#so it gets annoying having people try to talk this way to me when i don't want it.
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infrunami ⎠jeon jungkook
summary: youâve made great friends throughout the years but none like jeon jungkook. heâs there for you when you need him and although at times when things get complicated between your feelings and thoughts⌠thereâs one thing for certain. you both have been wasting time acting like thereâs nothing between you.
⎠genre/au: friends to lovers. y/n[afab, she/her] x best friend jungkook
⎠18.7k
warnings: smut. f2l. slice of life. besties jk and y/n. slight jealousy vibes. idiots to lovers. lot of sexual tension. everyone knows they like each other. for the smut [no protection sorry yall]. heavy makeout. slight dry humping. grinding. doggy style. soft dom vibes jk. whiny y/n. jk gets jealous but never admits it. they both talk to other people bc theyâre in denial.
song inspo: infrunamiâsteve lacy, my kind of womanâmac de marco, no. 1 party anthemâarctic monkeys, love betweenâkali uchis
Friendships in your twenties, youâve learned, come in various forms.
There were people youâve known since you were a teen and people youâve only just met. Some who know everything about you and some who only get a piece of you. Youâve got the ones you meet up with on a random Thursday to run an errand because you haven't seen each other in so longâand you have the ones who seem to always be knocking on your door. Having people who wanted to be around you was one of the best things youâve ever experienced.
âYouâre late.â
He raised his shoulders in a shrug as he picked up the helmet that was strapped onto the back of a black motorcycle, âIâm here, arenât I?â
Part of you gave up on acting upset as you let him slip the helmet over your head. You took his backpack off his shoulders and shoved your things inside before putting it on your back.
âThanks for the ride,â You hooked a leg over the seat, straddling the bike as you fixed yourself up behind him. The helmet fit snugly around your head and you held him around the waist comfortably, âIâll buy you a meal.â
âYou promise?â Jungkook asked with a teasing smile as he kicked up the stand and brought the engine to life, âIâm craving steak.â
âJust donât break my pocket,â You patted him softly, checking your phone one last time, âI swear if they donât give me my car back Iâm going to throw a fit.â
âMaybe next time donât park in a restricted area,â He said lastly, driving off with youn. Your friendship with Jungkook was different from the others. He was your best friend.
Not in the way Mirae was or even Taehyung but he was up there. Heâs the one youâd have knocking on your door because heâs bored or bothering you during the middle of the night. Heâs also the one you call because you know heâll answer.
You donât remember exactly how you two met but it was some time during college, an after party maybe? Campus? Not likely. He was infamous for never showing up. Whatever, it was beyond the point. The point is that somewhere along the way you made friends with an overly clingy man who spent too much time at the gym or gaming in his bedroom when he wasnât at work.
No, youâre not dating him nor do you want to. Heâs kind of just⌠your overly good looking friend who would do anything for you.
âI forgot my lunch at home so Iâm starving,â Jungkook pushed past you to get inside the small barbecue place he dragged you to. You couldnât help but roll your eyes and follow. Heâs taken his backpack back to set it on the chair next to his and you sat across from him. It was a familiar place to eat and the menus took up an unnecessary amount of space so he took them both without question.
âWhat if I wanted to try something new?â You asked with a slight scoff, pretending to be annoyed but he saw right through it.
âYou donât, youâre too picky. Youâre just going to get the same thing you always get,â Jungkook said with another shrug before giving you a menu back anyway, âBut fine, browse a little.â
âChill on the attitude,â You joked, looking over the menu with disinterest.
âHow do either of you manage to be here at least once a week?â The server grumbled as he approached the table, âAnd thatâs on a good week.â
âHey, I havenât been here in like, four days?â You said, second guessing yourself and looking at your friend, âHeâd live here everyday if he could.â
âTrue, Jin is one of the best cooks I know,â Jungkook confessed, making your server roll his eyes.
âPlease, Jinâs rarely here since the new place opened up but donât worry, Iâll pretend to believe you,â he snatched the menus away from you both, âAnd like you donât get the âFamily & Friendsâ discount. Whatâll it be? The usual?â
Jungkook turned to you with an amused expression, eyebrows raised as he waited to hear your new order. He even had the nerve to rest his chin in the palm of his hand and the server waited with a bored expression.
You sunk into your seat, âThe usual.â
âDamn, we shouldâve bet on it,â Jungkook grimaced as he took his phone out of his pocket to scroll through his socials, âSo how was the meeting? It took a while didnât it?â
âDonât even get me started on it, I can already tell theyâre going to be a handful. I might pass them onto Mirae,â You told him honestly, âShe can handle them better than I could.â
âItâs because youâre hot headed,â he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He felt your hard stare and he couldnât help but smirk, âYou know you are.â
âSays the guy who almost got into a fight because of Overwatch,â you threw your straw wrapper at him but he caught it and chucked it back at you.
âFirst of all we were in a tournament and I couldâve won some money,â Jungkook said defensively, âAny sane person would react the same way.â
You raised your brows pretending to be convinced and stared off into space. After your meal and you footed the bill like promised, Jungkook drove you to your apartment.
âLet me know if you need a ride to the garage tomorrow,â Jungkook said as he took the helmet back and you retrieved your things from his backpack.
âWhat are your plans tonight?â You asked curiously as he got back on his bike.
âI donât know, a friend of mine asked me to go have drinks with him so Iâll probably do that,â He told you honestly, âWhy? Wanna watch âLove, Death & Robotsâ again?â
âJust curious, be safe and donât drive,â You reminded him.
A grin widened on his face, âWill you pick me up if I drink too muchâoh right, you donât have a car⌠awkward.â
âAsshole,â you hit him playfully, making him sway but he kept himself steady.
âIâll call for an Uber or something, night.â
Thereâs not a specific moment that made you and Jungkook become good friends. You sort of just clicked right away. In the beginning there mightâve been a slight tinge of attraction but it was the kind you felt for a stranger walking past. It wasnât anything either of you wanted to pursue and ended with a good friendship. You learned a lot from each other and somehow managed to co-exist together.
In the beginning nearly all of his friends thought you were into him. They tried to put it into his head that you had a thing for him but it never went anywhere. Jungkook never made a move on you and after a while everyone just accepted it.
This is what friendship looked like. You didnât have to sleep with each other. You were like one of the guys⌠aside from the obvious. Now everyone just takes you as you are, a good friend of his with no sexual feelings involved.
âYou just got off work?â Yoongi asked as Jungkook finally joined him at the bar, âI thought I was going to have to drink enough for the both of us tonight.â
âDonât you wish,â Jungkook chuckled, taking a seat and the drink his friend ordered for him, âBut no, I was having dinner and had to drive Y/n home.â
âOh, how is she? Havenât seen her in a while,â Yoongi asked.
âHer car got Towed at my apartment for parking in someoneâs spot a couple days ago. Sheâs pissed,â Jungkook answered knowingly, âBut sheâll survive. Whatâd you ask me over here for?â
âOh, Iâm talking to this girl whoâll be here soon and sheâs got a friend with her.â
âŽ
Two hundred dollars down the drain all because you parked somewhere you werenât supposed to. It puts you in a bad mood for a couple days. You werenât necessarily short on cash but that didnât mean you wanted to waste it to get your car back.
âDonât touch me Iâm sad,â You mumbled into your desk as your coworker hovered a hand over your back ready to comfort you.
âYou didnât get it back?â Jimin asked, opting to sit on the edge of your desk instead.
âI did, thatâs why Iâm sad,â You nearly cried, âIâm never staying at anyoneâs apartment but mine ever again. Itâs too expensive and thereâs never enough parking anywhere.â
âPoor you, I know whatâll cheer you up though,â Jimin said with a scheming smile that had your head raising skeptically, âYou, Mirae and I out for dinner and a couple drinks after work.â
âIâm pretty sure I just said how much money I spent!â You rolled your eyes making him do the same.
âIâll pay, silly,â Jimin said, âYou look like you could use a drink.â
You were a victim of peer pressure, and for pressure you needed very little of it. All it took was both of your friends reminding you how much fun it would be before the FOMO set in and you joined them.
âYouâre so easily persuaded,â Mirae said with a laugh, âMin didnât even have to beg this time.â
âIâm going through a tough time right now,â You said playfully, reaching across the table for another portion of fries, âThanks for taking those clients.â
âYeah yeah, but if I need any favor you better be the first one to grant it,â Mirae pointed a stern finger at you and you nodded eagerly.
âOne Wish coupon with your name written on it, noted,â You tapped your head a couple times before shooting her a Thumbâs Up. Your coworker [turned close friend] rolled her eyes with a smile as she raised her glass, âReady to chug?â
âOh fuck no,â Jimin groaned, staring down his nearly full glass, âAre we drinking-drinking or are we drinking?â
âBaddie Baddie Shot OâClock,â you nudge his arm, âDonât be scared now. You asked for this.â
âWe have work tomorroâfuck it, letâs do it,â Jimin said while you and Mirae began a chant ready to take the drink.
There were a couple⌠a few drinks involved for all of you. It was supposed to be something casual but that never seems to be the case when youâre with your work friends. Theyâre a good time all the time and sometimes a nice break. Aside from Jungkook, they're some of your closest friends. They know you in a different light than he does. With Mirae you can talk to her about anything and with Jimin heâs a good time. He doesnât tease or scold you the way Jungkook does⌠he lets you have fun.
Not to say Jungkook doesnât but itâs different and you donât know how to explain why.
jungkook: hungryyyyyyyyy
jungkook: hungryyyyyyy
jungkook: HUNGRYYYY
you: lower your voice smh
âIs that Jungkook?â Jimin asked, stealing a fry for your plate, âWhatâs he doing? Ask him to meet us.â
âNo, Iâm mad at him,â You said with a huff, thinking about the expensive towing bill. You werenât actually mad at him but more about the price you paid today. Jungkook is the one who told you it was fine to park there and the one night you do, your car gets towed. Itâs never happened before and itâs technically his fault. His stupid landlord is an asshole and therefore youâre never stepping foot at his place again.
you: and actually Iâm mad at you
jungkook: đ¤ why
you: 200$ đ
jungkook: :(
you: you better buy me a spot if you want me to come over again
jungkook: hell no
You put your phone face down and looked at your empty glass, wiggling your brows at your two friends, âAnother?â
jungkook: hungrryyyyy
Jimin rolled his eyes even as he let you go to the bar and order more. While you were gone he got on his phone and began to type. Mirae looked over his shoulder, âWho are you calling?â
âJungkook.â
Jungkook knew Jimin well enough to have his number saved. They werenât close but heâs met him around you before and the guyâs cool. When he called Jungkook assumed it had something to do with you and answered.
âHey man, what are you doing?â
âStarving,â Jungkook groaned, staring at his empty fridge, âYou?â
âCome to JJâs, Y/n is here and weâre having a few drinks. Thereâs some food,â Jimin said as he looked up at you.
âJungkookâs on his way,â Jimin told you once the call came to an end but you barely shrugged in response.
When Jungkook arrived you greeted him like normal and he bumped you further into the booth before immediately digging into your plate. He even had the nerve to ask which drink was yours before taking it, âI havenât eaten all day.â
âWhy do I feel like thatâs a lie?â Jimin asked, trying to pass Jungkook the menu so he could order something for himself, âHow are ya, buddy?â
âAlright, busy with work,â Jungkook said with a shrug, âItâs been back to back sessions lately and I think I need a break.â
âHave you been going to the chiropractor?â You asked worriedly. Jungkook sneered, turning to look at you, âI thought you were mad at me.â
Your jaw nearly dropped as you scoffed. Heâs here eating your food and giving you attitude? Itâs obvious heâs joking but itâs annoying. You crossed your arms over your chest and slumped back, âYouâre here eating my food, asshole. Fine I wonât talk to you then.â
âI have been going to the chiro,â Jungkook says to you, âThanks for worrying.â
âI wasnât worrying,â You rolled your eyes looking across the table at Mirae as Jungkook and Jimin talked like they were good friends.
âOkay I know what Iâm using my wish coupon on,â Mirae said suddenly, âYouâre going with me to the movies.â
âYay, what are we watching?â You asked more interested now.
âI donât know. The guys havenât chosen the movie yet,â Mirae said as she got on her phone and went to add you to a groupchat.
âWhat guys?â Jimin asked curiously, making Jungkook turn to look as well.
âMy friendâs boyfriend and his friends,â Mirae explained briefly, âThey've been wanting to go see this horror movie but it always feels awkward when I tag along with her, her man and his friends.â
âSounds like a group date,â Jungkook said to you, watching your excitement slowly turn to dejection and for some reason it made his heart beat faster.
âIt kinda does,â You agreed.
âItâs not like that. Theyâre actually kind of cool but I still want someone to talk to,â Mirae told you, âTheyâre cute.â
âLet me see a picture,â You reached out for her phone.
âAre you seeing anyone?â Jungkook asked Jimin who aggressively shook his head no.
âNot since the last one, I think she broke my heart,â Jimin pretended to sniffle, âYou?â
âNah, kinda? No,â Jungkook shook his head, âWhatever it is, it's nothing serious.â
âItâs never serious,â You corrected, âI donât know how he keeps track of them all.â
âDonât make me out to be a slut,â Jungkook placed his hand over his chest. Easy banter went on for the rest of the night. It was casual and comforting to spend time with those close to you on a random week night. It reminded you of how good things can be and why you liked being with them. Jimin was fun, careless, considerate. Mirae is full of welcomed attitude and charm. Jungkook is comfortable and protective, always around and ready to meet up for anything. They made things feel easy.
When you date a guy you want him to fit in with your friends and that is hard to find.
âŽ
Jungkook has always been a laid back guy. Despite whatever struggles heâs had, heâs always taken them with a strong head on his shoulders and people to support him. He comes from a loving family and close friends heâs known for years. Heâs been in relationships and talking stages that changed him and did his military service as early as he could. He had a plan for himself and when he decided to go to college he didnât expect to meet you.
Itâs not like you had a huge impact on him or anything but he didnât expect to meet someone he can get along with so easily. He thought he already had his lifelong friends picked out. How did you manage to force your way into his close circle and introduce to people and things he wouldnât have known otherwise.
Youâre his best friend and donât let any of the guys hear him admit that. They already give him too much shit about you.
âAre you going for Y/n?â His friend asked a few days after he met up with you and your friends for dinner. Heâs been up to his usual routine during the week and has barely gotton to see or talk to you.
Jungkook and his friend just had a two hour gym session that left them both jittery and out of breath as they sat in the locker room packing up their belongings. He pulled his helmet out and carried it next to him as he shook his head no, âIâm not driving her around anymore.â
âShe got her car back? Thatâs good,â Taehyung said. You didnât have it for almost a full week and during that time Jungkook was helping you get to and from work. Since then youâve had your car and havenât had a reason to call him upânot that it mattered or anything.
âWanna get on the game later?â He asked.
âSure, Iâll shower and have dinner then hop on.â
The two split ways and Jungkook got on his bike to rush home. His evenings didnât contain much excitement as they did during his college days but they were alright. Heâd do exercises after work, head home and wash up, make dinner or go out, and hang out. If he was seeing someone it would look slightly different but he doesnât usually let it get that far.
Itâs not that heâs scared of commitment or anything, he just doesnât feel the need to be dating at the moment. Heâs perfectly content with the way he lives and if he were to get serious with anyone it would have to be someone who understands him. Yes, he does the occasional hook up or fling but theyâre never more than that. Heâs bad at seriously dating. Heâs got to feel truly comfortable with someone.
After his shower, he stood alone in his kitchen thinking of what to make for dinner when he checked the time on his phone. It was almost nine and heâs yet to hear about how your night has gone. The movie was set at six so you had to rush after work to meet with Mirae and all her people but the movie shouldâve ended by now. Why havenât you told him how it went if itâs over now?
Maybe he should just ask.
jungkook: is the movie over
You probably wonât respond if your phoneâs on âDo Not Disturbâ so he didnât expect a response.
you: yeah
jungkook: was it scary
you: ehhhhhh not really
jungkook: what r u doing now
you: they wanted to get food after
jungkook: and here I am cooking for myself
Without question Jungkook took a picture of it all, sending it right to you with a message that said;
jungkook: ur favorite
you: đ is that an invite
jungkook: depends, r u gonna actually come over or hang out with ur new friends
you: idk one of them is reallllyyyyyy cute
jungkook: stay with them then
You looked at everyone you were with curiously. The movie had ended a bit ago and you were walking to the nearest restaurant talking. Mirae was right, the guys were cool and her friend was nice but it was a lot of effort on your part to be social. One of the guys was particularly cute and he spent a little more time with you than anyone else but did that really mean anything?
âI think Iâm gonna call it a night,â You said, thinking about the early morning you have tomorrow and how everyone seemed ready to grab a few drinks. Mirae looked at you, âReally? Youâre not even hungry?â
âNot really,â You lied with a shrug, âAre you gonna be good?â
âYeah, Iâll see you tomorrow.â
You said goodbye to them all, sharing information with the cute friend and split ways. On your way to Jungkookâs he let you know parking spot 97 was good to use and despite arguing with him about it you took his word.
âIf I get towed again weâre not going to be friends anymore,â You told him once you let yourself into his apartment, immediately being greeted by Bam whose tail whipped back and forth behind him with excitement.
âItâs my spot, Goofy,â Jungkook said, casually throwing on a shirt once you were in. Up until now heâs been cooking shirtless from his shower.
âYour spot is 98,â You reminded him, watching the way he rolled his eyes and turned the stove off.
âDidnât you tell me to rent you one?â Jungkook asked, pulling the pot off the stove and onto a cooling rack, âGrab bowls.â
âYou actually did it?â You asked with a smile, âBless your kind soul.â
He brushed you off as you did what he asked and went straight to the end of the peninsula countertop where you could sit and eat. Jungkook didnât bother sitting down, choosing to eat standing up behind the counter and looking at you with curiosity.
âWhat?â
âHow was the date?â He asked.
âWhat date?â You scoffed, âYou mean the movie? One, it wasnât a date and Two, I told you it was alright.â
âYou didnât drink, did you?â Jungkook asked, ignoring the attitude behind your words. You rolled your eyes, âI wouldnât have driven here if I had been. I left before we made it to the restaurants. Why so curious tonight?â
He shrugged, the plate completely empty and he began to wash it and what he used to cook. When you finished and offered to help he told you no and washed your stuff too.
âIâm so full, have I ever told you how good of a Cook you are,â You said as you threw yourself onto his couch, a grunt leaving your lips when Bam nearly tackled you down.
âI wouldnât mind hearing it again,â Jungkook said, rummaging through his fridge and smiling widely, âWant a drink?â
âIâm driving.â
âYou can just crash on the couch, itâll be fine,â Jungkook shrugged, carrying over a couple glasses and a bottle of Soju.
That was enough convincing for you to sit on the floor beside him as he set things down on the coffee table. You took the remote and played some movie in the background as he poured the small glass.
âYouâre a bad influence,â You joked as you took the first drink like it was a pre-starter and he did the same, âWeâve got work tomorrow.â
âYou only go in for a couple hours, I know your schedule, don't forget that,â Jungkook pointed a teasing finger at you, plopping down on the floor with his legs crossed, âIâve got a beginnerâs session around 10am and a few private classes after. Iâll be the one regretting it tomorrow, not you.â
âYet youâre still the one asking for more,â You said playfully, reaching for the familiar green bottle and pouring a little more in his glass. You didnât notice the way Jungkookâs gaze flickered down to your exposed waist when you leaned over the coffee table to grab it. The waist of your underwear showed just slightly underneath and he was surprised to find out it was black and lacy making his eyebrow quirk with curiosity. When you sat back down he looked away, pretending to be focused on the movie, âYou dressed up for your date?â
âIt wasnât a date,â You said with a groan, sitting back a little closer to him than before and he didnât bother moving away, âAnd look at what Iâm wearing. Does it look like I dressed up?â
A knowing smirk pulled at his lips as he raised the glass to his lips, âI didnât realize you wore lace so casually.â
Your brows furrowed with confusion, realization dawning on you just moments later and without thinking you pushed at him playfully, âHowâd you know?â
Jungkook laughed, hand sliding down your back where your shirt rose and he didnât hesitate to reach for the thin fabric nearly pulling on it just to feel you squirm. You couldnât help but whine, moving away, âFreak.â
âSays you,â Jungkook said, keeping his hand on you, âCome on tell me, how was the date.â
âWhy are you insisting it was a date?â You asked, taking a big gulp and turning to face him, âYou never hear me asking about your little flings or whatever you like to call them nowadays.â
âBut if you asked me Iâd tell you, I wouldnât be all secretive about it like you are,â He said with a shrug of his shoulders, âHurry up and drink more.â
âDonât pressure me,â You rolled your eyes but did as told, âAnd I did tell you. I said one of them were cute over text, remember?â
âHardly,â He shrugged looking away with a bored expression, âCuter than me?â
You didnât say anything making him smile, âIâll take that as a no.â
âHe was alright, pretty cute and nice,â You finally said but Jungkook wasnât listening anymore. His attention had drifted to the way you leaned against him with your side against his fitting perfectly beside him. It was obvious your words fell on deaf ears but you didnât seem to mind either. You turned to face him, convince him that the guy you met was just cute but it wasnât worth it. Youâll probably never see the guy again and if he does want to text, it most likely wonât lead to anything.
