin flushed and sweaty in the aftermath, that familiar ache pulsing at your center. Throbbing.

It's an arousal so overbearing that it borders on painful, has you curling into the pale-haired man sleeping next to you, fisting at his shirt as you slot yourself against the firm muscle of his thigh, your hips already grinding and tiny whimpers clawing their way up from your parched throat. Any self-consciousness you might feel about this—humping your swollen sex against his leg in the dead of night—is far outweighed by your desperate need for relief.

He starts to slowly stir as you increase the pace, chasing a release that will bring no more than a temporary reprieve at best, and that often offers no real reprieve at all. Somewhere beyond the heat roiling under your skin, you feel gloved fingers tracing over your back.  

"Again?" Tomura murmurs, his raspy voice thick with sleep and tinged with concern. You can only nod and mewl pathetically in response, not slowing even the slightest when he shifts, your chest pressing flat against his as he tugs you atop him. It's followed by his lips pressing soothingly against the crown of your head.

You use that change in position to your advantage, working yourself harder against him, burying your face in his torso to muffle your whines as you ride his thigh all the way to your peak, your own legs trembling as your core clenches around nothing.

Tomura doesn't wait for you to come down—knows you won't, not when you get like this. He's already using one hand to peel away your slick-soaked boxer briefs and shoving his own pants below the jut of his hips, just enough to guide you on to his waiting erection.

You're fluttering at the invasion the moment he's inside, rocking yourself back against his movements, and fuck, Tomura has mixed feelings about what the testosterone has done to you—can't help the pangs of concern and sympathy that plague him as you suffer through a seemingly unending haze of arousal—but he also loves this. Loves how desperate and needy it makes you for him, and how responsive you are to the simplest of touches.

You whimper when he slides a hand beneath your shirt to pinch lightly at one sensitive nipple, watching your face screw up into that expression he finds so becoming—your brows knitted and your lips twisted with frustration, choked sobs spilling out every time your stiff, puffy nub catches on his pelvis. It's as though you can barely handle the sensations, as though it's too much to take, but he knows it's what you need.

"Shh," he whispers, even as he thrusts up into you a little harder, angling his hips to stroke against that sweet spot inside in just the right way, obviously working to send you over the edge again. "You're okay, I've got you."

"Tomu—" your hands tangle into the white fluff his hair, your voice a pitiable pule "—Tomu, please. Need it so bad."

"I know, sweet boy. Don't worry, I'll take care of you." The softness in his voice has your heart squeezing, warmth spreading through your chest, because you know it's true. He's been so patient, even though you've been so shamefully demanding.

Even now he wastes no time making good on that promise, dipping his hand to roll your clit between deft fingers, that added pressure enough to send you hurtling over the edge again. You keen as he strokes you through it, rutting into you faster until his own hips are stuttering and he joins you in that ecstasy.

His cracked lips catch your own when he cums, his tongue licking into your mouth for a kiss that's long and deep, the two of you not separating until he's slumping beneath you, crimson eyes half-lidded. He lifts a calloused thumb to trace over your quivering lower lip.

"Does my handsome boy need more?" he asks, and it's only then you realize you're still fidgeting atop him, that briefly sated ache already returning.

Your face heats up as you nod, embarrassed, but Tomura only grins lasciviously and rolls you off him, arranging you on all fours, grinding his already-swelling length against the curve of your ass and then gliding it over your soaked slit as you whine.

Some days Tomura likes to tease, likes to make you beg for it, but not when you're like this. No, he means it when he swears he'll take care of you, would never even dream of prolonging your misery, no matter how much he might enjoy seeing you writhing and libidinous.

If he's being honest, he enjoys this urgency, too, relishes sinking his length into your soaked, greedy cunt, and the way you yelp in response, bucking feebly to meet his thrusts before you're quickly overwhelmed, collapsing under his efforts. His hands gripping your hips are the only thing keeping you in any way upright as your face presses into the bed, the mattress dampening your cries as you drool against the sheets, lost in the sensation of him stretching you wide.

The head of his cock strokes just right against that sensitive place inside as he pumps himself in and out, enough to have that knot in your belly tightening yet again, and when his thumb moves to brush at your clit it only spurs you even closer to your next release. He keeps his touch gentle, that sensitive nub already tender and overstimulated from the constant attention it demands.

Tomura can feel your slick walls pulsing around his cock as he works you over, that physiological reaction quickly joined by your high-keyed cries. He runs one hand along your back again, trying to comfort you even as he encourages you come apart for him.

"That's my—a-ah—good boy. Cum for me as many—fuck—" he swears as your walls clench again, harder this time "—as many times as you need."

That permission is all it takes and then you're crumbling, quaking as another orgasm tears through you, white spots swimming behind your eyes as you tremble and squirm. He fucks you straight through your release again, so rough and unrelenting that you can't quite tell where that climax ends and the next one begins, can't do anything more than clutch at the sheets and sob with gratitude, practically writhing with overstimulation until he's burying himself to the hilt and filling your insides with yet another rush of his hot seed.  

You can feel those combined juices dribbling down your thighs when he finally withdraws, collapsing next to you and tugging you once again to his chest, softly petting your hair as he places a kiss to your sweaty forehead, and you cling to him gratefully.

Tomura doesn't speak, only enjoys this brief respite knowing that you'll soon be restless again. That's okay; he'll fuck you again if he's had enough time to recover, and if he hasn't he'll bury his face into your sloppy heat and enjoy the strange thrill of tasting your juices mixing together.

No matter what, he'll always make sure you're taken care of.

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Gavin’s Sky Date - Prologue

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date prologue, 云霄之约, which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Do note that you have to read this before embarking on the actual date, because it contains background information and sweet domestic bliss you wouldn't want to miss :>

[ This date was released on 14 April 2021 ]

[ Part One: A Dream About to Take Flight ]

MC: Ahhh! My life is up to me. Not. Up. To. Fate!

The small dice in my furled hand is tossed around several times. When I loosen my grip, it rolls quickly on the map -- ‘2′.

Gavin: Hahaha--

Gavin laughs, but hurriedly retracts his smile when he senses my murderous gaze.

Gavin: It’s okay, things will definitely take a favourable turn in the next round.

Sulky, I let out of a huff. I watch as he picks up the dice, casually rolling a '5′. Then, he cheerfully shifts his own plane on the map by six spaces.

[Note] In the game of Aeroplane Chess, your plane can only leave the starting point if you roll a ‘5′ of ‘6′!

MC: ...

It’s a Saturday afternoon. Gavin and I had nothing to do after eating, so we randomly grabbed a set of Aeroplane Chess from the supermarket to play. But I didn’t expect to have such a terrible gaming experience!

Although it’s been the sixth or seventh round, I just can’t the ‘6′ I need to get my plane out of the hangar. On the other hand, Gavin has always been able to get it to take flight smoothly, and very quickly reaches the goal.

MC: Gavin, with your kind of luck, there’s no need to waste it on playing games with me.

After pondering for a long while, I offer him a serious suggestion.

MC: Let’s head out to buy a lottery ticket?

Gavin: Why don’t we play something else? The paper model from last time was only half done. Since we have time today, we could get it done at one go.

At this moment, the phone on the floor beside me rings. Seeing the familiar number, I tap on the hands-free function.

Nurse: Miss MC, the physical report done at our hospital is ready. Please bring your receipt and collect it within fifteen working days.

MC: Mm, got it, thank you.

Gavin is currently storing the Aeroplane Chess pieces into the box. Hearing this conversation, he gives me a puzzled look.

Gavin: Haven’t you already gone for a physical examination this year? Are you feeling unwell?

MC: No, no. I’m using the report for the registration.

I deliberately pretend to be secretive, leaning towards him. Then, I show him the registration form that I had submitted online beforehand.

MC: I’m going to get a Private Pilot License.

-

[ Part Two: First Day of School ]

On the first day of aviation training, I set the alarm to wake me up at 6.30am. Even Gavin is stunned at the level of enthusiasm I have for learning.

Gavin: The courses for the aviation license can get pretty dry. You have to be mentally prepared.

MC: Are you referring to things like meteorology, aircraft structure, air traffic regulations?

Gavin: Mm. Aside from the exams, such knowledge is necessary for aircraft pilots.

While he speaks, he lifts his head to give me a smile.

Gavin: But they definitely won’t stump you.

After packing my things, I grab a random jacket and prepare to leave.

The classes take place in the suburbs, and it takes an hour to get there. Despite waking up early, I’d be late if I don’t hurry up.

But Gavin is clearly not too worried about this matter. He holds a slice of bread in his mouth while looking at his phone.

Gavin: Since I’m sending you there, you won’t be late. Before your first official lesson, I’ll give you a flight class.

I walk over to him, pulling up the zipper of his uniform, and also picking up the motorcycle helmet from the table.

MC: To prevent this from being a mere flash in the pan, I want to leave the joy of flight to the end of the course. But if going by land would make me late...

Gavin rolls the bread into his mouth, taking the helmet from my hand.

Gavin: No matter the route, you won’t be late. Oh yes, what class are you taking today?

-

[ Part Two, Option 1: Principles of Meteorology ]

Instructor: I’ll ask some small questions to test your foundation and see if you take note of knowledge in this area.

He opens the PowerPoint presentation, then uses a laser pointer to point at the image on the first page - it's a cumulus cloud with a flat bottom layer and a high, upward curve at the top.

Instructor: Does anyone know what this cloud is called?

MC: Cumulus congestus cloud.

Instructor: Correct. The next question - when the International Civil Aviation Organisation observes cloud volume, how many segments do they divide the sky into?

MC: It should be eight segments.

I recall that Gavin brought this up before.

Instructor: Not bad, miss. You did preparatory work beforehand, didn’t you?

MC: No no, I have a friend who has a better understanding in this area, so I was just influenced.

After saying this, chuckles drift from the surroundings. The instructor nods in understanding.

Instructor: In that case, you won’t have a problem during the exams.

MC: ...I’ll do my best.

After all, my confidence is limited when it comes to exams.

Just as I’m thinking about this, I receive a notification on my phone. Gavin has sent me an incredibly large document file.

Gavin: I don’t know how to teach, so I compiled some materials you might need for the exam.

I grip my phone, suddenly feeling like the weather is so good that it makes one carefree and relaxed.

It’s just an exam. I’ll definitely be fine.

-

[ Part Two, Option 2: Aviation Regulations Class ]

At 2pm in the afternoon, the sun shines from above. I had a full meal, so fighting against the sleeping bug is a difficult challenge.

Instructor: Before the flight, the captain has to carry out the necessary inspections of the aircraft. Until the inspections are complete, you can’t take off. This regulation is easy to understand. In fact...

When the dullness of the course matches how fine the weather is, the entire classroom gets immersed in a drowsy atmosphere.

I take a few deep breaths and pat my face... but I still feel like sleeping.

