#so many incredible offensive performances

[cementcornfield]

well. we put up a good fight.

[hurtspideyparker]

Emotional Support Intern Peter Parker

Tony and Peter finally arrive in the large room, polished leather Oxfords and stained-lace Converse making their way through the crowd of professionals. Tony has a hand on Peter's back guiding him, because no matter how many meetings, conferences, and office buildings they traverse together, Peter always manages to get lost the second Tony lets go. 

Thankfully Pepper is easy to spot, shaking hands with some blah blah from wee woo Industries. Her hair is the only splash of colour in the constant white black grey of everyone's pencil skirts and collared shirts. 

"Hi Ms. Potts!" Peter greets as soon as the woman turns and spots them. 

"Hi Peter—Tony. I told you to stop bringing the kid to these things. No offense Peter."

"None taken! You look lovely, did you get your hair done?"

Pepper's hair cascades over her shoulder in perfect curls, splayed out over her white button-up. 

"Yes actually, a trim and some highlights. I think she went shorter than I asked though, because I always get half an inch, and this does not look like half an inch."

Peter steps a bit closer and squints at the piece of copper hair she's holding out. 

"I think it's just because she curled it. You usually get it blow dried after."

"Hm. I think you're right actually."

Tony rolls his eyes, "I'm so glad you guys are having such a great slumber party. C'mon kid I have to avoid that senator and he's starting to glance this way." He tries to head over to some tall plants that happen to be great blind spots. 

"Ah ah ah Tony! We are talking about this. I told you to stop dragging Peter to all of your work responsibilities. I'm sure he's bored to death with these meetings and work events."

"Pep, he's an intern, he's supposed to be bored and taken advantage of. Besides, if you take away my emotional support intern then I simply wouldn't show up! So."

"You aren't even paying him for his time!" Pepper says at the same time Peter mumbles "emotional support intern?"

"Um excuse me, that 3 million dollar suit he stuffs between his math homework and Go-Gurt begs to differ. And anyways, I pay him with experience. I brought him to that seminar in LA on Saturday, and he's following me to Tokyo for that week long conference in July. I highly doubt he's complaining," he squeezes the boy's shoulders, Peter looking up and beaming at him and Pepper. 

"I'm really fine with it Ms. Potts. Besides, the more of these things I go to the more lab time I get!" Peter pipes in.

Pepper glares at Tony. "Really, bribery?" 

"Okay well, if us grown adults don't want to be here how else am I supposed to get a 15 year old to talk about environmental reform to people who don't even believe in climate change." 

Pepper and Tony hold each other's stares.

"You mean he spoke to Mr. Ellis about the generator you designed for his carbon plant, and it didn't end with him calling us a pansy corporation and you calling him a decrepit geezer who's business is the only thing that's going to die quicker than he is?"

There's barely stiffled hope supressed under Pepper's professionalism. 

Tony smirks. "Yep, I think Mr. Ellis even smiled. The kid's got charm! Who knew."

Pepper glances at Peter in consideration. 

"Peter have you ever considered pursuing anything further in business? Engineering is great, but if you really want to be successful it's incredibly important to build interpersonal skills, leadership, and even current market and finance knowledge. I mean you might want to sell your designs one day, or start a company." 

"Oh, I haven't really-"

"You could shadow me! I mean interning with a CEO is a once in a lifetime opportunity, it would give you a glowing resume, and I know a lot more about this stuff than Tony. He didn't even perform his executive duties when he actually was the CEO."

Pepper has that gleam in her eyes, the one she gets when men call her sweetheart, or when Tony isn't even dressed for their reservation that started ten minutes ago. 

It means she's already had the argument in her head. 

Peter is still stuttering, flustered with this side of Pepper. Her business face isn't usually directed at him, and it's a far cry from the woman who sends him home with leftovers from dinner. 

"Wait wait wait, are you trying to steal my intern?" Tony asks incredulously. 

"If anyone even needs an intern Tony it would be me. I have to babysit you and the company, meanwhile you just need him to hand you wrenches. Competent help is hard to find these days and you're wasting his talents." 

"Um, excuse me, he's the only thing keeping me together. You already have your fancy day planner and Excel spreadsheets, I need him to get me out of the house. He's the only thing keeping me a responsible adult, if you take away my emotional support intern then I will not attend a single meeting for the rest of the quarter." 

"You are such a man child!"

"La la la la can't hear youuu," Tony says with his fingers in his ears.

"Um, guys, I think people are staring."

Peter tugs on the corner of Tony's sleeve to get him to unplug his ears, glancing nervously at the groups of people sending them judgemental stares. The three of them give a wave and pleasant smile, most of the crowd continuing to move along on the grey carpet at the sight of their unsettling synchronicity and false turn of the lips. 

Pepper speaks through her teeth, a grin still presented at passers-by. "Fine, you can keep him, but only because he's doing half my job for me. The only person you can emotionally regulate around and it's a teenager. I'm glad you finally found someone who can keep you entertained." 

"Love you too honey," Tony says while putting a hand on the small of her back and kissing her cheek. He sighs, looking around the room at all the government officials who think these tech companies are spying on them. 

Apparently a surveillance state is only cool when they do it to manipulate their incarceration numbers, rig elections and lobby votes, and not for data mining and targeted ads. 

"I say we hit the cheese and crackers, take an awkward amount of sips from those tiny water bottles, and then speak to some old ladies till we have to do our presentation."

"Sounds great Mr. Stark. Will you make sure they don't grab my face again? I smelled like old lady perfume at school and Flash started making fun of me for stealing people's grandmas."

Tony looks into Peter's eyes questioningly and finds nothing but sincerity and resignation in them. 

"Well. Not my fault your cheeks are so gosh darn cute. But I'll do my best," he wraps an arm around the shorter and starts heading through the room again. 

The weight is comforting. Peter used to get anxious at these events, but Tony never leaves his side and is always looking at him like he's the Michaelangelo in the center of every room. He became accustomed to being Mr. Stark's favourite part of the event. While that may not seem difficult, especially considering the droning lectures and snooty company, it always feels special making jokes about people's ridiculous work jargon, and comparing the staleness of crackers at conferences. 

"Emotional support intern huh?" he says smugly. 

Tony glances at him, but instead of scoffing or denying anything, he just speaks with honesty. "You and Pepper are the best, most important things to this company. And to me. I'm really glad you're here kid."

Peter doesn't know what to say. The words stick in his throat while Tony hands him a water bottle with the lid already cracked. 

Peter has super strength; It's completely unnecessary to open his bottle for him. He doesn't point this out. Tony will do it at the next meeting, just like he did at the last one, and Peter will never mention it.

[mayasaurusss]

Transfem Jackie in the wilderness??

The feeling of you.

Contents: female reader, transfeminine Jackie, angst and comfort, internalized guilt, detailed descriptions of feelings, exploring themes of transexuality, 3rd point of view from Jackie's prespective, vanilla smut, gentlia described vaguely. Not really thought plot.

Words count: 7k/ about 12 pages

Author's note: As you read, this is a transfeminine Jackie oneshot. I wanted to explore themes of self hatred in many ways. Since I am not transexual, I based myself on the expereince someone in my life had to describe various moments in this oneshot. If this might be offensive to anyone, please dm me so I can edit this work. This is the first time in an oneshot where I write full on smut. This might not be very 'sexy' then, so forgive me for that. This oneshot contains vanilla-ish sex, so it might not be everyone's cup of tea. Anon, I'm sorry for the several months long wait, but I wanted to be sure to write something in character for Jackie.

To make reading easier: the italics are charcaters thoughts. First half is from Jackie's 3rd pow and second half (from smut onwards) reader's 3rd pov.

Enjoy everyone!

When you joined the Yellowjackets soccer team, you didn't expect to fall heads over heels with its capitan, Jackie Taylor.

It was a rainy November afternoon when you joined. You had seen Jackie walk around school from time to time, but have never interacted with her this close, for all it was worth, you didn't even know she was the soccer team captain. You joined the team some months after your best friend Vanessa did; she had insisted that it was fun and it would build up your confidence. So, you have joined.

Vanessa had talked about your frail character with Jackie before you joined, telling her that you were insecure in your abilities, so, after the coach had tested you, Jackie choosed to assign you the substitute position of right winger. So, you wouldn't have had to play all the time.

Right before you got introduced to the team, Jackie had talked with you. A look of worry was visible in your eyes and Jackie, even if she didn't know you all that well yet, was slightly worried. For you maybe, yes, but also that you could potentially be more of a burden to the team, if you didn't do well enough. After all, Jackie needs to have as many competent people in her team as she can. You need to grow more confident.

So, she had taken you by the arm and led you to a secluded place right outside of the field's entrance. Jackie had looked up at you and smiled kindly, "Well, are you ready to go?". You had felt incredibly scared and apprehensive that day but when you felt Jackie's hand lightly touch yours, trying to get you out of your head, you felt safe, seen.

That was the first instance of your feelings blooming for Jackie. At every game, she did not ever forget to encourage and praise you for your actions. Even when you didn't perform well, you knew Jackie would always be there to make you feel better.

To her surprise, a year after having joined the team, you were almost a completely different person. Confident, strong and willing to stand up for herself and others. Jackie did have to admit that your change was more than welcome. She could never say it out loud, but whenever she saw you in the changing room, her heart skipped a beat. Of course, Jackie had to maintain her reputation at school.

No one, besides her parents and Shauna, knew that Jackie wasn't who others thought she was. Since she was a child, she had felt like she was missing a core part of herself. It was when she met Shauna that everything changed: with her, Jackie had confessed her worries and secrets and in exchange, got the help to finally become her true self. Her parents weren't as supportive as she thought they were going to be. Sometimes, she saw her mothers sending glances in her direction, which she couldn't decipher as worry or disdain; but she didn't care.

In an attempt to finally convey that image she built of herself, upon entering her new school alongside Shauna, she had seduced Jeff, one of the guys she found less ugly. She wasn't able to fully explore herself before jumping hand in hand with him in the relationship.

The first time and only time she and Jeff have had sex, she didn't dare to make him look. Somewhat, she managed to create an excuse to not strip and only get him off. It was a rather boring and disappointing night. But she hadn't left him, in a way Jackie still felt some kind of odd feeling when she was with him. She couldn't tell if it was love.

This is why she couldn't show herself shy when she was near you. She couldn't risk her image, people would talk if they saw her behaving in a flirtatious way towards you, and Jeff would leave. She knew he was probably cheating on her, but as of right now, she couldn't worry less.

Jackie feels her mind slipping out of consciousness time and time again. She can vaguely feel what is happening near her, bodies bumping on her shoulder and light dimming lower and lower until, behind her eyelids, she can only stare back at the darkness.

Shauna wakes her up, and she's not sure she's completely herself at this point. Her body moves before her mind can process what's happening and just mere seconds later, she falls hard to the forest floor. Just as her cheek comes into hard contact with the naked soil, her mind registers what's happening. Jackie looks behind herself to see something that shakes her to the core and will for the years to come. People, her teammates flooding away from the main entrance of the plane, all gushing out like droplets of the leftover alcohol of the red cup she had drank from last night, at their last party.

Jackie struggles to get back to her feet, her legs giving just as she gets up. Shauna is there, she holds her and runs her fingers on her face, tracing over the bruise that has begun to form. She searches for your face among the others and finds you clutching at your left leg, a scar running down your hips.

Jackie's eyes follow as Shauna gets back into the plane and a feeling of dread fills her heart. She knows that if she doesn't help Shauna, her best friend will die. When she enters into the crashed death trap smoke fills her lungs and her vision. She searches for Shauna, finding her fiddling with something behind her shoulders. For a second she considers slapping Shauna, telling her that she's an idiot and taking her back, but when she hears Vanessa's desperate sobs her brain is filled with fear and horror and something akin to bravery. Her hands brace on either side of the seats and summoning a bravery she didn't know she had, along with Shauna, Jackie manages to open a window of opportunity for Van to slip out. Once the fresh air fills her lungs again and her brain is awake, Jackie searches for you.

