#so many emotions and reasons for the wings to stay

[blythesarchives]

Limbo | W.S

summary: Not quite Bucky, not quite Soldat, but all yours.

warnings: Smut | 18+ MDNI | Fem!reader | Winter Soldier!Bucky | Post!CATWS | Brief & minor SH | Mentions of HYDRA | Hints of past drugging | Light non-con | Multiple orgasms | Handjob | PiV | Emotional sex

a/n: Oh my god, I have no self control. I love writing WS!Bucky and I'm glad so many people have been enjoying it too. So, I finally got to a smut. I won't write the typical 'aggressive' WS (if I ever do it will be like a blue moon situation) because imo I don't see that, plus...I like this better lol. Edited lightly but ignore any missed mistakes pls ty ;; wc: 5.0k

You felt like your life was a complete mess.

But it was nothing compared to his.

James, Bucky, Soldat...each name he had gave him the same reaction.

Nothing.

His brow might furrow deeply, eyes glazing over with confusion as he stares intently at the floor, his gaze drifting slowly from side to side as if attempting to piece together an impossibly complex puzzle laid out before him. When his name was called, no recognition flickered across his features, no familiar warmth lit up his face.

He wasn't truly any of the identities that had once been his. Not James with his easy smile, not Bucky with his loyal heart, not the cold precision of the Soldat.

Instead, he existed in a nebulous space between all these versions of himself, these names and personas washing over him like waves, each one bringing with it fragments of memories that would surface briefly before slipping away like smoke through his fingers. Nothing concrete would stay, only wisps of who he used to be.

He was stuck, trapped in this liminal space between identities, neither one thing nor another.

You watched helplessly as he struggled, how he would desperately grasp at each fleeting memory that surfaced, trying with all his might to hold onto even the smallest piece of his past. But inevitably, tragically, even these fragments would dissolve like morning mist, leaving him once again adrift in that haunting space between what was and what is, lost in the void between his many selves.

His handwriting often too shaky to make out among the journal’s pages.

For whatever reason, the soldier had taken to you, of all people. Not even Steve could reach him without causing further distress and confusion to the poor man. Heartbreak glossed the blonde’s eyes each time Bucky rejected Steve's gentle advances, careful attempts to trigger some form of memory, some spark of recognition from their shared past, only failed.

Your own heart ached watching these interactions, seeing the pain etched across Steve's features with every failed attempt at connection and the ever growing agitation from the soldier. You didn't want to step between them, this bond that had survived decades and wars, and you couldn't explain why he had taken such a peculiar liking to you over anyone else.

For the soldier’s sake, you took your new role without complaint.

Countless hours in the medical wing of Avenger's tower proved exhausting for the both of you. Hours of treatment on his end seemed to stretch without end, punctuated by moments of crisis when you found yourself having to wrestle with him every time someone new came into the room.

Your voice grew hoarse from spitting sentence after sentence of reassurance, constant streams of gentle reminders that no one here was going to cause him harm, that he was safe, that these people were here to help. The mantra became as familiar as breathing, though no less important with each repetition.

The soldier experienced dramatic swings between states of intense panic and unsettling calmness, making each medical examination completely unpredictable. Sometimes he would remain completely still, frozen like a statue during the procedures, while other times he would thrash and struggle with every ounce of strength to escape from the men in white. His behavior was noticeably different with female medical staff, even when they wore the white coats - he showed a marked willingness to cooperate with them much more. The behavioral change made your stomach churn with the obvious implications.

As days turned to weeks, he gradually began to show signs of adjustment within your quarters. The decision to let him stay had come naturally, as every attempt to establish separate living arrangements had proven futile…he invariably found his way back to your space.

Every time.

It became a predictable pattern: regardless of the hour, whether in the dark of night or dawn of early morning, he would somehow make his way back into your room and by your side. He was satisfied sleeping on the floor, he settled himself at the foot of it or beside it, he liked the small area tucked between the wall and your mattress, a small hidden space for him to form some sense of security.

It had been several months since the day when you first took him in, watching as he struggled daily with the fragments of his shattered identity. The psychological wounds were still raw and festering, making it impossible for him to process or accept who he truly was. Every morning brought new challenges, every evening ended in confusion and frustration.

Together with Steve, you dedicated countless hours trying to help him piece together the puzzle of his past life. Steve brought out old photographs, shared stories, and created detailed timelines in journals, but despite all your patient guidance and gentle encouragement, the poor man remained trapped in a void of forgotten memories. He couldn't recall anything from his previous life, not even the smallest detail.

The mounting frustration grew in every line of his face, in the way his hands would clench and unclench as he'd violently shove away the journals and carefully curated photos. His eyes would dart around the room like a cornered animal, accusing Steve of fabricating elaborate lies as his mind wrestled between what felt true and what his broken psyche insisted was false.

"Shut up!" Bucky suddenly exploded, sending the leather-bound photo album flying across the room with enough force to leave a mark on the wall. He launched himself up from his position between you and Steve, his entire body radiating tension and hostility. As he whirled to face Steve, his eyes were wild with confusion and fear, nostrils flaring with each rapid breath.

Steve was clearly struggling to maintain his composure through all of this too. Though he tried his best to remain patient and understanding, watching his oldest and dearest friend transform into someone who didn't even recognize him was taking an enormous emotional toll. Rising slowly to meet Bucky's challenge, Steve's face was a mixture of hurt and frustration. "I'm not lying," he insisted, his voice thick with emotion, "Your name is James Buchanan Barnes - I'm your friend!"

"No!" The soldier shouted back, his chest heaving rapidly with each labored breath as he stood there, his long dark hair falling in tangled strands over his face while he shook his head violently in denial.

"You know me!" Steve retorted passionately, his voice cracking with emotion as he faced the resistance before him, desperately trying to reach through to his old friend.

"No, I don't!" The words came out as a raw, desperate cry, filled with confusion and pain.

You wanted to intervene in their intense confrontation, but for the moment you stayed silent and watched the two of them from your position, your heart racing as you observed their exchange, wondering if maybe Steve's unwavering determination could finally break through the soldier's programmed shell and reach the Bucky that lay buried underneath all those years of conditioning.

The soldier threw a punch, his metal arm whirring with the momentum as Steve quickly dodged out of the way. The poor soldier had thrown such a powerful and uncontrolled swing that it sent him stumbling forward, his boots scraping against the floor as he struggled to maintain his balance. You immediately rose to your feet as you realized this confrontation was rapidly escalating. You had been able to keep the soldier at bay, his unstable emotions were pretty manageable up until now and you didn’t want them to get out of hand.

"Okay, enough! Steve, stop-" You warned with urgency in your voice, desperately wanting the blond man to create some distance so the agitated soldier could have space to regain his composure.

"Soldat...easy, it's okay." You placate in a gentle voice, carefully watching his tense form as he sharply turned around to face the two of you again, his chest heaving with each breath.

"He's lying!" The words tore from his throat, anger, fear, confusion filled his tone.

"It's okay...it's all okay," You soothed, focusing all your energy on defusing the situation. You held your hands out toward him in a peaceful gesture, maintaining steady eye contact despite the intensity of his gaze. "You're fine...just take a breath." Your measured, calming tone seemed to pierce through his agitation like a shaft of light through storm clouds.

Gradually, the harsh, rapid breathing that had been wracking his frame began to slow, your non-threatening demeanor and passive body language helping to anchor him back to a more stable state.

"I think that's enough for today..." You muttered quietly, glancing back at Steve with a weary expression. He was still visibly frustrated, his jaw clenched and shoulders tense, but he had enough sense and self-awareness to know it was time to back off for now. Your attention shifted back to the soldier, carefully and gently guiding him down the hallway to your room to give him a much-needed break from the intensity of the memory session.

He was noticeably stiff when he walked, his movements reverted to being mechanical and hesitant. You had no idea what thoughts were racing through his mind, but you hoped you could help ease some of his obvious distress. Days that were more emotionally tense and unpredictable tended to disturb his sleep patterns significantly more than usual, restless nights filled with nightmares and you had to tend him through them. You didn’t mind, but it was exhausting after a few weeks.

Once inside your bedroom, you quietly shut the door behind you and watched as he began to relax ever so slightly, the familiarity of your quarters helping to settle his frayed nerves bit by bit. He slowly trudged over to your bed, his footsteps still carrying that residual tension, before sitting down heavily on the edge and looking up at you with an expression that made your heart ache - his eyes shy and pouty like a kicked puppy, clear with shame and uncertainty.

"M'sorry...I was…bad. I shouted." He muttered softly, his eyebrows deeply furrowed in distress, "I just...can't..." His hand gradually balled into a tight fist and before you could react, he struck himself in the head, hitting over and over as he sat there - delivering short and sharp knocks to his temple that made you wince with each impact.

"Soldat, hey, no. Stop it right now." You quickly grasped his wrist firmly but gently, staring at him with intense concern in your eyes. "We talked about this so many times...don't hurt yourself like this. You don't deserve any punishment...none of what happened was your fault. You just got a bit overwhelmed by everything, and that happens to everyone, even me." You soothed in a gentle voice while maintaining your grip, determined to keep him from continuing to hit his head. “You don’t need to hurt yourself anymore, okay?”

He didn't reply verbally, but the gradual lowering of his mechanical arm provided enough reassurance and comfort for you to finally release your grip on his wrist. With a heavy exhale, you pushed yourself up from your position, muscles protesting slightly from the tension. "I think it's best if we stay in tonight, all things considered." You observed thoughtfully, taking measured steps toward your closet to retrieve some fresh clothes, "I'm going to take a shower, okay?" You turned back to look at him after seconds of silence, only to find his piercing gaze fixed intently on you, his eyes blinking slowly as if processing your words. "Soldat?"

"Да." The response came swiftly and automatically from his lips, prompting you to turn and make your way deliberately toward the attached bathroom. As you walked, you couldn't ignore the sensation of stress gradually creeping through your body, tension coiling through your muscles like a spring. You knew that a hot shower would at least provide some relief, hopefully working to unknot the tight muscles that had formed across your shoulders and down your back.

When you emerged from the steamy bathroom later, towel pressed against your damp hair as you scrunched the moisture from the strands, you stopped in your tracks when you crossed the threshold - the soldier was spread across your bed, his body taut with obvious need as he desperately sought some form of release.

He was alone, his eyes darting around nervously.

Your room smelled nice, a gentle and comforting aroma that made him relax ever so slightly. He felt deeply estranged sitting perched on the edge of your bed, knowing he shouldn't be on the furniture. The memory of that lesson being violently beaten into him surfaced with crystal clarity, he felt a sharp phantom pain at his side, electricity fueling his body.

Should he get down onto the floor where he belonged? You hadn't said anything about it when you left, hadn't seemed to mind his presence on the bed, so maybe just this once it was okay?

“Just this once, you mutt.” He spat at the soldier, perhaps its handler felt some sort of pity for it that day. It was just grateful it didn’t have to curl up on the splintering wooden floor by the bed.

After several long moments of internal debate, he decided to stay on the bed.

You were nice, you wouldn’t hurt him.

He laid back against the bed, a soft sigh escaped his barely parted lips. The sheets smelled incredibly good, carrying your distinct scent; your shampoo, your natural musk that gradually seeped into his sensitive nose as he hesitantly buried his face against your impossibly silky pillow.

God it smelled so good.

Try as he might, he couldn't quite pinpoint the exact notes of the scent, his senses having been shot and dulled for so terribly long. But he knew deep in his bones that it smelled good, smelled sweet and pure and perfect.

As he clutched your pillow closer, hugging it tightly to his chest, he suddenly felt something unfamiliar stirring in his gut, like a sharp fluttering sensation that made his breath catch. His trousers felt uncomfortably tighter and he glanced down at himself with wide eyes, blinking in confusion at the sight. Seeing his body react this way was deeply odd...he hadn't experienced anything like this in such a long time. His handlers always had to give him pills to get this kind of response, otherwise it simply didn't happen.

Growing increasingly curious despite his lingering apprehension, he cautiously felt himself through the fabric and was genuinely surprised to discover that it felt good. It felt...really good, wonderfully good. And it didn't hurt in the slightest. It had always used to hurt so badly before, so why didn't it hurt now? Each time one of his handlers touched him, it hurt a lot. He remembers sharp pain, it made him nauseous a lot of the time. But now…he didn’t feel that pain, only this fluttering feeling.

He couldn't help himself any longer, his control crumbling entirely. Before he fully realized what he was doing, he had frantically ripped his own pants off, stumbling awkwardly as he struggled to kick his heavy combat boots off in order to tear the restricting black pants completely off himself as he penguined around your room. Bouncing precariously on one leg and growling in mounting frustration, he nearly toppled over onto his ass in his desperation.

He stared at his crotch, his thick cock twitching and leaking fluid as it throbbed at attention. The neglected part of him begged for his touch, the way it sent neurons rapidly to his brain to do something almost hurt. The soldier was desperate yet hesitant, he hadn't been allowed to touch himself in HYDRA, it was forbidden for him to ever do so. Only his handlers had that luxury, and it never felt good.

The poor thing felt hot and he bit back a strangled whine as he finally allowed himself the intimate touch he'd been denying for so long. His trembling fingers hesitantly explored bare skin, trailing down his abdomen and to his neglected cock.

He carefully grasped himself, unsteady and out of practice, his hand moved up and down the length with tentative strokes as he tried to replicate what he knew from distant memories. He squeezed and turned his hand with experimental motions, though the sensations remained frustratingly muted, falling short of what he desperately sought. His behavior replicated that of past hands, mechanical and clinical touches that had never prioritized his pleasure or comfort.

His frustration mounted steadily as his pent up desire overwhelmed his senses, leaving him breathless and yearning for more. The soldier moved back to your bed with shaky steps, his cock felt heavy, his balls full and needy for some kind of release. He buried his face deep in your pillow once more, inhaling deeply to chase that fluttery feeling that he felt earlier when inhaling your scent.

As you stood there, freshly showered with droplets of water still clinging to your skin, the plush towel wrapped securely around your body - you were surprised at the sight before you. The soldier on your bed moved with such raw, unrestrained desperation, his movements so primal and needy that you couldn't help but wonder if this was his first taste of pleasure, as if he hadn't ever experienced the sweet release of an orgasm before, or hell, even remember what it was like.

The man clung onto your pillow, face buried in it as his hips jut into your bed, the comforter balling up under him. His grunts were muffled against the pillow, his thrusts against your sheets were sloppy and jerky. You could tell he was just trying to reach climax, but none of his actions would get him there. He'd only cause himself enough friction to stay hard.

He lifted his face up gradually, his flushed cheeks burning bright and his dark eyebrows drawn tightly together in concentrated pleasure. His lips were glossy and parted, glistening with saliva as he practically drooled with desperate need, his entire body trembling on the edge of climax. His frantic thrusting began to slow to an erratic rhythm as waves of tension visibly radiated through his muscular form. The soldier's heavy-lidded eyes fluttered open hazily, only to suddenly lock onto your watching form.

In that moment, his entire body froze completely rigid, like a marble statue caught in a compromising position, as the full realization dawned across his features that you had discovered him rutting so shamelessly against your bed.

Assuming the worst, he quickly got up and leaned back, exposing himself without realizing it. His cock angry with need, leaking thick fluid as it tried to get its host to relieve the growing pain of orgasm denial. Your eyes were naturally drawn to it, the thick member twitching and staining your favorite pillow.

His face was flushed a deep crimson with overwhelming embarrassment, his eyes cast downward to avoid meeting your gaze as he desperately tried scooting further back on the bed. The poor man was clearly consumed by shame, not just from staining your belongings but from experiencing such intense, primal need for the first time in what felt like countless decades.

You had always been careful with him before, understanding and respecting his past experiences and trauma. But right now, watching his reactions and body language, it seemed like he was silently pleading for your intervention.

And honestly...the sight of him this way made your pussy feel wetter by the second.

"Awe, baby...are you struggling?" You asked in the softest, most nurturing tone you could, slowly making your way to the bed, careful not to startle him. "Don't worry, I know it feels weird, huh...I'll help make it better."

Your hand gently reached out and ran up from his knee to his thigh, the bare skin feeling warm and inviting against your palm. Your fingertips traced delicate patterns as they moved upward, savoring each moment of contact he allowed you to have. Your eyes glanced down at the scars marring his beautiful body - silvery lines etched across his skin like a canvas of survival. He didn't like looking at them, always trying to hide them away from view, but you didn't mind. They didn't make him any less pretty to you .

You reached his pelvis, your touch feather-light as you looked up through your lashes to meet his eyes. They were glossy with need, dark with desire as he stared down at you - his broad chest heaving with painful anticipation, each breath making the muscles in his abdomen tense and relax. "Please..." he spoke meekly, voice barely a whisper, his bottom lip trembling as he gripped the sheets beneath him, desperately resisting the overwhelming urge to rut upward towards your teasing touch.

"I'll take care of you," your voice cooed, gently reassuring him as your heart fluttered rapidly against your ribcage as your gaze drifted downward to rest upon his erect cock. Your fingertips traced light patterns up the length of his thighs, the touch both teasing and tender, avoiding those silvery scars. You pressed against his thighs, carefully guiding his legs to part.

Fuck, he was beautiful.

Pretty pink head just weeping for your touch, twitching as it laid against his belly, sticky fluid webbing into his neat, curly happy trail. Pretty pearls flowing out of him as the blushed tip became a darker, angrier red with the company of your touch.

His balls hung heavy, so so full, so you gently kneaded his sac. This earned a loud whine in response to your warm hand palming against him, massaging the sore testicles. "Please, please...please, I need..." His pretty voice was so delicious as he begged for something, he just didn't know what.

"What do you want baby...tell me, I'll give it to you," you whispered softly against his skin, your warm breath causing goosebumps to ripple across his flesh. The man beneath you was struggling to maintain his composure, his chest rising and falling with rapid, shallow breaths. Tears welled in his glacial eyes as he trembled against the soft, cotton sheets, his fingers desperately clutching at the bedding beneath him.

His voice caught in his throat - a deep, ripping cry of need as you slowly placed tender kisses along his knee. You took your time, savoring each press of your lips as you traced a path along the sensitive inside of his thigh, feeling the muscles quiver beneath your touch. Just before reaching the spot he craved your attention most, you paused, letting the anticipation build a bit.

"I won't tease too much, I know you are needy." You finally grasped him, letting your hand move along. Bucky squirmed, moaning and desperately rutting up into your touch for more. You kept a slow pace, steadily stroking his hard flesh so as to not overwhelm him. Your thumb gently caressed his tip, circular motions spreading those pearly beads all around and coating the tip in a thick lubricant.

You let your thumb gently press and swipe up through his slit, applying just the right amount of pressure to make him quiver. The sensation overwhelmed him, causing his body to tremble uncontrollably as waves of pleasure coursed through him. His back arched dramatically off the bed as he cried out in pure ecstasy, every nerve ending singing with delight as it felt so good. You felt so incredibly good, your touch electric against his sensitive, neglected cock.

This was entirely new territory for him - he had never experienced anything that came close to this level of intensity before. Physical contact without pain was a rare occurrence, and when he did get touched in the past, it was never on his terms. But this - this was something entirely different, something that made his whole body feel alive with sensation. The pleasure built and built until it felt like brilliant fireworks were exploding in his belly, sending sparks of pure bliss radiating through his entire body until his fingertips and toes tingled with static numbness.

You let out a soft breath, a smile quirked at your lips as you viewed the mess of white ropes that hung against his belly and draped on your fingers from your stroking. He came already, you barely touched him and he fucking came. Disheveled, he took deep breaths and looked up at you, his eyes peeking open as a small whimper emitted from his throat.

However, he was still hard.

You wondered if super soldiers could go more than once without a refractory period.

"What do you want, Bucky?" you asked the trembling soldier, your voice barely above a whisper. His breath hitched as you leaned closer, eyes searching his face intently. "What do you want...tell me. You get to choose. You decide what happens now," you murmured, watching his reactions carefully as your hands slowly traced gentle patterns across his thighs, fingers trailing deliberately up and over his pelvis, thumbs following the natural V-line. You applied just enough pressure to his shaking muscles to make him gasp, feeling the way he tensed and relaxed under your touch.

The poor man could barely form a coherent thought, his mind clouded with desire. His hands frantically grasped at your arms, fingers flexing against your skin as he tugged and yanked lightly, desperately trying to pull you on top of him. His voice came out rough and pleading, filled with raw need as he begged, "More, more...more..." His lip trembled and his eyes watered, you had never seen him like this, so taken over by the cloud of need.

"You want me to ride?" you asked gently, your fingers unwound the towel still wrapped around your body, letting it fall softly and you tossed it off beside the bed. Your skin glowed in the dim light as you leaned forward, your voice dropped to a calm whisper. "I'll ride you, all you have to do is sit back and enjoy..."

The words ghosted across his skin as you traced a delicate path with your lips, starting at his sternum and working your way up, each kiss lingering longer than the last. Your mouth found the sensitive spot where his neck met his shoulder, and you could feel the thundering of his pulse beneath your lips.

His breathing had grown ragged and uneven, chest rising and falling rapidly beneath your touch. His arms encircled you, fingers pressing into your skin as if he were anchoring himself to reality, terrified that if he loosened his grip even slightly, you might fade away and he’d wake up in a cold cell again.

Before you knew it, his cock was poking your slick entrance and you sunk down on his length without wasting a beat, impaling yourself on his thickness. He let out a shuddering cry, his glossy eyes widening with unbridled desire as his trembling hands instinctively shot out to grasp your plush, inviting hips, fingers pressing deeply into the soft flesh.

Oh, this felt...fuck, he struggled to find words. The warmth enveloping him, the wetness made his head spin, the softness of your cunt threatened to undo him completely.

You squeezed him so good, your inner muscles contracting rhythmically around him like your body was purposefully attempting to milk him of everything he had stored away, drawing out every last drop. You carefully began to move on him, lifting your hips up slowly before letting gravity guide you back down, savoring each sensation as you felt him stretch and move your insides. The fullness was overwhelming - he was absolutely massive in you, spreading you wider than you'd ever been, yet somehow he fit perfectly, like your bodies were made for each other, two lost pieces of a puzzle finally united.

Your body moved in perfect harmony with his, each roll of your hips drawing out beautiful moans in response. The way you naturally undulated against him, finding an intoxicating rhythm that had him gasping and trembling beneath you. His hips bucked up desperately to meet your movements, seeking more of that friction that felt so damn good. The soldier's hands gripped you tightly, his fingers still digging into your skin as he struggled to maintain what little composure he had left.

"C..can't...gonna..." His voice strained and broke, he buried his face into your chest as he thrusted up hard - warm, gooey cum shooting out and coating your cervix and inner walls, pooling out of your cunt and coating him as he thrusted slowly until he stopped and remained tucked inside.

He cried out against you, his body trembling and clinging desperately as waves of intense pleasure coursed through him, his second release of the night overwhelming his senses completely. His fingers dug into your skin as he shuddered, overcome by the intensity of sensations he had been denied for so very long.

"I've got you," you whispered soothingly, your arms wrapping protectively around his broad shoulders. One hand found its way into his hair, fingers threading through the soft strands as you gently scratched his scalp in a comforting rhythm. His face remained buried against your breasts, and you could feel the warm wetness of tears against your skin.

A seed of worry took root in your gut at his emotional response, but you quickly reminded yourself that these tears were caused by relief and pleasure, not pain or distress. His hurt body and tortured mind were simply overwhelmed by the rush of positive sensations - after decades of existing without any form of physical pleasure or intimate touch, it was natural for him to be overcome by these emotions when finally getting to experience pleasure again.

Bucky sobbed.

His body trembled violently as if the bitter chill of winter had taken his body all over again, leaving him shaking uncontrollably in the aftermath. He clung to you, unwilling to release his grip on you. The safest he had ever felt was here, wrapped in your arms, where nothing else seemed to matter.

His broken mind, a constant battlefield of screaming thoughts filled with pain and unrelenting anger, was silenced - if not just a little - when he was in your arms. The constant torment of pain and guilt became manageable right here by your side, tucked away against your chest and arms.

No longer lost. No longer wandering aimlessly.

Thanks for reading. -em 🌿

Dividers by @/strangergraphics | Images found on Pinterest.

[heyimkana]

Limerence (1/2)

AO3 Link

Pairing: Sung Jinwoo X Female Reader

Genre: YANDERE, smut, fluff

Summary: Being madly in love with your fiancée made you stay ignorant of the alarming signs Jinwoo had shown throughout the four years of your relationship with him. It was only until one incident happened that you realized that beneath his sweet smile and gentle demeanor lay a monster begging to be set free.

Content Warnings: graphic description of murder, gore, sexual scenes, implied sexual assault attempt (not by Jinwoo), severe obsession, power imbalance, emotional manipulation, dacryphilia

Word Count: 9K

@princeizuku wanted me to write Yandere!Jinwoo so this one's for you, Tina, I love you, baby 😘❤️

This is a test, one that you don’t realize until it’s all too late.

It will only dawn on you later, once you have your feet shackled, your hands bound, and your mouth gagged, that it is never a coincidence that your fiancée, Sung Jinwoo, who’s always been so strict about not letting you out of his apartment without permission, left the front door unlocked this morning. It is a test of your loyalty, of your obedience. A test that will reward you with every nice thing the world could offer—a shelf full of your favorite books, dozens of pretty clothes, exquisite pieces of jewelry, and pleasure after pleasure in bed—if you agree to keep your oath to stay still in your room like the good girl he expects you to be. 

But you don’t plan on doing that, do you? You want to give in to temptation. You want to chase after your freedom, to live in a world where he doesn’t have his black wings wrapped around you. As you’re not aware that it’s a trial he gives you, another heartless game he plays, you do just that, leading you to fail the test.

And every failure bears its own consequences.

***

You think it’s a miracle when you feel the doorknob turn beneath your fingers, not knowing that this is the beginning of what will be the worst mistake of your life. After passing through so many attempts, so many days and nights where you tried to unlock it without him knowing, you were so close to giving up. You didn’t even bother to try at first. After all, Jinwoo would always ensure you were locked and secured inside his penthouse, giving you nothing to do except wait for his return. 

No matter how chaotic his schedule was, he would always come home in time, just a couple of hours after the sun had set below the horizon. And you would greet him with a kiss on the lips and your legs spread wide open the way you were supposed to, the way you had always done without fail in the last six months he’d been holding you captive.

Yet, for some reason today, perhaps out of habit, you find your feet dragging you back to the front door, mulling to yourself as to why your fiancée hasn't come home yet when it’s already an hour before midnight. There has been no text, no call. It was as if he had forgotten about you.

You almost laugh at the thought. Jinwoo will never forget about you. No matter how much you wish for him to. And that’s why you give it another try, your fingers twisting around the door handle, and suddenly… It clicks. 

It clicks open. 

It’s hard to believe that the world, as vast as it was, finally appears before you, completely yours to touch, to be lived in. It leaves you spellbound to your feet, unable to do anything but stare. 

Then, your mind starts to gyrate.

Jinwoo must have forgotten to lock the door this morning. He was in a hurry, after all. What was it—a dungeon break, he said? That’s your first thought.

No, he’s not stupid enough to make such mistakes. He’s always meticulous when it comes to these things. But then why? Why is the door unlocked? That’s your second.

And as you grip the handle with a quivering hand and a thrashing heart, pushing the door open, your third thought sinks in, louder than the voice of the angel on your shoulder telling you to stay put.

Run. 

It’s the only chance for you to escape, to retrieve the rights Jinwoo has taken away from you. It could be a trap, another warning echoes through your head, but with adrenaline pumping through your veins, your lungs breathing in the fresh air, your tongue so close to tasting the freedom you’ve yearned for, you decide to take the risk. 

Anywhere is better than here. ***

Twenty-eight-year-old Sung Jinwoo, the guild master of the renowned Ahjin Guild, sits calmly in the quietude of his private office room with his black suit unbuttoned and his collar unfastened. His paperwork is left untouched, stacked into a pile, his mind revolving into something else entirely. Loosening his tie with one hand, he pushes back his raven locks with another, his smile gracing his lips. He leans back comfortably on his swivel chair, his legs spread, his elbow propped on its armrest. He’s watching his favorite show. 

You.

“There she goes…” A small smirk tugs at his lips as he observes your every move, his cobalt blue eyes turning violet as he channels through his power. They gleam eerily in the darkness, radiant compared to the pale, silvery moonlight that bathes his equally pasty skin. If there’s one skill he’s eternally grateful for, it’s this—the ability to share senses with his shadow soldiers. 

To share senses with the one he’s placed on you.

Through the eyes of his most powerful knight, Igris, he can feel a slight surge of amusement and excitement rising within him as he watches you run. You’re trying your best to flee the home you share together—the most expensive, gorgeous, sacred heaven he bought solely to be with you, to keep you trapped. Your gullible, foolish mind thinks you can escape him somehow, not knowing that he has eyes and ears everywhere, forgetting that the last time his prey tried to escape him, they were shredded to pieces simply by a flick of his hand.

But Jinwoo won’t hurt you. No, of course not. He loves you, adores you with every fiber of his being. He loves you, still, even now, even after you decided that the cruel world outside his embrace was better than the paradise he’d offered you. And he will continue to love you until the stars crumble to ashes. 

