#so look out for queer people and poc!!

[vangbelsing]

Ever since Veilguard was announced, there's been an absolute tidal wave of hate ranging from vitriol for the art style, gameplay changes and overall feel/aesthetic of the game, to outright racism, homophobia and transphobia, as well as attacks on the devs and fans trying to enjoy the game. So I want to just put this out there.

It is valid to:

Not enjoy the art style, as no one should dictate what your aesthetic preference is

Prefer the systems/gameplay of previous DA games

Prefer to wait until the game is out before you buy into the hype

Distrust EA/Bioware due to its past and its current actions/situation

Criticize what you dislike about the game in your own posts

Simply decide that this game isn't for you

I encourage you to:

Speak out against the mass layoffs and often inhumane practices by EA and to elevate the voices of those impacted by them

Speak out against and bring attention to the problematic or harmful things EA/Bioware has/will engage(d) in, do, say, etc, willingly or unknowingly, in the future

Criticize EA, Bioware, the devs/team and Dragon Age itself about the things on which they can improve, as it is not too much to ask for someone/something to do better

Spread awareness of what EA/Bioware have done, what they are doing, and what they do in the future. Let people know the history of these companies so they can make informed decisions and to improve the working conditions for the teams at these studios

What you shouldn't do:

Attack or harass people who are excited for and showing support for the game.

Comment under the posts of fans or official trailers/interviews with the sole intention of hating on the game to ruin the excitement or fun for others. If you don't like it, don't interact with it.

Spread misinformation about the game in an attempt to negatively impact it

What is absolutely unacceptable:

Being a hateful fucking bigot

To all the hateful fucking bigots out there:

I keep seeing a repeat of comments like: "this isn't my Dragon Age!" "Dragon Age is too gay!" "Dragon Age has too many black/Asian, literally any person who isn't a cishet white male or a conventionally attractive straight white woman!" And you know what? You're absolutely correct! Dragon Age is gay! Dragon Age is a space where people of all colors, races, cultures, ethnicities, identities, sexualities, orientations, and all walks of life exist, both in world and in its fan base!

And as for this being "not your Dragon Age", again, you are absolutely correct! This isn't your Dragon Age, because Dragon Age isn't for you. It never has been, and it certainly isn't now. The co-creator is a gay man, the devs have always included queer people and poc, and despite its many flaws and the numerous ways in which it has let down the people belonging to those groups, it is still a space for them, which are created in part by people like them.

Dragon Age will always be inclusive, as it has been from the very first game that you love acting like you care about so much. There are gay, lesbian, bi, pan, trans, black, Asian, and all other kinds of people both in and behind these games! If you can't handle that, then fine! We don't want you anyway!

To the people who actually care about this series and who want this game and team to succeed:

I encourage all of you to let your voices be heard by the devs. Tell them exactly how you feel! Let them know what landed, what made you feel seen, what resonates, what you think needs work, where they stepped out of line; all of it! More than anything, there are real people behind this game, and they've poured years of their hearts, souls, time and talent into this piece, and it seems a lot of them genuinely care for their fans and this game and want to deliver the best game they can to us! And those people matter! They deserve a fair chance to see their work pay off without having to be negatively impacted by people who just want to spread hate and see others fail.

No one is above criticism, no matter how good their intention of how pure their desires are, so when they misstep, speak out! But while we should be sure to let the devs know how much this game means to us and how much what they do matters, let's also push for the fair treatment of everyone who was unfairly laid off or mistreated by EA/Bioware and who are still fighting for their due compensation for their hard work. Let's advocate for them in the months leading up to DA:TVs launch and the months after. And let the devs know how important it is to have those people's names in the credits!!!

And most importantly... Please be kind to and look out for one another!! There's so much going on in the world right now, and there is so much hatred being spread against minority groups, and we need to be compassionate to each other! Let's allow the game to be a thing that brings us together and gives us something to escape into and enjoy!

In closing:

Hate the game or love it, if you are transphobic, racist, homophobic, antisemitic, misogynistic, or any other kind of prejudiced bigot, THIS GAME IS NO PLACE FOR YOU!! NEVER WAS, NEVER WILL BE!!!!

Thanks for your time! Fuck TERFs and racists and all the other bigots!

[saturnniidae]

I miss being younger and believing the queer community was actually a safe space

[martyrbat]

blocking so many people tonight because how the hell do you post this without an ounce of self shame? 'there are people out there who are just as scared as you are' are you including the people your candidate has funded a genocide against? are you including the people Israel targets and opresses with the US regularly funding its crimes against humanity? the people who cant just go have a snack and talk to their friends because they watch their friends be murdered and theyre facing starvation? are you including the people you called the genocide of as a necessary sacrifice and something thats a 'lesser evil'? do you take into account their fear and trauma for a year of nonstop bombings, drones, missiles, shootings, invasions, etc?

'the world is going to be tense' its already fucking tense, you people just dont give a shit about anyone that isnt white or cant play into your ultimate victim complex to excuse your eager participation in genocide. you cant call for people to just 'survive' when you helped put a heavy asterisk next to who exactly expected to stay living if your war criminal wins.

[GO DONATE TO DOCTOR MOATH]

[badolmen]

“I don’t know why the op said this happened yesterday when this news is four months old”

This may shock you but it’s an election year in the US and even “the lesser evil” utilizes propaganda.