Misty had hastily put together various bandages that ran down the entirety of your leg, blood already seeping out and darkening the cloth. Jackie can't even register that she has you in a death grip until she feels your chest moving on hers in an attempt to get more air in your lungs.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to- '' her words get cut off as you push into her, already wettering the neck of the blue and yellow jacket she wore. Your throat bobs and tears fall from your eyes ``I, I'm scared". Jackie holds you to her chest, sobs threatening to leave her body, "Me too".

The smell of fire and pine needles filled the air around you, the tall trees shielding your view of the night sky. Hours after the disaster, you were surprised to find yourself enjoying your teammates' jokes near the campfire. You would have expected to feel this happy in another situation, but there you were: laughing in the dark night with the corpses of your old friends already starting to decompose back into the deathtrap. Jackie had insisted on sitting near you along Shauna. She kept to herself, having to maintain that image of her authority. Maybe she could be the one aiding the team to take a stand against nature. But in the aftermath of saving Van she had let her selfishness surge again and had protested against her cleanser being used as a sanitizer. She didn't mean to, the words left her mouth before she could understand the gravity of the situation. This wasn't what she was prepared for, her mind wasn't prepared enough to survive, to see the lifeless bodies of her own friends burn and decompose under her eyes.

Jackie had gotten silent for some time and her mouth had tasted the tears that were threatening to fall, but when she had felt your touch linger on her hand, a feeling of calm panic had washed over her. Your eyes stared into hers, understanding, saying 'I feel you, I understand you' and her heart ached. The fear was still clawing at her heart but she tried to subdue it in favor of quietly looking at you, trying to breathe through the hurt. Unbeknownst to her, Shauna's envious eyes had watched the whole interaction with anger boiling over the surface.

That night, Jackie dreams. She dreams of the last game, the leather of the ball comes into hard contact with the white metal of the goal and bounces back away from her and the other team wins. She dreams of a world where she and Shauna are now in her room, sad and bitter, but not here. Not on a cold night. She dreams of a world where she comes back to Jeff, he comforts her by kissing her cheek and whispering sweet, fake nothings to her. She dreams of him finally admitting he cheated, of a world where after months of sadness and thought, she manages to confess the strange feelings she has whenever you're around. She dreams of your lips touching hers.

If only... if only she didn't score, maybe...maybe...

The morning had come by fast, a pale light shone down from the trees and greeted their painful awakening. Jakcie had fallen asleep the night prior cuddled between you and Shauna. All the team had cuddled closer during the night in an effort to maintain as much heat as possible. The soil was scattered with clothes, remaining junk food leftovers, branches and the mechanical remains of the plane. And when she woke up, Jackie had panicked. As quietly as possible she had begun to hyperventilate, the reality of the situation finally kicking in. In an effort to keep calm, to get comforted, Jackie hides her face into your chest and lets her tears fall freely. In your sleep, you cling onto her and for a split moment, her heart bursts out of her chest. It feels like her rib cage has suddenly tightened on her organs and her body has been set aflame. She couldn't feel like this. She shouldn't. And why with you of all people? Why you, and not Jeff? Why you, and not Shauna? What is in you that makes her poor heartache, even in the most desperates of situations? Nevertheless, Jackie allows herself to feel and falls right back asleep. Reality can wait for some time.

When the bodies had been buried and were beginning to dissolve into the earth, a heavy silence had weighted on the team shoulders. At least they could rest in peace, for the rest though only chaos was waiting. Jackie had never been so scared in her life. So, when Taissa shouted that she had seen a lake nearby, Jacki couldn't believe it. Or, more accurately, she was scared of leaving. What if the rescue team came just as they left? And what if they didn't find them? She couldn't afford to lead her team into another hazard. so, when almost all of the team agrees to go, Jackie feels betrayed. It's stupid and selfish but she does, especially when Shauna raises her hand in favor of leaving. Without too much thrust, Jackie follows. She steps away from Shauna and walks with you, helping you move your leg on the uneven forest floor.

When she spots the shore, a sense of wonder and happiness fills her for the first time in hours. With her help, you manage to speed up to the lake. There, a realization dawns on her. She hadn't told the others that she was 'different'. No one here except Shauna knew. What would they have thought of her? "Aren't you going in?" she heard your voice ask her. "Uh, I- I don't know..." she stammers out. Her eyes widen when she sees you changing out of your dirty clothes "Well, I'm going. Misty had said that the water might cleanse my wound, but she never talked about lake water" Jackie vaguely registered your response while her eyes were still trained on your figure. "I hope there aren't any germs there" you lose the branch that supported your uneven walk in favor of trying to get out of your pants.

"Hey Jackie... I know this is weird to ask, but can you help me out? I can't crouch low enough to pull them off" her heart skips a beat and almost automatically, she starts to undress you out of your pants. She's sure her cheeks are a bit more red than usual. "Ah, thank you. Are you sure you're not coming in?" she doesn't know, she isn't sure. But she so, so wants to be there with you. "Uh yeah just, just let me change and I'll be there".

Jackie's eyes follow as you dip into the water. Vaguely, she can feel her blood flow in her body faster than normal, but she dismisses it. When she nears on the shore, as quickly and as carefully as possible, Jackie strips out of her clothes and watches for any unwanted gaze. When the cold water crashes on her skin, her body begins to cool off and that thirst she felt has been quelled. Now she reaches you and guides you to deeper waters, careful to listen to any signs of discomfort from you.

That's how you spend the rest of the afternoon: splashing each other with water, resting on the rocky shores of the lake and gossipping. The everpresent eye of Shauna watching your every move. When Lottie had spotted something in the distance, everyone had been on the move, hoping to find a new shelter for the night. And they did. The cabin was decrepit. Its roof was slightly slanted, vines and vegetation covered the wooden walls; but it worked. It could work. When she entered, a smell of mold and old plants had hit her nose. She found a can of green beans and when attempting to open it, her hunger preceding the thought that maybe she could have preserved it, she was greeted with the sight of many greenish beans swimming in a gray pool of liquid.

On the other side of the room, some of the girls are checking out one of those old sex magazines. Natalie calls out to you "Hey look, this girl kinda looks like you" and right then and there, Jackie crumbles. "Nah, she doesn't look like me! You have a shitty sight Scatorccio '' the team's eyes all gather to one point in the page, some let out whistles while others comment on it. "So, are you like this gentlelady under your clothes?" Van jokingly teases you "Guess you'll have to discover it yourself". Despite thinking she's above this, Jackie steals a glance as she walks out. And it's true, that woman did look like you, despite some differences. And now, Jackie has to deal with yet another problem.

She feels her body shift without her wanting to and heat spreads through her lower abdomen, begging to be put out. She walks out of the door fast and follows a trail behind the cabin. There, she tries to calm down but to no avail, images of you fill her mind and she feels her shorts tighten. Jackie lets out a grunt of discomfort: the situation wasn't exactly the most comfortable one to 'rub one out'. She looks back at the cabin, it's far but still in view: maybe here she can take care of herself with no prying eyes watching.

Jackie slips out of her shorts and starts to palm at her length. She tries to think about Jeff, about Shauna, even about her celebrity crushes, but nothing works. Everything morphs into you. So, when she finally gives up and allows herself to fall into your image, she finds that her body is already at the brink of release. She feels your hands stroking her skin, the tension releases out of her shoulders and your voice whispers reassurances in her ear. "Let it go" and she falls from her high, her legs give out and the skin meets the hard ground. Her gaze falls to her hand. Oh god, what have I done?

The afternoon lights had started to shine through the trees. After taking care of her little problem, Jackie had come back and sat on the wooden porch at the side of the cabin. This can't be real. It can't, right? Her heart aches far more than she realized. She doesn't belong here. She is angry, sad and terrified. This isn't real.

Regret, both for the plane crash and for what she had just done. Did she really jerk off to a friend in the middle of the forest, right after what happened? God, how could she be so disgusting? So careless? People died and all she could think about was fulfilling her own needs. Like always Jackie, you always have to be the center of attention. You couldn't even let your teammates have a peaceful rest, you just had to think about yourself huh? Can you even feel something, anything for others? Do you have anyone else in your mind except yourself?This just shows the utter scum of a person you really are. You waste.

Back at home, everyone always counted on her. She was the voice of reason, the one person who could bring different people together under one team. She had been the one to create the Yellowjackets, to care for them, to nourish them. She knew she was selfish, selfish and stupid, but she really tried. Jackie didn't mean to be this much of a fucking liability, but she couldn't help it. This place, these people, did they even think of her as an equal? Or did most of them fake their appreciation for her? She didn't mean to be a bother, trying to fix the old music player instead of doing the chores, but she needed desperately to not think. Please, for the love of God, get me out of here.

Days, months have passed and winter starts to tighten its cold hands on the Yellowjackets. All of them know. When winter comes, they might die. Every night, the last breeze of autumn comes knocking on the door in the form of the Grim Reaper, begging to be let in. To join the fun. For how much their determination is worth, nature has a sick way of playing with its prey.

They don't have to think.

That's why Jackie had hosted a seance in summer, to distract them. And that's why she decides to host a Doom Coming. Death is already at the door, so why not having fun in the last few weeks of their lives? And her life is just a mess. Jackie feels as if all of the world's faults weigh down on her shoulders. She's sad, bitter and angry: sad for Laura Lee and her unfair death, bitter at Shauna and Jeff, and angry at the world.

Finally, night has fallen. The sun is lowering down the horizon, the cold air nipping at the skin, but she tried to ignore it. The camp smells of leaves, fire and earth. It's almost calming. Laughs and wind and fire crackling fill her ears. Jackie sits on a log which acts as a stool and closes her eyes.

Right now, when everyone is partying, she allows herself to be vulnerable. In the months following the summer, Jackie had come to care less and less about what others might have thought about her if her secret came to be known. So her facade had finally started to crumble.

Jackie sat on the log, her legs spreading far apart, her back hunched and with her face in her hands. She knew the others would look at her and make fun or feel sorry for her, but right now she didn't care too much. A quiet whine left her body and trickles of tears staining her cheeks. Something moves at her right side and she jumps up to see you holding two makeshift wooden bowls. "Hey, thought of giving you this. You haven't eaten at all".

Maybe she doesn't want to. Maybe Jackie would rather die, her body to be eaten by the people she loved most and then dissolve into the earth, broken apart by nature and scattered like a constellation. "I... I am fine" she mutters into her hands, trying to mask her sobs.

"But you're not Jackie. You're so not fine; don't you think I can see that?" she's taken aback by your teary eyes burning a hole through her heart. You push the tears back in and hand her the warm bowl of soup. "I am scared too, Jackie. We all are. But at least, just before the end...won't you try to be happy?" and you know that asking her this is stupid and pathetic, but you too need to push reality away. And Jackie doesn't have enough strength to deny you. "...You're right", she takes the makeshift wooden spoon and dips it into the brownish soup. She lets the earthy flavors fill her mouth. "This isn't half as bad as I thought it would be'' Jackie smiles as she sets the bowl down. A giggle leaves your lips as you stand up, your legs feel wobbly and your skin starts to feel uncomfortably hot. "Say... you wouldn't want to have... a dance with me, would you?" words slurred, you try to pry Jackie out of her log and she happily complies.

Jackie feels strange. She isn't in total control of her body, her mind is foggy, her body moves slowly and lazily. She looks at you with lovey dovey eyes, as if you are a goddess on earth who came to relieve her of her pain. She doesn't even care that Mari's and Alikah's eyes are on both of you; as of right now Jackie only sees you. But now her mind is playing tricks on her: she sees you on her bed, naked.