That’s why he plans to keep you for eternity. Because he loves you.

It’s a shame, really, that you don’t see eye to eye. Instead of being grateful for the love he has given you, you choose to be terrified by the intensity of his affection, slipping away through his hand the second you find the chance simply because you think you’re not strong enough to handle being smothered by his love. But you are. You’ve always been more than enough.

No one could fit him better than you. No one could please him better than you do. You think you’re at your limit, but you aren’t. He knows you could take more of him, the same way you always did when he pushed into you at night, stretching your walls with his cock, molding you until you became the perfect sheath for him and him only. You always said it was too much, too big, too painful, but you always took him so well, didn't you? Clenching around him so tightly as if you never wanted to let him go. 

Jinwoo has memorized every detail of you like the back of his hand. He knows what’s perfect for you: him. And you… You are the thread that keeps him sane. The center of his universe. Without you, he’ll let everything burn to the ground. Without you, he'll destroy the heavens himself. 

And yet…

“I can’t believe you actually left me…” He brings his hand to his lips, veiling the sadistic grin that blossoms upon them. “After everything we’ve been through… After everything I’ve done for you…” He chuckles once, his gaze burning with the desire to dominate you. “You’re breaking my heart, Angel.”

He leans back in his chair, his strands rubbing against the headrest. Through his shared senses, he watches you break free from the elevator and sprint through the lobby without looking back. Jinwoo nibbles at the corner of his lip, his vile grin threatening to grow.

Run, Sweetheart. Run as fast as you can. Because once I get my hands on you…

His eyes flare, like purple torches shimmering in a black cave. 

I’ll make sure you’ll never leave me again. ***

Run, the word continues to chime throughout the labyrinth of your mind as you burst into the cold night air, your body saturated by the city lights. Although freedom is now within your hands, no fragment of your soul is ready to celebrate. You’re still terrified, anxious, feeling like you were still imprisoned, dancing in his palm with blazing shoes. 

I need to keep running. I need to be somewhere where he can’t find me.

But… where?

Jinwoo observes you intently, his body set aflame both by the fury of being betrayed and the thrill born from the things he plans to do to you once he gets his fingers wrapped around your throat again. He knows he'll have you back. He can catch you now if he wants to, but no, not yet. He craves to see more, to let you be happy with this freedom you thought you’d obtained on your own.

Because the happier you become, the easier he’ll break you down. Nothing hurts more than being entrapped in the crevice of hell after you descended from heaven.

And he’ll do it. Oh, he’ll break you apart until you can do nothing without him. He’ll make you grow so dependent on him until you’re left with no hope without his presence next to you, no desire to touch the outside world unless he guides you to. He won’t stop until you become his, entirely his—body, mind, and soul.

His smirk widens as he watches you run down concrete steps with nothing but your phone held tightly in your hand. You seem pathetic, adorably so. He can hear how your breathing starts to grow heavy, the untrained muscles in your legs begging you to slow down, to take a rest. Although you are oblivious to the fact that he’s closely monitoring your every move, you can feel dread chasing after you. You slip on the last tread, hissing at the pain bursting from your ankle. You didn’t break it, thank God, but it’s definitely sprained. Still, you refuse to give up.

You’re not yet certain where you should be running to; you just know that you have to before he returns to the neighborhood. You need to be as far away from his building as possible—from him—even if you had to chop one of your legs for it.

“Trying so hard to escape me… How cute,” Jinwoo utters aloud, his voice laced with mocking amusement at your little attempt. He enjoys watching you struggle, deriving some sadistic pleasure from witnessing the painful look on your face as your throat catches fire with each breath you take. He takes pleasure from it because he knows the more you hurt yourself, the more desperate you’ll be when you beg him to soothe you afterward. 

That pain on your ankle… He wants to kiss it away. His lips will move gently against your skin before he maps his way up to your knee, your thigh, your soaking cunt, and he’ll torture you just like that, licking you nice and slow, leaving darker bruises than the one that blooms on your injury. He’ll watch you whimper, smiling in satisfaction when you start pleading with your eyes, needing him to give you something much thicker, much bigger than his tongue. And he won’t give it to you. No, he won’t do it until you cry. Until you crumble to your knees, seeking for his mercy with tear-stained cheeks. Until you promise him that you’ll never leave him again. 

“Pretty. You’re gonna look so pretty for me, Angel,” he breathes out heavily, feeling himself harden beneath his trousers at the thought. "So fucking cute, begging for me to ruin you."

But he needs to be patient. The game has just started. ***

Beads of sweat drip off your chin as your skin is bitten by the cold of the frosty night. You’re so hasty in making your escape that you run only in the clothes Jinwoo had dressed you with—a beautiful white dress that brought your feminity to the surface.

White, he’s decided from the moment he laid eyes on you, is the perfect color for you. Purity, innocence, divinity—these are the words it represents, the terms he constantly uses to define you in his mind. He wears darkness like a cloak, but you are the blinding light that sheds it away from him. You are his new beginnings, the goddess he reveres. You’re not supposed to be tainted, but he’s a man eager to sin, and you’ll allow him, won’t you? You love to be stained by his hands, by his teeth. You look gorgeous in white, but you appear heavenly with purple roses blooming on your skin, ones that he bestowed with his mouth and fingertips. 

Shivers run across your skin as your lungs burn inside. You look up at the night sky above you, velvet black with no diamonds in sight. Winter will soon blanket the earth with its pure white snow. You can already taste the ice in the air with each breath you take.

How much time has passed since I left his building? You’re not sure. But with no money in hand and no wallet set up on your phone, you can’t travel far. If only Jinwoo hadn’t confiscated your belongings, you would’ve had something to purchase a train ticket to return to your home. All you have now is the silver ring he’s placed around your finger.

I can trade it, but…

You shudder at the thought. Jinwoo has promised he’ll never hurt you, and he’s kept his word in the last six months he’s been confining you inside the walls of his penthouse. You trust him, believe him to the point that you’re still somewhat assured that he will take you back without harming you, even if he catches you right now. But if you dare to toss away the token of his love, of the vows you’d exchanged…

He’ll never forgive me.

The sight of your ring glinting beneath the yellowish glow of the street lamps causes you to recall the day when he sank down to one knee, proclaiming his eternal love for you. You said yes, didn’t you? Without a sliver of doubt, you agreed to his proposal, your smile blinding, elation permeating your chest.

Why? You chastise yourself now as you drown in regret. Why was I so stupid? That time, you were so hopelessly in love with him, your mind submerged in the state of sheer happiness that you thought would last forever.

Jinwoo was perfect. Before he unveiled the monster hidden inside him, he was everything you ever wanted. Tall and handsome, modest despite possessing God-like powers, and above all that, he was a kind, respectful man. He was always so gentle with you—so, so gentle—embracing you like a porcelain doll, refusing to touch you unless you permitted him to. Every kiss was featherlight until you deepened it. Every caress was soothing on your skin until you begged him to bruise you. Back then, you wanted to be his, didn't you? You wanted to be the only one who could satisfy him in every way, to be the only woman who could wear his mark on your skin like a badge of honor. You thought it would be the sweetest dream to be claimed by someone as divine as Sung Jinwoo.

Until one incident happened, and it all turned into a nightmare, one that was everlasting, like the shadow that trembled beneath his feet. ***

It began six months ago, the event that changed everything. 

You were stuck in your office that night, trying to meet your deadline as quickly as possible. The hours had grown late. Amidst the frustration you held against yourself for not being fast enough to finish your reports, you gave your lover a quick call, apologizing for not being able to come home in time to celebrate your fourth anniversary together. 

Jinwoo, the perfect lover that he was, had already spent hours preparing for the special night. A set of your favorite dishes had been served, styled to perfection by his own hands. Romantic candlelights decorated the dining table, the perfect company to the crystal vase filled with fresh lilies to match your everlasting beauty. He had prepared two tall glasses and a bottle of your preferred red wine dipped in ice for a nice, romantic chat in front of the fireplace. Dozens of presents, filled with the items on your wishlist, were hidden in places for you to seek. And if you hadn’t texted him to let you know that you had to spend another few hours trapped in your cubicle, your fiancée would’ve been there with a bouquet of roses to escort you home the second you were off work. Everything was planned to perfection, as that was what you deserved. A perfect night for someone as perfect as you.

And there you were, ruining everything.

“Jinwoo?”

“Sweetheart,” he breathed out, almost longingly. As if just the sound of his name spoken in your voice rendered him weak. “Hey. I was just thinking about you.”

He’d never left your mind, and that sensual, husky voice of his was one of the reasons why. “Honey, I’m so sorry,” you sighed into the phone, massaging the bridge of your nose as both fatigue and a heavy sense of guilt filled you to the brim. “I swear, I thought I could finish my report in an hour or two, but I made a mistake, and now I have to redo everything. I’m probably gonna be stuck here for another hour or two. Is that all right?”

There were two seconds of silence that doubled the weight of your regret, but then— “Are you safe? Do you need me to be there with you?” Those were the questions he always asked, the only things that mattered. Everything else could wait, even his own feelings. 

Jinwoo could be in the middle of a perilous dungeon break, protecting the citizens from the starving beasts, and he would abandon everything at once if you so much as called his name, needing his presence. Your safety had always been his first and foremost priority.

However, as wonderful as it was, you often found it overwhelming, especially when you felt his shadow soldiers following your every step. That was why you made him promise not to place one on you, to give you a room to breathe. It was a proposition that he initially opposed, knowing it was the safest way to ensure your security, but he had also grown aware of how much your privacy mattered to you. He respected that. He trusted you. And, so, with a reluctant heart, he made his vow. 

You believed him, the way you always did. 

But what you didn't know was that in order to respect your privacy, he sacrificed everyone else’s. 

Jinwoo had sent hundreds of soldiers to spy on anyone who could come in contact with you. Every family member, friend, co-worker, security guard, even a regular passerby, if they so much breathed in the air that you breathed, then a beast resided beneath their feet. 

You promised him you'd be safe without him. He made sure you stayed true to your words. 

“Yes, I’m safe,” you answered him through the phone. “Don’t worry. I’m just gonna be sitting here in my seat, doing these stupid reports.” And missing you badly.

“You should quit your job. I’ll provide everything for you.”

It wasn’t a jest. You knew he meant every word, but you tittered anyway. “Maybe I will, once you marry me.”

“Princess, I would marry you this second, you know that. Just say the words, and I’m yours.”

You smiled, your heart fluttering in delight. Honestly, taking a quick trip to the nearest church and pronouncing your vows in front of the priest and a janitor as your witness wouldn’t be too terrible if it meant you could spend the rest of your eternity with him. “I want to marry you, too, Jin. I wanna marry you right now, but…”

There was a quaver in his breath, his voice tight. “But..?”

“I think I’d prefer it better if my family could see me walking down the aisle in my wedding dress.” And seeing you standing so handsomely in your suit, waiting for me near the altar, watching me with devotion in your eyes, the way you always look at me… God, I would trade the world for it.

Jinwoo sighed, yearning for the image you envisioned. “You in a wedding dress, huh? That is indeed a sight worth waiting for.”

“That’s right,” you giggled. “So, should we postpone it for a bit? Until I can find a dress that fits?”

“You better not take too long. You know how impatient I could be, especially when it comes to you.” You could visualize his sultry smirk vividly in your mind. “Now that I’m picturing you in a wedding dress, all I can think about is ripping that same dress off you.”

“Jinwoo…” It was unfair how easily he could make you pine for him, your body needing his touch so desperately just from hearing his raspy voice. “Don’t distract me like this, please. I’ve got work to do.”

“I’m sorry, love.” His voice, despite still sounding as soft as silk, turned deep, drenched with desire. “I just wish you were here with me right now. I know we spend every night and every morning together, but today, I just… I miss you so badly. Maybe it’s because we’re celebrating our anniversary tonight, but I haven’t stopped thinking about you all day.” 

You nibbled at your lip, sharing the same need. “I’ve been thinking about you all day, too.”

His breathing turned heavy before a confession followed. “It’s weird, I’ve never…” He tarried, a slight bashfulness growing evident in his voice. “I’ve never felt this way about someone before. You drive me crazy. It’s like I can’t live without you. I need you, Angel. Desperately so.”

Need, never want. He never craved you solely for your body. He needed you—your kindness, your smile, your kiss, your scent, your love, your everything.

“Come home, baby. Come home to me.”

You felt awful, devastated even, as you heard the wretchedness in his voice. It was your anniversary, for fuck’s sake, and you chose to stay miles apart from him instead of being in his embrace. And Jinwoo didn’t even complain about it, not questioning your actions, your decisions, just simply stating how much he longed for you. Would you have been so nice and understanding if you were in his shoes? If you had spent hours preparing for the perfect night just to see him cancel your plan at the last minute? It would’ve been difficult, for sure. 

And that’s why I want to marry him so badly, you thought to yourself as gratitude glowed inside you. You couldn’t wait for the day to come, to have your heart etched with his name. 

“I’ll finish this in an hour,” you uttered with a new set of determination. “I promise you.” 

“You don’t have to promise me anything. I understand. I adore this side of you, too, how responsible and hardworking you are.” You could sense the proud smile in his voice, could envisage just how soft and beautiful it was. “Just make sure you’ll always be safe. And text me when you’re about to finish. I’ll pick you up.”

You felt so loved, so taken care of. “I will. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“Mm. I’ll be waiting for you at home.”

Home. You loved that word more than anything. It was an abrupt decision when you'd agreed to move in with him a year ago, a joyful burst of “Jinwoo, of course, I’d love to live with you,” to answer the invitation he'd proffessed with a soft blush permeating his cheeks. It was sudden, yes, but when you spoke your answer, you knew for certain that it was a choice you’d never regret. Because why would you, when you got to spend every second of every hour of your life with the man you loved?

“I love you, Jinwoo.”

“I love you, too, Angel.”

You ended the call, and it almost felt like a part of you died with it. 

The clock was ticking fast. 09.42 PM. You looked over to the stack of unfinished reports. Can I really finish all of these in an hour?

“Oh, Noona. You’re still here.”

A younger co-worker—a handsome man with deep obsidian eyes, a radiant, sunshine-esque smile, and spikes in his raven hair—peeked his head inside your cubicle. Lee Minsung, his name was, and you remembered it by heart as he was always there to assist you with your work when everyone else chose to turn a blind eye.

He was a brilliant man. Humble and selfless, with a great sense of humor. Based on the rumors spreading throughout the building, he used to be an actor when he was younger, but his career went downhill after he was involved in a scandal. You didn’t care enough to dig into more details, but if he was indeed an actor, he certainly had the look for it. 

Although he was popular among the women, for some reason, Minsung chose to tag along with you instead, always asking to be put in the same projects as you if the opportunity arose. He said he could breathe easy when he was with you, probably because you only saw him as a friend and nothing more, unlike all the other women who were nice to him to get a sliver of his affection.

“Yeah,” you grumbled. “I’m still here.”

“You haven’t finished yet? It’s almost ten.”

“I would’ve finished a while ago if I hadn’t inputted the wrong numbers. I’m basically redoing everything now, and I still have four more reports to go.” You were close to crying at this point, frustrated. “I’m sorry, Minsung, I don’t have time to chat. I’m in a hurry.”

“So cold,” he joked with a chuckle. Leaning back against the partition with the sleeves of his navy blue shirt rolled up to his elbows, he flaunted a charming smile. “How about I offer you some help, then? I was about to head home, but I could stay here for you if you promise me you'll treat me to some steak.” 

That was a cheap offer. You didn't have to think twice about it. “Yes. Yes, please, help me.” 

There were only the two of you in the room, and you were aware of that, but as soon as you handed him one of your files, Minsung returned to work in his own cubicle, providing some distance between you, and you felt safe. He really was just trying to help.

Half an hour later, he came over with a haughty grin. “Done,” he said, leaving you gaping in awe at his work. Not only was he fast, he did everything so neatly and efficiently, much better than you did.

“Oh my God, you’re my life savior,” you uttered in gratitude before you glanced at the clock. 10.21 PM. Only two more reports to go. With his help, you could finish this sooner than you expected. And then you could go home to your fiancée’s arms, the man you’d been longing to reunite with from the second you kissed him goodbye that very morning. 

“I’ll help you with the rest,” Minsung promised. “But let’s take a break first.”

You didn’t have time to waste. “Sorry, I don’t think I—”

“Please, Noona?” He pleaded with his big, sparkly doe eyes. “Just to get some coffee. It will only take ten minutes max.”

“Minsung—“

“Five. Five minutes. Please?”

You exhaled heavily through your nose; your bottom lip caught between your teeth. You had no choice but to agree as you desperately needed his help. You figured a ten-minute break wouldn’t hurt. If anything, you needed a chance to stretch and unwind your muscles after sitting non-stop for hours. “Fine. I’ll treat you. Let’s go.”

Following his lead, you took the stairs to the next level above you. The lights for that floor had been shut down completely from the main operating room to conserve energy. Using your phone as your flashlight, you stepped into the pantry area. Seeing no one around felt a little eerie, as the space was always crowded during the day, and being shrouded in darkness only multiplied that sensation.

Fortunately for you, the vending machine was still operating as always, providing enough lights for you to make out the shape of Minsung’s affable smile as he talked about the upcoming projects. You felt nervous, still, but you made no complaints. You weren’t going to be long anyway. 

Besides… You looked up at the ceiling, feeling your heart at ease once you spotted the surveillance camera strapped to the corner of the room, observing your every action. We’re not necessarily alone.

Minsung followed your gaze, simpering as he stuffed his hands inside his pockets. “What, Noona, are you scared of being alone with me?”

“No,” you answered promptly, and it wasn’t a complete lie. He was a friend you’d known longer than a month. You trusted him in a way. He didn’t give you any sense of danger, but you couldn’t deny being left alone with a man made you feel slightly anxious. “I was just looking around.”

“Thank goodness. I was worried that I made you feel uncomfortable.”

“No, of course not.”

Tossing you another smile, he walked right past you, his shoulder brushing against yours as he whispered, “It’s not working, by the way. The camera. None of them work on this floor since they plan to install new ones tomorrow. So, it’s just you and me, Noona.”

You quickly grew restless over the news, but you chased your agitation away when you saw him grinning puckishly. He’s just messing with me.

...right?

Minsung, always the gentleman, beat you to the vending machine. He slipped his money inside, purchasing two warm cans of coffee, already memorizing your favorite brand. “Here you go.”

“Thanks.” You took the drink from his hand, your palm warming up instantly from the first touch. “You should’ve let me buy this for you.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to order a super expensive Wagyu steak to make up for it.”

“All right.” The soft peals of your laughter chased away the silence in the room. “Thank you, Minsung. Seriously. I would’ve been stuck here for another hour without your help. I’m running late as it is, so… It really means a lot, thanks.”

“You have somewhere to go?”

You nodded your head, taking a sip of the caffeine. “It’s my fourth anniversary today, so my boyfriend and I—”

“What?”

You stiffened. There was a sudden change in his tone, like a flare of anger mixed with surprise, but when you whirled your head toward him, no such emotion was written on his face. Was I imagining it? 

“I didn't know you had a boyfriend,” Minsung continued. There was something different about his smile. It felt somewhat… alarming. “I don’t think you’ve mentioned him before.”

There was a reason why you never did. As the sixth national-level hunter, Jinwoo was almost as well-known as a world-class celebrity. Everybody had heard his name; most of them admired and worshipped him as their hero, and you were just… someone who happened to meet him by chance at a coffee shop. The difference in status and fame between you could attract unnecessary attention. You could already imagine the amount of journalists that would swarm you with questions if they knew you were engaged. 

Fortunately for you, Jinwoo agreed to play along. Your comfort remained his first concern, after all. He probably figured it would be better for your well-being, too, if there weren’t many people informed about the special bond you shared with him. You wouldn’t be targeted as much, both by the probing reporters or the beings who wished to strike him down.

“Yeah, umm, I don’t really like talking about my personal life,” you responded with an awkward chuckle. “But yeah, I have a boyfriend. A fiancée, actually.” As an elated smile flourished on your lips, your hand absentmindedly pressed against the pendant dangling around your neck, hidden by the collar of your blouse. It was your engagement ring, an extravagant diamond placed upon a silver band. You wished you could let it adorn your fourth finger the way it was supposed to, but doing so would defeat the purpose of keeping your relationship a secret. You didn’t wish for your co-workers to start asking questions about it. You could lie, sure, but… You were never a very good liar to begin with. 

Silence filled the spaces between you. Without knowing why, the tension suddenly turned palpable, almost smothering. “Uhh… Minsung, I think we should head back—”

“What a fucking joke.”

Your heart plummeted from the sudden switch in his demeanor, the change so abrupt and vivid that it brought ice to the atmosphere. Resentment and disdain were engraved firmly in his tone, his voice harsh and deep, making your stomach churn in fear. He laughed once, bitter and cold before he turned to look at you. There was no warmth in his eyes, his expression indecipherable, but you could tell something was wrong, terribly wrong. 

Instinctively, you took a step back, your senses on full alert. “Minsung—”

“I can’t believe I wasted so much time, so much effort to get your attention,” he walked toward you, slow and steady, but with each step he took, you heard the siren in your mind turning vehement. “Just to find out you have a fucking fiancée?”

Still shocked at the sudden twist of the situation, you found your spine pressed against the wall. Minsung caged you with his body, your head trapped between his arms. “You know I like you, right, Noona?” His face hovered a mere few inches above yours as he gazed down menacingly. Perhaps the rumors of him being an actor were true. Never in your life would you have thought that a man as bright as Minsung would possess such a cruel, horrifying personality beneath his prince charming smile. 

“I-I didn’t,” you said, quivers in your voice. You weren’t lying. You were completely unaware of his feelings. Your gullible mind just thought he wanted to befriend you, that he was just naturally kind, the type of person who’d find joy in helping others.

“Don’t lie to me.” His words flew past gritted teeth, heavy with threat. “You think someone would act so nice to you without wanting anything in return? All this time, you knew how I felt about you, and you enjoyed my attention, didn’t you? Is it fun for you? Toying with other people’s feelings?”

“I’ve never—“ You flinched when he grabbed you by the neck, your eyes shut closed as pain jolted through your stream. “M-Minsung—” you choked out, your fingers twisting around his wrist, trying to pry him off of you. It was no use. He was a man nearly twice your size, with the strength of an A-rank Hunter if the words on the street were true. “Let me—go—”

“Or what, hmm?” He snarled behind his wolfish grin. “Pretty girls like you always do whatever you like, don’t they? Taking advantage of people and tossing them away like they’re nothing. Well, tell you what, darling.” He peered down at you with hunger in his eyes, the desire to hurt, to break you.“I can do the same thing, too.”

Terror engulfed you at once as your mind wandered through all the frightening possibilities he could do to you in this empty space, hidden in the dimness of the room. Panic brought tears to your eyes, blurring your vision as your heart desperately sought a savior. 

Jinwoo! You wanted to cry out. Jinwoo, please!

Help me!

“Look at you,” Minsung chuckled, loving the dread in your eyes. “Starting to fear me now, aren’t you, Noona? Too bad, no one’s gonna come to save you. Didn’t I tell you before? It’s just you and me here.” His face hovered close, his breath hot on your cheeks. “So, let’s make that count, shall we?”

Despite the overwhelming fright, you refused to give up, not yet. Clasping your jaws together, you clawed against his wrist with your nails, marring his skin until blood trickled to color his pallid skin crimson.

“Fucking bitch,” he growled, hissing at the wound you inflicted on him. “You’re gonna pay for that.”

He lifted you up the wall, forcing you to stand on your toes. “Stop—” You gasped out as Minsung tightened his fingers around your neck, carving bruises and crushing your windpipes. You kicked around, desperate to regain some distance. “I said, STOP!”

You heard it before your mind could register what your eyes witnessed—the sound of a human’s skull being crushed. Your eyes closed in reflex as splatters of blood and bits of flesh drenched you to your toes. A sudden eerie silence descended over the room, ruined only by the sound of your restrained breathing. Slowly, with your heart caught in your throat, your lids fluttered open—

And you saw Lee Minsung standing before you. Limp. Headless.

Thick blood painted the marble floor, coating the white walls black beneath the looming darkness and smearing scarlet all over the glass. His body was frozen in place, floating a few inches above the ground as if there was an invisible hand seizing him by the neck. By the next time you blinked your eyes, it toppled onto the floor with a heavy thud. More blood oozed out of the corpse, pooling around your feet and soaking your shoes with its revolting warmth.  

You couldn’t scream, trepidation filling every bit of your nerve as you stared at the scene, striking you to your bones. In that brief moment, time seemed to slow down. Your rapid heartbeat rang clamorously in your ears as your mind gravely tried to process the situation.

Then, you heard footsteps closing in.

With trembles running through your entire body, you turned your head to the side, following where the sound reverberated from. You felt a pair of arms pulling you into an embrace before you could take a glimpse of their owner, his touch so tender and careful, rivaling that of a mother. As your face fell upon a sturdy chest, your senses greeted by a familiar warmth and the pleasant scent of cedarwood and musk, you knew this was the home you wished to run to just a few seconds ago.

“Sorry, I’m late,” Jinwoo’s deep, soothing voice felt like cold water pouring onto scalding skin. “You’re safe now.”

Except he didn’t feel like home anymore, or your savior. He was the Angel of Death, one that just took the life of a mortal without batting an eye.

A part of you felt relieved, grateful—and you should’ve, right? He saved your life, protected you from the man who planned to break you apart. But as your lover drew you closer to his chest, his gentle fingers threading through your hair, pacifying you, your stare returned to Lee Minsung’s mangled body on the floor. Jinwoo had killed thousands of beasts before, and you knew how merciless and brutal he could be in the face of his opponent, but you never thought he would act the same—no, worse—to a human.

Minsung was a despicable person down to his core, and you wished he would get caught and rot in jail for what he did to you, but never, never in your life would you wish for him to end like that. To end with his head… exploding to pieces.

“J-Jin—” Your words stuck in your throat the second you witnessed the fury in his eyes. You’d never seen it before—didn’t even think it was possible for such consuming rage to reside in the pair of the gentlest sapphires you’d ever seen. He wasn’t looking at you, not at your face. His gaze was fixated on the bruise that had besmirched your neck, forming in the shape of another man’s fingers. He breathed out heavily, his wrath threatening to take over and destroy everything around him, but when he caressed his fingertips along the marks, they were as light, as cold and gentle as the first snow of December.

“I shouldn’t have killed him,” Jinwoo spoke through clenched teeth, his voice the quiet rumble of an impending storm. “I should’ve tortured him.”

Your heart freefell to your stomach. This side of him appalled you so terribly it left you tongue-tied. Before you could react, your lover suddenly lifted his head, his sensitive ears catching the sound you couldn’t hear amidst the gale raging in your mind, but his concern over your well-being caused him to notice it a second too late. A patrolling security guard strolled by the door with a flashlight in hand, completely stupefied as he witnessed the gruesome scene unfolding before his eyes. You panicked, your mind in a rush to find a way to escape the situation, but before you could even draw another breath, Jinwoo raised his hand—

And the man’s head was severed from his neck.

Bile quickly rose to your throat as you saw it rolled onto the floor. Splotches of blood bathed Jinwoo’s dark trench coat; some spilled onto his cheek, which he nonchalantly brushed away with his knuckles. His posture remained calm and composed, with no emotions written on his face, as if the act of killing an innocent man was never a dire sin in his book. 

He brought your body flushed against him, holding you protectively against his chest to avert your gaze from the human remains. “Igris,” he summoned, his voice heavy with authority. “Clear the evidence.” 

As black fog materialized in the darkness, you, yourself were consumed by one.

The Angel of Death wrapped his black wings around you and took you away. ***

The next time you fluttered your eyes open, the scene had changed. You had returned home, to the beautiful penthouse you had been living together with him like newlyweds. The blackness of the night shrouded the living space, blanketed every piece of furniture that carried the beautiful memories you shared with him, placing veils upon the photo frames that showcased the romantic smiles and the amorous gazes he directed at you. It was as if the world refused to remind you of the man you loved, forcing you to accept the monster standing before you.

You stood still in the heart of your living room, trapped within his arms. Hot tears emanated in your eyes, filling your sockets and drenching your cheeks. They were not tears of relief, nor were they proof of your gratitude. They were born out of horror, your fear of the man whose name was engraved in the silver ring you wore above your heart. And that man, at that very moment, had you within his clutch. To hold you tenderly or to shatter you to dust, it was all up for you to decide.

He loved you. He loved you now. But if you made one wrong move, one unforgivable mistake that severed the red thread between your fingers…

Will I end up like them? You pondered dreadfully, not realizing how he was capable of doing more. There were worse things than death that you didn’t know yet. But he did. 

And he was ready to give it to you should you choose to abandon him.

Feeling you trembling against him, Jinwoo slowly unwound his arms from you, examining your face with careful fingertips. The glimmering city lights from below seeped faintly through the windows, illuminating one side of his handsome features while leaving the rest for the darkness to embrace. “You’re still shaking… How can I make you feel better?”