Instructor: Okay, we’ll take a 10 minute break. You students look sleepy, so go wash your faces to freshen up.

The moment he finishes speaking, the sound of heads plopping down on the tables can be heard all around.

Just as I prepare to stand up and stretch, my phone suddenly vibrates.

Delivery boy: Hello, I’ve placed your take-out at the main counter.

MC: Take-out?

But I didn’t order take-out...

While I’m puzzled, the young lady from the main counter very politely brings the item to the classroom - it’s a cup of coffee.

There’s only one simple line on the note of the take-out: Persevere for a little longer. Gavin.

I retrieve the coffee from the bag, taking a tiny slip. The instructor walks past, giving me a glance from the side.

Instructor: Are you drinking coffee or milk tea? You’re smiling so happily.

MC: Being able to swim in the ocean of knowledge is always meant to be a happy thing.

The instructor gives me an expression which says, “like I’d actually believe you”.

MC: Instructor, let’s continue with the lesson. I’m not drowsy anymore. Learning for another four hours is no problem at all!

-

[ Part Three: Being Your Co-pilot ]

Gavin: Do you want to head out for a stroll after dinner? It seems to be really cooling outside.

I’m currently taking out plates from the kitchen drawer, subconsciously craning my head to glance outside.

MC: It’s going to rain, isn’t it...

Gavin: Really? I’ll check the weather forecast. Earlier in the afternoon, Eli mentioned taking out some time to wash his car at night. I even thought today would be a good day.

I step into the living room, setting down plates on the dining table. 

MC: There are just some cumulonimbus clouds in the sky. It might not really rain.

Gavin scrolls through the real-time weather, then gives me a smile.

Gavin: It’s really going to rain.

He gets up, opening the rice cooker and scooping a full bowl of rice for me.

Gavin: At first, I even thought you’d find such theoretical knowledge boring. I didn’t think you’d learn them so earnestly. Looks like you really want to get the license.

MC: Of course. I want to be your co-pilot.

Although Gavin hasn’t even scooped rice for himself, he’s already served me a huge pile of vegetables.

Gavin: Sure. I’ll wait for the day you get your license.

Just as I’m about to talk about how assured I am about getting the license, I realise that the plate on my hand is becoming fuller and fuller. 

Before I can even voice my question, Gavin responds.

Gavin: Learning is tough. You need to eat a little more. I also bought you ice-cream. It’s in the second compartment of the freezer. I remember you mentioning that as long as you eat something delicious during difficult times, you can press on easily.

MC: ...hahaha! Mm! After having this meal, I’ll complete all my post-class homework!

-

[ Aviation Terminology Class ]

MC: Calling for the control tower. Number N8596 has arrived, and is requesting for a landing gate.

Gavin (through the phone): Number N8596, you may use aircraft Gate Number One.

Gavin’s light-hearted laughter drifts from the phone.

Gavin: Shouldn’t your class end at 7pm? It’s only 6pm.

MC: The plan was to be dismissed at 7pm, but... for some reason, those in my class were really interested in the Aviation Terminology class, so they did their preparatory work in advance. The three hour class was over in one and a half hours. The instructor said that we already grasped all the key points, so we were dismissed early. What about you? How much longer till you’re off work?

Gavin: For me... less than half an hour. You could think about what to do with this unexpectedly free hour. I remember that there’s a new dessert shop opposite the cinema.

MC: You remembered? I never even told you about it. How could you remember? Officer Gavin, you better tell me the truth. You didn’t remember it - you specially searched it up.

Gavin: Mm, I specially searched it up. I even found that there are claw machines along the shopping street on the ground level of the cinema. 

MC: Looks like what I’m going to do in the next hour has already been scheduled. 

Gavin: Wait for me at the office first. I’ll look for you once I’m done with the work on hand.

-

[ Part Four: Flight Practice ]

Today’s the first flight practice class. The instructor is sitting in the co-pilot seat, watching my every move throughout the entire journey.

I wasn't nervous at first, but each time he glances at me, I involuntary wonder if I’ve done something wrong.

In an instant, I recall the fear of taking the aviation exam...

Until the plane successfully takes flight, I keep feeling as though the thing suspending in the air isn’t the plane, but my heart.

Instructor: It’s rare for you to make a trip up here. What’s there to be nervous about? Come, lift your head and look at the sky.

At this moment, countless gripes flash across my mind: What’s so nice about the sky? I’ve seen all kinds of skies. Right now, all I want is to fly the plane...

But the moment I lift my head, I’m rendered speechless.

Instructor: How is it? The first time I saw it, I was so stunned that I couldn't speak either.

MC: It’s really beautiful.

Sunlight casts a layer of golden hue on the soft and white clouds, blending the colours of gold and crimson.

I’m unable to describe how the scenery before me makes me feel. 

It’s a feeling which... makes one feel that life has meaning.

All of a sudden, another thought surfaces in my mind: I wonder what went through Gavin’s mind when he saw such a sight for the first time.

The instructor sitting next to me glances at me from the side.

Instructor: Thinking about your boyfriend again?

MC: [blushing] ...no!

Instructor: It’s normal. Each time I’m flying, I can’t help but think of my wife. There isn’t a reason to it. It’s just a sudden thought, an involuntary reaction.

The instructor laughs as he gives me advice with a contagious smile.

Instructor: If you’re thinking about him, just do it. It’s fine. It’s a normal thing. When you see certain things, your natural reaction is to think of someone.

MC: ...Instructor, I usually can’t tell, but you’re actually quite philosophical.

I grab the joystick of the plane, watching as countless clouds drift past leisurely.

All I want to do is take a photograph of this moment for Gavin.

Date: here

-

Gavin watching as I drool over the thought of Eli scrubbing his car in the rain while wearing a singlet:

[lizziedoesvetpath]

Wait, I'm sorry to bother you, but how is the term "necropsy" used compared to "autopsy"? Iirc, you always use "necropsy" for animals, right? (If that's the case, do you know if/how often the term is used for humans?)

It's not a bother at all! This is actually an interesting question that I think a lot of people have, so thanks for asking.

In their broadest definitions, autopsy, necropsy, and post mortem all cover the same basic idea: a medical investigation involving dissection of a cadaver with the intention of investigating disease and/or identifying cause of death.

Necropsy is the word most commonly used in the veterinary field for this procedure.

Post mortem is very general, because it literally just means "after death". I was taught in an institution that pretty much used this interchangeably with necropsy so I personally use it quite frequently. Sometimes I think this term is easier for lay people (ie: not medical professionals or biological scientists) to stomach because the necro in necropsy is associated with other terms that people are put off by. But that's just my opinion from observation and it doesn't necessarily hold true in all situations.

Autopsy is primarily used in the human medical field, in so far as I'm aware. In my experience, it is generally considered incorrect to use this to describe the procedure in a veterinary context. But I still use this with some regularity because I get cases direct from owners, with no clinical veterinarian mediating between us. Autopsy is a word that I think is better understood by the general public to be a medical procedure. And that's something I always want to emphasize about what I do. Some people are really put off submitting their animal for necropsy because they have this idea that we're taking their animal apart for curiosity, but it's not like that. This is a respectful, meaningful, medical procedure. I get that it's scary for people because death is a weird and scary thing in the cultures I've lived in, so this isn't the job for everyone, but in the end it's a medical investigation in the same way that an endoscopy or an MRI is, and it's done with the express purposes of learning and helping.

So, from that long-winded answer, necropsy is the term I've heard and used the most for the procedure in animals, but it's not the only one. If someone in the human medical field has more information about terminology on that side of things, feel free to chime in!

And for everyone else, please feel free to keep sending me your questions about all things veterinary pathology! I may be slow to reply, but I do genuinely try to answer them all :)

[akaluan]

Erich/Kisuke: Accidental Marriage + It’s Not A Date, We Swear Part 4

Erich hauls a new box onto Kisuke’s workbench and absently uses his reiatsu to slice it open, mind still focused on what he sensed — or rather didn’t sense — from Kisuke earlier; the rough edges of the man’s soul and the shadings of desire-longing-want were almost expected — such intimate reiatsu sharing had a tendency to invoke similar reactions no matter who was doing it — but the complete lack of anything that could have drawn Tessai’s attention…

That he didn’t have an answer for.

Nothing had stood out, everything seemed right to him, and yet… and yet Tessai’s reaction tells him there’s something there, something he’s missed no matter how deep, how thorough, his search had been.

The whole thing has left him uneasy and off balance, like there’s something hanging over his head, ready to strike the minute he looks away—

“I hope I didn’t keep you waiting long,” Kisuke declares as he sweeps into the room, once more dressed in his usual outfit; it’s both a relief and a disappointment, because Erich has eyes and Kisuke wasn’t the only one affected by the earlier reiatsu sharing, but he also knows that they’re friends and little else.

“You didn’t,” Erich says as he nods towards another open box on the other side of the workbench. “I hauled a box over and opened it for you, and just opened my own.”

Kisuke makes a pleased noise and darts around the table to the other side, peering into the box that Erich set out for him. “Mou, just more bottles and knives,” he says with a put upon sigh, then pulls the first one out and holds it up. He frowns as he stares at it, tipping it back and forth, and then asks, “Or maybe not the same?”

“The histories mentioned more than one potion,” Erich tells him in amusement, then steps around to stand at Kisuke’s side and leans in to peer through the amber glass. It’s not sparkling like the glamour bottles — nor is it translucent like them — so he’s inclined to believe it isn’t one, instead of it having lost its potency. “I’m… not sure which this is, though,” Erich admits after a moment. “There’s nothing particularly distinctive about it, which… describes about half the potions I’ve heard stories of.”

“Potions,” Kisuke repeats with a tiny laugh, then leans away and raises his hands in surrender when Erich scowls at him. “Sorry! It’s just… hearing you talk about potions—”

“What else am I supposed to call them?” Erich asks grumpily as he rolls his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest. He knows exactly how Kisuke feels — he used to snicker at all the stories too, before he realized exactly what his people had lost — but hearing it from someone else, someone not a Quincy, is… different. Wrong. Infuriating. “The terminology was established centuries ago. It’s not my decision.”

Kisuke sobers at that, a strange glint in his eyes and hints of regret-awkwardness-uncertainty in his reiatsu as he sets the bottle down. “Sorry,” he murmurs, reiatsu filling with sincerity-regret-determination in the process. “I won’t do that again.”

Erich grimaces and frees a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. He takes a breath, sets aside his absurd reaction, and says, “It’s fine. It is hilarious, you’re right about that. I don’t… really know why I reacted like that.”

“Because in the end, friend or not, I’m not a Quincy,” Kisuke says easily, then shrugs when Erich shoots him a puzzled look. “What? It’s not exactly a mystery why you’d take offense at a Shinigami laughing at pieces of your history. Isn’t that exactly why you didn’t want the Twelfth involved?”