"W-what?" and now that discomfort is back again, twirling inside of her stomach. "What is it?" Jackie can only feel her body stiffen once again, swaying 'Uhhh shit'. "I- I, don't worry!" but you insist with that look on your face that she can't resist. "What? What is it? Are you feeling ill?".

Shit!. "N-no I-" it's almost like her brain can't form any coherent thought anymore. Why? Why now?!, you get closer to her, an inch from her ear "Do you need something?" God damn it. "I need to- I need-" Jackie stops dead in her tracks as she feels your leg accidentally pressing on her groin. Shit! No! No, no, no! Why?! What is wrong with you?

You look down to see something puffing under her dress. What the heck was she hiding there?. It takes you a moment to understand what it really is, and when you do, you let out a small 'ohh' of understanding.

"Do you have something to tell me?" and Jackie feels embarrassed: embarrassed, guilty and disgusting. How could she have those kinds of thoughts for a friend? She's no better than Jeff, she's no better than them. "I am so, so, so sorry please, please I' didn't mean to-' ' you cut off Jackie with a shush, take her hand into yours and guide her in the forest.

You lead Jackie through low tree branches and vines, through bushes and dirt until you stumble in a beautiful clearing. Hidden between the thick branches of the pine trees, away from the cabin, the uneven forest floor becomes flat, the trees give away to green grass and moss and flowers. On the way, Jackie had noticed strange scrapes on the trees, like a knife had cut through the bark.

"This is where I come when I'm overwhelmed. I found it while having lost myself after going to get the water. You remember that day I didn't come to the cabin after dark?" Jackie nods, waiting for your voice again "I actually had been walking on circles, some feets away from the cabin I took the wrong turn and ended up in the wrong place, here." From your pocket, you fish out a small cutting knife, an old candle and a couple of matches you had stolen from Dead Guy's stash. "Luckily, I had this with me" you gesture to the knife, "If I hadn't, I'm not sure I could have come back". You let your things fall to the base of a tree, forgotten. "So," you say as you sit down and pat the ground next to you "mind explaining what that was?".

Jackie feels as if her blood had become ice cold; she's terrified, so much so that she's stiff and can't bring herself to sit near you. "Come here" she awkwardly lets herself lay on the ground with her legs tucked under her body and away from you.

"I- I am..." throat closing in on her words, she takes a breath and gathers all the courage she has left in her heart "I wasn't happy once. Before. I didn't realized it once, Shauna helped me understand. Sometimes I faked begin happy just to see the people near me happy. To see my parents happy. But once I started to put my own happiness before, I understood". Jackie feels as if a block of ice got stuck in her throat and it's preventing her from speaking clearly.

"For the time we have left, I will continue begin myself. I- I don't care what others think of me" and maybe that last part was a lie, maybe she does care. Every human need reassurance. But when she says that, she's looking directly into your eyes, with determination. A smile graces your lips and Jackie feels as if she has died for a moment and her soul reached heaven "I understand you" which is far better than any 'okays or 'alright's she has gotten so far. "Y-you do? I thought, I thought you would be... grossed out", silence fills the air and Jackie's breath hitches, waiting for the final blow at her heart. "You could never 'gross me out' Jackie, why did you even thought about that?"

"I really thought that you might-" Jackie's words die engulfed in your arm, her head cradled on you, "You are safe with me". Something in her, a cage, breaks into million shining pieces and lets her heart beat red blood into her flesh. Jackie feels as if the old cruel world broke and left space for a new, shining future, one she shares with you. She weeps into your shoulder, finally understood, happy, euphoric, free from her own self and from the world's expectations.

You let her weep into you for some time, the sky's color changes from the purple and orange evening glow to a light cobalt, the stars already starting to show.

"Now, I want to ask you something else..." your cheeks feel suddenly hotter, thighs closing in on themselves. Jackie listens to you, and you're suddenly very interested on your hands. "That... thing that happened back there... why? Why did it happen while we were dancing?". Ohh shiiit.

Jackie feels sick. A ball of nausea forms in the deepest parts of her stomach and reaches out to her mouth. For a second, she feels like she will throw up. "Oh gosh, I'm so sorry I forgot, I-" and now, emotions and feelings of the past months come crashing down on her heart. And when she parts her lips, it is too late to stop.

"I... like you. I do. I've felt like this for a while now. Back there I don't- I don't know why I felt like that and why it happened, but t-that's not like me at all! I- I am-" but the silence that follows is enough for Jackie to stop. Right then and there, she knows she has lost you. "I should probably go..." she says to you; Jackie's muscles move to follow her torso but your arms hug her shoulders before she can escape you. For a moment she's confused and almost thinks an animal might have tackled her to the ground, but when she feels your touch on her cheeks, peace fills her heart. You lightly trace her small skin marks under her eyes and lean down to kiss her. In her eyes billions of stars shine and in her heart, billions of stars explode. Her body is lighter, almost made of condensed air. It almost feels like a sin when she touches your hand: like if her fingertips could dirty the beautiful soul in front of her. "I want you too" you say to her, a whisper. Now she truly is gone.

Jackie kisses you back with a passion you didn't know she had in her. Everything is forgotten: the dirt of the soil, the rotten cabin, the looks of the others, the touches of Jeff, the desire for Shauna, the desire to run from the world. Here and now, Jackie is at peace. Finally at peace, after months of hardship. Her heart beats and her blood runs, and she's happy. So, so very happy.

When you leave the kiss, Jackie feels lightheaded. A dark feeling inside of her screams to stay, to take, to devour. She takes you right back into her arms, clinging to you so hard that you're sure your bones will snap. The kiss becomes raw, hungry and dangerous; all lips and tongue and teeth. Her hand cradles the back of your head and with the free hand, she claws at your shirt. There is a feeling blooming inside her groin and stomach; she wants to devour and be devoured. You get rid of your clothes and discard them aside. Now Jackie can see you in all your beauty, skin shaded by the blue evening night.

It's getting dark.

"Maybe, maybe we shouldn't..." Jackie whispers in your mouth but makes no effort to stop. Your hands find her soft skin, you cradle her head upwards facing you, "Let morning come". Your hands find Jackie's skin underneath her dress and her breath stops, she tries to gulp down air in her lungs but they feel tight. Your hands are just so soft and she feels so good, so right here with you. For the first time in a while, she doesn't have to be in charge of anything. For the first time, she can be her whole, broken self without needing to be something she's not. With a trembling voice, Jackie asks you to help her out of her dress. The cold air hits Jackie all at once, making her shiver but she is too caught up in you to care. As soon as the dress is off her hands are already on your skin, touching wherever they could. "I- I want to..." but she couldn't find in herself the strength to say what she wanted, needed to do. Instead, Jackie decided to crash her lips into yours again and rest her hand on your back, atop the clasps of your bra, a silent request. The dizziness of before had almost worn off by the time you were bare before her. A breathy sigh left Jackie's lips "Wowza...", you couldn't help but let out a giggle "Really? 'Wowza'?".

"What?! I couldn't help it..." her words trail off when her gaze falls to your chest. Fingers come down on you, caressing and touching and groping at every inch of skin she finds. She props you up on her lap, trying to relive the pain of her hardness starting to show. It's almost embarrassing how desperate she is, her cheeks are flushed red, her eyes unfocused and watery. Jackie's lips circle your nipple, biting and licking and sucking and tugging at your skin. Jackie's length gets harder and hard by the minute, for every time her name falls off your lips. All the uncomfortable and guilt has gone, leaving behind something dark and primal. She starts to hump on your ass while continuing to suck on you. "Oh, I see someone is eager" and all that confidence she had goes right out of the window, her sober self comes out more embarrassed than before "Oh- gosh I'm-I am sor-" but she is shut down by your grinding down on her. "Who said you could lead tonight?".

Oh shit I'm so into this.

"N-no one..." her voice came out shaking with excitement, the prospect of the night and all the scenarios playing out in her head.

"That's right, you deserve a break" not as sexy as she would have wanted, but this is fine too. More than fine. She was tired of feigning leadership. Your hands fiddle with the waistband of her underwear, feeling around the skin of her waist. This feels like a torture to Jackie. "Please, I-..." she meets your hands and tries to grind into you. As teasing as ever, your touch skims right on her thighs, squeezing and stroking her skin. "Tsk, I thought you wanted to be taken care of. Maybe I should stop?".

"N-no! No, please I will be good I promise". Jackie settles back against the earth, her puppy eyes looking up at you with the fear that you won't touch her anymore. "That's what I wanted to hear". Finally your fingers dip under her waistband and pull, freeing her after what felt like an eternity. Now, the both of you are bare against each other. "What do you want me to do, Jackie?" after some thought, Jackie says, "I... I want to taste you... Please....".

Now you take her place, laying down on the earth. Jackie watches you with adoration while her fingers start to travel downwards. Her fingers part your legs and she kisses the skin of your thighs, just mere inches away from where you need her the most. You whisper her name, wanting her to get on with it, to please you. At that, Jackie dips into you. After months of desire, it feels like heaven on earth. Her fingers tease your clit, circling it multiple times before moving down. But you're not prepared enough for the intrusion. So, Jackie starts to suck on you. She's so attentive and shy it makes you want to cry. You ground on her face and hear her letting out a whimper, she's getting pleasure from this too. When you are wet enough, Jackie's ring finger teases your opening and enters. You have already done this before, but it pales in comparison on how Jackie is making you feel. Almost like a shock running through your body and a wildfire spreading in your limbs. And you are sure that if Jackie continues, you will combust on the spot. Finger flicking your nipples, tongue occasionally joins her fingers to lick up your slit, eyes always fixated on your face twisted in pleasure. You look under her to see her free hand stroking her length quickly, white wetness dripping from it. "I- I am about to..." but your words die in your throat. When Jackie comes up again, the lower part of her face is covered in your release, she's still stroking herself. "Please, please I need it, I need it" she continued as she came closer to you. "What do you need Jackie?" she whimpers, desperately humping into her hand "y-you please. Your... mouth".

You smile at her, reaching to tease her length but just a few movements of your hand are enough to send her over the edge. Jackie gasps when she comes undone, her hands tightening over your shoulder. "O-Oh God I, I usually last way more than this..." you snort at her, "Hm? Way more?". Her brows are furrowed, cheeks red with embarrassment "...ok, a bit more". You decide to stop teasing her and reach down, sucking the last drops of her release. Her moans encourage you to get on top of her, legs straddling her hips on both sides. Slowly, you began grinding down on her.

"Oh... I like this'' Jackie moans in your mouth, hands exploring every inch of your skin. After what feels like an eternity, you line up Jackie's lengt with your slit, sliding it from under you on purpose and meeting her hips. "Please... stop teasing..." she lets out a grunt, her hands rest steady on your hips and she begins to drag you down on her. You like this double sided version of Jackie. All her dominance goes straight out of the window when she enters you. It takes an unholy amount of strength for Jackie to not start pounding in you, and to keep herself from coming too fast. She pants as if she's shoulder deep inside a pool of cold water, shaky. It's the first time she has reacted this way to having sex. Usually, she could keep a cool, passionate demeanor but she's so excited to do this with you. It feels different from any other casual sex encounters she had.

You still above her. She has reached the deepest point she could, cuddled between dark and hot and wet. It feels too much to you and you rest your head on her shoulders, trying to catch your breath. She is so delicate with you, whispering sweet encouragements on how -"you take me so well", "You can do it" and "I like you so, so much"-. You're the one that starts to move, surprising Jackie who was still in the middle of her praise. Her breath hitches when she feels you move on her, slowly and methodically taking her to the tip and all the way back. This is perfect.

