#so not producing anything new
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He is coloured now!!
#warm colors and all#i think I'll paint Sherlock after this#not very creative these days#so not producing anything new#just painting old sketches#which I find to be surprisingly relaxing#Sherlock holmes#sh#sherlock#holmes#watson#john h watson#dr john watson#my man#acd books#acd watson#acd john watson#acd sherlock holmes#acd sherlock#sherlock fanart#sherlock holmes fanart#sh fanart#sir arthur conan doyle#john watson#johnlock#portrait
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There are more things in the Parable than Stanley knows about. [Blank Scripts AU]
#hoh boy i was going to make a comic to introduce these monsters but#i couldnt help myself and made an animation instead#because i just think they're so neat and cool okay#listen i cant for the life of me just infofump about my AU and OCs#because i just think that making actual content about my lore and stuff will not only raise the chances of people being interested#but also it will also raise my motivation to actually produce more content other than the same old recycled front-facing-profile drawings#i need to get creative with my stuff or I'll also loose interest and I DONT want that#in order to be happy with what i have i cant just think about it and expect to be given something new NOOOO i need to MAKE it ughh#i cant believe in order to get more content out of my own au i would need to draw it and feed myself ugh ugh ugh unbelievable (kidding)#but also#i wanna make a little music video or animation again for youtube#its been a hot while since ive uploaded anything in there at all#maybe an animation reel will do for now?#i hope so :(#because ive been working on expanding the Black Scripts AU#and honestly i dont regret it#i had a lot of fun making up scenarios and comics for Stanley and the Narrator (Black)#but yeah!#apart from this little video#you wont be getting an explanation on what these things are supposed to be#and why theyre there#actually i was originally gonna make this into a full fledge animation with sound effect/music/frame-by-frame movement/etc.#but i got lazy HAHA#tsp blank scripts au#tsp au#the stanley parable#the stanley parable ultra deluxe#tsp
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zero's pressure
#running out of gas. running out of money. out of time. out of energy. i'm running out of everything#and ofc my solution is to. avoid it. ignore it. do nothing productive.#zero's pressure turns into zero pressure#i'm trying to be kind to myself. i really have been trying. but it's hard when youre still headed to 0 on everything with no solution#because of yourself#i cant get a job. my art doesnt bring enough. i cant keep producing new products on the regular. i cant finish major comms on time#what CAN i do?#vent#just some adhd things#and maybe anxiety. and bad stress management#sorry for being so raw on main. its therapeutic even if it doesnt really lead to anything. it does force me to confront my feelings ig#i tend to get a burst of motivation after hitting a low like this but its a constant cycle that in the longterm really doesnt improve.#ill probably get some products done and do some quick comms. just one of those alone can cover gas for me#anyway some positivity to toot my own horn: i love the palette of this piece. went harder than i thought
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Hey so um what if Armand is funding Dr. Bhansali's research into using vampire blood to cure disease, specifically Parkinson's, and had him take blood samples from Daniel when he visited the penthouse?
#Armand visits just a few weeks later to check in and inquire if they need anything#Bhansali gently reminds him that this is a whole new frontier of medical research and these things can take decades to produce results#Armand not so gently reminds him that he doesn't have that kind of time#Bhansali smiles and tells him that Armand already has the power to use his blood to cure his reporter friend's illness if he really wants t#Armand tells him that isn't an option#He leaves feeling more powerless anxious and foolish than when he came in#iwtv spoilers#iwtv#amc iwtv#interview with the vampire#devil's minion#dr. fareed bhansali#the devil's minion#armandaniel#armand#the vampire armand#daniel molloy
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i wish all people who use others' art as a means for financial profit a very fucking kill yourself. i mean it.