Erich bites his lip and looks away, disliking the implication that he doesn’t entirely trust Kisuke with helping him. If he’s still thinking of Kisuke — of his friend — as a Shinigami—

Kisuke steps closer, reaching out—

Only to hesitate, hand hovering near Erich’s shoulder as uncertainty blooms in his reiatsu, so heavy that Erich can almost taste it, and it’s… odd.

(He’s never felt Kisuke’s emotions so clearly before.)

(He’s never known the man to wear his heart on his sleeve, so why now…?)

(What’s changed?)

Even as Kisuke pushes past his nerves and grips Erich’s shoulder, Erich continues to turn the question over and over in his mind. Contact doesn’t seem to change a thing, so it probably isn’t a result of their proximity, so what in the world…?

(There’s something he’s forgetting.)

(Something he’s overlooked…)

(But what?)

“I don’t mind,” Kisuke says firmly, dragging Erich away from the faded memory niggling at the back of his mind. “Just being allowed to see all these strange uses of reiatsu is enough for me,” he adds with a wry smile. “I hope you’ll let me help you decipher at least some of it—”

“I plan to,” Erich interrupts, temporarily giving up on whatever it is he’s overlooked; it’ll either come to him or it won’t, but now isn’t the time to be distracted. “I’m good at adapting or redesigning things I already know, not reverse engineering mysterious creations from hundreds of years ago.”

The anxiety-regret-nervousness in Kisuke’s reiatsu melts away as Erich talks, and Kisuke’s smile widens, crinkling the corners of his silvery eyes and brightening his expression into something almost breathtaking. “Well now, that I can certainly do.”

Erich swallows. Tears his gaze away from his friend and back to the box in front of them. “I’m sure you can,” he says as dryly as possible, trying to inject a bit of normality back into their conversation. “It’s what I was counting on, after all.”

“I see how it is,” Kisuke says playfully, letting go of Erich’s shoulder and stepping back. “You just want me for my brain.”

“It is an exceedingly clever one,” Erich agrees with perhaps a touch more fondness than necessary, then gives himself a mental shake and retreats back to the other side of the workbench before… before something happens.

(He’s not so sure he wants to know what that something will be.)

(Maybe that chalice did leave an effect behind…?)

(Damn, if only he knew what it was for!)

He leans against the workbench and pretends to peer into the box in front of him, using the moment to reorient himself and tuck away the last, lingering traces of longing-interest-want from when they shared reiatsu earlier. He can’t afford the distraction, not now, not when they have so much to do, not when Kisuke almost certainly doesn’t feel that way about him.

(Kisuke can’t feel that way about him, surely.)

(A powerful-clever-cunning man like Kisuke would never look at him like that… would he?)

Erich pauses. Casts a glance through his eyelashes at Kisuke. Tries to discard his assumptions in favor of assessments like he was once trained.

It’s… hard. Harder than he’d like it to be, because he’s always been terrible at assessing how others view him. It’s why he’s always let his actions speak for him instead of trying to put himself forward; at least then he can’t misread someone and thus misspeak and ruin his chances at whatever it is he wants.

But Kisuke…

Kisuke had been awkward this morning, a blush staining his cheeks and his gaze constantly roaming from Erich to the room and back again, as if he couldn’t bear to look away but didn’t want to stare.

They’d done nothing but sleep in the same bed, much of their clothing still on, and yet…

Kisuke had rambled like a waterfall and then fled as if his life depended upon it.

Erich absently plucks a little decorative box out of the collection of things and turns it over in his hands just as he turns the idea of Kisuke wanting him over in his mind.

Several months ago, he would have been infuriated by the idea, would have done his best to be colder-sharper-stricter, but after needing to work together for Kurosaki and Ishida’s sakes, after spending long evenings and longer nights pouring over tomes and modifying techniques in search of an answer to Kurosaki’s power loss, after fighting alongside each other against other Quincy…

He doesn’t know when it happened, when his mind changed, but… if Kisuke is in love with him…

Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad after all…

(Does he dare test his theory?)

(How would he even go about it?)

(He hasn’t tried to show interest in anyone in decades!)

(He… doesn’t know how…)

(Alexis always just knew, but Kisuke isn’t Alexis and it’s unfair to hold them to the same expectations.)

(So how…?)

Erich sighs and sets the little decorative box aside without trying to open it — there’s no point right now, not really — and tries to set his thoughts aside the same way. There’s no use driving himself into a frenzy over a possibility, not when he has so much to do. He can’t afford to be distracted while handling ancient and damaged relics, as the previous evening already proved; they have a long day ahead of them and no time to waste on a possibility that Erich doesn’t know what to do with.

He might even be wrong, might be reading more into the situation than there truly is to see; Kisuke might just be uncomfortable with sharing space like that, or… or simply unused to it after so long as an exile.

(His instincts say he’s right.)

(His mind says it can’t be possible.)

(Which does he trust…?)

Erich clenches a hand, nails digging into his palm just hard into to send pain skittering up his nerves, and breathes out. Refocuses.

(He’ll… deal with this later.)

(That… that sounds like a plan.)

(Maybe if he just—)

(No.)

(Later.)

(…)

(Or never.)

(Never sounds good too.)

(…he’s such a mess…)

[idnek83]

please consider using masculine terminology for trans male characters tho cuz dysphoria is brutal and hearing terms like "clit" and "cunt" used for trans dudes can be triggering 😭

Hi! This is actually a really important thing I probably should have addressed earlier, thanks for bringing it up!

First off, I’ve been forgetting to add warnings and tags on my trans content about afab language being used, and I’m really sorry about that. I’ve gone back and added warnings and tags to everything and I will do better in the future. I’m really sorry to anyone I hurt by leaving out these warnings, it’s 100% my fault.

Secondly, I generally use terms I’m personally comfortable with while writing, I’m afab and identify somewhere on the non-binary/genderqueer spectrum, and I’ve just always preferred to just use traditionally feminine terms for myself, so it’s what comes out when I write trans characters. I do understand lots of transmen don’t like using feminine terms to refer to themselves, but at the same time there’s also plenty that don’t mind or even enjoy using those terms, so I will continue using them in my writing. At the end of the day I write because I enjoy it, and I enjoy what I write, and I don’t believe my writing is harmful to other trans people (though failing to properly tag it was). If that makes you uncomfortable please feel free to either block the ‘afab language’ tag, or to unfollow and/or block me, I totally understand and it’s completely valid for you and anyone else to feel that way. Gender is a huge spectrum and we aren’t all going to be comfortable with the same things, and that’s okay.

That being said, I think I should definitely branch out and do some more writing with masculine terminology for trans male characters. Just because it’s my preference not to doesn’t mean that it’s something I should never do. Even while writing that last post I was thinking to myself that while I think Soda would be comfortable with using pretty much any terms for himself, Gundham would prefer traditionally masculine terms. I didn’t write it that way because I was worried it would make it confusing and hard to tell that Gundham was trans, but now I’m realizing that was pretty stupid and ignorant of me, and if I can’t make my writing clear while using masculine terms then that just means I’m a bad writer. I’ve gone back and changed the terms for Gundham in that post. I’ll probably use masculine terms for most of my trans Gundham content in the future, and will make sure to tag it if I don’t.

Again, I want to thank you for sending this ask. It’s a pretty important topic that I haven’t been addressing properly and needed to reflect on. Please let me know if you have any other concerns or if there's something I failed to address, otherwise I wish you well, and I’m sorry for hurting you.

[uncloseted]

lately i've been VERY confused about gender and sexuality (not mine, just in general, although more on that later). so i always called myself a lesbian because it made sense, im a girl i like girls. about 2 years ago i had a lot of internalized homophobia and i tried to be as feminine as i could so people would think i was straight. and i remember one time i thought "what if i'm a trans man and i'm doing this because i feel like i have something to prove". +

but then i thought "nah, i can't be a man (or non binary) i like girly things too much". but that's awful too. ellen always wears suits and has short hair and she's still a woman. jeffree star likes girly things and he's a man. but now i don't even know what IS a girl/woman. i mean i didn't choose to be a woman and i never had a chance to be anything else. but i don't think i ever wanted to be. even if i identified as "agender" and i still looked and acted the way i do know, society would still

be seeing and oppressing me as a woman, so at least to me, personally, it feels useless. but also, a lot of nb people (most of them are afab) identify as lesbians. it's very confusing. i never had any kind of dysphoria although i felt uncomfortable with my body, periods, and sex but i always thought it was because of shyness, anxiety, internalized homophobia, insecurities and beauty standards. and i have a friend who's studying psychology in university and she told me dysphoria does not exist

trans girls. i think it depends on, like, how "far" they are in their transition?. i think i could be attracted, physically and emotionally but i couldn't have sex with someone with a penis. and i know even the most trans-positive people will tell you that it's ok to have a genital preference and not want to date trans people. but it still makes me feel horrible because it's like i'm seeing nb people as "more woman" than trans women. but also in all honesty it's very hard to "tell" cis people

from nb people. if you showed me a picture of jeffree star and jonathan van ness (or elena and syd from one day at a time, or amandla stenberg and king princess, or sam smith and harry styles) and asked me which one is nb, i wouldn't know. i would probably say jeffree. so i agree that monosexual (straight/gay) people will inevitably be attracted to nbs because nb is a spectrum, and also some people (I think all of us, in some way? maybe it's a controversial opinion) are gender non-conforming but

but don't identify as nb. does that mean we should change the definitions of gay/lesbian, since any gender could have any type of body and look as feminine and/or masculine as they want? do sam smith, jvn, vander von odd/sasha velour/gigi goode (all genderfluid drag artists) have male privilege despite not being men?. should we change the words feminism, sexism, misogyny, male privilege, etc for something more accurate?. honeslty i think a lot of this confusion is actually intrusive thoughts

and me just being an overthinker in general but it's been causing me so much distress that now every pronoun feels wrong and i can't even masturbate. please forgive the rambling, the buts, the incoherence and the ignorance. thanks in advance. oh and please tell me if this comes through in pieces and i will send them again

So there’s a ton to unpack here, but for the record, I’ve had this exact train of thought, too.

I want to preface my answer by saying that I’m not a gender scholar and I haven’t read nearly as many academic works as I’d like to on this subject, so this is coming very much from my personal opinions and less from an evidence-based/academic place. I also want to say that if pressed, I would describe myself as a pansexual gender anarchist (as in, attracted to people for who they are instead of their parts and I think we should get rid of the concept of gender entirely), but I think that sounds a bit wanky, especially since it has almost zero bearing on my everyday life. So I think the concept of sexuality and gender is maybe different to me than it is to other people, and my perspective on this topic might be unusual in that sense.  If anyone reading this thinks what I’m saying is bullshit or problematic, please join in the conversation! I would love to hear what you have to say.

For me, the more I think about gender and sexuality, the more i don’t really “get” either concept. Gender has begun to feel (to me) like one of those Buzzfeed quizzes where you answer a bunch of questions and they’re like, “you’re rocky road ice cream” and you’re like, “I have no idea what that implies except for it’s the collection of traits I chose from the options above”.  

