#so it goes here!
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HOLD ME, HAND. a handmade Renchanting zine by me! Transcripts, and image descriptions under the cut. Experience it on my website! (Transcripts inline on there.)








Pictured is the cover and back cover of the zine. The back cover is the same style scribbled black vertical line, but less dense, and with a streak of red scribbled lines towards the top half of the page.
Page 1 and 2 of the zine. On the left, the page behind the cover, has a crude drawing of the Dogwarts banner in red pen. It is an almost fully red banner with three white triangles at the bottom edge. The text on the side of the page, written along the side edge, says “a hand made Renchanting zine by SBY.” Renchanting is in red text, as is SBY. SBY is circled like a signature. On page two, there is a poem, titled “how it ends”, aligned left, in plain black text. It says; Let’s try this again: You go into fruitless labor for fruitless/business for fruitless prizes in fruitless/games. No winning here, there is none./I know that. I see it. I’ve seen it all ahead/of time, I see it clearly now. Play/stupid games, play stupid pretend. No/winning. I know. But this time I’ll play along, stupid games./This time, I’ll climb up the hill and see/you there, and walk the other/way. I’ll know better. I’ll leave you to it. A gentle/nod. Magic can’t save us, in the end./Love can’t mean anything if I know -how it ends.
Pages 3 and 4 of the zine. On the left page, page 3, is a poem written diagonally down the page. Once in black, then repeated in red. It is titled “on you.”/”(on you)” and the title is both on top and on the bottom of the poem to be read with the rest. The poem reads, “on you. drawn to you like gravity draws the axe to meet its mark (on you). drawn to you like gravity draws the axe to meet its mark” On page 4, on the right, is a sketchy drawing of a handaxe, colored in slightly with blue pen and red hearts scribbled around the sharp end of the axe instead of blood. On the handle, all caps cut off text reads, “Red winter is-”
Pages 5 and 6 of the zine are in all black ink. This is a two page spread of a poem titled “puppy love”. The title is horizontal down the middle spine. On the bottom half, under the large block of poem text, is drawn the roots and trunk of a tree. On the top half, on the right page, above the text, is drawn the top half of the same tree. The text on the left reads, “I don’t fully understand what it is/about you that makes me want to/run and hide under the tall dark/oaks. Something about you makes/me scared like a child, not devoted/to some thing or another. Or another/thing. I don’t fully understand what/it is that makes my heart tug and/beat when someone else is near you./Like something or another, pulling/me closer.” The text on the bottom half of page 6 reads, “I don’t need to understand what it is/about you that makes me want to put the/wooden handle in your firm calloused hands./The hands I held in mine, planting row/after row of garden in the soil in/front of the shack your calloused hands/helped build, behind the walls your hands/helped me build. I feel it too. So I’m/putting this in your hands, now."
Pages 7 and 8 of the zine. On the right is a crude drawing of a red crescent moon with three black birds in front of it. On the right is a poem titled, “be still, be ready (steady)”. The title is written vertically on the middle spine again. In red pen, complementing the black ink text of the poem is a scribbled red cloud and red snowflakes. The poem reads: and with the palpitations in/my throat i finally/understood what it would/feel like to eat a/heart while it was still/beating. i’m holding your heart in my hands/and swallowing it whole./you asked me to, and now i am, i’m/swallowing you whole.
Pages 9 and 10 are a mostly white page space two page spread of black lowercase text, that simply reads, very spread out, on a top left to bottom right diagonal, “oh./i understand,/now.”
Pages 11 and 12 of the zine are the first part of a four page spread of one poem meant to be read from left to right ignoring the middle spine. There is a long arrow at the cutoff at the end of the page, indicating that the poem continues. It is in black ink and says; The wagon jumps --- not for joy. Executioner’s boots squeal/at the same frequency of the damn wheels creak. The same joy/peverted [sic]. I never understood an axe until I became one./Sharpen me,/deep repetitive motion, make me feel/good. How I touch/the scar around your neck and know/I made it --- mine, mine. I smell bile/feel it in my throat too, and/I look up to see one of the men,/big and strong framed/an ox/of a man and gentle like one Pages 13 and 14, continuing the 4 page spread. The rest of the text says; has thrown up onto the road. Leaving it/pieces of him in our wake. I don’t throw up/even if I feel like/I left myself somewhere else. Becoming the axe, becoming the axe. Long road home/to take it back. Bury me/in someone else’s/hand. The title of the poem is revealed on the bottom right of the last page; “Long Live the King”. Above it is a drawing of an open eye and a closed eye in red ink.