[laesas]

Seeing someone's awful, self-righteous, bad faith, rage bait take and realising that you already have them blocked for their other dogshit opinions 👌👌👌

[spid3r-trans]

does anyone have a spiderverse discord that’s not full of evil people

[foxgirlmoth]

My alarms were ringing while watching *that* Amy Cuddy video during a class today and I gotta say I might be fully right thinking that. Quick searches show she was taking a stance with someone claiming being trans is harmful (not surprising when a chunk of the talk is saying that Testosterone makes you aggressive/more forward, a major talking point people try to use against trans women and poc and also calling it the dominant hormone) and also someone mimicked her experiment with a lot more people and it seems that power poses didn't do anything. It also seemed like she was trying to evoke some inspiration porn (while talking about IQ, another thing I'm always wary about) and made no mention of what helped her get through college and saying it was just power poses. Did you get help going through college??? You're still a white cishet woman like. I can 100% seeing you having no problems paying for school and not having to work during that education. People doing these kinds of things recognize that privilege exists please.

[drtanner]

There's a very specific pattern of events that occurs with every new medium or platform. Every single one, without fail. It goes like this:

A new medium/platform arises.

Sex workers and pornographers, having been chased away from the platform/medium they were using previously, adopt the new medium/platform and become its pioneers.

The sex workers and pornographers popularise the new medium/platform. Lots of other people start to use it, too!

The owners of the medium/platform are making lots of money now. They decide that they don't need the sex workers and pornographers anymore.

The owners of the medium/platform make new rules that make sex work and pornography forbidden there. The sex workers and pornographers are chased away.

Once the pornographers and sex workers are gone, the medium/platform can market itself as respectable and becomes appealing to mainstream audiences. It becomes very popular.

The new people who have come to the medium/platform are painfully normal and very sheltered. In order to make the medium/platform more comfortable for themselves, they start to chase away other "undesireables" too, e.g., queer people, PoC, religious minorities, etc., etc..

The owners of the medium/platform allow this, if they aren't already actively encouraging it themselves, because they're making lots of money now and undesirables are broke.

Anyone who offends the delicate sensibilities of the medium/platform's main cohort of users is now being chased away, with the blessing of the medium/platform's owners.

Oh no. This is a Nazi bar now.

Meanwhile, having been chased away from the medium/platform, the sex workers and pornographers are looking for somewhere to go.

A new medium/platform arises.

Sex workers and pornographers, having been chased away from the medium/platform they were using previously, adopt the new medium/platform and become its pioneers.

Rinse, repeat.

This has been true for every medium/platform since the advent of fucking VHS, if not film itself or even earlier; indeed, many pioneer towns were built up around brothels that were later legislated out of existence when they weren't needed anymore. It's a betrayal that plays out again and again every time a new medium or platform comes up and grows popular enough to stand without the sex workers and pornographers who made it so.

For all of us who are currently searching desperately for a new medium or platform that won't eventually betray us in this way, good luck. 💜

[ultfreakme]

So.

I finished She-ra.

I wanted to watch it because I realized I rarely watched anything with a female-centric cast and I especially didn't interact with sapphic content despite being sapphic. Abundance of cishet male-specific stories and a love for action-adventure led me to not exploring the latter in stories centering women because I had my own biases. I didn't think there were nearly enough action-adventure stories centering women out there in comparison to men. I just gave into convenience. Also I'll be real, internalized misogyny.

She-ra was so breathtaking and impactful because close to a decade after watching Legend of Korra and the beginning of Korrasami, I got to watch a fully-explored lesbian relationship on-screen with all the action and adventure I wanted.

I saw too much of myself in all the characters. In Glimmer & Angella's mother-daughter bickering, in Catra's insecurities, in Mermista's distance and aversion to people but still wanting companionship. I saw me in bits and pieces across all these girls and women.

It's a rare moment for a POC queer woman like me to truly see myself anywhere. My identity is often considered rare enough to be mythic (although queer POC are fucking everywhere lbr).

I remember being an eight-year old, and watching The Little Mermaid for the first time. I was mesmerized, I sung "Part of Your World" and re-enacted in my tiny apartment with only enough space for a bed and a cupboard and nothing else where my entire family were. I'd sing it on top of my lungs and then I'd look in the mirror and see brown skin and black hair and the spell of being a mermaid underwater would break.

Then fast-forward to 2024, I see She-Ra and her magical princess friends say they need to recruit a powerful Sea Princess to their war efforts. I am excited only because my fascination for mermaids has never really gone away. Then our main crew arrive and what do I see?

A brown woman, a woman with my skin tone and my eyes and my wavy kind of hair. She's stand-offish and a little emo, and she controls the ocean. She can switch her legs for fins and swim!! Suddenly I'm eight again.

I also remember watching The Swan Princess for the first time and feeling strange butterflies every time I saw Odette in her beautiful white gown. I didn't know then that girls could like girls, all I had was this feeling. A buttery, soft feeling where I wanted to sit beside her and see her smile. As I grew up I understood it was me being attracted to her and thinking "there's no love story showing the way I love".

Enter Catra and Adora. I felt a silly kind of nostalgia seeing Catra in love with a magical girl in gold and white.