âWhat?â He asked, catching your stare.
âYouâre drunk,â You pointed out his red cheeks and ears, âAlready?â
âNo.â
âThen why are you blushing?â You asked with a teasing smile going to poke his flushed cheek when he grabbed your hand suddenly. You both had been casually drinking since you sat down but it isn't until now that you can feel the alcohol take effect over your body. You blamed it for the way you were looking at your friend at the moment.
It was hard to see him as just Jungkook, right now you can only see him for how attractive he was. Heâs gotten way more muscular lately and with the added tattoos itâs hard to ignore it. When you walked into his apartment earlier and found him shirtless it was hard not to look at his abdomen. You donât remember the eight pack or his biceps that big. Without thinking you placed a hand on his chest, taut muscles tense underneath your touch.
Jungkook couldnât help but let his breath hitch when your hand trailed down his rib cage suddenly, âWhat?â
âYouâve gotta get a new hobby, youâre going to get too bulky,â You said jokingly, feeling his muscles. He was taken back to have your hand on him but he didnât back away, âBut you like it.â
Not bothering to wait for a response, he lifted the end of his shirt displaying a smooth trail of muscle down his torso and prominent V-line that you tried not to eye too hard. Your hand slipped down without much thought to your actions and lifted your brows in surprise. His skin felt hot to the touch and part of you wanted to keep running your hand over him but you knew better. It would be weird if you did. Itâs not like heâs just some random guyâŚ
âI need to pee,â You blurted out, rushing to your feet and kicking his leg playfully, âPut your shirt down.â
âMight just take it off for you,â Jungkook teased, biting his lip watching you walk away.
When you were alone looking at yourself in the mirror it was easier to tell how you felt. You were past tipsy and buzzed but not fully drunk. Your vision was slightly blurry and when you stood straight you felt dizzy but it was the good kind of dizzy.
âWhat next?â Jungkook asked when you came out of the bathroom, hair up in a clip now and makeup wiped away with some wet wipe he had in the bathroom. He had to do a double take at your new appearance but he didnât mind the change. You looked comfortable and he can see the clear look of buzz on your face that heâs sure matched his, âOr are you calling it already?â
âCalling what?â You sat back down next to him, stumbling into him a little and he helped you with a hand on your waist guiding you down. Neither of you seemed to care for the fact that you were partially sitting on his lap.
âCalling it a night,â Jungkook said, shifting you closer to his front, âYouâve taken off your makeup, put your hair up⌠you look ready for bed.â
âI thought you wanted to drink,â You said, suddenly aware of how close the two of you were and his lip piercing had a slight shine from the light reflecting off of it.
âNot if your date tired you out,â Jungkook said with a knowing smirk when you rolled your eyes, leaning into him a little more. He didnât care who you met up with tonight but he knows itâs getting on your nerves and sometimes he loves to push your buttons, âYou probably wouldâve preferred to stay out with them since one of them was⌠whatâd you say? Cute? Nice?â
âIf you think that, why'd you ask me to come over?â You asked slightly irritated now.
He shrugged, grinning now when he felt you relax in his hold, almost straddling him, âTechnically, I did say you could stay with them.â
Your eyes narrowed, hands on his chest ready to push yourself off him, âFine, I got his number. Iâll see if theyâre still ouââ
âNo,â He whined, arms tightening around your waist, âNo, youâre already here and youâre drunk now. You canât leave, be a safe driver.â
âAre you trying to manipulate me to stay?â You couldnât help but laugh, arms circling around his neck. He felt your breath tickle his ear and for some reason it made a shiver run down his spine.
âDepends, is it working?â
It was.
It had been since the beginning. Jungkook didnât need to do much to get you to hang out with him and he knew that. Itâs the same way around. It takes little for Jungkook to beg you to spend time with him. Youâre his best friend.
And as his best friend⌠sometimes⌠sometimes he wonders how your lips taste. He doesnât remember when his hand moved from your waist to your neck, or how he moved it to tilt your chin up until your lips were brushing against each other. All he remembers is how close you were to kissing and all he needed was one push, one sign that you want this too and heâll go for it.
You nearly fell into it too. You can blame the alcohol or the fact that Jungkook is incredibly hot despite only seeing him as a friend but you wanted to kiss him too. You wouldâve.
Key words: Would Have.
âOpen the door, you Fuck!â
You practically threw yourself off him as someone pounded on his door and it took you a second to reel in what was about to happen. Jungkook couldnât move for a second, trying to understand why you got off of him so quickly when he heard it again.
âJungkook, I checked your location, open up,â His friend yelled, knocking on the door, âIâm going to piss myself, let me in!â
âComing!â Jungkook shouted, sounding annoyed as he got up to unlock the front door. You pulled yourself onto the couch, fixing your shirt that had risen when his hands had grazed your waist and stared down at the empty bottles of Soju.
âTaeââ He couldnât finish his sentence before his friend was pushing past him and running straight for the bathroom, waving hello to you before disappearing. He stood at the open door trying to wrap his head around what just happened.
The two of you were drinking, messing around and almost kissed? Almost? If Taehyung hadnât come barging in would you have done it? Would you know when to stop? Would you stop anyway?
âFuck, I was in the cab on my way home and he would not pull over,â Taehyung said once he was done with his business, âI was like âListen dude, my friend lives around here so drop me off or Iâm going to puke in your backseatâ.â
âI thought you had to pee,â You chimed in when he sat down next to you, acting like he had been there the whole time.
âI thought so too but it came up the other way instead, what are you guys doing? Drinking?â Taehyung asked looking down at the coffee table, âUgh I canât even think about it, donât play APT with Jin hyung, he talks too fast and wins everytime.â
âMaybe he was just speaking gibberish but you couldnât tell,â Jungkook said, arms crossed over his chest looking unimpressed, âSo⌠is the cab still out there waiting orâŚâ
âNah, Iâm just gonna crash hereââ
âGreat!â Jungkook scoffed, âSleepover at my place, first Y/n⌠now you⌠itâs like weâre in schoolâŚâ
âWell I wouldâve gone home if you didnât ask to drink,â You told him trying to ignore the fact that you almost kissed but it was hard to ignore the way he bit his lip at you, âI could still call an Uber.â
âNah, Taehyung can,â Jungkook said, sitting on the armchair across from you.
âWhoa, youâre the first person I thought of, why kick me out now? Iâm drunk, Kook, be nice to me,â Taehyung pouted, leaning against your shoulder, âWhatâd you do? Whyâs he so grumpy?â
âDonât blame me, youâre the one that came pounding on the door so late at night,â You said playfully, shoving Taehyung off. He was more Jungkookâs friend then yours but youâve hung out around him enough to feel comfortable with him.
âSo? I always do thatâWhy?â Taehyung turned abruptly, âWhat were you guys doing?â
âDrinking,â Jungkook said, âYou wouldnât want to since yknow⌠Jin got you drunk⌠you probably want to call it a nightâŚâ
âNah, I puked a little earlier so Iâm fine now,â Taehyung said, âPlus I havenât seen Y/n in a while, what are we watching?â
âActually, Iâm tired,â You told him with a small yawn, âI think Iâm calling it a night.â
âAre you trying to get rid of me?â Taehyung asked.
You laughed, âNo, Iâm just saying Iâm tired.â
âGo to my room,â Jungkook said with a sigh, thinking about what the two of you were about to do before he stormed in, âIâll stay out here with him.â
When you left, Jungkook threw a pillow at Taehyungâs head, making the other groan, âWhat?â
âNothing,â Jungkook huffed , âNow I gotta sleep on the couch.â
Taehyung smirked, feeling more sober now as he put two and two together, âOr you could go follow your girlfriendâŚâ
âWeâre noâweâre not dating,â Jungkook thought about how you almost kissed and his face flushed red, âFor fuckâs same, go get the extra blankets and pillows. I get the big couchââ
âBut Iâm like a centimeter taller thanââ
âThis is my house!â Jungkook yelled, throwing himself on the couch and covering his face with one of the pillows, âOr get an Uber back to yours.â
âJeez, youâre rude tonight. I always come over when Iâm drunk,â Taehyung laughed knowing how annoyed Jungkook was, âJust say you were going to get freaky with Y/n.â
âI wasnât!â
âŽ
It took you a full day to come to terms with what happened the other night at Jungkookâs. The two of you had been drinking and almost kissed, almost.
Thereâs no way to deny it. You were close to kissing.
If Taehyung hadnât shown up out of the blue, would you have done it? Would he have slept in the same bed as you? What would you do or say if he asked?
Thereâs always been an underlying sense of tension between you but you tried not to think about it. You told yourself that nothing was ever going to happen. It was just how friendships with someone you found attractive was.
A loud sigh left your lips, dropping your head against your keyboard and letting an endless stream of spaces fill the word document. Soft fingers pulled your head up to slide the keyboard out making you look up at the person who did it. Jimin sat at the end of your desk, âI was just sitting in my office wondering why my friend hasnât gone to distract me today. Whatâs up with you?â
âMorning, canât focus,â You told him.
âHowâd the showing go?â Jimin asked, trying to find something that could get you talking.
âThey liked it, itâs a little over their budget but I think weâll close the deal on it,â You said.
âGood, what about the other night?â
âWhat about the other night?â Your question sounded rushed and made him look at you with peaked interest. He crossed his arms over his chest and smirked.
âWith Mirae and the movie,â Jimin said. He watched you release a breath you werenât aware you were holding and pressed you for more, âDid you talk to any of the guys?â
âYeah⌠um, I did,â You sat back, chair swiveling out as you turned to face him, âHis nameâs Namjoon. I got his number and he texted me yesterday before the showing to wish me luck.â
âSo what? Are you and Mirae gonna ditch me when you guys find someone? Who are going to be my drinking buddies when youâre off with your boyfriends? She told me all about the other guy, Iâm starting to feel pushed aside,â Jimin spoke in a ramble making you roll your eyes.
âRelax, it was the first time I met him. Mirae, yeah she really hit it off with the other guy,â You said.
Jimin just nodded, taking in your words and finally deciding to bring it up, âMirae said you left early though.â
âYeah, they wanted to go out to eat but I wasnât hungryâŚâ You said.
âBullshit, I checked your location, you went to Jungkookâs plaââ
âOkay! Whatâs up with all the stalking lately? First Taehyung, now youâwe share locations so that you know Iâm safe after a night out,â You pointed a finger at him, trying to deflect some of the questions away from you, âAnd yeah, I did go to his place. He made food and I didnât want to go eat with all of them anyway.â
âInteresting excuse, so what? Did you guys fight or something? You know I understand youâre close friends but youâre not close friends like we are.â
âThatâs not truââ You cut yourself off thinking about how you almost kissed Jungkook and as much as you love Jimin, youâll never find yourself kissing him, almost!
A loud groan left your lips as you dropped your head against the keyboard again and Jimin watched the aggressive keyboard smash type out gibberish. This time it was his turn to roll his eyes and he stood up, âWe both know thatâs a lie but fine, Iâll let you be.â
You donât remember how the rest of your day went aside from the fact that you were distracted the entire time. Right now you have three different clients youâre currently helping buy their first home and the last thing you need is to be distracted right now.
Jungkook is your friend and until he makes it clear that he is interested, youâre just going to move on. Well⌠even if he was interested, what does that mean? Does that mean youâre into him? Itâs all so confusing.
He took a deep breath, leg threatening to bounce with anxiety as he counted the reps his current client did between sets.
âKook, man, youâre killing me today,â His client said with a deep huff, nearly collapsing on the floor as he set the weight down, âI thought weâd be taking it easy after the last session.â
âI donât know why you would think that,â Jungkook said, âTake a breather and do another fifteen.â
Even as he said that, he switched places with Hoseok and prepared himself to do a set. His client watched him with his mouth open in confusion, âItâs what you said! You said weâd be taking it easy today since last time was so much. Iâm still a sore man, please donât do this to me.â
âYouâre right, I did say that,â Jungkook huffed, counting in his head as he did bench presses, âNext session weâll take it easy.â
âFuck, I need a new trainer,â Hoseok groaned, chugging back water and pacing back and forth.
âYouâre at my gym! Youâre lucky weâre friends, donât say that,â Jungkook stood up and motioned for Hoseok to go, âNow you're doing twenty.â
âRude,â Hoseok said, âWhatâs up with you anyways? You seem on edge today.â
âIâm fine,â Jungkook said looking down at his gym bag where his phone currently was, âBut uh, just out of curiosity⌠if someone hasnât talked to you in a couple days, what does it mean?â
Hoseok couldnât help but chuckle, âCome on, how old are we? Thatâs what youâre stressing about?â
When Jungkook didnât laugh it off Hoseok got a little more serious, âDepends on the person. Girlfriend? Family member? Stranger?â
âNot girlfriendâjust friend,â Jungkook clarified quickly.
âFriend?â Hoseok looked at him curiously, âFriend with the occasional benefits or Friend youâre currently upset with?â
âNeither, just friend,â Jungkook shook his head, âI mean⌠like actual, genuine friend and⌠fuck, I donât know.â
âWho?â
Jungkook didnât say anything but it wasnât hard for Hoseok to connect the pieces, âY/n?â
To that, Jungkook nodded meekly.
âI mean⌠itâs normal to not talk everyday. We donât talk everyday, I send you like a hundred Instagram reels a day that you donât see me crying about,â Hoseok said, skipping from 15 to 17 and hoping Jungkook didnât catch the reps he didnât do, âWhich by the way, you could at least bother to react to every now and then.â
âSorry, youâre right, Iâm overthinking it,â Jungkook said, âAnd youâre not done, you skipped ahead.â
âFucker,â Hoseok cursed under his breath and hurried to do them properly before he could take a break, âBut honestly, whatâs up with you and Y/n? Arenât you âjust friendsâ?â
âWe are,â Jungkook bit his lip nervously, âI donât know Iâm being weird. Iâll just ask her what shes doing later.â
âBeing weird about what?â
Jungkook looked at him with wide, rounded eyes like heâd just been caught doing something he shouldnât have and the words came out in a shy whisper, âNothing.â
âŽ
Over the night Jungkook reached out to you. He sent you some stupid text about a new tv show heâs watching that he thinks you could get into. It wasnât anything serious or anything but it brushed past what happened. It was normal.
Things were normal and clearly nothing had happened that night so you were overthinking for no reason.
âYou donât want to go?â Mirae asked, watching you stare at your reflection for the hundredth time trying to find something off about your appearance.
âI do, weâre going, donât worry,â You looked around, âI just need perfume.â
âWhereâs Jungkook?â She asked, standing up for you to give her some too. You checked the ETA on your Uber before answering.
âHuh? Heâs probably already there, I donât know. Letâs go downstairs, the Uberâs pulling up,â You told her as you quickly grabbed your things and began to walk out your room. Your friend followed suit, âAnd then weâre going out with Namjoon and Jisoo, right?â
The only reason Mirae agreed to come with you was so that you could go with her and the guy she likes later. A couple days ago Jungkook let you know that Taehyung was going to have a few friends over to watch some MMA fight on tv and drink. You still felt awkward seeing him in person and he knew you had no reason to say no so there was no point in trying. In the end you asked Mirae to join you and after begging, she agreed. She had plans with one of the guys from last week and found it perfect to have you tag along after.
Youâve been to Taehyungâs place once or twice before â usually with Jungkook â but it was different to walk in without him.
âLook who finally showed up,â Taehyung said with a smile as he opened the door for you and Mirae, âHi Y/n, and Mirae right?â
The two have met before but it was brief and awkward so you were surprised he even remembered her name but they greeted each other politely anyway. You looked around, surprised to see a lot more people than you anticipated, âDoesnât look like a couple friends, Tae.â
âIâm a social being,â Taehyung said with a hand to his chest, âJungkook is somewhere around here. I thought youâd be coming with him and then got stuck waiting around for you to show up.â
âI need a drink first.â
Jungkook was across the room talking with some people you didnât know. It wasnât hard for you to see that the one closest to him was a pretty brunette with a soft smile and big eyes. She talked with him the most and you had no idea who she was. For all you know he couldâve come with her tonight or just met her and really hit it off, youâre not sure, and youâd rather not know.
He barely knew the girl but Yoongi introduced her to him a while before you got to Taehyungâs place. He had been staring at his phone anxiously waiting for a text that never came and the next thing he knew, Yoongi was having him meet Sera. She was pretty and easy to talk to, paid attention to him even when others talked and stood by him wherever he moved to. It was alright, he didnât mind the extra attention but it wasnât⌠that interesting.
Sera said something in his ear that he had to lean down to hear properly but in all honesty he wasnât listening to begin with. If anything it reminded him of when you whispered in his ear but it didnât feel the same. His eyes scanned the people that arrived over time, occasionally drifting to the door and stopping once he saw you walk in. You wore a short black dress that accentuated your legs and it was hard for his eyes to remain on your face. Mirae was dressed similarly and you both looked out of place in a good way.
âHow do you know Taehyung?â He heard Sera ask and he answered with little eagerness, watching you talk with his friend and head for the drinks.
âWe met a few years ago when I first moved to the city,â Jungkook said, looking down at her trying to focus but his mind had gone elsewhere. Turning to Yoongi he said, âIâm gonna go say hi to Y/n.â
Yoongi could try and keep him around but there was no point. Jungkook was walking off before anyone could stop him. He left Sera alone with the others so he can talk to you. Since you last seen each other and had the âAlmost Kissâ he had only texted you. Youâve both had a busy week with work and nerves probably kept you apart.
He didnât like that. He didnât want to overthink anything. He just wanted to talk to his friend.
âWhat are we drinking?â He asked with an overly gracious smile, slipping himself between you and the counter so you were forced to look at him.
âDepends, what have you had?â You asked, immediately feeling yourself tense for a second before you realized who it was.
âNothing too strong just yet,â Jungkook admitted, âIâve been waiting for you all night.â
He greeted your friend quietly before looking back at you and where you stared off at, âReally? Iâve been here for a while, I figured you wouldâve noticed earlier if youâve been waiting all this time.â
He could sense the small sarcastic tone in your voice but there was nothing strange to it. You usually talked this way with him, always sounding close to flirting or jealous or⌠interested in him. It was confusing at first but overtime heâs learned to ignore the tone or offer it back. It works for your friendship.
âI mightâve gotten a little distracted,â He couldnât help but smile, âWhat time did you get home last night?â
âEarly,â You said with a shrug making his brow arch, watching you pour yourself a mix of rum and coke.
âThen why didnât you text me back?â He asked.
âI didâwell, I was going to,â You began to say, feeling yourself on the edge of smiling as you thought up an excuse, âI forgot.â
âRightâŚâ Jungkook rolled his eyes looking over at Mirae instead, âYou both look nice, did you just have dinner or something?â
âNo, weâre meeting up with some guys in a bit,â Mirae said without much thought and you snapped your eyes to her. She looked up, catching the way Jungkookâs smile dropped a fraction lower and shifted her gaze toward you. Your glare was enough to tell her she shouldnât have said anything.
âGuys? The oneâs from the movie? What are you doing? Going out?â He asked, attempting to sound indifferent. Itâs not like he can say anything. He doesnât know why it doesnât sit right with him but it didnât. He didnât even know the guy but he knew you thought he was cute. Jungkook knew you were talking to him at least a little and that you wore a dress for him tonight.