#renchanting#treebark#trafficshipping#fandom zine#3rd life#martyn inthelittlewood#rendog#debated whether to put this on my art blog but there's more writing#so it goes here!#at some point ill make it look good on the site but for now itll do#poetry
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missed the mark by (looks at calendar) uhhh. hm. but I really wanted to do something for the 5th anniversary! happy five years to these idiots 🎉
#art#twisted wonderland#twst 5th anniversary#i'll stop for a while now i promise i just wanted to get this out#genuinely feels a bit weird to be 5 years in already huh!#that combined with having finally finished up episode 7...#oh no all the milestones hit at once help#hold on while i reminisce for a moment#because MAN i did not expect the anime disney boy game to become so special to me#(especially my little wet rat dragon and his family)#to be fair 2020 onward was uhhh let's say prime timing for a piece of silly and unapologetically indulgent media#(not to get too real here or anything but let's just say that. some of the stuff in 7 specifically did hit a bit harder than it should've.)#but also just. you know how it goes.#sometimes a thing doesn't so much speak to you as it reaches out and grabs you by the throat#with an intensity that shocks and bewilders no one more than you#and sure you can ignore it because having any emotions about media beyond faint scorn is of course the epitome of ~cringe~#but you could also just throw yourself wholeheartedly into it#and lemme tell you one of those options is a hell of a lot more fun#idk i'm just kinda rambling here#it's been a weird five years but i'm glad to have had these guys for it#and hey if nothing else it gave us meleanor#the inside of my brain at any given point is just the 'do it for her' meme covered in pictures of our late great dragon princess#i would not have it any other way
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#castlevania#alucard#alucard castlevania#trevor belmont#sypha belnades#dracula#dracula castlevania#trephacard#this is doin numbers on twit and bsky so here it goes too
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★
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#There’s clearly a theme in my writing here#It’s okay they usually get a hug at the end or something :)#The extremely angsty wip with whump I’m working on rn goes so hard just you guys fucking wait#fandom memes#whump community#whump#lemonwrap’s misc tag
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oh, whatever. here, have my fav gf fanart i’ve done
this was made back in october, but i still very much like it so imma put this here as well.
#gf#gravity falls#billford#stanford pines#bill cipher#MY ART WOO#sorry for the annoyingly placed watermark folks#can’t risk having my artwork stolen MORE#this damn piece over here took me 3 hours; which is a LARGE amount of time for me#i originally uploaded this to pinterest; but i guess the site’s art-stealing reputation wasn’t wrong cuz it got stolen.#TO TUMBLR. that’s like— the opposite of how it usually goes!#insane. wildin even#so i’ll upload this here to finally fulfill its destiny of being on tumblr
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Jason, who is constantly making death jokes, and gets back a "dgaf" kind of answers from his siblings. Which he is... used to. Firstly, because it is what siblings supposed to do, be mean to each other, and secondly, because... they are not wrong. His death didn't mean anything. No one cared much about him dying. Yes, they were bothered that he died - a kid, a son and a brother, had died. Everyone mourns dead kids, he wasn't special. Right?
So, he is fine with whatever he gets from his brothers. He often laughs back, even his laughter sounds far too strained to his ears. But, honestly, whatever! It is fine!
Until once, it isn't.
Maybe it is just a bad day. Or maybe his death anniversary is getting closer, and he gets more anxious. Nonetheless, he makes another joke - something about warehouses and crowbars; so, nothing new - and gets a usual funny-snappy reply back, something along the lines And no one cared. And he just huffs, his smile turning to a scowl, and before he can take it back, he shrugs.
'I know.'
Suddenly, it is too quiet in the room. And suddenly everyone is staring - confused, hurt, slightly surprised, even. Jason tries to laugh it off, to make them stop looking at him with so much pity, but his forced laughter sounds too much like a certain clown's in his insane, tired mind, and he ends up murmuring a haste farewell, before practically running away from the cave.
