#so imma try do be productive today

[wish-i-were-heather]

ok wait i might have woken up at 12 but imma try to make today productive 😣😣

[katyobsesses]

I think my Good Week of this month has come and gone 🥺 😔

[mellosdrawings]

*waves and beams exhaustedly but no less genuine* hi! Just wanted to take a moment and let you know that you're art makes me very happy. I do sincerely hope it makes you happy as well and just know you are doing outstanding work.

(I'm kinda feral over how you draw both Azul and Jamil. They are so cute and handsome as well as Jamil's pretty hair.)

I was curious, I saw some people requesting stuff but didn't really see you saying you are taking any, but if you are and don't mind, I would really, really, really love to see Silver x Leona with Silver sleeping sitting up and Leona with his head in his lap (or as an alternative, them both sleeping prone <bed, ground, whatever, the surface is not important> and Leona <the important part> is absolutely using Silver as a body pillow. Just as long as this is a request you'd feel like doing. Don't feel obligated. :D

Finally, because I saw some of your art today and I've been having a bad day—your art made me feel quite a bit better in general, so i wanted to thank you for sharing your gorgeous art with us. Sending you epic vibes and setting the intention that your day as well as your week is productive but not stressful and your weekend is absolutely rejuvenating. Have yourself a fabulous day!~ 💜💜💜

Oooooh a long ask! Ok, Imma try to answer in order not to miss anything.

First, thanks so much for reaching out! I was having a terrible night and you made it better, you have no idea how much it means to me! I'm super happy you like my little nonsense, I hope you'll keep appreciating!

I can't say I take requests, but I also can't say I don't take requests, so really you and others can shoot your shots! At best I'm gonna draw it, at worst I'll kindly decline or keep the request in my inbox until I feel like doing it. The thing is, I can't really "open" requests since my doing them vary a lot depending on my health, so I'd need to open/close it every other day and it'd be a hassle for everybody. Just ask, you lose nothing by doing it, I swear I don't bite <3

Now, for our favorite sleepy boys-

-looks like Silver attracted a whole other kind of animal this time.

(Once again, thank you so much for the kind message, I'm literally glowing despite today being a bad day, and the request was too cute for me not to take forty minutes to do it <3)

[sharklovingaquarist]

My experiences with animal sciences and how practices within them signal issues with women's health. Another long one, sorry ya'll

So someone reblogged my post about the OBGYN field saying that animals in America are treated better than women. What a coincidence that I ran into this issue today! So I was in veterinary science for four years in high school. I had a vet assistant certification and was in the FFA (Future Farmers of America). And when I tell you this inference is not too far off, I mean it. I wouldn't say they're treated better, but the general attitude towards the female body is very much more visible, they dont try to hide it with animals. You can also see connections in many practices. When I got into it, there was also a slight uncomfortable tinge when our class came to reproduction and reproductive techniques that always targeted the female body. Well, first when we looked at endocrine systems, the male was always described as existing for himself. Testosterone was for muscles and strength. But with female, her endocrine was always surrounded with sex and offspring. Estrogen was for going into heat and "being impregnated". Progesterone was to "support a fetus" not help her survive a pregnancy. This really does connect back to the female body being seen as the reproductive tool of the male body. The sole focus in fertility. We still don't even know much about the female endocrine seperate from the focus on offspring. And that goes onto practices. Vaginal speculums, inducing estrus, artificial "insemination", much more. I dont wanna say too much, but my school bred animals. Once they talked about how they induced one of the animals into an estrus by implanting a hormonal device in the cervix. Something about it rubbed me the wrong way, because they never do that to male bodies to increase sperm quality. At most they collected sperm from a male animal, but usually willingly.

So what happened today? I shop on chewy for my pets, and I saw estradiol for animals. I was confused at first and wondered why someone would need that, but I remembered how animals are induced. So I clicked hoping it wasn't the case. Nope that's the case. However when you read further you see there's actually some benefits to estradiol for some individuals. So let's analyze this.

The first thing you see in description is: "Estradiol is used to induce estrus, a state of sexual receptivity during which the female will accept the male and is capable of conceiving."

So let's address how using estrogen for this purpose is just really weird. Excess estrogen can cause a lot of health issues, most notably (to me at least) CANCER. Animals go into estrus on their own. Also let's talk about "will accept the male". So sexual selection doesn't exist anymore? That's the thing with this crowd. They see female hormones as something robotic. They think estrus makes females bend over to any male they find. And again, why is there almost never something for males to decrease chances of sperm deformity?

Ok let's go down to uses: "Estradiol can be used to enhance estrus behavior and receptivity in ovariectomized mares and aid mares with estrogen-responsive urinary incontinence."

So they're saying you use this product to increase estrus symptoms in mares who have had their ovaries removed. Why? Fuck if I know. Could be behavioral, I doubt surrogacy due to a lack of ovaries (most responsible for hormone synthesis). So Imma go to the next part. When you get to the bottom you see that it helps urinary issues. So now we are FINALLY at the part where it actually benefits a female body and not just making a female into a breeding machine. So it does have a benefit, it can help female animals with incontinence! It's just that they are valued as production rather than a living being

Finally we get to precautions: "Estradiol is contraindicated during pregnancy as it can cause fetal malformations of the genitourinary system and induce bone marrow depression in the fetus. Estradiol cypionate should not be used to treat estrogen-responsive incontinence in small animals."

So I was actually kinda surprised they explained why (AND TESTED) why a hormone/medication shouldn't be used during pregnancy! Usually, with animals, they actually admit they never tested it with pregnant animals, of which I suspect to be the same with humans. They'd rather just say "yeah uh don't take it" instead of actually paying attention to female bodies, because again you are just a vessel. Also the fact that they never test how medications effect male reproduction, thats something that carries onto humans aswell. They would never limit a man even if he causes issues to another human. Anyways, my reasoning as to why they actually knew this time comes down to them paying close attention to female hormones... but only when it comes into play with a fetus. Trust, they know ALLLLLLL about the female body- WHEN ITS ABOUT A FETUS THOUGH! And again we see the death and malformation of a fetus as a negative for the fetus and not the female. They don't mention how this situation could ALSO effect the female animal. I would assume natural abortion would take place, which is dangerous. The thing is they'll study the effects on a fetus not a living breathing female. And throughout my experience with animals, I've learned that a reproductive adult will always be more valued by nature than a fetus. The health of your parent animal dictates success the most. However you always hear about how to stay pregnant or support fetal growth, the best thing to focus on is FEMALE HEALTH. We aren't vessels. However humans seem to have that twisted. I'll get into that on another post with prenatal vitamins.

So take what you want from this and run, if you've even gotten this far. I know it was long. Im still in science, just non-mammalian. I am by no means a professional but I feel the need to put my feelings out there. To all the feminists in medical or any other biological sciences, I wish you luck. Shit is so tiring.

[josephquinnswhore]

i'm having a kinda rough week and i just want pedro and reader lying on a couch in a living room and he's in one of his cozy cardigans, on top of reader while them playing his soft curls, giving him some kissies and he's slowly dozing off

i LOVE your writing<3!! and this is my first ever req to ur blog i hope u'll do it!!

(and i hope u having/had a great day <3!!)

Content - pedro pascal x female reader

Summary: lazing on the lounge with Pedro is the perfect way to spend your afternoon.

Word Count: 0.8k

Content warning: Fluff! Tiny bit of sadness if you squint.

Note: I’m so sorry to hear you’re having a rough week. I feel you, so imma write this for you. This is the sweater I imagine Pedro wearing. Hope you feel better soon and love this fic 🫶🏼 feel free to send me a message if you wanna talk to someone. Also I’m sorry this is short my brain is fried from being mentally in a bad place :(

After the week you’d had all you wanted was Pedro. Nothing more, nothing less. The stress in your life was building, like a water in a balloon begging to burst at the weight it couldn’t bare, like the balloon, you couldn’t bare the weight on your shoulders any longer.

Pedro had asked what you’d wanted to do today, how you wanted to spend the day, if at all with him. Of course you did, you needed him, he was your lifeline when things got tough. He would guide you through the darkness like a torch with everlasting batteries, as long as you needed him, his light never dimmed.

“What do you wanna do today sweetheart, hm?” The softness of his voice drew you into his comfort, the way his fingers curl around your hair as he scratches your scalp sends tingles down your spine in delight, relieving you of some thoughts that had been bothering you.

“Can we stay inside today, just wanna lay down an cuddle if that’s okay.” You notice how his brows pinch momentarily, you begin to wonder if he had wanted to do something productive today. Before you could start to overthink he takes your hand and leads you to the living room, and sits you down on your couch.

“Of course we can sweetheart. You get yourself comfortable, I’ll put on a movie.” With the palm of your hand, you squish the pillow that’s already on the lounge until it’s comfortable to your liking, it sinks under your head and the pressure that had built in your neck seemed to disappear once the weight of your head was no longer held up.

Pedro turns to you once he’s out on the movie; one of your favourites. The picture on the screen is almost hypnotising, your comfort movie being one you’ve watched hundreds of times, a fine distraction.

“Move your legs sweetheart.” He pats your legs, trying to sit near your feet but you protest, keeping your legs still. “Can you lay on top of me?” You make grabby hands at him and he understands, smiling at you as you beg for his affection, he shifts his body and gently lowers himself down on top of you, you open your legs to make room for his and curl your own around him.

The weight of him makes you sigh in content, he wasn’t worried about crushing you, you’d done this dozens of times; he knew when you’d asked him to do this you really needed it, there was never a time he’d denied your request, how could he? When he could physically feel your body relax u der him, the tension in your body melts like butter. He notices how your breathing always regulates and becomes more calm, no more deep and rushed breathing. The thing he loves the most is when your fingers curl around his hair, especially that spot on the nape of his neck.

“You’re so strong. I’ve always admired your resilience you know, you don’t always have to be so brave for everyone.” Although his voice is quiet, it still rumbles as it vibrates on your chest. The confession is sweet, like honey it sticks; you would remember this eternally. You reply with a kiss to the top of his head.

His head is on your chest, rising and falling with you as you take steady breaths. You reach up and pull the blanket that sits on top of the lounge, adjusting it to cover the both of you as he watches the movie.

You’re too distracted to concentrate on it though, too enamoured by the softness of Pedro’s curly hair, tugging lightly at the nape of his neck, you feel the goosebumps form on his skin as you do so. His body becomes slightly heavier as he relaxes into you, the weight creating a sensation of something familiar to a weighted blanket, but also weightlessness. You feel calm, like you never had nothing to worry about in the first place.

With your free hand you rub your hand up and down his left arm, he tightens it around your waist as he tucks it under your back, as if he could possibly get any closer. Pedro was losing it, between the fingers tangled in his hair and the gentle caress of your hand on his arm, his eyelids feel heavy, he feels bad for it. He’s meant to be taking care of you, knows how badly you’re feeling and wants to take care of you, but he can’t help it; it’s almost like a spell and he’s compliant in its entirety.