His compassion, his soft, caring gaze, the way he carefully brushed his thumb against your tears—everything remained the same, and yet, all you could think about were the ghastly corpses he left on the floor.

Just what kind of a monster is he to be able to do something so cruel without any hesitation? 

Your strength began to trickle out of you, your legs wobbly beneath your weight. “Angel—” You untangled yourself from him, not wanting his help. Sinking to the carpeted floor with your body and clothes still dampened with blood, you felt so weak you could barely speak. 

Jinwoo went down to one knee before you, his eyebrows sewn in deep concern as he reached out a hand to take yours. “Let me carry you to the bed—”

You backed off from him as best as you could, falling to your behind as you jerked away from his touch. You didn’t want his hands on you, not a single finger, not after what he did.

Your action stunned him, but seeing your fear-stricken face, he didn’t take your rejection to heart. He fathomed the trauma you just went through but not understanding that he was the biggest factor that caused it.

“Hey, it’s all right. It’s just me, Sweetheart. Just me.” He assured you with a smile, as saccharine sweet as usual. It felt off-putting as if it didn’t belong there on his face anymore, even if it looked the same. It had been stained by the fact that his hands were now drenched in another man’s blood. 

“It was scary, wasn’t it?” He softly swept your hair out of your face, tucking the damp strands behind your ear. “But it’s over now. Nothing can touch you while I’m here. I promise.”

What he offered as reassurance became terror the moment it reached your ears. If no one could touch you if he were with you, then there would be no one to save you. 

Frantic tears still glazed your eyes, threatening to fall and join the others that had dripped down your chin. “Y-You…” Your breathing quickened, your heart rate escalating rapidly. “Those men… You k-killed them…”

To your horror, his thin lips bowed, forming a smile so angelic, it felt like heaven’s kiss. “I did,” Jinwoo replied, his tone sweet, almost romantic, his gaze soft without a glimmer of remorse. “All for your sake, my love.”

For… For my sake…? 

This is all… my fault?

“I… I never asked you to—” Your words came out in chokes as another surge of panic filled your system. “I never—” There was a pain in your chest that you couldn’t wash away no matter how tightly you clutched your hand over your heart, the world spinning so fast around you, depriving you of oxygen. 

“Breathe,” he urged gently, gathering your face in his hands. “You’re panicking, Sweetheart. You need to calm down first, all right? Focus on me. Focus on my voice.” He kept one hand on your cheek, his thumb rubbing soothing circles along the bone beneath your eye as his other one ran up and down your arm, pacifying you. “There’s no need to be afraid anymore. I'm with you. I'll always be with you.”

The more you listened to him, the more intense your fear grew inside you. It didn’t occur to him that you were afraid of him. He believed he did the right thing—saving you, protecting you. 

“Match your breathing with mine. You can do this.”

He was a bigger monster than you thought he was.

Despite every nerve of your body begging you to flee, you stay put, focusing to compose yourself, to even your breathing the way he guided you. Colors slowly returned to your face, your heart no longer pounding just as hard. 

“There you go, Angel.” He planted a soft kiss on your temple, his own muscles unwinding as relief washed over him. “That’s my good girl. You’ve done so well.”

Brought back down to earth by the same man who showed you a glimpse of hell… You felt sick to your stomach.

“Let’s get you cleaned up, okay?” he offered with a smile, a soft caress of his digits on your cheek. Unable to do anything, you let him take control. With one arm supporting your back and the other hooked behind your knees, your lover carried you to the bathroom. 

You kept yourself mute as you dwelled in the aftermath of the incident, trying to overcome the shock and the horror of his actions. Jinwoo remained patient with you, not forcing you to speak or do anything you weren’t ready for. He simply took off his coat and rolled up the sleeves of his button-down shirt before he sat you down on the edge of the bathtub. 

“Lift your hands for me?” He asked before he removed your blouse, never forgetting his courtesy even after four years of leaving nasty lovebites on each other skin. You did as you were told, your body going on autopilot, complying with your puppeteer’s command. 

Jinwoo stood on one knee before you, wiping the blood off your skin with such tenderness that it would’ve lulled you to sleep had you been able to chase away all the terrorizing thoughts. But how could you when he was still there right before you, acting like the sweet prince that he was while his victim’s blood still stained his shirt and cheek?

“You’re doing great, love,” he praised your obedience, peeling off your stockings one by one. He removed your skirt next, leaving your legs bare, and for a split second, you thought he would pepper butterfly kisses on your thighs, the way he never failed to do, worshipping your body every chance he got. But he didn’t. He showed compassion, giving you space to breathe, not wanting to remind you of the horrifying way Minsung had touched you before. 

Now fully undressed before him, Jinwoo bathed you, starting by washing your hair, taking a moment to ask whether the water was too warm or too cold for your liking. You didn’t answer. A piece of his soul shattered as he watched how crestfallen you were, another part burned with the self-loathing he held toward himself for not being there sooner to save you, and the rest… The rest of him was consumed by the fury he had not yet fully released. Still, with caring hands, he proceeded till the end, scrubbing all the crimson away from your locks and skin before shutting off the water.

Seeing you cleansed and all warmed up, Jinwoo swathed your body with a bathrobe. He lowered himself to his knees once more, meeting your eye level as he dried the excess water from your hair with another towel. You looked so small, so vulnerable that he couldn’t help but gaze at you with his heart breaking in his eyes.

He removed the towel, pushing the stray strands behind your ear. “Can I hug you?” He questioned, his voice barely above a whisper. His hand rested on your knee, his thumb rubbing little circles there, waiting.

The hands you settled on your thighs slowly curled into fists as your emotions overflowed you like a broken dam, your lips quivering in your attempt to fight back the stinging tears. You were scared of him, so terribly scared, but there was a part of you that was still aching for comfort, for the solace that he could only provide. You cast your stare down to your lap, your body trembling as you tried to contain your sobs.

“Oh, Sweetheart…” He brought you back into his embrace, his lips caressing your temple before he settled his chin on your head. “It’s all right, you’re okay now. You’re safe with me.”

There was promise in his words, one that you could easily believe if this incident ever happened. But all you could think right then was—

How can I truly feel safe with you when you’re no longer the man I know?

“Jinwoo…” 

He carefully pulled away, relieved that he could hear your voice again. “Yes?”

“The two men from before…” You shakily began, catching the way his body turned still almost immediately at your words. You hadn’t gathered enough bravery to hold his gaze yet, but it didn’t stop you from forming the question gnawing at your chest. “Why…? Why did you do that to them?”

It took a second for him to respond, stroking the back of your head. “Sweetheart—” 

“Why did you kill them?”

His gaze hardened, seemingly conflicted as he mulled over his answer. You weren’t sure if he were concerned of how his honesty might affect you, or if he just simply refused to reply, not wanting to reveal more sides of the monster he kept inside.  “I was trying to protect you.” 

“Protect me…?” Incredulity washed over your face as you watched him rise back to his feet, his demeanor still poised while you were shaking to your core. “If you wanted to protect me, you could’ve just stopped him. You didn’t have to—”

“I had to.” A layer of his patience snapped, his voice turning frighteningly low. No storm was darker than his gaze when he looked down at you, smothering you more than the brimming anxiety inside you. “He laid his hands on you. On what’s mine.”

Your heart plummeted to your stomach. The way he said it… It was almost as if you were his possession, an object he’d bared his teeth at anyone who dared to touch. 

He killed Minsung because… he couldn’t stand seeing another man play with his toy? 

Your fingers gripped tightly against the tub's edge as gravity seemed to double beneath your feet. “The other man… T-the security guard…”

Jinwoo tightened his jaws, his voice rivaling the frostiness of the blackest winter, a telltale that he had lost a shard of his humanity a long time ago. “I couldn’t afford to have a witness.”

Collateral damage. That was how easily he waved it off. A sinless man’s soul, treated as nothing.

The air turned heavy as silence came to join your company. He walked away from you to set away your towel, accidentally catching a reflection of himself in the mirror as he did. The bloodstain was still there, coating his prominent cheekbone, a stroke of crimson over flawless white canvas. He turned on the tap, drenching his fingers with water; his expression remained unfazed. You watched him wipe the dry blood with his thumb as if it were just another stain, not remembering—not caring over—the lives he took when he got it.

“I did what I had to do,” Jinwoo uttered, popping open the top buttons of his shirt before he rested his palms on the edge of the sink. His gaze, colder than the ocean’s depths, was glued to the running water. “He deserved it.”

Deserved it? No one deserved to have their heads blown to pieces! “You’ve gone too far—”

“And I’ll do it again.” He met your gaze in the mirror, stifling your breath. “I’ll kill anyone who touches you. You’re mine. You’ll always be mine. No one can have you but me.”

Your fear of him intensified as anger radiated off of him. You couldn’t avert your gaze away, feeling like he had you by the throat. The glow in his eyes, the conviction… He meant every word.

He’s insane.

He’s insane. He’s insane. He’s insane.

I need to run. I need to go somewhere. Far, far away from him.

It might have been a rash decision—foolish, too—but it was what your instinct told you to do, and you were caught too deep in a frenzy to think straight. You tried to return to your feet, your movement hasty, uncoordinated. It was then that you realized you could barely feel your legs.

The panic attack you'd suffered through before had taken a toll on your body, forcing it to betray you. Combined with the terrifying realization of the monster he had become—no, the monster he always was—your limbs turned feeble no matter how much you tried to steel yourself. Losing your balance, you fell onto the ceramic floor, water saturating your bathrobe the same way horror pervading every line of your face.

No, move. You beseeched yourself, your vision blurring with hot tears. Please, move!

You heard the tap handle turning before his calm, steady footsteps followed. “You need to rest,” Jinwoo said, his tone leaving you barely any room to argue.

Still, fueled by your will to survive, you shook your head. “No, I need to—”

“Sweetheart.” The sudden firmness in his voice staggered you. It was never a suggestion. It was a command. "Do as I tell you to."

You couldn’t do it. You had to leave. Now. The urge for it possessed you stronger than before. With a shot of adrenaline bursting through your system, you pushed yourself off the ground. You’d crawl your way out of there if you had to. You swore it.

One step. One step away from him was all he allowed you before he captured you with one hand wrapped around your waist, dragging you back to him.

“Jinwoo,” you started pleading, your hands fisting the fabric of his shirt. “Jinwoo, please, let—” His lean fingers reached toward you, a gentle curtain falling over your eyes. As darkness embraced you, your consciousness began to seep away. “me… go…” You fell into his arms, your body limp, your lips ajar as your words died in a whisper. 

The last thing you witnessed before everything turned pitch black was a pair of glimmering purple orbs replacing the blue in his eyes. ***

Your damp strands soddened the pillow as Jinwoo placed you gently onto the sheets. He brushed his thumb against the tear that slipped past your wet lashes, his face contorting in sadness. He didn’t mean to do it, to use his magic on you, but you were panicking again, weren’t you? He couldn’t bear the thought of you suffering through another attack should it worsen.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, bestowing a kiss on your cheek. “You’ll feel better tomorrow. I promise.” He covered you with the duvet, letting it shroud you with its warmth before he’d replace it later with his embrace. “I’ll be back in a minute, Angel.”

There was one thing he needed to do, something to douse the blazing fire within him.

Peaceful in your slumber, you failed to witness the way his entire expression shifted as his eyes landed once again on the marks around your neck. With his jaw tautened and his eyes gleaming in the darkness, the Lord of the Undead stepped into his realm.

“My liege,” one of his most faithful shadows, Beru, greeted him with a deep bow as his king graced him with his presence. Endless soldiers stood on their knees behind the generals, awaiting his order. 

"Heal her bruises. Make sure she's not in any pain. Igris," his voice, enough to make all shadows tremble at the sound, rumbled deeper through the air as he turned to address the other general. “Bring him to me.”

The silent knight vanished and returned within the blink of an eye, dragging Lee Minsung’s headless corpse beneath his claws and presenting him like a gift. Jinwoo stood tall with his hands stuck inside his pockets, his gaze piercing, unforgiving.

The raging desire for vengeance rose within him once more, and this time, he knew the perfect way to satisfy it.

“Arise.”

Read the deleted scene here

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

Aegon has been in love with reader for years but she got betrothed to Aemond. She finds Aegon drunk at her door and she takes him in. He tells her he loves her and make smut happen please

I've been on a roll with these request this week! Only three days until the start of Season 2 *screaming*

Question: Should I add Cregan Stark to my character list? If yes, please send requests for him <3

Warnings: 18+, smut, drunk!Aegon, unprotected p + v, cheating (on Aemond)

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

When the news dropped, Aegon was devastated. He had always known his feelings for you ran deep, but hearing that you were to be betrothed to his own brother made him regret not asking for your hand sooner. The thought of losing you to Aemond gnawed at his heart.

In a fit of fury, Aegon stormed into Aemond's chambers, his eyes blazing with anger. ‘’You knew of my feelings for her, how can you do this to me?’’ he spat, his voice trembling with a mix of rage and desperation. 

Aemond looked up from his book, his expression calm and composed. ‘’Father wanted to unite our families. I’m only doing my duty,’’ he replied, his tone measured and devoid of emotion.

Aegon’s frustration boiled over. He slammed his fist on the table, making the goblets and plates clatter. ‘’Fuck duty!’’ he shouted. His voice broke as he continued, ‘’I just…I just want her.’’

Aemond sighed, placing his book aside. ‘’I was asked to marry her, not you. You already have the throne.’’

The throne was given to him because he was the first son. Aegon never asked for it, never cared for ruling or showed interest in politics. He would rather spend his life with you and Sunfyre than sit on the Iron Throne. 

‘’I would exchange my birthright for her in a heartbeat,’’ he confessed, his voice unwavering.  

Later at dinner, Aegon didn’t come down to eat. He couldn't beat the idea of seeing you sitting beside Aemond during a meal. So, he stayed in his chamber, drowning himself with wine. His goblet wasn’t even empty that he would fill it up again. 

He drank until the sun went down and his pitcher was almost empty, and fell asleep on his couch with his goblet in hand. It wasn’t surprising considering how much he had drunk. 

When Aegon woke a few hours later, the castle was sleeping under the cover of darkness. He stood and found himself stumbling through the corridors. His feet carried him to your door in the guest wing, having been many many times. You always took the same chamber when you visited King’s Landing. Aegon raised his fist to knock, but before he could, the door creaked open.

You expected to find a servant with your tea, but instead found your uncle Aegon. A frown of surprise and concern creased between your eyebrows. ‘’Aegon? What are you doing here?’’

He swayed slightly, leaning heavily against the doorframe with his undershirt untucked from his breeches. His eyes were red, his expression a mixture of anger and sorrow. ‘’You can’t marry him. Please, don’t marry him,’’ he mumbled, his words slurred from the wine.

You should have walked him back to his chamber or alert the Queen of her son’s state, but instead you stepped aside and gestured for him to come in. 

Aegon stumbled through the doorway, and you came to his side, helping him sit onto the bed bench. He leaned forwards as you let go of him, resting his forearms on his thighs and his spinning head in his hands. 

You watched him with a heavy heart, guilt knotting your stomach. ‘’I’m sorry for the betrothal. I wanted to tell you myself, but our parents sent the ravens before I could.’’ 

‘’Don’t marry Aemond.’’ Aegon grabbed your wrist, pulling you to him. ‘’Don’t do this to me.’’ He looked up at you, his eyes pleading. 

You stayed silent, looking down at him. There were a hundred reasons you should put a stop to this right now. Aegon was drunk. He wasn’t in his right mind. And yet, seeing him like this, vulnerability written all over him, made your heart ache for him. 

‘’You’re drunk. This wasn’t a good idea. Let’s get you back to your chamber.’’ You reached for his arm to help him up, but grabbed your wrist. ‘’Aegon…’’ you sighed.

He pulled you closer to him, but you remained standing. Aegon’s voice was barely a whisper, his words more a plea than a demand. ‘’It’s me you should marry, not my brother.’’ 

You pulled on your wrist, but his grip only tightened. ‘’Aegon, let go. You’re drunk. You don’t know what you’re saying.’’ 

He shook his head, his eyes fixated on yours with an intensity that sent a shiver down your spine. ‘’I know exactly what I’m saying. I…I love you. I always have. And I can’t bear the thought of you marrying him.’’ 

Your heart was racing in your chest. 

Despite the feud between your mothers, you and Aegon had always been close. He was there when you claimed your dragon, took the blame when you got caught stealing lemon cakes in the kitchen, and always invited you to dance at gatherings, even though he hated dancing. He even exchanged letters with you when you moved to Dragonstone, secretly writing back despite his terrible handwriting and his mother's interdiction. You were his favorite person, the only one he felt truly cared for him.

And now, he was sitting in your chamber, confessing his feelings to you out of pain and desperation.

You wanted to scream. 

At yourself for not recognizing his underlying feelings. At him for not saying those words sooner. At your mother and grandsire for arranging a betrothal with Aemond. He was closer to you in age, mayhaps it was the reason for their decision? And most of all, at the cruel twist of fate that had kept you blind to what was right in front of you.

You opened your mouth, but no words came out. Thoughts swirled chaotically in your mind, overwhelming you. You needed time to think, time to process everything. 

But time wasn’t in your hands, it was ticking and passing fast, so you crashed your lips on Aegon’s. He brought you down to his lap, deepening the kiss as his hands roamed across your hips and thighs and everything he could get his hands on in a desperate attempt to bring you closer. You could taste the wine on his lips, the bitter alcohol still lingering in his mouth. Your hands tangled in his hair as a moan left his throat, igniting the fire between two dragons.

Impatient, Aegon pulled at the laces of your nightgown while you discarded him of his undershirt and threw it on the floor. Your nightgown found the same fate, goosebumps rising across your skin from the cool air or the room. 

His hands skimmed along your sides, coming to rest on your hips as he rocked against you, his body betraying his need. The rough fabric of his breeches brushed against your bare cunt, sending a jolt of pleasure up your spine. 

Your lips moved from his lips to his jaw, trailing a path of kisses along his jawline and down to his neck. His breath caught in his throat as your lips and teeth found the sensitive spot between his collarbone and throat. Aegon let out a soft moan, his hands gripping your thighs tighter. His fingers dug into your skin, leaving small imprints that would surely turn into bruises come morning.

His hands continued to roam, exploring every inch of your body that he could reach. He moved his lips down to your chest, his teeth nipping at the sensitive skin of your breasts. You arched your back in response, the feeling of his lips leaving a trail of fire wherever they touched.

What you were doing was wrong and breaking many rules, but you couldn’t stop. It felt too good. 

Aegon pushed you back onto the bed, his body hovering over yours as he found your lips again. His hands fumbled with the ties of his breeches, desperately trying to undo them while keeping the kiss going. A soft groan escaped him as he managed to push them down, freeing himself from the constricting material. 

The feeling of his bare skin against yours sent a shiver down your spine. His body was hot and demanding as he pressed himself closer to you. A gasp left your lips when you felt the head of his cock against your folds, surprised by how warm it felt. 

You gripped his shoulder as Aegon pushed himself inside, your walls closing around him in a snug grip. Aegon’s breath hitched from how tight you felt, his eyes closing briefly as he sank deeper. The sensation was overwhelming, a mix of pleasure and pain as your body adjusted to him. 

When he started to move, you felt like he was splitting you in half…but in a good way. You clawed at his back, soft little sighs spilling from your lips as Aegon thrusted into you. 

Unfortunately, the pleasure didn’t last long. You were so wet and squeezing him too good that after only a few thrusts, Aegon spilled inside you. 

In his defense, he was drunk and not entirely in control of his cock. 

The sunlight coming through the large window woke you up. You turned away from the window and buried your face into your pillow, trying to fall back asleep, but your arm came into contact with something — someone. 

You opened your eyes, the late events of the night surfacing, and saw Aegon lying beside you. He was still fast asleep, his white hair tousled and messy. His face was relaxed, a stark contrast from his drunkenness. For a moment, you just watched him. He looked so peaceful and calm when he slept.

The light streamed over his face, illuminating the sharp planes and angles of his features. You reached out, gently brushing away a strand of hair from his forehead. 

He stirred at your touch, but didn’t open his eyes. ‘’What is it, Mother?’’ 

You chuckled softly, watching as Aegon stirred in his sleep. 

He mumbled again, shifting under the covers. His eyes still closed, he reached out blindly and brushed his fingers against your waist. The contact startled him, not expecting to find another body in his bed, and he opened his eyes. 

A mixture of embarrassment and confusion flickered across his face, remembering his drunk stumble into your chamber. 

‘’I’m sorry for last night,’’ Aegon apologized, his voice strained and hoarse because of how dry his mouth felt. ‘’I made a fool of myself, didn’t I?’’ 

You decided against mentioning his short sexual performance. ‘’More than usual? No.’’ 

He laughed, then groaned as his head pounded. 

‘’Aegon?’’ you said quietly. He hummed. ‘’Why didn’t you say you have feelings for me?’’ 

‘’Because I enjoy self-sabotaging my life.’’ 

You swatted his arm. 

‘’I need to speak to my mother,’’ you declared after a moment of silence. 

The hour was early, but she should be awake. 

You climbed out of bed, your naked body exposed in the bright light of day as you moved around your chamber. There was an ache between your legs, reminiscent of Aegon’s passage inside your intimate part. 

‘’I do not wish to go through the same suffering she endured in her first marriage.’’ You grabbed a dress from the wardrobe and dressed yourself. It was more difficult without the help of a handmaid. ‘’And I know exactly how to convince her to call off the betrothal. I broke my vows to Aemond, I let you take my maidenhood. They will have no choice but to let us wed.’’

—

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[mechncheese]

im OBSESSED with ur TC design and story for ur AU

do u have any random fun facts abt him?

You've opened up Pandora's box, TC is my favorite guy (equal with Jetfire) and I have many things planned for him !

Here are some fun Science AU Thundercracker things !

Also links to the previous Science AU TC related posts in case no one has seen him yet, We got this one, and this one

I changed his outlier ability, instead of just being able to produce loud sonic booms he has an unusually high voltage that runs through his body. Thundercracker can redirect the electrical currents in his frame to deliver electrical shocks capable of knocking a bot unconscious. A lot of the charge goes into his wings (they’re massive for a reason) leaving the rest of his body safe enough to touch.

His outlier ability is also affected through his emotions, the more distress he is the more out of control it gets.

Decepticons usually kept their distance around him, TC never really made any friends outside of Skywarp and Starscream.

Similar to IDW, TC loves writing! His favorite past time is writing stories about escapism and fantasies of running away.

TC stole a bunch of datapads from abandoned libraries and has started a collection. He keeps going back out to try and find some more.

TC tends to be passive to a fault, he hates causing problems so he will never ever admit that something is bothering him until it snowballs into a really terrible situation or he bottles up his feelings so much he ends up exploding. This is exactly what happened when he stood up for himself and this ultimately led to his defection.

He cares a lot about Starscream and Skywarp even if they annoy him 80% of the time. There was something comforting to him about their bickering and their gossip. When TC was around them, he felt at home. Well. As close as a home can feel when your planet is dying.

He wears the cloak because he finds it artsy and poetic. “A disgraced Decepticon on the run from the world!” It also kind of shields him from the harsh weather on the surface of Cybertron. With nowhere to go now, he’s just been wandering and wandering.

Ok this is going a little into story related territory ! Feel free to keep reading if you’d like !

Thundercracker didn’t want to be an Autobot at first. He was very against the idea (mostly out of fear for what might happen to him if his former coworkers found out). Optimus promised that no one would force him to pick sides anymore and TC could stay as long as he needed to.

For the longest time, TC kept his distance from the other Autobots and just stayed in his small little corner. He wouldn’t even let the medics operate on him to fix him up. Drift kept annoying him though, curious about TC’s history with the Decepticons, Drift wanted to know all about it. TC eventually opened up once Drift started giving him datapads to read in exchange for small talk.

[domoz-writes]

Am thinking about non transmigration au where SY discovers his sexuality via 400k of unposted Mobing...

My thoughts are as such:

Right before the end of PIDW Airplane posts an update that basically says "Hey due to a mix of health and personal reasons I won't be able to post for a while sorry!!"

SY, who is in the hospital with horrible food poisoning isn't happy about this!! Something like this right after a cliffhanger??? Really??? And he's not got a lot else to do In the hospital, so he kind of... accidentally... doxxes Airplane...

He was just looking for an account that he thought that hack author would check since he's obviously not looking at zhongdian, honest!!! But it turns out that this person lives somewhat nearby where SY does and is much cuter than he expected some hack author to be

So he maybe goes to wander around the area (its nearby!! He's allowed to go on walks isn't he!!) And as a matter of fact finds Airplane!! Right on the sidewalk!!!

And starts off with a rather aggressive introduction before realizing that his favorite shitty erotica author 1) has obviously healing electrocution burns, 2) is?? Way too skinny? Like on par with SY himself and hes chronically ill, 3) is standing outside a social services office and 4) appears to be carrying everything he owns with him on his back

He immediately feels so guilty that he pivots from angry ranting to guiltily offering him a place to stay or, he can at least pay for a hotel room?? SQH does a very brief amount of mental calculus on if he'd rather deal with government bureaucracy or getting kidnapped and axe murdered by a crazy fan, shrugs, and chooses the latter.

When SQH point out that he can't pay SY back in any way SY tells him that he can pay him back by writing a better novel!!! SQH teases him about being a devoted fan and offers to let him read some unpublished extras and backstory stuff (like SJ & YQY backstory, that sort of thing). Predictably, SY likes this a lot more and complains that it wasn't in the novel, in turn Airplane laments that if more readers were like SY he wouldn't be in this situation in thr first place.

Related: SQH can't update because his laptop is fried. SY claims "to know a guy". SY does not know a guy, but he has money, so... (the files are fine and saved in like 3 different cloud locations, Airplane already learned that lesson)

But PIDW ended on a cliffhanger! SY doesn't want to wait!!! So he bothers Airplane until he finds out that Airplane actually haS two endings waiting in the wings and he still hasn't decided which one to post. Reason being: he's kinda 80% done with writing a sequel of sorts, but he knows if he posts it it will basically get his zhongdian account nuked and remove his chances of making money from it ever again, because the current readers of PIDW would HATE IT

Sy eventually argues that *he's* a reader and that Airplane should let *him* read it and if he deems it good then it's certainly good enough to post!! SQH finds this very funny because SY is not the average PIDW at all, but decides to allow it

The sequel in question is a slow burn romance from Mobei-Juns point of view that leans heavily into drama and political intrigue. He stands by Binghes side and quietly pines and remains loyal and Binghe slowly discovers that devoted loyalty and understanding is actually the thing that makes him happy (vs empty relationships with his many wives)

(Mobei Jun is written in a very grey-ace way, not understanding the carnal desires of other demons but would do anything for Junshang if asked etc etc)

SY ADORES this book and thinks that if it were posted online it would be his #1 favorite. He really relates to MBJ as a protagonist and Binghe is still the best!! And then he is completely blindsided when the two of them have tender emotional gay sex

Being SY, he absolutely tries to justify this to himself as like, aha,what a clever subversion...! You can tell because this sex scene was way better written then all the ones in PIDW, but obviously they aren't gay (He is too flustered to bring this up to Airplane in person despite having no problem doing so with the het stuff)

The novel ends with, like, Bingge sealing away Xin mo and promising to be just as loyal to his general as MBJ is to him, and is very obviously romantic to the point that even SY can't miss it. So he goes back and rereads it to make sure it was actually meant to be a romance (...danmei) novel all along. And then again just to make sure and he's kinda losing his mind a little because he really related to MBJ in this book and... MBJ had gay sex??

Of course you also have the "and they were roommates" situation going on at the same time. The rituals are intricate. Airplane is aware that's he's giving SY some kind of sexuality crisis but he has no idea how intense! He's genuinely fine having an unrequited crush on SY. Homoerotically teasing him is fun and it doesn't have to go further than that! Hes not really in a place to be doing any dating anyways and bro-cuddles have him covered!

Side note: I like the idea of SY being very proud when Airplane gains weight bc its Physical proof that he's taking good care of his friend and also maybe catering to what he finds attractive

When SY finally gets to the point where he asks about his sexuality, Airplane pretty much gives him the "I don't see a point in labels, I just like who I like" speech.

SY who loves categorizing and labeling things: can you do that?? Is that allowed??????

He then gets pointed to Baby's First LGBTQ resource website, and after determining that he's maybe not gay but maybe is something else immediately jumps into googling "how to date your best friend who is also your roommate"

[berryispunk]

Your Home's Only a Town You're a Guest In

pairing: Frankie Morales x f! reader

quick note: this fic contains heavy topics such as grief and parental death so be warned before reading but I swear she's worth it 🤍

tags: parental death, stages of grief, brief mention of addiction, teenager love, falling in love again, small town, rekindling romance, soft! Frankie, girl dad! Frankie, swearing, ANGST, bad jokes, nicknames, yearning, mutual pining, kissing, friends to lovers, slow burn, SMUT (🌶️🌶️🌶️), did i mention angst?, all the emotions, reader has longer wavy hair and a fuller figure but no further physical description

summary: You never planned to return to your hometown but things change when you've got life-changing news and soon you find yourself trying to navigate the past colliding with the present.

word count: 10,6 k (don't ask me any questions 😅 idk what happened)

readable also here

When you had left your hometown almost ten years ago you had never planned to come back. 

