#so manage your expectations

[morganbritton132]

Continuing from this (starting here and here)

Hopper doesn’t want to think about Steve.

He doesn’t really want to even see the kid or his broken arm or his wide gap-tooth smile where he’s starting to lose baby teeth. Every interaction is a reminder that he’s not doing anything to stop this clear case of child neglect.

He’s failing Steve and if he’s failing a kid whose problems are so blatantly obvious, then he could fail Sarah when the problems are close to home.

So no, Hopper doesn’t say anything when he walks into Melvards and sees Steve at the check counter. He nods to Joyce and continues on.

He’s got a list from his wife and that’s all he’s here for.

Sure, he noticed that on the check out counter is a tube of toothpaste, a box of cereal, and a pint of milk. Sure, he clocked Steve with his chin resting on the counter, pushing coins across it to Joyce and asking, “How ‘bout now?”

That’s just good observation. He’s a cop. It’s his job.

“That brings you to $2.54,” Joyce tells him. “You need 1 dollar and 0.32 cents more.”

Hopper is not listening to Steve sigh. He’s not standing next to a shelf of sunscreen watching Steve push the toothpaste to the side like, “I don’t need to brush my teeth. Is it enough now?”

“How about this,” Joyce whispers, leaning on the counter like they’re going to share a secret. Hopper is sure she’s crinkling her nose when she pushes the money back over to him, “How about you take all your quarters and I let you take your cereal, and your milk, and your toothpaste.”

Whereas he can’t see Joyce’s face, he can see the instant suspicion on Steve’s face when he steps back from the counter, “That’s stealing.”

“Yeah, silly, if you steal it. You’re not doing that,” Joyce concedes. “I’m letting you have this stuff.”

“I don’t think you’re allowed to do that, Miss Joyce. You’ll get in trouble.”

“Well, how about a trade?”

“Like a Quick Pro Skrull?”

“Sure,” Joyce says easily. “I will trade you $2.54, one box of cereal, one pint of milk, and a tube of bubblegum-flavored toothpaste….if you let me sign your cast.”

Steve’s voice is soft, considerate the way kids aren’t supposed to be when he says, “Miss Joyce, that’s not a fair trade.”

“It’s the only thing I want, baby.”

“Fine,” Steve agrees, laying his casted arm on the counter. “I get my allowance in two days and I’m going to buy you a flower.”

“That sounds lovely, sweetheart.”

Hopper leaves the sunscreen- it’s not even on his list - and goes to the canned goods in the next aisle. While there, he has a better view of Joyce writing her name on Steve’s cast.

“You know, Steve,” She tells him. “I’m going to put my phone number right here because I have little boy about your age. His name is Jonathan.”

“I know Jonathan from school.”

“That’s good! Maybe some time you two can play together.”

“Oh, no thanks, Miss Joyce,” Steve shakes his head sadly. “My dad says you’re poor an’ I’m not allowed to play with poor people ‘cause poor people are lazy and don’t work hard even though you have a job…”

Steve pauses like he’s contemplating that before continuing, “And Tyler - that’s Tommy’s big brother. Tommy is my best friend and I wish I lived at his house - he says that sometimes people are so poor that they can’t a’ford food and they eat babies. He says that happened in Ireland and he would know too ‘cause his great-great-great-ate grandpa is from there.”

“I’m not a baby,” He tells her seriously, “But my Nonna says I’m a sweet boy and one time I was playing with a kid from the trailer park and he bit me.”

He tells her, “I don’t wanna be eaten.”

Joyce blinks at him.

Hopper blinks too where he’s listening in.

Steve doesn’t blink at all but instead gathers up his stuff. He gives her a big smile and says, “Thanks, Miss Joyce. I love you. Bye.”

Then he’s gone.

The store is empty except for Hopper in the baby food aisle and Joyce at the counter. She asks aloud, “Did I just get accused of cannibalism?”

Hopper has never laughed harder.