What I mean by that is that gender is a social construct. No traits are inherently masculine or feminine- things that are considered masculine in one culture can be feminine in another and vice versa. 

Especially now, when we’re really moving towards disentangling gender from our world, I wonder what’s left to take the place of those items to define what gender is.  Gender used to be like “feminine is cleaning, nurturing, creating (or Barbie dolls, dresses, and makeup), and masculine is destruction, being powerful, and being ambitious (or football, beer, and video games)”, but clearly that’s not what it means anymore. Ellen’s suits are feminine suits by virtue of the fact that she IDs as female, even though suits used to be considered a male thing.  Jeffree Star’s makeup looks are male makeup looks by virtue of the fact that he IDs as male, even though makeup used to be considered a female thing.  I’ve heard some people say that there are as many genders as there are people in the world. At that point I think we’re just using the word “gender” as a synonym for “personality”, which is fine, but I think we need to be clear about our definitions and what these words now mean and imply about a person.

Going along that train of thought, if gendered words don’t really mean anything anymore, I don’t see the point as identifying as a particular gender, at last not in the abstract.  In practice, our world still sees gender and cares about it, and other people’s interpretation of our gender has very real consequences.  As you say, even if you identified as agender, society would treat you as a woman because you present in a way society considers to be “traditionally feminine”, and as a result, you would be oppressed in the same way women are.  This is why I said that my position on gender impacts my life zero percent.  I can identify as a gender anarchist all I want, but at the end of the day I still get passed up for opportunities because the way I present is read as female.  Likewise, nonbinary people who were assigned male at birth do have a degree of male privilege (or at least, can access male privilege), depending on how well they “pass” as a man.  Sam Smith likely still experiences some male privilege, because they look (most of the time) like what society might consider traditionally male.  Someone like JVN probably passes less frequently, due to his long hair and frequent wearing of what we might think of as traditionally female clothing (skirts and dresses and high heels).  However, the flip side of that is both Sam Smith and JVN risk being even more marginalized than female identifying, female presenting people when they do dress in a gender non-conforming way, because nonbinary identities are less understood and less accepted than female identities are. 

So now that we’ve considered what gender means in relation to society, maybe let’s consider it in relation to our bodies and sexuality.  This is a bit of a minefield so I’m going to try to tread carefully, but again, feel free to call me out if I say something problematic... 

I don’t think being uncomfortable with your body, especially feminine features of your body that are widely looked down upon (for example, periods) or sexualized (physical features like boobs, butts, hips) necessarily makes a person trans or nonbinary.  As you say, those feelings can be a result of shyness, anxiety, internalized homophobia, insecurities, beauty standards, and dozens of other things.  However, it is something many trans or nonbinary individuals experience.  So the question then becomes, where are those feelings of discomfort coming from?  Are they internal to you (as in, your body physically feels like there’s something wrong/those features shouldn’t be there) or external (you feel shame for having those features because of the society you grew up in)?  It can be really hard to detangle internal influences from external ones, given that people who are assigned female at birth learn to hate our femininity and female bodies from a very young age.

I would say that if those feelings are internal to you, then that’s what referred to as gender dysphoria.  Gender dysphoria is a real, ICD and DSM diagnosable condition, and there’s some evidence to suggest that there’s a neurobiological basis for it.  My (very controversial) hypothesis is that gender dysphoria is like other body integrity identity disorders, where there’s a mismatch between the brain’s map of the body and what the physical body actually looks like.  I want to make it clear here that I don’t think being trans is a disorder.  I don’t think it’s bad or that all people who are trans have a body integrity disorder.  I don’t think you need to physically transition to be trans, or that we should pathologize gender/gender expression, or that gender is a binary (hopefully that last one is obvious).  I just think if society has less stringent gender divisions and a less binary understanding of gender, fewer people would physically transition, but some people would still experience a mismatch between their idea of how their body’s sexual characteristics should look and how they physically are.

So then, what does that mean for our terminology?  I think in the context of a world where the meaning of gender is changing, gay and lesbian just refer to genitals (people with penises attracted to people with penises and people with vaginas attracted to people with vaginas, respectively).  Or perhaps we need to separate it out further- maybe you can be romantically and physically attracted to female and male presenting people, but sexually attracted to only vaginas.  Maybe that would fill the gap between being interested in a person romantically and being interested in having sex with their genitals, where you’re attracted to someone without yet knowing what’s in their pants?  In general, though, I think labels should exist to be useful.  I don’t know how useful it is to have a term for “I'm attracted to you, given that you have the genitals I’m sexually attracted to.”

I think under that framework of centering labels like gay and lesbian on genitals, a lot more people are pansexual than would identify that way if you took a poll right now.  In general, I think a lot of people never recognize that they’re pansexual because they aren’t in contact with nonbinary or trans people that they’re attracted to frequently enough to know they don’t actually care about genital preferences.

When talking about other labels like feminism (the advocacy for AFAB and female-identifying/presenting rights), sexism (prejudice, stereotyping, or discrimination, generally towards female identifying/presenting people. but also towards gender nonconforming people), misogyny (dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against AFAB and female identifying/presenting people), male privilege (the system of advantages or rights that are available to men and male identifying/presenting people solely on the basis of their sex/gender presentation), etc., I think those terms refer to the societal construct of sex/gender that is still prevalent in our culture.  We perhaps need to start using other words to describe discrimination against nonbinary people, but I think the existing terms continue to serve a purpose and it’s not time to retire them just yet.

I don’t know if any of this is at all helpful or if I’m expressing my thoughts clearly.  Maybe it will just add more confusion to your existing thought process, but I hope it helps to minimize your distress at least a little bit.  Ultimately, all of this is kind of made up, so don’t beat yourself up too much while trying to unravel all these different threads. People spend full academic careers and sometimes their entire lives trying to figure out what they believe on these issues.  It’s okay to not have it all worked out or to not be sure in your ideas.  Even for me, this is just where my thinking is right now.  Maybe in the future it will change with new information I learn or as my feelings towards myself change.  Try to let yourself think of this as a journey instead of something you have to already have figured out.

[monstax]

Hello~ I’m fairly new to kpop and starting stanning Monsta X and was wondering if you could explain to me the age of the members (like who calls who hyung (I’m also new to these terminologies as well as maknae)😭) I’ve been asking around but I am still lost

Hi there!

First off, I’d like to apologize for the late reply! If you still follow us, see this, or any new fans in general, I hope this helps!

Neither I or Admin S are Korean ourselves so we can only state as much as we know and have known in our years of being fans. However, I have studied Korean to an extent for a few years so I will say I have some level of credibility behind what I’m saying!

Also, for any other fans who would love to add on to this definitely feel free to! It’s always nice and helpful getting second opinions on stuff like this especially when it ties into culture!

Please bear with me as I delve into this and explain what I know.

Let me start by listing a few basic terms first and their meanings!

hyung 형 older brother (used by males)

noona/nuna 누나 older sister (used by males)

oppa 오빠 older brother (used by females)

eonni/unni   언니 older sister (used by females)

dongsaeng   동생 younger sibling

jondaetmal   존댓말 formal speech/polite speech

banmal   반말 informal speech

mathyung   맏형 eldest brother (in a group)

maknae   막내 youngest (person in a group)

I’ll try to shorten down the basics and general facts!

In Korean culture, they have a hierarchical system. With this system there is something called jondaetmal (존댓말). It’s split into two different sections: formal speech and polite speech.You would more likely use formal speech towards those of high status (in business, school, work, etc.) and older than you. Polite speech falls with speaking to those you are friendly with and non-business settings.

Then they have banmal (반말) which is known as informal speech. Typically used by the older person to a younger person and also between close friends/individuals.

Basically, anyone older than you, you should address them politely in the language (if not formally appropriate). Anyone younger than you, kind of depends. For example,

(Don’t take my word for sure on this one! But my thoughts are)

If they’re younger than you but it’s your first time meeting, it’d probably be better to use polite speech to them. Even though they’re younger than you, it’s not like you’re close.

If they’re younger than you but you two are close, it’d be appropriate to use banmal with them.

Another big thing to consider is that in Korea, friends is not a loose term. For example, in the United States, you could be friends with someone who’s seven years younger than you, and another person who is ten years older than you. Saying that they’re your friends wouldn’t seem odd in that concept at all. However in Korea, your friends are strictly individuals who are born the same year as you.

For example, if I was born a year before you were, and you told people I was your friend but we’re born in different years, they’d be confused. That’s because I’m older than you, so our relationship is different where I’d be a hyung/eonni to you, and you’d be my dongsaeng.

Now, to delve into the members of Monsta X and how they would address each other.

I’ll start by listing off the members in their public birth orders.

Shownu: June 18, 1992

Wonho: March 1, 1993

Minhyuk: November 3, 1993

Kihyun: November 22, 1993

Hyungwon: January 15, 1994

Jooheon: October 6, 1994

I.M: January 26, 1996

Just by looking at this list, we should be able to say that Shownu is the mathyung, and I.M is the maknae. Starting by I.M and up, whoever is older than who should be addressing that person as hyung.

I’ll try to give a visual as well. Left to right: the people in front of the arrow are called hyung by the individuals left of the arrow. If they’re grouped together, they don’t address each other as hyung and most likely use banmal with each other.

I.M —> Jooheon Hyungwon —> Kihyun Minhyuk —> Wonho Shownu

Before you ask, yes Wonho is paired up with Shownu, and the younger members (including Minhyuk and Kihyun who are born the same year) address him as hyung. But why?

There are a lot of speculations about Wonho’s actual age, and I’ll be very honest I think it’s something monbebes will probably never know or figure out unless if the boys address it.

Some fans say that he was actually born 1992, despite the birth year that’s posted online in a lot of places list 1993. Some say that Wonho is actually older than Shownu entirely and that his birthdate is probably different, but not revealed for several reasons.

Then there is another thing that I lean towards more myself, just because it seems more reasonable regarding an aspect of the Korean culture.

In Korea, if you’re born in January or February, you could be considered as if you were born the year before because it’s “early January” or “early February”. So even though Wonho was born in 1993, if he was enlisted into school early, he would be attending with those born in 1992, therefore he’s basically the same age as them.

In Korea, when asked about age, if you’re born in either of those months and your parents choose to have you older, that’s something that you make clear at the very beginning. You would tell the person asking that you were born “early January” so that they’re aware that you’re a part of the age group a year before.

Which is like what the case seems like for Wonho, Minhyuk and Kihyun. They’re all born the same year, but technically Wonho is part of 1992, so Minhyuk and Kihyun have to address him as their hyung.

But! Just because you’re born in January or February doesn’t automatically make you older than those born in the same year. For example, say Minhyuk was born before Wonho in the same year. If his parents didn’t decide that he was born “early”, then he’d be grouped with those born in 1993, and Wonho would still be older than him regarding Korean culture.