He thinks someone tries to call him back, but he ignores it.
The defeating silence and the looks of pity haunt him in his dreams for the rest of the night.
#does it haunt him that no one answered back immediately something against it too? probably#i just saw the meaniest joke about his death for no reason in internet with a 'drag his ass' comment following it and so here it goes#let the boy cope with his death by jokes why you all try to shut him up omg#jason todd#red hood#dcu comics#dc universe#dcu#batman#batfamily#batfam
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though the movie might be cancelled, yuri on ice will live forever in our hearts. thank you yoi fandom, it's been real ♡
#yuri on ice#yoiedit#yoi#victuuri#ice adolescence#anime gif#*gifs#animangahive#dailyshounenai#userkarura#usergojoana#userhanyi#useralphonse#usertorichi#usermoonz#usericybtch#userheidi#usergokalp#userartless#homuras#himawaari#this is not goodbye this is still my house!!!#devastated but not surprised tbh but i still wanted to channel my emotions somehow and just. express how much this show means to me so here#this thank you goes out to u guys. the fandom#mappa can eat a brick btw <3#god i wish i could articulate just how special yoi is to me#it truly resonated with me like very few other pieces of media have (i can count them with one hand in fact)#it was sooooo revolutionary and ahead of its time not just in terms of queerness but also in terms of mental health#it truly changed me as a person and i just. really appreciate how earnest and kind it was above all#thank you yoi. you will be a part of me forever <3
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The story of Ballora in FNAF..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#ballora#ms afton#william afton#fnaf sister location#silent hill#silent hill 2#MRS AFTON FINALLY MENTIONED AND DESIGNED!! 🔥🔥#I wish I was playing the silent hill 2 remake#but it’s so expensive in Canada rn lmao maybe if it goes on sale#BUT the Maria/mary comparison to Ballora/Mrs Afton is a cool one..#cause I think definitely Ballora is inspired by Ms Afton here#the thing Ballora says and sings about is so directed at William#I gotta know there’s some connection there#and in a way we could see that Ballora is an idealized version of his wife#something he can control with more ease#I HOPE truly yall like Mrs Afton’s design too#I’ll hopefully draw her a lil more from now on 🩵
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I've never been explicit about this because I'm a Fandom Old, and back in the day it was simply understood that anything on the Internet was fair game to do with what you wish, but: if you see a story of mine out there and you like it, download it. Fuck if I care. Keep it for yourself, distribute it to friends, print copies for yourself and your friends, mail it to people, I don't give a shit. As long as you're not exchanging money, I couldn't care less. And tbh you should be doing this with all fanfics you love - print them, save them, put them on a flash drive or a hard drive or share them with friends, whatever. Fanfic authors these days are really fucking precious about their fics, but honestly we're probably going to start seeing queer art being disappeared (especially in the US under the next president) so do whatever you can to archive the things you love to read. Even if that means just printing them out and sticking them in a binder for yourself to read as a bedtime story.
#imp speaks#goes for other stories too but i'm a fanfic author on here so#and yeah i have a million other things that are making me sick to my stomach rn that are more important#but the idea of my gay fanfic living on even if the original copies get disappeared from where i uploaded them#and passed around to others to read#is a nice thought
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they are so important to me
#core younger sibling memory right here#ahsoka tano#anakin skywalker#i have so many feelings#that will never be articulated. and shall exist in brain purgatory forever#kieran goes insane again#aviiart#star wars#the clone wars#tcw#aw man wtf am I gonna say to my calc teacher now... sorry I didn't finish my work I was busy drawing star wars fanart 😀
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suck the dick that pisses on you or whatever the saying is
#eff barks#piss kink got me in a chokehold and it ain’t ever letting go#i think i need to reeeeally make an actual pinned#post so people know what the hell goes on here#i forget not everyone has followed me through 30495 blogs#BUT IF YOU HAVE!!!! hi!! hey honey :) I’m really looking forward to our wedding day#I’m in the bath and i would like someone to walk in#piss on me then force me under the water to clean it off#sigggghhhh
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buckle up lads we're going BACK INTO THE BOOK