âTake this,â You offered Jungkook the drink, âAnd weâre going out for a little bit but I think itâll be a casual night.â
âSuper casual,â Mirae laughed nervously, looking around, âWhereâs the bathroom? Iâll be back.â
Before you could follow after her, he stood in front of you.
âSo who were you talking to? Have I met her?â You asked, clearing your throat awkwardly. It was an attempt to take some of the heat off of you because this was feeling like an odd interrogation. Anyone passing but might think itâs a loverâs quarrel but it wasnât.
âIâve barely met her,â Jungkook said, âItâs Sora⌠Sua⌠Sera? Something like that, I donât know. A friend of Yoongiâs I met the other night.â
âCool,â You looked back to find her talking with someone else now.
âWhat about the cute and nice guy youâve been going on about? Youâre seeing him again tonight?â Jungkook asked, taking a sip from the cup and leaning against the kitchen counter. He had a good view of you standing a couple feet away and he had to resist the urge to pull you closer.
âI have not been going on about him, thereâs nothing going on,â You told him with an exaggerated sigh, leaning into him absentmindedly and feeling his hand on your side keeping you steady, âI asked Mirae to come with but she had plans with them after and just asked me to tag along.â
âAlright, you donât have to explain it.â Jungkook said, sounding like he was brushing you off but not meaning to. Obviously he was happy you were here and talking to him but he didnât want to hear more. It was beginning to sound like you were explaining yourself to him. Making yourself sound better after he asked you about Namjoon. He doesnât even know why he asked you about that guy, he doesnât care.
âAlright, I wonât,â you crossed your arms over your chest looking away from him, âDonât ask me about anyone then.â
Jungkook had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from responding. He didnât have anything to say because all he wanted was for you to tell him a little more about Namjoon. Why did he act like he didnât care when he did?
Without bothering to ask anything he was scared to know about, he turned away from you and looked back at the people he was standing with before. You walked off to find Mirae, a little annoyed with Jungkook for reasons you couldnât understand and needed to get away. Whatever, you almost kissed and considering he hasn't said anything about it itâs clearly not on his mind. If thatâs the case why does he act like he cares about who you talk to only to stop you when you explain yourself?
When he joined Yoongi and the others again he acted like he didnât care that you wandered off away from him. He didnât seem bothered when you left later that night without saying goodbye and didnât check his phone once for a text from you.
He canât explain why but he doesnât know how to feel about you. For so long now it feels like youâve just been a close friend to him. Youâre someone he calls when heâs bored and thinks of when he finds something funny. You get him like a friend, you donât expect much either. Youâre more like the guys heâs friends with, and youâre not like the girls whoâve tried to get with him. He doesnât know how to explain it but he likes having you around and the last thing he wants to do is complicate things by catching feelings.
Especially when he doesnât know how you feel and heâs too nervous to ask. Itâd be crossing the line. Youâd probably be grossed out if he expresses interest in you. Heâs seen how quick you are to stop being friends with a guy who approaches you like a friend but wants to be with you.
Heâs already done too much by almost kissing you.
âY/n, good to see you and donât you look pretty,â Namjoon said later that night, hugging you in greeting when you met up with him and Jisoo. The club youâd gone to after Taehyungâs was lovely and packed with people everywhere that it was hard to find him in the first place. He brought a surprising smile to your face but youâre not sure how to feel about him just yet.
âThank you, thank you, dressed up just for you,â You told him playfully, leaning against the bar when Jisoo asked for your drink order. Namjoon was attractive and charming but⌠thereâs something holding you back even if you flirted with him absentmindedly. Was there much weight to your actions? Did you actually care to get to know him better?
âI like it, howâs your night been?â Namjoon attempted small talk. It was what your conversations usually consisted of. Even the first night you met you only talked about the movie and when Jungkook texted you, you talked about your friends too.
Heâs told you a little about himself and youâve told about yourself but not enough. Your mind always seemed off somewhere else.
Time passed by without wondering about Jungkook, using Namjoon as a distraction but it didnât work for as long as you hoped. When your night had dulled and your friends dared to call it the end, Namjoon looked at you for an invitation to your apartment that you never gave him. You went your separate ways and left on your own.
It was past 3am and you shouldâve gone to bed, not gotten on your phone to find someone to talk to.
âHello?â
âAre you sleeping?â You asked, falling on your bed and sinking into the pillows.
âWas trying to, whatâs up?â Jungkook asked with a small yawn that had you debating if you should hang up and let him sleep instead.
âNevermind, youâre tired I shouldnât have called,â You began to say, looking around for your phone charger to connect it before you end the call.
He sat up in bed, checking the time and sighing, âBut you did, are you still out with your new friends?â
âJungkook!â You whined, rolling onto your stomach and staring up at your dimly lit ceiling.
âIâm kidding,â He laughed softly, voice a little raspy from being half-asleep but he couldnât help but press you again, âBut are you?â
âI just got home but Iâm not tired. Iâm bored.â You admitted.
âWhat should I do about that?â Jungkook smiled, imagining the way you roll your eyes.
âI donât knowâŚâ You bit your lip in thought. You really werenât tired but that didnât mean you had to drag Jungkook around.
âWant me to come over?â He finally asked.
âItâs late.â
âI think we both know that.â He rolled his eyes, already getting out of bed so he could throw some clothes on, âDo you?â
âWhat would we do?â You asked, leaving your bedroom so you could get the front door unlocked for him.
He put his phone on speaker as he slipped on a pair of sweats and threw a hoodie over his head, âI donât know, we both donât work tomorrow. Maybe watch a movie?â
âAt this hour?â You asked. You could hear Jungkook huff, sitting on the edge of his bed unsure what to do, âYou really want to come over?â
âMaybe, you did ditch me tonightââ Jungkook started, getting cut off by yet another whine.
âNo I didnât! You know what, come over so we can talk,â You told him.
âIâm already getting dressed, chill out.â
It took only around ten minutes for Jungkook to come around and he walked into your apartment with a shake of his head. You mustâve left it unlocked earlier and he didnât like that. What if someone broke in? He locked the door behind himself, kicking his shoes off by the heels you wore tonight. The only light he could find came from your bedroom and he didnât hesitate to let himself in.
âWhat have I told you about leaving your door unlocked?â His words were barely heard over your scream of terror as you walked out of the bathroom dressed in a t-shirt and pajama shorts.
Once the scare wore off you said, âRelax I left it open for you.â
âSure you did, I bet it was for your new friâow!â He groaned dramatically when you hit his arm playfully. He laughed at your annoyance and threw himself on the bed, âIâm kidding. Whatâd you go do anyway? Did your dress leave him swooning?â
âYouâre so annoying,â You sighed jumping down next to him, âJust say youâre jealous.â
âJealous?â A scoff left his lips.
âSounds like it,â You looked for your remote, âWhat do you wanna watch?â
âIâm not jealous. If you want to go hang out with another guy then do what you want,â Jungkook cleared his throat awkwardly, âWeâre just friends, anyway.â
You raised a brow in confusion and surprise by his tone with you, âAnd if I wanted to donât you think I would be doing that right now?
âI mean you did earlier when you left,â Jungkook said annoyingly.
âGo home if youâre going to argue with me,â You told him, rolling your eyes and crossing your arms over your chest with frustration.
âHell no, I drove over at this hour, Iâm sleeping here,â As if to make his point more clear, he made himself comfortable on your bed.
âNot if youâre going to act mean.â
âIâm not!â Jungkook scoffed, leaning up with your pillows, âIâll stop, whatever, fine. Donât kick me out, itâs so late. I drove all the way here for you.â
âItâs like a ten minute drive,â You groaned when he pulled on the end of your hoodie, âWhat?â
âThis is mine,â Jungkook looked at the gray apparel, âI donât remember giving it to you.â
âYou didnât, but you left it in my car,â You tried to pull back but it was no use. Jungkook wasnât letting you move away.
âSo? Doesnât mean itâs yours. I want it backââ
âIâll wash it,â You pulled your covers up to hide yourself underneath but there was no point. A smirk appeared on his face, âI want it now though.â
You didnât say anything as he pulled you closer, falling over him a little. His hand slid down your waist keeping you against him, too close to be appropriate for two friends.
âWhat are you gonna do? Take it off me?â You dared to ask, making yourself comfortable against his chest. Part of you knew you shouldnât be laying in bed like this with your friend.
âShould I?â He asked in a low whisper, fingers slipping up your back just under the hoodie where he could feel your bare skin. You didnât wear anything underneath and it made him want to explore more.
You didnât say anything or bother to push his hand away. You kind of liked his touch, it was gentle but his fingers were rough from all the time he spends at the gym. Your body lay on his, leg nearly hooked around his waist and looking down at him with curiosity.
Jungkook could make out small fragments of makeup you couldnât get all the way off. There was still a small outline of lip gloss and your lashes were dark and long. Your cheeks still had a hint of blush but even in this state you were pretty. He canât get the image of you in that dress earlier out of his mind.
You were oddly close to him and found yourself in the same predicament as last time. Your lips only centimeters apart from his and a need to close that space. Jungkook parted his lips in a breath, catching the way you looked at him and his hand had slowed down its caress until it was tracing a soft line against your spine.
He felt the shift of your upper body when you tried to lean up, almost closing the space but hesitant still.
You wanted to kiss him. He can tell and he wanted to kiss you just as bad. This time around there were no interruptions so what was stopping him from leaning into you too?
âHow much did you drink tonight?â Jungkook found himself asking before he could stop himself. It wasnât the right time to ask but he wanted to know if this was just something that happened when you were drunk or could it happen sober too?
âI donât know, I stopped drinking like a while before I got home,â You leaned back, brows furrowed together, âWhy? You drank tonight too?â
âI went home a little after you left,â he admitted. It was around midnight when you left Taehyungâs to go with Mirae and those guys. Heâd barely managed to survive at the party much long after that and called it an early night. Youâd been out longer than he had.
âOkayâŚâ You pushed off of him, feeling his arm loosen around you, âThat was kind of random.â
Jungkook knew he should have stayed quiet. He shouldâve just kissed you and see where things couldâve gone but he had to ruin it. He had to ask you something that was eating at him.
All heâs been able to think about lately is possibly kissing you and this time around he ruined it all on his own.
âY/n,â He poked your side to get your attention but you had your back to him, turned on your side and tuned him out.
You felt stupid for even attempting to kiss him. He pushed you away after what felt like him flirting with you and it was embarrassing. He just sees you as a friend so you have to stop doing this.
With a huff of frustration, he stretched himself out on his side of your bed and stared at the night landscape on your flatscreen. In a few short moments itâd go into sleep mode on its own and the room would go pitch black.
You mustâve been tired, worked up or even a little buzzed still but you fell asleep long before he did. Youâd been so tired you didnât notice when your cell phone fell onto the bed in the space between you and just as he felt himself close to sleep, the screen lit up the room.
Jungkook planned on ignoring it, not caring who mightâve texted but something in him told him to look. Plus, youâd be mad if you woke up in the morning and your phone wasnât charging. He picked it up, eyes squinting at the bright light and read the notification.
namjoon: did u make it home safe ????
Here he was sleeping in your bed while another guy texted you. How dumb is he?
You flirt with him but you donât want him, simple as that and he doesnât know if he could take it anymore. After some contemplation, he carefully got out of your bed and rounded to your side. He found your charger and connected your phone before he left your bedroom quietly and went home before you could wake up.
âŽ
Your office felt oddly cold that following Monday. You spent Sunday holed up in your bedroom trying to figure out what happened over the weekend and youâve somewhat come to terms with it when you texted Jungkook and he chose not to respond.
You werenât in the mood to work but there was nothing you could do about it. The clients you were supposed to meet with postponed the lunch meeting to later in the day so really, you could go home for a while but you also didnât want to. It would make you think about how you almost kissed Jungkook and how he pushed you away and left in the middle of the night like you were some one night stand or something.
âIâm not going out anymore,â You told Jimin as you walked into his office, âI make poor decisions when Iâm under the influence and Iâm done.â
âWhy? I thought you went out with Mirae,â Jimin said swiveling his chair out from under his desk top, âWhich by the way, fuck you both for no invite.â
âIt was last minute,â You told him, leaning against a shelf, âAnd I regret it.â
âWhy?â
âStop asking me questions, I canât explain it,â You whined, covering your ears dramatically which only made your friend roll his eyes.
âYou storm into my office complaining and Iâm not allowed to ask questions? What happened to a positive work environment?â Jimin asked with a scoff.
âItâs hard to explain, it was great when I was with Mirae and Namjoon and Jisoo butâŚâ You bit your lip nervously.
âBut what?â Jimin waited. He knew how your night went because Mirae filled him in on everything. He had known you went to Jungkookâs friendâs place to pregame and if it wasnât the group you were with that left you stressed it had to be Jungkook. You think youâre so secretive about the trials and tribulations of your âfriendshipâ with him.
âNothing,â you sighed out, checking your phone. Maybe you just needed to give it a few days for the embarrassment to go away and youâll be fine again.
Jimin looked at you expectantly, deciding to take a different route for his questions, âSo how was it with Namjoon? Mirae is all Heart Eyes for Jisoo.â
âHuh? Oh, no itâs nothing like that,â You told him honestly, âWe talked yesterday and I donât know, I think itâs obvious weâre good as friends right now.â
âSo no feelings at all?â Jimin asked, watching you shake your head, so he kept pushing, âReally? Have you actually thought about it though? I thought heâd be someone whoâs your type or something.â
You stayed quiet, not bothering to hear him out as you let your mind run rampant. Namjoon is attractive but heâs just a friend and he knows that. If you were not emotionally available you might have given him a better chance but right now you know you feel something for Jungkook. Itâs stupid considering he clearly doesnât want you but it would be unfair to Namjoon if you used him to get over the other.
âŽ
It took over a week for Jungkook to get the courage to talk about you. He wanted you, he wanted you so bad but there was something holding him back. Heâs mad that youâre possibly interested in someone else and heâs pissed that he ruined your chance at kissing. Heâs annoyed with himself for many reasons and the only thing he thought to do was distance himself from you.
Thereâs no point in asking to hang out all the time if youâve got someone youâre interested in, you'd probably rather spend time with.
Throughout the week he found himself joining his other friends and whatever they did instead of seeking you out like usual. If they thought it strange no one had the nerve to question it. It was obvious there was something going on between you and considering Jungkookâs been on edge nobody wanted to push him to know more.
On Tuesday he met up with Yoongi for dinner and surprisingly enough some other people showed upâSera (the girl from the party) being one of them. She talked to him the most like last time and it was clear she was very interested in him. He was flattered but that was it. He was too stuck on you even when you werenât talking.
By the time the weekend rolled back around, Jungkook let himself be dragged to another night out. Yoongi and some of his other friends got him out for a couple drinks at a few bars. He didnât mind it, but it was weird when Sera and others showed up. It felt oddly like a set-up and he wasnât sure what to make of it.
âSo you donât think sheâs hot?â Hoseok asked as he waited at the bar with Jungkook for the round of drinks heâd just ordered. Jungkook looked back at the group finding Sera looking at him but he just looked away.
âSheâs⌠sheâs alright,â Jungkook shrugged his shoulders, âI donât know, not really my type though.â
âWhy? Because sheâs not Y/n?â Hoseok asked with a scoff that made Jungkook roll his eyes. Out of everyone Hoseok was always the main one to point out his relationship with you. It all started when Hoseok made a comment months ago about how he thought you were hot and Jungkook was a little too quick to shut it down. It was weird for him to think of two of his friends going out or talking and Hoseok took that as a sign that Jungkook wanted you⌠which wasnât true.
Anyway, the point is, Hoseok always brings you up around him and tonight was no different.
âWhere is she anyway? I feel like I havenât seen her around in a while,â Taehyung said, appearing out of nowhere holding a drink of his own.
âYou saw her last weekend,â Jungkook told him.
âYeah, but I havenât seen her with you,â Taehyung clarified but Jungkook didnât seem to care anymore. Hoseok nudged Jungkook and with a drink, âLetâs go talk with Sera and maybe you can introduce me to her friend.â
Taehyung let the other two leave and without thinking he grabbed his cell phone and dialed your number.
You were hanging out at Jiminâs place after finishing some work with him and Mirae when Taehyung called, âHello.â
âHey Y/n, where are you? What are you doing?â Taehyung asked looking back at Jungkook who looked tortured to be sandwiched between Sera and Hoseok.
âAt a friendâs place, whatâs up?â You asked looking between your friends who looked back at you with curiosity.
âCome to JJâs Bar, weâre all here,â Taehyung kept it simple. In all honesty, he genuinely likes having you around. Youâre funny and like Jungkook in a way. When Jungkook brought you around it was surprisingly easy to befriend you and youâre someone he likes seeing. He thinks you and Jungkook should get together some dayâif you havenât already. He doesnât understand why it hasnât happened yet when you both clearly want to and okay, he mightâve cut in on that first night but he swears he was drunk. He didnât mean to and since then youâve been distant from each other.
Heâs been trying to invite you since Jungkook wants to be too stubborn to admit he wants you around.
âWhoâs we? Yoongi? Jungkook?â You asked, beginning to gnaw on your bottom lip, âLet me think about it.â
When you hung up, Jimin was the first to speak, âI can drive you.â
âI donât know⌠I havenât really been talking to Jungkook this weekend,â You admitted to making Mirae roll her eyes.
âWe know, but itâs obvious you want to. Youâve been depressed all week,â She said, trying to convince you to be honest about your feelings. Neither one of you wants to admit whatâs going on between you so you just keep going around it. Youâve been off for a couple weeks now and everyone can see it but you two.
At the bar Jungkook was bored. He wasnât in the mood to drink or be out with everyone but he dragged himself along because he had nothing better to do. He wasnât going to stay home staring at his phone or getting FOMO because he missed his friends. He doesnât want to be here but he doesnât want to be home.
Frankly, Jungkook knows where and with who he wants to be but heâs too stupid to pick up his phone and call you.
âJungkook, be honest, are you seeing anyone?â Sera finally asked as she noticed him stare at his phone screen. The bar was dark with colorful lights here and there, packed with people and he was more interested on his phone. Sheâs done everything she can to get him to notice her but it feels like she keeps falling shorts. He talks to her, close to flirting but never all the way, yet she canât tell how he feels. Well, no, she can tell heâs thinking about something else but everyone tells her heâs single. She remembers seeing you at Taehyungâs last weekend, it was the most interested he looked in anything but the two of arenât⌠dating [?] so what was his deal?
âWhat?â He turned with surprise written on his face. Sera was blunt and it caught him off guard.
âWell, I think youâre hot and I want to get to know you but I donât know where your head is at,â Sera said loudly over the music. He was flattered butâŚ
âYou actually came!â Taehyung greeted you warmly, wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug as you found him and the others. You hugged him back and looked at everyone, not remembering him mentioning any of the other women hereâor the one Jungkook was talking to.
âY/n,â Yoongi said hello, âDo you want a drink?â
âUmâŚâ
âI uh,â Jungkook blinked in disbelief as he looked at you just a few feet away from him. He didnât know youâd be here, how? âItâs complicated.â
He tried to sit there and focus on Sera but it was hard. He didnât want to just ditch the girl out of the blue but you havenât spared him a single glance. Itâs like youâre here for his friends but not for him and he didnât like that. Youâre supposed to be his friend not theirs.
You stood back, nervous to greet him. You barely know the girl but what if itâs someone heâs interested in? What if youâre just supposed to be someone he calls when heâs bored and flirts with when no oneâs around? What if youâve read too much into it and let your feelings get involved? You debated approaching him or not especially considering how he left you alone in bed after pushing you away from a kiss. Was it a mistake coming here? Whatâd you even hope could happen?
âJungkook,â You waved, hoping you didnât sound too nervous or bothered while also not sounding too enthusiastic in case that was a girl he was after. You just needed to sound friendly. Thatâs it.
Sera looked between you with peaked curiosity. Sheâd notice his attention had left her a while ago but now she sees why. Jungkook didnât bother looking back at her as he stood up, making his way over to where you stood.