I could go ON AND ON with all these little details where bits of me were in the show. It made me a little less lonely, and made me a lot more hopeful. Seeing yourself in media is important. Obviously you don't need it to empathize with a character or understand them but seeing parts of your own experience on-screen is a different kind of high. Like, like woah I can be a protagonist like that? I don't need to erase myself?

A story which treated parts of me- all the good and the bad parts- with kindness and gave it all a happy ending. I am so used to reading tragedy, expecting cruelty from even fantasy that I truly treasure stories with hope.

This show gave me that. I have been doing pretty bad in terms of mental health for months, maybe over a year actually. This was a nice reprieve and I hope the message of the story sticks with me, and that I start 2025 stronger and braver.

[demontobee]

Good Omens is queering TV/storytelling - part 1: GAZE

I would argue that part of why Good Omens is so refreshingly queer is because it does not cater to the male gaze (which centers around the preferences - aesthetic, romantic, sexual, visual, logical, emotional, political ... - of mainly white men in positions of power):

no oversexualization of groups or types of people: Women or characters that could be read as female presenting are not overly sexualized. In fact, some of them are shown to be grimy, slimy and not sexual at all. All of them are real characters and not just cardboard-cutout on-screen versions of male misogynistic fantasies. They portray real people with real people problems. They are human, or exempt from our categories when portraying angels or demons. There are no overly sexualized bodies in general (as has so far also often been the case with young gay men, PoC, etc.), no fetishization of power imbalances, and not exclusively youthful depiction of love and desire.

sex or sexual behavior is not shown directly (yet): All imagery and symbolism of sex and sexuality is used not to entice the audience but is very intimately played out between characters, which makes it almost uncomfortable to watch (e.g., Aziraphale being tempted to eat meat, Crowley watching Aziraphale eat, the whole gun imagery).

flaunting heteronormativity: Throughout GO but especially GO2, there is very little depiction of heterosexual/romantic couples; most couples are very diverse and no one is making a fuss about it. There is no fetishization of bodies or identities. Just people (and angels and demons) being their beautiful selves (or trying to).

age: Even though Neil Gaiman explained that Crowley and Aziraphale are middle-aged because the actors are, I think it is also queering the idea of romance, love and desire existing mainly within youthful contexts. Male gaze has taught us that young people falling and being in love is what we have to want to see, and any depiction of love that involves people being not exactly young anymore is either part of a fetishized power imbalance (often with an older dude using his power to prey on younger folx) or presents us with marital problems, loss of desire, etc. – all with undertones of decay and patronizing sympathy. Here, however, we get a beautifully crafted, slow-burn, and somehow super realistic love story that centers around beings older than time and presenting as humans in their 50s figuring out how to deal with love. It makes them both innocent and experienced, in a way that is refreshing and heartbreaking and unusual and real.

does not (exclusively) center around romantic/sexual love: I don’t know if this is a gaze point exactly but I feel like male gaze and resulting expectations of what a love story should look like are heavily responsible for our preoccupation with romantic/sexual love in fiction – the “boy gets girl” type of story. And even though, technically, GO seems to focus on a romantic love story in the end, it is also possible to read this relationship but also the whole show as centering around a kind of love that goes beyond the narrow confines of our conditioned boxed-in thinking. It seems to depict a love of humanity and the world and the universe and just the ineffability of existence as a whole.

disability as beautiful and innate to existence: Disability is represented amongst angels by the extremely cool Saraqael and by diversely disabled unnamed angels in the Job minisode. Representation of disability is obviously super important in its own right, but is also queers what we perceive as aesthetically and ontologically "normal". Male gaze teaches us that youth and (physical and mental) health are the desirable standard and everything else is to be seen as a deviance, a mistake. By including disability among the angels, beings that have existed before time and space, the show clearly states that disability is a beautiful and innate part of existence.

gender is optional/obsolete: Characters like Crowley, Muriel and others really undermine the (visual and aesthetic) boundaries of gender and the black-and-white thinking about gender that informs male gaze. Characters cannot be identfied simply as (binary) men or women anymore just by looking at them or by interpreting their personalities or behaviors. Most characters in GO, and especially the more genderqueer ones, display a balance of feminine and masculine traits as well as indiosyncracies that dissolve the gender binary.

Feel free to add your own thoughts on this in the comments or tags!

[genderqueerdykes]

radfem reasoning "well men traumatized us so we are allow to hate them" is funny because most of my abusers have been women and you dont see me become a misogynist. like sure feeling unsafe is a thing but violently hating on them is not better. not related but i found the whole thing with "man hating lesbian" whether a joke or not is distasteful and not funny a little bit, because 10 years ago i see lesbians explaining that they just love women, and now "man hating" seeemed to be a requirement for being a lesbian

also, as a queer living in asia, i feel like radfeminism has been weaving its way into our activism. IT WILL NEVER SUCCESS LOOK AT HOW 4B IN KOREA. you cannot "rebrand" radfeminism to "queer friendly 4b" or "tirf/trans inclusive radfems"!!!!! i hate white radfems but it grosses me out most when i see a poc radfem. why are you siding with your oppressors and not your poc queer siblings? given how many america-related things can affect other in the world, i felt like my inside dead as hell when cis american women started posting about 4b. i hate it

ive been thinking about this for a while, too. i'm really glad you pointed this out

"not related but i found the whole thing with "man hating lesbian" whether a joke or not is distasteful and not funny a little bit, because 10 years ago i see lesbians explaining that they just love women, and now "man hating" seemed to be a requirement for being a lesbian,"

especially this. people literally see it as a requirement to be a lesbian. how are people not aware that they're literally being rad fems when doing so? like that's rad feminism not lesbian snap out of it. and even then that shit just doesn't work. it grooms disenfranchised vulnerable women into thinking that they'll get ahead in life by treating men like shit. it's cult shit. it's rad fem shit. it's terf shit

[enbycarp]

Hey all, it's Juneteenth. I feel like this is a good day to talk about folks in prison.