When your mom called one day to tell you your father was in hospice care, you thought it had to be the worst day of your life. It felt like a cruel joke. Of all the reasons that could have brought you back, it had to be this—your dad, dying.

All the unspoken words between you and him came crashing down at once, knocking the air right out of your lungs. Your mother had made it clear: no one could say how much time he had left, and if you wanted to see him, you needed to come quickly.

Whenever you talked about your hometown to friends in the city, you could see the envy in their eyes. A beach town, waves always in the background—it sounded idyllic. You didn’t blame them. How could they know what it was really like to grow up in a place like Tidehaven?

The neighbors’ judgmental glances. The way people knew things about you before you even met them.

The unease that settled deeper the older you got.

How you never quite belonged—your spirit too wild, too restless for a town that wanted everyone to color inside the lines.

Staying would have clipped your wings before you even had a chance to use them.

So you left. One day, without looking back, no matter how many times your mom called, crying, begging you to come home.

Still, you dreamed about the ocean sometimes. You missed the sharp, salty wind in your face, the way it stung and soothed at the same time. You missed the quiet of sitting on the beach, listening to the waves crash against the shore, and the endless, aching stretch of the horizon.

In stark contrast, the city never slept. It was always buzzing, always alive—and that was one of the hardest things you had to adjust to when you first moved there. It was a whole different life. When you’d felt too big for your hometown, you suddenly felt far too small in the city, almost invisible. Just another face in the endless crowd.

You missed the feeling of belonging, of being part of a close-knit group. That was another thing you had left behind—your friends.

At first, you stayed in touch—thank God for technology—but it wasn’t the same.

Eventually, you found new friends in college, but they didn’t understand your struggles the way the ones back in Tidehaven did. They couldn’t share your history. They couldn’t share your pain.

You spent nights lying awake, dreading the journey back to that coastal town. But this time, there was no running, no hiding. As much as you didn’t want to, the responsible part of you won out, and you booked a seat on the next plane to the closest airport near Tidehaven.

On a late summer day—when the breeze was still warm but the air already carried hints of autumn—you returned "home."

Only, it didn’t feel like home anymore. It wore the costume of familiarity, but underneath, it felt foreign. Cold.

When you walked through your childhood home's front door, the screaking sound still the same, your mother looked around the corner and her face looked so much older even from a distance. Her hair was much greyer than you remembered. 

The worry written all over her features had made her age like a forgotten piece of furniture tarnished by the tides. You felt tears pricking in the corners of your eyes as you let your luggage fall to the ground and walked over to her and hugged her close. 

She almost crushed you with her arms and murmured, “My girl is home…” You had to bite your lip real hard not to sob. “Hey mama,” you whispered and she kissed your wavy hair repeatedly. This, you thought, felt like coming home. 

You settled down in your childhood bedroom you had outgrown long ago, everything still looked like you remembered: the posters of your teen crushes, the pink floral throw blanket, all the books scattered around the small room. It felt like stepping into a time machine of your youth. Everything was neatly preserved and it tightened the knot in your chest even further. 

You decided to visit the only place in this hellhole you were certain that had some alcohol you so desperately needed, the local bar. 

So you threw on a fleece jacket before you walked through the empty streets of Tidehaven. The night air was almost too crisp for the shorts you were wearing but you didn’t have time to worry about it. 

As soon as you reached the bar you slumped onto a stool at the bar and ordered some beverage strong enough to help you numb the gnawing pain of responsibility and regret. Halfway through your glass you suddenly heard it: a deep, familiar voice ringing in your ear. It was faint, almost not noticeable if you hadn’t listened close enough. But you listened very closely. The voice was deeper but still unmistakingly recognizable. So you whirled around on your bar stool and spotted him in a booth in the back of the bar, together with the same shared group of friends he had always been with. You froze in your seat and contemplated simply leaving, but you couldn't. 

Could it really be him? 

You tried to watch him as unobtrusively as you could but of course he noticed you staring  and as your eyes locked it felt like time stood still, your chest immediately constricting, almost suffocating as you turned around and prayed that he hadn’t seen you. But of course you weren’t so lucky. When were you ever lucky? You emptied your drink quickly before you gestured to the barkeeper to give you a refill. 

“Do you mind?” The voice from earlier, now dangerously close, asked you. 

You shook your head, but you didn’t dare to look up. You knew it was him without looking. 

“I’d say it feels like seeing a ghost, but I guess seeing ghosts should be scary. This isn’t scary, this is–” 

“Sick? Twisted?” You interrupted him and you felt his confused eyes on you without ever having to look up. He laughed softly, the sound deep and rich as he ordered a drink for himself before sitting down on the stool next to yours. 

“That wasn’t what I would’ve gone for but okay,” he said and you finally decided to look at him and immediately wished you hadn’t. It was him, no doubt. The same dark brown tousled locks poking out from under the old, worn-down baseball cap. The same warm brown eyes, slightly glimmering in the dim light of the bar. A slight stubble on his chin and cheeks that looked like it might need a trim soon. The same almost pouty lips, slightly dry looking and you wondered if this man knew chapsticks existed? His shoulders were so broad, his biceps so muscular when they flexed slightly under the jeans button-down he was wearing. You couldn't help but stare at him when he crossed his arms in front of his chest. This wasn’t the Frankie you’d last seen the night before you left. It was a new version, Frankie 2.0. The adult version. 

He didn’t even flinch when you checked him out, your eyes dancing over every one of his unique features, trying to make sense of it. Putting together the puzzle pieces of the old Frankie and this rendition in front of you. He looked nothing like the tall, slender guy you had a huge crush on when you were a teenager but still it was him. 

The warm expression on his face, an identical lopsided smile you remembered. But there was more to it. It was the way he handled himself - much more confident, taking in his rightful space. And the way his frame was built made him almost intimidating, if you hadn’t known better. 

Well, you used to know him but how could you know if he wasn’t able to break you in half with these arms of his? Ten years had done a lot to his frame and you had a really hard time searching for words when you finally turned back around to sip at your drink. 

“You know steroids are dangerous, right?” you scoffed and he gave you a deep, rumbling laugh. 

“I guess you refer to my arms with that? I wanna let you know that it’s all just training and nothing illegal, I promise” 

You couldn’t help but chuckle at his remark. 

“What did you train for? A bodybuilder contest?” you quirked an eyebrow and he shook his head, a grin still on his face. “Army,” he answered and you searched for his eyes. 

“You’re in the army?”

“I was. I left last year. Wasn't useful anymore after this grenade exploded near me and the debris hit my leg during battle.“

“I am sorry.”

"No need," he said, waving you off with a casual shrug. "But you know," he added, taking a sip of his drink, "spending years in it and then getting spit out like you didn’t literally sacrifice your life for your country… it doesn’t exactly feel good."

“Sounds awful…”

“It is.” 

There’s a beat of silence before he asked, “What are you even doing here? You made it very clear that you’d never return.” 

Was his tone accusatory or hurt? You couldn’t really tell. 

You scoffed scornfully. 

“Believe me, wasn’t my first choice,” you rolled your eyes before you sipped at your drink again. 

He didn’t answer, instead he took a sip from his own, the ice in it clinking against the glass. 

“My dad, he–” You couldn’t finish the sentence, too painful, too uncertain. 

“I heard about your dad,” he said cautiously, his words measured. 

“Of course you did,” you said bitterly. “This is Tidehaven, gossip spreads faster than a damn wildfire.” 

“I am sorry, hermosa.” 

The nickname made you nauseous immediately and you glared at him, your gaze probably full of venom. He had the audacity to sound sincere.

“Save your words for someone who cares,” you spit out, slamming money on the bar and standing up so abruptly the stool scratched loudly on the floor. His eyes were on you in an instant, eyebrows furrowed deep. 

You headed towards the exit with fast steps, wanting to create some distance between him and all the feelings you had kept buried for so long. Out of all people it had to be him.

You didn’t have time for this, you couldn’t afford to be distracted. 

When you reached the doorway of the bar his hand grabbed your arm, determined but not painful as he said, “Please, stay. I just… I just want to talk. I am sorry if I said something wrong. We just met again, please.” 

His eyes were nothing less than pleading and you frowned heavily. 

Under any other circumstance you would have loved to stay and talk, catch up on what you’ve missed over the years but right now the weight of everything threatened to crush you any minute and you were too tired for all that. 

“I can’t Frankie, I am sorry,” you said and you meant it even when you freed your arm from his grip and walked down the steps to the road. The gravel crunching under your shoes, echoing through the eerie silence of the night as you walked as fast as your feet and equilibrium could handle. 

You didn’t know if he’d kept standing in the doorway and watched you walking away or not, but something told you he had. Even if everything in you screamed to turn around you didn’t, because you knew that he’d be the one person able to tear down your walls that you had so arduously built around you. 

As you laid in bed later that night with your window open the sound of the waves lulled you into a restless sleep and you found yourself in a common dream landscape. The beach. 

But this time it was different. Somebody sat on the sand, the person’s back turned but you immediately knew it was Frankie, only he wore a cap at the beach. But as you approached him his figure dissolved, turning into smoke and when you finally stood where he had sat he’s gone fully and you sank to your knees, burying your head in your hands and starting crying. 

When you wake up the next morning your pillow is full of tears and you felt like you got hit by a truck. A silent bing from your nightstand catched your attention when you lift your phone to see the notification and you immediately sat up in your small bed. 

“Hey, this is Frankie. Sorry, got your number from your mom. 😅 Let’s meet at our place at the beach at 3 pm.” 

Frankie had been a pilot. He had served in the army. He had faced life-threatening situations, trained himself to stay calm under pressure no matter what. But today, sitting on the pier with his feet dangling over the water, his heart raced like he’d just run a damn marathon.

He checked his digital watch. Two minutes to three. His hand started patting nervously against his jeans-clad thigh. What if she didn’t show up? What if he made a complete idiot of himself?

When he saw you yesterday at the bar, it had been like getting struck by lightning. The sight of you hit him so hard it made his chest tighten painfully—almost as bad as the panic attacks he sometimes had from flashbacks to his army days. Maybe even worse.

He forced his gaze out over the ocean, letting the sound of the waves crashing against the shore wash over him. It was calming enough that he dared to close his eyes for a moment.

But even then, the images of you haunted him—the girl you had been and the woman he saw yesterday blurred together in his mind, burned into his memory so deeply he couldn’t tell where one ended and the other began.

Your eyes were still sad, but now there was a flicker of curiosity in them too. Your hair still tumbled in wild waves past your shoulders. And you still wore that slight, ever-present frown, like you were carrying the weight of the world on your face. 

To be fair, you were probably having the same thoughts about him—at least judging by the way you looked at him last night. Pure disbelief, maybe even a little shock.

Lost deep in his thoughts, he suddenly felt a shift beside him, the weight of someone settling onto the pier. His eyes snapped open just in time to see you drop down beside him with a loud, weary sigh, slumping onto the worn wood.

He didn’t dare to say anything, afraid you may leave as soon as he opened his mouth. 

Your gaze was fixed on the horizon as well before you started speaking “Wasn’t sure if I really came until the last minute.” 

“I am glad you did” he replied, his own gaze still on the horizon before he added “How are–”

“Are you seriously asking me how I’m doing, Frankie?” your tone was biting.

He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly as he mumbles “Guess so.”

You shook your head and scoffed. “I am doing absolutely great. I am back in this hellhole, my dad is dying but I don’t know when so I’m stuck at the one place on earth I don’t wanna be at,” you rumbled. 

Frankie could feel your frustration and hurt seeping out of every word. But mostly he could feel the sadness. You had a way of covering your real feelings under a heavy load of sarcasm, you always did. Some things never change, he thought. Even if the woman sitting next to him looked and handled herself so different from the girl he used to know, under all the layers of pain and heartbreak it was still you. 

“I am sorry, hermosa. I really am,” he said sincerely and for a fragment your facade crumbled, the worry and all the other negative emotions flickering over your face. 

"Can I do something?" he asked tentatively.

You shook your head again.

Straightening a bit in your seat, you tucked your hands under your thighs, your feet still dangling above the ground. Your gaze drifted to the water. "How have you been? Did you never leave Tidehaven, or...?"

He took a deep breath. "I did. Left for basic training, joined the military. Spent most of my time overseas—missions, wars, fights in and out of my job. But hey, at least I could fly an aircraft."

"Wait..." You blinked, caught off guard. "You were a pilot?"

His mouth quirked up. "Yes, ma’am. I could fly anything, but if I had the choice, I always picked helicopters."

"Wow." You exhaled, and his faint, proud smile lingered—for a moment.

"Well, technically, I was a pilot. Lost my license a while back."

Your brows knitted together. "Oh? Why’s that?" You had never shied away from the real questions. You still didn’t.

"Drugs."

"Drugs?" A beat. "Consuming or smuggling?"

His lips pressed together. "Consuming. Coke, to be exact. Definitely not my brightest moment." He exhaled through his nose. "I’ve been clean for over two years now, though."

"That’s... great." Your voice was thin, unreadable. Surprise? Judgment? He couldn’t quite tell.

A stretch of silence settled before you spoke again, softer this time.

"Do you... have a family? A wife?"

Another sore point.

“I have a daughter, Sofía. She's two years old now and lives with her mom. We’re divorced for almost as long as she’s old. I married her mom Ella because I thought I needed to, my parents doing the rest, you know how old-fashioned they are. We have shared custody and I see her as often as I can.” 

You chuckled. Of course you remembered about his parents. You weren’t allowed to stay overnight at his house when the two of you were younger, but that didn’t stop you from sneaking around anyway and finding other places to make out at.

“I thought I’m doing the right thing, you know. Being responsible. Truth was, even if Sofía is my everything, she wasn’t exactly planned and her mom and I were already thinking about breaking up before she found out that she was expecting. So, I felt the need to stay and I really tried to be the man Ella needed me to be but I failed miserably. Being coked out all the time doing the rest. The short temper and not to mention the financial aspect of the addiction. All my money I earned went straight to drugs or stuff we needed for our child. So I quit the drugs cold turkey, being clean as soon as Sofía was born and by God, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But as soon as I held this little girl in my arms everything kind of fell into place. I know it probably sounds super cheesy, but it’s the truth. This little girl was my new anchor, my reason to keep clean and to show up. And it worked out for a few months. But her mom and I didn’t. We kept fighting over the smallest things and I was so close to relapsing because of the emotional turmoil that we, in good terms, decided to call it quits. To be honest, I think we never were a good match anyway, but I’ll be forever thankful for the result of it: my daughter. Her mom is with this guy called Clint now and honestly, they really found each other. She even married him last year and is expecting her second child. And I hope she’s happy, it seems that she is at least. She deserves the good life I wasn’t able to give her.” 

He took a deep breath. It had been a long time since he had talked this much—especially about his life. But you had a way of coaxing things out of him without pressuring.

You would have had every right to judge, to ask more questions—questions he would have answered truthfully, even if they hurt—but you didn’t. He looked at you for a moment, studying you, wondering if he had bored you with his rambling. But you just kept your gaze fixed on the vast expanse of the ocean, the ghost of a smile on your lips before you finally turned to him.

"So, Frankie Morales is a daddy?" you asked, almost mockingly.

He grinned in response.

“I am a daddy. Does that make me a hot dilf now?” he joked and promptly earned a shoulder bump and an eye roll from you. That was the sassy side of you he had missed so much. 

“And you? Do you—?” 

“Hell no”, you laughed. “Kids aren’t for me. At least I never saw myself as a mom and to be fair I never had a partner long enough to even have to worry about the possibility of that.” 

He nodded, maybe frowning a little bit too.

“Where have you been the last ten years?” 

You shifted in your seat before answering. "The city. I went there for college and stayed for the job I got after graduating. It’s so, so different from here. All the lights, the endless ways to waste money, and the even easier ways to waste yourself."

You trailed off, your gaze suddenly distant.

"The city is anonymous. Buzzing. She’s like an animal—alive and thriving as long as she’s being fed. And in my case, that meant my hopes and dreams, I guess." You tried to joke, to make it sound casual, but Frankie saw right through it. You were disappointed.

"The city was always your dream. Your light was too bright, your spirit too big for this sleepy town. What changed?"

"I did," you said sharply. The words hung heavy between you.

Silence settled, broken only by the rhythmic crash of waves against the pier.

"It’s not that I regret leaving, really. But it was nothing like I expected. I thought moving to the city would magically make me feel better, but it only made things worse. I felt so lost. So alone.

The friends I had—our friends—either stayed here or scattered across the country. I thought chasing my dream would make me feel complete. But instead, it shattered me even more. Because now, I have two places I call ‘home’... and neither one really feels like it."

Your words struck a chord deep inside of him. He knew the feeling of not belonging, especially after leaving the military. 

He stayed silent, waiting if you maybe opened up some more, but you didn’t.

"So, do you have someone in the city waiting for you when—if—you return?"

"No," you answered, and somehow, it filled Frankie with relief.

"How about you?" You let your gaze roam over him for a moment, scanning him in a way that made him unusually nervous.

"No one," he said quietly.

"Good." A small smile tugged at your lips before your eyes drifted back to the horizon. "Where do you live? Your parents' house?"

"Sí. It’s just my dad now, you know. My mom died last autumn."

"Oh, shit," you murmured, brows furrowing. "I’m sorry, Frankie."

He sighed heavily, his shoulders slumping. The memory of his mother’s passing still settled in his chest like a weight he couldn’t shake.

"I—" He hesitated. "I don’t know how much longer my dad has. They were together their whole lives, and he’s so lost without her. No matter how hard I try, I can’t fill the space she left behind."

"That’s not your job." Your voice was steady, certain. "Your job is to be present. To let him know he’s not alone. And I’m sure you’re doing everything you can—he knows that, too. It’ll never be the same again, sadly. Just… cherish the time you have with him now, yeah?"

There you were. Beneath all the stoicism, the tough exterior, the lingering sadness. You cared. You always had. And you always made his problems feel a little less heavy. It was one of the things he had adored about you, something he had deeply missed.

"Guess I may have to count on you now," you said, attempting lightness. "In the ‘I lost a parent’ department. Haven’t got any experience in that."

He chuckled. "Wouldn’t recommend it. Zero out of five stars. But… I’m here for you. If you want me to be."

You turned toward him, lips pressing into a thin line as you held his gaze. A long beat passed before you finally said, "I’d love to have you around. After all, you might be the best thing this place has ever had—well, besides the beach, of course."

He raised an eyebrow. "Is that a compliment?"

"Ooooh, Morales, don’t get cocky now." A smirk played on your lips. "I was just trying to be nice, you know. After everything you told me, you might be just as lost as I am."

"Noted." He nudged your shoulder gently. "For the record, you’re also the best thing this place has ever seen." His voice dropped slightly as his gaze flickered to the water below. "And… I missed you."

Maybe he had said too much. Maybe he had overestimated the fragile bond rebuilding between you. But if he had learned one thing after losing his mom, it was that you never know when you’ll get another chance to say something that matters. So he said it.

Just as he considered adding something to soften the weight of his words, he felt you lean in, your head resting lightly against his shoulder.

Your voice was nearly swallowed by the waves, but he heard it.

"I missed you too."

Frankie’s heart skipped a beat.

The two of you stayed like that, unmoving, as the sun dipped below the horizon, casting everything in soft, golden hues. And for the first time in a long time, he felt exactly where he needed to be.

Days blended into weeks with Frankie by your side. You spent every waking hour together. Eating with his dad, cooking together, going for walks at the beach. If you weren’t at his house, he was at yours, eating with your mom, making her laugh even if anything else felt so grey and heavy and the health of your dad was quickly deteriorating. The first time he came over for dinner he apologized for intruding, but your mom shrugged it off and said it was typical for you to bring anyone home like strays. Frankie shooted you a look at the word ‘stray’ and you smirked in response. It was this day his nickname ‘stray cat’ was born and it became a habit calling him that ever since.  

Frankie was the light in the darkness for you. He was your lighthouse guiding you in the rough sea that called itself your life and even if you swore you wouldn’t let anyone close enough to hurt you again, Frankie tore down your walls brick by brick without your alarm bells ringing. He was patient, he was understanding and he never demanded anything. He was happy with what you offered him as long as it meant he could be by your side. 

One evening, as the two of you sat on the front porch of his house, the breeze had grown too cold for summer clothing. You had stupidly neglected to pack anything warmer in your hurry, and you shivered against the harsh ocean air. Frankie rose from his seat on the bench without a word and disappeared inside. When he returned, he handed you one of his hoodies.

"You’re freezing, hermosa," he said softly.

You looked at him, deeply touched by the simple, thoughtful gesture. It was the kind of thing that made you feel warm and fuzzy inside. You quickly pulled the hoodie over your head, and the moment it settled on you, it felt like a warm embrace. His scent was everywhere, wrapping around you like a cocoon, and it made your chest tighten with affection.

You cared for him so deeply, maybe even falling in love with him again. But you kept a respectful distance, knowing he was the one good thing in your life right now. You couldn’t afford to lose him, not because of your usual mess of a relationship track record.

“Thank you” you smiled softly at him and he nodded, the charming boyish grin on his face making the butterflies in your stomach go wild. 

“Can I ask you something?” you asked tentatively. 

“Sure.” 

You took a deep breath to collect some courage. 

“Why did you never reach out to me? After I left, I mean. Our friends did, they texted and sent me photos. But you…” 

Frankies face darkened, his brows furrowed deep. Something unreadable in his expression. “Honestly? I thought you didn’t want me to do that. You were so convinced to leave everything connected to Tidehaven behind I thought it included me. I had your number,my thumb hovered over the call button more times than I would care to admit. I wrote probably hundreds of texts but ended up deleting them all. And the more time passed, the more silly I felt. So I just checked in with Santi or Benny, who knew how you were and even if I was happy to hear that you were good I still selfishly wished I would know it myself.”

“Frankie,” you interrupted, “I cried my eyes out for weeks because I didn’t hear from you again. I thought you just forgot about me that easily, I thought you never really cared for me in the first place or at least not enough to reach out. Santi told me you joined the army, he gave me your number and I wanted to call you, but what could I possibly have said ? ‘hey, it’s me, you remember me? i was the girl helplessly in love with you but you just ditched me like a fucking prom date’”

Frankie audibly inhaled, his gaze fixed on the ground under his feet. 

“I didn’t ditch you. You were the one that left, remember? I never forgot about you, never.”

“It would’ve been so easy. One message, one call, anything to show me that you still cared” you said, each word tasting bitter on your tongue.

“I never stopped caring, hermosa.”

He could’ve shot you or stabbed you, and it would’ve hurt the same as his words just did. Hot, angry tears blurred your vision as you stood up, walking out of his house. With every step you took, the vice around your heart tightened, and by the time you reached your own house, you quickly ran upstairs into your room, throwing yourself onto the bed. You buried your face in the pillow and let it all out—crying the frustration, the hurt, the anger. It was a dangerous cocktail of emotions.

Your phone buzzed multiple times on the nightstand, and you knew it was probably Frankie, but you weren’t ready to talk to him. You needed time to process this.

You didn’t know what hurt more: his absence, or the fact that your mom kept asking if he was okay because he hadn’t eaten with you for a few days. She should’ve been asking how you felt instead.

One evening, just as you were setting the table for dinner, the doorbell rang. Maybe it was one of the neighbors returning a container your mom had lent them when she shared some leftover food. She used to cook for a whole football team, after all.

“I’ve got it!” you called out to your mom as you opened the door. It wasn’t a neighbor. It was Frankie. Live and in color.

“Hey,” he murmured, lifting his baseball cap and running a hand through his hair before he placed it back on. He always did that, even back in high school when he was nervous. Some things never changed. Even though the adult Frankie was physically so far from the slender boy he’d been ten years ago, beneath the broad shoulders and strong arms, there was still that same boyish heart.

“Hey,” you answered, your voice sharp, the contempt probably written all over your face.

“Honey, is that…?” Your mom’s voice joined the two of you in the hallway, and her whole face lit up as soon as she spotted Frankie standing in the doorway.

“Frankie, come on in. Food’s ready,” she called, waving him in. Frankie glanced over at you first, silently asking for permission, but you just huffed and rolled your eyes as you stepped aside and closed the door behind him.

He followed your mom into the living room, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he stood there, uncertain. His tall, broad frame filled the room, but even so, he seemed smaller than usual, much less confident than you remembered.

“Have a seat, Frankie,” your mom said, placing the food on the table. The aroma was mouthwatering, and your stomach growled in anticipation.

“Thank you, Mrs. Davis,” he said politely as he sat down across from you.

You kept a hawk-eyed watch on him as your mom put food on his plate, acting like it was the most normal thing in the world. You, however, were still seething beneath the surface. Your mom, blissfully unaware of the conversation you’d had just a few days ago, went on as if nothing had happened.

“How’s your dad doing, hun’?” she asked, diving into small talk. Wonderful.

“He’s alright. Maybe a bit lonely. He’s started doing crosswords, and sometimes I can talk him into taking a walk with me. But he misses my mom… and so do I.” His eyes suddenly darkened with sadness, and for a moment, you forgot about your own anger.

“Yeah, I can imagine…” your mom murmured, her gaze falling to her plate as she poked at her food. She felt it too—the looming grief, the quiet anticipation of the day when your dad’s heart would stop beating. It mirrored the sorrow Frankie had spoken of. She would feel lonely too, and that reality made your chest ache.

You reached out under the table, gently patting her thigh in silent reassurance, earning a small, tight-lipped smile in return. You instinctively turned your head towards Frankie, and as if he could sense your gaze, he was already looking at you.

After a stretch of uncomfortable silence, your mom changed the topic, asking Frankie about his daughter. Suddenly, the man in front of you transformed. He straightened in his seat, a wide grin spreading across his face as he started talking about Sofía.

He was practically glowing with pride, telling you all about her love for animals and drawing. You could feel something stirring in your chest as you listened. Daddy Frankie was a whole new person—genuinely happy, talking about his child with such enthusiasm that it was contagious.

You couldn’t help but smile too, especially as his grin widened when he told stories about her potty training or the time she accidentally made a somersault trying to reach for something. It was absolutely adorable. By the end of the evening, everyone was in good spirits, the earlier tension forgotten. Your mom, always eager to meet new faces, insisted that the next time Sofía visited, Frankie should bring her by so she could meet her. He agreed happily, his joy still evident.

When you brought Frankie to your front door, he stood in the doorway, rubbing his neck sheepishly. “Thanks for not kicking me out…” He stifled a laugh, and you shook your head.

“Thank my mom, not me. If it were up to me, you wouldn’t have even made it inside,” you crossed your arms, a slight edge to your voice.

“I know, I—look,” he started, taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry. And I know no amount of words can undo the damage I did. I was an idiot. But I like you so damn much, and it’s killing me not to be around you, especially now that I finally got you back. Please, yell at me, hit me, do anything you want, but don’t push me away again.”

His eyes. Those damn puppy-dog eyes were lethal as he searched for yours, and you sighed.

You crossed your arms before responding. “We were young and dumb. We both made mistakes. I guess I can forgive you, stray cat.” You even managed a small smile, and he mirrored it with a soft one of his own.

“Thank you,” he murmured.

“Don’t make me regret this,” you warned, lifting your index finger in a mock-serious gesture. He raised his hands in mock resignation, then said, “Come here.”

He pulled you against his chest, his arms wrapping around your waist. You hugged him back, burying your face in his shirt, smiling as you inhaled his familiar scent.

“You’re so goddamn stubborn, hermosa.”

“I am well aware,” you mumbled, but the grin on your face was brighter than the porch light you both stood under.

You lifted your head, your chin resting against his chest. He looked down at you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. You leaned into his touch, your head resting in his big hand. His breath hitched slightly at the simple but undeniably intimate gesture. His hand wandered from your cheek to your chin, pinching it gently as he grinned at you.

“You’re as infuriating as you’re beautiful, you know that?” he whispered, his eyes flickering between your lips and your eyes so quickly you might have missed it if you weren’t this close. You bit your lip, your own eyes lingering on his lips, which looked so plush and kissable in the dim light of the front porch. He bit his lip for a moment, his gaze drifting away. He was battling with himself, you could see it.

“You’re gonna kiss me now or what ,Morales?” you challenged. 

His head tilted back towards you immediately, his eyes confused for a second before they turned soft again and without missing a beat, he dipped his head to kiss you. A quick, cautious peck first, kind of testing the waters, assessing the damage he may have done but you just grinned at him and your hand found the back of his neck, pulling him down towards you and kissing him deeply. It was incredible. If you thought kissing him as a teenager was an experience then this was a whole damn revelation. His lips were familiar yet new, every movement more purposeful than the last, as though he’d spent years wondering how this moment would feel. His hand found its way to your waist, fingers barely brushing your skin as he deepened the kiss. The tension that had built up over years, over missed chances, vanished with the first taste of him.