[vaguely-concerned]

the barista lady in the treviso café fucking giggles every time you buy the fancy coffee lucanis likes from her btw. can't believe the game is calling out rook and me like this

[phobiaexists]

Thing I made for me and a friend based off our headcanons

007n7 design here is based off their own headcanons of him I won’t normally draw him with the horns or spines

[clumsypuppy]

i cant go back to that life man

[hoofpeet]

It feels like a lot of the ppl who are asking you to trigger tag the derealization stuff r probably the same people to ask for trigger tags on self harm scars. Like yeah mayb some ppl might be triggered by them but it's also a very real part of someone's body (+life) that they r always living with. And it's weird to ask someone to trigger tag that??? Like what a fucked up thing to say to someone? No you can't have your arms uncovered in your own space because it makes me upset to see that part of you/no you can't make a mild vent post on your own blog because it makes me upset to see that part of your life?? The unfollow/block button is right there goddam. Just walk out you can leave and all that. Anyway ur post really resonated with me and I'm so sorry for all the hate you got over it

YEAH people treating any kind of scarring as some sort of taboo subject is also really annoying to me.. Putting effort into any art starts to not feel worth it when people expect to like. Take everything they want from you while ignoring whatever they don't want to 'deal with'.... very very disheartening to be expected to be quiet about normal parts of my life while. also pouring all my time into making art for other's enjoyment . Like an internet jester

-neway ! Glad my post helped a little at least- it was nice to see others relate to it, so whatever weird discourse it sparked is worth dealing with if it comforted anyone 👍

[mendokayalways]

Unexpected feelings received from my lady jane. When Jane tells Guildford that there's no cure to Ethianism and there shouldn't be because there's nothing wrong with him and she wants everyone else in England to see that and has the power to "heal England" but Guildford responds with "Fuck England. Heal me!" As someone who struggles with chronic pain and internalized ableism, that really got me. Like there's stuff happening to me that takes me away from the life that I would ideally like to live and there's nothing I can do to change it but the desperation and grief and rage is so fucking real...I just didn't expect those feelings from a fantasy regency tudor rom com.

[bougiebutchbinch]

clicked on ur blog from the awesome surgical theatre post and saw that u don't practice as much now adays bc of disabilities! if u ever want to write about it, i'd be interested in hearing what it's like to be disabled in the healthcare field bc i don't see it being feasible for me but it's lowkey a dream

Healthcare is honestly an AMAZING career!

For... some disabilities.

If you're autistic and have adhd but aren't SUPER sensitive to Lots Of Sensory Stimuli (it is. very noisy. and very bright. and everything stinks) it is the best field I have ever found for getting into the hyperfocus zone while also flitting between a million tasks at once!

But on the physical side... it's gruelling, ngl.

I have a million Reasonable Adjustments in place. Half the time they get ignored because of understaffing, and I have to put my own very fragile body at risk to help patients. That's entirely because of shitty management, but I've heard it's a pretty endemic problem.

Also because of understaffing, if you have a lot of sick days, it's a problem. It shouldn't be your problem, but it winds up being that - again, because of shitty management.

I'm very, very lucky in that I am incredibly driven to do the ridiculous necessary amounts of physio/take all my meds/do everything 'right' as a patient. It's kept me working in the field far longer than I would've been able to, but it's also Very Fucking Difficult and does require, for want of a better word, a grindset.

I have a specific five-year plan that will get me into what is essentially a desk job, but where I can still make all the diagnoses (and hopefully still have some patient communication T^T) that I love. I've been told by my specialists that I might not even have five years where I'm able to walk even at a stagger and use my arms, but uhhhh. We'll worry about that when we get to it, lol.

If all else fails, I will become The Enemy (a manager) and pray that the hospital I'm moving to is more accessible to staff than my current one. Where the managers' officers are all up a steep flight of stairs and you literally cannot reach them by lift. Because fuck disabled people I guess.