I’m also aware that I said “early January” and “early February” but Wonho was born in March. He was born March 1, though and that’s still pretty close to February so I’m guessing it’s an exception.

I know that was a lot to digest and there are certain things I’m not 110% sure about either, but confident enough to post it as is. Definitely send in any other questions if you want to. Sorry that the post was so long, I really tried to keep it short, but there are just certain points that need to be made to help make sure that you understand and can grasp the concepts and cultural aspects!

Thanks for asking us and I hope that we were able to help you understand better!

admin d

[hopevalley]

I just want to thank you for keeping this public. I have promoted you on Twitter and will continue to do so. I want to help in any way I can.

I debated all morning on how to reply to this. I know this is reference to Melinda making her blog private for Tumblr users only, and I think it’s important for me to express my opinion on that situation.

But first: thank you for the Twitter promotion! I have a Twitter account, but I admit I rarely use it (because I find it confusing to use lol). It’s @july_skies !

Regarding Melinda’s decision to privatize her blog: I support it. She works hard on her content and deserves to feel that people who like it will be capable of supporting it in a direct way (reblogs specifically). Nothing sucks more than making stuff and seeing that nobody’s looking at it or enjoying it, and whether or not that’s what it seems like to (general) you, that’s how it comes across when people don’t reblog her stuff. It’s depressing. It’s like she’s throwing her hard work right into the void.

While I’m on the subject, I’d like to talk about content creation a little more, to help give you guys a better idea of fandom and your place as a consumer of fanworks; I know a lot of you might be new to the concept, and you can’t know if nobody thinks to tell you.

For my “credentials,” let’s just say I’ve been a content creator for more than half my life and there’s something we lifers call fandom participation or fandom engagement. They are more or less the same thing, and the terminology boils down to us answering this question: “How is the fandom at large engaging with our content?”

In the last handful of years, participation is down across the board. When I first got into writing fanfiction I’d get at least 40 comments on anything I wrote. Many of my works ended up with 60+ comments on them! 

Now I’m lucky if anyone comments at all, especially in this fandom. Again, it’s a problem everywhere, but I still get comments on fanfic I posted five years ago in other fandoms; meanwhile, this one remains relatively silent. 

I post on AO3 for two big reasons. 1) ACCESSIBILITY. AO3′s site layout is easy to read! It’s easy to format! It’s friendly to people with issues seeing small print! And then we have 2) I do it to give people the option of commenting anonymously (in case they’re shy or nervous).

Having an account there isn’t required at all. People just choose not to engage with me when I post fanfiction.

It feels bad to spend hours of your time on something only to see 0 notes/comments/likes/reblogs/whatever on it later. Four ‘likes’ doesn’t feel that good either. Did people actually like it? Are they pity-likes? Do they even care? People mindlessly ‘like’ a lot of things; maybe they did that with your content, too. I’m not saying I don’t enjoy seeing ‘likes’ but a ‘like’ is more or less an acknowledgement that they’ve seen the content, not that they enjoyed it or want more of it.

Also, likes/kudos don’t draw in more readers: comments do. When a reader’s scrolling down the front page of their favorite AO3 fandom, they click on the ‘fics that look like they might be ‘good’ and even though it’s not always TRUE that the ‘best’ stories have the most comments, a lot of readers filter by the number of comments! 

Comments tell other readers: this is worth checking out!

Let’s look at a quick example of one of my ‘fics:

This is from my AO3 account, a random WCtH fanfic. It’s not a long one, but it’s not short either. It’s a reasonable read in terms of time spent to read it, and as you can see 185 people clicked on it, 14 people ‘liked’ it (kudos are “likes”), and I have two comments: one of those comments is @trash-god and the other is me replying to her comment.

Her comment isn’t ‘less than’ because she’s a close friend, but she and I spoke at length about this story on Discord and her comment was just a nice little ‘addition’ to that conversation. Sure, the story’s about characters not many people care about, but look at that: 185 hits on the story. 14 likes. And only one person who read it took five seconds to leave a comment? Really? What about the 13 other people who ‘liked’ it?

What this says to me as a creator is that the ONLY person who is going to comment is the one person who might feel obligated to, and if that’s the case, why don’t I just save my stories to show her privately? Why bother posting them out into the void to hear nothing but silence from everyone else?

This is the direction that @whencallstheheart is coming from. What’s the point of spending hours creating these things when nobody interacts with you? Posting to silence feels bad. And look, to put it into perspective, editing gifs to post, writing fanfic, doing write-ups, maintenance of a blog, site, or social media presence: it’s super time-consuming. 

Melinda and I both work full-time jobs as it is. My job hit full busy season and I’m even getting overtime now. I’m in training to take over the department next year and I’m tired at the end of the day. When I get home I have eight cats, a house to take care of, and a spouse, not to mention my in-laws live right next door and need help sometimes. We also have a property we just planted 1500 trees on by hand that we have to monitor, and my husband owns a house we rent to someone that needs work done on it, too. Sometimes, life is busy.

And don’t get me wrong! I enjoy creating, just like I’m sure Melinda does. I feel awful if I can’t “create.”

But if my choices are:

work for five hours on a fanfic or episode write-up only to get 4 likes on it, OR

play a video game or watch a movie or read a book or sit on the deck watchin’ the sun go down while I work on a crocheting project…

The latter definitely appeals to me more knowing I have to get up in the morning to go back to work again. My time is worth something. Neither Melinda nor I are getting paid to create this content. We put it together for free, in what spare time we have, in the midst of our own chaotic lives. My website costs me a chunk of money every year to keep up and running ad-free, and I could get all 1500 trees weeded in the amount of time it takes me to put together an episode write-up or decent fanfic.

All content creators ask for in exchange for their free labor is a sense of community, and that can be anything from:

comments on fanfics you enjoyed, even if they are just to say, “I read this and enjoyed it.” 

messages that say, “I really like how [this edit you did] turned out.”

reblogs on Tumblr, retweets on Twitter, emails to website owners

you can even create your own blog and use it to begin conversations with those creators!

You guys have been pretty good about engaging with the show itself through us, but don’t forget to engage with the content you enjoy seeing that comes about because of the show. 

Fandom content keeps the show alive even when it’s not currently airing, and supporting content creators keeps them creating. Everyone wins, then!

To talk specifically about written content...

Readers are the ones who ensure more material is created. Hands down.

And again: I love writing!! I DO. I’ve been writing seriously for more years of my life than I haven’t been writing seriously! But it’s disheartening to post a fanfic and get my one obligation comment.

Now, it’s fine if you don’t read fanfiction or even enjoy it. It’s also fine if the things I’ve posted aren’t to your specific tastes. Trust me, I get it; nobody is obligated to comment on my fanfiction, and I don’t want anyone to feel that they should be.

But please know this: if you do enjoy something, whether it’s fanfic or edits or something else, you NEED to engage with it, or it WILL disappear. People don’t like talking to walls. It’s frustrating and it isn’t a good use of their time.

(This is one of the reasons I haven’t bothered doing a novelization of the series. It could be fun, but for 0 comments it’s not worth spending the time on.)

Again, you guys have been great when it comes to engaging with the show material, particularly while the show is airing. It’s been fun speculating with you and hearing all of your different thoughts. I know sometimes Tumblr doesn’t make it easy to communicate, either, and you’ve all done a great job of getting around that.

But in between seasons things get slow on this blog and it’s hard for me (or anyone running a blog) to feel motivated to provide content of any sort if you’re not going to take the time to engage in it.

I’ll never mark this blog as private, but if I get to the point where I can’t get any engagement from the fans, I’ll shut it down. The point of having a “fandom blog” is to interact with other fans.

I enjoy providing content to you guys, but if participation drops off to nothing, I’ll be taking that as my signal that the audience is gone and my time would be better spent elsewhere. 

So if you’re here and you’re enjoying things, don’t forget to take a little time out of your day to let your content creators know! Not just me and Melinda, of course, but your favorite people on Instagram, Twitter, and other sites as well. ♥ You might be surprised how happy they’ll be to receive interaction from other fans.

And another plug for fanfiction, because 1) they always get the short end of things considering how hard it is to amass the creative energy necessary to tell a good story, and 2) I noticed it’s the #2 page on my website getting visited: if you’ve enjoyed anything you’ve read for When Calls the Heart, tell the author! Here’s the section for WCtH on AO3! Is English not your native language/you’re not confident in your ability to write English? No worries! I’ve gotten many thoughtful comments in other languages and from people who spoke limited English, and trust me: I treasured every one. If you’re just not sure how to comment on fanfic, send me a message and I’ll give you some tips!

I don’t intend this as a slight against my anonymous friend up there AT ALL; I think it can be hard to be in fandom, especially if you’re newer to the scene. There’s a lot of history that’s long gone by now and missing out on it means it’s harder to step into fandom without also accidentally stepping on toes.

Sometimes we take for granted that we have an almost unlimited supply of fanfiction, gifs, memes, blogs, and so on at our disposal. But none of that comes from thin air and it never did. It’s the cumulative hard work of millions of people throwing their hearts and souls into something they’re passionate about in an effort to engage with other fans.

I hope this helped put things into perspective a bit!! Sending love at all of you that stuck around this far; I know it was quite a bit of a ramble LOL!

[grelleswife]

Thank you for answering!! Um so not much to go on except what I find interest in when it comes to these types of creatures, from folklore and such, like the demon dogs of Japanese lore or kappas, those types of things. But I also love how the fandom interprets demons with their own symbolic animal form. Seb = a crow and claude a spider. So maybe something like that! And I think I'd like some form of feline for this demon oc, but I've never found anything on evil cat spirits in folklore

           (part 2 argh ask limits) so I dunno where to look otherwise besides that, but I know what interest me. Like not only the whole animal thing but the genderfluidness of demonkind perhaps? I could see this being a thing for the feline imp demon character. Argh I'm sorry if this comes off rambling🙈 I just really wanna make this character!             

Hi, nonny! Since I don’t want to unintentionally seize control of this character’s development (this OC is your baby, after all), I’m going to frame my reply as a series of questions and comments for your consideration. Hopefully, these will guide you as you develop your character. Of course, if there’s anything you’d like to discuss further, feel free to message me or send additional asks!

1. You mentioned that this demon will probably be a feline spirit. Does it normally appear as a housecat or one of the big cats (I could see a leopard, jaguar, or tiger having demonic vibes, for instance)? Or does it vacillate among the forms of a few different species? Of course, part of this might depend on the cultural context in which you place your OC and/or whether they need to avoid human detection.

2. Do you want your OC to have an affinity for ordinary felines, i.e. the ability to control their actions or communicate telepathically with them? In my main Sebagrelle AU, for instance, Sebastian has this sort of connection with ravens.