His hand tangled in your hair when he walked you back until you hit the facade of your house with your back. His knee between your legs and his hard frame pressing you against the wall. His tongue now seeking entrance into your mouth, exploring every inch of you as you tightened the grip in the nape of his neck, gasping softly into the kiss. It felt like burning up from the inside, but it was worth it. “Dios”, he cursed against your lips. “We have to stop,” he almost whimpered as your foreheads rested against each other, both of you panting. You opened your eyes back up and his gaze on you was dark as you caressed the back of his neck. “I don’t want you to stop” you mewled and his eyebrows raised up, almost disappearing under the visor of his cap before he murmured “Are you sure?” 

“I am” you reassured him and without hesitation he grabbed your hand and led you through the empty streets of Tidehaven towards his house. The street lights illuminating your way and tinting everything in a mysterious glow.  

When you arrived at his house it was dark, no light on despite the one on the front porch when he impatiently fumbled with his keys to let you both inside. You giggled softly and suddenly it felt like all the years back when you were teenagers that were afraid to get caught. 

His hand settled on the small of your back, guiding you inside, and the moment the door clicked shut, he found your lips in the darkness again, pressing you against the door. His hand gently cupped your cheek, and his kiss deepened, as if he couldn’t get enough, like he had been waiting for this moment far too long. You couldn’t help but giggle at the mix of eagerness and the familiar thrill of the situation, whispering, “What about your dad? What if he—?”

He trailed his lips from your mouth to your jaw, then down your neck, his breath hot against your skin. His voice came out hoarse as he whispered, “He’s taking sleeping pills. He won’t wake up easily. But if you’re too loud, I’ll have to find a way to keep you quiet.” His grin was wicked, and then his mouth was on the sensitive spot right behind your ear, sucking softly and drawing a quiet moan from you, making it impossible to stop the rush of heat flooding through your veins.

It was like a switch flipped inside of Frankie as he hooked his hands under your thighs, lifting you effortlessly, his mouth still attached to your neck. He carried you down the hall, opening the door with one hand while keeping you secure in his grasp with the other. With a swift kick, he closed it behind you as soon as you were inside. There was no need for lights—only the cold, blue glow of the moon outside illuminated the room. Gently, he lowered you onto his bed, hovering over you. Though the darkness surrounded you, his eyes were intense, fixed on you, making your heart race in eager anticipation.

“Are you sure you want this?”, he asked again. You never were more sure of anything.

You just nodded as you started to undress him, starting by pulling his shirt over his head revealing a strong chest and a softer belly. You traced your fingers along his sides and he flexed under your touch. This body was different from the one you remembered. It changed, made room for some extra weight around his midsection and some scars adoring his beautiful lightly tanned skin which weren’t there the last time you saw him naked. 

But he was still undeniably attractive, if not more with the strong arms and broad shoulders. A trail of dark, soft hair along his stomach, around his belly button and ending right over the belt of his jeans. You started kissing his neck, nibbling at his collarbone and he rewarded you with a sharp inhale of air. You took your time, drinking him in and he started kissing you back, his teeth grazing over your soft skin as soon as he discarded your shirt, leaving you only in your black lace bralette. He kissed down between the valley of your breasts, his breath hot against your skin as his hand found the clasp of your underwear. “Can I take this off?” he asked. 

“Yes”, you breathed and he opened the clasp, the straps gliding down your shoulders, his fingertips never leaving your skin as the fabric slid off and left you exposed for his exploring hands and hungry gaze. 

He was transfixed, his gaze almost reverential as he took you in. 

“You’re even more gorgeous than I remember, hermosa” he whispered as he started kissing your shoulder. It made you feel desired but also so vulnerable. You weren’t used to praise and most importantly not to someone being this gentle with you. 

“Well, I was still a teen back then. I changed… got fatter,” you complained but he quickly shushed you with a kiss.

“You may have gotten more soft but you’re still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. Give yourself some credit.” 

He was sincere in the way he looked at you, his fingers still tracing over every dip and curve of your exposed skin, every stretch mark you hated so much and your heart constricted in your chest at his gentleness and the way he didn’t seem to care at all. 

You fought so hard to keep the old feelings from resurfacing, but it was a losing battle. He didn’t even need to try—his natural attentiveness had always been one of the things you adored most about him.

His lips moved lower, grazing your skin softly as they found their way to your breasts, kissing each one gently before his tongue swirled around your hardened nipples, giving each breast equal attention.

His hand massaged the one he wasn’t focused on, and he groaned softly against your skin, the sound sending a shiver down your spine. His hips started to roll against you, seeking the friction you both so desperately craved.

Instinctively, your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer as you met his movements with a soft thrust of your own. The unmistakable hardness of him pressed against you, even through the fabric of his jeans. Your hands moved quickly, undoing his belt and zipper, pulling the fabric down along with his boxers.

He wiggled out of his pants and was back above you in an instant, quickly removing your shorts and underwear.

As soon as the last piece of clothing was gone, the air between you crackled with a charged mix of anticipation and something deeper—an unspoken connection that left you breathless, unable to quite name the feeling pulsing through the room.

He stopped his administration on your chest and kissed all the way back up to your neck and to your jaw until he found your lips again. It was a messy, open mouthed kiss as you wrapped your arms and legs around him, pressing him als close against you as you could, wanting to feel every inch of him. 

His skin hot and melting yours, every nerve ending of yours on fire.

“Do you need me to get a condom or are you on birth control?” he asked and in every other circumstance this would be a mood killer, not with Frankie though. 

He was responsible and you appreciated that greatly. 

“I am, don’t worry” you breathed into the dark. 

He searched for your eyes before his hand wandered down your body, his fat fingers sliding between your folds, already wet and leaking just from making out with him as he grinned satisfied, his teeth flashing in the pale moonlight.

“Damn, so wet all because of me?” he teased and you glared at him. 

“Don’t tease me, Morales”, you warned, trying to sound at least a bit firmer than you felt inside but you clearly failed. 

“‘m sorry” he purred as he latched onto your neck again, his flat thumb now pressing against your clit while the other two digits glided inside of you. You moaned instantly at the impact, one hand finding his soft locks, helplessly pulling at them as he pushed them in-and out of your slick with practiced ease.

The noise it was creating was almost obscene but you couldn’t find yourself to care. After a few movements you felt him shifting slightly, his hand now on his hardened cock, giving himself a few strokes before his tip teased your entrance and your grip on his hair only tightened. 

“Frankie, please” you whimpered pathetically. 

“I know”, he assured you, gripping your thighs and pulling you just a tiny bit closer to him, lifting your hips slightly before he finally, torturously slow, eased into you and stretched you out completely. 

You didn’t remember if he was that big when you still were younger, but god damn that hurt. “Fuck”, he hissed. “You’re so damn tight I can’t–” he rambled helplessly as his head rested against your shoulder. 

You wiggled impatiently, wanting so desperately for him to start moving. “It’s okay,” you murmured. “You’re not hurting me.”

Your confirmation was what he needed so he bottomed out completely, his pubic hair tickling your most sensitive area and it was heavenly. 

He moaned deeply as your nails found his shoulder blades, digging into his flesh as his grip on your hips tightened as well, the intensity almost bruising. 

“I wanted this for so long, dreamed about this…” he whispered against your hot skin, like it wouldn’t change everything. 

It made your heart skip and you inhaled sharply. 

What were you even supposed to answer when he was balls deep into you and your mind too dazed to form any coherent thought? 

His thrusts were deep and powerful as if he wanted to show you with every single one how much he cared for you, how much he needed you. It was unlike anything else, the air thick and sultry with the smell of both of you and all the unspoken words between you. 

This was a declaration on its own, one you weren’t even sure you were ready for, but there was turning back now. 

You held desperately onto him as his movements fastened and grew more determined. 

He gritted his teeth thrusting into you relentlessly while still making sure you never felt uncared for when he placed soft kisses everywhere he could reach. 

“I-I’m so close, please don’t stop…” you moaned, pressing yourself against his hard frame. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he answered and without warning he took you at your ankles, pulling you up until your heels were resting against his shoulders and the new angle was incredible. He stroked your cervix with every snap of his hips, deliciously deep and mind altering. 

In this position he grabbed your tits with his big, calloused hands, kneading them before his thumbs played with your nipples and it was all you needed to find your release. 

You clenched tightly around him and he hissed in response. 

“Yes, I need you to come for me. I need to– fuck!” he cursed as you felt him pulsating inside of you and following your climax just seconds later. He painted your inner walls with thick ropes of his cum and didn’t stop spilling into you as you cried out his name almost too loud for the quietness of the night. 

His whole body shuddered against you before he gently let your legs sink down and collapsed next to you, panting heavily from exertion. His cheeks slightly flushed.

You turned onto your side to face him. Your hand reached out, stroking some damp strands that stuck against his forehead from his face as you grinned widely. Utterly satisfied and spent you mumbled “Not bad, stray cat” and it was a weak attempt at a joke because you were still equally as breathless.

“Not bad?” he choked out, his face mock shock as he turned his head towards you. 

“I am wounded, hermosa,” and you both laughed in unison. 

He pulled you against his side, his arm wrapped around your shoulders and kissing your hair. 

It should’ve felt foreign, maybe even a bit awkward—but it didn’t. Instead, you felt a sense of contentment, one you probably hadn’t felt in a long time. It was a strange mix of comfort and unease, both comforting and terrifying at once.

You drifted into a deep sleep in his arms, his thumb gently tracing circles on your back. You weren’t sure how long you slept—probably not long—but when you finally opened your eyes, the light hit you with a sharp intensity, almost burning your vision.

You groaned, blinking a few times as the bright sunlight hit you. Doesn’t this man have blinds?

Still mostly naked, you turned around and stretched, feeling the impact of last night in every fiber of your body. Reaching beside you, you expected Frankie to still be there, but the bedside was empty. You turned your head sharply, sitting up with the blanket barely covering your modesty.

You stretched out an arm to grab your phone, checking the time—or maybe hoping for a message from him—but there was nothing. It was 7 a.m. You fell back into the pillow with a heavy sigh, brushing a wild strand of hair out of your face.

The fall hit you harder than you cared to admit. You should’ve known better. He’d gotten what he wanted, and now he was gone. Leaving you alone in his damn bed, in his parents’ house, casting you aside like you were nothing. Like all the others before him had done too.

The hot feeling of anger built inside you just as the bedroom door creaked open.

You didn’t even bother to look up, your arms crossed as you started at the ceiling. 

Suddenly you felt a weight on the edge of the bed and the next thing your senses catched was the smell of freshly brewed coffee before his voice broke the silence.

“Good morning, I made us some coffee. Thought you may appreciate the liquid gold after last night”,his voice nothing more than a soft gravelly rumble in the stillness. 

You propped up on an elbow to be able to look at him. His hair was a messy mop on his head, wearing the same t-shirt from last night and his boxers only. 

It was a delightfully disheveled sight to behold. 

His eyes were tired but his smile, God his smile, was brighter than the sun shining through the windows. 

“I thought you changed your mind”, you pouted. 

His brows creased in confusion. “Changing my mind about what? You? This?” 

You nodded as you reached for the coffee cup he placed onto the bedside table. 

“Never. I was just up a bit earlier and made sure to get us some coffee and maybe some breakfast too if you’re up for it.” 

You sipped at the coffee, the hot liquid almost burning your lips. “Breakfast sounds great” you mumbled but not looking up from your mug. The steam dancing between the two of you he extended his free hand to rake it through your hair, a soft but mischievous smile on his lips. 

“What is this smile about, Morales?” you asked and his smile turned into a full blown grin.

“I was thinking maybe we can go for round two before we grab some breakfast. Unless you’re too tired–” 

You placed the coffee mug on the bedside table again before he even finished his sentence. You climbed into his lap, straddling him and his arms wrapped around you immediately. The sun was shining through the windows, creating a soft halo around you as his hands danced up and down over your bare back, the golden hues in his brown eyes sparkling when he looked up to you, tilting his head slightly to have a better look. “I could get used to this” he murmured against your skin, kissing your forehead, your temple, followed by your nose before he captured your lips in a soft kiss. 

“You better do, because you won’t get rid of me that easily from now on” and it was a promise. 

Five days later your dad died. He stopped breathing during the night and when your mom entered the bedroom her scream echoed through the whole house. It was exactly as awful as you imagined it to be, maybe even worse. You tried your best to be there for her,making sure she ate enough. But most of the time she was staring out of the window or playing absentmindedly with her wedding ring when she sat at the diner table, the same tea cup in front of her as in the morning. The days dragged on, functioning on autopilot and everything felt heavy and tinted in grey. Frankie never left your side, held you close the whole night until your tears subsided and you passed out from exhaustion. 

At his funeral it was raining. How fitting, you thought to yourself. The sky mirroring your agony. 

Everyone in Tidehaven attended the funeral and you didn’t want to see any of them. No one cared for you or your mom when he still was alive, they didn’t need to pretend they did now. It was hypocritical and your contempt grew even more. This was all this town could do after all, pretending. 

Frankie’s hand was on the small of your back the whole time, his intense gaze flickering through the crowd to check for any potential misbehavior, but nobody acted up thankfully. It were just the same old judging, tired glances as usual.

As the casket was lowered into the soil you couldn’t hold back a silent sob as your mom reached for your hand and squeezed it so tight it almost felt like breaking. You didn’t dare to say a word the whole day. You felt paralyzed for a time after that.

Frankie’s presence was a silent shadow at your back. When you asked your mom if she needed anything, he mirrored that same quiet gesture for you. It was that day, despite never having believed in it before, that you were certain you would marry this man. He was your rock through it all—never complaining, never demanding anything—just offering silent support whenever it was needed.

When the worst was over, the grief only an unwelcome guest in the back of your mind you started to find some solace again. Sitting at the beach, listening to the waves crashing, even some music. You would probably never be the same again, but maybe that was okay. The old you never felt at ease somewhere. Not in the city, not in Tidehaven. But you felt at home in one place: Frankie’s arms. 

You ended up staying in Tidehaven for way longer than you would’ve imagined. Weeks turned into months, into a year. You watched nature go through the seasons while you did the same. You changed, in more ways than one. When they were disappointment and sadness before it evolved into something more positive. Frankie made you see things differently. You started to experience real joy again. Not every day was perfect, of course not. But you finally felt like you belonged. Something you searched for your whole life. Turns out the only thing missing was him. All the pain you endured in his absence led you back into his arms after all. As summer approached again, the two of you sat together at the pier, watching the sunset. Without warning, he dropped to one knee and asked if you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him. It wasn’t a grand, romantic gesture—but you didn’t need that. You knew, without a doubt, that his words and actions were sincere. And that was all you needed. Tears streamed down your face as you agreed, and he hasn’t stopped smiling since.

“Hey dad,” you said as you kneeled down onto his tombstone, placing fresh lilies, his favorite flowers, onto it. You gently removed some fallen leaves from his grave. “Just came to tell you the news. Frankie asked me to be his wife and I said yes. How could I not? I wish you could see how happy he makes me, daddy. He’s also a damn menace sometimes, but he…he can handle me. And you know, how hard that is. After all I come after you with my stubbornness,” you chuckled softly. “I would’ve loved to have you walking me down the aisle. I know you and I weren't always on good terms, but I think this is something so special for a daughter and her dad and I am sad we can’t experience that together,” your voice was slightly breaking as you played with your engagement ring. A simple silver band with a small diamond princess cut. “I love him, dad. So so so much. But I also love you and I miss you and I am sorry I wasn’t always the best daughter and I am sorry I left you alone with mom for so long. I wish I could go back in time to spend more time with you. Even watch these damn quiz shows you loved so much with you where nobody really ever won something for real. I’m gonna keep a chair empty for you at the ceremony. You can imagine how excited mom is for this damn wedding. I guess for a time she lost hope her daughter would ever settle down. Well, for a long time I did too. But he changed my outlook on things. Oh and, I am also a stepmom now. You know I never wanted kids, but I love Frankie’s daughter endlessly and I think maybe she doesn’t find me that bad as well, at least I hope so,” you exhaled deeply before you finally rose back to your feet again, spotting Frankie standing a bit far off, a soft smile on his face, his hands folded demurely in front of his pants crotch. 

You lifted a questioning eyebrow. “How long are you standing there already?”

“Not for long”, he answered as he stepped towards you. “You okay?” his brown eyes worried. 

“I am. Just told my dad about all that happened. Give him a quick summary, you know,” your left hand resting on Frankie’s chest, your thumb gently stroking the fabric of his Henley, your gaze fixed there. “It’s getting easier, coming here.” 

“Yeah, I know. It’s kind of healing isn’t it ? Having a place to still be able to talk to them.”

You nodded. “Did you visit your mom already?” 

“No, I was hoping you would come with me. So I could show her your ring and all,” he took your hand that was on his chest, kissing your knuckles, his thumb tracing over your engagement ring. 

“Yeah, sure,” you retorted as you searched for his eyes. “You think she’ll approve ?” 

His lips lifted up into a lopsided smile. “No doubt.” 

He took your hand in his as you walked over the cemetery. It was quiet and peaceful. In the past you kind of avoided places like this because your thoughts would be too loud when your surroundings were silent like this but that finally changed now. 

As you reached the grave of his mom, fresh flowers in the vase he must’ve put in there before you came here, you stopped. His hand still holding yours, his grip slightly tightening when he looked at you, his gaze a mix of different emotions. 

He never brought you here before and you knew how important this was for him. 

You squeezed his hand reassuringly, giving him a tender smile, trying to give him the same amount of support like he always did. He lowered his gaze a bit as you turned your head towards the grave, still holding his hand, not budging even a bit as you hugged his arm now with your other hand. 

“Hey, Mrs. Morales. I don’t know if you’re aware but I am pretty much in love with your son and I can’t wait to marry him even if I never thought I’d do that honestly”, you snickered and Frankie scoffed softly next to you. 

“He’s a good person. The best if I may say so myself. You would be so proud of him, I know that, because I am. And I am also so damn grateful to be able to call him mine.” 

It was silent for a long, meaningful moment after you finished speaking, the only sound was the soft pattering of the starting rain and Frankie’s breathing which was a bit ragged. 

“Let’s get you home, okay?” he spoke silently, his voice slightly hoarse with emotion.

You tightened your grip on his arm and placed a soft kiss against the side of his neck, your breath ghosting over his skin.  “I am already home.”

thanks so so much for taking the time to read. please show some love, we writers live for that <3

my masterlist - in case you’re hungry for more :)

[wonubby]

Let Down - K. BAKUGO

CONTENT WARNING: angst, bakugo's death mention, hurt/comfort, established relationship, childhood lovers

ZEE SPEAKS: It's 5am, probably unedited and im spiralling; this is for my own sake. also i havent read/watched this scene, i've put it off so forgive me for any mistakes

WC: 926

"when i'm older, i'm going to grow wings!" katsuki pumped his tiny fist in the air, his voice filled with enthusiasm.

"woah, kacchan! you're so cool," the girl sitting next to him gasped, her sparkling eyes fixed on her friend.

"and i promise to make you my wife, y/n." with that, the boy took off, leaving the girl a blushing mess.

he lied.

katsuki bakugo was a fucking liar, and y/n would never forgive him.

now, at seventeen, he lay on the ground, his shell shattered, blood flowing out like that of a crushed insect. it was quiet for a while. not a single word uttered in the cold, dreadful atmosphere.

then, a wail shattered the silence—a sound so gut-wrenching it could break hearts.

everyone knew who it belonged to.

y/n. none other than bakugo's girlfriend and childhood friend. the pair had been inseparable since kindergarten, refusing to do anything if the other wasn't present. it was cute. everyone who had met the two joyous kids knew they had a bright future ahead of them—one that included getting married and having as many babies as possible.

but now, that future was gone.

it ended the moment his body hit the floor, a hole in his chest.

"get up." a harsh whisper filled the air, followed by the sound of hurried footsteps.

"i said, get up." the voice repeated, snappier this time, filled with nothing but rage. "you're not allowed to die, asshole. get up!"

she was screaming now, falling to her knees, shaking the lifeless body of her boyfriend.

best jeanist approached the girl, trying to pull her away from the boy’s unmoving form.

"y/n, stop. you need to stay calm. edgeshot is doing his best," he reasoned, only to be met with a cold, tear-filled glare.

"shut the fuck up."

the words stunned him. in all his years of knowing y/n, she had never been one to cuss.

"i'm not letting him get away with this. he's going to come back. he will—he has to. h-he—" a sob ripped through her chest. "he promised! he said he'd keep fighting, that if he fell, he'd grow wings."

"he's a fucking liar."

by now, she was full-on sobbing, clutching the lifeless body of the boy she had planned a future with.

a few minutes passed, and nothing changed.

y/n buried her face in his bloodied chest, her tears mixing with the crimson.

best jeanist tried to de-escalate the situation.

and bakugo... still dead.

by now, izuku had arrived at the scene. he let himself soak in the devastation for only a moment before surging toward shigaraki, fueled by a newfound rage.

that's when y/n realized what she had been doing. instead of helping and trying to defeat the villains, she'd been wallowing selfishly.

just like izuku, she got up, ready to head to the battle—until she heard it.

the quiet and gentle call of her name. it tugged at her heart. one she could recognize in a heartbeat. y/n thought she was hearing things. there was no way he could say anything—he had a hole in his chest for god's sake!

shaking off the feeling, she continued walking.

"y/n..." there it was again, still quiet but very real.

with a heavy heart, y/n slowly turned around, her eyes filling with tears almost immediately.

there he was—bakugo katsuki, alive.

the boy she swore to cherish with her entire being, alive.

his eyes were soft, full of remorse, as they locked onto hers.

"you asshole!" y/n screamed, her voice breaking with a mix of anger and relief. she stormed over to him, face flushed with fury.

standing before him, she planted her hands on his fully healed chest, lightly punching him with all the strength she could muster. her body shook with emotion, thrashing in his arms as he held her, trying to calm her down.

"i fucking hate you! how dare you just—die like that?!" she yelled, her anger almost drowning out the relief she felt. tears blurred her vision, but beneath all the rage, bakugo could feel her gratitude. her happiness that he was alive.

"i know, baby, i’m sorry," katsuki whispered, his voice cracking with guilt. he reached out and pulled her into his arms, wrapping them tightly around her.

the force of his embrace made her body tremble, but she didn’t pull away. she buried her face in his chest, sobbing uncontrollably.

katsuki’s eyes shimmered with tears, though he kept them at bay, not wanting her to see him vulnerable. still, a single tear slipped down his cheek as he held her close, feeling the warmth of her body against his.

they sank to the ground, both of them trembling. y/n clung to him, her sobs echoing in the stillness, but now they were softer, like the release of everything she had been holding in.

"i was so scared," she whispered, her voice muffled against his shirt. "i thought i lost you... i thought i’d never see you again."

"you won’t lose me, i swear," bakugo murmured, pressing his cheek to her head, his arms never loosening their grip. "i’m not going anywhere."

they sat there for a long time, the world around them fading into the background as they held onto each other. for once, there was peace, just the two of them, wrapped in the comfort of knowing they’d made it through the storm together. no words were needed. just the steady rhythm of their hearts beating in unison.

© 2025 wonubby— All rights reserved. Please don't post my work as your own on any other sites.

[lyssasdrafts]

unrequited love (part 2) — azriel x reader

description: (part 1) azriel realizes you’ve been avoiding him, he confronts you and the mating bond snaps between the both of you.

includes: angst with a happy ending, mating bond, emotional azriel

@cumuluscranium @anuttellaa @cupidojenphrodite @saltedcoffeescotch @tele86 asked to be tagged for pt2 !!

azriel didn’t deserve a mate.

he never once bothered to consider himself as someone who could be loved. he wasn’t beautiful or charismatic like rhysand, he wasn’t strong or resilient like cassian. azriel was the boy who had grown up in isolation. the boy who never once saw the light outside his window. the boy who was left alone in that cold cellar for so many years, who had the scars to show for it. who could ever love someone with a past like that?

azriel knew he wasn’t easy to be around. he saw the way that you shivered when you first met him, the way your gaze always drifted whenever it met his eyes. was he really that intimidating? azriel saw the way you hesitated around him, how nervous you were when he spoke. he felt the way you stared at him whenever you thought he wasn’t watching. for whatever reason, it made his heart beat faster whenever you did that.

you were just one of the many people he’s probably scared. azriel knew he could be quite uninviting towards the people around him . even when he tried to start any conversations, the way the words became dry on his lips and his voice left his throat felt discouraging.

his friends always laughed and talked around him while he reluctantly nodded along and gave small smiles. his family, his friends. azriel sometimes wondered why they stayed with him for long, the centuries they spent as a court blurring together and they still never urged him. they never overstepped his boundaries, perhaps because they didn’t care enough, or perhaps they knew he wouldn’t talk about it. but perhaps that was a good thing. nobody questioned the dark look in his eyes whenever he came back from his missions, rhysand just nodded and told him that he did a good job, moving on to his other high lord responsibilities.

azriel watched as rhysand taught his son how to fly, the way his friend grinned proudly whenever nyx stretched out his tiny wings. he found it within himself to smile at the sight of them too, despite the feeling that something heavy weighed in his heart, something that weighed his every movement.

azriel took a glance at the childhood that he never had, the one that he never will have, he corrected. azriel would never forget the days he’d spent alone, trapped in that dark cellar. he wondered if the light within his eyes that slowly dimmed each moment that passed would ever return. perhaps it was unfair for azriel to wish for someone to make it come back. it was unfair for him to ever wish himself upon anyone.

he was reminded of all this again when cassian had asked you about having a mate, to which you softly answered “no.” at least that made the both of you.

“what about you, azriel?” you asked him. the glint in your eyes, your pretty smile, it took everything within himself to say no to you. he stared at you for a moment before giving his response, as sharply as possible.

“i don’t have a mate,” azriel said coldly. “and i don’t want one.”

you nodded politely in response, the smile suddenly fading from your lips. you glanced at cassian, seeming uneasy. he watched as cassian walked you home, feeling a pang of envy in his chest that you hadn’t trusted him instead. azriel shook off the feeling, perhaps there had just been something wrong with him that day.

and since then, azriel began noticing your quiet absences from his life. he heard the wind carry away your laughter from afar, he witnessed the way you joked and smiled as usual at training. whenever he came around though, it would be dead silent. azriel once met your gaze everyday at training, only for you to start looking at the ground now when speaking to him.

he didn’t know he started envisioning you whenever he closed his eyes, how your words echoed through his mind when he was supposed to be asleep. he didn’t realize how attached he was to your presence, how much he longed for you.

azriel had always known longing. azriel longed to feel comforted, to feel loved. to be touched and held with the intimacy that he only watched his brothers feel with their own mates. but somehow, he only wanted it to be you. it was strange, the way his feelings gravitated towards you.

he needed to confront this, he needed to confront his own attraction towards you and why you had ignored him.

he tried seeking you out after practice, but instead you kept walking away, turning away at the sight of him only for him to find you again in another room alone. azriel leaned against the door frame, blocking your exit so that he could speak with you.

“you’re avoiding me,” azriel said.

your eyes widened in shock at first, you hadn’t realized he would even notice you. your face twists, “i haven’t been. you just don’t seem interested-”

“did i do something wrong?” his voice shifted, his tone softened. azriel looked down on you with his hazel eyes, pleading for something, anything. you gave him a glare before muttering a quick, “no,” and walking towards the door.

he grabbed your wrist, a chill went down his spine. the moment stopped for both of you, simply staring at each other in silence. the realization flashed before him as he looked into your eyes, how they stared up at him in anticipation.

azriel suddenly felt that tug on his heart, the same one that connected him to you. that explained the attraction, the longing, the desire that he felt for you. you were the other half to his broken, fractured heart. the tears stinging in his eyes clouded his vision but he still moved his hand to wipe your own tears off your face.

“you’re my mate,” he whispered to the world. but more importantly, to you.

it suddenly occurs to him that you knew. you knew he was your mate. you had sensed it before he could and tried to ask him. but instead of returning your feelings, azriel had shut you out. you can’t bring yourself to do anything other than repeat his name to yourself.

“azriel,” you say softly before you let yourself fall onto his chest. he wraps his arm around you, his newfound mate, the missing piece of him.

he tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear, his scared hands still trembling to touch you. it had been his touch that sparked the bond to snap for you. “i’m sorry,” azriel muttered. “i’m sorry, y/n.”

you shake your head at his words, letting him know he shouldn’t apologize for anything. you hug azriel back, breathing in the feeling of having your mate with you.

“you’re not…” he begins, “you’re not afraid of me?” the hesitancy in his voice, a vulnerability that he’s never shown before. azriel wondered about what you would think of him if you knew about his past, his story, the reasons behind the scars on his body and the memories he tried so desperately to forget.

had he really deserved your love? you were so bright and joyful, lighting up any room you walked into. azriel had believed that he would only dull your light, that he would hold you back. he had never intended to reject you, but he would still loathe himself for the time to come for doing so.

you cup his face with your hands before looking into his eyes, “you never scared me, azriel.”

[gay-dorito-dust]

remember when you did the HSR hurt/comfort reader getting injured? i absolutely NEED one with gallagher, gepard and a character of your choice. you dont have to do this right away! just been thinking about it ‼️

Blade:

Feral. Absolutely feral.

This man gets somehow even more deranged the moment you get injured.