âYou didnât tell me you were coming,â He said shifting his eyes around, âWho invited you?â
âI canât hang around your friends anymore?â You asked bluntly, âWhat do you mean who invited me?â
âI just⌠I didnât knoâshould we get a drink?â His voice shook with anxiety as his hand slipped down your back to lead you to the bar. He wasnât doing anything wrong talking to Sera but for some reason he didnât want the two of you around each otherâespecially after she just told him she was interested.
âIâll probably leave, I donât want to be somewhere Iâm not wanted,â You said bitterly, trying to step away from him but he didnât let you get far from his arms.
âI want you here, of course I do. I just wanted to know who texted you,â Jungkook told you looking at his friends and the only one that was smiling, âTaehyung?â
âYeah, he asked me to come but if itâs going to be a problem Iâll just leave,â You kept saying.
âWhy would it be a problem? Iâve been meaning to text you butâyknow, um,â Jungkook cleared his throat awkwardly, leading you away from the group. Itâs not that he didnât want you around them but he was only comfortable with you right now. He didnât need everyone hearing him.
âAlright, you donât have to explain it,â You brushed him off, turning to the bar and debating if you wanted a drink or not. You werenât in the mood to but now that youâve seen Jungkook with another girl, you might.
âKook, Y/n, want a shot?â Taehyung asked, trying to get you both to go back with everyone.
âIâm driving,â Jungkook said. He had a small sip earlier but heâs not here to drink all night then get stuck Ubering--especially not now that youâre here. What if you go home with him [he means take you home].
âY/n?â He turned to you only and you contemplated. Jungkook bit his lip in thought, tempted to say no on your behalf but he wanted to know what youâd do. Taehyung invited you tonight and last weekend too, why? Heâs happy youâre here but why is Taehyung the one making a move?
âIâm good, Iâll get something else,â You lied, turning away from the group. Part of you wanted to leave then and there but Jimin dropped you off and youâd need to call him back.
Jungkook didnât hesitate to follow you to the bar but you didnât try and order anything. He even asked if you wanted something but you didnât, âJungkook just be honest, should I leave? I know you said you want me here but I donât know⌠if you wanna hang out with your friends or, yknow, other girls I donât want them to get the wrong idea. I just came because I wanted to talk but⌠I donât know.â
âIs it because of Sera? Y/n, I donât like her or anything. I want you here, Iâm sorry for not inviting you,â Jungkook tried to reassure you but you werenât really listening.
âThis isnât about her, itâs you. Youâre the one being confusing, Kook,â You admitted.
âMe?â He looked genuinely taken back, âHow?â
You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest as a shield between you knowing heâd try and pull you closer like he usually did. You werenât the type to argue with someone in public but you were a little annoyed.
âAre we friends? Because if we are donât try and kiss me then ignore me for days and go out with someone elseââ
âAre you serious right now?â He asked, âThatâs what youâre mad about? Youâve been doing that to me for the past few weeks with your friend Namjoon.â
âWhat? Thatâs not true, Iâve told you every time I was gonna hang out with him. You only call me when you think Iâm with someone else,â You told him bitterly.
âYou donât honestly believe that. I call you more than you bother reaching out to me. You only call me when you need a ride or youâre drunk and bored,â Jungkook said, standing a foot away from you so you could hear him better, âYou flirt with me and I think thereâs something there but then you brush me off or go with someone else. Iâve been trying to make things more clear but you make it so hard.â
âI make it hard?â Your jaw nearly dropped, âAlright this is stupid. I donât want to talk about it anymore.â
He knows what youâre doing and he doesnât want to play along. Any time the two of you talk about something a little too complicated you start to backtrack in order to avoid it. No, if you wanted him to be honest you had to let him. After the first night you almost kissed, you didnât message him for a couple days. Heâs the one who reach out to you. This time around heâs the one that left because Namjoon was on your phone and he didnât know what to make of it. He shouldâve asked if anything was serious between the two of you but he was too cowardly to do it and left instead. Maybe you were mad he didnât reach out but why didnât you try? Yes, you came here hopefully looking for him but the second you see him talking to someone else and confront him about it suddenly youâre shutting down?
Whoâs leading who on?
Yoongi saw most of your interaction from across the bar. You werenât full on arguing but itâs obvious the two of you had things you wanted to say but didnât know how. After a while he didnât want to just sit back and ignore it. He at least wanted to know if you were both alright.
When he made his way over he tried asking you again if you wanted a drink or if Jungkook wanted to join him outside. You took that as a sign to make an escape for a moment and rushed to say, âIâm going to the restroom.â
Jungkook was stuck between following and waiting for you or going with Yoongi but his hand trembled with nerves and he needed fresh air. His friend offered him a smoke and he took it reluctantly knowing youâd hate the smell of it on him. Even when heâs sort of upset with you he canât make himself do something you donât like.
âWhat are you guys fighting about?â Yoongi asked taking the cigarette Jungkook rejected and lit one for himself.
âItâs stupid,â Jungkook mumbled under his breath.
âClearly not when you look worked up,â Yoongi said, âTell me.â
âThereâs been a couple times that we almost kissed and I thought she was talking to someone else but now sheâs acting upset with me and I donât know why. Iâm not doing anything, the other night we almost kissed again but I couldnât bring myself to do it and then the guy texts her. I didnât know Taehyung asked her to come and now she thinks I donât want her here and probably thinks Iâm into Sera but Iâm not,â Jungkook began to let it all out, hands running through his hair nervously.
Yoongi couldnât hide the look of surprise on his face over the fact that you guys had never kissed before. It was sort of a running joke between all of them that youâre both secretly hooking up but it appears not to be the case. You both had been good friends until then and all the bottled up emotions are finally begging to be let out. It made him chuckle over how dumb it was.
âDid you bother to ask her about him? Actually ask and not make assumptions like you always do?â Yoongi asked, âBecause honestly, I think youâre both into each other and donât know what to do about it.â
âYou donât get it hyung, I canât just ask Y/n thatâŚâ Jungkook groaned with frustration, âIâm being so pathetic, arenât I?â
âA little. You pay for a parking spot specifically for Y/n and sheâs not even your girlfriend. You want her to be so just talk it out.â
âIâm gonna talk to her,â Jungkook bit his lip, watching Yoongi finish up and ask him if we was ready to go back in. When he did, you were standing there talking to Sera and he wasnât sure what it could be about.
Honestly, it was nothing to worry about. She saw you looking clueless after your restroom break and introduced herself as one of Yoongiâs friends. Although you wanted to ask her about Jungkook she didnât even bring him up. When he went up to you both but placed a dominant hand around your waist.
It answered what Sera already knew, that he was claimed for even if neither of you said it. His heart was with you.
âAre you mad at me?â He asked suddenly, âFor the other night?â
âNo, Iâm confused,â You let him turn you in his arms so that you faced him, âI thought you wanted to kiss but then you stop it and when I wake up youâre gone. Itâs fine if you just want to be friends but donât lead me on like that.â
For a moment he wasnât sure what to say. He didnât think youâd say it so bluntly but you did. Youâve been thinking about those Almost Kisses youâve shared just as much as he has. He just didnât expect you to be thinking he was leading you on. He thought you were leading him on.
âIâm not⌠Can we go and talk somewhere?â He asked, trying to take your hand in his but you rejected his advance. Once again you probably looked like a couple arguing and it was so stupid.
âI just wanna go,â You told him and to keep you from leaving he pushed his keys into your hands.
âLetâs go then,â He said. You looked at him with a small smile, feeling somewhat upset with him but also unsure what to do. Part of you wanted to leave on your own but you also wanted to hear him out.
You pushed them back into his hand with a sigh, âNo, youâre here with your friends, I shouldnât have even bothered.â
âY/n, I donât care I wanna leave with you, letâs go,â He turned to his friends, not bothering to get closer as he began to wave, âIâm gonna call it a night guys, Y/nâs taking me home.â
âKook,â You couldnât help but whine. He just smiled, leading you out the club and you learned he wasnât kidding. He really was making you take him home in his own car, hoping itâd keep you from parting ways with him tonight.
âI didnât know it seemed like I was leading you on,â Jungkook said, almost sounding bitter at the thought of it. He slumped back in the passengerâs seat staring out at the dark city lights trying to process what you time him not too long ago.
You didnât say anything and that made him turn to you, âYouâre the one thatâd ditch me for that Namjoon guy.â
âI didnât ditch you, every single time you asked me about him and I tried telling you how it was, youâd stop me,â You reminded him, thinking back to every time heâd bring up someone else and ignore every time you told him it wasnât anything serious, âAnd how was I not supposed to think you were leading me on? One second you act like you want to kiss and the next youâre pushing me away.â
âIâm not saying youâre wrong about how I acted but it was because I was jealous. You knew I was jealous I just kept acting like I wasnât and look at where we are now. Youâre mad at me,â Jungkook shook his head, âAnd I want to kiss you. I think about kissing you all the time and that nightâthose nights⌠I regret not doing it but sometimes I canât read you.â
âI never know where your headâs at. One second youâre in my arms and I think thereâs something between us but then you⌠I donât know, I feel like you know Iâll always be around,â He admitted, looking out his window to avoid your sudden stare.
The rest of the ride was silent and though Jungkook could tell there was a lot on your mind you werenât saying any of it. He feels more assured now knowing that you felt the same way he did but itâs like going in circles talking about this. He just wants to get you in his arms and act like you both havenât made it more complicated than it needs to be.
When you parked his car in the lot of his apartment, you turned the engine off and turned to face him, confused on what to do now. Do you sleep over or get yourself a ride home? Jungkook had pushed his seat back to get more comfortable but now it felt like you were farther from him than he liked. You looked back to find him already staring at you. His eyes fell to the way you nervously licked your lips and he couldnât take it anymore.
The sound of his belt unbuckling caught you off guard you almost missed how he leant forward so suddenly you nearly pulled back. His lips collided with yours with such need that you met with equal eagerness. He slipped his hand down your hair toward your neckline keeping you from pulling back. Jungkook doesnât know how to describe the kiss.
It was good, better than he imagined but was it the kiss or just you? Was it the fact that was finally getting a taste of you? You leaned forward, bumping into the middle console to kiss him a little harder, tongues meeting in a wet, tender way that had you gasping lightly. If this was what was on your mind for so long, you now knew why. Kissing him felt good, felt different and you didnât want to stop.
âInside,â He tried to say between kisses but he found it hard to pull away. The word just came out in an airy whisper, struggling to find sound.
He pulled back with a small groan, hand in your hair and forehead pressed against yours as he tried to catch his breath, âLetâs go inside, please?â
Your small nod was enough for him to storm out of the car, rounding to your side and helping you out of the car, leading you up. Up the stairs he stopped every now and then to plant a small kiss on your shoulder or neck, arms around your waist.
âDonât like when youâre mad at me,â Jungkook said, unlocking his door and taking you in, âAnd I was jealous about Namjoon, so stupidly jealous because he texted you and I saw it on your phone anââ
âThereâs nothing going on between us,â You assured him, âAnd I was never mad at you. I thought you didnât want meââ
âCrazy, youâre crazy to think that,â Jungkook cupped your face in his hands, âYouâre the only one I want and Iâm sorry I didnât make it more clear.â
You smiled, arms around his neck as he hoisted you up so he could kiss you better and walk toward his living room, âMe too.â
He carried you to the couch, taking a seat and pulling you onto his lap with ease. You didnât hesitate to make yourself comfortable, leaning down to kiss him as his hands moved up your waist. He let you take the lead for a little bit, head tilted to the side when you kissed near his ear making a small smile appear on his face. His ears were sensitive and everyone knew that. Whenever you tried whispering something in his ear, heâd practically have to shove you away or itâd make goosebumps form on his skin. Now youâre kissing up his ear lobe and he was sinking into the couch pulling you with him.
A light frown left his lips when he felt you nip at his lobe with your teeth and his head fell forward, nearly bumping your shoulder making him tug on your neckline to kiss your exposed collarbone. You lifted his chin with a light finger touch and met him with a kiss. His hands slipped under your top, feeling along your smile like heâs done before. He likes to feel how warm you are under his fingertips, like to feel your natural curves. You liked the way his rough hands felt against your sides when he ran his hands up, nearly touching your chest before tracing them back down.
Jungkook couldnât hide his growing erection when you pressed down against his lap. It didnât help that you were licking along his bottom lip tugging on it with your teeth until you were tongue kissing. He sat straighter, hands itching to rip your top off. Heâs seen you in sultry outfits that made his head turn everytime and heâs interested to see what was under.
âKook,â You sighed softly, pulling away from the sloppy kiss to catch your breath. Your lips felt number and swollen and his did too. He was so damn kissable and you canât believe you havenât done this yet. What were you so worried about all this time? He looked at you with these spark in his eyes and lip between his teeth, hands around your waist and bulge pressed against you. You looked down at his lap, shifting back a little before grinding forward again. A deep groan caught in his throat when you did it and he looked at you hopefully.
âYouâre so hot,â Your hands ran along his lean shoulders down toward the bottom of his shirts and helped you yank it off of him without a second thought. Youâve seen him shirtless countless of times, in person and on the phone. Youâve felt his body when heâs rolled over in his sleep to cuddle and it doesnât ever leave your mind how attractive your friend is. You remember when he first started getting his tattoos done and when he first started boxing. He got so much stronger and his tattoos just got so much hotter.
You leaned forward, kissing softly against his neck, hands feeling up his abs and hip bucking into him. His hands guided your hips against him, hard dick feeling constricted in his jeans and when you kissed near his pecs he released a light moan.
âStop, youâre going to drive me insane if you donât,â He groaned, hands pulling on your top.
âYou want me stop?â You asked, grinding down on him. You were starting to feel needy and aroused. If he wanted you to stop, maybe you should before you take it too far.
âNo,â Jungkook finally yanked your top off you, catching your lips with his, tongue searching the inside of your mouth, âDonât want you to.â
His hands wandered south, inching up the small fitted skirt you wore tonight. Last time he saw you in something revealing was when youâd gone off to see Namjoon wearing a dress. He remembered eyeing you closely wishing you werenât leaving and wondering if youâd dressed up for someone else. Now youâre grinding down on him with your skirt bunch around your hips, bucking into him with a thin pair of panties on and it drove him insane. His jeans were in the way of letting him feel your head against him and he couldnât take it. A small squeal left your lips when he swiftly turned you to lie on the couch, trapped underneath him with your legs around his waist.
Jungkook kept his hardened dick in his pants, pressed between your spread legs as he kissed down your neck, leaving love bites behind while his hands began to trace your sides. You breathed heavily in anticipation when he tugged your bra down exposing your breasts over the cups and he didnât hesitate to keep going. His touch was eager as he licked between them, cupping your right boob with his hand while kissing the other. He sucked your hardened nipple into his, humping his erection against your clit. You released a small moan when he ran his tongue around your bud, lost in himself Jungkook groaned when you pulled on his hair softly.
You snuck a hand between your bodies and reached for his belt. The jeans felt rough against your wet panties but it also felt good to have something to bump into. In all honesty, you liked grinding against him but you need more.
Now.
Jungkook lifted his body up slightly, not bothering to break away from worshiping you in kisses and helped you unbuckle his belt.
âYou want it?â Jungkook asked in a husky whisper, throat sore and lust in his eyes. You nodded your head watching him sit back on his haunches, using his skilled fingers to undo it the rest of the way and tug the zipper down. He kicked them off without much or a care for the things on his coffee table and with his other hand, he held your hips, âSay it.â
A soft whine left your lips as you got the hint and turned onto your stomach, your head so close to the armrest of the couch and knees digging into the cushion below you. Youâve been in this living room a hundred times but never thought youâd be in this position. He pulled your panties down with ease, not bothering with the skirt as he pulled it up so it was around your waist and gave him a perfect view of what you looked like bent over. He couldnât help but place a hand on the round of your ass, fingers digging into the soft flesh with his bottom lip pulled between his teeth.
Jungkook was pathetically desperate for you and couldnât find it in himself to pull away enough to pull his briefs all the way down. Instead, he lowered them enough for his hard cock to spring free. You hadnât said anything yet, seemingly stuck in a lust filled daze, arms using the side of the couch for support. He could see the slick lining your pretty cunt and he needed to be closer. He lined his member up with your files, grinding against you and feeling your wetness coat his member in arousal.
You released a moan, arching your back into the couch and ass back on him, âI want it.â
His cock twitched with need when you said it in your usual whiny tone. The tone you use when you call him late at night because youâre bored or annoyed with him. Jungkook nodded his head even though you couldnât see him, he used a hand on your hips and the other in his length to catch the small hook of your entrance. You were so unbelievably wet that his dick was covered, it made guiding the tip of his cock against your wet pussy better.
âYouâre so wet, baby, fuck,â Jungkook groaned, palming your ass as you waited so prettily for him to just fuck you already.
He can tell you were getting impatient by the way you shook your hips side to side and he couldnât help but smile. Feeling warmth burst through his chest he leant over your body, resting his arm next to yours and kissed your neck. Without another word, he pressed his face against your hair and thrusted forward. With just the first thrust, you felt the stretch of your walls around his girth. It hurt for only a few seconds as you took him in and you lifted your head, stopped by how Jungkook hugged you from behind.
âOh,â You gasped turning your head to look at him and he caught your open lips with a tongue kiss that made you relax against him. It took him a moment before he pushed the rest of his length into your tight pussy with a grunt.
Once he felt you relax, he tried to sit back, thrusting into you with care trying to adjust. You pushed back against his length, meeting his thrusts until you caught a steady rhythm and Jungkookâs fingers dug into your hips, watching the way you looked as he fucked you from behind in his living room. You felt so good to him. Your walls tightened around him deliciously making his head tip back losing himself to the feeling. âRight there.â
At this angle with your back down and ass up, his dick felt your innermost walls clench, he felt the curve of your pelvis and your butt felt soft.
âFuck,â your head fell against the arm rest trying to keep up with your pace but he was bigger than you ever couldâve thought of. Youâve felt a hint of it before but to have him inside you making your body shiver with need it was hard to focus on your movements. Jungkook could feel you slow down as you felt the pleasure build up inside you. It brought him back to attention and with more assertive energy, he placed a hand on your ass and the other on your lower back, making sure you stayed in position so he could fuck you.
Your jaw dropped when his strokes changed making him reach deeper inside you. This position always made you feel dirty in a good way and left you a moaning mess, letting him slam his hips into you. Swear beaded his forehead, fucking you chasing his and your pleasure.
âSo good, so fucking good,â He groaned, arm circling around your waist and lowering more of his hips into you. The tip of his cock hit that good spot deep inside that made you want to clench your eyes shut.
âKoo,â You tried to get out more of his name but it was harder to hold yourself together, fucking back onto his dick with eagerness, needy whimpers leaving your lips. You pushed against the armrest trying to stand up a little, itching to be closer to him.
You didnât even need to tell him anything, he pulled your back against his chest until your were nearly sitting back on his dick, grinding against him, taking every inch he gave you. He placed a hand on your navel, keeping you flush to his body, dropping needy kisses on your neck knowing itâd leave love bites in their wake.
Your orgasm began to build up inside you, so close to popping and it made you a little more pliant to take whatever he gave you. You fucked yourself back onto him while his other hand groped your tits, listening to his whispers of need in your ear telling you how good youâre taking it.
âJust like that, cum for me,â Jungkook said with a deep rasp to his usual delicate tone. Itâs like he wanted to walk you through it and fuck, it was working.
The moment your cunt clamped down around his dick leaving him to hiss through gritted teeth, he knew you were going to cum. He let you fuck yourself to release, whining in his arms and legs shaking as he held you up.
He slowed his hips, keeping himself to the hilt inside you feeling the way your orgasm made your body tremble for him. Your pussy was dripping around his length and he was tracing soothing lines against your spine as you fell back to the couch trying to catch your breath, âGood girl.â
His words had a clear effect on you still as your pussy twitched, making him smile. He never took you as the type to like pet names but he knew you liked to be praised. Well, he knew you hated being scolded but usually you listened to him when he did. Now he knows praising you feels a lot better.
Jungkook sucked in a tight breath as he began to pull out his aching member, worried youâd be feel uncomfortable right now. The need to cum was so heavily set into his body but he wasnât stupid. He knew he wasnât wearing any protection and though thereâs a chance youâre taking anything, he wasnât going to risk losing himself inside you. A little whine left your lips as he slipped out and you couldnât help but look back at him with furrowed brows.