You rest your hands on her shoulder and hers rest on your hips, guiding you back and forth on her. The grip is tight enough that you can feel your skin bruise under her touch. "Fas-faster please..." you try to comply, bouncing on her faster than before, but your legs feel wobbly and uncertain. When she sees that you can't go any faster, Jackie trusts up into you and meets your hips with force, bouncing you up and down. "I-I'm sorry I' can't go slower..." it feels so good you can't really complain about it. Now you have regained enough strength to meet Jackie halfway, both of you lost in a frenzy of pleasure. She's loud, almost yelling and in the back of your mind, you are terrified someone might come and take a look, but another part of you is thrilled at the prospect of begin found out. You are a bit shocked when Jackie's hand comes down on your ass, but you don't complain. If someone walked past you, they would immediately understand what was happening.

The only sounds that can be heard in the forest are your whimpers, moans, the slapping of skin, wind and chirping and, a little farther, yelling and rabid howls of creatures that resemble humans. But that is not important right now. Your minds are too lost in pleasure to think that, in the dark corners of the night, something could wait for the chance to pounce on you.

Jackie starts to move faster than you can keep up. She moves so you lay your back against the dirt and face her. She brings your leg up and opens the space between your thighs more, allowing herself easier access. She begins to pound into you, faster and harder and sloppier than before. She has no rhythm left, no care, only pleasure and the need to relieve both herself and you in her mind. She grabs your leg hard, not letting go in fear that if she does, you might vanish into thin air. "I am close, I am gonna-" she doesn't want to cum, not right now: this moment should last forever. But she can't hold herself back anymore.

From the dark, a pair of brown eyes had spied on the both of you. Shauna was hungry and her hunger was so grand that it made her vision, her brain and the world around her blurry. She was chasing Travis, along the others but had been left behind when she heard sounds coming from behind some bushes. Her mouth had watered thinking it could be an animal but she got let down when she realized the sounds were coming from you. Her initial shock had been replaced by annoyance. She had so hoped to get something beneath her teeth, but to no avail. Then, hate had bubbled its way through her veins and into her heart. She hated you at that moment. The both of you. Shauna couldn't understand if she wanted to be with Jackie or in between you two. Sure, she thought of Jackie before, during the night hours but she hadn't dared to make the first move. And then, when Jackie had gotten with Jeff, she was hellbent on having all of her. She did realize that there was something sparking between the two of you after the first few games, but she kept quiet. She imagined herself, between bodies. Skin and sweat and kisses. She thought of taking Jackie's while kissing you, of guiding your head down, of bending Jackie over and-. Her stomach growled. It was loud enough she could clearly hear it, but not enough for you two to get suspicious of anything. That fantasy of hers would never happen. She retreated back into the dark.

Jackie is moving fast against you, hips slapping repeatedly up on yours and hands reaching every little bit of skin she can. From deep inside her groin, she feels something snap. She's not gentle with you anymore. Something raw and angry has taken control over her brain. Jackie slipped out of you and snuck behind, her arm lifting up your leg before entering once again. In this position she can reach deeper and move faster. She's being too hard on you. A scowl appears on her face when you try to slow her down by slipping from her grasp, "You- you will, you will stay here a-and take-" growling, her fingers grip at your flesh again, harder this time.

A knot snaps inside your guts and without managing to yell a warning, you release on Jackie's. She feels you dripping down on her. Your coming prompts her to do the same: Jackie gives a final long and hard thrust and leaves you empty, releasing on the soil.

She falls on top of you, spent "O-oh wowza. That... that felt amazing". You laugh at her "Again, 'wowza'?! It's not sexy Jackie" she mumbled something back at you and then hid her face in the crook of your neck. You're silent, now left with the remnants of your lovemaking and the constant presence of death looming over you. A faint trace of cold is coming out of the earth and down on you. "What do we do now?" she asks, embracing and shivering against you "Did- did we do something bad? What's gonna happen now? We will all still die-" her voice hitches. She's crying: tears fall down your skin as she nuzzles on it. You take her hand, tracing patterns on it, "We will manage".

Days later, when Jackie finally confronts Shauna, secrets get spilled. Of affairs, of grudges that lasted years, even of your lovemaking with Jackie. She had stormed out of the cabin: just like she feared, everyone had turned on her. Jackie watches the fire, cold seeping in her bones and her mind getting groggy. Shauna walks to Jackie, hand embracing her best friend's back. "Come inside" you say, your features and voice replacing Shauna's. In the back of her mind Jackie wants to preserve her dignity: walking back into the house would mean to admit that she had lost the argument; but staying out here could kill her. Jackie follows you, gripping at your arm tightly. Everyone is asleep; you lead her to rest on one open spot near the fire, finally hugging her cold body to yours. "Rest easy" and she doesn't need to be told twice, falling asleep right away in your arms. Next morning, it was snowing.

[rainbowsky]

Sorry I've taken so long to address this, I've had a very busy day and didn't have time to finish this post (which I started yesterday).

I'm talking, of course, about the incredibly controversial situation surrounding DD right now. I've gotten some messages about it so I figured I'd give my thoughts in a bigger post so that I don't have to keep repeating myself.

(CW: racism, spoilers FPU)

I know that by now most people are aware of the situation, but I'm going to start from square one for those who are just catching up on the topic.

There is a scene in Formed Police Unit where Chinese UN peacekeeping troops need to rescue a group of citizens who are surrounded by terrorists. In order to accomplish this they disguise themselves as people from the community. This being Africa, the troops were disguised using blackface.

Yes, I am saying that DD and his castmates appear in the film in blackface.

I am not going to post a picture of that here. It's just something I can't post on my blog. I understand that many of you will want to see for yourself so I'll link a clip of the scene, which was posted on Weibo. Please be aware before clicking - this is full-on blackface. Always take care of yourselves, and if you think it might be upsetting to you don't click. You don't need to see it to be a 'good fan'.

Background

For those who may not know, this movie was filmed years ago, in 2021. During those years I have seen many anti attacks against DD, claiming that he is racist and has worn blackface. Here's the photo that was circulating back then.

At the time I thought the makeup that he was wearing was likely anti-reflective black paint or camouflage paint such as is used by snipers (which he played in the film). I assumed that he was wearing his own hoodie over part of a military costume, because he was wearing a cammo shirt and what might have been combat trousers.

I was certainly not expecting full-on blackface from this movie.

There's no getting around it - this is extremely difficult to look at.

Blackface is widely viewed as offensive and racist. It shouldn't be hard to understand why. Putting on another person's ethnicity like a costume is deeply insensitive, particularly when you consider that BIPOC (black, indigenous, and other people of color) are so frequently targeted, exploited and marginalized. For those in positions of privilege and power to put on the appearance of the people who they oppress and exploit... it's just shocking and awful.

Blackface is most frequently talked about in an American context, but it's actually a problem globally - including in China. More on all that here.

The film

I have not actually seen the film, so I don't know much about the context beyond what is being discussed in the fandom. As I said earlier, in the film a group of UN police officers need to infiltrate an area in the community, and they take on disguises in order to do so.

In promotional media this film is being presented as based on true stories from real missions*. It seems the situation in question really happened on a Chinese peacekeeping mission, and the UN troops disguised themselves as black citizens in order to infiltrate and extract the endangered captives.

*I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt on this because it doesn't change how I feel it should have been handled.

This is important context that is being conveniently left out of much of the backlash about this situation. People are outright claiming that DD plays a black person in the movie - that he wore blackface to perform a role that a black actor could have played. This simply isn't true, and people making these claims are antis and liars. There's simply no excuse for not knowing the full context.

Having said that, I don't really think it matters how it ended up in the film. I do not think there is such a thing as a palatable or appropriate use of blackface. In this day and age it is nearly universally understood to be racist, and it's extremely controversial.

I can understand if they were trying to be accurate to the mission that they were portraying, but surely there are other ways they could have accomplished this scene (perhaps with the clothing but not the blackface). 'Historical accuracy' isn't as important as cultural sensitivity, not by any stretch of the imagination. In the interest of respecting audiences they could have adapted the scene to make the use of blackface unnecessary.

I really see no excuse for anything like this in 2024.

Audience reactions

Chinese sensibilities around these topics are very different from what we are used to in the West.

According to fan repos audiences initially didn't recognize any of the actors, and once it became apparent that they were in disguise, laughter erupted around the room. In fact, most fans are laughing a lot at the photos and video even on social media (although some Chinese netizens have been upset by it and have voiced complaints to various stakeholders).

It is also being widely discussed on Chinese social media as an exciting scene of heroism in the film.

I feel the need to point out that the laughter and mockery is a huge part of the harm, here. As if it's not bad enough that these actors are performing in blackface and presenting a perversion of black ethnicity, it also becomes an opportunity for audiences to mock and disrespect black people. It's become an opportunity for social media to be filled with racist jokes and mockery.

Roadshow statements

There have been some clips circulating of PR and roadshow moments with black cast members and some black audience members who have spoken up in support of the film and to thank the cast and crew for telling the story. Here's one example.

International fans have been dismissing those statements as ignorant or coerced, which I think is offensive and deeply fucked up. There's no planet on which I'm going to - with a totally straight face - say that a black person's response to the movie is not legitimate just because it doesn't comport with my own view.

This is a complex issue and there are inevitably going to be a lot of different perspectives. I hope people won't exacerbate the problem by supplanting black voices on this issue with their own, no matter what's being said. If there's any manipulation going on, let's assume it was in their choosing supportive black figures to speak for the film rather than claim that the black spokespeople are insincere.

China has a lot of issues with racism, there's no doubt about it. It's a huge part of why so many people try to whiten their skin, or why they mock each other when their skin gets tanned/darker. There is a lot of sinister, fucked up stuff going on in China around race - both in the country and in their dealings with other countries.

But we can't claim to speak for black people in China, particularly when they are speaking for themselves! I would hope this is extremely obvious!

Where's DD in all this?

It's understandable that bystanders will react to what they're seeing and might immediately deem it unacceptable - and DD along with it. Their reactions are valid, but as fans I hope that we can look at him with a bit more empathy. I hope that we can take a moment to try to see things from his perspective.

DD has been interested in and an avid fan of black culture since he was a small child. We've all seen how much he immerses himself in hip hop, street dance and the accompanying music and fashion. And yes, he's been accused of cultural appropriation in the past for wearing locs and durags.

However, I think fans need a bit of perspective here to get a sense of where DD might be coming from. Here's a guy who loves black culture, who has close friends who are black, who regularly works with black artists and who supports black artists, in a culture where racism against black people is prevalent and often extreme.

I think DD would probably be amazed to hear the accusations of racism against him. He likely has very few people in his orbit who are anywhere near as supportive of or as closely connected to black people as he is. He likely stands out in his circle as being particularly into black culture and connected with black artists, and probably regularly faces ignorant questions or digs from people around him about his close association with black artists and culture.

Not just because of racism alone, but also due to the racist parallels the government tends to draw between black culture, street dance, hip hop, etc. and criminality/moral degradation*. It's likely that ignorant people in his orbit have expressed concern or wariness toward him because of these associations.

*That is, until breakdancing became an Olympic sport, then they were suddenly onboard with some of it.

I'm not saying that he doesn't have a lot of learning to do (and if this situation becomes what I think it might become, he'll have a big opportunity to do so), I'm just saying that his ignorance isn't mean-spirited. He's coming at this from a totally different angle than any of us are, and he is immersed in a totally different cultural perspective than our own. In his world, his interest likely makes him a bit of an anomaly.

So those painting him as a horrible racist... it's just not how I see it.

The element of choice

I've heard many people say that DD 'didn't have any choice' about this role, that turning it down would not have been an option or that he would be under some kind of threat if he didn't take this role. I don't agree with that characterization of things. I don't think it's quite as 'gun to the head' as a lot of fans paint it.