You notice him fighting it, eyelids fluttering open every few seconds and head jolting trying to stay awake, “go to sleep baby.” You mumble. The softness of his sweater between your fingers makes it easy to glide your hand back and forth in a gentle caress.

He had you; he always had you. You were never going to fall with this man in your life; he would catch you, every time, no matter how many times you’d fall. You couldn’t help the smile on your lips as his chest heaves and the little snores that escape his lips. Yeah, things would be okay.

[thepouletgalactique]

Annular Eclipse Fairy / Kreslas Reference

I'm finally releasing a little project I've had in mind for a long time. @ayyy-imma-ninja's incredible universe inspired me, so I decided to make a crossover between our two universes.

I hope you like this little project, @ayyy-imma-ninja 🥺

For now, this is just the prologue. The plot will feature @ayyy-imma-ninja's 3 fairies as well as characters I've invented myself for the sequel. Please be patient~

Warning: this little story is not canon to @ayyy-imma-ninja's, please don't associate what I do to what Meg does. My work is less qualitative than what she produces, so please consider this plot as fanfiction. Respect her work.

Now good reading~✨

(Production dated 11/02/2023)

-- Prologue Part 1 --

Kreslas : You're not in bed yet?

Gysper was leaning against what looked like a miniature handmade desk, lit by a firefly set against the wall of their den. 

He quickly turned his gaze to where the voice emanated from.

It was Kreslas, crouching at the edge of the entrance.

The two fairies lived in a tree cavity with other congeners of several different species. Fairies tended to live alone; nevertheless, over time, they had organized themselves into a community, like an isolated village in the middle of a forest. Each had its own den to live in, with the exception of the Rain Fairy, who had long since decided to take in the wild Eclipse Fairy, which was frowned upon in the village.

Gypser : And you're back late from your rounds.

Night had now fallen for several hours and darkness had blanketed the sleepy village. Only the gleaming pupils of Kreslas and his imposing silhouette stood out in the night.  

The Eclipse fairy went inside and answered.

Kreslas: The surveillance team and I were quite busy this evening... 

For Kreslas, strange things had happened today, but he preferred to avoid the subject, as Gypser was usually quite anxious. He turned the conversation to what was keeping his companion awake... He approached to look over his shoulder, placing one hand on the other, and asked.

Kreslas: What's keeping you up so late? 

Gypser hurriedly put away the parchments he'd been scribbling on a few moments ago. 

Gypser: Nothing special, I had things to do.

Kreslas raises an eyebrow with an amused smile, he wasn't fooled. In fact, he knew what the little fairy was up to. 

Kreslas: Ho "nothing special” ? Like how to organize food supplies for this winter? You know there's still 5 months to go.

Unmasked by his intentions, Gysper tried to justify himself by stammering. 

Gypser: Autumn is approaching soon, I can feel the seasons changing. Rainy, cold weather is just around the corner. We need to make sure all food stocks are full for the village. And also calculate the expiry of food; organize stocks by type of food; calculate rations; above all plan for emergency reasons; also plan for potential problems and...

Still smirk on face, the big fairy watched him explain himself, gesturing all the while. He straightened up, then crossed his arms, unconvinced by his answer.

Seeing that Kreslas didn't approve of his excuses, he stopped, sighed and placed his hands on the desk. His fingers tightened slightly in concern over the parchments on the desk. 

Gysper: I'm just forward-thinking... And worried... Especially after the thefts that took place there a while ago…

Kreslas: I know, I just don't like to see you so stressed... Don't worry, we'll find who did this.

He says, trying to reassure him. 

Gysper: I'm not so much worried about who did it, but about the repercussions it could have. I've got a bad feeling about this. I don't want the village to be endangered in any way.

Anxiety growing in his voice as well as in his being, he closed his eyes, calmed down for a moment and then smiled slightly. 

Gypser: But I don't doubt you, you've always been a good hunter.

In a burst of tenderness, he rose from his chair and embraced the waist of his partner. 

Feeling those tiny hands clasping me, his heart vibrated from within his chest. Teasingly, he continued.

Kreslas: On the other hand, when the prey come to me on their own, things simplify considerably.

Easily, he lifted him up and nibbled lightly on his neck with his sharp teeth, all the while making comical mouth noises that made Gypser burst out laughing. 

Their sizes were very significant. Kreslas usually towered over the other fairies by a head, measuring around 20 cm/7.9 inch, while Gypser was a head shorter than the others, measuring more like 13 cm/5.2 inch.

They enjoyed the moment embracing each other for a few seconds, before Gypser asked curiously.

Gypser: Tell me what happened, it's not often you're home this late...

Kreslas lifted his head from his shoulder to stare at him. Hesitant to answer, he put him down. 

Kreslas: The patrol and I found a trap... In the stock that was stolen a few weeks ago...

He tilted his head.

Gypser: Do you think it's the same fairy who came to steal? Could it have come from other villages in the area?

Kreslas: No, I don't think it was a fairy, the trap was far too... heavy and sophisticated to be a trap built by a fairy. I also found footprints. Footsteps from "bigger than us".

Gypser jumped.

Gypser: Could they be fairy hunters?! I thought there hadn't been any for a long time! 

Kreslas: It could be one of them. The "bigger than us" are evolving, but we're still desired creatures. The village has faced hunter attacks in the past, so we need to be on our guard. The theft last time may have been a way of knowing that this stock belonged to fairies or an animal, so I was stupid to suggest that the village ransom the entrance...

Gypser: You're not stupid, you wanted to do the right thing to keep the village safe. It's a good thing this stockpile isn't close to the village. We need to alert the other villages around here. 

Kreslas: I don't understand why they didn't warn of a potential intrusion earlier. The day shift hasn't heard from them for a while... They've sent signals again today, with no response.

Gypser: That's really strange... I hope nothing's happened to them. 

A few seconds of thought passed before the Eclipse fairy spoke again.

Kreslas: Tomorrow I'll go and check on you, flying high in the foliage so as not to attract attention. You, spread the word in our village and try to get out as little as possible. We have to be careful.

His heart raced at the idea of Kreslas moving away from the village; he'd done it to parts before, but not in such an urgent situation. 

Gypser: Please, be careful... 

Seeing Gypser's anxiety grow in his eyes, he smiled slightly and stroked one of his petals.

Kreslas: I promise. 

Gysper remained tense all the same. Staring into space, he was already thinking the worst, biting his thumbnail in stress. Kreslas took his hands, slipping his fingers between his own. 

Kreslas: But now it's time to rest.

Trying to dodge Kreslas' directions, he turned back to his desk. 

Gysper: But first I just have a couple of things to finish-

He let out a small gasp of surprise before finishing his sentence. Kreslas had already caught him before he could reach his chair, pinning him down with his arms and lifting him off the floor. A teasing smile played across his face. 

Kreslas: Where are you going? No more excuses now. At ease! 

The little fairy jiggled as she tried to shake him off. 

Gysper: Hey, it'll only take a few minutes!

Kreslas: You always say the same thing and end up falling asleep with your nose on your desk! You can continue tomorrow with a clear mind. 

A small chuckle came from Gypser's mouth, then he sighed, defeated. 

Gysper: Okay, okay, but I need you to put me down so I can change. 

He chuckled before putting it down gently and setting up his extinguisher. Gysper looked for something to change into for the night. 

Krelas, for his part, didn't have any specific clothes to rest in, so he contented himself with watching his partner frantically rummaging through his belongings.

But his attention was suddenly drawn to something outside, far away in the gloom. He began to stare intently at the outside of the den.

An unexplained shiver ran down his spine.

Something was bothering him, the wind was blowing abnormally for him, but he couldn't explain it. Krelas was very familiar with the sounds of foliage from his wilderness days, before he met Gysper. The sound of nature was no longer a secret to him. 

He continued to examine the void, unable to look away. A bad feeling was slowly creeping up on him. Was it paranoia?

Gypser had chosen his outfit and was about to put it on when he watched Kreslas furtively scan the entrance. Curious and concerned, he asked. 

Gypser: Is everything all right? Did you see anything? 

His companion's voice roused him from his torpor, and he shook his head to regain his composure. 

Kreslas: No, everything's fine. I'm just a little tired. Let's get some sleep...

He didn't want to worry any further with unfounded premonitions. 

Yet Gypser's anxiety had not subsided. Kreslas still had some wild attitudes, including his sensitivity to the dangers and things around him.

Just as he was about to ask the same question, a rumbling sounded behind the trees. Something was approaching at high speed, a creature looming up in front of them. The two fairies had never seen anything like it before. 

The creature before them was black with spinning wings, linked on either side by metal rods, producing a deafening din. It also had a sturdy, smooth black frame. A silver logo representing two Laurel branches, a crown and a pistol bullet were visible on its sides. Finally, an intense red light resembling a eye seemed to be watching them intently with lifeless and emotionless.

The creature was facing them. Blocking the only exit, pointing something at them.

Taken by surprise, both were frozen, time seemed to stand still for a moment. Gypser's eyes widened. Petrified on the spot, he clutched his clothes tightly. For Kreslas, the only priority was to protect Gypser. Instinctively, he rushed towards Gypser, hoping to reach him in time. 

Kreslas: Gypser! Get down!

In his rush, the metal monster fired. An explosion followed by a dazzling flash then a thick cloud of nauseating smoke gradually filled the room. 

Kreslas was thrown against the wall of their lair and lost sight of Gypser.

Other vermin of the same type arrived on either side of the village and fired into the other dens. Taken by surprise, few fairies managed to escape. Those who did were either captured by nets and dragged to the ground, or crushed by the flying things hurtling at them.

Disoriented, Krelas got to his feet despite the pain. His head was spinning and nausea was rising in his throat, the shock had weakened him. He groped the walls for his companion. His vision was blurred by the thick smoke and the wounds inflicted by the explosion. 

After a few minutes of fruitless searching, his strength suddenly left him due to the cloud of gas.

Sore and feeling his body getting heavier and heavier, he collapsed to the ground while, outside, the cries of other fairies echoed under the explosions. 

The cold ground kept him slightly awake.

Powerless, he used the last of his strength to concentrate on the surrounding noises, the cries and explosions continuing for a few minutes until silence returned. Then the ground began to tremble, as something climbed the tree where he was standing. A white light blinded him and swept across their now messy dens. Unknown voices broke the silence.

??? : There are still some here. 

??? : They are completely stunned? 

??? : Yep! The drones did their job well, I see.

Kreslas felt his body leave the ground as a large, warm hand reached out to examine him. He barely had time to make out the man's silhouette before he lost consciousness. 

This was the beginning of the end...

-------------------------------------------------------- Prologue Part 1 - Prologue Part 2 (Soon) - Chapter 1 (Soon)

[quilly72]

Chloe held the camera high as she snapped a photo. Her eyes staring longily into the camera as she stared up at it. Chloe attached the phot to her file. She had just applied to an experimental growth hormone that was about to do a clinical trial throughout the local valley. Chloe watched as her confirmation email came back hoping that she would receive word that she had been one of the lucky participants.