âYou good?â He asked with concern, caressing your side lovingly. You didnât say anything, turning to sit up and wrap your arms around him. He groaned when you rubbed against his cock on accident and you looked down at it immediately.
He caught your stare and smiled, âCan we finish this somewhere else? The couch is a little too smallâŚâ
You laughed, âThereâs more?â
You were teasing him and you both knew it which only made him roll his eyes playfully. With a swift move, he lifted you up, carrying you to the bathroom catching you by surprise, âYou didnât think we were done yet did you? What about me?â
âŽ
A MONTH LATER
âYou guys are so bad at hiding it,â Mirae said as she sat in the packed booth of your friends, all watching you hold hands under the table. You looked at her with feigned innocence, shoving Junhkookâs hand off your thigh.
âHiding what?â You asked, looking at everyone around. Taehyung sat on one end, Yoongi next to him, Jimin there and Mirae too. They all looked equally unimpressed but your act but it was somewhat funny.
Jungkook tried to hide a grin but he was so bad at it. He smiled at you warmly, âTold you.â
âItâs your fault, I bet we couldâve hid it a little longer if you didnât smile,â You tried to say but even you didnât believe yourself. Jungkook didnât even bother to look guilty as he broke out in a laugh. Yoongi chuckled, looking at the way Jungkookâs cheeks flushed red when you looked at him a little too long.
âI knew the second Y/n stopped coming to work all moody because she wasnât talking to Jungkook,â Jimin pointed out and Mirae agreed quickly.
Hoseok sighed, âI knew when Jungkook stopped giving me killer workouts at the gym. I almost broke my shoulder.â
âWhoa, Iâm a great personal trainer,â Jungkook put a hand to his chest, âDonât come at my profession.â
âIâm not, Iâm pointing out the fact that you were always moodier when you didnât see Y/n,â Hoseok argued.
Jungkook couldnât even deny it so he didnât try. Instead he place his hand back down on your thigh and leaned into you to share the dinner menu, âAre you gonna try something new? Youâre picky.â
âI might want to expand my horizons,â You looked over everything with a concentrated expression.
He raised an amused brow at you, surprised when the server came around and you actually did try something new. He let the others go before him and when it came to being his turn, he ordered your usual.
âAre you switching it up too?â The server asked, all too familiar with the two of you and your eating preferences.
âItâs in case she doesnât like it,â He admitted with a sly wink in your direction. You hit his arm playfully and turned toward your friends who glared at you grossly.
âIâm losing my appetite,â Jimin teased, looking at Mirae as she texted away on her phone, âYou?â
âKinda, I donât know, Jisoo just asked what Iâm doing,â Mirae said.
Jungkook looked up with slight interest. He tried not to be the jealous type but⌠Jisoo is friends with Namjoon. Heâs met the guy now and heâs not that bad but heâs also way taller than him with a bulkier physique.
âWhat is he doing? Tell him and his friends join us,â Jungkook said suddenly making her furrow her brows at him.
âHe wants to see Namjoon again, I think heâs got a little crush on him,â You told her, making him shrug.
âThe guy is built,â he said, âI just wanna know what pre-workout he takes.â
âAnd to think you spent all this time not liking him because you didnât like Y/n talking to him,â Taehyung said, feeling the need to bring up the awkward part. You glared at him but he only smiled mischievously.
âHey, letâs move on from that,â You said leaning against Jungkook who pulled you closer, âWeâre all just friends.â
âExcept you two, so can you just say youâre dating already and we can go on with the usual?â Yoongi asked impatiently.
âI thought you said we were bad at hiding it,â your boyfriend sat up, pulling you into his arms giving you a tight hug and looked at his friends, âBut fine, this is my best friend and girlfriend.â
âWhoa, I thought I was your best friend now. Y/n canât have both titles,â Taehyung scoffed, sitting up, âI practically brought you two together. I mean yeah I was fucked up that first night but once I caught on I was the one always inviting Y/n over.â
âIâm the one who told Jungkook to get his head out of the gutters and talk to Y/n,â Yoongi said with a raised finger to state a point.
âNot to join in on the fight but⌠I also tried getting Y/n to talk about Jungkook and drove her to JJâs the other night,â Jimin leaned forward to say and suddenly they were all arguing over who brought the two of you together.
It was stupid but friendly and it made you laugh with amusement.
âIâm not the jealous type, right?â Jungkook asked you as he thought about what Taehyung said earlier instead of their current banter, âI didnât care that you talked to Namjoon⌠I just, y'know I didnât want you to like him, thereâs a difference.â
His face looked confused in a surprisingly cute way for your motorcycle riding, tattoo covered boyfriend and it made you smile. âOf course youâre not the jealous type.â
Jungkook smiled back warmly, leaning into you for a quick kiss.
When your food arrived you regretted ordering it just like he knew you would and he switched you plates like he knew he would. Aside from the obvious displays of affection nothing else changed for the two of you. Or at least you donât think it did.
He still came over whenever he felt like it and you bothered him at any hour of the day. When he wasnât sleeping in your bed trying to keep you from going to work he was checking his phone for a text from you throughout the day.
Youâre not sure if itâs because he was your friend first but your relationship with Jungkook was a perfect mix of love and affection with ease and playfulness.
Your best friend was the one for you and heâd been right in front of you the whole time.
::.
NO PART TWO
two fics in two months??? who do I think I am đ
honestly I kinda liked this friendly little vibe. I wanted more angst but idkkk. they kinda gave toxic but not like super hide red flag toxic. theyâre in their twenties yall đ
Iâm preparing for this angsty yandere fic for Taehyung so I wanted to something a little softer, slice of life vibe
anyways like always, love feedback so tell me what you think!
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đđđđ đđđđ, đđđđđđđ!- đđđđđđđ đđđđđ đ đđđđđđ
word count 4.8k
content warning a little bit of spiciness, false positive pregnancy mention, black reader friendly
authorâs note hi. i suffered through writerâs block these past three months but BOOM mouthwashing and fanart of this fine ass man popped up on my fyp. iâve watched two playthroughs of this game, so i hope i captured the right image of curly. oh and heâs australian here. and my requests are open!
synopsis on a study abroad trip, you meet another (handsome) study abroad student who talks his way into your heart and ends up being a key part of your life
Winter in London was not up to your standards.
You were here on a study abroad trip for your master's program. You did the whole overseas thing during one quarter during your time as an undergrad - it was a little visit to South Africa which you thoroughly enjoyed. But âtravel some more,â everyone said.
After a lot of thinking, you gave in and decided to travel to the U.K. as you wanted something that felt familiar. You were wrong in so many ways - the roads followed unnecessary loops, plugs were shaped unusually, and...oh, every drink there was some sort of 'diet' or 'zero sugar' crap.
But over time, this place began to feel like a routine. It wasn't home but you were okay. You liked the opportunity to grow in your program and you liked your classmates. Everything was balanced - school, eat, chat, sleep.
Except for one particular day after your classes, a few of your classmates insisted you go to a pub with them. Something about 'getting you more exposed to the London culture'. After much pestering, you indulged.
So you found yourself at this pub but not as excited as the people who invited you. Over time, they were engulfed in their own conversations and inside jokes and you were off to the side, whiskey in front of you, own your own. It's weird to drink when the people who are supposed to have your back don't.
"Enjoying yourself?"
Oh boy, were you about to have your first unwanted encounter in London?
You look over your shoulder and see this strikingly tall man, his head full of bright hair. His shy smile
is highlighted by his stubble. Your eyes soften for a moment and the tension in your shoulders fades.
But then it returns. "I'm enjoying myself. Thank you. I'm with my...my classmates." Your tone is sharp. You gesture to your classmates, who are still in their own world.
"You're American? Are you sure these people know you?" He asks. You pause, trying to find a witty answer of your own. Part of you wanted to point out his thick accent as it wasn't as posh as the Londoners. Maybe Australian. You think for a while but you're still stuck.
"Curly." He extends his hand to you. You shake it.
"Your name is Curly?" you ask curtly. "And I'm supposed to feel bad about my situation?"
He chuckles at your response, his face settling into a smirk. "My name is Grant. Everyone just calls me Curly."Â He swirls his glass, eyeing the empty barstool next to you. "Do you mind if I sit with you?"
You look him over noticing his muscular build once more. "I don't mind." He swings his leg over the seat and rests his forearms on the counter. Curly takes you in for a moment. You take this time to take note of his eyes - a shade of deep blue. He's sort of cute, you think.
"So, why exactly is an American girl like you here in London?" And it all goes away. You find yourself a little annoyed with his question as it's yet another variation of the same question you've heard since you arrived here.
"You ask that like I'm not supposed to be here. It's not like the United Kingdom is some sort of war zone," you respond. He raises his right hand in defense. "I'm studying abroad for a quarter. I'm a grad student," you finally answer. "You don't sound like you're from here either. What's your deal?"
"Well, I'm here for school too." He downs the rest of his drink. "Masters too actually. I'm trying to go to space."
"Still doesn't explain the accent," you cut in.
"Well, my father's Aussie and my mother's from here. They separated years ago and I spent most of my life in Australia with my Pa and spent time with my mother when I wasn't in school. She moved to the States after the divorce. I decided I'd pursue my college education in America and have been there since."
"So you're here studying abroad as well," you state. He nods and then gestures to someone behind him. "That's Jimmy. I like to think we've been attached to the hip for the longest time."
This Jimmy he speaks of is on the opposite side of the bar, socializing. "I'm really happy we got to take this trip together. He made my breaks great. I was really bummed that the person I considered my best friend lived on the other side of the world but the great thing about adulthood is the lack of limitation."
You laugh at his comment and he gives you a confused look. "As an adult, I feel that there are so many limitations. Especially as we get older."
"Well, it's up to you if you let those limitations run your life. You have free will, you know, and...and you typically only live once." He places a hand on your arm and it slowly runs down to your elbow. Your eyes are locked now.
"My name is Y/N."
"I like that."
You like the weight of his hand and you like his eyes and you like his hair. He seems like a cute guy and he has such a cute name - Grant Curly. What a cute face.
"Hey Curly." The moment is broken by an unfamiliar voice but a familiar face. The Jimmy guy. "It's getting late and we have shit to do. You think you can stop flirting and leave now." He pauses and looks at you. "No offense."
You're taken aback and not sure of what to say but you respect him for keeping his friend in check...but maybe not with that tone. You look behind you and see that your classmates have left you. So much for adults.
"You're right. I lost track of time," Curly admits sheepishly. He looks at you first, then at Jimmy. "This is Y/N."
"Great. Nice to meet you, Y/N." You wait for a handshake or something. "Let's go now." Jimmy starts to walk away from where you're both sitting.
"Sorry about him. He's nice! I promise!" Curly rubs his neck nervously. "How are you getting home? Going back with your friends?"
"They left. I'll have to call a cab or something," you say. He looks over at Jimmy, who's exiting the pub, and then back at you. "I'll take you back home. What's your address?"
"It's okay. Your friend...he doesn't seem receptive. And besides, I can take care of myself," You answer. You start to rummage through your purse and pull out your wallet to pay for your drink. Curly gently holds your wrist. Your breath hitches at the electrifying feeling. "Let me pay for your drink and take you home," he starts, "I know you're definitely capable of taking care of yourself but it'd kill me if I left you alone."
You look away from him for a moment and think. This was your opportunity to get his number. "Okay...I'll pay for the drink and you can take me home," you offer. He shakes his head and gestures to the bartender. "Please put this lady's drink on my tab," he says. Curly pulls out his wallet, then his card, and slides it over to the bartender. You lightly slap his arm in protest. "Why would you do that?"
He just smirks at you before taking back his card and receipt. "Let's go." He offers his hand to you to help you off the barstool but you playfully swat it away before plopping off.
Curly leads you outside to the parking lot and clicks the unlock button on his keys. His friend is leaning against the car and you take note of the fact that he was rushing Curly when he didn't even own a car himself.
"What is she doing here?" He asks. "Jimmy, we're dropping her off. You think you could move to the back so the pretty lady can sit up front?" His friend asks.
Jimmy gets off of the car and mumbles something illegible under his breath. You feel bad so you say something, âHe can sit-"
Curly cuts you off, "No, no, you sit down." He opens the passenger seat for you and you slide inside.
Something you noticed about the two friends was how opposite they were; Jimmy was clearly someone who didn't like too much change and you assumed that Curly lacked any anxiety. They seem to balance each other out...maybe?
As you conversed with Curly about your respective lives, you couldn't help but notice Jimmy's eyes piercing your image through the rear view mirror.
âHi love." You feel so much relief when Curly's lips meet yours. You can't help but melt against him. It felt so good to have him in your home.
The two of you had decided to go long-distance months after you met in London. Curly was based in Colorado; his mother lived there, it was where he attended school and he loved it so much because of the snow. It seemed like whenever you called, he was on some sort of mountain or on his way there. While you were living in California, where there wasn't much of that, Curly claimed it reminded him so much of home - so he didnât mind you living there.
After your first meeting, you regularly hung out and spoke over the phone. Sometimes you both were lucky to be alone; he'd take you out to lunch or take you to tourist sights in London. Sometimes you'd spend time in his flat and Jimmy would be there. The latter wouldn't say much but you always felt like he never really wanted you around. When he did speak to you, your conversations would start somewhat simple and then he'd say something to kill the mood.
One night as your school's study abroad program came to an end, Curly showed up at your flat without any notice. The Curly you saw that night wasn't the one you were getting to know all this time - he was much more bashful than ever. Not the type of bashful when Jimmy tries to embarrass him but bashful in the sense that he was well into his twenties, almost 30, and was struggling to find the words to confess to you. Luckily for him, he didn't need to completely contextualize as you felt the same way.
"How is work, baby?" You ask him. He came to California as it was his turn to take the flight to see you.
"Same old, same old." He started working for some space freighter company months before he met you; you only heard about it once you got back to the States. You weren't too sure about the whole thing but he was making money and getting practice for the career he really wanted.
You pull away from his chest and take his image in. "I missed you so so much." Curly pulls you closer to him so that he can kiss you again. This time it's a bit longer. He pulls away looks behind himself to find your couch and leads you to it without bumping into anything.
He sits first and invites you to crawl onto his lap. Once you're settled, he grabs your thighs and you take hold of his shoulders, kissing him again. His hands roam from your thighs to your back before finding themselves under your shirt. At the feel of your bra, he asks, "Oh, what's this?"
You feel your cheeks heating up at his playfulness. "Why don't you take my shirt off and find out?"
Taking this as permission, Curly unclasps your bra and moves his hands to your shirt; you raise your arm as he pulls the bottom of your shirt off. Once it's been discarded, your bra slightly falls off your chest and Curly does you the honor of taking it off of you.
He lets the back of his hand run lightly against your nipple and you can't help but mewl a bit. "Missed me?" He asks. You nod. "Every single day."
"I think about you a lot. At work, at home, when I'm outside. It's hard knowing that I have such a pretty darling on the other side of the country." He brings one of your breasts to his lips and wraps his lips around your nipple, where his tongue dances around. He pulls his lips away with a 'pop'. "Grant," you let out breathlessly.
"I think about doing you at my desk, on my bed, everywhere." He lowers you down on the couch and adjusts himself so that he's on top of your lower half. "I think I'll take you on this couch and maybe if you're up to it, on your island counter next, and then after-"
He's cut off by a vibration in his pocket. "Just a moment, it's probably work," he says, pulling out his phone. You notice a slight annoyance on his face when he reads the Caller ID.
"Jimmy, hi." Speak of the devil. At the sound of his name, you shuffle to sit up on the couch. Curly puts a hand out to stop you but you swat it away.
"No, Jimmy, I didn't eat your pickles. Have you tried looking around the fridge?"
You reach next to him to pull your shirt and bra out of the crevice of the couch.
"You found them- no, I landed here hours ago."
You clasp your bra and put your shirt back on.
"I'm sorry that - Jimmy!" You jump at the volume of Curly's voice. He sees this, places a hand on your knee and mouths an apology. "Look, I'm sorry I didn't call you. I just got here. I'm with my girlfriend- huh? Ok. I'll talk to you later. Bye Jimbo." He then hangs up. Curly sits back on his knees. He brushes his hair back with his hand and releases a sigh before placing both hands on his knees and looking at you. "Sorry. Just Jimmy."
"I don't like him." You give him a pointed look. You cross your arms, obviously disappointed that his idiot friend ruined your time with your man. You're aching for him but at the same time, you don't even want to fuck Curly anymore.
"I think he's a nice bloke," Curly says under his breath. You raise your eyebrows, practically asking him to speak up. "It's like you guys are the brother and sister that hate each other for fun. You'll both come around eventually."
Your face twists in disgust and you fake gag, which makes Curly laugh. "What brother is deeply in love with their sibling, you in this case?" you question, "He clearly wants me out of the way."
"No, he doesn't. He loves you!" You can see Curly's face melt into confusion. "Maybe not love you...but he likes you around?"
You scoff. "See, you don't even know yourself." You wiggle your legs from under Curly and get up off the couch. He reaches for your hand. "You don't know want to...?" He cocks his head toward the couch.
You purse your lips and shake your head no.
"So gorgeous!"
"How many karats?"
"The proposal! What was it like?"
One year and a few months after your meeting, Curly decided to propose. He took you to Australia to meet his paternal side. In truth, you were scared of those big-ass Australian spiders and whatever the hell else happened to live there but your love for Curly was stronger. The night before your flight back home, he planned a candlelight dinner for the both of you in his father's home and proposed to you - your answer obviously being 'yes!'.
Today you were at your wedding shower with all your friends - Jimmy too!
"How do you feel about getting married after just a year of knowing each other? I mean, Grant can't possibly know everything about you in a year!"
Curly's mother was a piece of work. You had met her a handful of times during your trips to Colorado and yet you couldn't seem to just get along. You were polite but she always had something to say. There was some attachment to her son but he was her only one so you let it slide.
"Well...you do know we're getting older. I fell in love with him and have been since I met him. I feel that Curly-"
"Grant. His name is Grant," she interrupts.
You take a deep breath and smile a forced one. "Grant. I feel that he and I can be mature adults and grow and learn about our marriage and what makes it work." Part of you wants to mention why her marriage didn't work out but one of had to be the bigger woman.
Mrs. Former Curly hums trying to find some witty response. "Is the Bride-to-be avoiding me?" You let out a sigh of relief and you never thought you'd do it to this particular voice.
"Jimmy! Nice to see you, hun!" Curly's mom moves past you to hug Jimmy and kiss him on the cheek. For once, Curly's friend looks cleaned up compared to the other times you've seen him.
When Curly's mom pulls away, he looks over at you. "I wanted to pull Y/N aside. Haven't gotten to properly congratulate her on the engagement. I can catch up with you before I head home," Jimmy tells her.
After the engagement, Curly decided to move in with you. It was a decision you were confused by; you were easily willing to pack up your bags and move to Colorado with him. You knew he loved the snow and his mom would probably lose his shit if he was so far but he insisted on moving in with you.
At first, he wouldn't tell you the truth, something about high housing prices and about wanting to explore more. Eventually, he told you he wanted to get away from Jimmy. He opened up to his friend about the idea of getting engaged - showed him the ring and everything. It turned into an argument about you being the right choice and Jimmy low-key insulting you. After he told you the truth, you let Curly move in before the wedding.
Over time, Jimmy apologized to Curly and even extended an apology to you and the two got closer again. Although they weren't best buddies, it didn't sit right with you how quickly Curly took Jimmy back as a friend. Maybe Mrs. Former Curly was on to something.
"How have you been, Jimmy? Has living alone served you well?" You ask. He makes a funny face at you. Were you making a dig at him?
"It's fine. I actually got a new roommate. He's pretty chill. Keeps to himself." Jimmy avoids eye contact for a second. "How's living with Curly? I know he's ecstatic but are you?"
Living with Curly was great, especially when Jimmy was briefly out of your lives; uninterrupted cuddles, uninterrupted dinner, uninterrupted sex. You were living the life!
Instead, you answer, "Living with Curly is great. He's lovely. He's the best roommate and fiancĂŠ I could ever ask for."