3. When your OC appears in their feline form, do they look completely normal, or is there something “off” about their appearance (six toes on each paw, two tails, red eyes, too many teeth, tiny horns, etc.)? One option could be to have them appear as a black cat (alas, black kitties are often linked to the forces of darkness). However, if you wanted to subvert the reader’s expectations, it might be interesting to have them appear in a more innocent guise, such as a fluffy white kitten (the color of purity).

4. How important is the feline aspect of your OC’s character? For instance, is their appearance always a bit feline (i.e. do they have neko ears even in demonic form)? Were they worshiped as a cat god at one point?

5. Regarding the genderfluid nature of your character, I recommend spending some time thinking about how this fluidity will manifest itself based on your OC’s personality. For example, the way I write him, Sebastian enjoys wearing makeup and feminine-coded clothing on occasion and sometimes alternates between male-presenting and female-presenting forms (hope I’m using the appropriate terminology here; if not, please correct me!).

6. How powerful is your OC in relation to other demons and/or other supernatural beings? Is your OC the demonic equivalent of an “average Joe,” or do they stand out in some way?

7. Most importantly, what vibes are you getting from your character? I know this is a very open-ended question, so allow me to clarify: Do you have any instinctual feelings about your OC’s likes and dislikes, inner qualities, etc.? If so, listen to them! If you follow your character’s lead, it will make your writing and worldbuilding as a whole much stronger. Spend some time “getting to know them.” I’ve found that reblogging and answering those lists of OC asks is a good way to get started.

I hope this helped you, anon! Best of luck! <3 *demon purrs*

[chronicparagon]

Announcement

I know this is a post some people may not like, but after a few recent things that happened such as things I received, I will have to be honest. 

I noticed I got a few new followers, which is great. I love meeting new people, writing new stories, and making new friends. However, after looking at a few things, I feel I must warn everyone. This isn’t to anyone in particular. This is a post I feel I need to make because I feel it’s my right to be comfortable in the things I write. I want to give people a fair warning. 

I’m always willing to write things known as sensitive content. This varies between violence, some gore, and smut. I’m always willing to write with anyone who wants to try things like that with my muse. I try to be a bit adventurous in the drabbles and threads involving these, especially smut. However, I will say this now.

If you are into more extreme fetish rps like watersports, tentacles, anthros, animals and other particular things I won’t mention and want to include that with Harmony: 

You will be very disappointed. 

I can’t do those. I’m sorry, but I can’t. They are against my principles and I don’t care if that makes me boring or “holier than thou.”  Even if it means I’ll be pushed aside or left behind. I still won’t do them. 

I just can’t do them and everyone should accept that. I can do things like dubcon and noncon. In fact, I am pretty open to writing that, but you may be disappointed in that too because I try to be as realistic in those situations as possible, such as dealing with the trauma, the raw emotions, and the consequences victims face from sexual abuse. Like, Har will never love that person who hurt her that way because they took away her dignity and her autonomy. It’s as severe as murder. Any ships including abuse like that are toxic and destructive. 

I am open to monsters, but prefer them to be humanoid or have a human form. Just things like that with animals bother me. What I’m referring to are anons or people who sent things involving actual animals. Any asks involving dogs, horses, etc, will be deleted and the person who sent them will be blocked.

I don’t know if people read my smut, but it’s very different and some people actually don’t like it because of how I approach smut.  I write based on emotions felt at that time, focusing on thoughts, feelings, and I tend to use terminology that I am comfortable with and feel is appropriate. Most of them lean more towards sultry and romantic, even if it may be a casual encounter. So far, I’ve been told that how I write it is great, but I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea.

I work very hard on these posts and I have fun with them. I often reblog smut memes and such to encourage everyone who wants something to send these in because I love writing for other people,  but I will not be writing about the more raunchy things. The reasons are because I am not comfortable with it. It’s not against anyone and what they like. 

You are free to unfollow me if you feel that’s best for you. If you followed me to write with me about the more extreme smut content I mentioned above, please unfollow. I will not answer any asks involving them or reply to threads that throw those in. You are free to still want to keep following and rp with me. Like I said, I’m more than happy to rp with people and write things like smut requests from memes I reblog, but I’m asking you to please respect my wishes for these. I changed my rules involving this, so please look into them. I won’t do watersports, tentacle smut, scat, incest, and bestiality.  If you send me things like that or put that in threads, I will have no choice but to block. I hope you understand that this is for me and not to shame anyone. 

Thank you very much for taking the time to read this. I look forward to working with you. 

[witch-of-letters]

WITIWNU - Part 1/?

Chapter Word Count: 2865

A/N #1: Once again a HUGE ‘Thank you’ to my wonderful Beta (who so generously offered to help me with this) - @team-free-will-you-idjits-67  ! I’m forever grateful for your help.

A/N #2: I took the liberty to use some actual dialogues (but changed them for the story’s purposes) from the last episode of season 10 (found on supernaturalwiki.com, if anyone’s curious).

A/N #3: Program used for the collage is Befunky Collage Maker

Theme song: “Bad Dream” by Ruelle

And don’t forget to write a comment/send a feedback. That’s what keeps me going!

Chapter Links:   (Prologue)  , Chapter 2

“How much longer till we make it?” inquired Dean. The drive was getting too long indeed. Putting up your pointing finger, you pulled out your phone to access Google Maps.

“About 30 or so kilometres,” you answered in a calm manner. You’ve been in the United States for fifteen years, and yet, you’re still refusing to use American terminology.

“English, please.”

“About 19 miles,” you sighed, “Not too far now.”

*****

“I know I’ve already asked you this, but are you sure this is the right way? You going out like this?” After the Mark was transferred over to you, he became more adamant about getting rid of it. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at his behaviour, because after all, you did warn him about the consequences ofbecoming its new host.

“The words I’m about to say sound so usual right now, but I have to do it, Dean. There is another way to lose it, there always is, but it’s not an option right now. Not if we want even more problems upon our shoulders,” you tried to convene how hopeless the current situation was. There was so much you didn’t want to deal with…

“What do you mean? What way?!” he said with a clear note of hope in his voice. Hope, that you wouldn’t have to die or be sealed away forever for the mistake that wasn’t yours to begin with.

You hesitated to tell him the truth. This had to be done by Sam and him alone, even if you were best friends, who always had each other’s back. You knew that his plan would work, but you didn’t trust Rowena to keep her end of the bargain. You knew she would run away with The Book of The Damned the moment the spell was done and over with.

Dean looked at you again. He saw how your lips were moving a little, a clear sign of hesitation, and wanted to know what was on your mind. Would the answer frighten him or anger him even further? In that case, he would rather not know anything. He still felt the pang of an almost unbearable guilt for making you, the woman he loved with all his being, become the martyr instead of him.

“The Book of The Damned,” was your final answer. When you looked at Dean, you saw his jaw clench. Sam was in deep trouble now because Dean explicitly told him not to use that damn thing, no pun intended.

“Damn it!” he punched the steering wheel, making the car swerve a little. There was no surprise there. “I told him to burn that thing to ashes! What was he thinking?!” You put your hand on his shoulder, squeezing it in reassurance.

“He and Cas thought there were no other alternatives, at least none that would leave either you or me alive, that is. And now Sam’s doing everything he can to remove it from me,” you sighed once more,”And to be honest, when I told him not to come looking for me, to leave me alone, he actually looked at me as though I was ripping away his heart. I just couldn’t stand seeing him so devastated.” You quickly blinked your eyes to stop your own tears from falling.

Dean was quick to question you back.”And what about me? Why did you bring me along?” he looked at you in sadness, still hoping you wouldn’t leave him.

“Because we’re both in it. Because we’ve both been under the Mark’s influence. Because I love you too much to just leave without any explanation,” you spoke the last part quietly.”Besides,” you jokingly huffed,”you would try following me into death anyway, and I won’t let you do it. Not if I can help it.” Instead of squirming under your gaze, he bravely faced you, silently telling you that he would not back down from his promise. The rest of your ride was filled with silence.

*****

After a while, you finally arrived at your destination. What looked like an abandoned bar was actually the one that Death loved most - at least back when  people used to go for drinks there. Strangely enough though, the lights were still lit. ‘Huh. Perhaps they’ve been working nonstop since the owner of this place left. Doesn’t look like it was done in a hurry…’ you thought as you walked out of the car, Dean behind you in tow.

“Oi, where are you going?! Who’s going to bring the ingredients inside?! Me alone?!” you motioned to Baby. He rolled his eyes in response but didn’t object in any way.

When you stepped inside, you were met with death-like silence, no pun intended. The place didn’t look or feel eerie though, so you focused only on preparing to summon Death. Before you could begin, you texted Sam to ask about the progress on the Book. Hopefully, it would take awhile for Dean to gather all the things needed for the spell.

You: What’s the progress, Sam? Is everything alright?

He replied immediately.

Sam: We’re fine. We barely managed to get Rowena to agree to perform the spell.

You: What did she ask from you? No, let me guess - she wants The Book of the Damned. How obvious.

Sam: Yes, but not just that. She also wants Nadya’s Codex...and freedom.

You: Of course. She wouldn’t be able to perform the spells, otherwise. As for the other thing - let her walk free. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t want her roaming around freely and doing God knows what, but right now I don’t care about her wants and needs. I know that there’ll be repercussions for this but we’ll deal with them later, just like we always do.

Sam: I’m not even sure what we’re doing is the right thing...but I have no other solutions to offer.

You: There aren’t any. Not ones that wouldn’t turn the world upside down. But there is something bad about it still.

You glanced outside. Dean was still rummaging through the trunk.

Sam: What is it?

You: You remember what I told you about the Mark when Dean was planning to fight Metatron? The Mark is both a lock and a key. Take away one or both, and what happens, Sammy?

Sam:...We’ll unleash something, and it’s not going to be anything good.

You: You catch on quick. It was made by God for a reason - a reason that we don’t know, but it can’t be anything good like you just said. I have a feeling what that might be but I’m not certain.

Sam: We’ll figure something out, Y/N/N. We will.

You: Sure. Now, let me get back to my plan A.

Sam: Wait, what plan A?!

You put your phone away. You didn’t want to tell anything to him, in case that plan went wrong. You were 99% sure it would.

*****

When Dean finally brought everything inside, even the homemade Mexican food, you started drawing a pentagram. Having placed and lit all five candles, you put every ingredient into the metal bowl, chanting the spell all the way. To put a ‘final touch’ to it, Dean lit up a match and threw it into the bowl, ingredients lighting up immediately.

“Well, well, well, I always figured you to be the most sensible one, Miss Ryder. Have you finally considered my proposal?” Death motioned to the Mark on your arm. You looked at it. It was calm, at least for now. “Oh, and is that queso I see?” Dean stepped forward with the tray in his hands.

“Yeah - yes. Homemade by yours truly. All with the bad fat,” he sniffed the food. Normally, you were into spicy food, but right now, you wanted to get this thing over with.