He’s pretty much foaming at the mouth like a rabid dog the moment his eyes noticed that you were unresponsive. If anything seeing you borderline catatonic tore Blade apart in the most painful way possible, just as his desperation to get to you before anyone else could do further harm became his mission.

Bodies were going to pile up real fast as Blade practically glides across the battlefield with grace, precision and a determination to eliminate any and all that stood to stop him from getting to you.

The destruction Blade left behind in that moment was unlike anything anyone has ever seen and Blade became a lot more dangerous man than before, many have reasons to suspected that he might’ve been holding back, and it wasn’t until now did they truly believe that their theory had weight.

After getting you away from everything Blade stayed incredibly close as you got patched up, going so far as to growl and snap at anyone or anything that he believed posed a threat to you or wasn’t doing their job right; he’d even pull out his sword as an silent threat/warning as to what was to come should you get worse rather better.

‘Blade I’m fine.’ You tell him, trying to stop him from killing the poor doctor who had just stitched up the last of your wounds. ‘I’m going to be fine, just please for my sake don’t threaten people who are just doing their job.’

‘I don’t trust them.’ Was all he said while holding your hand, rubbing the back of it with his thumb.

‘The wounds were too deep Blade,’ you began, ‘trust them or don’t but that doesn’t change the fact that they saved me.’ Blade didn’t say anything after that but from the clenching of his jaw and the conflicting emotions flickering in eyes, it was clear that Blade was still very much conflicted about everything.

Needless to say that after you had properly healed from all your wounds, Blade became unbearably overprotective of you much to your dismay, but if it was going to silence his doubts for good then you were more then willing to leave him to his own devices.

Gallagher:

Is more concerned about your well-being and getting you the medical attention that you required than anything else. He could have the perpetrator sniffed out within minutes, but would rather spend those precious minutes making sure you were okay and that you were going to be okay by medical professionals.

He doesn’t care if he gets shit for not having his priorities straight by Sunday, the winged cunt could fuck off and die for all Gallagher cared, because at the end of the day he was always going to choose to take care of you over his job.

He’d naturally give the job of hunting down the perpetrator to someone else of equal rank while he decides to step away from everything to take care of you as the doctors instructed. For there was just no way in hell would Gallagher abandon you when you were bed bound, it just didn’t sit right with him.

‘You alright sweetheart?’ He’d ask as he helps you sit up in bed. ‘I’m okay Gallagher thank you for everything.’ You said, smiling up at him. ‘It’s not a problem.’ Gallagher replies as he sits on the edge of your bed, flashing you a smile. ‘As long as you’re okay, that’s all I care about.’ You furrowed your brows. ‘Won’t Sunday be on your case for slacking off on the job?’

‘Maybe but who cares when that winged rat has been slowly loosing control of everything for a while now.’ The brunette said as he then shrugged his shoulders. ‘But all I care about right is making sure that you’re happy, healthy but above all, safe.’

‘But I’m already those things regardless.’ You said, squeezing his hand as he chuckled, kissing the side of your head softly. ‘Then I’ll just have to keep up the good work then hmm?’ He says cheekily before winking and lifting himself off of the bed to fetch you food and medicine for your recovery.

Gepard:

Much like Gallagher, Gepard is more concerned either your well being more so then anything else because to Gepard, you and your safety were his number one top priory.

However after seeing you get injured, he feels as though he had failed you or wasn’t fast enough to get to you, and will let it eat away at him for a long time too before you have to step in and remind him why that was absolute bullshit.

Afterwards Gepard would treat you like porcelain or glass whether he was aware of it or not. You understood why but after a while when you began to get better you’d have to start telling him to cut it out.

You’d might to sit him down and gently tell him that he didn’t always have to treat you as though you were going to break after every minor inconvenience. Gepard would immediately go red in the face and apologise for over stepping, but you’d only smile and hold his burning face in your hands and pressing kisses into his skin, which would only make his face burn even redder then before.

He’s just a sweet soul who’d do anything to protect his loved ones and takes it rather personal when he couldn’t when he shouldn’t, but that’s just the way he was and you loved him for it very, very much and you remind him of that every single day. After all at the end of the day Gepard only wants you to be safe and heal at an acceptable rate, he would even go as far as to monitor everything closely so that there be no room for any possible health complications.

Seeing you injured had made Gepard more scared more than he’d like to admit, and he would do anything and everything in his power to prevent it from happening ever again, because for as long as Gepard was still breathing he’d dedicate himself to being your shield for the rest of your lives together.

And that’s a hundred present guaranteed.

[moonpascal]

IN THE SHADOW OF MEMORY

CHAPTER TWO series masterlist

SUMMARY II WC: 2.1k

After the tense encounter with Theo, you’re unsettled and distracted.

WARNINGS

angst, migraines, anxiety, feelings of emptiness

AUTHORS NOTE

this is more of a filler chapter. this took many rewrites and i’m hoping this is good enough! (although this plays into deathly hollows it will not follow it. mostly used it for the room of requirement scene). thank you for all the love on the first chapter!

Thank you thank you @amiableness for reading this and listening to me stress over it all! i love you! 🤎

You sat at the Gryffindor table, staring blankly at your plate. The usual warmth of the Great Hall—its lively morning chatter and clinking dishes—felt distant, like a scene observed through a glass wall. Harry and Hermione were talking softly beside you, but their words barely registered. Your mind kept circling back to the hallway, replaying the way Theo had looked at you.

The cruel words you’d hurled at him still echoed in your mind. Theo’s eyes, filled with anger and hurt, kept flashing in your memory. You couldn’t shake the image, nor could you understand why it affected you so deeply. It was just Theodore Nott-a Slytherin you barely knew. So why did the thought of him in pain twist your insides with guilt?

“Harry, why was Nott so mad at you?” Your voice cut through their conversation, drawing startled looks from both Harry and Hermione. They exchanged a brief, tense glance.

Before Harry could respond, Ron interjected. “Doesn’t take much to set that lot off. Probably thought he looked at him funny.”

While Ron’s words had a grain of truth, they didn’t fully explain Theo’s reaction. Although Theo wasn’t innocent, you’d noticed he rarely got into fights unless provoked—though no one deserved to be hit regardless of their reasoning. Yet, with Harry involved, and given the Slytherins’ usual treatment of him, it was hard to dismiss Ron’s comment. Theo often stayed in the background, smirking as others were bullied, but he rarely got his hands dirty.

The way Theo treated the other years was something you despised, and you always stood up for the victims of Slytherin cruelty. The frustration bubbling inside you mixed with an unsettling feeling you couldn’t quite place. So you simply hummed in agreement.

Your head throbbed, a constant reminder of the earlier events of the past 24 hours. As you pushed your food around your plate, you kept glancing at the doors to the Great Hall, expecting someone or something to happen. Hermione must have noticed because she nudged you, pulling you back into the conversation.

But you didn’t catch Harry and Hermione’s silent exchange, too lost in your own thoughts. Everything felt off today, your emotions were raw, on edge. Whenever you tried to pinpoint the source of your unease, it slipped away, leaving you more confused.

It didn’t make sense. Nothing had happened to make you feel this way—at least, nothing you could recall. You’d woken up in the hospital wing with a headache and a vague sense of confusion, Theo strangely sitting nearby. But Madam Pomfrey had assured you it was nothing serious—a bump on the head, perhaps a little too much stress. As she gave you a sleeping draught to take later.

So why did it feel like something was missing? Like a piece of your heart had been taken, leaving behind a hollow space?

Harry was speaking again, his voice soft with concern, but you barely heard him. You nodded automatically, forcing a smile that didn’t reach your eyes. You just needed some fresh air, some time to clear your head. Maybe then the tightness in your chest would ease, and the world would stop closing in on you.

You excused yourself from the table, ignoring the worried glances from your friends as you slipped out of the Great Hall. The cool air in the corridor was a relief, and you took a deep breath, trying to calm your racing heart.

But even as you walked aimlessly through the castle, the unease persisted. It was like an itch you couldn’t scratch, a sense of dread that clung to you.

You leaned your forehead against the cool glass of a window, closing your eyes. You just needed to rest, to give your mind a break. Maybe you’d take that draught soon.

As you walked into class, a wave of whispers followed you, accompanied by fleeting glances. Normally, you were used to blending in—not exactly shy, but not someone who sought the spotlight either. Today, though, it felt like everyone had something to say about you, twisting your stomach with discomfort.

You kept your head down, heading for a seat in the back, hoping to escape the attention. You set your bag on the table, pulling out your parchment and quill with slightly trembling hands. The pounding in your head was getting worse, each throb making you consider skipping the rest of your classes.

You rubbed your temples, trying to soothe the ache, so focused on your discomfort that you didn’t notice Theo slipping into the seat beside you.

When you finally looked up, your body tensed. Theo’s jaw was tight, his expression hard. You knew why—your argument had been harsh, and the guilt that had been gnawing at you all morning flared up again.

You were surprised he sat beside you, thinking he wouldn’t want anything to do with you now, especially after this morning’s exchange. Let alone being this close to anyone outside of Slytherin. But you knew you had to apologize for saying those awful words in the heat of the moment. Just as you lifted your arm to nudge him, Lavender turned in her seat, her eyes landing on you with concern.

“Hey Trouble, how are you feeling?” she asked softly, nervously glancing at Theo. “I heard you were in an accident. I was worried, but was told no visitors.”

You blinked, confusion flickering in your mind before you forced a response. “I’m… okay, I think. It must’ve been a pretty bad fall since I’ve had this migraine all day,” you tried to joke, but the weak attempt didn’t erase the worry in her eyes.

Before Lavender could say more, Theo cleared his throat, shooting her a look that made her quickly turn back to the front just as the professor began the lesson.

You struggled to focus on the lecture, as the pounding in your head intensified. You sighed in frustration, squeezing your eyes shut to block out the lights and noise. The migraine was worse than any you’d had before, leaving you anxious, wondering if there was more to your accident than you remembered.

Just as you were about to spiral into worry, you felt a subtle pressure at your side. Theo had leaned closer, his arm brushing against yours as he reached for some ink.

Normally, you would’ve tensed at the invasion of your personal space, but instead, the warmth of his presence was oddly grounding. The anxiety and pain that had been building all day eased just a fraction, allowing you to take a breath that didn’t feel so tight in your chest.

Whether intentional or not, Theo stayed close, his side pressed against yours, a silent connection that gave you a fleeting sense of calm.

As the lesson dragged on, the professor’s words blurred together, becoming an indistinct hum in the background of your thoughts. Despite Theo’s comforting presence, the tension in your body refused to fully release. You could feel his gaze on you from time to time, a mix of concern and something you couldn’t quite identify.

When the class finally ended, students began gathering their things, eager to leave. You remained seated, reluctant to move, still grappling with the persistent ache in your head and the knot of emotions in your chest. Theo didn’t make a move to leave either. Instead, he waited, his presence steady beside you.

Finally, he broke the silence, his voice low and concerned. “Are you okay?”

You hesitated, wondering why you felt so vulnerable around Theodore of all people. “I don’t know,” you replied quietly, your voice tinged with exhaustion. “I feel like something is wrong, but I can’t quite pinpoint it.”

Theo’s eyes softened, and he slowly turned to face you fully in his chair. His hand hesitantly moved to rest on top of yours, his touch soft and anchoring. It made you feel worse, knowing you’d said such harsh things to him, and yet here he was, comforting you—someone you never expected to show this kind of care, let alone toward you.

You took a deep breath, gathering the courage to say what had been weighing on you all day. “Theodore, I’m sorry,” you began, your voice soft but sincere. “I’m sorry for what I said earlier. I was scared and angry, but that doesn’t make it right. It wasn’t fair, and you didn’t deserve it.”

You could see him visibly deflate, as if your apology wasn’t what he was hoping for. But he quickly masked his emotions, sitting straighter with a blank expression.

“It’s fine,” he said your name, like it pained him to say it. “I shouldn’t have reacted like that.”

His dejected tone caused an ache in your chest. You’d never had a one-on-one conversation with Nott until today, and it felt off.

You wanted to say something to comfort him in return, but a sharp pain in your right temple made you recoil, and Theo quickly caught you before you could fall from your chair. His touch sent another wave of warmth through you.

“Woah easier there, what’s happening?” Theo’s words cut through as you blinked, trying to focus.

“I’m fine. I think I just need some rest. I’ll see you around, Theodore. Thank you,” you murmured, gathering your things and half haphazardly shoving them into your bag. You walked out of the class, feeling his gaze on you the entire time.

The further you got to your dorm, the more uneasy you felt, your mind racing trying to grasp at something.

When you finally reached your room, you immediately collapsed onto your bed, your bag dropping with a thud as a vial rolled out.

You’d completely forgotten Madam Pomfrey had given you a sleeping draught and took it without hesitation and settled into bed, too tired to notice the faint vanilla and cigarette scent lingering.

The sleeping draught did its job, but only for a few hours. You woke up feeling empty, at least your headache had subsided. The dreams that had visited you were oddly vivid—filled with a gentle comfort and a loving presence—but no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t place where they came from.

In your dream, a faceless figure held you close, murmuring sweet nothings into your ear, placing delicate kisses on your shoulder. The love you felt in the dream was almost overwhelming, as if it was something you’d known for years. But every time you tried to focus on the details, a sharp jolt in the back of your head pulled you away, leaving you more confused.

You tried to fall back asleep after noticing it was well past midnight, meaning you’d missed the rest of your classes and dinner. Feeling restless, and knowing your dormmates slept like the dead—or with silencing charms—you decided to tidy up your side of the room. It was messier than you remembered.

As you gathered your clothes into a neat pile, you spotted some jumpers and hoodies you didn’t recognize. Frowning, you folded them and placed them next to your trunk, deciding to ask about them later. Then you noticed a green tie peeking out from under your bed. You sighed, assuming it was one of Grace’s latest conquests leaving their things behind, and tossed it onto her side of the room.

Once everything was in order, you turned your attention to the blank picture frames scattered across your desk. Which was odd not recalling when you bought so many. You’d just have to take some photos to fill those soon.

As you undressed for a shower, your fingers brushed against a cool metal object resting against your chest. You hadn’t noticed it before, and a sense of unease settled over you. Gently lifting it into view, you realized it was a locket—intricately detailed, with your favorite flowers etched in gold on the surface and your initials engraved on the back.

You tried to open it, but it wouldn’t budge. Maybe it was just designed that way, you thought, but the fact that you couldn’t recall ever owning it puzzled you. Curiosity piqued, you took it off, intending to examine it later. But as soon as the chain slipped from your neck, a sudden wave of emptiness washed over you, leaving you breathless.

Without thinking, you clasped it back on, and the feeling slowly faded. You decided to leave it there, too tired to worry about it out now. You’d ask your friends about it in the morning.

After a long, hot shower, you finally climbed into bed, wishing for more dreams of the faceless figure who had brought you such a profound sense of comfort and safety.

If you enjoyed, please reblog or comment! Your words keep me motivated to write.

dividers from @saradika-graphics

[scoutswritingcorner]

omg can u do an angel dust x masc/male! reader ans husk x gn! reader (or huskerdust x masc/male reader either or is fine) that is basically the hozier song too sweet ☹️☹️ i think the song would work so well for them, esp since they both think that their partner could do so much better than them??

sorry if this ask is a little confusing 😭 my brain isnt working correctly

Sweet

HuskerDust x Male!Reader

TW: ANGST

A/N : I LOVE YOU SO MUCH- I WANTED TO WRITE THIS FOR SO LONG BUT KEPT PUTTING IT OFF-  

Husk sat behind the bar watching Angel as he was on his phone, it was too early for him to be up but Alastor and Charlie had pulled him awake for some odd reason. Which had subsequently made Angel wake up and go with him, you had yet to be awake or you were already awake just too busy. He didn’t really know. It wasn’t until the doors opened and you walked in still in your work clothes from yesterday, did you even sleep at all last night?

He watched you walk over, pressing a kiss to Angel's cheek as you slid them both coffee. “You sure you aren’t an angel, sweets?” Angel hummed as he held the coffee closer to himself and you chuckled, “No, I just know when you both wake up you both are grumpy until an hour later.” You hand Husk the steaming cup of coffee, “Thank you, Babe.” he grumbled out as you shot him a wink and grabbed your cup before excusing yourself to get busy with working. 

“He may not be an angel but he’s a fucking life savor.” Angel smirked at Husk, who only nodded and sipped at the coffee. Husk watched your form disappear down the hall, both men’s hearts were sent fluttering hearing your laughter echo down the halls of the hotel. Even if it was early, you were bright and bubbly as ever. Something that took even Husk to see, you were too sweet for both of them. 

~~~

Angel was never good at his emotions especially now when he was on a fucking chain. He hated being pitied and he even hated it when people tried to downplay his sufferings. So when he was pissed he did everything he could to strike hard and fast, pulling out the shittiest part of someone else and using it against them, allowing the venom to lace his tongue as he talked with so much anger that he was sure he’d break himself.

He stays away from his phone when working, he doesn’t need Valentino to find out about you and Husk, he’s scared to find out what he’d do. He knows you worry, he knows but he’s just focused on getting the job done to get home to you both, his loving boyfriends. Once he gets back to the hotel he immediately goes to the bar, Husk checks in on him softly while pouring him a drink. Soft whispers as Husk holds one of Angel’s many hands. Angel teared up as he felt you hug him from behind, the glass of whiskey in his hands shook, he was so tired.

 “Want me to run a bath?” You had asked softly, no hint of pity anywhere in your voice. Only the question that made his heart swell up in happiness. He sent a wordless nod towards you and Husk who had now busied himself to clean up the bar for the night. You pressed a kiss to his shoulder carefully squeezing him into a hug before quickly making your way up the stairs to start a bath for him. He sipped on the whiskey, allowing it to burn his throat as it went down, “..how did we end up pulling the sweetest demon this side of hell?” He asked, watching as Husk only glanced back for a second busy making sure the bottles were actually locked up. Charlie had made it into a rule so no one could steal any at night.

“I don’t know but I’m not afraid to say it’s a miracle.” He replied standing up to his full height to stretch his wings out with a yawn, “C’mon, Angie..let’s go get you a bath and some well deserved cuddles.” He whispered, holding his hand out to Angel, who graciously took it after knocking back the rest of the whiskey. “He could do better than us..” Angel whispered as Husk wrapped an arm around him, guiding him up the stairs. “..I know..” Husk whispered out his wings folding onto his back.

~~~

As you all laid in bed, you snuggled between both men as you carefully rubbed Angel’s back as Husk curled up behind you purring loudly. Both men dead asleep as you stayed up admiring them both. Their hands rested on your side, intertwined with one another, your hand stopped to rest on Angel’s lower back. Eyes slowly closing as both his snores and Husk’s purring allowed your body to fully relax.

Slowly drifting off to sleep you reached behind you to scratch at Husk’s cheek, which made him softly chirp and rest his head on your shoulder, “I love you both..you’re almost free to be who you wanted, just need a couple more days..hang in there for me.” You whispered out to be met with soft snores and heavy purring. 

You’d sell your soul to the Devil to make sure of it.

[pit-and-the-pen]

I'll Crawl Home to Her- Chapter 1

A/ N:I’m horrible at exposition so bare with me through this one. It feels a little clunky to me but this sets up a lot for the rest of the series. This is also the longest thing I’ve written outside of my senior thesis so… I have this series fully planned out and now that I’m back from vacation I should be able to work on it a lot more. 

Anyways, let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for it! 

Warnings: Spring court slander (implied trauma), nightmares. Drinking. I think that’s all but feel free to let me know if I should add anything! 

Wc- ~10k

Previous part: here

Next chapter: Here

We’re coming home. 

I ran up to my brother. Desperately pulling on Rhys’ arm and I felt him stumble back into me. He remained frozen, eyes locked on the female in front of him. Her and Rhys were clearly in the middle of a very intense conversation. But I wanted to go home. When I shouted Rhys’ name, his head flickered to me before looking back at Feyre. I saw his body tense, eyes going wide and it was instinct that had me grabbing his arm and winnowing us to Velaris.

The smell instantly calms me in a way I haven't felt in fifty years. Once my vision had fully focused, 

“She’s my mate”, nothing above a whisper. My head snapped over to him. Mate. That explained his reaction. I felt the guilt in my stomach at pulling him away from Feyre. My arms are already reaching to pull Rhys towards me into a hug. As my arms wrapped around him, he sobbed into my shoulder.

This wasn’t the Rhys I had come to know under the mountain. Sob after sob left his mouth and his precious wings dropped to the ground. I knew this was more than the reaction of a male who had his mate taken from him. This was my brother who had to watch his mate be in love with someone else after years of suffering. The cauldron had finally granted him a mate only to have her ripped away from him.

“I’m sorry” was all I could think to say. So many reasons for being sorry. Sorry for all he went through. Sorry for not being strong enough to stop it. Sorry that the female the mother had chosen for him was in love with the High Lord of Spring, and had willingly died for him. Sorry that I stole away what little time he had spent with her. 

Rhys let out another sob against my shoulder and it shook me to my core. I have heard him cry over Amarantha many times but seeing him break over Feyre was enough for me to want to march to spring and drag her to Velaris. But she wouldn’t want that. I know Rhys would have my head on a spike if I even offered. 

We both turned around at the sound of the door opening. Mor stood in silence, eyes scanning over us. Noticing our embrace. She stepped up to us and a soft smile crossed her face. 

“Tell me about your mate, Rhys.”

That was all it took for the flood gates to open. We did more than recall the details about the last few months. Rhys and I cherry picking only the most vital and important details. We kept a few things close to our chests. Those would stay our nightmares alone, Mor didn’t need to be haunted with our ghosts as well. 

Mor sat patiently before she finally interrupted. “She’s really dead?” Rhy freezed at the mention of Amarantha. I lightly placed a hand on his shoulder and answered for him. “Yes. But I don’t think this is over.” Mor just nodded sharply, looking at I both before she launched herself at both of I, arms coming up to wrap around my brother and myself. 

“If either of you ever do something that stupid again, I’ll kill you myself.” Her voice didn’t hold any malice, instead it shook with tears. My heart jumped as I left the weight of her emotions wash over me. The pain in my chest tightened as I realized how much our absence has truly shaken our family. I knew, of course, but seeing it was entirely different. 

The three of us began to settle and I finally had time to get my bearings in the house. As I let the glow of the house wrap around I. A familiar scent caught my attention, and my whole body sang. My head whipped around, looking for the source of that pine and night air, looking for Azriel.  Cas too of course but Azriel was on the front of my mind.  

Mor’s smile tilted slightly. “They should be back soon.” She sighed “They just went to the camps to check on all of them” She paused, stumbling over words  “ when we got that message from you, someone thought the most important thing was letting the camp leaders know that they had a high lord to answer to again.” This didn’t surprise me at all. Of course they would want, need, to fill in the Illyrian warriors that were now back under Rhys command with his return, Cassian having to take over that helm by nature of his position. It would be a fight, but one for a different day. 

         I wanted nothing more than to see the rest of my family and responsibilities be damned. I wanted to see them now. It had already been almost 50 years and in theory another day wouldn’t hurt but the house felt empty without the loudness of Cassian’s voice booming. It felt cold without Azriel’s shadows stirring around. 

As if Mor could sense my unease, she lightly grabbed my wrist and started pulling me deeper into the house. “I have so many books I need to show you.” That was all it took for me to laugh. Mind reeling as I tried to remember the last time I had truly laughed. 

The library was just as I had remembered it. The smell of old parchment and leather filled the space. Fires kept the room warm and light and I wanted that feeling to sink down into my bones. 

Mor gave me the space to just absorb my favorite room in the house. Rhys had given me full reign over how it was decorated. Comfy chairs that could accommodate wings and backless chairs tufted with fabric that looked like they were made of stardust were spread over the large room. The heavy wooden desk I had put in was covered in stacks of books. 

“I put all the ones I knew you would like over there.” Mor spoke up when she saw my eyes lock on the countless books. I felt my throat tighten up with tears at the thought she must have put behind the seemingly small action. It wasn’t uncommon for Mor and I to swap books as we finished them. Mostly so we could sit and talk about them for hours together. Mor and I spent many nights on the couches I had put in, falling asleep with our respective books still clutched in our hands. 

Looking at the stacks, a rough count told me there had to be over a hundred books, easily. 

“Looks like I have some serious reading to do.” I laughed. She beamed a smile at me. 

“Those are just the ones I knew you would like,” She walked over to one of the bookcases in front of the desk. “These are all the others that I need you to read so I can scream about them.”

Three whole shelves in total. It would take me gods know how long to get through them. I voiced that much. Mor waved me off. 

“You have all the time in the world to read them. It doesn’t have to happen all at once, but I’m not letting anything happen to you again. You’ll have time to read them all.” Her voice was uncharacteristically soft. I turned to look at her and I saw the pink speckling her cheeks and right above her lips, the tell-tale signs that she was trying not to cry. I placed the book I had just picked up and threw my arms around her, squeezing her as tight as I possibly could. She nuzzled her head against my shoulder and all I could do was try to hold her tighter. 

By the time we pulled away from the hug, we were both a crying, giggling mess. I forgot how much I loved spending time with Mor. Regardless of how much I cared for my brothers, Mor and I were two sides of the same coin. Plus the boys wouldn’t sit and discuss the pure filth that tended to grace the pages of the books I devoured. 

“So, what one should I start with?” 

She all but squealed as she started flipping through the piles with me. We organized as we went. Placing them in piles of order that I should read them in. A few of the series I had been following had new installments that would most likely require a reread so those got placed on the back burner for the, now older, favorites she was dying to talk about. From there we were able to pick out one of her more recent favorites that had me itching to crack open immediately. She picked out one from her own pile across the room and the both of us settled into silence, the only sound was the fireplace cracking and pages turning. 

I don’t know how late it was when Rhys softly opened the door to sneak into the room. My eyes were starting to get dry from how little I was blinking, desperate to get through one more chapter before I called it a night. Something I had voiced to Mor about ten chapters ago. Mor who now was asleep on her own couch, her hair pooling over the edge almost touching the floor from the uncomfortable angel her head had fallen into. 

“The books will still be here after you’ve gotten some sleep,” Rhys said in a gentle mocking tone. Mor stirred slightly at his voice but remained sleeping. “Come on, I’d be an awful High Lord, and an even worse brother, if I let you fall asleep in the library on your first night home.” I nodded at his words. Truthfully, I couldn’t care less where I slept but for some reason, I could tell it mattered to Rhys. It would honestly be more normal for me to fall asleep anywhere but my room. Whether it be in the library or the large sectional in the living room or the comfy chairs on the rooftop, I rarely ever slept in my own bed. Rhys had ensured that every surface of the house was as comfortable as possible to account for this but I didn’t push or argue with him as I untucked my legs from underneath me and stood up. I debated leaving Mor to sleep but didn’t want her to wake up all alone. Reaching out a hand, I placed it on her shoulder and gave her a small shake. She groaned but opened her eyes anyway. 

“We’re being banished to our rooms.” I joked and pointed over the Rhys. She let out an even louder groan. 

“Overprotective bat.” Even Rhys laughed at her words. 

“Come on, before he carries us himself.” I held out a hand and I could see Mor contemplating just rolling back over and going back to sleep but she grabbed my hand. Pulling slightly, I helped her to her feet and she rolled her neck slowly. No doubt trying to work out whatever kink was starting to develop due to half of her head hanging off the thin couch. The three of us walked down the hallway to our rooms. Sleepily stumbling to doors. We reached Mor’s first and before she slipped in, she gave me another tiny hug and another to Rhys. 

“I love you guys,” Sleep was evident in the way she almost drunkenly stumbled over her words. I returned the sentiment and she was slipping into her bedroom, the door clicking shut behind her. 

Rhys and I stood outside her bedroom for a little longer, until we saw the light from under the door flicker out. Eventually, we continued walking until we got to my door. There was a slight pause as I turned the handle. Rhys and I would normally be curled up in my bed under the mountain by now. I vaguely thought about asking him to stay the night. Not that I think either of us were truly going to be able to sleep. As tired as I felt, I was afraid that if I closed my eyes for too long I was going to wake up and this was all going  to be a cruel dream.    

Rhys seemed to pick up on my hesitancy. “I can walk in with you. If you’re…”:

“Please.” I interrupted him. He gave me a soft smile and gestured for me to open the door. 

Nothing was out of place. The room smelt like my favorite perfume and when I looked around, there was no dust to be found. Someone had spent the time still cleaning the room while I was gone. I don’t know why that touched me as much as it did but as I looked around I felt all the unshed tears finally starting to take its toll. A sob ripped its way from my chest and Rhys’ arms were around me in an instant. 

He shushed me softly, rocking me slightly. “We made it. We’re free. We’re back home.” He repeated over and over until I had cried myself out. I pulled out of his embrace and wiped away the stray tears. Shaking my head at my outburst I muttered a thank you to my brother. 

“Try to get some sleep. I’ll be just across the hall if you need anything,” He says, placing a hand on my shoulder. I nodded and he gave me a sad smile as he walked out of the room. 

I wandered over to my dresser, fished around until I pulled out the first pair of pajamas I came across. I hastily pulled my clothes off and as I went to pull the nightgown over my head, I realized the layer of grim that was clinging to my skin. A bath was definitely needed before I climbed into my warm bed.        