Jimmy's trying to keep a light demeanor but he truly couldn't. "You know, I hope you're really right about that. Hopefully, he doesn't drop you like a sack of potatoes...although, I hope he does. I really really hope he does. You don't deserve any of this."
Your face drops and for once he's left you silent. Jimmy smirks when he realizes he's really hurt you. "Congratulations again, princess," he says before walking off.
You feel your body buzzing and you just want to cry but everyone - your family, friends, Curly - are all gawking over you and you don't want to set any alarms off. You want to find Curly but you know at the sight of him, you'd burst into tears.
You eventually find the strength to walk out of the party - passing by with polite 'excuse me's and 'just a moment's. You take a moment to feel the breeze. It picks up and your breath struggles but once it slows down, an entire weight is off your shoulders.
You decide to sit in the car. A tired heavy sigh escaped you. You noticed your fiancĂŠ left his winter jacket in the car and used it as a blanket.
For a moment, you wanted to cry but you had all this makeup and didn't want others to realize that you were upset. But besides that, you didnât have the urge. Why couldnât you cry?
You chalked it up to space. You needed to be away from Curly's petty mom. You needed to be away from Jimmy and his weird attachment to your fiancĂŠ. You both needed space for this whole thing to work out.
A shadow hovers over the window and you turn your head to see Curly, who lifts his finger to knock on the window. You open the passenger seat door and before allowing him to speak, you start first.
"Sit."
He doesn't argue and walks around the car to sit in the driver's seat. "Babe, what's going-"
"I can't do this, Grant." You can see his eyes and panicking and his mouth trying to find the right words. He grabs your hands and lets out an incoherent version of "but I love you" and other things you couldn't catch on.
You shush him and it takes him a while to quiet. You place a hand on his cheek. "I don't want to say my vows in front of people who are wishing on our downfall. You know what Jimmy said to me tonight?"
His eyes go from saddened to worry and then a building. "I knew it. I shouldn't have - what did he say to you?!"
You place a finger on his lip, quieting him again. "Grant, baby, please. We'll deal with him later. I want to go to the courthouse and marry you. I want to say the vows I wrote for you there. And then after, I want to eat a burger or something...something greasy and salty as hell, and then after that I..." You move your finger from his lips down to his chest and then even lower.
"You want to...?" He's playing coy.
You move his finger away from his pants and slap his chest, which makes him release an "oof". "I want Jimmy and your mom to suck it and let us have our moment," you say. You watch his face as he starts to think (he has this cute thinking face that you can't help but melt for).
"Ok. Deal." Curly kisses the corner of your lip. "Can you come inside now? Everyone's worried." You kiss his cheek now and chuckle an 'ok'.
Back at the party, everything felt fine. You had your friends and family to cheer you on and your amazing fiancĂŠ who loved you more than life. It was toward the end of the night you felt a shift.
You were catching up with another friend when you observed Curly walking Jimmy outside. After a few moments, it was just Curly that returned.
"They want you to do what for how long?"
"It's just a year, baby." He was still with this Pony Express bullshit. "It's nothing we haven't done before. Think of the other times as practice.â
He was doing space deliveries in a span of a few days or even hours to the International Space Station....when he could be working up there.
A part of you felt bad for complaining but the money with good. With your income combined, you were able to buy your first home. You had the most spacious dining room and connected kitchen. It helped with family gatherings, dinners with friends, and hard conversations like these.
"Why can't you get like...I don't know...a real job at like NASA?"
He slams his hand on the table. "It is a real job like NASA!"
You're startled - you can't think of one time he has ever raised his voice at you. Your utensils clutter against the plate and you get up, pushing the chair back with your legs. âY/N, babe, sorry-â he tries.
You ignore him and leave the dining room, your shared bedroom being your target. Curlyâs pleadings and footsteps can be heard behind you.
You reach your bedroom and Curly places a hand on your shoulder. It stops you from walking away from him again. He counters you and now both hands are holding your shoulders. âI didnât mean to yell at you. I know I never yell at you.â His right hand moves from your shoulder to your cheek. âIâm really really sorry. I shouldnât have taken my frustrations out on you.â
You blink and your face scrunches up trying to stop yourself from crying, which you fail. Curly brings you in and holds you.
âGrant, I canât do it. I canât do a year,â you sob, âAnd with all the negative testsâŚI canât do it. I need you here with me.â
The both of you were trying for a baby but havenât been lucky. Just a lot of noâs and one false positive - that was the one that hurt the most. The excitement was immediately gone when your doctor told you there wasnât anything to begin with.
So it was back to Square one and other options.
But this year's mission had thrown a wrench in your plans.
Curly leads you over to the bed and has you sit down. He kneels in front of you and takes your hand. âListen, itâs some quick cash. A lot of money. When I get back, Iâll quit. Iâll find something else. And we can focus on ourselves and our family. Iâll make it happen. Itâs a promise.â
Thereâs so much hope in his eyes. He sticks out his pinky finger, indicating that he is serious in his own lighthearted way. You hug him instead.
"So who's the lucky girl?"
Curly looks up and sees Swansea, who's pointing at the gold ring on his left hand.
"Oh!" He turns red at the thought of you. "My wife is back home. I didn't realize how hard it would be - being this far from her. We actually dated long distance for the longest time but yet, I can't shake the unusual feeling in me."
âYour wifeâŚâ The older man thinks for a moment. âOh! The one that pulled you to the side to give you an earful!â He lets out this belly laugh and it goes on for quite a long time. Curly takes a deep sigh, letting his shoulders drop. Swansea slaps his left shoulder, perking him up again. âYeah, I miss that too.â
Curly was about a month into this delivery trip. He stopped counting the days because it made him miss you more. He just wanted to blink and be home so that he could hold you in his arms and apologize a hundred times over.
You both got into an argument when you found out that Jimmy once again found a way to be in Curlyâs space.
One night, Curly got back-to-back calls that he kept ignoring. âJust pick up please so we can sleep,â you tiredly snapped. He chuckled at your annoyance and kissed your forehead before complying.
You didnât find out until you saw Curly off at work before the start of the mission.
âAre you kidding me? Donât tell me he was the one calling!â You exclaimed. Curly looks back at his crew who are feet away saying bye to their own families or prepping the ship. âCan you please-â
âNo! No, no, no, no,â you hold a finger in front of his face. âWhy is he there? I tell you all the time - I donât like him and I donât like the influence he had, or I guess has in this case, on you-â
âHe needed a job! He needed some help. Things arenât good on his end. Heâs a damn good pilot. He justâŚhe just needs the right push.â His blue eyes hold so much sympathy. You loved your husbandâs compassion for others but when it came to Jimmy - after all the times he made it clear you werenât welcomed - you just wished Curly had a little bit of backbone.
Thereâs still so much anger and disappointment in you but you canât help someone who doesnât want to be helped.
âI hope it all works out and that your boy succeeds. Good luck, Captain.â
You raise both hands in defeat and start to walk away from Curly. This is your last image of him before you fully turn around. He says your name once but doesnât follow you.
#mouthwashing#captain curly#curly mouthwashing#curly x reader#mouthwashing x reader#captain curly x reader#black reader#black yn#curly x reader mouthwashing
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The bass from the club pounds through the thin walls, rattling the window above my bed. I should be asleepâIâve got class in the morning and an unfinished assignment mocking me from my desk. Instead, Iâm staring at my phone, the group chat lighting up with plans I wasnât invited to. Again.
It doesnât matter, I tell myself. I wouldnât have gone anyway.
I roll onto my back, staring at the ceiling when my phone buzzes. A text.
Niccolò:
âWhat are you doing?â
I frown, rereading it twice. Weâre not exactly friends. Weâve been in the same circles for years, crossing paths at parties or school events. Niccolò always has this air of confidence, like he owns the world and knows he can do whatever he wants. Heâs infuriating, really. The type of guy who gets away with everything because heâs too charming not to.
I should ignore him. But I donât.
Me:
âNothing. Why?â
A few seconds later, my phone buzzes again.
Niccolò:
âCome out.â
I sit up, confused. Is he joking? Itâs nearly midnight, and the last thing I need is to deal with his arrogance right now.
Me:
âNo.â
It takes him less than a minute to reply.
Niccolò:
âDonât be boring. Iâm outside.â
I freeze. No way. He canât actually be serious, right? But curiosity gets the better of me, and I crawl out of bed, pulling aside the curtain just enough to peek out.
There he is, leaning casually against his car, looking like he stepped out of a magazine. Heâs wearing a black leather jacket over a white t-shirt, his hair just the right kind of messy. Typical Niccolò. He sees me looking and flashes that signature smirk, raising his eyebrows like, What are you waiting for?
I grab a hoodie and head downstairs before I can talk myself out of it.
When I step outside, the cool night air hits me, and Niccolòâs grin widens.
âThought youâd never come,â he says, his voice low and teasing.
âI didnât say yes,â I shoot back, crossing my arms.
He shrugs, unfazed. âYouâre here, arenât you?â
âWhat do you want?â
He doesnât answer right away. Instead, he nods toward the passenger seat of his car. âGet in.â
I hesitate. âWhy?â
âDo you ever stop asking questions?â he says with a dramatic sigh, running a hand through his hair. âJust trust me. Iâm bored, youâre boredâletâs do something about it.â
I know I should say no. Niccolò is trouble, the kind of trouble you see coming a mile away but canât seem to avoid. But thereâs something in the way he looks at me, a mix of mischief and curiosity, like heâs daring me to step into his world.
Against my better judgment, I get in the car.
We end up driving out of the city, the lights of Rome fading in the rearview mirror. Niccolò doesnât tell me where weâre going, and I donât ask. The windows are down, the wind whipping through my hair as he weaves effortlessly through the narrow roads.
âDo you always kidnap people in the middle of the night?â I ask, trying to sound annoyed.
He laughs, a rich, unbothered sound. âOnly the interesting ones.â
I roll my eyes, but he catches the hint of a smile Iâm trying to hide.
Eventually, we pull up to an overlook, the city stretching out below us like a sea of golden lights. Itâs breathtaking, and for a moment, I forget why I was so annoyed with him in the first place.
âNot bad, huh?â he says, leaning against the hood of the car.
I join him, keeping a careful distance. âSo, whatâs the deal? You just wanted to show me the view?â
He lights a cigarette, taking a slow drag before answering. âNot everything has to be a deal, you know.â
âWith you? It usually is,â I counter.
His lips twitch, amused. âFair enough.â He exhales, the smoke curling into the night air. âMaybe I just wanted to see what youâd say.â
âTo what?â
âTo me.â
I scoff, shaking my head. âYouâre unbelievable.â
âAnd yet, here you are,â he points out, smirking.
I donât have a response for that, so I stay quiet, staring out at the city. For all his arrogance, thereâs something almost peaceful about being here with him.
âWhy me?â I ask after a while, my voice softer.
He glances at me, his expression unreadable. âWhy not?â
âThatâs not an answer.â
âMaybe I donât have one,â he admits, surprising me. âMaybe I just think youâre different.â
âDifferent how?â
He flicks his cigarette into the gravel, his eyes meeting mine. For once, thereâs no smirk, no teasing. Just honesty.
âYou donât try to impress anyone. Itâs annoying as hell, but⌠I like it.â
I donât know what to say to that. Niccolò isnât the type to hand out compliments, let alone ones that feel genuine.
âWell,â I say finally, trying to lighten the mood. âYouâre still annoying.â
His smirk returns. âGood. Iâd hate to lose my charm.â
We sit there for a while, the silence stretching between us in a way that feels comfortable, not awkward. For the first time in a long time, I donât feel the weight of everything pressing down on me.
Maybe Niccolò is trouble, but for now, I donât mind getting lost in it.
#niccolo govender#lorenzo zurzolo#theo nott#theodore nott x you#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott#theodore nott fluff#baby netflix
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Marius shrugged, trying as much as he can to seem normal. The fact that he wasnât yelling at Von Raum at the moment or attacking him because heâd fucking said not to talk to him? Might have been considered a good sign, on the one hand.
On the other, Marius knew it was just because he felt so cold, and tired, and ready to stop. What would fighting his counterpart even do right now?
âMy Lyfâs not immortal,â he said quietly. âThe one time they came backâ bargain with a god. Not your YogâSothoth. Not going to say itâs full name, just in case. Teppy.â
Fuck, Lyf would have probably explained this whole story better. Theyâd have glanced over at him, laughed a little, and gone thatâs not it at all, didnât I tell youâ
Lyf wasnât here.
âTeppy keeps its deals, but does so in the most annoying way possible,â Marius said, closing his eyes. Maybeâ maybe Lyf had made another deal, no matter how bad the conditions would be. âSo, Lyf wanting to live? Fine. They were stuck in a nightmare labyrinth for three months, could only sometimes remember anyone in the process, and the idea was they had to find their own way out.â
Huh, oddly quiet here, wasnât it?
âWas actual nightmares, though, so. . . got to see them in my dreams, a few times,â Marius said. âThey remembered me, sometimes. Remembered liking me, remembered hating me. . . Stabbed me once, too, which. . .â
He decided not to finish that sentence. The mechanisms back home typically didnât enjoy hearing how hot he found it when Lyf stabbed people (including him). These ones probably wouldnât enjoy either that or him breaking down crying because he just wanted them to stab him again.
âJust hope theyâre not in there again,â Marius said finally. âGetting them out was a whole different. . . I donât think I could take the train experience again. But I would, if that meant they were okay in the end.â
https://www.tumblr.com/doctorbarontsct/765335072373178368/when-marius-sees-the-flash-of-rainbow-hair-out-of?source=share
"Someone took away your Jonny's harmonics privileges. They can't figure out where I keep finding mine, so they can't take away mine," Jonny said as he played on.
"Jonny," Brian said finally. "Cut the shit before I tell Raphaella to take your brain out and put you in a jar until it grows back. Again. Marius is very obviously not well, and you're picking a fight with him. Please, love." He sighed, looking over Marius once again. "Okay. So, it's been a few weeks since you could last move your arm. This slug is likely what's preventing you from being able to move it, and we don't want to do anything until we have somewhere to safely put it."
Tim hummed. "Jar could work. I'm just saying we should think about putting in the jar."
"You just want to give it to Raphaella so she stops pouting her science projects dying," Jonny grumbled.
Tim just smiled. "Is that so wrong?"
[ @allthesemechanismsbutnocoping ]
"That's about it, I think?" Marius said. He willfully doesn't think about the amount of food he's had over the last few weeks. Or sleep. Or the toe thing, or the mines, or the fact that his other arm is still not working, or the number of things he didn't even mention on Tumblr because he thought this universe's Lyf would have a heart attack.
It's not like that lightning strike did any permanent damage anyway.
"But yeah, somewhere to put it safely, and we're sure taking it out won't make things worse," he added, because that seemed like a very important point he'd made, and he didn't want anyone forgetting that one.
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(Spoilers) Just a Reminder to Curly Sympathizers
Jimmy and Curly are not "Problematic Favs". They're literally thematic vessels for THE problem.
CW: Mentions of SA, and Abuse
Curly (And Pony Express as a Company) Never Cared to give Anya Pysche Evals. Curly only started to care for that when it doubled as an occupational hazard to him and his image.
Curly actively vouches for Jimmy as a crew member despite his "struggle" on earth. I don't see how it'd be far-fetched to assume that involves some form of Misconduct with the fact Curly literally says
"You've gotten through difficult situations before" RIGHT AFTER talking to Anya the actual Victim.
Curly doesn't understand why Anya was talking about the locks on the sleeping quarters and moves past it to reinforce the company's logic. [The Company and Curly can not be bothered to consider or provide actual safety for women. It is an afterthought that resembles a cruel apathy towards women's perspectives in a corporate work environment.]
Would Curly have given the gun to Anya if she asked? Probably not. While that is somewhat debatable It rings to the shitty isolated environment where Anya would have to take up such a mindset. Not to mention Curly is clearly super pals with Jimmy, so if that was a concern he'd probably take Jimmy's (and the rest of the guys) side considering he later took jimmy's side under the fact he sexually assaulted a woman.
The first thing Curly says to Jimmy after trying to consolidate Anya is "I Can Fix This". Curly enables Jimmy to find ways to get out of taking responsibility for the harm he did to Anya.
Curly buckles to the fact his mind is more focused on his position and reputation as a Captain rather than the personal impact Jimmy's harm has caused Anya. This issue is an occupational obstacle to him first and foremost.
Jimmy: "This can be remembered as a tragedy".
Jimmy: "The Tuplar crew was never found."
Jimmy: "You're standing at the top. Feet in cement. Right?"
Curly: "...Right."
And his complacency and dissonance of that truth leads him to do absolutely nothing.
I have seen so much art, and discourse treating him like he wasn't an active enabler. You know what. Fuck it. Half of this is going to double as an Anya Post. thinking about how people disgustingly twist her character to redeem two shitty men who are completely at fault irks me so much.
Anya
The fact that Anya doesn't really get to build herself as a character outside of the scenes that reinforce her tragedy, and antagonist environment feels super sucky.
The purpose of such a narrative direction is of course meant to feed into Jimmy's resentful apathetic attitude towards her, and emphasize the cold unfeeling corporate entity that hired her to be on the tulpar, but as a narrative choice, it still feels rather cruel to take in. Jimmy literally erases her personhood from his mind and only internalizes her presence as a threatening womb while taking the rest of the games runtime to focus on himself and the other men on board.
I see many renditions of Anya in fanart. Adding to her character in ways people weren't really given the time to appreciate or take in during the actual game due to how little she's left with.
I find her canon resolution both annoying and interesting due to this type of interaction where the fans are being pushed towards an interpretive play pen where they are motivated to give Anya more characteristics, quirks, and perspectives than she was allowed to have or emphasize within the game.
Using such field of creative deliberation to redeem the men that actively harmed her is such a gross way to use that play pen.
To get into some interpretations
A pretty important moment occurs after Anya runs out of the medical room during the painkiller scene with the thought:
"I have to believe that our worst moments don't make us monsters"
I think there are quite a few different ways to take this line in this moment, but to share my own perspective I believe it most likely stems from these potential factors:
Anya is trying to maintain a metric of empathy and trust to continue to control herself in the current conditions and stresses she's under at this moment. The needs of the crew can not be upheld without this kind of thinking while under the orders of her abuser.
Anya still cares for Curly and is disconnecting the harm he caused from the rest of his humanity as a person who is also suffering.
Anya is reflecting on her own legitimacy while the internalized trauma she went through makes her feel alienated from herself. Accepting the actual piece of shit that is Curly allows her to hold faith in herself as a person through the shared correlation of pain and "mistakes" as she percieves it bonding her with Curly.
While somewhat ambigous I think its important to generally understand these types of potential layers when interacting with the themes and subjects presented by Anya as a character. Ideas which are critical and dissective of Anya as an actual Subject above a simple generalized understanding of her peripherally as a victim.
also Idea 2 doesn't make Curly vindicated. Curly was the only member that Gave Anya some sense of care (As ingenuine as that care was). That dependency is toxic and was unfortuately potentially of mental necessity to Her. To reframe it as a point for Curly to show he was better than what he presented himself to be so deeply annoys me with how uncritical that reframing is when addressing the actual faults and mentality that led him to his bedridden state. With how little Anya is already focused on, it feels like that interpretation and dynamic hands Curly the position of "Subject" while Anya still remains an "Event" to some people.
That kind of thinking not only significantly reeks of a lack of indulgence in actually trying to further interpret the facets presented in Anya's character, position, and mental state, but also dilutes the meaning to be had in analyzing Curly as an enabler. The framing of Curly as an "Enabler in Rehab" or "Tragic Casualty" feels so utterly ignorant, redundant, and enigmatic to my senses when he is so utterly undeserving compared to Anya who barely gets any other elaboration or analysis from the community outside of "awww wasn't that sad" or sensationalization around "The Event".
I WOULD go into Anya's logic leading up to her death, but thats a post and analysis for a different tumblr user to take care of. I honestly just gradually have developed new ways to hate the Mouthwashing fandom, so I really needed this to make mental space for the next few horrible bizarre takes i'll inevitably see about this game.
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Listen the âBruce brought dick in to stop him killing Zuccoâ is fun
You know whatâs more fun
The fact that Dick Grayson is the fundamental opposite of Jokers one bad day
Because he was 9 and insane
Jokers âall it takes is one bad dayâ meet Dick Grayson also terminally insane but in the opposite direction.