“Consider it an offering,” you walked forward silently. Dean looked at you confusedly.

“For?” he asked. You looked at Death dead in the eye.

“For him to kill me.”

*****

Death picked up a taquito from the tray, now laying on a table nearby. From the way he was munching upon it, he liked the way it tasted. Dean’s always been a good cook, even if he always liked to downplay his cooking skills.

“Wait, what?! Kill you?!” Dean stared at you incredulously, as though you’ve just done the worst thing you could possibly do, and in a way, you did. Death turned his calm gaze towards him, not even bothering to lift up his eyebrows.

“Yes, that’s what I proposed to do,” he looked at you again,”but you’ve twisted my words a little, my dear. I offered to seal you away. That Mark on your arm is the First Curse - nothing can kill you.”

“So you’re saying that you can’t get rid of it. I get it.”

“Actually, I could,” Death put the food away.

“But…”

“Creatio ex nihilo - God created the earth out of nothing - or so your Sunday-school teacher would have you believe.” Death half scoffed at the misinterpretation through religion.

“What, so Genesis is a lie, eh? Shocker,” jabbed in Dean. For a moment, you almost forgot he was there. Death stood up.

“Before there was light, before there was God and the archangels, there wasn't nothing. There was the Darkness, a horribly destructive, amoral force that was beaten back by God and his archangels in a terrible war,” he walked closer to Dean,”God locked the Darkness away where it could do no harm, and he created a Mark that would serve as both lock and key, which he entrusted to his most valued Lieutenant, Lucifer. But the Mark began to assert its own will, revealed itself as a curse, and began to corrupt. Lucifer became jealous of man. God banished Lucifer to Hell. Lucifer passed the Mark to Cain, who passed the Mark to you, the proverbial finger in the dike,” Death finished the last line in Dean’s face, his stare intense. You gasped.

“I knew it! I knew the Mark had a very dark energy about it! This just confirms everything!” You started pacing around the room.

Dean sat down,”Well, that is just fan-friggin-tastic, isn't it?”

“So I could remove the Mark, but only if it is shared with another…to ensure that the lock remains unbroken and the Darkness remains banned.” You turned around and raised an eyebrow.

“But we’ve already done so. Haven’t you noticed?” You pointed at your arm.

“Hmmm, what if I told you I could relocate you somewhere far away, not even on this earth, where you would still be alive, but no longer a danger to yourself or to others?”

Suddenly, Sam entered the bar, looking like he’s been running all the way there. Confusion was clear on all your faces.

“What is this?” Dean stepped forward.

“We need to talk.”

Sam walked towards you with his hand stretched out,”Whatever you are thinking of doing, don't. There is another way. You don't need to go with him. You don't need to die!”

After hearing about Death’s proposal to the Mark issue, he continued,“So, what? He's gonna... Gonna send you into outer space? Is that it?” You sighed heavily. This wasn’t going to be easy to explain. Thankfully, Dean took the conversation over from you.

“No, well, he didn't say outer space.”

“This is madness, Dean!”

“You think I don’t know that, Sam?! Of course, it’s madness for her to get sealed away because of what I’ve done!” Dean angrily brushed his hand through his hair.

“Far from it, I'm afraid,” spoke up Death. Sam looked at him coldly.

“No one's asking you,” Walking up to him, you placed your hand on his forearm.

“Hear him out! Please.”

*****

“Our conundrum is simple, Sam. Your friend cannot be killed, and the Mark cannot be destroyed, not without inciting a far greater evil than any of us have ever known.”

“What evil?” he quietly asked.

“The Darkness.”

“What the hell is that?”

“Well, what does it sound like?” Dean inquired,“Does it sound like a good thing?” All three of you looked at Death, waiting for his answer.

“Even if I remove Y/N from the playing field, we're still left with you two, loyal, dogged Sam and Dean Winchester, who I suspect will never rest until they set their friend free – will never rest until their friend is free of the Mark, which simply cannot happen, lest the Darkness be set free. Then there was that time you stood me up.” He walked closer to the brothers until he was standing right in front of them. Sam turned to you.

“You traded our lives.” Hurt was etched into Sam’s face, causing your own heart to break.  

You refused to look sad in front of Death as you spoke to Sam,“I never wanted to do that in the first place, but what other choice do I-we have, Sam? I'm willing to live with this thing forever, as long as I know that I and it will never hurt another living being.”

“This isn't you, Y/N. This doesn't make any sense.”

“No, it makes perfect sense if you stop thinking about yourself for one damn minute!” You retorted, causing the Mark to flare up immediately.

“It's for the greater good. Once you consider that, this makes all the sense in the world.” Death was quick to remind you of his presence,”But now...we have this little meeting to finish,” he summoned his scythe, the blade’s edge shining in the dim light. You looked at it uneasily, dread filling up your stomach.

“What are you going to with it?”

He looked at you in surprise, figuring you understood the underlying meaning of his little speech earlier. “Why, kill those two, of course!” The brothers’ backs straightened. Your face contorted in shock and anger.

“What?! No! You don’t have to kill them - just teleport them outside this place!” If it were possible, you were sure Death would have yawned.

“My dear, they are men in love,” he explained,”they would stop at nothing to bring you back. I’ve seen that look before, countless of times.” You turned to look at the brothers, silently raising an eyebrow in question. While Dean wore a mask of shock on his face, clearly surprised by Death’s revelation, Sam, on the other hand, looked guilty and embarrassed. “He’s never once told you of his feelings for you, and why would he? He saw how happy his brother was with you. And so I need to take care of the issue,” Death ran his thumb along the sharp blade before whirling it to an attack position.

In your panic, you let the magic flow from you, the scythe momentarily appearing in your hands. Death was not amused by that.

“Now now, Miss Ryder, please return it to me.” You gripped the scythe firmly in your hands and whirled it a little yourself.

“And why would I do that, exactly? So that you can cut them in pieces? Oh, hell no!” Both of them looked at you in worry, ready to step in, if necessary.

“This is getting more than intolerable,” Death’s face turned into a sneer, which would frighten anyone that came across him. He lunged at you, but before he could reach you, you stabbed him with the blade. He looked at you in mild shock, not having expected you to do that. Same with the Winchesters.

You, on the other hand, looked horrified.

******

“You okay?” asked Dean cautiously, as you were still holding Death’s scythe. Realising he was speaking to you, you dropped the blade. You felt like it would actually sting you if you held it longer.

“Does it look like I’m okay?” you spoke resignedly,”The whole plan just went to Hell in a handbasket!” You flipped over a table in frustration. The moment Death turned to ashes, you felt your heart stop. His death wasn’t that shocking to you, but the mere failure of your plan was. Suddenly, you heard a shrieking sound from outside.

“Wait, guys, do you hear that?”

“What?” said Sam. All of a sudden, a red lightning bolt crashed through the roof, stricking your forearm.  Both your arm and the Mark glowed red as itcrackled until the Mark faded away from your skin. Then the lightning flew back the way it came just as suddenly.

“What. The. Hell. Was. That?” Sam brought you into a tight hug.

“This is good. Y/N, this is good. The -- the Mark is off your arm. Nothing crazy happened.”

“Yet. You mean yet.” Before Sam could reply, Dean pointed at the dark cloud moving towards you.

“I think we need to go. Now.” With that, you ran out of the bar, and jumped into Baby. Just as you tried to outrun that thing, the car hit a blasted pothole, making it impossible to drive. You all watch incredulously as the cloud roars towards you for several seconds, before enveloping the car in the darkness.

“Sam?”

“Dean?!

“Y/N!”

The last thing you heard before losing consciousness was a female voice speaking through the darkness.

“Hello, my saviour. I’ve been waiting such a long time to be free.”

WIHIWNU Taglist (feel free to send an ask for me to add/remove you from it): @curly-haired-disaster // @ain-t-bovvered // @coffee-obsessed-writer // @waywardrose13 // @waywardnerd67 // @impala-dreamer // @emptywithout // @undertastic-dork // @carryonmywaywardwriters // @angelkurenai // @supernaturalfreewill // @nakkisalmiakki // @team-free-will-you-idjits-67 // @queen-of-deans-booty // @luciferssugarbabygirl // @spnhollis // @cherry3point14

[jessisthepenguinwhowrites-blog]

Stay Away (Liam Dunbar x Fem!Reader)

Hello!

This was requested on wattpad - I thought I would share it over here as well, I figured some of you might like it.

Requests are open! Not sure what I write for? Check my masterlist for people I have written about, or send me a quick message! Buy me a Ko-fi! :D

"Liam - you really shouldn't be doing this!" I scold as Liam climbs through my bedroom window. "Scott might be home any minute now!"

"I don't care, (Y/N). You said you need me, so here I am. I'll always be here." Liam said as he stood up straight and looked into my eyes. I sent a small smile at him, my heart lifting at his words and I stepped forwards, throwing my arms around his neck.

"I love you, Liam," I whisper in his ear. I feel his arms wrap around my waist as he buries his face in my neck, "I love you too, so much."

*one hour and a half later*

Liam and I lay in my bed, cuddled up and intertwined with each other. My head laying on his chest as his hand combs through my hair.

"(Y/N)! I need your help with some-" Scott burst into my room without knocking on the door. My heart skips a beat or five as Scott stands in the doorway staring at me and Liam.

"Scott-" I start, he hold a hand up, I close my mouth, watching Scott closely. "Get. Out." He says, almost dangerously calm.

"Scott,  please, I-" Liam tries but Scott's eyes turn red and Liam clambers out of my bed. He sends one last glance back at me before he leaves the room followed closely by Scott.

"I don't want to see you anywhere near my younger sister ever again." I heard Scott's voice travel up the staircase in the all but silent house.

"Scott, I'm sorry we didn't tell you. You have to listen to me though - I love him, and he loves me!" I rush out quickly - half of it probably not making any sense - as Scott walks back into my room.

"Liam won't disobey his Alpha. You- If I ever see you anywhere near him ever again I'll make sure you never see him ever again."

*one week later*

"Mini McCall, what's up!" Stiles cheered happily as he stopped at my table in the library, earning looks and grunts of annoyance from the students around us.

"I'm just studying," I lie easily, in truth I've read the same sentence twelve times and I've been staring into space as I think about Liam.

He won't even look at me in the hallway, the lessons we have together are spent on opposite sides of the classroom and I never even catch a glimpse of him at lunch.

"Cool, you mind if I join you? I was hoping you would help me with biology - it's really kicking my ass this semester."

I shake myself free of thoughts of Liam and begin to explain certain terminology to Stiles.

"There you are, Stiles, I've been looking all over for you" Scott's voice interrupts our studying and with a glance at the time I see we've been working for an hour and a half.

"Oh shit! I was meant to pick up food for my dad! Do you guys want a ride home?" Stiles offers, Scott agrees but I shake my head.