…

3 weeks later Chloe woke up her doorbell ringing 3 minutes before her alarm went off. She strectched her tiny frame trying to strectch larger than 4'11" as she slumbered off her bed. Chloe reached for her blouse as she buttoned it up. Her hair messy and undone. She found a pencil neck skirt laying across the floor. She slipped one leg into it and then the other as she shimmied it up her frame. Finally she slipped on a pair of high heels to give the illusion of being average. The clicking of her heels ringed throughout her empty apartment as she made her way for the front door.

She peaked out as she saw no one. Eventually deciding to crack open the door as she peered outside. A small box sitting in front of her door as she yanked it inside.

She opened it methodically. It was addressed to her but she didn’t recall asking for any deliveries. She opened the small package up as several pills individually wrapped rolled around. An instruction pamphlet buried underneath them.

“congratulations you have been chosen for the beta run of GtsGro new product. Please take 1 pill a day for the next two weeks and record your experience at the website…”

She trailed off. She squeeled as she threw up her hands. She hadn’t even known they had chosen her or remembered her. She had thought she had been denied several weeks ago. Chloe loomed over the box as she plucked out a single pill twirling it in her hands. She picked up her phone dialing her workplace. “Hey uh Jenn hey yeah it’s me Chloe I don’t feel too good today I think imma call a sick day. Mmhh yeah alright see you next week.”

She threw her phone to her couch as she unpackaged the pill. It slipped into her pam as she rolled it back and forth. Her eyes staring at it greedily. Everything she had ever wanted. No more short jokes no more inconveniently placed shelves in her own house. A chance to be taller.

She threw the pill back without a second thought. It’s pungant taste sitting in her throat as she coughed. She doubled over as she waited for it to kick in. “Any second now”

Nothing happened her body sat in silence as she sat. “No please work you can’t not work.” She sped through the pamphlet looking for an ETA. The instructions giving her no head way.

She humphed as she sat down. Crossing her arms as she grew miffed. “I’ll give it an hour”

She lost focus as she turned the TV on her feet twitching her heels growing. Tighter.

She stared at the tv roving on about useless politics. Not even noticing her feet slowly swelling. Her heels groaning as she watched them swell. She winced as her strap dug into her skin. “Last time I buy a cheap pair of heels” she muttered as she flipped the channel. Resituating her feet so they fit a tiny bit better.

Chloe grew unaware as her body slowly swelled at the tiniest levels. Her boobs slowly pushing up. Her d cup bra slowly pressing in on her expanding bust. Similarly her hips slowly trickled outward. Her waistband getting slightly snugger as she continued to flip through the tv.

An hour passed as Chloe sat up and looked at herself. “Nothing” she muttered.

She looked at the box as she plucked another pill out. “Maybe the first one was a dud” she unravelled the second one as she popped another pill an hour after the first. The bitter taste overcoming her again as she gagged and coughed.

She recovered as she lean back on her couch. 30 minutes passed as Chloe began to lose faith. She finally went to cave in as she felt her ass jiggle. “What was that” she turned as she saw it happen. Her skirt growing tighter. Her booty indenting the fabric out as it pushed it outwards.

She squeeled in excitement. “It’s working it’s actually working”

She watched as the skirt grew tighter and tighter her ass slowly filling out. Her body heating up as she groaned. Her hands flew forward to her chest as her boobs jiggled and swelled forward. “It’s actually happening”

Her boobs pushed over her tight bra. Her blouse buttons strectching out opening slight windows where her bust started to peak through

Her legs trembled as her feet swelled out. Her heels snapping off. “Oh fuck I forgot about those” she slipped her heels off as her legs grew out. Gainingan inch as they slid across the hardwood.

Chloe was ecstatic her dream coming true finally growing to a normal height as she strectched out. She pressed her hands against her hips. Her bone structure slowly widening and pushing out against her skirt which would soon be too tight for her. Her thighs swelled out. Touching each other as they crammed Into the tightskirt. Her legs being pinned together slowly.

Her boobs twitched again as they swelled another cup sizes now double D’s. Her blouse popping a button at the top as they peaked out. Her boobs bulging over the cups as the straps began to dig into her.

Chloe sized herself up as she felt her body twitch and jerk. Something was wrong. Her face turning giant as she looked at the clock 2 hours since her first pill.

Her body began steadily growing. Her ass was first the zipper on her tight skirt slowly unraveling down her kegsm her butt pressing further and further out. Her hips widening bytge second as they slowly filled out. Chloe lost her enthusiasm as she grew. “Not this big I only wanted to be normal this is way too much”

She gulped as her boobs swelled further. Her blouse popped a button then a second button. “I don’t think is hould of taken that second pill” she muttered.

She flew to the instructions as she read through them. Her bra creaked and spasmed. Her boobs pushing it further off her body. Her straps dug into her skin digging their grave in her. Her panties growing uncomfortably tight. Her legs pressed up. Her thighs slowly growing out of her skirt as her clothing covered less and less.

Her blouse raised up her stomach as her belly peaked out from underneath. Her eye line growing up inch by inch slowly but surely.

“okay right here please go to gtsgro.com and file a complaint with height and measurements the more Infi the better.

She raced to her kitchen cabinet grabbing a measuring tape. She stood next to it as she let it fall to the ground. “70 that’s what 5 ft… TEN!” IM A FOOT TALLER”

She quickly wrapped the tape across her bust her boobs now 3 sizes larger. Her boobs suffocating under her bra as they bulged over. Her blouse popped off as it barely covered half her torso. Her eye line raised up again. Her zipper fell all the way to the bottom as her skirt fell for he ground. Her panties not far behind.

She reached up to her cleavage as she pried her bra off the fabric splitting at the straps as she tore it off her body. She watched as she continued upwards. Remeasuring herself. “Fuck it’s getting faster I’m almost 6'6”“ she said as she watched her previous mark fall below her eye line again. She rolled her eyes as she got her hips.” 60 inches that’s double what I was. “

Her Boobs pooped forward. Now pushing h cups more than likely.

Chloe raced to her computer. The machine taking it’s sweet time to power on. Her panties shredded as she punched the website in. Her fingers far thumbing multiple keys as she struggled to type. She stood completely naked as she tried to type out a complaint

“I’m too big it’s not gonna work I can’t even type anymore. She scrolled through her options.” Video I can do a video. “

She clicked on the option resetting her webcam to a functioning angle. She stepped back forgetting she was completely naked. She spurted up again. She lifted her arms her hands scraping the top of the room. "What am I 8 ft tall. She stared around” I’m as tall as the door fuck why did I take 2”

Thinking fast Chloe grabbed her bed sheet and wrapped it around her toga style. Her boobs already bulging over it as she spurted as she tied the knot. Her crotch barely covered by the edge of the cloth. She leaned forward. Her cleavage descended down into view as she hit the record button. Her voice shaky and concerned as she started her complaint video.

She stepped back revealing her massive body that was still growing.

“okay umm Last I checked I’m 8 ft tall… and I can touch the ceiling! ” She said as if that would help. She lifted her hand up. Her palm now flat against the roof. Her elbow bending slightly. She stoped for a second as she felt her body… twitch again. She wrote it off as she continued.

“I took 2 pills in one day” she flashed an awkward smile realizing how stupid that made her look" and in the last 2 and a half hours I’ve grown 3 ft gained 10 cups sizes and have a 70 inch ass"

Her body twitches and shook again. Her stomach dropping as if she was about to fall.

“I’m sorry I feel. Weird. I think somethings about to happen. Chloe paused.

She waited in silence 1 second 2 secon.

She shot up quickly and massively

Eeeeeeeek she shrieked as she spurted up. Her legs planted against the floor as shezoomed upwards. Her head hitting the ceiling as she fell forward. She careened I to her setup. Her monitor and camera falling to the floor. She tried to call for help but before she could she spurted again. Another shriek filling the room as she curled into a ball to fit. Her toga shattered around her.

Her back punched the ceiling. Her feet bending her wall backwards as they tried to grow through it her head and neck bending into her own cleavage as they’d truffled to fit. “Too big I didn’t want this I didn’t want any of thIIIISSS”

She spurted up again. Her cleavage and face pushing into her dining room. Her boobs dragging across the door knocking chairs and tables to the ground. Her feet punched outside as she fell flat. Her back still pinned against the ceiling as she swelled larger. Her feet grew over her dance into the neighbors yard as she heard a scream from behind

Chloe grunted. “Hold it back think of something. Help will come eventually.” She held her breath. Her toes curled outside digging up dirt and flowers as she dug her feet in. Her face shut tight as she wrinkled her eyes and nose. Her teeth gritting. Her body shaking as it tried to grow larger. She whimpered and grunted as her body tried again. She gripped the ground with her hands as she cracked the floor.

Chloe held strong as she felt a third and final wave build up. It built and built before releasing all at once. The pressure washing over her as shesurged larger. Her body demolishing her house in seconds. Her feet punching two giant homes in her neighbors house. She quickly stood up as she swelled again. Her feet now a quarter the size of a house. 50 ft 60 ft 75 100 150.

She continued upwards bigger and bigger Everytime.

Her feet covering her neighborhood as her ody started to slow down around 500 ft.

...

Suddenly off in the distance a house creaked and groaned. She stared as she waited for what was about to happen.

A loud shriek followed by a large door sized foot plowing throughthe house.

The walls sputtered and groaned as she heard a pause and then another scream. Her blonde head shooting throughthe roof of the house. She looked terrified.

The back wall fell as she spurted again. Her cleavage and butt making an appearance so profound even Chloe was a tad jealous.

The house crumbles around her as she spurted again. Her butt covering the remains of her house as she stood up. She began continued upwards as Chloe realized that she wasn’t stopping her growth faster. In her hand a male who was evidently growing way faster than all three of them. She slowly meandered towards them as she tried to gain their attention. Hoping one of them would have the solution.

[estrellami-1]

Okay my love I’m sending you a sad and pathetic prompt and then a cutesy fluff prompt (I thought about just sending you the cute one, I feel like all I’m doing these last few days is feeling awful and not being very productive or fun to be around and I think I was just wallowing when I wrote that comment so absolutely feel free disregard this one if you want) this is the sad one, I was thinking more hurt/comfort vibes:

This is just basically self insert except it’s not me I’m inserting it’s my situation lol, one of their relatives passes away (not Wayne) and on top of that they have to find homes for their loved ones pets that they loved the most of anything in the world when everyone is just telling them to euthanize or that everywhere is full and they’re four states and 16 hours away from the pets so it’s not like they can go pick them up easily if at all, which causes them to get sick/throw up a ton from the sadness and anxiety about the situation - enter the other who takes care of them to make sure they don’t worry themselves to death (if anyone wants to come take care of me and maybe just give me about 3000 hugs a day we could make this a live action roleplay situation lol🥺)

(Sorry this is just me complaining pretty much, the other prompt will be cuter)

Oh my love, you’re allowed to feel bad and wallow. I’m so sorry this happened/is happening!! I can’t give you any real hugs but I’ll give you ALL the virtual hugs I can ❤️

When the World Ends - Part 1

Steve’s voice is trembling when he finally makes the call to Eddie. “Hey,” he manages, letting out a pathetic, airy laugh at how badly his voice shakes on that one word. “Um. Can. Can you come over?”