(âI had a bad day not a fan, itâs illegal nowâ
âChum murder is already illegalâ
âYeah in the eyes of the law, but who follows that! Iâve decided itâs illegal for people to have bad daysâ
âYou have to follow laws Dick. You have toâ
âSays the man getting shot at by the cops bc he dresses as a giant bat monster and fights crime using ancient martial artsâ
âHnnngâ
âAnyway itâs illegal now, people suffering I have decided and Iâm adorable so what I say goes!â
Bruce pinching bridge of nose âDick you canât save everyone and change every person you meets lifeâ
âHow about! No!â
âDi-â
âGreat talk Bruce! Bye bye now!â)
Like when I say Dick Grayson was the crazy Robin I donât mean he was aggressive or cruel
No I mean this man would not be out of place in Lewis Carolâs Alice in wonderland.
Heâd see all the insane shit in Gotham and go âthat makes perfect senseâ and continue on his merry way
Like heâs the type of kid who when heâs mad at Bruce for sidelining him on a fight against the joker (and making him fight Harley)
Will pull out a chessboard, grab Harley Quinn and go âI win, you get arkhamed you win we fightâ
âKid-â
âI have a gymnastics competition coming up and I wanna show up this douche in my class- you are not breaking my legs before then. Sit down. Play chessâ
âShit kid why didncha say soâ
Why does he wanna fight the Joker who will objectively injure him far more throughly
âWell itâs simple math, I grew up in a circus, I like clowns, he is the biggest disgrace to clownery Iâve ever seen bet he didnât even go to clown college. Doesnât even have any iconic makeup, he just has toxic waste skin?? Like not even eye makeup or a red nose?? If you wanna do thematic crime do it right? Anyway itâs my legal obligation to try at any given moment to reck the embarrassment to all things goofy and funs shit.â
âââââ
Bruce looking for his 9 year old ward who was kidnapped as Robin
Dick hanging upside down on semi sentient vine gesturing wildly at poison Ivy who is nodding empathically
âAnd the water here is not normal!! Like how do you grow plants! I used to have to take care of plants all the time and now if I water them they rot! Like right in front of me!!? And I feel so bad but?? Itâs water?? Please drink it?? Mr plantâ
âOh yeah itâs because of all the toxic ace chemicals in the water, you have to triple filter it. Honestly Robin Iâm disappointed, your plants should be drinking the same water as youâ
â they do tho!â
âYouâŚdrink⌠Gotham tap water? Batman lets you drink Gotham tap water?â
âWell no⌠he always tells me to use the filter but I like the tap water!! Sometimes itâs fun colors and spicyâ
âoh⌠oh that explains so much about you..â
âNo he just came like that.â
âOh HI B I was asking miss Dr.ivy why my plants keep dyingâ
âRobin donât consort with villainsâ
âMiss Dr. Ivy youâre a doctor rightâ
Poison Ivy who is violently amused âPHD not MD but yeah I amâ
âSo youâre smartâ
âYeasssâ
âCool!âŚ. What does consort mean?â
ââââ-
Annoys the riddler by going with the most out of pocket technically true answer
Think âa sparrow with a shotgunâ
âââ-
Makes the Jokers goons laugh, louder than the joker. Even while under threats of death by sufficiently wacky murder plot
âââ-
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Can you please write something about that new Folio pic x fem reader i am obsessed with that picture
This one, right? If not, I'm very sorry, but I'm obsessed with this one and it makes me think happy thoughts, lol!
Photoshoot
18+ below the cut
Tag list: @philomenie @supersquirrel1996 @foliosgirl @angelmarie89 @fadingintothegrey @thisbicc @lma1986 @dominuslunae @shayzillaaaa @mrsnoahsebastian @flowery-mess @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @stardustsirenmelody @romanreigns-supreme @anything-more-than-human @into-the-grey @rumoured-whispers @myownthoughts12 @sister-sebastian @nyxthedestroyerofworlds-deactiv @missduffsblog @bngurngheart @somebodyllelse @xxkittenkissesxx @fadingangelwisp
"Where is Folio? Folio!! Dude, where the hell are you?"
Bryan's voice echoed through the halls of the stadium, ringing out louder than an intercom. It was annoying, and you'd do anything to get him to stop.
"Bryan, please shut up," you hollered back, rolling your eyes, letting your head fall into your hands.
"Well then, find your man. It's like he's vanished into thin air.â
"Yeah, Y/N, find your man."
Noah appeared, mocking Bryan and earning himself a nice slap in the stomach.
"Ooff," Noah cringed.
"Have you seen Folio?" Bryan asked, raising his brows at Noah. "I really need to get the new shots of all of you before the heathens start pouring in."
"Heathens, you mean fans," I chuckled, knowing how much Bryan hated people bombarding into his space when he was trying to work.
"As a matter of fact, I have. He and Nick went to get haircuts."
You knew this already but pretended not to just so you could watch Bryan get all worked up and irritated. He even looked over at you, narrowing his eyes.
"You already knew that, didn't you?"
Trying to hide your grin, you covered your mouth with your palm.
"I don't know what you're talking about," staring out into the gigantic field before you. The stadium could hold almost fifty thousand people, and the show tonight was sold out. When the hell did their small little Warped Tour band get so big?
"Y/N, I swear to god, if you don't tell him to get back here in an hour, you're dead," Bryan threatened you, half grinning.
"Then Matt won't have an assistant," you said sweetly and gave him an innocent look.
"You better not fuck with my assistant, Bryan," Matt barked, carrying a box of cables and handing them off to you.
"Take those down to the front for me?"
"Sure thing, Boss," you smiled, taking the box from him.
Matt rolled his eyes. "Don't call me, boss. Remember, I've seen you naked."
"Oh my god, that was not my fault! You walked in on me showering!"
"I never said it was your fault," Matt laughed, bopping your nose with his finger.
"Kiss ass," Noah said under his breath.
"Fuck you, Noah," you retorted, knowing very well it was all a joke.
"Oh baby, I would love it if you would!"
You rolled your eyes and kept walking.
"In your dreams, Noah," you yelled out.
"Already have," he yelled back.
You just kept walking, too embarrassed to look back.
Walking down the white brick hallway, dragging your fingers along the cool stones as you did, you could hear voices coming from up ahead, followed by loud laughter.
Stopping suddenly, you looked into the faces of the two guys responsible for all the drama earlier and one solid look at Folio, and you were absolutely done for. The way he smiled at you had you melting into a puddled mess.
"I'm gonna," Nicholas said, looking from you to Folio, nodding his head towards the stairs.
"Yeah, alright. We'll be up in a few."
Folio couldn't take his eyes off you and the feeling was mutual. His fresh haircut, neatly shaved on the sides and around the back, parted perfectly on the left side right above his ear so the longer part on top could be swept over and back was doing things for you. He had the right amount of gel in it, too, which gave it the sexy wet look that always drove you crazy.
You were aching to run your fingers through it, to take it between your fingers and yank on its roots, pulling those familiar grunts and groans out of Folio that always made your core moist and ready.
He knew you were thinking things. His sweet little grin proved it.
"We've got time."
You smiled, walking your fingers up your man's chest that was covered by a thin black shirt. The scent of his cologne made you lightheaded and weak at the knees because of how fucking good it smelled.
"Bryan will kill me if I keep you any longer, especially when he sees Nicholas and not you."
Folio stared down at you, laying a soft kiss on your forehead.
"Yeah, but I've got a problem that needs fixing before I can go up there."
You chuckled, letting your fingers wander over Folio's neck, taking in his haircut and everything about him that you loved.
"Oh, you do? Sounds like someone is making excuses."
Folio took one of your hands and drove it down until it hit the very thing he was intending for it to touch.
"I'm so fucking hard for you, baby. I need you to fix me before I can go up there."
You pulled back and looked at him and the one little glint in his eyes was all it took for you to give in.
Folio drank you in, watching as you straddled his thigh. His hands laid loosely on your hips, avoiding the temptation to yank down your pants to feed his hungry appetite.
Your hands found his hair, and instantly his head fell back against the couch, mouth falling open to release a small soft moan as you began sliding your fingers through the soft wet like strands of his hair like you had imagined earlier.
Your fingers raked over his scalp, massaging the top and the sides, making Folio nothing but puddy in your hands.
"Kiss me," he murmured, looking up at you sweetly. You obliged him, grabbing the back of his head and bringing his mouth yours, kissing him as if your life depended on it.
He groaned against your lips and you felt the strangled sound in your clit, making your panties a little wetter.
Trailing your lips down his jaw, the tanned, tender skin of Folio's neck looked too delicious to not taste. Latching your lips to his neck, you sucked his skin, running your tongue and lips over it, making him whimper beneath you. His slight gasp and thrusting of his hips made you smile.
"You still want me to fix you," you whispered, leaning your forehead against his, clinging to his broad shoulders.
Folio swallowed. "Fuck yes, please." He grabbed your ass and pushed your lower body into him, slightly bucking his hips.
"I've been fantasizing about this all week," he confessed, grinning weakly.
You hummed in approval, dragging your hands down his neck and the front of his chest, watching his eyes grow wider with anticipation. It made you giggle as you kissed his pouty lips again. The smile that spread across Nick's own face made your heart race.
Dropping to your knees before him, your fingers trailed along the zipper of his pants. You lifted the bottom of his shirt just enough to slip your fingers beneath it and find the top button of his jeans, undoing it. He lifted up as you tugged his jeans down, revealing his already half hardened covered cock The sight made you weak, making you want him ever more. Removing his jeans fully and dropping them on the floor next to you, you proceeded to remove his boxers, taking a deep breath and biting your bottom lip the moment his cock was fully exposed.
His thickness, the precum covering the swollen pink tip, the ridges and veins you loved to drag your tongue over, all of it was driving you mad, making you desperate for him.
Folio's hands were laying flat on the couch beside him, waiting for you to make your move. You looked up at him as though you were as desperate and needy as he was. Dragging his tongue between his lips, a small smile, almost like a smirk, graced Folioâs lips.
"Well, are you gonna fix me, sweetheart? Hmm? You gonna wrap those pretty pink lips around my cock?"
Folio slipped his hand behind your neck and applied some light pressure, signaling what he wanted you to do. With one hand on his thigh, you softly gripped his swollen shaft, sliding your hand all the way down to the base, then back up, sighing over the feeling of it in your hand. Nick let his head fall against the back of the couch, licking his lips and rolling his head side to side with his eyes shut tight, moaning softly.
"Fuck, baby, you make that feel so good," he smiled, when he opened his eyes to look at you. The little tendrils of hair that fell over his forehead made him so irresistible.
"You like how it feels in your hand, don't you?"
"Mmmhmm, I do," you agreed, sitting up and kissing Folio again, pleased to see the satisfied look on his face.
The warmth of him in your hands was intoxicating. You felt every little throb and twitch each time you squeezed and pulled or went back down. Looking down and watching the small trickles of precum spill from the tiny slit on his pink head hit your clit, sending strong tingling vibrations through your body.
Keeping direct eye contact with him, you lowered your head and took him in your mouth, sliding your tongue down the backside of his shaft before closing your lips around it, moving your head up and down. Folio's head fell back again with the tip of his tongue protruding between his lips as quiet mumbles of "fuck" and "oh my god" fell from his lips. He was in heaven, and you were the one taking him there.
Rolling your tongue around the ridges of his cock, tasting the saltiness of the precum seeping through, you looked up at him with all the love and adoration you felt for him, hoping he could feel the emotions coming from you as you took him fully in, down to the base. Folio jerked, thrusting his hips and forcing his cock deeper into your mouth.
"Oh god, baby, I love you so much," he groaned while gently holding the back of your head. Nick pumped into you, hitting that perfect spot in the back of your throat that made you gag. Saliva trickled down your chin the harder you sucked him, forcing his fingers to tangle in your hair.
"Fuck, yeah just like that baby, oh god," Folio muttered, bucking his hips. "Good girl, take it all baby, deep throat my cock. Show me how much you want it."
His words were music to your eyes. His praises were the light to your soul. There was nothing you wouldn't do for this man under you. He had you entirely forever.
Using your hand, you began to pump his shaft while still sucking and licking, hollowing out your cheeks until they were sore. Nick pushed himself deeper, spreading your slips apart, and guiding every inch of his shaft to the back of your throat.
"Holy fuck, sweetheart, how are you so fucking good at this," Folio laughed, grabbing the back of my hair. He gripped it tightly, directing your movements and moaning loudly, begging you not to stop. You continued bobbing your head up and down, sucking on his cock and massaging his balls, the softness of them feeling so light and perfect in my hand.
"Oh my god, baby, that's it, use your tongue. Make me cum. Fuck, fuck!" he panted.
With every hard thrust, Folio's cock tightened in your mouth. He was so close.
Wrapping your hand around his shaft again, you pumped him tightly, sucking his tip and nipping at the end of it, making him writhe in absolute pleasure.
"Jesus! Fuck, baby I'm about to cum! Take it all, Y/N. Make me cum baby, please!"
Sucking his tender head a few more times did it.
Folio groaned, his hips jerking violently, and his warm cum shot out hitting the back of your throat. You swallowed, drinking everything he poured into you.
"Ughhh, holy fuck, baby," Folio gasped, voice raspy and out of breath. You sat back on your feet wiping your mouth with your shirt, smiling.
"So," you stated, helping him get his pants on and fix himself before climbing onto his lap and latching your hands onto his shoulders. Folio secured you to him with his hands pressed firmly against your ass.
"So," he repeated, accepting the kiss you laid on his lips.
"Still broken?"
His laughter vibrated onto you.
"If broken means I get to have that every time just so you'll fix me, then baby, I'll stay forever broken for you."
Folio rubbed his nose against yours before placing a small kiss on the end of it.
"Forever broken, huh? Maybe that should become our phrase, like our code word or something," you chuckled, laying into him. That's when you gasped, knowing Bryan was going to kill you for what you did.
"Seriously, Y/N! A hickey! Right in the middle of the side of his neck! Of all the fucking places," Bryan cried.
Noah snickered, covering his mouth with his fist before turning around and looking over at you.
"Busted," he croaked.
You glared at him, holding up the middle finger.
Noah shrugged, giving you that shit eating grin of his. You rolled your eyes, turning away from him.
"Dude, fix your hair," Nicholas barked at Folio, flicking the random pieces of stay hair.
"Get off me, Nick, I got it! I'm not a little kid."
"Yeah, obviously. Y/N made that perfectly clear," Noah teased, earning him another heated, annoyed glare from you.
"I'm sorry, Bryan. It wasn't my fault," you apologized, trying not to laugh.
Bryan's face fell. "Not your fault? Y/N, Folio didn't do that to himself."
"Yeah, I know, but that hair cut, and that face, and the way he smells, I just, I couldn't... ugghh, fuck!" you grumbled in frustration.
Folio looked at you grinning from ear to ear as Alana tried to cover as much of the hickey as she could, finally giving up.
"It'll work for the show, but not for the picture," she chuckled.
"Fine whatever," Bryan frowned, tossing Folio a black ski mask. "Put that over your shoulder, and follow me."
"There," Bryan pointed towards a white sheet hanging up against the wall in front of him. "I was going to have you look at the camera, like the last one we did like this, but now," he groaned, glaring at me, "you'll just have to look sideways. So, look at your girl toy over there, and don't move."
Nicholas and Noah were rolling with laughter as Folio turned sideways for the shot. He looked straight at you, sighing as you smiled at him.
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New Victim
Paring: Wednesday Addams x Reader
Summary: Enid tells you about a new student that arrived to nevermore. You canât help, but tease Wednesday, to get a reaction out of her.
Warning: Profanity
Authors note: Reader kinda likes to tease people, and I havenât watched this show since 2022đ¤
Enid(your bestfriend), and you were currently eating lunch together. You listened to Enid as she spoke about her new, odd, roommate called, Wednesday Addams.
âSo, Y/N! I have this new roomie, and well, sheâs quite interesting if I do say so myself,â Enid chuckled as she took another bite out of her lunch.
âWhat do you mean by âinterestingâ Enid?â You said as you made quotation marks in the air.
Enid sallowed the bite she was chewing on, and looked at you. âI mean, sheâs not ordinary. And there absolutely nothing wrong with that! We all arenât ordinary, but sheâs just different in some type of way.â
You listened intently, âI somewhat understand. No need to explain any further. Also speaking of Wednesday, where is she? Itâs lunch timeâ
âSheâs probably in her dorm! She always eats in there.â
You smirked deviously
âYou know what would be funny?
Enid smirked along with you
âY/N, whatever youâre planning Iâm all in for it.â
Enid was like your partner in crime.
âI should totally go and annoy, Addams!â
Enidâs smile slightly faded. âYou sure thatâs a good idea? Wends, is kinda intimidating,â
You rolled your eyes at your friendâs statement, âHow bad can it be? Your roommate might need some company, donât you think?â
Enid sighed âYeah, Y/N, Iâm not so sure about this.â
âFinee. I guess Iâll just do it by myself. Have fun talking to Yoko, or Ajax, or something,â You said as you got off of her seat and threw away your trash as you headed to, Ophelia Hall.
You already knew where Enidâs dorm was since you been there before, but you never had met this âWednesday Addamsâ before.
You finally arrived in front of the door room. You took a deep breath in, and opened the door.
You were met with a room clearly decorated differently since the last time you been here.
You saw a short girl with braided pigtails, sitting at the black side of the room. You canât really tell what sheâs doing, but she didnât even care to look of who just walked in.
âWhat is it exactly that you want.â
Wow. Enid wasnât kidding. She was intimidating. Her voice sent shivers down your spine, but you talked to people like this. You can handle it!
âAh, you must be the âWednesday Addamsâ everybodyâs talking about. Iâm-â
Wednesday cut you off, âI didnât ask for a whole speech. You are yet to respond to my question.â She said with a cold voice
This bitch. How rude.
âOkay, asshole. To answer your question that you so much wanted, I was only here to be nice, and welcome you. At least Iâm not the one isolating myself.â
Wednesday finally turned to look at you.
âWas your use of profanity really necessary. I also wouldnât call it âisolating.â I prefer to be alone.â
You laughed, âYeah, yeah whatever makes you sleep at night.â
âActually having thoughts of people suffering makes me sleep at night. I find it quite calming,â Wednesday said without any hesitation.
Okay now you fully understand what Enid meant by, ânot ordinary roommate.â
âThanks for oversharing that even though I didnât ask for it.â
Wednesday turned back around to her desk, and there was silence for a few minutes.
The smirk you had before when talking to Enid came back.
âYouâre quite interesting, Addams. Also quite the cute one too.â
Wednesday looked back at you with an confused expression
âWas that your attempt to try, and flirt?â
You giggled as your eyes never left hers, âPerhaps. Is it working?â
She groaned out of annoyance, and got up from her chair as she stood closer to you.
âYou think too low of me. Why is it your mission to go bother me.â
You took a step closer to Wednesday Addams.
âI just find teasing someone like you, entertaining.â
Wednesday would be lying if she said that the proximity of yours faces didnât make her whole entire body turn hot.
She was usually cold
Lunch time ended some time ago so Enid walked into the room. Seeing you and Wednesday standing close to each other.
You with your signature grin and Wednesday having always that icy expression on her face.
âGuys? Is everything alright?â Enid said tilting her head.
You both went ahead and turned your heads to Enid.
You decided to speak first, âYeah I was just heading out. Iâll catch you later, Enid and Wednesdayâ
You looked at Wednesday, and had a grin on your face as you left their dorm to head back to yours.
Wednesday couldnât help but walk back over to the desk and finish whatever she was doing before she got interrupted by you.
But unfortunately, you didnât leave her mind. Why would you even want to tease her like that. Did you not find her scary like other students do?
Feelings are Wednesdayâs worst enemy.
#jenna ortega#wlw#wednesday x reader#wednesday addams#enid sinclair#teasing#flirting#annoying#close proximity#reader insert#jenna ortega x y/n#wednesday netflix#wednesday x you#wednesday x y/n
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Death of me
Cillian Murphy as Thomas Fucking Shelby
"Do you honestly think I could ever forget?"