The tub was already full and scalding hot by the time I had finished pouring in an obscene amount of oils and bath salts. Sinking in, I sighed out in relief as the heat enveloped me. Muscles in my neck and back released as I leaned my head against the edge of the tub. I picked up the sponge on the edge and started to wash myself off. After countless minutes of scrubbing, despite my raw skin I still didn’t feel clean. Huffing, I threw the sponge across the bathroom and pulled my knees up to my chest. I just sat curled up around myself until the water started to cool down. And it was still another handful of minutes before I could manage to pull myself upright and step out of the bath. I shivered at the temperature difference. Hugging my towel closer to my body, I quickly ran bacon into my room and threw the nightgown over my head. I burrowed underneath my comforter and tried to close my eyes. 

I tossed and turned until I started pleading with the mother, the cauldron, anyone that would listen to let me go to sleep. I was bone tired but everytime I closed my eyes something made me snap them open a few moments later. Every creek of the house had my ears prickling. Has the house always been this loud? I wondered how I never noticed it before. How I ever slept with all the noise. It was then I remembered that, if my room truly haven't been messed with since I had left, that I still had a sleeping tonic from when I had cracked a few ribs. Fae healing or not, ribs always were a pain to heal. Majda had given me a tonic to make me sleep so I could actually heal without Cassian making me laugh them out of place. I flung myself out of bed and padded over to my vanity. The small bottle of purple liquid still sat , half drank/ Uncorking it, I prayed that sleeping potions didn’t go bad and took a tentative sip. Fighting back a gag at the foul taste, I put the cork back on the top and walked back to my bed. The medicine had its desired effect. Not a minute later I felt my eyelids flutter close and  this time they stayed closed until I could sense the sun high in the air signaling the next day had come. 

Knocking on my door made me finally crawl out of bed. Goraning at having to leave the warmth, I flung open the door and was staring a slightly startled Rhys in the face. He held a small tray in front of him, stacked high with various foods. 

“I didn’t want to wake you up. You slept through breakfast and lunch and I  didn’t know what you would want so I brought a little of everything.” He spoke the words so fast that in my half awake state I struggled to keep up with them. I gestured for him to come in so he could place the tray on my bed. 

“Have you eaten?” I raised an eyebrow at him as I picked up a large strawberry.. His look told me that he had, in fact, not eaten. I pointed to my bed. “Sit and eat.” I barked, mouth full of strawberries. He laughed at some silent joke and picked up a piece of toast covered in some fruit jam. We were quiet as we ate, picking apart the platter he had brought in. Truly too much for one person to eat. Once we were both full, I wiped off my hands on my comforter and finished swallowing my last bite before I asked Rhys. “What do you have on the agenda for today?” He stilled and picked at a piece of lint on his sweater. 

“Not a lot. I’m trying to organize a meeting with the High Lords of the other courts to just debrief after everything.” He shrugged like that wasn’t going to be the hardest meeting to organize. “There are some young high lords and with all the aftermath of this…We just need to all talk this out.” I nodded along with him. The courts would need some time to bounce back after this but from the way things had seemed under the mountain, we didn’t have that time. As much as I prayed to be wrong about this, war was on the horizon and we would need to have the courts functioning as much as possible if we were going to stand a chance against Hyberns forces. Amarantha was just a taste of the power that he had, an experiment of sorts. 

Mor knocked on the open door before she walked in and plopped down next to Rhys. She took note of our stern faces but didn’t say anything. Instead, she swiped one of the sandwiches off of the tray and shoved half of it in her mouth in one bite. “You, me, library.” Was all she said before she turned on her heel and walked out of the room. 

“Well I know what you’re doing for the rest of the day.” Rhys laughed as I started to scramble to get dressed. I was about to start changing when I noticed he hadn't moved from his perch on my bed. “Get out!” I scratched at him and all but pushed him out of the door, slamming it shut behind him. His laugh echoed off the empty halls outside my door. 

In record time, I was running down the halls to the library. Mor was already sitting, her book curled against her chest. She didn’t look up from  her book as she pointed to the one I had abandoned last night. “Butt in chair, book in hand.” She said and I laughed at her tone. I walked over to my couch and picked up the book,  the spine slightly cracked from laying face down most of the day. 

I must have finally gotten to the juicy part of the book because I felt Mor Peering over the edge of her own book. My poker face was completely gone as I sunk in every word. “No. Absolutely not!” I screamed, rereading the last few pages to make sure I was seeing it correctly. 

“Did you finally get to..” I held up my hand to shush her. She laughed and threw one of the throw pillows at my head. I only put my book down long enough to catch the pillow, using it to now prop up my arms. Once I had confirmed I had not actually gone crazy, Mor and I started discussing the plot twist that had been the source of my outburst. She accidentally let a detail slip that had me scrambling back for the book, desperate to catch up to the point she had been talking about. This went on for hours until I saw her perk up. She turned to face me.

.

“They’re back.” Was all Mor said, still flipping through the book perched on her knees. I didn’t say anything else before I put my own book to the side and all but ran from the room. Her laugh bouncing off the walls behind me. 

I could smell him before I saw him. That deep cedar and cold rain smell that I could wrap myself in. Rhys tried to say something to him but stopped when he realized he no longer held his audience's full attention. Azriel’s shadows ripping across the room and curling around my feet like a small cat. I could have purred at the feeling, tears started to peek along the corners of my eyes at the familiar feeling. 

When I felt movement next to me, I felt momentary disappointment at the fact that Azriel was not standing in front of me. Strong arms wrapped around my middle and started to swing me in a circle, I felt joy so strong it almost hurt. Cassian sat me back down on my feet and when he went to speak, I wrapped my arms around him in return. We stood embracing each other, slowly rocking from foot to foot. 

“Missed you, Princess.” He muttered into my head. I just nodded, my cheek too squished against his chest to say anything. “I think Mor was going to kill us if she had to be the only girl living in the house. Amren can only handle so much damage control and the coward spent most nights at her apartment.” He nudged my shoulder as he spoke, pulling a laugh from me. It felt good to laugh again. My cheeks hurt in the perfect way at the smile that stretched over my face. 

A throat being cleared from across the room pulled my attention from Cassian. I could have melted into a puddle right then and there. Azriel stood in front of me, a true smile gracing his face. I squealed and rushed over into his arms. He didn’t swing me around like Cassian did, but he held me just as tight. It would have felt so right to crash my lips against his and he released me from his arms, but that wasn’t my relationship with Azriel. Those thoughts were nothing more than what I needed to make it through the events of the last fifty years. Azriel looked at me like I was a sister, nothing more. Rhys’ little sister on top of that. His high lord's little sister. He was the one who had coined my nickname centuries ago. When the trio first formed their own little band of brothers. I had gotten pulled in by proximity, Azriel said it one day and it had stuck ever since. “Hi Princess.” He said, tone polite but I could hear the joy behind them. I tried not to blush as I heard his voice. Shaking the things I had imagined that voice saying to me out of my head out, I mustered up a pathetic, “Hi, Az.” 

It had never felt this awkward around him. Cursing myself mentally for thinking of all the things I would say to him when I finally saw him again. None of those words made their way out of me as the two of us stared at each other. “I’m glad you’re home.” Was all he said his words short but I felt the sincerity leaking from them. Biting down the flutter in my heart,  I gave a short nod and wrapped my arms around myself. His eyes tracked the movement but didn’t say anything. 

Cass clapped a hand on his brother's shoulder, breaking the tension that I felt take over the room. “We’ll see you at training tomorrow,” I raised an eyebrow to him. “Don’t give me that look, I’m guessing you didn’t have time to… while you were gone. I can’t have my sister not able to defend herself. We would be the laughing stock of Pyrthian.” He smiled as I made a big show of rolling my eyes . 

So I joined them for training the next morning. And the next. Cassian slowly ran through the basics until I was nothing more than a mile of sore bones and sweat by the end of our sessions. I would shower and hang out with Mor. Rhys was suddenly very busy as he tried to catch up on all the events he missed in his court over the last fifty years. He made more and more trips to Hewn City, leaving Mor free to run around with me. Before I knew it a month had passed and all of us were sitting around the table for one of our family dinners. 

Jokes were flung around the table and no one noticed  the way Rhys and I sat back, sinking it all in. More than once I caught his eyes from across the table and all we could do was smile at each other. Is it bad to say that I missed this? I spoke into his head as Mor and Cassian had started raising their voices at each other, getting into a slight argument over some random events of the day. I did too. Even when we both flinched at the volume Cassian’s voice had risen too. Even Azriel had started to chime in before Mor shot him down with a withering look. I laughed despite myself at his expression. I shut up when that look was turned to me. 

The conversation fell into a natural lull and everyone was happily eating. Rhys hissed at something, shaking his arm that bore the bargain mark. Something must have prickled down the weird connection. 

“I still can’t believe you let her go with Tamlin.” Cassian said, stabbing something on his plate with a little more force than necessary. Rhys bared his teeth at his brother. 

“I didn't have much of a choice, now did I?” He slumped back into his chair, still rubbing his hand. “She already hated me because of this stupid bargain but if I had stolen away from the male she was willing to die for…”

“But Rhys. It’s Tamlin. No one would have slighted you, not after…” Cassian’s gaze flickered to me. As hard as I was trying to tune out the conversation, I still felt my chest tighten at their words. Rhys would have never taken Feyre without her permission, well at least outside of the bargain but we both knew that was simply a means to an end. Regardless of how much it must hurt to have another person he cared about over in spring, Rhys wouldn’t take that choice away from her, no matter how concerned he might be for  her safety. 

“How  was it seeing the brute again?” Amren asked and the table silenced. I froze and kept my gaze locked down at my plate. Suddenly losing my appetite completely.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” I itched at my wrist, tugging at the fabric that felt too tight around my wrist. Azriel placed a comforting hand over mine. I flashed him a thankful smile.

“You haven’t wanted to talk about it for over a century.” She prodded. 

“And she shouldn’t have to if she doesn’t want to,” She took a breath like she was about to press the issue. “Why does it matter to you anyways?” Azriel hissed at her. Amren had the decency to take a hint and held up her hands in surrender, a smirk plastered on her face. 

We all sat in silence for the rest of dinner. Even Cassian knew better than to make any comments due to the tension in the air. Everytime he would go to say something, Rhys would shoot daggers at him. Eventually I got sick of it and threw my napkin down. 

“Fine. You want to know what it felt like?” I shouted at Amren. Everyone flinched. “I am terrified for that girl. Because I know what loving Tamlin does to someone. Seeing him felt just like you whenever someone mentions the prison.” She paled at my words and I didn’t spare her another look as I pushed away from the table, storming out. I know I would regret my words later but sometimes Amren needed a taste of her own medicine. She just loved to push everyone buttons because we were all too scared to really piss her off. 

I flung myself into my bed, still fully dressed. I groaned into my pillow. Apologies could wait until tomorrow. A knock from the door had me fighting back swears. Stomping over to the door, I ripped it open and a very startled Rhys was standing in the hallway, hand raised like he was about to knock again. 

“I wanted to check on you.” The high lord said.

“I’m fine” I gritted out and he raised an eyebrow at me. I let out a heavy sigh. 

“I know I shouldn’t have taken the bait but I don’t want to talk about him, right now or ever, if I can avoid it.” Rhys’ eyes held sympathy and he just contuined standing in the hallway, letting me rant. “I mean it’s been so long. I didn’t want to talk about it then. No one’s asking how you feel about Tamlin.” I paused and Rhys just shrugged. 

“If she’s happy with him, then it’s not my place to try to save her. If she wants to come here, then I’ll happily let her do that too.” 

I stared at him like he had gone crazy. “What about the bargain?” He shrugged again

“It was necessary at the time. I don’t actually plan on cashing in on it. She’d only hate me. More.” I could feel his despair. The self loathing held behind those words. 

“Rhys.” He shook his head.

“I’ll never take away her choice in this. Just because she’s my mate doesn’t mean I have a claim to her. Regardless of every nerve in my body screaming otherwise. It’s her life. She’s given more than enough to deserve whatever, whoever, makes her happy.” I went to hug him and he stepped out of my reach. “As much as I appreciate it, I don’t need your sympathy for making the right decision.” He tried to play it off as a joke but I knew he truly meant it. 

“Well if you ever want to talk about it…”

“Like how you want to talk about Tamlin.” He cut me off. My mouth set into a thin line and I took that as a dismissal of the conversation. Fine. I just wanted to crawl into bed anyway. 

“Well now that we’ve established that. Anything else you want to say, oh mighty High Lord.” 

“No.” 

“Good. Good night.” I said and swiftly shut the door in his face. I love my brother but he really knows how to get under my skin sometimes. I know deep down I’m mad because he called me out. I can’t expect him to pour his heart out to me when I won’t do the same thing. 

I threw the covered back and crawled in, still fully dressed. Mind reeling. I wouldn’t even know where to start with talking to anyone about Tamlin. And what good would it do? All of that was in the past and talking about it would only piss everyone off all over again. We had just barely avoided attacking the spring court when I came home. I don’t want to drag Feyre into this now that she’s there. 

I managed to finally fall asleep, tossing and turning. Dreams filled with deep swirling greens and the sound of growls. 

When I woke up in the morning I could tell it was later than normal. The sun is slightly higher in the air. Snapping out of my sleepy haze I cursed as I jumped out of bed. I was late for training and Cassian wasn’t going to let me forget that. 

Throwing on my clothes, mentally screaming at all the buckles on my training leathers. I knew not eating was going to come back to bite me in the ass but I simply didn’t have time as I sprinted through the house. In my haste, I passed a grinning Rhys. The events from last night seemingly forgiven as he taunted me. 

“Maybe he’ll consider this your warm up today.” I held up a crude gesture and he only laughed harder.  

I made it to the training rink in record time. My hands were on my knees as I panted. The stitch in my side was already screaming at me but I forced myself to stand up straight as Cassian sauntered over to me. The split in his lip told me Him and Azriel had gotten started without me. 

“You’re late, princess.” I flinched at his tone. He surveyed me. “I think double drills should be enough to make sure that doesn’t happen again. I cursed, I couldn’t get through the routine once without limping back to the house. Two would kill me and he knew it. 

“What are you waiting for? An invitation?” He held out his hand “Consider this it.” He stepped away from me, going back over to Azriel. I know Cassian wasn’t actually mad at me. He also knew that if he went easy on me, I wouldn’t take training seriously. I appreciated the routine of it all and I really did need it. So sighing I got started. 

I was halfway through my second set when Cas called me over. 

“Lesson learned?” He simply asked. I nodded. Still trying to take in breath. My muscles are screaming at me for still being vertical. 

“Good because Cas and I decided it’s finally time to step this up a notch. You’re almost the same as you were before. Now it’s time to get your powers involved. Relearn how to fight with those.” Azriel spoke. My stomach sank. This was something I hadn't considered. It was a stupid oversight on my part and I didn’t know how to get myself out of this so I responded with the truth. 

“I don’t have my powers.” 

“Okay, nice joke” Cassian cut in.

“I’m not joking. I can’t use them anymore.”

“What do you mean you can’t?” 

“I can’t use my powers” I grumble. “They’re still in there but it’s like I’m fighting against a wall.” Azriel raised an eyebrow at that revelation. 

“How do you know?” 

“I don’t know but all I know is I tried to use them… you know… And they wouldn’t come. Everyone had theirs back so I know it wasn’t the curse. So for whatever reason I couldn’t make them work.” It was embarrassing to admit. My powers had been the only truly useful thing I could rely on in the training ring. 

“Have you tried since then?” I nodded. Not so much of a glimmer of them since I came home. I told Cassian that much and he swore under his breath. 

“We could always take you to see Helion.” I shook my head at his words. 

“I don’t want to burden him with more problems. He has enough to do in his own court. I’ll figure it out, but for now I’ll just have to fight the old fashioned way.” 

Neither of the males in front of me seemed to be happy with my response but Cassian jumped right back in.

“Fine. But that means that you have a lot more training to do. If you had your powers you would be fine. But in just plain hand to hand combat, you’d get your ass kicked by anyone with any skill.” 

I glared at him but I knew he was telling the truth. Grabbing his arm, I pulled him into the center of the ring and tossed him one of the training swords. Heavy but they wouldn’t do nearly as much damage when he hit me. 

“Do your worst then.” Was all I said before he charged at me. 

“You’re sloppy.” Cassian barked as he knocked the sword out of hand again, again. I held my wrist as it twisted at a weird angel. My cheeks heated with anger and I went to wipe the sweat that had formed on my brow with my other, only to find it just as damp. I recoiled in disgust and Cassian laughed again. 

“You try getting your shit kicked in for fifty years and see how you bounce back.” I spoke and I saw his face pale. Shit. “Joking Cas, it’s okay.” 

I shook my head. “I am sloppy. And that’s why I’m still training with your annoying ass. You’ll have me back in tip top shape.” He relaxed slightly, but his shoulders still wouldn’t lower. 

I sighed and did the only thing I could think of as he turned away from me. I jumped onto his back, being mindful of his wings and pulled him down to the ground. The air left his lungs in a whoosh as I took us both onto our sides, I quickly bounded to my feet, ignoring the sting in my side from the impact. 

“Come on you big Illyrian baby.” I raised my arms slightly in front of me and a flicker of something crossed Cassian's face and I saw him make the decision to play along. To pretend that this was just a normal day of training. He leapt to his feet with a surprising amount of grace. 

“If you want a fight, you got it princess” He said with a smirk. We both stood in the middle of the training ring, circling each other, waiting  for the other to make the first move. Swords forgotten off to the side. I saw the slight twitch of his left side and I made the choice to ignore the fake out, and went to block my right side. It was the right choice, the blow aimed toward my right side bounded off my forearm, it still stung but at least it didn’t put me on my ass like it would have had it made contact. I grabbed his wrist and twisted his arm back, pulling him closer towards me and pushing on his back. He only stumbled for a second before he regained his footing. That kick had put me off balance more than I anticipated and it was easy for Cassian to grab the leg that lowered too slowly, grabbing my ankle and yanking me to my stomach. I yelped at the contact. He laughed loudly as I held my hand up in surrender. I rolled over onto my back with a groan. 

“Give me a few days back in training and I’ll have you on your ass, General.” He laughed even harder.

“In case you forgot, princess, you could barely do that even on your best days. Give yourself more time.” 

“A week.” I responded with my own laugh. Whatever I had done, it worked. Cassian’s shoulders had fully relaxed and I noticed the smile gracing his face finally reached his eyes. I noticed Azriel starting a few feet away. I sat back on my elbows, propping myself up. “Want a round, Az?” I teased and was rewarded by him rolling those big hazel eyes. 

“I think you’ve hurt yourself enough for today.” Was all he said before he turned to stalk away  from the ring. I laid back down in the dirt of the ring at his retreating figure, sighing heavily. Cas comes to stand over me, offering me a hand up. I grab it, pulling myself up. 

“Give him some more time to come around. This was harder for him than the rest of us.” He was suddenly serious. “He’ll get there, but you know him. Broody as they come.” He nudged me with his wing and I couldn’t help but chuckle at the gesture. I nodded in understanding and the pair of us walked back up to the house. 

This was harder for him than the rest of us. The words bounced around my head for the rest of the day. It makes sense. Azriel would have seen this as him failing. Not only failing me but his High Lord. Regardless of how hard everyone must have tried to comfort him, he would always blame himself, and only himself, for Rhys and I going under the mountain.  

It also explained why Azriel seemed to be avoiding me. Besides that first awkward meeting, he always managed to find an excuse to not be in the same room as me if he could avoid it. I’ve been home for almost a month now and I had hardly seen him. The few times I ran into him in the hall, he would quickly and politely brush me. Not saying anymore than a few words in greeting or response to a question I might have asked him. Be patient. I could do that. But it was hard to ignore the sting in my chest every time he brushed me off. We were practically joined at the hip before I left. I fit seamlessly into the fold of the trio but now Azriel felt like a stranger again. 

My mind was too full of thoughts to begin to try to settle down, so after I bathed the dirt and sweat off, I changed into a loose nightgown that almost went to the ground and padded off for the library. When I got to the door, it was slightly cracked, light from the fireplace filling even the hallway with its warmth. It was like the room itself was calling to me and as I stepped in. Above the crackle of the fire, I made out the sound of pages turning, of fabric rustling as someone shifted on one of the couches in the room. I searched for the source of the sound and found none other than Azriel lounging with a book propped open on his lap. He didn’t seem to notice me until one of his shadows snuck off his lap and slithered over to my feet, wrapping around them like they always did. 

He closed his book and glanced over to where I stood in the doorway. Something flashed across his eyes that I couldn’t decipher before it faded away. He cleared his throat and said a generic greeting. My heart sank as I saw him mark the page he was on in his book, and place it on the end table to his right. I tried not to pout as I said. “Don’t leave on my account.” I said, keeping my tone light to hide the oily feeling pooling in my stomach. The shadow at my feet seemed to curl in tighter to me as Azriel went to stand. 

“I was just finishing up anyways.” He couldn’t seem to meet my eyes. “The rooms all yours.” 

“Azriel…” I don’t know what I was going to stay. Maybe beg him to stay with me, maybe start shouting at him but I know none of that would help, would only make both of us feel worse. Be patient with him. So I bit back all the words I wanted to say to him and simply said. “Good night.” He called to me as he headed out of the room, his shoulder just barely brushing mine as he passed by me. The room suddenly felt too cold so I willed the house to put the fire out and walked out, heading back to my own room suddenly feeling very tired. 

I crawled under my covers and tried to push the thought of Azriel’s eyes out of my mind as I drifted off into a fitful sleep. 

 I sensed it. I was back under the mountain. Nonono. This can’t be happening but I saw it all out in front of me. Rhys was in front of me, standing on the dais with Amarantha standing next to him. I almost broke down, knees buckling, when I saw that all-too-familiar mask of indifference grace my brother's face. I tried to call out but my voice wouldn’t come out, feet locked in place as I stood and helplessly watched as the red haired female reached a finger under Rhys chin. Bile raised in my throat as I saw her whisper something to him, something I couldn’t make out. When I tried to reach out for his mind, I was met with nothing more than those iron thick walls he built up. Amarantha’s eyes locked on mine and it was like she set me on fire. My skin burned, the string of her breaking my bones, of the attors smacking me down everytime I said something out of place. Finally I seemed to find my voice, but only a scream ripped from my throat at the phantom pain. Her red lips curled into a cold smile. “Welcome back pet.” another scream made its way from my throat. 

I flung myself into a sitting position, jolting awake from the nightmare. My lungs ached as I gulped down air. My skin still burned and I threw off my blanket, pulling my knees to my chest. I almost screamed again as I realized the presence of something, someone, in my room. 

Azriel’s soft voice said my name. “I heard you scream, I thought…” My eyes finally adjusted and I could make out his frame. “I’m sorry. I'll go.” 

“No.” I rasped, throat raw. I must have actually been screaming. That explains his presence in my room, kind of. My hand went up to my neck attempting to rub away the pain in my chest. The pain didn't stop the request that bubbled over my lips. “Please. Stay.” I saw him go still, turning back around to me. Even in the dark, I was able to find his eyes, wide open as they locked on mine. Tears welled up in my eyes and I tried not to sniffle. 

He whispered my name again. “Just go back to sleep.” He was starting to turn around again. My body reacted faster than my mind, I reached over the large bed, reached for his arm. “Please.” It was all I could get out. Please stay. Please talk to me. Please can we pretend that all of this didn’t happen and please be my best friend again. So many things tied into that one word. It’s almost like he sensed it and he sighed, relaxing into my touch. 

“Only until you fall back asleep.” He sounded exhausted and his tone made me feel heavy all over again. He still shuffled in behind me. I tried not to think about the fact that when I went to tuck myself into his chest that I was met with bare skin. Resisted the urge to trail my hand down along those perfect abs, to the deep vee that I knew laid beneath them. I just buried myself deeper into his side and I felt his wings wrap around me, shielding me from the world around us as I drifted back to sleep. The smell of cedar lulling me into a dreamless sleep. 

I woke up feeling more rested than I had since I’ve been back home. I knew he wouldn’t still be here but my hand still reached out to the side of the bed he’d been in, still warm. He had stayed. That explains why I slept so well. His scent lingered in the room and not caring how desperate it might have seemed, I buried my face into the pillow he had been laying on. I let his scent surround me and calm me down. A knock on the door had me groaning but sitting up anyways. 

‘You didn’t come to breakfast so I wanted to check on you…” More said as she opened the door, she looked around as she spoke and her face fell slightly before continuing. “I had Nuala make you a tray in case you were hungry when you woke up.” She held a small wooden tray in her hand and I beamed at her, touched by the small gesture from my cousin. 

“Thank you.” Was all I could get out, tears threatening to fall at the kindness in her action. 

“I heard you last night.” She spoke quietly as she walked to the edge of my bed, sitting down at my feet. “I know I wasn’t there, but if you ever need to talk, or just someone to listen to. I’ll always be here.”

“You don’t need that stuff in your head too. It’s bad enough it's mine.” 

She said my name in a concerned tone and I waved her off. “Don’t we have some books you need me to finish?” I said, deflect. She sighed sensing she wouldn’t win this one.

“Maybe we should take a break from the library today.” My face dropped as I thought of what I could possibly do with my day if it wasn’t reading with Mor. “I need to go shopping for some stuff, start looking around for Solstice presents and I haven't had a proper shopping buddy…” She trailed off, giving me a full megawatt smile. 

“Alright let's go, before you start batting your eyelashes at me.” I playfully rutted her in the ribs and she threw her arm over my shoulder.

I haven't gone out to the shops in Velaris since I’d been back home. A part of me had forgotten how beautiful my home truly was. I tried not to stare in awe at the new vendors, the smell of food lingering in the air. People walked to and fro, running errands for the day. Mor and I had found one of my favorite dress shops and all but pulled me into the shop. 

The designer was known for her slightly scandalous fashion. Floor length gowns with cut outs that left little to the imagination but were still heartbreakingly gorgeous. By the time Mor and I left, our arms were full of bags and I still had a few more dresses to pick up that needed to be altered. 

We flitted in and out of more stores until the sun was starting to sink behind the horizon. When I noticed where we were I almost suggested we stopped by Rita’s but my shoulders were starting to hurt from the weight of the bags and Mor wouldn’t be able to winnow us into the house if we did have a few drinks nor did I even want to think of carrying them back. 

So when we finally checked out from the last store, Mor having purchased a honestly hideous printed shirt for Cassian, we joined arms and started the walk back to the townhouse. 

After dropping off all of my new things in my room, I knew I had to go apologize to Rhys. Armen could wait, if I ever bothered to say sorry to her. She wouldn’t hold it against me either way. Our relationship was more antagonist than anything else anyways. So I put the clothes into my closet and padded off to find Rhys.

Eventually I found him in his study. He didn’t look up as I closed the door behind me. I called his name. Still nothing. So I walked over to his desk. I noticed he was clutching a letter in his hand, holding it so tightly that it was starting to crinkle. I went beside him and soothed the letter out of his hand. My face paled as I read carefully over the words.

Feyre was marrying Tamlin. 

The letter wasn’t an invitation. Just a simple announcement that would be extended to all high lords when one of them married. I dropped the piece of paper like it had burned me. I grasped for the right words to say to my brother, but when he looked up at me they all faded away. Agony I had never quite seen in them before knocked the breath from my lungs. 

“I know I have no reason to be upset. I should just be happy that she’s  happy. But I can’t find it in me.” He stared at the tattoo on his hand. “I’ll never see her again. Not after she marries him. I might get glimpses at balls but I’ll never really be able to see her.” Never be able to see her because we both know how Tamlin treats the people he loves. The gilded cage Feyre will be locked in the moment she says “I do”. I gave myself a moment to mourn for the girl. But I know there was nothing either of us could do in this situation. So I did the only thing I could think of. I strolled over to the bar cart in the corner of the room and poured both of us a few fingers of whiskey. He eyed it carefully as I passed him the glass. He took it out of my hands and knocked it back in one fluid motion. I did the same with mine. Holding out the glass for more, I poured him another. We just sat drinking until the familiar flush started to creep onto my face. Rhys hasn't said much, neither of us have. Content with drinking away the pit in both of our stomachs. 

“I love her.” He said after he finished his third glass. He didn’t sound. In fact this was  the most sober I think I had ever heard him

“I think I’ve loved her since I first saw her in the spring court. But I know I loved her when she offered herself in place of Tamlin. This brave human offering to save our entire world, who before that moment would have let her tear her to shreds.” He grimaced, as if the very thought disgusted him. 

“So tell her.” I said with a shrug. He glared at me. 

“You know it’s not that easy.” I did know. But I wanted him to be happy. I didn’t want him to have to sit here and drown out his sorrow while Tamlin got to play hero. Tamlin, who sat around while my brother risked his neck time and time again to save Feyre. He slumped down into his chair and laughed at the ceiling. 

“The mother can be a real bitch sometimes. I don’t know what I did to deserve all this good fortune.” His voice was bitter and truly didn’t know how to respond. I went to pour him another glass but he put a hand over his glass. 