Eddie’s amazing, so he says, “I’ll be there in ten,” and he is. As soon as Steve opens the door, he murmurs, “What’s wrong?”

Steve bites his lip, invites Eddie in. “Y’know how I never mention my parents?” Eddie hums. “But I always leave in the spring for a couple weeks?”

Eddie nods. “Your grandparents, right?”

Steve nods. Bites his lip again, looks up at the ceiling, trying not to cry. “Um.” He sniffs. “My grandpa passed today.”

“Oh, Stevie,” Eddie murmurs, reaching for him until Steve shakes his head sharply. “What can I do?”

Steve huffs. “What can anyone do?” He wipes his face and begins to pace. “My grandma’s too old to stay on her own now, let alone with all the animals they’ve got, and of course it’s not like her own son would help, not when he could be in Cabo instead, finding new ways to cheat on my mom with his secretary or assistant or her secretary or who the fuck knows. And I want to help but I can’t leave Hawkins, not when everyone else is still here, and there’s still a chance, but it feels so selfish not to go when she needs me-”

“Steve,” Eddie interrupts softly, hands up between them. “Take a breath, man, it’ll be okay. I know you love your grandparents but this isn’t all on you, okay?”

Steve slumps back into the couch like a puppet whose strings have been cut. Says, barely above a whisper, “I’ve got animals out there.”

Eddie hums softly. “What did you say?”

“Animals. Pets. I can’t have them here so my grandparents have ‘em. I’ve got a dog and chickens and a horse and what ‘m I gonna do with them?”

“We’ll figure it out,” Eddie promises him.

Steve groans and stands up again, beginning to pace again. “They’re four states away, Eddie! I don’t have a horse trailer, I dunno anyone in Hawkins who has chickens so I dunno if that’s even allowed, and I can’t bring my dog here!” He runs a hand through his hair, grimacing. “I guess the horse could go back to the neighbor, but they gave her to me for a reason, and I dunno what’s gonna happen to the chickens, and imma have to give the dog away, too, and get my grandma somewhere she can be taken care of, and fuck, there’s still the house-” he chokes on an inhale and a sob, standing still for a moment before he dashes through the house.

Eddie watches, wide-eyed, and follows when the sound of retching reaches his ears. “Oh, Stevie,” he murmurs, dropping to his knees beside him, hand hovering over his back. “Can I touch you? Rub your back?” Between gasping breaths, Steve nods, so Eddie puts a gentle hand on his back, rubbing up and down. “You’re gonna be okay,” he murmurs. “I know how scary this all seems right now, but you’re the strongest person I know, ‘sides Wayne, and you’ve got people who care about you and who’re gonna be here for you very step of the way, okay?”

The puppeteer cuts the strings once again, and Steve sags sideways into Eddie, trying to regulate his breathing, still quietly choking on his sobs. “Want me to call Birdie?” Eddie asks quietly, moving his hand to wrap his arm around Steve’s shoulders.

Steve shakes his head. Says, between breaths, “She’d panic.”

Eddie hums. “And you wanna be okay for her when she panics.” Steve nods. “Okay, I get that. I’m glad you called me.”

Steve sniffles. Eddie hands him some toilet paper. Says, after he’s blown his nose, “Feels like the world’s ending.”

Eddie thrown back into a memory from months ago. “If the world ends again, you know where I am,” he’d said. He hadn’t been sure, at the time, if Steve would call him. But they stayed friends, to the point where Steve calling him wasn’t quite the rarity it used to be, and Eddie doesn’t think he’s ever felt so honored.

“And you called me,” he murmurs, back in the present day, knees sore from the bathroom tile. He knows they’re going to pop like an old man’s when he stands. He decides not to worry about that right now.

Steve nods. “Knew you’d come.”

“And I did,” Eddie nods. Rubs his hand up and down Steve’s arm. “How’re you feeling?”

Steve sniffs again. “Like shit.”

Eddie lets out a soft chuckle. “I probably should’ve guessed. Ready to get up? Or wanna stay here for a minute?”

“Wanna stay here forever,” he says, but shifts to get up.

He stumbles a little when he stands, hissing. Eddie steadies him. “Legs’re asleep.”

“That’s okay, Stevie, I’ve gotcha. Come rinse your mouth out, m’kay? We’re going back to bed. I’m gonna make a few calls, okay?”

Steve won’t look at him in the mirror. “Gonna leave?”

“Not unless you want me to,” Eddie swears. Steve meets his eyes for a brief second. Shakes his head. “Then I’ll stay until you get sick of me.”

Steve manages a shaky smile. “Not possible.”

Eddie sighs contentedly. “Rinse your mouth out,” he gently reminds him. “Let’s get you up to bed.”

When Steve’s in bed, Eddie turns to leave, then turns back just as quickly when Steve grabs his hand. “You’re not leaving?”

Eddie squeezes his hand. “Not leaving. Just gonna make a quick call.”

“Okay,” Steve whispers, but his breathing picks up again, and Eddie changes his mind.

He bullies his way under the covers next to Steve, pulling him in until his face is tucked into Eddie’s neck and Eddie can rub his back. The call can wait until Steve’s asleep, so he can get back before Steve wakes up.

Steve’s world is ending. That’s every bit as important as the world itself ending. So Eddie resigns himself to stand guard over Steve’s dreams, keeping them happy as best he can.

I hope y’all liked this! The fic tag is the name (“#whentheworldends”) and my writing tag is “#starambles”. Remember I’m NOT doing a taglist for these, so subscribe to either to see where this goes next! Send me an ask with the next thing you want to happen in this fic!

[studentbyday]

src: study with me by @marias-studyblr

i spend a surprisingly small amount of my waking hours studying (just 4h today and i had trouble focusing by the 4th hour) which makes me feel less productive than i should be. is this normal? 😅

learning:

reviewed for mol bio quiz and made study guide questions for that section of the module

did the quiz

reviewed week 1 psyc notes and redid the textbook questions

worked a little bit on psyc notes (very very very little)

read half of 1/5 sections of biochem and made study guide questions for that (i always have a really hard time remembering things long-term no matter what i'm studying, so i'm gonna try this thing where i read the module section and make study guide questions as i read, then either later in the day or first thing the next day, i try to answer the questions and compare my answers to what the module says...and if it works for this course, then imma do it for the others)

self-care:

journalled (it is so good for writing down distracting thoughts/feelings!!! but unfortunately, like cbt, it can be uncomfortable)

did my morning routine (often got sidetracked but...at least it got done and physically i felt good. constantly referring to this post bc i kept forgetting what i was supposed to do bc i almost never do them all at once!!)

watched a cinema therapy video (it's my new replacement for feel-good fics)

[obsolete-stars-if]

Progress Update

30th April 2024

Welcome back, everyone. I'm doing this today BCS I dunno if I'm feeling like it tmr morning. So lets review April.

What got done in April: Besides finally releasing chapter 8 and being very happy about how it turned out. I also got a job, can u imagine? someone is paying me to do silly little tasks on my computer. ill be financially stable in no time.

What didn't get done in April: Imma be honest, I haven't written since the day of the update, so my 10k goal is out of the window. there are a lot of different reasons why, after completing multiple art commissions by my friends (to support me in paying for my rent and groceries), I got into a bad mental health week, where I was so exhausted from doing those commissions (I enjoyed creating art for my friends but being forced to take compensation for it is what made me depressed), combined with regular artists financial struggles- I hadn't the energy to write or think much about the game. Then I started training for my new job, and it's also mentally exhausting (the job is fine, the training itself is exhausting). These arent meant as excuses or to defend myself for why I haven't kept up with what I wanted to, but I'm trying to be very honest about my progression and general situation, so people can look into these logs and understand why I slowed down, not BCS I have to keep yall informed, but BCS I want to.

Plans for March: Get insanely rich with my first paycheck. I'll be in direct training for most of the month, so actually writing might take a backseat for a moment, or only be reserved for my days off, or very productive days (as I'm working at nights). I'll set my goal much lower this month, maybe around 5 - 7,5k line, to give myself some more slack and feel like I'm actually accomplishing my goal.

Fun april stats underneath

No, I will never find one coherent way of doing these progress updates. Words written: 7986 avg hours slept per day: 12

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

barking barking, ok so i am rereading a bit of the last chapter and the things i had noted last time so that i remember everything that happened but after that i am loose

having an awful idea to listen to the guitar solo of freebird on repeat as i read this.... i am going to do it there is a rotating rat on the 10 hours version i found, wonderful

SO UH THIS IS MASSIVE SORRY ALSO SPOILERS FOR THOSE WHO HAVEN'T READ CAPS LOVELY NEWEST CHAPTER SCROLL PAST THIS VERY FAST IT MAY TAKE A WHILE. THE READ MORE BUTTON DOESN'T WORK IN ASKS SO SORRY

(i refuse to edit it this time, it took me like. a while last time and this is even longer, so you also get the incomprehensible pieces and no added notes to explain what i meant <3 (also a lot more '<3' this time. not sure why))

MORE CROWS rrr, they are important i know it

the way panthera is surrounded by cats and crows is interesting... like its an amusing visual but also really kick ass if you frame it in your mind right

yes, i enjoy that juleka is confronting ladybug on how she leads, especially considering that we know for sure they are inexperienced, yes i like this conversation

ooo, this is interesting, dust all kicked up focussing on different senses...very fun, always interesting to see how they can rely on things other than sight

woahhh, the staff lets off green sparks?? its made of copper <3 wait i looked it up and... aluminium makes green fire too? huh? this isn't important <33

awesome visual tho

YEAH BEAT HIS ASS BRO roger cop my beloathed <3

massive baby guy would be scary...

yay! teamwork! carapace and panthera woohoo

gonna be honest free birds outro on loop is really setting the mood for fighting for me

stop making me google things cap... t-rexes were apparently in the "late cretaceous" like ok thanks movie franchise for lying to me ig

Rena- this is amazing- she would record that. wonderful descriptors <33

No <3 i do not need the heartbreak of juleka v akumatised rose again <3 stop it <3 you hurt me <3

oh thank god-

this mantra of "calm yourself" is intriguing, i think its not going to work <3 let her go ape shit please

YOO PRINCE SHINING?? NOO

THIS IS BAD ASS THO

HA AND DOWN HE GOES

she's gonna turn this car around road trip with them when?? it can be a well deserved break <3 i am pitching this idea cap <3 this is what i would like and i would like it very much (i kid, its just amusing to me)

no because. because. alya nino and chloe are still able to have fun in a fight and. and- juleka is over here like a war veteran while marinette is trying to corral them all and- upset now

oh no juleka blacked out?? oh dear...

chlolix crumbs... wonderful... (to be honest with you, searching through the chlolix ship tag years ago was why i found these fics, so i love to see them but i am so attached to the story now <33)

OO? violence in your heart juleka?? maim and kill him you say?? good idea <3

“Miss me?” He grinned maliciously. “No, whore.” Queen Bee scowled at her side. i am actually losing it this is the funniest thing i have seen today-

ooo dark cupid being used to farm akumas... this is reminding me of minecraft and zombie villager farming to get the best trades, i can see the video titles now "this hack will TRIPLE your akuma production in just three EASY steps" <- unsure what this is but it happened in my brain, so there you go <3

i do like the idea of dark cupids powers being used tactically like this, i enjoy how its thought out critically when an akuma has an obviously helpful / game changing power

</3 "ma, i'm so exhausted" you are so cruel

AUGH WHAT NO ough rena got got by kim...

marinette kiss her quick

ough emotional

imma be honest for a hot second i thought juleka got hit by dark cupids arrow which i was fascinated by the idea of, however i think if she is to lose self control it would be more interesting if it was due to circumstances than mind altering magic

??? interesting, "there was- for a flash- a blackness that seemed to writhe like a bubbling mass of ink up her fingers—!" curious...