Hayley Atwell as Katherine Redwine
"Christ...just tell him or I will."
Annabelle Wallis as Grace Burgess
"Is that jealousy I hear?"
Joe Cole as John Shelby
"You'll always be a Shelby never get that."
Paul Anderson as Arthur Shelby
"Don't worry luv, we got you. Who do I gotta kill?"
Sophie Rundle as Ada Shelby
"You've always been there for me, of course I'll be here for you."
Helen McCrory as Polly Grey
"Us women are smarter. Now chin up, we have a job to do."
Chapter One
The air of Small Heath seemed to have a way of sticking to your skin or clothing. It left you feeling almost sticky and sweaty from the grim that would collect no matter how careful you chose to be. The people had grown used to such things and one could never be too precious about their clothing. Children seemed to run wild with their dogs and friends, men in the factories returning home covered in soot and the women trying to keep their homes cleaned to the best of their ability. Katherine Redwine had been brought up on Watery Lane and in her young mind, she believed that this was always going to be the case. âKat, are you listening?â The annoyed voice of Ada rang through her ears pulling her attention away from the window. âYes, of course. You were saying?â Katherine gave her friend a smile and lifted her cup of tea to her lips. It was rare that the two girls got moments like this and she didnât mean to waste her time lost in the clouds. Ada watched Katherine with a sad smile of her own. Since the war Katherine hadnât been the same, which she supposed was the common saying amongst the rest of the world. âI was saying that I think it is time that we get you back out there. You are a beautiful girl and I know anyone would be lucky to have you.â Ada leaned forward in her chair and crossed her ankles. âHe wouldnât want you to live like this. Pat-â âIâm alright I promise, I am just not ready. Thereâs still too much to do right now.â It wasnât a complete lie. Since the men had come back home it had been a hard adjustment for her. First her brother had been killed and the man she had loved for most of her life had simply turned his back and had barely spoken a full sentence to her. And now that same man seemed to have found more trouble as if he had been fishing for it. Katherine shook her head placing the cup down back on the table giving the young Shelby womanâs hand a small squeeze. âBut in the meantime I look forward to hearing all about how sweet and kind Freddie is.â At the mention of Freddie Thorne, Ada's cheeks began to flush, the usual reaction when the man was pulled into the conversation or whenever Ada told her friend of the latest escapades the two had gotten into. Katherine watched as Ada continued to talk about how much she loved Freddie and the latest times they had to meet up in secret, the forbidden romance felt like a dream she had had once. She had been so young when she first met him but those blue eyes of Thomas Shelby would forever haunt her. She was sure she would die with the image of his eyes, his smile permanently imprinted into her thoughts. She had been so angry with him, the sting of her slap across his face still stung her hand when she thought about it for too long. Of course when she had heard of what he found she wanted to try to knock some sense into him.Â
And now she had a sinking feeling in her gut that felt like it was growing larger and larger each time she tried to swallow. Leave it to the most clever man she knew to bring down the eye of the government, the IRA, and god knows who else by finding and taking those guns.Â
Thomas fucking Shelby.Â
Those words rang in her mind when her man had told her, they rang when she confronted Charlie Strong and Curly. And once she had left Ada making her way down the street and heard of his stunt with the Chinese in a show to gather more bets. Any time she had tried to tell Thomas that he was getting into things he had no business doing, he would tell her that it âwasnât womenâs businessâ and would drop it at that, leaving Katherine to stare at him in a mix of frustration and continued heartache.Â
Katherine began to make her way to the Garrison pub for her usual one drink with Harry giving a small nod and smile to the people she passed and in return would gain her own âMrs. Shelbyâ greeting. She had grown numb to the nickname and had given up on correcting those that continued to use it and she decided to see it as a type of shield. No one fucked with the Peaky Blinders and the Shelby name went a long way in Small Heath. If Thomas had taught her anything it was to appear as calm and unbothered as possible when inside you just want to shoot something, or rather someone.
âWelcome in my lady, your usual?â Harry said, placing a glass down on the bar once Katherine had entered. She made her way to the middle of the bar and took her usual seat. âYes please, Harry.â Katherine gave the older man a kind smile and glanced about the pub. The usual bar flies were about four glasses in and only acknowledged her with a simple nod or not at all. âHow have you been Harry? Havenât been given any trouble have you?â
âNone, miss. Mostly the occasional drunkard fight but it ends well enough.â Harry placed the Irish whiskey down for the Redwine and leaned on the bar top. âYou look as if you need a good drink and a good sleep.â Katherine huffed a laughed at her friendâs words and shrugged taking a sip from the amber liquid. âDonât I always look this way?â She teased tilting her head. She had always enjoyed Harryâs company; he was kind in his own way and cared for the Garrison like it should have been. This was home and he had taken care of her when she had gotten so drunk she hadnât been able to stand and he made sure that she would never reach that low again. He had made Katherine promise to not lose herself in her grief or heartbreak. He had been the father figure that she needed after Patrick had been killed.Â
âKat, donât bullshit me.â Harry shook his head. Katherine spun her glass slightly, his gentle but stern tone was comforting in a sense. It was the same tone he had when he found her in the private room that Thomas always used. She had broken down and cried in Harryâs arms and was more whiskey than person and she was sure her breath could have caused an explosion if she lit a match. Earlier that day they had held a service for Patrick and it had really hit her that he was gone, her big brother, her protector was nowhere to be found. Just like her Tommy, sweet happy Tommy who was able to light up a room with his smile and whose laugh was contagious seemed to have died the same night. Harry had listened as she cried and mourned the lives lost and dreams that were crushed but once she was done he picked her up and helped her upstairs and cleaned her up and put her to bed. He had banned anyone giving her any kind of alcohol in the Garrison until she was able to function. He would be damned if the sweet girl turned into one of the men he served. âIâm fine Harry, I promise.â Katherine was touched as he watched her but before he could comment the doors to the Garrison were pushed open as the one man who she couldnât stand walked through in the most attention way he could have.Â
Fucking Thomas.Â
(It will get better I promise but let me know what you think!)
#peaky blinders#thomas shelby#john shelby#peaky blinder fanfic#peaky fookin blinders#cillian murphy#tommy shelby smut#polly gray#michael gray#arthur shelby#peaky blinders oc
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saw your oc and not surprised that itâs a child. no wonder aoex fandom has so much pedos in it that have child characters. go and delete yourself
okay normally I donât answer on those hate messages but this one is personal so I try my best to explain what happened to me somehow idk my English is not the best and Iâm not used to talk about personal stuff online.
đź
Hi! My name is Pax and Iâm receiving hate messages since I started posting art of my favorite character from Blue Exorcist.
At first it was only on twitter. I started posting around a year ago and then people sent me messages like how they hate Arthur. I wasnât used to be part of a fandom so I thought it was kinda normal. I just blocked the people and yes it became calmer after that. Then it started on tumblr too. I love to get questions where I can draw something in return but I also got anon questions that are just rude or weird. Luckily you can block anons too but somehow they always come back to me after a small amount of time and tbh idk what I do wrong.
I am ignoring, deleting and blocking those all the time. Donât get me wrong I really donât care much but saying stuff like Iâm a pedo is WRONG just because I have a child OC. Iâve never drawn him in any romantic way and Iâll never do. I donât even think about that. Why should I? OCs are often like own children and my oc Kingo is like my own son. He was originally created for a roleplay where Arthur decided to adopt him after a lot of things happened to him. They are only father and son and they love each other because Arthur is trying to be a really good dad like he always trying to do his best with no matter what he do. The point is Kingo became my OC after I got the diagnosis that Iâd never be able to get own children after trying it for 4 years. It was my dream even if a lot of people couldnât imagine how important it can be for a woman who really wants this. I build a house where everything should be safe for my future child. Getting this result of all my tests and my health conditions was a shock Iâll never get fully over it even if I pretend. My relationship broke after 8 years and I never felt so useless.
This is the reason why I created my OC Kingo. Not because I am a pedo or something wtf. It was because I found consolation in having a fictional son and that he has a family that cares about him. Thats why Kingo will always be a very special OC and I get very emotional when it comes to him.
I know I donât need to explain myself and who the fuck is gonna read that text hmm but yes. Stop hating me I just wanna do art. Nothing more. Youâre annoying go out and do something nice instead of hating each other â¨
#Please stop spreading hate#Our fandom is so small we need to stay together#blue exorcist#aoex#ao no exorcist#arthur auguste angel
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An Angel?
(Elora backstory!)
(Peeps?: @city-of-c0rpses @myluckymoon )
Mom and dad were always such fantastic parents. They loved and cared for me endlessly. Spoiled me but made sure I was humbled and grateful as well. True role models for me. They inspired me to be loving and treat others with kindness as well. Though I was always loving by nature. I wanted to love people no matter who or what they are.
Though when I was little, I had no one to love and spoil on. So when my parents asked me what I wanted for Christmas when I was 6, I gave an excited reply, "I want a sibling!" I remember that moment when their faces scrunched up in worry, but I never knew why in the moment.
Apparently, my mom had struggles with trying to get pregnant, and having me was dangerous enough due to the birthing process. For medical reasons, she could have almost died for having me. I don't blame them for deciding not to have another kid and telling me no. But for a long time I was still wishing for a sibling.
At first, I wanted any sibling until I decided and settled that I specifically wanted a baby brother. Whenever I would go to the park, I would watch families play together. There would be sisters playing tag with their brothers, older brothers simply walking and having a conversation with their siblings. Seeing the people at the park made me desire to have a baby brother.
I figured that my day of having a sibling will never come though. I sorta accepted it when my mom told me why I can't have a sibling.
Until one day, when I was 11 ,I got a call from my best friend at the time, Xena Withlock. She was my age and had three younger sisters and came from a wealthy family. She called me to inform me that she won't be at school the next day. "Why not? We have a test tomorrow?" I asked over the phone.
"Because my mom is in the hospital right now. I'm going to have a brother tonight." Xena replied to me. I practically dropped the phone and hung up, running over to her house as quickly as I could. How come she never told me about this until now?! Why am I just hearing about this now?!
I had one single goal in mind. I always wanted a baby brother, yet never could have had one. My only way to ever get one was to become the godsister of my closet friend's brother. I was determined to get what this family didn't want in the future.
I felt a little bad for bursting into Xena's home and room unexpectedly and not invited, let alone stay the night there as well, but my desire to meet this baby was there. Besides, we had a fun little sleep over that night. The next day, we went to the hospital. I was skipping ahead of Xena and her three younger sisters, Lillie, Viola, and Sophia. I was too excited, all I could do was leap in excitement. Poor Xena was so confused why.
I guess you can say I annoyed the crap out of her father and mother. Because as soon as we arrived to the room, I practically begged her father to allow me to be their new son's godsister. Her poor mom, who was still recovering at the time was so tired that she gave me the "Whatever, sure."
I couldn't have been happier once I was granted permission. Immediately, I called dibs on holding the baby first. Giving into my demands, they let me, handing over the tiny baby in my arms. They named his Xavier. He was the cutest little baby, sleeping peacefully all swaddled up. Absolutely adorable.
I held him close to my chest, enjoying the closeness. I promised to myself that I would help take good care of him. I think I did a good job in fulfilling that promise. For almost every day of my life, until I moved when I was a adult, I would visit the Withlocks and take care of my baby brother.
From simply holding him and talking to him, to watching him grow, I would try to be there. Xena would make jokes that I was the 5th sister of the family, since I was there all the time. How could I not be there? That's my baby brother right there.
From trying to lift his head the first time, crawling on the floor, showing me crayon colored dinosaurs, pushing him on the swings, and before saying goodbye for the last time, I tried to be there for him. For every little thing he did, I was proud of him. I loved him. Every moment I wanted to spoil him rotten and love on him.
His parents weren't always the greatest. I could tell from day one when I met Xena. But I was hoping that, at least through all my efforts, I left a little bit of impact and hope in him for when I had to take my leave. After all life was telling me to start growing up. Soon before I knew it, I had a husband, I was living out in the countryside, I had my own kids to take care of, life got the best of me.
Oh, but how time flies. It's been a while, a few years since I reached out in contact. I hope they are doing well.
After all, I still love them.
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#hi im j here 2 talk . saw this cow yday so i drew her and now u get 2 say hi#but omffgg my gd i dont know if any of u relate but i feel like my ability to socialize w others#specifically online and speciifically in interest-circles has gotten so much harder for no reason whatsoever#like im just becoming more self conscious ab how i portray myself and its so weird bc like . LIKEE I DONT KNOW like . ok#people r super njce . always super nice and reach out to me and talk w me or i reach out first and they respond and r soo sweet#and something happens in my brain where like . i feel like im suddenly like . inserting myself where i dont belong (not true) but why am i#the bus driver all of a sudden . in all of these situations . me when i just show up like hey#i think i j feel annoying >__< . and i dont want to bother other people but said people r literally never bothered ykwim like Will Reach Out#and im the one that pulls back but 4 no reason . i cant even think ab why i do that .why am i doing this đ§¨#so many ppl i want to genuinely befriend in all of these spaces but im self sabotaging soo frwaking bad#literally rn thinking of some dms i left on read bc i panicked or mutuals ive talked w before who im nervous 2 be familiar w . hrmm#anyways . i kind of wish i had the ability 2 just talk to new people and not actually gaf ab the outcome#HELPP .. early tmblr or wcf or devart where u have thirty million friends 2 now where u r too scared 2 say hi to an almost friend .#me problem though . if not alr clear HEJAHHAAHA i think part of my reluctance also stems from the fact that i know i get this way#and so i dont want 2 rope someone else into that insecurity so i try to keep it at an arms length until i fix it#but i think i also know its a longer & more introspective thing to work on so i do need to just try anyways
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hey y'all ive decided i do not want random people sexting me, i dont mind something in my asks because i can do whatever i want with those plus its fun, but i do not feel like engaging sexually one on one with people i barely know and end up trying to engage with me in that way when I'm super not in the mood lol
so starting now im not accepting people trying to tell me whatever they wanna do to me because honestly? i dont care
#sexting is for friends/mutuals and most importantly my girlfriend#if we're not mutuals I'd rather you stopped that#jojo barks#idk my libido is pretty low and im usually not in the mood (depression lol)#so it gets annoying having people try to talk this way to me when i don't want it.
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I do think a good chunk of the 'cringey atheist' stereotype did come from the fact that, especially americans, regardless of their actual religious status are just casually christian and refer to things through a religious filter and that isn't seen for how overwhelming/obnoxious/frustrating it is. Its absense, such as when writing a story and things like "oh god" or other casual references are remove or replaced, is seen as notable the same way people find the cast being all women or queer being 'abnormal'.
And I think more people, especially here on tumblr, should take a moment from ragging on some kid being "cringey" saying god doesn't exist or making atheist jump around like dancing monkeys to establish they're one of the good respectful ones before they ever even begin to talk about their own thoughts, and examine why so much content just inserts god into a conversation that had nothing to do with religion like it's the expected norm, the same way they examine the invasiveness of casual heteronormativity.
#this is just cause an ex christian youtuber i otherwise like refers to any extreme emotional experience as a 'religious experience'#as if everyone can agree on it being so#and theres more than a few posts on here that make me wonder why#so many people are incapable of making something 'poetic' or 'great' without invoking religious imagery#even where it had no relevance#atheism#anyways#ive seen uncomfortably similar treatment that aces in particular have received for pointing out amatonormativity in a post#its rare these days though because atheists have long since been thuroughly shamed in american society as being edgy#which like wooow a christian nation that shames every other religion in some way found a way to shame nonreligious too? shocking#actually i get kinda annoyed when i think about it its one of those propaganda that people casually buy into#without examining it at all#youll see atheists acting like dancing monkeys trying to establish theyre not cringe guys its okay#just to talk about how they feel and think#i remember being a young adult and when someone started talking to me with the assumption of god being in the picture#and id get an eye roll like i was being childish not going along with it nevermind they inserted god into the convo in the first place#without question or comment#and i know it wasnt forceful the same way some ex religious folks can get a bit zealous the same way they were about religion#which theres something to eb said for that zealousness being acceptable when christian but not when atheist or another religion#but ive never gone through such a phase my family has been atheist for several generations now and we were taught to respect beliefs#anyways sorry idk why this is on my brain this afternoon i think i saw a post or smth and it reminded me of that youtuber
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i know this has been said 473773474833 times by the kavetham/haikaveh shippers and probably even nonshippers, but i'll say it again. I finally finished the genshin summer event and did the little after quest in sumeru and.....every time kaveh is sneaking around trying not to be noticed coming out of alhaithams house it's just such a gay vibe. he's basically screaming "I can't be caught being gay in a homophobic society!" even if that's not what the game writers are *actually* saying. that's just how it comes off and they can't make it come off any other way. with hoyo's gay history, it makes me wonder if it's on purpose and all a cover-up to have a technically different reason for it so they can get away with it lmao but we will never know.
#lee text#genshins#i can acknowledge how gay they are without liking thr ship#flashback to several kavetham/haikaveh (whatevwr their ship name is) shippers on here attacking me over not liking the ship#trying to âeducateâ me on why theyre sk gay and why i should ship it#look i didnt say they arent gay af. and these shippers dismissed my feelings completely#i think it was after that one event with the competition thing that kaveh won? idk but just they way they interacted#the way alhaitham talked to kaveh and the way kaveh responded TRIGGERED A TRAUMA RESPONSE IN ME#which made me dislike the ship and their dynamic! i didnt CARE if he was well meaning. the way he talked to kaveh#triggered a fight or flight response in me because it sounded similar to how ive been talked to and kaveh getting upset was similar to#how ive reacted to the same words. you can also argue my family cares about me like alhaitham does kaveh and its how he helps#but it doesnt mean its the kind of help we need and it doenst traumatize us lmao#so i dont get why people were so angry at me for getting triggered by this ship and disliking it for that reason#while i can still admit that they are gay af and seem to get a long a bit better after that and i can tolerate them now#since its been a while and i dont remember it enough to have a trauma response when seeing them anymore lmao#but its just annoying that shippers can be so toxic đ they care more about their fictional men ship than me. a real person. weird#not tagging the ship so i dont get more angry shippers in my notes....but they found me last time with no tags so hi. dont yell at me again!#but maybe no one will care since im putting my âanti ship propagandaâ in the tags this time and not the main post lmao#just dont read my tags so you dont get mad at me for being uncomfortable by this ship dynamic. but if youre reading this...its too late#leave me alone they arent real and i am so im more important right đ
#let me shame the shippers that dismissed my real feelings because they think their ship is more important than a real person lmao#you cant tell me im wrong when a trauma response isnt a choice and happens against your will đ#BE ASHAMED YOU NERDS#I WILL BITE YOUR KNEECAPS#sorry i just had to vent lmao
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the moment people stop being comically against courtney is the day i stop making fun of them for being weird and wrong. stop being weird about a fictional character in ways that are hilariously stupid and ill stop calling you hilariously stupid
#people see my posts and vauge post about it saying UM WELL I DONT HATE COURTNEY SO WHY DID YOU SAY THAT#im not fucking talking about you oh my gOD IM SO TIRED OF SEEING IT. sorry i try to be normal but why have discussions around her regressed#like its gotten so much worse WHYYY OH MY GODDD. âomfg courtney fans always jump to courtney haters being misogynistsâ#no i jump to you being a fucking weirdo for caring so much which makes me raise my eyebrows#i literally enjoy other people having different opinions about characters i like and dislike bc everyone echoing me would be so boring#but people never like her for the valid reasons there are to dislike her and jump on her in crazy fucking ways. BEEE NORMALLL BE FUCKING N#ps talks#jesus fuck i try not to say shit like this over and over and over again because; again; i dont like seeing my own opinions everywhere#i dont want people to see my opinions and repeat it every 5 seconds even though i dont think i have that much influence#its just when i see people posting about my posts saying that im weird for defending a character so hard it drives me nuts bc#it feels like people lost the damn plot so hard. you have to reach so far to think i fucking care if people dislike courtney BECAUSE I DONT#IVE SAOID THIS 5 BILLION TIMES I ENJOY SEEING CHARACTERS IN DIFFERENT LIGHT. AS LONG AS YOUR OPINION ISNT FUCKING WEIRD#sorry im getting so annoyed i need to go to sleep i havent eaten anything in like 20 hours
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