All in all: yolo attitude mixed with reasonable expectations and strong ambitions/drive will get you far! But like. It's difficult. Really fucking difficult. I won't lie. I don't regret it, and I genuinely LOVE working in healthcare - it energises me and I have a passion for it that I've never felt for anything else except writing!

But if you're considering this career as a disabled person, I think you need to be very realistic with yourself regarding not just your own physical capabilities, but what reasonable adjustments will actually be put in place and how management will try and skirt around them. Shit sucks but it's reality, and at the end of the day, the patients are your priority.

You shouldn't be put in a position where you have to choose between your health and theirs, but you might be. What decision would you make in that scenario? I think that's a good question to ask yourself, before you take the plunge!

[faggotisaacfloofs]

hello everyone be so fucking proud of me!!!

I had two infuriating AAC glitches in a row while trying to convey a stressful thing to my caregiver today

After the first one, I stopped, closed my eyes, and took 5 deep breaths, relaxed my muscles, and then started typing again, ver, very intentionally and slowly.

And then the second glitch happened.

and i managed to freeze instead of hitting my ipad. And took a few breaths totally frozen with hands up. then made the sign to caregiver to move the ipad away from me so I wouldn't break it

And then i took more deep breaths, and flapped my arms as hard as my joints can stand, and took more deep breaths. And got out my phone instead to text my caregiver because my phone doesn't glitch like that, and told them what happened and finished making the plan for next week.

And then i remembered that if i stop using the touch screen and type with my Bluetooth keyboard, my ipad doesn't glitch. So I grabbed that and then could type into my ipad while not being close enough to smash the ipad if something went wrong. And it worked.

I had TWO ipad glitches deleting what I was trying to say less than 30 seconds apart. But I didn't break or throw or hit my ipad!!!! I didn't smash my keyboard or hit my head or anything. I breathed and I tried my strategies of time, waiting for the wave to pass, and that let me remember other options for communication exist.

I still feel like I'm on the verge of a meltdown, but the point is that i did not immediately have a meltdown from this or break anything, and that is very hard skill i have been working so much on for a very long time.

please clap!!!

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

I love how Brennan as a DM was all "Riz, you need more than good grades. You need to stand out. You need showstopping extracurriculars." and to Kristen he was all, "I'm going to throw the weight of an entire religion at you, make you relive your family trauma through your brother and give you relationship issues."

Yet, SOMEHOW, when Brennan introduced little miss four dogs, the driven type A rogue, and had her run for president, setting up the perfect foil for Riz's character and an amazing extracurricular for Riz to aim for in one fell swoop, THE ENTIRE PARTY WENT "KRISTEN 4 PREZ!!!! SHRIMP PARTY 2.0!!!"

Don't get me wrong, I love that Ally went for the fucking throat on vibes alone. Like, that was truly loathing at first sight and I love that for them, I really do.

BUT ALSO THAT WAS RIZ'S PLOTLINE KRISTEN. YOU HAVE LIKE THREE PLOTLINES KRISTEN. WHY ARE YOU ADDING MORE TO YOUR PLATE KRISTEN.

[kiyomitakada]

if i finish this homework before its due date (tomorrow 2am) (so in 2 hours) i will reward myself by liveblogging the first chapter of dn manga in japanese

[drsantosgf]

like obviously i do think there are positives to the bvddie fandom, such as engagement, creativity, support, etc. and i don't think oliver or ryan want to dampen that or lessen that but this fandom is such a mixed bag and the negatives often outweigh those positives because of it's sheer aggression. the harassment, the stalking, the threats, etc. this press tour is such a good example of this because despite the fact that oliver stark and ryan guzman have both said

1) eddie is straight [x4]

2) they are brothers

3) "not sure what else there is to explore"