#just found out that this one motherfucker was making my skk art into stickers on redbubble and selling them online? with success?#like they were actually making a fucking money from it? money that should be directed towards ME bc those were MY blood sweat and tears#that went into the work. MY talent and skill and experience that i have cultivated over the years to produce something#where does one get the fucking audacity to even COMPREHEND DOING this#i am literally bitter beyond words. absolutely seething with anger#i just. i have no words. this a new level of vile#bsd fandom is absolutely HORRID when it comes to miscrediting and stealing and just overall treating artists like SHIT#i NEVER had a reposting issue when i was in genshin. or persona. or anything else ever#but NOW i have to deal with every other ask in my inbox being like “oh lotus your art was reposted :(”#IM SO FUCKING SICK OF IT
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h-how do you ever finish any of your work? genuine question because you seem to be productive despite your agreste syndrome and I need to learn your ways. but also how do you ever finish any of your work
unclear. last night i stayed up and finished a report worth 25% of my grade at about 5am, arrived on time for my 9am lecture, and spent about half of it zoned out while thinking about seventeen year old emilie agreste. and i was one of the most active participants in the class discussion
#in some ways it IS the move to go to grad school right out of undergrad#because your body can still sort of operate like a college kid#i’m on about 3ish hours of sleep rn and this morning it felt SO over but now i’ve eaten something and we’re so back#i also don’t really do caffeine. except sometimes i’ll go get one of those panera death lemonades#i might be able to snag a short nap before work#but anyway about seventeen year old emilie. i was thinking abt how she was in that movie solitude and adrien said she was seventeen#WAIT. NO. HE SAID SHE WAS SEVENTEEN IN THAT PHOTO ON HIS DESKTOP NOT IN THE MOVIE#well. okay whatever i’m gonna tell you what i was thinking about anyway#OKAY i’m back i just checked the wikipedia page and then i watched the end of gorizilla. to make sure i’m not lying. because i’m normal.#anyway i was thinking about the solitude film and how it’s super rare and old and obscure and whatever. and how apparently#emilie wrote it herself and andre produced it#and i’m thinking about how gabe was discovered by audrey and that’s how he got his start in the fashion industry#so now i’m like?? did gabe and emilie first meet on the set of solitude? because gabe was designing costumes or whatever?#and that’s how audrey found him? have people already thought about this??#also i just checked and it doesn’t say emilie’s last name in the credits and also it’s ‘graham films’ with the twin rings logo m#so i’m assuming she’s still emilie graham de vanily at that point#anyway it comes back to seventeen year old emilie because i started imagining seventeen year old runaway emilie having her new life in pari#after escaping her british nobility life#and the first thing she does is write and star in an original movie. of course.#and she meets this repressed bisexual punk upstart costume designer who is so the opposite of everyone she’s ever known#and he’s immediately so unhealthily obsessed with her. which she appreciates.#and then they proceed to have the most toxic doomed evil relationship of all time#also she gets cheated because once gabe gets money he represses himself SO hard that he is now exactly like all the people emilie grew up w#but at least he’s still obsessed with her#this is what i was thinking about during class today. i don’t know how i get anything done either.#ml#anna rambles#asks
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my toxic trait is that whenever anyone talks about any kind of music i find a way to bring george daniel up
#talk abt ANYTHING and id find a way#“yeah i was listening to lamp's new album yesterday.. really good.” “ohh yeah i love lamp! their production is always so well done.. it's#got such a soft feel to it. i really value production.. not many people do it well. a producer i really like-“#the moment i start talking about production is the moment my friends just close their minds to everything im about to say#its baddddd like on god#blah blah!#george daniel
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How can I bribe you into helping me get a job in the industry, other than promising my undying love, which you already have <3
The industry is horrible and awful, low pay, long hours, no real chance of advancing.