I think it's more likely that he simply didn't realize that the role would involve blackface when he accepted it, or that he thought that blackface in this context - to infiltrate a terrorist cell and save civilians - would be fine. We don't need to depict China as forcibly compelling actors to take unwanted roles if we want to make sense of this. There are simpler, more logical explanations.

DD wouldn't have been the one deciding how to depict the scene - he didn't have that power in 2021 - but I also doubt he would have had a major problem with it given everything we know.

We must overcome our Western tendency to see things only from our own perspective. This has a totally different cultural context in China, and the voices we listen to about it should not be issuing exclusively from white faces that are not at ground zero of this situation.

Final thoughts

This film has had me worried from day one. I think most people have been expecting it to be full of offensive portrayals and propagandistic fuckery. There are so many ways in which a Chinese film about the UN is potentially a sticky, tricky mess. This blackface thing is likely just one problem on a towering pile of problems.

However, I'm not going to sugarcoat this - this has the potential to be a real shitshow for DD, and I am concerned. Especially if this film gets an international release.

We need to brace ourselves, because I don't think this is going to just disappear. DD has endorsements with international brands, and this could definitely cause backlash for those brands unless the issue is addressed and the scenes removed. There's no planet on which brands like Chanel and Lacoste can afford to have one of their spokespeople plastered everywhere in blackface.

If this film gets an international release and those scenes are left intact, it's possible he will lose some brands.

Let's hope it doesn't come to that, but let's face it - things like this have consequences, and that's why it's so important for producers and artists to be sensitive about what they're portraying.

While I think there's some endorsement risk here for DD, and the potential loss of some international fans, I want to be clear about one thing: I don't think this will threaten his career overall. In China this just isn't an issue in the way it is internationally.

I do hope the film team addresses this issue in some way, ideally by removing the scenes. They just finished doing a massive edit to remove ZZH from the film, surely they can handle something like this. But let's not hold our breath...

Everyone has the right to make up their minds about DD. As I've often said, being a turtle isn't for the faint of heart. That's not just because turtles are frequent targets for bullies, or because we have to constantly live with uncertainty and doubt.

Being an international turtle also isn't for the faint of heart because there are a lot of cultural and political minefields to navigate, and many ideological differences to adapt to. There's a huge learning curve and a lot of unknowns, and turtles who want to survive have to make peace with the fact that we and the boys are from different worlds in many ways. We may never know where they really stand on issues that are important to us.

However, in this case I feel confident that I know where DD's heart is on this issue. He simply doesn't hold hatred, disrespect or disdain for black people. Quite the contrary.

I think we'd all just feel a lot better if he had a good grasp on how to be a better ally.

And while we're waiting for that, I think we should put our money where our mouths are and learn more about these issues ourselves, both in China and locally at home. We want DD to be a better person; let's be better people too.

Edit: more on this here.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

So, I been curious and I wonder if you have answers; how strong is Idia? I know physically that a new born kitten could woop him, while technology wise not even the master control could stand against him, but what about magic wise? And where does he stand in comparison to the other dorm heads? I know in ch 6 he was strong as heck but isn't that mainly because he was getting energy from the blots?

(Thank you for your time)

Mmm, well... I don't think "magic strength" alone accounts for how good of a mage someone is. You could have all the power in the world but could be a terrible mage just because of how you use it (like if you lack control), or perhaps because you can only cast a few powerful spells before you blow through your energy reserves. All spells are also not made equal; there are defensive spells, offensive spells, healing spells, and more! Because of all that, it's hard for us to really quantify how "strong" a mage is, because really each mage seems to specialize in their own skillsets. It's not "which class is the strongest?" but rather "which class fits your preferred play style?" For this reason, I'm not going to be formally ranking the dorm leaders but instead will point out their strengths and weaknesses.

As Idia points out in book 6:

Riddle has an artificially large magic pool because he started his magical training from a young age. He is capable of casting strong spells and favors offense, but also has low physical stamina and tires easily (from blot accumulation) because he tries to brute-force. His mental state is also said to be heavily impacted by external factors.

Leona can cast spells quickly and effortlessly; his magic pool is described to be "huge", but we don't know how this really relates to the other problem children in terms of scale. He also seems to boast precision, as he can "tailor" his defensive spells' strength to counter his opponents. Because of how efficient Leona is, he barely accumulates unnecessary blot. Stress does not have much effect on how fast he produces blot, but intense emotions do cause a significant spike in him. Additionally, Leona is skilled in flight due to playing magift/spelldrive.

Azul is a relatively slow spellcaster but makes up for that with precision and access to a variety of spells. He watches the flow of a battle, keeps cool, and then plays support/heals as needed. Idia also notes that while Azul can cast many different spells, Azul also does not have a large enough magic pool to support them and so has to be more careful about what and when he uses his magic.

Vil is very stable across the board and is quite resilient to blot. Stress does not have a huge effect on him, but the blot does seem to stick around for longer because of his larger magic pool. Something else to keep in mind is that Vil excels in making potions, which is another form of magic.

Please keep in mind that these refer to mainly COMBAT scenarios, which are not the only cases in which you would use magic... so this isn't an entirely accurate assessment; it's just the most convenient assessment since the game blatantly lays the comparisons out for us. Let's now piece together what we know of the remaining dorm leaders based on lore we have:

Kalim does not strike me as someone who has a particularly large pool of magic (it's never commented on, nor shown). I'd place him at around normal until otherwise refuted by the canon. We know he's not particularly proficient in his studies, as he just barely scrapes by in classes with intense help from Jamil. This may not always translate to poor performance in practical settings, but we also have no standout moments of Kalim pulling off impressive spells or being a notable mage. He also doesn't seem to be aware of the practical or strategic uses for his own UM unless others in his immediate vicinity are in need of large amounts of water. It's possible that he's incredibly powerful, but lacks awareness of how to best utilize his magic.

Malleus is stated in the lore to be one of the top 5 mages in the WORLD. He uses magic on a daily basis and barely blinks an eye to when he does amazing feats like STOPPING TIME ITSELF. Book 7 also reveals to us a hypothesis that fae might have access to an essentially limitless reserve of magic because they pull that magic from nature itself. I'd say that this definitively places Malleus at the top of the "magical power" hierarchy--there was never any doubt about that, the problem just comes in trying to sort everyone else under him.

And then there's Idia, whom we don't really see performing magic much by himself. No, he prefers to tinker with his computer parts which, technically, can count as magic since technomancy is the combination of technology and magic. (Does Ortho count as something resulting from Idia's "magic power"??) It's hard to say.

If I had to guess, I would think Idia is another stable user like Vil but is also highly volatile like Riddle (due to his guilt and grief being the main source of trauma). Idia HAS to cast spells or input magic into his devices because of his curse; if he does not accumulate blot, there's nothing for his curse to dine on... so it'll dine on his own magic instead, which can be detrimental to his health and wellbeing. (This is why the Shrouds are perfect candidates to work at STYX and research blot. All the blot present in STYX HQ fuels them and feeds their curses.) This implies Idia has to have output, and consistent output at that. More blot present in the immediate area may be able to power him up more and allow him to cast more spells/cast spells more frequently, but that's again highly dependent on his environment. Idia has the "flexibility" that the other dorm leaders lack, which can be a curse or a blessing given the scenario. Make of that what you will!

[imaginespazzi]

NIVI!! Give us your postgame thoughts on Ole Miss!!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING MY LOVIES! I am thankful for that fact that I found a stream that worked last night and got to watch this game even though that 3rd quarter took years off of my life.

AZZI. FUDD. I don't think I can even begin to explain in words just how proud I am of her. Everyone has been saying that it's only a matter of time before Azzi starts to contribute (not that she didn't contribute in the Oregon State game) but Azzi didn't just contribute last night; was definitely the biggest (not the only of course) reason we won. It was a one-possession game and momentum was without a doubt on Ole Miss's side and Azzi said fuck all of that and gave UConn an 8-pt cushion all by herself. And what won't reflect on the box-score is that her scoring those points did two things: it deflated Ole Miss and it energized UConn. She was just so good offensively and defensively; just an all-around performance and I'm just so incredibly proud. And you know what the best part is? Those 3s ain't even falling yet.

Casual 29 points for the NPOY, no biggie just Paige doing Paige things except you know MY Paige doesn't normally get 5 turnovers...jk jk because honestly she only should have had 3 (still "high" for her standard but also that's what Ole Miss hangs their hat on). That 1st half and that 4th quarter were just things of beauty. That's what you need your leader to do, set the tone and then finish things off. AND SHE FINALLY GOT SOME FTS!!

Sarah looked really good in the first half and then when Ole Miss got going, she looked a little shaken in the second half, emphasis on the little shaken because it was only really in terms of scoring, she was still doing all the little things. I've seen some discourse and I personally don't want Sarah to stop taking 3s because it's not like she takes bad ones and I think they're gonna fall and we need them to fall and they're not gonna fall if she stops taking them.

JANA!! She had some clutch has hell rebounds and some much-needed shots. I thought she had a really good game and a near double-double. She just looked really energized out there and I think she's only going to get better.

Ice had a up and down game. She definitely did a couple of things that frustrated me but also made some solid plays. I would have definitely liked a couple more points and a couple more rebounds but I think the hustle, that's been prevalent the last few games, is still there.

Ash needed more shots which is partially on her but also I feel like she was getting plays ran for AND her teammates weren't doing the best job of finding her. It feels like the aggression, particularly on offense, of the first two games had dwindled a little bit and she's in a bit of a slump. Also two of Paige's 5 turnovers, probably belong to her because girl what was you doing?

We definitely need more point production from KC but I thought she had a very stabilizing presence last night and did a pretty good job running the offense in the 4th.

KK hadn't made me want to scream at her for driving into traffic and getting blocked like clockwork in a couple of games and so of course OF COURSE she had to do it last night. But I do think she matched Ole Miss's energy well and I liked that one drive she had. She needs to look to score like that more.

Which brings me back to that KC-KK discourse, I still think the KK-Paige-Azzi-Sarah-Jana/Ice lineup is our strongest but I also did really like the KC-Paige-Azzi-Sarah-Jana that we used to end the game and was I believe the prominent lineup throughout the 2nd half. So I think my general opinion is that it doesn't matter who starts because ultimately it's gonna be a opponent-driven decision and it's good to have that option.

I love Paige and Azzi and I love that they had good games but I'm ngl, looking at that box score and seeing so many people with only 2 pts did not please me at all.

Blowing leads is becoming a recurring thing and as much as I think it's good character building for this team right now because as Geno says you learn more from overcoming the Ole Miss run than if you had stretched it 30, it is a little concerning that it's a bit of a pattern. And again this is only their 5th game and it was their first true test and also ofc only their 3rd having Azzi so I'm not necessarily super worried, but it is something I'mma keep my eye on.

But overall I'm just really proud of this team. They got punched in the 3rd and they punched back and I'm hoping to see a lot more punching in the upcoming games.

[mariacallous]

Let me start with the following principle: “Energy is the only universal currency: One of its many forms must be transformed to get anything done.” Economies are just intricate systems set up to do those transformations, and all economically significant energy conversions have (often highly undesirable) environmental impacts. Consequently, as far as the biosphere is concerned, the best anthropogenic energy conversions are those that never take place: No emissions of gases (be they greenhouse or acidifying), no generation of solid or liquid wastes, no destruction of ecosystems. The best way to do this has been to convert energies with higher efficiencies: Without their widespread adoption (be it in large diesel- and jet-engines, combined-cycle gas turbines, light-emitting diodes, smelting of steel, or synthesis of ammonia) we would need to convert significantly more primary energy with all attendant environmental impacts.

Conversely, what then could be more wasteful, more undesirable, and more irrational than negating a large share of these conversion gains by wasting them? Yet precisely this keeps on happening—and to indefensibly high degrees—with all final energy uses. Buildings consume about a fifth of all global energy, but because of inadequate wall and ceiling insulation, single-pane windows and poor ventilation, they waste at least between a fifth to a third of it, as compared with well-designed indoor spaces. A typical SUV is now twice as massive as a common pre-SUV vehicle, and it needs at least a third more energy to perform the same task.