D: chloe... :(

augh my heart... they all got got protecting each other...

YOUR EVIL THIS IS UPSETTING ME

um hello?? who is speaking to her in bold?? am i dumb for not knowing?? girly is hearing voices

kill him!

gigantitan baby cult...

alternate universe where neither of them remember any of the old akumas names and at one point one of the akumas is so offended by the idea of being forgettable its enough of a distraction to get them

not me trying to think about whether a wish could actually be beneficial in any overall capacity using the rules we were given because hawkmoth is saying it would be...

no but why is the fact that akumatised queen bee is just sad making me so upset-

this is such a fucking big chapter jesus christ-

"nicking her ear and taking out one of her piercings" make her design look like gargamels cat azrael 2k18

(thats the wrong year. uh. shhh thats just the auto fill in my head when i say 2k)

hawky boy has gone off the edge of sanity hasn't 'e...

WOAH ONE ON ONE?? OWHUWO

OH NO ITS GOING BADLY

ohno that guy in bold is back at it again being ominous as fuck ohh i am dumb its plagg. yeah that tracks i am but a silly guy

ooo is it happening? is she doing the thing??

YOO THAT WAS BETTER THAN WHAT I THOUGHT OF THAT WAS BADASS YOO??

OUHTFHEDW

really did a bilbo catching the one ring on his finger and turning invisible right when gollum was boutta catch him tense vibes moment i would describe this better but i must get back to reading this was awesome

OOO SHE DID END UP BEING CALM IT WORKED WOHDANW4FIBBDE

THIS IS BAD COMMENTARY I AM EXCITED OK??

augjh=gtfreinig4fgrninib4frnedw

the way that i'm insane for the idea that someone recorded this fight and everyone ends up seeing panthera being a fucking badass has me insane...

mmmm switching the music to metallica

oh that was the right decision perfect base drop timing for what i was reading

ough awoog wibnefr, insane for the way that she is not referring to herself as human rn

awwybgfwei bgyrfned insane for all of this actually

THIS WAS SO FUCKING COOL JESUS CHRIST OH MY GOD ABHWEBHUUNERI I WISH I COULD SHAKE YOU BY THE SHOULDERS AND EXPLAIN ARTICULATELY EVERY DETAIL I LOVED BUT ALAS ALL I CAN DO IS KEYBOARD SMASH AT YOU ACROSS THE INTERNET

love carapce actually <3

“You suck bro. Take an L dude, take an L.” “HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT TO ME– THIS IS MY MOMENT-” “IT’S A RANDOM FUCKING FRIDAY DUDE IT IS JUST A FRIDAY!” Carapace shouted, so frustrated, pinching his fingers together at the man. “YOU’VE WASTED SO MUCH TIME! GET A JOB!” love this so much actually

YO I FORGOT ABOUT MAYURA AND YOU FUCKING NAMED THE CHAPTER AFTER HER BRO

What a wonderful power, she thought. To protect, instead of hurt. stab in the heart why don't you

“HEY LADYBUG WE FOUND A BROKEN STICK!” “I FOUND IT FIRST ACTUALLY!” “I FOUND A FEATHER!” The two simply sighed love them all so dearly actually <3

awoog wiubfrne, whub?? juleka babe girly darling why are you still injured???? ough it was because of the metallica moment (<3 i have my own name for it, the songs i listened to while that was happening was Battery and Master of puppets btw)

well course it didn't heal from the cure, they are exact opposites so their direct effects would cancel out. like a plus and a minus, idiot

Apparently Rose might’ve fought Adam in a random parking lot that they had ended up in because she thought he might’ve hurt her during the attack so.. HWJB4IFE HA she would do that wouldn't she?

“Meh, it happens.” alix??? this is such a hilariously chill response??

nriew more chlolix crumbs...

Alix defended herself passionately, throwing up her hands as icing laid smeared on her lips. She paused for a moment, as Chloe half-heartedly wiped a bit off before continuing THATS GAY GAYY THEY ARE GAY A3WDWEUI sorry i got a bit excited there.

“Don’t worry, I won’t disappear.” “…Sometimes I–” “Yes?” Juleka pepped up. Rose paused and seemingly waved her thoughts away, smiling. “It’s nothing, don’t keep your big bro waiting!” RRRR REVEAL YOUR IDENTITY PLEASE OIGUHER RRRR

no because you somehow manage to keep it being a slow burn after they got together and i'm insane for that

actually they are the most adorable creatures in the universe i love them

I just didn’t think you’d start hearing them now.. huhwuh?? she is supposed to hear voices?????? weird wack ass side effects

ruhroh looks like thats the consequences of your actions nathalie

RUHROH THE CONSEQUENCES OF JULEKAS ACTIONS?? ough she has made herself an extra high value target

Her boy– no. Their boy shut up your in a queerplatonic relationship with gabriel and you both dated emilie in my head. he is your child to me <3 (i will write that damn 200k slowburn unhappy ending prequel i joked about if you fucking force my hand (ie. continue to make reference teeny tiny things like that (or maybe it will just start planning itself in my head right now curse you my brain)))

WAIT THE REST OF THIS PARAGRAPH IS SO SAD SHUT UP YOUR A CRUEL BEAST CAP

Emelie and Gabriel’s boy. He was not her’s. He would never be her’s. She was just– the assistant. The distant guardian. This was all for him though, if she could help– she could just. Maybe.. Nathalie shook her head at herself. What mattered was this family. UPSET NOW

TEARING YOU APART RIPPING YOU APART WITH MY TEETH CAP THIS WAS INCREDIBLE AND THIS TOOK ME OVER 2 HOURS

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I 4yrheiwjnow

you may receive asks in your future about me writing that thing i keep joking about. i am spinning it in my mind like this damn rat

i muted it at times but wanted a timer and uh

this is nearly 1800 words wrong what is wrong with me- yknow what no this is your fault for the monster size of this chapter, anyway, time to slap this beast into your inbox <33

THIS IS MADE ME SO SO SO SOSOSOSOSO SOS O HAPPY.,,,,,,,

THANK YOU SO SO MUCH,, IM GLAD YOU ENJOYED,,,

[indycinders]

I was productive and cleaned my apartment today uvu now I can focus on other things.

It just… idk imma be vulnerable here for min don’t worry about scrolling past ahaha

Healing from trauma and taking meds and actively seeking help feels so… weird. Like you feel like things are falling apart and will never fix themselves when you’re in a crisis. And your crisis could be so simple or little rather than a huge life altering thing. It could just be a culmination of years’ worth of telling yourself that you’re fine and you’re okay. And it builds inside like a pressure cooker until there’s no more room for the pressure and you’re about to explode.

I feel vastly different today than I did two months ago, a few weeks ago, and even yesterday. And you know a part of my brain is like “oh it’s the meds” which yeah definitely. And there’s that little part that’s trying to convince me I don’t need them but I know I do. And it’s been a thing in the past where I stop because it was too hard to wait for them to work, too hard to just be patient and sit with myself.

And I guess that’s what’s so different about this time. I can just sit here in silence and be with myself and let myself feel my feelings and let them go eventually. And I’ll still be here, on the other side of the crisis, alive.

I don’t know. It’s just weird introspection I’ve been doing today. I haven’t cleaned my apartment in weeks but I did today. I did it step by step. Figured it out as I went. Asked for help when I needed it. Took breaks when I needed it. Got myself some water and I’ve drank most of it now.

Being ill, both physically and mentally, is hard. And weird. And having good days is also weird. I’ll probably be laid up in bed the rest of the day but at least I won’t feel guilty about my apartment being messy.

I can hear the birds out my window, see the sun, let fresh air in my apartment without worrying about someone walking past and thinking it’s a disaster in here. I guess today I’m just… happy? Content?

It’s one of those things that remind me why I’ve been holding on for so long and why I’ll continue to do so. It makes me hopeful for tomorrow and next week and next month and on and on.

Healing is rough. It’s not always easy. If it was, sayings like “time heals all” would be redundant. It also looks different. It could be going out to check mail for the first time in weeks. It could be sitting at a park drinking your favorite beverage. It could be cleaning your apartment because you want to, and not because you’re feeling obligated to.

Mm. Just reflecting on myself and my healing today, I guess. Might delete this later haha.

[sapscozycorner]

Hi my name is Gemini ♊ and this is GemEats. Today we are going to be making Garlic Butter Lamb chops with Asparagus and Mashed potatoes... First things first you need your ingredients...

Ingredient list 📃

Lamp Chops 🥩(of course) - You can substitute the lamb with whatever meat you like ie pork chops, or sirloin. You could also make this vegetarian by replacing the meat entirely with a veggie substitute like impossible meat or even grilled eggplant. It's so many ways you can make this dish. Just remember whatever you choose, make sure you season, season, season.

Asparagus 🥬

Russet Potatoes 🥔

Butter 🧈

And Milk 🐮

2. Prep

Now it's prep time 🔪 ... Swing that butcher's knife... show that cutting board who's boss💪🏾

3. Cook it up

Now that you have everything prepared the food should magically pop into a pan... Remember y'all don't be afraid to Flip, stir and toss that food into the air

Lets get a close up of that flipping technique

Imma just add some of my secret sauce to the lamb

Let's see the finished product👩🏾‍🍳

Mmm looks delicious... Lets see what Evan thinks

He loves it😊

Hope everybody enjoyed my first Simtube video.. More to come (since I got fired🪓 ).. Big shout out to @insimniacreations for making this custom recipe (go check out their tumblr). Like, Subscribe, and Share and let me know what y'all want me to make next... Bye

Gemini got fired from her job so she's trying something new... She's trying her hand at making cooking videos on Simtube ( Really I just didn't know what else to do with her. I figured she likes cooking so why not try it out )

Thank you @insimniacreations your custom foods are the best💖

[moonchild-things]

Chapter Thirty-Seven: Tempo

Summary: Shōyō Hinata loves volleyball! There is no doubt that all he really thinks about is volleyball. His sister, however, isn’t the same way. Sakura is ready to start her first year of high school at Karasuno with her twin brother and doesn’t really want to do anything, unlike Shōyō. Though she can’t help it when she gets dragged into the antics of the volleyball club.