Whenever people touring the station or new interns ask me for advice, I always tell them to change careers lol
#ask#plus; i'm a producer for a statewide channel sure; but it's nothing huge or glam#like;; i've gotten to work with celebrities but that's more luck than normal operations#and i've said 'i don't hate what i'm doing i hate where i do it' so much for so long that i don't even believe it anymore#i would only wish a career in television on people i hate#but i do try to be even minded as best i can; like i'm acutely aware i work in probably one of the most toxic environments in the state#i've been sexually harassed; grabbed; locked in a room and screamed at by a psycho freelance producer#been injured and seen graphic injuries that happened because of incompetence; seen theft and assault#and had the men at work get aggressive with me because i'm the youngest and shortest and only woman#told by management i was only given opportunities because i'm a woman and it looks better for their image if they pretend to put me up fron#had my bosses retaliate against me for refusing to do illegal things for them#to the point where i was below the poverty line for several months because of it#told by hr that i have no right to complain about anything because even though i run their biggest show i'm just a contractor#had my work stolen and other people's names put on it so those people get the emmys that my work has earned#and lied to about pay rates so I wouldn't know I'm paid less than the men who have fewer responsibilities and less experience than i do#and now they're waging a war against LGBT employees by promoting ultra-right viewpoints and banning mentions of pride#so no i really don't want to help bring anyone into this environment#every day driving in and driving home i just think about driving my car into a concrete wall#i'm looking for a new job i promise
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#having such a boomer moment#idk if it's standard practice bc I'm new to gaming but#I'm so baffled why EA gave review copies to fans a WEEK before launch#like it's just a drama and spoiler factory#actual gaming media should have had copies earlier so they can produce actual reviews but like#idgaf what the “”“community council”“”“ has to say about this game lol#I'm going to love it in a completely different way for completely different reasons (cooler ones)#they're almost as irrelevant to me as the alt right grifters#if you have ever posted a video to youtube I do not want your opinion on literally anything ever
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GOD I love my career path BUT ok like. I spent today at an academic conference on epistemic injustice and I LOVE ACADEMIC CRITICISM. I LOVE ACADEMIC THEORY. The problem is I don't want to BE an academic, it looks like it sucks and also I like to have work with clear material impact. but today has scratched an itch I rarely TRULY get to hit and I want ittttttt. I love PHILOSOPHY I love SEMIOTICS I love EPISTEMOLOGY I love THE PRODUCTION AND COMMUNICATION OF IDEAS it is 90% of what I am thinking about at any given time and nobody outside academia is nearly as interested in it as I am, or if they are then we're using mutually incomprehensible frameworks/language.
academia is like welding, wrestling or bricklaying. I want the opportunity to learn the skills and do it as a hobby but I ABSOLUTELY DO NOT want a career in it and the only ways to get at these things seem to be as vocational paths 😭
#red said#HAVING SAID WHICH#the senior lecturer i was talking to did ask quite firmly whether i could come talk to her class in the new year#and i was like frantically backtracking like NO I HAVE LOTS OF THOUGHTS BUT I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING!!!!#which is. ironic. if we're talking about epistemic injustice and how we value different kinds of knowledge#cause what i mean is i don't have any formal credentials.#although also what i mean is i think the way i talk makes people think i do more frontline activism than i do?#I'm IN THE ROOM for a lot of community work but I'm not DOING it#I'm just doing the writeup afterwards and some of the design#which are valuable!!! i would say when I've done community activism work my job is comms and messaging though#like. not producing knowledge but translating it to accessible and persuasive messaging#but tbf the whole conversation we were having was that translation = interpretation = synthesis and theoretical production#so#i catch myself coming and going apparently
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[CN] Victor’s 2023 Qixi Cards + PV Cut
“Even if a thousand years go by, I will still come to your side.”
“If (you) continue like this, I can’t promise I won’t become intoxicated.”
“There are certain stories that will be immortalized in time.”
“If (you) continue like this, I can’t promise I won’t become intoxicated.”