4) buck wasn't lying when he said he doesn't love eddie

5) it's good to show a friendship between a heterosexual man and a [bisexual] man

despite ALL OF THAT happening in the last like 48 hours, they are given a buzzfeed promo video of the two of them reading thirst tweets, where some fans mention bvddie, without saying anything especially positive about the future of the ship, and suddenly that confirms bvddie will go canon or at the very least that it doesn't shut it down. all because of one video that isn't even about the ship. oliver has talked before about how he can't say anything without it being taken as a sign of bvddie canon [insert season here]. he can't even take a nice photo of a street sign without people thinking it's a sign of bvddie, which they then get mad at him for when the scenario they made up in their heads doesn't come to fruition as if it's his fault in particular. so when oliver uses the word "marred" as the first word that pops into his head to describe his experience with that portion of the fandom, only for him to walk it back and replace it with a neutral "impacted" i don't think he misspoke or just couldn't think of another word, i think it speaks to the very frustrating experience dealing with a group of people who do not take what you say seriously, only for them to get hurt and blame you as if you hadn't warned them at all.

[tired-demonspawn]

hey. so.

didnt plan on reading sonic the movie fanfiction of all things, right? right.

but alas the picture of outsider pov mean bean customer witnessing stone pining on main between movies 1 and 2 was so utterly VIVID in my mind i ended up looking some up.

because i mean. the setup is so obvious, it is practically begging to be written and then read by some fanatical idiot like myself. no way an author hasnt yet taken advantage of the premise.

ONLY TO FIND OUT NOBODY HAS

WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?????

(left an essay in the tags, christ 💀)

[electrikworm]

Muzzled

Relationships: BD-1 & Cal Kestis

Content Warnings: Blood and Injury, Psychometry

Summary:

An unfortunate encounter with bounty hunters leaves Cal in a muzzle holding awful force echos. Fighting against the memories of the past as well as the threats of the present, Cal struggles to free himself.

A short fic for @whumpay day 6, Muzzle

Word count: 1,456

Read on Ao3

Inhaling sharply through his nose, Cal yanks at the chain attached to the cuffs around his wrists. But when it comes down to pure strength, the two bounty hunters, one of which is a large droid, outmatch Cal, and when they tug him forwards, he's forced to stumble after them. This should be easy, embarrassingly so really. The cuffs aren't blocking his connection to the force and the smaller bounty hunter has Cal's lightsaber casually strapped to his hip. If Cal could draw his weapon into his hand, he'd be out in seconds, even with his head pounding from the wound that lead him to this situation in the first place. The only thing keeping Cal where he is is the contraption strapped to his face, some sort of muzzle. It's old and designed to fit on a humanoid face, made of heavy metal with sharp edges. Cal can't even open his mouth, the thing forcing his jaw shut as it bites into his skin. A muzzle alone would do very little to inhibit Cal's ability to fight back, if it weren't for the dark memory clinging to the object. It's taking all of Cal's focus just to shield his mind from the dark cloud threatening to overwhelm him if he lets his guard down. Cal knows the memory is bad, just how bad isn't clear. If he's lucky, he'll end up with a headache. If he isn't, Cal could pass out or have a seizure. He's still weighing the odds in his head, deciding if the risk is worth the potential consequences. At least BD-1 got away. That's certainly an improvement on the last time Cal got caught by the Haxion Brood. "Told you it would work," the humanoid bounty hunter, a Pantoran by the looks of it, says to the droid with a grin, glancing back at Cal. He yanks the chain around Cal's arms hard enough to make him stumble.

Cal's tried letting the chain go slack, to approach the bounty hunters and attempt escape without using the force. But the Pantoran has some sort of cattle prod that he shoved into Cal's ribs the last two times, not giving Cal a lot of options to fight back with his hands tied. "Well 'scuse me for not believing you when you said the Jedi's affected by bad vibes. Sounds a bit stupid, even you got admit that." The droid has female programming by the sounds of it. It seems like they don't know what his psychometry is precisely, but the fact that bounty hunter's know of it at all is worrying. Psychometry is a gift, Cal's been reminded of this countless times by countless different people throughout his life. He sees it as one, the ability has helped him and others over and over, first during the war, than on the mission Cal's on now. But psychometry can also be used against him, just as these bounty hunters have.