The most offensive of these wasteful practices is our food production. The modern food system (from energies embedded in breeding new varieties, synthesizing fertilizers and other agrochemicals, and making field machinery to energy used in harvesting, transporting, processing, storing, retailing, and cooking) claims close to 20 percent of the world’s fuels and primary electricity—and we waste as much as 40 percent of all produced food. Some food waste is inevitable. The prevailing food waste, however, is more than indefensible. It is, in many ways, criminal.

Combating it is difficult for many reasons. First, there are many ways to waste food: from field losses to spoilage in storage, from perishable seasonal surpluses to keeping “perfect” displays in stores, from oversize portions when eating outside of the home to the decline of home cooking.

Second, food now travels very far before reaching consumers: The average distance a typical food item travels is 1,500 to 2,500 miles before being bought.

Third, it remains too cheap in relation to other expenses. Despite recent food-price increases, families now spend only about 11 percent of their disposable income on food (in 1960 it was about 20 percent). Food-away-from-home spending (typically more wasteful than eating at home) is now more than half of that total. And finally, as consumers, we have an excessive food choice available to us: Just consider that the average American supermarket now carries more than 30,000 food products.

Our society is apparently quite content with wasting 40 percent of the nearly 20 percent of all energy it spends on food. In 2025, unfortunately, this shocking level of waste will not receive more attention. In fact, the situation will only get worse. While we keep pouring billions into the quest for energy “solutions”—ranging from new nuclear reactors (even fusion!) to green hydrogen, all of them carrying their own environmental burdens—in 2025, we will continue to fail addressing the huge waste of food that took so much fuel and electricity to produce.

[folkwhore1998]

All I do is try try try

I will literally never forget the first time I listened to folklore. I went for a walk around the pond outside in my neighborhood and it was cold as hell. It was such a vibe you guys. I would do anything to be able to listen to this album again. Take me to the ponds where all the poets went to die.

It is so different than anything else Taylor Swift has ever done honestly. I feel it is the lyricism of Last Kiss and All Too Well but they were introduced to depression and anxiety. Am I wrong? It is hard for me to say it is an album that divided our fandom because it brought in so many fans, but i also feel there are a lot of fans who prefer other albums over folklore.

I can totally see why and how folklore brought in so many new fans. #1 It is a completely new sound from Taylor (which is how I can maybe see why some people were divided) #2 We were all depressed during COVID and this album was a really good friend to so many people during this time. #3 It took people by surprise because there was no promo for the album. She just said "Here!" I think that there was a lot of curiosity that came with the release which brought in new listeners.

There are two songs on this album I will ride at dawn for: hoax and peace

YOU KNEW THE PASSWORD SO I LET YOU IN THE DOOR. YOU KNEW YOU WON SO WHATS THE POINT OF KEEPING SCORE? I'll admit, I was not always a hoax truther. It just didn't click. But one day I had the album on shuffle and there was a switch that was flipped in my brain and wow it is just so good. Like hello? DID YOU HEAR WHAT SHE SAID?

Peace is such a vulnerable song and we don't talk about that enough. It is like asking am I going to be good enough? but so much more than that. Taylor is a well loved celebrity and it isn't something she cannot change about herself. It is a major part who she is. "Will you accept the intrusive parts of myself and my life that I will never ever be able to change? I would literally die for you and I love your family as my own and I would do anything for you, but is my love enough? I'd also like to talk about epiphany. I personally don't relate to it a lot and I don't listen to it a lot, but I recently saw a video of someone saying "it's the worst song she's ever written" which absolutely infuriated me. Did I rank it last? Yes. I rank everything on how I personally connect with the song, not in terms of "I think this is a bad song." Just because I don't connect, does not mean it is a bad song. It is actually an incredibly deep song that I think resonates with a lot of medical professionals as well as people who lost loved ones during COVID. It talks about a loss so unfathomable or event so traumatic that you literally can't speak about it. And for someone to say it's the worst song she's ever written is honestly senseless and offensive and infuriating. (Respectfully)

☆ Fun fact: Whenever I am showing folklore to someone for the first time, I always play the LPSS version. The vocals are so raw and I feel like you can really feel the lyrics differently, and you can really hear what she just- which I find to be extremely important with this album.

Here are my rankings of

folklore:

illicit affairs

the 1

my tears ricochet

this is me trying

august

peace

betty

hoax

cardigan

mirrorball

the lakes

mad woman

seven

exile (the live version is a different story...one of her best performances)

invisible string

the last great american dynasty

epiphany

Folklore era favs:

lol

MAGICAL

actually sobbing. everything about this. they're all so appreciative and proud. sidenote: one of her best looks ever. dare I say it's my favorite?

no notes.

if you know, you know.

Yes.. I know we need to get through Fall, but it's never too soon to start planning. Taylor said so!

☆ Here is the direct link to the folklore cardigan Christmas ornaments pictured above:

☆ Here is the direct link to the folklore stocking pictured above:

@taylornation @taylorswift

[shsl-hubris-guy]

Best and worst danganronpa trials/chapters?

Oh gosh, I don't know. There are so many to choose from, and while one trial might be total ass, the rest of the chapter can usually hold it up, or vice versa.

Trialwise, I think the best one is definitely 2-5. There's basically no time lost on petty filler and the Soda horniness, while present, is kept to a minimum. Mechanically, it's a pretty decent one to my memory(Hangman's Gambit excluded but face it, that's always the case). The trial remains engaging all the way through, even if you've already figured out the identity of the traitor, and the performance of each of the involved characters is incredible. I'll never get over Chiaki willingly sacrificing herself in the end, or Nagito's plan to kill all the despair by betraying the class, or the insistence from everyone- Sonia, Soda, Akane, Fuyuhiko- that Chiaki couldn't possibly be it, all unconsciously trying to save her since they couldn't last time. #1 trial for me, always

On the inverse, there are 2 candidates for worst trial, and it depends on what you mean by 'worst.' On the one hand, 2-3 is literally physically impossible. I mean, not only does the provided explanation for Mikan's coverup require a level of speed, focus, and dexterity uncharacteristic of a klutz with a deadly disease, it's also just generally physically impossible given the timeframe. I mean, what, you mean to tell me in the time it took for Hajime to sprint to the immediately neighboring motel, scream for help, and turn to leave, Mikan was able to:

tear a ring of wallpaper away from Hiyoko's corpse

fold it and tuck it into the back room

destroy the camera

break and drop the drumstick

line the doorway with glue and let them shut, with enough time to dry and stick together

sprint back inside the hospital before Fuyuhiko got there

and the infuriating one

WALK the perimeter of the island THE LONG WAY AROUND to meet Hajime and Chiaki outside the motel?

Yeah, I call bullshit. It makes no amount of sense no matter how many times you say it. Also, Mikan is treated like shitty fanservice just generally, so a trial in which she's at the center/is the killer should really center on her reclaiming her agency, especially considering her two victims were a) the girl that wanted to take pics of her whenever she tripped into inappropriate positions, and b) her greatest bully on the island. Instead, the whole trial is just about "woah Mikan was crazy ALL ALONG???? OOoooOooOoOOOoooOO scaaaawy disease thing." Which is just plain fucking lazy. And hell, that execution??? What the fuck is that???? One final parting fanservice gift that NO ONE WANTED? Thanks I hate it.

On the other hand, 1-2 is straight up offensive on multiple angles. The introduction of a blatantly ableist DID stereotype with the confirmation of Toko and Genocide Jack, along with the inherent transmisogyny of Chihiro's story and the way all her agency in the narrative is totally stripped from her is egregious. As a trans person, a person with DID, and/or someone who gives even one shit about either/both types of people, the whole thing just makes you wanna throw up. In that sense, it's worse, but at least there, the murder case itself made logical sense. So ultimately, when push comes to shove, I still say 2-3 is worse. I'll take the one that's only offensive over the one that's offensive AND nonsensical. Doesn't treat its victims or killer with respect at all, offensive execution to any victim of SA, and just a fucking PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TRIAL THE HELL-

In terms of overarching chapter, I'm gonna say 2-4 was the best one imo. I quite like the funhouse motive and the conflict it presents, and I think there's a lot of good packed into the chapter as a whole, both in the progression of the story, character development for all involved parties, and the relationships found in it. I think being forced to slowly drag your way to the Final Dead Room as Hajime is great, and Chiaki saving us later becoming the proof against her is just *chef's kiss*. Fuyukane platonic besties 4 life???? Sign me tf up. The fact they were willing to perspective-shift us to Nagito for part of the investigation was incredible too, I love that shit. Also, there was a statue of Sakura. Real shit.

The worst chapter is 1-3. I do not like 1-3. I do not like their lazy asses not even bothering to let us have FTEs with Kiyondo, I do not like turning Hiro and Hifumi into pathetic little jokes and refusing to do more with them in their own chapter(the flashback of Hifumi thinking SA bad is the bare minimum). I do not like the severe tonal whiplash from the emotional turmoil and dark mystery aspects with the Robo Justice "Stand Tall, Galactic Hero!" overly flashy nonsense. I don't like that this was all they wanted to do with Celeste, who objectively would've had more thematic purpose if they'd let her be an overarching antagonist. Hell, the stageplay understood she had more potential, and that shit severely cuts down and rewrites the content for time!

[profoundnightwinner]

i know you’re likely to find this offensive considering the tone you’ve used to respond to similar criticisms, but i genuinely mean no disrespect when i say: liam payne wasn’t a celebrity first, he was a person. i understand why princess diana had the funeral and public mourning that she did, though i think an argument could be made for the fact that she never wanted to be a part of the royal family and therefore, it could be assumed that she likely wouldn’t have loved being mourned the way royal family members are—but she’s a different person and that’s a different situation.

i think it’s been really lovely to see all the memorials popping up for liam and group events that have been held for fans to express their grief with each other. i think it’s also been really nice to see how many heartfelt posts and statements have been made about him, from fans, colleagues, and family members alike. but liam’s funeral is for his loved ones. it is not for anyone who thinks they’re entitled to his family’s grief because they loved his music. privacy is such a gift, and for someone who was torn apart in the public eye so aggressively, i think it’s important that he’s given that gift at his own funeral at least. i think what you’re advocating for is pretty disturbing, and the way you’ve responded to people who’ve said similarly has seemed pretty inappropriate. i’m sure you’ll respond the same way to this, calling me a bitch and critiquing my reading comprehension, but i read every word love, and you’re just in the wrong here. think about if it was you, and maybe the criticism wouldn’t be so befuddling. leaving anon off so you’re welcome to block or speak further if you’d wish.

all the best <3

I am not advocating anything, that's the thing.

I resent being told what I can and cannot want. And there has been so much of that, both in this fandom and on the Internet at large.

You think a private funeral would be best. And I can see your point.

But that is not what I *want*.

Do you understand the difference?

(Not critizing your reading comprehension. *g*)

Do you realize that critizing people for wanting something that is perfectly natural, wanting to say goodbye to a loved one, is wrong? It is simply human nature.

Princess Diana was also a person first, before she was a celebrity. *Every* celebrity is a person first, before they are a celebrity.

(Oh, and Diana would have loved that funeral, mark my words. *g*)

I am not saying anyone is entitled to anything. I am saying the exact opposite. *You* (*nobody*) are entitled to tell anyone what they are allowed to want.

The fandom police/the thought police wants to tell us all how to think, how to feel, that it is wrong to have wants and interests.

It is *okay* to have wants. It is *okay* to have your interest in a matter diverge from someone else's, even if it is someone you respect.

You have to ask yourself—the people who posted that, if they had received an invitation, would they have gone?