Word Count: 6303 

Blog Masterlist | Red Herring Masterlist | Last Chapter | Next Chapter

A/n: Oh I feel so productive! I finished writing this today, finished editing three videos that imma post on my youtube channel in the coming weeks and working on some more, and I worked on my manuscript for NaNoWriMo! Not only that but I got a requested story that I'm working on, it'll take me a bit but I'm finishing up the outline, get it checked and then get to posting some nice long chapters of it lmao Anyway, on with the chapter!

---

EVERYONE COULD TELL THAT SKAURA WAS TENSE about something. It’s usual for her to sit on her own, rarely talk or engage in conversations while at her club. However, from the way that she was even more withdrawn than normal, everyone figured that there was something wrong. They hadn’t seen her like this before, so none of them were really sure how to bring it up to her. After all, what if they said something insensitive to her since they didn’t know what was going on with her. Well, that would matter if the people in this club actually knew how to be considerate of that. 

Which is why Wada had walked over to Sakrau’s table and leaned over towards her. His piercing eyes stared down at her as she looked over some of her notes that she took in class. Feeling the gaze on her, Sakura glanced up to come face to face with Wada and his slightly concerned expression.

“Is everything okay with you, Hinata-chan?”

Sakura stared at him with a normal bored look, “I’m fine,” she leaned away from him, “now leave me alone, please. I’m trying to study.”

“You always study,” He whined, “but you’ve been glaring at that same paper for over thirty minutes and I’m beginning to think you’re trying to start a fire with your mind.”

She sighed heavily through her nose, knowing that he wasn’t just going to leave her alone like she wanted. For most of the day today, she had been fussed over by Yachi. Sakura really does appreciate the fact that she has a best friend who cares about her and her wellbeing, but it got annoying eventually. Of course, Sakura didn’t say that to Yachi at all since she didn’t want to hurt her feelings or anything. So she was hoping that when she came to her own club that no one would mention anything to her.

Though she realized that she only has herself to blame for this. She was acting more withdrawn than usual, zoning out from time to time and getting lost in her thoughts. She figured that out after noticing the strange looks Shimada was giving her. Maybe she should have done a bit better to make it seem like nothing was bothering her. The last thing she needs is for them to bother her as well.

She looked back down at her papers, not really paying attention to what was on it, “And what if I am?”

Wada gave her a look and sighed, “Listen, I know that we all are a bit worried about you…”

“Why would you be?” Sakura snapped.

“Well, I overheard a little rumor about you getting into a fight with your brother.”

Sakura gritted her teeth, “Damn Endo.” She knew that it had to be him who spread it a bit. Let it be known that Sakura hates how drama hungry Endo Joji can be at times.

Noticing how Sakura was growing uncomfortable and annoyed, Mori decided to speak up. Her heavenly voice said, “Wada, please. If Hinata-chan doesn’t want to talk about anything, then we don’t have to push her.”

“I mean…” Emi trailed off as she, Wada, Yokoyama, and Ito all shared a look with each other. “We all are curious.”

Sakura just grunted, “It’s just personal issues with my brother, that’s all.”

“Oh! Though I heard that you were actually fighting your brother and Kageyama-kun!” Yokoyama exclaimed, a bit excited at the prospect of a fight. She smiled widely, “You must have gotten quite a few punches in, right?”

“No,” Ito shook her head, “she’s too short to throw a proper punch, she definitely went for the legs.”

Wada pursed his lips, “Though her brother is the same height, no?”

“But are you hurt!?” Emi then shouted, becoming extremely worried, “Oh, they would definitely be able to hurt you badly! We-”

Sakura cut off any other stupid rumors or speculations that they could make with a harsh glare, “Can you guys shut up.”

All of them shuttered at the menacing look on Sakura’s face. They could all feel the impending aura surrounding them as Sakura glared at them. They collectively shouted out in fear, “Y-Yes Ma’am!”

With it being obvious that Sakura didn’t want to talk about any of this with them, they decided to leave it alone. They didn’t want to push Sakura too far to the point that she left or anything. So they needed to move on and focus on something else, whether that be showing off some of their photos or complaining about their recent grades. However, there was only one person who seemed to be a bit more 

“You know, it’s okay to say that you’re hurt.” Mori Aiko said softly as she leaned against Sakura’s table. 

“I’m not,” Sakura rubbed her head, “Shōyō couldn’t hit hard enough to leave a bruise or anything.”

Mori gave her a knowing look, one that made Sakura shift uncomfortably in her seat. The crystal blue eyes of the vice president were seemingly looking right through Sakura, and she didn’t really like that. Mori continued to say, “Not physically, emotionally. It’s okay to say that he hurt your feelings, because I can see that it did.”

Sakura looked away from her, not exactly the best at talking about things like her feelings. She played with her fingers for a moment, trying to decide on what to say. “I know he didn’t mean to hurt me or anything, but it did hurt to realize that I couldn’t help him, I guess.” She gnawed on her bottom lip, “Shōyō is the more emotional out of us, and I always know how to help him or see a logical side to things. This time I don’t know. I’ve just… I’ve realized that we need space. My brother and I have been attached at the hip for too long.”

“Did you not think it was healthy?”

“Maybe.” She shrugged her shoulders, “Before I went to bed last night, I had a thought; I had been using Shōyō as a shield to hide from everything, I guess. I used him as an excuse for a lot of things, to explain how I acted or why I did things. Now, after…” There was a little bit of a grimace on her face, “Last night I figured that it’s time to distance myself from that. I’m a high schooler now, I need to learn about myself and not just be a shadow to my twin.”

There had always been a part of her that knew this fact. Knew that she was not really her own person and was hanging onto her brother for far too long. She’s known that ever since she started high school, that’s why she tried to branch out by means of the photography club! She wanted to be her own person, but never really had the push to really make it a reality for it. Though perhaps after last night, this could be the right push that she needed. She didn’t really picture it being because her brother would hurt her, but whatever it was was still good enough to get her on that track.

“That’s very mature of you, Hinata-chan.” Mori smiled, breaking Sakura out of her thoughts, “Realizing that must not have been easy.”

Sakura just shrugged her shoulders, “it was a bit uncomfortable to come to terms with, I guess. Though it’s the truth, so I can’t really deny it or run from it.”

“Still, it's very impressive of you."

"Impressive?” The younger girl pursed her lips. Her cheeks were a bit pink now that she was complemented by such a pretty girl, “Maybe."

“Just make sure you talk with your brother about it. So you both are on the same page.”

Sakura nodded her head, knowing that it was definitely a good idea. So the two were then absorbed back into whatever conversation the rest of their club members were having. Mori felt happy to give Sakura an outlet to talk a bit more about her issues, and Sakura felt lighter to have actually articulated what was running through her head.

---

When it got considerably later in the day, it was time for students to be heading home. Sakura had only stuck around in her club a bit longer because she somewhat dreaded having to see her brother. After all, she knew that they had to have quite the important conversation when they actually got home. She was anxious about it, there was no denying it. Sakura could stand up to other people for her brother, but talking to him about something like this left her nervous. They’ve never really had a moment in their lives where they would have to question their relationship or have serious conversations.

Surprisingly, Shōyō hadn’t been around to nag Sakura about her riding home by herself. Sakura wasn’t sure what to think about it, nor did she even know where he was! She noticed that his bike was still at the bike rack but with practice over she would have figured that he would already be gone or him waiting for her. It certainly was concerning. Though she brushed it off, it had to just be that he was avoiding her somehow. It certainly had become uncomfortable between them since last night so she could understand that.

So perhaps she would get to ride home on her own for once. Even as she grabbed her bike and mounted it, the nagging feeling of the unknown location of her brother was bothering her just a bit. It wasn’t like him to just not be around and not leave some sort of note for her about where he was. Though it’s not like she was really expecting him to since he knew she was somewhat avoiding him. 

Most of the time when the twins got into an argument there were a few things that would happen really. If it was some small disagreement, Shōyō would bother Sakura to the point of annoying her and eventually the two would forget anything happened. If it was something a bit more severe, like this time, they would keep their space from each other. Shōyō kept away to keep any further arguments from happening, until the two cooled off to apologize and then made up. That rarely ever happened since the two never got into large arguments, but it wasn’t impossible.

As she rode home on her own, Sakura was preoccupied with trying to map out what she was going to say to her brother. After all, she had to make her intentions clear. It was the right opportunity, the time to explain her growing feelings about wanting to have distance. Though her mind was thinking about how he was going to react to what she wanted. Would he be angry? Upset? Would he yell at her? Argue with her? Sakura couldn’t be certain about what he would do. This was uncharted territory, if she was being honest with herself.

She arrived home sooner than she thought, too caught up in her mind to really notice. So she put her bike away, greeted her mom and sister, and waited in her shared bedroom for her brother to come home. At one point, she was even thinking of writing her thoughts down to give to Shōyō. That way they would be as clear as possible as she was starting to feel like she would be tongue-tied when she actually got to talk to him. 

“Hi mom!” An excited voice that sent ice into Sakura’s chest shouted from the door. There was a conversation from the kitchen as Shōyō bounced around the home, returning from his trip with Coach Ukai and old Coach Ukai. It was quite the eye-opening practice that he had with the old crow coach and the kids out there. He couldn’t wait to tell Sakura about it! He certainly was conflicted when he found that her bike wasn’t still next to his when he got back, but he understood. It was getting late and as much as he wanted to ride with her to make sure that she was fine, like a big brother should, he didn’t expect her to wait forever. Especially since he’s certain she’s upset with him.

There was quite a bit of apprehension swirling in his gut as he made his way to their shared bedroom. As he walked into his room he found Sakura sitting on her bed, propped up against the wall as she read over some notes like usual. The twins stared at each other for a moment. Both were quite anxious about what the other had to say. Shōyō was quite certain that she was angry with him right now, while Sakura was trying to figure out if he would be angry with her after what she has to say.

As Shōyō put his backpack down next to his bed and plopped down onto it. Might as well as get this over with, she thought to herself. Sakura cleared her throat, “Okay, Shōyō, I wanted to say that I’m not angry with you.”

“You’re not?” Shōyō asked, more than surprised by that.

She shook her head, “No. I put myself between you and the King, so I can’t really blame you or anything, it was an accident.”

He let out a puff of air, relieved that she wasn’t upset with him. Though he hastily said, “I am sorry though! I never want to hurt you, accident or not.”

“Which is why I’m not angry with you.” Sakura chucked slightly before sobering, “But I do want to talk with you about… how clingy I am. ”

Shōyō blinked, “Clingy?” That wasn’t a word that he would use to describe his sister. Especially considering she liked to keep herself away from most people and normally just be around him, their family, or by herself. So why would she think that she’s clingy?

“Yea. I mean I have been since we were infants, mom says so.” Sakura tried to make a bit of a joke, though it didn’t land as Shōyō was just staring at her in confusion. “But even all through school and such. I don’t normally stray far from you.”