I'm pen pals with several folks in prison. I've been doing this for many years now, and i think it's one of the most important things I've ever done. I started because i was interested in prison abolition, and i was told this was the way to get started in that movement. It's also a way to invest in our communities. Because queer, poc, poor, and disabled communities are disproportionately affected by the industrial prison complex. It's our people who are being thrown into cages and often being forgotten, tortured, enslaved, and denied their rights. We can invest in our communities and participate in mutual aid no matter what our resources or ability levels are. Being a pen pal requires investing a pretty small amount of time and money. Literally, if you can write a letter, you can do it (and often, you can send the letters online, so you don't even need paper).

I have made some true friends as a pen pal. People who have offered me support as much as i have offered them. I have one pen pal who i can talk to about things that i don't talk about with anyone else.

I won't lie, it's not always easy. There have been a couple pen pals that i didn't get along with well. I had to tell them that it wasn't working and gently end our correspondence. I've had two pen pals that stopped writing to me after they got out, and i just have to hope that they're ok out there. And these folks put up with really hard, sometimes horrifying shit inside. It can be hard to process that. Though, I've known other folks with pen pals who clearly set boundaries about what they're comfortable talking about and that's worked for them. I've had a pen pal ask me to do more than i was able to do for them, and i had to tell them no. They understood. You have to be able to set boundaries in any relationship, though.

You get to decide what you can do to help a pen pal. For some of us, that's just writing letters. I sometimes send gifts to folks (mostly books from Amazon). For one of my pen pals, i look up info about magic the gathering or D&D because she plays those games inside. For another, i wrote a letter to help support her case for getting a shorter sentence. One friend likes me to look up facts about his favorite actresses and sports teams. When one friend was facing transphobic discrimination, i organized a call in to the superintendent (and we really helped her). Some pen pals are looking for romantic connections (they generally tell you up front of that's the case). Many queer prisoners just need a connection to their community.

Please at least check out www.blackandpink.org and learn about what being a pen pal can mean for people on the inside. That organization has connected me with several queer pen pals. Even if you're not going to sign up to be a pen pal, just take a few minutes to learn about it.

Thanks!

Ps: you can ask me if you have any questions about

[cinna-wanroll]

The Twinkification of Obi-Wan Kenobi

Hi everyone! I have emerged from the abyss to posit an opinion and analysis about something that has been ongoing in my corner of the fandom for some time now and I just wanted to share my thoughts. Please note that this is not meant to be a call-out post. If you have made references to Obi-Wan being a twink, we are cool, we simply have a difference of opinion! As always this blog is an open space where people from across the fandom are welcomed and loved.

With that being said:

The Co-Opting of "Twink"

It isn't uncommon to come across the term "twink" nowadays while scrolling the social medias. In fact, there are several videos referencing men, both real and fictional, using "twink" as a kind of affectionate endearment.

Is there a big, beefy man who shows his emotions in your favorite TV show? Chances are he has been called a twink.

Looking at a cute post of a straight couple? There is a chance the woman has captioned her post with: I love my twink boyfriend! :)

Is there a trans man on your for you page? Peer in the comments: chances are he, too, has people teeming in his comments to call him a twink.

Let us be clear: this is not what the word "twink" means.

The term "twink" is a queer term that has become so mangled and co-opted by cis, straight people (especially women) that it has become misused across the internet. So what is it, exactly? "Twink" is a queer identifier. Traditionally, the term refers to gay men who are:

Thin

Not very muscular

Not hairy

Young

Of course, there is always room for nuance. Also, there are so many layers to this conversation I have not and will not address fully. However, the main purpose of this conversation is to discuss its relation to Obi-Wan Kenobi.

So You Want to Woobify a Warrior

Most of the time when I see someone refer to Obi-Wan as a twink, it is in reference to mid-thirties, mid or post-war Obi-Wan. I am not going to address sexuality here because I am a firm believer in allowing people their interpretations of characters' sexualities. Instead, here are some photos of Obi-Wan Kenobi during and a bit after the era previously mentioned, and of his actor, Ewan McGregor:

Here are some things of note: Ewan and Obi-Wan are not especially petite. They are muscular, hairy, and visibly middle-aged. Or at least, visibly older than 20s.

In Karen Miller's Wild Space, Bail Organa throws up in his hands out of fear when Obi-Wan is having hallucinations and moves to attack him.

In Christie Golden's Dark Disciple, he punches a droid in the face and it stumbles back.