I am not advocating anything. I was peacefully minding my own business on the matter when that video started circulating and suddenly there were even more posts going around.

And I am just so incredibly tired of that kind of performative whining. It does no good and does in fact do a great deal of harm (look at the recent election) and it gaslights people into thinking that having a simple wish or want is somehow wrong.

Beloved public figures sometimes get a big public send-off.

There is no harm in quietly, peacefully, respectfully wanting something like that.

We need to stop letting people take our humanity away.

It is only the inhuman ones that want us to stop wanting.

[greeenbeaaan]

What's your favorite scene from any season in Ninjago?

okok i have many scenes in ninjago that i just LOVE but my all time favorite scene has got to be the Oni Temple scene from season 8, episode 7. for multiple reasons:

first off the directing of that scene was phenomenal. the way the camera panned, how sometimes it hovered over the scene, the way everything flowed nicely, THE MUSIC??? I don’t know just every little detail the crew put into that scene was outstanding to me. the way the characters moved and interacted really had me on the edge of my seat the entire time. Lloyd and Harumi are just two characters that every time they’re on screen together, it’s just so gripping and interesting to watch ESPECIALLY in this scene. the way she would cozy up to him and caress his cheek then BAM she’s trying to drive a knife into his side. like wow. or when the camera pans around Lloyd’s head like the gears in his head are turning as he’s piecing together the puzzle in his head about how Harumi is the Quiet One. just everything is fantastic.

the dialogue and voice acting was another thing i absolutely loved. No offense to Jillian Michaels (i love her) but i don’t think having her voice Lloyd for this season and especially this scene would have played out as well as Sam Vincent voicing him. Props to him for real, because the emotion he put into this scene was just so raw and you could really feel the heartache and anger that Lloyd was feeling. And credit doesn’t just go to Sam, it goes to Britt McKillip as well for her performance as Harumi because man- everything she said down to her little voice inflections was phenomenal. how she was able to go from this sweet and caring princess to this just evil and bloodthirsty villain was amazing. there is just so much to say about both of their performances in this scene and this season really.

AND THE MUSIC!! the way it swelled when lloyd was catching onto what was really going on. and if you notice, the music kind of backs off whenever Harumi is gaslighting him to make him believe it’s not her just for the music to kick right back in when he doesn’t fall for it and pushes her away.

i just love hearing Harumi explain all of her motivations for doing what she is doing and having the viewers sit there and be like “well shit i never thought about people dying during the Great Devourer incident” but like dude. people DIED. and we are like Lloyd, who definitely didn’t think about that either and when it hits him you can just see the range of emotions going through him. especially from something he caused (indirectly). like remember when you opened up all the Serpentine tombs? and remember how Pythor unleashed the Great Devourer? yeah people died that day. and yes we know you can’t save everyone and Harumi being a direct result of all of that was perfect.

who knew a like 6 minute scene of just two characters talking to each other could be so gripping? Sons of Garmadon is just incredible and I could talk about it for hours.

i don’t know i just really like this scene a lot and there is so much more i can say but i don’t want this ramble to be too long. long story short, i really love Sons of Garmadon and the Oni Temple scene is my absolute favorite sequence in all of Ninjago. some other favorite scenes i have are Garmadon’s sacrifice in season 4, “why would you touch the scary picture jay” “i didn’t know it would do that cole” in season 5, and literally the last 3 episodes Ninjago Seabound.

[grecoromanyaoi]

According to that one poll something like 75 percent of this website was gifted and in ap classes so it's particularly offensive to act like they only know US history. I mean my school district alternated between us history and world history every year so obviously I can pluck the US information out of my head much faster but does ap world history not ring a bell to you guys. It's okay to admit you forgot everything but I guess that would mean taking responsibility for your own education 🧐

like im sorry but im SURE a large percentage of these ppl r either lying or dont understand what a gifted program is n think they were in one bc they got good grades. like i dont rly talk abt it bc im not an obnoxious asshole but i went to an actual gifted class for years and idk what kind of gifted class theyre talking abt that makes them feel like the smartest specialest guys in the world bc it made me feel dumb n stupid bc i was one of the lowest performing students in there. and, again i dont talk abt it a lot bc im not an obnoxious asshole but im actually rly rly smart in many ways. it was incredibly stressful and competitive n generally made u feel worthless n stupid bc u were surrounded by ppl much faster n more... conventionally smart (and again even conventionally im v intelligent) than u WHO KNOW THAT. n a lot of the teachers enforced that competition n some even picked out or made fun of the "slower" kids. like kids made fun of each other for getting a 98 grade n not 100 yknow. so idfk what kind of gifted class THEY went to that made them feel coddled and jerked them off 24/7 bc thats not my experience AT ALL

[helenhenny66]

15 Reasons Why Lachy is the Best Wiggle (In My Opinion)

Where do I even begin? He’s my #1! Everyone in the Wiggles fandom has a favorite Wiggle, but for me, it’s always been Lachy! I know, at one point Simon was my favorite, but after some thought (and maybe a few too many replays of 'Loch Lomond'), I’ve changed my mind. Lachy has a special place in my heart, and here’s why he’s the best, hands down. -------------

1. His Singing Voice

No offense to the other Wiggles, but Lachy has the best singing voice! Go listen to any of his lead vocal songs, and you'll know what I mean. Seriously, check out the recent remake of "D.O.R.O.T.H.Y. (My Favourite Dinosaur)" or any of the current Wiggles songs where Lachy is singing lead, like "Wiggle Your Ears." And don’t even get me started on "Loch Lomond"—his voice in that song is just angelic. Pure magic. 2. His Curlylocks

Obviously, this one’s a no-brainer. Lachy’s curlylocks are iconic! It pairs so well with his purple skivvy, giving him the perfect mix of adorable and cool. It’s like he was made for that look. 3. His Keyboard Playing

Let’s not forget how talented Lachy is on the keyboard. His keyboard skills are top-notch, and you can tell he’s having a blast while playing. It just adds to his whole vibe.

4. His Calm-like Speaking Voice

Lachy’s speaking voice is so soothing and calm. Don’t believe me? Just check out this clip from Ready Steady Wiggle season 3 (shown above). It’s impossible not to smile when you hear him talk! 5. His Inventing Shtick

Lachy is always coming up with different inventions, even if they usually end up backfiring. The best part? His good-natured attitude about it. The accidents and side effects? Hilarious! 6. His Habit of Sleeping

Okay, this one is just adorable. Watching Lachy take a quick snooze and then hearing the whole crew yell, “WAKE UP, LACHY!!” is honestly one of the cutest things ever. I mean, who doesn't love a sleepyhead with such a sweet disposition? 7. Cuteness Overload

It's impossible not to smile when Lachy is on screen. His energy and sweetness? Straight-up heart-melting. Whether he’s performing, interacting with the kids, or just being himself, Lachy is the definition of adorable. 8. His Warm and Gentle Personality

Lachy’s personality is like a warm hug. He’s calm, kind, and just radiates goodness. Unlike the other Wiggles, who all have their own special qualities, Lachy stands out with his gentle approach to everything. He’s like the soft heart of the group. 9. His Relationship with Emma

Lachy and Emma were the couple! I still ship them—Lemma forever! It breaks my heart that they aren’t together anymore, but that doesn’t stop me from thinking of them as the cutest couple in Wiggle history. #RelationshipGoals 10. "Elephant" (Original by Tame Impala) is a BANGER!!

Can we talk about how incredible Lachy was on Elephant for Triple J's Like a Version in 2021? Keytar in hand, rocking out—he absolutely killed it. Every time I see a picture of him with his keytar, I can’t help but think of that amazing performance. And yes, this was pre-Emma leaving, but that performance was something else! 11. He Should Dance Onstage More Often!

Okay, I’ll say it—Lachy should be dancing onstage more. Every time I see a photo of the current Wiggles on tour, Lachy is always standing tall at his keyboard. Like, come on, show us some of those moves, Lach! 12. The ‘It’s Lachy’ Gag

This one never gets old. The ‘It’s Lachy’ moment when people mispronounce his name (like calling him Lobby or Licorice) is hilarious. His calm response, “It’s Lachy” is always perfect, and it’s a classic running joke that never loses its charm. 13. His Role as a Lead Singer

Sure, the current Wiggles lineup (Tsehay, Simon, Anthony, Evie, Lucia, John, and Caterina) all take turns leading songs, but to me, Lachy will always be the main lead singer. Back in 2017 when Emma was still around, he was the go-to guy for lead vocals, and that hasn’t changed in my mind. He’s the voice of the group. 14. His Spin-Off Special 'Lachy!' from 2017

This special is amazing, and I’ve watched it more times than I can count. From his catchy theme song to the adorable songs in the special, it’s pure joy. "The Gypsy Rover" is still my favorite—especially with Emma playing the princess and Anthony as King Archibald. Classic! 15. He’s the Glue That Keeps the Wiggles Together

Look, Anthony’s the leader, no doubt about it, but Lachy is the heart of the group. He’s the glue that holds everything together, the calm and steady presence that makes the Wiggles feel complete. He might not wear the leader hat, but he’s definitely the one that ties the whole thing together. ------------- So there you have it. Lachy is, without a doubt, the best Wiggle. He’s the whole package—talent, personality, and so much heart. I’m lucky to be a fan. If you aren’t already a Lachy fan, I’d suggest you join the club—you won’t regret it!

[redwineconversation]

spelled out your name and list all the reasons: faint of heart; don't call me back (Lyon - Bayern Postgame Thoughts)

Lyon is at their best when they're like this: a little vexed, a little vengeful, a little bit pissed off. The pace is faster, the passing more accurate, the finishing more clinical. This is a team who needs to be pissed off enough to forget to pretend to be anything than what they really are. They're monsters. They're better for it when they get to act like one.

The thing is, they weren't monsters in the first half, far from it. Spineless, toothless, they resembled more the team from the first half of the 2022/2023 season: a team afraid of shadows, a team afraid of themselves. It was luck, mainly, that had them only down 1-0 at half time. If Harder or Buhl had been more clinical, this would have been a different story.

But they went back to the locker room at half-time and everyone and their mother was screaming at how abysmal the first half was and there are really decent odds that Renard was one of those people screaming. Hegerberg too.

The nice thing about this team is that they listen. They listen when Renard yells at them and they listen when Hegerberg yells at them and they don't like being yelled at by Renard and/or Hegerberg so when that does happen, it whips them into shape and they get better. They fix their mistakes. We saw that in the second half, a vexed, pissed off Lyon, who killed the game off at 3-1 and then scored the fourth just because they were pissed off. Olympique Lyonnais vs Pernille Harder lore is easily one of the best Lyon lores out there and it pains me people don't know/appreciate it enough.

A former Lyon player - I want to say it was Amandine Henry - once said that UWCL games are won by experience. I think she's right. One of the things which makes this Lyon team so, so good is that they have been through so many of these situations before. They know what they're capable of because they have already lived through it. Their football knowledge is pure, is innate. It's one of those things that make them so compelling to watch.

If Chawinga and Diani are finally starting to justify their price tag, questions need to be asked about Marozsan and Damaris respectively. I've long maintained that Lyon needs to offload Marozsan and stand by it. While her technique is exceptional, the fact that she cannot defend and falls apart at the slightest hint of press should be automatically disqualify her as a starter for any high intensity or high stakes games. She is also incredibly slow, which has an adverse reaction when Lyon is either pressing or trying to launch a counter attack.

Lyon desperately needs a decent backup pure DM because I think Damaris has become too comfortable in her position as a certified starter for Lyon. I do maintain that Damaris is world class and I maintain I would rather have her on my team than be playing against her. That still stands. But Jesus Christ her performances have been terrible lately. We saw how much good Huerta did for Carpenter; Lyon needs someone who can do the same for Damaris. We know what that player is capable of so that's why her latest performances have had real Lyon fans recoiling in horror. Damaris can and should be doing so much better. Let's all agree to stop handholding players and actually hold them accountable to their job descriptions.