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#(the origin of halloween huh) (oooh)#why yes i did wake up way too early to watch the stream and will have no memory of drawing this later#anyway THE MAGIC BOOK IS BACK TO EAT US ONCE AGAIN!!!!#this does make things make a lot more sense if it doesn't have to. y'know. actually take place in the established world#like how jack and sally are apparently just gonna be THERE as themselves WHY NOT#i'm certainly not complaining mind you#scully looks like he's gonna be super adorable and i love him already#spooky scary skeleman who just goes :O a lot and is excited for halloween#he seems like he might actually be more of a fusion of jack and sally? or maybe i'm just reading too much into it#still getting jazzy vibes off of him though. is not scully j graves an incredible jazz musician name.#does this open up the possibility that the last time we went into the book there was a sexy anime boy stitch just offscreen the whole time#...maybe some things are best left uncontemplated#god everyone in this event looks fantastic i'm so glad i saved up some keys after all#a little sad that there's no lilia but you know what the fact that a halloweentown malleus exists is still pretty dang good#and sebek's hat is SO tall#the biggest hat for the loudest boy#i hope oogie is here too i need him and jamil to meet#i need jamil to be faced with a guy who's just a bunch of bugs standing on each other's shoulders in a trenchcoat#i am not coherent right now i just needed to get this out before i go pass out again
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Naruto e Sasuke ✨ { Die with a Smile } Bruno Mars & Lady Gaga
#sns#narusasu#sasunaru#naruto#sasuke#not my art but I did put all together#so it goes on here#narusasunaru#sasunarusasu
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more goofy-silly sabokoby ☺️
#one piece#sabo#koby#sakoboby#sabokoby#i like to think this is what predates my fox and the hound sabokoby…#in theory. its goes:#koby captures sabo. he reaps the reward and praise from the marines. he’s not too worried bc luffy will come#koby won’t have to watch them execute another one of luffys brothers. luffy will save him#and he’s waiting. and waiting. and then a marine says something like ‘hope we can actually kill this guy without straw hat#or one of his friends showing up’#and in the last minutes. it hits koby that’s HES the friend. isn’t he. he’s luffys friend whos supposed to save sabo. so he does. yippee#and stuff happens idk. luffys chilling tho. he’s like ‘nah he’ll be fine. koby is there’#also i want sabo to kiss koby on the execution platform but that is neither here nor there#i love you tumblr tags. thanks for listening to me
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This is also a bit of a culture query, cos these are all in my house so I genuinely cook with these all (except chicken salt, that's been in my cupboard for ages)
But I'm not from the USA and most people here are, so I wonder if that's similar! Maybe your cupboard is identical to mine. Maybe we use the same stuff but call it something else. Maybe USA has a different relationship with pre mix spices and you use none of it. Maybe you've never heard of pre mix spices. I dunno. That's why I'm asking!
I use plain herbs and spices as well. Especially when making a complex meal I'll do it myself. But I use pre mixes other times, so I'm voting. Voting for a pre mix doesn't mean you don't also use paprika! If you genuinely have no pre mixes in the kitchen tho, then hell yeah, tell me!
Also, I know I haven't listed everything in the world. One, that's impossible. Two, this is a bit of a culture thing so I just checked my kitchen and used those. This selection is representative of me only
(you don't have to be from the USA to vote, obvs, we just all know that's how the results will end up. Please tell me about your spice mixes in other countries!!)
Morrison spice blend: Pepper, tumeric, ginger, cardamom, parsley, salt
Chinese five spice: Star anise, cinnamon, clove, fennel, Sichuan pepper
Chicken salt: Salt, chicken stock, garlic, paprika, pepper, onion, celery
Gluhwein gewurz: Orange peel, cinnamon, lemon peel, star anise, hibiscus, clove
Chimichurri: parsley, garlic, oregano, vinegar, chilli, salt, pepper
Za'atar: thyme, cumin, coriander, sesame seeds, sumac, salt, chilli
Garam masala: coriander, cumin, cardamom, cloves, pepper, cinnamon, nutmeg
#food mention#poll#polls#spices#cooking#my gut instinct says I'm going to be told about some seasonal pumpkin spice blend for the next week#but we don't have that here so I'm not preempting and it's not going on the poll#that a regional thing! that's not in Australia! I'm standing my ground#and hey maybe I'll be wrong#if you're interested i use zaatar more than anything else#it's gentle#goes well in breakfast food when I'm cooking lazy
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