Cal would rather not hand his enemies the perfect way to put him out of commission. He hopes the knowledge hasn't spread too far. "Doesn't matter if it sounds stupid if it works," the Pantoran answers. "Doesn't it, little Jedi?" Cal wouldn't respond to that comment even if he wasn't muzzled. Instead, he tries to use his captors distraction to throw them off balance. Cal ends up being the one stumbling, knee hitting the ground as he losses his footing. Still, he won't go without a fight and he aims to make this as difficult as possible for the apir of bounty hunters. The weak effort of resistance, however, seems to have set something in motion, a flash of white descending from the raised rocks they're passing, landing on the Pantoran's shoulder with a flash of electricity as he's turned to his prisoner. Cal recognizes BD in an instant. With a yelp, the Pantoran flails, just managing to grab BD-1's leg, leaving the droid shrieking and cursing. Cal wants to call out to his friend, muzzle preventing him from getting anything of substance past his lips. Kriff the consequences, Cal thinks to himself, reaching out in the force both to propel himself forward and pull his lightsaber into his grip. He's activated it close enough to embed the blade in the Pantorans chest before he can even worry about the echo hitting him. That's the last lucid action Cal gets to execute. The memory is a swirling mass of violence, pain and fear, flashes of the torture previous wearers were exposed to, at the hands of these bounty hunters and at the hands of others. It's nothing new or surprising, nothing Cal hasn't seen before, but that hardly makes it pleasant.

The sound of long past tears and screams muffled by the muzzle fill Cal's head as he desperately tries to cling to reality, to the threats in the present. A metal fist collides with his ribs, and Cal can only just register that this pain isn't one the memory's exposing him to. He pushes further in the force, trying to blindly feel for the bounty droid that's attacking him. Cal hopes that BD knows to keep out of the way. A bad feeling in Cal's chest makes him swing the blade of his lightsaber to his right, making contact with something, severing it. Cal's hair is grabbed and he can't tell the memory apparat from reality in that moment, echo showing him fragments of a large figure looming over him, hissing vile threats into his ear as a small, terrified voice whimpers in fear.

Cal struggles, kicking his legs until they make contact with a hard surface, like the main body of a bounty hunter droid. He swings in that direction, being dropped before his blade can land Cal fails to catch himself, arms still bound and barely conscious enough able to make out what's happening, landing on his shoulder hard.

A shock-wave of pain runs through him, muzzle tight around his face as his body tries to let out a vocal response. He feels dizzy, nauseous, the fight against the force echos clinging to the muzzle near impossible. The bounty droid could be anywhere, and Cal has no idea if he actually hit the Pantoran enough to kill him in the first place. Then, like being dropped in cold water out of nowhere, reality returns to Cal, bright and sharp, leaving him gasping as the muzzle falls off his face. It's pure instinct that makes him dodge the bounty droid's vicious downwards swing, rolling to the side just in time. She makes an almost surprised noise at Cal's sudden lucidity, the last noise she ever makes as Cal severs her body in two. Breathing like he just ran up a hill, Cal falls to his knees. The Pantoran lays dead a good two meters away and BD-1's soft chirps let him know his friend is safely on Cal's back. Cal sighs, pushing the lingering nauseating feeling from the echo away as he watches blood drip from his face onto his bound hands. His face stings, cuts from the device that was strapped to his face marring the lower half of his face. "Thanks," Cal mutters. If BD-1 hadn't acted as he did and unlocked the muzzle, Cal would have likely found himself paying Sorc Tormo another visit. BD-1 argues that it was nothing, using his boosters to hop off Cal's back and deal with his cuffed wrists. Blood keeps falling off Cal's face in droplets, splattering the top of BD's casing. If the little droid minds, he doesn't say anything.