As terrible as Lyon's midfield has been lately, their offense and defense has not been. And that's something we need to talk about. My stance on Love Island FC stans is well documented by now. I have no qualm about going on record and saying I would have preferred Real Madrid both because they would be "easier" and also because their fan base is nowhere near as morally reprehensible as those godawful Love Island FC stans.

I digress.

Lyon's offense has been on fire lately. Let's call it as it is. Lyon is feeling good about themselves and you can tell that because they are scoring goals because they are pissed off. They don't have to score this many, they're doing it because they can, because they're angry and vexed and maybe because someone got their coffee order wrong. There are a multitude of reasons why Lyon is scoring so much, the simplest explanation is, well, they're doing because they can. And they can because their feelings were hurt for some reason and this is the easiest way for them to deal with it. And to think Manon doesn't see herself as a grief counselor.

People have been praising Lyon's defense and with good cause. Seven goals conceded across all competitions, two of them in the UWCL. That is a really, really stellar defense. It's interesting - but in a way not? - that the defensive line is so good when it is the exact same one as last year. What changed? Not a whole lot. I think the team as a whole is playing better simply because they like Montemurro (you can argue whether it's for better or for worst but that's another topic altogether). The defense is gelling because the team is gelling, and the team is gelling because they're not counting the hours until Bompastor is kicked to the curb. Amazing what a difference a healthy work environment makes.

Looking towards the matchup with Love Island FC - literally according to this press release - I think it's going to be a tough game, albeit for both sides. I think it's pretty much a given that Arsenal will have home team advantage in terms of the referee's decisions, so I would expect a lot of calls in their favor. And Arsenal will definitely have the crowd support behind them (I am also expecting Love Island FC stans to pull a 2024 UWCL final 2.0 where they pretend to be Lyon fans and use Lyon allocated tickets. But I am sure their moral integrity would never dream of doing such a thing)

That being said, while Love Island FC and its fans might be flying high with the confidence of having overcome the goal differential against renown giant Real Madrid Feminin, playing against Lyon in a UWCL semifinal is going to be a little different.

Well, maybe. Let's talk about that too.

They love to harp on about the 5-1 win back in October 2022. You would think they toppled a full strength Lyon and not one that was missing fourteen (14) regular players and whose starting 11 had a mixture of players playing out of position and others coming back from injury. Arsenal were the better team that day, sure, but the mixed team who plays behind your favorite bakery probably could have beaten Lyon that day, too.

If Lyon is at full strength - and I want to emphasize the if - then I do think it's advantage Lyon. Selling out the Emirates and cosplaying as Lyon fans at Groupama Stadium isn't going to phase a team who is used to playing in hostile environment. Lyon has played PSG at a near full capacity Parc des Princes. The Emirates isn't going to phase them. Well, maybe if they start doing shows about being a real life Love Island FC. That might throw Lyon off guard enough to make a difference.

Anyway. Whether or not they sell out the Emirates is kind of neither here nor there. Cool if they do, won't actually affect how Lyon plays. Rah rah go team.

Lyon's midfield isn't great - and I kind of want to put the caveat that if van de Donk is back to full fitness and starts in the place of Marozsan, one of the midfield problems gets solved - but the problem for Arsenal is Lyon's offense and defense. Lyon is really, really good at both. So Arsenal will not have to score - difficult - but also stop Lyon from scoring - also difficult.

Lyon's forwards are really fast. Chawinga is fast, Dumornay is fast, Diani is fast. They're also strong. Two out of the three are also technical. Then you also have Hegerberg who is feeling like herself again, and Lyon's front line is not only heavily stacked, they're also feeling good about themselves. Arsenal got a fair amount of success by double teaming Caicedo but they will have to make some decisions about Lyon's front line. If they double team Chawinga, what are they going to do about Durmonay? Are they going to let Diani do as they please? Decisions will have to be made.

And then Arsenal is going to have to score. Now, both AS Roma and Bayern proved it can be done. You can score on this team. It's just ... really hard to do so. The Gilles-Renard partnership has been exemplary all season. Getting past them is going to be tough. Not impossible, but tough.

One thing I would keep an eye on is Lyon's fitness/injury ratio. Carpenter hasn't fully recovered from the tackle in the first leg against Bayern. I'm curious whether she pops up against Fleury and how much she gets played when she is with the Australian National Team. If Carpenter ends up being out for an extended period of time, Lyon's right side loses some of its natural chemistry with Diani/Carpenter, and also loses speed for counterattacks.

There are a lot of games between now and the first leg of the semifinal. Injuries happen, exhaustion starts to creep in. I'm probably one of the few who doesn't want to say Lyon is already in the final. Things can happen. We know that.

But we also know this team. And that matters, too.

[crow-talks-hockey]

alright. haven't done one of these in a while. here's my top players in each area. (not just this season, but CONSISTENTLY the best in said area)

goal scoring: auston matthews. this one really shouldn't be hard to answer i mean, come on.

points: connor mcdavid, but some others i think are close depending on the season. good point getting is going to come from his play no matter what though.

well-roundedness: nathan mackinnon; he's an excellent passer, scorer, play maker. just all around such a top tier player. both physical and speedy. he is THE blend

defense: cale makar. another obvious one lol. he's just generational. you can't stop him.

goaltending: i'm going to go with andrei vasilevskiy still. just consistent and reliable from what i've seen. he gets the praise for a reason. many goalies are very close though. it's hard to really weigh this one because of how much tending fluctuates year to year

speed: connor mcdavid/nathan mackinnon. both are incredibly quick and actually have a lot closer numbers on average and for their top speed than a lot of people know. their play style is very different but both deserve to be known as the fastest guys out there.

pest behavior: now i'm not talking rat behavior. i'm talking about the ability to propel your team to glory by absolutely irking the opponent. so i'm going to go with matthew tkachuk mostly because he's a better player and pest combo than marchand is. marchand is more rat, matthew has higher playing level.

playoff performance: i'd love to put crosby here, but right now it's wire thin between nathan mackinnon and leon draisaitl. as far as pure scoring and points in the playoffs, it goes to leon. when it comes to the ability to drag a team to a win? i give that part to nate. i always talk about both of them together when mentioning this topic though, so i suppose it's a tie

passing: now THIS one goes purely to leon draisaitl. don't get me wrong there's guys that are close, but holy fuck ain't no one out there passing the way he is. he's excellent at it.

shot (speed/hardness): elias pettersson no comment it's insane argument over

shot (deadliness): david pastrnak, probably :]

defensive forward: patrice bergeron... probably aleksander barkov now, from what i've seen. i'm not very educated on this topic but he seems to trend into this category when talked about often.

defensive defenseman: i'd say devon toews, my favorite underrated king. sorry if this pisses some fans of defenseman off but he doesn't get the credit he deserves. he's very good defensively.

offensive defenseman: either erik karlsson or cale makar. they're always putting up good numbers. it's hard with the regression in ek's season but in his prime? idk. i'd probably still give this one to cale though.

offensive forward: connor mcdavid. shocker lol

skating: there's so many but this also trends in cale's direction for me. i don't think i've genuinely ever seen better edges. maybe datsyuk? either way lmk if there's better skaters out there but.. i'm picking cale again apologies apologies

best player: controversial but this one is a very tight race between mcdavid and mackinnon. again lol. it just depends what you're looking for. they're so much closer than people think but it's hard when their styles are so different. i say mcdavid still for this one, but nate deserves his spot at that "number two" because it's sooooo close. they're both incredible

bonus silly ones now :)

bitchiness: leon draisaitl

hair (not flow, just general amount of hair) : mika zibanejad

shit at media: everyone. congratulations you all get blue ribbons of participation!! you.. you tried!!

goober levels: mitch marner

inseparability: sidney crosby and evgeni malkin and kris letang

weirdness in goalie terms: marc-andre fleury but also all of them

honorable mention picks...

best veteran: we all know. it's sidney fucking crosby and don't even get me STARTED on him anyway

best captain: gabriel landeskog. truthfully but also i'm biased hence why it's here not mixed in with alllllll the others lol

hope you enjoyed my mania

*honorable mention players include mikko rantanen, quinn and jack hughes, adam fox, roman josi, more goalies than i can mention, ovechkin for goal scoring, andrei svechnikov, and so many more because guess what! this league is insane! i could talk about the talent of them all for hours! seasonally or consistently. i love raving about them all. it's very hard to just choose A guy for each category. not enough people see how close many players are to each other in skill levels in my opinion, but then again this is just for fun lol. feel free to debate me i don't mind

[weiszklee]

“If only this fear of resentment might inspire someone to act so as to not inspire resentment. Alas ...”

This is one of the real-er takes on race relations

the roadblock is that the actions that inspired the feared resentment have already taken place.

(This is coming from the perspective of a white guy in the us who was very progressive and lefty when growing up in a red state, went to college in a very very blue state, and got increasingly more “centrist” and ethno-centrist, albeit one who still votes D for labor economics, which arguably benefits a lot of minorities)

what I found was that because I was white, I was innately seen as an enemy, and was consistently unwanted in progressive circles. The amount of performative self-flagellation that was required to fit in socially in those spaces was unpleasant for me to the point that I became very socially isolated. There seemed to be no degree to which a white guy could be seen as “one of the good ones”, and it was a very uncomfortable milieu.

I was also, deeply ironically, subject to a lot of “micro aggressions” dealing with my race, sex, and regional origins. The stress of this was intensified by my pre-dispositions to depression and anxiety, and other emotional trauma I’d been going through in my personal life making me more fragile. I felt unwanted at that school to begin with, and the social justice climate of the day intensified it.

Ironically, it did make me more sympathetic to what it must be like to be a minority in a casually racist area, despite the fact that I was, strictly speaking, in a white majority at that school.

It was a very weird experience, everyone was white, incredibly guilty about that, and wanted you to know about it. Any time there was a problem that fit in with what I felt were my progressive beliefs but contradicted the broader liberal narrative because the victims were white, everyone buried their heads in the sand. I lost a lot of friends over the Rotherham scandals, I felt that protecting young women from sexual violence was a key progressive policy, many in my social circles feared “backlash against other Muslims” if we even admitted it had happened. Similar stuff occurred around various topics in domestic US politics.

so idk what the solution is. Racial tension is a very hard problem. For what it’s worth, I never did vote for Trump, the GOP policy agenda just doesn’t suit me, regardless of their racial pandering being more appealing.

(To be clear, the initial quote is a comment I left on a post about conservatives fearing racial resentment from black people.)

So, I always wonder if experiences like the one you describe are exaggerated or if US universities just really are that different. Certainly people use progressive rhetoric as an excuse to be assholes, and this sucks and is unproductive and worth calling out, but the level of it you describe reads as comical to me.

I am not doubting you that you had a hard time, and I believe you that this was exacerbated by a kind of hostility that is all too normalised in progressive spaces and that I am also pretty critical of. But I highly doubt that you were actually unwanted and seen as the enemy if you didn't actually do anything to warrant this. I would suspect this is either your brain playing tricks on you (which I can emphasise with, I also learned to anticipate rejection) or you doing things you didn't realise were offensive.

Both of these are best solved by actually talking to people. Which is scary and uncomfortable, but there is no way around it I fear. Most people are perfectly willing to discuss the problems (if any) they have with you openly, and to extend grace to people honestly trying to do better. Or, alternatively, to reassure you that yes, you are welcome. And the few who don't, fuck 'em.

Racial tensions are a real problem, and the solution is to not make things like Rotherham about race and to instead talk about the actual systemic failures which led to the scandal. And to realise that it is conservatives who are making it about race.