"I'm gonna stay back and study a while longer, I'll catch the bus or something." Scott nods and starts out the library.

I look up from the table at the sound of the door closing to see Stiles still stood in front of me. "I'm not sure what's wrong, but it's obviously got to do with Scott, so I'm going to find out.

"Be careful, OK? Just - call me when you're done. I'll give you a ride home - no Scott." I nodded and Stiles waved as he left.

I glanced quickly around the room, not seeing anybody I let a few tears fall down my cheeks before it escalated into a full-blown meltdown as I let out every emotion from the past few days.

"Dammit!" I yelled, hitting the table with my arm - the fresh self-harm scars stinging slightly from the impact.

*two hours later*

"Hey, you ready to come home?" Stiles asked as he answered the phone, I nodded "Yes, please" I whispered.

"I'll be there in five minutes. I'll text you!" Stiles exclaims before hanging up. I sighed, putting my phone in my bag and packing up all my books and papers.

A few moments later my phone dinged, I checked the screen, 'I'm here!' read Stiles' text. I got up quickly, running out the library and down the hall.

"Hey" I greeted Stiles as I slipped into the passenger seat.

"Scott told me that you and Liam broke up" Stiles spoke into the silence enveloping us as he drove away from the school.

"Did he tell you he threatened - more or less - me and Liam to stay away from each other?"

"Is that paint? Tell me that's paint!" Stiles exclaimed dramatically as one of his hands reached over to grab a hold of my left arm. I looked down to see my sleeve tinted with red, I cursed under my breath as I realised the slam on the table must have removed a couple of scabs covering my deeper cuts.

"is this because of Scott?" Stiles asked, "Liam was helping me through it, but now that we can't see each other anymore..."

I looked out the window, seeing we were parked outside my house. "Thanks for the ride, Stiles" I smiled despite the tears forming in my eyes.

*Stiles' POV*

I said nothing as (Y/N) got out of the Jeep, my mind reeling from the discovery of her self-harm. Once she was in the house I counted to ten to give her enough time to reach her room. before I got out myself, slamming the Jeep door behind me.

"Scott!" I call out angrily as I walk towards the front door, Scott walks out, confusion written on his face as he walks towards me.

"Stiles?" He asks cautiously, I'm running my hands through my hair and started pacing in front of him. "Don't you see it?" I asked angrily.

"See what? Stiles, calm down and tell me what's wrong!"

"It's (Y/N)!" I yelled, stopping in my place and turned to face him. "(Y/N)?"

"She's depressed, Scott, for God sake. She's hurting herself and Liam- Liam, he. He was helping her through it?"

"What have I done?"

[getinthefunvee]

mobile-friendly rules

GENERAL INFO

❔ #getinthefunvee

❔ semi-private:  will generally only write with mutuals, but very happy to meet new people.

❔ exclusivity:  is pre-pubescent and used as a cliquey gatekeeping & ostracising mechanism 99% of the time. I do not practice character or ship exclusivity; I will side-eye you if you do, and I will not tolerate it on my dash, and I will lay the verbal smack-down if I see you using it to bully someone else. I've been playing with some muns for nearly 5 years, and at least one for more than a decade; if anyone was going to be an exclusive, it would be those friends, but exclusivity = possessiveness and it's really, really not the way to roll your adult relationships. Note: if you choose to make me your exclusive Tony for any reason (ie, if you generally hate Tony interaction and want to avoid it, emotional safety reasons, whatever) please give me a heads up. Please be aware that, as stated above, I will not do exclusivity in return.

❔ basic etiquette:  human decency is expected. Do not attempt to god-mod (it's so 90s), force-ship, engage in pass-aggro nastiness, harassment, or any other asshattery. Thanks.

❔  Personals et al are very welcome to follow and 'like' RP posts and to reblog non-RP content. Please don't reblog RP threads you aren't participating in; it's creepy, and I will call you out on it.

❔ multi-muse, side & personal journals:  I will not follow you back if you run a multi-muse blog or RP from your persona that heavily features muses from fandoms I’m not familiar withl; I really need to limit dash clutter in order to be able to focus. (ADD & autism are gr8 that way.) That doesn't mean I won't RP with you on your multi-muse blog, and I'm very happy to RP with side blogs, but I will not RP with personals.

❔ OCs, female characters, obscure canon characters:  This shouldn’t need to be said, but: Yes please! I look for fully-formed characters whose creation you've put thought into; this goes for 'popular' canon characters in equal measure.

❔ crossovers:  Please check with me first to make sure I'm familiar with your fandom.

❔ cut your replies:  Please cut your replies & repost asks as new posts when replying. (note: this is not the same as 'read mores'; I'm happy to explain the difference.) I will not follow you if you never cut your replies.

❔  You must have rules or, at the very least, your age stated somewhere on your blog. I will always read your rules before interacting, and I ask that you please do the same.

ABOUT THIS BLOG

❕  est Dec 2012

❕  21 or over for intermittent content which may not always be tagged; I will generally not play with you if you are under 21 as I may not be comfortable writing certain content [because I'll feel like a dinosaur]. I will not RP with anyone under 18 years old, regardless of thread content or your geographical location's 'legal age.' This is not up for discussion, though I'm happy to explain the legal ramifications (for you and your RP partners around the world) of lying about your age. tl;dr I'm not going to jail so you can have smut. Thanks.

❕ safe space:  This blog is fiercely inclusive. I make a point of avoiding ableist or bigoted language and terminology. Please come talk to me in chat or send an ask and tell me if I screw up. note: If you ever need to talk about anything, or if you're having a really bad day, I'm here for you & wouldn't want you to feel alone. Seriously. Come talk to me. I do have chat set to mutuals only thanks to the huge influx of spam messages I was getting, but you can always unfollow me after we’re done talking (I won’t be upset) or send me an ask if that's easier.

❕ triggers:  I will tag genuine triggers when asked (please don't conflate squicks with triggers). I don't have any triggers, but I prefer not to see child abuse, domestic violence, incest, or pregnancy on my dash; if you regularly include that content, I will generally unfollow. Please see below for a comprehensive list. Triggers will be tagged 'triggery thing tw' and added to the tag dump post.

❕ formatting:  usually no fancier than small text +/- 66x66 or 100x100 icon (depending on the size you use), but I will try to match your style. If you need any special formatting to make it easier for you to read, please tell me. I'm very happy to comply.

❕ pre-established relationships:  I'm happy to discuss these.

❕ readmores:  used rarely, but will always use for explicit dubcon/noncon content & graphic stuff.

❕ memes:  generally mutuals only but will always be tagged as 'mutuals only', so if you don't see that, feel free to interact. I do my best to observe reblog karma but don't expect you to; it's all good.

❕ open posts:  will be tagged clearly; generally open only to mutuals, sometimes character-specific (will specify in tags).

❕ shipping:  multiship; not ship exclusive. Shipping is dependent wholly on muse interaction and never guaranteed. Tony is demiromantic and pansexual; he may or may not be open to poly setups depending on verse. He's experimental, inclusive, and flexible. Got a kink? Bring it. BDSM? He'll want to know your safeword. Three/four/eightway? He's probably into it. That in mind, I'm on the ace spectrum (see below) so mature-content threads aren't going to be that common and will generally, though not always, fade to black.

YES PLEASE

✅  duplicates, multiple 'canon' realities, AUs, cross-fandom, What Ifs

✅  crossovers, especially within Marvel & DC

✅  AUs: love, love, love. Give me your tropey coffee shop AU; better yet, give me your research-worthy Mesopotamian AU, time-travel AU, etc. I'm utter trash for Sentinel!verse (and if you don't know what that is, come at me).

✅  plot-development, complex characterization

✅  conscious, intentional, creative abuse of grammar/syntax

✅  any gender identity/lack thereof; sexual orientation/lack thereof; neurodivergent characters; disabled characters

✅  LGBT, non-cis/het, POC, or other minority versions of canonically white cis straight Christian etc characters

✅  female versions of canonically (cis)male characters

✅  dark, edgy, angsty themes up to and including psychological & physical torture, abuse, and character death

✅  complex and conscientious portrayals of trauma and mental health issues

NO THANKS

❎  self-insertion (omnipotent manic pixie Gary-Stu/Mary-Stu characters make me cringe)

❎  pages of ooc

❎  pages of graphic porn

❎  you RP nothing but smut of a variety that squicks me, such as (below) and don't put it behind readmores: - A/B/O, especially if it involves 'mating'/'breeding', pregnancy (esp cis male or cis female pregnancy), etc. Really major squick; - BDSM that uses an abundance of misogynistic language like 'slut'; 'daddy/mommy' themes; pet play; romanticising unhealthy abusive relationships ('50 Shades of Nope' comes to mind) by framing them as consensual BDSM.

❎  consistent grammar/spelling errors (note: ignore if English isn't your primary language; I’m happy to help if that’s something you want, and I speak a few languages so I might be able to RP in your language)

❎  lots of family/baby/child content

❎  'child of'/'sibling of' & non-canon family member/friend characters

❎  anthropomorphic, furry, or 'real people' characters

❎  SuperWhoLock, anime

❎  gatekeeping, canon-snobbery, constant negativity

❎ erasure of any minority group (ie male versions of canonically female characters; suspiciously white FCs for canonically POC characters, etc)

❎ messianic anything; proselytizing

ABOUT THE MUN

✩  ari (aka kai), 30s, London (GMT)

✩  working in medicine, re-qualifying for med school entry; usually not around much Tue-Fri due to work (replies are sometimes queued & I'm usually happy to do short stuff like texts during the week)

✩  thoroughly spoken for; married to cap.co.vu (but thanks for asking *fingerguns*)

✩  introvert:  very social at times (I tend to 'read' as an extrovert), but I need more distance when out of social energy. Feel free to ask me about this. I will love you forever if you respect the need for space, and will not like you very much if you insta-pounce 10x daily when I've gone quiet.

✩  jewitchy = unrepentantly jewish + low-key hedge witch (observant Reform/Conservative Jew; dash of pagan)

✩  grey-a + demi, greyromantic, as impossibly flirty as Tony Stark

✩  ADD, autism (psa: you can be super direct with me), major depressive disorder, EBS (epidermolysis bullosa), mild anxiety (when out of social energy)

✩  sharp-spoken, sharply-dressed, stickler for punctuation, polyglot, menace to society, method RPer, (mostly) good human being, guaranteed at least 80% carbon-based lifeform, will use elbows on the Tube, well-travelled, great ass (thanks, yoga!), hearts horseback riding, BDSM, dismantling the patriarchy

✩  ask box is always open, Discord available by request, IM/chat is gr8

If you feel like it, send me your favourite trope as a way of letting me know you've read these. I'm not going to ask for any sort of specific symbol, codeword, etc to prove it, but I will presume you have and act accordingly. If you feel compelled to acknowledge any specific parts that jump out at you or query something that doesn't sit right with you, we'll probably be bffs.