My point here is that Obi-Wan is intimidating. He underwent years of rigorous training, fought in battle after battle, and is an expert in martial arts. The chances of him escaping that with the appearance of being boyish, early 20s, skinny, and not muscular seem... slim. War does not typically have anti-aging effects.

I once saw someone on this app make a point that because Obi-Wan is portrayed as the more intuitive and emotionally regulated character in contrast to Anakin's brash violence, he is perceived as more feminine. Therefore, he is more "coddleable." And, furthermore, the "feminine" narrative lends itself to the stereotypical parts of the label of twink. (Again, there is a deeper conversation to be had there. I am generalizing).

Unless Obi-Wan has been extensively malnourished, shaved, and de-aged, I don't see sense in seeing him as a twink.

The part of all this with even more implications associated is that I see a lot of this mentioned in relationship to Obi-Wan being in a relationship with Cody. There is a lot of comparison there, usually positioning Cody as the strong, indestructible warrior of whom Obi-Wan is either envious of or saved by. The racist undertones there are infinite and have been addressed and readdressed, especially by POC in the fandom.

Anyways gorgeous people, this concludes my thoughts, as it is very late. I am hoping to be able to participate in Codywan First Kiss Bingo, but I was hit with the flu and have been working diligently to catch up in my uni classes. I love you all and wish you nothing but the best!

[le-trash-prince]

To be blunt on this topic:

I 👏 do 👏 not 👏 care 👏 if 👏 people 👏 don’t 👏 like 👏 a 👏 show! I don’t care if you don’t share my ship or stan my fave! That is not what we are saying!

What I fucking care about is:

Pretending your subjective opinions are objective truth.

Refusing to meet art on its own terms and insisting that if it doesn’t do what you want it to, it is a failure.

Acting like queer Asian shows should prioritize Western tastes—YES, even if you are a POC. We are still Westerners! We still have Western, English-language speaking privilege across the globe, and it would be nice if we could stop acting like everything should be about what we want. I cannot believe how difficult it is for people to understand this point.

Making broad, sweeping claims on what is and isn’t queer. It is valid if you do not feel seen by a piece of queer media. But that does not make it less queer or less meaningful to other queer people. You can dislike a show without making it into the Death of Queer Art. Again, your opinions and feelings are real, but that does not make them objective truth.

Also! The double standard of “I’ve seen an increasing number of posts on BL tumblr lately” without mentioning what those specifics are just so that you can just make up what stance those people had. But if other people reference multiple posts without linking or tagging anyone, they are being rude and vague posting instead of, I don’t know, airing out their thoughts on their own blog.

People are not going to remember every post they see and bookmark it in case they come up with a response later. Not everything has to be a dialogue! We do not actually owe anyone a conversation.

I have said it before and I will say it again, but the majority of people complaining about holier-than-thou criticism on BL tumblr lately are actual queer creatives who wish people could approach a story on its own terms. Pretending like that makes us capitalists just to make us look absurd is a take and there’s a reason so many people had something to say about it.

[aspirin82]

Yesterday, I watched the Spiderverse (2023) for the third time just for Hobie Brown. And I noticed something.

Nearly all of the Spider people has red in their design, (Gwen being an exception) but since they never exist in a fully red enviroment and the way other colors are used in their design, it never looks "way too red". But hey, guess which show has characters with dominant red colors? Hazbin Hotel. So I decided to compare the way colors are used in them.

See where Im getting? In these shots, the characters always pop out from the background because of the way lighting and backgrounds are used. Yet it never looks eye straining despite the colors are very vibrant.

And another problem I wanted to talk about, in Spiderverse, the colors are used to represent emotions and they do this pretty well. The first scene where Gwen hugs her dad has a really soothing and nice vibe, which its probably how Gwen feels too at the very moment. The second scene, well I actually didnt get to watch that scene so I dont remember the context crystal clear but its when Miles gets sent to the other universe, where he gets tied to the punching bag by the other Miles. The scene is primarily red to show the danger and threat. This is how well the color red is used in Spiderverse. Its special and they saved it for these kind of scenes.

Now, for Hazbin Hotel.. Hmm, I guess the color red is special in this show too. The characters all have red, white and black in their designs with some of them having a little bit of yellow. Maybe use some cool colors to balance that like they did in Spiderverse? Or dont put your characters in red enviroments unless its necessary to show a certain emotion or mood? Its always the same tone of red used in every scene and every character, its looking bad and unorganized.

You dont need to make the Hell all red to show its Hell? If you wanna keep that, then design your characters with different colors so they can stand out from the background. Otherwise, youre gonna end up having these clustred images.

And another thing Hazbin Hotel needs to learn from Spiderverse is designing POC. Spiderverse has a really diverse cast of characters with all kinds of different personalities. It doesnt have any stereotypes unlike Hazbin and has great written poc characters like Miles, Hobie, Miguel, Jessica and so much more. ALSO surprisingly, despite Spiderverse not having any canonic queer character, with the "Protect trans kids" poster in Gwen's house, I think it also has better queer represantation than Hazbin too lol. It was pretty casual, not forced or anything stereotypical, it was just there. I just love the theory that the Peter Parker in Gwen's universe may be trans, which it makes sense for me.