—
#p.s. the literal translation of 2nd line actually goes “At this rate#but I decided to go with that one cause as you can see MC is pouring that wine provocatively LOL so wanted to keep in line with that 😗🫠#ANYWAY I'M BEDAZZLED. DEAD. CAN'T SPEAK. WHY IS HE SO FCKING GORGEOUS IN ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING AKDJDJD#AND THE MLEM HELLO SIIIRRRR 👅👁️👄👁️#i really hope they give MC new sprites for this event CAUSE HOLY GOODNESS SHE IS GORGEOUS#mlqc victor#mlqc li zeyan#mlqc#mr love victor#mr love queen's choice#李泽言#恋与制作人#love and producer#mlqc cn#mlqc spoilers#mlqc translations
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I've got too many games I want to play and not enough free time 😭 I still need to finish my BG3 playthrough but since Endless Ocean: Luminous came out I've been playing a lot of that instead. Also just got back into Wizard101 last night. Started playing House Flipper again last weekend. Still need to finish BOTW so I can start a TOTK playthrough and finish Pokemon Shield so I can start on Pokemon Violet. I've been fighting off the urge to start up a new Skyrim playthrough for weeks. My brother just told me that Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door is getting ported to the Switch. And now I'm suddenly feeling inspired to replay DAI... And throughout all of this I'm also playing the hell out of DragonVale on my phone. Someone just pay me to play video games all day please
#and before anyone suggests it: no i cant try to get into streaming#the way i play video games is extremely frustrating for other people to watch ahdjsksl#no one is going to give me money for producing a video where i spend two hours checking every barrel in the map while juggling my inventory#and then immediately give up on a puzzle and just sit in silence for 30 minutes while i look up a walkthrough instead#i need a situation that pays me $200 a day just to be autistic at the screen alone in the comfort of my own home#rambling#a few years ago i made it a mission to play all of the dragon age games and dlcs in order and i did not complete it#i got all the way to inquisition before i quit#i had already played it on ps3 but i wanted to replay on my new gaming laptop and unfortunately my computer decided it was too complicated#and also i just wanted to play as an elf again and i was resisting that urge bc i played as an elf the first time and wanted something new#so i didnt connect to my character as much#BUT ive learned a lot about optimizing my games from getting bg3 to run on my computer#so i think i could get it to handle dai now. especially if i upgrade to ssd like ive been wanting#and i just saw a dai post on my dash that made me daydream about possible characters and i was struck with inspiration#when i first played through on ps3 i didnt know anything about da lore. it was my first dragon age game#i was just doing whatever i thought seemed coolest#so i basically modeled my inquisitor after my dnd oc and then just picked a vallaslin i thought was pretty#and then when it came time to pick a specialization i was just like 'i mean my hand has rift magic right? seems obvious enough'#but now i know the LORE. and the dalish really interest me. and i want to make an inquisitor thats their own character#i didnt want to replay another elf mage bc i thought it would be too similar#but at the same time i wanted to re-experience dai (and experience trespasser for the first time) now that i knew more about the dalish#(with mods that fix the annoying bits where your character seems to not know about their own religion of course lol...)#i was thinking about that and i just got hit with some inspiration#instead of 'my dnd character but with a cool tattoo and rift magic and they kinda roll with the inquisitor stuff bc idk whats going on'#what if i made a more intentional character with a much different personality and their own backstory#theyre still the first of their clan but i know what that means now so theyre not really into the herald of andraste stuff#theyre a devotee of falon'din with his vallaslin and fittingly choose necromancy specialization (tho theyre annoyed by all the maker talk)#they can look cool and goth and maybe they even make some different choices about the well of sorrows 👀#i could keep rambling but im running out of tags gah#anyways ive got lots of ideas now and i think the playthrough would be unique enough to be worth it
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everyone going "omg a new unit" is so funny. they r going to be so disappointed when it turns out to be 1) prsk pc port or 2) a whole different game vaguely related to prsk
#txt#if it is a new unit ill eat my hat but for now#my bets are on pc port#the fact that sega and kondo (producer) announced it makes it seem pretty big#but game developers also hype up shit idgaf about so#im literally expecting anything But a new unit
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one weird part of my job is sometimes I get little old ladies with sweet hearts poking through the compost box on the bottom of my cart that tell me I shouldn't be throwing away what I am throwing away. Like yeah, I get it. Food waste sucks! I hate throwing anything away. But everything down there is rotting or bruised or withered or just ugly enough that I know it will sit on the shelf until it is rotting, bruised, and withered. I cannot mark it down, and you will not buy it at full price. "But poor people---!" Poor people deserve food that isn't moldy or bruised or withered or ugly! And afaik our company already donates actually edible food to pantries!