He tilted his head in confusion, “that’s an issue?”

Sakura pursed her lips, “well, yes.” It took a moment for her to find the right way to say this. She really should have written it down. At least she’d have a plan on what she was going to say. “I just figured that it would be a good idea to have… distance. You know, so we can do our own things.”

She really did lose him after that as Shōyō attempted to try and find where she was going with this. Honestly, he really was trying to understand since he knew this was a serious conversation but he wasn’t seeing where she was  going with this. “Though we already do our own things… I’m on the volleyball team, and you’re in the photography club.”

“That is true, but…” Sakura sighed, “Okay, let me rephrase that. It would be a good idea for me to find my own identity.”

“That doesn’t make sense.” Sakura has an identity. She’s Hinata Sakura! What else could she mean? Oh no! Had he hit her head so hard that she forgot who she was?! This is worse than he thought!!

Before he could freak out about hitting her too hard, Sakura said, “Shōyō, you do know that everyone refers to me as your shadow, your clone. I’m not ‘Sakura’, I’m ‘Shōyō’s twin’.”

He blinked, “Is that wrong?” He wasn’t oblivious enough to not notice that. It had been happening ever since they were little. Sure, when they were a lot younger Sakura was more distinguishable from him since she had longer hair. Though after she got her hair cut sometime in junior high she ended up getting confused with him more often. Considering she kept her hair short, Shōyō didn’t think that she had an issue with that.

“It’s not wrong,” Sakura quickly amended, “but I just… I want to be seen as my own person, you know. When people talk about me or think about me I don’t want their first thought to be Shōyō’s doppelganger’. ”

Shōyō stared at her for a hot moment, trying to understand what she was saying. Was this his fault? Was she actually upset with him and just lying to not hurt his feelings? Had the fight that he had with Kageyama finally driven Sakura to the point where she wanted to distance herself from him? That she felt so annoyed with him that she didn’t even want people to think of her as his twin?

This had to be because being on the volleyball team had made him more emotional. Not to say that he wasn’t emotional about volleyball before they started at Karasuno, but it certainly had escalated. The fight the other day was a good example of that. So was she saying this because she wanted him to not do it anymore? He certainly wouldn’t, but he would consider it for her.

Sakura could see the confusion on his face, figuring that he wasn’t really getting at what she was saying. She tried to make things clear by saying, “There’s nothing wrong with me being called that, but I want to be my own person.”

A sour look consumed his face, “If you don’t like me being on the team you can just say it.”

“That’s not it,” Sakura stated in her own confusion. So he really was taking it the wrong way, just as Sakura had dreaded. How he reached that conclusion, she’s unsure, “I have supported you and your passion, Shōyō, and will not stop doing that.”

“So why do you want to get away from me? Why now?” The only thing, in his mind, that had changed for Sakura to leave him is that he joined the Karasuno team. So that just had to be the reason!

She blinked at the seemingly rising harshness in his words, “It’s not like I just randomly thought of this today.”

“If you had, you would have told me! We tell each other everything, right?”

Sakura looked away, ashamed to admit that wasn’t true, “Not this, I didn’t tell you about this.”

It was as if that was the biggest betrayal to him. After all, they grew up with each other keeping no secrets from each other, no matter what. “Why didn’t you tell me you felt like this?” They never kept things from each other, at least Shoyo thought. It was actually heart breaking for him to realize this.

“I- I just- I didn’t know how to.” She stuttered out, “I honestly was still trying to understand how I felt about it.” How was she going to really articulate to him that she had been struggling with it for a while. That she was bullied quite a bit during junior high over it. That, despite what she tried to portray to him, she was more than insecure about herself due to it. She didn’t think that it would help him to really know that. Maybe he would even feel bad about it, which she didn’t want him to.

He shook his head, “You could have at least mentioned it, because I really don’t understand. You want to just abandon me?”

“That’s not at all what I’m saying!”

“It sounds like it!”

The two were starting to get a bit more heated. Both of their emotions were starting to boil over. With Shōyō taking Sakura’s words the wrong way and Sakura getting frustrated she couldn’t get it right, things were not going all too well.

“There’s nothing that would convince me to abandon you!” Sakura shouted now, “I just want to do my own thing right now, can’t you understand that at least?”

Shōyō grunted, turning away, “No. Because my sister wouldn’t just suddenly want to leave me alone.”

“I’m not- I’m not leaving you alone! At no point did I say that!” Though even if she tried to insist on it, he had turned to face away from her. She figured that with his stubbornness, he was going to make his mind up and stick with it for the time being. There wasn’t much she could say or do that would convince him otherwise. She’ll just have to try again at some point perhaps. She let out a large sigh, there might have been a few tears in her eyes as well though she disregarded that, “Look, I plan on going to Tokyo with you and the team but after that… I’m going to focus on my photography and my own friends.”

Shōyō snapped, “You actually have your own friends?”

Sakura narrowed her eyes at him, “Yes. I do.” 

“Really?” He asked sarcastically, “Okay sure, whatever.” It seemed like the conversation was over after that. Whether Sakura had anything else to say to him or any rebuttal, Shōyō wasn’t going to listen as he made his way to the bathroom to change clothes. Even when he came back both of them were quiet. 

Nothing else was said between the twins as they got themselves ready for bed. Maybe Shōyō should have apologized, maybe Sakura should have tried again to make it clear, but it was already too late. There was a bitter taste in both of their mouths. Whatever attempt that either wanted to make amends with each other was just a pipe dream at this point. If anything, this might have just made things a bit more difficult than to begin with.

---

If there was one thing that just about everyone noticed, it was that Sakura wasn’t coming to their practices as much anymore. The boys were used to having Sakura sitting on the sidelines alongside their managers and coach, so not having her there was a bit strange. There was no sarcastic or snide remarks made by her on the sidelines and it was just strange for everyone. 

“Where do you think Sakura is?” Yamaguchi asked his best friend, only a little concerned at the girl’s disappearance. She was always at their practices, even skipping her own club if it meant getting to be at theirs. A few times, Yamaguchi will admit, he has tried to convince her to go to her own club. It might have swayed her even a little bit a couple of times, but nothing too significant. As her friend, he does his best to encourage her to do well with her photography. Ever since they had a heart to heart some time ago and grown closer as friends, he likes to believe that he’s getting to her a bit. 

Perhaps that’s why she wasn’t here! Focusing on her own interests and finding her love for it. After the last gallery he saw of hers, he knew she was growing stronger in her confidence, so maybe not being at the practice was her just going to her own club to work on her passion. At least, he hoped.

Tsukishima clicked his tongue, going about his stretch like normal, “What does it matter? One less person to annoy us.”

The green-haired boy tilted his head slightly, “Even you have to be wondering though.”

He deadpanned, “No.”

Yamaguchi didn’t seem to be as convinced, he just hummed. He knows his best friend, and knows that there’s at least a little part of him that is wondering about her. Yamaguchi is more than aware that Tsukishima had a bit more of an interest in Sakura. He chalked that up to Tsukishima doing what he could to get a rise out of Sakura from time to time, or when he was annoyed by her brother. Yamaguchi couldn’t really pinpoint if Tsukishima enjoyed her being around, but he knew that Tsukishima at least noticed it. Ever since they first came into practice, Tsukishima’s eyes drifted, ever so slightly, towards the managers. It wouldn’t be all that strange, However, Yamaguchi just knew that Tsukishima was looking for Sakura. As much as he could say that Tsukishima is his best friend, the blond could still be a bit of an enigma to him. There was something that Yamaguchi noticed every once in a while from Tsukishima. He wasn’t going to voice his questions or suspicions just yet, but he knows for a fact that it has to do with Sakura.

He had a feeling that Tsukishima was frustrated by Sakura, more often than he’d like to admit. In the beginning, Yamaguchi saw why Sakura ticked him off. They are very much alike and Sakura never really acted the way that Tsukishima wanted her to when he tried to get a rise out of her. He expected her to be like her brother, much like how she looks like a clone to him. Though since she’s got quite a pessimistic personality, much like himself, Yamaguchi theorizes that Tsukishima wasn’t expecting it. He even theorizes that Tsukishima was surprised to the point that he wanted to push her to the point where she did react. Yamaguchi wasn’t supportive of this, obviously. Though what was he going to do about it? 

So he just dropped the subject. Either way, Yamaguchi might be lost in his thoughts about how his two friends were acting, but there was one person lost in his thoughts about his sister. Shōyō was the one who mainly could sense Sakura’s disappearance, since he was blaming himself for her not being there. Like a part of him was missing, and it really didn’t sit right with him.

Even if Ukai was talking to him, Shōyō wasn’t completely registering it in his mind. He was understanding the plan that Ukai wanted to try during this practice, but his mind was still thinking about the absence of his sister. Even when they were heading to school, Sakura kept herself distanced from him. He certainly wasn’t used to 

“All right, let’s get this started!” Their coach said as he rallied them all together. “Make sure you stay hydrated!”

All the boys lined up to get ready, “Right.”

As all the boys were getting ready for their practice, Yachi had something on her mind. “Um… Hinata.” She nervously tried to get Shōyō’s attention. “U-Um, I was wondering if you were okay… You and Kageyama-kun, um, uh…”

Shōyō just smiled, a bit wistfully, like he wasn’t completely hearing her, “I’m fine.”

Yachi let out a relieved sigh, glad that there might be some resolution between them. Though she could tell that there was an underlying emotion that surrounded the boy. No doubt in her mind that it was about his sister. As the boys went about their practice, Yachi thought back to the school day. Sakura had been a bit more reserved than normal, which is saying something since Sakura does love to keep to herself in class. Yachi had been a bit fussy over Sakura, she realized how pushy she might have been. But she had wanted to see if Sakura was really ok! She wanted to make sure that she wasn’t hurt, how her and her brother were after it, and if it was as bad as Yachi thought. Sakura didn’t say too much about it. Though she did reassure Yachi that everything was fine, that her brother was fine, and nothing was wrong. Yachi didn’t completely believe her, and really did try to hold herself back, but she was anxious to know. Perhaps she was being too pushy. Though she really was just worried for her friend! She just hoped that Sakura was doing okay now while at her own club. 

“Say, Yachi-chan,” a sly voice slid over to her, “where is our little paparazzi-chan?”

She blinked up at Endo, who suddenly appeared beside her. The intense gaze that he was pinpointing her with caused a shiver to crawl down her spine. “Uh, at her club, probably.”

Endo hummed, “A bit weird that she isn’t here.”

Yachi just blinked at him, “Well, m-maybe.” She really didn’t like it whenever Endo got into her personal space and looked at her like this.

He tapped his chin, “Just makes me wonder… Is our little decoy in a fight with his clone?” He really couldn’t wait to find out what was going on with the twins. Oh, how fun it might end up being.