So yeah folks, thats pretty much it. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

XOXO 💋💋 HUGS!! ^_^ :3

[dykeomania]

lovergirl!hazel headcanons

｡.｡ just some evidence of a love that transcends hunger, tbh.

a/n: i needed a break from writing a fic and wanted to write something sappy. this is the something sappy in question. wanted it to give how-you-become-hazel's-lover -> what she does when you're actually her lover vibe but it just got real mushy. i like it. i hope you like it, too. proofread, but i'm blind as fuck + i'm rusty, so.

tags: gender neutral (i think. i may have fucked up once or twice. please correct me if i did, i proofread fr fr over time. not intended for cis men), body neutral, and poc friendly. some niche reader things (tarot mention, reader wears makeup). mild nsfw -- kissing, making out, heavy petting. almost third base. starts in high school, ends in college.

practice fanfic etiquette. please don't plagiarize or repost my stuff.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who sits up straight on the edge of your bathtub and looks up at you in complete awe when you're getting ready. she's got the dumbest, most lovesick puppy look in her eyes as she watches her lover line her lips, and apply a sheer coat of gloss on top. when they turn around to ask if it's even, hazel smiles so wide that it makes the apples of her cheeks sore.

she doesn't really know if it looks okay, she just knows that she wants to kiss you.

she only manages an mhm because it's what you want from her and, well.. at this point, hazel's convinced that she'd drop just about everything to give whatever you want.

you snicker, closing the space between you in slow and steady strides. "what are you looking at, huh?" you teases, grin stretched across lips lined nude, gleaming pink.

"mmm..." hazel can't help but like, drunklenly (she's dead sober).. haphazardly loop you in by the belt loop, head tilting easily to the right. "yyyyyou."

her eyes droop as she falls victim to the familiar spell that you cast over her. one that starts with you taking her face in her hands, and bringing yourself close enough for to take in all at once. she's made dizzy by the smell of your conditioner, made defenseless by the familiar trace of your body wash radiating off of your skin.

"what're you looking at me for?" you grin, your hands hot on her cheeks as you stand between her legs.

"why wouldn't i wanna look at you?" hazel gently manages, hand finding comfortable purchase on your hips. she grips gently with admiration, fingertips pressing into sacred flesh of something, someone, who she couldn't believe is hers. "you're just so pretty."

but let's take a few steps back first,

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who meets you purely by coincidence. you don't go to fight club, and you don't do cheer. you don't have any classes together, you hardly even know of each other. you do, however, have to work concessions for football together one night.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who doesn't talk much, and honestly standing next to you feels kinda stupid with the bruise that she has on her cheek. she usually never really cares and she's usually super talkative -- she doesn't talk much because well.. she doesn't really know.. how to. how to talk to pretty people -- well, it's not like she finds you pretty, it's just.. anyways,

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who makes some dumb joke about athletes and you kind of snort.. and she's immediately charmed. hazel callahan who has a desire to keep you entertained, and continues to do so throughout the remainder of the game.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who actually is in your class, but, neither of you just really noticed. hazel callahan who sits next to you in the weeks following. who spends her free periods with you. who eats lunch with you. who eventually gets around to telling you about fight club, over turkey and rye sandwiches.

"so you just, like..." you take a break from chewing, tonguing some bread out of your back molar. "punch the shit out of each other, and it's school-sponsored?"

"...well, yeah. but in like a self-defense, queer way. bring people together, create some solidarity. a safe-space on campus for queer community, kind of thing."

"oh okay, so like, in a slay way," you revise.

hazel stares. scoffing out a gentle laugh. "uh... yeah.." hazel furrows her brows, shaking her head. "um.. what does that.. what does that, like, mean?"

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who becomes your best friend.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who really likes you. like, as a person.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who likes you maybe a little bit too much.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who doesn't know how to embroider, so when you embroidered her converse -- creating a wreath of vines, speckled with bright little flowers around the all star symbol -- she was so happy. but she felt so bad because she didn't know how to repay you.

"let me make it up to you?" she insists, fingers playing with your own, but not creating enough distraction to prevent you from protesting.

"what?" you scoff, subconsciously locking her hands with yours, as though you're about to declare a thumb war. "no, how?"

"i don't know! this is so nice, let me like..." hazel shrugs voice dropping timidly, "..take you out or something."

a beat passes, one that feels like forever. a large enough one to create space for all the butterflies to rumble around both of your stomachs, and for the elephant to pass through the room. hazel can't tell if it's your hand that's begun to sweat in your grasp, or if it's hers.

your eyes narrow at her, grin stretched into something cheshire as you shake your hand, and hers. "i think you just wanna take me out on a date."

hazel smiles sheepishly, cheeks flushing a bright flamingo. she shrugs, next words quiet and intentional,

"so what if i do?"

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan doesn't know how to embroider but she does have an eye for wildflowers. when the girl who shows up at your doorstep, it's with a dorky smile, a batch of spring, and a bandaid wrapped around her index finger and her thumb. the flowers that she biked about an hour north to pluck -- from a field she discovered after having simply gone too far -- are bunched together and wrapped in a trader joe's paper bag, the kind that her mom always leaves in the kitchen under the sink. she put the boquet together herself. spent too much time thinking about whether or not you would like the arrangement or the colors, probably went to the store to grab a few of your favorite flowers that she couldn't find.