Cal plans to give him a good once-over back on the Mantis anyway, he can already see scratches that bounty hunter put on his friend. With a soft click, Cal's wrists are free. He rubs at them once he's offered his arm for BD to climb up, pushing himself up out of the dirt with a groan. His head had been hurting already, but now a migraine is steadily settling in. Glancing at the two bounty hunters, Cal huffs. He hopes the knowledge of his abilities die with them. Just to be sure, he takes a moment to find the droids memory disk and destroy it, apologizing to BD for making him watch the gruesome act. Cal reckons it must be like watching someone's skull be cracked open so their brain can be cut up. "Think we're going to have to cut our trip short here, buddy," Cal sighs. "I need to lie down." BD-1 reacts like Cal just said he's dying, making the redhead laugh. Beeping in distress, BD offers Cal a stim. Thanking him quietly, Cal accepts the offered aid and sets of in the direction of the Mantis.

[serpentface]

What's the Wardi cultural take on Akoshos sleeping with/partnering with/marrying other Akoshos?

It's not highly regulated to a degree that there are overwhelming cultural norms about it. There's a lot of societal focus on akoshos being theoretically suitable sexual partners for both men and women due to being dual-gendered, but not to an extent that relationships with One Another are stigmatized.

They also largely get to escape from the most severe concerns about penetrator/penetrated power dynamics because they're not regarded as Men (they're regarded as dual-gendered, and they're a female social class on every practical level), there's no status of manhood to Lose by receiving sexual penetration. The only real thing you see in that department is people assuming that one acts as 'the man' and one acts as 'the woman', but this is largely due to preoccupation with a notion of sex being Penetration With A Penis (and that Penetration With A Penis means that one person is in a Man's Role and one person is in a Woman's Role). But this will not be regarded as unnatural as in same-gender male relations, akoshos will Have to take up a position in this sexual dichotomy if they want to have Real Sex (Penetration With A Penis) with each other, and this is not unnatural and doesn't involve gaining or losing status since they are simultaneously male and female, not men.

So like you might see individual culture critics finding stuff to nitpick about it as their annoyance of the week or a singular Guy here or there who thinks it's weird, but this isn't a widespread norm. The vast majority of people don't give a shit about akoshos having sex with each other. The worst thing you're likely to experience Solely by virtue of being in an akoshos-akoshos relationship is someone asking you (probably with genuine curiosity) which one does the man stuff and which one does the woman stuff.

Akoshos also don't experience Hard expectations for marriage (though there are societal pressures that make marriage an attractive safety net all the same, ESPECIALLY marriage to a man) so unofficial life-partnerships between akoshos are pretty much the Only same gender partnerships between unwed people that are going to go unquestioned. ((Sworn brotherhood is technically a same gender life partnership for men that is Functionally similar to marriage (in that it's a kin-making practice between unrelated adults), but the tradition is Built upon the assumption that both parties will be married to women and that a primary goal of this kinship is to provide security for both parties' wives and children)). Marriage obligations in general are more lax in the economically secure but not Wealthy lower mercantile classes (as obligations to support and perpetuate one's family are universal, but these obligations can be filled simply by having at least One son who can get hitched, and marriages in the lower classes have no political functions and therefore there's less reason to ensure All your children are wed (there's still incentives like dowry, but this is not desperately needed when a family is economically secure)). So akoshos in this class group tend to have a Lot more freedom in terms of their life arrangements and chosen partners (though still experience the limiting frameworks of structural misogyny in other capacities).

The only thing that is out of the picture is akoshos/akoshos marriage. Marriage in this society has a predominantly reproductive function, the concept of reproductively non-viable marriages is generally considered absurd. This is not JUST this culture's form of homophobia, as marriage is a very practical arrangement at its core - both in a reproductive capacity and as bedrock for the patriarchal blood-kinship family system that forms the core social unit. The idea of same gender marriage isn't just absurd because 'ewwww weird' it's like, that Cannot work within this system, it Cannot fill core functions of what a marriage intends to do here, the ways on which marriage and kinship are BUILT makes same gender marriage practically (rather than just socially) untenable.