“As much as I appreciate what you’re doing. I think I need to go to sleep before I march into the Spring Court and drag her out. Regardless of if she’ll hate me or not.”  His eyes soften as he looks at me. “You should head to bed soon too. I don’t need to look into your mind to know you’re going a million miles a minute right now.” 

He wasn’t wrong. My thoughts had been roaring around in my head since I read that letter. It wasn’t hard to put myself back into Feyre’s shoes. My heart panged for this selfless girl. How long until the cracks in the foundation started show and she would be pulled into the storm that is Tamlin. I nodded in acknowledgement of his words. Putting the cork back onto the glass bottle. I rose from my chair, rolling my stiff shoulders. Rhys and I both returned to our respective rooms. 

Hard as I tried, I couldn’t sleep. I tossed and turned but couldn’t get comfortable. I had run out of the sleeping tonic a few nights before so I just accepted that sleep wasn’t going to come. I made no move to get out of bed though. I just curled my covers tighter over me. When the sun peeked through my curtain. I didn’t get up. I didn’t go to training. I didn’t even get up from my bed until mid afternoon, just going far enough to use the bathroom. Immediately crawling back into the warmth of my bed. 

Someone had knocked on the door and I pretended to be asleep when I heard the door click open. I ignored the smell of cedar until I felt a shadow sweep across my bed, settling by my face. If it knew I was asleep, it didn’t respond to its master. But it also didn’t leave when my door softly shut. I just turned to face away from the ripple of blackness. Not wanting to deal with the comfort the small action granted me. 

When I finally left my bedroom the next day, I learned Rhys had behaved similarly yesterday. The two of us floating around the house. We were bad enough that the others cleared out of whatever room we were in. I couldn’t find it in myself to really care enough to knock it off. 

This continued for the remainder of the week leading up to the date of the wedding. I expected the same behavior as I woke up the morning of the big day. But when I walked into the kitchen, Rhys was sitting around the table with Cassian and Azriel, head thrown back in laughter. He turned his head to me as I walked in and smiled at me.

“Glad to see you’re feeling better.” I grunted at him. Walking to the fridge I pulled out a bowl of fruit and swiped a couple pieces of sliced strawberry. He hummed in response and Cassian spoke up.

“We’re going to the cabin later, if you want to come with us. We’ll need someone to help us finish all this booze.” He gestured to three large boxes that were occupying the floor of the kitchen. I raised an eyebrow to Rhys and he shook his head. Drop it. He spoke in my head. I shoved him out and when I looked back at him, he looked hurt. 

“Boys, can I speak to my brother alone?” The two looked confused but stood up from the table regardless. 

“You don’t approve?” Rhy asked plainly. I scoffed.

“They might not know what today is, but I do,” I snatched the unopened bottle from his hand. “If you want to drink yourself stupid, I won’t stop you but that doesn’t prevent all of this from happening.” He made a lunge for the bottle and I was somehow able to keep it out of his grasp. He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose between two fingers. 

“What do you want me to say? That I would rather her marry anyone else than him? That I wish I was the one that she was happy to see. That I wished she would change her mind…” He trailed off. Eyes seemingly far away.  Horror washed over his face. 

“Rhys?” I spoke softly, wondering if I pushed him too hard. 

“I have to go.” Was all he said and before I could catch him, he had winnowed away. 

I had been on edge since Rhys disappeared with no sign of where he was going to. It hasn't been more than an hour but I was about to wear a hole through the rugs in the hallway with my pacing. Suddenly, I heard Rhys in my head. Grab Mor and meet me at the big house. I didn’t respond. Just went to find Mor, she must have received a similar message because when I got to her room she was already waiting for me. She didn;t ask any questions, merely grabbing my arm and winnowing us to the house we rarely ever used. When we arrived to the house I nearly gasped as I saw why Rhys had disappeared so suddenly. I just had time to make out a satin slipper as it was chucked with deadly precision right at Rhys’ head. She had barely launched the other one at him before she stormed off up the stairs. Rhys was all but growling as he stalked over to us. “That went well.” Mor snorted at him and this time Rhys actually growled at her before stalking over to his own room. 

We didn't see or hear from Feyre for the rest of the night, the three of us eating in silence. I felt the tension rolling off of Rhys when Nuala and Cerridwen informed us that Feyre hadn't eaten the dinner they had left for her. My stomach sank and I avoided the stare from my brother. He had asked me to go check on her. Saying that I could offer her some company. I didn’t have it in me to talk to her yet. Didn’t want to make this day, this decision, about me. And I know going into that room I would see a younger version of myself I wasn’t ready to face. 

The next day, Rhys had insisted on her joining us for breakfast. She came stomping down the stairs. “I’m not a dog.” She sneered at him before taking a tentative seat at the table. 

She looked around and her eyes locked onto mine, recognition sparkling in them,

“I remember you. You were under the mountain. What are you doing here?” Her tone was surprisingly pleasant, a stark contrast from every word she had said to my brother. 

I introduced myself. “I’m his sister.” She laughed at that. 

“I’m sorry to hear that.” It was hard to bite back my comment while I looked at her. It was like looking into an old memory, the dark circle around her eyes, the way the light had completely vanished behind them. She didn’t even look like this under the mountain. Tamlin had broken her completely. I’m sorry for you. I didn’t say that though, instead just responding with a simple. 

“You get used to it.” 

“I doubt that.” She snorted and started picking at the food in front of her.

[decadeofjoy-au]

NEW HANDYMAN LORE

Angel Creek was a 28 year old who worked with heavy lifting and more exhausting tasks than most of their co-workers, due to this they were very in shape. While Angel was on the security team, they were treated more as an assistant than a security guard.

Angel has had a large history of being overprotective of those they deem either weaker than them or people they consider family and friends. During The Decade Of Joy, Angel was unfortunately out sick but returned a week later to continue their work. During this time, Angel was quickly caught and taken by Catnap before eventually being turned into Handyman.

HANDYMAN FACTS

Tw for image with blood

* Despite popular belief, Handyman cries a lot. Especially when they’re alone.

* Handyman is actually one of the few experiments allowed to leave their cell to interact with visitors and the Orphans. This is because they can’t talk very well and therefore can’t ask for help even if they wanted to.

* Most toys and experiments don’t exactly know if Handyman is so protective of those they care about because of past experiences OR if it’s because Handyman just cares that little about themself.

* The reason Handyman is constantly refered to as “they” is because the character itself was meant to be gender neutral to appeal to all genders and age groups. As for Angel themselves, not much was known about them before becoming an experiment besides their protectiveness and resilience and their gender was one of the many unknown things.

* How Handyman acts depends on those they’re around. They’ll act temperamental and stubborn around those they don’t like, sassy but tolerant to those they’re okay with and obedient and protective to those they like/care about.

* Handyman’s voice is so messed up because they were one of the first experiments that catnap had worked on and when attempting to make them sound like the real character, catnap messed up and permanently damaged their vocal cords instead.

* Handyman’s wings are made of flexible plastic, the character itself is made of a harder, more sturdy metal. Due to this, Handyman can’t jump or climb very well(also because their “feet” are actually their hands too). The experiment does have experience in running far distances, picking up heavy things and they have a very quick reaction time.

* Due to being expressionless and mostly unable to talk, Handyman can be especially temperamental and emotional when in a state of distress, whether it’s because they’re being interrogated or are in danger.

*Handyman’s “provoked” state will ONLY be triggered if they’re in an incredible amount of pain and are being provoked or see somebody they care about/tolerate being threatened or hurt. After their provoked state, Handyman can stay energized for 30 minutes afterwards before feeling exhausted.

Provoked Handyman:

[yanderes-galore]

Maybe yandere master Ahsoka in a au where she never left the Jedi order and she gets a padawon , and she sees reader as family hcs please 🙏 🌙

Sure! I'm a bit rusty with her but I hope this alternate take based on her personality is good :)

Yandere! Platonic! Master! Ahsoka with Padawan! Darling

Pairing: Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Fear of loss, Slight manipulation, Violence, Isolation, Dubious companionship.

Jedi aren't meant to be close to many people...

Companionship, relationships, any sort of close bonds are frowned upon in The Order.

Suppressing such feelings is necessary for a Jedi to serve.

Ahsoka herself has learned how to do such things.

However... That doesn't mean she doesn't feel complex emotions.

The bond between Jedi and Padawan is a close one, but less distracting than most.

Many view their Padawan's like siblings, or a kid they couldn't have.

Such a bond is similar to how Ahsoka feels with you.

She herself had a close bond with her master, Anakin... before he went to the Dark Side.

While she may not agree with The Order all of the time, she's stuck with them for many missions.

Even right up until The Order fell.

Now, as a Jedi Master, it was only natural for Ahsoka to take a student of her own.

Ahsoka has always wanted to protect people.

She defends people and has given everything to the order.

She has the spirit of a Jedi... always caring and ready to solve problems.

Then The Order deemed her worthy to train you... a young Padawan to call her own.

Ahsoka doesn't expect taking care of a Padawan to be easy.

Jedi training is taxing on the mind and body, yet upon going on a few missions, you're proving to be capable.

You remind Ahsoka of how she was when she was younger.

Now she finally understands how Anakin felt when she was acting reckless and impulsive.

It's easy for Padawans to get carried away.

She'd know such a thing as she was once overly ambitious herself.

Yet she can tell you're not only brave... but loyal too.

Ahsoka had you as her Padawan before Order 66 was executed.

She may even still keep you under her wing after Order 66, wanting to keep you safe.

Ahsoka as your master seems like she'd give off either big sister vibes or mom vibes.

Either way she'd be protective of her Padawan, fully away from the dangers that the Galaxy has to offer.

She wants to teach you to follow your heart yet stay cautious.

She's kind to you yet also isn't afraid to scold you for your mistakes.

Ahsoka may actually be a good master for you.

The one issue I'm seeing?

Her fear.

Fear can poison a Jedi and their motives.

In fact, fear... love... and anger can poison a Jedi.

This is the reason Jedi aren't allowed to have personal connections.

Having a family, a relationship, or even children can be distractions.

If a Jedi can not control their emotions, they become vulnerable to the Dark Side.

Ahsoka's issue towards you would be the fear of losing you.

Especially after Order 66 in this AU.

She's lost many close to her, an unfortunate part of being a Jedi.

She's even lost her own master.

So, really, you'd be all she has as a Jedi master.

You're her student... the family she could never have....

Teaching you becomes increasingly hard due to these feelings.

Each time she sees you do something risky, she tries to be optimistic.

Yet she can't help but think of you getting hurt.

She wonders if The Order chose right...

She wonders... if she really is the right teacher for you.

But then you look at her with eager eyes.

It's such a familiar sight.

When she sees you so bright and determined, despite it all, she smiles.

Yes... Yes they must've chosen right.

They put you in her care.

So... She should take care of you the best she can.

No matter what.

I imagine this AU would also take place after Order 66.

During it, Ahsoka kept you close and defended you against every rogue clone she could.

She isn't sure what she'd do without her Padawan.

She definitely sees you as family, treating you protectively and always observing any who come close.

She is moralistic... but as she learned from Anakin...

Sometimes you have to bend the rules to do the right thing.

Killing people often happens as a Jedi, like it or not.

Ahsoka takes no joy in it... yet she'd do anything to protect you.

Speaking of which, after Order 66 she'd take you with her into hiding.

She can't really teach you when in hiding... as using the Force would get you both detected.

Ahsoka, as your master, would give you both a fake name to hide from the growing Empire.

After Order 66, Ahsoka views you even more as family.

Since she can't teach you to be a Jedi, you two really do end up adopting a familial role.

Be that siblings or mother and child... Ahsoka hates to admit it but she's attached.

She knows such a bond may poison her... yet The Order is no more.

You two may be Jedi at heart, yet nothing is stopping you from having personal connections now.

Ahsoka's biggest fear is losing you.

Be that by death or the Dark Side... both are just as bad.

Such thoughts are what make it hard for Ahsoka to let you mature.

At some points she coddles you, especially when you have to pretend to not be Jedi.

She's worried about letting you out into the world.

It's just... too dangerous right now.

One mistake and you could be hunted.

The thought makes Ahsoka worry more than she should.

In fact, it makes her isolate you.

Naturally you believe her subtle manipulation when she asks you to stay.

You trust her, you know she wouldn't let anyone harm you...

So, if pretending to be farmers is what you have to do, you'll do it.

Ahsoka cherishes the trust you hold for her.

Which is why she feels bad when she abuses it.

Ahsoka is mostly just... protective.

She wants a life where she'll always have you, and a quiet one away from the Empire happens to be on her mind.

Although, eventually, you'll want to leave her side.

Padawans naturally have to leave their masters at some point.

They deserve to be independent... and Ahsoka knows that...

But things have changed.

When you tell Ahsoka you wish to leave, to make a life of your own... she hesitates.

N-No... No, you really shouldn't.

She hates to say it, really does... but it isn't safe.

What if you get caught?

What if the Empire executes you after realizing you're a Jedi or... Force sensitive at the very least.

Or... what if they choose to use you as a weapon against her?

Ahsoka would try to convince you into staying with her.

All you need is each other... you've been through so much already...

Why don't you sit back and stay with her?

You can have a quiet life!

She understands you crave action... that you want to join the Rebellion...

She was once a similar way in her youth.

Yet, she may even Jedi mind trick you in an attempt to keep you safe.

Ahsoka keeps telling herself she's just... bending the rules.

What she's doing isn't wrong.

Keeping you in hiding at a farm isn't wrong.

Convincing forcing you to stay isn't wrong, either....

She's protecting you.

Cutting someone who knows your secrets down isn't bad either.

They were a threat to you

Tricking you is... underhanded but...

You need her.

Ahsoka looks after you because you're all she has now.

Many of her friends are gone, her master is gone, The Order is gone...

It's just you and her... alone in a galaxy that wants you dead...

However, Ahsoka will always protect you no matter the cost, you're all she has and she plans to keep you all to herself... under her protection... safe and sound.

[gatorbites-imagines]

Padwan anakin x more dark side leaning reader?

Padawan Anakin Skywalker x dark side leaning male reader

Headcanons

Featuring my boy Jon Antilles, give it up for Jon Antilles everybody.

You had both been younglings with the jedi, and later Padawans. You had been older than Anakin by the time he joined the order, meaning you were just at the cusp of getting sent off to the other corpse if you didn’t get picked as a padawan.

You had never fit in much with the Jedi. You were too emotional, too quick to anger, and your grudges knew no ends. You still had a chip on your shoulder because Yoda decided to tease you when you were very small, if that said anything about your ability to hold grudges.

You were the child of two slaves, who had served under the worst of the worst. This meant you had been surrounded by darkness and hate since you started growing in your parents’ womb. You had overheard many of the older jedi wonder if that was the reason for your emotional state.

Anakin didn’t fit in much either, having joined so late and being the so called chosen one. Because of this, you two found comfort in each other.

Anakin was so excited about being a jedi, though he also feared living up to the potential. In your eyes he just switched one slave owner for the next, as that was how it felt to you. But he was young and bright, so you didn’t wanna rain on his parade.

But just before your 13th birthday, you were taken as a padawan of one of the lesser known and vaguer Jedi of the order, Jon Antilles. He was a person who followed the will of the force and not the order, and the force led him to you.

He would later tell you that he looked into your eyes and saw the fire raring within you, unable to be quelled and as a result, making you someone who would suffer under the pressure and expectations of the order.

Saying goodbye to Anakin was hard, as you two had found yourselves as the only true friend the other had. Many feared you because of your known anger and revenge seeking tendencies, and Anakin because of the heavy burden of the prophesy.

But as two former slaves, you also both knew that the galaxy was vast, and that you had to go where the currents took you. Anakin also understood, even though he still didn’t fully understand the order, that you didn’t belong within the temple and that you needed to spread your wings.

Before you left, you pressed a kiss to Anakin’s forehead and gave him a bracelet made out of a thick black cord. It chafed the skin but was sturdy enough to take anything that may hit it. It was the last keepsake you had of your parents, and it had been what kept you going for all this time, and now you wanted Anakin to have it.

So, with one last goodbye, and promises whispered in the language of slaves, you left with your new Master, who told you not to call him master but instead refer to him as your teacher.

Jon Antilles had seen the worst the galaxy had to offer, and had no wish to be referred to as master by someone who was once a slave.

Back at the temple Anakin would find himself crying silently and tearlessly in his room, mourning the loss of a friend, his only friend. Obi Wan would feel his grief in the force, and would go to comfort him, knowing what it is like to lose someone so dear to you.

This would most likely lead to their relationship being better in this universe, at least a little. As that one moment helped cement a deeper level of trust and understanding.

Anakin stayed with the order and became more and more skilled, a part of him waiting for the moment you two would reunite. The bracelet stayed around his wrist, though he moved it to some other part of his body to keep it hidden, and other jedi started mumbling comments about attachment.

You thrived under Antilles, as he didn’t follow the orders from the council, the order, or even the republic. He only seemed to care about where the force wanted him, and by extension you, to go.

Your teacher was a firm believer in the light, but he also saw that the dark existed, so when you for the first time grasped the dark side in a life-or-death situation, he didn’t punish you like you feared.

Using the dark side once means it’s always with you, but instead of shunning you, your teacher helps you find balance, at least to the best of your ability.

The dark side is hard to master, and maybe you never fully do. But you never give yourself too it completely, always holding a tight grasp on the light beside it, letting the two feed off of each other to keep you from going down an unforgivable path.

Your anger and grudges still persist, and there are times you end up being needlessly cruel, but you catch yourself before its too late. During these times your teachers help is necessary, until you master it on your own.

Because of the nomadic lifestyle of Antilles and you, you end up ready to go on your own much before most other Padawan. Life experiences matures a person, and Antilles trusts you to do what is right, even if he has caught you practicing lightning or sucking the life energy out of things.

So as Anakin still works hard to be a better padawan and to fit the tight mold the order places upon him, you explore the outer parts of the galaxy, running with bounty hunters and pirates alike.

One might think you would be discovered as a jedi one way or another, but thanks to your less and jedi personality, and preferences for other weapons, you are never figured out.

Your loyalty to the rules of the order are also very very loose, if not nonexistent. The many experiences you have out in the galaxy puts many things into perspective, and you make your own theories and ideas about how the force works, theories that struggle against the rules of the jedi.

During all this time, Anakin can’t seem to leave your mind. Hes always present somewhere in there, the thin thread of a bond between the two of you so skinny its barely there anymore after all this time. But every now and again, you like to give it a little tug, smiling to yourself when he tugs back.

You two meet again during one of Anakin’s missions with Obi Wan, a mission that’s taken them further away from the core than Anakin has been since he was taken in by the jedi.

It’s a mission involving a slave trader who’s somehow smuggling slaves in and out of the republic, and the two jedi were sent to check it out but not get involved, much to Anakin’s annoyance.

They end up splitting up, not wanting to be suspected, and Anakin has to wear something to cover his head to hide his Padawan braid.

In the end, Anakin finds the hideout of the Slave traders, and just as he’s about to report it back to Obi Wan, a figure swoops in and starts ransacking the place.

Anakin can only watch with shock as you tear through the slave traders, the darkness inside you purring at their spilled blood, as the light silently approves of the justice you act out. Its only after you’ve freed all the slaves and take your hood off that Anakin recognizes you.

One way or another he follows you and corners you, in the way Anakin does, eyes wide but sparkling at how much skill you had shown in there, many questions leaving him as he wants to know what you have been up too and how you got here.

Most jedi would probably have disapproved of you killing the slavers, but Anakin had never seen slavers as anyone worth living, not that he could share those thoughts with anybody.

But at some point, you end up taking the Jedi padawan back to the room you booked for the night, where you two spend the entire night talking about what’s happened since last time you met, the bond between you strengthening after so long apart.

After that, you two keep bumping into each other. You had a feeling the force was playing a role in this, and you swore you could hear it giggling in amusement a sit pushed you together with its chosen one again and again.

Whenever you were around, the mission always ended much faster, meaning Anakin could slip away and spend time with you before reporting back to Obi Wan.

During this time, the childish crush he had had on you all that time ago comes back with a vengeance. Even when he sees you use sith lightning for the first time, he can’t seem to feel anything by affection for you.

Anakin knows he should fear you, but even as your turned turn yellow for a second or two as you lean fully into the dark during a battle, he only seems able to find your beautiful.

When Anakin kisses you for the first time, neither of you truly know how to react. Anakin’s never been in a relationship, and you have never really been with anyone you truly had feelings for. But Anakin just couldn’t keep it to himself anymore, even as he knows it goes against everything the order has taught him.

If he truly were to follow the order, Anakin would have to report that you had fallen, even though you still used the light as much as you did the dark. After that he would have to stay away from you, lest you corrupt him. But he just can’t, so he stays, slipping you information so you know where his next mission goes, so you “accidentally” end up with a contract on that planet.

You settle on Coruscant for a while, which means Anakin can sneak out and spend time with you away from prying eyes.

The fact that you use the dark without succumbing to it ends up helping Anakin not fall when that time comes, but for now, you just help him get a better understanding of the force and how you have come to see it as an entity.

Obi Wan regularly wonders where Anakin goes, and worries to some degree, but he does realize that Anakin always feels lighter and more at peace when he returns from his outings, so he lets him have them to himself, hoping his Padawan would tell him if there was anything he needed to know.

As a result of your status, Anakin would start to think about leaving the order someday. Maybe not soon, but maybe one day he would like to leave with you and just go where the force takes you two.

He knows it’s a romantic fantasy, but Anakin can’t help but bask in it, even if he has to do it in secret. Being your partner just brings him more peace than any meditation ever has, and Anakin never wants to let you go.

[zeroseuniverse]

Not A Monster

Word Count:1.6K Pairing: Jungkook X Fem Reader Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Navigation

The most common way people give up their power is by assuming they have none. That is the mindset, the ideals, the lifestyle that is needed to survive this world. The world is encouraging segregation and oppression of those who are different. Nobody knows where exactly the mutant gene came from, but what they did know? It was spreading like wildfire, new inventions coming out to suppress the new abilities presenting themselves left and right.  

“An inhibitor? What type?” she questioned as she moved through the mutant hospital, her feet keeping a fast pace to keep up with Jungkook, the nurse who was leading her to the latest critical case.

“It’s a muzzle of some kind, he was caught hiding in an abandoned warehouse, he’s undocumented, when officers found him, he tried to use what they believe was a supersonic scream to incapacitate them. They were bleeding from the ears,  so I checked with the normies wing, they’re all fine and expected to make a full recovery.” The tattooed man explained lifting his arm to push aside the curtain for the woman, her hands staying nestled in her pockets like they usually were. 

“No offense Jeon, but I don’t give a shit about the officers, they’re not any more important than my patient.” She said plainly, leaving the nurse slightly pouting from the dry response, he wished the doctor would praise his efforts every once in a while. The man huffed before spinning on his heel and heading back to the nurse's station to meet Jimin and Taehyung, the other nurses who seemed to be goofing off rather than working at the moment both men immediately sensed the added presence, the two looked up at the doe-eyed man with teasing grins.

“Did you strike out again, Jeon?” Taehyung teased, promptly throwing his hands up to cover his face as Jungkook threw a pen at him. 

“Watch the face!!!” Jimin yelped, also throwing his hands up to protect Tae, “It’s the only thing he’s got going for him.” 

“Yah!” Taehyung yelled in offense, smacking his hands on both of the giggling offenders.

“Don’t you three have anything better to do than goof around?” Jin wondered as he walked up to the nurse's station, passing a file over to Jimin to put away.

“Yes,” The three let out shamefully, sticking their tongue out at the man's back as soon as he turned around. 

“I saw that!” Y/N called as she strode past the nurses, not even looking up from her case file. Jungkook’s eyes honed onto her gloved hands, pouting when he realized they were still covered, he often wondered if that was the only reason he was so dead set on getting her to warm up to him, he was unbelievably curious about her quirk. 

He saw her lip lift just slightly into a smirk. He had never seen that much emotion on her face in a long time. He excitedly turned to his friends hoping that they both caught the motion too, the two were giggling at his excitement, both shooting him a thumbs up.  His day was made.

—

She wasn’t always that way, she used to be the sweetest person in school, and that’s what drew him in. When she was pulled out of school for a month, he was so worried, until she reappeared a completely different person; However, Jungkook wasn’t going to move on.  If she said jump, he’d ask how high, if she called, he’d come running. Maybe she knew that, maybe she was so aware that he could be the best person to help her in her time of need, maybe he was the only one she felt so strongly about that she stayed as far away as possible to keep him safe. She had watched him from afar for years, having shared so many classes in school, of course, she’d fall for him. The sweet boy who always considers everyone else, a silent protector, that’s what she knew him as. Especially when snacks began to appear in her locker, she caught him in the act a few times, giggling as he struggled with her lock while holding the snacks, his tongue rolling out and resting on his lips as he focused on the task.

Maybe it was these memories that led her to his apartment that night, the faith that he could help her and not repeat a word of it to anyone if she asked. She weakly pounded on the door, suddenly not feeling too confident as she stood vulnerable in front of his door, the creeping feeling of doubt climbed up her being, sending her to spin on her heel the longer she was left to wait. The door swung open, revealing the man pulling a grey shirt down his torso, he looked at her bewildered. He ran his doe eyes down her body, to confirm she was there. “Help,” She muttered in pain.

When his eyes caught on to the wounds and torn clothing that littered her body he gasped, a hand reaching out to pull her into his home, “What happened to you?” He asked, hands and feet immediately moving to grab his first aid kit to help tend to her wounds. 

“Sentinels. The bastards caught me going home from work and scanned me, they started beating me, I had to.” She explained, the last statement coming out so much quieter, almost unsure of it, “I had to.” She repeated, like a mantra hoping that she could begin believing it herself.

“Okay, Okay, you had to do what?” Jungkook questioned again, getting on his knees after sitting her on the couch and beginning to tend to her leg wounds. His hands were moving swiftly but with the gentle touch, you’d see someone use when caring for a porcelain doll.

“I had to, Jeon, I had to, I promise I’m not a monster, I never met to hurt anyone.” She sputtered, her eyes watering, a few tears falling as she began to panic thinking of her actions.

“Hey, I don’t think you’re a monster I could never. But can you give me a rundown? Or do you want to wait until I’m done fixing you up and we get you some food and water.” He offered, coming level with her face, searching her eyes trying to show her that he did in fact care. After she agreed to wait, he continued his work, moving up her body til he tended to the very last wound on her head, he nurtured every wound with the tenderest touch before leveling his eyes with her own once again. 

“You will never be a monster. You’re just trying to survive. We all are, this world isn’t safe for any of us, mutants or humans. Whatever you did, I’m sure you did it to survive.”

“They just kept going, I tried to hold off, but then they brought out the batons and… I was so scared, Jungkook, I thought I was going to die.” She explained, choking some words out here and there as tears once again welled up. “My ability…I’m not proud of it, I hid it as long as I could.”

“You’re undocumented?” Jungkook wondered, his hand moving to cup her cheek, thumb wiping away her tears as they rolled down. She sniffled as she nodded her head almost a small bit. “What’s your….” He trailed awkwardly not knowing if it was an appropriate question, or maybe for better terms a comfortable question.

“I…I absorb energy when I touch people, skin-to-skin contact, it’s why I wear gloves.” She explained, fidgeting slightly with her torn gloves.

“I’ve been touching your skin this whole time…” Jungkook stated, not doubting her but noting that maybe there was something more that she wasn’t seeing. Her brows came together in confusion before drifting her eyes to focus on his hand that was still resting on her cheek, zoning into her senses she did indeed feel energy sinking into her skin but he looked just as healthy, with no sign of discomfort that usually follows skin to skin contact. She was confused.

Jungkook brought his hand down grabbing her hand instead of touching where the exposed skin was, he didn’t feel anything but euphoric by being able to be this close to her, it was odd. 

–

“So you can’t touch anyone at all?” He wondered as he moved around the kitchen to cook up some food, he had been asking questions for about 20 minutes now, and this was about the 3rd time he’d asked this one.

“Well, I don’t know anymore considering you’re still standing.” She answered, “Why are you so focused on this specific question?”

“Because it means a lot of things.” He shrugged, moving the pan off of the burner before turning to face her, leaning forward to rest his elbow on the counter, a position that was all too enticing for her mental state.

“Have you ever held hands with someone? No gloves?” when he saw her shake her head, he maneuvered slightly closer,” Have you ever .... hugged someone?” she shook her head yet again, and he stood to his full height, walking around the counter to stand in front of him. Her heart was beating faster and faster every time he moved closer, his eyes were still locked on her own, never breaking contact. “Have you ever kissed someone.” it wasn’t a question, it was a challenge and as she shook her head, his eyes dropped looking at her lips he leaned in just a little further, his lips nearly brushing her own. “Can I try something?” He wondered, and for the first time in what felt like forever she nodded, and he wasted no time. Both of the two hungry after years of starvation, both feeling overpowered with the energy surging, she was almost high off of the energy he was radiating and he was feeling calm, like he was finally able to relax and rest his demons were at rest, and as her arms looped around his neck, he knew he was home.  For now.