"oh, these are for you. see, i tried to make this whole thing, like.. semi.. transactional. again, like, i don't really know how to embroider flowers, or like anything really, so... these were next best thing, i guess." she offers, as though it's nothing.

"you look.. really nice." hazel's eyes linger, stricken and dumb. she fills her lungs with air, huffing out her next sentence. "are yoooouuu.. ready to go?"

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who thinks that star signs mean nothing, and doesn't know jackshit about crystals or anything of the like. but hazel callahan who is all eyes and ears, criss-cross-apple-sauce with you on her floor, as she watches you knock your knuckles on a deck of tarot cards and shuffle through them for what you called a "semi unreliable, two-card reading."

hazel callahan who jumps a little when two cards fly out from the deck. who furrows her eyebrows when you turn the over. an the lovers and two of cups, both upright.

"what..." she snorts. "what does that mean?"

"um.." she watches you blush. "it means.." and she blushes when your eyes linger on hers, and then look up. feels her stomach flutter when she watches you take a deep breath in through your nose, like you're shuffling through all of the words in your head.

"...let's just saaaaayyyy... nnnew connections might be coming your way, soon."

hazel has no fucking idea what that means, looking at you, she surely could hope that that's true.

...

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who is shocked that you want to like.. have a sleepover with her. this doesn't really happen to her. like at all. but it's happening with you, so she's down.. but it has to be planned. hazel callahan pulls out all the stops to try to make sure that it's.. well, perfect, she guesses? she makes sure that it's on a weekend where her mom is out of town (not even because she wants to do anything but you know how her mom is). she asks you what all of your favorite snacks are beforehand, and offers to go get more if you run out. she makes sure that you have satin pillowcases if you have textured hair, just in case you forget a bonnet, or anything. probably does that regardless of whether or not that's applicable to you, because she hears it's better for your skin and what not. she gets a weighted blanket for you and some extra pillows + takes out an extra throw if she knows that you get cold easily, or damn near strips her bed down to just one comforter and gets a desk fan to face her bed if she knows that you get too hot.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who you create a shared movie list with, and who will sit with you and watch all of your favorite movies. all of your least favorite movies. will watch movies that you insist that she must see and will do so with very little fight because it's whatever you want, really. hazel callahan who is very quickly realizing that she would do whatever you wanted, as long as it meant that it got you to smile.

ღ*♡∞:���.｡ (hazel callahan who, granted, talks through a lot of those fucking movies. like. hazel callahan who has a really fucking hard time paying attention to movies.)

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who clearly has overthought everything. who laughs at and understands all of your dumb jokes and is always a little shocked when you laugh at hers. who lets you rest your head on her shoulder when you watch movies in her home-theater. who lays with you in her bed and compares your tiktok for you page with hers and finds it a little too easy to poke fun of you. finds it not as easy to remain calm when your head rests comfortably on her chest, and thus hopes to god that all of the cringy tiktok audios are masking the sound of her heart beating out of her chest.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who looks at you when you mention that it's getting late, and insists that there's a guest room if you wanna sleep in there, or an air mattress that she was supposed to blow up.

"it's too late for that, though." you frown.

"no," hazel, being hazel, is quick to reassure, shaking her head. "no, no, i could totally blow it up. we have an automated pump, it'll take like 20 minutes."

"mm, i don't know, it's still kinda late for all of that..."

hazel blinks at you. her eyebrows raise, corners of her lips gently upturning. "okay. i mean, do you wanna take the guest room?"

you look up at her, eyes big on purpose. "that guest room's kinda scary." you lift a brow. "it's dark. and cold."

hazel thinks she might.. be tripping. she has to be. her blink is slow, and her face knots together, and releases -- the way it does when she gets all timid and indecisive. "o..kay..." she grins nonetheless, furrowing her eyebrows. "so then .. where are you gonna sleep?"

"..i mean.." you burn, and so does she. "...i could just sleep here with you?"

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who can't help but feel girlish and vulnerable laying in her bed with you, her stomach tied in knots over how there is nothing usual about this situation. fully seeing you in your pajamas. feeling the gentle flesh of your bare calves rub against hers. being within such close proximity of you that she can still smell the lingering remnants of soap on your skin from your shower.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who dares to let her finger dance on your upper bicep, but that's just about it, really.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who only nudges closer only when you nudge closer. who only lowers her voice, when you lower your voice. who only holds eye contact when you start it, but is always the first to look away.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who falls into a trap: eye contact held after some conversation that did not, and does not matter. she follows your eyes down, chocolate eyes focusing on the arch of your cupids bow. she does tilt her head up to find her nose nudging softly against the underside of yours. she doesn't know how you two got this close. hazel callahan who feels her hands grow sweaty, feeling your breath linger over her the chap of her lips. who nearly stiffens when she feels your hand press into her back, but instead arches into the crevice your body makes and presses her palm against your hip.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who does what she thinks she's supposed to do, and kisses you -- soft and gentle, like the whispers that fluttered over both of your lips earlier. brief, and endearing.

her lips stick to yours, and then her lips press into yours. and then her lips open when yours do, and her hand tightens on you when yours does.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who has no fucking idea what she's doing. like, seriously. she kind of knows -- i mean, okay, yeah, she knows how to kiss, but this is, like.. not just a kiss. hazel's kisses are brief. gentle, maybe a little slow. never this deep. hazel callahan who forgets herself when her fingers weave through your hair. hazel callahan who doesn't recognize the way her breath shakes in your throat when your fingers ambitiously sift through her thick, black locks and pull.

hazel callahan whose lips slot over yours, and unlock. who leans forward when you lean back, and is almost nearly on top of you.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who doesn't know what to do with her hand, so she puts it everywhere. glides it over your side, presses it over the expanse of your lower back. who smooths her hand under your shirt and marvels in the way your skin burns against her palm. who itches to explore, traversing over your stomach, venturing up, up, and up--

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who stops dead in her tracks when you hum something sour in her mouth and grab her wrist. who looks at you stunned with parted lips as you softly shake your head against hers.