The sole exception to the 'marriage = reproductively viable" rule is that akoshos can be married to men (which in practice is almost always as a remarriage after a man has secured At Least an heir). This has a Little bit of internal logic here in that they perform predominantly female social roles (thus are suited to being a wife, even if they can't bear children) (and also on practical levels of them having the same legal status as women) but it's really more of a 'this is just how it's always been' kind of thing. A lot of the older pre-Wardi identity dual-gender roles that got mashed together under the 'akoshos' name would have involved marriage to a man as a second wife/concubine, in addition to his primary wife who would bear his children. Men potentially having multiple spouses has not been retained as a cultural practice, but the notion that an akoshos Can be a wife to a man has survived into modern day legal and doctrinal practices around marriage.

So like this being said, marriage as it is legally defined is only between a man and a woman, a man and an akoshos, or a woman and an akoshos. In practice the latter two are comparatively VERY rare- a man/akoshos marriage cannot provide children (though an akoshos can practically fulfill all other obligations and duties of a wife), a woman/akoshos marriage Can provide children (and while akoshos cannot function as a male heir, these children Will take their akoshos-parent's family name (though the wife retains her father's family name)), but akoshos are legally grouped with women in terms of rights and privileges (including being permanently under legal domain of their father unless they have been legally handed off to a male husband) and Cannot provide hard power patriarchal support that this family system is built upon and therefore depends upon, which makes these marriages socio-economically insecure. They can obviously still be a good partner and parent, but this is not the same as having the Legal hard power of a patriarch.

Akoshos marrying each other would be reproductively and socially nonviable, and is treated as a similarly absurd concept to a man marrying a man or a woman marrying a woman. It's just not a part of the marriage and kinship framework, it's not a thing that you can Do.

[spaceoddy]

i lied. put your clothes back on. we're going to talk about how just because a piece of media doesn't give you your hyper-specific wants exactly how you want them exactly when you want them doesn't mean it's a bad piece of media

[necrotic-nephilim]

i’m feeling messy. for the new ask game, 5 :)

for the choose violence ask game!

5. worst discord server and why

of COURSE you would choose to be this messy, you lil rat. <3 i will be kind enough to not name the server, it's a general Batfamily server i found on Disboard. most Bafam discord servers tend to be... anti leaning so it's something i sort of expect, but this one has a "ship advisory list", including ships you're not allowed to share media of (like fanfic or fanart) and if you discuss the ship you can be told to stop talking about it. and there were the typical ships you'd expect like Joker/Harley, BatJokes, and ofc a "no proships" umbrella ban. but some of the ships fucking baffled me. like canon ships were on this list. ships i to this day can't figure out why they'd be banned. the top ships of the list that just *got me* in terms of "... what is bad about this ship???" were

DickBabs

DonnaDick

Barry/Diana

Barry/Dinah

JayRose

Catwoman/Penguin

Talia/Bane

some of these i didn't know were shipped in the *first place* but even if they are, i can't fathom what's wrong with them. some of them are canon, normal ships? like what did JayRose do wrong. it's one of Jason's healthier relationships. and DonnaDick somehow gets me the most. my only guess is that antis heard them referred to as the Wonder Twins and thus decided the ship was incestual. bc otherwise how. why. i laugh everytime i think about DonnaDick being problematic.

on one hand i do think it's fucking hilarious of a list and it always makes me laugh bc i cannot fathom the mentality. but on the other hand it is sort of depressing that so many public social platforms for discussing the Batfam are becoming *so* anti-leaning that ships can be banned simply bc the mods of the server decided they were problematic for some unforeseen reason. it was the biggest depiction of "i don't like this ship so it's problematic" i've ever seen. like where does the goalpost stop moving? when does it somehow become problematic to ship things in general? it was wild even for anti stuff. truly the most baffling server i've been in.