---

When Asahi had asked Endo to stick around and help him practice a bit, Endo was more than happy to oblige. Any time he can get to hang around with his best friend, he certainly was going to take it. An added plus was getting to avoid his father for even longer by staying in the gym. So he just worked on setting the ball to Asahi so he could spike it. Then they would swap so Endo could work on his own spikes. Though they also took some breaks for Asahi to work on his serves. Since that was the biggest thing that Asahi had wanted to work on, Endo was more than happy to help him with that when needed.

Though just as Asahi served another ball over the net with some strong determination behind it, their libero came out of nowhere and saved it from hitting the floor. “Asahi-san! Endo-san! Mind if I join you?”

Asahi just blinked at him, put out that Nishinoya could easily receive his serve. “Oh, yeah. Sure.”

Endo shrugged his shoulders noncommittally, “I guess.” He had been hoping to just have practice between him and Asahi, but he supposed that it was fine. Nishinoya could join if he wanted. Not that he was going to be salty about it or anything, he’s not Tsukishima. Besides out of the others to join, Endo supposed that Nishinoya was alright.

Nishinoya excitedly asked, “Would you mind hitting some of my tosses?”

“Yeah, sure.” It took a moment for the libero’s words to hit him, but Asahi blinked when he finally understood, “Uh, wait, what? You’re going to toss?”

“Did you change positions?” Endo asked, also thoroughly confused.

Nishinoya smiled, “I’ll help you with your serves, too, Asahi-san. Then I can help Endo with your receives since they’re horrible.”

Endo scowled, “they’re not that bad.”

A determined look came over Asahi’s face, “Sure. Let’s do this.”

“All right!”

So the trio practiced for a while. Nishinoya worked on his technique to toss the ball, Asahi worked on his serves, and Endo was just there helping them out where they needed to. Not that Endo thought he didn’t have anything that he could work on, he certainly could improve a lot of his skills. Though what was the point in him working on something when two starters had to work on something. It was more important.

At one point, Asahi had said he needed a break to go to the bathroom, so obviously they paused. Endo sat himself down against the edge of the wall, a bit tired. He wasn’t exactly tired from practicing, since he was really just hitting the ball to Nishinoya for him to set and Asahi to 

“Endo,” Nishinoya said, standing over him now “Do you really want to be on this team?”

He chuckled loudly, “Whoa, quite blunt there, Nishi!”

“With you I know I have to be.” The libero then peered down closely at him, “So?” 

Endo didn’t really like the way that Nishinoya was staring at him. Like he was trying to look right through him to find out what was going on in his head. He never likes when people try to do that. Endo pursed his lips in thought, before deciding on what to say, “My father… He’s not exactly supportive of me staying on the team.”

“Though you’re still here.”

Endo scoffed, “Obviously! I will take any chance I get to spite him! Though he did say some things that made me question why I’m here to begin with.” 

After the loud conversation that he had with his father about volleyball, his future career and their relationships as a whole, Endo was at a bit of a loss. There were revelations between them that it was a good thing that they talked about. Even though Endo said to him that he wanted to keep doing volleyball during his highschool career, he questioned it still. If he really didn’t intend on continuing playing into university what was the point of playing now? Should he be focusing on his studies for his entrance exams? Going with his father to the company and learning more about it?

“Hey!” Nishinoya shouted, abruptly breaking Endo from his own thoughts, “If you’re starting to have doubts about being on the team, figure it out quickly! Either get off the team or stay!” Endo blinked at the loudness of his friend, with his mouth a bit agape at his yells. Nishinoya continued with a hard look on his face, “If you leave I’ll definitely call you a coward, though understand why, especially with your father breathing down your neck.”

Endo scoffed, “My father did make some good points, since I’m destined to work at his company and take over when the time comes, I should be focusing on my studies more.”

At the mention of studying, Nishinoya’s nose wrinkled. “So? Are you going to quit now, even when we’re close to getting a chance at winning!”

Endo had put quite a lot into this team. Effort that his father may not understand, but effort that Endo was proud of. So what was he going to do? He licked his lips, “I wanted to stick around for as long as I can, I want to see you guys win. I want to see Asahi happy because of it.” Yeah, he definitely would be more than content with seeing Asahi happy. He shook his head, “Though it’s not like I’m important to the team or anything.”

“It doesn’t matter if you're a starter or a bench warmer, you’re a part of this team!” Nishinoya said strongly, seemingly trying to get that notion out of Endo’s head.

Endo didn’t think that he was valuable to the team, not in the slightest. He was never a starter, his teammates were always so much better than him, and he never put the same amount of time into the team like they did. He did what was asked of him, but never overachieved. Nishinoya saying that he was important to the team was… 

Nishinoya continued, “All I’m saying is either commit or don’t waste more time!”

---

Yeah, Nishinoya is right, Endo thought every time he was at practice after that day. He never knew he would believe that, but Nishinoya does have his moments it seems. So as time past and they had their practices, Endo was making his decision. He wanted to stick around. He wants to be with his friends, he’s only in high school once, and he wasn’t going to let the responsibilities of adulthood haunt him yet.

Karasuno’s practices were going well. The team was coming up with new playstyles, improving on their existing skills and having fun doing it. Yes, Shoyo was a bit of a downer at times, most likely due to his sister’s absence, but he worked through it.

Not seeing Sakura at practice had become the norm. It worried a few, didn’t matter to others, and was interesting to one. After all, everyone had been accustomed to having her at every practice no matter what since the beginning of the school year. Everyone figured that it had to do with the fight that had happened between their sunshine decoy and gloomy setter. However, they had to wonder what Sakura thought about it. 

Meanwhile, Sakura was at her own club, listening in on the plans for the “Heroes” gallery. She wouldn’t say that she’s happier not being at the volleyball practices, but she also wasn’t upset about not being there. She did miss getting to talk with Kiyoko and Yachi. However, not having to deal with the volleyball idiots like Tsukishima, Nishinoya, Kageyama, Tanaka, Endo was a near god-send. Now she just had to deal with the idiots within her own club. So she was… content for the time being. Even if she was still upset about the argument she had with her brother. Though she’d push that to the back of her mind. They had the gallery tonight, just before summer vacation started, so they were getting that all settled. She certainly was excited about that since she got the photo that she wanted. Even if it made her feel a bit… sorrowful.  Though for now she’d just focus on how Ito and Wada were arguing yet again about something trivial.

In the volleyball club’s gym, Takeda gathered the boys all together. “Now, that it’s summer vacation, we can practice from morning to night.” He said to the group after one of their practices, “And starting tomorrow, we’ll resume the Tokyo away games. This time, we’ll be there for a solid week! This is the first and last long-term training camp before the spring tournament prelims. Let’s make the most of this opportunity, so we have no regrets entering the spring tournament prelims.” All of the boys definitely were eager to get the chance to play against such talented teams at the camp. One of the most eager, was Shōyō. Even with the fact that his sister and him hadn’t been on the best of terms, he put all his effort in getting better. With the team and his time with old Coach Ukai, he certainly thinks that he’s improved. Hopefully, he could use that to convince Sakura that she doesn’t need to leave to “find her identity” when she should be perfectly fine with being his twin.

---

Blog Masterlist | Red Herring Masterlist | Last Chapter | Next Chapter

A/N: Ah, so a little bit of conflict between the twins now, and it's serious. I figured I wanted their to be some misunderstanding between the twins since they never have had something like that happen to them before. They're not perfect siblings, but they've never argued to the point of staying away from each other, you know what I mean. Just figured it was a good way to have some character development between them. Then we've got the Tokyo training camp coming up next, but before that, we've got another gallery to see from Sakura! Not going to lie, I feel like the actual dialogue that I wrote for the agreement between Shōyō and Sakura was a bit... lacking, but I think it does it's job. Until the next one, my friends~

[chronicallyonlinecath]

Saturday 24th June 2023 - Bands, Lyn Lapid and parties (but i wasn't invited) I currently have 'to love in the 21st century' blasting my eardrums out as I type this, so I think it's fair to say Lyn is singlehandedly making me deaf by the time im 20.

I also got a huge part in the local production of Little Women - Beth!! She's the second-youngest sister and I am super excited to play hear as I adore Little Women in general, the movie and books are incredible. Rehearsals start soon and the performances are in October.

I'm not sure if anyone remembers that I tried to ask Janek out - let's just say it was one hell of a failure. It's almost been two weeks since I asked and I still have no answer. I can't really be bothered to try and ask him again - I'm taking it as a no and moving on as best as I can. He's currently at Harvey's for a party, which is basically just a boys' night in. With alcohol, I believe. Which, definitely could be interesting. Mattson is there too, as is Eliot. Harvey did consider inviting Alison and I but decided against it, since well, it's a guys' night. To be honest, I probably would've spent most of my time avoiding Janek as to not make it awkward and trying to stick to Alison's side while she flirts helplessly with Harvey. So I would've been third-wheeling at a guys' night. Not the best. Talking of parties, Harry and Matty got invited to Sienna's, a girl I used to sit next to in chem. Alison and Valerie are going too. I hope they have a good time, imma just sit here and type and write cards and scrapbook for most of the evening now. Today was spent at band rehearsal because I have a concert tomorrow evening and we are not prepared for it - but I know I probably will be fine as long as I play the right notes (and I can do that. I hope.) It's also Reagan's birthday fling tomorrow, and the council are going to an escape room, which could be seriously interesting. I'm sure I'll hear all about it and I'll keep whatever strangers who read these updated. Anyway I'm off, I have thank-you cards to write and a scrapbook to doodle on. ~CM

[gon-and-killuas-mother]

disliking this pattern of waking up around 3-4 pm, taking medicine and feeding cats, just to go back to sleep for a few more hours.

like. i'm still gonna lay back down in a few minutes. it feels like i still haven't rested enough. but lately it's like i've only been awake for eight or nine hours at a time. i haven't even been able to go to therapy just bc i kept missing appointments and i gave up trying.

on the other hand, this is the first time i've been allowed to just. rest. for as long as i need to. with no worries about having to get up for work or force myself to align with someone else's schedule.

my entire life, i was told to fix my priorities, bc sleep was less important than school and work and family time and chores and homework. and then i'd get a talking to about my productivity or my performance in school or at work because i'm too exhausted to focus.

and when i lived with mom again for a year and a half, of course it got worse. my exhaustion didn't matter. and i knew it didn't matter to my mom, because she would be like

"tell me why you haven't done (insert thing, like job search or dog training or art commissions etc etc), and without any of your excuses."

the second she would say "excuse", it was like i lost. bc i didn't understand what she meant. how could i explain that the reason i wasn't "productive" every single fucking day wasn't a goddamn excuse, it was THE REASON.

i was a fucking zombie during the day. sleep meant nothing if i had to get up before i was rested anyway. and it drove her nuts that i had to sleep so much. she'd get passive aggressive telling me i should get up before noon, and she'd use the same tone as when she'd insist i do "grown up" things (while also refusing to treat me like one)

so every day now i've just. let myself sleep. despite the guilt about being unproductive. and despite how much i miss going outside every day. i know one day i won't be struggling so much, and i can take regular trips to a park or something.

but today's Sunday so whatever imma smoke a bowl and nap a little more, fuck you mom for instilling existential guilt in my soul