"not yet," you pant, opening your eyes to look at her. "not yet."

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who bats her lashes, dizzy with affection yet sobered from your action. she knows how you sound. not like you're rejecting her, but like you're admitting something, which you.. might be. something that she understands. regardless, she understands.

but she burns bright with embarrassment, stomach rattling with a guilt that crawls up her throat and wraps around it, tightening and tightening...

"yeah," she manages a whispers after a while. somehow, it's still raspy. "yeah, okay.."

"okay.."

"...m'sorry--"

"don't be," you shake your head. "keep kissing me."

you rush, and it's kind of just in time. whatever stinging was lingering in her chest subsides as you bring yourself closer, lips softly capturing her lower lip in affirmation after hazel just stares at you.

hazel callahan who blinks, oscillating between consciences, dazed and a little confused. she's cautious and readjusted, her hand only lingering over your side as she whispers a faint "are you sure..?"

the sentence dissolves when on the tip of hazel's tongue when her lips find yours again, at your action, which is her answer. hazel callahan who listens. who lets you take her hand and place it somewhere that feels more comfortable, somewhere that's right and yet still sensual.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who is wiped, but intentional with every kiss that either you or her leads, every swipe of her lips over your jaw, every tender kiss that you let her place against the stretch of your neck.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who will admire within her bounds. kissing you, and drowning in you until she is simply too sleepy to continue. until she is dizzy and feels comfortable enough to nuzzle her face somewhere into the crook of you, breathing you in until you become a part of her dreams,

and she will wake -- in the morning, and in the middle of the night -- only to have a hard time believing that she isn't still dreaming.

...

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who kind of has to get used to.. all of it. who crushes, even though she's already "achieved," so to speak. who grins at her phone when she's texted, who finds any excuse to facetime you and keep you on the line -- sometimes just so that she can look at you. who finds any excuse to be around you.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who you can't get rid of once you go both go to college. who facetimes you whenever, who visits you on weekends. who comes into your space and steals all of your sweatshirts and your pajama pants and of course, all of your spare time.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel "no, i can make that for you" callahan who can't embroider, but can crochet. she will buy you that jellycat that you really want, a hundred percent. hazel callahan will also greet you with a fucked up rendition of said stuffed animal that you wanted (giving jamdog, perhaps) and furrows her eyebrows when you have to hide your laugh with your hand.

"what?" she asks, grin dulling only for a moment. "do you not like it?"

"no it's--" you cover your mouth. "it's perfect." you cackle. when you cup her cheeks, all the worry and fear of judgement fades. sort of. at least enough. "you're perfect, babe. i love it."

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who does, in fact, keep a picture in her wallet of her lover, ready at all times. hazel callahan who weaves her lover into casual conversation.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who still doesn't really understand figure of speech all that well so when you say things like "i wish you could just come over," she literally goes "..well like, i could,"

and then proceeds to make like, a three hour drive.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who keeps the picture that you hate of yourself as her lockscreen and it's not to spite you, it's because she thinks you're beautiful, and she has no idea what you're talking about.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who figures out what names you like to be called by throwing everything at a wall and seeing that sticks. pretty. handsome. lover. angel. baby. and when she does find one, one that makes you blush just about as hard as she does every time you even look in her direction, she holds it over your head to high heavens. makes it your contact name. uses it to punctuate reassuring sentences, when she greets you, when she tells you goodnight.

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who gets to take you on real dates, and gets excited to. who gets giddy when you get ready. who gets to fix your hair and come up behind you when you take mirror selfies once you're finished. who now feels comfortable enough to place her hands at the mid-point of your waist and let them venture toward your frontside while she rests her chin on your shoulder, and leans in to kiss your cheek. who tells you you smell nice, and makes you smile when she buries her face into some part of you and literally just goes rahhhh!!!!

ღ*♡∞:｡.｡ hazel callahan who is also stuck sometimes, in moment such as these, watching the wonder who she has had a crush on since high school -- jesus, has it really been that long? -- with gentle eyes and a completely disarmed disposition.

hazel callahan who is honestly such a fucking loser -- like, literally, loser-since-birth, no-hope-since-middle-school, gay-haircut-and-new-repotoire-can't-save-you, loser, and can't help but ponder and marvel over how someone like you is in her hands. in her face. in her life.

"m'not that pretty," you insist, fingers weaving through her hair, nails etching at hazel's scalp in a way that hazel has grown to like. love, even.

her eyes flicker over your face, smile lopsided and eyes heavy like despite everything, you don't even know the half of it. she scoffs, voice hardly above a whisper,

"yeah no, you are so much more than pretty."