#this has happened a handful of times like yes i get it but please understand what you're actually asking for#call corporate if you are unhappy with our compost going to pig farmers as feed.#or that you'd like for us to implement a markdown system for produce (like we already have for meat/bread/etc)#i cannot do anything here store-side#just a vent dont mind meee#u#and jsut. the number of times i've told customers 'yeah this is still fully edible so if it's in your house looking like this then its fine#'but no on is going to buy it looking like this'#ANYWAY while I'm here if that site is still around that sells 'ugly produce' to reduce food waste it is a complete scam#produce is graded and ugly stuff that is still edible goes to plants that turn it into soups or jellies or various other products.#it doesn't get thrown away for being ugly unless it gets to a store and even then we do still try to sell it#and i purposefully put uglier shit where I know it'll get grabbed by ppl who dgaf.#thank you customers who dgaf!!!!!!!!! you're my favorite#ppl who dig to the bottom when there is new shit on the top: please fuck right off. you didn't even look. you didn't even try.
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Can we get a little snippet of STL pretty pleaseeeeeee. I’m about to go back to college as a 28 yo (obviously nothing wrong with that) but something about knowing this fic started when I was in college the first time is making me super emotional and nostalgic. Super excited for the next chappie!!
Congratulations! I went back to uni at 26 and listen, it's so much better when you're older. I had way more fun and way more perspective about what and how I was learning. I also gave 0 shits about what anyone thought of me by, like, mid-second year.
Also wow, I'm horrified that much time has passed. Academically I know I started in 2017 but goddamn, that's a long time. Just redefining the slow burn in new and weird ways, I guess.
(That makes her squeeze her eyes tight because yes, things would be very different. She can still see those old visions, the very first ones, where Alice Cullen smiles across a sticky Formica table at a wary old vampire, and gets her first kiss ten minutes later in a dark alley. The ones where she doesn’t have any scars, and wears new dresses and shiny shoes, and gets to be bashful when the Major’s hand settles against her back. And she wants that kind of different. Not the kind of different that means the Major wouldn’t know her, wouldn’t be with her. That terrifies her.) // (There was a sense of security in it; those days before he started falling apart. She had a certain amount of confidence in her place and that life back then. Chalk-maps and training, the Major’s gaze like a security blanket around her. That there was some kind of respect there, an understanding between them. That they both understand he was her architect; the blank slate of his needs and desires. Now it’s a terrifying thought, that she was so willing to let him bend her to his will that she went in blind. But that’s her thinking back. She’d do it all the same, a hundred times over. Not out of a altruistic desire to protect him. But because she is selfish and he was hers as much as she was his.)
#asks#my fic: shadow to light#if my uni hadn't messed up my assignment dates spectacularly there would be a fresh new chapter on wednesday#instead i'm writing essay drafts; the joys of academia i guess#i mean i'm answering tumblr asks#but priority one is producing two assignments in three days#and listen i refuse any chapter under 10k that just seems stingy especially since we're getting so close to...#mary-alice: i'm allowed to want things again? can't remember anything i ever wanted#also mary-alice: i would like an esme hug and the major. that's it. that's the wishlist
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regulus was given the middle name arcturus at birth and arcturus is the fourth brightest star in the night sky and THIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE BECAUSE as a trans man, he was the fourth in his generation to be afab and so they were essentially like ‘oh shit. we have another one ig’ because sexism, and this absolute bottom-of-the-black-house-barrel situation that regulus found himself in was what eventually turned him into such a strong slytherin, and then into a power-hungry death eater, going so far as to turn his back on the brother he loved for the sake of reputation and duty and most importantly the power he was never given, AND IN CONCLUSION basically trans!regulus makes more sense to me than the canon one in every way shape and form so thank you and good night <3
#poor regulus in his childhood was never first never brightest never best :(#im so obsessed with#trans regulus black#rn#regulus black#trans!regulus#marauders headcannon#regulus black headcanons#im sure this isn’t even news to most people but i felt like a genius putting it together#(i’ve connected the dots / you haven’t connected shit!)#to be clear im certainly not excusing death eater regulus i just love exploring character motivations and how they end up where they do and#regulus black’s moral greyness is so interesting to me#and this makes more sense to me than canon :)#im meant to be writing theses for King Lear rn somebody save me#this paragraph I wrote about a dead gay wizard from the 70s is somehow stronger than anything I have ever produced for my English teacher
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